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"I'm not going."
Buck feels like his heart is going to beat out of his chest. It probably is beating out of his chest, really; wedged in neatly next to Eddie's, thumping in time with his. "What?"
"I'm not going," Eddie repeats. He's looking at Buck earnestly, searching his expression for something. "I talked to Chris; we came up with a plan for him to come home by Christmas."
Buck knows Eddie's speaking English. Buck's fluent in English, actually. He's been speaking it his whole life, but for some reason, he's having a hard time understanding what Eddie's saying. Or maybe just believing it. "You're not moving?"
"Absolutely not," Eddie says firmly. His hands go to Buck's elbows squeezing lightly. "My life is here. I can't just leave it."
"You can't leave LA?"
Eddie chuckles lightly. "LA, sure. You too."
Okay, now Buck really is doubting his fluency. "Me?"
"Buck, come on." Eddie grins. "It's you. I don't know how I could do any of it without you."
"Any of what?"
Eddie gestures around him as if that would make anything clearer. "Life? Existing? Happiness?" He chuckles, head ducking down. "Besides Chris, you're kind of the epicenter of my universe."
Buck sort of gapes at him helplessly before swallowing, eyes wide and set on him. "I'm the... Eddie, really?"
Buck is grateful for Eddie's Swedish heritage; otherwise, he might not have been able to see the way his cheeks pinked, the color trailing down his neck. Buck finds himself wondering just how low the flush goes. "Come on, Buck. You have to know."
"Have to know what?" Buck thinks he might have an idea, but he wants Eddie to say it outright. He thinks he might have to hear it to even slightly be able to believe it.
Eddie hesitates before a burst of confidence spreads across his features. "How much I love you," he admits. "How much I think I'll always love you. How much I need you. How much I want to keep you for myself."
Buck's heart stops. He would know what that feels like, and he can recognize that now. "Eddie," he chokes out, "as if I could ever not love you back."
Eddie laughs lightly, some odd amount of disbelief slipping through. "Really? Me?"
Buck smiles. "Who else? You're kind of perfect. I've been falling in love with you for the past seven years. I think I'll probably keep falling more and more until the day I die."
"I'm not perfect."
"Perfect for me," Buck amends. "Everything I could ever want. The only person I think I could ever love like this."
Buck actually thinks there may be no one more lovable than Eddie Diaz, even as he stands in his own living room, doubt on his face. Even as he stands there, the feet between them feeling more like miles, like lightyears, like too much.
Fuck. Buck can't really hold himself back anymore, can't just look at Eddie and keep space between them. There's air in Eddie's lungs still, and it belongs to Buck, should go in his lungs and bind to his blood and travel through his body until there isn't a single fucking cell in his body that hasn't been touched by Eddie.
Its actually incredibly selfish of Eddie to have touched Buck's soul as much as he has and not his flesh. To own him so entirely and yet not at all. Buck is sick of it, actually; sick with love, sick with longing, sick with the feeling of being split from the other half of his entirety.
So maybe, when Buck breaks and crashes into Eddie, it isn't so much new as it is a natural peak. Eddie certainly seems to agree, judging by the way he meets him halfway.
Eddie's lips are a dream against his own. It's everything Buck had ever searched for in anyone else, all as the most simplistic answer possible. It's less of a kiss and more of an attempt to devour each other, like if Buck can open his mouth just that much wider, grip at Eddie's mouth with his teeth.
He doesn't feel bad about it because Eddie is doing the same. Eddie's tongue is in his mouth, touching every single atom in a frantic claim. He bites down hard on Buck's lip, and Buck swears he can taste his own blood. Deliriously, he thinks that's a good thing, that Eddie can drink all of the blood from his body if he wants.
He's so preoccupied by Eddie's mouth that he almost forgets that there's other parts to claim. Buck's reminded of Eddie's hands, large and searching, when one grips at his ass, pulling their hips together with brutal force. Buck groans into his mouth at the pressure.
Eddie grins against his mouth, his other hand pulling at the small of his back to keep him where he is. He rolls his hips, pressing their cocks together, and Buck whines helplessly, hands flying up to grip Eddie's hair, head dropping to mouth at his neck.
