Confessions of a Sex Surrogate

Actress Alexandra Silk became a certified sex therapist after her screen career cooled off, and calls this 2-part film an "edutainment", since plenty of footage is devoted to explaining the psychology of human sexuality and methods of therapy. For fans of traditional roadshow films of the '30s and the sex education features at the end of the '60s it is nice to know this genre is still alive (sort of) in the 21st Century, but her picture lacks oomph.

What it specifically lacks is drama, conflict, anything of interest happening, as the principal characters working at Cassidy Center for Sex Surrogacy, a clinic run by Katy Cassidy (okay performance by Ela Darling) clinically discuss cases and treatment plans, then hump each other or the client. Scholars who claim that sex films present a "pornutopia" of idealized sex fantasies come to life will have grist to chew on watching these two idyllic portraits of sexual dysfunction.

At a minimum I expected some scandal, as the title (which Ela recites pompously to the camera at the end of each movie) states "Confessions". It also would have made sense, either live or in flashback, to show the clients' problems and their effect on their lives, marriage - at least to set up some drama and suspense. But Silk and her producer/marriage partner Luc Wylder who co-wrote this tedious screenplay steer clear of titillation. The documentary, aloof approach is true to White Coater tradition, not for better but for worse.

In Volume 1 we are introduced to the setting, the only point of interest for me. The clinic is housed in the "Immoral Proposal" mansion, so named by me after Nica Noelle's movie of that name starring April O'Neil. Its distinctive spiral staircase is the setting for a reverse gang bang involving Dr. Mark Hill, played by lucky Richie Calhoun, and a trio of beauties, 2 massage therapists (bosomy Jenna Ivory and Jay Taylor) and his colleague Riley Reynolds. The gals suck and are humped by Richie right at that mansion's famous spiral staircase, flanked in the background by its unique oval-paned doors. Same location is used for many other scenes, including ones purporting to be taking place elsewhere, but having seen it dozens of times on XXX screens it holds a special place in my heart.

Very little of the cases is shown, as the movie is a bait and switch in that department. We learn about techniques to battle the manly malady of our age, as surrogate intern Ana Foxxx jerks off a happy client, using a "start-stop masturbation" technique. Discussions introduce technical jargon and all sorts of authoritative knowledge - even moreso than an episode of "Masters of Sex" on Showtime, but I found all that blather boring, especially since the cast (notably Riley) recite the speeches in a rote fashion. Silk's desire to educate the public has gotten the better of her artistic instincts.

A location scene at a sex shop permits therapist Chad Alva to hump the hot sales lady (Katrina Jade), who brings an earthy Alektra Blue type of porn star presence to the moribund film. But it's too late to save a sinking ship. Finale has star Ela road- testing some dildos. Earlier, the pretty actress with many a Girlfriends Films feature under her belt has a lesbian scene with Kasey Warner.

Sequel is even worse, a total snoozer.