Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Morning

Returning to Korea had been a difficult decision; however, it was something Seokjin had wanted for several years. He dreamed of spending afternoons with his mother, sharing a cup of tea while leisurely chatting about their days. He wanted to play golf with his father again, to listen to his old stories like when he was a child and they shared laughter. He yearned to visit his brother and nephews on weekends, to see them running around the garden, to feel the familial warmth he missed so much. He missed drinking with his friends, walking the streets where he grew up without the fear of getting lost, and, above all, he missed the food that only his country could offer him, the kind that evoked memories of simpler times. And, God, how he wished his daughters could experience that too. He wanted them to know the value of having a home, to grow up surrounded by their roots, wrapped in the love of both families. He wanted them to have what he and Taehyung once had.

But all that crumbled before his eyes in an instant. Everything he had built over the years, the life he had strived to create and protect, disintegrated just like that. And when the only option left was to start over, somewhere else, far from everything he had once loved, he couldn’t refuse. It wasn’t the first time he had failed to do so. For so long, he had given in to Taehyung's desires, whether it was changing countries, redecorating the house, or deciding where to spend vacations. He always ended up yielding, always.

Because how else could he make up for the damage he had done? How could he mend the irreparable if not by indulging everything his husband wanted?

And it worked. For a long time, that dynamic had been enough to keep their relationship afloat. With the arrival of the twins, Seokjin also didn’t have the luxury to stop and think too much about the situation. His days filled with diapers, childish smiles, and the exhaustion that only parenthood could bring. So, he decided to ignore what he felt, put a smile on his face, and follow Taehyung without thinking. It worked, or at least that’s what he told himself every time he questioned whether this was really the life he wanted.

But when Namjoon contacted him, asking if he wanted to work with him at Reminiscences, the company that had completely changed his life, it was as if reality hit him hard. And he remembered. Damn, he remembered everything, and that was the worst thing he could have done from the very beginning. But how the hell could he avoid it if it was in that place that he felt alive for the first time in so long?

He had spent a large part of his life simply existing, going along with the current others had made for him, hoping that one day it would lead him to a brighter destination, one that aligned with what he had once dreamed of. He told himself hundreds of times that things would get better while he cried, not understanding why, if he had everything, he felt so miserable.

Reminiscences was the place that changed the course of his existence.

And the memories of that city, in that old building, brought a warmth to his chest, so familiar and so intense, something within him awoke. It wasn’t just nostalgia; it was much deeper. It was as if the void he had felt for years, that gap he tried to fill with forced smiles and endless routines, began to fill with something greater, something that cradled his soul with devastating tenderness, a burning fire he could not ignore.

And he let himself be consumed. Because, even though the flames hurt, even though he knew he was burning everything he had rebuilt, that pain made him feel alive in a profoundly devastating way, and in the end, all that remained were mere ashes scattered to the wind.

He spent entire nights tossing and turning in bed, unable to find rest, his mind trapped in a whirlwind of memories that refused to fade. He looked at the darkness through the window, where the moon, distant and lonely, hung in the sky, always out of reach. He silently begged it to let him dream of that lost time, to return to him, if only for one night, the light of the stars that had once guided him. He desperately pleaded for it to hang the bright orbs just as they were before they fell from the sky and turned into crystalline tears he could never erase.

Those memories haunted him, clinging to him like shadows that couldn’t be shaken off. They were part of him, invisible marks he had tried to ignore, but they remained, pulsating beneath the surface. He knew he couldn’t leave them behind, that no matter how hard he tried to push them away, those memories were part of who he was. He carried them with him, like scars etched on his skin, deep and permanent, constantly reminding him of what he had been and what he would never be again.

So, after so many years, he decided he wanted to go back. He wanted to return to Korea. He wanted his old life back, the one where he too had a place, where he didn’t just exist to be Taehyung’s partner.

Finally, he told him.

The words came out broken and hesitant, but clear enough for Taehyung to understand their meaning instantly. The reaction was immediate, explosive. The argument erupted like a storm contained for too long. Seokjin had never seen him so furious, so hurt. It was as if every word spoken had been a direct stab to his husband’s heart.

The rain lashed against the windows like it wanted to join the disaster unfolding inside the room. Taehyung, fists clenched and veins bulging in his neck, looked ready to explode. His eyes, two dark abysses, pierced Seokjin, who refused to look away.

“Have you lost your mind?” he roared, his voice hoarse and filled with resentment. The words escaped his lips like poisoned arrows, hurting them both.

“It’s just a possibility,” Seokjin replied, trying not to raise his voice, hoping to prevent things from getting worse. “I want to go back home.”

“The home you destroyed so many years ago!” Taehyung spat, his voice laced with bitterness.

The fight was so intense that his husband decided to leave for a hotel, leaving the house empty of his presence for days. Every morning he returned early, before the girls woke up, trying to maintain the illusion of normalcy. But the oldest knew that this distance, this void between them, was impossible to ignore.

He understood, damn it, of course he understood.

And that terrified him more than he was willing to admit. He feared what his partner might say when he returned completely. If he refused, there was nothing left but to resign himself to the reality that his life, as he knew it, would continue unchanged. But if he accepted... If, for some reason, Taehyung decided to follow him to Korea, then Seokjin couldn’t afford any mistakes.

Any misstep, any misunderstanding, and the next thing he would see would be divorce papers.

Fuck.

Taehyung had already warned him before, and now, fuck, Seokjin had gone and made the same stupid mistake from that time. He had acted like a hormonal teenager, acting thoughtlessly instead of being the family man he should have been. A deep sigh escaped his lips as he rested his forehead on the steering wheel, the cold leather barely easing the tension that consumed him.

The dull pain in his lower back vividly reminded him of what had happened the night before. Embarrassment hit him, and he wished he could slap himself for being such an idiot. How had he let it all get to this point? How could he have been so reckless?

Now, sitting alone in the car, he contemplated whether entering the house was even an option. His relationship with Taehyung hung by such a fragile thread that it seemed a whisper would be enough to break it. Regret pierced his chest, but worst of all was not the fear of his husband asking for a divorce. No, that was something that probably should have happened years ago, when the cracks in their relationship began to be impossible to ignore.

His true fear wasn’t losing his husband; his greatest terror was the possibility of losing his daughters. He knew the guy better than anyone, and although others saw him as a sweet and loving man, which he generally was, Seokjin knew the truth. Taehyung, when he wanted to be, could be terrifying. He had the power, the resources, and enough determination to ensure his daughters never saw their father again if he decided so.

And that single idea was what kept him motionless, paralyzed by fear.

The phone vibrated in the seat, breaking the heavy silence that had filled the car. Seokjin jumped, his heart already racing from the thoughts suffocating him. He glanced quickly at the screen. It was a message from Taehyung.

“Are you going to be home soon?”

The man felt his hands tremble slightly as he took the phone. The weight of what had just happened still hung over his shoulders like a burden he couldn’t shake off. He took a deep breath, trying to calm himself as he began to write a reply.

“I’m parking the car.”

He hit send and dropped the phone onto his lap. Almost immediately, another vibration. Taehyung had replied.

“Okay, love. Don’t take long. The girls missed you all night… and so did I.”

The man’s words pierced Seokjin’s heart with the softness of a dagger. He closed his eyes for a moment, pressing his lips together, fighting against the lump in his throat. Reality was catching up with him relentlessly.

The girls. His husband. Everything he had left behind during the night.

With a heavy sigh, Seokjin got out of the car and walked toward the entrance of his house. The echo of the last moments in the car still resonated in his mind, but upon seeing the door in front of him, he forced himself to concentrate on what was to come. He took out the keys and turned them in the lock, opening the door to be greeted by the sound of paws scampering and a small furry figure that made him smile.

“Yeontan,” he murmured, bending down to pet the puppy who was wagging its tail with excitement, bouncing joyfully. As his fingers ran through the soft fur of the dog, the memories of the night seemed to fade, at least for a moment.

“Daddy!” Tae-mi’s voice echoed from the living room, filling the house with her childlike energy. Yeontan, always attentive, ran toward his daughter, who was still wearing her green pajamas, with her messy hair and that frown she had clearly inherited from her other father.

“Tan, I told you to wait. Now you ruined the surprise,” the girl pouted, crossing her arms like a little adult.

“Surprise?” Seokjin asked with a gentle smile as he approached his daughter, lifting her into his arms with an ease that only familiarity and affection could grant. Tae-mi, delighted to be in his arms, wrapped her small, chubby arms around him, planting sweet kisses on his cheek.

“Yes!” she exclaimed, her eyes shining with excitement. “Yesterday was Valentine’s Day, and since you couldn’t be here, we wanted to celebrate it with you today.”

The older man's heart tightened at those words. Seeing his daughter with that square smile, so pure and radiant, was like a balm for his wounded soul. It lit up everything around her, making, for a brief moment, all the weight on his chest feel lighter and breathing easier.

“Aren’t my girls just too adorable?” Taehyung’s voice interrupted the moment, catching both of their attention. His presence filled the doorway, dressed casually, with clothes splattered with what appeared to be food remnants and an apron hanging from him in a total mess. In his arms, Su-ji was sleeping soundly, her pink pajamas disheveled and her hair dusted with white flour spots.

Seokjin smiled at the scene, although a part of him couldn’t help but feel a pang of guilt. “Definitely, they are the most adorable girls in the world,” he murmured, gently stroking Tae-mi’s hair. But the weight in his chest remained, reminding him of how fragile that moment was, how fleeting the calm before the storms returned. “Were you in the kitchen?”

He didn’t need to enter the place to know that the cleanliness that usually characterized it was probably nonexistent at that moment. No matter how hard his husband tried, Taehyung’s cooking skills left much to be desired. He had checked that hundreds of times in their early months living together, when the fire alarm had gone off at least seven times, and hospital visits for food poisoning almost equaled that number. Not to mention the multiple cuts on Taehyung’s hands, a result of his clumsiness among pots and knives.

“That’s right,” the man replied with a proud smile, confirming Seokjin’s fears. “We made you some cookies and—”

“Appa!” Tae-mi exclaimed in frustration, interrupting her father. “You weren’t supposed to tell him! You and Tan can’t keep secrets!”

“Oh, I’m sorry, sweetheart,” Taehyung leaned down to place a kiss on the little girl’s head, trying to smooth over the situation. “But don’t worry, there are more surprises, right?”

“Yes!” Tae-mi responded with renewed enthusiasm, quickly forgetting her father’s slip.

At that moment, a sleepy voice interrupted the commotion. “Daddy?” Su-ji’s soft tone made itself known, having woken up from her sister’s shouts. The little girl yawned as she rubbed her eyes, still half-asleep.

“Hello, my love,” Seokjin greeted her with a warm smile, bending down to kiss her cheek. “Did your sister wake you?”

The girl nodded slowly, raising her arms in a clear request to be held.

“Sweetheart, I don’t think Daddy can carry you. He has Tae-mi,” the man pointed out, looking at his husband with an understanding gaze.

Su-ji pouted, which went straight to the older man’s heart. “Of course I can,” he declared with determination. “I’m not that old.”

Taehyung let out a chuckle. “Okay, if you say so. But I don’t want to hear you complaining about back pain tonight,” he replied as he helped arrange both girls in Seokjin’s arms.

Seokjin barely managed to hold back a smile as he embraced his two daughters, ignoring the growing tension in his lower back. He knew that the calm was temporary, a fleeting breath before the storm inevitably returned. Still, he chose to savor that moment, as fragile as the balance he was trying to maintain.

“I’m going to take a picture,” the younger one announced, positioning himself in front of them with a look that sparkled under the soft sunlight filtering through the window. His eyes, a warm brown, seemed to melt like honey, radiating that sweetness that used to envelop Seokjin, making him feel safe. There was something in that gaze, in the silent love it conveyed, that almost made him want to believe that everything was okay, that there was still a future where they could both find peace.

But deep within himself, Seokjin knew that same gaze, so sweet and loving, could cloud over at any moment, transforming into storms capable of erasing any trace of warmth. He had seen it before, he had felt it. He knew how the tempest could take control of his husband, changing everything around him in the blink of an eye. Sweet words could turn into poison, caresses into distant and cold touches. He had lived that duality, that ebb and flow between the warmth that surrounded him and the cold that stripped him of everything that made him feel safe.

“Say cheese,” Taehyung said with a smile, focusing the camera on them.

With a smile that didn’t reach his eyes, Seokjin did what he had to do. He smiled, or at least he tried to, forcing his lips to curve into an expression of happiness that he no longer felt. He pretended, as he had done so many times before. He pretended that everything was fine, that the life he had still belonged to him.

The girls laughed carefree, oblivious to the tension floating in the air, and the older man held the smile just a little longer, enough for the click of the camera to capture what seemed like a moment of happiness.

“Done,” the younger one said, pulling away the phone. “Girls, why don’t you go tidy up your rooms while I greet your father?”

The twins nodded eagerly, and as Seokjin carefully set them down, their small steps echoed on the floor as they walked away. Once they were out of sight, Taehyung stepped closer without hesitation. He wrapped his arms around the man’s waist and kissed him urgently.

