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untouchable

Summary:

Remember those knuckle dusters in that MJ stealth mission in the art museum place? Well, I do. Here's how it happened.

Day 16 of Whumptober 2023: Alternative Prompt: Brass Knuckles

Notes:

Or rather, here's how it could have happened.

Work Text:

The punch would shatter anyone else's jaw.

"Holy shit," is all Spider-Man gets out, mangled as it is from the blood from his tongue and gums. Still staggering, he just about manages to miss the next punch his senses warn him about, then he flees back to the ceiling with a quick web up. He touches his jaw gingerly, impressed that it isn't broken, but also can't help but wonder if that's more luck or durability. Another punch? Yeah, that would break it for sure, and how's he going to explain that to his aunt?

Fisk glares up at him from the ceiling. Lucky he'd webbed away his gun at the start.

"This is the problem with vigilantes," the big guy growls. "You burst in, not a care in the world for the—"

"Save the capitalist saviour speech, tubs," Spidey interrupts. "Seriously, you're not winning me over, I'm not buying stocks in whatever business is fronting all your ill-gotten goods or whatever it is you do."

"Leave my office," Fisk orders. "I could have you on assault charges."

"Buddy, you just punched me in the face with knuckle dusters. I could have you on assault charges." Except that's not quite how it'd work, because he has to admit Spidey breaks jaw after breaking and entering law-abiding citizen's private offices doesn't sound great. The Bugle would love to spin it that way.

"Breaking and entering, aggravated assault, vandalism," Fisk lists off.

Spider-Man massages his jaw. "Knuckle dusters," he reminds him. "You're not the Maggia. Are you?" He peers at him. "You going full Italian mobster, plodfather?"

"Leave!" Fisk bellows.

"Okay, okay, I'm leaving. But I've got my eye on you!"

The next few actions have to be executed with pure precision. First, he detaches from the ceiling, flipping down and landing on his feet. The tingle starts before he even sees Fisk moves, but he was prepared for it anyway, so he jumps again, twisting to the side but reaching out for one of Fisk's shoulders as the brute rampages past him. The fist pulled back behind said shoulder gets grabbed by his free hand. It's not hard to prise Fisk's fingers open, though he struggles to get the brass knuckles off of him anyway, especially because by that point his run has come from a stop and Fisk is trying to shake him off or slam him into the wall. Or both, he realises, as he takes the weapon off of him and releases his shoulder, using his foot to kick Fisk into the wall.

"Thanks for this! Count on me to not visit you in jail!" He thwips out of there before he can get anything more than the echo of his roar in his ear.

Once he's a safe distance from the building, Spidey calls Yuri. "Hey, so, I've got evidence against Fisk."

"What?" Yuri says. "Seriously?"

"He just tried to pulverise my face with knuckle dusters. That's, like, got to be top of the list of weapons only mobsters have, right?"

"Did he assault anyone else with them?"

"Uh, no."

"Do you have any reason to believe he might have committed a crime while wearing them?"

"It's. Uh. He punched me with them."

"In the face, and you're still talking. It's—"

"Hey, I have a very thick skull."

"—really hard to prove he's done anything wrong when it's just your word against him."

Spider-Man sighs. "So I've just stolen this for no reason?"

"... Please tell me you didn't."

"You keep telling me we need evidence against him!"

He can feel Yuri's long-suffering sigh. "Let me guess. You broke into his apartment – again – and started a fight with him?"

"I mean... Yes and no. I broke into his offices and we fought. I didn't start the fight."

"But you're a vigilante, and he's an apparently upstanding citizen of New York. It's his word against yours. Again."

"Look, the first time—"

"Wasn't even the first time," she points out. "We can't use it. Not even if it has your blood on it."

"Well... Now what do we do?"

"Wait until we catch him doing something we can convict. Stop picking fights with him, it doesn't help your case."

"You act like I don't have the best lawyer in the whole of New York," he mutters.

"I'm serious. If Fisk manages to build a case against you before we have one against him..." She lets that idea hang.

"Okay, okay, I get it. My word against his and he already has half the media in the city on side," Spidey sighs. "Man, why can't criminals just be straight-up criminals anymore?" He rests his head back against the wall, all the pain in his jaw competing for attention with his crushed optimism.

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