"Yeah, baby?" Eddie bites his ear, yanks a little bit. Buck kind of wants him to pull it off and swallow, just so he could have a piece of him inside of him. "You like that?"
As Eddie's lips trail down Buck's neck, teeth dragging sharply across the skin, Buck gasps, "Anything. You could do anything. I'd like all of it."
Eddie pushes Buck back, hands to his chest, until his back hits the wall, until he can slip his leg between Buck's, his hand sliding up to press lightly at his throat. He nips at Buck's collarbone. "Don't test me," he says lightly. "I might try everything."
He crashes their lips back together, devouring roughly and pulling back quickly. He pulls his shirt off, chest bare besides the St. Christopher medallion dangling between his pecs.
Buck thinks he may have blacked out a bit, looking at the hair trailing from his chest down his stomach, disappearing under his waistband. He could live in that chest hair. He could shave it off and turn it into a blanket, sleep in Eddie every single night.
Buck is pulled out of his thoughts by a yank to his hair. "Come on, Buck, your turn."
Fuck, he wishes he could just snap his fingers and have his shirt disappear, because he just can't pull it off fast enough. He settles for the manual way, grabbing Eddie by the waist and pulling him back in once it's off, skin to skin.
It's good, the way Eddie's teeth make home in his neck. Buck's nails are digging in between his shoulders, gripping at the bone like that could ground him. He's sure he's leaving marks behind, little red lines that he wishes would never fade.
He feels insane, actually. He's touching Eddie, Eddie's touching him, they're pressed together and grinding and clinging and yet it's not enough. He needs to cut Eddie open, needs to sew his own flesh to him, needs to break off one of his own rib bones and carve a ring out of it to claim him forever.
He's making noises under Eddie's ministrations: little whimpers and gasps that he's pretty sure he's never made before. With each one, Eddie grips him tighter, the hand around his throat squeezing almost subconsciously, his other hand firm on his ass.
He finally pulls away from Buck's shoulder, probably after having left a mark that he's sure will never fade. "Bed?" He gasps, lips swollen and beautifully red. "We need a bed for what I want to do."
Buck, even through his haze, agrees. There will be time for Eddie to fuck him against the wall, but for right now, he's pretty sure neither of their legs will be strong enough to support them through this.
Still, when Eddie tries to draw himself back, Buck grips him tighter, pawing at his shoulders to keep him close. "I can't- I can't -" he whines. The words aren't coming, but he tries to say them anyways.
"I know, sweetheart," Eddie consoles, peppering kisses across his neck. "Just for a few seconds, okay? That's it. Then we can be as close as you want."
He manages to let go, but it feels like actual torture. He's hit with a wave of cold, the A/C smacking into him, and he shivers with it, even as Eddie laces their fingers together and pulls Buck into his bedroom.
Buck doesn't waste a second, unbuckling his belt and immediately shucking the rest of his clothes. He pulls at Eddie desperately, fingers trembling as he unbuttons his pants. "Come on, come on, come on -"
"Easy, baby." Eddie helps him, pulling his pants off so he's naked in front of Buck. Buck doesn't get a chance to look, though, before Eddie is on top of him again, kissing him fiercely and pushing at him until they trip onto the bed.
Eddie takes advantage of the new angle, breaking from Buck's mouth to kiss down his chest, sucking a nipple into his mouth. Buck keens, pressing his chest up and bringing a hand to Eddie's hair, pulling at the strands.
Eddie's other hand comes up to toy with his other nipple, pinching in a way that by all means should be painful, but only makes Buck want more. He's certain all the blood in his body is contained in his dick by now, keeping him aching.
Eddie grinds his hips into Buck's thigh, lifting his head enough to let his groan fill the room. "God, baby, your fucking pecs," he moans, his hands squeezing at the flesh. "They're so fucking big, and you keep wearing those tight-ass shirts. Couldn't help but stare at your tits, baby."