“I missed you so much,” the man murmured between kisses, his lips brushing against Seokjin’s as he spoke, with a softness that burned him more than anything else. He paused just long enough to look him in the eyes, and in that instant, the older man saw him with overwhelming clarity: the love was there, as clear and deep as it had always been, perhaps more so, as if the years and the pain had only strengthened it.

Taehyung had that kind of gaze that could say everything without words, a mixture of affection, desire, and a desperate need to keep him by his side, the same since the day their lives first crossed. That gaze, Seokjin thought, hadn’t changed at all; it was still as intense, as devastating.

The older man swallowed hard, feeling his husband’s warmth enveloping him, but a part of him remained still, trapped in that re-opening crack he couldn’t ignore. Still, in that moment, he decided to hold on to the love he saw in those bright eyes.

“I missed you too,” he responded in a whisper, his words barely audible, as if he feared that by saying them aloud, everything would crumble.

Taehyung smiled softly, leaning in toward him, burying his face in his neck, where Seokjin’s familiar scent had always comforted him. He inhaled deeply, as if that simple gesture could silence all the doubts hiding in his mind.

“Did you shower before coming?” he suddenly asked, his voice laced with calm.

Seokjin tensed almost immediately, his muscles tightening under his husband’s touch. “Yes,” he replied, his voice trembling.

The silence became palpable, thick as fog. “In one of your patients’ showers?”

The older man’s blood ran cold instantly. “She told us it was fine from the start,” he lied, hoping his voice wouldn’t betray the knot of anxiety forming in his throat.

“Really?” Taehyung asked, lifting his head from Seokjin’s neck, his tone soft but laden with something Seokjin couldn’t quite decipher.

“Yes, of course,” he insisted, holding firm to his lie. “She asked how long the procedure would take and then gave us permission. It was no problem.”

His husband watched him in silence for a few seconds that felt eternal, then slowly nodded. “Oh, well,” he finally said, his tone so calm that it felt unsettling. Taehyung observed him for another moment with those eyes that seemed to see beyond the surface, but then he broke into a smile. “I told my sister if she could watch the girls tonight, so we can be just the two of us and celebrate our way,” he said casually, but with a glimmer in his eyes that Seokjin knew well. “What do you think?”

Images of the marks on his body flashed through his mind, and cold terror settled in his chest. If Taehyung saw them, there would be no need to say anything. He would know what had happened. And that, Seokjin couldn’t allow, not at that moment.

“Why don’t we wait for another day?” he suggested, softly caressing his husband’s arms, trying to distract him. “We could spend this weekend just with the girls, enjoy some family time, and next... next weekend can be just for the two of us. Doesn’t that sound better?”

Taehyung looked at him with an eyebrow slightly raised, as if he were evaluating his words, but the smile never left his face. “Alright, if that’s what you want,” he finally conceded, though his tone carried an almost imperceptible note of doubt. However, there were no more questions. Instead, the younger one reclaimed his lips with a kiss filled with intensity, tightening his hold around his waist, as if that gesture could fuse him into his embrace and erase any distance that had formed between them.

“The... the girls could come back at any moment,” Seokjin tried to say between kisses, his voice breaking as Taehyung began to slide his fingers along the edge of his jeans, seeking contact beneath his shirt.

“I know,” the man murmured against his ear, his hot breath sending a shiver over his skin. Then, he pressed his pelvis against him, making the hardness between his legs evident. "But I need you so much. I can never get enough of you, love."

“Tae…” 

“Let's go to the bathroom.” And before Seokjin could respond, his husband was already directing him to the place, where, upon arriving, he locked the door and cornered him against the wall. “Do you remember when we used to do this in the college art room?”

Seokjin's ears turned red as he remembered those memories. “Yes..”

“Why don't we recreate it?”

Seconds later, with agile movements, his husband's pants fell to his ankles, Seokjin's eyes widened at the sight of the man's erect member, the veins standing out in relief against the smooth skin. The air was thick with tension as the older man's hands instinctively reached out to touch the warm flesh, his fingers wrapping around the base of Taehyung's cock. His eyes closed, a low moan escaping his lips as Seokjin's thumb brushed over the sensitive head and then returned to the base, lightly squeezing the member, his hips involuntarily pushing against his hand, seeking more contact. 

“Honey, please…” he said in a pleading voice as Seokjin continued the torturous back and forth, “let me use your pretty mouth.”

Seokjin's eyes locked onto Taehyung's, as if he was contemplating the man's words. The silence between them seemed to lengthen, becoming almost tangible. His fingers, slightly trembling, still held his husband's member firmly, feeling its hardness beneath the skin. After a few more seconds, he knelt down, opening his mouth for his husband to take it.

The younger's gaze burned with desire as he guided his cock into Seokjin's waiting mouth, the head passing through the lips with a soft pop. The older's tongue instinctively wrapped around the shaft, tracing the veins as he began to suck gently, feeling the strong taste flood his taste buds. His breathing was irregular, barely restrained, and his thoughts were tangled in Taehyung's urgency.

Taehyung’s hips jerked forward, his hands coming to rest on his husband’s head, holding him in place as he began to thrust gently, a sign that he would be the one in control. Seokjin’s hands instinctively reached out to grip the man’s hips, steadying him as he took in more of his length. Taehyung’s thrusts became more confident, his hips moving in a steady rhythm as he watched his husband’s pink lips wrap fervently around his cock.

Seokjin’s eyes closed as he focused on the feeling of Taehyung’s length sliding in and out of his mouth. He savored the way the member was able to fill him up, giving him that choking feeling he loved so much as it began to hit the back of his throat. Saliva pooled in his mouth and mixed with the precum, creating a slick surface that made the movement of his mouth over Taehyung’s cock all the more pleasurable.

Taehyung’s eyes locked onto Seokjin’s face, his gaze burning with need as he asked, “Can you take me all the way?” His breathing became ragged and his thrusts became more urgent.

The older man moaned in response, trying to relax his jaw and regulate his breathing. He felt his mouth stretch to accommodate Taehyung’s length, his lips beginning to fill with the fluids that were starting to spill down to his chin. The man’s hips moved forward, Seokjin’s head bobbing up and down, his mouth taking in more of his husband’s length until he was able to take it all the way down his throat, his eyes filling with tears as he struggled to breathe through his nose, his lungs burning from the lack of oxygen. But he was determined to take Taehyung all the way, to feel his husband’s cock throbbing in his throat. He relaxed his jaw, letting his mouth fall open, his cock sliding deeper into the older man’s mouth.

Taehyung’s hands caressed Seokjin’s cheeks, his fingers tracing the curves of his face as he looked up at his husband. “Yes, baby, that’s it,” he whispered, his voice husky with desire. “You’re doing so well, Seokjin. I can feel how deep you’re taking me, baby.”

The younger man's climax grew with each thrust. His hands tightened around the older man's hair, fingers gripping the strands as he looked at Seokjin's lips wrapped around his cock. A shiver ran down his spine, heat enveloping his member as Seokjin's soft tongue caressed his length with fervor. His balls tensed.

"Baby, I'm gonna cum," Taehyung warned, voice tight.

He gave a few more thrusts until he exploded with a loud moan. Seokjin's throat filled with the thick, warm, salty liquid. The man struggled to swallow, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down as he tried to take it all in. The salty taste exploded on his tongue, and he could feel the remnants of Taehyung's climax dripping down the back of his throat. He gagged a little, but his husband's gentle hands on his cheeks calmed him, urging him to take his cum.

As Taehyung slowly pulled out, his cock covered in saliva and cum, Seokjin's eyes closed and his chest heaved with the effort. The air was thick with the smell of sex and sweat, and the man's eyes shone with satisfaction as he looked at his husband. With his left hand, he held the older man's hair from the back of his head, gripping it in a fist, while with the other he stroked his member until the remnants of the orgasm were left on the older man's flushed face.

The image was exquisite. His lips, swollen, wet, and tinted a deep crimson. His skin, flushed in a pinkish hue that started at his cheeks and spread down his neck, covered in the remnants of his cum. Small tears still traced their path, glistening on his cheeks.

Taehyung felt heat rush through his body at the sight, his cock almost filling up instantly, but he knew time wasn't on his side. Carefully, he helped his husband to his feet and went in search of some toilet paper. He moistened it with water and began to wipe it gently, as if each touch was a caress meant for a precious jewel.

"You did amazing," the man said with a satisfied smile, as he caressed Seokjin's face tenderly. His gaze radiated genuine affection.

Seokjin, exhausted, dropped his head onto Taehyung's shoulder, sighing. "Yeah, but now I remember why I don't do it as often. My jaw fucking hurts like shit"

A soft laugh escaped Taehyung's lips, who placed a kiss on his husband's head. "We can always train you again."

"Train me?" Seokjin raised an eyebrow, pulling away slightly to look at the boy's face curiously.

“You know, like those times when you just held me in your mouth… you seemed to enjoy it quite a bit,” the younger man teased, smiling knowingly. “You could do it for hours and you’d complain when…”

“Stop it!” he exclaimed in embarrassment. “Yes, I remember, but the circumstances were different, we don’t have time for that now.”

“Oh, next weekend I’ll make sure we have it, don’t worry,” Taehyung murmured in a seductive tone, as he pulled him in for a soft kiss. Between his lips, he added in a whisper, “Do you want me to do it for you too?” As he said it, he felt hardness from his husband.

Seokjin shook his head, letting out a tired smile. “I know how that will end,” he said in an amused, but firm tone. “So, why don’t you clean yourself up and go with the girls? They’ve been quiet for quite some time, and that’s never a good sign.”

His husband sighed, knowing the man was right, even though the temptation still lingered. "Yes, it’s better if I check on them. Last time, Yeontan’s fur took almost four months to grow back decently after the impromptu haircut they gave him." He quickly washed his hands, recalling the chaos. "I don’t understand how they did it. I left for exactly three minutes for their snacks, and when I came back, the first thing I saw was Tae-Mi with scissors, while poor Yeontan was being held by Su-Jin."

Seokjin chuckled, leaning against the wall. "At least you got back before they started on their own hair, not like the last time."

Taehyung let out a laugh as he dried his hands with a towel. "Don’t remind me. Tae-Mi had already cut her bangs, and Su-Jin was so focused on the TV that she didn’t even notice her sister had snipped off a few strands." He shook his head with a smile.

The older man smiled tenderly, watching as his husband prepared to leave. "They’re creative, that can’t be denied. Although you were lucky they didn’t find the permanent markers this time."

Taehyung paused at the door and turned to look at him, his eyes sparkling with amusement. "Don’t mention the markers, or I’ll have a panic attack before I even leave the room." He moved closer to the man and gave him a gentle kiss, savoring the remnants of their previous intimacy. "Take a rest. I’ll handle the little artists this time."

Seokjin nodded, grateful. "I’ll be out in a few minutes."

As Seokjin listened to his husband calling the girls with a hint of concern, he sighed and turned on the faucet. The cold water helped him relax, gradually making his erection fade until he felt decent enough to step out. He dried himself quickly and headed to the kitchen, where he was greeted by an unexpected sight.

Yeontan was sitting on the floor, wearing his pink harness and a matching balloon tied to him. In large letters, the balloon read "Happy Valentine’s Day," and below that, in messy, shaky handwriting, it said "Dad." Seokjin's heart filled with an indescribable warmth. Smiling, he crouched down and carefully untied the balloon, noticing a folded piece of paper at the end of the string.

With his heart racing, he opened it to read:

"Dad, happy Valentine’s Day.  

We know you weren’t here, but it didn’t feel right to celebrate without you.  

We love you so much."

The words were written in chaotic handwriting, and some characters were hard to decipher, but that only made his eyes fill with tears even faster. It was the perfect imperfection of a message full of love.

Further down on the paper, there was a drawing overflowing with innocence and tenderness. Five figures were sketched in trembling lines: two taller ones holding hands with two smaller figures, while a colorful ball, presumably Yeontan, rested at their feet. The landscape, like something out of a children's story, was filled with green trees with lush canopies, and a sun literally smiled from the corner of the paper.

Seokjin couldn’t help but let out a small laugh. His eyes misted as he gazed at the simple drawing, full of vibrant, uneven colors but overflowing with pure love. An indescribable warmth enveloped him, and in that moment, holding the paper close to his chest, he felt that for that moment, everything would be alright.

With determination, he promised himself that at least for those days, he would fully dedicate himself to loving his family. He wanted to soak up every moment, savor the laughter of his daughters and the warmth of shared hugs, leaving no room for the darkness that would eventually creep in. He tried to bury deep in his mind that constant voice whispering about how he had ruined everything.

At least for a moment. He just wanted to be present in that palpable love that enveloped him.  

“Dad!” Su-jin's sweet voice pulled him from his thoughts. His daughter ran toward him, a small bag in her tiny hand. “This is my gift for you,” she said with shining eyes as she extended it to him.  

Seokjin, unable to contain his emotion, knelt down to be at his daughter's level, wrapping her in a tight hug. His arms held her so tightly that it felt as if they wanted to protect that moment forever. “I love you so much,” he murmured, his voice trembling with joy, “you make me the happiest man in the world.” Su-jin smiled against his shoulder, her little heart beating in sync with his.  

