Work Text:
Jin
Ring ring
“Hello?”
“Hyung, would you still love me if I was a worm?”
“What? A worm? Yah! Why are you asking me this? Did you turn into a worm? On a Tuesday?”
Not yet, but Namjoon felt like he was about to. Or maybe he was going to pass out. He’d been awake for almost three full days. He had only been able to squeeze in a nap or two here and there, mainly in Yoongi’s studio, between meetings.
He’d been thinking a lot about that TikTok trend where partners ask each other if they would still love them as worms. They wanted to hear how their partners would build homes out of popsicle sticks for them and line their pockets with dirt for the wiggly love to be more comfortable, but Namjoon kept thinking about what they were really asking.
He didn’t strictly relate to the fear of a partner leaving. He’d gone down his own rabbit hole in his head and somehow come out wondering if being the leader of BTS was the only thing that made him himself. If that made the people around him love him. So, after the anxiety and sleep deprivation became a little bit too influential, he started calling them.
“Hyung, if I turned into a worm. Would you still love me?”
“What.”
Namjoon felt a knot form in his stomach. A worm? Why would his hyung want to waste his time on a hypothetical situation from social media? This was stupid. Why did he keep wasting time? Why couldn’t he just focus on getting his work done rather than being stuck in his head, bothering his members?
After Jin didn’t get a response right away, he realized something was wrong. He’d been worried about Namjoon. The stress of upcoming promotions and releases always landed more heavily on Namjoon, but usually, the members were better at staying on top of it. When Namjoon didn’t come to the dinner table that night, to his horror, Jin realized that no one had seen Namjoon outside the studio in the past few days. That was hours ago, but he doubted Namjoon knew it was almost midnight.
“Are you still at the studio? This late?” Jin didn’t sound tired, but the concern in his voice still made Namjoon cringe.
“Yeah, it’s ok, hyung. Never mind, it was stupid. I’ll see you later.”
“No,” Jin quickly responded before Namjoon could cut the line. “Why doesn’t Hyung come get you? It’s late, Namjoon, you should really be home. With us. Sleeping as a human and not as a worm.”
“Ah hyung, don’t worry about it. Manager-nim is still here with me, I can get a ride back in a few hours. Or crash here or something. Anyways I’ll be fine. Sorry for bugging you hyung.”
Jin knew he wasn’t going to win this right now, and definitely not over that phone, so he redirected back to the current issue at hand.
“First of all, you didn’t bug me; you wormed me.” Namjoon could hear Jin chuckle at his own joke over the phone; it made him smile. “Secondly, you want to know what I’d do if you were a worm?”
Jin took a deep breath. “I’d build you a sandcastle and make you king of the worms. Don’t worry; the other worms won’t want to argue when you have six giants on your side. I’d make sure you have plenty of food because if you’re a worm, then you’re already too skinny. I’d fill your bedroom with dirt so you can still live with us and I’ll drill tiny holes into all the doors and walls so you can get around easier. We’d never stop loving you, even if you were a worm.”
Namjoon didn’t respond right away. For some reason, he hadn’t expected Jin to bring the others into this. He half thought Jin would just say he’d feed him to the fish or use him as bait. Then again, he also expected Jin to tell him he was annoying and hang up on him, so clearly, he wasn’t thinking very well. He was overwhelmed with the confirmation that his hyungs love went beyond work. Which was insane in hindsight because Jin was his hyung.
Namjoon whipped his face on his sleeve, trying to stop the tears that threatened to fall. “Thank you, hyung.”
“Always. Now, come home before I send Yoongi to drag you home.”
“Soon hyung, I promise.”
*Beep*
Hobi
Ring ring ri-
“Namjoonie!” Hoseok’s voice cheerfully greeted his leader. He was hoping Namjoon had called to ask for a ride home, given that it was now past midnight.
Jin had come out of his room earlier and told Hobi and Yoongi about the weird call he got from Namjoon. He didn’t go into details, but he said something about TikTok, sleep deprivation, and Namjoon overthinking things again, which was enough for Hobi and Yoongi to grow concerned.
Namjoon had argued with Jin, saying that since their manager hadn’t left yet, he still had time before another member needed to come and get him. Jin disagreed, but given that he knew their manager wouldn’t be able to stay past 12:30 am without risking the wrath of his wife, he let it slide for now.
“Hi hyung,” Oh no, he sounded sad. Hobi didn’t want to have to burn their whole building down at midnight, but if he had to, he would. “If I was a worm, would you still love me?”
What. This must have been what Jin meant when he said Namjoon was asking nonsense questions. Hoseok thought he meant more along the lines of “Why can’t the sky be orange?” but questioning the member’s love for him was truly nonsensical.
