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Chapter Text

SPOILER ALERT: Spoils Infinity Saga (MCU) and Era 1&2 of Mistborn (The Final Empire to Bands of Mourning) (MAJOR SPOILERS FOR BANDS OF MOURNING)

The after-credit scene ended and I stood, turning off the TV and walking into the kitchen. Thor: Ragnarok would always be one of my favorites- Loki and Thor bonding was always so fun. It was so much better than watching, for example, Endgame and remembering that Tony Stark and Natasha Romanoff died. At least Loki would get a TV series since he messed with the Sacred Timeline.

I strolled over to the fridge, opening it and examining the contents of it for anything edible. As I scoured the fridge, I heard the door open and smiled to myself. 

My older brother, Connor, had come all the way from Kingston to watch me today, as my parents were out on a date. Connor was cool, and he visited way more than Dylan or Mike. Connor's girlfriend, Nora, had come with him which was so cool. She was super nice, and sometimes would help me bake. 

They'd been in a relationship since high school, and after Connor got his PhD we all suspected they would get married- 'we all' being me, Dylan, and Mike. 

I heard footsteps and turned around, grinning as I saw Connor holding Spook in a cradle position, stroking the gray cat's fur while Nora made eye contact with me and we both smirked. Connor's a huge cat person- one of the reasons we got Spook was because Connor persuaded Mom that cats were amazing and fabulous. He also introduced me to Mistborn, which had been introduced to him in turn by Nora (the woman had fabulous taste), hence the name of the cat. 

Connor looked up and rolled his eyes at the twin looks of amusement on Nora and I's faces.

"What? Spook is a magnificent cat, his fur is sleek and his eyes are a brilliant shade of green- stop laughing at me!" 

Nora picked Spook up out of Connor's arms, causing the cat to meow, and placed Spook on the ground. "Connor, we're here to watch your sister, not the cat." I snickered, then walked towards Connor, hugging him. "Hi Connor, how's PhD-ing doing?" Connor's arms wrapped around me as he replied, giving me a squeeze and releasing me to grin down at me. "Artie, stop calling it PhD-ing-" "-But its funny to see you annoyed!" "-but anyway, I'm doing well. Soon you'll be calling me Dr. Winters!" 

I poked him in the chest. "Dylan and I are gonna get you apple pie to celebrate when that happens. And apple keychains. And give Nora apple perfume. And get you an apple t-shirt." Connor rolled his eyes. "You do not need to take that saying that seriously, I swear! I'm not that type of doctor!" 

I gave him a look. "Did you just quote Bruce Banner?"

Nora cleared her throat and we both looked over at her sheepishly. "So, Artemis, I hope you like pizza because that's what Connor and I got on the way here." I gave Nora a thumbs up. "I do like pizza." Connor placed a pizza box on the counter, and opened the lid, moving to take a slice before Nora's scorching glare stopped him in his tracks. 

I turned to grab some plastic plates for the pizza, hiding my snickers. Nora was awesome. I fully approved their relationship- Mike liked to call them 'Cora', acting like they were a ship from a book or movie. 

I put the plates down, taking a peek at the pizza box's contents while passing it. Pepperoni pizza? As Eve would say, slay. I grabbed two slices and put them in Nora's plate, passing it over to her and putting two in my own plate. I picked off a pepperoni and placed it dead center in Connor's plate, handing it to him with a deadpan expression.

"Here you go, Connor-" I broke off into laughter at the ridiculous look on Connor's face, a mix between bemusement and annoyance. Nora leaned over and placed two more slices on his plate, giving his cheek a quick kiss. I made a gagging sound. "Too much PDA! My eyes!" Connor gave my shoulder a light shove. "Can it Artie!" I giggled and leaned against the counter, taking a bite of the pizza.