“I made you a gift too!” exclaimed Tae-mi with a radiant smile, running toward them with all the energy her little legs could muster. In her hands, she held a soft, dark brown stuffed animal, her eyes sparkling with excitement. “It’s Daddy Bear,” she said, bringing the toy closer to the man, “it’s you.”  

With his other arm, without thinking, he pulled Tae-mi toward him, enveloping his youngest daughter in a warm embrace as her gentle laughter mingled with her sister’s. He filled her with kisses, just like he did with Su-jin, enjoying every giggle he elicited from his little ones, allowing paternal love to envelop him completely.  

“Thank you, Tae-mi,” he said softly, stroking the head of his little girl. “Daddy Bear is perfect, just like you.”  

Seokjin gently separated from his daughters, his arms still feeling the warmth of their little bodies, while he delicately took the gifts. With a curious smile, he opened the small bag that Su-jin had given him, revealing its contents: two handmade bracelets. The larger one, made of pink pearls, had small letters forming “Daddy Bear” and tiny animal figures that seemed to dance among the beads. It was simple but charming, filled with that childlike purity that moved him to the core. 

The second bracelet, smaller and in a vibrant purple color, was inscribed with “Big Sister Bear,” a title that Su-jin wore proudly.  

His eyes traveled to Tae-mi’s doll, which was adorned with a similar blue bracelet and seemed to say “Little Sister Bear.”  

Seokjin felt a lump in his throat as he gazed at the bracelets. It was such a simple gesture, but at that moment, it felt like the most beautiful gift he had ever received. He held them between his fingers, with the care of someone guarding something sacred, as his eyes returned to the expectant faces of his daughters. “They’re perfect,” he murmured, his words heavy with love. “Thank you, my little bears.” 

Now his gaze fell on the stuffed bear that Tae-mi had given him. It was soft to the touch, with fluffy fur that invited hugs, and a cute bow adorned its head, giving it a charming touch. Seokjin held it in his hands as if he had just received an invaluable treasure, observing every detail with a look of feigned amazement. Then, in a theatrical movement, he hugged it tightly, pressing it against his chest like the bear was the most precious thing in the world.  

The laughter of his daughters instantly resonated, filling the room with joy. Tae-mi and Su-jin looked at him with bright eyes, fascinated by their father's reaction.  

“I see I can’t compete with them,” Taehyung said playfully as he approached with a tray of freshly baked cookies and a small velvet box to the side.  

Seokjin looked up, still holding the stuffed bear, and smiled conspiratorially. “No, you can’t,” he replied, feigning seriousness. “This year they’ve beaten you by a lot.” 

The younger man let out a soft laugh as he set the tray on the table, taking the small box in his hands. “They’ve done that since they were born,” he said, his voice filled with affection.  

The man watched him for a moment, his eyes full of gratitude. 

He knew that each of those little moments was largely thanks to Taehyung, to the life they had built together. “Well,” he murmured as his fingers brushed over the “Daddy Bear” bracelet, “if you want to be fair, they were your best gift to me.”  

Taehyung smiled, his eyes softening as he leaned toward Seokjin and gave him a gentle kiss on the forehead. “The best gift we’ve made together,” he murmured, his voice infused with tenderness. Around them, their daughters, completely unaware of the intimacy of the moment, played and laughed with Yeontan, who ran back and forth, barking joyfully.

“However,” he continued with a glint of excitement in his eyes, “I couldn’t be left behind.” Slowly, he lifted the small velvet box and opened it in front of Seokjin, revealing a delicate rose gold chain. Hanging from the fine necklace was a small, elegant letter T. 

Seokjin looked at him, surprised, his heart racing at the sight of the detail. “It’s beautiful,” he whispered, touching the chain with the tips of his fingers.  

“I have a matching one too,” Taehyung added, carefully pulling out the necklace he wore under his shirt, revealing the same chain but with a small S hanging from it. “That way we’ll always be connected.”  

The man felt something warm and comforting fill him completely, as if the weight of everything he had done in the past melted away in that small gesture of love. Without saying another word, he leaned in and kissed him gently, wrapping his arms around Taehyung’s neck, merging into the warmth of his husband.  

“I love you,” he whispered, his voice barely an echo between them. In that moment, time seemed to stand still, and Seokjin wished, for the first time in a long time, that those words could continue to feel as real, as pure as they had in those distant days of college. He remembered the carefree moments, the laughter shared, and the promises made under a starlit sky on the rooftop of an abandoned building, where the outside world faded away and it was just the two of them.  

Looking at Taehyung, he felt that, perhaps, he could love him again.

Sunset

The week passed faster than Seokjin had anticipated. That Monday, the weight of guilt and shame had overwhelmed him so much that he thought he wouldn't be able to go to work and face Jungkook. But reality, as often happens, was different from his expectations. When they finally crossed paths in the hallways, the greeting was distant, formal, barely a word exchanged before each went their separate way. Jungkook avoided looking him in the eyes, and Seokjin, for his part, did the same. The tension was palpable, but it was hidden under a facade of indifference that hurt more than he dared admit.  

They no longer shared lunch, nor did he accompany him to the bus stop or stop by to say "good morning." The moments that once existed between them seemed to have vanished completely, almost as if they'd been erased in the blink of an eye. Jungkook didn't ask for his help anymore, not even for the move they had talked about just a few days before. In the end, Jimin and other friends had handled everything for him, leaving Seokjin out of the equation, like an outsider in the life of the boy who had occupied his thoughts so intensely.  

The atmosphere between them had grown cold, and the days passed in a silent, monotonous routine, where the only constant was the emptiness Seokjin now felt when thinking about Jungkook. He wanted to remain unaffected, wished to be stronger, but the reality was that the distance was consuming him slowly. He kept telling himself that he was trying, that he was doing the right thing. 

To chase those thoughts away, he clung to memories of the weekend with his family. It was perfect. His daughters' eyes, so full of light and childhood dreams; the disasters in the kitchen as they tried to make breakfast together; the afternoons at the park with their pet, running after the laughter of the little ones; and, of course, the warmth of Taehyung’s arms around his waist at night. Those moments should have been enough for him, he told himself again and again.  

They should be enough.   

But no matter how hard he tried, the shadow of Jungkook still lurked in the corners of his mind like a ghost. He knew he shouldn't get closer. He had made a mistake, but there was still time to correct his path. He just had to stick to his own limits, respect the boundaries he had set, though they seemed increasingly fragile.  

And, above all, Taehyung could never find out what had happened between him and Jungkook. Because as long as he followed his own code, he could keep everything in place, intact on the surface, even if inside he was cracking, and each small piece of his heart broke again, leaving only dust and sharp fragments that buried themselves deep in his chest.  

Those fragments followed him with every step.  

He could feel them every time he breathed, as if the air filling his lungs put pressure on the invisible wounds that cut him. Every time he laughed with his family, every smile he forced, was a reminder of the crack growing inside him. And at night, when the silence grew heavier, the pieces sank deeply, stabbing without mercy, reminding him of what he'd lost, what he had done. 

In his chest, a few centimeters to the left, he was bleeding. 

In fact, he had been for a long time, so much so that he had learned to live with that slow and relentless drip that he doubted would ever stop. He didn't believe there was a cure for the pain of knowing that, in some corner of his life, he had chosen the wrong path. Each heartbeat was a reminder of what he could never recover. Perhaps, in his darkest moments, he thought, this was what he deserved. Maybe that slow bleeding was the price he had to pay for the decisions he'd made, for the promises he'd broken, and for the secrets he kept.

And yet, he kept walking, maintaining that smile, trying to convince everyone, and himself, that everything was fine. Because, despite the constant hemorrhage in his chest, Seokjin wasn't ready to let everything fall apart. Not yet.  

Taehyung's deep voice abruptly pulled him out of his thoughts, causing his heart to skip a beat.  

"What do you think?" the man asked, with a satisfied smile on his lips. 

"What?" Seokjin replied, somewhat dazed, having not paid attention to the previous conversation.  

"The view," Taehyung repeated, gesturing broadly at the landscape before them. "It's the best hotel in Geoje."  

The older man followed the direction of his hand and observed what unfolded before his eyes. The vast sea, a deep blue, stretched between mountains covered with green trees, while gentle waves caressed the white sand of the beach. A few boats lazily bobbed on the water, adding a touch of tranquility to the scene

"It's beautiful," he murmured, letting his gaze drift toward the horizon.  

"It is," his husband confirmed with a proud smile. "You said you wanted to go somewhere peaceful, so I thought it’d be the best option to come here." As he spoke, he moved toward the bed and began unpacking, placing his suitcase on the mattress. "It's not a busy season, which means we’ll have the beach to ourselves, as well as the restaurants and bars."  

Seokjin watched as the young man meticulously pulled out shirts and pants, folding them carefully. There was something comforting about that routine. 

Taehyung continued, with the same calmness, "Besides, I made a few reservations so we can go fishing, like you like."  

A light smile appeared on Seokjin's lips. "I thought you hated it."

"I don't hate it," Taehyung replied, shrugging. "But I do find it a bit boring. Still, it's my way of compensating for all the things I’ll do to you during these days."  

The man's ears turned red at the implication. "God... you never get tired, do you?"  

"I think after all this time, you already know the answer," his partner said with that mischievous smile that always disarmed him.  

Seokjin rolled his eyes, feigning annoyance, before throwing a pillow at Taehyung. "I'm going to take a bath..."  

"I love how you're already getting ready."  

"So we can go to dinner!" he finished, raising his voice in warning. 

"Well, yes, for that too," Taehyung conceded, laughing softly.  

With a huff, Seokjin headed to the bathroom, grabbing a clean change of clothes and a couple of towels before disappearing behind the door. Inside, his eyes were met with a spacious bathroom: a jacuzzi spread out in front of the window that offered a panoramic view of the sea and the setting sun on the horizon, a generously sized shower occupied the left side, and the marble sink, accompanied by a large mirror, reflected nearly the entire room.  

Seokjin couldn’t help but think how extravagant the place was.

Taehyung had always been a lover of luxuries. It wasn’t a new trait, but what set him apart from others was that, despite enjoying the best, he never did so at anyone else’s expense. There was always an innate kindness in his behavior, a willingness to help, no matter the situation. 

As these thoughts crossed his mind, Seokjin began to undress. One by one, the clothes fell to the floor until he finally stepped into the shower. The hot water began to run over his body, relaxing his tense muscles after the long car trip. He closed his eyes and allowed the warmth to envelop him, washing away, if only for a moment, the weight of the worries he carried inside.  

He soon finished his bath and emerged from the steam, drying his body as the hunger began to set in. Wrapping a towel around his waist, he grabbed another to dry his hair while searching for his boxers, which seemed to have mysteriously disappeared.  

"Taehyung, can you bring me some boxers, please!?" he shouted, not bothering to keep his voice down. Moments later, his husband appeared at the bathroom door with the garment in hand, a playful smile on his lips.

"Thanks, darling," he murmured, relieved.  

The younger man walked up to him with deliberate steps and placed a soft kiss on his still-damp shoulder, sliding his tongue over his skin as if savoring the water droplets left behind. "Want me to help?" he whispered against his skin.  

Seokjin shook his head with a slight smile. "You should shower too."  

Taehyung let out a soft huff but didn't respond. Instead, he calmly began to undress. One by one, he unbuttoned his shirt, revealing the impressive physique he had acquired during his time in the military. With each movement, the muscles under his smooth, tanned skin flexed, inevitably drawing Seokjin's gaze. 

His eyes roamed over the man standing in front of him, taking in the sight of Taehyung's chiseled physique. From his broad shoulders to the defined "V" at his hips, every inch of him seemed sculpted to perfection. Seokjin's gaze lingered on the faint scars that crisscrossed Taehyung's torso, evidence of his time in the military. A shiver ran down Seokjin's spine when Taehyung's eyes met his, a spark of heat igniting in their depths.

"You can touch, you know?"

"I know, but you and I both know how that will end," he said, turning his gaze away, his eyes drifting to the fogged mirror as he tried to distract himself. However, moments later, he felt Taehyung's hands on his hips, his fingers wrapping around his waist, pulling him firmly against his chest.

The warmth of Taehyung's body seeped into his skin, making his heartbeat quicken as he felt the soft pressure of his husband's lips on the nape of his neck. “That’s exactly how it should end.”

Seokjin couldn’t stop the shiver that coursed through him as Taehyung’s tongue traced the side of his neck, cleaning the remaining drops of water while his hands held him in place, pressing him against his own pelvis, allowing him to feel the hardness against his backside. Seokjin’s eyes fluttered closed, and a soft moan escaped his lips as Taehyung’s teeth left their mark, sending shivers down his spine. His body melted into the touch, muscles relaxing into the heat of the younger man.

Taehyung's large hands slid over Seokjin's torso down to his pelvis. In a swift motion, he removed the towel, letting it fall to the floor. The older man trembled in anticipation as his husband took his length in his hand and began a slow, deliberate motion that drew soft moans from his lips.

