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Poe woke up slowly, muscles feeling like he was wading through sludge. His head was pounding and the moment he sat up, he wished he hadn’t.
The room spun in front of him and he slumped back down, groaning audibly. He immediately clamped his mouth shut as he twisted to the side, expecting to see Finn laying beside. By some miracle he was absent, the covers cool where he had once laid. That wasn’t exactly unusual considering that Finn had never been able to truly shake the rigidity of times and structure that the First Order had taught him. He was always up before dawn either on a run or a walk around Base, just to make sure everything was as it should be.
“Wish I could do that,” Poe muttered softly. Then again, the night before he had hit it a little heavy with his fellow pilots and didn’t even remember what time he had stumbled in. He remembered Finn’s warm, inviting arms around him, holding him close, but other than that everything was a blur.
He rolled back onto his side and tried again to sit up. He hoped that if he took it slower, it may not feel like his skull was tearing from his head.
The action sent him almost staggering forward as black spots danced in front of his vision. Hands came up to rub hard at his eyes until splotches of color shone. When he pulled his hands away, the dizziness remained. It wasn’t enough to cause him to fall, just make everything seem a little unsteady around him.
Poe gave his head a massive shake. “Pull yourself together, damnit! You did this to yourself, now get on with it.”
His harsh muttering brought BB-8, who had been charging in the corner, rolling over. He beeped quizzically as he rolled around the foot of the bed, dome swiveling as he scanned Poe.
“Hey, buddy,” Poe murmured as he motioned BB-8 close. He pressed his head to BB-8’s dome, savoring the coolness he felt there.
BB-8 gave another low chirp of worry.
“I’m alright, I promise. Just feeling the effects of last night is all,” he assured as he drew back, but not before resting a hand on BB-8’s side. “Why don’t you go and see what D-O is up to? He may still need some help navigating around.”
That may have been half true. The little droid was still as nervous as ever and relished being anywhere BB-8 was, though he was getting around easier. Part of Poe just needed BB-8 to project his worry on someone other than himself.
BB-8 drew back, more than reluctant to leave no matter what Poe told him. Torn between duty and concern, BB-8 rolled to the center of the room and stopped expectantly.
Poe couldn’t help but chuckle. Whoever said droid’s were incapable of emotions had clearly never met a BB unit.
“Bee, I‘ll be fine. The only thing on my agenda is to go over the expansion plan with Finn. No flying.”
BB-8 was still clearly reluctant, though Poe guessed he wanted to be as obedient as he could. That was his foremost programming, and no matter how much leeway Poe usually gave him, he would listen more often than not. There was no doubt in Poe’s mind that he would be back sooner rather in later, possibly with someone else or D-O in tow to keep a watchful presence over Poe.
After BB-8 finally rolled away, Poe drew a hand over his face. His fingers sprawled and he began to quake. Poe dropped his hand to examine them and saw that he was trembling. A shiver rushed down his spine and he instantly reached for a shirt that had been discarded late that evening.
He gave it a brief smell test and found the familiar cologne comforting. Finn was the only person he knew who wore it and reveled as he pulled the soft material over his head and pulled his arms through the sleeves. It was looser on him than it would’ve been on Finn, but Poe hardly minded. Anything that reminded him of Finn was fine in his book.
Finn!
Poe heaved a heavy sigh, preparing himself to stand. The dizziness had faded only slightly, and he feared what may happen when he attempted to stand.
“Take it slow. Half the battle is with the mind.” He recalled Rey saying something similar to that once. Now he wished he may have actually listened instead of nodding along.
Poe planted his feet heavily and leveraged himself on either side with his arms locked against the edge of the bed. He pushed off and held his breath as he managed to hover for a moment. Exhilaration rushed through him as he focused on the door, chin turned upwards in pride.
Perhaps things wouldn’t be so bad.
Feeling overzealous, Poe took a step only to find the room spinning. He tried to reach back, to lean against the bed to catch himself. However, his hand ripped through thin air, knees buckling as he drifted backwards.
His skull smashed on the corner of the bed as stars burst in front of his vision. The edge of the bed slowed the remainder of his descent until he was slumped on a heap on the ground, hissing in pain as everything continued to shift and blur despite his best attempts at focusing.
