Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

She’s Always Smiling

⚘↠Shattering Reality↞⚘

Part One

Contents

Chapter 1: Days Gone By

Chapter 2: It Takes Guts

Chapter 3: Judge, Jury, Executioner

Chapter 4: Don't Blink

Chapter 5: It's All Your Choice 

Chapter 6: Going for a Ride

Chapter 7: In Italy...

Chapter 8: One Second

Chapter 9: Flowing Fear

Chapter 10: little secrets

Chapter 11: i don't know what to do

Chapter 12: Blood Flows as Deep as Hatred

Chapter 13: Falling From Grace

Chapter 14: Chupacabra

Chapter 15: A Shot in the Dark

Chapter 16: Secrets

Chapter 17: Keep Quiet

Chapter 18: Dead Already

Chapter 19: Mourning the Day

Chapter 20: Triggerfinger

Chapter 21: Picking Flowers

Chapter 22: Executioner 

Chapter 23: Better Angels

Chapter 24: Purifying Fire

Chapter 25: 15 Roses

Chapter Text

“Sometimes I wonder if you even care about us at all.”

A young boy, no older than the age of eleven, spoke into the small corner of the playground to his friend. “She said that to dad before school.” He explained, following his friend's flowing dress carefully.

The young girl of the same age slowed her steps to a set of old swings. “Do you know what happened?” She asked easily, looking towards the boy before sitting on the swing’s seat gently.

The boy shrugged, his flannel picking up easily with the breeze as he pushed himself. “Not really, they just fight…” The girl nods, playing with her hands, as though she’s heard it before. “Mom’s usually really mad and Dad tries to calm her down but-” He takes another pause sighing into the air. “It doesn’t seem to work.”

The girl nods her head, knowingly. Grabbing the chains of the swing, looking towards her friend. “You know we… they both-” She started slowly stumbling over her words. “They love you, right?” She asked, her voice holding an emotion the young boy had heard before.

His shoulders shrug once again. “I guess.” He picks at his jeans with slight malice. “Sometimes I think it’s me-” He admits quietly. “Like maybe I’m the reason they fight.”

The girl’s shoulders go rigid. “You aren’t the reason, Carl.” She claims strongly but quietly.

The boy, Carl, kicks some sand on the ground. “I think they're gonna get a divorce.” His voice carries little emotion, as though he thought of it before.

“Do you really think they would?”

“I don’t know anymore.” He admits sadly. The weight of the confession seemingly drifted off his shoulders as he spoke.

The girl looks at Carl’s saddened face. “Well… no matter what happens-” She starts gaining Carl’s attention. “I’ll still be here.” She claims as though it was the easiest thing in the world. “You couldn’t get rid of me if you tried.” She joked, pushing at Carl to swing a bit.

Carl grinned, swinging with her. “And you can’t get rid of me.”

The pair laughed, looking onto the playground where their fellow schoolmates ran around, screaming and laughing. The two fell into a quiet space, gently swinging.

The warm air of King County, Georgia brought with it the scent of fresh-cut grass and bloomed flowers further calming the pair as they swung. The sun hid between clouds as though waiting to jump out and ruin the peace that had settled.

“Do you promise?” Carl asked quietly into the silence. The girl stopped swinging and Carl opened his mouth before the girl could speak. “Pinky promise me, Bee.” He almost begged his friend.

The girl, Bella, smiled, sticking her hand out to her friend- their pinkies wrapping around each other.

“Pinky promise.” She claimed with a smile. The pair smiled as a whistle blew loudly calling for the end of recess and their last class of the day.

But the happiness disappeared as the sun came to beat on the school. The red and blue lights, tight-lipped parents, the multiple officers standing with her caps at their chest and their hands titled down. It was the day the world tilted on its axis for Carl and Bella… Rick Grimes, Carl dad’s, had been shot. And after a long surgery that saved Rick’s life, the rest of the world titled with them.

A disease spread like the breeze; people dying, waking up, dying again… people fighting, killing, burning alive- nothing but death, pain, and agony existed. It wasn’t till most of the world died that the fear and frenzy stopped but now a new fear settled in and it’s all people could feel.

“Bee, come on,” Carl whines into the air. “We’re not supposed to be this far out.” He claims, jogging a bit to catch up with Bella.

“I wanna pick some flowers.” She shot back quickly.

Carl jogs to Bella's side. “Mom and Shane are gonna be mad.” He says to her but Bella merely rolls her eyes as Carl tries to get her to slow down, to turn around.

Bella looks towards Carl continuing her steps up a small hill where she spotted some colorful flowers. “If you help me we can get back faster and they won’t even know we were gone.” She states, gripping and ripping at flower stems, choosing the prettiest flowers to take. Her hands quickly fill up with a small bundle.

Carl sighs, sticking out a metal bucket Bella had shoved into his hands before they started their search. “How many do you want?” He asks as Bella drops the flowers into the bucket.

“Whichever are pretty.” She says with a joyful smile. “I wanna draw them.”

Together the pair moved across the flowers picking at them and gathered a colorful array.

Carl let Bella drop the rest of her collection into the bucket. “Are you not scared one of the dead people might find us out here?” He asks, confused by the air of carelessness around her.

“Is that what you fear?” She questions, smiling at Carl. “Don’t worry, I’ll protect you.” She jokes, causing Carl to shove at her shoulder in annoyance with a playful huff. Bella picked one last flower, dropping it into the bucket. “I’m not going to let anything happen to you, Carl.” She claims.

With a raised brow, Carl questions his friend. “What about Mom and Shane?”

Bella rolls her eyes. “Well… I’m a kid, I can only do so much.” She said, raising her hands. The friends sighed in unison.

They had been friends since they were born- growing up and learning everything about the world together. And when the world fell, they were together for that too. Bella and Carl had seen pain and death, things children should never see,... and they stayed together for that too.

Carl smiles looking at the large bucket. “You good?”

Bella nods her head reaching out for the bucket. “Yeah, come on.” Carl pulls the bucket away from her hands and runs down the hill leaving Bella behind. She hoots at Carl, calling him a cheater for running away without her.

The two laugh as they slow to a stop as they approach the center of camp.

The laughter was short as Bella’s father came up, pulling gloves off his hands.

“Where were you two?” He questions quickly spotting the bucket and the telltale signs of the pair having just run.

Bella took in a breath pointing at the bucket with a beaming smile. “Picking some flowers.”

Shane looks down at his daughter, his face stretched in seriousness with an eyebrow raised almost comically. “You left camp?!”

Bella's smile quickly drops. “No, Daddy.” She claims turning and pointing in the direction they went in. “We were just behind the bushes over there.” Carl quickly nods his head, agreeing with Bella.

Shane sighs loudly. “You both know not to leave our line of sight.” He states knowingly looking between the pair.

“I’m sorry, Daddy. I thought we were close enough.” Bella claims.

Rubbing a hand over his face, he sighs. The pair had always caused some type of trouble by running away and even with the state of the world they continued running away. Shane and Carl’s parents would always joke about it- ‘Carl and Bella are just like their fathers- always causing trouble’... now they didn’t find it funny.

Shane brought his towering form down into a squat, sweat dripping down his strong face and moistening the tips of his hair. “It's okay. Just-” He paused looking between the kids, the children that were too soft and vulnerable for the world now. “Just tell me or Lori next time, okay?”

“Yes, daddy.”

“Yes, Shane.”

Shane smiles, dropping a kiss on Bella’s head and ruffling Carl’s hair. Standing back onto his heels he waves the kids off, the pair skipping over to the firepit. Sitting as a cut log Lori, Carl’s mother, folds a basket of laundry- her thin arms covered in a sheen of sweat from the Altana sun the beats on the camp.

Lori was always a thin lady- but though her form was not imposing, she made up for it with a quick, sharp tongue.

Looking up at the pair, Lori raises her eyebrow. “What do you two have there?” She questions towards the bucket.

“Bee wanted flowers,” Carl explains, dropping dramatically next to his mother.

Lori’s light chuckle flows around the trio as Bella settles herself down near Carl but stays a distance from the mother-son pair.

“What are you gonna do with them?” Lori asks.

“I was gonna draw some then make flower crowns,” Bella explains as she separates and bundles the flowers together, settling them down against rocks. Drawing was a known hobby of Bella even though her drawings were not leveled with Picasso she still enjoyed the calming hobby.

Lori nods looking towards Carl who pulls out a comic book. “Did you both finish your chores?”

“Yes, Mrs.Grimes.”

“Yes, mom.”

Lori grabs the comic from Carl’s hands, who turns in a huff. “Carl, why don’t you do some homework?” Lori offers setting the comic down next to her leg. “Don’t give me that look, it's important to study.” Her mom voice comes out as she looks towards Carl.

Complaining, Carl looks towards his mother with beginning eyes. “Can I just read?” He asks his finger crossed behind his back causing Bella to smile.

Lori stands strong for a mere moment before she sighs under the gaze of the two kids. “Fine.” She relents but quickly stops Carl who bends down for the comic. “But not a comic book.”

With another sigh, Carl turns on his heel heading towards the camp's RV in search of a book. With Carl gone, Bella and Lori settle into silence going back to their separate activities. It only takes a few minutes before Carl comes out with a simple book from Dale’s little library within his RV. Dale being an older man with graying hair and a gentle face- sat atop his RV keeping watch for the camp.

Carl settles down next to Bella, leaning against the wood log and pulling his knees up to rest his book. Bella took a side glance at the book title before starting her light sketching. Carl began reading the book, ‘The Hobbit’ recommended by Dale himself out loud to Bella and his mom.

Minutes pass as Carl reads the book, stopping a few times with troubling words before continuing once again on the passages. Bella focuses on her sketchbook, pencil moving across the page and eraser shavings pushed to the ground.

With her sketch deemed good enough, Bella sets her book aside and moves to her knees. With the bundles of flowers at her side her fingers move carefully twisting and turning the stems into place to create a chain of flowers.

The partially made flower crown is held up to Carl’s head every minute or two, Bella adding flowers to size the crown. Carl sighs in annoyance as Bella continuously places the crown on his head.

“I’m trying to read.” Carl finally says when Bella once again puts the crown to his head- the constant action distracting him from the book.

“I’m trying to make us crowns,” Bella explains, simply twisting stems and grabbing more flowers.

Carl closes his book with a snap and looks at his friend. “Boys don’t wear crowns.” He claims.

Bella pauses looking towards Carl. “Yes, they do.”

“Not flower crowns.”

She shrugs her shoulders with not a care in the world, the crown once again at Carl’s head. “They do now.”

Carl pushes at Bella's hands trying to move her away when a small body comes bouncing towards the pair, stopping themselves right at Bella and Carl’s feet.

“Hi, Bella. Hi Carl.” The joyful voice says, shying at Carl’s name. Looking up Bella and Carl see another girl their age, Sophia, a thin girl with messy blonde hair and long uncoordinated limbs. “What are you doing?” She asks.

“Reading and making crowns,” Bella responds simply and dryly, the crown dropping to her lap- Carl gives his friend a look from the corner of his eye confused at the sudden change in attitude.

“Can I make a crown?” Sophia requests with a hopeful smile. The girl tried constantly to play with the pair since they were the only other kids in the camp besides a few younger children who kept to themselves.

Bella grabs her flowers pulling them closer to herself. “You’ll have to find your own flowers.” She responds, voice hard, watching Sophia’s smile drop slowly. Lori, forgotten to the side, clears her throat drawing Bella’s attention. With a sigh, she looks back to Sophia.“I only got enough for Carl and me.” She explains with a softer tone.

In an explosive movement, Carl hops up from his seat dropping the forgotten book at Bella’s side. “She can have my flowers.” He says, causing Bella’s face to drop in confusion and sadness as she watches Carl leave her behind and head towards her father. “Hey, Shane!” Carl calls out to Shane quickly catching up to the larger man.

Ever since the death of Carl’s father, he had drawn closer to his godfather Shane, Bella’s father. Bella herself did not necessarily mind that Carl was spending time with her dad… but she did mind when he would leave her alone with others.

Bella sighs and moves herself gently prompting Sophia to drop down next to her. The pair sat together weaving flowers, Sophia stopping Bella to question how to do the next flower with Bella explaining that it was the same process as the rest. With Bella’s annoyance growing with each flower, a chubby-face man that was nothing but a headache came stomping towards the girls- he quickly grabbed at Sophia’s arm dragging her away with an excuse that Bella didn’t catch and didn’t care too.

With the sun moving farther across the sky, the afternoon breeze dissipated fully, leaving nothing but the afternoon sun beating down.

Resting underneath an umbrella, Bella looked up from her sketchbook to see Carl bounding over to her. “Where’d Sophia go?” He asks looking around the small camp for the girl.

“Why do you care? You left us first.”

Carl stands up straight. “I wanted to see what Shane was doing.” He explains sitting down next to Bella and trying to peek into her sketchbook. “What are you drawing now?” He asks as Bella snaps the book closed quickly.

“Nothing.” She says putting the book away and looking towards her friend, her chest feeling a tightness at the expression on Carl’s face. “I was thinking of asking Daddy to take me out to check the traps, you wanna come?” The question is said softly, Bella’s eye tracing Carl’s face carefully.

“Yeah!” He exclaims with a bright smile. “When are you gonna go?”

Bella stood up to brush her dress off. “I was gonna ask once Daddy was done chopping wood.”

Carl turns towards his mom who stands a distance away moving small firewood into piles. “Can I go, Mom?”

Lori looks up from the side of her eyes and nods having heard the conversation. “If Shane’s okay with it.”

Carl stands up to join Bella as the radio centered between the firepit and the RV crackled to life. Everyone in the camp goes quiet and still, turning towards the radio.

“Hel-ello?” A man's voice crackles over the radio. “Can an-ody -ear my voice?”

A blonde-haired girl of twenty years old, Amy, is the closet and moves to answer the man. “Hey? Hello?”

“Can - hear my voi-?”

“Yes, I can hear you,” Amy responds quickly, encouraging the man to speak. “You're coming through. Over.”

However, the voice over the radio seems to have not heard the callback. “Anybody -o reads, -ease -pon-d.” He continues as the group of survivors gather around the radio. Lori comes behind Bella and Carl, her hand resting reassuringly on her son’s shoulder. “Broadcast- on the -ergency chan— pproaching Atlanta - Highway 85. Anybody reads, p-e respond.”

Amy speaks again, voice raised. “We're just outside the city.” The radio squeaks and crackles as it struggles to keep the connection. “Damnit. Hello? Hello?” The noise fizzles out and the radio goes quiet. Amy’s shoulders drop, and the camp sighs in unison. “He couldn't hear me. I couldn't warn him.”

Dale, now down from his post, moves closer with his rifle resting in his hand. “Try to raise him again.” His head turns towards Shane who comes up with an axe still in his hands. “Come on, son. You know best how to work this thing.” Dale spoke to Shane.

Slamming the axe into an abandoned stump, he spoke into the radio. “Hello, hello, is the person who calls still on the air?” He questions into the radio with a pause. “This is Officer Shane Walsh, broadcasting a person unknown, please respond.” With an unanswered crackle from the radio, Shane sighs, dropping the radio. “He's gone.”

“There are others,” Lori states. “It's not just us.”

Shane nods his head looking up to Lori. “Yeah, we knew there would be, right, that's why we let the CB on.”

“Lots of good it's been doing.” She claims, drawing everyone's attention to her. “I've been saying for a week... that we ought to put signs up on 85 to warn people away from the city.”

Amy nods in agreement. “Folks got no idea what they're getting into.”

“We don't have enough time for signs,” Shane explains once again to the group, standing up from the radio.

“I think we need to make time,” Lori demanded, crossing her arms, her hip jutting out, voice laced with attitude.

“Yeah, that, uh… That's a luxury we can't afford.” He says pulling his hat off his head and smacking it into his hands in controlled frustration. “We are surviving here. We are day to day.”

Before Lori can resort, Dale speaks up. “And who the hell would you propose to send?”

“I'll go. Give me a vehicle.”

“No.” Shane shoots back before Lori can finish her sentence. “Nobody goes anywhere alone, you know that.” He states looking at the group before settling back on Lori. “Everyone knows that.”

Lori huffs. “Yes, sir.” Turning on her heel she stomped back towards her tent leaving the group in a moment of silence before they turned back to their work.

Carl and Bella stood towards the back watching Lori leave. Carl starts to move after his mother but is quickly stopped by Shane.

“Hey, hey, come on, take a seat, buddy,” Shane says, pointing towards a lawn chair. Carl’s face told of wanting to resort but he knew better. “Princess, stay with Carl.” Says Shane as he moves after Lori leaving the two children behind.

The conversion between the two widowed parents was private, kept from their children and the group.

Once Shane emerged from the tent and sent Carl to see his mom, he walked over to his daughter kneeling down next to her as she drew, curled up into the lawn chair.
Bella sat for a moment, waiting for her dad to say something but nothing came. Stopping her pencil strokes she looked to her father. “Everything okay, daddy?” She asks carefully.

Shane turns to his daughter, hand finding her hair, and petting it gently in affirmation. “Everything is fine, Princess. You don’t need to worry.” He speaks, pulling back gently to truly look at his daughter. “Are you okay, sweetheart? I know a lot has happened and we haven’t really had time to talk about it.”

“I’m fine, daddy.” She responds, her face curling in a smile. “Carl’s fine.” She adds on.

Shane gave a knowing smile grabbing at Bella’s cheek before turning his face with gentle seriousness. “I’m asking about you right now.”

Bella nods. “I’m fine. Maybe I'm a bit tired.” She explains, shrugging her shoulders. “The cots are uncomfortable- and I need to do my hair.”

Shane nods. “I know. I know.” He agrees, pulling gently at one of the many knots in Bella’s hair- the curls growing out of control since everything fell. “Hopefully soon we’ll get some real beds.” He adds. “And figure out something with this hair.” Bella hisses as her dad pulls at a knot, her hand smacking loudly on his chest but not causing any harm.

“I was gonna ask Mrs. Jacqui about it.” Shane looks down at Bella. “She said she could show me some ways to deal with it.”

Shane smiles, flatting Bella’s hair. “Sounds like a perfect idea, Princess.”

Bella smiles under the small praise and pokes at Shane’s face when she realizes he was looking at her hair once again. “Can we go with you to check the traps?”

Shane pulls back and rests on his foot. “We? As in you and Carl?” Bella nods her answer, one Shane already knew. “Of course, sweetheart.” He says, grabbing Bella by the hand and walking to find Carl.

The sun set and the temperature dropped, the camp coming together to rest. Though rest could never truly be found; the fire could only burn so high, they only had little to eat and drink, no comfortable beds and homes to sleep… and all that meant nothing when the nightmares of being ripped alive by the dead people rang in their minds every moment they slept- and every moment they lived.

Chapter Text

With a new morning, the camp began their daily chores once more. Bella and Lori sit around the fire pit, picking, skinning, and cutting- Lori cutting- some wild veggies that one of the other survivors had found, preparing for lunch. There wasn’t much food nowadays… and there most certainly weren’t many choices, so anything they could find was used with not a piece thrown away.

Bella skins one last potato, dropping into a water bath and putting the skinner down. “All done, Mrs. Grimes.” She claims as she carries the semi-large container of water and potatoes over to the grown women.

“Thank you, sweetie. We’re almost done.”

Bella gives Lori a small smile and plops down next to Carl who scribbles out some math problems. Lori had to practically force Carl to sit down and do some studying, ‘Studying is important’, she would always claim.

“If only we had bread…” Bella almost whines.

Carl laughs before responding quickly. “I miss bread.”

“We all do.” Lori agrees, continuing her cooking. The bustling of the camp fills the air as the minutes tick by.

There was a light worry settled over the camp. A group of survivors from camp had volunteered to journey off into Altana city- a place infested with the walking dead- to retrieve necessary supplies the group needed; medicine, food, clothes, and ammo. But they had not returned.

The group was meant to arrive in the morning, a two-day trip into the city, but by now it was two and a half days with no word from any of them… not even a crackle over the radio.

The girl, Amy, walks over with a red plastic bucket in her hands, passing it over to Lori who dumps it onto a metal tray and looks through them. “How do we tell if they're poison?” Amy questions looking down at the mushrooms she had found. There weren’t many and if they were poisonous, it would be nothing.

Lori picks up her shoulders looking up with a squint to Amy. “Uh, there's only one sure way I know of.”

“Ask Shane when he gets back?”

Lori laughs gently while standing with the bucket. “Yeah, you've got it. Thank you.” She says releasing Amy from the conversation.

Amy moves swiftly over to the RV, staying close to the radio- her sister was a part of the scavenging group and her worry was greater than anyone’s.

Looking to the top of the RV where Dale sits Lori speaks loudly to him. “Dale, I'm heading out.” She states before turning towards the kids. “Sweetheart, Bella, I want you to stay where Dale can see you, okay?”

The kids quickly nod their heads looking at Lori who goes to turn.

“You too.” Shouts Dale from the roof. “Don't wander too far. Stay within shouting distance. And if you see anything, holler.” He commands looking down at Lori. “I'll come running.” Lori laughs- though Dale was a kind man, he was also an older man and though he could handle a gun, he wouldn’t be able to jump from the RV and run into the woods fast enough to save anyone.

“Yes, mom.” She responds jokingly before making her way into the forest.

Bella and Carl merely remain in their place doing their separate activities while sitting hip to hip. The camp continued its routine; chores, boiling water, chopping wood… it felt almost surreal to everyone- strangers, people that would’ve never spoken to each other now working to survive with each other, meant to stand side by side to protect each other.

Shane and Lori had taken Bella and Carl to the side when their hope of shelter in Atlanta had been destroyed, the city set aflame. They told them that things would never be the same, that it was important to watch over each other, to stay close to them- if they didn’t… it could mean death.

Bella and Carl had stopped their activities to eat a small snack and drink water. While finishing their food, Lori comes walking back into camp with Shane by her side.

The two walk seamlessly, as though they had met each other walking back to camp. Approaching their children, Carl greets them happily but Bella stares at the pair, the expression on her face a mix of confusion, interest, and thoughtfulness. But her expression is quickly wiped away as Shane commands her to go get her hairbrush in hopes of taming the mess atop her head.

Sitting around the lightly lit fire, Shane pulls at Bella’s curls. “Ow! Daddy!” Bella cries, pulling her head away.

Shane sighs trying to pull gently at a knot. “I’m sorry, Princess.” He says honestly, pulling pieces of hair apart with his fingers. “This is the last knot.”

“You said that last time!” Bella shoots back causing Carl to laugh. Bella grabs a comic, throwing it at Carl. “Shut up.” She tells him, his laughter bubbling up even more.

“Language,” Shane says simply, picking the last knot out swiftly with Bella distracted with Carl. “How many braids do you want?” He questions Bella.

With an answer of two, Shane moves quickly, parting his daughter's hair and beginning two French braids on her head. His hands, beaten and calloused with years of hard work and the handling of guns, move gracefully and gently atop his daughter’s head. The day Shane learned of his daughter's birth was an emotional one.

It was a short-term relationship of Shane’s, ending quickly when Bella’s mom, Samantha Turner, needed to return to New York City for her job. It was a mere nine months later that Shane was contacted by Samantha’s sister claiming she had Shane’s daughter and her sister was dead.

It was a difficult time for Shane, faced with a new reality of not only having a child… but having a daughter. Lori and Rick had greatly helped Shane with his girl in the early months but were forced to step back when Carl was born.

And though Shane was scared of his daughter, of the future, he decidedly became the best dad he could. He bought more books than he’d ever read, toys, clothes, and things to help his daughter grow. He went to ‘First Time Parent Classes’ and did everything he could… becoming the ultimate girl-dad, always ready to be with his daughter.

With the sun at its top point in the sky Shane, Bella, and Carl sat together working with rope tying knots into the strands.

Sitting atop Shane’s knee Bella faces Carl as the pair works at the knot Shane instructed them to. Instruction by instruction the kids twist and loop their rope.

“Attaboy,” Shane says as Carl leads his end through his loop. With the step complete, Bella and Carl wait for Shane’s next step. “Y’all ready?” Together they nod gripping at the indicated end. “And three, two, one… pull it.”

Together the pair pull at their own rope with bright smiles. Carl’s grin drops to disappointment as the knot completely unravels on his lap. “Ah! Aw.”

“Haha!” Bella cackles as she holds up her intact knot, waving her success into Carl’s face.

Rolling his eyes, Carl pushes at Bella trying to keep his face twisted in annoyance but quickly failing, the corners of his mouth twisting into a smile. “Shut up.” He demands with little strength behind his words.

Shane shakes his head with a light smile on his face looking between the friends. “Don’t listen to her, she’s been doing this since she was born.” He says to Carl reassuringly, causing Bella to stick out her tongue to Carl. Together the three laugh, Lori sitting close by smiling at the relationship between the three.

With the laughter died down, Shane goes back to teaching Carl to knot. “Start it over. Make your ‘p’ the other way… around your finger.”

Carl quickly follows Shane’s instructions paying close attention in hopes of succeeding this time. Bella rests against her dad's chest as she pulls at the knot and begins a new one, different from Carl's.

The calm that settled over the camp is swiftly interpreted by the squawking of the radio. “Hell- ase cam-!” Comes over the radio, people jumping up to move closer. “Can -body out -ere hear me? Base camp, this- dog.” Shane picks Bella up, dropping her to her feet. “Anybody -ear me?”

Quickly Dale grabs at the radio responding to the person on the radio. “Hello? Hello?” He speaks, the radio constantly squeaking and cracking. “Reception's bad on this end. Repeat. Repeat.”

“-hane, is -at you?”

Lori approaches from her spot looking towards Dale. “Is that them?”

“We- in -ome deep shit. We're trap- in… department store.”

A tense fog drops over the camp at the words from the radio. “He said they're trapped?” Shane repeats in concern, women cover their mouths as men drop their heads.

“- geeks all over… place- undreds of 'em- surrounded.”

Dale questions quickly. “T-Dog, repeat that last. Repeat.” With a final crackle and pop the radio goes silent leeching onto the survivors.

Lori is the first to break the silence. “He said the department store.”

“I heard it too,” Dale confirms, dropping the radio back to the stump it rests on.

With everything they hear, the survivors look towards Shane- their ‘chosen’ leader. He shakes his head swiftly, “No way.” He says strongly, he knew there would be pushback. “We do not go after them. We do not risk the rest of the group. Y'all know that.”

Amy looks towards Shane, unshed tears glimmering in her eyes. “So we're just gonna leave her there?” She questions, her voice gently breaking over her words.

Shane sighs, turning towards Amy, “Look, Amy, I know that this is not easy…” He tries gently.
“She volunteered to go-” Amy states her voice is lined with tears and anger, “... to help the rest of us.”

Shane nods his head. “I know, and she knew the risks, right?” He speaks gently, taking a step towards her, “See, if she's trapped, she's gone.” The words he speaks pains everyone- they know it’s true… and the truth hurts. “So we just have to deal with that… there's nothing we can do.” He finishes in a whisper.

Amy’s sadness turns quickly into disgusting anger. “She's my sister, you son of a bitch.” She spits before running away leaving everyone standing in their spots.

Lori gives Shane a strained look before jogging after Amy, thunder rumbling loudly in the distance. Sane sighs looking around the camp, sending everyone back to what they were previously doing. With a final turn, Shane looks at Bella and Carl, “Come on.” He says leading the two away. “It's all right.”

With the afternoon arriving, Carl was forced to sit on a log as his mother sawed at his hair. The scissors Lori was using did nothing but ruin Carl’s hair and Bella hated that. She turned to a book in hopes of ignoring the squirming of Carl.

With a gentle hand on her shoulder, Bella looks up to Shane. “You could do with a cut too, Princess.” He claims, picking away some leaf pieces that had found their way into Bella’s hair.

“I’m okay,” Bella responds shortly.

Lori smiles towards Bella, sawing at yet another piece of Carl’s hair. “It would be no problem, sweetie.” She claims, running the comb through Carl’s head. “Unless you act like Carl.”

“I’m sitting still.” Carl huffs in annoyance. He never enjoyed haircuts because his parents were insistent on giving him haircuts he thought were ugly. Bella would try to reassure him but ultimately agreed that they weren’t Carl’s style.

“Baby, you are fidgeting.” Lori grabs Carl's shoulders trying to get him to sit still. “The more you fidget, the longer it takes. So don't, okay?”

“I'm trying.” Whines out Carl as he pulls his head away.

Lori huffs a short laugh. “Well, try harder.”

Shane smiles, leaning his elbows on his knees as he cleans the exterior of his gun. “If you think this is bad, wait till you start shaving. That stings.” Shane claims pausing to take a good look at Carl. “That day comes, you'll be wishing for one of your mama's haircuts.”

“I'll believe that when I see it,” Carl responds, causing everyone to laugh.

Chuckling Shane came up with an idea. “I'll tell you what… you just get through this with some manly dignity and tomorrow I'll teach you something special.” Catching Carl’s attention, the boy leans forward before getting pulled back again by Lori. “I will teach you to catch frogs.”

“I've caught a frog before.”

A smile draws itself onto Shane's face. “I said frogs… plural. And it is an art, my friend. It is not to be taken lightly. There are ways and means. Few people know about it. I'm willing to share my secrets.”

Confused about the need for multiple frogs, Carl questions Shane who swiftly responds with the promise of cajun-style frog legs. Noises of disgust sound from Lori and Carl, denying the promise of frog legs.

Shane repeats his enthusiasm to Carl waiting for an answer. “What about Bella?” Carl askes.

Bella looks up at Carl. “I’m not the frog-catching type.”

Carl smiles, jumping up as Lori tells him his haircut is finished. “Scared you're gonna lose, Bee?” He pokes at Bella.

Bella gives Carl a sharp look, “Don’t start something you can’t win.” She says, her face was full of seriousness as her voice was laced in a joking tone.

Carl goes to respond but the blaring of an alarm tenses everyone’s spines. Shane jumps up quickly with his gun firmly held in his hands as he jogs to the RV. “Hey, Dale, can you see what that is?” Shane shouts at Dale who looks through his binoculars searching for the source of the sound in the rocky hills of the quarry where their camp rests. “Talk to me, Dale!” Shane shouts.

“I can't tell yet.”

Jogging up, Amy’s face is twisted in hope. “Is it them? Are they back?”

Dale pulls back slightly. “I'll be damned.”

“What is it?”

Dale’s mouth releases a cut-off laugh. “A stolen car is my guess.” He responds watching the speeding red sports car drift around turns and up to the camp, the driver moving with knowledge of the path.

Pulling up to the camp, the red car pulls to a stop. The alarm of the car blares loudly, even louder in the echoing quarry. Shane moves to approach the car as a Korean-American man gets out with the biggest grin plastered on his face.

Bella takes a step forward toward her dad in concern. “Daddy?!”

With a motion of his hand, Shane tells Bella to stay back- Carl grabs his friend's arm to pull her back.

Dale, now off the RV, moves to the car, “Holy crap. Turn that damn thing off!” He shouts over the alarm.

The man, Glenn, throws his arms up, a smile still plastered on his face- a telltale sign of his still existent youth only being in his early 20s. “I don't know how!”

Shane sighs, pointing towards the front of the car. “Pop the hood, please!” He shouts as Amy runs up to Glenn smothering him with questions about her sister. “Pop the damn hood, please!” Shane shoots angrily.

The noise of the car is dangerous- it would draw the dead walkers to them, it would draw survivors to them.

“Okay- yeah yeah. Yeah yeah!” Glenn shouts, pulling the lever to pop the hood. Shane moves quickly to pull a piece of the car, forcing it into silence.

Amy, still pushing questions at Glenn faster than he could ever respond, continues her assault on his ears. “Is she okay? Is she all right?”

“She's okay! She's okay!” Glenn shouts back at her since her volume did not dampen with the removal of the alarm. Amy questions where her sister is again and Glenn responds in kind, his smile gone from his face. “Everybody is fine!” Glenn shouts to the camp, signing into a calmer tone before his face pulls into a wince. “Well, Merle… not so much.”

Shane sighs looking at Glenn with his face pulled into fury. “Are you crazy, driving this wailing bastard up here? Are you trying to draw every Walker for miles?” He demands in question.

“I think we're okay,” Dale responds gently.

“You call being stupid okay?”

Dale shrugs his shoulders at Shane's question. “Well, the alarm was echoing all over these hills. Hard to pinpoint the source.” Shane swiftly turns his scowl to Dale. “I'm not arguing. I'm just saying.” Dale says, turning to Glenn. “It wouldn't hurt you to think things through a little more carefully next time, would it?”

“Sorry,” Glenn says truthfully, the seriousness of the alarm finally understood. “Got a cool car.” He says with a slight smile looking at the car.

The camp calms slightly as the truck containing the rest of the survivors pulls up. But with the arrival of the truck came pain for Carl. He wished every day and night that his father would return to him- that Rick wasn’t truly gone.

Bella never felt the pain of losing a parent- only having Shane her entire life- but watching Carl jump up from nightmares in a cold sweat or him stumbling his sentences because he wanted to call for his dad… it pained her in a way she couldn’t explain, something deep in her chest twisting at the thought. And Carl wouldn’t speak to her about it. She would try to be there but he would brush her off.

But now, Carl let Bella grab his hand in comfort standing at the back of the camp as people reunited with their families, fathers with their children.

It wasn’t until Bella picked her head up at her father’s words. “A new guy?”

Bella’s eyes went wide as the figure of a thin Rick Grimes rose his head towards the group. The world seemed to go silent as Rick sees Bella standing with his family- the people he was searching for finally in front of him.

It felt like a dream, floaty as the silence grew. Rick Grimes was dead- Lori and Shane told them that… he was supposed to be dead… how is he standing here?

Bella feels her eyes sting and a single tear drop down her cheek. “Mr. Grimes?” She questions causing both Carl and Lori’s heads to snap in the direction Bella stares.

The silence becomes too loud but is quickly destroyed as Carl screams in happiness, sprinting to his dad. “Dad! Dad!” He cries out.

Rick’s breath hitches as he moves towards his son, dropping to hug Carl with everything he had, tears starting to drop from both father and son.

The sounds of tears and happiness fill the camp as Lori goes to hug her husband and son- a reunion that no one would ever believe possible.

With gentle steps Bella approached the group, Rick looking at the girl and pulling her into the hug- Bella gripped tightly at Carl and Rick. The group cries and cries- happiness blooming over the entire camp as everyone is together once again.

And with the camp reunited and the sun setting, everyone moved off to their own tents- curling in for sleep. The disbelief and twisting of emotion exhausted everyone to their bare bones.

Atop the RV with the stars lighting the sky Bella curled into Shane. She could feel her father’s tension in his chest as the thunder continued to rumble above their heads. “You're upset.” She states simply.

“Upset?” Shane repeats looking down at Bella, “What do you mean, Princess?” He says gently but obviously hiding his true feelings.

“Nothing, Daddy. Nevermind.” Bella dismisses his question swiftly, curling into Shane tighter and wrapping her blanket closer. “I’m tired.”

Shane nods, “Go sleep in the tent, Princess.” He says but quiets down as Bella drops her head to Shane's thigh to sleep. Placing a gentle hand atop her head, Shane plays with a few loose strands. “Goodnight, my sweet girl.” He says quietly.

“Night, Daddy.”

Chapter Text

A calm has draped itself over the camp- but Carl Grimes vibrates with joy. The light of it is brighter than the new morning sun and as contagious as a cold.

With the excitement, Carl drags Bella away from her morning greetings to play tag with the other children that had gathered in the center of camp- choosing Sophia as the one that was ‘it’ causing the others to scatter into the camp.

Sophia darts off with her long legs after a boy younger than herself, hoping he would be slow enough to catch.

Together, Bella and Carl creep off behind a section of bushes watching Sophia chase after the other kids. Carl switches foot to foot preparing himself to dart off and next to him, Bella stood still watching Carl- not Sophia or whoever was now ‘it’ given the shouts of disappointment… but watching Carl.

Feeling the piercing gaze of his friend Carl turned towards Bella, stilling slightly at her gaze. “Are you happy?” Bella says simply watching him before he could open his mouth to question her.

The question takes Carl off guard, his face full of confusion, “Of course I’m happy.” He says simply, as though it was the easiest thing in the world. His dad was back. He came back from the dead- he woke up in a new world and started searching for them- he would’ve searched for the rest of his life. Why wouldn’t he be happy?

Bella gives Carl a soft smile, a real content smile. “Good.” She says softly, turning her gaze away to the shouting kids.

And with Bella now interested in the game, Carl continues to stare at Bella in confusion. It was not the first time Bella said something… random or out of nowhere. It was so normal in fact that everyone knew to mostly ignore what she says- Shane, Rick, and Lori had agreed that Bella didn’t have much of a filter- similar to most kids so it was best to respond lightly and move on.

But Carl was not one to ignore his friend… and he most certainly wouldn’t ignore such a question. “Why wouldn’t I be happy?” He questions, watching Bella look down in thought before turning to him.

With a shrug, she responds simply, “Daddy and Mrs. Grimes said he was dead. But he wasn’t.”

“They thought he was,” Carl states, almost as though he was defending the people that told him his father was dead. But Carl’s innocence ignored the fact. “It doesn’t matter… he’s back now.”

Though Carl’s innocence was ignoring reality- Bella’s was fighting against it. “I like that you're happy.” She says to him right as the girl that was now ‘it’ came darting around the bushes after Carl and Bella.

Together the pair sprints away, Bella and Carl push at each other hoping the other would get caught. The game continues even as the adults complete their new routine of chores- small smiles breaking across the grown-ups’ faces at the shouts of joy.

With the kids playing, Rick drags himself out of his slumber and into the new morning. His shoulders are softer as he looks about the camp as though he truly realized that he was with his family… and it isn’t a coma dream he thought he was stuck in- it was real, all of it.

Walking into the center of camp, Rick simply watches and greets the people he comes across- letting his reality wash over him. Speaking to his wife, Rick absorbs everything he sees- and listens to the joy of the children but the conversation turns sour as Rick talks about leaving.

When leaving the city, the group left behind a member- Merle Dixion, a red-neck racist man who was nothing but nasty and rude, handcuffed to a pipe on a roof. Merle was forced into the cuffs by Rick after he beat T-Dog and raised a gun on him. And the key that would release him was dropped down a drainpipe, lost to T-Dog who was forced to turn away to escape.

Now, Rick was a law-abiding man, not only because he was a sheriff but a well-raised man that held onto his morals of kindness, and that did not change even with the new world that faced him.

He wanted to go back for Merle- a man who wouldn’t give water to someone burning alive because he could not live with leaving him. And Lori couldn’t bear the thought of watching Rick- her high school sweetheart, her husband, the father of her child, her first love- walk away into the pits of hell to save a man who doesn’t deserve the energy it takes to think of him.

With the sour conversation, Shane pulls into the center of camp, his vehicle filled with fresh water. He reminds everyone to boil the water first before consumption and gets out to walk towards Rick- he could read his best friend’s… his brother’s mind.

Shane was only two steps closer to Rick when the shouts of joy turned to screams of terror.

The worst thing about happiness is that it can disappear in a moment.

The shrieks and cries of fear drop the camp into a cold fear. “Mom!” Comes Carl’s fearful shouts, breaking the parents of their shock. The combined shouts of children and Jacqui are loud in everyone’s ears

Joining Rick in the run, Shane throws him a sharpened stick to defend himself. The quick run feels like an eternity as the screams continue. The hard beating of everyone’s fear shakes them deeply.

Hopping over a line of tin cans Lori grabs at Carl swiftly dragging him into a tight hug and looking him over for injuries. Jacqui drops to her knees and points in the direction the origin of fear resided, tight breaks barely escaping her chest.

Even with all the questions shot at Carl, he responds to none. Turning from his mother’s grasp, he shoots his gaze around him, searching. “Bella!?” Carl shouts, the image of his friend nowhere to be seen. “Bee!?” He shouts again drawing away to go back the way he came- but Lori held fast to her son as Rick and Shane continued their pursuit.

With his gun raised, Shane came into the opening first where his daughter stood still, staring at the rotting corpse distractingly eating its prey of a fallen deer. But the walker had not grabbed the deer all on its own, arrows stuck out of the deer’s back legs.

Bella's face remained neutral staring at the walker even as Shane grabbed her shoulder pushing her behind his back. “Bella, stay behind me!” He bites out, gun aimed towards the walker’s head as Rick and the other men of the camp gather around the back of the walker. Andrea and Amy approach the back of the group reaching out for Bella who pulls herself away and closer to Shane, unwelcome to the touch of almost everyone.

It isn’t until the gagging of Andrea and Amy that the walker comes up for air and turns towards the fresh meat. The men share a quick look as the walker tries to stand.

A hit by Glenn carrying a shovel. A swipe by Morales with a sharp stick. And a final grunting swing of an ax by Dale- removing its head clean from its shoulders.

The walker’s dead head rolls to a stop on its side, the body falling limp. Thick blood drips slowly from the stump the head once rested.

The group released a collected sigh at the sight of the unmoving corpse. And not even a breath later Shane turns on his daughter, grabbing at her arms, “What the hell were you thinking?!” He shouts at Bella causing her to flinch away from his voice. “You could’ve died, Bella. Don’t you understand?!” He says, fear dripping in his tone. The thought of losing his daughter was something that he could not bear and she just stared at death unmoving.

Tears weld in Bella’s eyes when she finally looks up to her dad. “I’m sorry, daddy. I was- I…” Her face contorts into fear as reality finally hits her, her voice crackling with tears.

Shane instantly drops his angry face as he watches the tears drip down Bella’s cheeks. “It’s okay, sweet girl.” He whispers softly comforting Bella as she hugs herself tight into her father’s stomach.

“It's the first one we've had up here,” Dale states, pulling the attention away from the father and daughter. “They never come this far up the mountain.”

“Well, they're running out of food in the city, that's what.” A man, Jim, responds. The overrun city was out of food and the walkers left in search… everything needed to eat.

A crack of a branch sounds behind a large rock, and the group jumps into defense as the cause of the sound draws closer to the opening.

Daryl Dixion, another redneck man with a dirty muscle tee, sweat dripping down his exposed arms, and a crossbow stuck in his arms, drags himself out behind the rock- the men sighing in annoyance when they realize who it was.

Approaching the group, Daryl looks up and quickly spots the fallen deer and walker. “Son of a bitch. That's my deer!” He shouts walking into the clearing, uncaring of everyone staring at him. “Look at it.” He spits at the walker before raising his foot to beat at the fallen walker’s body. “All gnawed on by this… filthy, disease-bearing, motherless poxy bastard! What a fucking bitch!” Each word he speaks is coupled with a hard quick to the corpse.

The men simply stare at the scene already knowing the temper Daryl carried. But with each swear that Daryl spoke, Shane pulled Bella’s head closer as though it would stop the language from reaching her ears and tainting her speech. “Language.” He says simply motioning towards Bella.

Daryl raises his head swiftly, still angry with the walker. Dale steps forward slightly drawing the tension towards him in hopes of calming the situation down. “Calm down, son. That's not helping.” Dale's voice carries out simply.

“What do you know about it, old man? Why don't you take that stupid hat and go back to ‘on golden pond’?” Daryl shoots back just as swiftly, almost as though he had prepared the response long before and was waiting for the opportunity to use it. “I've been tracking this deer for miles. Gonna drag it back to camp, cook us up some venison.” He says dropping down to put the bolts from the deer’s legs. Pointing with the bolts in his hand he directs his question towards Shane. “What do you think? Do you think we can cut around this chewed up part right here?”

“I would not risk that.”

Daryl spits once more at the deer and walker as he stands. “That's a damn shame. I got some squirrel… ‘bout a dozen or so.” He points to the string of dead squirrels on his shoulder, adjusting the bunch. “That'll have to do.”

Suddenly the axed-off walker head begins to move causing Bella to jump behind Shane. The walker works its jaw and starts to growl. “Come on, people,” Daryl says, raising his crossbow to the head. “What the hell?” He shoots the bolt directly between the walker’s eyes. “It's gotta be the brain.” He pulls the bolt and looks at the group as though they were children. “Don't y'all know nothing?”

It was the only thing that put the walkers down for certain. A shot to the head, a hit, a stab… anything that destroys the brain. The government, the army, and anyone that tried to fight the walkers attempted other ways of killing them; burning, shots to the chest, cutting limbs off… everything. But the walkers weren’t alive- they were corpses… mere shells of the people that they once were.

With the deer forgotten, Daryl made his way into camp shouting for his brother, Merle. Shane and Rick stayed close behind Daryl trying to slow the man down. “Daryl, just slow up a bit. I need to talk to you.” Shane says as the camp gathers around the arrival of Daryl and the group.

Bella had stuck close to Shane as they went back to camp and as soon as Carl laid eyes on her he darted over. Bella grabs at Carl’s hand letting him lead her towards the outer border of the circle forming around Daryl.

Daryl turns to Shane, eyebrow raised at him. “About what?” He questions dropping the string of squirrels onto a stump he planned to skin them at.

Coming to a stop, Shane relaxed himself into a calm stance, one he would use as a police officer, “About Merle. There was a… there was a problem in Atlanta.” He whips at his nose almost in deflection.

Daryl goes quiet, a timid and saddened look on his face as he questions Shane, “He dead?”

“We're not sure.”

The timidness leaves quickly as he shouts at Shane, “He either is or he ain't!” Anger coursing in voice- his relationship with his brother may not have been the best… but Merle was his brother, the only blood he had left in the world. And anytime they needed each other- they were there.

“No easy way to say this, so I'll just say it.” Rick drags the attention to himself, bringing himself closer to Daryl.

“Who are you?”

“Rick Grimes.”

Daryl huffs a laugh, “Rick Grimes,” He steps forward, “You got something you want to tell me?”

Rick nods his head. “Your brother was a danger to us all, so I handcuffed him on a roof, hooked him to a piece of metal.” He explains simply, the anger in Daryl slowly building as he hears each word Rick says. “He's still there.” Rick finishes waiting for Daryl to react.

“Hold on. Let me process this.” Daryl paces shortly in his place, “You're saying you handcuffed my brother to a roof and you left him there?!” He ends with a shout.

And with Rick’s nod, Daryl acts. Daryl runs swiftly at Rick grabbing at his shoulders and trying to pull him to the ground, but Rick throws him off simply. With another grunt, Daryl draws his knife flipping the grip in his hand.

“Hey! Watch the knife!” T-Dog calls out as Shane rounds on Daryl whose sites are focused solely on Rick.

Carl calls out in fear to his dad but Bella simply pushes him back as Shane moves quickly. Twisting Daryl’s arm to his back, Shane forces the knife to drop from his grasp and quickly puts Daryl into a headlock, choking him every time he fights to get out of the grasp.

“You'd best let me go!” Daryl shouts.

Shane shakes his head and tightens his hold, “Nah, I think it's better if I don't.”

Dropping to the ground Daryl weakly lets out his complaint. “Choke hold's illegal.”

“File a complaint.” He responds simply, “Come on, man. We'll keep this up all day.”

Rick kicks the knife farther away letting T-Dog grab it from the ground before bending down to Daryl who remained in Shane’s hold, “I'd like to have a calm discussion on this topic. Do you think we can manage that?” He says strongly, getting closer to Daryl’s face when he doesn't respond. “Do you think we can manage that?”

With Daryl’s nod of argument, Shane drops Daryl fully and takes a step back. Daryl stays on the ground for a moment before slowly rising with Rick’s face of approval. “What I did was not on a whim.” Rick starts, “Your brother does not work and play well with others.”

Daryl is still strung tight with anger but holds back waiting for Rick to better explain himself. Merle may have been a dick, something Daryl would agree with- but he was still human and they left him. But before Rick can continue, T-Dog steps forward. “It's not Rick's fault. I had the key. I dropped it.”

“You couldn't pick it up?”

T-Dog has been filled with guilt at dropping the key. Even with the beating, physical and verbal, that Merle had forced onto T-Dog he still felt bad about what happened that day… even if he had deserved what happened. “Well, I dropped it in a drain.” He explains.

Daryl moves shortly to T-Dog. “If it's supposed to make me feel better, it don't.” He spits out looking T-Dog up and down.

“Well, maybe this will… I chained the door to the roof… So the geeks couldn't get at him… With a padlock.” T-Dog states firmly. He gave Merle a chance, he’s still there baking away in the Altana sun.

“It's gotta count for something.” Says Rick looking at Daryl.

With his face screwing up in pain, Daryl shouts, “Hell with all y'all! Just tell me where he is so that I can go get him.” He says approaching Rick. He would go find his brother the moment he learned where he was.

“He'll show you.” Lori says, causing everyone to look between her and Rick in confusion. Lori’s face is filled with resentment. “Isn't that right?”

A pregnant pause fills the camp as Rick stares at the ground fighting with himself. He did not want to leave his family, it would be the hardest thing to do… But they’re safe right now and Merle isn’t- and Rick can’t live with the fact they left him there like an animal. “I'm going back.” He says finally.

Disbelief fills the camp and a riot comes from Shane who follows after Rick questioning him about what the hell Rick was thinking. Why he would leave- how he could leave Lori and Carl. “Look… I don't understand, okay, Rick? So could you just… Could you throw me a bone here, man? Could you just tell me why?” Shane begs Rick as he comes back into the center of camp, dressed and ready to go back into the city. “Why would you risk your life for a douche bag like Merle Dixon?” He spits out.

“Hey, choose your words more carefully.” Daryl says as he sharpens his knife.

“No, I did. Douche bag's what I meant.” He says easily. Shane releases a huff looking at Rick. “Merle Dixon…The guy wouldn't give you a glass of water if you were dying of thirst.”

“What he would or wouldn't do doesn't interest me. I can't let a man die of thirst… me. Thirst and exposure. We left him like an animal caught in a trap. That's no way for anything to die, let alone a human being.”

“So you and Daryl,” Lori starts staring at her husband. “That's your big plan?”

Rick gives a gentle sigh before turning behind him to look towards Glenn who leaned against his red sports car. “Oh, come on.” Glenn whines when he realizes that Rick is looking at him.

“You know the way. You've been there before… In and out, no problem. You said so yourself.” Rick states back to Glenn the words he told Rick when they had first met- when Glenn had saved Rick from a tank surrounded by hundreds of walkers. “It's not fair of me to ask… I know that, but I'd feel a lot better with you along. I know she would too.” He says honestly.

“That's just great.” Shane spits. “Now you're gonna risk three men, huh?”

“Four.” Sounds T-Dog’s voice causing Daryl to huff.

“My day just gets better and better, don't it?” Daryl says sheathing his knife and pulling his crossbow across his shoulders.

“You see anybody else here stepping up to save your brother's cracker ass?”

Daryl raises an eyebrow. “Why you?”

T-Dog shakes his head, “You wouldn't even begin to understand.” He says unwilling to explain himself to someone like Daryl, “You don't speak my language.”

Dale speaks up, “That's four.”

“It's not just four.” Shane corrects, starring Rick down, “You're putting every single one of us at risk. Just know that, Rick.” Rick had just awoken to the new world, Shane lived through the fall- Shane knew better than Rick but Rick’s mentality of the old world was still stuck in his head. “Come on, you saw that Walker. It was here. It was in camp.” Shane spits, hoping that Rick will understand. “They're moving out of the cities. They come back, we need every able body we've got. We need 'em here. We need 'em to protect camp.”

Rick nods understandably and Shane releases a sigh of relief. “It seems to me what you really need most here are more guns.” Rick says, seemingly following Shane’s leadership.

“Right, the guns.”

Shane stops the train of thought, “Wait. What guns?”

“Six guns, two high-powered rifles, over a dozen guns.” Rick lists, “I cleaned out the cage back at the station before I left. I dropped the bag in Atlanta when I got swarmed. It's just sitting there on the street, waiting to be picked up.”

“Anmo?”

“700 rounds, assorted.”

Shane was slowly coming to the idea of going back into the city. Guns are important in protecting the camp, protecting themselves from walkers or any dangers that may come for them.

“You went through hell to find us.” Lori says sadly, “You just got here and you're gonna turn around and leave?” Her voice crackles with tears.

Carl steps forward looking up to his dad. “Dad, I don't want you to go.”

Lori huffs in anger. “To hell with the guns. Shane is right.” Rick looks towards his wife as he holds Carl’s hand. “Merle Dixon? He's not worth one of your lives, even with guns thrown in.” She spits angrily before coming closer. “Tell me. Make me understand.” She begs.

Rick looks at Lori seriously and explains why he is so adamant on going back. The father and son that saved him would be following him- they’d walk into the city, the same dangerous situation Rick did. And the only way to warn them was the walkie that was lost in the gun bag.

The walkie that matches no other scanner or bandwidth in the world, dated all the way back to the 70’s.

Lori’s eyes let loose a few tears as she looks at Rick… she can’t stop him, and it hurts her heart in unexplainable ways.

With the tension in the camp, Rick prepares the small four-man group to enter the city once more, gathering everything they would need to get both Merle and the guns that were forgotten. Within the hour, the group is ready to leave.

Once they said goodbyes and promises of returning, the group gathers into the cube van to begin the ride into the city.

Bella watched as the van left, standing close to Shane, and with a slight turn of her head she saw that Carl was no longer by her side watching the group leave.

Moving carefully Bella makes her way towards the Grimes’ tent, peering in to see Carl lying with his back to the tent opening. The silence in the tent is noticeable but Bella knows that Carl is merely listening to the silence, not asleep to it. So she carefully climbs over Carl’s legs to lay on the other side of the cot, facing Carl and grabbing his hand.

The pair merely stares at each other as the camp noises resume their routine, metal knocking and voices talking. It's only a few minutes into their silence that Lori enters the tent in the same manner as Bella, moving to sit next to Carl’s legs.

“Hey. You know, I bet they'll be just fine.” She says softly, whipping at the stray tears fallen on her cheeks.

Carl turns slightly towards his mom, “I'm not worried.” He states confidently, “Are you?”

Lori releases a soft motherly laugh, “Yeah, a little.” She admits looking into her son’s eyes.

Carl smiles gently, “Don't be.” Lori questions her son, why shouldn’t she be worried? “Think about it, mom. Everything that's happened to him so far… Nothing's killed him yet.” Carl’s proclamation causes Lori to laugh and drops a kiss onto his forehead.

A few hours go by when the group of Rick, Daryl, Glenn, and T-Dog finally make it into the city and Glenn starts them on their task of retrieving Merle and the guns on foot. The group tense with what they may find in the city.

Down by the water of the mining quarry, Bella sits on a large smooth rock gently sketching the trees that poked from the top of the quarry’s wall. Shane looked up towards his daughter who sat quietly, “Sure you don’t wanna join us, Princess?” He questions.

“I’m fine here.”

Carl smiles up at Bella close to the water’s edge, whereas Shane stands knee-deep in the still blue water, bucket in hand, “I’m gonna catch you a big ol’ frog for you to draw.” Carl states proudly, fishing net gripped in his hands.

Bella laughs gently, the three had been by the water for the past half hour with no signs of frogs and not a single one caught, “Don’t make promises you can’t keep.” She responds simply, causing Carl to stick his tongue out mockingly to Bella and flicks the wet fishing net towards her in hopes of getting her wet.

Bella moves to revolt but Shane tells them both to calm down unless they want to scare the frogs away.

With the sun beating down the camp, the three sit by the quarry for another ten minutes before Carl starts to get bored, “I'm not getting anything.” He says lifting the empty net.

Shane sighs in disappointment before standing straighter. “Yeah. Being all wily, staying submerged. Little suckers, they know something's up. That's what's going on.” Shane cracks his neck carefully looking at Carl in excitement causing Carl to listen closer. “Just going to have to do this the old-fashioned way. All right, little man, look. You are the… you are the key in all this, okay? All I'm gonna do is I'm gonna go after one of them, all right, scare the rest of them off. They're all gonna scatter.” He explains, Carl nodding his head in understanding. “I'm gonna drive 'em your way, okay?”

“All right.”

Bella stops her sketching and watches the pair, “What you need to do is you need to round up every bad boy you see, all right?” Shane tells Carl, sparing Bella a smile. “Are you with me?” Carl nods enthusiastically towards Shane, “Hells yeah! Give me your mean face! Grr-” He commands Carl, the pair growling their ‘mean’ faces to each other, “Yes sir. Are you ready?”

“Yeah!”

“Here we go.” Shane says before he starts splashing the water attempting to scare as frogs towards Carl’s net that now rested in the water. Carl laughed as Shane splashed the water with no coordination, soaking himself and getting Carl wet too. The water soothing against the sun that was beating even harder today. “What have you got, bad boy?! What do you got?! What do you got?!” Shane claims, waiting for Carl to raise the net.

The suspense is quickly muted when the net rises and nothing but dirt and water run through the net. “Dirt.” Carl sighs.

Shane huffs, “Oh boy. All right, we've got to start over.” Shane says it as though it was the easiest thing in the world. “Come on, let's find this bucket.”

Bella has a sharp grin on her face, “I’m still waiting on my frog.” She sings to Carl who turns quickly telling Bella to be quiet.

Laughter bubbles up from Bella's chest at Carl’s face and she doubles over her lap in laughter- Carl mockingly laughing with Bella. It’s with Lori’s arrival that the laughter moves to silence.

Lori walks up, placing her hand atop Carl’s hair, “Hey, Carl, what did I tell you about not leaving Dale's sight?”

Carl's face twists in confusion, “But Shane said we could catch frogs, remember?”

Lori shakes her head, “It doesn't matter what Shane says. It matters what I say.” Lori was strung tight… angry. Bella and Carl look at each other in confusion at her attitude. Why couldn’t Carl catch frogs with Shane? Lori puts her hand to the back of Carl’s head, “Go on back to camp. I'll be right behind you.”

Carl looks on in confusion but listens to his mom, putting the net down and beginning to walk away.

“Why don’t you go along with him, Princess?” Bella looks up to her dad- she didn’t want to leave yet… the water was nice and she hadn’t finished her drawing and she says as much. Shane nods his head and motions towards the group of ladies farther down the shore where they were washing laundry. “Go with the ladies.”

Bella simply nods her head picking her stuff up to move over to the group leaving behind Lori and Shane, and Carl who made his way up to camp- watched over by Dale on top of the RV.

Approaching the ladies, Bella takes stock of everyone there; Jaqui, Andrea, Amy, Carol… and Ed who sat on the truck hitch smoking a cigarette. “Tired of the boys already?” Jaqui questions watching Bella come closer.

Bella gives the woman a soft smile, “A bit.” Jacqui was one of the only women in camp she relatively liked, having not talked with most of them. “Do you need help?” She asks looking towards the piles of clothes the women still had to clean.

Carol, a thin woman with a worn face and a closely shaved head brought a bucket over for Bella to sit, “Come on, I’ll show you.” She says sitting back down and waiting for Bella to place her sketchbook down in a safe place.

Sitting with the ladies, they lead her through the steps in cleaning on an old washboard- all while giving her little tips on how to do it quicker. Bella finally cleans her first shirt in the time it takes the others to clean five shirts each. With a sigh, she grabs for another shirt, “This is annoying.”

The ladies laugh in agreement and continue their work- dropping into conversation about everything they missed. “I do miss my Maytag, it makes this much easier.” Carol says, directing the end of the sentence towards Bella informing her of what a Maytag was.

“I miss my Benz…” Says Andrea as though she was remembering a life that had come and gone years ago. “My sat nav.”

Jacqui smiles as she rings out a towel.“I miss my coffeemaker with that dual-drip filter and built-in grinder, honey.” Her voice is floaty and dreamy as she thinks about her coffeemaker.

Amy joins in listing everything she misses, “My computer…” Bella nods in agreement, missing her tablet. “And texting.” Amy continues.

The conversation goes quiet for a mere moment before Andrea stops her work and looks out to the water, “I miss my vibrator.”

The women burst into laughter at Andreas' comment. Leaning forward after a slight turn of her head Carol leans towards Andrea, “Me too.” She says, causing the group to continue laughing.

But there is only one not laughing- Bella sits on her bucket in confusion with no idea why the women were laughing so hard, “What’s a ‘vibrator’?” She asks leaning forward in the same manner as Carol, as though it was supposed to be a secret.

It causes the women to laugh even harder, the sound echoing inside the quarry’s white walls. But with the laughter comes Ed… stalking up behind the women causing them to go quiet, “What's so funny?” He asks, some of the women rolling their eyes and Carol going silent.

A smile still dancing on her face Andrea looks over her shoulder, “Just swapping war stories, Ed.” She says, her face dropping in annoyance at the visual site of Ed.

Ed was a man like Merle but he was simple with his bad nature… hidden. Andrea looks back at Ed when she feels his presence remain at their backs, “Problem, Ed?”

“Nothin' that concerns you.” He blows out a lung full of smoke into the air, “And you ought to focus on your work. This ain't no comedy club.” He says turning onto Carol.

“No need to worry Mr. Peletier,” Bella says to the man reassuringly, “We can work and joke.”

Ed looks at her with spite, “A grown-up is speaking- you ought to keep your mouth shut.” He tells her, his hand tightening as though he wanted to do more than just talk.

The group of ladies pull back in disgust at his attitude- especially towards a child. And tension tightens as Andrea stands up shirt in hand, “Ed, tell you what… you don't like how your laundry is done, you are welcome to pitch in and do it yourself. Here.” The wet shirt is tossed to Ed who grabs it and violently throws it back into Andreas’ face.

Andrea was an ‘outspoken’ and sometimes, annoying, person but she would not let anyone be abused or disrespected especially by someone like Ed.

“Ain't my job, missy.” Ed says as though it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“What is your job, Ed?” Andrea spits, standing up taller to Ed who stares her down continuing to suck at the butt of his cig, “Sitting on your ass smoking cigarettes? Talking down to a child?”

Ed huffs a laugh, “Well, it sure as hell ain't listening to some uppity smart-mouthed bitch.” Ed says his confidence growing as he realizes it's just him and a bunch of women, stuck in a quarry alone in a world where there are no more laws.

“Language.” Bella says simply on reflex, having heard Shane say the same thing.

Ed cackles spitting down in Bella’s direction, “Look a smart-mouth bitch in the making.” He turns his attention to Carol with the group of ladies finally silent, “Tell you what… come on. Let's go.”

“I don't think she needs to go anywhere with you, Ed.”

“And I say it's none of your business.” Ed raises his hand beckoning Carol to go with him, the woman’s body tight with fear at Ed’s tone. “Come on now. You heard me.”

Andrea tries stopping Carol, grabbing her arm and pulling Carol back. Stomping his fat legs closer Ed flicks his cig at Andrea, watching it bounce off her chest. “Hey, don't think I won't knock you on your ass just 'cause you're some college-educated cooze, alright?” The women look at Ed in disgust, “Now you come on now or you gonna regret it later.” Ed threatens Carol.

Jacqui, having moved over to stand in front of Bella, spoke up, “So she can show up with fresh bruises later, Ed?” Ed looks at Jacqui, face almost uncaring. “Yeah, we've seen them.”

Ed laughs again, as though everything they said was nothing but a bad joke, “Stay out of this. Now come on! You know what? This ain't none of y'all's business.” He spits motioning again for Carol to follow him- she tries but can’t Andrea, Amy, and Jacqui will not let her walk away with a man like Ed. “You don't want to keep prodding the bull here, okay? Now I am done talking. Come on.”

Ed moves to grab at Carol but the women yell and shout at the man to leave them alone.

“Just leave us alone!” Bella shouts at Ed moving closer to Amy who Ed has grabbed at the bicep. Bella grabs Amy’s arm trying to pull it from Ed’s grasp.

But the big man merely pushes Bella harshly to the ground causing the women to freeze for a moment- long enough for Ed to grab Carol and raise his hand, “You don't tell me what! I tell you what!” His hand lands hard on Carol’s cheek. The abuse he just put on both a child and his wife caused the women to fully start screaming and fighting back.

But the hits from Andrea did little to Ed who reached once more to Carol who was hidden behind Amy- Jacqui bent down next to Bella.

It didn’t matter though. Since Ed had approached the women, Shane was tracking him with his eyes. And the moment Ed laid his hands on Bella was the moment Shane began his descent onto the group.

The shouts were muffled in Shane’s blood-pumping ears- the anger of the conversation with Lori and the fact that Ed, a pathetic excuse of a grown man, had laid his hands on his daughter was the only thing he heard.

Grabbing at the back of the man’s shirt, Shane drags Ed away from the ladies before throwing him to the rocky ground not even twenty feet away. Ed demands Shane let him go but he does not listen.

With his right fist raised Shane pummels Ed’s face, he watches as his face becomes bruised and bloody, the bones of Ed’s face breaking under the force of Shane’s hits.

The screams of the ladies do nothing to stop the repeated hits Shane forces onto Ed’s face. It’s only when Bella’s voice comes shouting does Shane stop his hits to grab at Ed’s already swelling face.

Shane promises Ed death if he lays his hands on his daughter ever again- a death more painful than he could ever dream of. He promises to beat Ed till he stops breathing if he ever touches another person in the camp again.

Once Ed weakly mumbles his understanding does Shane stand up from his chest. Bella darts from behind Jacqui running up to Shane as Carol drops next to Ed. “Daddy?! Your hand!” Bella cries, grabbing at the ripped knuckled hand.

Shane merely grabs under Bella’s arms placing her on his hip grabbing the back of her head as she forces her face into his neck. “Come on, my sweet girl.” He whispers as he walks away to camp, leaving an apologetic Carol crying over a beaten Ed and confused women staring at the aftermath of Shane’s beating.

The day continues with Amy and Andrea acquiring a large amount of fish for dinner and Jim digging a number of holes which end with him forcefully tied to a tree after he tried to hit Shane with the shovel he used. Night approaching in the hours to come.

Chapter Text

Bella sits shoulder to knee with Shane, slowly following the knife motions he makes with her own knife in her hand. The pair were fileting the abundance of fish Andrea and Amy had gathered along with others in the camp.

The process of fileting a fish came easier to Bella than trying to clean the clothes in the quarry. Shane was intent on teaching his daughter everything, not wanting her to grow up and rely on anyone else- anyone except him. If he was going to raise a little girl, he was going to make sure she was set up and ready to face the world with no fear.

Even if that meant breaking the rules once in a while like taking her to work or teaching her how to use a knife.

With Bella’s fish done, she walks over to a bucket of clean water to clean off her hands before slowly wandering over to Carl- the camp almost in a daze.

Rick, Glenn, Daryl, and T-Dog have only been gone for a few hours- yet it's felt like an eternity… every second feeling like a lifetime. The city was a graveyard and to go back for Merle, a man who would surely kill Rick, T-Dog, and Glenn for leaving him… it was a suicide mission.

And now with Jim having fallen into a fit of insanity- digging holes with no rhythm or reason… and Ed attacking two people- it feels as though the world is slipping back into the frenzy it felt when the attacks of the dead first started.

But Shane, Dale, and Morales did everything they could to pull the group back together. Leading everyone back to their chores and reassuring that everything would be okay; Ed will never touch another person, Jim will come back from the heatstroke he surely has, and the group of men will safely return, guns- and Merle- with them.

Resting, well more tied, against a tree with thick leaves that create a strong shadow on the ground is Jim. When Shane had pulled the shovel from his hands- he led Jim to the tree tying knots that he wouldn’t be able to undo even if they were sitting in front of him.

Shane feels guilty forcing Jim to the tree with Bella and Carl watching from the side, but it needed to be done- he wouldn’t let anyone be in danger. And now treading softly alongside Dale, “Jim, take some water?” He says approaching the sun burned man.

Eyes slowly coming back from a daze, Jim lifts his head, “All right.”

Shane gives a small smile lifting the jug of water to Jim’s mouth, “Yeah? All right. Here you go, bud.” Jim greedily drinks the water, ice cold to his burning body. Pulling the jug back Shane stops Jim not wanting him to get sick.

“Pour some on my head?” Jim asks, dropping his head forward so the water will go down his back. The water almost sizzles off Jim’s hot skin but brings clarity to Jim’s eyes. Jim releases a long sigh, eyes finding Shane’s as others gather around the tree, “How long you gonna keep me like this?” Jim questions.

“Until I don't think that you're a danger to yourself or others.”

Jim nods in understanding, everyone’s face was etched with sadness, “Sorry if I scared your boy and your little girl.” He says towards Carol and Lori before turning towards Shane, “I’m sorry for what I said about your girl.”

Shane’s face pulls taunt before relaxing into a forced smile. When the group had confronted Jim, he said many things- that Shane shouldn’t have confronted Ed, that Carol and Ed’s marriage was their problem and that Bella getting pushed by Ed was her fault… if a child tries acting like an adult, then they're going to get treated like one. That comment didn’t sit well with anyone- especially Shane… who may have held a tighter grip on Jim’s arms than necessary.

But now, the camp goes about their days preparing for the biggest fish fry and dinner they’ve had since the world went to shit.

The smell of grilling fish seasoned with mismatched seasonings from the RV drifts through the camp, dragging everyone over for dinner. The air feels light with the prospect of food, laughter starting to bubble in the chests of everyone as they sit around the warming fire and the darkening sky sharing stories and conversion as though everything is normal.

Passing the random plates of food around everyone grabs at bits and pieces- the only people missing from the circle of bodies being a beaten Ed, a few mismatched people that rarely showed their faces, and the group of men that have yet to come back from the city.

Bella and Carl sit shoulder to shoulder between Shane and Lori, on their respective sides. Carl had dragged a small blanket over for him and Bella to share- the nights were getting colder and the days hotter. “Pass the fish, please.” Carl calls out, the plastic tray of pieces of cooked fish making its way over.

The small conversation slowly dies out as everyone picks at their food and Morales asks a burning question, “That watch. What’s with it?” He questions Dale as he’s gently playing with the watch laying on his wrist. Heads perk up at the question, waiting for a response.

Dale was an old man- a poetic old man, and every day at the same time he would rest back and wind the watch as though he was the village’s priest saying mass.

And the act confused many within the camp, “Unless I've misread the signs, the world seems to have come to an end,” Jaqui states when Dale announces his confusion about his watch. “At least hit a speed bump for a good long while.”

“But there's you every day winding that stupid watch.” Morales states with a light laughter breaking through his words.

“Time… it's important to keep track, isn't it? The days at least.” Looking around all Dale sees is faces that still don’t understand the purpose. “Don't you think, Andrea? Back me up here.” Andrea shrugs her shoulders as if saying to not ask her. “I like… I like what, um, a father said to son when he gave him a watch that had been handed down through generations… He said, ‘I give you the mausoleum of all hope and desire, which will fit your individual needs no better than it did mine or my fathers' before me; I give it to you not that you may remember time, but that you may forget it for a moment now and then and not spend all of your breath trying to conquer it.’” He recites smoothly, eyes staring at his watch as he spoke but with a slight raise of his eyes, he is met with the faces of lack-luster concern.

Amy is the first one to speak up, “You are so weird.” Everyone laughs at Amy’s words, agreeing silently.

Dale tries to explain who’s words they were but the message he tried to convey still did not reach those in the circle.

The small conversations resume as everyone relaxes- the night air drifts gently against everyone’s skin, bringing with it a blanket of calm. The world had not stopped running since the fall, had not released a calm breath into the air… but now surrounded by a group of people that would’ve never been acquainted before the outbreak, it felt as though things were calming down- that things would get better. And who wouldn’t want the world to get better after everything that has happened?

With bellies getting filled, Bella rests her tired head against her father’s leg, his hand drifting mindlessly to her hair. The conversation flows easily around the fire but takes a short break as Amy silently stands to leave.

Andrea perks up swiftly, eyes tracking her sister, “Where are you going?” She questions drawing the attention of the group.

Amy’s eyes widen and she curls inwards, “I have to pee.” She states moving towards the RV, “Jeez, you try to be discreet around here…” She says, causing everyone to laugh and turn back to the fire and their conversation.

With Amy walking away, Carl hands over his plate of remaining fish towards Bella, the girl having not touched a piece of food since sitting down, “You haven’t eaten.” He says in offering.

Bella shakes her head as she curls away from the offensive smelling fish, “I don’t like fish- you know that.” Carl rolls his eyes and finishes his plate, all while making dramatic chewing and content noises towards Bella.

Bella laughs weakly pushing at Carl’s shoulder and reaches over for the can of beans next to his leg. Carl whines jokingly at his stolen food but drops it as Bella starts eating- the pair has stolen food from each other since they could use their hands, the action did not bother Carl in the slightest.

Chewing on the lukewarm beans Bella relaxes once more as Amy’s voice sounds out behind her, “We're out of toilet paper?” She calls out from the door of the RV. Head turned, Bella looks towards Amy, “Why didn’t anyone say anything?” She complains loudly- the lack of toilet paper upsetting especially in the new world.

People laugh gently at Amy’s words keeping their back turned to the girl waiting for her to come back to the fire. With the sigh, Amy takes a few steps to the dirt ground with her grip holding the door but her approach back to the fire is cut short as a corpse grabs her arm and takes a bite.

Amy’s bloody curdling scream freezes the camp as the walker bites and pulls at Amy’s flesh- blood jumps to the air quickly from the wound, falling to the ground faster than people can blink- the flesh pulling like a rubber band that snaps clean from the arm.

Everyone jumps to their feet, Shane is the first one to stand, handgun raised and taking a swift shot to the walker's head dropping it where it stands. With the one walker dead everyone is frozen, even Amy and Andrea as they stare at each other- waiting for more walkers to attack Amy. But they don’t go for her.

Seemingly dozens of walkers growl and stumble into the open- bloody screams following after Amy as the walkers find meals of living flesh. The screams send the ground into a frenzy, Shane drawing his shotgun as others pull close to each other and away from the dead- as though grasping to the living will save them from the dead.

Carl and Bella grab at each other quickly, squeezing themselves between their parents as Shane pulls the trigger, dropping everything that comes towards them, “Mom!” Carl shouts towards his mother, holding tightly to her shirt.

The men of the group move quickly swinging and shooting everything that was dead as Andrea screamed her cries as she watches Amy’s get attacked once more, a walker coming behind her weak form and biting at her neck, right where it meets her shoulder.

The flesh pulls easily, easier than one would expect, and the smell of copper blankets the camp entirely. Running to her little sister, Andrea cries but she is pushed aside as Jim swings hard at the walker's head, killing it in one hit. Through the screaming and gun shots, Andrea cradles Amy and holds her hand to the wound on her neck begging anyone that could hear her to save her little sister… but Amy continues to bleed, just as the screams continue to sound in camp.

Walkers continue to flood out of the woods, the bodies of the living and the dead getting mixed in the darkness. “Shane, what do we do? Shane?!” Lori cries out as she holds tightly to Carl and Bella.

Morales swings his bat before screaming out, “Follow me!” Morales' family follows him closely as he moves towards the RV, the one little safe haven they have from the dead.

Shane follows with his back toward the vehicle, a physical shield between his family and the dead, “Come on, y'all! Work your way up here!” He calls out taking a swift shot at a walker that storms towards Carol and Sophia. The mother-daughter pair move quickly to join the others as more living join the semicircle around the RV, and more dead join the feeding frenzy by the fire and the approach to the living.

With the dread of the dead getting closer, Lori pushes Bella and Carl farther behind herself, “Stay with me. Both of you!” She shouts her voice dripping with fear as she grasps at the back of Shane’s sweat-soaked black shirt.

“Come on, make your way to the Winnebago!” With the chaos still raining, the future of a painful death settles in everyone’s stomach as the dead begin outnumbering the living and the numbers of bullets left.

But war cries fill the camp as the group of men from the city come storming into the camp- guns firing and bodies dropping quickly. Rick, Glenn, Daryl, and T-Dog join the living and wipe the camp clean of any more living dead- the whisper of death silenced by the cries of relief.

Rick whips his head around the camp, eyes searching sharply for his family, “Baby! Carl!” He cries out at the sight of his family. Carl calls back wanting to run to his father’s arms, but Lori keeps her strong grip on his arm- everyone still on edge.

Tears form in Rick’s eyes as he begins walking towards his family, a hopefully smile forming on his face. But the smile is forced away as a fresh walker grabs at Rick- the walker, a recently turned camper… the fastest turn seen yet. The walker and Rick spin and tussle- the still living muscle of the walker's body becomes stronger with the disease controlling the corpse.

Everyone raises their guns and begins screaming, “Push him away!” Shane shouts as he tries lining up a shot, Daryl and Glenn trace the walker as well but can’t find a shot.

Screaming continues as the walkers move swiftly towards Rick’s neck, teeth bloody and shimmering with hopes of food… and a single shot sounds out. The body drops lifelessly into Rick, who lets the limp body fall to the ground- droplets of blood now dancing on his face.

With the body on the ground and no more movement heard, heads turn to the source of the shot- and there they see small shaking hands wrapped around so tightly around the gun the girl’s knuckles are turning white. Bella had pulled the trigger, she had taken the gun from her father's pants and pulled the trigger, the target so close to Rick’s head.