Taehyung’s grip was firm and confident, his fingers wrapping around Seokjin’s shaft in a way that made him feel desired and cherished. As his husband's fingers continued their skillful work, Seokjin’s breathing became shallower, his hips moving involuntarily to match the rhythm of the strokes. He tightened his grip, and Taehyung's thumb teased the sensitive tip, sending jolts of pleasure through Seokjin's body. His eyes opened, meeting Taehyung's gaze in the mirror, the intensity unmistakable.

"Bend over," Taehyung’s deep, commanding voice vibrated through him.

When Seokjin’s forearms made contact with the cold surface of the sink, a shiver traveled from his fingertips down his spine. The motion caused his back to arch slightly, exposing his backside to Taehyung’s eager gaze, who began leaving wet kisses down the length of his spine and a trail of vivid red marks on his skin.

Taehyung's hands massaged Seokjin’s buttocks, squeezing gently as he enjoyed the softness under his fingers. Soon, his wet fingers found their way to Seokjin’s entrance, with his index finger being the first to slide into his warmth. Seokjin felt a rush of excitement at the gentle resistance that met his touch. Taehyung took his time, moving his finger in a slow, deliberate dance, coaxing Seokjin’s body to relax and open for him. The older man’s breath quickened, his chest rising and falling faster as he felt the gentle invasion of his body.

Their eyes met again in the mirror. Seokjin’s face flushed deeply, and he quickly averted his gaze. He couldn’t bear the intensity of his husband’s stare, the way he seemed to see right through him. "I’ll let you do it now, but in a few minutes, you won’t be able to."

A second finger slid in, stretching his muscles and drawing a moan from his throat. The sound was barely audible, but Taehyung’s eyes sparkled with amusement in the mirror. His fingers continued their slow, deliberate movements inside Seokjin, searching for that perfect spot. When he found it, Seokjin’s body tensed, and a low groan escaped his lips. Taehyung grinned, pressing against the spot again, watching as Seokjin’s eyes rolled back and his hips jerked against the sink.

"See?" Taehyung said in a low, husky voice. "I know your body perfectly. No one else could satisfy you like I do."

Taehyung’s fingers slid out of him, leaving a sense of emptiness that Seokjin craved to be filled. He positioned himself at Seokjin’s entrance, the head of his shaft pressing gently against the tight ring of muscle. With one hand, he gripped Seokjin’s hip firmly, the other guiding himself inside.

Slowly, he pushed forward, savoring the initial resistance as Seokjin’s body stretched to accommodate him. Seokjin’s breath hitched as Taehyung’s length filled him, the sensation of fullness overwhelming him. His husband continued moving until his hips pressed flush against Seokjin’s, both of them staying still for a moment to adjust.

A moment later, Taehyung’s arm wrapped around Seokjin’s torso, a possessive hold that sent a rush of arousal through him. He tilted Seokjin’s chin up with a firm, yet gentle touch, their eyes meeting again in the mirror. Seokjin’s gaze was drawn to the sight of Taehyung’s chest pressed against his back, the defined muscles visible even as he leaned forward. Seokjin closed his eyes, but Taehyung’s grip on his chin tightened, keeping him in place.

“Keep your eyes open, Seokjin,” Taehyung whispered, his breath hot against his ear. “I want you to watch us, to see how perfectly we fit together.”

Seokjin obeyed, keeping his eyes open as Taehyung began moving inside him. His thrusts were slow and deliberate, each one stroking his walls as if they were being painted with a brush. He could feel every inch of Taehyung’s length, the sensation of being filled growing with each movement.

As Taehyung’s thrusts grew more insistent, Seokjin’s body was pushed against the sink, the cold porcelain a stark contrast to the heat radiating from his skin. The sound of their bodies colliding echoed through the room, a rhythmic accompaniment to their ragged breaths. Seokjin’s eyes, still fixed on his reflection, watched in a daze as Taehyung’s face contorted with pleasure, his jaw clenched, and his eyes focused on where they were connected.

Taehyung’s grip on Seokjin’s chin tightened, his fingers digging into the skin as he pulled him back, forcing him to arch and expose his neck. Seokjin’s back arched even more as Taehyung leaned in, his lips meeting the exposed skin. The suction was soft, but firm, and Seokjin could feel the blood rushing to the surface, leaving a mark that would remain long after their encounter.

Taehyung’s hand released Seokjin’s hip and slid to his lower abdomen, pressing firmly, drawing a moan from his husband’s lips. “Look how deep I am, love,” he murmured against Seokjin’s skin. “See how well you take me? You were made for me.”

Seokjin’s eyes traveled to where Taehyung’s hand pressed, and his face flushed an even deeper red when he noticed the bulge visible when Taehyung moved in a certain way. Then, he looked back at his own face and widened his eyes in surprise.

He was a mess.

His hair stuck out in all directions, his skin was decorated with various marks: some red, some pink, and some already turning purple.

The sensation was overwhelming, and Seokjin could feel his legs trembling as he struggled to maintain his balance. His erection, hard and aching, was leaking large drops of pre-cum that slid down its length, dripping onto the floor.

Taehyung’s thrusts became more urgent, his hips snapping forward with a force that made Seokjin moan loudly and grip his husband’s forearms, his nails digging in and leaving long red marks.

Without warning, Taehyung reached around and wrapped his hand around Seokjin’s length, making him gasp. Taehyung began stroking him in time with his thrusts, his grip firm and sure. Soon, every thought in Seokjin’s mind vanished, replaced by pleasure as he let out a long moan, feeling his balls tighten until he came hard, spilling over the mirror.

Taehyung smirked. "Now it's my turn."

The man's thrusts became slower as he lifted Seokjin's legs, exposing the place where they were joined. The older man's entrance stretched wide around Taehyung's thick member, and he couldn't help but moan as he felt the pressure inside him. His husband's fingers dug into the back of Seokjin's thighs as he held him in place, his thrusts becoming more deliberate as he bottomed out within him. 

Soon, the thrusts slowed even more, and Seokjin's eyes were fixed on the point where they were connected, his gaze locked on where Taehyung's thick member disappeared into his body. "T-tae," he breathed out the name like a plea, his voice barely above a whisper. 

Taehyung's response was immediate; his hips moved forward in a smooth, reassuring motion. "Easy, baby," he murmured, his voice broken with restraint. "Just a little longer." 

Seokjin closed his eyes, his head falling toward his husband's shoulder as he felt Taehyung tense behind him and let out a low growl. The younger man's hips thrust forward, his body shuddering as he emitted a low, guttural moan. Seokjin felt the hot, thick liquid filling him to the brim, a sensation that was both overwhelming and exhilarating. 

Carefully, his husband lowered him without pulling out, his arms wrapping around Seokjin's waist to support his weight. His legs trembled as he felt Taehyung's length still inside him, the gentle pulse of his husband's thrusts sending little shivers down his spine. When his feet touched the ground, Seokjin's knees buckled, and he would have fallen if Taehyung hadn't been holding him. 

"That was incredible," the younger man whispered, his voice barely audible above the sound of his own heavy breathing. 

Seokjin had no energy to respond. He stood there, passive and still, as his husband pulled out and searched for something to clean him up. "Seokjin, love, I need you to hold onto the sink, or sit in the jacuzzi so you don’t fall," the man said, his voice full of gentleness. "Do you want me to carry you?" 

The older man nodded as his husband picked him up and positioned him on the edge of the jacuzzi, turning it on. As it filled, he went to grab a towel, soaking it in hot water and beginning to gently clean him up, erasing the evidence of their act. The touch was soothing, and Seokjin closed his eyes, letting out a soft sigh as he felt the tension melt away from his body. 

Taehyung's hands moved over Seokjin's skin with a delicacy reserved for that which is precious and fragile. Each touch was intentional, filled with a tenderness that contrasted with his imposing presence. "Better?" the man whispered, his warm breath brushing against Seokjin's ear. 

"...Yes," Seokjin replied, and as he spoke, his body relaxed even more, sinking against his husband's strong chest, feeling his warmth through the water. The sigh that escaped his lips was involuntary, a mix of relief and relaxation as Taehyung's hands began to roam over his shoulders. Each pressure from his fingers was a balm for his tired body, and Seokjin closed his eyes. The movements were slow and careful, as if Taehyung had all the time in the world, as if all that mattered in that moment was the older man's well-being. 

They stayed like that in silence for several minutes, the soft sound of bubbling water and their calm breaths filling the space. Seokjin felt his once-tense muscles completely yield to Taehyung's massage, as his eyelids began to grow heavy, as if each caress drew him closer to sleep. 

"Take me to bed, Tae," the man whispered, his voice barely a murmur. 

Taehyung smiled behind him, placing a gentle kiss on the curve of his neck before whispering in his ear, “Whatever you want, love.” With careful movements, he helped him out of the jacuzzi, wrapping him in a towel to dry him off. Each gesture was as intimate and natural as breathing. Once out of the bathroom, Taehyung effortlessly carried him to the bed, where he tenderly set him down. He pulled out pajamas from their suitcases, and within moments, both were changed and under the covers. 

“Rest,” his husband whispered as he lay down beside him, wrapping him in his arms. The warmth of his body and the fatigue were enough for Seokjin to close his eyes, surrendering completely to sleep. 

Hours later, the incessant vibrating of the cellphone jolted him abruptly from sleep. He blinked in confusion, feeling disoriented in the darkness of the room, in that unfamiliar space. It took him a few seconds to locate the device on the nightstand, and just as his fingers brushed the screen, the ringing stopped. 

He groaned in frustration, tempted to set the phone aside and dive back into the tranquility of the sheets, just like Taehyung, who was sleeping soundly beside him. Sometimes, Seokjin envied his husband's ability to sleep no matter the chaos around him. He, on the other hand, was always a victim of any disturbance. 

But before he could settle in again, the cellphone vibrated once more, insistently, relentlessly. This time, Jungkook's name appeared on the screen, glowing with a disturbing intensity, like an alarm he couldn't ignore. An uncomfortable sensation settled in his stomach. 

Should he answer? 

He squeezed the device between his hands, torn between following the impulse to answer or letting it go to voicemail. But before he could make a decision, the cellphone rang again. Once more. And again. The persistent buzzing filtered into the silence of the room, causing Taehyung to stir under the sheets, letting out a sleepy grunt. 

Seokjin jolted, his heart pounding as he let the cellphone drop to the floor with a dull thud that made his husband turn over, though he didn't fully wake up. 

With hurried movements, Seokjin got out of bed, feeling an uncomfortable pull in his lower back with each step toward the balcony. He opened the door carefully, letting the cool night air envelop him, and hurried to pick up the phone from the ground. Without thinking twice, he swiped his finger across the screen to answer. 

“Hello?” he whispered, his voice cut off by the cold and anxiety. 

The first thing Seokjin heard on the other end of the line was a loud noise that pierced his ears, forcing him to pull the phone away and lower the volume before he went deaf. The sound was chaotic and cluttered, as if Jungkook were in the middle of a party. Blasting music, shouting voices, people singing; all mixed together in a chaotic whirlpool that made it impossible to understand anything. He waited a few seconds, but no response came. 

"Hello?" he repeated, this time louder, his patience wearing thin. 

Again, nothing. Just that overwhelming noise filling his ears. The people around him continued to laugh and shout, while Seokjin stood on the balcony, feeling the chill of the night on his skin and the warm bed behind him calling him back. He felt ridiculous waiting for Jungkook to respond. 

Finally, a broken voice emerged from the noise. "Seokjin..." Jungkook sounded dragged out, as if the words were costing him more than usual. "I-I thought y-you weren't going to answer."

"What?" Seokjin frowned, unable to understand a single word. The connection, or maybe the amount of alcohol in the boy's voice, made everything sound distorted.

"Give me a moment!" Jungkook shouted, but the distortion made him sound distant.

"What?" Seokjin repeated, exasperated.

He heard the sound of chaos fade away, followed by some vague greetings directed at Jungkook. A few moments passed before the young man's voice returned, clearer this time but still dragged out like before.

"Yeobo..." Jungkook's pleading tone made Seokjin's stomach contract painfully. "I thought you wouldn't answer me."

"You called me five times," the older man replied, trying to maintain his composure. "If I hadn’t answered, you wouldn’t have stopped."

"You could have turned off your phone, but you didn’t." Jungkook's voice sounded firmer, though tinged with melancholy. "Did you want to hear me too? Because I... was dying to hear your voice, Jinnie." The last phrase seemed loaded with pain. "I’ve missed you too much."

"Stop it," Seokjin replied, his tone forced, gritting his teeth. "I don't want to hear it."

"That's not true, and you know it." Jungkook continued. His voice quickened, as if he feared losing the little control he had left. "And besides, I don’t care if you don’t want to. The last time I listened to you, now it’s your turn to listen to me. If you hang up, I’ll call back. If you block my number, I’ll ask someone else for their phone. If you block me everywhere, it doesn’t matter, because I’ll still see you at work, and I’ll make you listen to me." He took a breath, his voice heavy with palpable desperation. "I need you to listen to me."

