Archive of Our Own ^beta

It's nothing Angela hasn’t heard before: We’re taking it in a different direction.

She's convinced she should look into trademarking that phrase and start making money off it. So Angela is just over today, she’s over the rejection, she's over being in this industry. Sure she loves it when she gets a part that really speaks to her; honestly at this point she would just love to get any part. With everything going on and now Angela’s sour mood she decides she wants to go home, mope and sulk around until she can’t sulk anymore.

Angela walks into her apartment and is quite shocked to see her girlfriend home. She thought Amanda wasn’t supposed to be home from work for at least a couple more hours. Her plan was to sulk and mope until then and hopefully it would be out of her system by the time Amanda got home. Clearly that is no longer the case.

Amanda had decided to take a half day since she knew Angela really wanted this audition to work out. She was really interested and in tune with the character. So Amanda was trying to surprise and show more support for her. As she hears the front door open and close she bounds off the couch and is on the cusp of a load of questions until she sees Angela's face.

Amanda snaps her mouth shut and just envelopes Angela in a hug. Not letting go until Angela starts to pull away. She then starts to make a beeline for the living room dropping her keys and bag on the floor as she goes. This might have caused an argument for Amanda but seeing Angela in this state it is definitely not the time to gripe about things on the floor.

“You probably assumed I didn’t get it.” Angela states as she has decided pacing the living room floor is gonna help her current pent up rage.

“I wasn’t assuming anything. I just came home early to surprise you, but I am sorry I know you really wanted this role.” Amanda says trying to err on the side of caution and choose her words wisely.

“Well this one said they're going in a different direction. Can you get blacklisted before you even start because I kinda feel like that is the only reason I keep on getting rejected at every audition.”

Amanda decides to stay silent as it seems Angela needs to rant or her little body might just combust. And Amanda is if anything here to be her ear today and everyday.

“I mean come on I give my heart and soul in every audition and the answer keeps seeming to be: you're not the image we're looking for, we've decided to go in a different direction, oh and the best one, someone will be in touch and then no one ever gets in touch. You know I spend all this time reading over scripts and getting into these roles. What is so wrong with me?” Angela pauses to try to control the tears forming, “ but you know what, I don't care. This is just another chip in the block for fuck sake. Clearly no one sees me. So I'm just gonna fade in the fucking background.”

Amanda’s been there so she doesn't take what Angela said personally. She knows Angela didn’t mean it as a dig to her; she'll just have to remind her who does see her and who cares.

Amanda approaches the still pacing Angela, “ Honey, you need to stop pacing you're gonna wear the floor down to studs soon. Take a deep breath and look at me please.”

Angela, who has stopped pacing glances up at Amanda and immediately turns her head away trying to hide the few escaped tears that rolled down her cheeks.

Amanda sees this and gently grabs her chin and pulls it to look at her. Her other hand starts to wipe the stray tears as she says, "Listen to me sweetheart, I see you. If there's no one left on this planet that sees you then I must be dead in the ground because I will see, hear, and encourage you until the end of time”

Angela just stares in awe at this woman that means the world and more to her, “I believe you.”

“I will tell you everyday if that is what you need. I just want to be here for you. You’re not doing this alone.”

“I know you would but you don’t have to. Right now I just want a hot bath. All that tension and pacing seems to really have done a number on my legs.” Angela says as she seems to be on the upside of this battle. “And there's just one more thing I wanted to say.”

Amanda stops on her way to their bathroom to start the bath, “and what's that?”

“I love you.”

“And I love you, babe.”