"G-good," Buck sighs, trying to press his cock up to get any friction. "Wanted you to look, always want you to look, please -"
"Yeah," Eddie gasps, dropping his head back down. He mouths by Buck's navel, biting a mark in. "I'm always looking at you, baby."
Buck spreads his legs, making room for whatever Eddie wants to do. Eddie settles in nicely, pressing a surprisingly gentle kiss to the right of his cock, brushing his nose against the soft skin as he goes.
"Eddie," Buck whimpers, not caring how desperate he sounds. Trying to sound more desperate, actually, because Eddie has never denied him anything he wanted, and if he makes it clear just how much he craves this, he knows Eddie will give it to him.
Sure enough, his tongue licks gently at the tip of Buck's dick, lapping up all that he's leaked so far. Buck whines, fighting the urge to drop his head back. He needs to watch, needs to keep the eye contact with Eddie while his tongue plays at the tip of his dick, tracing the edge of the head and rubbing firmly into the slit. Eddie grabs it at the base and taps the head against his tongue once, twice, three times before closing his lips around it, sucking at the head before pulling off with a pop.
"All this pre-come," Eddie says, voice a little wrecked, "should be in me. Don't fucking waste a drop of yourself. It all belongs to me."
It's illogical; Buck knows he spurts like a fountain, dripping wet at a rate that's almost unbelievable for a guy. He'll figure out a way to hold it back so it all goes to Eddie, or he'll keep his cock buried in him so none of it goes to waste, or he'll collect every drop with his own hand and feed it to Eddie, have him lick his hand clean, anything.
Eddie drops back to his cock, taking it in his mouth inch by inch until he chokes on it, saliva dripping from the corners of his mouth and drawing paths down the rest of it. He pulls up, coughing slightly. "I'll get better at it, until I can swallow this whole fucking thing," Eddie promises, pausing to lick up the length. "I'll suck on your cock every single day if I have to."
Buck whines at this, hips perking involuntarily. "Your turn," he gasps, sitting up and pushing at Eddie weakly. "Your turn, come on, I need you in my mouth."
Eddie goes easily, flipping himself over and leaning back, hands reaching for Buck. Buck drapes himself over his body, taking the opportunity to bite at his neck and down his chest. He licks at Eddie's chest hair and nuzzles into it, sucking a mark right next to his nipple while Eddie gasps through it.
He takes the opportunity to kiss one of Eddie's nipples lightly, wetting it before huffing a light breath on it. Eddie shivers and whines, gripping at Buck's hair to pull him down, to encourage him to keep toying with his body. One of Buck's hands slides down to Eddie's dick, stroking gently in time with his lips.
"Buck," Eddie breaths, pulling at his curls. "Come on, baby, didn't you want to suck my cock?"
"Yeah," Buck gasps, as if he's just remembered. Really, he almost had forgotten, so distracted by the perfect pink of Eddie's nipples, the curl of his chest hair. He thinks it's impossible not to lose himself in the man, in whatever piece of him he's currently thrown himself.
He slips down Eddie's body, finally getting the chance to see his dick. It's thick and veiny, the head swollen and dark, practically pulsing in Buck's hand. He thinks it may be the most beautiful cock he's ever seen; granted, he hasn't seen that many, but he's sure he doesn't have to in order to know there's no better one out there, none that he would rather have buried inside of him.
He spits on the head and rubs it down the length, warming Eddie and making him groan. Then, in a practiced move, he swallows him down entirely, opening his throat to make space for the length.
Eddie jerks and gasps, unable to keep his head up. "Holy fucking shit, Buck."
He tangles his hand into his hair, massaging at his scalp. Buck looks up at him, tears in his eyes, still swallowing gently around his throat. Eddie's free hand comes up to his cheek, cupping it and rubbing away one of the tears with his thumb. "You look so pretty like this," Eddie tells him, thumb digging in a little harder. "Look like you were made to suck my dick."
Buck moans at the praise, sending the vibrations through Eddie's cock. He pulls himself off slowly, replacing his mouth with a hand. "I was made to have you in me," he says earnestly, voice scratchy. "Any way I can take you, baby, I will. I need to."
