Chapter Text
The rain's been falling for quite a while now, staining the skirt of her scarlet dress a deep burgundy and absolutely destroying the carefully hairsprayed princess curls that have just barely begun to set.
Sif can practically hear the soundtrack that will play over this moment; something slightly more indie than pop, a little sad, but mostly hopeful; something about a love lost then found, about just knowing when you meet their eyes, about relationships and how quickly they can change. She settles into her character, mentally running through the notes she'd scribbled into her script late last night as she turned this exchange over and over, trying to figure out the perfect formula for this final scene, this last beat of Josie McBride's story.
At this particular moment, she's waded through the anger and embarrassment of watching her ex-boyfriend and his girlfriend be crowned prom king and queen and take their thrones, she's pushed away the humiliation at the way her plans seem to have backfired at every turn, and now she's sitting with her newfound clarity, finding herself rather stuck on the pair of bright, teasing eyes that have followed her all through her junior year.
In truth, they've barely filmed anything yet, so Sif finds herself more imagining than actually remembering the way her scene partner will act, but she's already gotten used to the weight of his eyes on her and she lets that drive Josie's flash of insight and—
"Mind if I sit?"
His voice almost, almost startles her out of her reverie. Her head darts up and she meets the eyes she was just practically daydreaming about with a faint smile and a careless shrug, "It's your porch."
Loki, or really, James, settles next to her, sitting at the very edge of his mark, creating an awkward amount of space between them. She can tell he's nervous with barely a glance and, okay, it is understandable, but it's certainly not ideal. They only met a few months ago and they've barely had anything longer than a five-minute conversation since then, and, to be fair, the first take of this scene was never going to be perfect but Sif was kind of hoping her co-star wouldn't treat her like she's got an infectious disease…and yet.
She's heard nice…well, mostly nice things about Loki from his older brother, Thor— the actor playing her dreamy, airheaded quarterback ex-boyfriend in the movie— about how the boy sitting beside her is witty and brilliant and mischievous, but he'd never said anything about Loki being shy. Although, as she studies him; as Josie studies James, Sif is almost certain that his almost ghostly pale face looks more flushed than it had two minutes ago. If it's an acting choice, it seems to be one he's rather unaware of and if it isn't well…it's interesting is all.
"Are you okay?"
He turns those baby blues on her, his voice almost whisper-soft and hesitant and she's suddenly unbelievably thankful she has the script memorized backwards, forwards, and sideways because while logically, she knows he's asking about the way she just charged out of the prom, the rest of her feels like he's pressed her between microscope slides, studying her down to a cellular level.
Feigned or not, the concern, the anxiety, the longing she sees there is so raw. It hits a nerve and she lets it, lets the intoxicating feeling of realizing you have a massive crush seep through her.
"I…weirdly, yeah. I think I am." She shivers a bit, right on cue, and he nearly drops his umbrella.
"W— would you like my jacket?"
She nods and takes the umbrella from him as he takes his suit jacket off, allowing their hands to brush. Heat rushes up her neck and for a moment she's confused then surprised then happy— believable performances and all that. He drapes it over her shoulders and even though it's just a costume, there's this distinct smell to it, spicy and sharp, and a part of her wants to bury her nose into it. Sif fights the impulse, but flags the thought for later, knowing there's a scene that they have yet to shoot where a grateful Josie wraps James in an impromptu hug— one of the earliest indications of something more happening between the two of them. She wonders if he uses a certain body wash or cologne or if it's just him and then she wonders if it's weird that she's thinking about what her co-star smells like.
For a while they bask in the silence; her watching the gentle rain, him sneaking glances and biting his lip as rolls his sleeves up and gathers his courage. Normally, she's not a fan of the scrutiny of a long, quiet scene, but at this moment, she feels even more anxious than usual. Her heart creeps up to her throat, the overwhelming feeling of having something to hide crashing over her, but she doesn't, this scene is perfectly average, it's just another kiss and yet—
"Was it worth it?" He asks suddenly, finally shifting a bit closer to her side, curious and probing, looking at her like she holds every answer to every question.
"What d'you mean?"
"Josie…" he says with an exasperated roll of his eyes.
"James…" she snipes back.
He sighs, "You spent months trying to get Sam back, you literally hatched a multi-part plan about it only for him to turn around and start dating Liz."