Bella’s eyes look at Shane, quickly filling with tears and her chest sucking in air she doesn’t need, “I’m sorry, Daddy…” She cries as her hands fall limp, Shane dropping his shotgun and pulling the gun from Bella’s hands quickly, “I’m so sor-” Shane throws the gun to the side and hugs Bella tight, squeezing her close to his chest- the little girl grappling tightly to her father.

Everyone moves in a daze as tears are shed and hugs are shared. Jim looked down at everyone and said a single line almost to himself, “I remember my dream now, why I dug the holes.”

Chapter Text

The camp rests in a blanket of pain, silence, and disbelief.

Everyone had believed they were safe- that the thing they had to worry about was a group of scummy living humans coming to take everything they had, everything they built. But they were wrong- the dead had found them… even so far hidden- they weren’t safe.

Side by side, Bella and Carl pick up cups and loose items littered on the ground from the frenzy. Bella looks at her friend as he mindlessly places his items into a bin to deal with later, “Are you okay?” She asks quietly.

Carl barely raises his head, “I’m fine.”

“You’re lying.” Bella responds easily, Carl and Bella always talk to each other, and it was obvious when one was hiding something, “What’s wrong?”

With a raise of his head, Carl’s eyes look at his friend, “I didn’t sleep last night.”

Bella nods sadly, “I’m sorry.”

Carl looks at Bella who turns back to picking up items, “Are you okay?” He questions back to his friend- it seemed as though the events of the past night barely affected Bella.

And Bella turned her head with a raised eyebrow, “Why wouldn’t I be?”

Carl was taken aback as he usually was. It seemed as though certain things didn’t bother Bella in the slightest- even before the outbreak. But now, what happened… it was different, “Well… last night- you killed a walker.”

“It’s okay.” She responds as she tries a small knot between two ropes so the pair could pull up the fallen canopy fabric of a tent. Carl merely sighs and grabs the rope in joint with Bella.

Pulling, the pair erects the tenet up straight, Bella leading the end of the rope towards a solid support to tie it up- with Carl holding tightly Bella turns her back as a growling hand grabs at Carl’s ankle, “Dad!” Carl screams as he releases the rope. Another walker? Why couldn’t the camp catch a break?

Pulling his leg back, Carl leads the walker corpse out from under the tent. Moving quickly Bella grabs at Carl’s leg that the walker is gripping tightly. With the screams of the children, Daryl is the first to move towards the pair- the pickaxe in his hands landing hard on the walker's head sending Carl and Bella falling backwards.

The friends grip tightly at each other holding each other close as the walker stills. It’s only with the arrival of Rick does the pair release their tight grips on each other- Rick pulling his arms around both of them, looking over their exposed skin for any cuts or bites, “Are you both okay?” He questions quickly grabbing at their heads, “Did it get you?” Rick's voice is laced in fear as he looks at Carl, but with Carl’s shake of his head Rick sighs loudly and holds the pair close.

The embrace is cut short as Shane comes running up, grabbing his daughter. Shane holds Bella tight and makes sure Carl is okay before bringing both Carl and Bella towards the RV to calm down in a safe place.

If the camp was settling down, they weren’t anymore. Everyone was wound back up tight, moving about the camp as though there was danger around every corner. And it was, it was waiting for the perfect moment to pounce.

Sitting under the RV canopy Rick settles down next to Bella as she sketches on her book, drawing nothing of any resemblance. Carl moves in front of them helping his mother clean under her watchful eye.

Looking down to the young girl, Rick leans to look at her sketch, “What are you drawing?”

Bella sighs and pulls away from the paper, “I don’t know, Mr. Grimes.” She states in a small voice, waiting for Rick to continue.

Rick sighs once more, leaning on his knees towards the young girl- Rick had been repeating this conversation in his head since last night. The little girl had killed a walker… killed a person- she saved Rick, even with all the time he had to think… How was he supposed to talk to Bella about this? He helped raise the little girl alongside his son and she saved him- a child.

“I wanted- I-” Rick starts but stumbles off. Bella looks towards Rick waiting for the man to speak, “I wanted to thank you… for last night.” He speaks softly towards the girl, watching her face pull into a slight smile, “But- you shouldn’t have done that.” Rick tacks on forcing confusion into Bella’s features.

“Daddy says we have to protect each other,” She responds looking at the older man, her words seem to add years to his face. “You would’ve done the same for me.”

Rick laughs gently, “You’re right… we gotta protect each other. But what you did-” He slows down, it seems as though Bella doesn’t understand the weight of what happened. “You shouldn’t need to do that. You’re just a kid.”

“It’s okay, Mr. Grimes.” Bella whispers to Rick, “Daddy says I shouldn’t have done it- but,” Bella pauses in thinking, moving her eyes from Rick to the far figure of Carl, “You’re my family… and we gotta look after each other."

Rick laughs gently at Bella patting her hair in reassurance and care, “You’re absolutely right, Bella… thank you.” He says before pulling the young girl into a tight hug. Bella gives Rick a small smile as she pulls back and Shane moves towards the pair to pick his daughter up- pulling her away from Rick.

The day goes on, the sun rises higher heating the air- cooking the dead flesh in camp into a disgusting combination. And a mere fifty feet away, a group stands looking towards Andrea who has not moved from above her dead sister since she took her final breath.

Amy lays dead, eyes closed and skin a pale sickly blue- when a person is bitten and they die, they come back as a walker unless the head is destroyed and Andrea hasn’t allowed anyone near her sister. When Rick came up to the sister duo, Andrea pulled out her gun aimed directly at Rick’s head, her hand deathly still almost as though she was daring Rick to touch her baby sister.

Rick apologized as he stumbled away, the drawing of the gun shocking him. Back in the group, it was determined to just leave Andrea alone but a close eye would be kept on the ticking walker time bomb that was Amy.

Dragging bodies into piles, Daryl, Morales, Jim, and Glenn separate them- those that they knew and those that they didn’t. The people they didn’t know would be burned and those they did would be buried in the number of graves Jim had dug the day before- the only camper they knew that would be burned would be Ed, his body a mere skeleton after the walkers’ meal and Carol’s mercy strikes to his head with Daryl’s pickaxe.

Working throughout the day and forgetting lunch- no one could eat and keep the food down- the camp was starting to clean up. Jacqui picks up fallen cloth, throwing the soiled pieces into a discard pile and keeping the salvageable pieces separated. Next to Jacqui Bella works with her throwing items into one pile or the other. Shane tried to get Bella to just sit down but the girl wanted to do something.

With a bloody frying pan in her hands Bella looks towards Jacqui, “Ms. Jacqui? What should I do with this?” She holds the pan with a few fingers as though the item was infested, keeping it far away from her body.

Jaqui laughs as her hands pull at items, “Put it to the side for now, sweetie. We’ll ask your dad later.” She states as the girl nods and throws the pan away from herself between the throw away pile and the keep pile- a new ‘maybe’ pile.

Together they work quickly through the items with Jim dragging nearby bodies away. With most of the items dealt with, Jim asks Jaqui for help with moving the bodies, the action of pulling the dead weight finally catching up to him.

Jacqui stands without fuss and moves to help the man but stops short at the slight beading of blood on the man’s shirt, “Are you bleeding?” Jacqui asks with concern from her bent down position.

Jim gulps dryly with a shake of his head bending down to grab the corpse's hands, “I just got some on me from the bodies.”

Jacqui doesn’t move a muscle, her face turning taunt and her voice sharp, “That blood is fresh. Were you bit?” She questions with concern.

“No. I got scratched during the attack.”

“You got bit.” Jacqui states at Jim’s fearful face, her body springs up and creates a wall between Jim and the young girl by her side.

“I'm fine.”

“Then show me.” She shoots back.

Jim’s eyes dart around the camp hoping no one has heard their conversation, “Don't tell, please.” He begs as he takes a small step forward with his hands out in front of him as though Jacqui could gift the secret to his greedy hands.

Jacqui stumbles back to Bella, her voice rising loudly, “A walker got him. A walker bit Jim!” Her words force everyone into motion, drawing the camp towards the trio and surrounding Jim as though he was a rabid animal that was going to snap at any moment.

“I'm okay. I'm okay.” Jim says.

Daryl, pickaxe tight in his hands, approaches Jim pointing the weapon towards the man, “Show it to us. Show it to us!” He shouts, his southern accent bleeding through.

Jim breathes hard as he pulls his own weapon, a shove, to the front of his body in defense, “Easy, Jim.” Shane calls stepping forward.

“Grab him!” Someone shouts.

From behind T-Dog moves swiftly, knocking the shovel from Jim’s hands by pulling both of his arms to his back. Daryl grasps the blood and sweat soaked shirt on Jim and lifts to reveal a perfect bite mark staining Jim’s ribs.

All the while Jim speaks, “I’m okay,” repeating it to everyone- reassuring everyone, or more likely, reassuring himself.

With Jim bit, the group is tense with concern and suspension- what are they to do? A bite means death, means you will become a walker unless… you save yourself.

Grouped together, everyone speaks about what to do as they stare down Jim who sits at the butt of the RV. “I say we put a pickaxe in his head and the dead girl's and be done with it.” Daryl speaks simply, pulling the conversations into one.

Shane sighs as he holds Bella tight on his hip, the girl attaching herself and not letting go of his neck, “Is that what you'd want if it were you?”

“Yeah, and I'd thank you while you did it.” He speaks honestly.

“I hate to say it…” Dale sighs sadly looking at Jim’s figure, “I never thought I would… but maybe Daryl's right.” He speaks looking back towards the group.

Rick sputters in his place, eyeing Dale like he went insane, “Jim's not a monster, Dale, or- or some rabid dog.” Dale goes to speak, his hands raising to explain but Rick continues, “He's sick. A sick man.” Rick spits harshly, “We start down that road, where do we draw the line?”

“The line's pretty clear.” Daryl speaks back, “Zero tolerance for walkers, or them to be.” He points towards Jim with the pickaxe in his hand.

Rick sighs deeply- Rick didn’t understand, why was no one saying anything? Why was no one speaking with Rick? Wanting to save Jim? It’s as though all thoughts of humanity left the group in front of him for fear, “What if we can get him help? I heard the C.D.C. was working on a cure.”

Shane nods his head, “I heard that too. Heard a lot of things before the world went to hell.”

“What if the C.D.C. is still up and running?”

“Man, that is a stretch right there.”

“Why?” Rick questions, “If there's any government left, any structure at all, they'd protect the C.D.C. at all costs, wouldn't they?” He speaks, hoping someone would agree- someone would stand with Rick, “I think it's our best shot. Shelter, protection…”

Shane nods, his left hand sticks out in motion to calm Rick down, “Okay, Rick, you want those things, all right? I do too, okay?” He states, looking to his brother, “Now if they exist, they're at the army base. Fort Benning.”

“That's 100 miles in the opposite direction.” Lori says looking between the two men.

Shane agrees looking around the group, “That is right. And it's away from the hot zone.” He states, the cities were a bad zone and the CDC was right in the bad zone, “Now listen to me. If that place is operational, it'll be heavily armed. We'd be safe there.”

“The military were on the front lines of this thing. They got overrun. We've all seen that.” He draws strongly, eyes wide with concern, “The C.D.C. is our best choice and Jim's only chance.”

The group stands in silence thinking of their options when the one young voice of the group speaks up, “Why don’t you ask Mr. Jim?” Bella questions from her spot under Shane chin, “No one’s asked him what he wants… maybe he doesn’t want to go.”

Rick’s eyes soften gently at the girl, “We aren’t going to let him die-”

“Everyone that gets bit dies, Mr. Grimes.” Bella interrupts the man simply. The adults of the group merely bow their heads in agreement as Shane touches the back of Bella’s head.

Rick looks startled as Bella, her father merely looking back at Rick with a face that said ‘sadly it’s true’. Jacqui nods her eyes leaving Jim’s hunched form, “I’ve seen people get bit- they get a fever… they die a painful death.” She explains to the man.

“Jim’s not dead yet.” Rick states. Rick may have not lived through the outbreak but he was here now and he wasn’t going to give up on someone.

But even being here now, Rick was blind to the truth- blind to why the outbreak destroyed the world within a day… the disease was meant to kill the living, “He will be.” Bella responds to Rick, the statement catching the group off guard and sending a heavy stone to their gut.

But even with the truth spoken out loud, Daryl knew they wouldn't do the right thing and with his hands balled in rage he spoke swiftly, “Y’all go look for aspirin, do what you need to do.” He spits lifting the pickaxe properly into his hands, “Someone needs to have some balls to take care of this damn problem!” He shouts louder as his heels turn to Jim and the pickaxe raises to the air.

Shouts of horror and concern fill the space, Jim twisting in his place to protect himself poorly from the enraged man. Quickly behind the man, Rick pushes the barrel of his gun into the back of Daryl’s head, freezing the redneck in his place, “We don't kill the living.” Rick states.

Daryl drops the pickaxe and turns on Rick with a fierce eye, “That's funny coming from a man who just put a gun to my head.” He spits as Shane comes forward, his daughter standing behind with Lori and Jacqui.

“We may disagree on some things, not on this.” Shane speaks about himself and Rick, “You put it down. Go on.” He commands easily. Daryl throws the pickaxe to the ground, spitting alongside it before stalking off away from the RV to cool his hot head.

With Daryl walking away, Rick holsters his gun before grabbing at Jim’s arm dragging him away to, “Somewhere safe.”

Once Jim is hidden away, the group turns to Andrea as Amy rises from the dead. And with tears in her eyes Andera apologizes to her baby sister for everything she’s done and says goodbye with a shot to Amy’s head.

As the air cools down, everyone gathers together by the graves for a moment of silence. The camp grows tense with the new reality- they need to leave, it’s not safe and they have a man that needs help.

Relationships are fracturing, Shane and Rick in disagreement with Lori not fully standing with one or the other.

But as the sun starts its descent into night Shane and Rick gather everyone together, “I've been, uh… I've been thinking about Rick's plan.” Shane starts looking around to everyone, “Now look, there are no… There are no guarantees either way. I'll be the first one to admit that.” Rick and Shane look towards each other before he continues, “I've known this man a long time. I trust his instincts.” A sigh escapes him as everyone is dropped under a blanket of exhaustion, “I say the most important thing here is we need to stay together. So those of you that agree, we leave first thing in the morning for the CDC.”

Chapter Text

As the train of cars drives away from their little camp, Bella sits beside her father- the harsh dry hot wind breezes past their faces in the open Jeep. Morales and his family had left the larger group in search of their family with Daryl scoffing as Shane and Rick handed over a book of ammo- they needed the ammo… Morales and his family won’t survive on their own even with all the ammunition in the world.

Shane may not have voiced his similar opinion, but Bella could see it written across his face, “You're not happy.” Bella speaks simply looking out to the road that leaves as quickly as it comes.

Shane sighs and readjusts himself in his seat, “I’m fine, Princess.” His response is strained, and the father-daughter duo shares a look between themselves, a look that spoke the words they didn’t need too. He was lying… and they both knew that. “I’m worried about going to the C.D.C. Ain’t nothing gonna be there.” He speaks freely, looking back to the road.

The only reason the train of cars was heading to the CDC was because Jim was dying- but no matter what anyone said, Rick wouldn’t listen- he won’t give up on a man that’s already dead.

“It will be okay.” Bella tells Shane.

Shane releases a dry laugh at his daughter’s words… she sounded so sure, “How do you know that, Princess?”

It was with a small smile that Bella responds, “Cause we’re all together- and that’s all that matters.”

And like the scenery, Bella’s words drift away- left behind with the rotting city.

It seems like hours go by as the cars continue on- the tanks of gas lasting longer than expected. But it’s not the empty gas tanks that stop the train of car’s- it’s the pop-snap-and-steaming of the RV’s engine that pulls the cars to a stop.

With the area deemed safe everyone climbs out of their vehicles, cracking and popping their sore muscles. Carl and Sophia remain within the car they traveled in- Rick giving them a stern command to stay even as Bella walks by behind her father.

Approaching the front of the RV, Dale stands with bursts of smoke escaping to the air. Rick comes in close as though his mere presence would fix the problem, “I told you we'd never get far on that hose.” Dale speaks to Rick, “I said I needed the one from the cube van.”

Rick sighs heavily, staring down the engine before turning towards Dale, “Can you jury-rig it?”

“That's all it's been so far.” Dale’s words cause a collective group sigh- of all the things going on in the world, a broken radiator hose was something they didn’t need to deal with, “It's more duct tape than hose… and I'm out of duct tape.”

“I see something up ahead.” Shane speaks as he draws away his binoculars from his face, “A gas station if we're lucky.” He directs to Rick- if it was a gas station, maybe they could find a hose… or more duct tape.

But before any words can be spoken, the quick steps and slamming of the RV door sounds out- Jacqui at the source. “Y'all, Jim… It's bad.” She almost cries- her dark skin had taken on a sickly hue glossed over by a sheen of sweat, the pain and guilt of watching Jim taking a great toll on her, “I don't think he can take anymore.” Her words end with a turn of her body as she rushes back to Jim who sits in the back of the RV in gnawing pain.

The ride has been hell to the man. The bite of the walker was causing unbearable pain through his very being. The disease was meant to kill the living… and dying wasn’t painless.

Everyone’s concern twisted in their chests- people’s eyes turning glossy in concern, too much was happening at once, “Hey, Rick, you want to hold down the fort?” Shane says, less as a question and more as a forewarning, “I'll drive ahead, see what I can bring back.”

T-Dog nods along grabbing a bucket and hose from a nearby car, “Yeah, I'll come along too, and I'll back you up.”

Shane nods once Rick gives his agreeing nods in turn, “Y'all keep your eyes open now. We'll be right back.” He says, before looking towards Bella who takes a step forward.

“Can I go with you, daddy?”

Shane shakes his head immediately, “Stay with Carl.” He commands, bending down to kiss her forehead before turning away. Bella watches her father walk down the street till he is merely a blur of color- and she only stops because Lori grabs at her shoulder causing her to flinch away from her touch.

“Why don’t you go sit with Carl and Sophia?” Lori questions leading Bella away with the presence of Lori’s arm hovering over her back.

With the children huddled within a car, everyone begins discussing what to do. Shane and T-Dog found a ‘pathetic but usable’ hose for the RV- words from Dale himself and Jim… he wanted to be left behind.

The man was in agony… and all he wanted was to die. But Rick, Shane- no one- wanted to leave him behind, how could they leave a living breathing human behind to die by himself? They’re so close to the CDC- they could save him.

But Jim wasn’t going to let them. He didn’t want to be saved- he wanted to die. He wants to be with his family.

And with the sunlight ticking away, the group said their goodbyes… gave their hopes and prayers to Jim before climbing back into their cars and driving away.

Gathered in the RV, Bella sits alongside Dale and Glenn in the front- the young mam showing Bella how to read the map even though she ‘already knew how to’- she didn’t. Not very well at least. But she listened as Glenn explained little details of a map and the tricks to reading it quickly.

Glenn shook the map flat and pulled it between himself and Bella, “You gotta make sure you know what the scale is on the map- that way you could figure out the distance and time it takes to get wherever you want to go.” He explains, holding the map steady so the young girl could search for the scale Glenn kept mentioning.

Bella mules over the map, eyes darting across the colorful and detailed map to find the scale. With the scale found Bella listens closely as Glenn explains how to figure out the distance left to the CDC. The math involved was easy for Bella- the young girl having done good in her class, according to her teacher Mrs. Mueller. “How can you read it so easily, Mr. Glenn?” She asks when Glenn swiftly responds to a seemingly difficult question regarding directions.

Glenn laughed, his brown eyes crinkling on his youthful face, “I would always have to read maps for work- delivery boy.” He explains as Bella smiles back at him.

“Well, you're definitely better at it than me.”

Dale laughs heartily from beside the pair as he drives the large vehicle, “It takes practice.” Dale speaks simply, “I’m sure you’ll figure it out quick- you’re a smart girl.” Dale’s words mixed with his soft and thoughtful voice brought a genuine soft smile to Bella’s face, the young girl thanking the man for the compliment- just like her daddy taught her.

Continuing the little map lesson, the day ticks on- the group getting closer to the CDC and farther into the walker infested city.

It isn’t long till they do reach their destination and with the approach of the CDC everyone sat rigid watching the building come into view.

The building wasn’t very big- it was fat but not very tall and covered in windows. How was that supposed to be a lab? It didn’t seem very safe- it looked like a movie set. Especially with the bodies that littered the ground.

RV rolling to a stop, Bella leans forward to look out the front window as others in the RV gather behind the trio in the front, “That’s a lot of bodies.” Bella says mostly to herself.

Switching the RV into park, Dale agrees with a heavy sigh, “Yes, it is.”

There must be hundreds of bodies littered on the ground- men, women, and children alike… some were civilians, and some were soldiers. The way they laid together… it was almost like it was a massacre and they now just lay there to rot.

Drawing out of the vehicles, the group gathers together silently- the buzzing of flies that swarm the dead bodies are almost louder than the footsteps on the concrete ground.

Crowded together, the group moves as one past the bodies littered on the ground and towards their- hopefully- safe haven. Pressed close to her father, Bella holds a tight grip to his dirty shirt as he keeps his gun raised, “All right, everybody. Keep moving. Stay quiet. Let's go.” Shane calls out in a whisper-yell, everyone staying on high alert for any movement outside their group.

With quick steps, the hundred-foot jog to the front of the building feels like years. Everyone in the group moves as though one wrong step will set off a bell, dinging their location to every walker that surrounds them.

The city was quiet- so quiet… people could hear their heartbeats in their ears. They could feel the stale air that has not seen a living being in so long enter their lungs. It was too quiet and too loud all at the same time.

Approaching the building, the sights of the shuttered and locked windows and doors finally come into view. Hands reach to touch the shutters as though they were merely hallucinations and not truly blocking their safety. Shane bangs harshly on the shutters startling everyone at the sound.

“There's nobody here.” T-Dog calls out as he searches for any opening.

Rick rounds to the front of the group that dances on the tips of their toes in worry, “Then why are these shutters down?” He responds, hitting at the shutters again, the action doing nothing but unknowingly waking the dead around them- drawing them to the group.

“Try opening them!” Bella calls out from her new spot next to Carl who eagerly nodded along, hoping to get inside soon.

The sky had darkened faster than anyone would have thought. It was as though the universe knew they were searching for safety… but didn’t want to help them.

Shane pulls at the shutters before kicking it in frustration when they don’t move, "They're automatic, Princess. Can’t move them.”

“There’s no other way?!” One of the women of the group calls out, voice covered tightly in worry.

Searching for a way inside, Bella and Carl drift towards the edge of the group and with a simple turn of her head she is faced with a walker fast approaching. A small yelp escapes her throat, the noise going sharper as Carl pulls her back by her upper arm.

The walker’s approach is cut short however as an arrow lands between its eyes, “Walkers!” Daryl calls out as the dead begin to rise around them, as they crawl out from the darkness like a monster from under a child’s bed. “You led us into a graveyard!” Daryl shouts at Rick as he reloads his crossbow.

“He made a call!” Shane defends.

“It was the wrong damn call!”

Shane jumps at Daryl, gripping his shirt and pulling him close, “Just shut up. You hear? Shut up. Shut up!” He shouts before pushing him back, “Rick, this is a dead end.” Shane speaks to Rick who stands in a mixture of disbelief and deep thought.

“Where are we gonna go?!”

Shane gets close to his brother’s ear, “Do you hear me? No blame.”

“Jacqui’s right. We can't be here, this close to the city after dark.” Lori calls back quickly as cries start sounding from Carol, Sophia, and a few others in the group.

“Fort Benning, Rick… Still an option.” Shane almost begs- his voice pleading that Rick just say something.

Andrea pulls into the group as more walkers approach, “On what? No food, no fuel. That's 100 miles.” The sky was getting darker- the air cold with the stench of the dead approaching. And the constant cries and shouts do nothing but draw more walkers to them.

They had nothing but the CDC; nowhere to go, no way to get there, and even if they did, they didn't have enough food or water to make it.

“Forget Fort Benning! We need answers tonight. Now!” Lori calls cutting off any stupid conversation that may come regarding Fort Benning.

Rick wipes his forehead, his gun grip so tight in his hand his knuckles are turning white, “We'll think of something.”

Shane huffs and redirects the group, “Come on, let's go. Let's get out of here.” He calls motioning for everyone to run back to the vehicles not waiting for Rick to agree. The group needed to be safe… Bella, Carl, Lori- they needed to be safe, and Shane was going to make sure of it, “All right, everybody back to the cars. Let's go! Move!” Shane screams to the group, Bella drawing to her dad not leaving without him- but he was waiting for Rick to turn around. The rest of the group stopped with Shane when they didn’t see him or Rick move.

Rick woke from the dead not even a week ago. He dragged his weak and fragile body across a new deadly world to find his family- all he wanted was to find his family to know they were safe… And he found them- but now he needed to keep them safe- him, and he failed them. The weight is coming down on his shoulders. He was so sure the CDC would be safe- would be somewhere they could find refuge. But he was wrong.

Shane grabs at Rick’s arm, his grip begging and anchoring to the man, “Brother… please. We need to go.”

The man’s eyes glisten with unshed tears, Rick nods his head causing them to fall. With one last look, Rick begins to turn after Shane who had released him to start his leave. But it is a simple movement in the corner of his eye that stops him, causing Shane to turn to look at him in disbelief, “The camera… it moved.” Ricks says stepping closer to the building rather than away.

“You imagined it.” Dale calls looking at Rick’s back.

“It moved. It moved.” Ricks says softly looking up at the camera.

“No! Rick, it is dead, man. It's an automated device. It's gears, okay? They're just winding down. Now come on!” Shane begs grabbing at his arm to pull instead of anchoring- they needed to leave, “Man, just listen to me. Look around this place. It's dead, okay? It's dead. You need to let it go, Rick.” Shane shouts angrily, his voice turning hard. It was getting ridiculous- Rick’s obsession with the CDC, who cares?! They needed to be safe now, right now! They didn’t need to die for nothing- it wasn’t going to happen- not on Shane’s watch.

Rick pulls from Shane's grip, pounding his fist on the shutter causing everyone to scream and beg Rick to leave.

“Rick, there's nobody here!” Lori screams out to her husband.

Rick hits again before looking up at the camera- the man believing there was someone there when there were no signs of such, "I know you're in there! I know you can hear me!”

Lori and Shane move to grab at Rick, each grabbing at an arm. Shane yells at his daughter when he hears her voice calling to him, “Princess, stay with Carl!” He pulls at Rick getting a good hold and drawing him back even as he screams at the camera- at the ‘person’ behind it, “Everybody get back to the cars now!” Shane shouts as he drags at Rick like he’s a bag of potatoes.

But Rick pulls free- the man not giving up, “Please, we're desperate. Please help us!” He cries out, “We have women, children, no food, hardly any gas left. We have nowhere else to go!” Rick was desperate- everyone could hear it in his voice, and it caused such sadness in their chests, “Keep your eyes open! If you don't let us in, you're killing us! Please!” He shrieks in agony, “You're killing us! You're killing us! You're killing us!” He cries out one last time as Shane gets a strong grip and tugs at the man finally drawing him away.

The group bundles tight as Rick continues crying out- they are gonna get to the RV, to their vehicles and get far enough away that they're safe- at least able to survive the night. What were they going to do? Just looking out in the darkness, it was going to be a fight to get to their cars, there’s a sea of walkers approaching them.

Dread settles in everyone’s chests, tears falling down their faces without their control or care. And as the group raises their weapons to fight for their lives- light floods from behind them lighting the night as though it was the dawn of a new day.

Chapter Text

Instead of following the light into the next life- the group followed it into the safe haven of the CDC. Guns raised in defense, the group enters swiftly with the door closing immediately once everyone was inside.

The inside of the CDC was clean- so clean it was as though the outbreak never happened, no blood, no bodies, not even a layer of dust. But it was empty- no bodies; dead or living… or the living dead. The building merely echoes with the sound of shoes against stone flooring and the call outs of the group, “Watch for walkers.” They say, even though there seems to be no one- but there was.

Creeping from the darkness of a shadow, a white man dressed in a plain dirty white shirt and khakis almost stumbles his way into the light, a machine gun gripped rather loosely in his hands. His presence draws all the weapons besides Rick’s to the man, he stands there almost… confused?

“Anybody infected?” The man calls out.

Rick drops his head as he answers, Jim’s absence painful, “One of our group was. He didn't make it.” He responds, the man from the shadows still holds his gun up.

“Why are you here? What do you want?”

“A chance.” Rick calls out, the fear he just tasted still bitter on his tongue.

The man pauses in his response as his eyes drift over the group, “That's asking an awful lot these days.”

“I know.”

The man nods once, his decision made swiftly, “You all submit to a blood test.” He states with no room for discussion, “That's the price of admission.”

“We can do that.” Rick agrees easily.

The man drops his gun and side steps in invitation for the group to approach, “You got stuff to bring in, you do it now. Once this door closes, it stays closed.” The group collectively shakes their heads and moves towards the man. They didn’t need anything- well maybe a good night's sleep.

Following the man, the group squeezes into an elevator. The man swipes a key card and pushes in a code before finally pressing a button to go down. The elevator lurches slightly and begins its descent, “Vi, seal the main entrance. Kill the power up here.” He calls out, the elevator seems to blink its light in response.

The elevator ride is silent and quick, not even thirty seconds, “Rick Grimes.” He says in an invasion to the unnamed man.

The man nods in greeting, “Dr. Edwin Jenner.”

Daryl looks down at the man- his gaze going up and down, the action even more judging with the redneck doing it, “Doctors always go around packing heat like that?”

Jenner looks at Daryl, “There were plenty left lying around. I familiarized myself. But you all look harmless enough.” He states before looking down at Bella and Carl who stand side-by-side almost as though they were trying to squeeze themselves into one being, “Except you two.” He comments in a light voice to the two kids who give a small smile in response, “I'll have to keep my eye on you.” With his comment finished, he stands straight, the small smile adorned on his face wiped away quicker than anyone can blink.

The man’s presence was weird- not because he was alone… well it was exactly because he was alone. Why would only one person come up to meet a group of strangers?

Walking down a rather large cinderblock lined hallway- the walls tightened on a few of the group, Carol asking if they were underground and Jenner merely responds to try and not think of it- less she wants her claustrophobia to really set in.

The end of the hallway opens up to a large circular room with a platform centered in the middle, multiple large computers facing a large black screen. It was just as empty as upstairs- no blood, no bodies. There was no one except Jenner- Vi was a computer.

The group swallowed hard at the sight of an empty CDC- they were hoping for something, anything more than just one person. But there wasn’t.

But even with the hope of some type of cure gone- they had a safe pace. The building is secure, there is food, there is water… they are safe. And with their blood getting drawn- they would be officially welcomed by Jenner.

With all the blood drawn and bandaids stuck on the inner corner of everyone’s arm, Jenner leads everyone into a large cafeteria similar to the large room they first entered and brings out boxes of pasta and sauce- more food than anyone has seen since the outbreak.

The smell of pasta and bread fills the air along with the joyful laughter of everyone. Jenner pulled out bottles of wine and liquor, all the adults filling their cups or, like Daryl, merely claiming their own bottle- there were more than enough for everyone.

Shoveling in food and emptying cups, the conversation runs freely- true comfort and security finally felt across everyone. Sitting between Rick and Lori is Bella and Carl, the pair rapidly consuming their buttered pasta that was stacked high on their plates. Bella and Carl had always had a large appetite- it scared their parents how much the two could consume in one sitting.

They used to have eating competitions when their families would go out together. On the rare Friday night that both Shane and Rick didn’t have to work, they would take Lori and the kids to their local Olive Garden where Bella and Carl would eat at least three baskets of breadsticks… each, a plate of plain lettuce with croutons drench in ranch, cause Lori said they had to have some type of vegetable, and two or three bowls of pasta covered in parmesan cheese. With room for dessert too.

Even now, the pair eats their food like they’ve never eaten before in their life. And with the rationing they’ve been on lately, it’s sort of like they haven’t.

With Lori’s empty cup in his hands, Dale pours in red wine, “You know, in Italy, children have a little bit of wine with dinner,” He states handing the full glass to Loi’s awaiting hand, “And in France.”

Lori laughs as she moves her hand from Carl’s chair to cover the top of his empty cup that needed to be refilled with soda, “Well, when Carl is in Italy or France, he can have some then.”

Rick laughs heartily, “What's it gonna hurt? Come on.” He says to his wife who gives him a side-eye but relents with a smile.

The table cheers as Dale fills Carl’s cup up a finger, “There you are, young lad.” He says handing the cup over to the boy.

The room is silent as they watch Carl take his first sip of alcohol. He takes a rather large mouthful of the red liquid before his face twists in complete disgust, “Eww.” He whines once the liquid is finally down his throat and his slight gagging of the taste passes. The room erupts in laughter- the kind of true, deep from the soul laughter.

With distrustful eyes he goes to push the glass away but it is grabbed swiftly by Bella who wants to try it too, “Sweetheart-” Shane calls out to her- the first to notice her reach but it's no use as she takes a sip too.

More laughter fills the room as the girl merely shrugged and hands the cup and its remaining liquid to Lori who pours it into her own- not letting the precious liquid go to waste, “That's my boy.” She says with a soft touch to Carl’s hair.

“Yuck! That tastes nasty.” Carl whines as he accepts the refilled cup of soda from Dale to wash the spiteful taste of alcohol from his tongue.

Shane gives a weak laugh- the man sits at the other end of the table in a mood. The air around him still even with his joking comment, “Well, just stick to sour pop there, bud.”

“Not you, Glenn.” Daryl cuts in next to Glenn’s blush stained ear. The young man’s face is coloring red from the warmth of the alcohol coursing through his veins.

Picking his head up, Glenn gives a confused laugh, “What?”

“Keep drinking, little man. I want to see how red your face can get.” Glenn merely gives a half-hearted fake laugh.

It has been a long time since any of the adults have had a taste of alcohol, at least two months since the world went to shit. And the alcohol was acting faster than any of them remembered.

With more laughter filling the air, the tinking of silverware on glass draws everyone’s eyes to Rick, “It seems to me we haven't thanked our host properly.” Rick raises his glass to Jenner who sits, much like Shane, secluded in his own still air.

“He is more than just our host.” T-Dog responds by putting his glass up. The group cheers, hoots, and hollers to the man who saved them from certain death. They could never express their gratefulness to the man.

The group cheers and refills glasses moving to continue their conversation but the joyous occasion is stilled with Shane’s voice, “So when are you gonna tell us what the hell happened here, doc?” The noise in the room goes comically still, “All the... the other doctors that were supposed to be figuring out what happened… where are they?” Everyone looks at Shane with disbelief written across their faces- why couldn’t they just have a minute of peace.

Tisking quietly Rick responds with his eyes looking sharp, “We're celebrating, Shane. Don't need to do this now.”

Shane laughs, falsely raising his hands in defense, “Whoa, wait a second. This is why we're here, right? This was your move…” The table settles into silence, “Supposed to find all the answers. Instead we… we found him.” The words are spit almost in accusation, “Found one man. Why?”

The table is silent in response to Shane’s words, “Daddy…” Bella whispers across the table almost begging her dad to just drop it.

But he doesn’t. Shane merely turns his eyes to Jenner waiting for the man to speak- it was as though Shane didn’t trust the man even after he saved all of them.

Jenner moistens his lips weakly and wiggles in his seat, “When things got bad, a lot of people just left… went off to be with their families.” Everyone listens intently as Jenner speaks- his voice growing hard, void of emotion, “And when things got worse, when the military cordon got overrun, the rest bolted.”

“Every last one?” Carol asks softly.

“No, many couldn't face walking out the door.” The man looks straight out into the room- memories replaying behind his eyes, “They... opted out. There was a rash of suicides. That was a bad time.” His words drift off weakly.

“You didn't leave.” Andrea states. Her body leans forward and inward- making herself smaller but interested in what Jenner was saying; “Why?”

“I just kept working. Hoping to do some good.”

The room is silent in sadness- what little happiness that was growing dissipated swiftly. Glenn is the first to break the silence as he stands straight claiming a bottle off the table, “Dude, you are such a buzzkill, man.”

Everyone finishes their food in silence. And with the food gone- the bottles are grabbed and everyone follows Jenner through the hallways.

Jenner shows the group to a cluster of staff lounges- pointing and directing everyone to their own rooms to rest and where they could find clothes and blankets if they desired more. All ending with asking the group to go easy on the hot water when they shower.

Hot water? Hot water?! No one has fully bathed in two months and now- they have hot water?! Giggling like children, the group runs off towards the communal showers to strip themselves of their clothes and the dirt that sticks to them like a second skin.

Carol leads Sophia, Bella and Carl to a small rec room so they could wait for the excited adults to finish their showers. The kids find a stack of board games which they pull at excitedly- they easily fall into the games laughing as one gets ahead of the others.

The sound of running water in the pipes can be heard from the walls. And within half an hour the water stops running and the laughter of all the adults drifts into the halls as they come out in fresh clothes with wet dripping hair.

After winning two games of Shoots ‘n Ladders Bella had left to claim a room and build a place to sleep for herself and dad. Cushions and pillows are arranged in a long strip underneath the couch's feet- there once was a time that Bella wasn’t concerned about sleeping alone but now… she wasn’t gonna sleep without her dad by her side.

Back from his shower, Shane watches Bella finish off the blankets on their makeshift beds- they’ll have to find a nicer way to sleep another day. Shane pulls out a set of fresh PJs for his little girl as she works in silence, “Princess, come over here for a second.”

Bella looks over her shoulder as she folds the edge of the blanket that will soon be undone, “Almost done, daddy.”

Shane rolls his eyes at Bella’s focus, “Don’t worry ‘bout that. Come here.” Shane had sat himself in a chair that hadn’t been stripped of its cushions and now motions for Bella to come over.

Concern draws over Bella’s young face- she hopes up quickly moving to stand between her dad’s legs, “What’s wrong?” Her blue eyes trace over her dad looking for a source of concern.

But Shane pulls Bella from her useless search with a gentle touch to her chin. Shane smiles softly down to his daughter, his eyes dry and red from exhaustion and alcohol, “We need to talk.” His voice is strained with his words- this was something he never thought he’d have to do, “About the other night.”

Bella’s face drops swiftly. She knew her dad would be mad- he always said that she couldn’t touch his gun or any gun without his permission. And now she was in trouble and her dad is mad… but she was just trying to protect Mr. Grimes. That can’t be that bad right? He can’t be that mad at her for that, right? “I’m sorry, daddy.” She speaks fast- her dad can’t be mad at her. ‘I know you told me to never take your gun without you knowing but-” She couldn’t handle it if her dad was mad at her.

Shane’s eyes widen quickly at the speed Bella forces out her words and her face twists in agony. He gives her a soft smile and grabs at her face, cradling it softly in his hands, “Slow down, baby girl. That’s not the problem. In fact-” He leans in close as Bella’s eyes focus fully, “I am so proud of you.” His words force a calm over Bella and tears to weld in her eyes. “You were scared- hell I was scared- but you saved Rick. You remembered what I taught you.” His voice is proud- the opposite of what Bella was expecting to hear. “You’re not in trouble, Bella. I just… I wanna make sure- I want to make sure you’re okay?” Bella gives her dad a smile in return. Her small hands touch her dad’s stubbly cheeks mirroring his own hands on her smooth cheeks.

“It was just a walker, daddy.” She states simply- she didn’t care about the walker only that her daddy wasn’t mad at her.

Shane nods tightly, killing a walker- killing anything- wasn’t something his little girl should have to deal with, “I know- I know…” Pulling the trigger is difficult- no matter if the person on the other end was trying to kill you or not, “But it was a person.”

“Once. It’s not anymore.” The young girl’s words are so simply said. It’s as though she speaks of killing a spider in her room.

Shane looks over his daughter’s face. She was his whole world- anything and everything Shane did or does is to protect her… but sometimes he feels like she doesn’t need him- like she’s lived a thousand lives and she doesn’t need him. How could his little girl not need her dad? “You’ll always tell me the truth?”

Bella smiles and grasps at Shane’s neck pulling him into a tight hug, “I’d never lie to you, daddy.” She speaks gently into the crook of his neck.

Shane’s hands pet Bella's messy braids, “I know you wouldn’t, my sweet girl.” A kiss is placed atop her head, “If you need to talk, you come straight to me.”

Pulling back Bella raises her pinkie between the two of them, “Same for you, daddy.”

Shane grabs his girl’s pinkie with his own, “Pinkie promise.” He swears to her and with everything in his body- he means it.

Once cleaned and changed, Bella had drifted down the halls to find Jacqui after she looked into her room to see her dad sitting down with a bottle in his hand, relaxing- she wanted her hair braided and she hadn’t figured out the pattern yet. But she couldn’t find Jacqui either, she must have gone to bed.

Shrugging away the hope of getting her hair braided she continues down the stone cold silent hallways. The lights are a dim yellow that bleeds into the darkness of the main room. Walking silently, Bella approaches the back of Jenner who sits at the only active computer. He smells silently of the sour alcohol she had tasted at dinner, Hello, Dr. Jenner.”

The man spins fast in his chair not hearing the young girl, “Hello.”

Bella looks over the man at the lines of unknown data on the screen, “Is that the blood?” The young girl’s eyes hold a gleam of interest.

Jenner nods stiffly, “Yep, all clean.” He leans away from the young girl’s presence- as though it is poisonous.

“What’s that?” She points to the screen.

Jenner looks at the screen and enlarges the image the girl was pointing to, “It is a blood panel so… it shows if there’s any infection and your blood type-” He explains watching her look over the screen, “You have O-positive blood. Your dad is B-positive.” He clicks through from one screen to the next.

“O- positive can be given to anyone, right? My teacher Mrs. Mueller was teaching us some stuff before… everything.” They had been learning Punnett squares but the lesson was cut short when parents stormed the school and dragged their children away.

“O-negative is universal, can be used by anyone. O-positive can only be given to other positive blood types.”

Bella smiles at Jenner before looking closer to the screen as though she could learn more, “Hmm… that’s cool.”

“It’s very cool.” He speaks with a laugh, “Do you like stuff like this?”

The young girl nods pulling away from the man, “It's interesting- my daddy would take me to the library and let me pick out any book I wanted. Carl would make fun of me for reading the ‘educational books’.” Jenner laughs at Bella’s words- it was rare for a child so young to be so interested in something that they would pick a book to learn more about it.

“It’s important to read.”

“Mrs. Grimes says that all the time.”

Jenner sighs gently, the girl needed her sleep and talking about blood wasn’t something she needed before bed, “Well, there’s plenty of ‘educational books’ for you to read here. I assume you’ve already started looking through them?” His words are meant to deter her back to her father but her eyes merely continue looking around at the new world around her.

“Yes, Dr. Jenner.” Her eyes land on a picture frame with a woman smiling brightly with her arms wrapped around Jenner, “Is that your wife?” The man quickly and almost violently pushes the frame down to hide the face of the woman, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-”

“No, no. It’s alright. I just- I lost her recently.”

Bella nods gently- everyone has lost someone, “I’m sorry for your loss.” The man dips his head gently in thanks but before either of them can continue Rick approaches the pair stumbling into railings and sloshing alcohol to the ground, “Good night, Dr. Jenner.” The girl calls as she walks away back to her dad. Jenner’s soft words in return followed behind her.

The young girl moves swiftly back to her room, the path already ingrained in her head. Pushing open the door to the dim darkness of the room Bella looks down to Shane who now laid passed out on his stomach- the cushions she had arranged into a nice mattress now a mess, and the bottle of alcohol empty. It’s with a gentle sigh that she closes the door and grabs the discarded blanket.

Fluttering the blanket over her dad, Bella gets the large man as comfortable as she can. She tries to roll him fully to his side but he was double the size of her, made up of pure dead weight muscle. Partially on his side, Bella kisses her dad’s motionless cheek before standing to curl up on the couch, “Good night, daddy. I love you.”

Chapter Text

The morning came by way of the lights turning onto their bright eye straining color. If they weren’t underground in a secure building, Bella would’ve thought a handful of walkers had slithered their way inside. Glenn seemed to be the worst of the adults, stumbling and sluggish as he walked into the cafeteria where many others already sat and T-Dog was cooking up breakfast for the group.

Skipping up to the seat beside Carl, Bella drops herself next to her friend just as T-Dog places a plate of eggs, toast, and some previously frozen bacon in front of her and Carl to share.

With a quick hand Carl grabs at a piece of bacon and digs into it, “Hey, Bee.” He says in a way of greeting while chewing his bacon.

“Good morning, Carl… Mrs. Grimes.” Bella says in turn.

Lori smiles at Bella, her gaze soft and still sleepy from the night, “Morning, sweetie. Did you sleep well?” Her hands grip snugly at a mug of coffee- the first in a long time.

“Yes, Mrs. Grimes.” 

Carl scoffs at the girl, “Doesn’t look like it.” He responds while he tears apart a piece of toast that had been layered with jelly. Bella did not look well rested like others in the group- her normally bright green eyes were darkened with bags forming underneath and her skin was paler than normal.

Bella gives mock laughs at Carl while punching him in the arm before grabbing at some food before Carl finished it all. “I take it your daddy is as bad as mine.” The pair gazes at each other as Glenn groans in pain, “They are going to be very hungover.” Bella laughs as she speaks louder than necessary, all for Glenn to groan once more. 

T-Dog comes behind Glenn dropping a spoon full of scrambled eggs onto his plate, “They won’t be the only ones.” Glenn grips at his head and pulls away from the eggs that smelled too much like eggs- everyone was poking at the headache he had.

Bella and Carl couldn’t see the appeal of alcohol- especially now… adults always drank it during dinner and it seemed to just cause a bad night of sleep and a morning headache- and it tasted bad. 

The group silenced as they ate their food, Bella and Carl fighting for a moment over the last piece of bacon- Carl traded for the last bacon strip with a piece of perfectly toasted bread which Bella savored with a thick spread of butter. Who didn’t love bread and butter?

Footsteps alert the group of an approaching person which is Rick dragging his body to the seat on the other side of his wife. “Morning.” Rick drops himself into the chair as Lori fills a cup to the top with cold water.

“Are you hungover?” Rick turns his head to his son, “Bella said you'd be.” He explains with a slight smile.

Rick laughs painfully- his eyes were squinting towards the pair. The fluorescent yellow lights were headache inducing even without the hangover, “Bella… is right.”

“Bella is usually right.”

Carl’s eyes roll so hard for a moment all Bella sees is the whites, “If that’s what you want to believe.” He sasses to the girl causing Bella to stick her tongue out in return. The pair push at each other with their shoulders but are quickly scolded with a look from Lori.

The pair relent and Bella reaches over for one of the bottles of pain killers that were laid out by Jenner to pass over to Rick.

“Where'd all this come from?” Rick asks as he tries and fails at opening the bottle- the child safety measure is too difficult for the man. 

Lori makes quick work of it, “Jenner. He thought we could use it.” Lori looks to Glenn as he groans once more,  “Some of us, at least.” The smile is heard in her voice.

“Don't everrrr- ever- ever… let me drink again.” Glenn whines comically.

Everyone smiles as another pair of footsteps approach. With a small turn of their heads, everyone sees Shane make his way into the cafeteria, “Hey. Feel as bad as I do?” Rick asks.

“Worse.”

Shane’s response is short as he moves past everyone with a gentle pat to his little girl’s hair. He grabs a plate to begin piling breakfast onto. But he is stopped short at T-Dog’s concerned gaze,  “The hell happened to you? Your neck?”

Shane stills momentarily- too quick for most to notice, “I must have done it in my sleep.” He doesn’t sound confident in his words.

“Never seen you do that before.”

“Me neither. Not like me at all.” Shane speaks, eyes drifting from the table to glance at Lori before he continues filling his plate.

Rick, being the man he is, goes to question Shane further- how was he not supposed to make sure his brother was okay? But he is cut off by Bella’s voice, “It was my fault, daddy.” Everyone’s head turns towards Bella- confusion painted on their faces. The girl loved her dad, why would she hurt him? “I tried fixing your pillow last night… it didn’t really work.” Bella's words are almost strangled as though she thought she would be yelled at- even though her father never once truly raised his voice to her.

A tight pained smile forms over Shane’s face, eyes going glassy for a second as though he was reliving a memory. The room was waiting for Shane's response, “That’s alright, Princess.” He plants a kiss on her head and drops down next to her with his plate of food. Bella smiles before grabbing a slice of toast and piece of bacon off his plate- handing the protein to Carl faster than Shane can stop her.

The group drops back into conversation and their meal now that the whole group was together once more. The air was light- just like the night before during dinner, well… the beginning of dinner. 

Shane questions how his daughter slept- and did not believe when she said it was fine. The exhaustion was evident on the girl’s face and she looked a mess- her washed hair was tied back soaking wet the night before. Curly hair tied back soaking wet to sleep on? A very bad combination. Shane will have to fix it later- perhaps Jacqui could tell Bella how to do some braids, he couldn’t understand why she hadn’t figured it out herself yet.

The girl was a quick learner and stubborn like her father- but braiding hair was something she couldn’t figure out.

The conversation flows, talking about how everyone was and what they were gonna do today. And with the entrance of Jenner, all the talking stops, “Doctor, I don't mean to slam you with questions first thing…” Dale starts, his fork now forgotten on his plate.

“But you will anyway.” Jenner finishes as he sips at lukewarm coffee- exhaustion written on his face.

Andrea perks up, dropping her fork to her plate, “We didn't come here for the eggs.”

Jenner is silent for a mere moment, his mug of coffee is placed on the table and he motions for everyone to follow him. They wanted to know about the outbreak- he would tell them.

Everyone gathers into the large main room they first entered not even 12 hours ago. The air was still and tense as they watched Jenner walk around the computers with a sigh, “Vi, give me a playback of TS-19.” His words echo into the room, bouncing against the cement walls.

“Playback of TS-19.” Come the robotic female voice.

Jenner sighs once more staring up to the large screen in the room. The screen was so large it almost seemed like a stadium Jumbotron, “Few people ever got a chance to see this.” His words are emotional- an emotion that can’t be placed, “Very few.” He whispers.

The screen goes from loading to the x-ray of a brain and upper torso- multiple numbers and readings lining the edge of the screen. The body lays on its back- the x-ray coming from the side.“Is that a brain?” Carl questions quickly- it was so defined on the video, no one in the group had ever seen anything like it.

Jenner smiles brightly for a moment, “An extraordinary one.” But the smile fades painfully, “Not that it matters in the end.” Carl’s face drops from his place next to Lori. Jenner looks at the group as they move their interested gaze from the screen to him and back, “Take us in for E.I.V.”

“Enhanced internal view.”

The screen zones in focusing on the brain and upper spine of the person that lays on the table, “What are those lights?” Carol questions, lights danced around in the brain of the person- bright white and blue lights sparking and twinkling in the head. 

It was beautiful. The lights that shone in the head- but no one understands what they are. Was that normal? What was it?

“It's a person's life…” Jenner gazes almost… lovingly towards the screen, “Experiences, memories. It's everything.” His gaze turns towards the group, “Somewhere in all that organic wiring, all those ripples of light, is you… the thing that makes you unique… and human.”

The group stares at Jenner like he was crazy- what the hell did all that mean?

“You don't make sense, ever?” Daryl speaks taking a few steps around a computer so he could lean back against it.

“Sign-apses.” Calls Bella.

A laugh escapes Jenner, “Very close- synapses.” He corrects. Bella repeats it to the man causing a small smile to break across his face. The girl had been reading the books littered in the underground bunker. “Synapses, electric impulses in the brain that carry all the messages.” He crafts his words carefully- he wanted them to understand but didn’t want to confuse them with too many unknown words, “They determine everything a person says, does or thinks from the moment of birth… to the moment of death.”

“Death?” Rick questions, “That's what this is, a vigil?”

“Yes.” The doctor says in response, “Or rather the playback of the vigil.”

Andrea swallows thickly from the back of the group- loud enough for everyone to hear, “This person died? Who?” Her voice is laced with emotion- her own memories drifting back to Andrea who died not even four whole days ago… the pain still so fresh.

“Test subject 19. Someone who was bitten and infected…” The doctor’s voice matches the emotion in Andrea’s- he knew this person. They were a friend, a coworker- they were someone he cared about, “And volunteered to have us record the process.” The group stays silent, “Vi, scan forward to the first event.”

“Scanning to the first event.”

The screen stills and loads before changing to a new time stamp. Everyone watches as the bright lights that twinkle in the brain slowly fade out as a deep red starts to bleed through, “What is that?” Carol voices out.

“It invades the brain like meningitis.” They watch the lights dim and go dark- no light or life in the brain… only the small pieces of deep from staining the base of the brain. “The adrenal glands hemorrhage, the brain goes into shutdown, then the major organs… then death. Everything you ever were or ever will be… gone.”

Sophia's small voice questions, “Is that what happened to Jim?”

Carol swallows hard- another death that was still fresh, “Yes.”

Jenner waits as the group absorbs the new information- it couldn’t be easy. It wasn’t for him. “She lost somebody two days ago. Her sister.” Lori explains when Jenner’s gaze focuses on Andrea. The woman has her mouth covered and head bowed down.

The nod of understanding comes from Jenner, “I lost somebody too. I know how devastating it is.” Andrea meets his eyes in a sense of gratefulness- no one could bring Amy back… but to know that someone understands your pain… It can lessen the pain in someone’s chest. “Scan to the second event.”

“Scanning to the second event.”

The screen changes once more, the brain still dark on the screen, “The resurrection times vary wildly.” Jenner explains as the deep red that lays in the brain drifts towards the neck and what seems to be the main stem of the brain. “We had reports of it happening in as little as three minutes. The longest we heard of was eight hours.” The dark red lightens little as it seems to replace a small bit of the once pretty white lights. “In the case of this patient, it was two hours, one minute… seven seconds.”

The back half of the brain lights up in a deep red. The body slowly begins to move in the restraints it was likely in. “It restarts the brain?” Lori's question is perplexed as she looks at the screen.

“No, just the brain stem. Basically, it gets them up and moving.” 

“But they're not alive?” Rick shoots back to the man.

Jenner shrugs his shoulders, “You tell me.” It was obvious that Jenner believed they were dead- just a mere flesh suit being controlled by something.

Rick walks forward, “It's nothing like before. Most of that brain is dark.”

“Dark, lifeless, dead. The frontal lobe, the neocortex, the human part... That doesn't come back… the you part.” He speaks to the group, “Just a shell driven by mindless instinct.” His stance is sad as he speaks. This… thing, it takes every piece of who you are; your life and your body.

The room is draped in dread and sadness as they stare at the screen- the, now, walker struggled on whatever they laid on. But the struggle only lasted thirty seconds before a path formed in the walker's brain in a blink of an eye, “God! What was that?” Carol cries.

“He shot his patient in the head.” Andrea speaks, “Didn't you?”

“Vi, power down the main screen and the workstations.” Jenner says in response to the women.

“Powering down the main screen and workstations.”

Andrea moves forward while everyone stands numbly confused, “You have no idea what it is, do you?”

Jenner shrugs- how was he supposed to know? There was only him… did they expect him to figure it out all by himself. “It could be microbial, viral, parasitic, fungal…”

“Or the wrath of God?” Jacqui adds to the list.

“There is that.”

“Somebody must know something. Somebody… Somewhere.” Andrea cries- the air became even stiller if it was even possible. 

“There are others, right? Other facilities?”

Jenner shrugs again- he truly knew nothing, “There may be some. People like me.”

“But you don't know?” Rick questions in a strained voice, “How can you not know?”

“Everything went down.” The doctor's voice is strained in a deep pain, “Communications, directives... all of it. I've been in the dark for almost a month.”

“So it's not just here.” Andrea speaks mostly to herself- the realization settling onto her and everyone else, “There's nothing left anywhere? Nothing? That's what you're really saying,- right?”

 “Man, I'm gonna get shit-faced drunk again.” Daryl calls as he paces the room.

There was no explanation to anything- the virus, or whatever it was, how to survive… if they could survive. This wasn’t something that would be fought easily- even though they survived, what truly is stopping them from getting bit or eaten alive just to turn into one of the dead? Forced to die painfully.

How can any of them believe there’s any hope when the one person that has a single clue about this disaster, doesn’t know anything?

The silence of the room becomes overwhelming- it causes uncomfortable tingling under everyone’s skin. Too much has happened… too much learned. The shred of hope they once felt was fading swiftly in front of their eyes… and there was nothing they could do.

“Dr. Jenner, I know this has been taxing for you and I hate to ask one more question, but…” Dale starts breaking the silence of the room. “That clock... It's counting down. What happens at zero?” He references the rather large red digital clock that is slowly counting down, its timer at 1:45:36, and ticking away every second. How did no one else notice or question it before now?

Jenner pauses looking at the clock, “The basement generators…” He breaks his sentence as though he was thinking, “They run out of fuel.”

“And then?” Rick’s eye stares deeply at the man. Jenner, uncomfortable with the gaze, merely drops his own and leaves- walking away from the group. “Vi, what happens when the power runs out?” He speaks out to the computer Jenner always calls upon- if he wasn’t going to answer, the computer will.

“When the power runs out, facility-wide decontamination will occur.”

The group shares confused gazes. Decontamination? Is the building going to spray bleach out of the sprinkler system? “Decontamination... What does that mean?” Glenn calls out to the group in hopes someone besides Jenner, who wasn’t saying anything, knew what was going on.

The group merely stands in silence. The gazes shared around the group were filled with concern. Bella, holding tightly to her father’s arm, looks up towards the ceiling, “Vi, what does facility-wide decontamination mean?” She calls out, Vi knows what ‘decontamination’ means so why not ask.

“Vi manual turn off!” Comes from Jenner’s mouth faster than the computer voice can respond to the young girl. If people were concerned before they are terrified now.

“Manual turn off ready.”

Everyone stares at the man in disbelief as he hits a button, enters a long number code, and leaves the room. All the while everyone is screaming after him about what the hell was happening. Why wouldn’t he let the computer answer Bella? What was Jenner hiding? 

It couldn’t be that bad- it’s like Jenner said, ‘the basement generators run out of fuel’. They’ll probably just lose power and such, nothing too bad… right?

With the confusion still present, Rick takes Shane, Glenn, Daryl, and T-Dog towards a flight of stairs in hopes of finding the generators. They’ll figure out the problem themselves and fix it themselves if Jenner doesn’t want to. Rick sends everyone else back to their rooms to get dressed and organize their things. If Jenner was going to act like this… then Rick didn’t really want to stay. The situation didn’t feel quite right.

The group of men’s footsteps echo hard on the steel stairwell as they follow the signs down to the basement generator room, “I don't like the way Jenner clammed up and shutting off the computer before it could answer Bella’s question.” Shane spits out as they enter the room swiftly, “The way he just wandered off like that.”

T-Dog scoffs from the back of the line, “What's wrong with him?” The group circles at the center of the basement,  “Seriously, man, is he nuts? Medicated? What?”

Rick looks around before pointing T-Dog and Glenn in one direction and Daryl in another, “In there. Check that way.” The men move swiftly to search the fuel tanks that are littered around.

Shane and Rick find the last generator that runs with a green light and humming noise rather quickly among the dead ones. Two tanks are attached to the complicated machine with tubes. “It's empty,” Shane calls as he pushes at one of the tanks before pushing at the second that moves only a hair with Shane’s force- the tank is full.

Rick and Shane share a look as the lights go dark- the fluorescent yellow turning to a dim emergency red. “Emergency lighting on.” Vi calls out in the room- it seems she was turned back on.

“What the hell is this?” Daryl calls out as he comes up with Glenn and T-Dog by his side.

“You guys kill the lights?”

“Nah, it just went out.” Shane responds to T-Dog as he stares at the tank.

Rick looks towards the men hoping for some good news, “Anything?”

T-Dog huffs a painfully amused laugh, “Yeah, a lot of dead generators and more empty fuel drums than I can count.”

“It can't be down to just that one.” Shane says mostly to himself. This was not good news.

Living in a basement with no lights was out of the question. It’s time for them to leave- they overstayed their welcome by the doctor. The decision is agreed upon easily with a simple look between the men.

Legs moving quickly, they race to the main room, their shoes banging aggressively against the ground. The approach of the main room is easy with the yellow lights still shining inside to light their way and littered with the multiple questioning voices coming from within.

“What's going on?” Rick shouts over everyone’s voices. His feet move fast to the doctor, who walks numbly in the room, “Why is everything turned off?”

“Energy use is being prioritized.” His words are simple and… calm in the face of everyone’s confusion and anger. What the hell is going on?!

“Air isn't a priority? And lights?” Dale questions.

Jenner shrugs as he moves to a computer- his favorite it seems. “It's not up to me. Zone 5 is shutting itself down.”

Shane’s approach to the man happens within the blink of an eye, “Hey! Hey, what the hell does that mean?” Jenner merely turns away from him, “Hey man, I'm talking to you!” He shouts, grabbing roughly at the man’s shoulder. How dare he turn his back on any of them. They just wanted to know what was going on- they weren’t children that needed to be kept in the dark.

Rick pulls Shane away from the man- he could see the anger taking over his brother’s eyes. “What do you mean it's shutting itself down?” Daryl asks from the edge of the computers. “How can a building do anything?”

“You'd be surprised.”

Rick pushes his friend away and walks up to the doctor- arms spread in a placating motion, “Jenner, what's happening?” His voice is soft yet firm- he was going to get an answer one way or another.

“The system is dropping all the nonessential uses of power.” Jenner explains looking at the man, “It's designed to keep the computers running to the last possible second. That started as we approached the half-hour mark.” He points to the large clock on the wall that still ticks away every second, “Right on schedule.” He walks around the computers once more to get a better look at Andrea. “It was the French.”

“What?”

“They were the last ones to hold out as far as I know.” His voice drips in controlled agony once more- how the man can control himself as he speaks all his painful experiences is lost on the group. “While our people were bolting out the doors and committing suicide in the hallways, they stayed in the labs till the end… They thought they were close to a solution.” 

“What happened?”

Jenner looks around the large room as the lights within the hall change to the emergency red and the group finally gathers together on the main platform. “The same thing that's happening here.” A mere pause. “No power grid. Ran out of juice.” The doctor huffs a laugh, “The world runs on fossil fuel. I mean, how stupid is that?” 

“Let me tell you…”

Rick stops Shane before the man can continue his approach or words, “To hell with it, Shane. I don't even care. Lori, grab our things. Everybody, get your stuff. We're getting out of here now!” He commands, sending everyone into motion.

“30 minutes to decontamination.”

The room drops into a dim red, the multiple lights of the room turning off permanently. “Doc, what's going on here?” Daryl shouts to the man.

Shane grabs the redneck’s shoulder in a sign to drop it- Jenner wasn’t going to say anything. “Everybody, y'all heard Rick. Get your stuff and let's go!” He picks Bella up into his arms moving to lead everyone back to the rooms to gather their things quickly.  “Go now! Go! Let's go.”

The group begins their move as the screeching of metal-on-metal sounds in the room. Whipping their heads in the direction of the spine shuddering noise, the hallway that leads to the surface is cut off by a wall of steel. Glenn is the closest to the wall and screams to the group, “Did he just lock us in?! He just locked us in!” He proclaims.

Jenner doesn’t even turn his head to the group, “We've hit the 30-minute window. I am recording.”

Rick approaches Jenner swiftly, “Hey, Jenner, open that door now!”

“There's no point. Everything topside is locked down. The emergency exits are sealed.”

Daryl looks down at the doctor, “Well, open the damn things!” He shouts- his crossbow tensing in his grip. Everyone was losing their patience. What the hell did Jenner plan to do?

He can’t keep them here- locked away underground.

Jenner shakes his head, “That's not something I control. The computers do. I told you once that front door closed, it wouldn't open again. You heard me say that.” He spits at Rick. He stands and looks at the group, their faces filled with fear and confusion, before settling on the leader, “It's better this way.”

“What is? What happens in 28 minutes?!” Jenner doesn't say anything- he just stares, “What happens in 28 minutes?!”

“You know what this place is?!” Jenner snaps- his voice spreads angrily across the room stilling everyone, “We protected the public from very nasty stuff! Weaponized smallpox! Ebola strains that could wipe out half the country! Stuff you don't want getting out! Ever!” His scream echoes against the walls. Jenner takes a deep breath- the breath calming what little anger and exhaustion it can.  “In the event of a catastrophic power failure... in a terrorist attack, for example… H.I.T.s are deployed to prevent any organisms from getting out.” He explains.

“H.I.T.s?”

Jenner sighs softly, “Vi, define H.I.T.s.”

“H.I.T.s...high-impulse thermobaric fuel-air explosives consists of a two-stage aerosol ignition that produces a blast wave of significantly greater power and duration than any other known explosive except nuclear. The vacuum-pressure effect ignites the oxygen between 5,000 degrees and 6,000 degrees. It is used when the greatest loss of life and damage to structures is desired.”

Death. That's what it is. The group came to the CDC to find safety… a lifeline and now- now they are going to die after everything. After all the death and pain and exhaustion…

“It sets the air on fire.” Jenner whispers in the quiet air, “No pain. An end to sorrow, grief… regret. Everything.” Tears fall silently down people’s cheeks- hands grabbed and embraces shared with the new reality. They're going to die… and they have no choice. 

Daryl shakes his head in disbelief before moving swiftly to a case of emergency axes he spotted when he first arrived. His crossbow shatters the glass covering, the sound echoing in the room mingling with the barley contained cries and tears. He grips one tight and tosses another to T-Dog, together they begin swinging at the steel wall that blocks their escape. The dings and bangs are sounding out.

“You should've left well enough alone. It would've been so much easier.”

“Easier for who?” Lori cries from her spot on the ground where she tightly embraces a terrified Carl. Carol and Sophia sat next to them in the same state.

“All of you. You know what's out there… a short, brutal life and an agonizing death.” The man must truly be insane… he can’t believe this is the right thing- killing them- killing children.  But he looks gently over to Andrea who is bent over a computer, “Your... your sister... what was her name?”

Her head moved gently to look at the man, “Amy.”

Jenner smiles softly, “Amy. You know what this does. You've seen it.” His gaze turns to Rick. “Is that really what you want for your wife and son?” Death was always painful but now… it was agony. There’s such little hope that any of them will grow old like they once believed- who would want that for their family? A painful brutal life, full of fear?

Rick takes a single step to the man, “I don't. Want. This.” He grinds out.

By the steel wall, the dings of steel-on-steel stops, “Can't make a dent!” Shane huffs out in a scream- his form bent over to couch its breath.

“Those doors are designed to withstand a rocket launcher.” Jenner states simply.

The turn of Daryl is quicker than anyone can register- if there weren’t computer stands and bodies in the way he wouldn’t have been stopped, “Well, your head ain't!” He screams, his ax raised to the doctor's head, like he raised it to Jim’s not long ago.

But his approach was stopped before he truly sealed their fate.

As Rick, Shane, Glenn and T-Dog try to calm the fuming redneck, Jenner sits back in his chair. “You do want this.” The sentence is given to Rick, the man turns to look at the doctor, “Last night you said you knew it was just a matter of time before everybody you loved was dead.”

The tense air shifted in disbelief, “What?” Shane calls looking at the man. Lori and Carl look up to Rick, “What? You really said that? After all your big talk?”

“I had to keep hope alive, didn't I?”

“There is no hope.” Jenner states. “There never was.”

Rick turns on the man. How could he say that in front of his wife? His son? The most important people to him- Jenenr just said Rick has no hope? After everything! “There's always hope.” Rick proclaims to the doctor, “Maybe it won't be you, maybe not here, but somebody somewhere…”

“What part of ‘everything is gone’ do you not understand?” Andrea spits to Rick- the woman had given up and it was inevitable. 

“This is what takes us down. This is our extinction event.”

Carol sniffs loudly- “This isn't right. You can't just keep us here.” She cries as she pulls her daughter’s head closer to her heart. As though the love for her child would save her.

Jenner looks to the crying woman and the children on the ground, “One tiny moment... a millisecond. No pain.” He tries in comfort.

“My daughter doesn't deserve to die like this!”

Jenner continues his gaze, “Wouldn't it be kinder, more compassionate to just hold your loved ones and wait for the clock to run down?” What kind of question is that? There was still hope- maybe if there wasn’t it would be different- but there is.

Carol doesn’t respond to the man- she merely dips her head into Sophia’s hair and cries.

With all the tears and the banging that had started once more, Bella stands to the side. Her father was trying to break down the door- he couldn’t hold her… so she just stood.

Numb and to the side she listened with silent tears. She listens to the words and the cries- listens to the begging. She didn’t understand. Why would Jenner kill them? He wasn’t the killing type- he couldn't be. 

He was a man in pain, a grieving man. He wouldn’t want to die with the guilt of forcing death onto people… onto children. He was a doctor- doctors save people. That’s what her daddy always told her.

 “...Do you think your wife would do this?” Bella asks into the room- the words escaping her mouth without her permission. Jenner whips his head to the little girl. “I don’t think she would.”

Jenner drops his head. “You don’t know what my wife would’ve wanted- you're just a child.”

Bella walks close to the man looking him in the eyes with tears falling from hers. Rick comes over to the girl, a buffer of sorts between her and the doctor. “She let herself turn.” The words cause disbelief to cross Jenner face. Tears begin to weld in his eyes. He never said his wife turned. “She let herself suffer and change into a monster so you could better understand what was going on-” 

“And it was for nothing…”

The group looks between the pair. How did Bella know that T.S. 19 was his wife? When did she learn he even had a wife? “Test subject 19 was your wife?” Andrea asks, confused.

Jenner blinks hard, a tear escaping. “She begged me to keep going as long as I could. How could I say no? She was dying.” He wipes roughly at his eyes, chest rising and falling with hard breaths. “It should've been me on that table. I wouldn't have mattered to anybody.” The doctor stands roughly to look at the dark main screen as though the images were still playing. “She was a loss to the world. Hell, she ran this place. I just worked here. In our field, she was an Einstein. Me?” His face turns to the group, “I'm just... Edwin Jenner. She could've done something about this. Not me.”

Rick touches Bella’s shoulder lightly, “Your wife died so others could have a chance to live. A choice.” He proclaims to the man- he just needed a chance, “Let us choose to live.”

“There is no life out there!” Jenner shouts.

“Maybe not for you!” Bella screams back to the man from behind Rick- the older man looking down at the girl- everyone looks at the girl. She had never spoken so angrily before… She is terrified. “And maybe you don’t want to find one out there, but we do!” The young girl cries as Carl’s small hand reaches out for her ankle- an anchor, a message that her friend was with her, “I wanna live… please, I don’t wanna die.” She cries out as her knees go weak and Carl grabs her. The young boy pulls his friend into a tight embrace as the numbness in the girl's chest starts to burn in hot tears.

The young girl’s tears cause the knife in everyone’s chest to twist more. 

The cries sound out around the room and Jenner merely looks down to the girl, “You’ll die either way.” He says simply… numbly.

Everyone dies… and Shane was going to kill Jenner himself. Rick yells at the man to stop but it does nothing to stop the anger the man had become.

How dare he speak to his daughter like that. Make his daughter cry like that! He wants to kill anyone else, go ahead, but his daughter- his family- they were off limits. It wasn’t going to happen.

“Open that door or I'm gonna blow your head off. Do you hear me?!” Shane screams as he presses the shot gun to the doctor's head.

Rick doesn’t lay a hand on the red-hot man but stands by his side, “Brother, brother, this is not the way you do this. We will never get out of here.” He speaks but it only makes Shane press the barrel deeper. “He dies, we all…” Shane starts to huff, “...We all die! Shane!” Shane roars to the doctor as he turns the barrel to the computer screens next to the man. Three shots ringing out and destroying the technology that will soon be destroyed anyways. Shane turns the barrel back to the doctor, but it is pulled roughly to his grasp and the mass of muscle that is Shane Walsh is knocked to the ground. “Are you done now?” Rick raises the butt of the weapon in the air, “Are you done?”

Shane huffs looking up, “Yeah, I guess we all are.”

Rick’s gaze looks gently around the room, eyes taking in every detail. Takes in how Bella crawls from Carl to her father that lays on the ground. 

The man moistens his lips and turns his tired eyes, “You're lying about no hope. If that were true, you'd have bolted with the rest or taken the easy way out. You didn't.” The doctor stayed- watched his wife die. He killed the thing she became… and he stayed- he tried to figure out what this was. “You chose the hard path.”

“It doesn't matter now… not anymore.”

Rick looks at the man, “It does matter. It always matters. You stayed when others ran. Your wife didn't have a choice. You do.” He bends down to look at the man- if this didn’t work… nothing will. The clock was ticking away, only ten minutes left. “That's... that's all we want... a choice, a chance. Let us keep trying as long as we can.”

Jenner stays silent and everyone looks him down. Silent prayers sent to the heavens that the man would let them leave, let them try. They’ve fought so hard- lost so much. It can't end like this.

The doctor's eyes drift gently across the room before landing on the man who almost blew his head off and the girl that clings desperately to his chest. Bella’s burning red eyes look up to meet his gaze and a pained smile carves into his face, “I hope you’ve grabbed some books you like.” With that he stands and swipes his key card with a number code entered onto a pad. “I told you topside locked down. I can't open those.” The metal door slides open startling Daryl and T-Dog that remained trying to break the door down. The sight of the door startles everyone to stand. Jenner looks at Rick, “There's your chance. Take it.”

“I'm grateful.” Rick says.

“The day will come when you won't be.”

Jenner’s words are final as he sits down in his seat to wait.

The group begins their run- the timer drops to 6 minutes. They need to climb stairs, find an exit, and get far enough away they won’t burn with the building and they have only… five minutes now.

Random bags are grabbed and feet pound on the ground. Bella and Shane stop alongside Lori and Carl who look at Rick that stands facing Jenner. 

“Ms. Jacqui?!” Bella calls- why wasn’t she coming?

“I’ll be right behind you sweetie!” The tearful woman calls back with a simple nod and smile. 

The nod is followed by Shane’s hands grabbing underneath Bella's arms- the man picks her up and leads Carl and Lori out- Rick right behind them as Jacqui sits down alongside Jenner and Andrea sits empty on the ground with Dale going after the woman.

The group rushes to the surface. Everyone tries the exits that make no sign of opening. Jenner said the top was locked- they were still stuck.

But the group didn’t need the doors to open- they’ll make their own exit. With a shout of warning Daryl smacks the large floor-to-ceiling windows with a metal chair. But the chair does not even scratch.

The metal chair bounces off the glass and out of Daryl’s hands. Shane drops Bella and raises his gun- the shot does the same damage as the metal chair.

“The glass won't break?” Sophia cries out.

But it will. Carol pulls out a hand grenade from her bag- her hand shakes violently as she hands it to Rick. The man had found it all those nights ago when he was in Atlanta city- when he had crawled inside a tank to escape walkers that wanted to rip him apart alongside the horse that had fallen to the road. The short-haired woman had found it when she washed Rick’s clothes.

Rick nods and moves swiftly to the window as the group crouches behind stairs. A simple pull of the pin has Rick running from the window- the explosion that follows sends the sheriff flying about five feet and the window shattering to the ground.

Cheers of excitement form as everyone rushes to the exit and jumps to the grass. Everyone sprints away from the building- it could blow any second. 

Reaching the vehicles everyone moves to start them- they needed to get the hell away from the building. But before anyone can move Glenn stops Rick from starting the RV, “Wait wait. They're coming!” Andrea and Dale crawl from the broken window and begin their run to the cars- but the clock was almost to zero. 

Shane stands in his open Jeep and shouts to the pair, “Dale, get down! Down!” Dale and Andrea drop roughly behind a stack of sandbags. Shane had roughly set a timer on his watch and if he timed it properly then it would be going off-

BOOM! 

The sound rips past everyone's ears as the CDC explodes. The flames spread from the inside stopping at the edge of the building as a sphere of air forms. Cement crumbles as three seconds tick by and the air shield snaps. A wave of hot air shooting out and pushing everything in its place.

The building rips and tears- the sound of their previous safe haven crumbling to nothing but fire and rubble. 

The flames reach high, and the smoke burns black as the group turn away from the building and drive away.

Jacqui and Jenner left in the rubble.

Chapter Text

The only sound in the RV was the hum of the engine and the tinkering of a gun. Sat at the RV’s small dining table, Shane and Bella pull apart handguns. Bella slides the pieces apart before laying them out in an organized manner for her dad to grab and oil. The man had fallen behind on cleaning the weapons and decided to fill the time.

No one had truly spoken since they had escaped the CDC. The only words that were shared were directions from Glenn to Dale and small commands shared between the group. No one mentions what occurred; the loss of Jacqui- a kind and caring woman, Jenner- the man that tried to kill them all, and Andrea- who almost blew herself and Dale up and now lives in an air of anger and resentment.