"So, Artemis, how's school?" Nora asked, giving me a warm smile. "Oh, school's great. Really fun. Like, better than last year. So better. Like, all my teachers are super cool and always tell us about our homework ahead of time, and like the drama is off my friend group which is great, but there's still plenty of stuff going on. Levi- you know Levi, my friend who likes Beetlejuice way too much- yeah Levi's dating someone and he won't tell us who and Eve is trying to find out. Y'know, typical middle school stuff." I replied, taking a bite of the pizza.

Connor gave me a mischievous look. "Are you dating someone?" I scowled at him. "Connor, I'm thirteen, I'm like way too young to date someone!" Connor just laughed at my face. Annoying older brothers. I would know, I've got three of the blighters.

"Did you finish Bands of Mourning?" Nora asked. "Oh, yeah, it was fire. But it wasn't like a shocker to see that Telsin would betray them. But Bands of Mourning was so good." I said.

Nora smiled. "I'm going to have to get you The Lost Metal. It's the next book in the series." 

Connor cleared his throat. "So, Artie, d'ya have homework? 'Cause if not, I think we should watch Ironman 1 again. For like, the nostalgia." I considered it, then shrugged. "Yeah, I don't have homework. Ironman sounds like a plan." I glanced at my phone then looked back up. "Lemme go upstairs and finish my drawing first, then I'll come down and watch Ironman with you two." 

We continued eating, Connor finishing first by literally stuffing the pizza into his mouth to which Nora sighed good-naturedly. Taking the last bite of my crust, I stacked his paper plate and mine on top of each other and carried it to the trash, tossing it in. Nora handed me hers and I threw it out as well. "Alright, I'll be down in ten minutes." I said, mostly to Connor as I turned to go upstairs. 

I climbed the stairs, feeling a buzz in my pocket and pulling out my phone to see that Levi had just texted in the group chat.

levisnotawake: I SHOT HIM IN ZE LEGS BECAUSE HIS SHIELD IS ZE SIZE OF A DINNER PLATE AND HE IS AN IDIOT

I snickered, turning off my phone as I reached the second floor. I walked into my room, closing the door behind me and strolling over to my desk where an almost-finished fanart of a stereotypical IronDad and SpiderSon pairing lay. I had promised Evelyn that I'd finish her art- it was just coloring at this point.

I pulled out my AirPods and put them in my ears, sitting down and propping up my phone against a stack of books. I turned on my phone and found my drawing playlist and clicked shuffle. 'Mirrors' by Justin Timberlake began to play- not my favorite, but hey, this was my friend's playlist, who was I to judge-, and I began to color in the last of the drawing.

Around two or three song changes later, I heard a muffled shout of 'ARTIE!' from downstairs and stood, pulling out my earbuds and putting them inside the AirPod case (because honestly if you don't do that you're a monster). I set my pencil down.

"COMING, CONNOR!" I yelled, picking up my phone. I walked down the stairs, pulling out my phone as Eve sent an meme explaining why Bucky Barnes was a Disney Princess.

EVETHELEAV: nonono think about it guys reed the meme
levisnotawake: princess bucky heronin of frozen 3

I quickly sent a text to the chat.

mOOnY: heronin

I grinned as replies came in instantly.

levisnotawake: heroine
EVETHELEAV: heroin
mOOnY: captain murica disapproves of drugs guys
EVETHELEAV: y did he take the serum then
levisnotawake: fax

As I reached the floor where Connor and Nora were on, I stumbled as a flash of green light blinded me. For a solid four seconds, it was all I could see. I must have fallen or something because the next thing I knew I was lying on the floor, phone about a foot from my hand. 

That was bloody concerning. Was I getting like seizures or something? Didn't guys with seizures get flashes of light? Or was that just fainting spells? Was I dehydrated or something?

I pocketed my phone as I walked into the kitchen, rubbing my head. "Connor, d'ya know what medical condition or illness gives you weird..." I trailed off as I saw Connor was just standing there, facing away from me. "Connor?" He didn't move. I walked over to him and tapped his shoulder. No reaction.

"Uh... what?" I walked around to see his face and gasped. Connor's eyes were open, and looked perfectly normal... if you counted looking like he was frozen in time normal. 

