Chapter Text
[Yesso Island]
When Azula's eyes shut and her body began to fall, Zuko didn't hesitate to run to her side. Did Aang kill her? He felt a small flicker of relief when he saw the dragon's physical traits fade, but to watch her collapse he feared the worse. Ever since he received word of her reappearance he always held a bad feeling.
“What happened?!” Zuko shouted. He dropped to his knees painfully, but the ache in his chest felt worse. He nearly didn't want to see if Azula was dead, so great was his fear. But he forced himself to gingerly lift her.
Azula's face was caked with dirt, sweat and blood. She was completely unrecognizable. He brought shaky fingers to her throat, his heart roared in his ears when he failed to feel the thump of her heartbeat.
“Is she?” He couldn't bring himself to finish his question.
Aang dropped to a knee so he was at eye level with him. Regret was plastered all over his face. But then he shook his head. Zuko felt like he could breathe again.
“No, I didn't kill her.”
As Aang spoke, Zuko caught the sound of approaching footsteps on gravel. Katara threw herself at Aang and hugged him tightly.
“Did you take her bending?” Katara asked as she pulled away from the embrace. When Zuko glanced at her he could see that her eyes were pinched in a worried frown. Even though she bore no liking to Azula, not even she could stand to watch a brother hold a near dead sister in his arms. Her eyes shined with empathetic tears as she took in Zuko's anguish.
“I thought about it, and nearly did. But what Longmu said about Azula's fear of having her bending taken away, I couldn't bring myself to do it.” Aang explained softly. “And it wouldn't have done anything to free Azula from the spirit either. Plus, Azula regained control of herself twice. She could have killed me with her lightning again, but she didn't. I couldn't take her bending.”
“So then what did you do?” Sokka asked. He placed a hand on Zuko's shoulder and gave it a comforting squeeze for a moment before he pulled away.
“I couldn't calm Longmu, the name of the spirit. So I had no choice but to absorb her.”
“What!” Both Water Tribe siblings exclaimed in unison.
“Is that dangerous?” Katara asked. “Will you turn out like Azula?”
Aang shook his head. “No, when I absorbed Longmu, in a way I pacified her. I'm fine.” He stood and looked down at the royal siblings. “But spirit possession takes a toll on a person. We need to get Azula back to the ship.” He turned to Katara, his eyes attracted to the gaping hole in her coat. “Katara! You're hurt!”
She smiled softly and shook her head. She moved a hand to cover the hole of her coat that exposed her abdomen. “I healed myself. I'm fine, sweetie.”
While they spoke, Zuko tried to clean his sister's face of the grime, but blood was still seeping from the two wounds on her forehead where the horns had sprouted.
“Here, let me,” Katara was suddenly on her knees next to Zuko and rested a hand on his, the one wiping at Azula's face. “Wait, my water is gone!” They all–minus Toph–surveyed the area for any remaining snow, but it had all melted from Azula's fire breath.
“Here!” Sokka replied from a distance. He was a few feet away from the group, a new bag and a sheathed sword in his hands. He had found a waterskin from the bag and tossed it to his sister. He then turned his attention to the sword’s scabbard and gasped audibly. “THIS IS MINE!”
Toph headed towards him since she could do nothing while Katara worked on healing Azula. “What is?”
“My space sword! How did Azula get it?”
Zuko ignored his friend, at the moment he was far more concerned with making sure Azula survived so she could explain why she had something that belonged to Sokka. He watched in awe as Katara uncorked the waterskin and bent the water out of it. The water floated out and wrapped around her hands, and then she placed them over Azula's face. There was a soft glow to the water when it touched Azula's skin. It was fascinating to watch the two gaping holes knit together.
Water truly is the opposite of fire. Fire destroys, but water brings life, Zuko thought to himself.
“Can you sit her up? I imagine her back is in the same state.”
Zuko needn't be told twice. He shuddered when he recalled the gruesome manner of how the wings grew out of his sister's back. He lifted Azula into a sitting position and held her shoulders. He realized something different with the hand that supported her back a moment before. He lifted it to inspect it and was greeted with warm, sticky red blood.
