Chapter Text
Donna Paulsen was glaring at Harvey through the glass. He’d been typing away happily on his computer, not once checking his phone. Under any normal circumstances, it would be fine. But since the day he got Lucy, he barely came into work and insisted on being with her 24/7. Now he was planning on staying at work the whole day and wasn’t trying to check up on her? Something was up, and Donna was going to figure it out. She suspected it had to do with the “little thing” Harvey mentioned the day before, when he explained how he met this random guy at the store and decided to do a test run on him. Clearly, it was going well, but Donna didn’t want to take any risks. She centered herself, took a sip of her coffee, stood up, and then entered Harvey’s office. He didn’t look up.
“Harvey,” Donna said as her heels clicked on the floor and she found herself standing in front of his desk. She could see from the reflection of the windows behind Harvey that he was actually working, not just faking it. She examined the scene further and noticed a business card slightly hidden under some folders. Without hesitation, she plucked it from the desk and read it.
“Put that back,” Harvey instructed, finally looking up.
Donna raised an eyebrow and handed the card back. “Mike Ross, huh? He sounds young."
Harvey rolled his eyes and scoffed. “He’s good; trust me. I wouldn’t leave Lucy with anything less."
“You didn’t deny it,” Donna noted, a small smile pulling at her lips. It was clear Harvey trusted Mike, but why was that? He’d only met Mike yesterday, yet he was willing to put his daughter’s life in his hands. “Have you run a background check on him yet?"
“I don’t need to,” Harvey responded, exasperated. He pushed his chair away from his desk and stood up, wiping down his suit. “Donna, please. You can meet him once I know it’s permanent."
“Permanent?” Donna questioned. Nothing in Harvey’s life was permanent except for his job, Donna, and now Lucy. Adding a stranger to that list seemed almost insulting to the rest of it.
Harvey eyed Donna apologetically. “I promise I’ll give you more information, but right now..."
"You don’t have any more information,” Donna finished, shocked. Harvey barely knew anything about Mike Ross but still hired him. “I’m worried this is your way of retreating into your shell, and you’re trying to hire the first person that’ll take the pressure off your plate."
“I would never do that to Lucy,” Harvey insisted. “Here, I’ll call him right now if it’ll make you feel better.”’
“Please, do,” Donna smiled. Harvey once again rolled his eyes but had a fond expression on his face. He knew that Lucy had the two of them wrapped around her finger. He pulled out his phone and clicked on a contact name that read as ‘Mike (sitter)’.
“ Hello? Harvey? ” The voice answered, clearly confused and concerned.
“Hey Mike,” Harvey responded casually, catching Donna’s eye with a smirk. “Remember Donna from yesterday?”
“ ... Yes? ”
“That’s me,” Donna interjected. She was interested in what Harvey told Mike about her, and she wanted to know why he even bothered. “So Harvey told you about me?”
Harvey let out a short laugh, “No, quite the opposite, Donna. He figured out about you.”
Donna raised an eyebrow. “Did he?”
“ Harvey, is everything okay? Are you just checking in on Lucy? ” Mike moved on.
“Everything is fine. I’m just trying to please my secretary.”
“ Okay? I’m going to act like that’s not weird-- Oh, also, Harvey, someone knocked on the door for you. ”
Harvey heard that an immediately took the phone off speaker and brought it to his ear. “Who was it? What did they want?”
“ She said her name was Jessica. She wanted to ‘check’ in on Lucy, but I didn’t let her inside. I hope that’s alright… ”
“Jesus,” Harvey muttered. “That’s my boss, Jessica Pearson. I’m surprised you didn’t recognize her from the photos.”
“ Oh, I’m sorry. I… I had a long night and morning. Sorry. ” Mike sounded tired and almost scared, making Harvey regret putting a rough edge to his voice.
“It’s okay, Mike. Nothing you should’ve known. You handled it perfectly. I can talk to Jessica today and explain to her the situation,” Harvey assured him. “She heard about Lucy and wanted to make sure I wasn’t neglecting her.”
“ Good, ” Mike replied distractedly. He’d spent the night at Harvey’s the previous evening; Harvey not feeling well enough to send him on his own after the mess. When Harvey woke up to go to work, Mike was already up and preparing coffee. He didn’t remember getting a good look at him, but looking back he definitely looked tired and worn out. Maybe Harvey shouldn’t stay the full day…
“Are you okay, Mike?” Harvey asked before he could stop himself. “You sound tired, and I’m thinking if I should come home early.”
“ No, don’t. I’m okay, I promise. You’re paying me for a reason, and if I can’t take care of Lucy after losing some hours of sleep, what good of a babysitter am I? ” Mike said it hurriedly, but it didn’t sound like he believed it.
“You’re a great babysitter,” Harvey replied plainly. “But after last night, I should’ve known you would be tired. I should be out of work by two, if that works for you."
It was silent on the other end before Harvey heard a deep intake. “ Thank you, Harvey. I’m sorry again. "
Harvey was about to say something else when he saw movement outside of his office, and both he and Donna looked up to see Jessica Pearson staring them down. Donna left his office quickly and gave a brief nod to Jessica as she entered.