The tears on everyone’s cheeks had dried long ago but Bella’s eyes were the only ones that remained puffy and red. Her tears stopped within the first minutes of the new road trip, but the evidence was still noticeable, now two hours and twenty-six minutes into the drive.

Sitting across from her dad, Bella pushes pieces of a handgun back together- her dad’s eyes tracking the movements. The young girl knew what to do… and an overseeing eye never hurt. They can’t have the gun misfiring, can they?

With a final click of the handgun, Bella sets it down in front of herself. “Good. You remembered.” Shane praises grabbing at the gun to give his own little inspection- they both knew it wasn’t needed, he was watching the entire time.

Bella smiles brightly, “You told me too, daddy.”

A light chuckle escapes Shane. The man drops the clean weapon to the duffle it is housed before reaching behind his back. “Here, try this one.” Pulled from his waist band is a Sig 1911-22 handgun. Its metal is a dark shined black with a handle grip made up of blood red wood. And engraved in the weapon is a small butterfly with Bella and Shane’s initials. “Better get used to that one, Princess.” Shane hands the weapon over to the girl.

The weapon is large in the girl’s hands, but her grin is infectious as she pulls at the weapon. He had the gun made specially for her.

It seems like a lifetime ago when the father-daughter duo went into a gun shop in their small hometown. Shane had dropped off his personal handgun the day before to get it altered by their friend, Mr. Beets, and took his girl to pick it up after school.

She had a tendency to browse every store she was in- she’d comment on everything she thought was pretty or cool looking all while proclaiming, ‘I want that!’. But of course, Shane could not buy everything the girl liked nor did she truly expect her dad to buy her any of it. But in Beets Gun Store, her eye had caught on the gun she claimed was ‘the prettiest of them all’ and said if she ever had a gun, she’d want that one.

Shane had asked her what she liked about it. “The color is pretty. But I would want to have a butterfly engraved… maybe our initials too.” Mr. Beets, the kind man he was, thoroughly agreed with the young girl and promised that one day he would engrave a weapon for her himself.

And he did. Shane had returned the next day in uniform to purchase the gun and have the old man grave everything his daughter had mentioned. HerThe father wanted to be the one to purchase Bella’s first gun- he wanted to give his daughter everything he could. The man had planned to wait until she was at least fifteen but something in his gut told him to do it now.

And it’s a good thing too. Cause not even three months later the outbreak took over the world.

Cleaning the outside of her weapon the girl smiles- she had known about the gun, but Shane didn’t want her to have it just yet. He would always be near her; she didn’t need to worry about protecting herself.

Looking across from the RV, Andrea moves to rest her arms against her knees. The blonde woman rests her face in her hands, “Looks complicated.” She comments towards Shane as he oils the barrel of a gun. Bella looks over to the woman that leans heavily towards Shane.

“The trick is getting all these pieces back together the same way. I could clean yours… Show you how.” He comments towards the woman. Andrea smiles at him before reaching into the duffel where her gun resided at the moment. Handing it to Shane, her hand brushes closely against the man’s, “Oh yeah. It’s a sweet piece.” He comments with a tight smile.

“It was a gift from my father.” The woman's eyes drift for a moment as she speaks, “He gave it to me just before Amy and I took off on our road trip. He said two girls on their own should be able to defend themselves.” Her sentence ends with her eyes drifting back into the world- her mind no longer drawing on the memories of her family.

“Smart man, your father.”

Andrea laughs with a big smile, “Looks like our dads think alike.” She says towards Bella who still rubs her gun with the cleaning cloth.

Bella doesn’t even raise her head in response, “I wouldn’t say that.” She punctuates with snapping the magazine into the base of the gun- the safety on.

Taken back for a mere second, Shane raises his eyes before turning back to Andrea, “Look, it's a- it's a limited capacity. See?” He draws Andrea’s stunned face back to him, “Only holds seven rounds.”

Andrea merely nods gently in response, taken aback by Bella’s words.

It was common for the young girl to give snappy, typically rude or cold, responses back to people; however, the group had not experienced the quips of Bella. Shane was used to his daughter’s comments, he would try to redirect her but had realized quickly that she was his daughter, and the task would be harder than traveling to the moon.

So now he merely gives a stern look to the girl before ignoring her comment and continuing the conversation. They had agreed she would withhold the quips best she could, and he wouldn’t have to punish her- nothing terrible. If Shane were being honest, he agreed with most of Bella’s comments even though he shouldn’t. The girl had been doing good with keeping the comments to herself.

With the disregard to Bella, Shane begins his memorized lecture on handguns as the RV slows to a snail’s pace, “Oh jeez. Aw no.” Dale calls out as he pulls slowly past multiple run-down cars.

All gathered at the front of the RV to look through the windows, the road ahead is littered with cars. The area is dropped in stillness as though looking at a worn-out old picture. The pop of Daryl’s motorcycle calms as he pulls alongside the driver’s window, “See a way through?” Dale asks.

Daryl gives a curt nod before revving his bike and moving forward, leading Dale through the mass of cars. Glenn stares down at his map, “Uh, maybe we should just go back. There’s an interstate bypass-”

“We can’t spare the fuel.”

Dale’s words quiet the group as they pass almost halfway through the cars. The last time they saw cars piled close like this was during outbreak day. Fear clustered together in groups of cars with no true escape.

“Daddy, we could go on the other side. There’s less cars.” Bella calls out with a point of her hand. The road across the grass strip of land meant to break the lanes of traffic had significantly less cars but the drop of land would prove to be difficult.

But another problem arises with the- POP! - of the RV’s engine. Swearing under his breath, Dale slows the RV to a stop- halting the car behind that held Lori, Rick, Carl, Carol, and Sophia inside. Daryl looks back at the sound and turns his bike around.

The group spills out of the RV door in a single file line to crowd among the front of the RV. The hot air of summer smacks harshly against everyone- the peak of summer may have passed but it seems like fall is ages away.

Dale’s eyes stare annoyed at the smoking RV, or steaming- Bella couldn’t truly tell the difference, “I said it. Didn’t I say it? A thousand times dead in the water.”

Carl comes alongside Bella, who stands behind Shane, “Problem Dale?” Shane calls.

“Oh, just a small matter of being stuck in the middle of nowhere, with no hope of-” Everyone stares at Dale as he turns in his spot. The old man’s words die on his tongue as he looks at the untouched abandoned cars, a layer of dust and debris on all of them, “Okay, that was dumb.” He changes in an easy tone.

Shane rests his shotgun gently against his shoulder, “If we can’t find a radiator hose here…”

“There’s a whole bunch of stuff we can find.” Daryl states as he cracks open the window of a trunk to dig through the things inside.

“Can siphon more fuel from these cars for a start.” Says T-Dog.

“Maybe some water?” Carol adds hopefully.

Glenn nods in agreement, “Or food.” They needed everything. Food, water, clothes, supplies- everything they had was blown up within the CDC, only a few bags of belongings were salvaged.

The prospect of getting supplies got the group excited- they won’t have to go to bed hungry or go to sleep hungry… or just be hungry. They can find food, fresh water, and semi clean clothes. The group as a whole was starting to stink even with the clean clothes from Jenner.

“This is a graveyard…” Lori’s voice cuts in- stilling the group to turn to the women. “I don’t know how I feel about this.” Her voice is quiet as she stares into a car that holds an unmoving corpse of a woman- her skin tight and wrinkled as though her life was drawn from her body.

All the corpses look like their life was drawn from them.

The silence floods the area with a heavy stone dropping into everyone’s gut. The woman has a point- this place is a graveyard with corpses at every turn. How can any of them feel safe here? They are stuck here- they can’t even escape if they need to.

With a clap of his hands, Shane breaks the air of tension and draws eyes to him, “Come on y’all. Look around, gather what you can.” The unspoken command of, ‘be careful’, laced in his voice.

Living bodies move without struggle- hand gripping at trunks and car doors. There had to be at least a hundred cars and vehicles on the stretch of highway- who knows what kind of gold mine it could be for them.

Splitting into groups, Carl, Bella, and Sophia follow behind Carol and Lori- Shane digs into a trunk close by Glenn who tries to fix the RV’s engine.

“Kids, don’t look.” Carol commands looking back to the children that trail behind like little ducklings.

Standing side by side Bella and Carl look into a car- the inside empty of any bodies but dull dried blood was splattered across the far side of the car’s interior. The gentle hand of Lori’s pulls the pair back from the window as though the mother feared something popping up from the inside to take the kids from her grasp.

The low sound of hinges, shifting boxes, and random noises drift through the path of the cars- everyone picking through items with fear a walker may come from within. Fearful as though the walking corpses were hiding behind every corner… waiting for them to turn their backs to the danger.

The slight touch of Bella and Carl’s shoulders is pulled apart as Sophia wedges herself between the two. Bella looks at Sophia in surprise as the thin girl shows Carl something she found, her shoulder going cold from where it was pressed against Carl. The boy looks on in fascination while Bella sneers over Sophia’s turned shoulder- the thing wasn’t even that cool, it was just a toy or something.

“Hey Carl?” Lori calls out drawing the children’s attention, “Always within my sight, okay?” The boy gives his mother a gentle nod back.

Carol stops digging through clothing to peek around the car, “You too, Sophia.”

All in understanding the children move to continue searching when Shane’s voice calls out from twenty feet away. “Bella-?” He begins to speak.

“Yes, daddy.” The girl calls out now back alongside her place by Carl. Her father was going to say the same thing as the mothers- it wasn't hard to guess.

Slowly passing the dusty cars, Bella looks down into a dusty box styled SUV- the inside was filled with many totes and bags. From her view outside she could spot the bright red box of, hopefully, a med kit.

Her hands try for the trunk but the hinged door doesn’t move. She moves past Carl, who simply watches the girl at work. At the driver’s side door sits an unmoving corpse like the others- the impossibly thin man’s head leans heavily against the door. Testing the door’s handle Bella pulls it open to watch the corpse fall to the ground.

The thump of the body causes Sophia and Carl to squeak quietly and step back- their eyes comically wide as the girl leans over to unlock the car for the trunk. Carl and Sophia stare at the girl as she picks up the bottom of her white, well… off white skirt with the dirt that was dusting the clothing, up slightly so she could step over the corpse that was face down on the pavement.

The pair from the side moves away from the corpse towards Bella as she opens the trunk. Even only twenty feet away- Carol and Lori had not noticed the little moment with the body… they merely continued to dig through their respected trunks.

With the trunk now open, Bella picks gently at the belongings inside. The totes and bags she is after are covered with what looked like comforters and blankets- the pattern may have been a pretty floral, but the texture caused a shiver up the girl’s spine.

Tossing the blankets to the side she pulls at a heavy tote- a grunt escaping her mouth. The thing seemed to be 1,000 pounds to the girl.

Cracking the green lid off, Bella frisbees it off to the side of the road alongside the blankets, “What are you doing?” Carl calls, stepping alongside his friend to peek over her shoulder.

“Looking for stuff.”

Sophia moves from foot to foot, “The adults are supposed to be looking.” Her voice calls out dipped in fear. The area may not be all sunshine and rainbows, but did Sophia really have to act like such a scared little duckling?

“Hum…” Bella responds with a slight roll of her eyes as her hand makes contact with something special. A bright smile fills Bella's face as she pulls the item out to hand to her friend, “Here, Carl.”

Carl’s face brightens like the morning sun at the sight of an X-Man comic book sitting in her hand. “Awesome! Thanks, Bee.” The front page is turned the moment Carl gets both hands on it, he almost skips his way over to Lori with the book in his hands to sit and read.

The once believed med kit turns out to be a bust. And it takes a few more minutes of digging for Bella to find something of even remote importance- most of it was ugly clothes, photos and memory books. It is underneath a pile of photo albums that Bella pulls out a weird bumpy pillowcase.

Shaking it slightly causes the sound of rattling to reach Bella’s ears. Zipping open the pillowcase exposes multiple medicine bottles; yellow, orange, and white, a mix-match of prescription and over-the-counter meds. There must’ve been at least thirty different bottles! “Daddy! Look what I found!” Bella calls out as she jogs swiftly over to the RV, the bag swinging back and forth in her hands.

As if presenting a cure to the outbreak, Bella stands with a glowing smile with the bag hanging in front of her. Her daddy grabs the grab and peaks inside, a sideways grin forming on his face. “Nice find, Sweetheart!” He praises as he shows off the bag to Rick who approaches at Bella’s call. “Good job, Princess. This is real important.” He kisses her head a few times to show his happiness as he cradles her cheek.

“What you got there?” Dale calls from the top of the RV.

“A big bag of drugs. We’ll have to look through it later.” Shane replies as he tosses the back up to the man once he has rezipped the pillowcase. Dale shakes the bag up and down as if weighing it and gives the young girl a praising smile.

Meds are as important as weapons, food, water… they needed them. You can’t kill a cold with a bullet… well you could but it wouldn’t be the only thing dying.

Rick adjusts his rifle in his hands, “Good job, Bee.”

“Thank you, Mr. Grimes.”

Shane ruffles the girl's curls once more. He was terrified of her leaving his side but look at her- finding gold and helping the group. His little girl wasn't supposed to grow up so fast, “Keep looking, Princess. But stay close and be careful.”

Bella smiles and turns, “Yep-” She calls out as she joins Carl’s side once more. He dog-eared his page before placing it down, he only had so many things he enjoyed reading- he didn’t want to finish the comic within thirty minutes.

Hoping off the sedan’s truck he had climbed upon, Carl joins alongside Bella as she drifts past cars that were already dug through. The pair moves alongside a convertible, what a stupid car to take during the apocalypse, even with the dust layered on the paint, the pretty blue of the car came through.

“Ew, that’s nasty!” Carl exclaims as they look at the corpse that wears a full black suit. The man seemed to once be a businessman- maybe a CEO? Everything about the inside of the car seemed expensive.

Bella stares at the man, head tilting side-to-side as if trying to figure out a riddle, “Do you think it's alive?”

“Doesn’t seem like it.” Carl responds with a shrug, his face distorted in disgust as the smell truly hits him.

The area reeks of death and decay…all highlighted by the multiple buzzing flies that travel in the air.

With his hand now covering his nose, Carl watches as Bella raises her finger to poke at the corpse. “Don’t touch it!” He whispers-screams, he didn’t want to get her in trouble, but he also didn’t want her to lose her finger to a walker.

Bella pouts as Carl pulls her hand away, “Don’t be a scaredy cat, Carl.” She calls out.

Carl pulls her arm away, eyes stuck on the corpse as though it may turn and grab Bella’s back, “Sorry I don’t want you to die.” He proclaims as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Bella giggles and dramatically pulls her hand away, “It’s fine.” Even though her words claim her unafraid, she remains next Carl now five feet away from the exposed body. “Why do you think they're still here?” She questions into the air in wonder- it didn’t make sense to her. They died; shouldn’t they be walkers? “They didn’t seem to turn- so they just died?”

“I’m not a scientist, Bee.”

Bella laughs and turns to Carl, “Trust me- I know.” Carl trails behind her as she moves away from the fancy car and over to a minivan, the inside visibly empty of bodies.

The girl planned to search for more things- hopefully she could find a new dress or skirt. What kind of person wears a white skirt to begin with? Especially during the end of the world.

Skimming through the trunk of the vehicle she pulls at a child’s bag, bright pink with Barbie vinyl on the side. The inside only held stuffed animals and toys- nothing useful or even nice.

“Try finding more comics.”

Bella snaps her head to Carl with the last duffle in her hands, “Why do I have to do it?” Her voice pitches high.

Carl sits inside the trunk facing his friend all while swinging his feet, “Because I asked.” The smile on his face breaks the annoyance on Bella’s. With a huff she grabs at a loose shirt to throw at Carl.

The cloth hits him square in the face causing a laugh to bubble heavily out Bella's mouth. Carl’s expression sent the girl into a bent over laughing fit. The boy could not believe his friend just threw a dusty shirt in his face- it wouldn’t be the first time they threw things at each other but, a dusty shirt? Gross.

With her grin still straining her cheeks, Bella begins digging through the duffle once more. Lori approaches the pair to begin searching through a car a couple handfuls of feet away. The laughter of the children floated across the cars picking up the shoulders of everyone in the group.

Potentially dangerous environment or not- hearing the kids laugh freely and without care brought warmth to their chests. They weren’t afraid and it was… peaceful.

Inside she finds many women’s clothing; blouses and tank tops- but hidden at the bottom of the bag Bella grasps at an item.

“What is that?” Carl questions at the sight of an object wrapped within a blouse.

Bella shrugs as she begins unrolling the object, “I don’t know.” Fully unwrapped the pair stare at the bright pink cylinder- one end was a curve and the other seemed… fat? Still holding the objects in the blouse, Bella and Carl look closely at the foreign object. “There’s batteries in it.” Bella states as she looks at the, maybe, bottom of the thing.

Their brains work hard trying to figure out what it was… why would it be wrapped up hidden at the bottom of the duffle? It must be something important, right? Sighing, Bella ponders out loud, “Maybe it’s a toy… oh!” She shouts, throwing the item away from herself to the ground causing Lori to look over, “Ew! Ew! Gross!” She screams as she wipes the hand that was holding the offensive object, through a blouse but still, onto Carl’s shirt.

The girl had pieced the information together; a weird cylinder shape, like Ms. Smith mentioned during that biology lesson, batteries that could make something move... and Andrea’s comment back at the quarry all those days ago.

The girl gagged dramatically as Carl jumped away from her offending hand, “Stop!”

Lori is by the pair’s side within a moment searching for the source that caused the girl to shout, “What’s going on?” Bella points to the ground where the object now laid.

The laugh that escapes Lori’s mouth is bright and quick- she could barely calm it in her chest. “I need to bleach my hands.” She says as she holds her hands away from her. Lori tries not to chuckle as she kicks the toy away and underneath a car.

Motioning she leads the pair away to give Bella some soap and water. Carl repeatedly asked what it was- no one would answer the boy. And Bella… well she was officially done with searching- never again would she do that.

With her hands clean, Bella rests atop a car’s hood as Shane fixes up a blue hatch-back car. The man had found the seemingly best vehicle abandoned in the area and started his fix. The Jeep had run out of fuel within the first thirty minutes of the trip from the CDC- so he needed a new ride.

Sitting with her daddy, she tries to listen to the information about fixing a car’s engine he’s giving her… but Bella’s eyes merely follow Carl who stands along Sophia.

The young girl has been tracking her friend oddly for a while. Eyes always following from afar if she wasn’t by his side- always trying to be next to him. Though it's not truly strange… their kids. They know so little of the world and what they did know was ripped away from them.

Their home- their world was thrown into madness and death, all set ablaze by fire from the people that were meant to protect them. People, neighbors, friends- they once knew turned into animals and monsters, beating, stealing... killing people. How was anyone expected to handle this new world? Especially children.

Noticing her silence, Shane stops whatever he was doing to look up, “You okay, Princess?” He grabs a towel to wipe the grease from his hands.

Bella brings her eyes to Shane and gives him a genuine small smile, “I’m okay, Daddy.” A look begins to form on Shane’s face, “Your neck is healing nice.” She says- seemingly to change the subject. Bella was his daughter- he knew when she wasn’t okay, knew when she was trying to change the subject.

“It wasn’t that bad.” He says, smacking the grease cloth in his hand. How was he supposed to ask his daughter this? That night in the CDC- it wasn’t Bella that scratched him… it was Lori. He made a… a mistake and Lori scratched him. No one but him and Lori knew but- Bella was taking the blame? “How exactly did you scratch me so bad?” He asks with a raised eyebrow.

Bella takes a pregnant pause before shrugging her shoulders, “I don’t know- it was dark.”

“You don’t know?” He responds in question.

Bella shakes her head, “No, daddy. I don’t remember.”

The man looks to the ground in thought. Bella takes the moment of thought to hop off the car’s hood and skip over to Carl who had waved her over.

Shane watches as Bella joins Carl- the pair immediately falling into joyous conversation. She may be his little girl and he was the only one to have raised her, no mother to care for Bella, but sometimes he felt so lost. There are times where he doesn’t know what to do, how to help his little girl. What kind of father doesn’t know how to care for his child?

It makes him feel so lost. He never planned to have a child, at least not so soon. And when he learned of Bella’s birth, he was so… angry- he was in his prime, he couldn’t- scratch that- didn’t want to have a child. And now he had no choice but to be a father.

And now… he wouldn’t change it for the world. Bella was his sweet little girl- already so strong and brave in her young age. Shane feels nothing but happiness and pride looking at her.

But it doesn’t erase the fact that she terrifies him at times. He didn’t know how to deal with most of the situations that came along with being a father- he had figured most out but there were still times he struggled. Like now.

Bella claims to have scratched him in the dark but… the father-daughter duo both know it wasn’t her. They could see that in each other's eyes. So why was she taking the blame? Did she know what happened in the rec room? What had happened before that?

No- no- it’s impossible. Lori and Shane kept it quiet, their little affair. If you could call it that, they thought Rick was dead. They found comfort in each other… but now he’s back and they… stopped.

None of it made sense. It was all too much at once. Everything twisted in reality- none of this was supposed to happen, to even be possible.

Shane’s mind twists and turns, trying to understand everything. He knew the new reality but not everyone else did and it didn’t-

“Under the cars!” Rick's whisper-shout breaks Shane’s thoughts. The man jogs over to the children and mothers to command them as well.

Turning to look at the way they had come shows the slow approach of death. Walkers, too many to fight, make their way around the cars closer to the RV and the group.

Shane grasps at an unmoving Glenn to pull him underneath a large truck. He wanted to run for his daughter, but she was too far, and he would lead the walkers right to her.

Following Rick’s words, everyone hides themselves underneath vehicles and cars. “What do we do?!” Sophia whispers to Bella as they stand on the road- Bella merely grasps her arm and pulls her down. The girls were slightly farther away than Carl and the moms, and they needed to hide now.

The girls drag themselves on the pavement as Carol cries for her daughter underneath a separate car with Lori. Sophia clutches tight to her teddy doll and turns to speak but Bella merely covers her mouth with her hand and shushes her. No one wanted to get eaten alive and Bella was not going to have Sophia be the reason she was.

Holding each other's hands, Bella and Sophia watch alongside everyone else as the walkers make their way closer… and pass. They’re going pass them! They don’t even notice them.

But even though the walkers can’t see them, it doesn’t calm the tension in everyone’s heart. The area is silent alongside the drag of dead feet and moaning corpses searching for a piece of fresh flesh.

Sophia hiccups underneath Bella’s hand causing the girl to pull her closer to the middle of the car. Perhaps Bella shouldn’t have given Sophia the side closest to the road and the mass of walkers.

It takes five minutes of heart pounding silence for the mass to pass the cars- the time feels like years. Lips quiver, eyes water, and hand ball tight as they wait- running and hiding… It was the new way of life. And they weren’t made for it.

It takes another five minutes for the groans and dragging of feet to grow quiet- the sounds are still present, but they are far away now, and it releases a fraction of the tension in the air. Hands pulled back to herself Bella tries looking for her dad underneath the car with slight moves of her head. Carl was close by, so she knew he was fine. They were all fine.

It’s during her search for her daddy that Sophia begins her move. The girl slowly drags her body out from underneath the car. Bella notices the movement from the corner of her eye and her heart drops. Why the hell is she moving?! No one else is moving.

Grasping the back of the girl’s shirt, Bella tries to pull her back, but the effort is wiped away swiftly as a strong groan comes from the road and the legs of a corpse fit themselves in the area between the road and the bottom of the car they laid under.

Sophia cries out as she retracts her movements forcing Bella out the other side with the male walker dropping to the ground to crawl underneath the car. Two more pairs of feet show next to the third.

Bella picks herself off the ground the moment she is out and pulls the other girl’s arm roughly and without care. She begins to lead them back the way they had driven from- away from the mass and towards her daddy. He would protect them.

But Sophia pulls her towards the woods with near silent cries. Bella fights against Sophia grasp but it's too strong and the opportunity is lost as the walkers block both easy exits to the road.

Hoping over the guardrail the pair slides down the hill that lifts the highway- the walkers following close behind. The fresh corpses are strong and fast.

The pair runs through the trees and over roots, stumbling from time to time as fear washes over them. They’re in the woods running from three walkers alone. They're alone… Sophia pulled them into the woods alone.

The pair runs and hops over rocks as the sounds of the walkers continue their pursuit behind them. The cries of Sophia grow louder the longer they run.

Taking a swift turn around a rocky hill the girls slam into a solid body. Screams begin to escape their mouths but are quelled as they stare up at the sweaty face of Rick.

Chest huffing Bella looks at the man, “Mr. Grimes?!"

“Shh, shh. Are you both alright?” He questions as he looks them both over- Bella nods her head as Sophia reaches towards Rick’s revolver.

“Shoot them!” She cries out but Rick pulls her back.

“No, no. Those walkers on the road will hear it. Then it wouldn’t just be three, it’d be hundreds.” His breath is racing as hard as the girls’. The sound of the walkers grows closer and Rick huffs before hauling Sophia in his arms, “Alright, come on.” Bella nods in understanding and follows the man.

Jogging as fast as Rick can with a 100-pound child in his arms they make it towards a pissy little stream. Rick looks back for the walkers- they’re still after them but they have some time.

Dropping Sophia from his arms, Rick hopes into the stream. Grabbing under their armpits, Rick drops the girls into the running water from the four-foot ledge they stood atop of. He leads them to an overhang made of the roots of a fallen tree.

The stream must’ve run the dirt from the roots long ago and now Rick pushes for the girls to go underneath. “Alright, come on. Sophia, Bella, you have to do exactly as I say. Hide there.” They stand just out the roots, “Squeeze in tight. I'll draw them away from you.”

Sophia pulls her pants up on her waist as she speaks, “No no, don't leave us.” Her voice is dripping in fear.

Rick bends down to the girl, “Listen listen listen listen. They don't get winded. I do.” He explains to Sophia- Bella already knew to listen to Rick if her daddy wasn’t there. “I can only deal with them one at a time. I won't be able to protect you. This is how we all survive. You understand?” Sophia nods her head painfully. No one wanted to be left in woods where cannibal corpses were roaming. “If I don't make it back, run back to the highway, back to the others straight the way we came. Keep the sun on your left shoulder. Okay?” He huffs harshly as the walkers grow significantly closer to the trio.

Rick stares between the two girls- he didn’t want to leave them… but what else was he supposed to do? Bella nods her head when Rick looks at her, “Squeeze in tight, if you don’t come- go back the way we came. Keeping the sun on our left shoulder.” She repeats with shallow breaths.

The relief can be seen on Rick’s face with Bella’s words- she knows and understands. With a strained smile, Rick pushes the pair underneath the roots as the walkers have now spotted the man in the river.

Squeezed in tight, the pair watches Rick call for the walkers, “Come on! You ugly son of a bitch. Come on! Come on!” Two of the walkers splash harshly into the river from the fall of the bank and stand quickly to follow after the man as he leads them away.

And left behind is Bella and Sophia squeezed tightly against the dirt walls of their protection… all while hoping the ground would swallow them whole if it meant they were safe.

Chapter Text

“Sure this is the spot?” Daryl questions as he looks inside the roots Rick had left Sophia and Bella in. It had been only thirty minutes, Rick killed the three walkers within fifteen minutes and the rest was filled with running and grouping up with the other men that looked through the area.

Rick points at the roots in frustration, “I left them right here.” He turns into another direction, “I drew the walkers way off in that direction up the creek.” He explains once more. He had rushed back as fast as he could for the two girls… but they were gone. As if they were never there.

“Then where are they?!” Shane shouts as he paces the stream. 

The father hadn’t realized his daughter was chased off the highway until Rick was deep into the woods- too far away to follow. 

“They were gone by the time I got back here.” He speaks painfully but underlaid with hope, “I figured they just took off and ran back to the group. I told them to go that way and keep the sun on their left shoulder.” The girls are gone so they must’ve gone back to the highway. Shane, however, is not convinced as gives Rick a death stare strong enough to kill every walker on the planet. “Bella repeated what I said, she knew what to do.” Rick pushes. 

Shane huffs and waves his arms out as if asking, ‘where are they then?’ “What about Sophia?” He questions pointing his gun out to the ground in anger, “She is the one that got Bella into this- probably took her off track too.” The man’s words are spit in disgust. Sophia’s stupid actions put his little girl in danger- of course he’s gonna be pissed. Carol couldn’t teach her daughter how to shut up and stay put?

“This isn’t Sophia’s fault, Shane.” Rick sighs in a final declaration. His feet take him closer to the fuming man, “We’re gonna find Bella- and Sophia. They understood me fine.” His words are spoken as though Rick knew the future but everything in Shane's gut told him otherwise.

“Hey, short round, why don't you step off to one side? You're mucking up the trail.” Daryl commands Glenn, the last man of the group, who stands directly in the trail of the girls. The young adult takes a step to the side and into brush. Daryl turns to Rick and Shane waiting for the next step- he could track them, there’s a trail, he just needed them to finish whatever piss fest they were doing. 

Shane sighs with an almost unnoticeable grasp to his stomach. “Listen, man, the kids’ tired and scared. They had their close call, three walkers.” He starts in an attempt to calm himself- his anger would only hurt Bella, “Got to wonder how much of what you said stuck.” Bella was smart but she just faced death- who knows how she reacted.

“Got clear prints right here.” Daryl says looking closely to the tracks where Glenn once stood on the bank.  “They did like you said, headed back to the highway. Let's spread out, make our way back.” The redneck commands as he stands to pull himself up. His eyes remain glued to the ground as she tracks the young girls’ prints back towards the highway where they once came.

“They couldn't have gone far.” Rick says as he and Shane climb out of the creak with the helping hand of Glenn. “Hey, we're gonna find Bella. And Sophia.” Rick stops Shane from continuing after Daryl.

“We better.” Shane states simply adjusting his shotgun tightly in his hands. Turning to look at his brother he drops his head- he can’t do this. He can’t break now when his daughter needs him. “They'll be tuckered out hiding in a bush somewhere.” He says out loud- perhaps to calm himself. But it only makes him more worried.

The group of four travel quickly and carefully, all led by Daryl who tracks the girls with practiced ease. Daryl is a redneck with a juvenile past that was taught to track and hunt as a child- this was a simple track… for the most part.

The tracker slows to a stop in the middle of a decent sized opening, “They were doing just fine till right here.” He points where he sees the track and the direction they stop “Just had to keep going.” Rick bends down alongside Daryl. “One of them veered off that way, and the other there.” Shane looks around the area, “Looks like there was a little skuffle, one of ‘em fell.”

“Why would they do that?” Questions Glenn.

Shane looks down to Rick, loosely controlled pain drawn tight over his face, “Maybe they saw something that spooked ‘em, made them run off, made ‘em fall.”

“A walker?”

Daryl shakes his head, “I don't see any other footprints. Just theirs.” The man stares down at the tracks- he’d never seen this before. Tracks cut off. It’s weird… its not normal. Daryl couldn’t pinpoint what was wrong with them.

“So what? Now we have to go searching in two different directions?” Glenn questions, the sun had passed its peak and night was approaching. They had approximately five hours of sunlight left and they still needed to inform the group of what was happening.

Rick shakes his head, “No, we-”

Crunch… crunch…

The men draw their weapons up swiftly in the direction the crunching leaves come from. They hold their sights on the ruffling leaves of the bush as it grows more aggressive. 

A hand peek out of the bush to push the leaves aside. “Dad?” Comes Bella’s small voice that is strained painfully. Her bloodshot blue eyes connect with her dad’s quickly, “Daddy?!” She shouts in excited disbelief. 

Her feet close the distance swiftly before the men can even drop their weapons. The girl jumps into her daddy’s arms and Shane holds her tight enough to stop her breaths. Pulling Bella back Shane’s eyes darted up and down, “Are you hurt?! Bit?! What happened?!” He grabs at Bella. He picks the bottom of her skirt up to check her legs, he turns her arms around, and peeks over her shoulder to look at her back.

Bella nods with a strong teared sniffle, “I’m okay, daddy. Nothing got me- my ankle hurts though.” She says looking down to her right foot that she tries to lean off of. Bella’s ankle was swelling and already bruising at the bump. It seems they know which one of them fell.

The man grabs gently at her calf- her knees skinned in long streaks from the fall. “Looks like you rolled it, Princess.” He says as he touches it gently.

Rick smiles and bends down alongside Shane, “Bella!” His eyes are filled with concern and Bella gives him a small smile, “What happened? Where’s Sophia?” He questions once Shane gives his final check.

“I don’t know.” She responds looking between the men as they look down at her.

“You don’t know?”

Bella shakes her head and tears start to brim in her eyes, “I tried to get her to wait but she wanted to leave.” She sniffles and wipes her nose with the back of her hand. “So we went back to the highway and there was a noise… she ran off and I fell.” Her eyes look back to Shane, “She was gone by the time I got back up.”

Glenn is the most expressive of the group when she speaks. “What way?” The Asian man asks.

Bella points her finger into the woods, “She went in that direction.” The men looked in the direction she pointed and started to plan.

“Why aren't we all out there looking?” Carol’s fingers are bleeding from where she chews on them, “Why are we moving cars?” Her face turns for a mere moment from the woods to the men behind her. The mother hadn’t left since Sophia and Bella ran off- how could she?

Dale twists the wrench in his palm, “We have to clear enough room so I can get the R.V. turned around as soon as it's running. Now that we have fuel we can double back to a bypass that Glenn flagged on the map.” 

“Going back's going to be easier than trying to get through this mess.”

Carol looks in worried disbelief, “We're not going anywhere till my daughter gets back.” Her voice wavers in its firmness. It was probably the first time she ever stood up for herself- she didn't do it when it came to Ed.

Lori touches the worried mother’s shoulder, “Hey, that goes without saying.”

“Rick and Daryl, they're on it, okay?” Shane reaffirms to the woman, “Just a matter of time.”

Andrea nods and looks around, “Can't be soon enough for me. I'm still freaked out from that herd that passed us by, or whatever you'd call it.” She was stuck in the RV with a walker during the mass with only a flathead dropped down by Dale to defend herself.

“Yeah, what was that? All of them just marching along like that.” Glenn questions.

Everyone is silent, “A herd. That sounds about right.” Shane confirms looking up, “We've seen it. It's like the night camp got attacked. Some wandering pack, only fewer.” Great- another thing the group had to worry about. How the hell are they supposed to survive if a herd like that or larger comes across them? Licking his lip, Shane gives the group a tight nod drawing them away from their thoughts, “Okay. Come on, people. We still have a lot to do. Let's stay on it.”

Walking away from the circle everyone went back to their chores; moving cars, finding supplies, fixing the RV- everyone was working to keep reality from eating away at their minds.

Carl and Bella had no trouble finding distractions. Sitting atop another car, Bella rests her ankle that was now bound with some ace bandage Dale had found- he said it should help with the swelling and pain. The pair reads their respective books- Carl finishing off his X-Men comic and Bella reading through ‘Of Mice and Men’, another thing Dale had given her.

With a tired sigh Carl throws his book to the car’s hood before hopping down. “Hey, don’t leave me alone.” Bella marks her page and slides off the car landing on her good ankle.

“I’m not.” Carl says as Bella moves. “Shane said you need to sit down.” He tries to get her back to the car but the girl won’t hear it.

Bella slaps her friend’s hand, “I’m fine.”

The boy rolls his eyes knowing he couldn’t win. Carl walks through the cars and spots a sun worn red truck. His interested mind controls his movements as he peaks into the truck. “There’s something in there.” The corpse inside has a large roll made of leather under his arm and Carl wanted it. 

He opens the door to the truck’s cab as Bella watches from a few feet away leaning back. Moving carefully Carl looks at the corpse- none of them had moved… but that didn’t mean this one couldn’t. 

Leaning over the man’s dead lap, his eyes dart back-and-forth to the corpse's face in hesitation, Carl grabs at the roll and tugs. And tugs. And tugs. The damn thing is heavier than he expected and wasn’t moving easily.

Carl can feel Bella’s gaze on his back and the grin that is forming on her face. With an internal desire to show Bella he can get the roll, he stands on the truck step and gets both hands gripped on it. 

With all his weight he tugs. “Haha!” He cheers as the roll pulls loose from its spot. The roll now sits atop the corpse's lap and Carl almost vibrates with excitement- it sounds like there's tools or something in it.

The boy grabs the roll and begins to step from the truck- “Ahh!” 

Bella laughs out loud at the sight of Carl on his back, the roll hugged tight to his chest with the corpse now leaning over him. The seatbeat of the truck stopped it from falling on top of the four- eleven boy.

“You okay?” 

Carl gets up with the help of Bella’s hand, “Shut up.” The words are half hearted. Shaking the roll Carl smiles brightly at Bella, “Cool. Come on, let’s show Shane.”

Running, well Carl running then slowing down since Bella can barely walk, the pair gets over to Lori and Shane. With a call out to Shane, Lori is the one to speak first, “Carl, what happened?”

“Bella, you're supposed to be resting.” Shane stresses but the girl ignores him.

Kneeling on the ground Carl starts to unravel the roll, “Mom, we found something cool. Shane, check it out.” Fully open and safety flap up exposes the contents inside. “It's an arsenal!” The boy calls out at the sight of multiple hatchets, machetes and blades; at least ten total.

“That's cool, bud. Go give 'em to Dale.” Shane dismisses. Was he okay?

Bella’s bent down alongside Carl as he pulls out a hatchet, “Check this one out!” The boy swings it gently in place, “Whoa, it's a hatchet.”

Lori takes a step forward causing Carl to stop the short swings, “Be careful. Don't play with those.”

“They're really sharp.” He responds.

“ What did I just say? ” Lori's voice is tight as she stares down at Carl. 

Carl looks up with a grin, “Can I keep one?”

“Can I keep one too?” Bella says as she gently touches the blade of a long thin knife.

Lori stares at the pair in disbelief,  “Are you both crazy?”

The boy’s shoulders drop in unbelievable disappointment, “No way. Shane.” He looks at the man, “Shane, tell her to let me keep one.”

Shane’s face twists swiftly, “Hey, man, go give them all to Dale now! Go.” The man snapped at Carl… “Go with him, Princess.” He commands his daughter.

With disbelief and disappointment across his face, Carl rolls the weapons up and gathers it in his arms. The watering of his eyes are unnoticeable to anyone.

Anyone but Bella. 

The young girl looks at Shane with a sharp and angry look. The girl’s soft features and full cheeks go sharp… as though she was looking at the devil himself. 

How a girl that looks so soft, gentle, and kind can turn herself into such hatred… It was terrifying. And new.

As the pair walks away Lori turns on Shane,  “What was that?” The woman almost spits at the man. What has gotten into him?

Shane has his back turned to the woman as she speaks. “What was what?”

“The way you blew him off just now. You crushed him.” The man keeps his back to her. The act causes Lori to round on Shane as he messes with something under a car’s hood. “I don't believe you. You're giving me the cold shoulder?” She questions in disbelief.

Shane looks up at Lori, sweat dripping down his wavy nose and bouncing off his sharp chin, “Isn't that what you want? Aren't you the one who said ‘stay the hell away from him and you’?” 

The woman’s eyes widen and she takes a step closer to the man, “You forget what happened at the CDC?” Lori questions,  “Your little meltdown in the rec room slip your mind? When you tried-”

“When I tried to, what?” Shane cuts her off looking down at the woman. “What do you think that was?” The man’s face is tight in pain.

“I think it is pretty plain what that was.”

“A mistake.” He spits at her with a shake of his head. What happened- he was drunk and angry and he wasn’t in control. “One that I admit to.” Lori’s eyes soften slightly- as though those words erased the painful truth of what almost happened. “I have a few mistakes under my belt, Lori. So do you.” Shane speaks to her.

“No debate there.” Lori drops her voice down, “But Shane, we need to stop this.” They didn’t need everyone hearing their business and they weren’t being exactly quiet.

Shane gives hers a look and smacks the blue SUV’s body, “Why do you think I'm prepping my new ride?” A pregnant pause fills the air for a moment, “I'm leaving.”

“Leaving?”

“As in gone for good. Gonna quietly slip away the first chance I get.”

Lori nods her head- it would be hard for her, Rick… Carl. But they did something they shouldn’t have and now, they had to deal with it. Crossing her arms, Lori’s eyes drift over to the RV where Bella stands next to Carl- obviously trying to cheer him up. “What about Bella?” She asks. Shane crawls into the driver’s seat to turn the car on. 

The man’s head drops to his chest, “I ain’t gonna tell her till we’re gone.” His voice is quiet and full of pain. Limp hand on the keys, he decides to turn them- their conversation over.

“I think that’s for the best.”

Shane’s head snaps to Lori’s face as the car turns over and roars to life. The look on his face is full of confusion. Why did the women say it like that? Why did she say it like… like she was happy Bella was leaving?

Before he can open his mouth the radio with the car blares to life, “ The emergency alert system has been activated. ” The sound draws others over to the car, “ The Office of Civil Defense has issued the following message: Normal broadcasting will cease immediately. This is a civil emergency .” The man’s voice over the broadcast is flat and robotic.

“Is that a local signal?” Glenn questions out loud.

“It's got to be within 50 miles of here.”

“ Avoid anyone infected at all costs. Remain calm. Help is on the way. The emergency alert system has been activated. ”

Shane huffs and turns the radio off, “Asshole.” Looking up at everyone gathered, the man shoos them away, “Okay, let's get back to work.”

And as the group drifts back to work, the sun continues its descent in the sky and the air sends small chills when the wind blows. No more walkers or herds pass them by as they slowly stop working and gather to have a mix-matched dinner while sitting atop car hoods. 

Carol still stands at the guard rail waiting for her daughter to run out of the woods and into her waiting arms. “It's late. Gonna be dark soon.” She says to the group behind her.

“They'll find her.” Andrea says to the woman before walking towards Dale in a huff. “Where's my gun? You have no right to take it.” Dale looks up to the young woman’s angry face.

“You don't need that just now, do you?” 

“My father gave it to me. It's mine.” She almost spits at him. Bella watches from alongside Carl atop a car’s hood- barley consuming the soup she was given.

Dale, the man he was, looks at Andrea. “I can hold onto it for you.” He offers. He didn’t want to fight with her but the woman that almost committed suicide 24-hours ago wanted a fight.

“Or you can give it back to me.”

Shane drifts over as Andrea’s voice gets louder. “Everything cool?”

“No, I want my gun back.” She sassed, everyone's eyes had drifted over to the group.

Dale shakes his head, “I don't think it's a good idea right now.” The woman’s eyes grow hard. 

Shane looks back at Dale, “Why not?” It was obvious what he was doing, he was using his old cop techniques. Shane and Rick used to do it when her and Carl were younger and they would fight over a toy. They mediate the situation but in the end… they make the final decision.

“I'm not comfortable with it.” Dale stresses in his voice. And everyone knew why.

Shane sighs and places his hands atop his hips, “The truth is, the less guns we have floating around camp the better.” He states- no one is the group besides himself, Rick, Daryl, and Bella knew how to properly use a weapon. 

“You turning over your weapon?”

“No. But I'm trained in its use. That's what the rest of y'all need- proper training.” Shane states with no room for argument. Andrea and anyone else could try but it wouldn’t work- they want to look to him and Rick for leadership then they're gonna deal with what they say or they can leave. “But until that time I think it's best if Dale keeps them all accounted for.”

Andrea raises her brows before pointing to the little girl watching from twenty feet away. “Bella giving Dale hers?" She asks, looking at the man. This woman was trying too hard.

Shane’s patience starts to wear thin. Having a gun didn’t protect you- having a gun and knowing how to use it can protect you… and Andrea didn’t have that knowledge. “Again- unlike the rest of you. She has proper training.” He shoots back at her, “Won’t go shootin off at every creak and russell.”

The blonde woman merely shakes her head and curls her lips in anger before turning away, “Uh-huh.”

The moment Shane had gotten Bella back he cleaned her up, got her into fresh clothes, and strapped the holster and gun he had made for her onto her waist. He should’ve done it before he  let her out of the RV. What if something like that happens again? What if one of these useless and pathetic people put his daughter in danger again? He won’t let it happen.

As the woman stomps away, Bella rolls her eyes at the scene. The woman was thirty years old and she was acting like a child- it was pathetic.

With her thoughts rolling in her mind, Glenn calls out as a filthy Rick and Daryl come dragging themselves up the hill to the highway. Sophia is nowhere to be found.

Carol takes a few steading breaths, “You didn't find her?”

Rick drops in head in sorrow, “The trial we followed wasn’t hers.” He started, “But we doubled back and found another trial- but it went cold. We’ll pick it up at first light.” The trail they found in Bella’s direction wasn’t Sophia's- it was some random walker. But they had found another, one they believed was the lost girl’s.

Carol shakes her head and the control she had slipped away in her voice. “You can't leave my daughter out there on her own to spend the night alone in the woods.”

“Out in the dark's no good. We'd just be tripping over ourselves. More people get lost.” Daryl explains.

“She’s only twelve - she can't be out there on her own.” Carol cries as Lori holds the woman’s shoulders. “You didn't find anything ?” She cries.

“I know this is hard. But I'm asking you not to panic. We know she was out there.”

Daryl nods and steps over the guardrail, “And we tracked her for a while.”

The sheriff nods along with the redneck’s words. “We have to make this an organized effort.” He starts, “Daryl knows the woods better than anybody. I've asked him to oversee this.”

The group nods in understanding- they weren’t going to leave Sohpia. They’d find her.

Carol looks down Rick’s shirt as he crawls over the guardrail, “Is that blood?”

“We took down a walker on her trial.”

“Walker? Oh my God.”

Rick sticks his hands up covered in smudge dried blood. “There was no sign it was ever anywhere near Sophia.”

“How can you know that?” Andrea calls, her voice still sharp.

“We cut the son of a bitch open,” Calls Daryl. “Made sure.” He speaks directly to Carol.

Carol cries as she leans against a car, “Oh God. How could you just leave her out there to begin with?” Her eyes filled with tears, look to Rick, “ How could you just leave her ?”

“Those walkers were on us. I had to draw them off.” He tells her, “It was their best chance.”

Shane sighs next to his daughter who watches with a flat face, “He didn't have a choice, Carol.”

“How is she supposed to find her way back? She’s just a child.”

“It was my only option. The only choice I could make.” Rick’s voice begs her to understand. He was an honorable man with good morals- he wouldn’t leave a child in the woods to fend for themselves.

“I'm sure nobody doubts that.” Shane says in comfort to his brother.

“Because your girl made it back.” Carol spits to the man, “You found her first before Sophia.” She accuses before curling into herself, “My little girl got left in the woods.” 

She cries and cries and cries… her tears falling with stopping even as the sun drops and the sky fills with darkness.

The group prepare themselves for a difficult night of sleep as she cries inside the RV. 

Gathering some blankets, Bella drops them next to the blue SUV her daddy had fixed up. It would be their bed for the night.

“Hey, Bella, could we talk to you for a second?” Rick calls to the young girl as she hands her dad another pillow for their bed in the back of the car. He showed her how to push the back seats down to make more room to sleep.

The young girl nods once Shane gives her the gentle okay. Walking over, Rick and Daryl lead her a small distance away from everyone. The sheriff bends down to the girl’s height, “You didn’t find anything?” Bella questions the pair before either could speak.

Rick merely shakes his head in answer.

Daryl sighs from his spot behind Rick- almost like good cop, bad cop. “The direction you pointed us in-” The redneck starts looking down at the girl. “You sure it was the right one?”

Bella nods simply, “Yes, Mr. Daryl.” The men give the girl a look to continue. “She was dragging me along. Then I tripped and when I looked up she was running off into the woods.” Her explanation is simple and quick.

Rick nods in understanding. “You tripped over a root, right? How didn’t Sophia hear you fall?”

The young girl gives him a weird look- her eyes jump up and down the sheriff's figure quickly, “No, Mr. Grimes. There was a noise.” She states looking at Rick. “And I don’t know- she just left me.” Her shoulders shrug as she readjusts her footing. Dale had shuffled through the meds she had found earlier in the day and handed her some painkillers… with the approval of Shane. But they were starting to wear away. 

Rick gives her a curt smile, “Okay… okay. Thank you.”

Bella smiles back. “Good night, Mr. Grimes. Mr. Daryl.” She calls as she makes her way to her dad who is watching her approach. 

He helps her into the back of the car as Daryl and Rick watch. Shane gives them a goodnight nod before climbing in himself and locking the doors. Rick continues to stare at the car in wonder- his mind turning fast.

Daryl sighs once before readjusting his crossbow. “I ain’t saying she’s lying.” He starts turning to face Rick, shoulder-to-shoulder, “... but those tracks weren’t Sophia’s.”

He leaves Rick to stand alone in the dark.

Chapter Text

Standing in a circle formation, the group listens intently to Rick. A new day had dawned, and everyone was ready to go searching for Sophia's trail. The atmosphere was tense and laced with hope- they could find Sophia… they- Rick- needed to find Sophia.

Laid out in front of them was the roll of machetes Carl and Bella had found. They were clean and sharp, brand new in this fallen world. “Everybody takes a weapon.” Rick’s command sends people to grab at the desired blade. Glenn grasps at a pickaxe/ax looking blade and grows a boyish smile at it.

Andrea from her side of the group, grabs a machete and stares down at it, “These aren't the kind of weapons we need. What about the guns?” She calls the group in hope someone would agree with her.

Shane doesn’t even turn his head in her direction, “We've been over that.” He pauses. “Daryl, Rick and I are carrying. We can't have people popping off rounds every time a tree rustles.” He states as he checks his own weapon before holstering it.

“It's not the trees I'm worried about.” She speaks simply.

Finally, Shane turns his head to the woman, “Say somebody fires at the wrong moment, a herd happens to be passing by. See, then it's game over for all of us.” He spits swiftly- he was tired of this conversation, everyone was. “So, you need to get over it.” He commands her.

She merely gives him an unbelieving look before turning her gaze to the little girl next to his legs, “Bella’s still got a gun.” She comments towards the gun and holster placed back onto the girl’s waist. The baby blue overall dress and pink tee with small bees Bella now wore didn’t fit well with the gun hostler. 

Shane places a hand to the back of her head in a protective cradle, “My daughter knows how to handle a gun.”

“ She’s a child .” Andrea shoots back to the man. She couldn’t understand how no one could see that a child shouldn’t have a weapon over an adult. It was her gun- she should have it.

“I’m not acting like a child.” Bella speaks out.

Another look of disbelief and anger floods Andrea’s face. T-Dog and Glenn had to stifle their laughs at the young girl’s words. Shane, however, tightens the hold on the young girl’s head for a mere moment to tell her to stop. “Bella.” He calls looking down at her with a look in his eyes telling her to stop. “She’s staying here with the RV. Her carrying isn’t any of your concern.” He says to the woman.

“So, if I stayed with the RV, I could keep my gun?”

The little patience Shane had was gone now. Andrea would not stop. She keeps pushing and arguing with no experience or knowledge to back her up. She’s getting on everyone’s nerves and her attitude was going to get someone in trouble.

“If you have a problem with the way things are, you can make up a car for yourself and leave.” Shane says simply. Shock falls onto her face and Shane looks around the group before going back to the woman. “But if you stay, you're following mine and Rick’s rules. This isn’t up for debate .” His words leave no room for argument and Andrea gives a meek nod; the woman put back into her place like a child. Shane has other things to worry about- he had Bella and Carl and Lori, bigger things than some random chick wanting to hold a gun.

The group stands silently with their eyes downcast. No one else wanted to be at the other end of Shane’s lack of patience. After a long moment of silence Daryl takes a step forward to spread out a map. The redneck wasn’t concerned with Shane's anger. “The idea is to take the creek up about five miles, turn around and come back down the other side. Chances are she'll be by the creek. It's her only landmark.” He explains to the group. 

Everyone nods in understanding to the man and mentally prepares themselves for what may come. “Stay quiet and stay sharp. Keep space between you but always stay within sight of each other.” Rick commands, they need this to be organized and contained. They couldn’t risk anyone else getting lost or injured.

Dale walks forward to hand off a pack to Glenn- its insides filled with supplies for the tracking. Shane looks to the older man, “Keep on those repairs. We've got to get this R.V. ready to move.”

“We won't stay here a minute longer than we have to.” He agrees, giving Rick a handshake of good will, “Good luck out there. Bring Sophia back.”

“Keep an eye on Carl while we're gone.”

Carl pulls away from the hand Rick had placed on his back, “I'm going with you. You need people, right? To cover as much ground as possible.”

Rick stares down at his young son and he can see the stubbornness of himself and Lori in the boy’s eyes. He turns to Lori with a questioning gaze, no words needing to be spoken.

The mother tilts her head with a shrug, “Your call. I can't always be the bad guy.” She says looking at her husband.

Rick stands in thought. He didn’t want his son out there, who knows what they were going to come across, and at the RV Carl would have Bella, Dale, and T-Dog with him… and on second thought it would be better if he came with them. Dale would protect the kids, so would T-Dog, but Dale was an old man and T-Dog was injured. 

During the herd, T-Dog had gone to hide and sliced his forearm on the metal of a crashed car. It was the help of Daryl that he survived- if not for the redneck’s quick thinking T-Dog would’ve been eaten alive… the only bad thing is he needs stitches, he needs medicine and there were no antibiotics found.

“Well, he has all of you to look after him. I'd say he's in good hands.” Dale tacks on, giving the young boy a sideways wink. Carl gives the man a smile in thanks.

Rick nods at Carl’s smile and hopeful eyes, “Okay. Okay. But always within our sight, no exceptions.” He commands his son. Carl’s face goes stern in understanding as he gives his father a nod.

“I’m going too if Carl’s going.” Bella calls out from aside Shane.

Shane doesn’t even look up from his backpack. “Not on that ankle.”

Bella rolls her eyes and jumps on the injured ankle, “It doesn’t hurt- I’m going.” Her words leave no room for argument as she skips over to the blue SUV and grabs a bag from within.

Shane merely stared at the girl as she skipped away and took a deep sigh. He really needs to learn to tell the girl no. But today isn’t that day. And truthfully… he didn’t want to leave her behind- not with Dale or T-Dog.

So here they now were, creeping through the woods behind Daryl and Rick. Daryl was at the head of the pack as he led them farther along the trail. Everyone is tense in the woods, had it not been for the situation it would be beautiful. The woods are bright green, full of life and growth, there are small sounds from little woodland creatures echoing from within.

But now… those noises… the full of life forest- it did nothing but cause fear. Like death was creeping behind every corner waiting for someone to find him. Creaking and cracking branches as he followed around the group as they drew deeper into the woods.

At the back of the silent group Shane and Bella walk side-by-side with Carl slowing down to join them. “Shane, look!” The boy cheers as he holds up a small pocketknife, the blade exposed to the air. “Dad said I could carry it and mom said as long as I was-” His words are cut off as Shane turns to walk backwards, his eyes scanning the woods.

“Keep it down. We're looking for Sophia. You need to focus on the task.”

The smile Carl wore was once again wiped away from his face. With his eyes downcast, Lori grabs to pull him gently away.

The mother and son walk ahead, and Shane turns to walk normally again. But his steps slow when he realizes Bella isn’t keeping pace. Turning his head in concern Shane is met with Bella’s angry eyes. What happened to make her so mad?

And before he can speak, Bella’s arm whips around to smack him harshly on his chest. The father jumps back slightly from the girl’s hit and stares down in shock, “Bell-” He starts the shock bleeding into anger. How dare she hit him like that? And unwarranted too. 

Bella raises a single finger to her father, a silent promise to him and everyone left in the world, whether they could hear it or not. “Don’t ever talk to him like that again.” She says before leaving the man behind to stare at her back.

Bella moves swiftly towards Carl. She takes his arm interlocked with her own and draws him forward. Lori stands still as they leave- she needs to speak with the man behind them.

Bella’s steps are more energetic than Carl’s- the boy drags his feet. “Ignore him. He can get really serious sometimes.” Bella tells her friend as they hurdle step over a rather large fallen tree trunk.

“Yeah, that’s what mom said.” Carl’s words are saddened. He likes Shane but the man… he was being so cold.

Bella shakes at the boy’s arm when he continues his moping. “Carl- I mean it.” The boy looks towards his friend as she continues. “Ignore him. He’s… scared.”

Carl huffs a distrustful laugh, “Shane scared?” Bella gives him a smile and a swift nod. “That’s not possible.” Carl states, as if he was saying the sky was blue. Shane didn’t get scared… never. He has and always will be calm, cool, and collected. 

Bella hums in thought, “Worried?” She offers instead. Shane being worried was more believable than scared.

Carl nods in agreement as the group comes across a tent. 

But there's no sign of Sophia within. 

Only the corpse of a man that opted out… just like Jenner did. The group drops at the knowledge… they were back to square one, there was no sign of the girl.

With a sigh, Rick turns to command the group-

DING!-DING!-DING!

Everyone jumps at the sound of bells. Why the hell were there bells echoing in the woods? Why were bells even ringing?

“What direction?” Shane calls out as the group turns their heads all around.

The group shoots back comments of the bells. Where they are- who’s ringing them… maybe it was Sophia ringing them. Pointing in a direction, Rick leads the group towards the bells. Sticking close together the group runs and runs, then stops and listens, then runs again. The Atlanta heat beats harshly against them even under the treetops. 

Bursting through a wall of brush, the group is met with the sight of open land dotted with headstone and centered within a small building. It was visibly a church, but it had no bell tower. They were at the wrong place.

“That can't be it. Got no steeple, no bells.” Shane speaks into the air- facing reality. But Rick continues forward through the graves- the air is quiet.

Gathered at the front steps the ground readies their weapons. The men would be the ones to face any walkers or threats. 

In their fighting stances, Rick counts down from three before he and Shane knock through the church’s double doors, Daryl and Glenn following behind. Bella watches from the doorway as the men round on the five walkers within. 

The corpses sit down in the church, facing the cross as though they were praying. Bella hadn’t seen many walkers but this… this was weird. Walkers weren’t alive. So why are they acting like it?

Each of the men round on their own walker, blade piercing their skulls easily. The fifth is an old woman with a black lace dress hat covering her eyes. She turns between Daryl and Rick who stand on both sides of her, but she is put down swiftly.

Bella and Carl watch in interest as the men move- as though they’ve been doing this their entire lives

“Sophia!” Daryl screams. Walking sideways to the cross where Jesus hangs, Daryl looks at him in scorn, “Yo, J.C., you taking requests?”

Everyone looks around- there’s no sign of anything living or dead. Shane goes up to Rick as he looks around, “I'm telling you, it's the wrong church. It's got no steeple, Rick. There's no steeple.” The air was quiet as he spoke, but it was now filled with bells.

The sound is louder than they’ve heard, it surrounds them and the building. Feet rush outside to the source of the noise, a speaker attached to the siding. Glenn is the first to reach the control box it leads to, and the cords are ripped apart. “A timer. It's on a timer.” He says to everyone. 

The silence in the air is heavier than anyone can handle. “I'm gonna… go back in for a bit.” Carol says before stumbling gently towards the church. Her little girl wasn’t there… they didn’t find her. Her heart couldn’t handle it.

Breaking apart everyone stays close but bleeds off into their own spaces. They need a break after everything, and this is as good of a place as any.

Bella stands off to the side watching Carl walk in the church alongside Rick. The boy was sad- it confused Bella more than she could explain. She was here, why was he sad? 

With a gentle sigh, she rests against the siding of the church’s wall sinking to rest on her heels. Her mind races with thoughts as she picks at her fingers trying to understand them. This place wasn’t safe, but Bella found peace in the silence.

“Are you really leaving?” Lori’s voice comes in a whisper.

Shane puts his hands to his hips, “Don't you think it's best for all of us?” The pair stands away from the building talking in quiet voices. Sweat dripping from their skin under the blaze of the sun and the conversation they're in.

Lori nods in conformation, “I think it is. What made you decide?” She asks simply.

The man drops his head in pain. This decision… It hurt so much more than anyone could understand. He… he loves Lori. He loves Carl. He loves Bella. And Bella loves Carl. He’s not only destroying his relationships but his little girl’s. But it would be for the best- Bella would grow out of it. She’s a strong girl, she could do it. 

“Gotta back away. Just trying to be the good guy here, Lori, even if you don't see it.” The man pauses to look at Lori. “None of this was intended. I hope you know that.” He breaks eye contact and backs a step away. “Well, it doesn't matter. As long as I said it.” His decision was made. Lori wants him gone- he’ll leave.

But the response she gives doesn’t seem to support the man’s final decision. "You're just gonna disappear? You're not even gonna tell Rick?” She questions. Shane looks at Lori in confusion. She wants him gone but she’s finding things to make him stay. “What about Bella? You're really just gonna take her away without saying anything?” She pushes him.

“Rick will only try to stop me.” Shane states the obvious between them. “You tell him what you want. Or tell him nothing at all. You're his wife. ” The reality settles between the two of them. Lori was married to Rick. Rick was Shane's best friend, his brother. And Shane and Lori got together when they thought Rick was dead. The parents… they needed comfort, one they couldn’t and wouldn’t find with their children… and now- now they couldn’t stop drawing to each other. No matter how much Lori wanted to stop. “And Bella’s my girl, I’ll worry about that as it comes.” He speaks.

“ And Carl? ” She struggles out with a held back cry. “We dragged him into this.”

“I love Carl.”

“He thinks you hate him.”

“I'm trying to put some distance. I'm trying to make this easier.” He speaks.

“We did this to Carl and Bella.” Lori pushes as if he didn’t understand what they did.

Shane looks down at the woman, “You think I wanna do this? Break their friendship?” He asks, looking down at her with questioning eyes.

And it’s when Lori looks into his eyes that she pulls back- seeing something in them. “It will be for the best. They’ll get through it.” Her tone and body changes with the words.

Shane gives her a look. They could lie all they want but the two of them won’t get through it. “They’ve been attached to the goddamn hip since birth, this ain’t gonna be easy on them.” He tells her. “This ain't easy on any of us, least of all me. I'm the one who loses you .” He struggles out the last sentence looking at the woman.

She merely gives him a tight smile before walking away and into the church. Shane watches her leave for a moment before the crunch of a branch sounds opposite the doors. “I'm coming with you.” Andrea says from his left. 

“I don't know what the hell you're talking about.” The man says going stone cold and walking forward.

Andrea jogs alongside him. “I'm not stupid and I'm certainly not deaf. Look, I don't know the story-”

“There is no story.”

The blonde woman throws her hands up, “Fine, I don't care. Don't confuse me with someone who does. Look, all I care about is getting out of here as far away as I can, like you.” She stops him in his place as she speaks, breath escaping her quickly.

Shane huffs a laugh looking at her, “We're gonna sail off into the sunset together? We gonna hold hands?”

She rolls her eyes at his tone.  “I'm not asking you to go steady, Shane. I'm asking for a ride, a chance to start over somewhere else.” She looks to the church for a moment, “You observe this group lately? I have. I see two people who don't belong. We're the odd men out . Between the two of us, we make a great third wheel.” They were the odd men out- the black sheep. But Shane isn’t gonna run away with some chick when he has other priorities. 

“So what? Say we do, we just run off. What's in it for me except for the extra ass I got to cover?”

“The chance to do something for someone else.” Shane rolls his eyes so hard only the whites can be seen. “And a door that swings both ways. Put a gun in my hand, I'll cover your ass too.” And back to the issue of guns. Andrea raises her chin at the man as Bella stands from the side of the house and approaches slowly. “You told me if I ain’t happy to pack a car and leave.” She shoots back to the man. “Think it over.” Her words are the mixture of begging and commanding.

Drifting alongside Shane, Bella comes to a stop. No words are shared as he leads her towards the church’s stairs. But the young girl doesn’t feel like going inside and opts to look through the closest graves. 

Her eyes drift over the clean kept gravestones. Deep engravings line each. They were old, probably older than the girl herself, but they were cared for. It’s too bad they won’t be anymore. 

Kneeling to the ground as Shane begins speaking to Rick about what to do next, Bella pulls her sketch book from her bag. She hadn’t touched it since the herd passed through the highway camp. 

The pages are cracked open under her fingers. Blood, human or walker, had encrusted the upper corner of the pages. The caked on blood flakes off as she picks at it. She made sure her daddy didn’t see her take it back from the trash pile. It had all of her best drawings in it, it would be a shame to let it burn.

Finding her next clean page, she grabs her black crayon and strips it of its wrapper. And she begins to line up her pages with the gravestone. Dragging the crayon's body across the paper, the engravings of the head stone are formed on the bloodstained paper.

‘A Soul That Only Comes Once Every 

Hundred Decades

As Terrifying As It Is Beautiful And Holy’

Bella looks down at the words, her thoughts turning over them. What beautiful words wasted on a gravestone.

“Y'all gonna follow the Creek Bed back, okay? Daryl, you're in charge.” Shane voices out forcing Bella to hide away the sketch book in her hands. “Me and Rick, we're just gonna hang back, search this area another hour or so just to be thorough.” He continues as Bella pushes underneath his hand like a dog wanting to be touched.

The redneck rests against his crossbow. “You're splitting us up. You sure?”

Shane nods, “Yeah, we'll catch up to you.”

“I want to stay too.” Carl’s voice calls- everyone’s eyes find him. “I'm her friend.”

Lori licks her lips before touching Carl’s hair, “Just be careful, okay?” She doesn’t want to leave him- everyone can see it in her eyes… but she gave in easily.

“I will.”

Lori smiles and smooches Carl’s hair, “When did you start growing up?”

Rick watches the interaction with a gentle smile. “I'll be along soon enough.” Reaching back he pulls out his large Revolver. “Here, take this. Remember how to use it?”

Lori nods but doesn’t move for the large weapon. “I'm not taking your gun and leaving you unarmed.” 

Andrea watches with hatred as Daryl pulls a small gun from his back handing it off to the woman. A gun that matches her stature much better than Rick’s. “Here, got a spare. Take it.”

The group separates to part ways and Bella doesn’t move to follow Daryl’s group. “You staying, Princess?” Her father asks, looking down. A simple nod is all he gets before she finds her place alongside Carl and the group separates into smaller pieces.

Bella, Shane, and Carl watch as Rick drifts in the church for a moment to himself. He needed a moment- he hadn’t gotten one since he woke up in that hospital not even a week ago.

The children rest against the stairs in silence, their shoulders touching each other in security. This place… it was unsettling in Carl gut. The land was clean and up-kepted, someone had put in the effort to continue tending to it. But underneath their feet were corpses that could very well be trying to dig their way out of their coffins.

Herds of corpses could drift out of the surrounding forest any moment. It doesn’t matter how beautiful and peaceful it may seem… death was lurking.

And it was so close. Nipping at their heels. Forcing them to run faster and faster. This is the first moment they’ve had to breathe.

But it still wasn’t enough.

Rick draws out of the church and down its steps. The trio on the steps follow behind the stiff sheriff as he leads them towards the opposite end of the land.

Carl and Bella walk between the two men as they look through the untouched forest. It was hard to keep their bearings within. The forest looks similar with every twist and turn they take.

The group is silent as they move, listening for anything in the air. 

And their silence grants them a gift.

Turning into a very small opening, they are met with the sight of a lone deer eating at a small bush that flourishes within the sunlight that comes through the opening in the tree tops. The kids share a quick look, smiles bright on their faces as they slowly take steps forward.

The deer hasn’t noticed them yet. Its body is full of strength with a fur coat that shines under the sun in a golden brown. The white of its small tail rises and and falls in time with the twitching of its ears. It must hear them… and not consider them a threat.

Behind the pair comes Rick's small reprimand to Shane who has his gun raised. Turning his back, he sees the smiles on the pair’s faces. He drops the barrel and drifts back alongside Rick- the fathers track the kids as they slowly approach, smiles adorned on their faces.

Getting closer to the animal, its head picks up to stare at the kids. They offer the animal a gentle smile.

It was beautiful.

No one was scared. The air is calm and gentle. Birds sing in the air as the sun warms everyone’s skin. 

Bella takes another step forward, Carl drawing behind her to follow. They both want to touch the animal, its presence is inviting, as though she was waiting for them to find her in the opening.

Only ten feet away from the creature, Carl looks over Bella’s right shoulder, his body peaking out from behind her. The boy was intrigued but more careful than his friend- she was impulsive compared to him.

The deer raises its head higher as they are now a few steps away. It doesn’t run, the deer merely stares into the kids eyes. The creatures' dark orbs are like portals- if they continue to stare maybe they could escape this reality. How badly they would love to escape this reality.

Holding each other's hand, Bella looks back to Carl- they were going to touch the deer. With a smile Bella questions Carl, “Do you want to to-”

The silence is split and exploded with the sound of a single gun shot. Carl watches as the deer is struck and Bella…

Bella watches as Carl is thrown back to the ground and blood begins to pool from his stomach.

Time stops as Bella drops to her knees alongside Carl, hands touching the blood without thought. She doesn’t notice Rick or Shane rushing to their side nor her screaming.

All she sees is the blood that bubbles out of Carl’s skin and sinks into her own.

Chapter Text

Running and running and running. 

It’s all they’re doing. They can barely breathe… but it doesn’t matter. They need to keep running. They need to.

The blood wet clothes sticking to their skin doesn’t matter. The heat of the sun that beats onto them in the open field doesn’t matter. The shouting from Shane to the large stranger that shot Carl doesn’t matter. 

It doesn’t. 

Cause Carl is dying and they aren’t running fast enough. 

The boy lays limp within his father’s tight embrace. His blood spilling onto the sheriff shirt and down. He’s losing so much blood.

Bella doesn’t hear anything; not her father’s shouts and not the questions of the strangers that stand on the front porch of the farm house they race towards. 

Rick must tell the old man, standing protective in front of the house and the other strangers, what happened because they let the trio through with no problem. 

The larger group races towards a bedroom where the old gray man rips the blankets off a large bed. 

Rick places Carl down with gentle care… the man in a trance as he watches the life leave Carl. 

Bella is stuck in a trance as well but she moves to place her hands atop Carl’s bubbling wound… but it’s no use as the blood seeps between the girl’s small hands. She doesn’t even notice the tear drops that fall and mingle with the blood.

“Pillowcase.”

Rick stutters where he stands, “Is-is he alive?”

“Pillowcase, quick.” The old man commands once again.

Rick struggles to move his limbs so Bella grabs at the pillow by her side, one Carl’s head isn’t resting on. “Is-is he alive?” The father cries out in a whisper.

“Fold it- Make a pad. Put pressure back on the wound.” The man commands the girl that messily folds the pillowcase and presses it back onto Carl’s stomach. The man- Doctor, supposedly, grabs a stethoscope and places it against Carl's arm,  “I've got a heartbeat- It's faint.”

“I got it- Step back.” A middle aged woman says to Rick, pushing him away from the bed and Carl.

“Maggie, IV.”

The young woman, Maggie, moves forward with a bag of liquids, “We need some space.” She says towards both the man and young girl. Rick steps back but Bella remains hovering over Carl, as though she was blocking the light Carl’s soul was looking towards.

“Your name?” The old man says.

“R-Rick.”

“Rick?”

He nods, “I'm-I'm-I'm Rick.” He struggles out of his mouth.

The doctor nods and stands facing the man, “Rick, we're gonna do everything we can, okay? You need to give us some room. Now.” He moves away without another word- the boy needs attention now, he doesn't have time to speak with the father.

And Rick drifts out of the room and out the front door of the house, coming face to face with Shane and the stranger.

Bella remains atop the bed, staring down at Carl. How could this have happened? She was in front of him- she should be the one in the bed. Not him. Never him. What kind of person lets their best friend get shot? 

It was her fault. 

She knew it. She didn’t need her dad or Rick or the stranger-

No.

No. No. No.

It wasn’t her fault… 

It was his. The strangers.

That fat, pathetic, disgusting man. 

‘Hunting a buck’? He shot Carl!

He shot him. He shot her best friend. He shot Carl. He-

He may have killed Carl.

Carl might die… and it's his fault. 

If Carl dies… Carl might die.

What is she supposed to do? She doesn’t know what to do. ‘Keep pressure on a bleeding wound’. That’s what she’s doing. It’s what she’s doing and it isn’t working. Carl’s still bleeding- the blood is still coming, soaking the pillow case she has pressed hard against his stomach.

They promised they wouldn’t leave each other… but here they were- drifting away.

“She won’t move.” Maggie whispers behind Bella. The ringing within the girl’s ears is quiet as she comes back to the world. Heart still pounds and she is terrified to look away but she can hear now. The voices weren’t under water anymore.

The old man walks over to the bed opposite Bella. He pulls over a chair to sit in. “What’s your name, dear?” He questions the girl that kneels like a statue. Maggie and the man share a look, “Your brother is going to be fine.” He says.

“He’s not my brother.” Her voice is scratchy and painful.

The man nods and sends another look to Maggie, “Your friend?” Bella gives a small nod. “We’re gonna do everything we can to help him- but I need you to move.” 

But she doesn’t move. She just keeps the pillowcase pressed down.

She barely notices the shrug he sends the young woman in the room but she hears the sounds. The tinkering and clanking of metal instruments. A silver pan comes into view with a few tools.

“Hunny, you don’t wanna see this-'' Maggie comes over to touch the girl’s shoulder but she flinches so violently it's as though she was shot too.

They don’t know what to do, she won’t move. “Would you like to help us?” The doctor asks, causing Maggie to send him a bewildered look and Bella to raise her head. Her eyes finally leave Carl’s body to meet the old man’s. “Hold his legs down. He’s gonna be in pain but we need to get the bullets out.” He explains and Bella nods, dropping her gaze quickly back to Carl. 

She shimmies over to Carl’s legs, a hand on each knee pressing down to the bed.

The man speaks to Maggie; six bullet pieces, clean, and stitch, he tells her. That was their plan. The ‘hopefully this works’ was barely concealed in his words, or on their faces.

Bella watches as the doctor pulls the bloody pillowcase away from Carl’s stomach, blood immediately fills the pocket carved into the skin. And insert the shiny look-a-like tweezers underneath the skin. 

The man digs carefully for the bullets inside the flesh, the poke of the instrument showing through Carl’s pale white skin.

The room is silent besides the squelching of flesh and blood as the man tries to capture the closet bullet fragment. 

And as the tweezers squeeze down on the foreign object, Carl’s eyes snap open with tears dropping down his cheeks and blood pooling faster out his stomach.

Bella’s eyes go wide at the sight; Carl withering on the bed- trying to pull away from the pain, the blood pouring out his body, and the man trying to help but only making it worse.

He was making it worse and he needs to stop. He needs to stop now!

And the hand of her father stops her from shouting out… from lunging at the man. “I got him.” Shane calls out as he grabs at Carl’s shoulders pushing him into one place.

Even as the boy cries and begs for his dad, for his mom, for Bella… he was scared and everything hurt and why won’t they let him move?

The doctor twists the tweezers as Carl screams louder, his voice shaking the walls of the farm house. “Almost there.” He comments.

Carl screams and cries so loud it hurts. “Stop- You're killin' him!” Rick screams at the doctor, begging.

 “Rick! Do you want him to live?!”

The older woman grabs Rick’s arm, “He needs blood!” He moves willingly as she pushes the needle into his arm for the lifeline Carl needs.

“Do it now!” Shane screams as Carl continues to fight against their hold. The boy’s dying body was stronger than anyone could understand. And all at once his cries stop along with the struggling. “Wait-wait, hey.” Shane pulls back and looks between the doctor and everyone in the room.

“He just passed out.” The doctor says as he finally pulls out the tweezers, a small string of flesh follows before snapping away, only the bullet fragment remains. “One down… five to go.” He drops the piece into the metal tray and it rings loud in the room.

Bella sits defeated at Carl’s feet as the doctor, Hershel she learns, cleans up Carl the best he could. Shane and Rick continue back-and-forth, the young girl only picks up a few words until she turns her head.

“Lori needs to be here. She doesn't even know what's goin' on.” Rick says from the corner of the room, elbows on his knees bent over in agony. “I got-I gotta go find her, bring her back.”

Hershel looks up from his task cleaning his instruments to say, “You can't do that.”

“She's his mother!” The father… he couldn’t do this. Not alone. He needs his wife. “She needs to know what's happened. Her son's lying here, shot.”

“And he's going to need more blood.” Hershel shoots back easily. Bella fully looks at the man- he was older, sixty or seventy, with a gently worn face that was adorned with a white beard and hair that was beginning to recede. The man looks to Shane that leans against a window seal, “He can't go more than 50 feet from this bed.” 

“He can have mine.” Bella says from the bed without thought.

Her daddy immediately begins shaking his head, “No, Bella-”

She turns to face her dad, her thigh touching Carl’s foot in security- she couldn’t say if it was for her or the boy. “Jenner said I’m O positive. Carl can have mine.” She states looking at Hershel for confirmation that she was right. Carl could have her blood.