With firebending, the flames left burns, it was nearly impossible to leave a person bleeding. Years ago, when Zuko was still hunting the Avatar to restore his honor and he had to break Aang out of a military base, he resorted to using his twin swords. He struck quickly and moved just as fast. Any blood he got on him splattered on his clothes and mask, he wasn't coated in it. To see his own sister's blood coating his hand made him feel slightly queasy.
A low groan from Azula brought him back to the present. He called her name, but she was silent and unmoving again.
“That's about as much as I can do for now.” Katara announced. Then Zuko felt something tingle on his cheek. He looked up and watched Katara pull her hand back. “I healed the scratch on your cheek.”
He thanked her with a soft voice, he owed so much to his friends. If not for them, either more soldiers of his would have died–none would've survived if he sent them in his stead– or if he had pursued Azula on his own then he would've been the one to die. He gathered Azula in his arms as gently as he could and stood on slightly wobbly legs. The adrenaline from the fight was gone from his system and he was left feeling so tired.
“Let's head back then.”
Zuko hadn't noticed until then that the sky was clear, the sun still ascending from beyond the ocean, coloring the sky with yellow, orange and light blue. A faint spec of white was flying above them then began to creep closer.
Appa.
The sky bison recognized their need to leave and landed to allow everyone to climb onto his saddle.
“Hold on tight,” Toph said suddenly. The only warning she gave him until the ground below the Fire Lord extended to get him within stepping distance of Appa's saddle.
“What was he supposed to hold onto?” Sokka asked as he climbed onto the saddle.
Toph shrugged before she followed after him. “The dragon princess for one, couldn't have him frighten and drop her and undo all of Katara’s work.”
“Dragon princess?” Katara asked.
“She grew wings and horns. Do I really need to explain?” Toph sighed. She gripped onto the saddle tightly and waited for them to ascend into the air.
Zuko felt a small smile tug on the corner of his lips. The nickname reminded him of the role Azula laid claim to when they reenacted one of the Fire Nations popular plays: Dragon Emperor.
As they headed back to the ship, Zuko watched Sokka analyze his recovered sword. Strange that Azula would take it for herself, she never had any interest in weapons. It didn't stop her from training in how to use them however.
“At least your sister took good care of it,” Sokka told him, his fingers slowly caressed the flat part of the blade, a wide grin on his tanned face. “Oh, how I missed you, space sword!”
Katara glanced at him and frowned. “If she had it, do you really think it's a good idea to just take it back?”
“But it's my sword!” Sokka argued.
Toph chuckled at the exchange. “My money is on Dragon Princess taking it back and leaving Sokka to cry.”
Looking highly offended, with his eyebrows so high they touched his hairline, Sokka sheathed the blade and hugged it tight to his chest. “She'll have to pry it from my own hands.”
Katara sighed and shook her head, but she said nothing more. They fell into comfortable silence until they touched down on the ship. Zuko sighed in relief when he saw the ship was still in its same position as when they left.
“Wh-what happened?” Suki had been the first one to see and greet them, her eyes held on Azula's prone form still in Zuko's arms. A crowd was quick to attract towards them, Ty Lee’s eyes widened and a hand lifted up towards her mouth.
The Fire Lord sighed, he and Aang needed a long talk about what happened in the Spirit World and what exactly he did to Azula. And he also needed to update Suki and her Kyoshi Warriors on what transpired.
“We'll meet and discuss everything,” Zuko replied, authority stern in his voice. His eyes drifted to Katara and Aang. “Is there anything more we can do for Azula?”
“I need more water,” Katara answered and began walking towards the entrance to the interior of the ship. Zuko and Aang quickly followed her.
Zuko stopped misstep and turned back to Suki. “Can you get the ship sailing back to the Fire Nation capital? And then we can meet and get everyone caught up.”
Zuko was glad to have the hindsight to use one of the Fire Nations larger ships. Since his banishment he grew accustomed to smaller models, but with a larger crew than he normally sailed with, he opted to use a larger ship. Particularly one of his fathers personal ships. It held more private, larger rooms.