I turned towards the living room and gasped. Nora was... well, frozen in place, in the middle of walking towards Connor, mouth halfway open and the remote in her hands. Added to the horror-movie type scene was Spook, the cat frozen in midair. I think I can be pardoned for the quick "what the fu-" that slipped out of my mouth. 

I pulled out my phone in a panic, taking a quick photo of Connor and Nora in their frozen forms and sending it to the chat.

mOOnY: guys guys guys @EVETHELEAV @levisnotawake do you see this guys what the hell is this
mOOnY: guys
mOOnY: @EVETHELEAV @levisnotawake @EVETHELEAV @levisnotawake @EVETHELEAV @levisnotawake
mOOnY: this isn't funny guys answer NOW guys
mOOnY: GUYS

No response.

I whipped my head up, hoping Nora, Connor and Spook had moved, that this was a prank, literally anything. But they were all frozen, like statues from the MET or something. My mind immediately pulled up Aru Shah and the End of Time, 'cause that's exactly what it looked like. As many times as I had wished I was in a magic-type situation, this was just so weird and, alright, scary! 

A low humming had begun to invade my senses. It made me feel like I was vibrating or something. My teeth were on edge, like I was freezing and my teeth were chattering but without the chattering. I looked towards where the humming was coming from and gaped. Right outside the porch door, on the porch, was a Doctor Strange-esque circle, except it was Space Stone blue. 

Oh hell naw. 

I turned back to Connor, Nora and Spook, another wedge of hope dying as they hadn't moved. Unless...

I shoved Connor. No movement. Like he was freaking stone or something. Same when I poked Spook with the tip of my foot. I tried to pull the remote out of Nora's hands, but it was stuck. Like, I could move the remove but Nora's hands were keeping it trapped, even though she was holding it in the loosest way possible. I glanced at the blue swirly circle again, and in the fading light could've sworn it was glowing.

Glowing.

Like I expected anything else.

I checked my phone again. No response from the group chat. I went to my contacts for my mom and dad.

mOOnY: mom dad connor spook and nora are frozen @dad @mom @mom @dad
mOOnY: mom momomomomom MOM @mom @mom @mom
mOOnY: daaaddadadadadad answerrrrrrrrrrr GUYS THEY ARE FROZNE ND NOT MOVING @dad @dad @dad

I slammed my phone on the counter, already suspecting there would be no response. There hadn't been one from my friends, and they were constantly on their phones. Most likely scenario was that every freaking person was frozen, like Aru Shah. Just. My. Luck.

I eyed the blue circle outside. It would be likely that I'd have to go through it and complete some godforsaken quest to save my family and friends. Wasn't that what happened in every single freaking book? Sounded like a shi- a cra- a really bad fanfiction storyline, but everyone was frozen around me, and a freaky blue portal-thingy was on my porch!

Besides, it wasn't looking like Connor, Nora, or Spook were going to be un-frozen any time soon. And if I was right, and nobody was answering because they were also frozen, maybe I could... I dunno. Be a hero?

But then again, I could get majorly fucked up by going through. Death? Getting stuck in a random part of space? Go to another universe- now this sounded cool. I would kill to be in the Cosmere. But I would also kill to get everything freaking returned to normal, 'cause this was terrifying.

But what could I do here? Even if there were other people that weren't frozen, there wouldn't be much I could do. So... portal?

Another quick glance at Connor made me make up my mind. There wasn't a freaking way I would not try to help him.

Besides, Connor would kill me if he knew I had the opportunity to go through a glowing portal and didn't.

So I checked my phone one last time and ran upstairs to get changed because no way was I going to go out into the unknown in a fuzzy pajama shirt and bright red sweatpants. That would just be sad.

I scoured through my own clothes, pulling out a pair of jeans and my (admittedly only) long sleeved shirt, which was a more russet-y color than anything. I searched for a jacket, but the only thing I could find was my old green zip-up hoodie that was thinner than paper. 