She could help her friend… She could save Carl. Why wouldn’t she want to do that? Why would her daddy and Mr. Grimes, not want her to help Carl?

Rick shakes his head in exhaustion, “No, Bella. I won’t let you do that.”

“He needs blood!” She shouts back looking at the boy paler than the sheets he lays on. Don’t they want Carl to live?

Hershel takes a step forward pulling the young girl’s attention. He could see her getting worked up. “You could get sick, you both don’t need to be in that bed.”

“But he’ll die!”

“Bella, enough!” Shane shouts standing up fully, “Rick isn’t going anywhere, he’ll be able to give Carl all the blood he needs.” He says it in finalization, for her and Rick. Bella drops her gaze back to Carl. “You're not going anywhere.” He says to Rick.

“Lori has to be here, Shane- She has to know.”

Shane nods as he bends down at Rick’s knees. “Okay, I get that. I'm gonna handle it. But you've gotta handle your end.” His tone changes as he speaks.

“My-my end?”

“Your end is being here, for your son. Even if he didn't need your blood to survive, there is no way I'd ever let you walk out that door.” Shane looks up at his brother. “Man, I-I'd break your legs if you tried. I mean, you know that, right?” He half-heartly jokes. “If something happened to him and you weren't here…” There’s a pause, “If-if he slipped away while you were gone, you would never forgive yourself for that, and neither would Lori, man.”

Rick nods, “You're right.”

Shane grins up at Rick, “When was I ever wrong?” Rick needs to stay strong, he needs to… for all of them. “You know, when.. When you were in that hospital, the one you were never supposed to leave, man.. You should've seen Lori. She was like- the strength of that woman… You can't imagine it.” His eyes hold admiration before focusing back onto Rick. “See-see, that's what you gotta have now. I mean, Carl, he needs that from you. So, you wire yourself tight, my friend. Hmm? You hear? You've got the hard part. You just leave the rest to me, okay?”

A moment passes between the men as they sit in silent embrace; they have faced so many things together… but this… this was something so much more.

Approaching from the other end of the room, Hershel pulls everyone’s gaze as other strangers enter the room. “He's out of danger for the moment, but I need to remove those remaining fragments.”

Rick looks up, “How? You saw how he was.”

The doctor nods gently, “I know, and that was the shallowest one. I need to go deeper to get the others.” The fathers and Bella take the truth hard. “There's more.”

“Tell me.”

“His belly is distended, his pressure's dropping, which means there's internal bleeding.” Everyone looks at the man, “A fragment must have nicked one of the blood vessels. I have to open him up, find the bleeder and stitch it. And he can't move while I'm in there.” His voice becomes even more serious, “I mean at all. If he reacts the same as before, I'll sever an artery and he'll be dead in minutes.” Bella's chest pulls in pain. “To even try this, I have to put him under. But if I do, he won't be able to breathe on his own. Same bad results.”

Rick rubs his hands down his face, fingertips digging into the corners of his eyes. “What'll it take?”

The pathetic man who shot Carl steps forward, “You need a respirator. What else?” He questions.

“The tube that goes with it, extra surgical supplies, drapes, sutures.”

Rick looks at Hershel, “If you had all that, you could save him?” He tries to hold back the hope in his voice, as though the universe would hear and take Carl.

“If I had all that, I could try .”

The shooter looks at Hershel, “Nearest hospital went up in flames a month ago.” He states. That was where they would find everything they needed. His eyes widen in realization, “The high school.” He says.

Hershel nods in agreement, “That's what I was thinkin'. They set up a FEMA shelter there. They would have everything we need.” He tells Shane who nods in understanding.

“The place was overrun last time I saw it.” The shooter says, “You couldn't get near it- Maybe it's better now.”

Shane sighs against the wall, “I said, leave the rest to me. Is it too late to take that back?” He joked towards Rick, strained.

“I hate you goin' alone.”

Shane shrugs it off; he was willing to do this for Carl, for Bella, for Lori, for Rick.  “Come on. Doc, why don't you do me a list, draw me a map.”

“You won't need a map-” The shooter says looking at Shane. “I'll take you there. Ain't but five miles.”

The older woman steps forward, “Otis, no.”

The shooter, Otis , looks at the woman. “Honey, we don't have time for guesswork and I'm responsible.” Bella looks at the man and her daddy- she didn’t want him going with her daddy. He’ll probably shoot him too. “I ain't gonna sit here while this fella takes this on alone. I'll be alright.”

“Are you sure about this?” Shane asks.

“Do you even know what any of the stuff he's talking about looks like?”

“Come to think, no.”

“I've been a volunteer EMT. I do.” Otis says standing taller. “Now, we can talk about this 'till next Sunday, or we could just go do it real quick.”

“I'll take right quick.”

Rick stands with a slight wobble, “I should thank you.”

Otis looks sadly at Rick, he was truly sorry for what happened. “Wait 'till that boy of yours is up and around, then we'll talk. I'll gather some things.”

It only took five minutes for Otis and Shane to pack their things and get a truck pulled to the front of the house. Bella watches from Rick’s side as Shane throws empty duffles into the open bed of the truck.

Shane comes up as Otis says goodbye to his wife, Patrica. “Just get what you need and get out of there.” Rick says, grabbing at his brother’s arm.

“You stay strong, all right?” He gives in response. Rick needs to stay strong.

Otis drifts towards the trio and Rick pulls out his large silver revolver. He twists the handle to the man, “That's a fine weapon, Rick. I'll bring it back in good shape.” Otis says as he grips at the weapons and looks down at it. He turns to go to the vehicle with nothing else to say.

Bending down, Shane gives a side eye to the shooter as he leaves, “I’ll be back soon, Princess.” Bella had left Carl’s side for a mere moment, for this moment and she didn’t feel anything but fear and displacement. “Hey- I’ll be back in one piece… with everything Carl needs.” Her dad grabs at her cheeks in a gentle cradle.

Bella smiles in pain and hugs tight at his neck, “I love you, daddy.” She whispers into his neck. She needs him to come back… to come back in one piece with everything Carl needs. She needs it.

Her dad pulls back, “I love you too, Princess.” He drops a single kiss to her forehead before turning and leaving, dropping himself in the passenger seat.

Bella watches the truck lights go dim as they drift farther down the dirt road. And once they’re gone she runs back into the home, the adults following behind her.

Darting through the home she makes it into Carl’s room. Gently as though she would- or even could- wake Carl, she climbs atop the bed and sits near his stomach.

Carl… he was so pale. So lifeless and cold. She could barely feel his heartbeat under her fingers. 

She can’t leave his side. If she leaves, he’ll be in danger. He could die. But her clothes… her clothes are filthy and her side was starting to hurt.

But- no. No. It doesn’t matter. Carl’s in pain, he’s dying. Her clothes and the pain- it means nothing .

She won’t let it mean anything.

She’ll sit at Carl’s side till she’s old and gray… that’s what friends do. They stay together.

What else is she supposed to do? She doesn’t know what else to do.

She doesn't know even as the hatred boils in her chest. She doesn’t know as Rick comes in to give Carl more blood. She doesn't know as Lori comes bursting into the room and cries for her son. 

She doesn’t know what to do. 

She just looks down at Carl as tears drip down her face. All she knows is the pain in her chest and the one blooming on her side.

All she knows is that everything is fracturing once more…

And she doesn’t know how to stop it.

Chapter Text

Darkness has tinged the sky. Night falling on the farmhouse. And inside Bella lies by Carl’s side.

Curled on her right side, she stares intently at Carl’s unmoving face. Both bodies are so small on the bed, a pale boy and a blood-stained girl together like yin and yang.

A shocking scene.

Lori had arrived a while ago- tears falling the moment her eyes found Carl on the bed, her baby boy broken and bloody in a broken and bloody world.

But now, Lori and Rick are outside under the blanket of darkness and Bella lays with Carl. The house is quiet besides the gently creaking from bodies moving within. But here… inside the farmhouse bedroom- the two children rest in a buzz of silence and in the warmth of candle flames around the room.

“You're gonna be okay, Carl.” The young girl whispers next to her friend's face. She wiggles slightly closer to the boy, “Daddy’s gonna be back really soon then Mr. Hershel is gonna fix you up.” Her hands play gently with Carl’s cold one. He hasn’t moved since Hershel removed the first piece of the bullet and she just wanted him to move. “We promised not to leave each other, remember? … You gotta stay here with me.” Her gaze watches for a movement from Carl… for anything. “You’re not allowed to leave me Carl, you promised me- you promised we’d stay together no matter what.” Bella’s voice cracks painfully in her whisper. All the tears she shed before were wasted fakes… and she hates herself for it- wasting her tears on just anyone. “I won’t let you leave me, Carl.” She barries her face into the comfort of her friend's shoulder and relaxes with the feeling of Carl’s shallow breaths.

The house quiets in the darkness and Bella can feel the eyes of someone watching her. Raising her head from its place on Carl’s shoulder, she looks behind her… but there’s no one. It’s only Bella and Carl in the room but she doesn’t feel alone.

She can almost hear the footsteps creak on the floor of the invisible figure as it makes its way around towards Carl.

There’s no one there, but why doesn’t she believe it?

Sitting up tall, she goes quiet waiting for another noise. There’s nothing, no sound inside, no noise from the outside… it’s just her. The footsteps had stopped, and the weight of the invisible presence sinks onto her chest. The girl’s heart starts to beat painfully as she stares towards the end of the bed into nothing… almost nothing.

Because there’s something there.

It’s dark. Like a shadow in the darkness.

And it’s starring.

Its eyes stuck on Carl’s body. It won’t look at her. Why won’t it look at her?

Pushing to her knees, Bella goes to shout. Cough! Cough! Snapping down to the bed, Carl looks at the girl- and she can’t stop her smile. But the blood that begins to pool onto the bed from the boy’s stomach, does.

Eyes wide, Bella pushes down on the boy’s stomach, but it doesn’t stop. The blood seeps down and crawls up her arms as Carl looks at her- his face contorted into a silent scream of agonizing pain. The figure draws closer over her shoulder- hovering above the pair.

And she feels herself scream and scream and the hands pulling her shoulders back.

Eyes snapping open, Bella tearily looks up to Rick. His hands hold fast to her shoulders, and she lays back on the bed. Head turning, she spots Carl- a clean, relatively safe, not bleeding Carl.

“You fell asleep,” Rick tells the girl as she drops her shoulders. That thing … its gone. It was a dream. It was just a dream. “Honey, are you okay?” The husband-and-wife stare down at the young girl, a terrified child that they couldn’t help. 

Bella nods slowly as she moves towards the edge, her feet dropping towards the floor. In her chest she’s scared to put her feet down, it's not here anymore but it's watching… she knows it is. 

“Bella, sweetie-” Lori holds a damp towel in her hands, “You need to clean yourself up.” 

She reaches gently for the towel and stares down at it unmoving. The towel wouldn’t be enough.

Rick’s hands haven’t left the young girl, a comforting anchor. “Bella, could you give us a moment with Carl?... Please?” The question causes the girl to tighten her shoulders and turn towards the boy- he hadn’t moved. “He’ll be fine.” She doesn’t want to leave; it is obvious on her face, but Rick helps her stand and leads her to the door without much struggle.

With a final look to the bed Bella turns and slowly walks out the door. Rick leaves the door open but leaves it with a small crack- they need a moment alone.

But Bella doesn’t notice as the walls start closing on her. 

She doesn’t notice her feet bringing her outside into the darkness. That thing can’t find her here… right? Not in the darkness.

The screen door to the house snaps close, Bella jumping in her skin.

The young woman, Maggie, makes her way out and Bella finally gets a good look at her. “Here, sweetie.” The woman is pretty with nice shoulder length brown hair that turns caramel in the porch lights. She hands over a mug with a deep chocolate color, marshmallows dotted on the surface. “Hot chocolate. Thought you could use something warm.” Bella gives the woman a small smile and places that damp rag on the arm rest of the porch’s hanging chair.

Bella sits down with Maggie leaning against the railing opposite the young girl. Trying to steady her hands, she takes a careful sip. “Thank you, Miss Maggie.” Realizing it’s not too hot, she takes a larger sip. “It’s good.” She comments.

Maggie smiles with a gentle nod. She must be about Glenn’s age- early twenties or so. “Good- it was the last bit we had.” Bella gives her a look, “No one else drinks it- better you have it then it goin’ to waste.” The southern accent on her tongue is noticeable as she talks but she carries it with grace.

Bella nods and takes another small sip before setting the cup at her side and grabbing the rough hand towel. The woman is quiet as she watches the young girl badly clean her hands. The blood was deep in her nail beds and trailed up her arms- she would need a shower and new clothes; the towel won’t do anything.

Maggie watches the girl carefully. She was detached, rubbing her skin hard. “Carl’s going to be fine.” She speaks into the air.

“I know.” The young girl responds with her eyes still unfocused.

The woman places her cup of coffee to the side and leans slightly closer to the girl. “How’s that?” She invites.

“I just do.” The little girl finally raises her head.

Maggie nods and questions, “Have you been praying?”

“No.” Bella responds immediately. Her eyes sharply focus on Maggie, the woman stares back. “God put Carl into that bed- he’s not going to hear me beg.” The woman leans back from the girl with the strength of her words. “I’ll make sure Carl is alright myself.” 

Maggie nods at the girl. Not everyone was religious but this girl… it took Maggie by surprise how certain she was. “Well… he has a good friend looking after him.”

Bella drops her gaze once Maggie turns hers away. Grabbing her mug, she finishes her hot chocolate as lights form on the dirt road.

The young girl gets excited but quickly knows it's not her dad- the light is a different color.

“Friends of yours?”

Bella nods to Maggie's question. Together they watch the car come to a stop and the two men exit. T-Dog and Glenn make their way up the stairs and to the door. 

It’s obvious they haven’t seen the pair in the darkness.

“So do we ring the bell? I mean it looks like people live here.” Glenn asks, looking at T-Dog.

The man gives him a look as he holds tightly as the elbow of his right arm, “We're past this kind of stuff, aren't we? Having to be considerate.”

Before they can open the door Maggie speaks, “Did you close the gate up the road when you drove in?”

Jumping slightly, the men look over to see Maggie, “Uh, hi.” Glenn starts, “Yes, we closed it. Did the latch and everything.” Maggie gives them a thankful nod. “Hello. Nice to see you again. We met briefly before.” T-Dog and Glenn move their gaze as Bella comes into view. Their eyes go wide at the sight. “Bella? Are you okay?” The girl gives a small nod with the bloody towel in her hands. “We came to help. Is there anything we can do?”

Maggie goes to speak but looks down to T’s arm. “It's not a bite. But he cut himself really bad.” Bella says before she thinks the worst.

“We'll have it looked at.”

Glenn pulls up the large bag of drugs Bella had found alongside their RV stash. “We have some painkillers and antibiotics. I already gave him some.” He motions to T-Dog. “If Carl needs any.” Bella hands her empty mug to Maggie before grabbing the bag. She moves to reenter the house, but Glenn stops her by grabbing the towel. Bella looks up to the man as he gently dabs at the blood swipe across her face. The blood comes away easier than the stuff on her hands. “All good now.” He tells her with a pained smile.

The girl grabs the towel back and gives him a smile, “Thank you, Mr. Glenn.”

“Come on inside. I'll make you something to eat.” Maggie tells them and Bella leads the group back into Carl’s room. The parents have had enough time alone with Carl.

T-Dog and Glenn see the parents and the wounded boy; they give their support before leaving the room. 

Bella hops swiftly onto the bed before handing the bag to Hershel who checks on Carl. Now that she’s back, she can feel the eyes. The eyes that stare deeply at her back… at Carl.

“They don't get back soon, we're gonna have a decision to make.” Hershel speaks into the room now that they are alone.

Rick holds tight to Lori's hand, “And that is?”

Hershel looks to the parents. “Whether to operate on your boy without the respirator.”

“You said that wouldn't work.” Lori says. How could he say something like that, knowing it won’t work?

The doctor nods, “I know. It's extremely unlikely. But we can't wait much longer.” Rick and Lori found out quite painfully that Hershel wasn’t a real doctor- well, real in the sense that he wasn’t a doctor for people… he was a veterinarian, a doctor for animals. And it made the odds even worse.

Carl was shot in a world with no hospitals, no more doctors… just people trying to survive, and the boy may not even make it. If Shane and Otis don’t make it back… he won’t.

“Daddy will be back soon.” Bella says before Rick or Lori can say anything else. “He has to…” She whispers to herself as she stares down at Carl.

She can’t see herself living without Carl. He’s her best friend… no one is supposed to lose their best friend. And her daddy needs to make it back- he has too.

If her daddy doesn’t make it back, then that means… It means he’s dead. And then Carl will die too. She can’t… she can’t breathe. Her chest is tightening, and she can’t breathe. She’s going to lose her daddy and Carl… she can’t-

“Bee?”

Bella snaps back to Carl who struggles to open his eyes. “I’m here-” she says to the boy. Looking around she notices they’re alone. Rick and Lori must’ve stepped outside- she can hear their voices on the porch.

Carl cracks his crusty eyes open, “Where are we?”

Bella smiles down at Carl- his talking! That means he’ll be okay! 

Right?!

“Mr. Grimes!” Bella shouts over her shoulder quickly before looking back to Carl. “You’re okay Carl. Everything’s okay…”

Carl looks at Bella and raises his arm weakly. “You’re dirty.” The boy says to her.

Bella’s response dies on her tongue as Rick and others stomp their way into the room. The father drops alongside Carl’s head, his hand falling to the boy’s hair in comfort. “Hey, little man.” He smiles at his son who smiles back. “That's Hershel. We're in his house. You had an accident.” Carl turns his head towards the older man by the door before looking back to his mom and dad.

His chest jumps and he hovers his hand over his stomach, “It hurts, a lot.”

Lori drops by his stomach and grabs his hand gently, “Oh baby, I know. I know.”

The boy looks back to Bella with a smile, “You should have seen it.” He says back to his mom.

“What?”

“The deer.” Bella huffs a teary laugh, “It was so pretty, mom. It was so close. I've never been…” The boy trails off slowly and his eyes go unfocused. 

“Carl?” Bella calls as she feels the eyes slither back into the shadows of the room.

But he doesn’t answer. His body just starts shaking. Thrashing back and forth with no care or control.

Lori cries out, “What is happening?”

Rick grabs at Bella pulling her over Carl and off the bed when she tries holding Carl. “Don't. It's a seizure.” Heshel calls as he pulls everything off the bed besides Carl. “If you hold him down, you could hurt him.”

Lori cries and holds Rick and Bella, “You can't stop it?”

Hershel sighs. “He has to just go through it.” The boy continues to move uncontrollably on the bed and slows after a minute of movement. 

The pale body stills and melts once the movement has disappeared. No one moves in the room. Why isn’t he moving? Why is no one moving?

“What’s happening?!” Bella screams at Hershel from her spot against Rick’s side.

The doctor holds a stethoscope to Carl and moves to checking the boy's eyes with a small pen light. “His brain isn't getting enough blood. His pressure is bottoming. He needs another transfusion.” He concludes to the trio.

The father nods and rolls up his sleeve, dropping his tearful wife and the child on his arm. “Okay, I'm ready.”

The man shakes his head, “If I take any more out of you your body could shut down. You could go into a coma. Or cardiac arrest.”

“You're wasting time.” He hisses with his arm stuck out.

Hershel gives in and prepares the IV for the transfusion. He takes everything he can- he takes too much… and it's still not enough.

Carl needs more blood. Everything he’s getting from Rick is filling in his belly. 

His stomach is large and round, too big for his small body, and discolored- bruised and blue all around. Rick watches from the chair he was resting on in- the lack of blood making him lightheaded. “He's still losing blood faster than we can replace it.” Hershel comments in his place next to Carl. Bella has moved to rest against the wall opposite Carl- from here she can see everything; Carl, Hershel, Rick, Lori, and the entrance to the room- she’ll know who comes and leaves. And that thing won’t be able to sneak past her. “And with the swelling in his abdomen we can't wait any longer or he's just going to slip away. Now I need to know right now if you want me to do this, because I think your boy is out of time.” The pain in Hershel’s voice is covered slightly by his words. “You have to make a choice.” He insists- this was not something he would make for them.

“A choice?” Lori cries from next to Rick.

And her husband nods, sitting up to grab at her hands. “A choice. You have to tell me what it is.” Lori and Rick… they had talked before, about Carl, about this new world- a world of survival… isn’t a safe place for a kid. “You have to tell me what it is.” Rick begs his wife to tell him. To tell him what to do- he can’t make this decision.

“We do it.”

Bella watches in disbelief as the group begins to prepare the room. Nothing she could say would stop them- she tries. She tries begging Rick and Lori to wait, her daddy will be here soon, they just need more time. “There isn’t any more time, Bella.” Rick tells her as he pushes her back gently.

Hershel points to the corners of the bed. A young boy- Jimmy, Patracia, Rick and Hershel grab the four corners of the bed’s sheet, “Okay, on three. One, two, three.” The group heaves the sheet and Carl up and onto a steel table. Hershel and Patricia begin preparing Carl and their instruments, “Rick, Lori, Bella, you may want to step out.” He tells the trio who watches intently.

And the girl shakes her head catching the sight of lights outside the window. Darting forward she pushes the curtains back to see the lights of the truck her daddy had left in.

“Daddy?!” Bella darts quickly out of the room.

The girl runs quickly outside and towards the man that draws himself out of the truck with the duffels in his arms. “Daddy!” Bella gripes tightly at Shane midsection.

Her father hugs back tightly but grabs at her head, “Carl?” She nods at him with a teary smile.

“There's still a chance.” Calls out Rick from behind them- he wobbles in his place.

“Otis?” Hershel calls out at the sight of Shane.

He shakes his head and whispers out a no. The shooter didn’t make it- he was dead.

Hershel commands the group to stay silent- Patrica can’t know, he needs her for the surgery. And with that he leaves back into the home, a duffel in his hand and the other in the young man’s, Jimmy. 

Shane nods at Rick and the two share a tight hug. “They kept blocking us at every turn. We had nothing left.” Shane says into Rick’s shoulder before pulling back, “We were down to 10 rounds. Then he said.. he said he'd cover me and that I should keep going. So that's what I did. I just.. I kept going. But I.. I looked back and he.. I tried.” His words are struggled out and everyone drops their heads. 

“He wanted to make it right.” Rick speaks for all of them. Otis shot Carl by accident and he wanted to fix it… he just had to die to do it.

The night continues its darkness as everyone sits awake and still in the living room just outside Carl’s room. No words are shared between them. The two hours they wait feel like forever until Hershel comes out.

All eyes find the older man, “He seems to have stabilized.” He tells them and the weight of the room dissipates. 

Carl’s okay. He’s going to be okay.

“I don't have words.” Lori cries.

“I don't either. Wish I did.” Hershel responds and looks around, “How do I tell Patricia about Otis?” He says mostly to himself. The woman was cleaning her hands in the kitchen- trying to stop the blood from staining her skin.

Rick looks down to Lori, “You go to Carl. I'll go with Hershel.” Together Rick and Hershel walk through the home into the kitchen. And Lori is trailed behind Shane and Bella into Carl’s room.

The mother cries in relief at the sight of her son, the color of his skin returning slowly. Shane holds Bella in his arms as she stares at the boy. 

Everyone feels the relief of the stress… but not Bella. Not really. Something’s still wrong.

The gaze of that creature is still nearby; she knows it.

That thing… looming over them like death. 

But Carl’s not dead. No one is.

Except for Otis but she doesn’t care about him. And he died far away from the farm.

So why does she still feel its gaze?

Why does that weight of the world still sit on her chest like a stone? 

Why does it sit on her chest even as she washes it away under the rain of the shower head? Under the blazing heat of the shower.

She rubs her skin raw with the help of the boiling spray. But it doesn’t leave her chest as she stands there. 

The eyes don’t leave her even when her daddy is outside the shower curtain. 

Death doesn’t leave her shoulder no matter how hard she scrubs at the wound on her side.

Chapter Text

The shower’s rain steams the bathroom. Shane wipes at the mirror to reveal himself in it. He twists and turns to look at his exposed upper body- scratches and bruises forming on his skin.

Even now, almost three hours after escaping the infested high school, his body is still taunted with adrenaline. His muscles are defined and sharp with the exhaustion of the day. Skin dirty with dried blood and dirt scattered on his arms.

His gaze traces over himself in a trance. 

It’s Bella’s voice that stops him. Looking over, the little girl stands next to the still running shower with dipping wet hair. She’s dressed in a skirt a size too big and a sweatshirt with ‘NEW YORK’ written across it- given by Hershel's daughters, Beth and Maggie. Her presence is dim… and blurred with the rest of the room.

Her skin was tinged red from the shower heat and her scrubbing but she’s clean now. Carl’s blood is gone from her skin.

In the small bathroom, the young girl grabs a towel and sticks it under the shower spray. Motioning for her dad to sit down, he grabs the stool and drops himself onto it- pushing the dirty clothes from it.

Shane sits still as his daughter wrings out the towel and begins to clean at the scratches on his back. The room is quiet for a few minutes before the girl makes her way in front of her dad. 

She stares at him until he raises his gaze, “What’s wrong, Princess?” He questions.

Bella is careful as she reaches up to her daddy’s hair. Her fingers gently trace the skin that burns at her touch. Shane’s hand jumps to the pain on his skull and he feels the difference; a spot of hair that was seemingly ripped from his head.

His eyes go wide at the realization and even wider as Bella turns and begins digging around the sink cabinet. The cabinet door is closed quickly as she finds what she was looking for.

Unraveling the cord, Bella plugs the electric razor into the wall and turns to her dad. Shane stills and lets Bella turn the razor on. The farmhouse had electricity but the Greene family decided to only use it when necessary.

The pair is silent as Bella drags the razor across her dad's hair, cutting it down to his skin, the now loose hair dropping to the floor to be cleaned later. The room is silent as she finishes her little task and places the razor on the bathroom sink.

Shane tries to read his daughter but it’s hard- his vision is still pinpoints.

“If you didn’t do it… I would have.” She says and her daddy can’t hide the surprise on his face. Do what, exactly? Drawing herself into his chest, she hugs him tight, “I love you, daddy.” Shane holds her carefully, unsure what to do. “I’ll be with Carl when you're done.” Bella pulls back and kisses his cheek before grabbing her gun and holster and walking out the bathroom door. Her daddy needed a moment alone.

Dropping down the stairs, the sun begins to rise outside, the house getting dusted in the warm yellow and oranges, and Bella moves towards Carl’s room. But her journey is stopped by Glenn who leads everyone outside as the RV and Daryl’s motorcycle roars outside.

Following Glenn, Bella watches the rest of the group exit their vehicles. Dale is the first one to approach, “How is he?” He looks towards Rick and Lori, trying not to be too hopeful.

Lori smiles, “He'll pull through, thanks to Hershel and his people.” She claims gratefully.

“And Shane.” Rick adds as the man exits the house much faster than Bella was expecting- the father cleaned and dressed in clothes too big. “We'd have lost Carl if not for him.”

Carol cries, “Thank God. We were so worried.”

“How'd it happen?”

Rick drops his head, “Hunting accident. That's all... Just a stupid accident.”

The group cannot express their thankfulness and happiness hearing that Carl was okay- that everyone was okay. 

Well… almost everyone.

But now, the group begins to settle and start their chores; setting up tents, water barrels, clothes lines, and more as Maggie brings out a large map by request of Rick.

It felt like that day almost two months ago when they first settled on the highway camp near Atlanta city. Everyone working together and feeling safe… but it didn’t last on the highway, and it probably wouldn’t last now.

Not with that thing still creeping around.

Everyone’s safe. Everyone’s alive… So why can Bella still feel it?

She must be going crazy… that thing wasn’t real- it was all in her mind. Right?

She must be crazy like that old man in the hospital. 

It was a couple days after Rick was shot, when the world was still normal, that Bella and Carl saw the man. They were walking through the busy and sterile smelling hospital halls with their parents, lost as to where they were going. 

Rick had been moved to a long-term room across the hospital and they were trying to find it when the old man- all skin and bones, darted out of his room and towards a nurse. 

He had begged the nurse to get the man out of his room. That the man wouldn’t say anything, he was just staring and staring and he won’t leave no matter what. But there was no man.

Another nurse saw the shocked faces on the group and led them away, directing them on how to leave the unit. Lori had questioned the male nurse on if the old man was okay and they were told he was merely experiencing some hallucinations and that he would be okay. 

But he obviously wasn’t.

Just like Bella wasn’t okay. 

With the shadows in the corners of her eyes… that disappears when she looks but she knows it was real. She knows that the thing is here.

No… no.

She’s okay. She’s fine… there's nothing wrong with her. She’s just tired.

Yeah?

Yeah… she’s just tired. It's the exhaustion. That’s all.

“I hear he woke up.” Shane’s voice comes from the RV. Bella realizes she’s been on autopilot helping Glenn with setting up the basics of the camp.

Lori smiles at the man who has the duffel of weapons slung over his shoulder. “Yeah. He's in and out, but yeah. He'll be alright.” 

The pair share a look deeper than appropriate, “That's good.” Shane cares about Carl and it meant more than anyone knew that he was okay. Lori gives him one more smile before turning to leave. “Did you mean it?” He says to her turned back.

“What?”

Shane sighs, “You said ‘stay’. Did you mean it?” He takes a step forward to the woman. They had talked once he returned with everything Carl needed and Lori told Shane to stay. She told him to stay with them- to stay with her… “Look, if you didn't just say so. But do it now. I need to know.” The man begs to the woman.

“I meant it.” She tells him seriously.

He smiles, “All right then.”

“Why would we not stay?” Bella voices calls as she steps down the small hill underneath the group of trees, they set their camp under.

Both adults look at the girl and Lori leaves swiftly with mumbled words of checking on Carl. 

Father and daughter watch the woman leave, the silence growing till Bella looks at Shane. “Come on, I need your help.” He commands turning away.

“Why would we leave?” She repeats.

Shane sighs and bends down. This is what he wanted to avoid. He didn’t want her to know, want her to worry. “We aren’t going anywhere, Princess.” He says looking into his daughter’s soft green eyes. 

“But you were planning on it.” Bella says with hardening eyes. 

Shane shakes his head. “No, I wasn’t.” He would never be able to leave Lori and Carl. He could never take Bella from Carl. He couldn’t… he wouldn’t be able to live with it.

But Bella doesn’t really believe it. Not when the creature is getting closer than it has been. It’s probably listening to them.

And it hurts. It puts her on edge. The creature is making her itch, making her nervous… unstable. How is she supposed to act with this thing constantly near her? It wasn’t possible.

“You weren’t?” She spits at her dad. Her eyes are so angry. His little girl was so angry. She never gets angry but… “That’s not what you said at the church.”

Her words still the air around them. She heard? She heard.

His and Lori’s conversation, she heard it. How the hell did she hear it?!

What is Shane thinking… of course she heard. They were out in the open and she was nearby.

Shane’s heart begins to beat painfully. His daughter heard he was going to take her away with no warning. She heard-

How much has she heard? Was it just that one conversation?

It must have been. But how could he be sure?

Bella stares down her dad. Eyes burning holes into his face. 

Shane’s little girl was… cold and angry.

He didn’t know what to say- a man that always had a response was stumped in the presence of a young girl.

Even with his desire to say something- anything - to Bella, their conversation is cut by the childish voice of Andrea. “Give up our guns?!” She stomps over to the pair.

Shane stands to face the woman with a sigh, “You heard Rick. We're guests here.”

“And you're okay with it?” She says bewildered.

The man sets his hands atop his hips, “I don't recall being asked. Now lay down your weapon.” He tells her. His waiting hand rests in the air for the woman’s weapon.

Her eyes drop to the hand and back to his eyes in disbelief. “You may like rolling over- I don't.” 

“You like complaining.” Bella spits at the woman, cutting off her whining. Shane drops his eyes to his daughter. “You're lying to me, daddy… I don’t like it. We promised to tell each other the truth.” She tells him, ignoring the woman next to them.

Shane sighs with soft eyes, “I ain’t lying to you, Princess.” He wanted his little girl back- not this angry spitfire. They were supposed to be a team.

“We have a problem.” Dale interrupts with concerned eyes.

Shane grunts in annoyance- he couldn’t get one minute to breathe. Trailing behind Dale, the trio make their way over to a well where others are gathering. Bella steams silently next to her daddy.

Shane, Bella, Lori, T-Dog, Glenn, Andrea, Dale, and Maggie circle around the opened farm well. And down at the bottom of the twenty-feet-or-so deep well, growls a fat bloated male walker. Its skin is slimed over with the algae of the well water and puss drips from a few cuts and bruises across its body- mostly caused by its fall. The walker’s hands reach up to the living flesh, as if its fat hands would reach them.

“Looks like we've got us a swimmer.” Dale sighs, leaning over to get a better look.

Glenn looks bewildered at the sight and turns to the group, “How long do you think it has been down there?” 

“Long enough to grow gills.” Andrea points out in disgust.

The walker seems to have… adapted to the water. Bloated and big to float atop the water while still flexible enough to reach high for the living.

Lori sighs while staring at the dead, “We can't leave it in there. God knows what it's doing to the water.” She scratches her head. The farm may have five wells to drink from but this one was feeding the cattle- who knows what it’s doing to them.

“We gotta get it out.” Shane decides, trailing off in thought.

T-Dog stands from his crouched position, “Easy. Put a bullet in its head.” He turns to move back towards camp, “I'll get a rope.”

“No.” Bella stops T-Dog from his march with a raise of her hand. 

“Why not? It's a good plan.” Glenn asks the girl. 

Andrea shakes her head from next to the girl, “It's a stupid plan.” She agrees to the surprise of Bella- the girl was really starting to not like the older woman but maybe she should give her another chance. “If that thing hasn't contaminated the water yet, blowing its brains out will finish the job.”

“She's right. Can't risk it.”

T-Dog questions, “So it has to come out alive?”

“So to speak.”

“How do we do that?” Glenn asks.

And his answer comes with a raised brow from everyone around the pit except Maggie. The walkers like meat- they’ll give it meat.

Maggie darts quickly to the farmhouse to find the large can of ham they had saved in their pantry. While T-Dog goes for the rope.

Gathering back, Shane and Bella tie two knots in their separate ropes. Bella ties a quick lariat loop around the ham and tightens it swiftly. She hands it off to T-Dog who begins to drop it down the well as Shane finishes off his knot.

The group leans back over the well. “He's not going for it.” Dale states. The walker merely growls and looks forward- it had lost interest in the living bodies a little bit ago. It must’ve realized it can’t get them. And it had no interest in canned ham.

T-Dog huffs and turns to look at Dale, “Maybe 'cause a canned ham don't kick and scream when you try to eat it.”

“He's right.” Lori states, still staring down the well, “There's a reason the dead didn't come back to life and start raiding our cupboards.”

Andrea crosses her arms, “We need live bait.” She turns her head towards Glenn. And Bella doesn’t like her anymore- the chance has been shattered.

Glenn looks bewildered as everyone turns to him, “What?! Why me?” He questions. No one wants to go down into a tiny well with a walker.

“You are the smallest.” T-Dog states.

“Why not a chicken?” Bella calls stopping the discussion. “This is a farm; you must have chickens or something?” How could they think dropping Glenn into a well was a good idea? 

The group turns to Maggie, and she confirms that there are chickens they could use.

“But how will we get the rope around the walker?” Andrea asks.

“The same way we were gonna do it with canned ham,” Bella shoots back quickly. 

“Bella.” Shane grounds out stopping the girl. He looks at the young Korean American with a questioning glance until he sighs. Glenn’s released sigh is all the confirmation the group needs to begin tying the rope around Glenn and retrieve a horse for more strength.

Bella watches in amazement as Glenn, terrified but willing, sits on the ledge of the well and looks down at the walker whose interest has begun once again. “Have I mentioned that I really like your new haircut? You have a nice shaped head.” Glenn says to Shane as he tightens the rope once more, ensuring his knots are proper.

Shane gives him a calming smile, “Don't worry about it, bud. We're gonna get you out of here in one piece.”

“ Living piece. ” He corrects quickly, “That living part is important.” The young man is terrified- who wouldn’t be? He’s really thinking they should just shoot it and seal off the well. Dale’s confirming callout pushes him into action. “Nice and slow, please.” He begs as he slides off the ledge and hangs in the mouth opening.

“We got you.” Andrea responds.

Maggie paces and pulls at her hair, “Oh, you people are crazy.”

“You want to get it out of your well or not?” Shane grunts as he controls the speed Glenn drops down.

“Give us an eye there, Maggie.” Dale commands the young woman.

Bella draws closer to the opening alongside Maggie. The pair peaks down at the man. “Don’t get too close, Princess.” The father calls out harshly in seriousness. He did not need her falling down the well.

The young girl gives an understanding nod and kneels down to be stable. “Doing okay?” Maggie calls.

Glenn smiles up confidently, “Yup, doing great.” He drops his head down, “Living the dream.” He whispers to himself in fear. 

Maggie, trying to keep Glenn alive, gives the group commands, “Little lower. A little more.” The worried woman stares down at the well as the rope creaks from the tension.

Bella watches closely, giving little bits with Maggie. She likes Glenn- he’s always nice to her. And she doesn’t want to see him become walker bait. But her voice goes quiet as she feels its eyes on her neck. The things’ gaze burns holes in her head, as though asking what she’s going to do… how is she going to act?

And the silent question distracts her until the snap and shouts fill her ears. Maggie’s hands grab her shoulders and fling her to her back, the woman protecting the younger with her body as the pipe that supports Glenn snaps from its screws.

People begin to scream, the loudest is Glenn, as he sinks deep into the well, the walker’s hands scraping the bottom of his shoes.

Shane dives for the rope but it snaps away from his grasp. 

So, T-Dog tries for the grab.

Sliding across the ground, T-Dog grips tightly at the rope- his palms victim to the burn of the rope but the saving grace of Glenn… saving in the sense he wasn’t face-to-face with the walker. But the rope sinks Glenn down an extra three feet as T-Dog plants his feet against the well’s rim.

A mixture of screams fills the area as all the adults jump to T-Dog’s help, grasping and pulling as hard as they could as Glenn’s blood curling screams flow out of the well. Dust springs up into the air as the rope is dragged back.

Glenn’s hands grip the stones so hard they turn white. 

Maggie had joined the others in pulling the rope, leaving Bella to go to the edge to drag him up. Gripping his forearm tightly, Bella heavies hard in a final pull, Glenn fully peaking over the edge. “Mr. Glenn?! Are you okay?” Bella calls as the man curls up on his knees and seemingly kisses to dusty ground.

The man nods as dust clumps on his sweaty neck. Bella peaks along his legs in the same manner her daddy had done two days ago in the forest. There was nothing- no scratches or bites… thank God- or whatever was watching them.

“Back to the drawing board.” Dale says once everyone knows Glenn is okay.

The man huffs deeply for air and laughter bubbles over the edge, “Says you.” Snatching the rope off the ground, Glenn slaps the tight rope into Dale’s shocked hand. Following the rope, the group peaks over and sees the rope that is threaded around the walker's torso.

He did it.

Glenn did it!

Wasting no time. The group prepares to drag the walker out. With the rope attached to the horse, Maggie stands to lead the horse while the others prepare to pull too.

Tsking the horse into motion, the walker begins its journey up to the surface. Bella leans over the edge next to T-Dog, his hands were burning from the rope so it was decided he wouldn’t pull. “Almost there, daddy.” Bella calls over her shoulder as the walker's bald head reaches the opening.

Leaping to her feet, T-Dog pushes the girl behind him as the walker’s teeth see the light of the day. “Watch out, dawg.” Shane commands as the walker comes closer and closer to getting out of the well. But the reveal comes to a stop as the walker’s waist stops on the well’s edge. 

“It's stuck! Come on.” T-Dog calls out and the horse rears up and pulls harder.

The group heavies once more and the rope loses tension. Those holding the rope fall to the ground as the walker growls and squelches. Its body is pulled apart, legs stuck on the well’s edge as the upper body is pulled from it easily. 

“That’s no good.” Bella says as she watches the entrails of the walker spill onto the ground. A horrid smell of rotting insides fills the air and the walker continues growling even as its legs fall back into the well.

Sighing, Shane moves forward and grabs Bella's head, turning it away from the scene. She just watched as the walker split in half, as it turned and continued growling with no emotion… she just watched.

“We should seal off this well.” Dale calls.

“Might be a good idea.”

“So... what do we do about…”

SLAM! SLAM! SLAM!

T-Dog takes an ax to the walker's head. The remnants splash across the ground and the skull turns to mush. Once he’s satisfied, the black man looks up to the others, “Good thing we didn't do anything stupid like shoot it.” He says with mild venom.

He throws the ax to the ground and walks away. He wasn’t the first to walk away though- Maggie turned in shocked surprise as T-Dog killed the walker, only Glenn and Bella noticed her leave.

The group was disappointed. All that work and worry for nothing. They sealed the well and broke its pump arm so no one could ever get water from it again. 

Bella watched as everyone cleaned up the mess, she made sure to double check Glenn was okay and grabbed some gauze coverings for T-Dog’s ripped palms. And with everything cleaned up, Bella drags herself to the farmhouse, she’s tired and dirty and she still hasn’t checked on Carl.

Walking into the room, Bella comes face to face with Lori who rests in the air chair next to Carl’s bed with a book in her hand. The woman looks up at the creaking of the floor boards, "Everything all good by the pump?” She asks.

“Yes, Mrs. Grimes. All cleaned.” 

Lori gives her a tight smile and snaps her book closed, “You mind staying with him for a while?” She asks the young girl who gives her a questioning eyebrow raise- the mother had only been sitting with Carl for the past thirty minutes- now she wants to leave? “I have some stuff to do.” Lori explains simply.

Truth be told, Bella didn’t care. She would stay either way. “Yes, Mrs. Grimes. Take your time.”

“Thank you, sweetie.” Lori says standing and leaving with a kiss to Carl’s head.

Bella pulls off her gifted sweatshirt, the air getting warm now that it's midday, and cracks a window open farther so the fresh breeze can sneak in. “Bee?” Bella turns quickly to the bed where Carl starts to wake.

A strong breeze follows the young girl, kicking up the curtains as she circles the bed, “Hey, Carl.” She smiles down at the boy. Carl rubs harshly at his crusty eyes, “Are you okay? Any pain?” She worries.

“I’m okay.” The boy tries to sit up but only succeeds in raising his head higher onto the pillow. “Where’s mom and dad?” Carl looks around the empty room.

“They're doing chores.”

Carl looks at Bella, “Sophia?”

“I don’t know.” She says simply but the sad look on Carl’s face twists her chest, “They haven’t found her.”

Carl looks baffled, “What?”

“They haven’t found her.” She says again confused.

“Are they looking?”

Bella nods, “I think so.” The girl sits on the bed sideways to Carl, head dropped down.

Carl is quiet for a moment, “Bee? What’s wrong?” This time he pulls himself higher but stops with the tinged in his stomach.

The girl shrugs her shoulders, “Nothing- I’m just worried about you.” She tells him seriously.

The boy laughs and pushes at her shoulder, “Shut up- I’m fine.”

“You got shot, Carl.” Her words stop Carl. “I thought you died .” She tells him.

“It wouldn’t be that easy.” He responds simply.

Tears slowly crest her eyes, “I thought you died before we even hit the ground.” The girl stares at Carl’s stomach and the gaze that is tinged slightly with red, the wound underneath trying to heal, “I- I thought you left me.” 

The boy is quiet in the presence of his friend. It’s not the first time they’ve been emotional but this… this is different. Carl almost died. And it’s finally hitting him. “I’m sorry, Bee,” he tells her. When his dad got shot… his world shattered. If Bella had gotten shot- it would shatter again.

Bella shrugs and adjusts herself on the bed, fiddling with her skirt, “It’s not your fault… I should’ve stayed in front."

“What, so you could get shot?”

Yes. So, she could’ve been the one in the bed. It would have shattered her daddy’s world but it’s Carl. He would understand. “... it doesn’t matter now.” She responds.

And the pair goes silent, chirping flows into the room with distant voices. Carl sits awkwardly and plays with his hands. “So… what have you been up to?”

“Watching over you.” She says and Carl rolls his eyes at her. Bella smiles in return- he hates when she says that. “Ripping a walker in half.” She tacks on.

Carl’s eyes go wide, and a smile breaks over his face, “What?! What happened?”

The young girl turns to face Carl fully, dragging a bent leg up onto the bed, “There was this fat bloated walker in one of the wells.” She starts, “Daddy said we needed to get it out, so Mr. Glenn goes into the well to try and get a rope around it. But the pole that was holding him snaps and drops him.” Carl goes to speak in worry, but she raises her hand for him to wait. “But Mr. T-Dog grabbed the rope and pulled him out like a superhero in a comic book.” Carl smiles with Bella. “Even with all that, Mr. Glenn still got the rope around the walker. So, we started to pull the thing out, but it got stuck. And Miss. Maggie had the horse pull really hard and it ripped the walker apart.” Bella motions at her waist, “All its guts and stuff fell out.” She jokingly mocks the walker using her hands.

Carl absorbs the story, “Really?! I bet it smelled nasty.” He comments as a large grumbling noise sounds through the room. Bella raises an eyebrow at Carl- the noise coming directly from his stomach, “I’m a little hungry.” He says simply grabbing gently at his stomach.

“I’ll go get you something.” She hops to her feet. “I found a book I think will be cool- I can read it to you?” She offers.

Carl nods, “As long as it’s not one of those health books you stole."

Bella smiles, “Mrs. Grimes does say that studying is important, even if we’re not in school.” Carl mockingly mouths the words as Bella says them. “I’ll be right back.” She says before leaning over Carl and kissing his cheek.

The girl is gone quickly, and Carl’s cheeks burn red. She kissed his cheek.

Why would she kiss his cheek? She’s never done that before.

But Carl doesn’t have long to think or wipe the heat from his face- Bella would be back quickly.

And in the kitchen of the farmhouse, Bella gathers a plate of food from Beth and the book Maggie had given her. The Greene family are very generous.

Walking back to the room, Bella is stopped by Lori who comes back into the house. “Bella, what are you doing?”

The girl looks up at Lori, “Getting Carl some food, Mrs. Grimes. And I was gonna read to him.” She explains even though one look at the contents in her hands could explain it.

Lori smiles, “Why don’t I take that to him?” She offers, “You could use some more sunlight.” 

“It’s okay, Mrs. Grimes.” She responds with a shake of her head.

Lori stands straighter and places her hands on her hips trying to seem nonchalant, “Your dad and everyone is talking about looking for Sophia. Don’t you want to help them?”

“No.”

Lori raises her eyebrows in confusion, “No?”

Bella looks at Lori, their eyes connected, “I don’t care about Sophia. I care about Carl .” Lori stands in shock as Bella walks away and into Carl’s room shutting the door behind her.

Lori has no idea how long she stands there in stunned silence. But soon she moves and continues her day.

But her shock doesn’t leave her face even as she cleans herself in the farmhouse. Hershel had offered a spare room to the parents so they could clean up before sitting with their son. The sun is dropping in the sky.

Numbly, Lori folds her old dirty clothes on the bed. Rick stands on the other side of the room watching her. 

She had been quiet since lunch, and he didn’t know why. She wouldn’t talk to him. “What’s wrong?” He asks again.

And like her other answers she responds, “Nothing.”

“It’s not nothing.” Rick says drifting towards Lori.

Lori sighs and stares at the pattern of the duvet cover, “It’s Bella.” She struggles out. “Something… things she’s said-” She tries to explain.

Rick nods and tries to get Lori to look at him, “She tends to say… ‘ things ’. We usually just ignore it.” He reminds her. But Lori’s mood doesn’t change. “What has she said?” He asks, maybe he could help her figure it out.

Lori sighs and drops her head back with her eyes closed, “It’s just- this whole situation with Sophia.” Her words are forced out as she digs her fingers into her eyes.

“What about it?” Lori shakes her head- she shouldn’t have said anything, “Hey- hey. What is it?” Rick asks worriedly, he grabs her shoulders reassuringly.

The woman grabs at his forearms, “She said she doesn’t care about Sophia today.” She whispers as though she was telling a secret, “And she- she had this tone… this look in her eyes… she meant it .” Lori didn’t know how else to explain what she saw, “She’s… worrying me.” The mother admits.

Rick looks at her in confusion, “Lori- she just watched Carl almost die. She was chased by walkers in the woods… it’s- it’s normal that she would… act out.” He explains. Sure, Bella was acting weird but how would someone expect a child to react?

Lori shakes her head hard and pushes Rick’s hands off her shoulders, “It’s not just acting out, Rick.” She speaks. She’s been thinking about it for so long. That morning in the CDC, when Bella took the blame for the scratches on Shane’s neck. The way she would stare at Carl and Sophia when they were together. The way she won’t leave his side now… “I think she left Sophia in the woods.” She whispers.

“I-I’m sorry… what?” Rick stutters out after a pregnant pause. “You think-?”

“She left Sophia in the woods.” 

Rick stares at Lori dumbfounded. She can’t really believe that? But the look on her face… she believes it. It’s mixed with the exhaustion in her eyes. “You can’t really think that?” He says again.

Sure, she was her father’s daughter, but she’s never been aggressive or… dangerous. Never. She was a child in a death filled world and her friend almost died- how is she supposed to act?

Lori paces to the other side of the room and back to the bed, “Don’t tell me you haven’t noticed her… cling to Carl . Haven’t noticed her snap at everyone when it comes to him or Shane.” She questions him. How could Rick not see it?

Rick sputters. Bella was like a daughter to them. She and Carl were raised together. “Do you even understand what you’re accusing her of?” He questions. Lori was accusing Bella of leaving Sohpia in the woods… of leaving her to die.

“I know- I know, it’s absolutely terrible. I know I shouldn’t but-” Lori breathes hard into the room, “It’s all I’ve been thinking of.” She admits, she won’t tell Rick all the reasons- she can’t tell Rick all the reasons. “What if she- what if… she becomes ‘obsessed’ with Carl? Possessive?” She proposes to Rick.

“Why would you think that would happen?”

“Because she’s like-” She stops herself.

Rick steps forward, “She’s like what?”

Lori licks her lips, “She’s like her dad.” Lori looks to her husband- they both know Shane risked everything; his own life and Bella’s, to protect Carl and her during the outbreak… even now he’s still protecting them.“Shane became protective over me and Carl, he’s been watching over us.”

“Protective and possessive are two different things.”

“Does a child know the difference?”

Rick raises his hand in a calming nature, “Bella may be… outspoken. But she’s not… dangerous. She wouldn’t leave Sophia alone in the woods.” He states firmly, leaving no room for discussion or push back. “ She wouldn’t. ”

She drops her head hard and grabs at her hair, “I’m sorry- I know… I know she… wouldn’t.”

“I think you need rest.” Rick tells her as he steps forward to grab Lori from behind.

Lori nods, “Yeah yeah you’re right. It’s the exhaustion talking.” She agrees as Rick wraps his arms around her waist.

Rick holds tight to her, “I love you… I love Carl.” He whispers into her ear, “And I’m not leaving you two.” He promises.

Lori smiles tiredly and tilts her head back into Rick’s, “I love you too.”

Chapter Text

The growls of the walkers drift quieter and quieter the further they go. Rick’s shouting drifts away too until there’s nothing but Bella and Sophia’s hard breathing.

They’re squeezed so tightly into the fallen tree roots that Bella can feel a piece sticking into her back. Sophia cries silently in shock and fear, her teddy in a white-knuckle grip.

The air is silent for a minute, a minute that feels like forever, before Sophia turns her head. “We should run.” She whispers.

Bella shakes her head and grasps tightly at the other girl’s arm, “Mr. Grimes said to wait.”

“What if he doesn’t come back?” The girl cries.

“He will.”

“You don’t know that!” Sophia shouts at her with utter fear.

Bella smacks a hand aggressively to the girl’s mouth to silence her- the forest around them goes quiet, the chirping birds gone. “Be quiet.” Bella hisses. “You already got us into this mess and I won’t have you getting me killed.” The words are spit like venom and Sophia’s eyes finally shed tears as she pushes herself away and into the open stream.

She stumbles hard into the water, tearing her palms. “This wasn’t my fault.” She claims loudly.

Bella whips her head side to side and shushes the girl, “Shut up and get over here.” She commands.

“You're not my mom!” Sophia shouts, “I’m going back. ‘Keep the sun on our left shoulder.’” She repeats Rick’s words and turns to drag her body through the water.

“You won’t see your mom again if you leave.” Bella whispers-shouts harshly. The warm air goes cold. “You won’t see your mom-” She trails off.

Sophia turns with red eyes and sniffles at the sight of Bella. 

She tries to open her mouth to respond but nothing comes out. No words come out.

Thick red blood drips from Sophia’s mouth like a waterfall. Her front stains red and the forest around them darkens around the pair.

And Bella watches in paralyzed fear.

The thing was surrounding them- it was watching her… it was watching Bella. Why is it watching her?

Bella can’t move. Not as Sophia’s thin body is snatched backwards by an invisible force. Not when the darkness turns the forest into nothing… not when she can feel its breath on her neck, so hot and ice cold at the same time.

Bella groans in disgust and discomfort as the creature’s hand curls around to her front and towards her mouth. 

She can’t see it’s hand- can’t see anything other than the bottom of her face but it’s there. The pressure and the heat. 

It trials up her cheek. She tries to scream but her mouth won’t open. Her lips are stuck together and she can’t make a noise. She tries- she rips her throat apart trying to scream but nothing is happening. 

She tries even as the creature moves its hand towards her mouth and nose- covering them both and stopping her breathing. Now she really can’t scream because she can’t breathe.

She can’t breathe. Her chest is ripping and searing. Why can’t she breathe? She needs to breathe.

She knows how to breathe. One in. One out. Repeat.

She just needs to open her mouth.

She needs to get away from this thing. But she can’t move.  

Hot tears drop from her eyes and the thing hisses and snatches it hand away. The tears had struck and burned its skin- at least she thinks it did because it whines and draws away from her.

It draws everything away from her- the darkness, the fear… she’s alone.

She doesn’t want to be alone.

Bella squeezes her eyes tight. She squeezes so tight, light dances behind her eyes. 

She can see a pretty yellow light… and she follows it. Her feet move with pins and needles, shocking her nerves. But it doesn’t matter because she’s moving. 

She’s jumping into the light.

“Bella?” The girl snaps her eyes open and sits straight up. Her father’s hand rests on her shoulder and her eyes dance around the room.

She fell asleep in a chair next to Carl. The duvet area her face laid is wet with tears similar to her damp cheeks and wet hair line. 

It was another nightmare. Why another nightmare?

Looking at her dad, his face is twisted in worry. His gut had told him to find her this morning before going searching for Sophia and he would never ignore it. “Princess? You okay?”

Bella wipes her eyes with the back of her hand, “I’m fine.”

But Shane doesn’t believe it. He pushes at the arm of the chair turning Bella fully to him with Carl lying peacefully on the bed. “Come on.” He whispers to her, arms open in invitation.

And Bella collapses into his arms. Shane picks her up easily and carries her outside the room. “I got you, Princess.” He tells her.

“I know, daddy.” Comes from the junction of his neck and shoulder.

Shane carries her out to the truck Rick and others stand around. Rick gives Shane an understanding nod and a small good morning to Bella. She responds in kind as Shane rests her more comfortably on his hip.

“Morning, guys. Let's get going. We've got a lot of ground to cover.” Rick calls out in the new morning air. “All right, everyone's getting new search grids today. If she made it as far as the farmhouse Daryl found, she might have gone further east than we've been so far.” He explains as he rolls the map out onto the truck's hood.

Daryl had left yesterday to search and found a farmhouse. Inside was a cabinet stuffed with some pillows and blankets with a recently opened can of food. Only someone the height of Sophia could’ve fit in there.

Jimmy, the young family friend of the Greene girl Beth, steps forward, “I'd like to help. I know the area pretty well and stuff.” He states.

Rick looks at the young man, “Hershel's okay with this?”

Jimmy nods stiffly-almost nervously, “Yeah yeah. He said I should ask you.”

Rick nods to the boy and looks around at everyone, “All right then. Thanks.”

Shane holds tight to Bella, “Nothing about what Daryl found screams Sophia to me. Anyone could have been holed up in that farmhouse.” He states looking at the map.

“Anybody includes her, right?” Andrea asks quickly. It was something. A peace of hope for the group and Carol.

Daryl moves his crossbow to one arm and raises the other, “Whoever slept in that cupboard was no bigger than yay-high.”

Andrea smiles, “It's a good lead. Maybe we'll pick up her trail again.” She looks at Daryl with hope filled eyes.

“No ‘ maybe ’ about it.” The redneck responds simply, “I'm gonna borrow a horse, head up to this ridge right here, take a bird's-eye view of the whole grid. If she's up there, I'll spot her.” His words leave no room for discussion. He wanted to find Sophia and no one would tell him otherwise.

“Good idea.” Rick says.

T-Dog huffs a laugh, “Maybe you'll see your chupacabra up there too.”

That turns Rick’s head, “Chupacabra?”

“You never heard this?” Dale laughs out, “Our first night in camp, Daryl tells us that the whole thing reminds him of a time when he went squirrel hunting and he saw a chupacabra.”

The group smiles but Jimmy is the one to laugh out loud. Daryl rounds on the boy, “What are you braying at, jackass?”

Jimmy looks at the redneck in wonder, “You believe in a blood-sucking dog?”

“Do you believe dead people walking around?” He shoots back, wiping the smirk off the boy’s face.

Jimmy licks his lips as he reaches for one of the many weapons on the truck hood. Rick stops him by pushing the barrel back down,  “Hey hey. Ever fired one before?”

“Well, if I'm going out, I want one.” Jimmy states.

Daryl huffs, “Yeah, and people in hell want slurpees.”

Shane adjusts Bella again as she sits straighter, “Why don't you come train tomorrow? If you're serious, I'm a certified instructor.” He tells the boy. They need gun training- all of them.

Andrea grabs her handgun and smiles gently at the boy, “For now he can come with us.”

Daryl shrugs, “He's yours to babysit then.”

Shane watches as everyone gathers their weapon. “And you are staying here, Princess.” He tells Bella. He pulls her up and off his hip and rests the girl onto the ground. The girl was as tall as Carl but curled in the arms of her dad, she was so small.

Bella adjusts her skirt and nods at Shane, “Yes, daddy. Be careful.” The young girl gives her dad a kiss on the cheek and a tight hug before running back to the farmhouse.

And the adults watch her go for a moment before preparing themselves and leaving the open fields for the woods.

It was four hours into searching when Rick decided to speak to Shane about something other than the woods. “You remember the name of that waitress at the dairy queen when we were in high school?” Rick questions the silent man, he had been steaming silently all day. “I know you, Shane, well enough to know that there is only one sure-fire way of engaging you in a conversation, and that is to start asking you about girls you did in high school.” He states knowingly. Shane gives him a look. “I don't want to, but I'm willing to do it if that's what it takes.”

Shane trails slowly, eyes dancing around the woods for any sign of living, “Maryanne.” He gifts Rick. “I told you about her?” He asks with a raised brow.

The sheriff huffs a laugh and gives a slight wince to the man, “In excruciating detail.”

“Excruciating, my ass.” Shane chuckles easily, “You used to live for those details back in the day.” He pokes at Rick.

The man inturn shrugs his shoulders, “I was impressionable. And I may have been living vicariously through you.” He concludes.

“Why wouldn't you, with my impressive list of accomplishments?” He jokes. “I was an artist in his prime. A protege.” He calls confidently.

Rick looks back and falls into step with Shane- the grips on their guns going loose in comfort, “You mean prodigy.” He corrects.

Shane shrugs and steps over a fallen tree, “Maybe. Is prodigy what you call a young high school stud that bangs 30-year-olds on the regular?” He questions like a highschool boy.

“What 30-year-old were you banging in high school?” Rick questions bewildered voice pitching high.

Shane slows and gives Rick a side-eye,  “The P.E. Teacher.”

“Mr. Daniels?”

“Mrs. Kelly.”

“The girls volleyball coach? Wasn't she married?” Rick asks as they continue their walk- they haven't found anything and they probably weren’t… not that Shane was going to say anything. “You know what I just remembered?” Rick calls out as he walks slightly ahead of Shane, “Why I never ask you about this stuff.”

“Why don't we talk about your high school love life then, huh?”

Rick tilts his head,  “Well, that's a short conversation. It may even already be over.”

“That right? There was Holly, right?” He asks but quickly retracts before Rick can speak, “Nope, that was me too. Then there was Sheila. That's the one you lied to me about.”

Rick shakes his head and raises his hand,  “I never lied about Sheila. I just got mixed up about what the bases meant.” He claims in embarrassment.

“Just so you know, a home run, that usually means a sexual act.” Shane performs a lowkey movement to emphasize his words, “That's intercourse.”

Rick laughs embarrassed, his cheeks turning pink like a young boy hearing about the birds-and-the-bees. “Yeah, I realize that now.”

“I think what you did was more like a ground rule double or something.”

“I'm aware of the judge's ruling.” Rick responds gently, continuing their walk.

The pair go silent in the quiet woods- the sounds of nature barely present. “Shouldn't be talking about this stuff. That life… it's gone and everyone in it.” Shane says sadly- everyone they knew was gone, that life and the futures they were going to have… it’s all gone. “Sheila. Maryanne. Mrs. Kelly. It's like we're old folk. All the people in our stories are all dead.” 

“We can't just forget them.” Rick responds.

Shane huffs, “The hell we can't. It's hard enough accepting what's happened without digging up the past. I'll tell you what it is. It's nostalgia.” Shane recalls and turns the words onto Rick, “It's like a drug. Keeps you from seeing things the way they are. That's a danger. You got people depending on you.”

Rick gives Shane a look, “You think I don't know that?” The air of old comfort had vanished between the two.

“I don't know. What are we doing?” Shane asks seriously, stopping in his place to stare down Rick. This conversation… it had been growing for a long time and the pair were going to talk- whether the other wanted too or not. “You got every able body at your disposal out scourging these woods for a little girl we both know is likely dead.” Shane words hit Rick painfully.

“You think we should abandon the search?” Rick asks seriously.

“It's not my call, is it?” Shane goes to walk.

Rick jumps in front of him, “I'm asking. I'm asking.” He almost begs.

The man sighs and scratches his head underneath his hat, “ Survival , Rick. It means making hard decisions. But you've got this knack. You spread us thinner and thinner.” He states the obvious, “I'm trying to save lives here and you're out saving cats from trees.”

Rick looks at him in shock, “Is that what you think Sophia is, a cat in a tree ?”

Shane’s eyes go hard, “Don't do that, man. Don't twist my words.” The man looks at Rick deeply, “How many times we get called up to look for a missing child, man? You got 72 hours. 72 hours , and after that you're looking for a body. And that was before.” Shane’s words are underlaid with begging- he needs Rick to understand that this search isn’t worth the dangers. It isn’t. “I mean you honestly think we're just gonna find Sophia alive?” He questions gently.

“Are you that sure we won't?”

“Are we being completely honest?” He asks.

Rick nods, “I'm counting on you to be.”

“It's math, man.” Shane admits to his friend. “Alive or not, Sophia, she only matters to the degree in which she doesn't drag the rest of us down.” Rick looks at Shane with barely concealed disbelief- Rick couldn’t understand what he was hearing. “I thought you wanted honest.” Shane gives him when he doesn’t speak. He begins walking again forcing Rick to follow, “If we'd just moved on, man, we'd be halfway to fort Benning right now and Carl wouldn't have gotten shot. You said so yourself. But we're out here, we're risking lives.” Shane continues when Rick doesn't move to respond. “Your own son almost died. Otis, he paid that bill. What the hell are we still doing this for?” He spits.

Rick draws to Shane, “I had her in my hand, Shane. She looked in my eyes and trusted me. I failed her. If I hadn't, she wouldn't be out here.” He cries to the man. “I think she's still alive and I'm not- I'm not gonna write her off.” He comments strongly. This was his responsibility, all of them were. Rick pulls back when Shane’s face doesn’t change. “I mean what if it was Bella? You’d want us to just forget about her?” He asks, licking his lips.

Shane shakes his head and drops it to his chest for a moment. “No… no I’d be searching these woods till I knew.” He says simply. He steps towards Rick, his face turning into stone, “But I wouldn’t have the entire group spread thin looking for her. I’d before searching for her- me.”

“That’s what I’m doing.” Rick responds.

Shane shakes his head and his lips curl, “No you got the whole group searching.”

“They want to- they wanna look for Sophia .” Rick spits in annoyance. He wasn’t forcing anyone to go searching, they want to.

Shane pulls back and eyes Rick up and down, “Why’d you say it like that?” 

“What?”

“That tone-” Shane questions, “what is it you're not saying?”

Rick licks his lips- he didn’t mean for it to slip. His and Lori’s conversation last night. His wife was exhausted- it was fear from exhaustion… it wasn’t real. But Shane won’t let Rick escape this, not when it’s about Bella. “Look, brother… I don’t think this- not for a second but-” He starts gently, gun even looser in his hand.

“But what?”

Rick shakes his head at Shane's face. “Never mind.” He speaks. He knows what he would do for Carl… and he knows Shane would do the same for Bella.

Shane stops Rick from walking away by blocking the path with his gun, “No, go on. Say it .” 

He drops his head and tries to find his words, “It’s Bella and her… attitude?”

Shane looks at him in bewilderment, “Her attitude? She’s a kid- hell she’s better then half the damn adults in this camp; more mature, more thoughtful.” He lists, “But you’re worried about her attitude?”

 “It’s not me. It’s Lori.” The moment the words leave his lips, Rick wants to take back even starting the conversation.

Shane’s face drops sadly, “Lori?” 

Rick lips his lips, “She’s worried that Bella is… acting out?” Shane raises an eyebrow to the man to continue- ‘acting out’ was not a reason for anything. “She thinks Bella’s becoming overly protective of Carl.” 

Shane pulls back, “The hell is wrong with her being protective of her friend? She watched Carl almost die.”

Rick raises his hands as Shane’s shoulders start to tense, “I don’t- look forget it.” But Shane’s face doesn’t change, his eyes go hard, and his grip tightens on his weapon, “Brother, please. I’m happy Bella is watching over Carl- I’m thankful they have each other in this shitty situation.” Rick tells him honestly, taking a step forward placing a hand on Shane’s shoulder, “I think it’s just- it’s everything that’s been happening. There’s so much stress and-”

“I don’t need your excuses.” Shane pushes the hand off his shoulder and turns away from Rick. Everything he’s done was to protect Bella, Carl and Lori. And now Lori is turning her back on him and his daughter?

Rick grabs Shane’s turned shoulder and pulls him around, “Shane. Don’t turn your back on me. We’re being honest, aren’t we?” He shoots back at Shane. They need to talk and getting pissy won’t help.

“I thought we were.” He agrees. Shane drops his head to his chest and worries his hands around the barrel of his gun. “Lori really thinks Bella is a problem?” He asks softly.

Rick sighs at Shane’s beaten look, “I just- I think she’s worried. She almost lost her child, everything's fracturing-” 

“And she’s blaming Bella.”

“She isn’t blaming her.”

“What did she say?” The bite of his words comes back, “Lori isn’t blaming her but she’s thinking something.” Rick stays silent for a moment because Lori’s worry stems from something that isn’t true. Bella would never leave Sophia or anyone behind- she’s not like that… she’s not a monster. “It's blue. It's Andrea and t-dog.” Shane’s voice pulls Rick from his silent trance. Looking up he sees the blue marker in a tree. “Looks like we wandered into their grid.”

Shane is silently steaming as he turns around to go back the other way. “Shane…” Rick calls out without having turned around, “I shouldn’t have said anything.” He says simply once Shane’s steps stop. “You know I care about Bella, right? I care about you.” He tells him honestly. “I’m trying my best… I don’t know what else to do.” He admits painfully into the open forest.

“I get it.” Is all Shane says before starting his steps once more.

The pair walks in silence back to the farm camp, they had searched their entire mapped area and needed to regroup. 

Both men grow tense and angrier the farther they walk in silence. Rick hands off his weapon to Shane as he parts from the sheriff; Rick goes to Lori and Shane heads to the RV.

Bella rises from her place by the clothes lines- she had decided to help Carol with the chores. Moving after her dad, Bella hops up the RV step and inside where only her dad stands. “Is everything okay, daddy?” She asks crawling onto the RV dining seat.

“Everything’s fine.” Shane grits out as he unloads the shotgun and slides it into the bag.

Bella’s eyebrows turn into a frown, “Then why are you mad?” 

Shane takes a deep breath and pauses his movements. “You don't need to worry yourself with that.” He says before digging around the bag again. “Where’s your gun?” he questions the young girl.

“I have it.” Bella responds quickly. “I thought we were being honest.” She asks her father. 

Shane takes a deep sigh and sits opposite his daughter. “What happened in the woods?” He asks softly. “And don’t say you fell.” He comments.

Bella raises an eyebrow and sits back, “Daddy, what happened?”

“Just- just tell me what happened.” 

Bella stares at her father in confusion. “Sophia ran.” Shane watches Bella closely, “I ran behind her and I fell. When I stood up, she was gone.” Bella’s words are simple and easy. “Did something happen? Did you find her?”

Shane drops his head to his chest. “Are you lying to me?”

“Never, daddy.” Bella’s face twists in pain.

Shane bites his lip hard enough to draw blood. “I think you are.” He says into the air. Bella leans away from the man as his eyes harden. “The other day you said- you said you ‘would’ve done it’ if I hadn’t.”

The young girl stares at Shane- her eyes looking back at the RV’s entrance quickly before finding her dad’s eyes once again. “I did.” She responds simply. “I would’ve killed Otis if you hadn't.”

Shane jumps back, “How the hell did-?!” He stops his loud voice and rounds the table to Bella. “Who said I killed Otis?” He whispers.

Bella smiles down at Shane and her hand cradles his cheek. “You’re my daddy. I figured it out myself.” She explains softly and the gears inside Shane’s head burn with friction, “Kids see and hear everything daddy.” The man sputters in his place on his knees. “But none of it matters… as long as you stay by my side. I’ll always be by yours- you should always be by mine.”

Shane sits in shock even as Bella rises and moves to leave the RV- perhaps her daddy would actually take a moment. “Bella-” Shane starts quietly at the lock opening. The young girl turns her head, hand resting on the handle, as Shane sits like a statue. “Have you told anyone?”

Bella shakes her head even though he can’t see it, “I hadn’t told anyone anything, daddy.” The door creaks open and Bella skips out back to camp where Glenn is finally emptying the supplies he and Maggie had found during their first trip to town.

And Shane… Shane sits in stunned silence in the RV, still resting on one knee by the table. He doesn’t move until Andrea enters the RV. As he stands a rage that he can’t place fills his veins and his fingers grasp tightly onto an ax.

Chapter Text

Bella sits on a chopped log with Glenn sitting opposite. The man’s hand rests on Bella's knee as she stares down intently at it. The chemical scent of nail polish is carried through the trees as Bella narrows her eyes in concentration. Her fingers move the small bristle brush across Glenn’s right hand finishing the last nail.

The young man had found a few bottles of nail polish that he thought the girl would enjoy. He was worried she wouldn’t be as excited as she was since the colors were black, a ugly orange, and a bright turquoise. But she grabbed at the bottle with a bright smile and dragged him down to a seat. 

And now, he sits with a full set of black nails- a few fingers had paint on the skin, but Bella wets a small towel and wipes it away. Glenn had sat still as Bella worked on her masterpiece- he was hoping to find some art supplies or books or anything her and Carl could enjoy but the small-town pharmacy Maggie brought him to, had very little left.

Glenn admires his nails, holding them to the side so Bella could look too, “How are you doing, Bella?” He asks, pulling his nails back at Bella’s hand motion.

“I’m alright, Mr. Glenn. How are you?” She responds as she adds some more polish to a lighter section of the man’s nails. “I see you’ve been hanging out with Miss Maggie.” The young girl looks up at Glenn with a small smirk as he stutters. “Do you like her?”

Glenn shrugs trying to act nonchalant, “Yeah… she’s nice.”

Bella pulls back with a larger smile, “You have a crush, Mr. Glenn.” The young girl cheers as she closes the polish.

“Shhh.. not so loud.” He whispers-shouts to the young girl, his head whipping around the camp for anyone that could have heard. Unknown to anyone but Glenn and Maggie, the young adults had formed a rather intimate relationship quickly… well except for Bella.

The young girl had a bachelor for a father, and she had noticed some little signs but for her… as long as she remained the most important thing in her daddy’s life- none of it mattered to her. 

And most would be horrified to know that she knows but it’s always been that way. She’s always known more than others her age.

Bella motions for Glenn to come closer, “I think Miss Maggie likes you too, Mr. Glenn.” The girl whispers into the man’s ear in secret.

His face carves in an excited smile. “Really?” He asks with hopeful eyes.

Bella gives him an approving smile and grabs a bin of towels Carol dropped next to her to fold- the young girl told Carol to let her fold since the elder was busy preparing dinner tonight for everyone. “Maybe you could sit with her at dinner tonight?” Bella says.

Glenn scratches the back of his head and his eyes dance around the camp again. The area was bustling with activity, all the groups were back from searching and now tending to their basic chores. “That’s a little too obvious, don’t you think?” The young man leans against his knees, taking care to not smudge his polish.

Bella shrugs and twists her skirt, “Maybe.” She speaks when a question enters her mind, “Do you-”

“Walker. Walker!” Andrea’s voice screams into the air.

The camp goes rigid and grasps at weapons. They were told they couldn’t carry any guns except one watchman, currently Andrea, so anything sharp was held to defend themselves.

The men of the camp circle the RV quickly, Bella trails behind Glenn. Thankfully his nails should be dry by now. “Just the one?” Rick calls out to the woman.

She nods hard and tightens the grip on her gun, “I bet I can nail it from here.” Her body moves to lay on the RV’s roof.

“No no, Andrea. Put the gun down.” Rick shuts the woman down and stops her cold.

From under the trees Shane comes walking over, ax in hand and his button up shirt open to the world, his lean chest on display, “You'd best let us handle this.” He commands the woman easily. He was still taunt with anger, rage, and confusion from his conversation with Bella. He would never take it out on her… so he turned to the stack of wood instead.

Rick sticks his arm out, “Shane, hold up. Hershel wants to deal with walkers.” But the hand is smacked out of the way as Shane continues in the direction Andrea had pointed in.

“What for, man? We got it covered.” His voice is hard and quick as he moves. T-Dog and Glenn follow behind the man. “Stay here.” Shane’s voice comes over his shoulder.

The group of four men sprint towards the walker, Rick trails behind the three. Bella follows her daddy’s words and stands next to RV by Dale; the older man is stepped up on the ladder.

The group gets farther and farther away, their colors smudging with the greens of the field. And Andrea drops to a knee. “Andrea, don't.” Dale says.

“Back off, Dale.” She spits as she lays down on the roof, gun snug against her shoulder and her eye finding the site.

The woman is going to shoot even with everyone telling her not to. “Don’t shoot, there may be more.” Bella’s voice calls. “You shoot, you'll draw all of them here.” She doesn’t really care about that- she cares more about how the older woman’s target is right next to her dad. If she shoots her dad… Bella doesn’t know what she would do.

“Quiet kid.” The woman spits as the group of men stop moving in the distance.

Bella tries to talk again but the shot rings out and the walker falls to the ground. Andrea beams at her shot and raises her head. “See?” She says looking at the old man and young girl, “I know how to-”

“No!” Echos a man’s voice from across the field.

More screams echo down to the camp and Bella’s heart sinks. Her feet move before she can even think. Her legs burn as she sprints hard across the grass towards her dad, she can’t see the men clearly. They are so far away. 

As her heart and legs burn and something rips, Bella comes to the scene. It’s not a walker- it’s Daryl . The redneck was covered in grime and wearing… a necklace of walker ears? That definitely won’t be a new fashion trend.

And the calling voices from behind her are coming closer. “Dad!?” She calls when she sees he’s fine. Shane grabs at Daryl’s side with Rick mirroring him, a tare from the bullet streaked across Daryl’s forehead… just a scratch, he’s still alive… hopefully.

Shane heaves the unconscious man higher and begins dragging him towards the farmhouse with Rick’s help, “It’s okay, Princess. Go get Hershel. Daryl needs help. Go!” He commands in a shout.

Bella nods hard and turns in her place running back towards the mass. Her voice calls out for the doctor and her voice rambles quickly on what happened when he exits his house. 

The group watches as Daryl is brought inside and Hershel enters another guest room, Maggie trailing behind with a bag of tools.

