My mum said I needed company, so I started one

Bored, stuck in a long ass meeting. When suddenly someone brings up the program I made. People start complementing it.

Today's gonna be a good day.

When people tell me their problems I immediately start coming up with solutions when really they just want sympathy.

You know you've succeeded as a parent/programmer when your kids start counting up from 0.

Everytime I start up my computer be like...

Boss: Every day is a new opportunity to start fresh
Me: Can we start over this project because I fucked it up and I don't want to clean it
Boss: No

TV series. If u start u will end up wasting hours

"But I don't know where to start..."

"... just start typing, be willing to mess up, and if you get lost just start over with better understanding from messing up. Eventually it'll work."

Instead of splitting up engineers by team, they should start by splitting up those who prefer the lights on, and those who want them off.

Then we can all be happy.

You ever sit down to start working on a project, get all your imports and variables set up, and then just completely lose all motivation to even press a key?

Just finished reading this gem from start to end. It is over 20 years old and it is crazy how it is still up to date and applicable. Great work.

Is it weird to like being in the office a couple hours before everyone else shows up so I can start my day with peace and quiet?

Just finished all the form function, time to clean up I guess.

Did you guys like to write it clean from start or do it later at the end?

Don't you hate when you switch languages and start to mix up naming conventions?

When you Start Up Android Studio to do some development but spend 1h fixing random gradle errors.

Technical Founder at today's meeting: "All of you guys have work-life balance. It shouldn't be like that. We need act like a startup. You guys need to work really hard. This guy (pointing at me) once worked 10 hours each day, where I worked 16 hours. We really need to move fast."

I'll just leave this words here.

Open source block chain neural network binary tree growth hacker synergy vertically integrating cryptocurrency game changing GDPR compliant internet of things node.js quantum computing start up that'll disrupt and pivot the cloud based ecosystem

I'm gonna start a software company and cleverly split up the work into pieces so that I can present them to potential employees as "coding challenges" during the interview and never actually hire them.

Let's start up a start up for start ups.

My first time using Mac:
"Where's the Start? Wtf is command!? Why are the windows maximizing halfway... How do I rename this file? How do I freakin' maximize this app!? I give up..."

Start-up: hires 3 junior devs to save money.

Start-up: expects things to get done faster-- BUT-- Start-up keeps adding things to the TO-DO list and backlog-- i.e. it's all relative!!

Start-up: gets angry at 3 junior devs why they can't deliver when they keep adding tasks and ask we fall behind.

Dev team: "Seriously? You hire more devs to finish tasks faster, but you keep adding more than are being finiahed-- obviously it's gonna take longer now regardless"

Git --pull life together

Ummmmm sorry windows but I think you might have fucked up while “counting”.. the drive isn’t even 4TB to start.
I’m really confused how this could occur lol

Every time I mess up my git branch I usually find that its pretty futile to fix it with fancy commands like 'git reset', 'git prune', 'git rebase', etc. I usually find it easier to just start over from scratch.

They should really add a command for that

'git fuck-it-start-over'

Work at a start-up they said. It will be fun they said.
It's awesome, the learning curve is unbelievable.
But your personal life? Destroyed.
Weekends? Sleeping more than 6-7 hours a day? Forget about it.

why is it so hard to convince people to start using slack chat and giving up sending internal emails?

I go to college online and I was really excited to start my classes for my major as I finally wrapped up general ed classes. This is a week 1 assignment for Introduction to Computer Science....