“Listen, Mike,” Harvey started. “I’ll be there at two twenty; try not to kill yourself until then.” Without waiting for a response, he hung up and flashed a bright smile.
“So that was the kid?” Jessica asked, although she knew the answer. She took a stance in front of Harvey’s office like she owned the place, which she did.
“Did you really visit my apartment?” Harvey said, ignoring the question. He knew it was mostly rhetorical. “I have everything handled; in case you forgot, I’m the best lawyer you’ve got, and I would never leave Lucy in incapable hands."
Jessica rolled her eyes, and she too picked up the piece of paper that had Mike’s name on it.
“He seems nice,” she said, her voice trailing like she knew something Harvey didn’t, which he always hated.
“Don’t tell me you have an issue with Mike; he’s a sweetheart,” Harvey teased. He wasn’t lying; Mike really was amazing. He’d clearly been hurt in the past, and he was trying to overcome that, but something about it made Harvey protective over him.
“Smart, too,” Jessica added. At Harvey’s confused look, she laughed. “Unbelievable. You’re telling me that you didn’t do a background check on him?"
“Yet,” Harvey mumbled. That was twice he’d been railed on for not checking out Mike’s background, but he didn’t see the problem. All he needed to know had already been provided to him by Mike, and it wasn’t like Mike was lying. “How do you know he’s smart?"
“He didn’t let me into your apartment,” Jessica said for one. “But that’s common sense, so at least Michael isn’t a blubbering idiot. He might’ve been a good asset to the firm if the times crossed right."
Harvey perked up at that. “What do you mean?"
Jessica shook her head. “This is why you need to do checks. I recognized his face, and so I looked him up. It turns out that Michael Ross applied to be an intern at this firm a couple years ago. His offer was denied, of course, because he hadn’t graduated from Harvard."
“Mike went to law school?” Harvey asked more to himself. He never would’ve suspected, although he supposes he was selling Mike short. He barely knew him and had no right to assume his intellectual background.
“No,” Jessica replied. “He didn’t go to any universities."
That confused Harvey even more. “What made him think he could get a job at a law firm then?”
“Because he passed the bar with high marks. It was quite impressive,” Jessica explained, admiration clear in her voice, but her face remained passive. Interesting. There had to be a reason Jessica was telling Harvey this, but why? She didn’t exactly sound disapproving of him for hiring Mike, but she seemed hesitant. She acted exactly how Harvey should’ve acted last night, but instead he was completely trusting of Mike and didn’t ask him any questions.
That’s when Harvey realized he’d been blinded by Mike’s vulnerability and soft face. Even though he doubted Mike had any ill intention, he still should’ve investigated further and asked more questions explaining Mike’s behavior. How could he be so trusting of a stranger? He was a father now; he couldn’t risk bestowing trust on the wrong person.
“Harvey,” Jessica said, shaking Harvey out of his thoughts. He looked up at her. “Go. The firm can afford another day without the ‘Great Harvey Specter’.” Harvey could’ve kissed her if he wasn’t already out of his seat, packing up. While Jessica was a hardass during cases and work, when needed, she had a heart and was understanding of difficult situations. She’d been more than accommodating for Harvey when he discovered he had Lucy, and if that didn’t make him love his job even more, what could?
When Harvey got to his apartment and unlocked the door, he opened it to find Mike laying on the couch, his back away from Harvey, meaning he had a pretty good view of the window past the TV. He wasn’t on his phone or watching anything, but just staring off. It concerned Harvey a little. He took a few steps before spotting a little bed beside the couch. He had no idea where it came from, but Lucy was sleeping steadily on it, covered with a pink blanket and a teddy bear. Harvey didn’t want to interrupt either of their peacefulness, but he’d gone long enough in the dark. He cleared his throat, and Mike almost jumped up from the couch. He stared up at Harvey like he didn’t quite know who he was before his eyes focused, and he smiled awkwardly.
“Hey, Harvey,” he said. “What’re you doing here? It’s only... eleven?"
“Sorry about that,” Harvey said as he stepped more into the apartment. “I came to the revelation while at work that I know nothing about you. I don’t know your background; I don’t know your previous jobs; I don’t know your work experience; I don’t even know if you have friends or family.” He said this all calmly, but on the inside, he was freaking out. The more he listed that he had no idea about, the more he realized how ludicrous the whole situation was.
As he spoke, Mike seemed to dim and shrink down into himself, which wasn’t his intention at all. If anything, he just wanted to help him understand. “You’re right,” Mike nodded. “It was crazy for me to think this would work. You don’t even have to pay for me today; I’ll just go.
“Hold on!" Harvey intervened as Mike stood up. “That’s not what I’m saying at all. I want this to work, Mike, and I think you do too. But it can’t work without trust, and right now, we have very little of that."
Mike still looked like he didn’t understand.
“Sit down at the table, and I’ll explain everything. How long has Lucy been asleep?"