Bella stands to the side and helps Maggie and Hershel with getting fresh water- she had taken a liking to medicine… not surprising to anyone that really knows her, so she tries to watch when she can. 

But even though she is busy helping, her eyes catch the sight of the little doll of Sophia’s- it’s filthy, covered in grime and dirt, the details so muddled one would have a hard time figuring out what it actually was.

As it comes to stitches, Shane sends Bella away to Carl’s room. She kisses him goodnight, calling for a sleepover with Carl, and leaves to grab some plates of food from the kitchen for the both of them.

Watching the girl go, Rick, Shane, and Lori, stand in an empty hallway of the house. Shane rubs at his face, “I hate to say it, but I'm with Hershel on this one. Can't keep going out there, not after this.” He admits.

Rick’s eyes go hard, and he turns to the man, “You'd quit now? Daryl just risked his life to bring back the first hard evidence we've had.” His voice is soaked in disbelief and Lori gives the man a look. Daryl had taken a shot to the head and an arrow to his side, he’s lucky if he doesn’t get an infection.

“That is one way to look at it.” Shane gives Rick. But he tilts his head and stands from the crouch he sits in, “The way I see it, Daryl almost died today for a doll .” 

Rick huffs in annoyance, “Yeah, I know how you see it.” The sheriff practically spits before walking away. Lori gives her husband a small squeeze of the hand as he walks away.

Shane approaches Lori close, “I'm not out to be a hard case. Just being realistic.” He tells her like it's a secret. “He's just gotta start making the tough calls. You know I'm right.” The man can read the woman… well he thought he could, but all the stuff Rick said... Rick must have said Lori’s name so he could hide behind her. Rick is weak. He has been since the beginning… of course he would throw his wife under the bus.

Rick is weak.

Lori shakes her head and crosses her arms, “I may not agree with all of his choices, but I respect him.” Her voice is firm and final. She stands by her husband- she has to. “I know yours and mine, and your way isn't harder. It's the easiest thing in the world to cut our losses and to not help.” Of course, it’s easier- but it’s also what keeps you alive. “You keep telling yourself you're making the tough calls. You're really just trying-”

Shane closes the small gap that exists between the pair, “The only thing I care about now in this world is Bella, Carl, and you. So, I apologize if I appear to be insensitive to the needs of others, but you see… I'll do whatever it takes to keep the three of you safe.” His eyes are hard and crazed as he speaks.

Lori, however, stands strong in front of Shane. “Even abandoning a lost child?”

“Yeah.” His voice is nonchalant.

“Even if it was Bella?”

Shane pulls even closer, if it’s even possible. “I wouldn’t put the entire group at risk. I’d find her- but Rick has every single one of us looking. It makes us weak.”

“Caring about finding Sohpia is not weak.” Lori spits at him. The woman shakes her head in disbelief and anger. Her feet pull her away from the man, turning her back but not leaving the hall.

Shane sighs, “I just want to protect you… you, Carl, my girl- that’s all I care about.” The man admits openly. He’s laying his heart out to Lori, why can’t she see that?

The brunette woman spins around. “My son and I are not your problem anymore, or your excuse.” Her beautiful face turns sour and mean.

And so does Shane. “Really?” He spits, stepping forward again, cornering Lori against a wall. “You’re really gonna try playing the innocent woman?” He laughs in her face before turning his face hard again. “You told me to leave. Then you told me to stay…hell you begged me to stay. But now you're acting like I’m the villain.” He accuses- if she wanted him gone, she should’ve told him to leave, she should’ve let him leave… But instead, Lori begged him to stay. For a woman that proclaimed her love for her husband she seems very content with keeping Shane around. “You're acting like Bella and I are the villains.” He tacks on and finds joy as Lori’s face falls, “Yeah, Rick let it slip- let it slip that you think Bella is problem.”

“I don’t think Bella is a problem.” Lori rebounds fast. “And I am far from innocent… just like you.” She pushes the larger man away with just an accusing finger.

“Then why don’t you tell me what you said?” 

“I said Bella is becoming possessive just like her father .” Shane watches Lori’s face closely from his place. “Possessive over someone that isn’t theirs; their problem, their family, or their partner.” She spits at the man. She’s so angry… so tired of this. She doesn’t want to ruin Rick and Shane’s relationship anymore than it already is, but she doesn’t want Shane or his offspring around her family anymore. “We made mistakes. I will never deny that. But you need to stop thinking I’m yours… you need to stop thinking Carl is yours. You have a child- you should be focusing on her.” She finalizes before turning on her heel. Shane stands still as Lori turns, “It seems she needs it.” The woman gives over her shoulder before leaving. 

Shane stands watching in a hot smoldering mess of nerves.

And Bella lays next to Carl in the guestroom he was first laid in just a few days ago. The pair had eaten swiftly and curled under the quilted duvet on the bed. Carl falls asleep quickly, his father’s sheriff’s hat resting on the nightstand. 

He had given the hat to his son, a joke of both of them getting shot shared and promised to be kept between the two. Carl excitedly showed the hat to Bella who listened intently to everything Carl had to say.

But the dark circles under the boy's eyes were quick to take control.

So here they are, laying underneath the blanket as the night air goes cold enough to nip at one’s heels. Bella can hear the clinking of utensils on plates and the muffled voices of everyone conversing at the dinner table… well mostly clinking- there aren’t many words being shared between the adults.

Bela sighs as she watches Carl sleep, “Our parents are fighting.” She whispers into the darkness. “I think it’s because of me.” She admits.

Carl mumbles, surprising Bella and he turns to his left side to face her. “No… not your fault.” His voice is filled with sleep and Bella can barely make out the words.

Laughing, the girl curls the blanket farther around the both of them, “Like how knocking over the crayon tower in Mrs. Shoemaker’s class wasn’t my fault?” She questions.

“You pushed me- it was your fault .” He mumbles.

“I don’t think so-” The girl smiles in response. Carl merely mumbles some more. “Go to sleep… tomorrow we’ll go see all the animals Mr. Hershel has.” Bella tells her friend- the doctor had given the, possible, okay for moving around tomorrow- he wanted to double check Carl’s healing before he really started moving.

The boy falls back to sleep quickly, and Bella closes her eyes a few minutes after Carl. She really doesn’t want to sleep- not with all the nightmares. But she needs to sleep. And her daddy always said he never dreams when he’s exhausted so she’s decided to try it for herself.

But even with her exhaustion, she can feel the pulsing pain in her side. It hasn’t gone away… but hopefully it will soon, she thinks.

In the darkness of her eyes, she struggles to find sleep. The noises of the dinner party go quiet, and the warmth of the bed gets even warmer on her skin… it’s getting really hot; she doesn't like it.

Opening her eyes to move the blanket off of her skin, her vision is meant with the leaves and trees of the woods. 

Bella feels her heart sink for a mere moment before a voice calls out, “Come on. We don’t have much time.” Sophia calls to her.

“Mr. Grimes will be back. We just have to wait.” Bella’s mouth speaks without her consent. The girl tries to move her limbs, but she can’t.

Sophia has tears flowing out of her eyes, “What if more walkers come?” She cries and looks around the trees as though one would jump out at any time.

“If we had stayed in the trees like Mr. Grimes told us too then it wouldn’t matter.”

Sophia turns on the girl, dragging her feet through the water they still stood in, “Why do you think you're so smart? You’re just a kid.” She yells at her.

Simmering rage flows through Bella’s veins, “At least I’m not acting like a baby.” She spits. “Mr. Grimes said he would be back and you're risking both our lives again because you can’t listen.” Bella’s feet move towards the young girl, “You’d think after growing up with that pathetic excuse of a man as a father that you would learn how to listen… no wonder your mother was always covered in bruises.” Her words cause Sophia’s face to drop and her lip to quiver. Bella’s words are mean… mean, rude, and insensitive. 

But she doesn’t care.

“Shut up! Don’t talk about my mom!” Sohpia screams at the top of her lungs.

“I’m not the one that needs to be quiet.” She responds with a controlled anger.

“I hate you!” The girl screams as she stomps her foot in the water. “You’re a bully! You think everyone likes you, but no one does! Even Carl hates you!” 

Bella goes still in the water as Sophia moves around, “Take it back.” The girl’s voice causes Sophia to pull back into herself- her eyes darkening in fear. The young girl doesn’t speak, she merely watches the other girl as she slowly takes another step forward, “I said… take that back .”

“Or what?” Sophia gathers up her courage. And the rage Bella could feel in her veins explodes to the surface.

Her body lunges forwards and her eyes open to the bright sun coming through the windows. 

Carl’s concerned face hovers next to Bella’s as she realizes she’s awake. The boy tries to question his friend, but she merely brushes it off and stands as Lori enters the room with Hershel. 

A new day has risen, and Carl is finally going to get out of the bed he’s been held prisoner to. Bella leaves him with his mother once she sees him stand on his own.

Bella walks in a daze around the camp, picking at her own painted nails, as she looks around. Glenn is acting weird. Lori is acting weird. Her daddy is acting weird… Everyone in the camp is acting weird. Why were they all acting weird?

Well… technically Bella has an idea why most of them are acting weird but Glenn… he’s acting extra weird.

Ignoring the confusion, Bella drifts down a dirt path of the farm, close to the camp but far enough away she could enjoy the beautiful site. She was still tired. 

She had slept the night, but the nightmare had come back. That thing has come back.

It never really left but it would come closer in her dreams. It made her scared. 

Why was it so close?

Why only when Sophia was involved? It makes no sense.

She had run away on her own… that’s not Bella's fault.

That child ran away and now everyone is putting themselves at risk to search for her…

That must be it. This search for Sophia… it’s going to kill someone. 

It must be why that thing is so close- peering over shoulders and hiding in the shadows.

It’s death waiting for it's time to strike.

Bella doesn’t realize her feet have stopped moving and she stares blankly out into the distance. It’s Carl that shakes her out of her daze- the field and the lonely barn in her vision. 

Carl pulls at Bella’s arm in excitement, and he drags her away. Bella is silent but happy to walk back towards the camp with Carl- the boy yapping quickly about everything he’s missed and what he wants to do.

The young girl just smiles as they come close to her daddy. The man sits by himself cleaning at some weapons atop a cut log.

Shane smiles at the pair and stands, “Dude, nice lid, man.” He calls as he hits the rim of the sheriff’s hat on Carl’s head. The young boy smiles brightly as Shane leans down with a kiss on Bella’s head. “What's going on?” He asks the two leaning against the RV’s outer wall.

Carl looks seriously at the man, “I want to learn to shoot too. Can you teach me?” Bella and Shane do a double take to the boy. He hadn’t mentioned learning.

Shane pulls his hat off and drops to his hunches, “Well, man, that's... that's up to your parents.” He tells the boy.

Carl looks over at Bella quickly before looking back at Shane, “Can you talk to them? They'll listen to you.” Shane’s face twists in a way that does not agree, “You taught Bee. You can teach me too.” He adds quickly to conversation. The girl did shoot a walker with trained accuracy during a frantic moment… and it was his training that allowed her to do that.

Shane sighs, “We'll see, okay?” The man stands up over the two.

Carl looks disheartened and Bella turns Carl to her, “They’ll say yes, Carl. I’m sure of it.”

The boy smiles in response and the pair turn to find his parents… but the clinking of metal stops the trio.

“Hey. Let me see what you've got there.” Shane commands simply and gently.

To both the father-and-daughter pair, they watch in surprise as Carl raises the front of his shirt and flannel to reveal the handle of a handgun tucked into his pants.

Shane snatches the gun quickly and slides it into his back waistband with a silent swear. Both kids are forced to sit down as Lori and Rick come up with Shane leading them.

“How the hell did this happen?” Lori’s ask as Dale joins the group.

Dale sighs and looks towards the kids, “Well, it's my fault. I let him into the RV.” He admits. “He said he wanted a walkie, that you sent him for one.” He tells on the boy.

Lori shakes her head in disbelief, “So on top of everything else, he lied. What's he thinking? ” Her words are almost spit at the end of her sentence.

“He wants to learn how to shoot. He asked me to teach him.” Shane gives the parents. “Now it's none of my business, but I'm happy to do it. It's your call.” Shane has trained many people, adults and children including his own, he is fully capable of training Carl.

Lori’s eyes are trained on Carl’s hunched over form- the boy was upset he was caught. “I'm not comfortable with it.” The group is silent in response and Lori whips her head to Rick, “Oh, don't make me out to be the unreasonable one here, Rick.”

Her husband nods and he raise his hands, “I know. I have my concerns too, but…”

“There's no ‘but’. He was just shot. ” She spits and rounds on her husband, “He's just back on his feet and he wants a gun?”

“Better than him being afraid of 'em.” The man says in response to his fuming wife- the world they know is changing, they need to be prepared. “There are guns in camp for a reason. He should learn to handle them safely.” 

“I don't want my kid walking around with a gun.” Everyone knows why she said the words she did. Even hidden underneath her larger sweater, it was obvious that Bella still has her gun on her… the father not taking it away.

“But how can you defend that? You can't let him go around without protection.”

“He's as safe as he'll ever be right here.” The mother calls at the man, “Look, everything you're saying makes perfect sense. It feels wrong.” She says, “I mean I didn't feel good about him following you out into the woods. And I wish I'd said something. I should've gone with my gut.” Her words hurt the group- everything that has happened not even a week ago hurts.

“He's growing up, thank God.” He comments, “We've got to start treating him more like an adult.”

“Then he needs to act like one. He's not mature enough to handle a gun.” She spits in the direction of her son.

And the boy jumps to his feet and enters the group's circle. “I'm not gonna play with it, mom. It's not a toy.” He assures his mother, “I'm sorry I disappointed you, but I want to look for Sophia and I want to defend our camp. I can't do that without a gun.” He explains, his posture, eyes, and voice displaying nothing but seriousness.

Lori is silent as she stares down her son. “Shane's the best instructor I know. I've seen him teach kids younger than Carl.” Rick assures the woman. “He taught Bella once she could hold one.” He tacks on as the girl rises and finds a spot just over Carl’s shoulder.

Lori couldn’t help but think of the devil on Carl’s shoulder.

Wiping her face, Lori walks forward and grasps at Carl’s face, her grip serious but not harmful. “You will take this seriously and you will behave responsibly. And if I hear from anyone in this camp that you're not living up to our expectations…”

“He won't let you down.” Rick interrupts.

Lori’s eyes stare down at the boy. “Yeah.” He gives his mom in understanding.

The mother releases her son and gives room for Rick to speak, “Now if you're gonna do this, you listen to Shane.”

“Okay, dad.”

Rick nods and begins to gather the group for gun training. Bella and Carl can’t help the large smiles that pull on their faces.

The young girl cared more that Carl was excited to learn than him actually learning. She knows how to shoot so it’s not like Carl would ever be in danger.

Arriving at the makeshift shooting range, Shane, Rick, and T-Dog work together to lead everyone into a line and begin their training.

Shane explains the basics of a weapon as everyone holds their own; the safety, the aim, how to hold it,... everything. Lucky everyone knew most of the basics- especially to only point at something with the intent to shoot. A gun wasn’t a toy, even unloaded.

With his teaching finished, Shane tells everyone to raise their weapons and begin shooting. The booms of gun shots sound out in a random pattern as everyone becomes accustomed to the snap of the weapon.

Bella walks with Shane and Rick as they look at everyone shooting. There was T-Dog, Andrea, Carol, Lori, Carl, Bella, Jimmy, Beth, and Patricia alongside the teachers. Everyone was given three practice shots- ammo is scarce and needed to be rationed. God forbid another herd came thru.

The trio come to the end of the line where Andrea stands with her weapon down. “Don't be discouraged. You'll hit the target eventually.” Shane tells her.

Andrea gives the man a side-eye and a smirk. “Who says I didn't hit my target?” Her voice is sassy.

Rick raises his binoculars and searches for bullet holes. Their targets are glass bottles, but Andrea had changed her target to the ‘o’ in the ‘No Trespassing’ sign. The men share a nod as Bella looks at the older woman with squinted eyes. “Try this one. It's heavy. You get better balance, twice the rounds.” Shane hands off a larger handgun to the woman.

Raising the weapon, Shane pulls Bella slightly behind his hip as Andrea lines up her site on the glass bottle. A single shot rings out in the air and the bottle shatters, everyone watches the glass fall to the grass.

Rick smirks at Shane, “I'd say she's got the hang of it.”

The man laughs and grabs the gun back, “I'd say she's ready for the advanced class.” He double checks his ammo and clicks the safety on, “It might be worth your while after the rest of us head back to camp.” He slides the weapon into his belt.

“Sure. Why not?”

 “How'd it feel?” Shane asks.

“I like the weight.” The woman grabs the original gun and checks the weapon herself. Rick and Bella drift away back towards the other end of the line where Carl and Lori stand. “So, you decided not to leave us.” The woman questions, “Something change your mind?” Her voice is sultry, and the man turns his head in the direction his daughter stands, she smiles brightly next to Carl, Rick resting on his knee next to the pair.

He merely nods to Andrea’s question and walks over. Bella pulls out her weapon next to Carl and pulls the trigger three times with a pregnant pause between each, “Nice, Princess. You like that one?” Shane calls as she holsters her weapon back under her top.

“Yes, daddy.”

Carl whines at the girl, “How did you get all of them?” He had gotten his shots close, but Bella had hit all of them.

Rick smiles and brushes Carl’s head, “She’s been doing this longer than you.”

Bella laughs at Carl, “What Mr. Grimes is trying to say is, ‘I'm better than you, that’s why I got all the shots, and you didn’t’.” Carl shoves the girl gently and she returns by sticking her tongue out at him.

“Careful, Princess.” Shane tells his daughter with a hand on her shoulder. “In no time, Carl will catch up with you.”

“We’ll see about that, won’t we?” She smirks.

Midday the group drifts back to the farm and the friends finally pull away from their parents' side. They walk down the path looking at the fields of horses and cows. There’re only a couple cows wandering, Maggie said that the cows were just stopping by earlier when Bella asked.

“Have you drawn anything?” Carl asks as he trails alongside Bella.

Bella picks a flower, “No… I haven’t had the time. Too busy taking care of you.” She pokes at the boy.

He rolls his eyes hard, “You're never going to drop that, are you?”

Bella shakes her head with a big grin, “A good friend would never let you forget.” Her words are cheeky.

The duo continues their walk, circling back towards the camp. “Do you think Sophia’s dead?” He asks into the air. “I don’t want her to be. I want to find her… hiding in a tree or something.” 

Bella tries to control her face as she continues next to Carl. “There’s always a chance she could be…” She says in response.

Carl slows down and worries about his hands. “Do you think she’s alive?” His voices to the girl.

Bella’s face turns and she stands emotionally distant from Carl, “She’s not alive. And if she is…” Her voice is quiet between the two, “It would be a miracle for her.”

“I don’t want to think she’s dead.”

The girl shrugs her shoulders and continues walking down the beaten path, “No one in this camp does but… it’s certain at this point.” Carl doesn’t respond to Bella.

They both know that it is extremely unlikely Sophia is still alive- it’s been too long. And with the walkers… adults couldn’t handle a walker, how is Sophia?

The air around the kids is tense with emotion as they approach the old brown barn of the farm. Bella slows down at the front of the barn, she stands a stone’s throw away from it with Carl at her back.

“What are you looking at?” He questions as he moves to stand by Bella’s side.

“The barn.” Her voice starts and her eyes squint, “It’s locked up.”

Carl shrugs with no care, “There’s probably stuff in there?” He states sassily. Bella however walks closer to the barn. It’s only when she’s an arm's length away that Carl pulls her back from touching the lock, “Don’t go near it. It’s locked for a reason.” 

Bella rolls her eyes as she turns her head, “Don’t be a scaredy pants.” She pokes at Carl. Even when he pushes her hand away, she continues poking the boy’s stomach gently aware of his bandage. 

With a final smack of his hand, Carl sticks his tongue out to the girl and blows at her. The pair roughhouse gently around the front of the barn. 

Carl rounds on the door as Bella tries to catch him, “Ew it stinks!” He calls out and walks away from the door.

“Probably filled with manure.”

Carl smirks, “You mean crap?”

“Yeah- a whole lot of crap.” Bella cackles and looks behind the pair in fear her daddy might be nearby to hear her curse. 

Bella takes a quick sniff before pulling away with a disgusted face. Carl laughs at her and together they mess around as they walk back towards the camp, Lori watching them approach.

Walking up to the camp, Lori leads the kids towards the house for lunch. Hershel had insisted Carl eat the preserved and fresh food the farm produced to ensure he has enough nutrients to heal his wound.

Laughing together about childish things, Bella, Carl, and Lori move towards the house where Hershel welcomes them in. 

Bella comments she wants to see her daddy quickly to see how he is and stands back as Carl follows Hershel. The man’s car is pulling up dust as it arrives back at camp.

And as the screen door slams closed Maggie calls out for Lori, “Hey! We got your stuff.” She shouts and approaches the stairs quickly; she smacks her horse’s lead into Glenn’s hand and storms away.

“Maggie, hang on, please.” Glenn pleads but it goes unnoticed.

Lori motions for them to follow her into the house, “Come on in here.”

Maggie digs deep into the paper white bag in her arms. “Why? Nothing to hide. We got your special delivery right here.” The young girl spits as Lori drifts down the stairs, “We got your lotion, got your conditioner, your Soap Opera Digest-”

“Maggie.” Glenn pleads.

Maggie throws the empty bag to the ground alongside everything she pulled out, “Next time you want something, get it your-damn-self. We're not your errand boys.” She growls at the woman.

 Lori stands in shock and concern as her eyes catch the sight of blood splatter on the young woman’s light flannel shirt, “Honey, I…”

“ And here's your abortion pills .” Maggie spits as she slaps the white prescription bag of drugs against the woman’s chest. Lori grabs weakly at the paper bag as Maggie turns and storms away. Glenn gives Lori a look of sorrow, struggle, and blame… Lori can’t place which emotion is for her as he too turns away and follows after Maggie.

Lori stares down at the bag in a frozen shock.

“You're pregnant?” Comes Bella’s voice.

Lori whips around and looks up the stairs to see Bella staring down them. If Lori’s heart hadn’t sunk… it did now. The young girl stares at the woman with cold unmoving eyes and Lori drips in dread.

Crawling up the stairs as quickly as possible, Lori drops to her knee to speak to the girl. “Bella, I need you to be quiet about this, please.” The woman begs the child, “I’m not certain, okay? It’s just in case.” Lori takes a deep and shaky breath. “I need to talk to Rick about this- but for now… I need you to keep this to yourself. Do you understand?... For Carl.” She tacks onto her words. Hopefully if Bella thought it’d protect Carl… she won’t say anything.

And Lori can't help the sigh of relief when Bella gives the woman a smile, “Yes, Mrs. Grimes. I won’t tell him.”

Lori, still stunned at everything that has occurred within three minutes, leaves the young girl behind at the greeting shout from Shane. Lori stumbles slightly but corrects herself swiftly as she walks to her tent.

And with her back turned Lori can’t see the smile that graces Bella face drop. The girl makes her way down the sets and towards her father swiftly. 

Approaching the group, Bella sees Andrea smirking seductively at Shane who looks tussled and Carol moving close with Dale by her side. Shane and Andrea had taken his blue SUV out to a long-abandoned neighborhood housing production in search of Sophia. But there was nothing but walkers and burned corpses.

“Anything?” Comes Carol’s hopeful voice.

Andrea shakes her head, “Not today. I'm so sorry. We'll cover more ground tomorrow.”

Dale holds Carol’s shoulder in support. “What happened out there?” He asks given the blood on Andrea and Shane’s clothes.

“The place was overrun.”

Carol gives Andrea a sad smile and leads her towards the RV, “Let's go get you cleaned up.”

Bella has now entered the makeshift circle of the adults, staring hard at her daddy. “Bella, could you grab some water for your dad and I?” Dale asks the young girl.

But her gaze doesn’t move from her dad as she continues her steps, “Sorry, Mr. Dale. I need to talk with my daddy.”

“It will only take a moment.” He insists.

“No.” She says simply passing the old man, “Come on, daddy.” The girl commands walking past her dad. The man looks after her in confusion before trailing after her, gun still in hand.

The young girl is silent as she leads her daddy towards the border of trees surrounding the farm. He tries calling her name, tries stopping her but she merely keeps moving.

Shane sighs hard- he had other things to deal with. Breaking through the bushes Bella finally stops. “Bella- that was rude.” Shane calls from behind the young girl.

“Do you love me?” Bella asks softly with her back still turned.

The father’s heart twists painfully at Bella’s words. “What kind of question is that? Of course I do .” Everything he’s done is for her… because he loves her and wants her to be happy. She’s the one thing he’s ever truly loved.

The girl whips around to face her dad, a stray tear dropping down her cheeks that are beginning to burn. “Then why are you trying to replace me?” Shane’s face turns in confusion. “First you sleep with Mrs. Grimes… and I didn’t care until Mr. Grimes came back and you started acting differently.” Bella spits as she stands still like a statue, anger coursing through her veins. “And now you're sleeping with Ms. Andrea, and you got Mrs. Grimes pregnant.” Shane’s eyes go wide. Pregnant… Lori was pregnant. The girl doesn’t let Shane process her words. She steps forward, “So I’ll ask you again, do you love me?” Bella’s voice cracks in pain and sadness. “Because my daddy would never turn his back on me.” 

Shane can’t find any words but somehow his mouth creates some, “How did you-?”

“I’m not an idiot.” She sneers at her dad, staring up at the man. “That’s what happens when you go out every Saturday night leaving me alone or with Carl. I learn things. ” Bella begins to pace with nervous uncontained energy, “I haven’t said anything because you're my daddy and we’re supposed to stick together but… you're leaving me.” Her lower lip quivers.

“I ain’t leaving you.”

“Yes, you are!” Bella screams at him. “Ms. Andrea is an idiot that will just get someone killed- hell she almost killed Mr. Daryl! And Mrs. Grimes thinks we’re both monsters but is so twisted she is willing to have her husband and mistress stay together even when we all know what’s happened!” The girl is so angry, and she points an accusing finger at the man.

The girl’s words hurt and Shane drops to his knees, “You don’t understand, Bella.” He explains as he tries to calm the air, “Lori and I needed… comfort-”

“You should’ve come to me!” She interrupts getting close to Shane’s face. “I’m your daughter! I’m the only one that really cares about you, but you turned to Mrs. Grimes!?” Her face is littered in bewilderment. “A woman that left you in the dust the moment her husband came back but you keep trying to crawl back to her!”

Shane can’t help how deep the girl’s words cut. They cut deep into his heart… deeper than he ever thought possible. “Watch your mouth.” He says simply in response. What else can he say?

“Or what?” She spits, leaning nose-to-nose with Shane, “You’ll kill me like you killed that fat pig, Otis?” She whispers in question.

“Bella-”

“No. I’m tired of listening… that's all I’ve been doing, and Carl got shot because of it!” She screams. Bella paces away, giving silence to the woods. She turns her back to her daddy once more, “Figure this out before you actually get me, Carl, or yourself killed.” The man doesn’t respond. “I’m not asking, daddy.” She says turning back to the man. “Go talk to whoever you want, 'cause it clearly isn’t me, and figure out what the hell is going on or I may accidently let something slip.” The girl’s threat lingers in the air as she leaves Shane kneeling in the leaves. 

And he stays there longer than he even knows… so long the sky begins to darken, and the air starts to bite at his cheeks.

And Bella sits inside the camp's dinner circle, smiling and laughing as though nothing had happened… as though she didn’t just tear into her father’s entire world.

Lori’s pregnant… and it’s Shane’s.

Lori is carrying Shane’s second child.

Now he can’t… won’t leave. What kind of man leaves his unborn child and the woman who’s carrying them?

Chapter Text

The morning has risen and the air begins to heat. The Atlanta group sits surrounding the breakfast fire, munching on eggs and some preserved bacon the Greene family had gifted them. It’s noticeable how Carl and Bella sit separated from their parents and how cold the air around Bella is.

Shane chews at the unseasoned eggs as Glenn walks forward in a bundle of nerves. His gaze lifts uninterested at the man. “Hey… hey, guys?” The man moves foot-to-foot as all eyes draw to him. “Um, so…” Gleen sneaks a look at Dale who encourages him with a nod. And it is with a deep breath that he says, “The barn is full of walkers.”

The silence that follows forces ringing into everyone’s ears. Shane is livid. 

In a flash, Shane leads the pack of worried people towards the barn. Questions are thrown at Glenn and into the air but none get answered as everyone gathers around the front of the barn. 

Shane takes a small peek into the darkened barn before walking back to the group. The pungent smell nauseates everyone’s stomachs and they hope the wind stops blowing it towards them. “You cannot tell me you're all right with this.” Shane states at Rick as he paces the entrance of the barn, only a stone throws away from the dangers inside.

Rick shakes his head, “No I'm not, but we're guests here. This isn't our land.”

“This is our lives!”

“Lower your voice.” Glenn begs.

Bella stands next to Carl outside the angry mess of adults, hand-in-hand. “We can't just sweep this under the rug.” Andrea states, swinging an arm up to the barn.

Shane pulls back slightly, “It ain't right. Not remotely.” He looks at Rick’s face in search. “Okay, we've either got to go in there, we've got to make things right or… we've just got to go.” Shane tries to finalize to the group, he had let the search go on but this wasn’t something he’d ignore. “Now we have been talking about Fort Benning for a long time.”

Rick shakes his head, “We can't go.”

“Why, Rick? Why?”

Carol takes a small step forward, “Because my daughter is still out there.”

Shane huffs harshly, “Okay.” His hand rubs against his face before pulling onto his hips, “Okay, I think it's time that we all start to just consider the other possibility.” He tells the mother.

“We're not leaving Sophia behind.” Rick tells Shane.

Daryl moves forward towards Shane, “I'm close to finding this girl. I just found her damn doll two days ago.” His voice is thick in his redneck accent.

“You found her doll, Daryl.” He claims, annoyed into the group, “That's what you did. You found a doll. ” A doll was nothing here… and in a creak. Sophia could be anywhere- if she’s still even alive.

Daryl wobbles close to Shane’s face, “You don't know what the hell you're talking about!” He shouts in anger.

The shouting starts to burn Bella’s chest and raise the hackles on her back. It’s here . The thing is here watching… listening to their shouts. It’s getting closer with each.

Carl can feel the tightened grip from Bella, his bones rub harshly together in his hand. He goes to tell Bella off but the girl’s wide-eyes stop him cold… she’s terrified, staring at the group.

“I'm just saying what needs to be said.” Shane tells the redneck. “You get a good lead, it's in the first 48 hours.”

“Shane, stop.”

Shane doesn’t stop. “Let me tell you something else, man. If she was alive out there and saw you coming all methed out with your buck knife and geek ears around your neck, she would run in the other direction.” The man spits at Daryl who launches at Shane in anger. The pair tussles,  barely laying hands on each other, because they are caught midair by others in the group.

Lori pushes at Shane’s chest once they are fully separated, groups divide slightly to reveal the entrance of the barn to the kids that stand away. “Back off!” Lori commands Shane.

Shane raises a finger, “Keep your hands off me.” He spits at Lori before pacing away.

Everyone watches Shane pace, “Now just let me talk to Hershel. Let me figure it out.” He tells everyone in the group.

“What are you gonna figure out?!”

Rick turns getting angrier, “If we're gonna stay, if we're gonna clear this barn, I have to talk him into it. This is his land .”

“Hershel sees those things in there as people… Sick people…” Dale stops everyone, heads turning in his direction as he steps forward slightly, “His wife, his stepson.”

“You knew?” Rick accuses.

Dale nods simply, “Yesterday I talked to Hershel.”

“And you waited the night?” Shane calls.

“I thought we could survive one more night.” Dale tells the hotheaded man with a twisted face,  “We did.” He states clearly into the air. “I was waiting till this morning to say something. But Glenn wanted to be the one.” He says easily to the group.

Shane walks close to Rick, “The man is crazy, Rick, if he thinks those things are alive.”

And more arguing begins as Bella watches. Carl tries to shake Bella, tries to get her to speak but nothing works and her grip is getting tighter. “Shane!” Carl finally calls into the air. But no one turns as everyone bites at each other's throat. “Shane!” He shrieks so loud everyone turns to the kids.

The group goes silent as the father rushes forward with Rick at his side. Shane drops to his knees and grasps at Bella’s unmoving face. “Bella? Princess, what’s wrong?” He questions as she doesn’t move. Next to Shane, Carl tries pulling out of Bella’s grasp again. Rick’s eye catches it and tries pulling Bella’s hand out of Carl’s but her strength is inhuman. “Bella! What’s wrong?”

“You need to stop shouting…” She whispers to the group as her eyes continue to stare at the barn doors, doors that are only stopped but the lock that lays on it. The doors swing viciously outwards and inwards as the walkers inside push to leave, as they fight to get the fresh flesh outside the wood door.

Everyone jumps away from the doors and gathers back towards the kids. Bella’s hand finally loosens enough for Carl to pull away but he keeps them intertwined. “Bee?” He whispers to the girl that still has fear pulled across her face.

“ It’s here, Carl…” She tells the boy, finally drawing her gaze to him. “ It won’t leave me alone.” The girl nearly cries to her friend. 

And the confused boy merely stares at the girl as she looks back to the barn. Her gaze barely leaves it even as she is dragged away alongside Carl, Lori, and Glenn who leads the mother and children back to the camp. Rick and Shane remain to talk without spectators.

Tensely, the group goes about their day, their eyes glancing back-and-forth from their current task to the ticking time bomb that is a barn full of walkers. Rick walks inside the farmhouse, members of the Greene family leaving to their own chores, except Hershel, who sits at his grand dining room table eating cut fruit with a book spread open in his hands.

“A little light reading for lunch?” The sheriff questions lightly as he approaches the farmer’s right side. The room is flooded in the midday sun and calmness.

Hershel barely looks up to the man as his boots clink on the hardwood floors, “Been working so hard lately I get my studying where I can.” The Greene family was working hard tending to the vast fields and animals on the farm- repairing damage, milling the dirt, and preparing the farm for the approaching winter. The season would be on them faster than they realize.

Rick hooks his hands into his belt, “You know we can help you out with your work.”

Hershel finally raises his head, “It's my field to tend.” He states before continuing to eat his fruit chunks.

The men go quiet for a moment. “We found the barn.” Rick says gently.

“Leave it be.”

Rick stares at Hershel’s bowed head that continues reading his small book. “Well, I'd like to talk about it, but either way... your barn, your farm, your say. ” 

The farmer raises his head  “I don't want to talk about the barn. I don't want to debate.” His voice is firm but is tired, as though he has the weight of the world on his shoulders.

Rick shakes his head, “Not a debate- a discussion.” He needs this. His group needs this and they are going to figure it out one way or another. They can't go back out there not with… not with Lori being pregnant. God- she was so scared when Rick found her last night, down on her knees with a pile of vomit an arms length away. Rick had found the piles Glenn had scavenged for her, the three packages ripped open and empty laying on the table in their tent… what if Carl had seen them? Why didn’t she tell Rick?... It doesn't matter now. Lori wants the pregnancy, so they’re going to figure this out.

Hershel finally makes eye contact with Rick. “I need you and your group gone by the end of the week.” The farmer is final and smooth in his command.

Rick’s stomach doesn't drop at his command. “I talked to Dale. You and I have our differences with the way we look at the walkers. Those people, they may be dead, they may be alive.” He leans over the table, voice straining in seriousness, “But my people, us, we are alive right now, right here, right in front of you. You send us out there and that could change.” He tells the man.

Hershel and his people have been hidden on the farm, hidden from the horrors and truths of the new world. They’ve only seen the walkers as fully intact bodies… not ripped in half or missing legs or the skin burned off their bodies… but Hershel doesn't believe it. “I've given you safe harbor. I have turned my eyes to your small thefts. My conscience is clear.” He tells Rick seriously.

Rick pulls back slightly. “Thefts?”

The farmer nods his head gently, “Someone has been stealing gauze and tape.” Hershel looks deeply into Rick’s eyes, “If you can do that, I’m sure you will be fine.” 

Rick shakes his head, “This farm... This farm is special. You've been shielded from what's been going on out there.” He tells the man gently- he needs Hershel to understand the new reality. “Dale said you saw everything happen on the news. Well, it's been... It's been a long time since the cameras stopped rolling.” Hershel folds his book closed and leans back to listen to the sheriff’s words. “The first time I saw a walker it was just half a body snapping at me from the ground. My inclination wasn't to kill it… But what the world is out there isn't what you saw on TV. It is much much worse and it changes you. Either into one of them or something a lot less than the person you were.” Hershel’s face doesn’t change as he listens to Rick but he listens. “Please do not... do not send us out there again.” Ricks begs the man. “My wife's pregnant. That's either a gift here or a death sentence out there. If we were to stay we could help you with the work, with securing this place. We can survive together.” Rick begs Hershel, his chest twists so painfully as he speaks. He needs this farm and Hershel, Lori will need a doctor and a safe place. Her pregnancy with Carl wasn’t an easy one, especially the birth.

“Rick, I'm telling you we can't.”

Rick leans back, “You think about what you're doing.” He tells Hershel seriously.

“I've thought about it.”

“Think about it.” Rick tells his harsher.

Hershel responds in kind, “I've thought about it.”

Rick leans towards him, “Think about it again.” He spits harshly, “We can't go out there.” Rick eyes Hershel before turning and leaving the farmhouse. The old farmer would need time to think over their conversation and Rick had someone else to tend too.

The sun beats harshly onto his head as he approaches Shane. The man leans against the rickety wooden fence that surrounds the front of the barn. Shane offers Rick a slight turn of his head before turning his eyes back to the barn. “What's it gonna be, man? Which way does this thing go?” He asks into the air, hand resting on his weapon as though the barn would fall apart releasing the walkers.

“I don't know yet.” Rick sighs.

Shane turns to Rick now that he is an arm's length away. “Well, what did he say?” He questions.

“We're negotiating.”

Shane looks at Rick in disbelief, leaning forward and back before rubbing at his face, “You're nego-… Clock's ticking, Rick.” Shane tells him seriously.

“No it isn't, Shane.” Rick responds simply. He turns towards the barn and points at it, “That barn... The barn is secure. We didn't even know about it till this morning. We didn't.” 

“Well, we know about it now. Right?” Shane tells him in turn. “We know there's over a dozen walkers in there. We know that it's about a stone's throw from our camp, Rick... Where we sleep.” Shane couldn’t believe Rick was going to gamble with this. Sure the walkers are secure now but what if that changes; it’s just a wood barn. “So look, if we're not gonna go in there and clear it out then we just got to go.”

Rick shakes his head and stands between Shane and the barn, “We're not gonna clear it out and we're not gonna go.” 

The man sighs in annoyance, “We at least need our guns.”

“We can't have them, not here.” He tells him, looking down at the gun on Shane’s waist.

Shane paces lightly, the anger radiating off his skin. “Why do you want to stay here when it's not safe?” He asks Rick, walking back to the man.

“We can make it safe.”

“How are we gonna do that?”

“We will, okay?”

Shane shakes his head, “No, man, it's not okay.” He states in a raised voice.

Rick growls lightly, “Shane- Lori's pregnant .” His voice is raised but cut, freezing both men in their place, “We need to stay.” Rick tells him.

“We can find somewhere else.” Shane tells Rick, “A safer place- I’ve already been looking.”

Rick pulls back as Shane brushes the revelation away, “You knew?” He questions in a suspicious voice.

“Bella told me…” He tells the man. Rick raises his eyebrows in disbelief, “I don’t know how she found out.” 

Rick nods his head harshly. “Just… just let me figure this out.” He begs his brother. They could figure this out, Rick just needed a moment to think.

Shane nods to the man before he turns to head back towards camp. “Hey Rick?” Shane calls out, stopping Rick short. The man barely turns around to face Shane, “Congratulations- Lori’s having a baby.” 

“Thanks.” Rick continues his walks towards the camp and towards the children that sit in the field with a couple books and water bottles resting on the blanket they sit on.

Bella reads intently at a ‘medical book for dummies’ that she had stolen from the CDC. Carl next to her, barely, reads from his history book his mother had gotten from the RV. The pair had been silent since they were pulled away from the barn, silent as they sat down on the blanket, not a word spoken about what had happened. But what kind of friend would Carl be if he didn’t question Bella?

He snaps his book close. “Bee? What did you mean…” He starts freezing the girl in her reading. He clears his throat, “When you said ‘ it ’ was following you?”

Bella looks up quickly before looking back at her book and flipping the page, “Nothing… I was just scared.” She says simply.

“Yeah, I noticed.” Carl agrees, causing Bella to roll her eyes gently at him. Carl tosses his book away from himself, “I’ll just keep asking until you tell me…” He sings softly at her.

Bella sighs and closes the book, holding it tightly as an anchor. “Since you were shot… I feel like something…” She starts quickly. She looks towards Carl but doesn’t raise her eyes. “I feel like something is following me… hiding in the shadows.” Carl knows she is being honest as she finally meets his eyes, “Mostly my nightmares.” She tacks on.

Carl nods, “Have you told Shane?”

Bella shakes her head and tosses the book away, a loud thump coming from the book as it snaps on the ground, “I can’t tell my daddy about it.” She tells him.

“Why not? It’s Shane.”

Bella adjusts herself on the blanket- more comfortable now that she has finally said something… knowing Carl didn’t think her insane. “Our daddies have enough to worry about… they’re just some nightmares.” She tells him.

Carl doesn't believe her and they both know it; yes, their dads are busy but they’re their dads… they’ll always have time for them. “But you felt it when you were awake.” He states to the girl and she doesn’t respond- she doesn't know how to. “Maybe it’s an angel?” Carl offers her.

Bella laughs and drops her head to her shoulder, “An angel? You know I don’t really believe in that stuff.” She reminds Carl.

The boy shrugs in his seat and thinks back. “Well, mom says angels can be scary… but they still look over you when you need it.” He tells her, “Maybe it's just a scary angel that’s trying to protect you?” 

Bella nods in thought. “I like that better than anything I was thinking of.” She admits to him with a small smile.

They smile at each other in calmness and gratitude, they’ve been looking over each other, they have too.

Bella reaches for a book that she plans to read aloud, the same book she started some days ago when Carl was finally awake. But her plans are interrupted as Rick comes over to the pair. “Hey, Carl, Bella.” He starts to duo. Carl looks up to him with a smile. And Rick touches his head gently as he bends down next to the blanket. “Why don’t you go find your mom?” He tells Carl.

The boy looks between Bella and Rick, the girl has her head bowed away. “But we’re-” He starts.

“I need to talk to Bella.” Rick interrupts. Carl gives Bella a quick look but the smile she offers tells him to get up, that she’ll find him once his dad is done talking to Bella. He stands, adjusting his clothes before walking away back to the main camp where Lori works. Bella and Rick watch him leave. “Have you told Carl?” Rick asks the girl once he’s certain no one can hear them.

“No, Mr. Grimes.” She responds to the man’s still turned back.

He turns his head and looks pointedly at the girl, “Do you know anything else?” He questions.

“No.”

Rick gives the girl a knowing smile, “You're lying…” He says simply, “you need to work on that.” He tells her. The girl may be able to lie at times, like everyone, but this was not one of the times.

Bella sighs and looks up at the man. “What do you want me to say, Mr. Grimes?” She asks him but she turns her head past Rick’s shoulder to the quick approaching figure of her daddy.

He walks up quickly, “Bella.” The girl stands and gives the sheriff a small nod in goodbye before following after her daddy. They walk farther away from the camp. “What was Rick talking to you about?” He asks harshly looking at the now standing figure of Rick. The girl doesn’t respond fast enough for Shane, “Bella. I’m tired of this attitude.” He tells her but she remains quiet and Shane snaps. The man grabs harshly at Bella’s shoulders pulling her close. Shane may be dropped on his hunches, lower than Bella’s face, but his aura surrounds them. “Enough. Do you understand me?” He spits with a snap shake of her shoulders, Bella tries rolling them away from the pressure Shane’s fingers force on them. “You’re not grown. You aren’t right. You’re a child. A child that needs to remember their place.” He growls at the girl.

“I just want us to be safe.” She tells him quietly, pain slowly lacing her voice.

“That’s not your job!” He growls and his grip tightens even more causing the girl to whimper. “That’s my job! I keep us safe! I keep us fed and alive- not you.” He pulls her close, stopping her struggle to get away, “So stop acting like a whiny brat and act the way I raised you.” He commands her in a voice he’s never heard. 

Bella can’t believe how her daddy is acting. The pain he’s forcing into her shoulders and the harsh voice he speaks to her in. Why can’t he see she’s just trying to help? “You’re not my daddy…” She whispers to herself. It’s all her little mind could think… her daddy would never be like this so it must be someone else… someone wearing her daddy’s face. Shane tells her to repeat herself. “ You’re hurting me .” She cries and kicks away from the man. 

Shane grunts at the pain in his shin and looks in surprise and worry as Bella falls to the ground before jumping up and running towards the house where some of the group had gathered and she can see Carl standing.

Shane’s world twists in his vision and he walks forwards but the call from Glenn stops him. The young man stands atop the RV where Dale is meant to be. And Shane’s anger grows, telling the young man to go get him water leaving the watch to him.

Glenn nods concerned and goes to the house where Bella has run up the steps, tears beading in her eyes. “Bee?! What happened?!” Carl calls out from the living room where he sits.

The girl wipes harshly at her eyes and turns her back to him, “Noth-nothing… it’s nothing.”

Carl leaps from his seat and circles on the girl, “You’re crying… Bee?” He grabs at her hands and pulls them away from her face. And his grip tightens, “Your side is bleeding.” He tells her.

The girl pulls out a hand and touches her right hip where blood is soaking into her large shirt. The door of the house snaps closed as Glenn enters. His eyes almost jump out his head at the site of blood on Bella’s pale fingers and her crying form.

He calls out for Maggie who rushes over. “Maggie- get your dad.” He commands her and she rushes off at the site of the scene.

Glenn grabs the young girl picking up her shirt gently. “I’m fine, Mr. Glenn.” Bella says tiredly to the man.

“What happened?” Hershel calls coming into the main room.

Bella pulls away, “It’s old. I’m alright.” She sniffles wetly and wipes her face once more.

No one believes the girl and it doesn’t help as Lori comes inside too, Carl calling out to her. “Mom! Bella’s hurt!”

“I said ‘I’m fine’!” Bella shouts, pulling away. Shocked faces turn to the young girl as she grabs hard at the wound. “I’m fine- I’m fine…” She whispers to herself as tears fall once more, soaking her shirt as they fall.

Carl grabs Bella and leads her down to a seat Glenn had pulled forward. She drops harshly into it and Carl finds a place on her left side, a cover for her to curl up in. 

Hershel sits with his bag at his side. Glenn pulls gently at her shirt to give the doctor a view of the wound. “It’s not a bite.” Glenn tells the women that have gathered around.

Hershel works carefully. The wound is a deep red beading with falling blood, the skin around it is tender and bright red with irritation. The young girl barely moves even as Herhsel pulls at the torn scab that had ripped apart. “Now I know where my spare supplies have been going.” He says outloud and Bella doesn’t even turn her head. “Hold onto her. There’s a bullet fragment under her skin.” He tells Carl and Glenn who grasp tight onto the girl.

“Bullet?” Carl questions louder than the murmuring from the group.

“We’re twins…” Bella smiles into Carl’s shoulder.

Lori steps forward as Hershel cleans his twisters. “How could she-"

“The pieces I pulled from your son didn’t make a full bullet.” The doctor explains to the mother. He nods towards the two men that hold the girl and places a supporting hand against her stomach. The metal enters under the girl's skin, so thin and pale the metal’s gleam can be seen through it. “I had thought the other was stuck in the deer but it seems…” He comments as he latches onto the fragment and pulls it out. The girl doesn't move even as blood bubbles up from the wound and the clank of the fragment falls into the small metal dish. “It was here instead.”

Carl looks at Bella, “Doesn’t it hurt? You barely moved, Bee.”

“Of course it hurts… I just don’t care right now.” She says tiredly, her eyes burning red and puffy.

Hershel pulls his rubber gloves off with a snap and places gauze onto the wound. “You should’ve said something earlier. You’re lucky you haven’t got an infection.” He tells the young girl seriously.

She turns her head gently, “Carl needed help.”

“Stop saying that.” He says seriously.

“Never.”

Glenn helps pull the girl’s shirt down and looks towards Hershel in concern. “Is she okay?”

He nods, “She’ll be fine. The fragment was under the skin. It would’ve come out on its own.” He explains simply as he stands.

“Where’s her dad?” Maggie questions.

A bubbling cry is given in response as Bella curls tightly into Carl. The group goes silent as Glenn grabs Bella and carries her over to a room- the girl is heavy dead weight but she needs rest and she won’t move on her own. Carl follows close behind her and sits by her side even as she turns her back and cries into a pillow.

“What’s wrong with you?” Sophia calls out as she approaches dry land.

Bella stomps forward, “I said take it back!” 

“No! You’re not the boss of me.” She spits at the girl before turning and darting away.

“You’re going in the wrong direction!” Bella screams after her. She takes off after the girl, chasing her through the woods and bushes, quickly on her trail. “You’re going to get lost! You won’t last a minute out here!” She calls out. 

But Sophia doesn't respond, she just continues to run, darting around trees and leaping over rocks. The exhaustion Sophia had felt has bleed away and she moves with unfiltered energy. Bella gets closer, her fingers almost skin the girl’s back but a loud creak sounds through the woods.

Bella stumbles and trips over a root. Her body smacks hard into the ground and her ankle flares to life, pain coursing up her calf, the flesh beneath already swelling. 

Bella’s angry eyes jump up to watch Sophia disappear behind full bushes and trees, her baby blue shirt no longer visible. 

Bella growls in pain as she turns onto her butt, grasping tightly at the hot swelling of her ankle. It’s the sounds of voices that causes her to move, brushing the ground and hiding underneath some large brush. 

She can’t run… so she hides.

Chapter Text

“Man, this is a good hiding place.” Shane calls out into the marshland hidden away in the woods. “We ain't been in the swamps much, huh?” He questions the old man that stands ahead of him.

Dale turns his head towards the father, resting in his arms is a large trash bag, the camp’s gun supply within. The old man was going to bury them, hide them in the woods where no one could find them. But Shane caught him first. “Imagine if you applied your tracking skills to finding Sophia.” He responds curtly.

Dale can’t help the way he tenses in the sight of the other man. His eyes are crazed and his hands twitch as he speaks, “How about you just give me that bag, huh?” Commands Shane, rather than question.

“I'm not gonna do that.” Dale shakes his head and holds tighter to the bag.

Shane gives him a smile, impressed with the other man’s boldness. “Yeah you are, Dale.” He tells him. Shane’s eyes raise up to weapon slinged across Dale’s shoulders as the man slowly puts the bag of guns on the ground, resting against a tree. “Unless, well… you do have that rifle over your shoulder.” He goads.

“You gonna shoot me like you did Otis?” Dale comments at Shane, the air tensing even more, going ice cold. “Tell another story?”

Shane gives him a crazed smile, “No, man.” Shane rolls his shoulders and Dale tenses, “Hell, when you really look at it in the cold light of day, you're pretty much dead already.” Dale just stares at the man. “Just give me the guns. Do it now.”

“You think this is gonna keep us safe?”

“Mm-hmm. I know it is.”

“Rick is trying to get Hershel…”

“Dale, shut up.” Shane spits and takes another step closer. “Just shut up and give me the guns.”

Dale’s mouth pulls tight and his hands raise the rifle on his body. He points it towards Shane and the man gives a crooked grin in return. “Am I gonna have to shoot you? Do I have to kill you? Is that what it's gonna take?” Dale questions, a beg hidden underneath his tone.

“Yeah. That's what it's gonna take.” He tells.

But Dale can’t. He can’t pull the trigger even in the face of the man who was slowly going crazy in front of him. “This is where you belong, Shane.” He tells the man honestly.

Shane tilts his head, “How's that, Dale?”

“This world, what it is now, this is where you belong.” He takes a small step forward and points at himself, “And I may not have what it takes to last for long, but that's okay.” Shane listens, uncaring. “'Cause at least I can say when the world goes to shit I didn't let it take me down with it.” He tells Shane who rolls his eyes. “I just pray you don’t pull your daughter down with you.”

The father steps up face to face with the old man, faster than he can blink, almost at inhuman speed. “Say something about my daughter again and I’ll tell another tale.” Shane growls.

He grabs harshly at the bag and turns away, back towards the farm. Shane’s hand grip and rip at the plastic covering, revealing all the weapons underneath. The farm was going to be cleared, now. Today.

They can’t wait. He can’t wait.

And Rick… Rick will have to deal with it because Shane’s doing this. If the sheriff won’t take control- the deputy will.

Scraps of plastic hit the ground as Shane continues his hard trek towards the farmhouse where everyone is gathering on the steps.

“What's all this?” Daryl questions, as he approaches. 

Digging into the satchel bag, Shane drags a shotgun and hands it out towards the redneck. “You with me, man?”

“Yeah.”

The deputy pulls out more weapons and approaches, “Time to grow up." He calls out to the group. He approaches the steps, “You already got yours?” He questions Andrea.

“Yeah. Where's Dale?” She responds.

“He's on his way.”

T-dog grabs at the weapon Shane hands him, turning it over. “Thought we couldn't carry.”

“We can and we have to.” He calls out, looking around. “Look, it was one thing sitting around here picking daisies when we thought this place was supposed to be safe. But now we know it ain't.” Maggie, standing next to Glenn, watches in disbelief as the weapons are handed out and the people take them willingly. “How about you, man? You gonna protect yours?” Shane offers it to Glenn. The young man gives Maggie a sad sideways look before grabbing the rifle. Shane smiles, “That's it. Can you shoot?”

“Can you stop?” Maggie shoots back quickly. “You do this, you hand out these guns, my dad will make you leave tonight.” She tells him seriously.

Carl moves down a few steps, “We have to stay, Shane.”

Lori rushes from the house and down the steps to Carl. “What is this?” She questions grabbing her son’s shoulder.

And Shane doesn’t turn his head to the mother, just bends to his hunches and hands out a small revolver to the boy. “We ain't going anywhere, okay? Now look, Hershel, he's just gotta understand.” He tells Carl and the group; Hershel, Rick and Jimmy are nowhere to be seen. “Okay? He... Well, he's gonna have to. Now we need to find Sophia. Am I right?” He questions moving the gun closer to the boy, “Huh? Now I want you to take this. You take it, Carl, and you keep your mother safe. You do whatever it takes.” Carl looks down at the weapon, “You know how. Go on, take the gun and do it.”

Lori pulls Carl behind her back, blocking the boy from Shane’s view. “Rick said no guns.” She tells him as he stands tall. “This is not your call. This is not your decision to make .” She spits at him and his gaze doesn’t change in the face of the woman.  “ Your daughter was shot. ” She tells him, causing a crack to form on his face, “A piece of the bullet that hit Carl, hit her too. Did you know?” The mother questions the father.

Shane stumbles in the revelation. His tongue is tied tight as he searches Lori’s face, and he knows it’s true. She was shot.

His little girl was shot.

The sound of the door snapping closed breaks the silence as Bella walks on the porch. Shane’s blurring eyes find his little girl standing there. Her eyes are blood red from crying and her skin has gone pale but she’s walking… her face isn’t twisted in pain- only exhaustion.

And before Shane can speak, before he can say to hell with clearing the barn, T-Dog calls out, “Oh shit.”

Everyone looks to where the man points. Approaching the barn is Hershel, Rick and Jimmy, dragging two walkers along. “What the hell are they doing?” Shane growls and his feet run fast towards the group. The living bodies follow the steaming man closely.

Rick and Hershel have two walkers stuck on snare poles, the rope tight around the necks of the dead. And Jimmy acts as a carrot, leading the walkers forwards towards the barn doors. Rick swears under his breath at the shouts and stomping of approaching bodies.

“Shane, just back off.” The sheriff screams as the group surrounds the dead.

Hershel holds tight to his pole as the female walker fights hard to get a meal. “Why do your people have guns?” He questions.

Shane steams as he paces, eyes going crazy.  “Are you kidding me? You see? You see what they're holding onto?” He calls to the group.

“I see who I'm holding onto.” Hershel responds.

“No, man, you don't.” Shane shouts at the old man.

Rick’s grip goes white on his pole,  “Shane, just let us do this and then we can talk.”

The man continues pacing back and forth, cutting off the way to the barn. “What you want to talk about, Rick? These things ain't sick. They're not people.” He shouts. “They're dead. Ain't gonna feel nothing for them 'cause all they do, they kill!” Members of the Atlanta group nod in agreement. “These things right here, they're the things that killed Amy. They killed Otis. They're gonna kill all of us.” 

“Shane, shut up!” Rick screams.

Shane huffs a laugh and pulls the weapon from his hip, “Hey, Hershel man, let me ask you something.” He calls out, gun loose in his grip. “Could a living breathing person, could they walk away from this?” The gun is raised swiftly. Bang! Bang! Bang! “That's three rounds in the chest.” The female walker on Hershel’s pole snaps back at the force of the shots but it doesn't stop. It growls and hisses at the living, hand digging in the air. “Could someone who's alive, could they just take that?!” He calls out to the man who looks at the walker in numbness- the body that takes two more shots to the body and continues fighting without a care. “Why is it still coming?” Another two shots. “That's its heart, its lungs. Why is it still coming?” Shane screams to him.

“Shane, enough!” Rick shouts.

He huffs and drops his arm, approaching the walker. “Yeah, you're right, man. That is enough.” His gun raises long enough for the shot to snap the walker’s head back and drop it to the ground for good. Everyone, Atlanta group and Greene family, look on in horror as Shane continues. “Enough risking our lives for a little girl who's gone!” He shouts, not noticing the flinch from Carol. “Enough living next to a barn full of things that are trying to kill us. Enough!” He looks at Rick,  “Rick, it ain't like it was before!” He turns his attention to everyone else. “Now if y'all want to live, if you want to survive, you gotta fight for it!” He screams, hopping from foot to foot, “I'm talking about fighting right here, right now.” Shane darts towards the barn.

Rick screams louder than anyone, “No, Shane. Do not do this, brother. Wait! Don't do it!” He begs out to Shane who grabs at a pickaxe to smash the lock. Other screams join his, all of them telling Shane to leave the barn alone, but the man doesn’t listen. All he hears is red. “Hershel, take the snare pole.” Rick begs as the man at the barn continues trying to break the lock. “Hershel, listen to me, man, please. Take it now. Hershel!” Rick cries to the man.

But it’s too late as the smashing stops. 

The metal chain drags out and piles onto the ground. And Shane darts a distance back and raises his gun, goating the walkers out under his breath.

Everyone holds their breath waiting… and a hand curls around the wooden door. The male walker drags itself out from the darkness with a growl. As the door opens wide enough, it finally pulls through darting towards Shane and the group.

Bang! 

A single shot from Shane drops the walker to the ground and begins the flood in full.

Growls of all types fill the air as the bodies rush out. Shane’s gun fires off at the approaching bodies. The squelch and splatter of dead flesh hitting the ground louder than the shots themselves.

Andrea comes close with her own gun raised on Shane’s right, T-Dog pulls to the man’s left, shots ringing out at an uneven rhythm. And with the shots and squelching of torn apart flesh, cries join in the air. 

Maggie grips tight to her little sister as they both cry from their spot on the ground. Glenn apologizes to the brown haired woman before joining the shooting party, she gives him an understanding nod.

Hershel rests on his knees as he watches his family and friends get slaughtered. As the Atlanta group shoots each one with no empathy or care.

Shane turns his head back to Rick, the man still standing with the snare pole, a raise of his hand drops the walker attached. The deputy turns back and continues the massacre until there is no more.

There’s nothing… nothing besides the cries of Beth and Maggie. No more growls. No more shots. No more dead.

Shane looks at the fallen bodies, and the shield of shooters loosen their grips.

The door creaks…

Eyes snapping to the barn, everyone watches as a single hand pushes at the door. A hand smaller than the others… younger.

The walker steps into the light with its opposite arm raised towards the sun in muscle memory. And no one raises their guns… they just watch as the walker shows its face and moves closer.

“Sophia?” Carol's voice cries and the mother darts forward towards the dead girl. Daryl drops his gun fast enough to grip tight at the woman, arms wrapped so tight around her as they fall to the ground. “Sophia!” She cries painfully.

Cries so painfully it twists everyone’s chest. Lori grabs tight to Carl and pulls him down, turning the boy’s head away, he cries into his mother’s chest.

The walker, the once alive Sophia, stumbles forward through the fallen bodies. Growling softly at everyone, her pace is slow as she finds her way through the maze of limbs. 

No one can raise their gun. 

They just watch as she draws closer.

A holster unhooks and Rick draws forward. The man’s shoulder brushes against Shane’s as he passes. Rick can’t help the shake in his hands as he picks his gun up to the girl’s head. 

Dead or alive, it looks like a little girl.

A little girl they know… a little girl they knew.

“Don't watch.” Daryl tells the mother that stretches her hand out to her lost daughter as she draws closer. 

Sophia’s corpse passes the last fallen body, no longer stumbling with the open floor.

BANG! 

Rick’s revolver snaps… and Sophia’s body falls to the ground. Her young limbs spilling outward with no cause- any life that may have existed… is gone. And the cries become louder.

“I don’t think It’s an angel, Carl.” Bella says out loud to the boy. His tearful eyes find the girl’s dry ones.

Chapter Text

The Greene family stumbles their way up towards their home. Grasping tight to each other as dry cries hiccup from their mouths. Beth is the worst of the family, the young girl had gone after her fallen mother but she wasn’t dead- the walker had grappled to get a piece of flesh from its, once, daughter. 

But the family can’t mourn… not as Shane trails after them with others trying to pull him away, “We've been out. We've been combing these woods looking for her and she was in there all along?” He shouts at Hershel as he holds onto Beth. “ You knew.” He accuses with a sharp finger pointing their way. 

Maggie turns her head, “Leave us alone.”

“Hey, Shane, just stop, man.” Glenn tries grabbing at the man’s shoulder but he’s brushed off as quickly as he comes.

“Get your hands off me.” Shane growls and continues alongside the family. “You knew and you kept it from us.” He calls again angrily.

“I didn't know.” Hershel tells honestly. The family hadn’t known, they had opened their home to the Atlanta group because they wanted to help- they didn’t know.

But Shane… Shane doesn’t believe a word that comes out of their mouths. “That's bullshit. I think y'all knew.” He spits.

“We didn't know!”

“Why was she there?!”

Hershel turns to the group, leading Beth up the stairs alongside Jimmy who grabs the girl quickly. “Otis put those people in the barn.” He tells the small group of men that were gathered. “Maybe he found her and put her in there before he was killed.” He offers painfully.

Shane steps forward, “You expect me to believe that? Do I look like an idiot?”

And Hershel takes a step in turn, unfrightened by the crazed and angry man in front of him, “I don't care what you believe!”

Rick moves quickly between the two, “Everybody just calm down.”

 “Get him off my land!”

Shane moves forward, “Let me tell you something-”

“Hey!” Maggie shouts and delivers a swift smack to Shane’s face. “Don't touch him!” The man steps back- the hit hadn’t hurt one bit but it had taken him by surprise. The farmer’s daughter had a swift tongue when she wanted to but she had never been so forward. “Haven't you done enough?” She spits before turning around and ascending the stairs.

“I mean it…” Hershel tells them. “Off my land.” And they watch as the whole Greene family disappear into their house.

The door snaps closed and the air heats everyone’s skin, the adrenaline of the massacre diluting in their veins. Shane turns and stalks off back towards the barn. Rick moves quickly at Shane’s side. “What are you doing?” Shane doesn’t turn and Rick grabs his shoulder whipping the man around to face him. “Hey, what are you doing?” He hisses.

Shane gets close to the sheriff’s face, “Daryl almost died looking for her, Rick. Any one of us could have. I'm gonna tell you right now…” He points at the house in disgust. “That son of a bitch, he knew.”

“He didn't know. He's not like that.” Rick responds in disbelief. “He opened his home to us.”

“He put us all in danger. Man, he kept a barn full of walkers.”

Rick raises his eyebrows and his hands around to the situation that now surrounds them, “So you just start an insurrection, hand out guns and massacre his family?”

Shane’s mouth pulls tight, “His family's dead, Rick.”

“Well, he doesn't believe that.” He shoots back quickly, “He thinks you just murdered them in cold blood.”

“No, man, I don't care what he thinks.” Shane dismisses the man that is begging him to understand the gravity of the thing he’s done.

“I was handling it, brother. I was handling it and you just…”

Shane pushes finger into Rick's chest, “You had us out in those woods looking for a little girl that every single one of us knew was dead !” He spits without care, a flare of heat coursing through his chest at the flinch Rick lets slip on his face. “That's what you did. Rick, you're just as delusional as that guy.” He huffs a laugh and walks away, “You're handling it, huh?” He continues laughing in disbelief.

And the group starts to clean up the mess.

There are two dozen rotting corpses that filtered out of the barn and now layed dead, finally dead, on the dirt ground, seeping diseased blood into the earth. Few words are shared about the Atlanta group as they begin separating bodies best they could… people they, and the Greenes, cared for and the strangers. 

Andrea pulls a blue pick-up truck around to the barn entrance to pile the bodies in. Lori had led Carol away from the scene, releasing her into the RV- the mother insisted she be left alone. 

Back at the barn, living bodies grapple at the dead ones, picking up the pieces and throwing them into pills. Bella and Carl had found their way inside the open barn, the area double checked by Daryl and T-Dog before they entered. 

The duo drifts around the area, looking around at everything inside in relative silence.  “I really thought I’d be the one to find her…” Carl says into the air. From across the barn, Bella turns her head and drifts over to the boy as his hand picks a tool hanging on the barn wall, “hiding in a tree or a cave, maybe.” Lori listens from the barn opening… she watches as the two stand side by side. “Shane did the right thing… I just-” He tells his friend. “I would’ve done the same thing as dad.” Lori can’t stop the shock that draws across her face at her son’s revelation.

Bella doesn’t seem shocked like the woman, more… conflicted. “She doesn’t have to be afraid anymore, Carl.” She tells him.

They share a look, one they have shared more than once, a look of peace and security. The kids had been together since their beginning, they’ve experienced many difficult situations together- none as difficult as this- but it doesn’t matter because they're together. That’s all that matters.

The day continues on as the smell of decay turns sour under the beating sun, even with the season turning to fall the open field was not kind when the sun was above. The group holds a ceremony, the Greenes and the Atlanta group gather together to mourn the losses, a sour tension in the air… Carol isn’t there, neither is Daryl.

The mismatched duo had a tension between them; Daryl had tried so hard to find Sophia, like she was his own, and Carol… Carol wished so badly to find her daughter. But they found her corpse. A corpse that had turned… a corpse with its shoulder ripped open by a bite. It wasn’t Sophia… it wasn’t Carol’s little girl. Not anymore. Carol accepted that but Daryl couldn’t.

Leaving the small ceremony, the group tries going back to chores. Beth stands inside the kitchen rubbing a damp dish cloth over a plate as Glenn and Maggie converse silently in the living room. The crash and shatter of the ceramic dish causes the duo to jump and look over to watch Beth fall to her knees and collapse.

The air goes frantic as they bring Beth to her room, the girl stuck in a catatonic state, her skin pale and dewey, eyes glassy. The house is torn apart looking for Hershel, the doctor the only one that can help the girl. But he’s gone.

Left into town without telling anyone, all to go find a drink.

“Rick? You want to have a conversation about this before you leave?” Shane questions Rick as the man and Glenn prepare to go after the doctor. “So you're seriously gonna go after this guy with everything that's going on, huh?” He asks.

Lori stands to his other side, hand touching Rick’s chest as a sign to stop for just a moment. “He's right. This is not the time to head off, not today.”

“I'm not arguing. It's the least I can do for Hershel after we…”

“What?” Shane cuts off, “After we, what?”

Lori’s face turns sour in pain,  “Carl said he would've shot Sophia himself.” She tells him seriously, “That's your son. He's getting cold. He's growing up in a world with…” Lori’s breath shakes for a moment. “He's growing up in a world where he needs a father like you… Around, alive, not running off, solving everybody else's problems.”

Rick pulls close to Lori, others of the group slowly approaching the trio. “It's not just his problem I'm trying to solve. We need Hershel for the baby.” He tells his wife, “I'm going after him.” He finalizes to everyone and Shane’s scoff is the only thing that is heard in response.

Shane storms away before Rick and Glenn can even leave, pacing the border of the farm deep in thought. His eyes connect with the well pump in the hidden corner he’s in. Approaching, he pumps the lever hard to pull the hidden water to the surface- thankfully this pump is hidden in the ground so the risk of another walker tainting the water is close to zero… hopefully.

The water bursts from the paint chipping pump in strong bursts. Shane cups his shaking hands underneath to poorly catch the cool water and with his hands filling quickly he splashes the water at his face, rubbing the cold into his burning head. 

Bent down at the pump, Shane rests in thought, so deep in thought he doesn’t know how long he’s rested there- not long based on moist water marks on the ground- nor does he realize the small cracks and russles coming from the woods.

His eyes catch the sight of a body pulling themselves tiredly out of the woods. Shane’s head jumps up quickly tracking the body as his hand touches his gun in reflex. 

But the body isn’t a rotting corpse or a enemy of any kind; it’s Carol. 

The mother drags herself painfully out of the trees, her clothes are covered in dirt and her fingers are tainted as well. Dirt stuck so deep underneath her nails it must be painful. And Shane feels a twist in his chest at the sight. 

He could be grieving like Carol is now. His little girl could’ve been in that barn too. “Carol?” He calls gently as he raises to his feet. The woman barely raises her head in response, she just continues her unsteady walk. “Carol. Hey hey hey… are you alright?” Shane grips softly at the mother’s shoulder, soft but firm. “Come here.” Shane’s face twists in concern as he leads her over to the well pump he just sat at. Moving the wooden bucket upside down, Shane motions for Carol to sit, she thumps down in exhaustion. Carol’s eyes drift in a different world as Shane pumps the lever once more and gathers water in a second bucket. Kneeling infornt of Carol, Shane holds the woman’s hands and slowly rubs water on the dirt that clings to the woman. “I want you to know that I'm really sorry for your girl.” He says.

“Thank you.” Carol slowly comes back with the pressure of Shane’s hands and the coldness of the water.

Shane can barely look into her eyes as he speaks, his hands merely continue their job of washing the dirt from Carol’s. “When I opened that barn I had no idea. If I did… Everybody thinks that I'm a…” The man takes a deep breath as Carol’s eyes burn a hole into his forehead. “I was just trying to keep everybody safe. I had no idea she was in there.”

Carol nods and grasps tightly at Shane’s hand for a moment, “It’s okay… I needed to know.”

Shane can’t stop his head from shaking back and forth. “Not like that- never like that… if it was Bella…” The man’s voice cracks painfully at the thought of his daughter’s corpse stumbling out of the barn instead of Sophia. “You’re strong- stronger than me. I don’t think anyone’s ever told you that.” 

The woman smiles painfully at him, “I’m grateful that one of our daughters survived.”

“It should’ve been both.”

Carol nods painfully in agreement as a tear slips down her cheek. Her daughter was gone, dead- probably dead the day she was lost… and she was rotting in that barn. But Carol… she can’t help but be happy… happy to know her daughter wasn’t afraid anymore; afraid, cold, hungry… she didn’t have to be scared anymore.

“Daddy…” A small voice calls out breaking the parents from their small silence. Bella drifts forward as they raise her head to the girl. Grasped tight in her hands is a bundle of random flowers. “I’m sorry, Mrs. Carol…” She speaks towards the woman. Her hand, dirty like Carol’s, hands the flower bundle to the grieving mother. Carol’s hand quivers as she accepts the offering. “I wish I could’ve- could’ve done something… more.” Bella says quietly.

Carol smiles down at the flowers- she had just destroyed an entire meadow of flowers but these… she won’t destroy these. “You did everything you could, sweetie.” Her voice is gentle and Bella offers her a grateful smile.

With Carol’s hands clean, the father and daughter lead the woman back towards the camp. They walk in comfortable silence as they move. Carol gives both of them a tight hug and kiss to the cheek in thankfulness as she walks into the RV, the flowers in her hands dropped into a plastic cup of water quickly.

Shane closes the door behind the mother and grabs underneath his daughter's arms picking her up swiftly. Bella fights gently in suprise but relaxes as her dad leads her towards a more secluded tree.

Underneath a large weeping willow, Shane sets Bella down gently and he drops to butt to lean against the tree’s roots. Bella copies her dad easily and they stare into the farm’s fields. “I don’t know what to say…” Shane starts carefully, “I’m- I’m sorry, Princess… for everything.” He peaks a glance towards his little girl only to find her already starring at him.

“It’s fine, daddy.”

Shane shakes his head harshly, “No, it isn’t. And we both know it.” Bella’s eyes drop with barely visible agreement. Shane laughs as his hand finds her hair, tied messily into a bun. “You’re such a smart girl… and I forget it all the time.” The air around the pair quiets as he speaks, “I love you… so much. You are everything to me, my sweet girl. And I don’t tell you enough.” He tells her. “The rest of them… they- they don’t matter to me. Just you .” Both hands find Bella’s face and he turns to fully face her, “And I won’t leave you… ever .” He promises strongly.

And he waits.

Because Bella is just staring at him, her eyes and face telling him nothing of what she was thinking. 

His heart drops as she stands up, his hands falling to her forearms in barely concealed terror.

Bella gives him a bright smile and she dives into his chest in a tight hug, tighter than she’s ever clinged to him. “I love you too, daddy.” She speaks into his neck.

Shane grasps at the back of her head and buries his own face into her shoulder. “I’m so sorry I hurt you, Princess.” He tells her before pulling them apart enough for him to look down. “I’m going to make this right, I promise.”

“I believe you, daddy.” She goes back to his chest. “As long as you're here with me.”

Shane rests his cheek against the top of her head, “I won’t ever leave you. I’ll make sure of that.”

Bella can’t help but listen to the steadiness of his heart as he speaks.

Chapter Text

The day turns to night once more and the group is gathered inside the farmhouse and around the dining tables. The nights have gotten much colder, and it was best for everyone to get the warmest meal possible before they went to sleep.

Bella had eaten her meal faster than anyone, her portion disappeared long before everyone had gotten their own so now, she rests against her daddy with Carl on her other side. And the table is silent, only the chewing and clinking of dinner heard inside the house. 

“Carl, I want you to keep your head up, okay?” The man speaks leaning gently towards Carl. Rick had yet to return with Glenn and Hershel, and everyone was starting to worry. The town wasn’t far away, and Hershel was an older man- they should’ve been back already. “Your old man, he's the toughest son of a-”

“No cussing in the house.” Patricia interrupts Shane’s words swiftly. 

And the man gives a meek nod, “Sorry.” It was surprising to most of the group that Shane was even welcomed into the house with what happened at the barn, but no one wanted to fight at this point. The exhaustion of the recent days has caught up with everyone and they wanted the fighting over.

Carol comes into the home to join the meal and leans into the room Carl had taken residence in, connected near the dining room. “Lori, dinner.” She calls into the room, her hand cracking the door open a small sliver to speak through.

Maggie takes a sip of water and peaks over her shoulder, “She's not in there.” She says dropping the glass back to the wooden table.

Everyone pauses for a moment. “Where is she?” Shane questions Maggie but the woman can only shrug. Looking around the table everyone stares in concern, unknowing to the woman’s location. Placing his utensils to his plate, Shane holds his hands together and looks towards the young boy at Bella’s side. “Carl, when's the last time you saw your mom?” He asks.

Carl looks concerned and confused at the man, “This afternoon.”

“She was worried about Rick,” Andrea comments, “asked me to look in on Carl.”

Shane rubs his face hoping to relieve some tension. “She went after them?” Carol questions in concern moving close to the table. Everyone looks around the table all thinking the same thing, Lori left without telling anyone. She was so concerned about Rick leaving, she went to everyone she could to ask them to go after her husband- but no one wanted to… so she left by herself. 

The pregnant woman, a terrible shot, and a mother trying to fix all her problems went out into the world with no one and nothing by her side.

“She didn't say that.”

Everyone begins to stand in worry, “Nobody panic.” Shane calls and throws down his napkin. “Gonna be around here somewhere.”

And the house goes into a frenzy, searching everywhere for Lori. There are only so many places she could be, yet she can’t be found; she’s not in the house, in the tents, in the barn, or the chicken coop… She was gone along with Maggie’s car.

The group regathers at the front of the house and Shane asks T-Dog to pull a car around front for him. He was going to go find her. 

Daryl had informed the group that Lori approached him to go after Rick and Glenn, but he wasn’t going to go searching for people anymore.

