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The Secrets We Hide from the Dark

Summary:

Kathleen didn't want to become a dragon rider, but she had no choice. To support her family she has to go and try to make it through all three years of the famous Riders Quadrant. She makes new friends, discovers feelings she's never felt before, and tries to keep a secret that if known to everyone, or rather, one specific person... would mean her death. Can she keep her secret? Will she live? This story is written in first person and present tense.

This is a fanfiction inspired by Rebecca Yarros’s novel Fourth Wing. Although it is not required, it is greatly recommended that you read Fourth Wing AND Iron Flame before reading this fanfiction. Most characters and the world are by Rebecca Yarros, but a couple of characters are created by me. There is no explicit swearing, and there are other words in place of swear words, as the characters are heavy swearers. Some things might not make sense, and others are made up and may clash with Onyx Storm. This fanfiction was written after Iron Flame came out, but Onyx Storm has yet to be published, so things might be wrong. Just as an FYI, there may be spoilers in the comments.

Nevertheless, enjoy!

Also available on Wattpad

Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Chapter Text

I slip my hand into my money pouch and drop the ten gold coins I had snatched from the bald man who had just passed me. I smile to myself. He is drunk, and probably won’t even notice ten of his coins are missing. His pouch was so full it had been tearing at the seams, and I have probably done him a favor by keeping from having to buy a new bag. At least for the day. Today is a good day, so far. I look around and scan the people around me. There is a food vendor ahead who is selling bread, and there are a couple of coins lying on the table, free for the taking. People should be smarter than that, but I benefit off of not-smart people, so who am I to complain? I start towards the table, and just when I am about to reach it, the vendor's head snaps up and grabs the coins. Dang it. I sigh. One can’t be lucky every day, I suppose. 

 

When I get home, the aroma of sweets and pastries drifts toward me, and I immediately recognize the scent of lemon cheesecake, my favorite. I grin. I toss my pouch of stolen goods onto the back counter and practically sprint to the back of Anna’s bakery, and according to the Basgiath Entrance Exam, I am very good at sprinting. 

 

“I hear you!” Anna, my adoptive mother, calls out, “And I want you to stop right there! It’s for Charlie’s birthday, not you and your insatiable appetite.” Her head pokes out from behind the door to the kitchen. “And don’t even think about stealing a bite of it.” 

 

“If I steal a piece, it will be more than just a bite,” I say. I give her a hug and a hard squeeze, and in the process, peek over her shoulder. I’m tall, but I’m not on the short side either. It is mostly Anna’s height that allows me to peek over and see the beautiful cake, topped with strawberries and whipped cream. It was mouthwatering. I have a feeling that the cake and toppings of choice aren’t entirely for Charlie, as he likes chocolate best, though he does love strawberries and whipped cream. 

 

Anna is one of the best bakers in Calldyr, there is no doubt about that. Maybe I’m biased, but even my fellow pickpocket friend Sienna agrees that her cooking is amazing. Okay, maybe Sienna is also biased, but Anna is still a good baker and cook. 

 

Even though Anna is a good baker, her business is falling apart. We have to depend on my findings for everyday needs, and the money Anna makes from her bakery goes towards the continual running of the bakery. Pickpocketing isn’t an honest living, but it’s better than starving on the streets and begging in Lower Calldyr. Even then, I feel that it isn’t enough. I know it isn’t enough. Anna tells me otherwise, but I know that I am the reason our family isn’t living in a better place, and why the bakery isn’t on a street in Upper Calldyr, catering to those in higher society and royalty. 

 

Anna isn’t my real mother, just as Sam isn’t my real father, and Charlie isn’t my real brother. My real mother and my younger half-brother died thirteen years ago when a strange man in purple had killed them. I would have died too, but my mother bought me time to run and I had taken off. I hadn’t even looked back. I am a coward and a fool, but one day, I’m going to get my revenge. I had a feeling it was going to be very soon. 

 

“Kathy!!” a voice calls out, and a not-very-strong ball of joy and happiness attempts to tackle me to the ground. 

 

“Charlie!” Anna laughs, “Be careful! You don’t want to get hurt on your birthday, do you?” 

