Of course I would sit down and watch writer and director Chuck Magee's 2022 movie "Cocaine Crabs From Outer Space", no doubt about it. I mean, the title in itself was sufficient to get my attention.
Sure, I harbored zero expectations to the movie, as I doubted that it would be anywhere near the level of "Cocaine Bear". But I still opted to watch the movie and give it a fair chance.
Granted, I knew that "Cocaine Crabs From Outer Space" was going to be bad, but come on. I mean, they used inarticulate toy crabs of hard plastic, without any moveable parts. And that just makes this movie insanely horrible to sit through if you don't enjoy low budget lousy movies.
Needless to say that I wasn't familiar with a single actor or actress on the cast list in this horrible movie. Suffice it to say that you're not in for 83 minutes of Shakespearian theater when you sit down to watch a movie like "Cocaine Crabs From Outer Space".
The effects are so bad that you can't help but laugh when you see it. And you can see the fishline wire that they used to make the crabs "crawl" around with. It was just hilarious how low key and bad the effects are in this movie.
There was even a plastic crab in the movie holding a sign that reads "ridiculous, isn't it?". So the movie didn't take itself serious, and with good cause. Also a cake with the words "congratulations on quitting smoking" being served for a toddler. And a bowling ball drinking beer. Pretty darn strange, if you ask me.
"Cocaine Crabs From Outer Space" is a low budget movie, and one that requires a particular mindset in order to sit down and enjoy. You need to have a preference for cheesy, home-made, low budget movies if you find enjoyment in this 2022 movie. So it is not a movie that will find an audience everywhere.
And I never thought that in my lifetime that I would get to see inarticulate plastic crabs perform circus acts. But here we are.
The movie's cover over-sells the movie by a thousandfold. Don't set your expectations up to high here.
My rating of "Cocaine Crabs From Outer Space" lands on a very, very generous four out of ten stars. It was so bad that it was actually somewhat bearable to sit through.