Talk:Teleost/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Dunkleosteus77 (talk · contribs) 02:58, 4 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Comments by Dunkleosteus77

Specific comments

I see mainly British English used but I see "color" multiple times. Also, if this is written in British English, add the template {{British English}} to the top of the article's talk page

Article is not British; changed all "colour" to "color". Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:10, 4 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In that case, I see "specialise", "behaviour", "minimise", and several other examples of British English.

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 15:16, 5 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Also, if this is written in American English, it would be best to use imperial units rather than the metric system. An easy to do this is to add the parameter |order=flip to all the {{convert}} templates. For example, {{convert|6|kg|lbs|order=flip}}

Done. How clever! Cwmhiraeth (talk) 11:14, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

I think the Importance to humans section should be expanded a bit; Teleosts are very important to humans (economically at least)

Added a main link to Fishing; added details of major commercial species and importance to employment, with refs. Chiswick Chap (talk) 07:51, 10 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

General comments

Convert short tons (or long tons) to metric tons as done with meters to feet. As well as this, make sure all units in the metric system also have a conversion (in parentheses) in imperial units
In the Anatomy section, change "The first three arches are include a..." to "The first three arches include a..."

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:18, 4 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Diversity section, change "By the time they arrive they are..." to "By the time they arrive, they are..."

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:21, 4 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Diversity section, change "Some species, such as electric eels can..." to "Some species, such as electric eels, can..."

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:21, 4 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Diversity section, change "Other fish such as knifefish generate..." to "Other fish, such as knifefish, generate..."

Done, although, sometimes, it feels, I think, as if we may, perhaps, be breaking up the, er, flow. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:21, 4 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Diversity section, change "...the advantage that when they lie on the seabed, both..." to "...the advantage that, when they lie on the seabed, both..."

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:21, 4 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Distribution section, change "zero Celsius" to "zero degrees Celsius" or "0° C"

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:12, 4 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Distribution section, change "...the tropics; and the Atherinomorpha..." to "...the tropics; the Atherinomorpha..." or "...the tropics. The Atherinomorpha..."

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:15, 4 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Distribution section, change "Teleosts including the brown trout and the scaly osman are..." to "Teleosts, including the brown trout and the scaly osman, are..."

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:16, 4 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Respiration section, change "...and like freshwater eels are..." to "...and freshwater eels are..." or "...and species like freshwater eels are..."

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:17, 4 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Sensory systems section, change "...developed sense organs" to "...developed sensory organs"

Done. LittleJerry (talk) 22:21, 6 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Sensory systems section, wikilink "chemoreceptor"

Done. LittleJerry (talk) 22:21, 6 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Sensory systems section, wikilink "Weberian organ" (the article it redirects to is called "Weberian apparatus")

Already linked above. LittleJerry (talk) 22:21, 6 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Make sure that the template {{convert}} is used every time units are involved

Done, except for one temperature conversion where the template produces an anomalous result. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 11:58, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

For temperature, use either template {{convert|-272|C/F}} or template {{convert|-300|C/F|C/F K}}. I recommend using imperial units since this is written in American English, so for the measurements with only a measure in Celsius, add the parameter order=flip to make it convert from Fahrenheit to Celsius instead of Celsius to Fahrenheit.

Your templates don't work for me. I think the present arrangement "temperatures 19 °F (10 °C) above the surroundings" seems satisfactory. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 18:15, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

The template you have now added is wrong because it appears as "19 °F (−7 °C) ". We are not talking about an absolute temperature here, but a difference in temperature, where 10°C is equivalent to about 19°F. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 19:32, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Buoyancy section, wikilink "Chondrostei", and removed the quotation marks around it

Done. The quotes indicated the group was paraphyletic. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:44, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Reproduction and lifecycle section, wikilink "Chondrichthyes" (unless it's referring to Chondrostei)

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:44, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Reproduction and lifecycle section, change "This is because, the physiological..." to "This is because the physiological..."

Done. It's fine for the reviewer to fix such minor things, quicker than writing out a sentence-long comment. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:44, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Sex identity and determination section, change "Some teleosts, such as zebrafish (Danio rerio) have..." to "Some teleosts, such as zebrafish (Danio rerio), have..."

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:44, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Sex identity and determination section, change "...is the main factor but PH levels..." to "...is the main factor, but PH levels..."