"If I do… if I do, it’ll just make things harder for both of us," Seokjin pleaded, his voice breaking under the tension constricting his chest. "Please, Jungkook, please don’t do this."

"I miss you," Jungkook blurted out, as if the words had been burning his tongue. "I’ve missed you since the moment I woke up alone in that bed. I’ve missed you since I got out of the car and waited for you to tell me to come back."

"Jungkook…" The name barely escaped Seokjin's lips, a weak plea, but Jungkook could no longer hold back.

"I miss your laughter, your jokes. The way you say my name when I annoy you, and how sweet your voice becomes when you’re embarrassed. I miss how your eyes shine in the sun and how your brows furrow when you’re focused. I miss how you make tea and how your hands move with such precision. I miss the color of your lips, how they curve when you smile. I miss the moles that form a triangle on your face."

Each word from Jungkook reached him like a painful caress, reminding him of moments Seokjin had tried to bury beneath layers of resignation.

"I miss how childish you can be when you lose, the happiness in your eyes when you talk about your dreams, and the love you feel for your daughters. I miss the excitement with which you greeted me and the blush on your cheeks. And I’ve been missing every damn inch of your skin since that night." Jungkook’s voice trembled with intensity, almost on the verge of breaking. "I miss feeling you in my arms, feeling you against my lips. I miss how you tighten for me, the way you moan my name. I miss the caresses, the marks on my back. I miss being able to hold you."

The silence that followed was heart-wrenching, but when Jungkook's sob broke through the receiver, Seokjin's heart shattered completely. That connection he had tried to sever, that pain he had wanted to bury, reached him once more.

Oh, this time he would definitely bleed out.

"I n-need you more than I can bear," Jungkook stammered through sobs, his voice broken by desperation. "And I want it to stop, believe me I do! But I just can’t. My mind, my soul, and my body are clinging to you. And I can’t be the only one feeling this. There’s no way you don’t feel like you’re falling apart since we started avoiding each other."

Seokjin closed his eyes tightly, feeling tears start to roll down his cheeks as Jungkook's words pierced him mercilessly. Of course he felt it. He had been feeling it for years, since that first time he had to pull away, leave him behind, tear himself from Jungkook's arms, and give up everything that could have been.

"I love you," Jungkook continued, his voice broken by sadness and longing. "Damn it, even though we haven’t known each other for long, I know I love you. I love you so much, and all I want to do is exist for you. I love you, I love you, I love you."

Seokjin brought a trembling hand to his mouth, trying to hold back the sobs that threatened to escape. The pain in his chest was almost unbearable, and every word from Jungkook only sunk him deeper into that abyss he knew had no escape.

"And... I need to know," Jungkook whispered, his voice barely audible through desperation, "I need to know if you feel the same. I need you to tell me what I am to you, please, yeobo, please."

The words were trapped in Seokjin's throat, caught between what he wanted to say and what he knew he couldn't allow himself to release. His heart pounded violently, pushing every beat like a reminder of the love he was trying to repress. "If I told you… if I did, you know it wouldn’t change anything, right?" His voice came out broken, fragile, as if speaking might completely shatter him.

"It could change everything," Jungkook replied, clinging to every fragment of hope.

"No, Jungkook, no." Seokjin took a deep breath, trying to maintain the control he felt slipping away with every word. "This is why I wanted things to stay this way, to avoid reaching this point."

The line fell silent for a moment, but when Jungkook spoke again, he did so with a tone that made Seokjin tremble.

"Why are you so afraid to love me?"

The question was like a blow. They had had this conversation before, more than once, and yet the pain remained alive, like a wound that never healed. "We already talked about this," Seokjin replied, his voice barely a whisper laced with exhaustion.

"Do you love me?"

"Enough." He pleaded.

"Just answer, Seokjin," Jungkook insisted, his tone pleading and full of a vulnerability that pierced him. "Please, just do it."

The seconds that followed felt eternal, stretching between them like an insurmountable abyss. Seokjin held the phone against his ear, his heart pounding so loudly he could barely hear himself breathe. Finally, with a resigned and defeated sigh, he let the words escape that had been consuming him from within.

"I love you too."

The phrase came out in an almost imperceptible whisper, but the weight of what it meant fell upon them like an inevitable sentence. Perhaps those words, so longed for by Jungkook, would also be the beginning of the end.

"I've dreamed of hearing that for so long," the young man said, and Seokjin was sure he could hear his smile through the phone. "I love you, yeobo."

"I love you, Kookie," he replied softly.

The boy let out a laugh, filled with pure joy. "Thank you, thank you. You make me so happy."

"Jungkook, you know this isn’t going to go any further, right?" the older man asked, fearing the boy would get his hopes up. "This doesn’t change anything."

"We could…"

"No."

"Give me a chance," Jungkook insisted, his voice filled with emotion. "Just one, and I’ll show you I’m worth it. I’ll show you the risk is worth it."

"Jungkook, I told you once, and I’ll say it again: I’m not going to abandon my daughters."

"And I’m not asking you to," Jungkook replied, his voice firm yet calm. "But there are ways you and I could be together without you having to leave them."

“You don’t know Taehyung.”  

“You're right,” he admitted, with a disarming calmness. “But I know you.” Seokjin felt those words penetrate his defenses. “How much longer do you think you can stay by his side if fear is the only thing keeping you there?”  

That struck deep within him, stirring emotions Seokjin had tried to bury.

“How long can love withstand before terror breaks it?”  

“You don’t understand how complicated it is,” he murmured, trying to convince both himself and Jungkook.  

“I know it’s not easy,” the boy replied gently but unwaveringly. “But the life you’re living isn’t fair to you… or anyone. You deserve something more, something real.”  

“The real thing is my daughters,” Seokjin responded, his voice trembling. “They are the only thing that matters to me.”  

“And I’m not asking you to give them up,” he insisted. “I’m just asking you to allow yourself to be happy, Seokjin. To think of yourself, even if just once.”  

The silence between them stretched, heavy with an impossible-to-ignore tension. Seokjin wanted to respond, to say something that would close the conversation and never touch the subject again, but he knew Jungkook was right. His love was on a tightrope, and that realization was more terrifying than anything else.

“What if I’m wrong?” he finally asked, his voice barely a whisper. “What if I lose everything and regret it?”  

Jungkook took a deep breath. “It’s a risk,” he admitted, “but you can’t live in fear forever. You can’t spend your life wondering what would have happened if you had chosen something different. Just give me a chance to show you that you can have something more, something better.” 

Seokjin closed his eyes, feeling the weight of his own fears crushing him. He was caught between the love for his little ones and the growing desire for something he couldn’t fully define.

“Just think about it,” Jungkook added, his voice soft yet filled with hope. “You don’t have to decide now. But please, don’t close this door without looking at it carefully first.” 

“Okay, I’ll think about it. Goodbye.” 

“Goodbye, Seokjin.”  

The silence that followed was deafening; even the waves crashing against the rocks couldn’t shake him from his daze.  

He couldn’t take it anymore.  

His knees buckled, and he crumpled to the ground, letting the weight of everything he had been holding back crush him completely. The tears he had managed to hold back for a few moments now flowed uncontrollably, spilling from his eyes in a silent torrent of pain.  

The cold ground beneath him barely anchored him to reality. He didn’t know how to move forward. Everything felt so blurry, so confusing. Jungkook's words kept echoing in his mind, like an inescapable truth choking him.

Seokjin sobbed, feeling the weight of his decisions—and the ones he hadn’t made yet—suffocating him, taking him to a place of deep despair. How had he gotten here? How was he supposed to choose between what he wanted and what he knew was right? Love, duty, fear—all mixed in a whirlwind that made him lose himself in the darkness.  

And as the tears continued to fall, Seokjin realized he was so lost that he didn’t even know what the way forward was anymore.

Night

Falling in love with Taehyung was natural, like a river flowing with the current and emptying into the sea. There was no turbulence, no doubts, just a feeling of inevitability, that it was meant to happen.  

When they met, Seokjin was barely twenty-one, still in medical school, just another exhausted student surviving on short naps and energy drinks to get through his finals. Taehyung, at twenty, was part of the art faculty, spending most of his days in his studio, surrounded by canvases, brushes, and paints that always ended up smudging his clothes or face. The likelihood of them crossing paths was minimal, almost nonexistent, and yet it happened on a sunny morning, with a clear blue sky and silence enveloping them.  

They were both in the library, searching for an anatomy book of which, to their misfortune and fate's whim, only one copy was available.

“I need it to save lives; you need it to make doodles,” Seokjin had said, stress invading every cell of his body. He had gone weeks without sleeping well, caught between the exhausting routine of the hospital and impending exams. Normally, he would never have let something like that slip; on his best days, he would have let the boy take the book, and he would have asked a friend to borrow it. But on this occasion, he was at the end of his rope, and the words came out unfiltered.

“Thanks to my doodles, as you call them, you have that book in your hands,” the boy replied with a grunt, irritated. The dark circles under his eyes and the pallor of his skin revealed that he too was exhausted. A small splash of blue stood out on one of his cheeks, probably from some recent project. His dark hair fell messily over his forehead, and his expression was a mix of frustration and fatigue. With a furrowed brow and tight lips… both were on the verge of breaking, and that moment seemed to be the spark that would ignite the fire.  

Seokjin watched him for another second, pride anchored in his posture. He was unwilling to give in, and the boy in front of him seemed equally stubborn, arms crossed and brow furrowed.  

The atmosphere in the library felt dense, charged with that silent tension. The book, now a trophy in dispute, lay on the table as if it were the only thing that mattered at that moment.

“I’m not letting go of it,” Seokjin said, keeping his gaze fixed on the boy.  

“Neither am I,” the other replied, a spark of defiance in his eyes.

It was absurd; they both knew that. A simple book shouldn’t provoke a fight between two complete strangers, and yet there they were, exhausted, irritated, clinging to a dispute that seemed bigger than themselves. Neither would back down.  

“I have an exam to study for; can’t you get the book somewhere else?” Seokjin said, not bothering to hide the annoyance in his voice. 

“Why don’t you do it?” the boy retorted immediately.  

The older man scoffed, letting out a mix of exasperation and fatigue. “The book is in the health section, not in arts. If anyone is being rude here, it’s you.” 

The boy narrowed his eyes, clearly irritated, and for a few seconds, they were both caught in that silent confrontation, neither willing to yield. 

“I’m going to use it for an anatomy project, a sculpture,” the younger one said, with a firmness that surprised Seokjin. “So technically, I need it too.”  

Before Seokjin could respond, he saw the boy’s hands reach for the book decisively. The man reacted instantly, his fingers also wrapping around the spine at the same time as his. Now they were both holding it.  

“Let go,” he growled, his dark eyes challenging.  

“No,” the boy replied, tightening his grip, refusing to be intimidated.  

The struggle was absurd, unnecessarily prolonged until the librarian, with a stern look and a calm but firm voice, intervened.  

“What do you think you’re doing? This is ridiculous. If you can’t behave like adults and come to an agreement, neither of you will get the book,” she scolded them, as if they were little children fighting over a toy.  

Both, momentarily embarrassed, exchanged glances. Seokjin was the first to speak, trying to avoid the embarrassment of losing the book altogether. “Fine. Then come to my apartment,” he suggested, as if it were the most logical solution.

“Why don’t you come to mine?” the younger one replied immediately, as if he had already anticipated that suggestion. “Or do you want me to haul my materials over there? Where there’s no space, and I can mess everything up.”    

Seokjin gritted his teeth. He knew he was right, though he didn’t want to admit it. He couldn’t propose something more sensible, so resigned, he said, “Alright, let’s go to your apartment.”

After a brief but intense discussion about who would take the book—which Taehyung, of course, won—they exchanged numbers and left the library with a cloud of discomfort around them. 

On the day they finally met again, Seokjin arrived still in his blue hospital uniform, exhaustion reflected in his slumped shoulders and the mask covering his face. He rang the bell, and when the door opened, Taehyung greeted him with a crooked smile, inviting him in without saying much.  

“You can leave your things on the dining table. I set up the place so you could study there. I’ll be on the other side.” He pointed to a clear area where there normally would have been furniture. Instead, there was a large table covered in clay and tools that Seokjin didn’t quite recognize.  

“Thanks,” the older man murmured as he approached the dining table, pulling out his iPad from his backpack. Then, with the most neutral tone he could manage, he asked, “How do you want to do this?”  

Taehyung, without looking away from his work, replied, “I’ll check the book when I need it for the sculpture. In the meantime, you can study. I won’t bother you.”  

Seokjin nodded, though the situation still felt a bit strange. He couldn’t deny that the boy seemed like an organized chaos; the space was carefully prepared for both of them, as if he had truly thought about how to make it work for both.  

“Alright.”  

Hours passed one after the other, while the sun slowly began to descend on the horizon, bathing the room in warm orange tones of the sunset that barely filtered through the windows. Seokjin had been so focused on his studies that he didn’t realize how much his body was starting to suffer. The muscles in his shoulders were tense, his eyes grew heavier, and before he could stop it, he fell asleep on the anatomy book, his head resting against the open pages.