Watching the car lights disappear once more, Bella stands alongside Carl, their hands gripping the house’s porch railing. Carl swallows thickly and blinks in rapid succession as he stares into the darkness, “What if she’s dead?” He says into the darkness.

Bella looks over and sees the despair written across the boy’s face. “She’s not dead. If your dad could survive a coma and find you, I’m certain she’s just as strong.”

Carl peaks over and gives a grateful smile. “Shane’s going after her… she’ll be fine.” His words are more meant for him, and they both know it. Neither of them knew they were going to be thrown into this world but here they are growing up quickly in hopes of surviving. “Are you okay?” Carl questions into the darkness.

“I’m fine.”

The boy rolls his eyes at Bella’s tone, “I mean your side.” He restates.

She sighs and stands up from her lean against the railing, her hand absentmindedly touches her side, “I’m okay, it wasn’t that bad.” She assures him with a little grin.

Carl mockingly laughs at Bella’s joking tone, “Yeah, rub it in my face.” The kids go back to looking into the dark fields, the full moon that rests in the sky above isn’t enough to light the air and relieve the strain on their eyes. “Is it still here?” Carl whispers between them.

The silence that follows is all the answer Carl needs. His worry for Bella was growing, first lying about her side and not talking about this thing that’s following her, she’s getting jumpy. Carl’s never seen her jumpy.

“Where is it?” Carl asks.

Bella huffs and turns her head, “You’re making me sound crazy.” She accuses.

“You are crazy.”

Bella’s eyes go sharp, “I’d punch you if you weren’t still hurt.” Carl laughs in turn and bumps the girl with his shoulder.

“Sophia’s dead.” Bella looks at Carl’s face. “And you’re acting differently…” Carl’s eyes find Bella’s face. “Mom’s missing-” His voice cracks painfully.

“Your mom is going to be fine.” Bella assures stopping his words. “Our daddies and your mom will be back soon with Mr. Glenn and Mr. Hershel… they will.” 

Carl gives Bella a nod in agreement and looks back into the darkness- Bella’s eyes don’t leave Carl's face.

The silence that follows fills their ears. The ringing of nothingness drilling into their ears and filling their minds. 

Their minds race with possibilities; their parents not coming back, only one of them coming back, or maybe they all come back but things become even more tense… Carl can’t deny the tension he feels around the parents- he can’t understand why? 

Carl’s mind jumps from possibility to possibility the longer the silence drones on- the long minutes feel like eternity. He turns his eyes slowly to his friend that stands looking out into darkness waiting for the lights of her daddy’s car. He wants to speak, his mouth gapes uselessly as he tries to find the words on the tip of his tongue.

But they don’t come. Carl’s mouth just snaps close. 

“It’s in the trees…” Bella whispers. Carl turns his head and stares the same as his friend, out into the nothing of the fields. “It’s not hiding anymore… just watching.” Carl’s face twists in concern at her answer. 

Carl’s chest twists painfully in thought; he should tell Shane… or someone. He has to.

“No one else knows.” Bella speaks, breaking his train of thought. His concerned eyes turn to find Bella staring intently at him with a knowing look drawn across her face. He won’t tell anyone- they made a silent promise to each other. Carl gives her a small nod in understanding as the field lights up. 

Excitement fills their chests and Bella calls out to the house. The remaining adults come pouring out of the front door, T-Dog and Andrea bearing their weapons taking the lead down the steps.

But the sight of Shane’s car and the two figures inside loosen the tension in their shoulders, “Oh my God, are you alright? What happened?” Andrea cries at the sight of a roughed-up Lori. 

The woman sports a gash atop her head with a trail of blood staining the side of her face. Her clothes are ripped and torn in places and her right hand is covered in sickly blood. But she still raises her hand in an action of muting the worry. “I was in an accident. I'm fine, I'm fine.” Carl rushes forward and gathers his mom in a hug with Shane giving her a look. “I really am.” She stresses before asking, “Where's Rick?” The group shakes their heads- he wasn’t back. Why did she think they were back? Lori’s face turns mean, and she rounds on Shane who slowly walks towards Bella. “They're not back? Where are they?” She demands an answer at his back.

Shane touches his daughter’s hair gently as she hugs him tight. “Look, I had to get you back here.” He explains as Bella pulls back to stand by his side.

“You asshole.” Lori hisses, her feet approaching slowly. “He's my husband.” She spits at him.

Shane nods, “Lori, I will go after him. I will find him. Hey! Now look, first things first…” He holds his daughter tight in one arm and waves with his other. “I gotta... I gotta look after you. I gotta make sure the baby's all right, okay?” 

The group freezes as one. Shane’s revelation takes them all by surprise. Lori is pregnant. She’s pregnant, quite obviously newly pregnant given her thin figure has yet to show the growth of the pregnancy. 

Lori’s chest fills with betrayal, how dare Shane out her like that in front of everyone? Her mouth opens to resort, but Carl’s voice calls out first. “You're having a baby?” He asks in a mixture of excitement and sadness, “Why didn't you tell me?”

And Lori can only look down at her son, as nothing comes to her mind. But Carol comes to the rescue. “Come on. Let's make sure you're alright.” She speaks, grabbing lightly at Lori’s arm and leading her back to the house. Everyone trailing behind them.

Dale, Carol, Andrea, Lori, and Carl find their way into a smaller living room of the house. Lori resting against the pale blue loveseat with Carl on her right. She brushes his hair lovingly, “I am so sorry that I left without telling you.” 

The boy gives his mom a small smile, “It's okay. I wasn't scared.” He tells her and moves closer to her side, “When's dad getting back?”

“Let's hope soon.” She offers him a small smile.

And Carl nods, “I wanna be there when you tell him about the baby.” He tells her.

Lori scrunches her face, “Oh, love, he already knows.” She tells his son, who stares at her. “We were just trying to find the right time to tell you.” She speaks carefully as though she was worried something was going to interrupt her.

“Is it a boy or a girl?”

Lori shrugs and leans back, “Well, we won't know that until it's born.”

Carl moves his hand to touch at his mom’s stomach, his palm laid flat, “Will I be able to feel it?” He asks excitedly, he tried hard to contain it, but it could be felt by everyone in the room.

Lori gives her boy a smile, “Not for a while.” Her hand absentmindedly continues playing with Carl’s growing hair, “You must have a lot of questions, huh?” She questions out loud before slowly looking over to the others in the room, “We never had ‘ the talk ’.” Lori finds Dale’s smirking face, “I guess we forgot.” She laughs and Dale gives her a comforting smile.

Carl looks over to Dale like his mom. “Don't look at me. That's your father's job.” He tells the boy and rests against the table in the room, taking the pressure off his tired knees.

Carl nods in understanding and plays with the tips of his fingers, “If the baby's a girl, can we name her Sophia?” Carol can’t help the bolt of warmth she feels in her chest. But before Lori can respond, Bella and Shane make their way into the room. Carl snaps his head over quickly, “Big brother Carl. Pretty cool, huh? Mom’s having a baby.” He tells the girl happily. 

“I know.” She responds with a smile sitting in an old cushioned chair.

“You knew?!” The boy asks in shock.

Bella nods seriously, “I learned about it today.” Her face breaks into a small smile, “Same time you did I think.” She jokes.

Carl huffs and smacks her knee- Lori scolded him lightly for that. “I thought you knew before me!” He claims loudly with a breath of relief. 

Bella had tricked him into thinking she knew before him. “That was the point.” She jokes. 

She doesn’t have the heart to tell him she knew. That she knew Lori was pregnant, that she doesn't know who the father is… that she tried to kill her baby. Because Carl’s smile is better than his frown.

Shane smiles at the pair as he stands tall, “Carl, Bella, could you give Lori and I a moment?” He asks seriously. And the pair nod in understanding, racing away to start thinking of names and what the baby was gonna look like. Andrea, Carol, and Dale all make their way slowly out of the room leaving the tension riddled duo inside. Shane releases a hard sigh as the door to the room clicks closed. And Lori goes to stand, “How about you... how about you just hear me out, please?” Shane begs, his body blocking her escape from the room. “Okay, Lori, it was a lie. It was one little white lie. But I think that…” He huffs, “I think you oughta be thinking about how lucky we are that your baby's safe.”

And Lori… she can’t help her disbelief and stands tall against Shane, “You just can't stop lying, can you?” She spits at the man who shrinks back slightly, “My husband is back safe and sound. My husband is dead in some hospital.” She recounts his words- his lies.

Shane can’t help but roll his eyes, “Oh, when are you gonna... when are you gonna stop throwing that in my face, huh? I thought that he was…” His words are choked out. He thought Rick was dead- he thought his best friend, his brother was dead, and he had his daughter, Carl and Lori to worry about. But he wasn’t and Lori won’t stop blaming him. Rubbing at his face he looks down at the woman, “The point here, Lori, is that you cannot keep running off like that.” Lori is silent looking to the floor. “What were you thinking?”

Her gaze raises gently, “I was thinking we needed Rick here to keep us safe.”

The silence that follows sits in the room like spikes. “Rick?” Shane huffs before moving close to Lori. “I keep you safe.” He tells her.

“Like you did with Otis?” Lori responds. Shane is a mess of nerves and anger but Lori… she stands calm and tired in the eye of the storm, “What happened that night? You haven't been the same since.” She prods. 

The man steps back and gives a tense smile to the floor, his hands finding his hips. “You wanna know what happened with Otis? What happened with Otis happened because I love you .” Lori watches him carefully. “I love you. I love Carl. and I love Bella. That's right.”

He waits.

He waits for Lori to respond, “I told Rick.” She says simply.

Shane’s eyes jump from his skull, “What? You told... you told him what?” He questions- there were many things she could tell him… but he knew what she said. “Did you tell him that you thought you were a widow? That you were grieving, and that the world was coming to an end? That- that you needed comforting?” He questions, Lori can’t help but think a little crazily. “Did you tell him it was a mistake? You know, Lori, that ain't true.” She watches the man carefully. “What we had; it was real. ”

Lori's head shakes before she can tell it to, “It was not.” Her words are firm.

“It was a long time coming. It was real, Lori.” He says in turn, calmer than he has ever been. The quick switch of the man pulls Lori back, her gaze jumping up and down. He was calm, extremely calm, and he wasn’t going to listen to anything Lori says; unless she tells him the lies, he wants to hear.

But Lori won’t give in, “It was not.

Shane nods like a child that doesn’t get his way, “It was you and it was me, Bella and Carl, and it was real. It was right .” He spits calmly, “Don't say it wasn't.”

“ It wasn't .”

Shane shakes his head and grabs Lori’s shoulder, his grip digging into the flesh. “Just think about what you felt, just for a second. What you fe…” He says calmly, face drawn close to Lori's and his voice quiet. “What you felt. Everything falling apart all around us, but it... it was the one good thing.” He says quietly, the noise filling Lori’s ears and forcing her into an isolated bubble; one she desperately wanted to escape. “And you know it's true.” Shane whispers close to her ear. His breath hot on her skin making her quiver in disgust.

The man she went towards for safety and comfort, only a week and a half ago, now made her want to vomit. The acid builds in the back of her throat and she wants to run.

“Daddy! There’s a car!” Bella’s voice shouts through the closed door and Lori takes the chance to push herself away.

The duo stare for a moment before moving through the door and out of the house.

Bella finds herself at Shane’s side and Carl finds himself at Lori’s; together the group watches the car approach. The silver Sudan Rick and Glenn took pulls to a stop in front of the farmhouse, the light of yet another new day cresting over the trees.

Rick and Glenn pull out of the car, Hershel coming from the back. Maggie cries in relief and darts forward, past Hershel, and towards Glenn’s. Words are shared but Bella watches intently at the car.

“Mr. Grimes?” She calls out, interrupting the conversation. “Who’s that?” She points at the car where a younger looking man sits, a blindfold tied across his eyes.

Everyone turns towards the sheriff with questioning eyes and a few take steps back. Shane pushes Bella behind his back.

Randall.

The trio of Rick, Glenn, and Hershel came across a group of guys scavenging in the town. Two of them tried killing the trio when Rick wouldn’t give up the farm, and the others tried avenging their fallen ‘brothers’. 

And Randall. He was left for dead when he had fallen on a fence pike.

It’s only the kindness of Rick, that the boy was still alive- that is, if he survives the surgery to fix his ripped leg. 

Hershel works hard to fix the young man. And Rick changes in his tent.

Lori pulls the shirt off Rick’s back, his shoulder tight with pain. She touches a bruise gently and dabs it with a cold cloth, Rick sighing in relief where he sits on his cot.

The silence in the tent is loud and Rick gives a peak over his shoulder, motioning Lori to just talk; he knew she wanted too. “We need to talk about Shane.” She speaks.

“What's he done now?”

Lori rubs gently at the opposite shoulder, visibly uninjured. “He thinks the baby's his.” She says quietly, and she can feel Rick tense under her light touch. “No matter what, it's yours.” The words seem more for herself than him.

“He'll accept that.” Rick agrees and relaxes into Lori’s touch.

But she stops her touch, “You're gonna have to make him. He won't listen to me. He's delusional and he's dangerous. ” Rick looks over his shoulder gently, barely turning his head. “When I went looking for you, he came after me…”

“Well, of course he did.”

Lori continues, “...And lied to me to get me back here, said you were already back.” Her touch leaves a wave of cold over her husband’s skin, “You saw what he did at the barn. He's threatened Dale and Hershel. He's scaring people and he's scaring me…” She admits and plays with her fingers. “And I think he killed Otis.” Rick looks over carefully, “I think he left him behind and I think… I think he did it not just to save Carl but because he loves me…” 

Rick turns his torso to face Lori sideways, “But you don't know that.”

“And he thinks that we're supposed to be together no matter what. Me, him, Carl, and Bella.”

Rick nods and turns back, facing the wall of the tent, “Those gunmen left that kid behind today. I killed two people myself because of you, and Carl and the baby.” He admits to her, looking down at his own hands as though he could see the blood that stained them, “It was gonna be me and not them no matter what.” 

“You killed the living to protect what's yours?” Lori asks and Rick nods. Curling over Rick’s shoulders, Lori rests her head atop Rick's left shoulder, her hand cradling his heart and the wound that had put him into his coma. “Shane thinks I'm his.” She whispers into his ear, “He thinks the baby's his.” Rick listens intently, “And he says you can't protect us, that you're gonna get us killed.” Lori’s hand quivers slightly over his skin, his hand finds her quickly without thought. “He's dangerous, Rick, and he won't stop.”

Chapter Text

“What if he comes back?” Carol questions into the gathered group.

Everyone stands tense, the discussion was not an easy one. 

The boy, Randall, had survived and been declared fine. He would have a hard time walking but he could still walk, Hershel didn’t take his lower leg- a concern he had going into surgery. 

But now what to do with him.

It was a 50/50 between the group; to keep the boy, or to get rid of him.

“We’ll take him 18 miles out,” Shane explains. “He won’t be able to find his way back.” 

18 miles out.

That’s how far Rick and Shane would take the boy before letting him loose with a few supplies to survive.

Andrea leans heavily against a wall, “What if he finds his group?” Everyone whips their heads towards Rick and Shane in wonder.

“They left him for dead.” Rick states plainly. “They aren’t looking for him.”

Hesitantly, everyone nods their approval and Randall is dragged from the shed and thrown into the back of the car. 

It’s not unnoticed or unknown how much Shane despises this plan. He thinks Rick should’ve left the boy to die to begin with; they know nothing of him or his group, who knows what kind of person he is. 

But Rick won’t hear it and they begin the car ride. 

Hands tied, blindfold atop his eyes and music blaring in his ears Randall lays in anxious energy in the trunk of the car- he can barely feel the car stop.

Outside of the trunk, the car is almost silent; so silent Shane could swear he hears the music playing from the trunk. And the tension from the farm has followed to the inside of the car, or more like, the two men that sit inside the car.

The air fizzles with the desire to talk but no words come.

Shane and Rick have been in this very situation, sort of, a hundred times before. Rick driving, Shane sitting passenger, and sometimes a criminal in the back of the car. Those times were filled with laughter, sometimes seriousness, but it never felt like this.

Like the air is suffocating them. Like the tension between the brothers would blow the window out of the car with how heavy its growing in the air.

Like the farther they drive… the more they break the shell they’ve both kept on at the farm.

After twenty minutes of silence the duo has finally reached the halfway point of their journey, the long and blocked roads of farm roads forced them to take multiple detours and change their route as they go. 

The road ahead is clear and open, the joining of four fields meeting at a crossroads. Rick pulls the car to a stop before the start of the crossroads in the open fields of Atlanta. The sheriff climbs out to stand in the middle of the crossroads. Shane drags himself out and stretches. “I thought we were going further.” He questions.

“We are.” Rick confirms, “18 miles out.”

Shane looks around, Rick’s back turned to him.  “So why are we stopping?” He asks while keeping his distance.

Rick turns slowly towards Shane, his voice tired as he speaks. “I wanted to talk. Been waiting a week till we were gonna do this.” Shane rolls his eyes, “I just wanna talk.”

“We don't need to.”

“We do.”

“No man, we don't.” Shane insists. He looks around the open fields and places his hands on his hips. “We're doing this. I get it.” Rick drops his head for a moment. “He was passed out when y'all brought him back, doesn't know where the farm is.” Rick purses his lips and bows his he.

“That isn't what I need to talk to you about.” He informs Shane. And the man pulls back for a moment. “I heard what really happened at the school.” Shane watches Rick blankly, “Was it to survive?” The tone of Rick’s words were serious, his cop voice flooding to the surface.

And Shane wasn’t going to lie. He didn’t care enough to lie. “Yeah. One of us wasn't gonna make it out. It had to be him.” Shane’s voice doesn’t carry an ounce of remorse. He had killed Otis at the high school all to save Carl and get back to the farm. He’d do it all over again if he had too. “One shot to the leg, Carl lives. Reality is… he had no business being here… there. Whatever.” Shane had dreams Otis lived- that he was the one to get shot… he’d wake up in hot sweats from those dreams. His heart pounding painfully in his chest.

“You don't think I would've done it?” Rick questions the man seriously.

Shane shakes his head. Rick was always a good man. But in this new world, life is all about survival. He knows Rick would never be able to do what was necessary. “No, man, I know you wouldn't have.”

Rick steps forward drawing Shane’s eyes to him, “You don't think I can keep Lori or Carl safe?

“I didn't say that.”

“Or my baby?” He pushes, “Is it gonna have to be me too?” Rick doesn’t want to hear Shane’s answer… and he doesn’t really need to. He can see it in Shane’s eyes; ‘if it came to it’. 

“Rick, you can't just be the good guy and expect to live. Okay? Not anymore.” Shane calls out exasperated. 

He approaches Shane, stopping short in front of Shane, “I'm not the good guy anymore. To save Carl's life, I would've done anything- anything .” His voice is firm, leaving no room for discussion. Pulling back slightly, Rick looks intensely at Shane. “Now Lori says you're dangerous, but you're not gonna be dangerous. Not to us. Not to me. Not anymore.” And Shane won’t look at him. His eyes downcast away from Rick’s piercing eyes. Eyes that burn so deeply on his skin. “How about you look at me?” Rick growls and Shane’s eyes pick up slightly. “You and Lori- I get what happened. When I figured it out-” He huffs a pained laugh, “and I figured it out pretty quickly… “I wanted to break your jaw, let you choke on your teeth. But I didn't.” He spits at the man who has finally raised his head. “That wasn't weakness. It took everything .” Rick hisses at Shane. “That is my wife. That is my son. That is my unborn child. I will stay alive to keep them alive.” Shane watches Rick burn with passion. “You don't love her. You think you do, but you don't.” Shane can’t help his lip curl. “Now the only way you and me keep on… is that you accept everything I just said right here, right now, and we move forward with that understanding.” Rick watches Shane’s face, for anything other than the blank, almost annoyed, expression he had been wearing.

But his face changes, dropping from blankness to a painful memory. “When it started it was just- it was a couple of weird stories on the news. Then-” He sighs and looks at Rick, “Then it was so quick. Everything-” A pause. “It just happened. Two weeks later, I'm in the hospital and there were soldiers shooting people in the halls. They were shooting people, man, not walkers. Then the walkers came through.” Rick watches Shane carefully, the tensions lessening slightly. “You know, I tried to get you out, I tried , but we weren't gonna make it. Man, there was no way, and I knew it. But I couldn't live with it.” Shane picks at his fingertips and pant loops where his hands rest on his hips. “I couldn't live, knowing- But I had to.” A slight step forward. “I didn't keep Lori and Carl alive, man. Bella and them- they kept me alive.” His voice bleeds with emotion as he speaks. “I want you to know that I didn't look at her before that.” Rick watches Shane with sharp eyes, “Brother, if I could take it all back, I would.” 

Shane’s words settle in the air. Neither man spoke for a moment. The only noise is the quiet distant chirping of birds and the whisper of the wind. 

“I wanna check the ropes.” Rick responds simply.

Shane nods without response and together they move to the back of the trunk. A quick check of the ropes that bind the young man in the trunk sends them back on their way.

The conversion did nothing to reduce the tension in the car, so Shane just looked out the window and into the open fields. 

He sees a walker. 

A single lonely walker moving through the tall grass, its clothing dark against the brown and burnt grass.

The sight turns his gut and the little food inside. Shane’s mind begins to race with thought as they pass the field swiftly. 

The father didn’t want to leave the farm. What if Randall’s group found the farm? What if something happened and his daughter, Carl, and Lori were left alone?

But that didn’t matter as Rick pulls up to an abandoned looking building with a large fence and military vehicles near it. 

In silence, Rick and Shane drift through the fenced area. The place is scattered with vehicles; buses, cars, and trucks, with trash fluttering across the ground with the breeze. The area is open except for a few walkers. 

Rick draws his knife and approaches the first walker that growls from behind a chain link fence- the thing to stupid to realize five feet to its right is an opening. Shane had drawn his gun but Rick pushed it away. 

Gripping the fence, Rick lines up his knife and drives it deeply into the walker's forehead- the former army soldier dropping to the ground once Rick pulls the metal blade free. The body collapses with a thick thump to the cement ground. 

Rick and Shane share a look as another growl comes from behind a truck. A single walker stumbles from behind and approaches the fence in the same manner as the first. Shane draws his blade and copies Rick’s actions. They needed to start saving ammo.

With the area cleared, they bring the car inside before approaching the trunk.

Randall sits in a bundle of anxiety as the trunk opens, light barely breaking through the cloth on his eyes. Hands grip at the headphones ripping them off without care before moving to his arms dragging him out of the trunk and onto the hard ground.

“Please. Please, let’s talk about this!” Randall begins spilling words as he is dragged across the ground, the cement scraping at his pants and fresh wound. He tries to draw his legs underneath him but his leg flares in pain at the movement and the two men don’t give him a chance to get his feet under him.

Quickly, Randall is forced to his knees and he drops to sit on his good left leg. A hand grabs at the fabric around his eyes and drags it off, pulling some hair from the root alongside it. The man’s eyes burn as he looks up to the Rick and Shane that stand above him. “The hell is this?” Randall’s voice cries and Shane rolls his eyes. “Oh, come on, don't be stupid. I owe you guys. I can help protect what you've got.” The duo above him just look down as they messily fold up the blindfold. “Why would you save my life just to kill me by leaving me here? One guy- one guy can't make it alone. That's why I was with those dudes- I was alone.” His voice begins to raise high as Rick drops down a bag with some food and a plastic bottle of water. The boy should be able to find plenty of supplies in this deserted camp. “Don't be stupid! I'm not like them! I'm just some guy! I used to watch football and screw around on the Internet. I lived with my mom! I lost her like you lost people.” He screams as the duo walks away. With their backs turned he screams, “I went to school with Maggie for God's sake! I went to church. I rode the bench on varsity baseball.” The men stop cold but Randall doesn't notice, he just continues to ramble.

“You went to school with Maggie?” Rick questions walking back to the man still on his knees.

Randall slows his words to look at the men that approach him menacingly. “You go to school with Maggie?” Shane questions harshly. Randall doesn’t answer, his mouth just opens like a gaping fish searching for water. “Answer the question! Did you go to school with Maggie?!” Shane shouts into the boy’s face, his fist gripped tightly in his dirt and soaked shirt.

Randall nods his head and flinches from the presence of Shane, “I-- it– she didn't know me. Didn't even know I existed.” He explains quickly, “I mean, I knew her. I knew who her dad was.” He explains with terror as Shane releases him. Rick and Shane rub at their faces. “There is no way I would ever do anything to hurt her or her family.” The duo turn on Randall. “Or you– or your people! I'm not like the guys I was with!” He begs.

Rick and Shane stand in thought as he continues babbling to them. Their chests burn with concern. He knows where the farm is. He knows them. 

“He knows where the farm is, Rick. Where we are-” Shane comes close to Rick, “he knows.” Shane stresses. Rick’s back is turned to the boy as Shane stands in front. “Say he finds his way back to his people…” 

Rick watches Shane’s eyes darken and his hand twitch. “Shane, no!” Rick shouts, drawing Shane’s eyes away from the terrified man on the ground. “Not now-- just not now!” 

Shane had only one thought; Randall needs to die. 

But Rick won’t listen.

Randall knows where they are. He knows that there are men, women, and children in the camp. He knows there’s a doctor and supplies. 

It’s too big of a risk to let him go.

To let this man go find a group filled with bad people. To find his people.

“Well, when, Rick? When?” Shane growls angrily as he slightly paces in front of Rick, the sheriff’s body acting as a wall behind Shane and Randall.

“When I've had a chance to think about it.”

“Don't let him kill me. Please don't.” Randall begs.

Rick takes a very serious tone. “We're going back. It's a man's life . I need a night to think it through.” And Rick watches Shane face contort into anger. The man was quick to anger at times, now more than ever.

He points an accusing finger at Randall over Rick’s shoulder, “You're gonna bring this piece of garbage- this piece of garbage who-” He growls and turns on Rick. “He shot at you, Rick. He ran with men who tried to kill you.” Rick nods in agreement but Shane is livid, his voice dripping in anger. “You gonna bring him back to where Lori sleeps? To where Carl sleeps? Where my daughter sleeps?!” He shouts in Rick’s face that is turning to stone.

“He'll be locked up in the barn,” he tells Shane, “unless you bust it open.” He tacks on.

“Oh, don't start that shit.” Shane huffs with the blabber of Randall flowing into the conversation.

Rick states simply to the approaching storm, “I'm taking the night.”

Shane mockingly laughs and huffs, “Man, you take that and you think on it, Rick. Keep struggling with it.” He turns and looks pointedly at Rick, Shane’s voice going more collected than it has been. “It ain't hard, man. The right choice is the one that keeps us alive. It's always the same with you. It's like whenever you're put to the test.” Shane’s eyes jump up and down Rick’s body in judgment.

Rick rolls his eyes, “Stop acting like you know the way ahead, like you know the rules.” His voice drawls, “There are no rules, man. We're lost.” He admits to the open air.

And Shane’s face has a small smile creeping up his mouth, “No-no-no, man. I know exactly where I am.” He says honestly, Randall finally quiet in the background. “You don't know shit anymore. I don't think you can do it, Rick.” The man sneers at the sheriff as the air goes quiet.

Rick shrugs his shoulders and turns to gather Randall from the ground, “It's my call, man.”

“I don't think you can keep them safe.” Rick stops cold at Shane’s words and he turns to the man. Randall can’t help but try and shimmy away from the duo, the tension burning the air. 

Rick's voice is deathly still, “What did you just say?”

Shane looks calmly at Rick, “You can’t keep them safe.” Rick’s shoulders pull up like a spring ready to snap. “You wanna bring this piece of shit back to the farm. You wanna give him a chance. He tried to kill you!” Shane growls at him.  

“It’s a man’s life.” He spits in return. 

Shane steps forward harshly,  “A man that will slit your throat in your sleep for the fun of it.” He growls with hand motion drawing across his neck.

Rick looks to Shane exasperated- a man he knew since childhood turning into something he didn’t recognize. “He shot at us to survive.”

“Don’t give me that shit.”

“We’re going back.”

Shane shakes his head as they stand still. Randall slowly, very slowly, gains some distance from his captors but the act is difficult. “You’re weak, Rick.” Rick looks at Shane, his eyes glittering with slight betrayal. “A trash son of a bitch like this- you wanna… you wanna spare his life?!” He shouts, "No… he’s dying here and now.” Rick moves in front of Randall with his head shaking. “He’s a threat! To my daughter, to Carl, to the whole group. And if you can’t do it-” Shane grabs his gun from his hostler and begins to raise it.  “I will.”

Rick grabs Shane wrist pushing to the ground. A single shot rings out and Randall jumps back in surprise as it lands a few feet away from him. Shane raises his fist swiftly and knocks Rick back with a strike to his cheek.

Stumbled backwards, Rick looks at Shane in disbelief. It lasts only a moment before Rick rushes Shane and grabs at the gun with two hands. The pair twist and grapple at each other, grips tight on the gun.

With a shout Shane charges forward against Rick slamming them into a car. Shane tries to pull free but Rick recovers swiftly and drives a hard kick to Shane’s shin.

Bending in pain, Rick grabs the gun and tosses it away, the gun stopping underneath a firetruck. “Enough, Shane!” He pushes the man away and into another car, “We’re leaving.”

Shane shakes his head as he raises and Rick raises another fist at the face Shane makes. The swing is caught underneath Shane’s left arm and twisted. Hands gripping Rick’s shoulders, Shane rings his head back before driving it forward into Rick’s.

The strike dazes Rick, and he tumbles away, hands trying to find purchase against the car. Shane’s hands dance on Rick’s hips as he pulls at the holster and the gun resting inside. As the revolver is pulled Rick winds his elbow backwards and into Shane’s face.

The gun clatters to the ground and Rick forces two swift strikes to Shane’s face, the third is stopped as Shane flips Rick onto the truck of the car- growls and grunts escaping both men.

Rick and Shane are too busy fighting each other to notice twenty feet away, Randal drags his body across the ground towards a random knife that lays on the ground. The rope that binds his hands behind his back and his feet together dig deeply into his flesh.

Looking up, Randall watches as Shane kicks Rick away and to the ground. The sheriff grips hard at his stomach and tries to crawl away but the weight of a motorcycle falls onto his legs- Shane standing above.

“Damn!” Rick growls in pain and tries to draw his legs out from underneath the weight of the cop motorcycle. Blood drips from his nose and his split lip, a bruise already forming on his eye.

Shane walks away from the man and towards the firetruck his gun rests under. Bent down he reaches underneath and grabs his weapon. Checking his ammo, he drifts around an armored truck to see Randall crawl with his shoulder. 

Shane raises the gun up towards Randall, “No!” Rick barrels into Shane, hand grabbing for the gun once more. Rick and Shane fall to the ground as they wrestle for the weapon. Knocking the gun from Shane’s hand, Rick rolls on top of Shane, two swift punches struck to the man’s face. Rick’s fists form a white-knuckle grip on Shane's brown shirt and he pulls up before slamming him down to the ground, knocking the wind from Shane’s chest. Shane’s head bounces as Rick punches his head three more times, the skin on his forehead splitting slightly.

His chest jumps up and down with exertion, “You’re not doing this!” Rick shouts as he paces. Shane wipes harshly at his pain flaring face, he painfully turns to his knees and slowly begins to stand. “You don’t get to make these decisions anymore!” Shane finds his footing. “I won’t let you.” Rick promises.

Shane gives him a sideye before roaring in anger and whipping an large two foot iron wrench at Rick’s head. 

The sheriff dodges the attack and falls into a pile of trash bags pile next to the wall of the building. The wrench shatter and crunches a window it flies through. 

With a huff and a pause, Rick and Shane still for a moment as a hand curls around the seal of the window. A hand that belongs to a walker that crawls out of the building quickly.

The walker falls to the ground and spots Rick but he reacts quickly with his heart pounding. Knife drawn, he stabs the walker as more groans fill the air and more undead hands grab to pull themselves from the building. 

Falling to the ground, Rick pulls the walker corpse on top of himself as Shane darts away from the flood of walkers. Randall watches with wide terrified eyes as he reaches the knife and swiftly cuts his bonds. 

Almost a dozen walkers find their way out of the building. And a woman walker targets the injured man on the ground. The walker growls harshly and approaches Randall quickly, he kicks her leg out to stop her approach. 

But she collapses on top of him and begins to snarl in his face.

Her face goes limp as the tip of a blade comes out of her forehead. Pulling the body off the man, Rick grabs Randall and forces him up as they watch Shane run with a herd of walkers on his heels.

“Come on, man. Let’s go!” Randall begs and bites his lip at Rick’s face, “He just tried to kill you!” 

Rick gives him a look that tells to say silent. Forcing Randall around, Rick grabs his wrists and slices the bounds, “If you try anything, I will kill you.” Rick growls and Randall nods in understanding, “Let’s go.” The pair leave the fenced area as Shane rushes for safety.

Darting towards a small bus, Shane opens the folding doors and slips inside. The walkers slam into the door and Shane fights to keep them closed as the dozen walkers fight against them. Dead hands block the door from closing fully and Shane tries to stab them away, but they don’t run from the stabs and slashings; they just continue their pursuit of food.

Shane fights hard but the walkers manage to open the door a sliver and fear courses through his chest, he can’t run to the back and open the door fast enough to escape. Looking out the window, Shane watches as Randall and Rick dart away from him and he grows more fearful.

Turning back to the left, Shane raises his blade and drives it into the skull of a walker that tries to force its face into the bus. But it does nothing to stop the herd.

Shane’s mind races and thirty second of fight feel like an hour. 

“Hey, assholes!” A voice shouts and the sound of a horn blares. Walkers and Shane look over towards the car where Rick rests out of the passenger window with his gun in his hand, a few shots ring out and a walker drops.

And the herd turns on the car with blaring music, horns, and shouting voices. Randall, in the driver's seat, moves the car slowly drawing the walkers away from the bus. 

“Go to the back!” Rick calls.

Shane wastes no time heaving once more against the door, fully losing it, before darting toi the ass of the bus. He pulls the emergency lever and lets the door swing open as the blue car shrieks to a stop. 

His hand grip at the window of the car and Shane slides feet first into the car through the car window. “Go!” He calls as he pulls himself into the safety of the vehicle. And Randall wastes no time stepping on the gas and leaving marks on the cement.

The trio, all somewhat intact, speed away from the camp and onto a backwater road with trees surrounding the length. A grin is plastered on his face but it wipes away as Rick puts his gun to Rnadall’s head, “Pull over.”

The addreline flatters, “Aw, come on… I thought we were a pretty good team.” Rick just pushes the barrel to his forehead, “Okay.” Randall pulls the car to a stop and shut the engine off.

Even though he helped save Shane, Randall is pulled from the driver seat, rebounded and thrown back into the trunk with headphones and a blindfold on.

Rick and Shane stand in the silence of the air and rest against the closed trunk of the car. Blood spots both their faces, long dried, but their clothes remain stuck to their sweaty bodies and bruises begin to form.

“If you want to kill me,” Rick’s voice is gruff and tired, “you’re gonna have to do better than a wrench.” Shane looks to Rick, his piercing blue eyes dancing against the dry blood. “Probably gonna have to kill that boy.” His voice is defeated- he didn’t want to kill anyone. “But I’m gonna take the night.” Shane nods simply. “It can’t be that easy killing someone.” He states, not as an opinion but as a fact. “Killing anyone. You know that.” If killing people became easy… Rick doesn’t want to think what kind of monster that would make someone. Shane doesn’t say anything, just waits for Rick to talk. Rick’s lip curls for a second, “That is my wife. That is my son. That is my child.” Shane looks at Rick with a slight pain in his eyes. “If you’re gonna be with us, you gotta follow my lead,” Rick’s voice is even and calm as he stares sideways at Shane. “You gotta trust me.” Shane doesn't move, waiting- just waiting. Rick bumps himself off the trunk gently and turns around to face the trunk. “It’s time for you to come back.” He says and hands out the gun in his hand. The gun Shane used to try and kill Randall.

Shane’s hand grabs at the gun slowly pulling it to himself. And they stare at each other, they can’t say for how long before something in their eyes tells them it’s time to get back to the farm.

The drive back is just as quiet as the drive there. And Shane looks out into the fields of Atlanta… watching that same lonely walker continue its journey through the grass as a smaller walker finds a place trailing alongside him.  

“Do you know what’s going on with our dads?” Carl questions back at the farm. Bella and Carl had walked away from the camp towards the forest that fences them in. Bella has a bucket in her hands, her baby blue dress brushing against the wild flowers that were beginning to take over the fields and her gun snatching her already too small waist. 

Carl follows behind her, hand picking at leaves to rip them apart. Bella pulls harshly at a pretty purple flower and stuffs it into her pile. “Not really.” She comments, moving for another flower.

“I know you’re lying,” He says to her turned back. He walks next to her and drops the torn up leaf in his hand, “What is it?”

Bella looks at her friend and sighs, “You already know why.” She turns her back again and continues walking the field.

Carl finds his place back at her side as she walks away from the current patch of flowers, following the perimeter of the farm. “Because of the barn?” He questions.

“Yeah,” She says simply, “At least I think so.” Carl gives her an unimpressed look and she sighs, “Our daddies don’t agree on some of the stuff going on in the group.” She explains as she turns them onto a dirt path that will take them back to the house. “Daddy said he was gonna try and be better- ‘nicer’-” she adds air quotations, “so hopefully… things will get better soon.”

Carl nods with no real emotion. Approaching the farmhouse, Bella and Carl come to the porch to see Lori with her head in her hands. 

Beth tried to kill herself.

Bella and Carl don’t know how to react but they can feel their chest turn painfully in sadness. Beth was depressed, so depressed, from the barn that she tried to take her life. And everyone was hurting from it.

Lori sniffles and stands to head back inside, to send Carl and Bella away, but she grabs at the offered flower pale first. The flowers inside are bright and colorful.

Hopefully they’ll help cheer Beth and the Greenes up. 

And if not… ‘oh well’ is all Bella can think.

Chapter Text

Another day, the same nightmare.

Beth was healing slowly- the shock of almost killing herself shaking her back into reality. 

Andrea had been ‘banished’ by Maggie- the blonde woman had left Beth alone with the words that ‘it’s your choice’ before the young girl locked herself in the bathroom and slit her wrists.

Hershel had stitched his daughter up; the cuts were deep but not deep enough that he couldn’t help healing her. 

And the tension between Rick and Shane has noticeably shifted.

So now the group is gathered eating some breakfast when the group’s redneck comes up from the shed their prisoner rests in. 

Rick stands at attention. “Boy there's got a gang, thirty men.” Daryl starts adjusting his crossbow over his shoulder. “They have heavy artillery and they ain't looking to make friends. They roll through here; our boys are dead. And our women, they're gonna-” He notices Bella by Shane’s leg and changes his words, “They're gonna wish they were.” His words are gruff.

Rick nods his head in understanding and a silent thank you. The redneck had gotten Randall to talk.

And what he did is quite noticeable with a simple look at the man. Daryl’s knuckles on both hands are split and bright red with impact. “What did you do?” Carol questions worryingly.

“Had a little chat.”

Rick turns to the group with his hands atop his waist. “No one goes near this guy.” The words are a command that no one will argue against. 

Lori steps forward, “Rick, what are you gonna do?” She questions with her arms crossed over her chest.

The sheriff licks his lips tensely, “We have no choice. He's a threat.” The group waits. “We have to eliminate the threat.” His voice is hard and cold. The group knew Rick’s morals- he wasn’t a killer, and it worried them even more. 

Dale looks around at the silent group, “You're just gonna kill him?” The old man is bewildered looking at Rick.

He nods simply, his hand drifting to his gun. “It's settled. I'll do it today.” 

Rick turns to leave, his feet already carrying him away when Dale’s voice sounds out following behind him, “You can't do this.” Rick doesn’t stop walking away from the small camp, so Dale moves swiftly alongside him. “You don't wanna do this. I know you don't.” The old man's voice proclaims.

Rick sighs, “I thought about it all night. Knowing what we know now,” He pauses for a moment of thought, “I don't see a way out of it.” He admits to Dale still moving swiftly.

The man shakes his head, “But you can't just decide on your own to take someone's life.” 

Rick shrugs, “The group seemed supportive.”

“What, because they didn't speak back?” Dale questions in shock, “You didn't let 'em.” He stops Rick with an arm in front of his chest. The sheriff turns his head to the old man, “There's gotta be a- a process.”

“And what would that be? We can't call witnesses, go before a judge-”

Dale’s eyes are wild, “So he's automatically guilty by association and sentenced to death?” His voice is laced in concern and disbelief. “He's just a kid.” Dale says gently, the words forcing Rick to truly stop and look at Dale. “Gimme some time to talk to everyone…” Dale begins to beg.

But Rick’s head starts to shake. “No, we can't drag this out! People are scared.”

“Which is why they need time to discuss this.”

Rick raises his hand, “No, no, no, they need to be safe. I owe 'em that.” He states. The group looks to him to protect them- to lead them. He needs to protect them- he has to protect his family. He turns to walk away when Dale doesn't speak.

Dale watches Rick begins to leave, “You think about your son!” He shouts at his back forcing Rick to stop cold. “The message that you're giving him…” The sheriff stands still even as Dale rounds on him, “Shoot first, think later.” Dale puts his hands together as though he was praying, “I'm asking for one day to talk to everybody. You can give me that. Think-think about Carl.” Dale’s voice drips with plea.

“I am.” Rick says to Dale simply. And Dale’s face drops at the words, and it hurts Rick. He wants to protect his family, but he can never seem to do it right. “We reconvene at sunset, then what happens, happens.” Dale breathes in relief as Rick walks away.

Even with Randall tied and locked away, the camp still balances on the tip of a knife, waiting for something bad to happen, balancing in suspense. Bella and Carl walk around the camp, Shane telling them to go somewhere else away from the shed. 

And walking away towards camp, Bella almost misses Carl slipping away from her. Her feet follow him without thought towards the shed and she gives Carl a look. Slipping into the rafters of the roof, Bella whispers how bad of an idea it is with Shane right outside, but Carl is silent as he sits and looks down at the prisoner.

Sitting together they stare down at the man that tries to look out the shed through a crack in the wood. His face is bruised and swollen with only slight spottings of blood, his sweaty hair sticking to the inflamed flesh.

Walking back gently to stop the tight pull on his wrists Randall looks to the roof. Bella almost laughs at the slight jump he can’t suppress.

The prisoner licks his lips in surprise and takes a swift look to the door. “Hey. That's a sweet hat.” He says softly looking up to the innocent and clean vision of Bella and Carl sitting side-by-side. “I'm Randall. What's your names?” The duo just stares down at Randall. “The sheriff guy- That's your dad? I like him.” He smiles and licks his lips. “Yeah, he's a good guy. I can tell. Your mom out here too? You're-- you're lucky you still got your family. I lost mine.” The kids remain silent, but Carl stands to drift down the ladder. “You two siblings? I don’t have any siblings. No- no, you're that man’s daughter, aren’t you? Bella, right? It’s Bella and- and Carl.” On the dirt floor of the shed, Bella looks sharply over Carl’s shoulder. Randall swallows thickly at the sight. “Hey, I-- I don't know what people been saying about me, but I didn't do nothing. I swear. Your dad was gonna let me go till his friend started fighting with him. It got pretty bad. I-- I was kinda worried.” He takes a small step forward as the two continue just starring. “My camp, we got lots of supplies. You help me, I'll take you and your folks back to my people. We'll take good care of you. Keep you safe. Just gotta–” He shakes his shackles slightly and steps forward. “Just gotta help me get out of here, okay? Just help me pick these locks or find the key, okay?” His voice jumps higher, and he shakes his wrists harshly. Randall’s eyes are crazed looking down at the kids and they don’t stay that way.

Not as the red wooden door of the shed slams open and two adult bodies find their way inside. “What the hell are you doing in here?” Shane calls gripping tightly at Bella and Carl’s shoulder. His dark gaze turns on Randall, “What did you say to them? What did you say to them, huh?” He growls, grabbing tightly at the man’s throat.

“I didn't say nothing.” He cries.

Shane smiles darkly and pulls his weapon from his holster, “Let me tell you something– I will shoot you where you sit.” The cold metal of the barrel digs deep into Randall’s skin. From behind them Andrea’s voice calls for Shane to back away, her body in front of the kids. Shane’s lip curls up and he drops the gun to the man’s mouth, “Open your mouth. Open your mouth. You like talking, man? You like talking?!” He screams trying to force the metal past Randall’s teeth.

Randall squeezes his eyes tightly. “Enough, daddy!” Bella calls out. 

And Shane pulls back, pushing Randall harshly to the floor- his wrists tearing from the metal and his scab tearing on his leg, more than Daryl tore when they were ‘talking’.

Shane holsters his gun and turns to the kids- his hands gripping their upper arms hard to drag them out of the shed. “Get your asses out this door. Let's go.” Bella and Carl stumble slightly to a stop and stand short in front of Shane. “The hell you doing?” He spits at both of them.

“Please don't tell my parents.” Carl cries as he rights himself.

Shane looks to the shed to watch Andrea lock it. “That ain't cool, man. You both could've gotten hurt in there.” He tells them, eyes wide. 

“I can handle myself.” Carl responds and Bella looks between the two males.

Shane’s eyes squeeze tight, and he wants to shout but he holds it in. “Let me tell you something, you do not go near him again. Do you hear me?” He commands the kids- Bella gives an understanding nod and Carl gives a halfhearted one. Satisfied that they wouldn’t go in again Shane licks his lips and rubs his face. “Now go find your mom.” He demands of Carl; the boy turns without a word. “Bella, stay here.” He calls out as she turns to follow.

Bella and Shane watch Carl get back to the camp. The father grabs at Bella’s arm and drags her a bit away from Andrea and the shed. “Are you insane?” Shane questions Bella, bent down to his hunches. “Anything could’ve happened in there.” 

The father stares at his daughter as she looks over his tense face filled with bruises. Shane’s eye sports a bruise and inflamed skin that spreads down to his cheek bone- the swelling isn’t dramatic but noticeable alongside the small flesh tear cuts on his bottom lip and the top left of his forehead. Rick wasn’t much better with his injuries. Both men have had their fair share of injuries but never like this; never this many. 

Bella doesn’t respond and it makes Shane pull back. With a sigh Shane stands, rubbing at his face once more in stress, “Go back to camp.” Bella nods blankly and turns to leave, “And don’t go doing anything stupid again, Bella.” He commands.

“Yes, daddy.” She responds over her shoulder as she leaves him by the shed.

She walks forward towards camp as Carl walks quickly towards the open field, leaving his dad behind talking to Lori.

A quick look over her shoulder and Bella takes off down the other path following Carl. No one notices them heading towards the small hill with a tree, the place Daryl had set his own camp. 

Climbing the mound, Carl looks over the small camp; a sun-bleached orange tent drawn up, a small dead fire pit in the middle with some metal pots scattered at the side, a clothesline, and the coolest part… Daryl’s motorcycle.

Well technically, Merle’s motorcycle, but he was more than likely dead since they never found him in the city, so its ownership has been passed down. 

Carl grins slightly and holds at the handles of the motorcycle, pretending to rev the dead engine. His eyes dance over the large hunk of dark metal, the bike was longer than the boy and probably seven times his weight, but he couldn’t help but want to sit on it.

Thinking better of it, he decides to just touch… though that is dangerous too if Daryl ever caught him. Drifting to the back, Carl spots a satchel hooked over the seat. Slipping his hand inside, he pulls out a handgun and turns it in his hands. 

“Stealing is wrong, you know?” Carl jumps in his skin and whips around quickly with wide eyes.

With a thick swallow, he tries to put on a blank face as though he wasn’t scared shitless a second ago. “Bee? Where did you come from?” 

Bella circles around the fire pit, “I followed you. You just didn’t notice?” She wasn’t trying to sneak up on him- though the face he made was worth it.

Carl sneers when he sees the smirk that grows on Bella’s face. “What do you want?” He questions as he slips the gun into his pants and turns away.

Bella goes wide eyed at his tone and watches as he begins to walk away. Sputtering for a moment, Bella takes after him, “What’s with the attitude? I just want to hang out with my friend.” She calls as she jogs to Carl’s side. He only offers her a sideways look before continuing on in silence. “You really think this is a good idea?” Bella asks even though Carl remains silent. “Last time I was in the woods…” She starts to say softly.

“Shut up.” Carl spits harshly as he walks, and Bella can barely muffle the choke that tries to escape. Stopping in his tracks Carl looks back to Bella, her eyes hurt, and her body drawn back. “Sorry. I’m sorry.” He says with a heavy sigh.

Meeting the boy with a few steps, Bella motions for them to continue. “Do you wanna talk?” She says into the air, the lush green of the forest wrapping them in a blanket. “First the shed, then whatever happened with your dad and just now…” She trails off and Carl doesn’t turn his head. “You don’t have to.”

Carl just continues with Bella trailing at his side. They don't talk, they just walk in silence listening to the sounds of the forest, the chirping of the birds, the creeks of trees, the groaning of a walker-

A walker.

Stopping cold, Bella and Carl strain to listen for the low groans and growls that come from the undead. The duo shares a quick look before they move swiftly towards the sound, bodies dipped low to the ground and footsteps careful of the twigs and leaves on the ground.

The groaning becomes louder as they move closer, and the kids peak over a small wall of rocks. On the other side of the wall is a thin and lanky walker that stands facing them, but the fear that coursed through their living chests is muted by where the walker stands- deep mud that holds the corpse in at its knees.

Hiding behind the wall, Carl’s hand grasps at a palm sized rock, he raises slightly before winding back and throwing the rock directly at the walker. It bounces harshly against the male walker’s bare chest before splatting into the mud. “It’s stuck.” Carl announces as he stands up, the walker had started growling at the rock but now growls in earnest.

“I see that.” Bella comments standing alongside him looking down at the walker. The walker stretches its hands out towards the duo, fingers clenching in a grasping motion. “Come on, we should go back.” Bella calls and turns her shoulder, but Carl throws another rock at the corpse in curiosity.

It bounces off again and the walker tries moving its legs, but the mud does not give. “It’s not going anywhere.” He states simply looking for another rock.

Walking up to Carl’s shoulder, “It’s mud, not cement. What if it breaks free?” She questions him.

Carl looks at her. “Don’t be such a scaredy pants.” He mocks jokingly like she did when they had stood outside the unknowingly, once, walker filled barn.

“Haha.” Bella mocks as Carl moves to walk around to the other side of the mud river. Following behind him, they jump the foot of mud making it to the other side. “Come on, Carl, what are we doing?” She calls as he looks down at the walker.

Carl is in his own world as he grabs at a stick and begins poking at the back of the walker- it twists and turns trying to get at the two happy meals behind it. Bella just watches from behind her friend as he pokes at it- she can’t deny wanting to join in, but Carl was acting weird today… and it’s worrying.

The growling continues as Carl whacks at the walker with the stick, some pieces breaking off from the hits. Bella sighs as she watches Carl, the boy focused on the walker. 

Bella can only think about how they shouldn’t be out here. Her daddy said not to do anything stupid, and they have done quite a few things; stole Daryl's gun, went into the woods without telling anyone, came across a walker, is now messing with the walker, and has yet to run away from the walker that wants to eat their faces. Hopefully their list of stupidity doesn’t increase-

“Arghh-” The walker growls louder along with the suction slurp of its leg pulling from the thick mud. 

Carl falls back to the dead pine needle hill and tries crawling back from the walker that skims its rotting fingers against his foot. Jumping quickly, Bella moves forward, Carl screams quietly and grips at her leg as she pulls her gun and swings it roughly against the walker’s temple.

The corpse snaps back and falls into the mud, trapping the creature. “Are you okay?! Did it get you?!” Bella questions as she helps him up the hill, her gun back in its holster. Breathing hard, Carl nods and continues staring at the walker, eyes filled with fear that he tries to overcome. “I told you to leave it alone.” She slaps his shoulder as he stands up.

He shakes her off and his hand drifts to the gun in his waistband. “Should we kill it?”

Bella dances her eyes around the surrounding trees, “What if there are more?” Carl meets her eyes finally and she can barely read him. “It seems pretty stuck now… we should be fine. Come on.” She breathes out and Carl nods with a final look to the corpse before walking up the hill using his hands to help.

Moving through the woods, both kids are on edge worried another walker may come from the trees. Their shoulders brush against each other as they move to camp, “Do you think dad should kill the man?” Carl questions out loud with a small look to his friend.

Bella shrugs and takes a final step out of the woods and into the farm’s fields. “My opinion doesn’t really matter…” The duo are blinded by the sun as they walk back towards the camp.

“If you had to choose.” Carl stresses, “I would.”

Carl sees Bella’s hair shake before he even finishes his words, “You shouldn’t talk like that.” She tells him.

“Why?” He questions defensively.

“It doesn’t suit you.” His friend tells him honestly. They see Lori spot them from the camp’s small hill. “You like saving spiders and bugs…” She states, “but you think your daddy should kill that man. That you would’ve shot Sophia.” 

“Are you saying you wouldn’t?” He asks quickly, something hiding in the back of his words.

Bella stops, the action making Carl turn, “You shouldn’t talk like that.” She tells him truthfully, “I’m supposed to be the bad influence, not you.” She jokes slightly.

Carl rolls his eyes and continues walking, “You’re not a bad influence.” He tells her truthfully and Bella gives him a grateful smile in return. “I just- I wish… I wish I was like you, Bee. All adultish…” He waves his arm over the whole of her and she can’t help the laugh that bubbles out. 

“Too bad…” She laughs, Carl smiling alongside her. “Cause I don’t want you to change.” They make it to the camp and to the waiting figure of Lori.

They are reprimanded slightly for leaving without saying anything but the mother leaves quickly when Maggie asks for some help.

Left alone, Carl and Bella sit in the camp as everyone moves about. 

Chores are completed and Dale moves about the group, asking for their support in keeping Randall alive. And it’s not long when Rick gathers everyone, sending Bella and Carl away with Jimmy into another room. 

Everyone is tense in the main living room where they gather. Rick gives Dale the chance to speak and the conversation explodes. Should Randall just be killed? Made a slave? Maybe he’ll become a part of the group? 

But is that a chance they're willing to take? Him turning on them. Running off to his group and bringing them back to the farm to lay waste to them.

Rick isn’t willing to take that chance… and neither is most of the group. Dale looks around at everyone, eyes filled with disbelief and disappointment. Glenn, Carol, Andrea, T-Dog, all of them were willing to let the boy die and Dale couldn’t believe it. 

With a final word, Dale says he will not be a part of the murder and looks at Daryl, “You’re right, this group is broken.” He tells the redneck before leaving out of the door and heading to his post on the RV roof.

The group in despair move about the day preparing for Randall’s execution or doing anything to avoid thinking about… some are doing both, somehow.

Bella and Carl are forced to sit down and do math problems- as though they really need to know that stuff now. And the sun sets incredibly fast.

The sky is dark, darker than it's been in a long time, as though God knew what they were doing and didn’t want to see it. Or maybe God wanted to make it feel like a bad dream for the group… and not their new reality.

Who’s to say.

Rick had instructed Daryl and Shane to gather Randall from the shed as he prepared the final parts of the execution. 

The sheriff couldn’t decide whether to hang the boy or shoot him. Which is a kinder way to kill someone?

They’ll shoot him. It will be quicker that way.

Rick stands almost paralyzed as the begging of Randall starts to flow into the empty barn. Small lanterns light the barn, not that Randall can see, his entire head is covered in a blind fold but the golden flight dances against the blanket of the cloth.

“Please, you don’t need to do this.” Randall cries and the cloth is pulled from his head. His eyes adjust to the light and he sees Rick standing in front of him, hand resting on his silver revolver. Shane, Daryl, and Rick make a circle around the man blocking his escape.

Even though he wants to run, Randall knows he’d never get far. His leg is injured, his arms are tied behind his back, and he was surrounded. “I’d never hurt y’all I swear!” He begs the man.

And Rick releases a tense breath to look into Randall’s eyes, “Do you want to stand or kneel?” He asks as a last bit of kindness.

Randall begins to cry in earnest, “Please! Please- I swear- I beg you-” Rick’s nod sends Shane forward to knock Randall to his knees, the flaring pain of his leg is nothing in his mind. “You don’t need to do this! I swear! I’d be good- I won’t hurt you!” Tears fall down his cheeks and snot drips from his nose as he kneels in fear. Randall twists on his knees and his muscles tighten with the urge to run… but he can’t and it makes him cry harder.

The men surrounding him can’t help the heartache they feel- Randall’s just a young man trying to survive like them.

But they don’t know if he’s really like them.

Rick raises his gun, the holster letting it slip free easily. Randall swallows some cries and begins to beg quietly, he knows they won’t be heard but we can’t stop his body from letting them free.

With a thick swallow, Rick moves his finger to the trigger, cocks the gun, and… hesitates. 

“Do it, dad.” Heads snap to the barn’s opening and there stands Carl and Bella’s small figures. Rick’s eyes bulge at the sight of the kids and Randall chokes out a cry. “Do it.” He calls out again and Rick’s hand flatters.

Fast steps approach the kids from Shane, “Are you kidding me? What'd I say to you?” He growls at the pair moving forward, his body acting as a wall, “What did I say to you?” He calls again as he grabs at both of them and drags them out of the barn.

Rick holds his gun high for only a minute- he should pull the trigger, he should finish this… he drops his gun, sliding it back into his holster. “Take him away.” He commands. Daryl gives Rick a meek nod and slips the hood over Randall’s head to drag him away, the boy mumbles incoherently as they go.

Moving out the barn, Rick can barely look at Carl and Bella as they watch Randall leave- so he leads them back to the camp.

The Atlanta group, plus Maggie and excluding Dale, stand in the camp waiting for the gunshot to ring out. Everyone holds their breaths as Rick, Shane, Bella and Carl walk into the camp. Rick can feel their eyes digging into his skin.

“We’re going to keep him in custody for now.” Rick calls out and a mixture of emotion dances across everyone’s faces- except Lori’s.

She watches Rick’s face closely, “Carl, go to the house.” She doesn’t turn her head to look down at the boy. “Now, please.” She calls again. 

Carl nods simply and walks away, Shane nearly drags Bella alongside him to the house. “I cannot believe you two.” Shane says more to himself than the kids. “I told you both to stop doing stupid shit.” Bella and Carl converge onto the deck, “Just get inside and stay there. Try not to do anything stupid again. Okay?” He tells them and turns stalking off back to the camp.

Glenn and Maggie stand on the deck near the kids and move to usher them inside as Lori comes back up to the house- whatever she and Rick talked about over quickly.

But the blood curdling scream from the field causes them all to stop cold.

“What was that?” Glenn calls out as a few unrecognizable bodies in the darkness rush towards the screams.

Lori pushes Bella and Carl closer to the house and commands them to stay before darting away.

“Go look!” Maggie cries out to Glenn who rushes over, rifle in hand.

It’s Daryl that reaches the screams first.

A walker over a fighting body.

A walker over Dale.

Diving at the corpse, Daryl rolls it to the ground to grip its naked torso tightly before driving his blade deep into the walker's head. 

Daryl crawls ten feet to Dale that lays on the ground. His beige wife-beater-tank is torn open at his stomach, blood pooling to the ground. 

The walker had torn through Dale’s stomach, tearing at the skin and exposing his insides, his intestine bulging up and touching the night’s air. Daryl’s eyes go wide and he swings his arms in the air, “Help! Over here! Help! Run! Hang in there, buddy.” He calls again to Dale.

He grabs at his own injury, the site nauseating.

“Who is it?” Rick calls darting up to the site. The sheriff and the duty slide to a stop at the site, the twinge of pain coursing through their chests. Dale and Shane may not have gotten along but no one deserves this… almost no one according to Shane.

Rick bending down, Dale’s pained filled eyes look up to Rick beggingly. “Okay, hold on now. Get Hershel!” Rick screams into the air and other converge on the scene; Andrea, T-Dog, Glenn, Patriia, everyone is standing around the dying man.

Pushing through the bodies, Hershel comes through his shirt thrown on half haphazardly, “What happened?” Andrea cries over Hershel’s words as she drops to her knees next to Dale, his blood seeping into the dirt at her knees.

“Can we move him?”

The farmer shakes his head sadly, “He won't make the trip.”

Rick nods and turns to Glenn, “You have to do the operation here. Glenn, get back to the house-”

“He won’t make the trip.” Herschel explains. Even if they could save Dale, a walker ripped him open… who’s to say he isn’t infected now. 

The group cries and hiccups as they stare down at the man who was a beacon of kindness in this new world of pain, a man they all found solace in. He’s going to die.

Through the cries, Carl and Bella had found their way over, slipping past the bodies to see. Carl recoiled at the site but quickly caught the site of the walker. And time slowed as he approached slowly.

The walker. A dead man with a bare chest and muddy legs… it was the walker. Carl turns and pushes past Carl to dive into his mother’s arms, tears falling from his face. Bella just stands with a stone face looking down at it.

“Somebody do something!” Andrea cries, drawing everyone’s eyes to her.

Ric swallows hard as he raises his gun to Dale's head and hesitates just like he did with Randall.

Dale gurgles and bubbles out blood soaked cries and chokes as he dies slowly and painfully on the grass. 

A hand touches Rick’s pushing the gun away and Daryl steps forward with his own. He raises the metal towards Dale’s head as he crouches down alongside him.

And with his final burst of strength Dale meets the gun at his temple and gives the redneck a grateful smile that’s twisted in pain. Daryl nods goodbye in his own version of sadness as he puts his finger on the trigger.

“I'm sorry, brother.”

Chapter Text

The new day is cold.

Bodies bustling into the farmhouse and back out- tearing down tents and moving things inside the four secure insulated walls of the house. The smaller vehicles have been backed up to the front door to make carrying the supplies inside easier, everyone working together.

“It'll be tight, 14 people in one house.” Lori says as she pulls a large bin from the bed of the rusty truck. T-Dog moves swiftly to take it from her hands and carry it inside. She gives him a small thank you with a hand to his shoulder.

Hershel pulls at his own bin, “Don't worry about that.” He calls to the mother. Lori is bundled in a vest and long sleeves- the weather had taken a turn, and tents wouldn’t be warm enough for any of them, especially at night.

Maggie comes over, her truck load finished, “With the swamp hardening, the creek drying up… With 50 head of cattle on the property, we might as well be ringing a damn dinner bell.” She states leaning against the cold metal of the truck.

“She's right. We should've moved you in a while ago.” Hershel admits. After the barn fell and Dale’s death, all of the Greenes had come to agree that the walkers weren’t people- not anymore. They were once but that person is gone leaving only the rotting shell behind.

Lori gives them a grateful smile and closes the butt of the truck. 

It had been two days since Dale died. A funeral was held the following afternoon once his body was moved, and his grave dug next to those of the fallen Greene family and Sophia. The groups mourned, Dale’s death hitting everyone hard in a way that hurt.

Rick swore to Dale’s grave… to his group that were becoming his family, that they would be better- that the group wasn’t broken, and they would prove it.

And with his funeral, the talk of the prisoner and his failed execution came into conversation. Carl and Bella were forced to do so many chores that they didn’t have time to wander the farm, the chores a poor substitute for a lecture from their parents.

Glenn had run to the small clothing store in town with Maggie at his side to gather some warmer clothes, what little they had were already being worn and it wasn’t enough to fight the chill of the air. 

Rick walks up to the gathered group, “All right, let's move the vehicles near each of the doors facing out toward the road.” He calls out, trusting the group to go without assigning specific people to the task. “We'll build a lookout in the windmill, another in the barn loft. That should give us sightlines on both sides of the property.” He points to each and looks over everyone who nods in understanding. “T-Dog, you take the perimeter around the house. Keep track of everyone coming and going.” T-Dog comes down the steps and adjusts the gloves on his hands.

“What about standing guard?” The dark man asks.

“I need you and Daryl on double duty.”

Hershel moves in front of Rick, “I'll stock the basement with food and water, enough that we can all survive there a few days if need be.”

“What about patrols?” Andrea questions.

“Let's get this area locked down first.” He tells the blonde, “After that, Shane'll assign shifts while me and Daryl take Randall offsite and cut him loose.” 

Shane, who stands towards the back of the pack, rolls his eyes, “We're back to that now?”

Rick gives a tight look to the man, “It was the right plan the first time around. Poor execution.” 

“That's a slight understatement.” The deputy laughs.

Rick takes a step towards him, “You don't agree, but this what's happening. Swallow it - Move on.” He forces the man, Rick’s voice cold and direct.

“You know that Dale's death and the prisoner that's two separate things, right?” Shane questions out loud as Rick turns away. And the sheriff doesn’t turn around, so Shane walks forward, “You wanna take Daryl as your wingman, be my guest.” He calls as he brushes past Rick’s shoulder and towards the windmill of the farm.

Everyone disperses but Hershel, the doctor approaching Rick’s side, “I see why you're not taking Shane with you.” Rick looks at him, “Just know I've got no more patience where he's concerned.” He tells the man seriously.

“He's turning over a new leaf.” Rick calls but Hershel doesn’t really believe it.

And as the sun continues its journey through the sky Shane is noticeably absent; not that many mind it. Lori tries looking around for the man but can’t spot him, so she drifts down the dirt path that leads to the windmill and barn. 

Carl had taken watch in the barn, wanting to help the group, and he had disappeared swiftly once he told his mom. The boy was obviously troubled, and Lori knew it was because of Dale but he seemed more hurt than she’d thought he would be. 

Drifting slowly to the base of the windmill, Lori raises her eyes up to the lowest level of the supports, the source of the banging that rings louder the closer she gets. “Wouldn't that be easier if you waited for some help?” Lori calls up to Shane. He balances himself against the windmill as he hammers wood planks down, a platform slowly being formed. 

Shane stops for a moment before grabbing another board, “Ain't no use waiting for something that ain't gonna come. No, I'll just-” The hammer raises and slams down, “Just do it all 

myself.”

Lori smiles softly to herself, her mind racing with past memories, “Yeah, you always do, just like that time you showed up Rick fixing our sink.” She jokes to him.

The wind blows and Shane adjusts the board he works on, “Just so you know, that's not the reason your basement flooded. You can thank Rick for that-” He looks down for a second, “Using rubber washers with a metal pipe.” He scoffs and swings his hammer again.

“Please come down.” Lori sighs out with a beg. And for a moment she thinks Shane won’t grant her request, but he drops his hammer and sack of nails on the platform and climbs down slowly. His feet slam down on the dirt and he turns as he brushes his hand free from the dirt and rust that had gathered there. He looks at the woman and she struggles with her words for a moment, “So after Sophia, I, uh… I thought, ‘We'll figure this out.’ You know, we'll heal somehow. After Dale?” She chokes back the sadness in her voice and Shane stares, “This is real. And we can't… Keep it at bay. It's already got us.” The man’s head drops but he looks from under his lashes to Lori. “And it just keeps coming, doesn't it?” She laughs painfully and the man nods in agreement. “I made a mess of things.” She nearly cries, her heart spilling out from her tongue, “I put you and Rick at odds. I don't even know whose baby this is. I can't imagine how hard that is on you.” Shane swallows thickly as Lori admits her truth. “You led us out of Atlanta with no thought for yourself. Do you remember that night?” Her eyes gloss over, “The flames, the– And I'm sitting in our car thinking ‘We're gonna be alright. He's gonna make it alright. We'll get out of here.’ And I never thanked you for that.” Shane shakes his head gently as his heart twists at Lori’s words, “Even though things got… Confused between us, you were there for me. You were there for me. Thank you.” She tells him.

“You don't need to thank me for that.” He tells her softly, looking into her eyes. He can’t help noticing how beautiful she looks; the cold air cuts into her cheeks and brings warmth to her pale skin, her dark hair dances around her porcelain skin, and her eyes are bright even with the small tears glazing them.

She takes a step forward, “Of course I do. Of course I do .” She stresses. “Whatever happened between us, whatever the hell we thought it was– And not just you, but– I'm sorry, Shane.” She tells and Shane looks to her lips, “Please believe me. I am so sorry.” 

Shane doesn’t say anything as she turns and walks away to camp.

As she walks away, Rick walks forward.

Climbing the ladder of the barn, Rick spots the sitting figure of his son easily, the sheriff’s hat bigger than the boy’s shoulders.

Carl turns his head slightly as he hears the groaning of the wooden ladder. Rick comes to the opening and sits alongside Carl, legs dangling out the opening overlooking the pasture. “Mom said you'd be here.” Rick says simply.

“Told her I would stand lookout. I got tired of helping around the house.” Carl pulls his jacket tighter around his body.

Rick sighs and draws out a handgun. The gun Carl had stolen from Daryl’s bike.

Carl looks sharply at the weapon, as though he was offended.

The morning after Dale had died, Carl was a mess of nerves and thoughts. He couldn’t help but think, even now, that it was his fault. He knew he should’ve shot the walker in the woods, but he didn’t, and it followed them. It killed Dale.

Terrified of what had happened, Carl had sought out Shane, knowing he would be slightly more forgiving than Rick and Daryl. The young boy had told Shane what happened before forcing Daryl’s gun into Shane’s hands. The deputy tried to make him keep it but Carl wouldn’t be responsible for anyone else’s death. 

Rick watches Carl’s emotions run across his face. The boy doesn’t reach for the weapon. “Take it.” He speaks again but Carl shakes his head, his eyes looking out to the fields. “What happened to Dale had nothing to do with you.” Carl swallows thickly- Shane told Rick… there’s no reason denying it now.

“He-- he died, dad.”

Rick drops his hand with the gun. He looks forward to the pale green fields. “Feels like there's a lot of that going around.” His voice is low and tired, Carl had never heard it from his dad’s mouth. The sheriff turns his eyes back to his son and his right hand comes to the back of Carl’s head, fingers petting the base of his hair. “That's why I need you. No more kid stuff. I wish you could have the childhood I had, but that's not gonna happen.” Carl looks at his dad, listening closely even as Rick drops his hand from his son. “People are gonna die… I'm gonna die… Mom .” His voice chokes out painfully. But the man recovers quickly. “There's no way you can ever be ready for it. I try to be, but I can't. The best we can do now is avoid it as long as we can, keep one step ahead. I wish I had something better to say, something… Something more profound.” He sighs into the slowly moving air, his breath clouding the air; it disappears as quickly as it comes. “My father was good like that. But I'm tired, son.” Carl stares at his dad, the one man he thought could take on the world and he was tired. Picking his hand back up, Rick puts the gun between them once more, “Please take it.” 

Carl answers with grasping the handgun and resting it atop his thighs. Rick gives him a smile before turning back to the calm of the fields. Their eyes watch the wind blow the tall grass, making it dance in the silence… they just watch.

Until Andrea comes up the ladder of the barn, calling for a shift change. Carl doesn’t want to leave, insisting he can watch for the entirety of the next shift, but Rick leads him away, down the ladder and back to camp, sending him away to help Hershel, Jimmy and Glenn with gathering firewood and sealing the house shut. 

He watches Carl go with a smile that shifts from happy to sad. His son helps with the ‘manly’ chores, which is clear he’s enjoying… but why he’s doing it- it makes Rick want to scream to the skies and curse any god that might be listening.

Why does his son, his wife… Why did everything get ruined? 

Why did God feel the need to hurt everyone like this? To kill millions, destroy childhoods and families… to leave scars that would never heal.

At least not in this lifetime.

Rick doesn’t know. He doesn’t think he’ll ever get the chance to either.

But for now he has a plan; keep his son and his family alive. And he’s going to do it. No matter what.

Losing sight of Carl as he goes with Glenn and Jimmy to gather some more firewood into a wheel barrel, Rick turns his sightline elsewhere, slowly tracking everyone on the farm. His eyes drift across the open scenery as he accounts for everyone and what they're doing.

Andrea was in the barn. T-Dog was finishing up the windmill post. Lori and Carol are moving inside the house with Maggie, Beth, and Patricia, if the noises that filter out of the open front door is anything to go by. Daryl pulls up his motorcycle from his camp site, most of the belongings from there tied onto his back. 

And Bella is sitting by herself next to the camp’s dead fire. Alone. Her dad is nowhere in sight.

Walking towards the girl, Rick rests his hands on his belt. The girl raises her head and gives him a small greeting before turning back to her little task, sharpening a knife. Sighing slightly, Rick stands to the girl's side- Rick can’t help but bite his lip and stalls his words. Bella’s eyes look up to him and the bright blue pierces his own pale blue eyes. “Carl said you two saw the walker that killed Dale.” He speaks.

And the girl nods her head, “Yes, Mr. Grimes. I told him it wasn’t his fault, but he didn’t believe me.” Carl had been insistent to Bella that it was his fault, as if it was both of them out in the woods. She did try to change his mind, but it didn’t work.

Rick nods and drops to his hunches; he twists his hands together tensely. “You two shouldn’t have gone out alone.” He tells her and she once again nods.

“Carl was going, and I followed.”

Her words are quick, and she goes back to sharpening the knife in her hands; it is one of her father’s blades, 4-inch double-sided blade with a sturdy black handle with a dual thumb guard- a completely illegal knife in most states but Shane still had it; he does that.

“Has your dad said anything?” Rick asks broadly to the girl.

Bella stops and her shoulders drop a bit, curled inward in sadness that she tries to hide- children always try. “He apologized to me after the barn, but he’s been kind of quiet since then.”

The Sheriff gives her a gentle smile and looks around a bit, “Do you know where he is now?” He asks.

“No, Mr. Grimes.” Bella shakes her messy head of hair.

“Bella, you’re a smart girl…” He tells her truthfully and the girl pulls back slightly watching Rick’s eyes, “smarter than I think anyone realizes at times.” He laughs and his shoulders drops with a small smile- he knows that she knows something, what exactly that is- he doesn’t know. And he won’t be able to get her to speak.

He couldn’t a year ago when Carl was getting bullied. At their middle school, an 8th grader decided to pick on Carl; pushing him and calling him names… Rick tried to help his son, tried to speak with the parents and teachers but nothing fixed the situation; even Bella wasn’t saying anything, she ‘didn’t see any bullying’. But Rick knew it was happening.  

Until one day the bully got taken to the hospital for falling down the stairs: one broken leg, two bruised ribs, and a concussion. The school was too underfunded to have cameras in the halls and it was during passing, a hectic part of the day when all the students flooded into the halls to get to their next class, and the bully went to do his scheduled harassment of Carl, between 3rd and 4th period, that he fell down the weirdly empty stairs. 

The boy’s parents were livid; they demanded the police get involved, that they were going to sue everyone including Carl and his family because obviously the victim of their son did the pushing. It was only when the trashy parents were reminded that Rick was the Sheriff of the town and he had other witnesses, cops and otherwise, to back Carl up that they shut their mouths, tucked their tails between their legs and ran from the school.

And when Rick, Lori, and Shane took the pair of them out to dinner that night, to get their minds off of everything, did Rick get the voice in the back of his head… Bella knew what happened to the bully. She brushed off every question, joked and laughed with Carl… she acted normal but behind her eyes was buzzed. He didn’t think she could do something like that…

At least back then.

But now? He was sure she would, if her blowing the brains out of a walker to save him was enough to go by… And she likes Carl more than him.

Sticking his hand out, Rick asks silently for the knife in her hands, and she hands it to him without fuss. Rick lets his fingertip brush against the edge of the blade gently, feeling for the sharpness and receiving a sting on the tip of his thumb. “Good job.” He comments as he sticks the slightly bloody thumb to his mouth- the red is gone quickly as though it already healed.

“Thank you, Mr. Gr-”

“Rick!” Daryl’s voice shouts and bodies dash towards the shed.

Raising to his feet, Rick darts forward with Bella at his heels, her knife still gripped tightly in his hand. The entirety of the group gathers at the front of the shed, “What's wrong?” Rick calls the redneck, absentmindedly slipping the blade into the back of his pants. Carl bumps gently into Bella who looks at the empty shed, no Randall in sight.

“Randall's missing.” He tells him.

Lori grabs at her son’s shoulders, “Missing? How.” She questions.

“How long has he been gone?” Andrea adds.

Daryl shakes his head, not knowing the answers to those questions. “The cuffs are still hooked.” He tells Rick, “He must' slipped 'em.”

“Is that possible?” Carol interjects.

Daryl shrugs, “It is if you've got nothing to lose.” And the group shudders in fear. Randall escaped, who knew what he was going to do. Is he going to run? Alone or to his group? Will he bring them back? Maybe he won’t even wait for them. Maybe he’ll take his revenge without them? “The door was secured from the outside.” Daryl tacks on.

“Rick! Rick!” Shane's voice booms from the trees and he pulls his body from the greenery.

Bella calls for him when she sees him. Shane is taunt with adrenaline and his face is bloody; nose probably broken with a deep cut on the bridge, blood crusting on his face. “What happened?!” Bella cries and darts forward as Shane stomps his way up.