He didn't want to be too far from Azula–should she awaken– and Zuko didn't want whoever would be guarding her to be left out of the meeting, or simply be unable to contain her should she awaken and act hostile. So he chose to have a tub be deposited into one of the larger rooms on the top floor. It wouldn't be ideal, but it would be large enough for his friends and the Kyoshi Warriors to gather.
Katara filled the tub with their drinking water. She said the more pure the water the better. So using water from the ocean was not an option. The tub only needed to be filled enough for Azula's body to be submerged, her head was placed against the rim to prevent her from falling under and drowning. Azula’s shoes were removed along with her coat and outer shirt, but to give her some modesty she was left in her inner shirt and pants.
While everyone came into the room, Zuko watched Katara work silently. The wounds on Azula's forehead slowly healed, the skin appearing like she received the wounds days ago rather than an hour.
“Her energy flow is weak,” Katara announced.
“That’s because she was in the Spirit World, her soul was separated from her body for a time,” Aang explained. Zuko frowned at the little bit of information.
When it finally looked like everyone was in the room, Zuko and Aang glanced at each other to determine who would speak first. Aang motioned for the Fire Lord to begin. Zuko recapped what had awaited them at the dragon’s nest, Azula’s transformation while Aang was in the Spirit World, their battle, and then finally the conclusion with Aang doing something to Azula that made the dragon traits fade in a blue mist and she had been unconscious ever since.
Aang cleared his throat to begin explaining what he knew of what had happened. “When I got to the Spirit World it was too late. Azula agreed to a deal from this dark spirit named Longmu. Well, actually the name of the dragon that was killed at the nest, her name was Longmu. But when a dragon is killed, their death site creates this imbalance between our world and the Spirit World. When Longmu was slain, think of the nest as a location where the barrier between our worlds got really thin. Some spirits managed to get into our world.
What I’ve learned about spirits is that they can be influenced by their environment or the people around them. And Longmu died defending her home and her eggs–her children–from a group of hunters. While she died she was forced to watch the hunters leave with her eggs. All that pain and anger influenced one of the spirits and it took on the persona of Longmu. The spirit wanted nothing more than revenge, but it was unable to leave the nest.
The thing about spirits is that when it possesses a person’s body, the person has to be fully willing to accept that spirit. If the person doesn’t, the spirit feeds off of their energy until they die.”
Zuko’s eyebrows lifted and touched his hairline. “So that’s why Azula’s energy is so weak?”
“I’m getting there,” Aang replied. “However, if a person is fully welcoming of a spirit into their body, the spirit can share their strength with that person, and the spirit feeds off of their energy a lot slower. When I got to the Spirit World, Azula and Longmu made a deal and then they returned to our world. I noticed there were other spirits in the area and I asked them about what had happened, what was the deal they made. It took me a while to find a spirit willing to tell me what I needed to know in exchange for a game to play.”
“Seriously?” Soka interjected. “A spirit’s price for information was a game?” Suki smacked his arm before she lifted a finger to her lips to shush him.
Aang shrugged. “Longmu was stuck at the nest, and needed to possess a person to escape. She recognized Azula's power and desire for more of it. So Longmu offered her strength in exchange to burn everything in our world.”
Zuko blinked. He really shouldn't be surprised, it had been Azula's suggestion to their father to burn Ba Sing Se to the ground. He glanced at her prone form. Disappointment surged in his veins.
“Azula stated she didn’t care for the other kingdoms, but the Fire Nation was off limits. That’s when they made their deal, and Azula made a mistake. You see, when you make a deal with a spirit you have to be very specific in any conditions, and you must make the spirit repeat those conditions.”
“Well, thank you for educating us all on how to make the best deals with dark spirits,” Toph muttered.
“So,” Ty Lee cut in. “She made a deal without the spirit agreeing to keep the Fire Nation out of its destructive plans?”
Aang nodded grimly. “During our fight, Longmu stated she would make Azula watch as she burned the Fire Nation to the ground. That was when Azula began to refuse Longmu. She had the opportunity to strike me with lightning again, but it was Azula that gained control of herself at the last moment and missed.”
“So you’re saying she missed on purpose?” Zuko asked. He felt stunned. Azula had the opportunity to kill Aang and she chose not to? Despite his earlier disappointment with her, now he felt a flicker of hope. Maybe he could convince her to work with him instead of against him.