Buck pushes Eddie's thighs apart and up, draping his legs over his shoulders and onto his back. The motion shifts Eddie's hips up, showcasing the swell of his ass. Buck can't help but squeeze at it, pressing his fingertips into the soft skin. He hopes if he squeezes hard enough, his fingerprints will be left behind. He hopes they're distinct enough to mark Eddie like a brand, declare who he belongs to.
Buck can also see the furl of his hole, pink and on display for him. He leans his head down, his eyes flickering up to Eddie's, and licks at it. Eddie whines, using his hand to press Buck down hard. Buck's not complaining, though. He thinks the best way to die might be through asphyxiation, right in Eddie's ass.
He kisses at his hole, licks at it gently, alternating between sucking and nipping, eyes never leaving Eddie's. Eddie looks almost in awe, as if he didn't know anything could feel so good. Buck preens with it, licking harder, trying to shove the tip of his tongue past the muscle each time a gasp escapes Eddie's lips.
"Buck, Buck, come here," Eddie whines, pulling at Buck's shoulders. He goes up easily, slots his mouth against Eddie's, stretching his legs even further with the movement.
Eddie takes the distraction as an opportunity to flip them over, pushing Buck into the mattress. Buck whines with it, opening his mouth up for Eddie to take.
Eddie lifts off Buck and pulls at his hips, pushing him until he rolls onto his stomach. He grabs him roughly around the waist, pulling up until Buck is on his knees, chest still buried in the comforter.
Before Buck can ask Eddie what he's doing, he feels Eddie's mouth against his own hole, and he's lost to the world. It feels so good, the way he spits and licks and kisses at him, his nerve endings on fire. He feels like he's never actually been alive until this moment, until Eddie Diaz put his mouth onto his skin like a starving man getting his first real meal, hands digging meanly into his pelvis to keep him still.
Buck can't keep still, is the problem. He's shaking uncontrollably, chest sinking deeper into the mattress, hands twisting into the comforter as if that could ground him at all. No, all that exists to Buck is Eddie's mouth and his own asshole.
And now Eddie's fingers, as they prod gently at the relaxed hole. "Grab the lube," he orders, one finger rubbing a smooth circle around his rim. "It's in the nightstand."
Buck's pretty sure his brain is fried, but he's so desperate to do anything Eddie wants that somehow his body finds a way to comply, crawling forward enough that he can open the drawer and search blindly for the lube, throwing the bottle back at Eddie once he has it.
Eddie wastes no time, pouring lube directly onto Buck's hole and pushing a finger in, curling it to press against Buck's walls. He whines helplessly, pushing his hips back, chasing the feeling. He wants Eddie to shove all his fingers in, to shove his hand in, his arm: to crawl entirely into Buck's body and fucking stay there, never to part from him again.
He settles for another finger, both stroking and searching until Buck jolts and mewls, collapsing as much as he can. Eddie chuckles and simply rubs firmly against Buck's prostate, sending jolts of pleasure through his body. Buck is starting to question whether he was actually struck by lightning, since whatever that was felt no where near as electric as this does.
"Eddie - Eds - please, c'mon," he whines, fingers digging into the nearby pillow. "I need you in me, baby. Come on, please, give me your dick, I need it!"
Eddie pulls his fingers out, dragging them out with a rough press upwards as he goes. Buck keens with it, groans unhappily once he's empty.
Eddie flips him over, settling himself between Buck's legs like he belongs there. Which, Buck thinks deliriously, he does. Eddie looks good there, looks good spreading Buck's legs to their limit, looks good slathering his own cock in lube, his eyes locked onto Buck's hole like he's planning on signing a lease and moving in.
Buck reaches out for him and grips at his forearms. "C'mon, baby," he gasps. "Get in me, please."
"Only because you asked so nicely," Eddie says, sounding anything but casual.
They both groan as he pushes in, Buck still tight around him. The slight burn feels so good; he almost wishes he bleeds with it, longing to bleed onto Eddie's cock, coat him with every fluid he's got.
