The Glass Virgin

Baby-faced Brendan Coyle does about as well as can be expected with the terrible writing. And that's the high point of the film. Seriously. Even the wigs are bad, much less the writing, directing, and acting. It's almost impossible to care what happens to these characters, because they are boring and stupid. Emily Mortimer in particular is beyond irritating in the ingénue role. Only worth watching if you want to feel old and tired by the end, because this movie drags on so painfully, you'll think the run time is at least twice as long as it actually is. Although, I suppose you could make a drinking game out of it, by, say, taking a shot every time the weather changes to match the character's moods, or every time a character completely overreacts to something, or every time there's an awkward attempt at a beefcake shot featuring Mr. Coyle, or every time you find yourself wondering why Ms. Mortimer has such ridiculously over-sized hair, etc.