“Yes, and again when she dove at me and then just suddenly stopped.”
“I thought that was you that stopped her,” Katara stated.
“Nope, that was all Azula. And…I think she knew she wasn’t going to survive long. She preferred to die by my hand rather than a spirit.”
Despite the questions that were asked moments ago, now that Aang concluded his story no one had anything to say.
Zuko inhaled deeply and rubbed his eyes. “So what now? You said you absorbed Longmu.”
“There isn’t a way to kill a spirit. But a spirit can absorb another spirit and in a way it’s like they both continue to live.”
“But, you’re not a spirit. So how did you manage to absorb Longmy?” Sokka asked, one eyebrow arched.
“Longmu,” Aang corrected. “And I’m the bridge between the Spirit World and our world. I had some help.” He pointed to the arrow on his forehead, implying his Avatar State.
“But you’ll be okay?” Asked Katara. “You won’t suddenly grow dragon horns and wings wanting to destroy the entire world?”
The Avatar shook his head. “No, when I absorbed Longmu I pacified the spirit.”
“Well, that’s good, I guess.” Toph announced. “So what happens now, Zuko?”
All eyes turned to the young Fire Lord. What was he going to do? Zuko set out to find Azula and hoped to get her to return to the Fire Nation, to become part of his family again. He sighed.
“For now, we head back to the capital. We’ll watch over Azula in shifts, I want at least one Kyoshi Warrior to oversee her should she need to be chi-blocked.”
“And then when we get back to the palace?” Suki asked.
“Then, well… I’ll figure it out when we cross that bridge.”
* * *
Azula felt like she was dying. The first few bouts of consciousness she was never awake long enough to open her eyes before she was pulled back into the cold arms of the abyss. When she was finally able to open her eyes she didn't recognize where she was. And she could never stay awake longer than a minute. Her body felt heavy, it took much more effort to turn her head than it did just to lift her eyelids. Her skin felt clammy and cold, but on the inside her body felt like it was on fire. She felt a lot worse than when she was drugged at the mental institute.
Sometimes she'd awaken to the sound of voices, but her sluggish mind couldn't form the words being said. She hated being so feeble, but her limbs refused to obey her commands.. Sleep always overpowered her.
Azula woke and simply felt cold. It took her a long moment to twitch a few fingers and toes to realize that she was below water. That made no sense, she was breathing. Wasn't she? She couldn't breathe underwater. Her eyes closed and she fell back under.
Azula's mind felt clearer when she woke again, but the cold was getting worse. She was shivering. They had to have put her in a fridge. And must've dumped water on her to make the cold even more unbearable. Little did they know she figured out a way to keep the cold from blocking her firebending. But right now she was too tired, her mind too foggy for her to be able to meditate and focus on her breathing.
She moved an arm and her limb quickly met a flat, hard surface and she recognized the resistance of water when she moved. Her eyes finally obeyed her and cracked open. It took an unknown time for her blurry eyesight to focus and confirm her suspicions.
She was in a tub filled with water. Freezing cold water. Her mind went from serene calm to a panicked frenzy within an eye blink. Her heart threatened to explode and all her still slightly sluggish mind could comprehend was that she needed to get out. It was torture to be forced to lay in icy water for hours–not that the caretakers cared– but the added electric shocks were the absolute worst. Every so called session left her feeling like a little piece of herself died each time.
Get out, get out, get out!
She thrashed, her arms and legs bounced off the walls of the tub, but the water made it slippery when she tried grabbing at the rim to pull herself out. Hands shoved at her shoulders to hold her back down. She wouldn't let them do this to her again. She had enough of it. But she couldn't bend lightning while she was submerged in water without harming herself.
“She's not calming down! The water should've kept her calm.” A voice said.
Azula had to get out quickly. When they lost control of her that's when the electric shocks came.
“LET ME GO!” She roared, but she was embarrassed by how weak and hoarse her voice sounded.
The room lit up in a blue hue periodically when she bent fire in her fists and feet whenever they breached the water, but then her flames were immediately snuffed out when she was shoved back under. Then she felt the familiar jabs at different parts of body. Being chi blocked never hurt, but it immediately robbed her body of its strength and she slumped back into the icy water. When she fell back in, her face was submerged under the surface.