"Okay, first of all we hatched a plan," she rolls her eyes fondly, feeling warm at the way he smirks, "but second of all…I dunno, I guess even though it didn't work it still feels worth it. I got so much more out of all this than I lost, you know?"
"And yet you're sitting out here alone, letting the rain ruin that stunning dress of yours." He may have started out awkward, but she notices, as they fall into the cadence of the scene, their exchange feels natural.
"I'm not alone," she leans into him, bumping their shoulders together, her grip on the umbrella wavering ever so slightly, "you're here."
He scoffs and rolls his eyes in a devil-may-care kind of way that she finds oddly attractive. "I'm nobody; the guy in the chair, behind the scenes, six months ago you wouldn't have even realized I was here at all."
"That's not true!" She shoves him lightly now, her hand brushing across the rapidly goosebumping skin of his forearm, "You may be more subtle than Sam, but you'll always be the know-it-all in my classes murmuring snide little comments to himself that he thinks no one can hear."
"You noticed?"
"'Course I did," she says with a feigned nonchalance and a sideways glance that lingers just a little too long, "you make me laugh."
"Oh…" his mouth drops open and a light fills his eyes and somehow he makes nervously optimistic look more believable than she's ever seen it before, "I…I do?"
"Yeah," her smile turns shy, almost sheepish, meanwhile nerves she's never felt before start writhing in her belly like snakes, an echo of that initial oh my god I have a crush feeling rushing through her, "you always have."
"Jo…"
Before she can anticipate what comes next even though she knows what comes next down to the damn script directions, he's kissing her.
It's clumsy. He's clearly unpracticed and a bit over-eager, but instead of bemoaning the slightly excessive use of tongue or the way his fingers twist in her hair making the damp curls snarl and tangle, she finds it endearing, cute, even. The thought shocks her a bit, but as the umbrella clatters to the ground and rain begins to soak them both, it doesn't go away. She's kissed people before, while acting and in real life, and yet something about this feels…new, an odd spark skitters through her, making her feel all bright and tingly to the tips of her fingers and—
"Cut!"
Loki pulls away lightning quick, and instantly she clocks the way her co-star's usually pale face has gone tomato red.
"Reset! Let's take that again!"
Loki's focus is suddenly pulled to his hands as he fidgets uncomfortably, picking at his button-down and his rolled sleeves while people rush around them. In a few minutes he'll have to go back to his first mark, but for now it would be no use, there are cameras to wheel back across tracks and props to move and so she thinks about the kiss and even more so about Loki's reaction to it.
"Was that your first time?" The question slips out without her thinking and immediately she feels like the worst sort of person for making an assumption that, though she's almost certain is true, is probably something he'd want to keep quiet nonetheless. "Kissing someone, I mean."
"What?" He scoffs with an irritating air of superiority even as his cheeks flush darker, "No, of course not. Was it yours?"
If she couldn't see his face, she almost certainly wouldn't suspect him of lying, but that blush and the little quiver in his voice as says no completely gives him away.
"No," her voice does not waver, and she knows he hears the truth of her confession as he ducks away from her gaze, "but I…I guess I'm just saying, if it happened to be your first kiss, that's okay, I know doing it like this can be really awkward but this was like, definitely better than my first kiss. Not that you're a really good kisser or anything, but…"
Even as she continues speaking, Sif feels like she's been ejected from her body and is watching the scene play out from above, based on Loki's expression of bewilderment, he feels the same way.
"I mean— it's not— you're also not a bad kisser? You were fine, great! Or well, not great but like, you weren't terrible, you— I…"
Unfortunately, for some reason she can't seem to stop and oh gods she wants to evaporate into the late spring heat, but she can't, and why is she still talking? and—
"I should probably just shut up now, huh?"
His eyes narrow dangerously, though it's all tempered by that intense blush he can't seem to will away. Sif finds herself wanting to bury her face in her hands, but just barely restrains herself by thinking of how she would possibly explain to the makeup artist why her eyeliner needs to be completely redone.
"I think that would be wise." Loki says, his voice low.
Usually she's better at this, meeting people, making a first impression, but for some reason she just can’t seem to make herself act like a normally functioning human around Loki and so they sit there in silence, neither willing, or perhaps, able to find any words.
It gets just past the point of enormously uncomfortable when finally, finally a production assistant calls them back to places and Sif is left alone in the rain again.