Whatever dizziness he had felt before multiplied. Poe feared he couldn’t even bring himself to raise his head, let alone pull himself off the floor. He closed his eyes tightly, yet the vertigo continued as he lost all sense of balance as well as what was up or down. It felt as though he was spinning while also knowing that he was laying still.
“Stop. Stop,” he begged, the pounding behind his eyes only increasing. He felt bile rise in his throat as he pulled his knees close to his chest while he breathed hard. Everything felt too difficult to attempt and he was left paralyzed by the sickening feeling overtaking him.
“Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no.”
Poe’s ears had never heard a sweeter sound than the jittery, yet familiar voice. Normally he would grumble about it always being underfoot, but now he could only think of relief.
The sound of metal on floor echoed as a wheel spun. Poe felt something cool press against his cheek and nudge his head up a few centimeters.
“D-O,” Poe ground out as he jerked away from the touch. The meager movement sent daggers through his brain and it took all of his power not to scream. The last thing he needed was to scare his best shot of helping him away.
“Sorry! Sorry! No thank you,” D-O exclaimed nervously.
His shrill cry made Poe’s headache worse. However, he managed to breathe through it. “M’okay, buddy. Listen, can you get BB-8 or Finn for me?”
“B-B-B-B-8?”
‘Don’t lash out. Don’t lash out.’ Despite the mantra that now played in Poe’s mind, it was difficult for him to hold his tongue. Shouldn’t seeing him sprawled on the floor clue him in that something was wrong?
“Or Finn. Just get some one, will ya?”
D-O seemed petrified a moment long before leaning forward. “Help. Help! No thank you!” He turned almost instantly and rushed out of the room without another sound.
Poe’s shoulders slumped as the time ticked by. He was beginning to think that he was going to be stuck here until whatever this was passed, or Finn came back later that evening for a turn in the ‘fresher. Could he really hold out that long waiting?
“No thank you. Pilot. Not thank you. Fallen. Scary.”
Poe’s head twisted against the floor as he heard D-O’s voice. As well as the clank of metal rolling, he heard soft bootsteps plodding after him. A moment of alarm pulsed through Poe as he realized just how pathetic he looked, but there wasn’t anything he could do about it. That was how he got into this predicament in the first place.
Once the door opened, D-O rolled forward and skidded to a halt at Poe’s side. “P-Pilot. Down.”
“Poe,” the worried voice of Finn sounded as he kneeled beside him, shooing D-O away. “What happened?”
Poe closed his eyes tightly as Finn grasped him by the shoulder. He made an attempt to lift him only for Poe to whimper. “Wait! Wait! My head.”
“Did you hit it?” Finn set Poe back down lightly. His fingers threaded over Poe’s skull as delicately as possible, spreading outwards to check for injury. “I don’t feel anything major.”
“Hit it on the way down, but I only did that because I got so dizzy. Guess I may have went a little heavy last night,” Poe confessed with an innocent look to Finn.
While he half expected Finn to agree, or scold him for his wild night, Finn pursed his lips in worry. “You’re warm. Something tells me this isn’t a hangover.”
Poe felt almost relieved by that admission. He had a valid reason for feeling this terrible other than his own poor choices. Still, that didn’t help with his headache and vertigo. Moving in anyway had him almost shuddering, something that Finn noticed nearly right away.
“Poe, you’re shaking.” Finn trailed his fingers down Poe’s neck. “I know you don’t want to, but I need to get you up no the bed and have a better look at you.”
There wasn’t much Poe could say to argue when he knew Finn was right. With a massive sigh, Poe curled forward into Finn’s grasp as his boyfriend’s bicep curled around him to keep his head steady. He used his own weakened arms to secure himself to Finn, even as it was Finn who was doing nearly all of the work. Poe longed to be more helpful, though he doubted anything that he did would be much use.
Finn’s face pressed against the crook of Poe’s neck as he bunched his legs from under him, ready for the final push. “I got you. I got you. Tell me if you need to stop.”
Determination surged through him. “I’m fine,” he ground out.
Finn took Poe’s words and ran with it, swiftly pulling Poe upwards and deposited him on the edge of the bed. Poe struggled not to yelp as the room spun around him. It took everything inside of him not to pass out as he breathed heavily through the starting agony.