I turned and ran into my mom and dad's room- I'd seen my mom wear this tan jacket that was like, really thick once, and she was my size anyway so I kinda assumed it would fit. I rummaged through her clothes, but couldn't find it. She probably wore it on her date, as it was her favorite.

"Damn it," I hissed, eyeing the clothes. Then an idea came to me. I began looking again, and quickly found it- a black leather jacket, one of Mom's old ones. It wasn't as sturdy as the tan jacket, but like, all the gangsters in movies wore them and it didn't feel flimsy at all, so I guessed it would hold up better than anything else.

Besides, it looked cool.

I ran back downstairs, avoiding looking at my cat, Nora or Connor, and opened the pantry, pulling out four bottles of water. Like hell if I was going to go through that goofy ahh blue circle without stuff.

I also found a box of granola- hey, fiber's good- and to my surprise, behind the really old waffle maker, a Swiss Army Knife. Huh. I pocketed the knife.

I turned around, looking for anything I could use as a bag. I saw Nora's bag (no), a few grocery bags (maybe, they were pretty sturdy 'cause we bought them after Covid, and the stores sold really tough bags nowdays), and one tiny brown drawstring bag (no). Grocery bag it was then.

I walked over to the couch and picked up the largest bag there was (not much bigger than the others) and placed the water and granola inside of it. Maybe I would immediately find somewhere to eat and drink, but I preferred to be semi-prepared at least. This would last me two days at most. 

Shit. I was really unprepared for this, wasn't I?

I turned back to Connor, Nora and Spook, still feeling a stinging feeling in my chest every time I looked at them- gods, Artie, get a grip -, and gave them a little wave. "Bye guys, uh. Hope you stay, uh, well? I'll be back, hopefully."

I walked to the porch door, using my left hand to open it, and walked outside. The blue circle was still humming, making my bones feel like they were vibrating.

"Alright, here I go." I took a deep breath, then stepped into the portal.

Instantly my world was in turmoil. Everything was blue, all shades of blue, like Coraline's tunnel except it was tossing me around like a leaf in the wind. I yelped as my bag was torn away from me, and vanished in the blue. Was this what people felt like when they were in a hurricane, because this was-

The blue vanished suddenly and I felt myself falling through air, and I could see the sky, and-

Wham! 

My back hit the ground, a really hard ground and it hurt, gods, but not like I'm going to dieee hurt. The wind was knocked out of me and for a moment I just lay there, staring at the sky.

Then I heard a noise I thought I'd never hear in person.

Repulsor thrusters.

Chapter Text

Wanda had been in many situations. Felt many emotions.

Death wasn't new to her. Loss? Too painful and close, but had happened. Regret? Oh yes, regret. Much of it. Guilt?

Well, let's just say that she was lucky to have F.R.I.D.A.Y. to monitor her. And beyond lucky that the group of superheroes that she had attacked and assaulted with some of the most disturbing things she could bring up were nice enough to give her a second chance and let her join them. Nice, because that was a good word to describe most of them. 

But this child was a new situation.

It had been a peaceful morning- well, peaceful enough. Clint had been talking to Nat about who knows what, Stark had been down in his lab, doing something, and Vision had been talking to F.R.I.D.A.Y. about how to make tea. 

But it was all interrupted when Stark rushed into the kitchen, followed closely by Ms. Potts. Apparently there had been a surge of energy exactly like the Tesseract, in Central Park, NYC, New York, and Director Fury had ordered the Avengers to assemble and get to the location as soon as possible. This information was verified as Steve ran into the room, suited up, and told them that they had to get to Central Park immediately. Clint had gone pale, and so had the others. Wanda suspected it was because of the Battle of New York, when Loki had invaded.

She had heard, through what remained of S.H.I.E.L.D, that Clint had been mind controlled by an alien prince named Loki, the brother of Thor, using the scepter. Loki had also had the tesseract. If it was Loki... 