Would this be how she died? In a tub at the nuthouse? Would they even tell Zuko? Probably not. Her own death would mean death for her caretakers for allowing a royal family member to die on their watch. Not that Zuko would ever find out anyway, he never cared to visit her. Nor uncle.
Hands reached down and grabbed her shirt and pulled her out. It was hard to take a deep breath after inhaling water. She choked and coughed and then the strangest sensation of water feeling like it was being pulled out of her occurred. She watched as a stream of water erupted from her mouth and nostrils. When the water stopped coming out she coughed, hoping to get rid of the discomfort.
Either the near drown or the chi block grounded Azula. She felt like she could focus on her situation. She found herself sitting in a tub, the water still deathly freezing despite her trying to heat it during her panic, and two people were at her side. One looked familiar. Blue robes, tanned skin, blue eyes and a strange hairstyle.
The water peasant! The same one that chained her during her Agni Kai against Zuko.
The other person was a complete mystery with the white makeup covering her face, but Azula recognized her as another one of Kyoshi’s Warriors. Wait, she chi blocked her. So was that Ty Lee? No, the eyes weren't brown, they were green.
A weak groan escaped her lips. The world was starting to spin, her eyes threatened to close, and her stomach twisted with nausea.
“Get me out,” Azula commanded, her voice shook and her teeth chattered.
“What’s going on?”
Azula couldn't turn her head to see who entered, but she recognized her brother's voice. How long has it been since they last met? Yet all she could think about was how tired she felt. Her stomach churned even more and her mouth began to water. It was hard to gain control of her breathing, she panted hard.
“Get. Me. Out.” She repeated between gulps of air.
“She woke up and suddenly started to panic, even though the water should have kept her calm,” explained the Water Tribe peasant.
“Azula?” Zuko stepped in her field of vision. “Did you have to chi block her?”
“Yes,” the Kyoshi Warrior answered.
So then Ty Lee taught her own chi blocking techniques to foreigners? To their war enemies? She shouldn't be surprised, she was a traitor afterall. She nearly laughed bitterly if she wasn't feeling so nauseated.
“She was starting to firebend so I had no choice.”
“I understand, you don't have to defend your actions.”
Azula scoffed. Of course he'd allow them to do as they pleased with her.
“Can we get her out?” Zuko motioned to her. “She's shivering.”
“Oh! I'm sorry, I didn't realize. Yes, we can get her out now. Her energy has improved, it's still low, but not nearly as much as it was before.” The peasant explained.
The world spun faster when Zuko lifted her out of the tub and she nearly retched on his robes then and there. While it would've been a bit funny to see his reaction, it still would've been humiliating to disgrace herself in front of the peasants. Her nausea wasn't going away and being carried about was making it worse.
“Zuzu,” she whispered through clenched teeth. “Get me out of here.”
“Hmm? What, you mean like let you go? I'm sorry, Azula. I can't do that. If you let me–”
“--No, dumdum! Get me out,” she paused to swallow. “Of this room. I'm going to be sick.”
“Oh!” Zuko's eyes widened and he glanced around in a panic.
“What's wrong?” Katara asked.
“Nothing, nothing, I'll take care of Azula from here. Uh, one moment.” Zuko said awkwardly before he dashed out of the room.
Azula clenched her eyes shut and groaned. She heard a door click shut and her eyes opened. They were in a bathroom. At least Zuko had the mental capacity to remember she was chi blocked and couldn't move. He set her down in front of the toilet without a second to spare and kept her from falling over as she finally emptied the contents of her stomach.
She had no idea when she last ate or drank so all she brought up was bile, her throat burned and when she was done no matter how many times she spat she couldn't get the vile taste out of her mouth. She hadn't realized her hair was down until she felt Zuko hold it back. Her body stiffened, she nearly shouted at him for touching her hair. No one touched her hair. But just the act of vomiting exhausted her. Antagonizing him would take too much effort.
This was definitely one of her worst episodes. And it was embarrassing that it was witnessed by others. Once her dry heaves ceased, Azula slumped in Zuko's grip and closed her eyes.