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:44, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Hermaphroditism section, change "...come in two forms; simultaneous and sequential" to "...come in two forms: simultaneous and sequential"

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:44, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Mating tactics section, change "One notable examples are the clownfish" to "One notable example is the clownfish"

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:44, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Mating tactics section, change "Individuals of one sex, usually males will developed secondary sexual characteristics" to "Individuals of one sex, usually males, will develop secondary sexual characteristics"

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:44, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Mating tactics section, change "In dolphinfish (Coryphaena)" to "In dolphinfish (Coryphaena)"

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:46, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Mating tactics section, change "In several minnow species, male develop..." to "In several minnow species, males develop..."

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 10:45, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Mating tactics section, wikilink "ossified ridge" to the Ossification article

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 10:45, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Mating tactics section, change "...shows that the drive to reproductive can be..." to "...shows that the drive to reproductive success can be..." or "...shows that the drive to reproduce can be..."

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:44, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Mating tactics section, change "where small males that where unable to" to "where small males that were unable to"

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 11:00, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Spawning sites and parental care section, change "Water column spawners are most limited to..." to "Water column spawners are mostly limited to..."

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 11:00, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Spawning sites and parental care section, change "...or even borrows" to "...or even burrows"

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 11:00, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Spawning sites and parental care section, change "...which prove nutrients for..." to "...which provide nutrients for..."

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 11:00, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Spawning sites and parental care section, change "...and protect the territory" to "...and protecting the territory"

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 11:00, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Growth and development section, change "...four major live stages; the egg..." to "...four major life stages: the egg..."

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 11:08, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Growth and development section, change "Some larvae where even considered..." to "Some larvae were even considered..."

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 11:08, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Growth and development section, change "...greater physiological tolerance and sensitivity and ecological and behavioral competence" to "...greater physiological tolerance and sensitivity, ecological and behavioral competence"

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 11:08, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Growth and development section, change "...the transition more complex..." to "...the transition is more complex..."

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 11:08, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Importance to humans section, change "...perhaps 62 percent of..." to "...perhaps 62% of..."

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:35, 7 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Final comments

In the Importance to humans section, change "Wolf fish" to "Wolffish", but if you want to keep it two words, you can also use "Sea wolves". Also, wikilink it

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 19:27, 15 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

In the Importance to humans section, expand on the sentence talking about genetics. Maybe include why zebrafish are more commonly used than other species (I assume it's because of their short lifespan)

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 19:33, 15 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

References

Refs like "Wooten and Smith" don't actually link to the book they're citing (in the Further reading section). Add to the book in the Further reading section the parameter ref={{harvid|Wooten and Smith|2014}} then replace the refs in the article {{sfn|Wooten and Smith|2014|loc=insert page number and (optional) link}}
For ref no. 4 (Vertebrae Paleontology), add the parameters |edition=3 and |chapter=The Evolution of Fishes After the Devonian; the link leads to a google book that specifies the year as 2005, but the ref says it's 2009

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:03, 4 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

For newsgroups (such as BBC news), use template {{cite newsgroup}} instead of {{cite web}}. Note the |publisher= parameter should not be used for the template {{cite newsgroup}}

Done. LittleJerry (talk) 05:52, 5 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

I have changed these to {{cite news}} because {{cite newsgroup}} was bringing up error messages. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 06:15, 5 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Was the publisher parameter present? This should not be there because it should automatically give the name of the newsgroup provided the url is present. User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 23:20, 5 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

For books refs, where applicable, make sure the |edition= parameter is present.

Not sure what that means. LittleJerry (talk) 05:52, 5 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

If you used the 5th edition of John Doe's Fishes then you write |edition=5 in the cite ref template. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:32, 5 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Done. LittleJerry (talk) 16:48, 5 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

The doi for ref no. 48 is 10.1002/jez.401

Done. LittleJerry (talk) 04:28, 6 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

The ISBN for ref no. 1 points to a copy in German. Use ISBN-10:1840281529 or ISBN-13:978-1840281521 instead, which should point to the English copy

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 09:32, 11 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

You might want to be consistent in using either ISBN-10 or ISBN-13

I will try to make them all ISBN-13. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 09:32, 11 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

The link for ref no. 9 (Guinness book of world records) leads to a page about buying a copy.

It works for me. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 09:32, 11 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]