They had suited up and Stark had used his suits to fly them there quicker. It was coming from North Meadow, and they landed, faintly seeing a glowing blue thing in the sky that vanished quickly. Stark began flying ahead, telling them he would go investigate.

Wanda stuck with Vision, as they approached. And saw the most bizarre sight.

A child, truly, not a day older than fifteen at the most was lying on the grass. She had light brown chin-length hair that looked a bit copper in the sunlight, skin tan but not incredibly. She was wearing a black leather jacket over a red shirt, and jeans.

Wanda was pretty sure that Loki did not look like that.

The girl then stood, facing Stark.

Then Wanda made the mistake of reaching out to hear the child's thoughts, to make sure it wasn't just Loki in disguise.

And oh.

Woah is that Tony Stark what the heck this is so cool! OMG OMG OMG what is this?! No don't tell me I'm in the MCU that would be too freakin' weird, but like so cool as well? Uh. So COOL!!!

Wanda winced as the barrage of lighting-fast thoughts, but was far too preoccupied by the content of the girl's thoughts. What was an MCU? Why did the child think she was in this MCU? She didn't sound like she was planning on world domination, that was for sure.

"Wanda? Are you okay?"

When Vision spoke, the girl's thoughts went haywire. If Wanda had thought before was chaotic, this was the epitome of chaos.

WHAT WANDA OH NO I FORGOT ABOUT HER SHE CAN READ MINDS I THINK OR IS THAT JUST FANFICTION OH NO OH NO WANDA IF YOU CAN HEAR ME- OR CAN SHE HEAR ME THIS WOULD BE EMBARRASSING IF SHE COULD JUST ROOT THROUGH MY BRAIN AND PICK AND CHOOSE- THAT WOULD BE TERRIBLE- WANDA IF YOU CAN HERE ME- THIS THREAT IS EMBARRASSING OMFG- IF YOU CAN HEAR ME, IF YOU DON'T GET OUT OF MY BRAIN I WILL TRAUMATIZE YOU BY THINKING OF THE MOST EROTIC FANFICTIONS ABOUT YOUR TEAM POSSIBLE DO NOT UNDERESTIMATE ME WANDA DO NOT- THIS IS SUCH A LAME THREAT BUT I SWEAR I WILL WANDA-

Wanda yanked herself out of the girl's mind, the thoughts far too conflicting for her to make sense of besides the threat- which Wanda wasn't entirely sure what is was, as she had been too focused on the overwhelming thought trains, but knew it was a threat- and raised a hand toward Vision, waving off his concerns

"I'm fine, Vision."

The girl spun around and, to Wanda's surprise, grinned widely.

Huh?

"Oh. My. Fucking. Gods. WANDAVISION 100%!"

What?

Steve cleared his throat. "Uh, miss, could you please tell me your name?"

The girl whipped her head around to look at Steve so quickly that Wanda was half-afraid that she would snap her neck.

"A- And you're Steve Grant Rogers! CAPTAIN AMERICA!!!"

She blinked, shaking her head.

"Wow. Well, uh, I'm Arti- Artemis. Artemis Jones."

The hesitation in her voice made Wanda suspicious, and by a quick glance around the semicircle of heroes, the sentiment was mirrored by the rest of them.

"So, Artemis, could you tell me why we just had a reading of energy exactly like the Tesseract right here, less than five minutes ago?"

Steve's voice was calm and patient, a stark contrast to the readiness in which all the Avengers held themselves, ready to attack. 

"Uh... Tesseract- you mean Space Stone?"

The hell was a Space Stone?

"Sorry, Space Stone?" Steve asked, looking as confused as the rest of them.

"Yea- oh shit I forgot about this..." She trailed off. Clint cleared his throat and spoke, sounding wary. "Kid, were you given the Tesseract by anyone who called himself Loki?" The Avengers all awaited her response, Wanda watching Artemis closely.

And the kid grinned.

"Loki?" She sounded absolutely delighted. "Wait, he's still around? This is before Infinity War?"