A few minutes later, he felt a gentle touch on his shoulder and a barely audible murmur. Taehyung was waking him up gently, leaning slightly towards him, his voice calm but clear enough to break the veil of sleep.  

“If you’re sleepy, you can rest for a while on my bed.”  

Seokjin blinked, dazed and a bit disoriented. He wanted to refuse out of pride, or perhaps discomfort, but the exhaustion was too much. He had gone days without sleeping well; the endless shifts at the hospital had taken their toll, and his body was screaming for a break. In the end, he nodded slightly, without saying a word.  

Taehyung guided him slowly to the room in the back. It was a simple space but cozy, with a bed that seemed even more tempting now that his eyelids felt as heavy as lead. The boy offered him a blanket without saying much, and Seokjin, without thinking twice, settled into the bed, letting himself be carried away by the fatigue.  

In a matter of seconds, he fell asleep again, this time into a deep slumber, while the faint sound of Taehyung’s movements in the other room reached him like a distant echo, a reminder of the other presence in the midst of the tranquility that enveloped him.  

He didn’t know how much time had passed, but when he woke up, darkness already enveloped the room, welcoming him with its silent calm. Seokjin blinked a couple of times, adjusting to the dim light, before slowly getting up and heading back to the dining area. The first thing he saw was a plate with a sandwich and a cup of tea waiting for him on the table.  

“Finally awake. I was starting to think you had fallen into a coma,” Taehyung said from the other side of the room, looking up at him with a teasing smile on his lips. His hands were covered in clay, the sleeves of his shirt rolled up, still immersed in his project. “I made you something to eat, but it’s already cold. I thought you’d get up faster.”  

Seokjin sat in front of the plate, noticing with a sigh that hunger was beginning to catch up with him. “You didn’t have to do this, but thank you,” he murmured, his voice still heavy with remnants of sleep.  

The younger man shrugged, as if it were the most natural thing in the world. “You looked exhausted. I thought it would be good for you to eat something when you woke up.”  

Seokjin nodded slightly and took the sandwich, biting into it in silence while glancing at Taehyung, who continued to mold the clay with focused precision. Although the food was already cold, the gesture felt warm, a small display of kindness that, at that moment, lifted the weight on his shoulders. However, he could still feel the fatigue clinging to him, as if the sleep hadn’t been enough to fully free him.  

The silence they shared was comfortable, almost domestic, and for the first time in a long time, the older man allowed himself to relax.  

“How’s your sculpture coming along?” Seokjin asked, catching Taehyung off guard, who stopped moving his hands for a second, taken aback by the sudden question.  

“Um, good,” he replied, a slight blush creeping onto his cheeks, his demeanor shifting suddenly from the confident assurance he had shown earlier to something more shy, almost reserved. “I made a lot of progress while you were sleeping,” he added.  

Intrigued, Seokjin got up to take a closer look at the clay figure Taehyung was shaping. The face of the sculpture seemed vaguely familiar, with soft and precise details that evoked a sense of déjà vu.  

“What did you base it on?” he asked, leaning a little forward to appreciate it better. 

The younger one paused again, not lifting his gaze from his work. “A cute boy,” he replied with a naturalness that disarmed Seokjin. He said it as if it were the most obvious thing in the world, with a mischievous smile playing on his lips, as if he knew exactly what effect those words would have.  

“Oh,” was all Seokjin managed to articulate, feeling the words escape him at the sudden mention of the “cute boy” Taehyung had used as inspiration. A vague discomfort washed over him, but not in an unpleasant way; rather, it was the confusion of not knowing whether he should read between the lines or let it go.  

However, before he could react beyond that simple “oh,” Taehyung turned to look at him. His eyes, dark and deep, scanned him with an intensity that made him feel exposed under that gaze. It was as if the boy were deciphering him, examining every little detail of his face. Suddenly, Seokjin felt himself fading in that look, like a leaf carried by a gentle yet dangerous current.  

“Did you know your freckles form a triangle?” the boy murmured, his voice barely a whisper breaking through the stillness of the place.  

“What?” Seokjin could hardly process the question when, without warning, Taehyung quickly wiped his hands with a cloth, although some remnants of clay still clung to his fingers. Without hesitation, the younger one moved closer, his warm fingers brushing against Seokjin's face delicately, as if it were the first time he touched something precious, carefully tracing over his skin.  

“Here,” he whispered, his index finger gliding over the freckle near the older man’s eye, stroking gently. “Here,” he continued, touching a spot under his cheekbone, “and here,” he finished, his touch stopping at the curve of his jaw.  

The contact was unexpected, intimate, charged with something that the older man couldn’t immediately identify, but which made him hold his breath. The silence became heavy, and suddenly, all he could hear was the rapid beating of his own heart, echoing in his ears like a distant echo.

It was as if the world had shrunk to that precise moment. To just the two of them and the way Taehyung's touch enveloped him, soft and warm, like the water of the sea. The brush of his fingers was a slow and steady ebb, like waves caressing the shore, gradually pulling Seokjin into the depths. And in that instant, he knew.

He wanted to let himself be carried away by him. To float, without any resistance, to lose himself in the vastness of Taehyung as one surrenders to the ocean without fear. He wanted to give himself to that sensation. They existed alone, in the whisper of a moment so intimate that it seemed to erase the rest of the world.

Seokjin wanted to merge his being with that sea, to be part of the same tide that drew him toward the unknown, yet somehow provided him with a calm he didn’t know he needed.

That day they didn’t kiss. In fact, they barely exchanged a few more words, but something had changed. A subtle tension, almost imperceptible, floated between them, like a magnetic field that, although invisible, inevitably drew them together. It was like the sea chasing the moon, eager to reach it, to touch it, if only for a moment, to hold it in its embrace .

The moon shone high that night, solitary in a dark blue sky, without stars or clouds to accompany it. The cold clung to their skin, but the warmth they both felt inside was enough. There, on the rooftop, in the stillness of the sleeping city, they were alone in their own world. Taehyung looked at him with fascination, his eyes soft and curious, as his fingers gently traced the freckles that dotted Seokjin’s skin, as if he were trying to memorize each one.

Then, Seokjin took his hand, intertwining their fingers for a moment before leaning down to place a soft kiss on his palm. It was a small gesture, but filled with a sweetness that made Taehyung's heart race. The younger one said nothing; it wasn’t necessary. He simply leaned in closer, his breathing calm, brushing his nose against Seokjin’s in an intimate and delicate gesture, until, finally, their lips touched.

The kiss was slow, laden with everything they hadn’t yet said, a silent confession under the moon. And from that moment on, they never separated again.

For a long time, it was just Taehyung and Seokjin, orbiting around each other, drawn by that invisible but undeniable force. The magnetism they felt was enough because love was them, and in them resided everything they needed. Love moved them, consumed them, filled them to the depths. It kept them alive, whole, as if each heartbeat of their hearts echoed the other.

Until one day, they stopped being that way.

Seokjin didn’t know exactly when it started to happen, but what was once a calm and serene sea began to transform into a dark and overwhelming ocean. It pulled him down, making him feel as if each breath were a struggle, burning his lungs, immobilizing him under its weight. And now, despite still living together, despite sharing the same routine, everything felt so empty.

Each kiss, each caress, had turned cold, distant, and that tormented him because nothing seemed to have changed. Taehyung was still the same. He treated him with the same tenderness, with the same affection, imposing nothing, demanding nothing, always perfect in his love. So why could Seokjin no longer love him in the same way?

He refused to admit it for a long time. He forced himself to pretend, to act as if what they had still existed. Because love couldn’t just disappear, right? It was illogical, foolish, impossible. But it was happening. He felt it fading away, drop by drop, unable to stop it.

He tried to fix it, to find the thread that had once connected them, but his heart was closing more and more, refusing to let Taehyung back in. And Taehyung noticed.

“What do I need to do? What can I say? What do you want from me?” The man’s voice broke, the pain evident in every word, his tears spilling over, helpless.

But Seokjin had no answer. There was nothing he could say, even though deep down he knew the truth: the love that had kept them alive and whole, the love that was everything, had run dry. And he, unable to accept it, could not say it out loud.

Then, Seokjin saw the side of Taehyung he had never seen before, that dark and tumultuous facet, like a tsunami sweeping away everything in its path. The first time Taehyung exploded, he froze, unable to process the words hurled at him in fury. 

“You’re not doing anything!” he had shouted, his face flushed with rage. “I’m trying to make everything the way it was before, and you’re not even trying! Do you not love me anymore?” 

Seokjin could only murmur, “I’m sorry, I’ll try harder,” even though something inside him knew it wouldn’t be enough. 

From then on, he tried everything. He brought him flowers, attended all his exhibitions, they had sex for days, went on dates, to restaurants, to museums. He gave gifts, some bought and others handmade. But none of that restored the meaning they had once shared. Both knew it, though neither admitted it. 

The tsunami kept advancing, unstoppable. 

“Aren’t you coming with me to my nephew’s birthday?” Taehyung asked one afternoon, the tone of his voice already tinged with reproach. 

“Tae, sweetheart, I was on shift all night. I’m exhausted.” 

“Fine.” That one word, spoken with a coldness Seokjin knew all too well, made him get up from the bed. He forced himself to dress and accompany Taehyung. He endured for hours, smiling in front of the family, pretending everything was fine. The children ran happily around his partner, who adored them, and Seokjin watched them with a heavy heart as everyone started joking about what a good father he would be. 

He felt like he was drowning. 

Children? 

On the way home, Taehyung spoke enthusiastically, his eyes shining as he drove. “I think it’s time to consider starting a family, don’t you think?” 

“What?” Seokjin could barely concentrate. 

“A family,” Taehyung repeated, as if it were the simplest thing in the world. “We both have stable jobs; we could sell the apartment and buy a bigger house. Maybe a puppy too.” 

“I don’t know if that’s…” 

But Taehyung didn’t stop. “I’ve always wanted a big family, you know? Three kids, or even five.” 

Seokjin felt the air running out. The space in the car felt smaller and smaller. In his mind, the water kept rising, filling every corner, leaving him unable to breathe. Taehyung’s voice became a distant echo, and suddenly, everything around him began to dissolve. He felt like he was drowning. 

“Jin!” Taehyung shouted, alarmed. 

Seokjin blinked, barely aware that the car had stopped. The sensation of sinking underwater had completely trapped him, and now he was sitting in the passenger seat, his hands trembling and tears rolling down his cheeks without him even realizing it. Taehyung held him in his arms, wiping his tears with a mixture of worry and panic in his eyes. 

“What’s wrong? What happened?” Taehyung asked, his voice soft, trying to calm him. 

Seokjin took a deep breath, searching for an answer, anything that could explain his reaction without causing more pain. He lied. “I’m exhausted... I need a break.” 

They never spoke of it again.

Days turned into weeks, and weeks into months. The distance between them grew imperceptibly but steadily, like a crack in a wall that slowly expanded until it became insurmountable. Neither of them knew how to stop it. Every conversation became more superficial, the silences grew longer, and even though they shared the same space, it felt as if they were miles apart.

Seokjin felt lost, as if suddenly everything that once made sense in his life had crumbled without him being able to do anything to prevent it. What was he doing wrong? What had changed? Why couldn’t they go back to being those two exhausted college students who lived off promises and dreams, who held each other up through the storms?

Perhaps love was fading for that very reason. They were no longer those people. The promises that had once united them now seemed as distant as memories from another life, from another version of themselves that no longer existed and never would again.

Days increasingly took on a deeper blue hue, with dark shadows cornering themselves in every nook. The sunlight no longer warmed the empty space in which Seokjin found himself trapped. His life had become a winter landscape, cold and lonely, where the love he had once felt suffocated him. 

He needed something, anything, to pull him out of that place for a moment.

Then, one day, his phone rang. The screen displayed a name he hadn’t seen in years: Kim Namjoon, an old college friend he used to turn to when he didn’t understand something; after all, the guy was a genius. They spoke briefly, catching up superficially, until Namjoon offered him the chance to participate in a new project—something that piqued Seokjin’s curiosity immediately. They called it "Reminiscences," a small company working on an experimental treatment designed to help people erase traumatic and painful memories.

The older man accepted almost without thinking. What he didn’t know, what he couldn’t foresee, was that this seemingly simple decision would be the turning point in his life.

It was in that project where he met Jeon Jungkook.

The first meeting was anything but insignificant. Seokjin couldn’t help but feel captivated by the intensity shining in those large dark eyes, as if they hid hundreds of constellations, each pulsating with a unique energy, caught between galaxies. It was as if the universe had placed a small part of its glow in him, granting him a light that seemed to radiate from his gaze.

Jungkook's black hair fell messily, giving him a youthful, rebellious air that contrasted with the delicate metallic jewel adorning his lower lip. His appearance had a mix of carelessness and precision, as if every detail, though accidental, had been carefully designed. His muscular, defined arms bore the first traces of tattoos—marks that seemed to promise untold stories, secrets known only to him.

There was something overwhelming about the young man's presence, as if the very space around them altered, as if he were a gravitational force pulling everything into his orbit, including Seokjin. That first glance left him with the feeling that he was about to be drawn into something much deeper than he was prepared to face, even though, deep down, a part of him longed to discover it.