“Do you want to sit up or lay back?”
“Lay back,” Poe rasped. “Don’t think I’ll make it sitting up.”
Despite the seriousness of the situation, a glimmer of amusement shone in Finn’s gaze. “So dramatic. You can’t be that far gone.” He pressed a light kiss to Poe’s fevered brow before he helped him lean back. Poe breathed heavily until he was finally settled, eyes closed, yet he could still feel as though everything was tipping dangerously forward.
Before Finn could utter a single worry, Poe lifted his left hand. “I’m not dead, in case you were worrying. You’re still going to be a Co-General with me.”
“That’s not funny, Poe.”
“I know, I know. It just gives me something else to think about besides the pounding in my kriffing head.”
Finn’s shoulders slumped as he reached out to pat Poe’s knee. “Let me get some Bacta wraps. I think we still have some in the ‘fresher.”
While Finn sped off in the opposite direction, Poe could hear D-O’s familiar rolling sound as he drew close to the bed, before retreating just as quickly. He kept it up for a few times until he ended up staying close, the nervousness that he exhumed heavy in the room.
Stifling a sigh, Poe draped his arm over the side of the bed and rested his had on D-O’s cone. At first the droid shied away before relaxing into the touch. He moved his cone just enough that it reminded Poe of petting a cat. D-O had never been this affectionate with him before, and he suddenly wondered if maybe he really was dying if the droid was going to magically get over all fear of him.
“Helped?”
Poe cracked a small smile. “Yeah, buddy, you helped.”
D-O lifted his cone proudly, yet he still didn’t leave Poe’s side.
“D, can you give us a little space,” Finn requested as he headed back with a few strips of bacta in his hands.
“He’s fine, Finn,” Poe interrupted quickly before the little droid could roll away. “In fact, I was just beginning to enjoy his company.”
Finn looked at his boyfriend baffled. “Maybe this is worse than I thought? You know he’s not BB-8, don’t you?”
As funny as it would’ve been to go along with what Finn thought was going on, he couldn’t lie about it. “I know. Just he’s not hurting anyone. Might as well let him hang around.”
Finn shook his head to clear it as he peeled the strips of bacta free and began to spread it along the back of Poe’s neck as well as up the length of his skull. Poe was about to make a joke about messing up his hair, but he doubted that Finn would find that amusing in the slightest.
“How does that feel,” Finn questioned as he eyed Poe warily.
Poe shrugged. “Still hurts but at least I don’t feel like my brain is going to melt out of my ears.” He lifted his hand from D-O and brushed it against the side of his face. “What the hell is wrong with me?”
“I don’t know, but we should have you looked at. Maybe some scans or blood tests. But you haven’t been off world in a couple rotations.” The more Finn spoke, the more worked up be became. His hands wrung together as he sat on the edge of the bed by Poe’s legs. “I should take you in now or have them do a visit and—“
“Sweetheart,” Poe began as he noticed Finn begin to spiral. “Let’s see what the bacta does. I already feel a lot better now that I’m not on the floor.”
“Poe.”
“Finn.” Poe reached up wildly until his fingers brushed against the side of Finn’s face. “Please, can you just lay with me for a bit and we’ll see how I feel?”
Finn looked like he wanted to argue, like he wanted to insist Poe see someone, but when he looked into his lover’s cracked open eyes, his heart melted. He would do anything Poe asked of him at anytime, even if it meant going against his own instincts. No matter what he thought or felt, Poe would always come first and he could melt him with one of those cheeky grins anytime.
“Alright.” Finn reached down and pulled off his shirt that he wore for most debriefings and tossed it aside. He then crawled up to Poe’s other side, closest to the wall and slumped beside him. He draped an arm around his waist and leg around his middle, holding him close. “This alright?”
Poe’s head fell to the left, rested firmly on Finn’s shoulder. “This is perfect. Never move.”
Finn snorted in amusement. “I can’t promise that, but I will tell you that I’ll be here for you as long as time will allow me.”
Poe’s eyes closed in bliss instead of pain for the first time that day. That may have been the most romantic thing that Finn had ever said to him, and not for the first time, Poe was beyond thankful that their paths had crossed. He didn’t know where he would be without Finn, but he did know that was a reality he never wanted to be apart of.