“Oh, my Namjoonie. If you were a worm, I’d keep you in a little box and take you everywhere. Dance practices, speeches, everything. And don’t listen to Jin Hyung, I won’t let him fill your room with dirt. I’ll fill your room with blankets and pillows, and you’ll only dig in the most expensive, high-quality dirt.”
Namjoon smiled as Hosoek continued.
“We’ll make the maknaes carry you around, and if you want something, you can just wiggle in its direction, and we’ll get it for you.”
“What if I’m just trying to go that way?” Namjoon felt like the knot in his throat was finally untying itself. When he had called Hobi, he was once again worried he’d be called annoying and sent away. Of course, Hosoek would never do that to his Namjoonie. Namjoon just forgot for a second.
“You won’t need too! Namjoonie, worms are too small. What if someone stepped on you? We couldn’t have that! No wiggling around, only wiggling to demand things.”
Hobi was laughing on the other line, and it was a sharp contrast to the dark, quiet, cold and empty studio. For a minute, Namjoon debated asking if Hobi would come and get him. He was sure he would, or he’d let Jin Hyung know he was ready (read: willing) to be picked up, and Jin would fly through the window to get to his car faster. Until his computer beeped, signalling that another email came through. He could tell Hobi heard it, too, because the laughter died down in an instant.
“Is manager-nim still there?”
“Yeah, he was going to leave soon. I’ll probably go with him.”
Hoseok’s ears pricked at the word, probably. A ‘probably’ from Namjoon (or Yoongi) usually meant they had a yes or no answer that they knew the others wouldn’t like. He’d give him the benefit of the doubt, but he made a mental note to check when their manager does leave, just in case.
*Beep*
Yoongi
ring ri- *Beep*
His hyung didn’t pick up. It was understandable, given it was now past 1 am, but still. Maybe this was a sign to stop annoying them with his insecurities. Or maybe it was just past 1 am and his hyung was sleeping. Namjoon didn’t get the chance to continue his internal debate on why Yoongi hadn’t answered the call; his studio door swung open, revealing his short hyung, looking not too happy to be there.
“Yoongi hyung? What are you doing here?”
“A better question,” Yoongi starts, and he walks towards Namjoons desk, “is why are YOU still here? Jin hyung specifically told manager-nim not to leave you here.”
“Sorry hyung. I was taking too long. He had to leave.” Namjoon wanted the studio to open up underneath him and swallow him whole. He hadn’t meant to keep bothering his hyungs, and clearly, now he had actually annoyed Yoongi, making him come all the way out here.
Seeing the spiralling thoughts of his dongsaeng, Yoongi pulled Namjoon gently by the hand and led him to the couch in his studio. Looking around the room, it was very clear that Namjoon hadn’t left in days. The trash can was practically overflowing with energy drink cans, something he would have to mention to Jin, the room was messy, cold and dark, and overall just felt sad.
“Why a worm?”
At first, Yoongi thought it was just the trend. Jungkook had mentioned something about the TikToks on his live before, and he figured Namjoon was just tired and remembering half the trend.
“They don’t have arms. Or mouths.”
“You lost me.”
“Would you still love me if I wasn’t my body? Or if I couldn’t do my job or be a good leader? If I couldn’t cook and clean for you, you’d still love me? You’d keep me safe because I mean more to you than that, right?”
Yoongi hummed. He knew it would be something like this. “I wish you would tell us that’s what was happening in your head instead of hiding behind worms.” He gently placed a hand on Namjoon’s chin, guiding his head back up so he could look into Yoongi’s eyes. “You’re not a worm, Joonie. And you don't cook or clean for us now, we do that for you" Yoongi smiled at him, trying to lighten the atmosphere in the sad stuido. "But if the world froze over and you got in a car accident tomorrow and became paralyzed from the neck down, you know we’d sit with you every day, right? If you couldn’t hold up any books, I’d read to you. If you couldn’t write, we’d write for you, and if you couldn’t talk, you wouldn’t need to. We’d take care of you, Joonie; you know why?”
Namjoon held his stare, eyes watering and voice shaky. “Why?”
“Because worm or human, you’re our Joonie. Now stop asking stupid questions and come home. We need to get our Joonie to bed before our Jinnie hyung thinks I’ve decided to stay and comes for both of us.”
Namjoon laughed, realizing now that it was a bit surprising they sent Yoongi to pick him up, given how easily the man joins in on anyone’s projects. Then again, Namjoon spent the last two hours calling his hyungs, asking what they would do if he were a worm, so maybe they knew he wasn’t exactly being productive. Either way, he’s happy to have his hyungs looking out for him.