User:DWIII

DWIII: Mad scientist with mad hair.

DWIII doesn't really believe the Solar System looks like this — or does he???

DWIII is an Uncyclopedian with ~~an axe to grind~~ an atrociously-bad hairstyle. He is currently (as of 2023) serving his second and disjoint term as an Administrator of this ~~godforsaken dump~~ fun-loving community. He delights in tidying up other contributors's contributions, but nobody knows why.

This user is an administrator, which explains their exceptionally high stress levels.

This mathematical user loves pi

This user is a bit of a pyromaniac.

AA!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAA AAAAAAA AAAAAAA!!!

ego	This user is a deluded egomaniac.

This user believes the Mozilla Firefox could easily defeat Godzilla.

ht-3

This user is able to contribute with an advanced level of HTML.

This user is a Mad Scientist.

Biography[edit | edit source]

DWIII was unexpectedly born in 1963, even though nobody previously asked him^[1] his opinion concerning this.^[2] He stumbled headlong into teh Internet (c. 1998) after hearing wonderful rumors of pr0n and intellectual content, but failed to find either after many years of ardent searching. He quickly hid behind his current moniker in order to camouflage his original God-given and embarrassingly wussy name (it didn't work).^[3]

Having generally outraged the esteemed Usenet community with mountains of tedious drivel on diverse arcane subjects, DWIII eventually discovered Uncyclopedia to be the perfect dumping ground for his l33t riting skIllz (such as they are).

DWIII invented egocentrism in 1971 and currently dabbles in experimental and applied creation science.^[4] He admires such modern literary giants as Isaac Asimov, Douglas Adams, and Dr Seuss. (The fact that they are all currently dead is, of course, a complete coincidence.)

FAQ about DWIII and his Draconian editorial practices[edit | edit source]

What does "DWIII" stand for?: It is quite literally and figuratively amazing how many times I have been asked that question.

What do think about my new article?: Frankly, it sucks.

Some unappreciative jerk stamped "ICU" on my article, but since then I have turned it into a literary masterpiece worthy of great accolades and such. May I remove the ICU tag myself now?: Yes, provided that your article doesn't suck anymore.

Do you have any advice on how I can make my article better?: Yes. Make it look like a standard Wikipedia article (check out Uncyclopedia:Style Guide for guidance), at least superficially. It will probably still suck content-wise, but it will look oh so much nicer, thereby allowing you to get away with outright murder (so to speak).

How do I make my article more popular?: Beats me. The fact that it sucks so bad doesn't help matters.

I've make dozens of identical and pointless edits to dozens of unrelated articles because I think I am so kewl and such. Why did you revert all of them?!?: What, are you a flaming moron or something?

Hi im trying to edit the page for ***** but i keep getting caught in the spam filter, can you do something to help out?: No. That's what the spam filter is for.

Where do I report a real UFO siting?: It is quite literally and figuratively amazing how many times I have been asked that question.

I am *NOT* Jorje Gomez!!!!: I'm sorry, that is not in the form of a question.

Articles written by other Uncyclopedians that made DWIII laugh (which is damn near impossible these days)[edit | edit source]

Papercuts of Doom (It's brilliant! It's gripping! It's short!!!)
Oscar Meyer
Marcel Proust
Neutron star
Magic mushroom
Random humor
Things you're supposed to be doing instead of visiting Uncyclopedia (i laughed until i cried... then i laughed again & cried some more...)
Isaac Asimov
Alfred the Great

Articles initiated by DWIII which eventually attained feature-status[edit | edit source]

Deconstruction barrel (featured article)
The Flintstones (featured article)
My Dog Has Fleas (featured article)
Still life (featured article)
Styrofoam (featured article)
Table of Contents (featured article)
UnNews:Gerry-meandering Mississippi River declared unconstitutional by Supreme Court (featured article)
UnNews:New Florida bill would abolish all pronouns (featured article)

updated: 12:31, 9 April 2023 (UTC)

Footnotes[edit | edit source]

↑ DISCLAIMER: Irrespective of anything else that may be written here, DWIII's personal pronouns are at your complete and utter discretion. Feel free to knock yourselves out(!).
↑ Or it could just be his bad memory.
↑ It still doesn't work.
↑ Various lawsuits concerning inadvertent damages to the ecosphere are still pending.

[1] DISCLAIMER: Irrespective of anything else that may be written here, DWIII's personal pronouns are at your complete and utter discretion. Feel free to knock yourselves out(!).

[2] Or it could just be his bad memory.

[3] It still doesn't work.

[4] Various lawsuits concerning inadvertent damages to the ecosphere are still pending.

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