“He's armed! He's got my gun!” He growls at the group and merely gives Bella a slight touch to her head even as she worries about him.

“Are you okay?” Carl questions.

“Daddy?!” Bella screams, pulling harshly at Shane’s bloody shirt when he doesn’t respond fast enough, worried tears gathering in her eyes.

Shane nods and finally looks down to his daughter, “I'm fine. Little bastard just snuck up on me.” He growls and looks at Rick, “He clocked me in the face.”

The Sheriff nods and turns to the mass of the group, “All right, Hershel, T-Dog, get everybody back in the house. Glenn, Daryl, come with us.” He commands Glenn and Daryl armed with their own weapons. The urgency stopped no one from arguing.

“T, I'm gonna need that gun.” T-Dog gives the handgun over to the bloody deputy without fuss.

Carol worries her fingers into her shirt, “Just let him go. That was the plan, wasn't it, to just let him go?” She cries out in concern.

Rick checks his ammo, “The plan was to cut him loose far away from here, not on our front step with a gun.” He touches Carl’s head and gives Lori a nod before moving with the other men towards the trees.

Carol shakes her head and grabs at Bella’s shoulders, Shane pushing her back towards the woman, “Don't go out there. Y’all know what can happen.”

“Daddy, you’re hurt!” Bella calls out just as Carl grabs at her arms and pulls her away, Shane gives her a small smile before disappearing into the woods. Bella wants to scream for her daddy- he can’t go out injured like that, it’s getting dark, it’s too dangerous. But Carl forces her to start running and soon they’re locked behind the walls of the farmhouse and staring out to the darkening fields with the rest of the group beside them.

The woods are quiet besides the group's hard breathing and the flattening of the foliage under their feet, the leaves dropping into darkness faster than expected. Slowing to a stop at the head of the pack, Shane points forward, “I saw him head up through the trees that way before I blacked out. I'm not sure how long.” He turns to the others.

Rick nods for them to continue forward, “He couldn't have gotten far. He's hobbled, exhausted-”

“And armed.” Glenn tacks on worriedly. 

“So are we.” Rick responds sharply before stopping and turning to face Daryl. “Can you track him?” He questions the redneck, the man dropped down searching the ground and trees for whatever signs he needed.

They are at least ten minutes of running around the woods deep and there are no tracks, nothing to find Randall. “No, I don't see nothing.” He responds still searching for something.

“Hey, look, there ain't no use in tracking him, okay?” Shane interrupts with his body, Daryl raises up to his full height, “He went that way.” Shane points. “We need to pair up. We spread out, we just chase him down. That's it.” He stresses quickly without much room for discussion in his words. Shane was strung tight; Daryl, Rick, even Glenn, could see it.

Daryl titles his head to the side in wonder, “Kid weighs a buck-25 soaking wet.” He grips the strap of his crossbow across his shoulder, “You trying to tell us he got the jump on you?”

Shane’s eyes turn to stone, “I say a rock pretty much evens those odds, wouldn't you?” He nearly growls.

Jumping between the two, Rick draws everyone’s attention, “Alright, knock it off. You and Glenn start heading up the right flank.” He tells Daryl, pointing in the direction he wanted them to go in. “Me and Shane'll take the left.” The three men nod seriously and tighten their grips even more, if that’s even possible. “Remember, Randall's not the only threat out there. Keep an eye out for each other.” Daryl and Glenn nod together and turn with their weapons ready.

The pairs split up in silence and scan the woods as they walk. Shane and Rick weren’t trackers like Daryl, they knew a bit but there’s nothing in their direction either; no broken leaves or bushes, no foot prints… nothing.

They travel in silence for another ten minutes, the sky fully dark now but the glow of the moon surprisingly bright after the full moon a few nights ago. “Looks like it's busted pretty bad.” Rick comments as he steps over a rock.

Shane gives him a quick look and follows beside him, “It's fine, man. Don't worry about me.” A creak sounds and the duo whips around to the source, nothing in sight. “Probably an animal.” Shane comments as they continue on. 

Time ticks by and the anxiety doesn’t die away even as the air becomes cold. “Does this way feel right?” Rick asks as they wonder, no true path in mind.

“As right as any-” Shane calls as a growl sounds and comes at his left side.

A fat walker tackles the deputy to the ground, the living-dead-pair rolling down a very small hill. Rick runs over swiftly to grasp at the walker as Shane drives a blade into its stomach. It groans, not in pain, but in hunger as its rotten guts pour over Shane’s chest. Hand pulled back, Shane drives the blade into its skull, killing the walker swiftly. Rick pulls at the fat walker with a huff dropping it to the ground.

“You okay?” Rick questions with a hand offered to Shane.

Shane nods and grasps the hand, hopping up quickly. He groans at the blood and guts on his chest, “I’m good. Let’s keep moving. Stay sharp.” He tells Rick, the pair are even more on guard with the walker in the woods; though it seemed to only be the one, thankfully.

The men’s chests rise and fall with hard breaths from the unexpected encounter with the walker and the woods are silent once more. “Snatched your gun, huh?” Rick asks into the quiet air.

Shane nods stiffly and they turn to the open field of the farm. “It's my favorite piece too.” Pushing past the bushes, they slowly walk up the hill, looking out to the shadow of the barn and the farmhouse behind it. “Gonna wish he'd– Wish he'd killed me when I find his sorry ass.” He tries joking.

“You say he got you with a rock?”

Shane nods and comes to a stop to rest for a moment, Randall nowhere to be seen, “That's what I said.” 

Rick walks ahead, looking out to the light farmhouse, “Inside the shed? Cause that door was shut when T-Dog rolled up.” He comments questioningly.

“I saw that too. Must've slipped through the rafters in the roof.” Shane turns his head around before focusing on Rick.

The pair stand twenty feet apart atop the rolling hill. The sky is dark with small beams of light bouncing off the moon and the clouds in the sky. Rick and Shane can just see each other, the details of both of them muddled in the darkness.

Rick sighs and puts his gun around, eyes fully finding Shane who still has his own gun out. “So this is where you planned to do it?”

Shane’s eyes turn dark as he looks at Rick, and he gives him a tight nod. “It’s as good a place as any.” He responds, his finger finding the trigger of his gun.

Chapter Text

The pair stand twenty feet apart atop the rolling hill. The sky is dark with small beams of light bouncing off the moon and the clouds in the sky. Rick and Shane can just see each other, the details of both of them muddled in the darkness.

Rick sighs and puts his gun down, eyes fully finding Shane who still has his own gun out. “So this is where you planned to do it?” His voice is calm and tired, the energy around him calm… like the waves before a storm.

A stark contrast to Shane, he’s in the storm, the wind is rushing and he fights against it even though he wants to dance with its destruction. His eyes turn dark as he looks at Rick, and he gives him a tight nod. “It’s as good a place as any.” He responds, his finger finding the trigger of his gun.

Rick nods slowly, eyes dancing around the area as though he was trying to convince himself this is real; it is real. “At least have the balls to call this what it is…” He calls towards the man, “murder.” Shane’s face twitches at the word but quickly goes back. Rick takes a slight step forward, not truely approaching. “You really believe if you walk back onto that farm alone– No me, no Randall-”

Shane raises his gun to Rick’s head- his brother’s head.  “I want you to hush up.”

“You really believe they're gonna buy whatever bullshit story you cook up?” Rick spits, staring the man down. Rick knew something was coming. He tried- he tried so hard to not let it come to this, to figure out something other than this but… Shane was slipping- hell he already fell down.

Shane smiles at the man. His white teeth are visible in the darkness, grinning like a monster that lurks in a child's closet. “That's just it. It ain't no story.” His voice drifts to Rick’s ears like poison slowly taking over, “I saw that prisoner shoot you down. I ran after him. I snapped his neck.” Rick shallows thickly as Shane approaches with a few steps, gun still high. “It ain't gonna be easy, but Lori and Carl– They'll get over you.” He tells Rick, “They’ve done it before. They're just gonna have to…”

“Why? Why now?” Rick can’t stop himself from asking, “I thought we worked this all out.”

Shane laughs hard, “We tried to kill each other man.” His eyes jump up and down Rick’s figure in judgment, “What you think? We just gonna forget about it all? We're gonna ride off into the sunset together?” 

The anger Rick has tried to suppress is beginning to brim and he can barely contain it, “You're gonna kill me in cold blood? Screw my wife? Have my children-” He moves forward, “ my children – call you daddy? Is that what you want?” He spits harshly, harsher than anything he’s ever said. How dare Shane think he can take that from him. “That life won't be worth a damn. I know you.” Shane rolls his eyes, his lips struggling to not grin manically at the sheriff, “You won't be able to live with this.” Rick nearly whispers.

“What do you know about what I can live with? You’ve got no idea what I can live with- what I live with !” He screams at him. Holstering his gun, Shane spreads his arms wide, “You wanna talk about what I can do, Rick? How about what you can do?” He taps his chest like an ape demanding a fight for dominance, “Here I am. Come on, man.” But Rick doesn’t move, he just stands still. Only a few seconds pass before Shane grabs his gun and raises it again, tired of stalling for so long. “Raise your gun.” He tells Rick.

Rick sighs with a shake of his head, “No. No, I will not.”

“What happened, Rick? I thought you weren't the good guy anymore. Ain't that what you said? Even right here, right now, you ain't gonna fight for 'em?” Shane gabs, yearning for a reaction. “ I'm a better father than you, Rick . I'm better for Lori than you, man.” Rick growls silently as he stares. And Shane keeps screaming at him, “It's 'cause I'm a better man than you, Rick. 'Cause I can be here and I'll fight for it. You come back here… and you just destroy everything!” Shane goes deathly quiet and leans forward a bit, “You got a broken woman. You got a weak boy. You ain't got the first clue on how to fix it.” The words cut deep into Rick’s heart, that was his family- the family Shane was going to kill him over and he speaks about them like that. “Raise your gun.” He commands again standing tall.

His hair shakes side to side, “You're gonna have to kill an unarmed man.” Rick slowly raises his hands into the air in a stance of surrender, “Watch my hand. Nice and easy.” Rick reaches with his right hand to the gun on his waist. Shane watches closely as he grasps the gun and pulls it from its home, the metal is held between two fingers and Rick takes slow steps closer, now twenty feet away. “Now listen to me, Shane. There is still a way back from this.” He tells him as he throws the gun away from both of them, the metal clattering to the soft ground with a thud. “Nothing has happened here. We're gonna lay down our guns and we're gonna walk back to the farm… Together .” Rick’s voice is quiet and begging in nature as he approaches Shane and the weapon pointed at his chest, “Back to Lori. Back to Carl. Back to Bella. Put this all behind us.” Shane’s dark eyes just watch him, finger shaking in restraint over the trigger. The men look at eachother, the darkness no longer concealing every detail of them, and Rick can see past Shane’s eyes and Shan can see into Rick’s without a care. He watches Rick’s eyes for so long he can’t react fast enough; Rick drives the knife in his waistband into Shane’s stomach, the double blade cutting deep into his skin and muscle. 

A single shot rings out before Rick throws Shane’s gun away from his hand. “Damn you for making me do this, Shane.” He growls, pushing the blade deeper and leading Shane to the ground. The man’s hands find Rick’s shirt trying to find relief from the pain of the blade, “This was you, not me! You did this to us!” Rick screams at Shane’s face, even as it goes limp with the rest of his body. “This was you, not me-- not me! Not me!” He screams in pain over his dying friend, looking around the field for something… something he doesn’t know.

Shane stops moving and Rick cries. His brother, his friend, his partner is dead. He killed him- he had to. He couldn’t let Shane live- there was no coming back. He killed Shan e. What is he going to do?

Tears fall and splatter onto Shane’s sweat-soaked shirt, the man’s chest slowing down as blood continues to stain his shirt. Rick can barely catch his breath, any breath he can get out is released in hiccups and shudders. 

Shane’s dead…

“Dad?”

Rick jumps to his feet, whipping around to face his son that slowly approaches the scene, “Carl.” His voice is wet with tears and he tries to wipe his hands clean on his pants as he steps towards Carl. “You should be back home with mom-” Carl draws his gun onto his father as he approaches, now between Carl and Shane. The sight of the gun raised to him is like a hard barrier slamming into his bones, it stops him cold in his tracks, “Just- just put the- put the gun down.” He begs the boy but Carl doesn’t drop it, not as tears begin to brim his eyes and his grip shakes lightly. “It's not what it seems. Please.” Rick cries as Carl pulls the trigger.

And misses.

Misses Rick but finds it’s true target of Shane’s head that came up behind Rick. The sheriff barely sees Shane’s head whip to the side before he collapses to the ground, body still once more.

Rick’s wide eyes turn to Carl who huffs a small cry before slowly approaching; he can’t believe he shot Shane. 

“Daddy!?” A voice screams and the blur of Bella’s body comes running up. Rick tries slowing her but she breezes past faster than he can process, collapsing to Shane’s side. “No! Daddy! Please! Get up!” She screams, begging into his face, shaking his shoulders with a strong grip, “Daddy, get up!” She tries. She screams and cries. Why isn’t he moving? She needs her daddy to wake up- why isn’t he getting up? Rick moves slowly behind her, his heart twisting painfully as he places a hand atop her shoulder. “No! Let me go! We can’t leave him!” She grasps to her dad, flinching from Rick’s touch like it burned her. “No! Daddy! Please!” Carl and Rick watch her cry, watch her beg to whatever was listening- whatever could help her… They don’t know what to do.

“You bit too?” Carl asks thickly, his eyes beading with tears.

Rick shakes his head, “No.”

“Shane was.”

“That wasn't Shane.” He responds as Bella rocks back and forth over Shane’s head, “You know that.”

“Used to be.” Carl looks up and Rick looks into Carl’s bloodshot eyes, “What happened? You guys attacked? I mean, we... we heard a gunshot, but I didn't see any walkers nearby.” Rick doesn’t know how to respond, “How did Shane die?” Rick stares down at his once-friend and his daughter that cries harshly over his body, her eyes drift down his body to the knife in his stomach. Her shaking hand grasps at the blade and pulls it free, a pour of blood following the blade. 

Rick used the man’s own knife against him… he licks his dry lips and his words quiver, no idea or plan in his mind that would be good enough for Carl… and Bella.

He made the girl an orphan. What is he supposed to say?

The air is almost completely quiet as Rick picks his eyes to the forest line and goes rigid. “Oh my god,” he says to himself as the tree line moves with a magnitude of bodies. Carl follows his dad’s line of sight and meets the horror for himself.

Walkers. A herd of walkers that is bigger than anything they’ve ever seen, noticeable in the darkness of the moon. And it’s coming directly for them.

Without a word, Rick moves to Bella, hands grasping at her shoulders and pulling her back. But she fights, hands in a white-knuckle grip on Shane’s arms, “No, Mr. Grimes, please! We can’t leave him!” She screams and Rick gives her a hard tug loosening her grip. But she wiggles out, crawling back to the still body. 

Rick grabs her in an iron grip and pulls her into a fireman's carry to begin jogging away with Carl at his side, the young girl screaming all the while. “We can’t stay!” She cries at Rick’s words and reaches out for her daddy as she’s pulled away, the knife in her hand jiggling limply in her hand.

The sheriff moves quickly with Carl at his side and the clouds in the sky make way for the little light the moon graces the land with, giving way to the site of more and more walkers that pour out of the woods. 

Rick can’t help the swear that escapes his lips, as his eye darts around and lands on the barn. Dashing towards it, Rick slides through the doors, Carl behind him and drops Bella to the ground. His body moves quickly to slam the large wooden doors closed and sealed with a plank of wood.

“We have to go back, Mr. Grimes! Please! We can’t-”

Rick bends down slightly, “Bella, we can’t go back.” But the girl cries and cries, “Look at me.” He grabs at her cheeks to force the girl’s eyes, “There’s too many-”

“We have to try!” She cries.

The red-worn wooden doors of the barn shake inwards as knocks and groans sound from the outside, the first wave of walkers reaching them fast. “We'll try okay? We will try but we have to distract the walkers first.” He tells her, “We have to draw them away from the house.” He tells the two children staring up at him, all of their trust falling like weights onto his shoulders. “I need both of you, okay?” 

The pair nods and Bella sniffles wetly as she tries to take steading breaths. Rick dashes forward and grabs at a gasoline tank. Carl and Bella fall into step with the man and grab at their own smaller metal gas tanks, opening the nozzle and pouring the explosive contents across the dirt floor and up the walls. 

They are going to set the farm ablaze.

The doors shake, they’re so close to snapping open from the force outside. Together the trio watches the doors shake and Rick commands Carl and Bella up the ladder, Bella going up first.

As Carl goes to climb, Rick grabs his arm and hands him a box of matches, “When I say- you drop the matches.” Carl nods in understanding before climbing up the ladder and standing alongside Bella.

Rick looks to the doors with a deep breath before starting forward. Pushing against the wood Rick ignores the sharp sting of splinters all to draw the single plank that keeps them safe from its position. 

And the walkers spill in like a tsunami, bodies dropping to the ground and bodies stepping over those that had fallen, all to get closer to Rick who screams and waves for their attention. The barn fills fast forcing Rick’s heart to hammer faster and faster in his chest. The sheriff forces away a few walkers that get too close as he backs up to the ladder and begins to climb, dead hand brushing against his ankles and shoes.

“Now, Carl!” He screams and the barn goes ablaze. The flames catch fast and the heat licks the bottom of Rick’s legs that rush to move away. Atop the loft of the barn, the trio look down at the bodies that burn without a care. The walkers continue their attempts to get them, hands reaching to the sky, even as their clothes burn into their decaying skin and the flesh starts to pull off their muscles.

The smell that rises is nauseating in their empty stomachs. “Now what?” Carl calls as the walls of the barn start to burn and the floor they stand on starts to burn through their shoes. 

The boy gets an answer with the sound of a car horn. 

Nearly throwing themselves out of the large opening in the barn, they watch as the RV rips into the dirt towards them as other headlights of cars dance in the fields of the farm, gunshots beginning to ring out in the air. 

Jimmy’s voice calls out for them and they listen- their feet slam harshly into the roof of the RV that Jimmy pulls to the side of the burning farm, even as the mass of walkers start to gather at its front.

Their hearts race as they climb down to the solid ground behind the RV and Jimmy screams bloody- the walkers had found their way inside. His dying cries drift away as they run towards the woods, Rick’s hands touching both children to ensure they aren’t snatched from him.

Harsh breaths fill the air where they stand and they take a moment to rest as they watch the dancing lights, the burning barn, and the noises of gunfire and walkers; the dead hadn’t reached them… yet.

Rick grabs at both of them to pull them deeper into the woods but Carl snags his arm free, “We can’t leave mom.” Carl doesn’t let his father say anything, “We can’t.” He stresses.

And Rick nods hesitatingly. He doesn’t want to go back, if Lori’s alive she’ll go to the highway where they lost Sophia- they all will- going back now is suicide, she probably isn’t their anymore… but he can’t tell Carl that.

With a quick look, they start towards the house, darting around walkers and knocking some down- Rick knocking some down. The car lights are gone now, the red brake lights disappearing from the fields and into the darkness- they’ve left and Rick’s now in the middle of the herd with two kids.

Boom!

A gunshot rings out and the kids follow Rick as he rounds the house, gun drawn. In the light of the house, Hershel stands at its steps blowing the heads off of any walker that gets too close with the rifle that lays tightly in his hands. 

The doctor drops his weapon to reload, letting a walker get close but its head is blown away by Rick’s own gun. Whipping his head around, Hershel looks to the trio that tries to catch their breath, “Where's Lori? Did you see Lori?” Rick questions getting closer.

“I don't know what happened, Rick. They just keep coming.” Hershel calls without answering the sheriff. “It's like a plague. They're everywhere!” He cries out.

Grabbing the man’s shoulder, Rick looks tensely at him, “Lori! Did you see her?” Hershel shakes his head and the trio drops their heads. Rick looks around and begins to push Hershel towards one of the last escape routes they have, the farm filling with more and more walkers; one nearly every ten feet apart.“We have to go. Find mom and the others.”

But Hershel tries fighting, just as Bella did, “It's my farm!”

“Not anymore!” He growls and pulls the man’s top harshly. The group darting away to the woods as the barn fully collapses to the ground, the supports burned away.

Hitting the edge of the fields, they all look out to the farm once more. “We’ll come back, right?” Bella nearly cries, as she holds herself tightly.

Rick doesn’t answer as he leads them all away and towards a, hopefully, safer place.

Chapter Text

The sun is rising after miles of walking, pausing and then continued walking. The dark forest was not the place any would walk through in their right mind and with half dead and hungry corpses walking around it was even less desirable but there was no choice.

And now, real light begins to grace the sky, taking the strain off their eyes. Hershel, Rick, Carl, and Bella drag their tired and aching legs up the last few feet to the paved highway they once stayed; no one else is there waiting. 

Carl looks to his dad, repressed angry coming to the surface. “Wait, where's mom? You said she'd be here.” Rick sighs and doesn’t look his son in the eye. “W... we gotta go back for her.” He calls out.

“Carl…”

“No. Why are we running?” The boy growls out, looking around. “What are you doing? It's... It is mom.” Rick’s face crumples at Carl’s words and the boy pulls back slightly. “We need to get her and not be safe a mile away.” He begs.

Rick nods and waves a hand, “Shh. You need to be quiet, all right? Please.” Even though there are no walkers around them doesn’t mean that won’t change in a moment.

“Please… It's mom.”

“Look, Carl, listen…” But Carl turns away, walking to a car a few feet away. 

Rick is lost. 

Bella sits on the ground, knees drawn tightly to her chest, in silence. Her eyes are bloodshot and puffy from her crying and even though Rick is happy she’s no longer crying, the girl’s silence is much worse. And Carl is angry at him, fuming by a rusting car.

“You've got to get your boy and her to safety.” Hershel’s voice cuts through Rick’s thoughts. Lifting his head, Rick looks towards the older man. “I'll wait here for my girls and the others. I know a few places. We'll meet up at one of them later.” 

Rick shakes his head, “Where? Where is safe?” He asks, wanting an answer but knowing he won’t get one. “We're not splitting up.” He finalizes and turns away… or tries to.

“Please, keep them safe.” The old man begs quietly, the pair keeping their voices low. “I'll hide in one of the cars. If a walker gets me, so be it.” Rick turns to him, face drawn in pain and shock. “I've lost my farm. I've lost my wife and maybe my daughters.”

“You don't know that. They'll be here.” Rick stops him hopefully.

“And you don't know that.”

“You're a man of God.” Rick hisses in the man's face, “Have some faith.”

Hershel gives the sheriff a tired smile before raising his eyes gently to the sky for a moment, “I can't profess to understand God's plan, but Christ promised the resurrection of the dead.” A painful look grows on his face, “I just thought he had something a little different in mind.”

And Rick stays quiet for a moment, “We stick together.” He says simply before going to bring Carl closer.

The group is quiet as Rick leads Carl over to Bella, the two grabbing onto each other like a lifeline. And the father looks down at them, two lights of innocence darkening with each day they live in this world. 

He hates it but there’s nothing he can do… not after everything that has happened. As Rick’s mind races… so does Bella’s.

Her daddy is dead. What is she supposed to do? He’s been by her side, teaching her, caring about her since she was a baby. He watched over her and put his own life on hold for her and now… he’s gone. And she didn’t even get to say goodbye.

It was those walkers, she tells herself. The walkers… that herd, that attacked them and forced Carl to shoot him. Those undead pieces of shit that took her daddy from her and made Carl pull the trigger. She’s going to kill them all… even if it's the last thing she does. 

Before her mind can start dreaming of her revenge, her body is forced to stand. Squeezed between Carl and Rick, the group moves slowly as a walker groans and drags its body down the highway, away from the farm… back towards the CDC.

“I don't know how much longer we can stay here.” Hershel whispers to them all.

Carl looks up to Rick, “I... I'm not leaving without mom.”

And he nods, not willing to leave Lori and anyone else that may have gotten away. “So, we're just gonna walk away?” He questions Hershel, “Not knowing if my wife, your girls are still out there? How do we live with that?” Bella stands in silence, barely listening.

“You've only got one concern now… Just one…” He tells honestly. “Keeping them alive.” Rick looks down to the kids, biting his lip painfully in the hopes it keeps him in the present. “Nature may be throwing us a curveball, but that law is still true.”

And Rick can’t believe it, the thought of leaving drifting through his head, but what other choice does he have. It’s midday now by the position of the sun, if anyone was going to show up they’d be here by now.

With a nod to the doctor, Rick goes to bend down but a rev stops him. Jumping up, he sees a line of vehicles come down the partially cleared highway and barely stop before bodies are jumping out of them. 

Lori darts forward to her son, grabbing him tight. Maggie and Beth hug their father tightly in his arms- Carol, Daryl, Glenn, and T-Dog joining the group reunion. 

Rick smiles as he looks at everyone, “Where'd you find everyone?” He questions Daryl, the man had led the line of cars back on his motorcycle, Carol holding tight to his back.

“Well, those guys' tail lights zigzagging all over the road... figured he had to be Asian, driving like that.” He jokes.

And Glenn half smiles, “Good one.”

“Where's the rest of us?” The redneck responds.

Rick shakes his head, “We're the only ones who made it so far.”

Lori looks up from kissing Carl’s head, “Shane?” And the group goes cold when they realize he’s dead. They look over to the girl he had left behind, Bella sitting once more with the blade covered in her father’s blood in her lap, her eyes staring numbly at it.

“Andrea?” Glenn questions as the girl starts to move slightly at the feeling of eyes on her.

Carol sniffles and crosses her arms, “She saved me, then I lost her.”

“We saw her go down.” T-Dog calls from his resting place against an open truck door.

“Patricia?” Hershel calls looking around.

From his chest, Beth looks up slightly, “They got her, too. Took her right in front of me. I was…” She hiccups harshly and holds tight to her dad’s shirt, “I was holdin' onto her, daddy. She just…” A cry is sniffled into Hershel’s chest before she looks up, “What about Jimmy? Did you see Jimmy?”

Rick shakes his head once more, the constant action starting to hurt, “He was in the RV. It got overrun.” He says mournfully.

“You definitely saw Andrea?” Carol asks again.

Lori shrugs, “There were walkers everywhere.”

“Did you see her?” She stresses. The rest of them, they saw die, but Andrea… she fell and that’s it. No blood. No screams. No body.

Daryl adjusts his crossbow. “I'm gonna go back.”

“No.” Rick stops him.

Glenn looks at Rick, “We can't just leave her.” He states.

Lori sighs, “We don't even know if she's there.”

“She isn't there. She isn't.” Rick’s voice is hard, “She's somewhere else or she's dead . There's no way to find her.” He tells them.

And Glenn pulls back slightly, “So we're not even gonna look for her?” He questions. He doesn’t want to leave her; he doesn’t want to leave anyone behind… So why does Rick?

“We gotta keep moving. There have been walkers crawling all over here.” He calls, his voice preparing everyone to move.

T- Dog stands tall, “I say head east.”

Daryl nods and pulls his crossbow off his shoulder, “Stay off the main roads.” He pulls its string back and slips in a bolt with easy movements, “The bigger the road, the more walkers, mo’ assholes like this one.” A walker comes from behind them, the same one that passed only a while ago. “I got him.” Daryl calls as the walker falls, the bolt now in its eye.

They gather into the vehicles without much fight and begin driving, away from the highway, away from the farm… away to somewhere else.

They drive for five hours, night approaching in the hour to come and no shelter to be seen. A single honk rings out and the line of cars stop on the road that is surrounded only by trees.

Everyone drags themselves out of the car to gather at the front. “You out?” Daryl questions atop his motorcycle.

Rick nods and looks around, “Running on fumes.”

“We can't stay here.” Glenn calls out with his gun in hand, eyes darting around like a monster is going to pop out at any time. 

Maggie holds her own weapon, “We can't all fit in one car.”

“We'll have to make a run for some gas in the morning.” Rick says simply looking around. The air is cold, really cold, and the group is on edge. They should be with all that’s happened within the last few hours; Randall ‘escaping’, Shane dying, the barn burning, the farm getting overrun, and all the deaths. They’ve barely mourned from the CDC and now here they are, so many deaths Rick can’t even remember all of them.

”Spend the night here?” Carol questions.

“I'm freezing.” Carl calls out and Lori grabs at him from behind, trying to give him some of her warmth.

She rubs her hand over his chest, hoping to generate some heat, “We'll build a fire, yeah?” She smiles down to him.

“You go out looking for firewood, stay close. Only got so many arrows.” Daryl says.

T- Dog nods towards the redneck gaining his attention, “How you doing on ammo?”

“Not enough.”

Maggie looks around like she is standing in the middle of an idiot contest, “We can't just sit here with our asses hanging out.” She growls at them.

“Watch your mouth.” Hershel demands of her sharply, causing her to snap her mouth closed. Eyes turn towards the doctor, “Everyone stop panicking and listen to Rick.” He tells them. And some calm down, the doctor was a strong-willed man and his words are not ignored easily.

Rick looks around as eyes fall onto him, ready to listen. “All right, we'll set up a perimeter. In the morning, we'll find gas and some supplies. We'll keep pushing on.”

Maggie leans forward with a quieter voice, “Glenn and I can go make a run now, try and scrounge up some gas.”

“No, we stay together. God forbid something happens and people get stranded without a car.”

Glenn looks at him sadly, “Rick, we're stranded now.” He points out the obvious, looking around the empty backwater road.

And Rick nods knowingly, “I know it looks bad, we've all been through hell and worse, but at least we found each other.” Everyone listens quietly, Rick’s aura has changed… and they can all see it. “I wasn't sure... I really wasn't... but we did. We're together. We keep it that way.” He takes a breath, “We'll find shelter somewhere. There's gotta be a place.” Rick’s voice is hopeful.

But Glenn can’t share his hope, his eyes dance around and he takes a step forward, “Rick, look around. Okay? There's walkers everywhere. They're migrating or something.”

“There's gotta be a place not just where we hole up, but that we fortify, hunker down, pull ourselves together, build a life for each other.” He tells them, “I know it's out there. We just have to find it.” He growls out, trying to force everyone and himself to believe.

The group as a whole has a hard time believing it, everything that’s happened… it’s understandable to not believe. “Even if we do find a place and we think it's safe, we can never be sure. For how long?” Maggie questions. “Look what happened with the farm. We fooled ourselves into thinking that that was safe.”

Rick nods. “We won't make that mistake again.” He promises strongly. “We'll make camp tonight over there, get on the road at the break of day.” He calls pointing out to the side of the road where old rock walls stand, perhaps once an old farmhouse or something; but it's long since been abandoned. 

Carol leans towards Daryl, the woman taking a kind of liking to the man. She believes the two of them are loners of sorts, outcasts compared to the rest of the group. “Does this feel right to you?” She asks him.

Beth curls under her dad's arm. “What if walkers come through, or another group like Randall's?” She asks Rick.

Daryl tilts his head towards Rick, “You know I found Randall, right? He had turned, but he wasn't bit.” He tells Rick. Most of the group already knew this, Daryl and Glenn had gotten back to the house before the walkers came from the woods and questioned what had happened. Then the barn started to burn, and the conversation was set aside. 

“How's that possible?” Beth questions as Rick turns his back to the group and bows his head.

Lori looks at his back, “Rick, what the hell happened?’

“Shane killed Randall.” Daryl calls looking towards the car that Bella is still sitting in, the girl not caring to get out- she can hear just fine from the open window. “Just like he always wanted to.”

“And then the herd got him?” Lori asks, pressing Rick. She knows him. They were high school sweethearts; they’ve been together a long time, and she knows when he’s hiding something.

Hell at this point everyone can see him struggling to keep something hidden. And he decides to stop keeping the secret, “ We're all infected .” He says simply, the air freezing over all of them. 

They’re all infected? 

How are they all infected?

Wouldn’t they have turned by now?

What the hell happened to infect them all?

All questions that drift through the group’s mind. And one similar thought… What’s the point of living if they’re all going to end up as walkers?

Rick sighs as another weight falls off his shoulders, “At the CDC, Jenner told me. Whatever it is, we all carry it.”

“And you never said anything?” Carol cries in anger.

Rick turns slowly to look at them. Disbelief and betrayal cursed in their eyes. “Would it have made a difference?” He says simply.

Glenn moves forward, “You knew this whole time?”

“How could I have known for sure? You saw how crazy that moth…”

“That is not your call.” Glenn interrupts sharply, “Okay, when I found out about the walkers in the barn, I told, for the good of everyone.” He spits.

Rick nods and tilts his head slightly, “Well, I thought it best that people didn't know.” He tells the young man forcing him to pull back. 

And Rick gives them all a once over before walking a distance away from the group, letting them all take in the new reality and start making camp for the night.

The sun falls quickly but T-Dog and Daryl are quick to gather firewood and light the only source of warmth they have.

Gathered around the fire, everyone is silent. T-Dog stands guard close to the group, only fifteen feet away, close enough to hear the conversation.

Carol is wrapped in a blanket on the ground, “We're not safe with him… Keeping something like that from us.” She whispers to Daryl… whisper isn’t the right word because Lori and Carl can still hear her, everyone can still hear her, from around the fire. “Why do you need him? He's just gonna pull you down.” She tells him.

The redneck shrugs, the adrenaline of the day pulling them all into a numb state. “No. Rick's done all right by me.”

Carol rolls her eyes. “You're his henchman and I'm a burden. You deserve better.”

Daryl stops wiping at his crossbow with a dirty rag. “What do you want?” He looks to the side at her.

“A man of honor.”

“Rick has honor.” His words make Carol go silent.

And Maggie takes the chance to speak to her family, “I think we should take our chances.” Her hands are gripped tight around her gun in anxiety.

Hershel looks to her sharply, “Don't be foolish. There's no food, no fuel, no ammo.” His words are truthful and even though they know it to be true, they don’t want to believe it.

Maggie bites at her lips wanting to argue back but a creak sounds in the surrounding trees, forcing everyone to jump on edge. “What was that?” Beth questions, pulling close to Hershel.

Daryl stands slowly, cocking his crossbow into a loaded position. “Could be anything. Could be a raccoon, could be a possum-”

“Walker.” Glenn adds to the list.

Carol jumps to her feet, “We need to leave. I mean what are we waiting for?” She cries, creating a mini frenzy and others to stand alongside her.

Glenn looks around, “Which way?”

Maggie points towards an opening, “It came from over there.”

“Back from where we came.” Beth reminds them all.

But Rick comes into the open, “The last thing we need is for everyone to be running off in the dark.” His words are harsh, “We don't have the vehicles. No one's traveling on foot.”

“Don't panic.” Hershel tells the group of panicked people.

Maggie stares in the direction of the noise, hands ready to raise her weapon and pull the trigger, “I'm not… I'm not sitting here, waiting for another herd to blow through.” She calls out before looking harshly at Rick, “We need to move, now.” She demands.

“No one is going anywhere.” Rick states harshly, everyone going quiet and looking at him- Lori and Carl haven’t even stood knowing Rick wouldn’t give in.

The air is silent as Rick looks at them all. 

“Do something.” Carol hisses sharply at Rick.

The man snaps at her words, “I am doing something! I'm keeping this group together, alive.” He growls at her, Carol drawing back slightly. “I've been doing that all along, no matter what. I didn't ask for this.” Rick snaps, everything in him is snapping. His contained anger and resentment for the people he’s tried to protect that don’t respect him for all he’s done is coming to the surface. The floodgates have opened and he wasn’t going to try stopping it… not anymore. 

“ I killed my best friend for you people, for Christ's sake! ” He growls at them all. And if the air was cold, it was now ice cutting them all deeply. Carl turns to cry into his mother’s arms, Lori learning of the truth only an hour early when Rick walked away from them all. 

And now the man looks down at all of them. “You saw what he was like, how he pushed me, how he compromised us, how he threatened us.” His voice is still, even as he speaks. “He staged the whole Randall thing, led me out to put a bullet in my back. He gave me no choice. He was my friend, but he came after me .” He growls out, “My hands are clean .” He looks around at the people he’s started to call friends- started to call family. They are silent at the man’s words… What are they supposed to say? 

Looking around at the group’s faces Rick stands taller, “Maybe you people are better off without me. Go ahead.” He offers with a wave of his hand. “I say there's a place for us, but maybe... maybe it's just another pipe dream. Maybe... maybe I'm fooling myself again.” A slight pause. “Why don't you... Why don't you go and find out for yourself? Send me a postcard.” He hisses at them. “Go on, there's the door. You can do better?” He points again to one of the openings of their little camp. “Let's see how far you get.” He growls. “No takers? Fine. But get one thing straight... you're staying-” He looks down at all of them, the muffled cries of his son doing nothing to stop him, “This isn't a democracy anymore.”

No one moves. They won’t go. Rick knows they won’t. They aren’t strong enough by themselves. They’re impulsive and quick to action. The only one he could think to survive would be Daryl. But the rest… they needed each other. So they would stay together as one; they’ll watch each other's backs, they’ll protect each other, listen to reason,... they won’t fight each other; not anymo-

“You killed him?” Bella's dry crackled voice calls out from the darkness.

And Rick goes still in his place… everyone does.

As the girl comes into the light of the fire, Rick looks sadly at the girl. “Bella…”

The light makes her eyes bleed red instead of blue, “You killed my daddy?!” She screams at him and it seems like the group has remembered she was still there.

Rick puts his hands up, “Bella, please be qui-”

The girl throws a rock full speed at his head, her aim spot on had Rick not dropped his head. With the distraction, she runs full speed in anger at the man, the knife that she pulled from her daddy’s stomach now tightly in her hand.

Rick dodges the down stab of Bella’s hand, the knife cutting into the air. With her little fighting experience, she is quick to bring the blade swing up, the tip slicing a shallow cut into Rick’s check. 

 “Daryl!” Rick calls out but the redneck has already begun moving towards them.

Behind the girl, Darly grabs the arm with the blade and wraps the other tightly around her shoulder to her hip. She’s stronger than he expected and she fights hard to drive her knife into Rick’s stomach, just as she assumes he did to her daddy.

Rick watches Bella fight in Daryl’s arms and touches his check lightly, a small trail of blood following, barely noticeable in the fire’s light. 

Bella growls like an animal and drives her head down, her jaw locking tight onto Daryl's forearm. Blood blooms in her mouth and she tugs hard for Daryl to throw her to the grow, the knife scattering from her hand and from her grasp as she lands on her hands and knees. He growls at the wound that will scar his forearm- probably for the rest of his life.

Spitting a mixture of saliva and blood from her mouth, Bella grabs at the gun on her waist. Rick quickly moves and grabs the hand to hold the gun to the sky. Bella swings harshly at him with her free hand but he grabs her other arm in a second iron tight grip, bruises already beginning to form; if only the girl cared. But it only leads her to growl and kick at Rick’s shins.

Carl cries out to her from behind but all she can see is red… a red she wants to see stain her hands.

But her thoughts of revenge disappears as Daryl laces his arm around her neck- a chokehold, just like her daddy did to him. His hold is tight but not tight enough to choke her, just enough to hold her still.

Bella’s free hand shoots to Daryl’s arm, an arm of grown muscle honed to hunt, grasping at it as though she could pull it free. 

Rick pulls her gun free and slips it into his waistband. The site makes Bella fight even harder. The wound on Daryl’s arm pouring out blood with how hard he flexes to keep the girl still.

Her body twists and turns as she tries to throw herself free. As she tries to kick at the man that huffs in tense breaths at the sight of the girl.

And she begins to scream. “I’ll kill you!” Her voice screeches into the night’s air. “I’ll kill you, Rick Grimes!” She promises loudly. Daryl isn’t willing to put his hand over the girl’s mouth, already proving she will bite. So with the nod from Rick, he tightens his arm, stopping the air the young girl can breathe. Her limbs slow as she promises Rick death, as she gaps like a fish in the air.

“I'm gonna kill…you…” She whispers once more into the air before her eyes close and the cries disappear.

To Be Continued…

Chapter Text

She's Always Smiling

⚘↠Finding Comfort↞⚘

Part Two

Chapter 1: Attempt #13: Fail

Chapter 2: Dropping Bodies

Chapter 3: Rats in a Maze

Chapter 4: all we need is some stitches

Chapter 5: Friendly Fight

Chapter 6: Out for a Hunt

Chapter 7: Bleeding Deep

Chapter 8: What to Do

Chapter 9: Name?

Chapter 10: Spreading Our Horizons

Chapter 11: An Old Friend

Chapter 12: A New Friend

Chapter 13: I ain't calling you my savior

Chapter 14: Try it, I dare you

Chapter 15: They're starting to lookalike

Chapter 16: Taking Aim 

Chapter 17: Making a Choice

Chapter 18: Just Like Old Times

Chapter 19: The Devil on Your Shoulder

Chapter 20: Prey or Pray? TBD

Chapter 21: Welcome to the Tombs TBD

Part 3: Death of The Daylilies (1/6/2025)

Chapter Text

Most people would agree that 3 attempts of utter failure would be enough to quit trying… but not Bella. 

The 3 attempts were just a warm-up for her, a slight bump in the road to her victory. And now the number hits 13; 13 failed attempts at killing Rick Grimes.

She’s tried a variety of things to get Rick Grimes six feet under: stabbing, poisoning, shooting, a walker knocked in his direction… but none have worked. Nothing has worked.

But that’s okay. The voice inside her head tells her. You’re just finding his weakness , it whispers from the darkness of her consciousness.

The voice may give her the will to follow through on her promise, but her heart makes her weak. She barely eats. She barely drinks, barely talks. She just exists… exists to wait for the next moment to kill Rick. To kill her daddy’s killer, It whispers.

So here she sits as the car speeds over bumps and cracks in the pavement road, another backwater road in the hopes a herd doesn’t pass them by. Her eyes burn into the side of Rick’s head as he drives one of the three vehicles of the pack; he’s used to the burn though. Used to the constant danger from the young girl.

She’s twelve years old now, and Carl will soon follow in the next few months if the weather is anything to go by. The group was thankful that the winter wasn’t too harsh. But the snow is gone now, and they are back on the road, traveling from building to building in search of any useful supplies and a place to stay.

Even if it's only for a few weeks; Lori needs it. The eight months filled her belly with a baby that was itching to come out into the world. If the baby had any idea of the world it was coming into, it would stay in Lori’s belly permanently.

The car train pulls to a stop and Bella crawls from the car, eyes trained on Rick’s figure as he moves and speaks. The group pulls together to find a new direction to head in, Carl on point. The boy has been quiet and calculating, trying to follow after his father; if Bella didn’t want Rick dead, she’d be almost impressed with the boy… except for the large and goofy-looking silencer on his gun.

He looks stronger, most of the group does. Built up with lean muscle and dirt covering their skin, they’ve lived on the road blanketed in constant danger for eight months and it can be seen with one look at them; that even Beth, the sweet girl turned stronger with the danger.

All of them are stronger… except for Bella.

Her ribs can be seen through her skin, her eyes sinking in her sockets with dark circles around them. Her skin is unnaturally pale as though she was another walking corpse. The fact she can even stand is a surprise to everyone.  

Breaking from their small discussion, T-Dog takes Carol, Hershel, and Beth down to a small stream that can be heard breaking against small stones about thirty feet away. Maggie and Glenn stay at the cars with Lori, Carl, and Bella to look through their current supplies. Rick and Daryl disappear into the woods to search for something to eat; the group going low on food.

Trailing through the woods, Rick and Daryl mumble words to each other, “Could’ve left her on the side of the road,” Daryl partially jokes to Rick as the redneck’s eyes dart side to side. Rick rolls his eyes and gives the man a sideway glance, “Nah, you’re right. Bella’s a vengeful bitch, she’d still find ya.” He calls as they flow out onto abandoned train tracks.

Trailing down the path a small way, Rick nods in turn, “Yes she is…” He hates to admit it, but Rick had once thought of leaving the young girl behind but leaving her would be the same as killing her… and he couldn’t do that. Even with her constant threatening presence, he couldn’t do it, he just couldn’t. “We need to find a place… even if it’s only for a few weeks.” He calls out to block out the dark train of thoughts that are starting to find their way out the front of his mind.

Lori is close to giving birth and they need a place to stay; a place to give birth and a place to let the baby grow. Hopefully something permanent. 

They had tried a variety of options; houses- which didn’t last long since a herd always found their way past, a storage container- which did work for a bit during the winter, but it wouldn’t be good enough long term especially since they all shared a single unit, and they needed a break from each other. Even knowing that staying close would keep them alive, they couldn’t help but yearn for some alone time. 

Who wouldn’t desire some peace and quiet after eight months of constantly being surrounded by the same people?

Daryl comes to a stop in front of Rick, his body turns to look through a break in the large bushes. “That’s damn a shame.” He calls as his eyes dance over the sight before him.

A prison with its yard infested with walkers. The walkers are slowly stumbling around the yard, all dressed in the prison-issued jumpsuit with white wife-beater tanks. With quick darting eyes, Rick looks over the fences, the guard towers, and even the buildings behind the grand green yard. A shuddering breath enters Rick’s lungs, “It’s perfect.” 

A prison, a visibly intact prison, gets bigger as the closer the group moves towards it on foot. Everyone is tightly gathering as Rick goes to the wired fence that stands thirty feet tall with barbed wire lining the top. Rick snaps the wires apart with a pair of loppers that slice through the metal with ease. “Watch the backside!” Rick calls out as he grasps at the sharp edges of the fence and pulls them back so the group can file their way inside. 

Lori calls back in turn as her hand dances underneath her pregnant belly. A few straggling walkers come towards them, but they’ll be too late.

There are two standing fence walls, the outer fence that they had cut through and the inner that creates the yard and the alley they stand in now for guards. With everyone in the safety of the alley, Glenn and Daryl lace strong plastic rope through the loops of wire as though stitching the material back together, with a final snap of a carabiner the hole is closed, and the group gathers next to Rick.

“It’s perfect,” Rick calls, as the walkers inside the prison yard stumble forward and slam against the fence that bounces them backward. The walkers can’t get them, from the yard or from outside- if they can control how many gather up, the fence will hold for a long time. “If we can shut that gate- prevent more from filling the yard, we can pick off these walkers. We’ll take the field by tonight.” Rick calls out.

Eyes darting over the yard, everyone takes note of Rick’s words. A large sliding wired gate is open between the concrete yard and the grass yard, closing it will block off the yard; the only problem is there are at least fifty walkers in the yard… with more filtering in. Closing it would be suicide.

Rick begins walking, taking in the integrity of the fence and watchtowers before reaching the large gate of the yard. The gate is large enough to let cars safely through and in the yard is an overturned bus, as though they tried to use it to block off the gate. The prison must’ve fallen early.

“So how do we shut the gate?” Hershel questions Rick as the groaning walkers start to bang against the fence from the yard.

Glenn digs through his bag pulling out two carabiners tied together with rope, “I’ll do it. You guys cover me.”

“No. Suicide run.” Maggie sternly shoots back.

“I’m the fastest.”

Rick shakes his head, “No. You, Maggie, and Beth draw as many as you can over there,” He tells Glenn with a point of his finger to a small stretch of fence filling up with some walkers, “pop them through the fence.” The trio nods and darts off with blades in hand after Glenn hands the carabiners over. “Daryl, go back to the other tower.” Daryl nods and leaves towards the third tower. “Carol, you’ve become a pretty good shot, take your time, we don’t have a lot of ammo to waste.” With a nod, she and T-Dog dart off to the second tower. “Hershel, you and Carl, take this tower.” They climb the stairs to their own tower. “I’ll run for the gate.” He says mostly to himself. 

With a turn, Rick meets the eyes of Bella and Lori staring at him: Lori’s eyes are soft in concern, gratefulness, and motivation for him… and Bella’s are filled with hatred. Taking a step forward, Lori backs up to open the gate for Rick as shouts start to sound out, the trio calling for the walker’s attention. Rick gives a final stern look at Bella, ‘If you try anything, I will not hesitate’ look before turning back to Lori. 

A sharp nod sends Lori into pulling the gate open before snapping it closed and locked once Rick slips his way through. Rick darts around the walkers in the yard as he follows his way up the dirt path toward the open gate. 

Bang!

Bang! Bang!

Swish!

Walkers fall to the ground as shots ring out, Daryl’s arrows fly with expert precision into the heads of walkers who get too close to Rick.

With a strong surge of adrenaline, Rick grasps the gate and pulls it close. The groan of a walker fast approaching forces Rick’s head up with his foot following close behind. A strong grunt escapes his lips as he kicks the walker back into the cement yard. The loud metal-on-metal snap sounds through the air as Rick latches the gate closed.

“He did it!”

Jumping backward with a turn, Rick looks towards the watchtower to his right and starts forward, his blade drawn in one hand and his gun in the other. With a stab and a few shots, Rick finds his way into the tower and climbs his way to the top.

“Light it up!” Daryl calls out to everyone with a twirl of his finger. Emerging from the tower Rick now holds a rifle in his hand and cocks it back. Everyone fires out shots, clearing the dead from the yard and letting their brains stain the dirt. 

As the last walker falls, the group can’t stop the cheers that erupt from their chests as they flood into the field.

“Fantastic!” Carol cheers out and grasps Lori’s hand. “You okay?”

Lori smiles brightly and closes the gate once everyone has made it through, “I haven’t felt this good in weeks.” She tells her honestly as they make their way up to the center of the field where Rick stands with a grin. 

“Oh! Oh, oh! We haven’t had this much space since we left the farm!” Carol cries as she spins gently in excitement.

Everyone is vibrating with excitement as they gather up and ensure the walkers are really down. Well… almost everyone is vibrating with excitement- Bella drops harshly against the turned-over bus, her back sinking to the ground slowly as she stares at the group. 

All so happy, the voice whispers into her mind, If only-

A harsh kick sends a light pain up her calf, the action more surprising than painful, “Come on. Need wood for the fire.” Daryl calls with his crossbow over his shoulder. The night was coming and there were no signs of wood in the yard. With another kick, “Ya’ hear me?” Daryl calls before reaching down and dragging the girl to her feet by the loose shirt on her torso.

The night the farm fell, and Bella almost took a chunk out of Daryl’s forearm was the start of a relationship that surprised most. The girl had nearly ripped apart his arm and killed Rick, but the sheriff wouldn’t leave the kid behind, so Daryl decided to look over the girl. Watching her every move and seemingly reading her thoughts, he was the reason all of her attempts at killing Rick were failures.

So here she is, trailing behind Daryl with little to no energy in her limbs as Daryl carries firewood to the trunk of his car. He throws a stash of squirrels into the back and begins the drive back to the farm, only a few minutes away.

The sky darkens quickly as they begin the fire, Bella sitting motionless in the grass as others drop around the warmth of the flames and the lovely stench of cooking food that filters into their noses. 

Tearing into pieces of food, everyone except Daryl and Rick eats the squirrel dinner. Rick circles the fence of the yard, searching for any problems and Daryl stands guard atop the turned-over bus. 

“Mmmm… Just like mom used to make.” Glenn groans, ripping into a cooked leg. Others groan in agreement as their stomachs get filled with tender squirrel meat. Glenn glances over to Bella, the girl just stares into the flames and smoke. The man gathers up a plate of food and pushes it in her direction, but she merely shakes her head without a care. 

How the girl’s stomach hadn't shriveled up and consumed itself was a mystery to them. However, Glenn didn’t take no for an answer and placed the plate down next to her.

As though she was repulsed by the food her sickly hand grabs the plate and hands it off to Carl who sits comfortably next to his mother. The young man had been growing a shorter fuss in the past months with his mother at the center. The boy grabs at the dish, knowing Bella would hold her arm out until he took it no matter how long that was, and holds it to Lori, she grasps at another piece and eats it, Carl following her lead.

“Tomorrow, we’ll put all the bodies together. We want to keep them away from that water.” T-Dog calls out into the crackling fire, “Now if we can dig a canal under the fence, we’ll- uh- have plenty of fresh water.” His plate is cleared of meat, and he tosses the bones into the fire.

Hershel nods in agreement, his white hair long on his head and his face, he’s worn by the constant travel, but he looks younger, livelier than before. It’s interesting how a constant fight for survival can make someone look good. “If the soil is good, we could plant some seed, grow some tomatoes, cucumbers, soybeans,” He lets his words drift off with a look towards Rick, the sheriff circling the fence once more in the moonlight, “That’s his third time around. If there was any part of it compromised, he’d have found it by now.”

No one responds. What would they say? Rick was making sure they were all safe, he could look as many times as he needed.

The group goes quiet as Carol climbs to her feet with a plate of food for Daryl. As she disappears the group relaxes into the grass, it’s tall enough to create a soft cushion on the dirt for their sore backs. Hershel calls for Beth to sing, the girl denying her father for a moment before giving in.

Bella is motionless as Beth sings, unlike the others who rock side to side ever so gently until Rick sits next to Lori. The girl’s head snaps to his figure, tracking his movements as he pushes the extra meat back towards Lori and tries to give it to her. The woman however doesn’t take no for an answer, taking a small piece once Rick has taken one; the couple is satisfied.

The singing dies out and Rick ignores Bella as he usually does, Daryl and Carol sitting down, “Better all turn in.” Rick calls out into the group as they look over to him. “I’ll take watch over there,” He nods to a tower, “We’ve got a big day tomorrow.” Rick stands and dusts off his pants.

“What do you mean?” Glenn questions the man, his spine going straight.

He sighs as he turns back to the confused faces around the fire, “Look, I know we’re all exhausted. This was a great win.” He compliments, “But we gotta push just a little bit more. Most of the walkers are dressed as guards or prisoners, looks like this place fell pretty early. Could mean the supplies may be intact.” The group nods in an understanding of his words but is still concerned about the plan, “They’ll have an infirmary, a commissary-”

“An armory?” Daryl questions.

Rick nods, “That would be outside the prison itself, but not too far away. Warden’s offices would have info on the location.” His face turns excited, “Weapons, food, medicine, this place could be a gold mine!”

“We’re dangerously low on ammo,” Hershel calls, trampling on Rick’s plan. “We’ll run out before we make a dent.” The older man has continued his way of being a voice of reason to Rick and the group. And the sheriff appreciated Hershel’s words.

But this was not something he’d wait on, “That’s why we gotta go in there. Hand to hand.” The fire crackles loudly, “After all we’ve been through, we can handle it, I know it. These assholes don’t stand a chance.” Rick leaves the group to themselves as he goes to take watch, Lori follows behind.

In the silence, everyone gathers together to prepare to sleep. It’s been two days of sleeping in cars and it was not a comfortable situation, and the grass was like sleeping on a cloud.

Bella watches as blankets are pulled and bodies lay down for the night. Standing up, she moves a slight distance from the group to lie on the small grass hill, eyes dancing over the bright stars in the sky. 

She wishes sometimes she still had her sketchbook to capture the beauty of the night sky… but she knows she never could.

“ Why do that when you have other things to do? ” The voice whispers out next to her. Her body goes cold at the voice, the voice that sounds like her daddy, the voice she’s known since she was born.

Bella squeezes her eyes tight for a moment, light bursting behind her eyelids, before letting them fall open again.

“ You should’ve killed him, sweetheart. ” Shane’s voice drifts into her ears from her right side.

Tensely she turns her head to meet the blurred vision of her daddy lying alongside her, staring into the sky just like her.

Sucking in a deep breath, Bella moves her eyes back to the stars, “I need to catch him off guard. I can’t kill him any other way.” She whispers into the air. 

This isn’t the first time her daddy has shown up, but it’s usually never like this with the group so close by. “ You don’t want to kill him. ” He calls in accusation, turning onto his side to look down at the girl.

“I want to, I do, daddy.” She stresses her eyes glued to the sky, “But he’s too strong- I need it to be a surprise.” Her hands grip the grass and dirt unknowingly.

“ My little princess… if you want him dead, he’d be dead. ”

“I tried-”

“ My daughter would avenge me. ” Shane interrupts.

“I’m trying… it’s all I’ve done since you left-”

“ Yet here you are, ” He stops her leaning close to her ear, Bella can swear she feels his breath on her skin, “ laying in a field as he sits a stone's throw away. You could kill him now. ”

Bella takes a quick glance at her daddy before snapping her head back to its place, “I can’t. Mr. Daryl is still awake.”

“ Then kill Daryl first. He’ll never see it coming. ”

He always tells her to kill him, to kill Daryl… “Mr. Grimes killed you- not Mr. Daryl.” She explains once more to her dead daddy. Daryl might have been getting in her way of killing Rick, but she can’t bring herself to kill him too, something in her won’t let it happen. 

“ He stands in your way of killing Rick. His death wouldn’t mean anything. ” He sings. Shane’s face goes cold as he sees Bella barely move, not even a twitch of the eye. “ You can’t do it. ” His voice goes low, “ You’re not my daughter… My daughter is strong. ”

“I am strong.”

“ No, you’re not. ” His breath tickles her skin once more, “ You’re weak. You’ve always been weak. ” The distorted voice whispers into her ear before her eyes close.

Chapter Text

“Ready?” Hershel questions as he grips at the wired fence. Rick, Daryl, T-Dog, Glenn, and Maggie all grip blades tightly in their hands, preparing to fight the walkers that are slowly getting closer to the gate.

Rick looks at the man and gives him a strong nod. Metal-on-metal sounds out as the gate is pulled and quickly closed once the group of five slip their way inside.

They need to clear out the secondary yard of the prison, close the gate at the back of it so they can get inside and, hopefully, make a safe place to live. The early morning found the group conversing on the plan, standing far away from the fence to not draw many walkers towards it. And now is the time for the plan.

“Come here!” Lori shouts out, drawing walkers to the fence. The rest of the group stands behind the fence staring at the group as they stab at the walkers that approach them, all back to back in a tight formation. Some walkers stumble over, the group behind the fence closer than the group inside. The walkers that get close enough get a blade in their head, their bodies thumping to the group in rhythm with the ones farther in the yard.

Inside the courtyard, Maggie slashes at a walker's head, clearing a path through the center of the decaying head. Blood splatters across the ground and T-Dog darts away from the group.

“T!” Rick shouts at the man as he grabs at a hard plastic shield with the letters ‘SWAT’ fading across. Backstepping, T-Dog lifts the shield and slams it against a walker, taking it to the ground for Maggie to stab. 

Glenn grasps at the back of her shirt to pull her back into the circle of living bodies, the group together once more. The walkers get picked off easily by both groups and the front of the courtyard is now empty. 

“Almost there.” Rick calls out as they move to hug the tall brick wall of the prison and step under the small sky bridge above their heads. 

The group steps carefully behind Rick who leads them farther back into the shadows of the building. The sheriff moves to pass a metal door that lays slightly ajar. With no visible threat inside, he moves past to the end of the brick building where slight groans sound out. 

A single raised hand stops the group in their place, all of them readjusting the grip on their blades. Peaking around the wall, Rick comes to face another wired fence with a group of walkers milling inside. 

He whips his sight away and looks towards the other, “Two, maybe, three dozen walkers,” He whispers to them, “We need to get the gate closed. Section off the yard.” Daryl nods in understanding and pulls another set of carabiners from his waist. 

Daryl and Rick move forward, Glenn, Maggie, and T-Dog moving to follow but the metal door pulls open. 

“Shit!” Glenn and Rick call out in unison. Glenn for the sight of the SWAT armored walker in front of his face and Rick for the two others that come from behind a large dumpster in the back corner of the yard at least 40 feet away.

Daryl brings his cross to his face and pulls the trigger, the arrow dancing off of the plastic mask the walker wears.

“Daryl!” Rick shouts as he pushes a walker to the ground and barrels towards the gate as the group falls into a frenzy.

The redneck darts forward and sends a kick to a walker that stands in the way of the gate closing, the body launching backwards and tumbling the other corpses to the ground like bowling pins. 

As Rick snaps the gate closed and Daryl hooks it, Maggie fits harshly at the armored walker, the men of the group fighting ones of their own. The walker takes the hits without care, like they usually do. Without any other plan, Maggie darts forward grasping at the walker in a type of hug, before pulling the helmet back and driving her blade underneath the mask, thru the corpse's chin.

Maggie pulls away harshly, the body falling to the ground. Spinning to the guys with a bright smile plastered across her face as blood seeps into her dirty white tank top, Maggie calls out, “See that?”

They respond by following her lead and driving their blades into the other two armored walkers, their bodies falling to the ground.

With the last two bodies on the ground, the group takes a deep breath, T-Dog slamming the metal door closed to stop any other walkers from getting into the yard. They all huff harshly, the sun beating harshly onto their heads. 

“Looks secure.” Glenn calls out as he looks around. 

Daryl shakes his head, “Not from the look of that courtyard over there.” He points, “And that’s a civilian.” Everyone looks down at the bodies at their feet. Many of them are inmates, dressed in the prison uniforms or as officers but some are dressed in regular clothing, the few bodies standing out against the similarly dressed ones.

T-Dog sighs as he leans against a cement column holding the sky bridge in the air. “So the interior could be overrun by walkers from outside the prison.”

Rick nods alongside Daryl as their eyes dart around. “Well, if there’s walls, then, what are we gonna do? We can’t rebuild this whole place.” Glenn questions Rick.

And he looks towards the fence where the rest of the group stands, his eyes drifting over Carl longer than the rest, “We can’t risk a blind spot.” He says, “We have to push in.” Rick spins his machete in his hand and the others give their nods of approval, tailing behind the man as he moves.

They move towards the staircase with more metal fence surrounding it with a metal door. Daryl opens it first, letting Rick climb the stairs first. Gathering together at the thick metal door that will lead them inside the prison, Daryl grabs at the handle waiting for a nod.

Everyone prepares themselves and Rick nods, Daryl pushing the door opening instantly. The unused metal hinges scream as the door opens and Daryl darts in first, crossbow and flashlight in the air and scanning the open area for threats. 

The rest file into the open area; a cell block. An empty cell block with its gate doors closed.

Daryl moves forward towards a set of stairs and follows them, coming to a perch that overlooks the ‘living’ area of the cell block- a place for eating and socializing, with a single corpse inside; the man died from what seems to be a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head. 

Eyes dancing around the small area, Daryl spots two sets of keys in their comical fashion; an iron ring with multiple large keys on the ring. Moving to the bottom of the stairs, Daryl's hands a set over to Rick, who moves to a gate with a sign above. ‘Cell Block C’.

It takes two tries to find the correct key to open the gate. And the search begins, everyone moving carefully past cells. Most of them are empty- the ones that aren’t either have a dead body inside or are locked with a walker groaning from inside.

They kill the walkers easily, Glenn and Maggie darting outside to let the rest of the group inside.

As they enter with their little belongings, T-Dog and Daryl drop a body from the second level of the cell block.

“What do you think?” Rick questions as Glenn lugs in an arm full of duffel bags.

He gives a smile and tosses the weight off his shoulder. “Home sweet home.”

Rick gives him a nod at his tone- this was what they all need, security and a place of their own… but living in a prison would be difficult: it’s dark, cold and suffocating. “For the time being.” Rick returns.

Lori walks forward with a few lighter bags, “It’s secure?” She questions her husband.

Rick gives her a smile, “This cell block is.”

Everyone gathers close as they finish dropping the rest of their things to the ground. “What about the rest of the prison?” Hershel questions. 

“In the morning, we’ll find the cafeteria, and the infirmary.” Rick tells them. An unheard sigh of relief is heard through the group; they get to sleep the night before diving deeper into the prison.

Beth stands next to her dad, “We sleep in the cells?”

The sheriff nods his head, “I found the keys on some guards. Daryl has a set too.” He tells them.

“I ain’t sleeping in no cage.” Daryl gruffs out. “I’ll take the perch.” He calls out as he grabs at his duffle bag and Bella’s small bag next to it.

“He’s so close…” Shane’s voice calls out to Bella as she listens to the group from the opening of cell 3- more like stares through the group at Rick, “You could do it now.”

Daryl throws her bag over her shoulder and into the cell, the motion snapping her out of her death gaze, “Lil’ killer, let’s go. Gotta get these bodies out.” He tells her. She looks around at the whole group looking towards her with a glint in their eyes that she’s seen before. Daryl grabs at her boney shoulder to lead her away, “I ain’t got all day.” He pulls her into the main room of the cell block, throwing his duffle at the bottom of the stairs leading to his perch.

The girl drags her feet behind the man as he holsters his crossbow onto his back and begins pulling bodies into the open yard where the other bodies lay. T-Dog helps Daryl, the young girl merely standing to the side as they work.

Bella couldn’t help even if she wanted to, which she doesn’t, especially since everyone in the group has told her to leave Rick alone. He killed her daddy and they want her to forgive him. What a stupid idea.

With the bodies outside, T-Dog goes back inside leaving Daryl and Bella alone in the midday sun, “Got some balls on ya’... to keep trying like that.” He speaks into the air. He knows Bella heard him even though she doesn’t respond.  “Ain’t gonna say nothing?” He still asks her. Turning his head, he spots her staring at him from the top of a three tier metal bench. Her gaze is dull. “Your daddy talking to ya’?” He asks as he walks slowly over to her. Bella doesn’t open her mouth to respond, she doesn’t even move a muscle, she merely watches Daryl like a statue. A new normal for her whenever anyone tries to converse with her, she rarely speaks these days. But he can see it in her eyes, the surprise at him knowing she’s been ‘talking’ with her dead dad. Daryl gives her a minute of silence, “Ya know he’s not real, right? And Carl… he’d hate you if you kill his daddy.”

Bella finally reacts, a small smile dancing on the corner of her mouth, “We’ll see.” Standing from the bench, she turns and walks back towards the cell block.

Chapter Text

The new day sun can be seen through the thin windows of the cell block. Even with the doors locked and closed, and Daryl staying on watch in the perch, it was still a night full of twisting and turning.

Bella lays in her cell on the dirty bottom bunk, her eyes staring at the underside of the bunk above her. 

She’s all alone in her cell. 

Even with the tension between them she thinks Carl wanted to room with her, he tried talking to her but a hand to his shoulder from Lori pushed him to the next. 

She hates it; Carl is her friend. But Rick needs to pay for what he did.

Officer Friendly shouldn’t have killed her daddy… she didn’t want Rick to die either, before she knew what he did… Rick should’ve done more to save them both.

“But he’s weak.” Shane’s voice calls from the dark corner of the six by eight cement room. 

Bella slowly draws her head to face the noise, but nothing stands in the shadows. The young girl can’t help but shudder in her skin.

I’m going crazy , she thinks. What kind of person has her dead daddy talking to her? She hates herself for thinking that- her daddy was everything she knew, but this isn’t her daddy… no matter how badly she wants it to be.

“ I told you I’d never leave you, ” Shane calls from underneath her head. “ I’ll always be with you. ” She can feel the words on her ear.

Jumping from the bunk Bella swings the metal bar door open and backs into the open air of the cell block, the stale dust hitting her lungs as she breathes harshly, her eyes drawn to her cell in fear. 

Her daddy was starting to scare her. Why is he acting like this? He never did before.

“Lil’ Killer?” Daryl’s voice calls out. Bella’s head snaps quickly over to the redneck that approaches quickly to stare into the cell, his knife drawn from his waistband. “What happened?”

“Nothing,” She replies quickly, not meeting Daryl’s eye.

He doesn't believe the girl, but he sheaths his knife back into its place. “Come on then,” Bella looks at him. “Found some stuff, need help lugging it in. And you ain’t doin’ nothing.” Daryl is always finding a way to keep her occupied as though that will stop her from planning her next attack. 

“ Perhaps you should wait this time, ” Shane says into the air as Bella walks side-by-side with Daryl down a short hallway to a room that reads ‘Officers Only’. “ Let him think you’ve given up, then attack when his guard is down? ” He suggests, his figure leaning against the door jam that she passes through without a look in his direction.

He won’t let his guard down. She thinks in her head. No matter what happens, he won’t ever trust her; and he shouldn’t . 

She wouldn’t.

Dragging the few supplies they found in the small room, Bella swings the bag onto the tabletop, the metal clanging at the impact.

“Not bad.” Daryl calls, separating the goods they’ve found. 

The table is filled with all types of supplies; “Flashbangs, CS Triple-Chasers, stun guns, smoke bombs...” Rick lists out the smaller things on the table. “Not sure how they’d work on walkers, but we’ll take them.” 

T-Dog and Glenn gather around the table too, dropping some slimy armor onto the tabletop. Daryl reaches over and picks up a helmet, goop slipping out of it and pooling on the table thickly, “I ain’t wearing this shit.” He spits, tossing the helmet back down. 

T-Dog and Glenn had pulled the armor off the dead walkers outside, the dead flesh having decayed within the armor under the Georgia sun.

Tossing some gloves back and forth in his hands T-Dog offers, “We could boil them.”

Daryl huffs at the suggestion, “Ain’t enough firewood in a whole forest, no!” Bella gives a slightly raised eyebrow at Daryl. The man barely showered or cleaned the dirt off his skin, but some dirty armor was too much? “Besides, we’ve made it this far without them, right?” He calls as the rest of the group files in.

Rick, Daryl, Glenn, T-Dog, Maggie, and Hershel plan on entering deeper into the prison to clear it out. Hoping to find the infirmary and cafeteria… even just a map of the prison would be helpful.

Slipping weapons and small pieces of armor onto their bodies, the group prepares themselves. Carl moves towards the table, his interested hands grabbing at a dusty, but clean, helmet, slipping it over his head with a smile; his boyish wonder urging him to do so.

Turning his head he finds Bella’s gaze. She watches him simply and he can’t help the smile that dances across his face as he shows off the helmet. The girl gives a small twitch of her mouth but as quickly as he puts it on, Rick reaches to take it off. “You won’t need that; I need you to stay put.” He drops the helmet back on the table.

“You’re kidding!” Carl questions bewildered.

Rick grabs his shoulder seriously, looking down at his son. “We don’t know what’s in there.” Carl listens intently, “If something goes wrong, you could be the last man standing. I need you to handle things here.” Rick’s eyes dance to the side where Bella stands, and Carl catches the movement.

His dad is trusting Carl to protect the rest of the group, “Sure.” Carl says without any fight, ready to take the responsibility.

Rick ruffles Carl’s hair and drops a quick kiss to the boy temple. “Great, let’s go.” He gives a sharp look to the young girl standing at the side before turning away.

Everyone gathers at the door at the back of the main room, Carl unlocks the gate. Pulling it open, the group disappears into the darkness, the only light coming from flashlights in their hands.

Carl snaps the door closed as they disappear. And the remaining group filters back into the cells.

Inside the cell block, Lori, Beth, and Carol begin tending to the few chores they have. Carl finds himself a seat in the main room with his gun drawn next to his thigh, watching the doors for any sign of movement or noise. 

“ He looks like his dad, ” Shane's voice draws in the open room. “ He’ll hate you one day too… just like Rick. ”

“Shut up,” Bella growls out harshly.

Carl perks up, “What?”

Bella freezes and darts a look to her friend before her feet take her towards the exit door. Carl calls her name, and she thinks she responds with something, but she doesn’t notice as the bright Georgia sun slams into her eyes. 

The air is so bright as she lets the door slam behind her that she can see spots in her vision as she tumbles out of the caged in stairs. 

Why can’t you just leave me alone? Bella questions into her head as she rubs harshly into her eyes. Looking up she sees the bodies that lay on the ground, the old decaying blood staining the hard ground and flaking in the heat.

Bella coughs at the sight, a slight gag forming in her throat. I’ve never had a problem with this…

“ Perhaps it’s because you’re weak? ” Her daddy offers her. The wind blowing around her and causing goosebumps to dance to life on her exposed skin.

“I’m not the weak one,” She grumbles out and begins to walk away from the voice at her back, towards the green yard. 

“ But you are, ” Shane calls out from his place on the metal bench, his face distorted and bloody like the night he died. “ You can’t kill Rick, hell… I don’t think you even want to. ” Bella stops in her pursuit and stares at him.

“ Of course I do. But- ” She begins to insist. Why does he think she doesn't want to kill Rick? She’s tried so many times, tried so many things. She can only do so much.

If he never left, this wouldn’t even be a problem. They could be together with Carl and Lori… and Rick. But no, Shane couldn’t handle it and he got himself killed.

Daddy got himself killed because he was impatient.

“ There is no but! ” He screams standing up, “ The longer he lives, the stronger he gets! ” He begins approaching, no shadow following his body.

“So will I!” 

He laughs, looking down with a nasty look across his face, “ You, strong? ” A laugh huffs out of his mouth, a small trail of blood escaping from his lips, “ That’s funny, princess. ”

“Don’t call me that!” Bella screams at him, “You’re not even my real daddy…” She turns around and takes anxious steps in a circle.

And he follows, circling her as she moves, “ Maybe… maybe not your blood and flesh daddy, ” Bella snaps her head over to him. “ But I am everything you know. Isn’t that right? ” And she can’t help but freeze. “ Nothing? Nothing to say? ”

“You’re not real… I’m going insane…”

Shane bends down slightly, “ Enough! Whining! Bella! ” He screams and she flinches away from the sound. Real or not, it still hurts to have her daddy scream at her. “ I won’t let my daughter be weak! ” He paces in front of her like a predator about to attack. “ So this is what you’re gonna do- ”

“I’m not doing anything you say.” Bella interrupts. She needs to stop listening. If her daddy isn’t real then this is just her mind… she needs to control herself. She can’t follow in her daddy’s footsteps, or she’ll end up just like him.

Shane stops like he can hear her thoughts… he can hear her thoughts. A crude smile craves itself into her daddy’s face, an unnatural smile not made for his face. “ Cause Carl’s in there? And your baby sibling?... ” He draws out, eyes going wide.

The sight forces a shiver down her spine. She can’t turn away, can’t run away from herself. “Carl will be mad if I kill his daddy.” She insists as strongly as she can, even though the disfigured sight of her daddy makes her knees want to buckle.

“What about me? Don’t you want to avenge me?”

“Yes, daddy, I do but-” Tears start to fall without her permission. She wants to stop them; stop the tears, stop the tension between her and Carl… stop everything. 

She just wants it to stop.

“ It’s never going to stop! ” He screams at her. Stepping closer to stand only a few feet away. “ What reason could you have?! ” He questions her reluctance.

Bella huffs a choked back cry and takes a miniscule step forward. “He’s all I have!” She cries out loudly. The force of the truth pushing her daddy back, his sharp stance dulling. “Carl is the only reason I’m still here! You left me!” She accuses with a pointed finger. 

It’s Carl that keeps her alive. It’s Carl that stopped her from becoming an animal like her daddy became at times.

If he wasn’t here, Bella wouldn’t be either. She’d have been left on the side of the road to die like the group thought of one night; it was Carl that got Rick to say no. It was Carl, regardless how snippy he’s grown with her, that stopped Bella from being left behind.

“ I died for you… ” Shane states softly.

The softness of those words sends a flare of fire through her body. Stomping to the rest of the way forward Bella looks up at her daddy, “You died because you loved Lori more than me!” Shane’s face stays neutral. “It’s your fault! You’re the weak one! You. Left. Me!” She screams.

And it pulls off her chest like a weight she didn’t know was there.

It’s all her daddy’s fault.

He couldn’t control himself. He couldn’t stop himself from lusting and obsessing over someone that didn’t do the same for him. It’s his fault for letting Randall out. 

It’s his fault for pushing Rick. His fault for dying.

“ It’s Rick’s fault. ” 

“Rick killed you,” She replies tearfully. “And it’s your fault.”

“ So? ” He questions with a step forward, so close he has to drop his chin to his chest to look down at her. “ You won’t avenge me? ” The question is pained.

And Bella pauses for a moment staring at her daddy’s dull dead eyes, “Of course I will,” She promises softly as raised voices sound from inside the cell block; blood curdling screams and cries followed by silence…

And then the raised voices of people she doesn’t know.

Chapter Text

With slow and careful steps Bella slips her way inside the first door of the cell block: none of the men, new or known, notice her. 

“It’s far enough.” Daryl calls out as a group of men dressed in prison jumpsuits slip their way inside the cell block. The redneck has his knee propped up on a round table with his crossbow trained on the men.

Bella looks around at the scene quietly. Daddy always said criminals are dangerous . 

“Cell block C,” The head of the little prison gang calls, his jumpsuit is tied at his waist, showing off his white tank and the tattoos that cover his torso. “Cell four, that’s mine, gringo. Let me in.” He demands with a Spanish accent.

And Daryl doesn’t flatter, not in the face of the group of men, not while he’s all alone. “Today’s your lucky day, fellas,” He calls, finger still pointedly on the trigger of his weapon. “You’ve been pardoned by the state of Georgia, you’re free to go.”

But the main prisoner doesn’t care. “What you got going on in there?” He tries peeking his head, but Daryl stands up straight. 

The other prisoners seem anxious to leave, or just anxious… but not this main one. Bella can’t help but think he’s looking for a fight. 