Jungkook was five years younger than Seokjin, and that age difference sometimes became evident in the way he moved, always with an energy that seemed to overflow from his body. He was clumsy at times, restless, as if his own vitality were too great to contain. In the office, he was never still. There was always something he needed to do, something to participate in, even if it wasn’t necessary.

“Do you need help with that?” he often asked, with an eager smile. “Do you want me to take it? I can accompany you.” He repeated those phrases so often that Seokjin began to anticipate them, finding a strange calm in his presence. There was something about that constant willingness that made him endearing, as if Jungkook were trying to compensate for his youth with acts of service, unaware that his mere company was enough.

And then it happened.

Without warning, without plans drawn up, without questions preceding the inevitable, something changed. It was a glance, a conversation at the end of the day, the accidental brush of a hand, a small insignificant gesture that triggered a torrent of emotions. Suddenly, Seokjin could no longer ignore what he had begun to feel, what had been brewing between them for weeks, perhaps months.

He had crossed an invisible line, one he never thought he would cross. And once on the other side, there was no turning back.

Looking back on that time, perhaps he should have foreseen it. The way they complemented each other, so natural and chaotic at the same time. 

Falling in love with Jungkook was like discovering the universe, as if suddenly everything he had known was eclipsed by something vaster, more intense. It was a beautiful chaos, a whirlwind of emotions that shook him from the very first moment. It wasn’t gradual or predictable; it was like gazing at the stars for the first time and realizing the vastness of the unknown.

Jungkook… Jungkook was like those bright orbs. So high and unreachable, filled with promises that never quite materialized but were always there, twinkling in the darkness. He represented the distant, the thing that could only be admired from afar. And though Seokjin couldn’t touch him, the light of Jungkook always reached him, dazzling, reminding him of what he yearned for deep within his being.

However, not everyone can reach the stars, not when you're drowning deep in the sea.

“Why are you late?” Taehyung’s voice greeted Seokjin as soon as he crossed the threshold of their apartment. His tone was controlled, but his rigid posture, arms crossed over his chest, betrayed the contained tension.

“I had work.” It wasn’t a lie. Jungkook and he had spent the afternoon at the office, finalizing details of some reports and preparing for the weekend meeting. It’s just that the work had finished hours ago, and instead of going home, they decided to go up to the roof to drink beers under the night sky, talking about anything, pushing away the stress for a while.

“Did the work include drinking?” Taehyung narrowed his eyes, his jaw tightening with that mix of frustration and disappointment that Seokjin found so familiar.

The older man sighed, feeling the accumulated fatigue and irritation. “We were stressed and wanted to have a little fun, that’s all. You do the same with your coworkers all the time.” As he spoke, he bent down to take off his shoes, avoiding Taehyung's inquisitive gaze. He wanted this to pass quickly, for the argument not to drag on longer than necessary.

“In fact, today is the first time you’ve arrived early,” he added with a hint of sarcasm. “Did Woo-shik not entertain you this time?”

The question hung heavily in the air, laden with resentment that had been building over time. He knew it wasn’t fair to say it, but at  that moment, he couldn’t help it.

“Woo-shik is my friend,” Taehyung declared with a contained fury that echoed in every word. “And unlike your intern, he doesn’t follow me around like a lost puppy.”

“Of course not,” Seokjin replied, spitting the words out, “because you’re the one who does that.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Taehyung was angry, and his voice showed that he didn’t understand or didn’t want to understand what his partner was accusing him of.

“Taehyung, all you’ve done these months is talk about how incredible an artist Woo-shik is, how you think his art is the most fascinating thing on the planet. You always talk about how much you want to impress him, about going to every single one of his damn exhibitions.

“Well, he’s someone I admire a lot, what’s wrong with that?” the younger replied, his voice losing some strength, as if he deep down knew where this conversation was heading.

“In that case, Jungkook also admires me quite a bit.” Seokjin let the phrase drop as he passed by him, heading straight to the kitchen for a glass of water.

“That’s completely different,” Taehyung said, following him without yielding. “He’s always doing things to get your full attention, like that time I went to the office to bring you lunch, and he wouldn’t stop calling you over trivial things.”

“Of course not, you misunderstood the situation, that’s all.”

“Oh, really?” his tone heavy with sarcasm. “Then why when I offered to help you with the file boxes did he say it wasn’t necessary and started flexing his muscles in front of you?”

“That’s ridiculous.”

“Is it?” Taehyung raised his voice this time, the control he was trying to maintain fading away. “Don’t you remember at the Christmas party when he pointed to the mistletoe over his head as if I wasn’t even freaking there? Or when he walked you to the door of the apartment and gave you a kiss on the cheek? And what about when he said his dog considered you his other dad because he saw you so much?”

Seokjin felt heat rising to his face, his patience wearing thin. “Aren’t you doing the same with Woo-shik?” he blurted out, angry. “Do you think I didn’t hear when you told your coworkers that if you weren’t with me, you would definitely have made him your damn boyfriend?”

“That wasn’t true, I just wanted you to react!” Taehyung raised his voice, desperate.

“That doesn’t make it better!” Seokjin shouted back. “Every time you’re with him, you act like he’s the person you want to be with. You post him on your social media, you go do hundreds of things together, you even organized a trip, and do you know how I found out? Because I had to check your damn Instagram photos! You didn’t even have the decency to tell me.”

The echo of their voices filled the apartment, the words heavy with resentment floating in the air, hurting both of them with each phrase.

“As if you were going to listen to me anyway! All you’ve done these months is avoid me!” Taehyung’s voice resonated with a mix of pain and frustration.

“Then how do you want me not to do it if all we do is argue!?” Seokjin shot back, his voice rising in a storm of contained emotions.

“We’re supposed to be a couple and we need to fix things, not run from each other!” Taehyung’s tone broke, exposing the hidden pain behind his words. “I’ve tried to fix everything, and all you do is ignore me!”

“Do you think I haven’t tried!? I’ve gone to every single thing you asked me, I’ve done everything you wanted, and it’s still not enough! What more do you want from me!?” Seokjin’s desperation vibrated in every word, his patience exhausted.

“That you try a little harder!” the younger shouted, his voice almost pleading, as if that were the only answer that could save them.

“More!? I can’t do more…” Seokjin’s voice broke too, vulnerability finally exposed. “I’m exhausted, Tae. Everything you want, I can’t give it to you. Believe me, I try and try, but I’m already at my limit.”

Taehyung scoffed, incredulous. “If you wanted to, you would.”

The silence that followed was heavy, laden with unspoken words. Seokjin looked him in the eyes, his resolve taking shape. “I don’t want to do it anymore.”

“What?”

“I don’t want to. This is enough for me. If you want something more, find it in someone else. I’m leaving.”

The words floated in the air like a final sentence. That night, Seokjin ignored every call and message from Taehyung. He couldn’t face him anymore, he didn’t want to. In his mind, he had made a decision. And with silent steps, he headed towards the only light shining through the darkness: Jungkook.

Jungkook welcomed him with open arms, his presence warm like a refuge in the midst of the storm. Seokjin cried on his shoulder, shedding every tear for a relationship he felt had failed. And Jungkook was there, listening silently, as if his ears could absorb all the pain Seokjin carried with him.

He made sakura tea, delicate and fragrant, to try to calm his nerves. He whispered that it was okay to take a break, that he was enough just as he was. Between bad jokes and a portrait of his smile, Jungkook picked up each broken piece of Seokjin, patiently, tenderly. And that night, for the first time in a long time, he slept in peace, held by someone who embraced him without expectations, just with that feeling in his chest that he didn’t dare name.

The next day, Seokjin arrived at his apartment at a time he knew Taehyung wouldn’t be there. However, his surprise was great when he found him sprawled on the couch, surrounded by several empty beer cans and an open bottle of whiskey. The scene made him stop in his tracks, his heart racing with concern.

"Jinnie?" Taehyung's voice was raspy, as if his throat were dry and sore. His eyes, red and swollen, revealed how many tears he'd shed. "Are you home already?"

Seokjin quickly approached upon seeing him in that state, his concern growing as he noticed that Taehyung looked like he was about to vomit. "Tae, what the hell? Why did you drink so much?"

"You know the answer..." Taehyung muttered, leaning against Seokjin's arms, seeking support. "You left. You abandoned me and ignored me all night. I called your parents, your brother, Namjoon... No one knew where you were."

Seokjin felt a knot form in his stomach as he tried to find the words. In the end, he softly let the truth slip out. "...I was at Jungkook's place."

Taehyung's body immediately tensed in Seokjin's arms. "I figured," he whispered, "but I would've preferred to hear something else." His dry lips trembled as he met Seokjin's gaze. "Don't leave me, love. Please."

"Tae..." Seokjin began, but Taehyung didn’t let him continue.

"Please, just... please, let's try one last time, okay? I know we said hurtful things yesterday, but we can fix it. I know we can. Please."

The silence that followed was almost unbearable. Seokjin, with his heart torn, looked at Taehyung, who was pleading, clinging to him. The words were stuck in his throat. Could they really try again after everything they had said?

"Look at everything we've been through. Do you think it's worth throwing it all away?" Taehyung continued, his voice cracking with desperation. "All relationships go through this; let's not let it tear us apart."

Seokjin watched him, his heart pounding with a mix of guilt and sadness. Finally, he gave in when Taehyung clung to him, crying intensely. Between sobs, the younger man confessed that he wouldn't be able to live without him, that his life would be incomplete, that if Seokjin left, a part of him would die forever.

So there they were, trying to find a way through the fog, attempting to move forward. But deep down, Seokjin couldn't stop thinking about Jungkook. He repeated it in his mind like a mantra, an affirmation he hoped he'd eventually believe: "It's just a crush. It's just a fleeting infatuation." He kept trying to convince himself, over and over, that what he felt for Jungkook was nothing more than a passing attraction, something that would fade with time.

But with each passing day, that lie became heavier, harder to bear. Jungkook wasn’t just a pretty boy who made him blush with a smile. No. Jungkook made him feel like he was unraveling cosmic mysteries, as if every glance, every word shared between them was a key to unlocking emotions Seokjin didn’t even know existed.

He was falling, hopelessly, into an attraction that consumed him, an attraction that, no matter how much he tried to ignore, he couldn’t deny. Because while with Taehyung he felt trapped in a spiral, drowning and motionless at the bottom of the dense sea, with Jungkook, everything felt new, bright, and full of promise.

And, somehow, Seokjin knew that Jungkook felt it too. The way he looked at him, as if he were the center of his universe. The way he got nervous when they worked together, his skin flushing at the slightest compliment from Seokjin. The little drawings left on his desk, those silent gestures that spoke louder than a thousand words. The outings they shared, moments that began to feel like more than just casual hangouts.

Everything, everything started to feel like love. A chaotic, infinite love that reminded him what it was like to feel alive again after so long trapped in the pain of inadequacy. It was like a rebirth, like falling in love for the first time again.

Until that day came.

"I like you, Jinnie," Jungkook confessed, his voice trembling, full of vulnerability. "I like you a lot."

And what Seokjin did afterward, he always knew it was wrong. He has always known. But that kiss… that kiss they shared still fills him with warmth when he remembers it. It was like igniting a spark in a cold, dark space, illuminating his entire being. It was magical. Because, after so much time, for the first time in years, he didn’t feel suffocated. He didn’t feel like he was drowning in the sea. He felt light, floating, as if he could finally breathe again.

At that moment, he knew, with a sharp pain in his chest, that he had to break up with Taehyung. Not because Jungkook was the reason, but because the emptiness he felt could no longer be hidden. What had once been love was now just a shadow, and there was no way to bring it back to life.

The day Seokjin decided it was time to end everything, Taehyung went on a trip. He said it was for something of great importance, but didn’t give any more details, and Seokjin didn’t get the chance to talk to him before he left. He tried calling him, sending messages, doing anything to keep in touch, but Taehyung didn’t respond. 

Jungkook, realizing the situation, offered to wait. He said there was no rush, but the tension between them began to overflow. Desire, guilt, anguish… everything built up, and one day, when Seokjin accompanied him to his apartment, he gave in.

The kiss between them was inevitable, like a dam finally breaking under pressure. What had been held back for so long simply exploded. It was passionate, full of everything they couldn’t say in words. And even though he knew it was wrong, Seokjin didn’t stop. That night was the beginning of the end.

When Taehyung returned from his trip, Seokjin knew. He knew by the way Taehyung looked at him, by the emptiness in his eyes that gave him away. He already knew everything; there was no need to ask. But it was Seokjin who spoke first.

“Let’s end this,” he said bluntly, without hesitation. He knew there was no other way.

“No,” Taehyung replied firmly.

“Tae…” Seokjin tried, his voice softer.

“No!” exclaimed the man, his voice full of a mixture of desperation and anger. “This isn’t just your relationship, Seokjin, it’s ours. And I don’t agree, I won’t let this happen. You said we’d try.”

The older man looked at him, feeling the words get stuck in his throat, but Taehyung wasn’t finished.