 

“Rawr!” Charlie shouts, and I laugh. Charlie is turning eight years old today, and like every little boy his age, he wants to go to Basgiath and become a dragon rider one day. “Rawr! Me and my big dragon are coming after you!” I laugh, but it is restrained, and some of the light is drained from Anna’s eyes. Charlie is the only one who is excited, and even though it hurts everyone to see him so happy about dragon riders, Anna, Sam, and I had agreed to keep him happy. Charlie doesn’t need to know that my decision to go to Basgiath might have undesirable endings. 

 

I had made my decision to go to Basgiath and join the Riders Quadrant last year, when I had taken the entrance exam. We had been extremely desperate at the time, as the amount of gold I stole was less than before, Anna’s bakery was less popular, ingredient prices rose, and Charlie’s school fees had risen. It was all of our worst nightmares rolled into one. I had made my decision and although my parents and Sienna had tried to talk me out of it, I stood firm and they relented. My parents would and never will admit it, but we need the money, and when I leave, it will be one less mouth to feed, one less body to clothe, and one less person to worry about. 

 

After I successfully tackle Charlie to the ground, I pick him up and carry him to the small dining table. The table has been in Sam’s family for many generations, and you can see the names of Sam’s ancestors carved into the wood. Anna complains about it being hard to wash crumbs out of the small cracks, but I think that she secretly loved that her name was carved into it. I run my hand over my name. I’ma blood relation, but one day I woke up and found my name there. I had been twelve, a year after they had taken me in, and now I was with them permanently, carved into their family. 

 

“CAKE!” Charlie screams, and I struggle to hold him back. He kicks harder, and I adjust my grip on him. One year, Charlie had gotten so excited that he had knocked Anna over while she was carrying the cake, causing it to fall and splatter everywhere. I wouldn’t be surprised if the floor rated the cake five out of five stars. 

 

“Yes, cake,” Sam reaches over and ruffles Charlie’s brown hair. “Don’t get too excited, okay, Charles?” 

 

Charlie frowns and doesn’t say anything, but nods his head reluctantly. Anna places the cake onto the table, takes out the knife, and cuts it into four even portions. “First bite goes to Charlie,” Anna says. It is a tradition in our family that the special person the cake is dedicated to gets the first bite. “Kathleen, second?” Anna looks at me questioningly. 

 

“Um, sure,” I whisper. Today is supposed to be a happy day, but the recent mood isn’t as bright as it could have been. I leave for Basgiath in two days, and I will arrive after six days of traveling in a horse-drawn carriage. The part I am most worried about is the money. Not only is it six days straight of travel, but I also have to cross a mountain range, which is extra. Good thing I already have the money saved and ready. 

 

I start a sigh, but Anna gives me a warning look. I wasn’t going to ruin this happy day any further. So I paste on a smile, which isn’t completely fake, and take a bite of the cake. The flavor of lemon explodes in my mouth, and I let out a groan. 

 

“It’s amazing,” I say between mouthfuls. 

 

“Only ‘amazing’?” Anna says, raising her eyebrows. 

 

“Divine, fabulous, delicious, indescribable,” I list. 

 

“I don’t think a large vocabulary of adjectives that describe a well-baked cake is required for dragon riding,” Sam chuckles. 

 

“Excuse me? ‘Well-baked?’ Where are the times when you praised me every day for my cooking?” Anna puts her hands on her hips and pretends to be mad at us. My lips twitch, but I don’t let my smile show. Not yet. But then Charlie bursts out laughing, and Sam laughs, and soon everyone is laughing. 

 

I was going to miss that. The laughter, the joy, the happiness, and the feeling that I belonged. I was going to miss Anna and Sam and most definitely Charlie. I was going to miss Sienna and our pickpocketing days, seeing what strange treasures we had found. I was going to miss the cakes and smells of the bakery, the tastes of Anna’s new concoctions, and the sound of music drifting through the doors of Sam’s room. I was going to miss the hustle and bustle of living in the capital of Navarre, the shouts of vendors, and the squeals of little children. 

 

I wipe my tears away before they can become ones of sadness, and finish the rest of my cake. After everyone has finished, I trudge upstairs and start to pack.