Politician's Funeral

Professor Peter Plum: OK, already, I did it. He deserved it. He was a smug, self-satisfied jerk, and he had a chip on his shoulder the size of Mount McKinley when it came to Americans; he hated us. But I could never believe that he'd try to destroy me. I didn't want to go back to teaching. Do you have any idea how much those bozos make? I've got too many financial commitments. First, I felt trapped. There was nothing I could do. Then, after a few drinks, bingo, eureka! A solution came to me. I'd murder him. Oh, it was a pleasant fantasy at first. Then I saw him go into the billiard room with Vivienne. That was the last straw. My little fantasy became deadly serious. When Reverend Green came up to me, I was furious. But then I realized it was the best thing that could have happened to me. It made me think twice, you see. Oh, not about killing Chapman but about not getting caught. I let the vicar think he'd calmed me down. I went outside, I watched them through the window, then I saw Vivienne make a move to go. Now I was ready. Chapman was playing snooker when I went in. Thought he didn't have a care in the world. When I finished with him, he didn't. And you know what? He didn't look smug at all.