Now Wanda was very, very alarmed. Why was the child happy to hear about Loki? And what war? "Artemis, what is Infinity War?" She asked the child, speaking for all the Avengers. The child turned to her, still looking in awe, and responded, almost like she was in a trance,

"Oh, Infinity War is when you die."

What?

Chapter Text

"Oh, Infinity War is when you die."

Yeah, I could have phrased that a little better.

But I was on autopilot, still in awe that there was the legit WandaVision™ in front of me. And Captain America! Whaaat.

I felt like a flux of emotions- one hand, do not wake me up this is sick-  and the other, what the hell?! This felt like a crappy fanfiction that I definitely did not spend all night reading, no sir. But also... the Avengers.

Let me go back through all the events so far. Magic glowing flash goes through house, family (and cat) frozen, goes through portal, falls in grass, sees Avengers.

So forgive me if I was a little less than eloquent.

Around me, the confused, incredulous, and slightly unnerved faces of the Avengers made me wince at my own phrasing. Oh, Infinity War is when you die? Damn, Artie, couldn't have thought of a worse way to freak them out.

"Sorry, sorry, that was bad! My bad! Uh, nonono what I meant was, uh, in Infinity War, you don't die, you get turned to dust!"

Wanda looked pale, and honestly? I couldn't blame her. If a random kid showed up at my house after falling out of a portal, referenced a war that I had never heard about, and told me I would die... yeah, I would also be pale.

"Kid? Care to elaborate?"

The sound of RDJ- no, Tony Stark's- voice made me giddy again. Like. Whoa. Ironman. He's not dead. Goodbye, Endgame trauma, goodbye!

Wait.

When was I?

I scanned the group of Avengers- Natasha, Clint, Tony, Wanda, Vision, Steve, Rhodey, and Sam. They didn't seem at odds with each other, and most importantly there was no Ant-Man, Spider-Man, or Bucky. Before Civil War, then. And there was Wanda there, so after Age of Ultron. So... 2015, if my memory of the MCU timeline was correct.

And Infinity War was in 2018. I think. So I had three years before The Snap™.

"Kid?"

I jolted back to reality and realized that Tony Stark had asked me a question and was now looking at me concernedly.

"Oh, sorry Tony, got lost there. Uh. Yeah. Uh. What was the question?"

Tony? C'mon, me, I can't just be calling adults by their first names! Even if I've only known them by their first names, now that they're real I can't be doing that! 

"Wanna explain what you mean by get turned to dust, kid, 'cause I think Sabrina over here's going to faint if you don't explain," Tony said, focusing on me waay more now. 

Oh yeah, I did say that.

Congratulations, Artie, you've screwed up! Now it's time to think of an excellent way to explain this without freaking anyone out.

"Uh... turned to dust? What, I never said that, nooo, what's a dust?"

Shit.

In the corner of my eye I saw Natasha wince and Steve stifle a laugh. Shiiiiiiiiit.

"...should we take her in?" Clint said, looking concerned and suspicious. "Wanda, is she working for Loki?"

Why would they think- ohhh. Yeah. The glow-y portal I just went through. Like Loki did coming through to Earth? Is that why they think I'm with Loki? I mean, that would be cool- wait.

WANDA DO NOT READ MY FUCKING MIND I SWEAR- oh shit oh shit -DO NOT READ MY MIND THAT IS AN INVASION OF PRIVACY AND I DO NOT WANT YOU TO- please no no getout fuck you -I WILL START THINKING OF THE MOST EROTIC FANFICTIONS OF YOUR TEAM EVER- I used that threat already shit lemme go through with this I guess- STEVE MOANED AS TONY SLAMMED INTO HI-

I saw Wanda take a step back, hands to her head and a deep red flush on her cheeks. "She's not working for Loki, Clint," Wanda said, refusing to make eye contact with either Steve or Tony.

Oops. But hey, it got her out of my head!

"Sorry, sorry, sorry Wanda! Just please don't go into my head!"