“Only half an hour,” Mike answered. “But toddlers her age should be getting at least an hour of naptime."
Harvey nodded. “Great. We can let her sleep a little more while we discuss this.” The two sat down at the dining table beside each other.
“What do you want to know?” Mike said it hesitantly.
“Last night.” Mike tensed. “You were stuck in some sort of memory or traumatic experience. I don’t want that to happen again, so how can I avoid triggering that other than not slapping you around?"
The way that Mike’s face softened and his eyes brightened made Harvey’s heart ache for him even more. Even the possibility of someone wanting to help Mike was foreign to him, and Harvey suddenly felt angry at whoever had hurt him in the past.
“I--” Mike stopped himself, his face reddening. “God, this is embarrassing. Um, yelling really freaks me out, especially if I don’t know why someone’s yelling. Touching is another big thing. If I can see you coming, sometimes I can deal with it, but if I can’t see you, I freak out."
Harvey took in that information and stored it away. It made sense so far—all things that were normally triggers for abuse victims. He did have something he wanted to ask: “When I rubbed your back, you flinched at first, but then you relaxed into it. Is that something that you don’t like?"
Mike shrugged. “It depends. I don’t know why I was fine with you doing it last night; normally, I don’t let anyone touch me, even if they are trying to comfort me.” He let out a wet laugh. “I guess you’re special."
“Yeah,” Harvey said softly, reflecting back on what Mike was telling him. “I guess I am.” Mike was already so trusting of Harvey that he felt silly for ever doubting Mike’s integrity.
“Anything else?” Mike asked, moving past the brief moment.
“You don’t need to tell me everything, especially if you’re not ready, but I need some context. I’ll take anything—the smallest amount of information you’re willing to give,” Harvey probed. He knew he had to be gentle about it, but he had to make sure Mike knew why he was asking. He wasn’t trying to be an asshole and bring back bad memories, but he wanted to make sure Mike wasn’t in danger.
“Okay… I just want to let you know what I did and what happened. I’m done with that. I have been for two years; you don’t have to worry about me bringing my issues to Lucy and you,” Mike assured Harvey. “When I was seventeen, I started selling myself for money."
Harvey suspected as much, but it still stung a little. He thought about Lucy, and even though he’d only known her for a few days, he couldn’t imagine his little girl growing up and thinking she needed to prostitute herself for money. He would never let her get to that.
“My parents died when I was eleven, and my grandmother took me in,” Mike continued. “Obviously, as a senior citizen, she didn’t make much, and even though the government was giving her money, it wasn't enough. I didn’t have money to go to college or buy extra things like fancy clothes or a car. So, my friend, Trevor, convinced me I could make a lot of money selling myself."
This was the second time that Mike had mentioned Trevor, and both times Harvey didn’t like him. But the fact that Mike’s 'so-called friend' would pressure him into that made him feel sick.
“It worked for a while,” Mike said with a bitter laugh. “I was actually making enough to get a new bike and some gifts for Grandma, but eventually... It all went downhill." He got lost in thought for a little, and his eyes glazed over again.
“Mike,” Harvey said gently, nudging the younger man’s knee with his own. “You don’t have to keep going.” Mike shook himself out of his stupor, and he looked down at his hands on the table.
“You know you don’t have to deal with me,” Mike said quietly. Harvey was a little disappointed that he didn’t continue, but he couldn’t blame him.
“What do you mean?”
“You don’t have to hire me as your babysitter. Clearly, I’ve been pretty lousy at it so far, but you're also investing all this emotional time into me that you shouldn’t have to. I can refer you to a dozen better sitters for Lucy that’ll do just as well as me,” Mike said. He met Harvey’s eyes with an earnest look. “‘I’m serious. I won’t take offense if you want a more stable individual watching over your kid; in fact, if it didn’t hurt my case, I would suggest it."
Harvey debated the suggestion for only a second before he shook his head. He impulsively took Mike’s hand, which later he would regret, and squeezed it gently. “I’m going through a tough time right now, and you are too. I think we could benefit from having each other, if you’re okay with that.
Mike took a few seconds to stare at their joined hands before squeezing back and smiling—a real smile this time. “You have no idea how much I need that. Thank you, Harvey, seriously, man.”
"Great!" Harvey exclaimed. He let go of Mike’s hand and tried to ignore how cold he felt after. “Let’s wake Lucy up and try to figure this out together. I have until tomorrow morning at ten ‘til I have to go back to work. Think we can plan something out before that?"
“Sure,” Mike replied. Harvey stood up from his seat and went over to Lucy, gently picking her up while waking her up in the process. As he stared into her eyes and examined her face, he tried to ignore the stare he could feel from behind him. Eventually, he couldn't, and he turned around, finding Mike staring at him with a soft smile. “You’re a great father,” Mike said.
Harvey felt a sudden feeling of warmth in his stomach, but he wrote it off as being happy he had Lucy in his sights again. There was no way Mike’s words of affirmation did that. No way.