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- On a stormy night in Louisiana, six people are haunted by the spirit of a demented slave master with an insatiable erotic appetite, as they stay trapped inside a haunted mansion by a thunderstorm.
- Prehistoric cave-stud Ari wins lovely virgin Listra in a pig-catching contest, but their attempts at "Ding-Dong" keep getting interrupted by idiot battles between his tribe, The Cave Dwellers, and their neighbors, The Lake Dwellers. Annoyed that hubby would rather make war than Ding-Dong, Listra organizes the women of both tribes to go on strike and "abstain Ding-Dong" until the men stop fighting. It all happens back in the days when men carried clubs and women played ding-dong, an Italian stone-age sex comedy based on the Greek classic "Lysistrata" and filled with shapely cavewomen sporting '70s hairstyles, a gay caveman with the hots for the hero, a title tune that will follow you forever and, of course, plenty of old-fashioned Ding-Dong!
- While he's reading a book on how to be a detective, George has his clothes stolen off his back. While in his underwear he gets into trouble from the cops, finds refuge in a woman's dressing room, and manages to rescue the kidnapped daughter of a millionaire.
- After narrowly escaping the cops who try to nab him for flirting, George sees a want ad for a roller skating instructor. He gets the job, but he can't skate.