She nodded, cheeks still red. Vision looked concerned, but Wanda just whispered to him something and he nodded slowly, casting me a look that if he had been more human-like would be scathing.

Uhhh. I may have incited the wrath of Vision?

"All in favor of taking the kid to the compound?" 

There was a general sound of affirmation after Tony's words and I frowned. 

"Wait, I never agreed to thi-"

Aand my vision went dark.

"-appeared there, and-"

"-can't find-"

"-uggest Asga-"

I slowly came to, hearing faint ins and outs of people talking. Ow. I had a killer headache.

Damn. Where was I? Hospital?

Then the events of the past ten minutes came to me- was it ten minutes? I was horrible at telling time.

If my memory served me correctly, I was talking to the Avengers when it all went dark. And judging by my head hurting, I was probably knocked unconscious. Sweet.

Now, don't get me wrong, this was so cool- but honestly? Fuck it. This was maybe my fifth best universe for helping my home out. And that was just 'cause of the Stones. 

"-coming to? Helen, be a dea-"

"-ant full updates, Romanoff, that's not a requ-"

"-d? You there? I'm so bor-"

"-ares if you're bored, Stark, the unk-"

"mleh"

Oh. That was me, wasn't it? I blinked open my eyes, and ow the light hurt but I could still make out the vague outlines of five? or six? blurry outlines. Avengers, likely. 

Well, time to make a good impression. Be cooperative, answer all questions, don't make yourself sound loony, and-

"NUMBER FIVE IS ALLIIIIVEEEEEE!"

Shit, I need a brain-to-mouth filter.

"Well, the kid's awake."

"The unknown entity, Stark, it appeared out of a damned portal!"

"It is a bit harsh, we know she's female and Wanda said her thoughts sounded like a kid, besides she looks like a kid. Human, likely."

"Then tell me how a goddamned human that we have no record of just up and appeared out of a portal that functions remarkably like the Tesseract, proceeded to tell ominous predictions, and disagreed to being brought in?! It seemed to know us with a familiarity, Rogers, and until I find out why I want all our resources on it!"

"She, Fury, she."

"Don't backtalk me, Stark! What the hell is a number five, anyway?"

I blinked, the light making less of an impact as I became more aware of my surroundings. Tony was there, along with Steve, Natasha, Clint, and... Fury?

Wasn't he dead or something?

Wait, no, he wasn't. Or was he a Skrell or something? Skrull? Skaa? The shapeshifters.

"...hi?"

All attention snapped to me- my vision was still blurry as hell so I was pretty sure that they were looking at me. I saw Tony looking at some kind of monitor after looking at me. "Well, she's awake. Nat, Director Grumpy-Pants assigned you to interrogate the kid, so you've got the stage-"

"-interrogate? No need, I'll answer all your questions! Just ask, Miss Black Widow Natasha Ma'am."

Sometimes it was necessary to channel inner 'Peter -Excited To Meet Avengers- Parker'. Ahh, fanfictions. 200k words, Identity Porn, Peter Parker is a Ray of Sunshine, Gen- well, you get my point. She didn't look any different, and so I adjusted in the uncomfortable chair I was in- honestly, it felt like metal.

"You said your name was Artemis?" I nodded- that was a slight slip, I'd almost said Artie but I didn't want them to call me that, it'd be too weird. "Artemis Jones?" I nodded again. "Well, Artemis, I'd like you to answer some questions. You said you'd be willing to answer all our questions? I nodded again.

"Okay, so Artemis, how did you arrive in Central Park?"

Billion dollar question. Well, just gotta go for it I guess...

"Went through a blue portal."

She nodded. "That matches up with reports and information gathered. Do you know why you arrived in Central Park?"

"I told you, I went through a blue portal."

 "Where were you prior to going through the blue portal?"

"My house."

"Where do you live?"

I blinked. Uh. "Not here, definitely." She looked at me. "What do you mean by 'here', Artemis?" Oh right, my bad. "Oh, my bad, I meant not in this universe."

Oh.

Shoot, I messed UP-