But what was it he said? Something happened… there’s blood on the floor going to the cell block.

Bella’s heart falters, was it Mr. Grimes? Did he get bit? Her heart pounds in her chest. He can’t get bit; if he got bit, I can’t kill him. I need to kill him. It has to be me. She cries in her head, her eyes stuck on the blood trail on the ground.

“Ain’t none of your concern.” Daryl calls.

And Bella’s attention is stolen as the prisoner pulls a small gun from his waistband. The small revolver is almost pathetic in the face of Daryl. Even if the redneck didn’t have his crossbow, he was more intimidating than the whole group of prisoners. “Don’t be telling me what’s my concern!” The prisoner demands, gun pointing at Daryl.

Daryl merely adjusts his stance, not backing down from the prisoner. But another prisoner, a large black man almost 7 feet tall, steps forward to stand at the first prisoner’s side. “Chill, man. Dude’s leg is messed up.” He says, his voice soft compared to his stature. “Besides, we’re free now! Why are we still in here?”

“Man’s got a point.”

A second large black man, smaller than the first, said, “Yeah, and I gotta check on my old lady.” He tells them, trying to pull the first’s attention away.

The first doesn’t care and doesn’t back down, “Group of civilians breaking into a prison you’ve got no business being in, got me thinking there ain’t no place for us to go!” He spits, his arm still raised with his weapon in his grasp. 

He holds it like a criminal too. Bella thinks. The man holds it like it’s a toy, like he is too good to hold it; it's lazy. And pathetic. 

“Why don’t you go find out?”

The only white man in the group steps forward, “Maybe we’ll just be going now.” He tries breaking the sharp tension in the air. The prisoner looks like a scientist in an old movie with his white pointy beard and accented voice.

The first turns his head sharply, “Hey, we ain’t leaving!” He commands as though he controls all of them.

And the prisoner takes a miniscule step forward before T-Dog darts out from the cell block, his own gun raised high at the group, “You ain’t coming here either!”

“Hey, this is my house, my rules, I go where I damn well please!” The Spanish prisoner shouts, gun waving in the air.

Bella’s heart pounds in her chest as she watches the exchange, as though she was in the center. She doesn’t trust these prisoners, at least not the one with the gun… He’s unhinged.

Daryl circles out from the back of the table, crossbow not wavering one bit. “There ain’t nothing for you here, why don’t you go back to your own sandbox?”

The prisoner goes to speak but Rick darts out from the cell, Carl swings the door closed behind him, the key ring in his hand. “Hey, hey, hey! Everyone relax, there’s no need for this,” He calls out, trying to defuse the tension and it works for a mere moment; both sides are quiet in the presence of the sheriff. 

Bella watches with rapt attention, Mr. Grimes is alive… that means someone else got hurt. 

“How many of you in there?” The prisoner questions.

And Bella can’t stop her mouth from opening, “Too many for you to handle.” She calls out, her voice dripping in sass.

Both groups snap their heads in her direction, and she pulls herself from the shadows, stepping down the stone stairs and moving towards Daryl’s side.

The first black man jumps in his skin, hand swinging to his chest at her words. “Holy shit! Creepy little girl came outta nowhere!” He calls out. Daryl keeps his weapon on the prisoners, but the prisoner couldn’t help his attention getting pulled to the young girl.

She drifts slowly towards Daryl, walking around the tables. “Language,” she says simply. And the first prisoner follows her with his weapon. It makes her heart pound, but she won’t let the pathetic man see it. 

“I know this little bitch ain’t telling Big Tiny what to do!” The Spanish prisoner sits.

Rick, Daryl, and T-Dog move close towards the girl as she slips behind Daryl, the trio of men trying to guard her from the prisoner’s gazes. “Best not test her patience,” Daryl tells them seriously, “the Lil’ Killer doesn’t have much of one.”

Bella can’t help the small sneer and smirk that forms on her face at Daryl’s words.

Of course, Rick has to ruin it though, “Go help Glenn. Now!” He commands her. And the clicking of the lock makes her move, the site of Glenn and Carl standing together. 

At least it wasn’t Glenn either.

Darting inside, Bella ignores the conversation that continues inside the main room of the cell block. She follows the blood trail into the first cell of the block. A short peek inside makes her eyes go wide.

Carol and Lori are bent over Hershel's unresponsive body: Carol’s hands pushed up hard against the doctor’s leg… more like the stump where his leg is supposed to be. “What happened?” Bella questions softly to Glenn who stands at her back right, Carl standing on her other side. 

“He got bit,” Glenn explains and his eyes dance over to Maggie and Beth who cling at each other inside the cell. “Rick cut it off.” Bella’s eyes jump to Glenn’s face before drifting back down to the man.

It hurt.

It hurts to see the older man laying unmoving on the bed. It hurts to know that he may still die or turn even after having his foot cut off.

“ Another reason Rick needs to die… he just keeps killing people. ” Shane’s voice calls from the shadows of the cell block. 

Bella ignores it.

And she ignores Rick as he calls Glenn over to the gate, ignores whatever they talk about and the sound of the men moving out of the cell block.

She merely stares at Hershel and Carol, the woman tending to the man with care and urgency. No one in the group has the experience or knowledge of medicine like Hershel and it is obvious as she stares inside the cell.

“We need supplies,” Carol calls out into the silence, “He’s bleeding straight through these towels.” She pulls the damp red blood-soaked towel away from the stump, small bursts of blood pumping up into the air without the pressure of the towel. 

Lori sighs into the air as she puts two fingers to Hershel sweaty neck in search of a heartbeat. She gives a confirmation when she finds the slow beats under the pads of her fingers.

Bella tries thinking back to the small first aid lessons Hershel had taught the group and the things she had remembered from the mismatched books she had found on the road. “His leg needs to be higher, Ms. Carol.” She calls out to the short haired woman, “Over his heart.” Glenn darts away in search of pillows from the empty cells.

The Korean American man is back quickly, and he slides the pillows underneath the stump, the spurts of blood slowing down as Hershel's leg goes 60 degrees from the cell mattress. “Good job, Bella.” Lori compliments the girl with a strained smile.

Bella gives a little nod towards Maggie and Beth, They don’t need to know what it’s like to lose a dad too. The young girl thinks to herself as she watches the Greene daughters drop to the ground alongside their dad.

“ How sweet of you… caring about others, ” Shane’s disembodied voice calls, the words dripping in sass. 

The girl ignores it, she can’t talk to him here, I don’t even want to talk to him .

“ That’s not very nice, ” Her daddy drawls. “ I’m just trying to help. ”

Bella wants to pull her hair from her head, “You’re not helping.” She growls out loud.

“What?” Glenn questions the young girl. 

She snaps from her daze and looks up to see everyone staring at her. Her mouth gapes as she tries to find a response to Glenn’s question. 

But the sing-song voice of T-Dog gives her an escape. “Food’s here!” He sings as he trails into the cell block carrying two large cardboard boxes.

Carl holds the gate open for him and the others that trial inside the cell block, all carrying boxes and large cans of food. “What you got?” Carl questions excitedly.

T-Dog smiles at the boy, “Canned beef, canned corn, canned cans! There’s a lot more where this came from!” The man disappears inside Cell 7 dropping the food to the ground. 

It’s more food than any of them have seen in months. The few grocery stores they had come across were practically clean of everything, only scrapes of trash on the ground. Bella watches everyone carry their supply inside and the prisoners gather in the main room.

She watches them carefully as they gather at the far end from the door to the actual cell block. T-Dog moved to guard the opening of the cells, his presence stopping the prisoner from trying anything, if they were thinking of anything at all.

The young girl’s eyes dance over the prisoners as they sit about a metal table; the Spanish one- Thomas, according to T, whispers to the other prisoners. Two of them ignore him for the most part and the other two listen, especially a short black man that clings to Thomas’ side like a tic.

“ That Thomas piece of shit… ” Shane’s voice speaks over the mumbled conversation all around her. “ He’s got that same look you have when you look at Rick .” His voice draws out into the air like a challenge, like a taunt.

She hates the thought. Thomas shows up after being stuck inside a cafeteria with four other prisoners and now he wants to kill Rick…

That’s her kill. Not his. 

He doesn’t deserve it.

“Bella,” Rick’s voice calls out. She turns her head to look at the sheriff, a glare in her eye. “Come here.” He points to the ground farther into the cell block, away from the others near the front like he’s calling over a dog. And she listens to it, curiosity pulling her feet.

She moves over slowly to Rick and Daryl, the redneck sitting atop the metal staircase that leads to the upper level of the cell block, his crossbow resting against his leg.

No one else stands near them. Daryl gives the girl a serious look when she peeks at him. The look in the redneck's eyes makes her heart beat faster than before. 

“Pay attention, I’m only going to say this once,” Rick demands, forcing her eyes up to his face. His presence loams over her and she tries to stand tall against it. His hand reaches behind his back and comes forward with a blade in a sheath, not just any blade. It’s her daddy’s blade. 

The blade Rick killed Shane with.

Bella’s breath skips and her wide eyes jump between Rick and the blade. The sheriff hesitates for a fraction of a second as he hands it out towards the girl. She hadn’t held a real weapon since the farm fell, everyone made sure of that. 

Why is he giving it to me? She questions her mind, but she doesn’t really care. I can kill him right here- right now! Her hand raises towards the offered blade.

“ Not yet, sweetheart, ” Shane’s voice calls out to her.

Her fingertips are so close to the handle, but her chin is forced up in a tight grip between two fingers. 

Rick’s hand is tight on her chin forcing her eyes back to his face, the blade held back from her grasp. Bella freezes as she looks at the man; he has never been so… forceful.

His face is like stone as he looks down, “If you try anything, I will not hesitate. Do you understand? No more group… no more Carl. Nothing.” There is no room for argument. And Bella doesn’t want to. “Do. You. Understand?” He demands an answer by tightening his grip.

“Yes, Mr. Grimes.” She responds simply.

And Rick looks over her face for a moment before releasing her chin and handing the blade to the girl.

Bella’s hand shakes in anticipation as she grabs the blade, almost as though she expected Rick to attack her for it. Like it was all a test.

But she holds the blade in her grasp and Rick looks down at her. With a hard shallow, the young girl slips the blade into the back of her waistband underneath her shirt. 

A sign of peace.

“ For now. ”

Bella looks back at the sheriff once the blade is in its place and he gives her a motioning nod of his head to go back to Glenn, who watches over Hershel. Turning in her place she begins to walk but the sight of Thomas pacing in a poor attempt to peek into the cell block stops her.

“He wants to kill you, Mr. Grimes.” She tells him as she stares at T who demands Thomas go back into the corner, the prisoner going reluctantly. Rick walks over to stand beside her, dropping a glance down at her. Like she said something he was already thinking about. “Almost like how Randall wanted to kill you.” She pokes with a glare up to the man before walking towards Carl and Glenn. 

Daryl and Rick watch the young girl leave to stand besides the others.

“You really think that was a good idea?” Daryl questions as he throws the crossbow strap over his shoulder. 

Rick grits his teeth, “We’ll see.”

Chapter Text

Rick, Daryl, and T-Dog slip into the deep areas of the prison in search of another cell block. The sheriff had created a deal with the prisoners, he would lend them some weapons and help them clear a cell block, and in return the prisoners would give up half the food supply in the cafeteria and they would stay to themselves. 

But even though some of the prisoners were grateful- Oscar, the medium sized black man, Big Tiny, the largest man of the group, and Axel, the white man. The other two, Thomas and Andrew, were obviously up to something else. Even Lori could see it when she bid Rick goodbye.

With the trio of men deep in the prison alongside the prisoners, Carol drags Glenn outside the prison walls towards the green fields for her own reasons she keeps secret. Leaving Lori to watch over Hershel with Maggie and Beth milling around, close but not hovering over their father.

Hershel’s leg had seemed to clot finally. The bursts of blood stopped but the doctor was still deathly pale. His skin is covered with a gleam of sweat, it makes his blood pumping veins shine like neon lights under his skin.

“He’s going to need antibiotics, or something.” Lori comments as she dabs at Hershel’s forehead with a damp cloth.

Maggie sits at the foot of her dad’s bed, Carl and Bella looking in from the doorway. “We don’t have any.” The oldest daughter responds, picking her head up for a moment from her hands to speak.

And Carl gives a mumbled sentence of organizing the food before disappearing leaving Bella in the doorway. 

The girl stares down at the man in the bed… she wants to go after Carl. The boy didn’t talk to her like he used to though, I’ll give him some space. She tells herself in her head.

“ Now’s not the time for space. ” Her daddy’s voice sings to her. She turns her head searching for the source, but her daddy doesn’t want to be seen right now. Not like how her feet want to move.

Following the urge to walk, Bella drifts into the cell block, eyes searching for Carl. But the boy isn’t here. 

“ What a good friend you are… ” He draws mockingly.

And Bella grits her teeth, He left by himself . She moves towards the back of the cell block to find another gate door, the only direction Carl went in. Her eyes dance over the gate, the dust covering the bars is swiped away from the lock and the handle.

Gripping at the metal bars, Bella tries to pull the gate open, but it doesn’t move. Carl went into the prison by himself, what was he thinking?!

Her heart pounds again, Carl’s in danger all alone, she can’t just leave him to go off… and she can’t alert Lori or Maggie. Hershel needs help, he needs them, Maggie and Lori can help Hershel.

They can’t help Carl.

So, I will.

Bella moves towards the bars of the gate and slips her leg through, slowly pushing her lower body between the thin bars. The girl is grossly thin, but it gives way for her to slip out of the cell block. Her head is slightly too big to slip through the cold metal easily but with a strong tug and sharp pulls on her ears, she escapes the cell block and enters the hallway.

Following the walls, there’s only one way to go, so Bella moves slowly down the hall, her blade pulled from her waistband.

The hall is so dark that she can’t see, her eyes strain for some site but the dark doesn’t grant it. The only thing that helps her further into the prison is the almost slight thump of what she believes is a body dropping to the ground. 

Hand tracing against the wall, Bella darts farther down the hall taking a corner to see the beam of a flashlight dancing on the gross walls.

Carl raises his gun, the goofy silencer quietly dropping another walker to the ground. The boy moves with steadiness, arms firm in their position, his flashlight in one and his gun in the other. 

He doesn’t notice Bella in the darkness, and he turns to leave as another walker begins to stand from the ground, the corpse having laid against it seemingly dead… well completely dead. 

Bella moves swiftly as the walker stands silently to attack Carl as the boy's back is turned. Kicking at the back of the walker’s decaying knee, the walker falls harshly to his hands and knees. Carl whips around quickly with his gun ready to pull the trigger but Bella is faster, hand grabbing the walker’s hair to steady its head before driving the knife down hard into the skull.

Carl has wide eyes as he watches Bella pull the blade out with a grunt. The body splattering to the floor. The boy doesn’t talk and neither does his eyes. 

He merely turns his back and continues down the hall. And it twists Bella’s chest- he just dismissed her without words… without a single look, just a turn of his shoulder. 

But she stays close to his back even as her heart twists weirdly, something she’s never felt before.

The girl doesn’t notice how long it takes for them to get to the infirmary, only that they do. 

Carl cracks the door open, gun dancing across the open room in search of threats. And with the room cleared, he side-steps for Bella to slip inside and slams the door closed, pulling a chair over to block it.

The infirmary is smaller than she expected it to be, there’s three little cells that don’t reach the ceiling, hospital beds nestled inside against the far wall, a front desk pushed against the right side of the room, and a few cabinets with locks on them on the left, two doors splitting up the cabinets. There are painted names with ‘Dr.’ in front on the glass of the door, Doctor offices , Bella thinks in her head, there could be something good in there .

Letting her eyes dance around the space, Bella finds some bags hanging on some hooks. “There’s some bags over there,” She calls out and moves forward towards them. It would make lugging any supplies they find back to the cell block easier.

Bella doesn’t notice the daggers Carl stares into her back, not as she shakes out the random contents from the duffel bag, all of the fallen objects useless to them.

“Why did you follow me?” Carl questions the girl, forcing her hand to stop. With confused eyes Bella looks at the boy.

His gun has been reholstered but Bella notices how his hand twitches and clenches. “Why do you think?” She responds simply. They both know why she followed.

Carl doesn’t move from his place, “I can handle this myself.” He tells her, his posture trying to copy that of his father; strong and secure. 

I hate it. She thinks as she turns away. The boy is turning into a mini version of Rick, and it disgusts her, makes her skin shiver with goosebumps. Carl’s better than all of them yet he clings to the ‘image’ of Rick, as if Mr. Grimes is someone to look up to.

Carl watches her turn and looks through some open drawers, very little inside. “I don’t need your help.” He tells her with hatred in his eyes, eyes she can’t see. Bella doesn’t respond and that is what truly angers the boy. She never responds, never in the way he wants. The thought of it keeps him awake at night. “You always think you're right.” He spits.

Bella gives a halfhearted look over her shoulder as she stuffs some individually wrapped gauze into the duffle bag, “I usually am.”

“Killing my dad is right?” He shoots back faster than she expected, the question freezing her in her spot.

And Carl waits.

He waits and watches as Bella stills her hands. “Your daddy killed my daddy.” She says softly, so quietly he almost can’t hear it with her back turned to him. 

Carl grits his teeth at the same response she always gives him, “Shane tried to kill my dad first.” He tells her once more.

This conversation has been repeated so many times no one can remember the exact number. It would always start the same and end the same. But it wouldn’t this time, Carl was going to make sure of it. They were talking about this here and now.

Bella turns towards Carl letting the bag thump to the ground, “Would you have tried avenging him if it went the way my daddy planned?” Carl doesn’t respond to the question; he merely adjusts his feet in the place he stands. And Bella can’t help the small knowing smile that forms on her face. “You would have.” She tells him and takes a few steps towards her friend. “We both know you would.” She admits quietly between them both, as though she was telling him ‘I won’t judge you for it’.

The tone of her voice makes Carl livid, “Shane planned to kill my dad,” He spits at her, taking his own strong step forward- closing the gap between them even more, “Or do you just ignore that?” He hums as he looks her in the eyes. Bella twists her lips and doesn’t respond. The silence makes Carl happy, and he points at her with an accusing finger, “Exactly! You think you’re right but you’re not!” He spits at her.

And Bella doesn’t know what to say without making things worse. Carl’s wrong, he’s her best friend and everything she has but she’s willing to admit that Carl was wrong. 

“ He’s turning against you… ”  Her daddy’s voice says in the silence. The mere thought of her daddy makes her angry and right now with the sound of his voice and the things he’s saying… Bella is livid. She’s not crazy enough to think he didn’t have some part to play in his death, but he was still murdered, and Rick needs to pay. “ I’m not surprised. Perhaps if you- ”

“Shut up!” Bella calls out, snapping her head to the side where the voice comes from. But no one stands there.

Carl’s scoffs, the sound pulls her head back forward, “And now you’re going crazy just like your daddy. ” He spits at her and looks around.

He heard, of course he did, she wasn’t quiet. “Shut up, Carl!” She shouts at him, “Shut up.” Her hands find her hair, fingers gripping and pulling to anchor her to reality. Her feet pace slightly and Carl watches with concern and vindication. Turning back to the boy, Bella promises him, “I’m going to kill your dad for what he did and there’s nothing you can do to stop it.”

The boy’s little smile drops, and he looks deeply at her, “If you kill him… I’ll kill you.” He promises right back.

Bella smiles, a crude and evil smile, “No you won’t. You don’t have the guts.” She tells him. Her mind races and her heart beats so harshly she doesn’t know how to act, the words just spill from her mouth. 

“I won’t need them.” Carl shoots back quickly, “We promised to stay together and you’re betraying me…”

“I’m not betraying you.”

Carl screams, “You’re trying to kill my dad!” The shout echoes on the walls and bounces around Bella’s head.

They should stay quiet, they both know it, but Bella can’t help her own scream bubble out of her throat, “He deserves to die! Planned or not, Rick killed my daddy, and he needs to be punished-!”

Bella’s words are cut off by the pain that blooms on the left side of her face, and the scrapping of her palms on the floor. 

Laying on her side, Bella blinks her eyes rapidly as her hand finds her face. She looks up to Carl from her place on the floor. Carl… hit me?  

He hit her.

He closed his fist and swung at her cheek before she could even finish her sentence.

Emotions dance on Carl’s face as heat flares in his knuckles. He hit a girl, he hit his friend… he hit his best friend. 

And he can’t help but think she deserved it… and how good it felt. “You’re not my friend,” He says from above her as a dribble of blood and saliva falls from the corner of her mouth, “Not anymore.”

Tears begin to brim in her eyes but the anger of earlier fills her chest. Spitting the blood to the ground, she pulls her thin leg back and drives it at Carl’s shin, the boy having moved close to her as she was on the ground.

The boy falls hard to the ground and Bella jumps to her feet as quickly as she can. She stumbles, the blood rushing from her head making her eyes dance with sparks of light. In her daze, she pulls back and throws her entire body into a punch to Carl’s face. 

Together as one, both bodies fall to the ground. The bridge of Carl’s nose lights up in flames, similar to Bella’s knuckles that she’s certain cracked loudly in her hand during the hit.

Laying on the dirty floor, Bella twists on her back, her body having not moved so much in almost a year. “You’re a coward!” She screams out as she moves to stand. 

Carl wipes his mouth and moves to stand easier than Bella had. “I’m not the one scared of the truth!” Bella watches from her knees as Carl fully stands, the girl trying to catch her breath. “Shane was nice… and then he went crazy and tried to kill my dad!”

“Because your mom made him!” She responds, pushing herself to her feet.

“My mom didn’t do anything!” Blood drips down his face like a stream breaking away from the river.

The sight makes Bella’s face twist, “Your mom fucked my dad the moment we all thought Rick was dead!” She screams, her words almost knock Carl back on his ass. She had never spoken like this before and certainly no one ever told Carl the truth of the little love triangle their parents shared. “And when he came back, she did nothing to push him away. She acted like a child that couldn’t choose between two toys.”

“No, she didn’t.” He denies.

Bella laughs in short huffs, “Of course she did, Carl!” The boy shakes his head, wanting to deny the truth but he knows it is the truth. “Why do you think she wanted to get rid of the baby so badly!?” Bella hums and swings her hands around, “Because she doesn’t know who’s baby it is; your daddy’s or mine.” She growls harshly and Carl’s hands knock her to the ground again.

“Shut up,” He growls standing over her and she goes to kick at his legs once more. 

Carl dodges the expected kick, pulling himself backwards and giving Bella way to stand in a loaded hunch. They could both see it on each others faces, no more talking, just anger finally breaking to the surface.

With a short shout, Bella takes off and tackles Carl, his head bounces off the floor at impact. Bella crawls her way to his stomach to trap him on the ground, her knees secure on either side of the boy.

Her hands raise and deliver blows to the boy’s head and chest. The hits are full of anger but do not land with real injury to Carl, the swings are sloppy and uncoordinated. 

Carl covers his face with his hands, trying to block the flurry of hits from the girl above him. In a burst of adrenaline, he grabs Bella's thin arms, his fingers closing fully around the limb. Carl swings her to the side, throwing her away from him.

She rolls away from the boy, and she stands up in a daze, eyes finding Carl darting towards her. He connects with her chest and slams both of them into one of the metal cabinets on the left side of the room.

Holding her against the metal, Carl slams her against the cabinet by his grip on her shoulders. Neither really know why they're fighting, just that it feels good to. Grabbing at Carl’s flannel, Bella tries pushing against him but she’s too weak.

So, as he pulls her back to slam her against the cabinet again, Bella pulls herself to the side, slipping from Carl’s grip and falling against the office door, her too large shirt hooking onto the handle and pulling it down. 

The bottom of her shirt audibly tears as she pulls away. 

Carl and Bella stare at each other, separated with nothing but empty infirmary floor between them. Both huff breaths into their lungs as they stare each other down but the fire in their eyes is dying slowly, exhaustion filling them instead. 

Exhaustion that is ignored as the office door slowly opens between the two of them. Both of their heads whip over to the slow creaking, all to watch as a hand wraps around the frame. 

Breathes shuddering, Carl and Bella don’t even notice how they step away to each other's sides. The door moves slowly, opening fully to expose a walker dress in a doctor’s coat.

Carl draws his gun to shoot at the walker but Bella’s hand grabs at his arm pulling him to the back of the infirmary. “What the hell-?” He questions as the first walker falls to the ground and gets trampled by more that flow out of the office. 

With wide-eyes, Carl follows behind Bella as she slips inside one of the hospital cells and swings the door closed. 

Both of them back up to the cinder block wall as at least a dozen or two walkers surround the metal bars, dead hands reaching inward to get at them. 

They look at each other with frightened eyes as the growling gets louder and louder.

Chapter Text

The woods are quiet as they drift through them. The trees and leaves move gently in the breeze, as though the chance of a painful death didn’t reside behind every turn.

Daryl treks through the brush with careful quiet steps, his eyes dancing across things that Bella can’t see, with practice ease. His crossbow is held loosely in his arms, his signature leather vest over his back. He’s out there to hunt for food, dragging Bella along with him.

It’s been a night since Bella and Carl came back into the cell block with two duffel bags filled with medical supplies and medicine. There wasn’t much in the infirmary once they finally began searching it; but there was enough for Hershel. 

Lori was flooded with concern when they got back, the blood of walkers covering their arms and clothes alongside their faces that had already begun swelling.

And a night since the prisoner, Thomas, tried killing Rick after he killed Big Tiny. The large man had gotten scratched by a walker on his back and there was nothing anyone could do to help him, so Thomas took his bat and beat Big Tiny’s head to mush. And as they went to clear a cell block, Thomas ‘accidentally’ swung his bat too close to Rick’s head and let a walker through to tackle the sheriff. 

The prisoner didn’t last too long after that; Rick killed Thomas with a swift blow to his head, his machete finding a place easily. The smaller black man, Andrew, tried avenging his friend but failed. He got attacked by walkers when he ran from Rick, who closed the metal gate to the secluded courtyard Andrew ran into, where a dozen walkers happened to be wandering in.

The remaining two prisoners, Oscar and Axel, were allowed to stay in the cell block with a promise. ‘Come near any of our people and you will be killed’. They were left after that. Left to clean up the dead bodies and figure out their own way.

The group calmed down slightly after that: Beth and T-Dog made dinner for everyone with the rice and beans from the prison cafeteria, Hershel’s wound was tended to, and the kids, Bella and Carl, moved around together… almost like normal, surprising everyone in the group. But the bruises on their faces and hands were noticeable, neither saying anything when questioned about it.

That annoyed Rick. So, the sheriff devised a quick plan for Daryl to take Bella to try talking to her while Rick talks to his son.

So here they are, drifting through the woods searching for food and Daryl waiting for the moment to question Bella.

She trails behind him annoyed. “Wanna talk about it?” Daryl asks quietly, his gruff voice drifting away in the soft breeze.

“About what?” The girl responds normally as she rubs at her right hand. She wrapped it with the remainder of her ripped shirt once she got to the cell block, trying to contain the swelling. She had gotten some clean water and rags for her and Carl to whip themselves down, to keep the infected blood from their open wounds.

Daryl snaps his head back, “Keep yo’ voice down.” He growls quietly. Hunting for animals meant being quiet and with the walkers that are attracted by sound… Being quiet was a key to survival.

Bella looks at Daryl sharply, crossing her arms over her chest as she steps to his side, “I didn’t want to come out, but you made me.” She calls back to him, slightly quieter now that she’s by his side.

They stare daggers at each other for a pregnant moment before Daryl huffs and begins his walk again.

“ It’s almost like he cares… ” Shane’s voice drifts through the trees. Bella shivers and moves to follow behind the man.

They move through the green foliage and make it to a backwater road. Daryl begins following it, eyes keeping track of the signs and their landmarks.

Bella watches his back as she follows him, her hand rubbing at her bruised knuckles once more. It’s so quiet where they are, their footsteps barely making noise. The girl tries staying behind Daryl, not wanting to walk side by side with the redneck. But he slows his feet making her catch up.

“Is your hand alright?” He asks with a nod.

Bella gives a finally hard rub hoping it will dull the pain for a while. “It’s fine.” She says simply letting it fall limply to her side.

The redneck nods slightly and looks forward as he speaks, “I still don’t get how you and Carl got hurt,” he calls into the air.

And Bella gives him a sharp look. “If you can’t figure it out then I’ve given you too much credit.” She spits. She doesn’t understand why adults talk like that, like they don’t understand when everyone knows they do; it's more annoying than she could ever explain. 

Daryl grits his teeth at her response. “Wanna talk?” He says instead. 

And he receives another sideways glance as the site of a tiny gas station comes into view, “You already asked that.” Her tone and demeanor are expressing boredom. She’s already discussed things with Carl, no one else needs to go questioning them.

“ Mr. Daryl’s just trying to help… ” Shane’s voice draws out, causing Bella to increase her steps towards the tiny gas station. “ I hope you don’t think he’s your new daddy… he sure is acting like it. ”

Bella grits her teeth and moves towards the front door that seems to be unlocked but Daryl grabs her arm pulling her back. His crossbow is over his back, and he stares down at her. “Talk.” He commands, “I ain’t asking.”

Bella pulls her arm out and backs away slightly, “Is Mr. Grimes doing the same with Carl right now?” She questions.

The redneck nods and Bella’s faces grimace in annoyance, “Yeah… he didn’t want you hoverin’.” The man tells her.

“I don’t … ‘hover’.” Bella sasses like a child. Daryl gives her a look. 

Daryl walks over to the opposite side of the road from the gas station. Bella drags her feet behind him, dropping herself down next to him on the curb. “What did you fight about?” He asks simply while not looking at her.

“Nothing,” Daryl gives her a sideways look and she wiggles in her spot before changing her answer, “The normal things.” She says simply and Daryl gives an understanding nod.

Everyone in the group knew that the pair would fight, especially when the group was under a lot of stress on the road. But never had it gotten physical.

It hurts Bella to think about it, that they got so angry at each other they started fighting physically… like their dads. But they wouldn’t be like them; Bella and Carl care for each other… She thinks.

“Never gotten’ like that.” Daryl responds looking at her face. The girl had a shiner on her left cheek that bleeds up to her eye, a slight cut torn open on her cheek and lip. Both cuts had already crusted over with a scab. Just like Carl’s cut on his nose. “Anything else happen?” Daryl pushes for more.

Bella sighs and picks at the skin around her fingers, “We talked.”

“After you beat each other,” Daryl calls back quickly.

“We’re like our daddies,” she regrets it as soon as it leaves her mouth. Bella didn’t mean to say it, but it was at the front of her mind. Our daddies fought and seemed to make up, but they still tried killing each other… still killed each other. In a way.

“Except you ain’t gonna plan to kill Carl,” Daryl’s voice pulls her from her mind. She doesn’t notice how her hand clenched into a fist as she side-eyes the man next to her. “Quit clenching that hand or I’ll give you a matchin’ shiner.” He tells her partially as a joke, staring her down. His posture is relaxed, not worried in the face of the girl whose anger was slowly building again.

She gives him a twisted smirk, “You wouldn’t hit a little girl.” Daryl is a decent man; he wouldn’t hit a child.

But the man laughs in her face, “You ain’t no regular ‘little girl’.” He tells her and Bella can’t respond because she knows he’s right. She isn’t regular. She isn’t normal… she never was. Daryl leans back against the guardrail that stands behind them, “What exactly happened?” He questions with his arms crossed.

Bella can’t do anything but tell him…

The walkers growl loudly in the infirmary, the sound echoing off the stone walls. Bella thanks whatever, or whoever, is out there in the universe, that there doesn’t seem to be any walkers banging on the door from the hallway. Less dead people to have to kill.

But that doesn’t change the fact that there're eighteen walkers surrounding the cell they’re in. Carl and Bella are squeezed tight together in the cell, not wanting to get close to the hands that reach inside.

Bella licks her lip, her tongue bursting with iron blood. “We can stab them through the bars.” She offers to the boy that sits next to her on the ground.

Carl sighs slowly, his hands rubbing anxiously together. “There’s too many.” He responds without looking at her.

Unlike Bella, who’s been watching him, “Well we can’t stay here forever.” They both know that, but this wasn’t something they’ve ever dealt with. One or two walkers they’ve handled… not this.

Carl drops his head into his hands, “Just let me think.” He rubs his forehead, pulling at the cut across his nose and making it bubble with blood. 

Bella watches the blood tear down his face like he’s crying. Unconsciously, she grabs at her torn shirt to slip it off her head. Carl watches as she rips at the tear in the cloth, pulling a strip off the bottom of her shirt. 

She slips the shirt back over her head, covering her dirty tank top underneath, before pulling her knife from her waistband. The boy watches as she slices the piece of cloth. The smaller piece is handed to Carl.

He grabs it hesitantly, almost confused so Bella balls it up slightly and pushes it into his left hand and up to his face. “Leave that there.” She commands as Carl adjusts his hold on his nose, the cloth trying to stop the blood from falling.

In the silence- relative silence- Bella grabs Carl's hand, her own hesitates for a moment before she grabs it. Twisting in her spot, she places his right hand on her leg; he watches her carefully. Grabbing the remaining cloth, Bella begins wrapping his knuckles, making sure it’s not too tight but tight enough to stop the swelling that’s already starting. She can see the swelling on her own.

“ Look at you, ” Shane voice calls from outside the cell. She turns her head to peek at the source, but her daddy isn’t there. “ Such a good little friend… almost like you- ”

“There might be some medicine inside the offices,” she says so quickly and loudly it startles Carl in his place, his eyes jumping to her face. She takes a breath and knots the cloth off. “If we can kill all these walkers and get over there…” She pulls her hands away but doesn’t push Carl’s hand off her leg.

Carl nods, “I don’t have enough ammo.”

“I’ll stab and you shoot.”

Carl doesn’t respond, he merely looks at her. “What?” Bella questions at the look on his face. 

He sighs hard and pulls away his hand, tucking it into his lap. Bella misses the warmth, “Was it true?” He says to his lap, but Bella knows it’s for her, “What you said about my mom?” He clarifies. Bella’s breath jumps as she freezes noticeably. She drops her head and avoids her friend’s eyes as she turns to lean back against the wall. The walkers continue their growls outside the metal bars. Carl knows what the silence can lead to,  “Don’t lie to me, or sugarcoat or whatever you do. Just tell me. Was it true?” He insists and Bella knows she can’t lie.

I shouldn’t lie… he already had his suspicions. 

Bella swallows and picks at her ripped jeans. “Yeah, most of it.” Her head thumps against the cinder blocks as she drops it back.

“How long have you known?” Carl asks as he pulls the cloth away from his nose dropping the blood-soaked cloth to his knee.

Bella sighs and goes to speak, “Since the farm fell-”

“Don’t. Lie. To me.” Carl interrupts. He picks up on her tone change with her sigh. He’s been paying attention to her signals; when she lies, when she’s angry, when she thinks… all of it. He hasn’t had anything else to do during the winter.

She licks her lips, knowing she should just be honest, but her heart wants her to lie. She doesn’t want him to know everything… But she knows he needs to know. “I didn’t know for sure until the CDC,” she says honestly.

Carl looks at her as though she killed his puppy, “You never told me?” His voice pitches in blocked emotion.

“Your daddy came back from the dead! Of course I wasn’t going to tell you.” She shoots back, her own voice pitching in emotion that can’t be contained on her face.

Carl leans back, the energy leaving his body, “I would’ve told you…” His voice is filled with hurt.

And it twists Bella’s own heart even more. “You were happy,” her throat hurts as she tries holding back her sadness, “I couldn’t do that to you.”

Carl lets them listen to the groaning of the walkers for a moment. “But you knew.” He accuses her, his voice hardening.

Bella snaps her eyes over to him. She could feel his anger building and focusing on her, “Daddy was going to take me away.” She almost cries to him, “Your mom told him to leave… before Sophia went missing,” Carl turns to look at her, “They weren't even going to tell me,” the boy’s eyes widen as she speaks, “Or you.” Bella doesn’t notice how she leans towards Carl. “I told him to figure it out…” Carl watches her face carefully… and he knows it’s true. “I guess he didn’t try hard enough.” She whispers gently, almost to herself.

A beat of silence as the reality sets in. “And the baby?” Carl whispers underneath the groans of the walkers.

Bella smiles painfully as she looks over at Carl, “Why do you think your daddy is so cold to your mom?” His eyes find hers, “She doesn’t know.” 

And Carl knows it's true. 

Everything that happened, everything that hasn’t happened, it all made sense. The separation between his parents, the awkwardness whenever anyone even mentioned the farm and what happened.

They all knew.

Everyone… except Carl.

“So, it could be your sibling?” He asks, looking forward.

“Yeah…” Bella says even though he already knows the answer.

And the silence grows between them, neither speaking after Bella’s voice died out. Everything Carl thought, all the ideas that filled his head when he was by himself… they are true.

All of them are true.

“ What a good idea, sweetheart! ” Shane cheers at Bella side in the silence, “ Turn Carl against his own parents… than he can help you- ”

“He’s not helping,” Bella growls, turning her head to her other side. Carl looks at her with concerned eyes.

Carl leans forward to look at Bella, “He’s not real, you know?” Bella turns her head over to him with wide eyes. He watches as she tries to control her face and wipe the anger and surprise off her face. “I know you talk to him… I’ve noticed for a while.”

Bella sucks in a shuttered breath. “Yeah…” she starts, “He talks sometimes.” The weight of it pulls off her chest. Carl knew she was seeing things on the farm, but she could play it off as fear. But this… this wasn’t normal.

“He’s not real.”

Bella nods, “I know.” She says honestly.

Carl bites at his lip, “I don’t think I could forgive you if you killed him,” Bella eyes drift to Carl’s face. The boy had leaned back to the wall, eyes following his fingers as they play with each other. “I… I know-” He takes a steady breath, “I know why… you want to kill him. I- I get it.” His words are forced out in struggle. “I would feel the same…” Bella’s eyes soften as he speaks, "But-”

“But what?”

Carl looks at Bella, sadness in his own eyes, “I know you saw it,” He gives her a broken smile that doesn’t reach his eyes, “Shane was… different.” Bella’s eyes drop in agreement. “He wasn’t ‘Shane’ anymore near the… near the end.” 

Bella shallows hard, “He was still my dad.” She says with tears in her eyes.

Just like Carl’s eyes, “I know. I know…” Bella never noticed until now- how much her daddy’s death hurt Carl. Shane was practically the boy’s uncle, and he died trying to kill Rick. Carl pulls back his tears and avoids eye contact with Bella.  “I’m mad at them too.” Bella looks at him as he speaks, “My mom and dad.” Carl sighs hard and snaps his sock against his skin. “I knew something was happening, but no one would tell me the truth…” his voice drifts off.

“Until now,” Bella finishes for him.

“Until now,” he agrees. “If my mom had just- just told my dad about it,” he thinks out loud, as though the walker’s groaning would keep everything, he says a secret from the world. “Everything would’ve worked out, right?” He turns his eyes to Bella’s. “And if- ugh… I don’t know, I just-” 

“Miss the way things were?” Bella offers him; she wished for the same thing every day.

Carl nods softly, “Yeah… I miss the way things were.” His words give way to another break of silence in the cell. Bella watches the walkers move without true purpose outside the cell bars. And she almost jumps out of her skin as Carl’s shoulder touches her own. She freezes in her place at the warmth and steadies her breath as he grabs her hand in a tight hold. “Bee, please,” He begs as she looks down at their hands. “Please don’t kill my dad.” She draws her head over to him. “I couldn’t- I can’t handle losing him and… and you.” He whispers into the air between them.

“I wouldn’t go anywhere.” She promises him.

Carl looks over her face, “The group wouldn’t keep you around… you know that.”

“I don’t-”

“Promise me, Bee.” He stops her- stops anything she may say, “Please promise me,” He begs her, hand squeezing tight as though he can make her agree.

The girl sighs deeply, eyes looking Carl over. “I can’t promise something like that,” Carl opens his mouth to respond, “But I can-” She stops him. And takes a deep steading breath, “I can… wait?” Carl’s eyes widen and he sits up straighter. Bella bites her bottom lip as though she’s fighting with a deep part of herself. “I can wait.” She says with more strength. “If that will… if it will make you happy- I can wait.” 

Carl doesn’t know what to say. He can see the pain on Bella’s face as she speaks but he knows that she means it. So, he just smiles and jumps at her, drawing her into a tight hug. “Thank you, Bella.” His voice comes from her shoulder.

And Bella hugs back, hands turning into fists at Carl’s back, as though it would keep him by her side. “I will kill him, Carl. I swear that to you,” she whispers between them. Carl pulls back slightly, eyes finding Bella’s. And she gives him a small smile, “But I’ll wait until it’s time.” She promises him. 

Daryl looks over at Bella, “I ain’t believing the end of that story,” Bella gives him a sharp look.

“Ask Carl then.” She sasses at him. It is not her job to make Daryl believe her.

The redneck stands up from the curb and stretches a bit. “That why Carl snapped at Lori?” He questions as he pulls his crossbow from his back, “Glenn mentioned it.” He says softly as he raises his crossbow.

When they had gotten back from the infirmary with the medical supplies they had found, Lori was happy for the supplies but not with Carl and Bella going off on their own. Probably more of Carl going alone with Bella, the mother didn’t trust the girl, not after everything. And when she told Carl that, he snapped back at her. The boy didn’t like being treated like a child, it’s all anyone ever did.

Bella watches Daryl without much concern; he obviously sees something that he’s going to kill. “I’m not a mind reader.” She responds to him.

The man stays silent for a moment as he pulls the trigger, a scuffle coming from the animal he hit. “So, you ain’t gonna kill Rick?” He asks as he walks over to the other side of the road for his bounty.

Bella stands at his slight nod to follow, “Were you not listening?” She questions as his back is turned.

Daryl gives her a look over his shoulder before rolling his eyes. The girl was difficult to talk to… but then again, this was the most she’s talked in a long time. Bending down, Daryl grabs at his green colored arrow bolt. “You need to eat more,” He comments as he pulls the kill from the brush. 

Bella can’t hide her look of surprise as Daryl turns around with two rabbits stuck on the bolt, it is going through their heads. “I’m fine.” She says even though she is awestruck by the man, she ignores the offering of the dead rabbit he hands towards her.

And Daryl doesn’t care about her words, so he tosses the animal at her. “That one’s all yours,” he calls as it slaps into the girl’s surprised hands.

“I’m not hungry.” She shoots back as she holds it back out to the man.

“Too bad.” He gruffs out to her as he moves towards the curb once again, “Know how to skin it?” He questions as he pulls his blade.

Bella shakes her head, “No.” 

The redneck nods down next to him, Bella sitting down to watch Daryl skin the rabbit. Bella follows his movements with her own knife. 

Daryl goes through the process without speaking, just a few words meant to fix Bella’s cuts. And she does, finishing her rabbit a few minutes after Daryl.

Taking the rabbit from her, Daryl slips the two rabbits on a stick and begins making a small fire. They are silent as the fire starts to burn and as the rabbits cook over it.

Turning the rabbit over on the spit, Daryl looks across to Bella. “He been talkin’ to you a lot?”

The girl sighs knowing exactly what he meant, “Sometimes… when it’s quiet.” She admits.

Daryl nods in understanding as he hands over a rabbit to the girl. She eats slowly, tearing small pieces off at a time. The redneck reprimands her for it; she doesn’t eat enough even when she wants to eat more.

Munching on his rabbit, Daryl tears out the leg bones throwing them into the fire. “Tell me when he talks to you,” He calls as he slurps on the cooked meat. Bella looks at him with a raised eyebrow, “Your hallucatin’ your dead daddy. That ain’t normal.”

Bella smiles at Daryl, an almost genuine smile, “You said it yourself… I’m no regular little girl.”

Chapter Text

It’s been two days since the little hunting trip. Bella and Daryl had trailed back to the prison with a mixture of squirrels and rabbits tied together, about a dozen total, later that afternoon. Daryl assigned the girl with skinning and cleaning the animals as he ‘handled something’, also known as talking to Rick about what they discussed. Bella wasn’t that stupid, and Daryl knew that.

Rick only gave Daryl a huff and pat on the shoulder before stalking off, Bella could see it from her place in the corner of the main room- the group’s cafeteria connected to the cell block. Carl had come over and asked her about what she and the redneck talked about, she responded ‘the same as you and your dad’. Carl laughed at that and relaxed next to her, trying to follow her newly learned movements for cleaning their dinner.

The next day consisted of cleaning and burning the bodies scattered throughout their new home. T-Dog and Glenn had found a prison work truck that started up easy, they drove it to the entryway of the cell block to stack the dead bodies inside before driving them to a secluded empty courtyard to burn.

The bodies from the yard joined the ones from inside, black smoke drifting into the air as the flesh burned off the bones. Rick oversaw it all, commanding and lifting and moving about to get the area clean.

Carl and Maggie were outside too helping with the bodies while inside Beth, Carol, Lori, and Bella worked on cleaning the cell block. Daryl had found a supply closet inside the communal shower room with cleaning supplies and tools, all of which were used to freshen up the area.

Halfway through the day Hershel fully woken up from his injury. The old man had woken in spurts over the last few days but never fully present. Everyone joined together to see him awake; it meant everything to see him awake.

Carol mentioned cleaning his wound once everyone was done and Hershel called for Bella to help. The girl was confused but sat by Carol’s side as Hershel helped the older woman change the bandage. 

Hershel took a look himself to see for infection and trauma, and given the circumstances he determined the work Carol and Rick had done were good; his leg, or lack thereof, was healing well.

The doctor then had Carol step to the side, calling for Bella to take her place. The older woman watched slightly confused but stood by as Hershel led the girl through wrapping his wound.

“Why do you want me to do this?” Bella asked him as she stared down at the raw and scabbing wound.

Hershel gave her a wince as he adjusted himself on the bed, “It’s good for you to learn.” He stated and she gave him a raised brow. “I can’t be the only person that knows how to do this.”

And the girl gave him a simple nod before wrapping his wound. 

The day went normal after that. Bella and Carl had taken watch later that night in a watchtower, they sat side by side looking over the yard in relative comfortable silence until Glenn and Maggie came up to switch.

The next day involved more cleaning and securing the already secured prison. But it was a slow day, a day to relax for a moment after everything that had happened.

Today, Rick is discussing making runs to stores they had circled on a map. Their current supplies weren’t going to last forever, and they needed things for the baby that would be coming soon.

Lori tries to hide her fear, but they can see it on her face, especially when she talks about it. Her first pregnancy, the one with Carl, was okay in terms of pregnancy but Carl was delivered through C-section. And Lori was told that if she ever had another child, it would most likely be the same. 

It was a very reasonable fear.

The only thing that kept Lori sane was Carl’s excitement for the baby, for his new baby sibling. Carl and Bella had discussed at some point in the darkness about it, only a few sentences passed between them.

“What do you want to name them?” Carl had questioned underneath the stars.

Bella had shrugged her shoulders, Carl felt the motion, “I think that’s your decision, isn’t it?” She could see Carl’s head turn to her in question, “It’s your sibling.”

“But you said-”

“They’re your sibling.” Bella interrupts, “Not mine.”

Carl breaths out, “Do you really think so?”

Bella nods in the darkness, “Yes, I do.” She tells him honestly.

It seemed that her calling the baby Carl’s full sibling changed his attitude. He wasn’t as snippy or cold at times; he was excited again. It brought some life back to the group.

It made Bella happy. 

So here she is banging and squishing her fingers with metal tools as she tries undoing the rusty bolts inside her cell. Carl had mentioned creating a cell just for the baby, so Bella is pulling apart the metal bunk bed…  trying to at least. A baby can’t sleep on a bunk bed.

T-Dog had grabbed some tools and left the girl to herself as he went on watch.

There are a total of eight bolts holding the bunkbed to the cement wall, all of which are almost gone. The last is rustier than the rest and crumbling with each turn of the wrench in Bella’s hands.

She hears footsteps come behind her over the soft chatter of Hershel and Beth in the cell near her.

The voice that calls out freezes her hands for a moment. “What are you doing?” Rick questions her.

Her toolbox is just outside the cell door and the thin mattresses has been thrown into the hallway. She gives him a look as she reaches over from her spot on the floor to drag the metal box across the stone, the sound screeching out.

Bella doesn’t respond as she pulls out a different tool, that she doesn’t know the name of, to try twisting at the bolt. Rick audibly licks his lips and leans against the door jam. “Carl said you called off your little murder mission for me.” He says into the cell.

Rick watches the girl shake the metal bed as she tries at this last damn bolt. “I didn’t ‘call it off’,” she grunts out with a hard push to her tool. And the bolt snaps free. Bella smiles to herself as she pulls it out and stands to her feet. “I said I’d wait.” She tells him as she turns, pushing at the bunk bed causing it to tip over in the small cell. Finally looking at the man, Bella can see how his arms are crossed as he leans. “Do you need something, Mr. Grimes?” She asks as she places the tool into the toolbox. 

Rick looks around the cell, “There’s other things that need to be done if you're that bored.” 

Bella gives him a disinterested look. “Carl wants a place for the baby,” She tells him and takes a step forward forcing her head up to look up at him, “Is that okay with you?” Her tone is filled with attitude.

Rick pulls off the metal, standing to his full height. It makes Bella feel small. “Glenn, Daryl, and I are going out for some firewood-” He starts.

Bella interrupts knowing where his little speech is heading, “The only person I’ll hurt is you Mr. Grimes.” She tells him honestly, “Don’t worry about it.” Bella smiles at him.

Rick has no choice but to nod and leave as Bella turns her back to him to pull at the bunk frame; she’ll need some help with it… whether she admits it or not.

But she’s interrupted once more as Carl comes up with Lori by his side. “What are you doing?” He asks her.

Bella turns to face him, “Getting rid of the bunk; a baby can’t sleep in a bunk.” Carl gives her a little smile as she leaves the bed alone and comes outside of the cell, standing opposite the mother and son. She dusts her hands off on her jeans, the denim tinting in red rust.

Lori looks into the cell, “Where did you find all this stuff?” She asks with interest and a small genuine smile of her own. 

The girl looks at the woman. “Mr. T-Dog found them,” She explains simply.

“We’ll have to get them a crib.” Carl says with a smile.

Bella tacks on, “Maybe some toys too?” She offers with a smile of her own. 

And Lori smiles with them.

“And clothes.” Hershel calls from his cell. The trio steps over to look into the cell. The man is sitting up in his bed, Maggie and Beth by his side with crutches in their hands. “We have some time until then,” he comments with a gentleness.

Bella looks at the scene in confusion, “Should you be getting up, Mr. Hershel?” She asks, concerned for the man. 

His wound had barely scabbed over. “I can’t sit in this bed all day.” He responds with a smile as he grips the metal frame to try standing.

Lori moves over to help him up, Hershel had been talking about standing for two days, not used to laying down for so long. It took everything to keep him resting in bed; Maggie, Beth, Lori, Carol, and everyone else in the group tried convincing him to stay in his place. 

Obviously, it didn’t work.

Hershel pulls himself towards the edge of the bed with some difficulty. He pauses for a moment at the edge as his foot rests on the ground. Hershel stares at where both his feet should be resting…

With a sigh, Hershel looks up to his daughters with a strained smile and motions for the crutches. Beth hands them to her dad and he immediately feels them out. Grasping at the metal and putting some pressure on them.

Taking a deep breath, Hershel finds a stable hand placement and begins to pull himself up straight. Hershel wobbles and falls back to the bed; the distance of the fall was not grand. 

“Daddy, don’t push yourself.” Beth calls out, her voice full of concern.

Her dad smiles at her and looks up at her from his seat, “What else am I going to do?” He adjusts himself and takes another steading breath. Hershel pulls himself up and stands, quickly slipping the crutches into their place underneath his armpits. “I can’t stand looking at the bottom of that bunk.” Everyone stands at the ready to catch the man now that he is fully standing. “You know? I can go pretty steady.” Hershel calls with a smile, moving a few steps in the cell.

Lori smiles at him, one hand out in front of Hershel and the other holding her large stomach. “That’s a good start. Want to take a rest?” She offers.

“Rest?” He repeats with a smile, “Let’s go for a little stroll.” No one tries stopping him as he moves out of the cell. 

Hershel follows Bella and Carl who take the lead. They open the door to the courtyard at his request and hold it open for Maggie to take over as they open the last gate down the stairs.

Once Hershel is through, Maggie goes down some steps and stand in front of Hershel who stands at the top.

“I got you here if you need it,” Lori informs him. Her hand low near the man’s belt in case she needs to catch him. As though she could hold him if he fell- even pregnant, Lori was still lighter than Hershel, the man was thick with years of farm work muscle that hasn’t disappeared.

“Just take your time on those steps.” Beth tacks on.

Hershel listens but can’t help getting distracted as he looks out to the yards. “You cleared all those bodies out? It’s startin’ to look like a place we could really live in.” The smile on his face is infectious.

“Hey, you watch your step. Last thing we need is you falling.” She lightly scolds. 

Hershel finishes the final step and begins to move about the cement yard in earnest. He doesn’t move fast but he is steady with the help of Beth and Lori that stand by his side.

Bella smiles slightly at the site even as it hurts her heart; Maggie and Beth have their dad… she doesn’t and it’s a constant reminder. So, she turns her eyes away to look out at the green yard. 

Rick, Daryl, and Glenn are coming through the outside fence, firewood dropped on the ground as they reclosed the cut piece of the fence. Daryl notices them moving first and alerts Glenn and Rick quietly.

Carol and T-Dog join Hershel and the group once they notice as well, smiles adorning their faces. 

And Bella notices the two prison jumpsuits that stand in the alleyway of the outside fence where vehicles could enter. 

“You’re doing great Daddy.” Beth praises.

Carl smiles and circles around to Hershel’s side. “Ready to race, Hershel?” He questions with a smile on his face and a slight squint in his eye at the Georgia sun.

Looking down at Carl, Hershel gives him another smile. “You give me another day, I’ll take you on.” 

“We could try finding a prosthetic.” Bella offers as the group slows down to a stop in the courtyard, “When you’re healed.” She tacks on.

Hershel shrugs his shoulders, “I don’t know. I’m pretty good on these.” He jokes out and everyone smiles.

It’s peaceful and calm. Everyone is outside under the warm sun with smiles on their faces and laughter drifting out of their mouths.

“ You should know better, ” Bella barely contains her jump of fear at the voice as her entire presence dampens like a storm cloud.

Her daddy is right. She should know better; happiness never lasts.

“Walkers! Look out!” Carl’s voice shouts as he spins and pulls his gun.

Everyone turns to see the walkers that trail from the back courtyard that was closed off when that first cleared the prison.

Everyone pulls their weapons as Hershel and Beth hop away to a safe cage. A walker follows behind the old man, but he pushes the corpse away before closing the door.

There are shouts and screams from behind the group as Rick and Daryl sprint through the alley to get to them.

“That gate is open!” T-Dog shouts with a point before darting forward through fallen walkers, Carol at his back with her own gun raised.

“Lori! Here!” Maggie shouts as she pulls open the door to the cellblock. Bella, Carl, and Lori run after Maggie. Carl shoots a few walkers before he gets through the door that Maggie slams closed. 

The group as a whole separated.

Maggie, Carl, Lori, and Bella move into the cell block. Their hearts are pounding with fear and anxiety. Darting down towards the cells, a herd comes falling out of the open door. Maggie turns and pushes the trio behind her through to the hallway that leads deeper into the prison.

Maggie’s gun is pulled as she leads the way through the prison hallways. “This way!” Maggie’s eyes dart side to side as she tries to find her bearings in the dark hallway, the arrows they had once drawn were invisible to her eyes.

Bella is at the back, her own knife pulled, as Lori groans and leans against a dirty wall. “Mrs. Grimes?!” She calls concerned. Carl and Maggie whip their heads towards them.

Bella gently touches the woman’s arm in concern, her head moving side to side for danger.

Maggie grabs at Lori’s arm to support the mother, “Can you keep up?” She asks as she gives the woman a once over for injuries.

She shakes her head that's pointed to the floor in pain, “Something’s not right…” She nearly cries.

Carl moves over, “Are you bit?” 

Lori shakes her head in the darkness, “No, no, no. I think the baby’s coming!” She cries as her body curls up in pain. 

“Mom?”

Walkers groan and come around a corner as Lori cringes in pain.

“No, there’s no time!” Maggie calls as she pushes Carl’s gun down and grabs Lori to support her. They move fast, as fast as they can, through the hallway.

All for another group of walkers to come through on the other side of the corridor. Carl whips his head around to spot a door.

He barrels through and raises his gun, “In here!” The group darts in. Carl closes the door behind Bella, the pair pulling at a cabinet next to the door, blocking it off from the walkers that pass right outside.

Farther in the room, Lori is bent against a wall as they stand in some type of mechanical room. There are pipes and cords in an organized mess against the walls, all that once fed to different parts of the prison. 

Lori is in pain and the rest of the group can only look on in concern. The mother grabs at her body without purpose trying to relieve the pain she feels. She flexes and curls as the contractions light her nerves in fiery pain that she can’t escape.

Lori cries in slight relief as the contraction ends even as the pain echoes through her body and muscles.

Then alarms light up the room with red lights flashing inside. “What are those alarms?” Lori questions as she looks up to the ceiling as another contraction starts.

Bella, Carl, and Maggie look at each other with confused faces. The alarms blare into the room and seem to echo throughout the prison. The lights flashing in rhythm of the alarm.

Maggie shakes her head, “Don’t worry about that.” She tells her. 

“What if it attracts them?” Carl questions as he looks at his mom with terror written on his face. The walkers aren’t the boy’s concern, his mom is.

“We’re fine for now.” Bella assures… tries to assure all of them as she moves near Lori in case the woman needs support.

Maggie nods as looks at the mom as another contraction begins to hit her body. “Lori, let’s lay you down.”

Lori shakes her head through the pain, “No, the baby’s coming now.”

Carl moves about the room gently, following Lori who grasps at a metal pipe. “We have to go back to our cell block to have Hershel help!” 

Maggie shakes her head quickly. “We can’t risk getting caught out there,” Carl’s eyes gleam with concern and fear. “You’re gonna need to give birth to this baby here.” She tells Lori.

Lori pants out a mocking ‘great’ as her breath leaves her lungs in short hard puffs.

Carl holsters his gun and worries about his hands. “What is she doing, can’t she breathe?” He calls out to Maggie.

She nods without looking at the boy, “She’s fine. Come here, let’s get your pants off.” Maggie bends down to help Lori pull her jeans off. 

And Lori nods without a fight, knowing they need to come off. The mom grabs at the bottom of her shirt to give way for Maggie to unbutton and pull the denim from her thin legs. “Okay… Okay…” 

Maggie throws the pants and underwear to the side as Lori lets her shirt fall down her body. She groans once more as pain hits her.

“You’re gonna need to help deliver your baby brother or sister, you up for it?” Maggie questions while looking at Lori, supporting the woman’s hips.

Carl steps slightly closer, “Do you know how?” He questions as he worries for his mom more than anything else.

Lori lays on the ground with Maggie’s help. Maggie spreads the mother’s legs and looks toward Lori, “Dad taught me, but trust me, it’s my first time.” Maggie shakes her head as she looks at Lori. Maggie has her fingers inside Lori as she searches her cervix, “I can’t tell…” She admits to the mom, her fingers pulling free.

And Lori closes her legs to try standing, “I gotta push.” No one fights her as she stands to her feet and finds her place back to the metal pipe.

Lori pushes and pushes with large breaths taken between, Maggie supporting her again.

“You're doing great, Lori. Just keep doing it. Your body knows what to do. Let it do all the work.” Maggie praises the woman as she tries pushing again, “You're doing great.” But Lori screams in pain as she feels her body fight against her and tear apart. “Lori, stop, don’t push, something's wrong!” Maggie pulls a hand away from Lori’s privates covered in blood.

Carl stands next to Lori’s side, “Mom? Mom, look at me, look at me, keep your eyes open!” He cries out grabbing at her hand that holds a white-knuckle grip on the metal pipe.

“We have to get you back to Dad.” Maggie says.

Lori shakes her head. “I won’t make it.” Her voice is defeated… they can all hear it.

Bella watches from the side in stunned silence. Her body is frozen as she watches Lori bleed.

“Lori, with all this blood, I don’t even think you’re fully dilated yet, no amount of pushing is gonna help.”

Lori looks over to Maggie and moves to grip her, “I know what it means, and I’m not losing my baby…” Maggie supports Lori as her knees go weak and she lowers herself to the ground. The mother lays on the stone ground with her knees slightly bent. “You’ve gotta cut me open.” She says gently.

Everyone gathers around Lori on the ground. Carl drops himself next to his mom’s head, she grabs at her son’s hand. Bella numbly falls to Lori’s side.

Maggie shakes her head as fear pulls across her face. “No, I can’t.” She cries out.

“You don’t have a choice.”

Carl begins to stand, “I’ll go for help.”

“No!” Lori screams and pulls him back to the ground.

Tears fall down Maggie’s face as she touches Lori's legs. “Look, Carol’s the one that practiced that, Dad only taught me the steps Lori, if I…” Her words are barely understandable with the cries that soak them. Lori gives her a quiet beg. “I have no anesthetic, no equipment…” Maggie lists off only to be cut off.

Lori gives a small smile, “Carl has a knife.”

Maggie’s face contorts in concern and fear of her own. “You won’t survive.” She responds seriously.

“My baby has to survive… Please…” Lori cries as the sirens go quiet and the lights dim to orange and red. “My baby, for all of us… Please, Maggie! Please.” She reaches to grab at the young woman’s hand. She grasps tightly to Maggie, pleading for her. “Please…”

Maggie gives a small uncertain nod of her head as she reaches for Lori’s shirt. The mother helps by pulling it up to expose her large and pale stomach. “See my old C-section scar?” She asks as her fingers brush against the stretch scar.

“I can’t.” Maggie says once more.

Lori nods at her, “You can. You have to.” And they look to each other, their eye communicating without words, Lori’s are filled with begging and Maggie’s are filled with fear and sorrow. Maggie gives a struggled nod. Lori cries with a smile and reaches for Bella.

The girl stares down as Lori grabs her hands. “Bella, sweetheart, I am so sorry.” The woman cries as Bella stares down with numb fear. “Promise me… promise me you’ll look after Carl,” Bella tries to open her mouth. “I know you will- I know it.” She assures with a cry before reaching for Carl, the boy on Lori’s other side. 

Bella’s heart twists so bad she thinks she’ll die alongside Lori. She didn’t want the mother to die. After everything with her daddy and Lori… Bella doesn’t want to see her dead. She doesn’t want her to die like this- on a dirty prison floor as the group is split fighting for their lives. She knows how it feels. 

This isn’t what she wants for Carl.

The boy is teary eyed leaning over his mom as she grasps at his cheeks in a loving embrace. “Carl? Baby, I don't want you to be scared, okay? This is what I want. This is right.” He nods along with her words even as he wants her to take them back. “Now you- you take care of your daddy for me, all right? And your little brother or sister, you take care…”

“You don't have to do this.” He interrupts with a wet hiccup.

Lori smiles proudly at him, “You're gonna be fine…” Her hands pull him closer. “You are gonna beat this world, I know you will. You are smart, and you are strong, and you are so brave!” She cries as he leans his head to her. Their foreheads touch as Carl’s tears fall to his mother’s face. “ And I love you .” She cries painfully.

Carl pulls back as his cheeks light up red with emotion. “I love you too.” His voice drips in tears.

“You gotta do what's right, baby.” Lori continues as Bella and Maggie watch from the side. “You promise me, you'll always do what's right. It's so easy to do the wrong thing in this world.” Carl nods.  “So don't… so if it feels wrong, don't do it, all right? If it feels easy don't do it. Don't let the world spoil you. You're so good!” Her words are filled with everything she’s always wanted to tell him. She never could… She could never find the right words for her son. But now she has; and they’re the last thing she’s ever going to say to him. “You're my sweet boy! The best thing I ever did! I love you! I love you.” She smooches kisses across his temple. “You're my sweet, sweet boy, I love you.” One last kiss is given to Carl’s nose. The same type of kiss she’d give him before bed. And she pulls away, letting Carl sit back up as Lori looks towards Maggie. “Okay… okay, now. Okay. Maggie, when this is over, you're gonna have to…”

Maggie shakes her head as her lips begin to speak.

“No, you have to do it, it can’t be Rick.” Lori’s head hits hard onto the floor as she cries out. All Maggie can do is give yet another hesitant nod. “Alright, alright, it’s alright. It’s alright…” Bella doesn’t know whether she says it for them or for herself. 

Lori’s eyes drift to the ceiling as her body limps in realization of her last moments in the world. Her face twitches into a small smile as her eyes look to a memory, “Goodnight, love.” She whispers into the air.

Maggie holds Carl’s knife in her hand and the blade hovers over Lori’s scar as the woman’s breathing calms. 

The young woman’s hands shake over Lori’s living body and her head falls, “I can’t, Lori, I can’t.” She cries as the knife falls to her lap. “I can’t kill you.”

But Lori needs to die.

If the baby isn’t born soon then it will join its mother that is bleeding out on the floor. Every second that ticks by is another shade of color Lori loses with her blood. 

And Maggie thinks that it might be best. If Lori passes out from blood loss, then she won’t feel the blade cut into her. Lori won’t feel the steel split her flesh and cut through her nerves as they try to pull her baby from her body.

Her baby that she’s been growing and nourishing for nine months inside her belly. 

But if Lori bleeds out anymore, it will kill the baby. They all know it even though Maggie’s hands shake in fear. 

The baby needs to come out or it will die.

And they would’ve broken their promise to Lori.

Bella’s hand moves before her brain can even notice. Her blade is drawn, and it cuts into Lori’s flesh.

The mother screams in agony as the steel tears her open and the remaining blood in her body floods to the surface.

Maggie can’t contain her shocked cry at the site of Bella leaning over to cut into Lori… a cut that kills her.

“What are you doing to her?!” Carl screams as he leans over his mom, grasping at the woman whose eyes close swiftly as her body goes limp and her last breath drifts from her lungs. 

Bella saws at Lori’s flesh, cutting through the thick muscle over her uterus where the baby rests. Maggie pushes Bella’s shaking hands away and makes her own cuts instead. The woman’s eyes are wide as she stares at the girl who hovers in her spot, her hands are covered in warm and wet blood that drops to stain her clothes. 

“Keep the site clean, okay?” Maggie’s voice tumbles over her words but Bella understands and pulls Lori’s flesh apart, giving way for Maggie to cut deeper. “I cut too deep, I’m gonna cut the baby.” She says more to herself since Bella and Carl are shocked; Bella is frozen and Carl heaves cries over his mother’s head. “Okay… Okay, come on, I see it, I see the ears. I’m gonna pull him out.” Maggie pulls at a limb and cries supporting some part of the baby Bella can’t see. “I can’t tell if this is the arm or the leg. Okay, I’m gonna pull the baby out.” Carl pulls away from his dead mother’s face to look at the baby Maggie pulls from Lori’s corpse.

The baby doesn’t move or cry. It… she lays limp in Maggie’s arms. The woman flips the baby to its stomach and gives light smacks to her back before rubbing circles into the skin. Finally, the baby cries out and everyone gives a sad smile at the noise. 

Carl pulls his flannel off his back to hand off to Maggie; she wraps the baby up after cutting the cord that keeps it connected to Lori’s dead body.

Maggie wobbles to her feet, “We have to go.” She urges the kids. 

The baby would need to be looked over by Hershel and fed soon if they wanted her to survive.

Carl wipes his nose and eyes as he stands, “Well, we can’t just leave her here, she’ll turn.” He calls out. And Maggie tries pulling her gun as she grasps at the baby in the other arm. “No…” Carl stops her, his own gun pulling out of the holster.

His hand grasps weakly at the metal as he stares at Maggie.

She shakes her head at the boy. “Carl…”

“She’s my mom.” Carl tells her.

And Maggie knows she can’t fight so she turns her back and walks towards another door that leads back to the cell block. 

Bella stands next to Carl as he sniffs back tears and tightens his grip on his gun.

He chokes back a cry before his face turns to stone as he gives his mom’s face a final look and pulls the trigger.

Chapter Text

It’s all broken.

They were starting to fix things and now… the shards of their lives they were starting to piece together have turned to dust.

Rick, the man that was an anchor to everyone in the group one way or another, has collapsed to the cement ground. His body racks uncontrollably with tears and hiccups; muddled and incoherent cries slipping through. 

Carl stands still, his body is frozen and muted sadness is drawn across his face. He’s almost emotionless… almost like stone as he looks at his father that wipes at his face with sweat and blood-soaked hands.

And Bella stands near the side, frozen in her own world. She can barely hear Rick’s cries, but they rack her brain painfully in her head, her whole body is heavy and thick. She doesn’t think she can move if she wants; the only thing that moves is her eyes. And they stare at Carl hazily, her body won’t let them focus as if they could with the tears that fall down her cheeks.

Glenn moves in the corner of her eyes towards Maggie, the woman barely contains her own tears. “What happened?” He questions softly as Maggie grips the baby tight in her arms. He moves slowly towards her, afraid that if he moves too fast Maggie will break with the new life in her arms.

Maggie hiccups hard in the back of her throat, which burns hot and painful with held back tears. “I could- I couldn’t,” Glenn’s eyes- everyone’s eyes are wide as they stare at her, their stares begging for explanation. Maggie squeezes her eyes tightly as she sniffles a wet tear back into her throat. Her eyes jump over her shoulders to Bella; the girl barely meets her gaze. “She…” No one needs Maggie to continue, they can figure it out themselves. The way Maggie heaves and clutches at the baby. The way Carl doesn’t look at Bella but makes eye contact with everyone else as Rick jumps to his feet, wraps his hand around an ax and takes off into the prison. Maggie had said where they got stuck when they had gotten out; and that’s where Rick is killing his way to. His cries are gone giving way to the unsettling calmness of the world.

Bella’s hands are stained in drying and wet blood up to her elbows, her right-hand clutches tightly to the blade in her hand which drips slowly with blood. And the skin of her palm is slowly drying to the handle of the blade. She cut into Lori… they all know she did; Maggie’s tears tell them all they need to know.

And the girl doesn’t care as her eyes fall onto Carl, the boy slowly approaches Hershel who looks the baby over. Maggie passes the baby girl to the boy’s awaiting arms, he cradles her carefully and lets Maggie move the baby into the safest position to lay.

Bella doesn’t think Carl will ever let her near the baby… it’s his little sister, she knows that, but- “ I didn’t think you really had the balls to kill someone, ” Shane’s damned voice comes at her, “ let alone Lori. ” Bella’s spine gets dipped in ice, her muscles spasm painfully at the sound of her daddy’s voice and she wants to scream. 

Why after everything did, he has to come now? 

She can see him again, moving in the far sides of her vision. Her hands clench even tighter, her nails cut into the skin of her palms; if she bleeds, she doesn’t notice. “ I’m proud of you, sweetheart. You saved your little sister- ” His face is carved with an unnatural grin.

“No.” The word escapes without her permission.

Her skin dances with goosebumps that force Bella into a shiver. The hairs on her neck stand straight and her eyes can’t see anything, it’s all a blur of dull colors… She's scared.

She’s so scared.

Just like at the CDC.

And when she laid on the forest floor with a shot and bleeding Carl in her arms. 

She’s scared and she hates it so much.

She can feel everyone’s eyes turn to her, but the hottest stare is her daddy that stands to her right, waiting for the perfect time to open his mouth.  “What was that?” Hershel asks looking up from the baby, if Bella could make out the details on his face she would see his concerned eyes. 

Everyone’s concerned eyes.

Her own eyes are wide in fear, face contorted as though she wanted to scream and cry in terror, her shoulders are hunched in and her hands are clenched and shaking as though it could mute the fear in her bones. 

It’s concerning for them all. They’ve never seen the girl with such genuine fear across her face, except when she hovered over a slowly dying Carl at the farm. It’s like she sees a ghost.

And she does… the ghost of her dead daddy that she loved once but now made her scared to even sleep.

Her heart hurts. It pounds so harshly in her chest and clenches like someone is trying to pull it from her chest. Fearful eyes slowly make their way to her right, her vision sharpening with the tears of sadness being replaced for wide fear. 

Her daddy isn’t right when she finally looks at him, his limbs are too long and too short, his nose is all wrong and his smile is too big for his face… her breath hitches over every other one. “Come on, princess! You’re tellin’ me you're not happy?!” The thing pretending to be her daddy asks her, his hands trying to lean on his knees. He’s not real… she knows- I know that…. “Not excited?!” He cheers, arms flinging about wildly. I’m not happy. I’m scared… She thinks in her head as she tries to pull her eyes away from this thing. Shane's eyes narrow at her, grin turning evil. “Lori was whore that couldn’t choose between me and Rick even after I died! She deserved to die,” He hisses with a smile so dark she wants to run and wants to hide under a blanket for protection.

But she shakes her head, the only part of her body that can move. “No, she didn’t,” her voice is strained as she talks.

“Bella?” Daryl calls out.

A voice she can’t really hear. All she hears is her daddy’s wrong voice that drags painfully against her soul.

“ But she did… ” He drawls, as he spins in his place like a circus clown trying to cheer up a little kid. Bella sucks in short and rapid breaths, her head starts to hurt. “ And now, you can kill Rick. And Daryl. And T-Dog. And all the rest that stood by as I was killed. ”

Bella shakes her head, mumbled sounds drifting underneath her daddy’s words, as though she was underwater. “I won’t kill them…” her head shakes so violently side to side she prays that the force of it will get her daddy to leave. “I won’t- you can’t make me,” she hiccups hard, and her shoulders begin to rack.

“ You will! You’re a killer! ” He shouts into her face, his figure moving faster than her eyes can notice. “ You always have been! -” his voice is calm as his hand hovers over her cheek.

The hand doesn’t touch as Bella’s head is ripped to face forward. “Look at me!” Daryl’s hands grip at her cheeks, cradling her head in a hard and grounding grip. The redneck’s face slowly comes into her vision and Bella can’t stop that cry that escapes her voice at his concerned face. “He ain’t real, you understand?” Daryl’s voice and face are full of fear and concern, nothing Bella has ever seen.

And it means nothing when her daddy’s presence hovers over her bones.

The redneck tries to speak but Bella rips herself from his grip, her blade clatters to the ground as she backs away so fast, she slams into the prison’s wall.

Her head bounces off the brick and her knees drop her to the ground. Bella clutches at her head- not in pain but in fear. She tries pulling at her hair and smacking at her skull… hoping the pain will numb her mind; that it will take away all the pain she can’t see.

But it doesn’t.

And she doesn’t know how long she’s left at the side of the prison wall when Beth’s hands slowly come into view. The young girl is careful as she bends down into Bella’s line of sight, her eyes blankly stare at the ground where her head dropped in exhaustion.

And she doesn’t fight as Beth grabs gently at her shoulders and pulls her to her feet. I don’t like being touched , Bella thinks… but she can’t fight as her exhausted body falls into Beth’s side. The blonde supports the younger girl up the stairs and towards the back of the cell block. 

Bella doesn’t know where they're going… or really care. She just hopes she can be left alone.

And she is.

Once Beth led her to the communal showers, turned on a shower head for some lukewarm water to burst from the pipes, and left before telling her to clean up and shout if she needed help.

Bella doesn’t know if she responds. But she does grip at her clothes, pulling the large and baggy pieces off her body. She doesn’t know where the energy comes from, but she knows that the action exhausted her even more.

Her body falls to the tiled floor with zero coordination. Her limbs are sickly thin, her veins forming spider webs underneath her skin; she doesn’t care.

She merely pulls her knees underneath her chin and grips at her legs, the spray of the shower head falls harshly onto her skin that is ablaze with sensitivity. 

Bella begs her eyes to go unfocused once more, for her head to drift away from her body… but it doesn’t happen, not when her eyes are stuck on the still dried blood on her arms. The cooling water smacks harshly, pulling away red from her arms but the flakes stand strong. 

So, she rips away at the flakes with her bit down nails. She can barely feel herself scratch away at the blood… she can’t feel the blood disappear and she can't feel herself start to scratch into her own skin. 

Her hands move in harsh tandem as she claws at her arms, up and down from her wrists to her shoulders. Scratching and tearing at her skin, trying to remove everything…

“ One kill and you have cold feet. ” Shane’s voice bounces against the tiled walls, forcing her vision to clear and the haze that is stuck in her mind to dissipate. Her stomach turns and she wants to throw up the little morsels of food that are in her stomach. “ Here you are… shivering with guilt. Lori was going to die anyway! ” He tells her… as if I don’t know that . But that doesn’t matter- it doesn’t because she killed Carl’s mom.  “ And you saved your baby sister, ” He tacks on drawing her from her thoughts.