Chapter Text
Murphy felt like utter shit by the time the bus arrived, his face was throbbing and he just wanted to crawl into his bed and die. But of course, he couldn't do that. No, he had an entire day of school ahead of him that had to get over and done with first. How fucking great was that? Fantastic. He was sitting near the front of the bus, alone and hunched over so no one could see his face. His hood was pulled up for good measure. Yet all he could hear was Finn, Clark, Raven and Bellamy sitting behind him laughing and chatting about their weekend and how great it had been. Woo-hoo for fucking them, that's fantastic. Not really, only for Bellamy. He was sitting boasting about the great weekend he'd had with his mom and little sister, they'd gone out for dinner and had the best time.
Yet, there was Murphy, he had the shittiest weekend possible. He'd been pushed down the stairs on Friday evening and told to clean the kitchen. With what? he wasn't so sure because his mom hadn't gone shopping in god knows how long. He was surprised he wasn't skinnier than he was with how little he ate. All he'd managed all weekend was two sandwiches, and that was only because he'd gone out to the supermarket and found some really cheap ready-made ones in the fridge aisle. That had been a very lucky find, but even then, he probably wouldn't have been all that hungry even if he hadn't ate. That's how used he was to not eating. Probably not a good thing, but that's just how it was. Saturday had been shit too, he'd basically spent the day in his room after being to the shops and studied so he could forget about his aching body. Hopefully he wouldn't fail the quiz in history today just because of that five hour study session. Sunday had been a waste, he'd stayed in bed all day and looked online for places he could get a job so he would maybe be able to feed himself and clean the house. He didn't suppose many people would want to accept him though, he looked homeless half the time, he was underweight... the list went on.
Murphy felt something hit the back of his head, he turned round with a frown on his face. Could people just not bother him? He wanted to be left alone. But... the person staring back at him was Bellamy and he looked a little guilty, "Sorry! I didn't mean to hit you." He offered the other boy a smile, clearly hoping Murphy would't maul him for the accident.
"Bell, don't apologize to him, he's an asshole." Raven told him loudly, so Murphy could hear (obviously), holding onto Bellamy's arm. She was always glued to his side, flirting with him though Murphy wasn't sure Bellamy liked it all that much, he usually moved her off of him as soon as he could. Which made him pretty happy to be honest. He didn't want to see other people hanging off his crush, that hurt his heart. Did he even have a heart though? It didn't feel like it, Murphy was sure he just had a black empty hole in his chest which is why he was such an uncaring prick to everyone around him. He wished he could be as nice and as caring as the other, taller boy. But that was a wish that would never be granted.
Murphy hesitated before shrugging towards Bellamy and turning away, he didn't want to listen to the rest of that group putting him down, he did that enough himself and received more than enough criticism from home to last him a lifetime. He curled up in his chair again, head against the window as he listened to the group begin to bitch about what an ass he was. This was a daily occurrence, the group voicing their opinions of him extremely loudly. No one else spoke to Murphy, so he was always left alone with those thoughts and the words echoing around his head. He wasn't good enough.
The bus pulled up outside school and Murphy was off the bus in an instant, ignoring the pain he was feeling as he practically legged it up to the doors. If he got in fast enough he'd be able to get to his first class and avoid being bullied any more. For at least an hour anyways. He was going to be early, but he knew the teacher didn't mind, he just sat in the back corner and read his book. He really wasn't a bother most of the time, it was only when he was provoked and insulted that he would cause a riot.
He was sitting in the back of the room within the next five minutes, and he still had a good 20 minutes till class started, so, he pulled his book out and sat silently, drinking in the words off the page. He loved reading, it took him away from the pain that was his reality and gave him a new one to live in, he could imagine himself there with the characters, even just in the background. In a world where he wasn't relentlessly bullied, where he was possibly dating a super hot boy that took care of him and treated him like a princess because deep down that was what he wanted, even if his outwards appearance and attitude made it seem otherwise.
Other students began to make their way into the classroom, chatting loudly and interrupting Murphy's concentration, so he put his book away and sat quietly, fidgeting with the sleeves of his hoodie. The one item of clothing he had on that wasn't falling apart. Haha, his clothing symbolized his life, falling apart... not funny Murphy, shut up. The class started soon enough and everyone took their seats, listening as the teacher began to talk about the work they were doing currently in class. Murphy listened and took notes, he did honestly want to do well in his classes and he tried his very best. He wasn't gonna slack off.
Obviously class was uneventful, next it was History and that passed by fairly quickly, Murphy was sure he'd done okay on the quiz they'd been given. He wasn't holding his hopes out for full marks because he never got anything that good in his life. He was lucky to get half of anything on a good day. But he dealt with it, wasn't like he was dying. Yet. No, he wasn't there yet, maybe not far unless he managed to feed himself. But, he'd see, what happened happened. Wasn't like his life was much good anyways, he could deal with losing it. Maybe dying would be a blessing considering how shitty the week had begun. That way he wouldn't have to deal with any more bullies or his mother ever again. But then he would never get to see Bellamy's gorgeous face again, now, that was awful. He didn't want to miss that, or possibly miss a glimpse of his toned abs.
Gym was after lunch; maybe he could get a glimpse then, maybe that would cheer him up some. But, he had to survive till after lunch for that, and he wasn't planning on taking much part in the lesson, his body ached too much for him to be able to properly play the games they would be playing. Lunch would be hard enough to get through anyways, getting through it without any abuse would be a miracle and rarely happened. And, as before mentioned, luck was not on his side today.