“Azula?” Zuko's voice sounded panicked.
She suppressed a sigh. What did it look like she was doing? But even speaking took too much energy she didn't have. “‘M tired. G'way.”
“You're not sleeping here,” Zuko told her sternly. “For one, we should get you out of those soaked clothes. And then an actual bed to sleep on.”
Thankfully, she fell back to unconsciousness before he could lift her. So she was unable to endure more humiliation of having to be dressed. It was one thing to have her servants dress her, it was a privilege for them to tend to her. But it is another to have to be dressed like an invalid simply because she was chi blocked.
The next time she woke she was alone in a room. She tested if she regained control of her muscles and was pleased to feel that she did. She rolled her head about to survey the room. The interior was of Fire Nation design. The constant rocking of the room and the smell of salt told her she was on a ship. What happened? Last she remembered…
The dark spirit!
The fallen princess sat up quickly and immediately regretted it when her vision swam and the room began to spin. She fell back onto her pillow with a groan and draped a forearm over her eyes.
“Are you okay?”
Azula jolted. She didn't notice anyone else in the room. But she recognized that voice. She looked in the general vicinity of whomever spoke, in the little light the moon provided through the window, she could just make out the green Kyoshi Warrior armor. The bitterness of her former friend's betrayal was still raw and she felt anger pump through her veins.
She waved a hand at the other woman in a dismissive gesture. “Fine. Not that you care, traitor.” Azula winced at the sound of her voice. Rather than sounding stern and authoritative it was soft and hoarse. Weak.
“Azula…”
“Save it!” She held in a groan as she forced herself to sit up, slowly this time. Black spots appeared in her vision, but she blinked them away and took deep breaths. Her arms struggled to push her weight against the bed she was lying on. She felt as if she had been through one of father's all nighter drills. It was like a heavy weight pushed down on her entire body. She swung her legs over to the edge of the bed and prepared herself to stand up. She needed fresh air, it would've been better if she could feel the sun on her skin, but she'd have to wait hours for that. And she was thirsty.
“Where are you going?”
Azula exhaled heavily. “Are your prisoners not allowed to stretch their legs?”
Footsteps alerted her of another’s incoming presence. A shadow moved at the door–Azula hadn’t realized it was open–and then she heard Zuko’s voice again.
“You’re not a prisoner, Azula.” His broad shouldered silhouette stepped in and then the room brightened when he lit a lamp. He set down a tray that held a bowl, two cups and a teapot.
The former princess laughed as she tried to stand, but her exhaustion came back. Her legs quaked when she put the smallest bit of weight on them. She knew if she stood she'd collapse. And she showed enough weakness to her brother and his friends to last a lifetime. So she used the last of her strength to shuffle back where she laid, her back supported by the pillows.
“Then tell me, dear brother, why am I even here? Wh–” she bit her tongue to keep her from asking what happened. Her memories were a bit scattered, last she remembered was agreeing to the dark spirits deal. “–How long has it been?”
Zuko understood her insinuation. He grabbed the teapot and poured its steaming contents into the cups then held one of them out to her. Azula grimaced at the scent of the hot leaf water, but she was thirsty. And she still had the lingering foul taste of her sickness in the back of her throat. She took the offered cup, but forced herself to avoid sipping it immediately.
She had no idea why she felt so weak and tired. It was similar to how she would feel from whatever drugs they gave her at the nuthouse, but much worse. She didn't trust whatever Zuko offered her. But he poured the tea for himself as well so she waited until he drank some before she would take a sip.
He brought the cup to his lips and took a sip, the tip of his tongue poked out to catch a stray drop that escaped. Azula waited until she saw the bob of his throat as he swallowed. Nothing happened after a moment. She was too thirsty to wait for him to take another drink just to be sure. The tea was hot, but not scalding. And the warmth of the liquid soothed her throat. She drained the cup in three rapid swallows. Not being much for tea, she was unable to recognize what it was. Zuko refilled her cup.
“Including the day we found you, you've been mostly sleeping for four days.”
Azula's eyes widened and she nearly choked on the tea. But first, she chose to inquire about the first thing that she had been curious about since she woke up with some sense. “How did you find me?”