“You can’t do this to me, not after everything we’ve been through together. We have a future ahead of us, can’t you see that? We have dreams, promises, and I’m not going to let you throw it all away. You won’t!” 

The anger in his words echoed in the air, but behind that anger was pain, a deep pain that Seokjin could see reflected in every gesture, in every broken word. And yet, he knew he couldn’t go back. He knew it wasn’t fair to Taehyung or to himself to continue a relationship that was already dead, no matter how painful it was to admit.

“Taehyung, we’ve been broken for a long time… This can’t continue, we’re hurting each other,” said Seokjin, his voice filled with a mix of desperation and sadness.

But the younger man shook his head again, his eyes full of anguish. “No. No. No. You gave up, but I haven’t, and I won’t. I know you love me, I know you do… you just need to remember.”

Seokjin swallowed the lump in his throat. “I love you, Tae, I do, but not as a partner. Not enough to give you the future you want.”

“Then I’ll give it up,” Taehyung responded, a thread of hope in his voice. “We don’t need to have kids, or a house, or a dog. None of that matters if we can be together. I won’t even talk to Woo-shik again.”

The older man closed his eyes for a moment, trying to calm the pain he felt seeing Taehyung so broken. “Can’t you see that isn’t love?” he exclaimed in desperation. “You can’t pretend that giving up everything you once wanted for me is love. It’s not enough.”

“Those dreams don’t mean anything if they’re not with you,” he replied, his voice breaking.

“Tae, please, don’t do this to yourself,” Seokjin pleaded.

“No,” the younger man insisted, shaking his head again. “I… I know you love me. I know it.”

“Tae…”

“It wouldn’t make sense if you didn’t.”

“Tae…”

“You were the first to say it! You were the one who loved me first! You can’t leave me like this!” Taehyung shouted, his hands trembling along with the rest of his body.

And then, in a moment of raw truth, Seokjin let out what he had tried to repress for so long.

“I fell in love with someone else!”

The silence that followed was torturous. Taehyung stared at him, his eyes full of disbelief, as if the words he had just heard couldn’t be real. But they were. They were, and the weight of that truth settled between them like an impenetrable barrier that neither of them could break down.

“W-what?” the younger man stammered, his voice broken with disbelief. “W-what are you talking about?”

Seokjin felt the tears burning his eyes, slipping uncontrollably. “I’m sorry,” he murmured between sobs, “I’m really so sorry… I don’t know how it happened, I don’t even know if I really tried to stop it, but… it happened, and I… that person likes me too…”

The younger man, still trembling in disbelief, clenched his fists, his voice shaky. “Is it Jungkook?”

“…Yes.”

Taehyung looked at him, his face falling apart, searching Seokjin for something that would disprove it. But the silence that followed was the most painful confirmation. “Did you kiss?” he asked in a dull tone, though the sharpness of his question cut through the air.

The older man nodded, lowering his gaze, unable to hold it, feeling small, crushed under the weight of his betrayal.

“Did you sleep together?”

The question wasn’t just a scream, it was an explosion of fury, of desperation, as if Taehyung clung to the last hope of a truth that might somehow mend what was already broken. But there was no turning back.

Seokjin felt his heart pounding violently in his chest, the echo of guilt resonating in his mind. He took a few seconds, as if the world had stopped, and finally, he nodded. With that small gesture, everything collapsed. The silence that followed was overwhelming, crushing, like an invisible weight that fell on both of them, stealing their breath.

“How… how could you do this to us?” Taehyung’s voice was no more than a broken whisper, filled with disbelief and pain. The words pierced Seokjin like knives, embedding themselves deep into his soul, where the guilt had already been gnawing at him for a long time.

Taehyung’s devastated look haunted him for months after that day. Seokjin remembered every detail, the exact moment when the expression of the man he had loved shattered. Taehyung left the apartment without saying another word, without even looking at him one last time.

The emptiness he left behind was unbearable. Days went by without hearing anything from him. Seokjin tried to contact him, calling and sending desperate messages, every word a plea, a supplication. “Please, don’t make the wrong decision,” he told him, though deep down he knew he had made all the wrong decisions. But he got no response, not a single sign of life from Taehyung. The anxiety grew, fueled by messages from his brothers and parents, asking if he had heard anything from him. The guilt crushed him, weighing him down every time he saw Taehyung’s name on his phone, followed by deafening silence.

On the fourth day, the door opened.

But it wasn’t just Taehyung who came back.

He walked in accompanied by the one person who had such a strong influence over Seokjin that, even after all these years, could still make him falter: his mother.

She entered first, her expression impeccable as always. The face of a woman accustomed to perfection, with that stern calm that could make anyone shrink under her gaze. Taehyung, without saying a word, walked straight to his room, leaving them alone in the living room.

Seokjin stood frozen in the doorway, feeling like the air was being sucked from his lungs. He knew what was about to happen. Taehyung knew that vulnerable part of him, the part that had always struggled to please his mother, the part that had given up his dreams of becoming an actor to meet the expectations of a "more honorable" career. She had been there, watching, ensuring that everything he did met a standard he never quite seemed able to reach.

And Taehyung knew. He knew how fragile Seokjin became when his mother was around. He knew how she had shaped much of his life, how she had influenced his appearance, his behavior—everything—so he could fit into the image she had of him. Taehyung knew that his mother was the only person capable of completely unraveling him.

The woman stood in the center of the room, her posture rigid and authoritative. Seokjin couldn’t meet her gaze. He couldn’t bear the disappointment he was sure he’d see in her eyes.

“Seokjin,” she began, her voice firm and controlled. “We need to talk.”

And at that moment, Seokjin realized that Taehyung had played his final card.

He felt his stomach churn as he sat down across from his mother. The room, though familiar, was heavy with tension. She stared at him, her gaze cold and calculating, as if she were analyzing him, searching for every flaw, every weakness.

"Taehyung told me you want to end your relationship because you've... fallen for a nobody."

The sentence landed heavily, like a final judgment. Seokjin opened his mouth to protest, but his mother raised a hand, demanding silence.

"How can you be so inconsiderate? So stupid as to throw away a relationship you've built for years? Do you really think this Jungkook will give you what Taehyung can?" 

“This isn’t about that,” Seokjin replied, though even to himself, his words sounded weak.

“Then what is it about?” she asked, the question a cold, unyielding trap.

He lowered his gaze, struggling to find the right words. “Things with Taehyung just don’t work anymore, Mom. I can’t love him the same way, but with Jungkook… he makes me feel something I thought I’d lost.”

His mother’s expression hardened, and when she spoke again, her tone dripped with sarcasm. “With him? Just because you slept together once, you think you should leave your partner? I thought you were better than that. Are you really that easy?”

Her words pierced his heart like a dagger. He felt the air leave his lungs, crushed under the weight of her disappointment.

“Give it three months,” she continued, her voice unforgiving. “Until he gets bored of you and moves on to someone else who’ll spread their legs as easily as you did.”

Seokjin blinked, trying to hold back the tears that threatened to spill. Every word was like a blow, a direct hit to his self-esteem, to the guilt he already carried.

“Do you think you’ll be able to handle that?” His mother tilted her head, her eyes filled with disapproval. “Knowing you let go of a man who loved you unconditionally for a stranger. What will you do when he leaves you, and you realize what you’ve lost?”

“That… that won’t happen,” he replied, though his voice wavered slightly.

“Don’t be naïve, Seokjin,” his mother interrupted, her tone harsh and her brow deeply furrowed. “Do you really think a young, attractive man will stay with someone older who also betrayed his first partner? Don’t make me laugh.”

He felt the weight of each word, as if they were trying to crush him under the shadow of his own remorse. “Jungkook isn’t like that, you don’t know him.”

“I don’t need to know him,” she replied with chilling coldness. “Because I know I’m right. When you get bored of him or when you feel you no longer love him, will you leave him too? Will you go after another man? Is that what you’ve become now?”

Seokjin clenched his fists on his lap, feeling the cold sweat running down his back. It wasn’t the first time his mother had made him feel small, but this time the words cut deeper because they touched the raw nerve of his own uncertainty. What if she was right? What if Jungkook did abandon him one day? What if he was just repeating a cycle of mistakes he’d never learn how to break?

“That’s not true…” he murmured, but even to him, his words sounded uncertain.

His mother leaned forward, her gaze condescending. “It’s not a matter of whether it’s true or not, Seokjin. It’s a matter of time. You’ll regret it, and when you do, there will be no turning back. No forgiveness, no second chances.”

Those last words echoed in his mind, tormenting him, as the shadow of guilt and fear enveloped him more than ever. What would he do if everything fell apart?

His mother’s voice, relentless and cruel, reverberated in his mind, making him question everything. The doubts that had already haunted him before that conversation now consumed him completely. What if she was right? What if he was making the worst mistake of his life?

“Oh, and if you still decide to go with that boy, don’t bother coming back to my house because you’ll no longer have a family.”

Her words echoed over and over in his head, crushing like a hammer, destroying any hope Seokjin had left. It was as if the last refuge he had was also crumbling. And in that moment, he knew the decision was no longer his. There was no way he could leave Taehyung, not when the threat of losing his family loomed over him like an inescapable shadow. The guilt, the duty, the love he once felt—all of it tied him, chained him to a relationship that now brought him nothing but pain, but that was now his only option.

That Monday, with his heart bleeding, Seokjin arrived at work. His steps were heavy, his gaze lost. Everything he had wanted felt distant, blurred, as he walked down the hallway until he finally met Jungkook, who was waiting for him with an expression of clear concern.

"Yeobo," Jungkook's voice was filled with anguish, his eyes searching for answers on Seokjin’s face. "What happened? You didn’t answer my calls or messages. I was worried."

Seokjin swallowed hard, feeling reality hit him. Every word he wanted to say stuck in his throat. How could he explain to Jungkook that, after everything, there was no escape, no place for them? How could he look into those hopeful eyes and tell him that everything they had shared, everything they had started to build, was crumbling?

"We need to talk, Kookie." His voice came out broken, filled with sadness, almost inaudible.

Jungkook looked at him closely, fear beginning to show in his eyes. "Jin... What's happening? Why are you talking like this?"

Seokjin took a deep breath, trying to maintain his composure as he felt everything inside him shatter. "I’m so sorry, so sorry," he whispered, his voice trembling. "I can't go on... I can't leave Taehyung."

The silence that followed was devastating, heavy with pain, as Jungkook tried to process what he had just heard. The younger man’s eyes, filled with disbelief, began to swell up with tears, and Seokjin knew that in that moment, he was breaking more than just an unkept promise—he was breaking both of their hearts.

But there was no turning back. Not this time.

Jungkook looked at him, trying to cling to any hope, any word that could contradict what he had just heard. His lips trembled before he asked the question he feared most.

"What do you mean, Jinnie? I thought… I thought we were going to be together. That you felt the same way about me." The younger man’s voice was a whisper, barely contained by the lump in his throat.

Seokjin closed his eyes for a moment, feeling his heart shatter into a thousand pieces. Every word from Jungkook was a direct hit to his chest.

"I... I'm so sorry, Kookie. This isn’t fair to you, but I can’t do it. I can’t lose my family." He could barely keep his voice steady, broken and heavy with guilt.

Jungkook took a step towards him, his gaze vulnerable and pleading. "You don’t have to lose them... You don’t have to lose anything. We can find a way, we can make it work, together." His hands sought Seokjin’s, holding them as if that could stop the inevitable. "Don’t leave me, please."

Tears began to well up in Seokjin’s eyes. He looked at Jungkook, feeling the warmth of his hands—the same hands that had given him so much comfort, so much hope. But he knew there was no way to hold onto that reality, to live that life without destroying everything else.

"It’s more complicated than that, Jungkook." He tried to pull his hands away, but the younger man held on tighter, refusing to let go. "My family... my mother... they’ll leave me if I stay with you. And even if we try, even if we want to fight against everything, I can’t live knowing that I’ve left behind the people who have supported me my whole life."

The silence that followed was deafening, Jungkook’s ragged breathing the only sound filling the space. Seokjin could see how the pain began to consume the younger man, how his hope slowly faded.

"Does that mean... that you're choosing to stay with him?" Jungkook finally asked, his voice broken, his eyes now filled with tears that fell uncontrollably. "Despite what we feel? Despite everything we’ve been through?"

Seokjin looked at him, tears streaming down his own face. There was no answer that could ease Jungkook’s suffering, no words that could calm his own conscience.

"I’m sorry," was all he could say.

Jungkook let go of his hands as if the touch had started to burn him. He took a step back, unable to contain the sobs that overcame him.

"This can’t be happening... Jin, please. Don’t do this to me." But he already knew the answer. He saw it in Seokjin’s eyes, in the way he couldn’t hold his gaze for long, in the silence that followed his plea.

Seokjin watched him, broken inside, but knowing he couldn’t change what he had just done. He took a step back, wanting to comfort Jungkook but knowing that any gesture would only make things worse.

"I love you, Kookie... but I can’t do this."

With those final words, he turned away, walking away from the person who had made his world shine again, leaving behind everything that could have been. And with each step he took, he felt himself slipping further from the life he had wanted and sinking deeper into an ocean that suffocated him more and more.