Eddie fully seats himself, pelvis flush against Buck's ass. He leans over him, dropping down to press an almost chaste kiss against his lips. Buck feels overwhelmed with love, with the love he has for Eddie, with the love Eddie has for him. It's somehow monumental and utterly expected all at once.
When Eddie finally ruts his hips forward, grinding the head of his cock, against Buck's prostate, Buck lets out a whimper, moving his hands to grip at Eddie's ass. He opens his mouth as if he wants to speak, but nothing comes out besides a breathy gasp.
Eddie tries to laugh, but it comes out just as airless. Instead, he grinds his hips again, throws his head back with the pleasure before dropping forward, mouthing aimlessly at Buck's collarbone before fucking him in earnest.
It feels unlike anything Buck has ever felt before. He's never been so satisfied in his life than having a piece of Eddie inside of him, pushing into his guts and marking his claim. One of his hands goes to Buck's chest, squeezing in time with the rhythm of his thrusts.
"Your tits are bouncing with it," he says, almost in awe. "Fucking huge, baby."
Buck goes to speak, whines a few times before he manages to get his words out. "You want to see them covered in lace, baby?" he gasps, one of his hands going to cover Eddie's. "I'd buy some lingerie for you. Dress all pretty for you to take apart."
Eddie groans, his hips stuttering at the image. "I'd fucking love that. I'd do the same for you, throw on some lace panties and bend over, cover up my ass for you."
Buck whimpers, desperate for it. "Please, please, Eds. I need it."
"I'll give it to you," Eddie promises, sincerity dripping from it. "I'll give you anything."
"Give me your come, baby," Buck pleads, going back to grasping at Eddie's ass, pulling him flush and tight. "Come in me, please, I need you to cover me inside, baby. Come on, please, Eds!"
Eddie groans, his hips taking up a brutal pace before stuttering to a halt, gasps escaping his lips as his fills Buck with warmth.
Buck feels so satisfied with it, could be completely fine leaving it here, doesn't even feel like he needs to come with how incredible Eddie's come feels inside him. Eddie pulls out slowly before coating his hand in more lube, stroking roughly at Buck's cock until he fully covers it.
Buck goes to ask him what he's doing, but Eddie moves quickly, positioning himself over Buck's cock before slowly starting to sink down on it.
"Eds, what -" he babbles, overwhelmed, "- I didn't stretch you, you're going to be overstimulated -"
"I don't care -" Eddie hisses, sitting himself fully onto Buck's cock, the whole thing entirely consumed by his body. "I'm not wasting a fucking drop of your come. It belongs inside of me, and I'm going to make damn sure that's where it goes."
Buck's pretty sure the sound he's making in response aren't human, that he's ascended to some other plane of existence where people are made to handle this much pleasure.
Eddie starts riding him in earnest, his softening cock bouncing with the movement. His hands go right to Buck's chest, squeezing like he actually has tits, which make Buck feel insane in a way he can't describe.
Eddie leans down and bites at Buck's jaw, hips still moving with easy rhythm. "You gonna come in me, baby?" Eddie sighs in his ear, voice jumping when Buck's cock bumps against his prostate. "You wanna fill me up with that firehose? Come on, Buck. I need it."
Buck whines, grasping at Eddie's waist and thrusting up into him, chasing, chasing, chasing until he's cresting, falling over the edge and spilling into Eddie. It feels like it goes on forever, like every inch of him is filling up Eddie, marking him and staying there.
Eddie fully collapses against him, chests pressed together and his head tucked into the space where his neck meets his shoulder. They simply breathe there, Buck wrapping his arms tightly around Eddie as if he could keep him from leaving forever.
"Just to be clear," Eddie says, lips brushing against his throat, "this is an always thing for me, okay? Always loved you, always will love you. You're not allowed to leave, okay?"
Buck almost laughs. "As if I'd ever want to leave. It's you, Eddie. I'm literally never going to want anyone or anything else."
Eddie presses a gentle kiss against him. "Good, because I'm keeping you."
Buck smiles, satisfied. "It's nice to be kept."