Zuko took another drink before he placed the cup back on the tray. “An Admiral sent me a message.”
Azula mentally cursed, she immediately knew who the culprit was. While Zuko continued to explain, she tuned him out. So Chan did know who she was.
“So you followed me to the dragon's nest. I would ask if the Avatar stole my bending, but I know he didn't.” To prove her point, she lifted a hand palm up and bent a blue flame. Exhaustion bore into her harder and the black spots returned to her vision. She didn't realize she was slumping sideways until Zuko caught her and straightened her back up.
“It's a long story.”
She scoffed and fought off the urge to close her eyes. “As you can see, Zuzu, I'm not going anywhere.”
Yet, she vowed. While they were at sea she was trapped until they got to their destination. As tempting as it was to take control of the ship, she wasn't delusional. She was outnumbered and she nearly passed out just from bending a small flame. What happened that rendered her so weak and useless?
And so Zuko began to explain everything that happened when he found her at the dragon's nest. Shortly into his explanation he remembered the bowl he brought and offered it to her.
A simple dish, noodles bathed in broth. The mere scent of it had her mouth watering. If she went four days without eating then the fierce grumble of her stomach made sense, she felt ravenous. She nearly devoured the meal, but she needed to know it was safe to eat. She brought the bowl to her lips and pretended to drink.
She smacked her lips. “Are you trying to poison me?”
Zuko's eyes widened comically and his eyebrow vanished in his hairline. “What? No! How could you suggest such a thing?”
“Then why does this broth taste odd? Like poison odd.”
The bowl was immediately snatched from her grip and Zuko took a large audible gulp.
“Zuko, no!”
Azula looked behind her brother to see Ty Lee rushing towards them. She had forgotten her former friend was still in the room.
“I don't taste anything different,” Zuko reassured. “It's the same noodles we ate for dinner. No one touched this but me.”
Azula grinned and took the bowl back. “Relax, Zuzu. It was just a joke.” Now that she knew it was safe she began to eat.
Zuko and Ty Lee glared at her.
“How is that a joke?!”
“Why are you so mean all the time?”
They both said in unison. Azula shrugged as she chewed some noodles. “It's one of my many talents. And it's a joke because I got a chuckle out of it. Honestly, you should've seen the look on both your faces.” She waved dismissively at Ty Lee again but was ignored until Zuko gave her a nod. Then she returned to her spot by the door.
Zuko rubbed his eyes and continued his story. Azula frowned as she digested the information. It helped fill in the gaps of her memory. She began to remember more and more, including when the spirit admitted to lying to her about not attacking the Fire Nation. Her grip on her chopsticks threatened to snap them in half. Another betrayal to add to her ever growing list.
“Azula?”
Knocked out of her thoughts, Azula shoved the empty bowl into Zuko's chest. She covered a yawn behind the back of a hand. Now that her thirst and hunger were sated, she just wanted to go back to sleep. But there were more pressing questions she needed answered.
“You and the Avatar could have left me to die once I began refusing the spirit. It was only a matter of letting it happen. You both would have kept your hands clean. So why did you let me live?”
Zuko looked at her as if she grew horns again. “Is it really so hard to believe that I don't want you to die? Sure our…relationship hasn't been normal. We've tried to kill each other more often than total strangers. But the war is over, Azula. And there's something you need to know.”
A sinking feeling in her gut nearly threatened to bring her noodles back up. Azula felt her heart beat faster. She grabbed handfuls of the bed cover and tightened her grip.
“That letter mom wrote,” he said hesitantly. “She suspected our father was reading them. She wanted to hurt him, just as he hurt her, even if it was just for a moment. So, she lied.”
Fury ignited within Azula. It had to be a lie. She was father's daughter, mother told her as much the moment she was recognized for being a firebending prodigy. She was the rightful Fire Lord!
“You're lying!” She accused him. She caught movement from Ty Lee and faced the threat. But Zuko lifted an arm protectively between her and the traitor.
“You tell me, Azula,” he muttered softly. His eyes were stern and bore into her own. “You'd know if I was lying, right? Look at me and tell me you believe I'm lying.”
Her vision began to swim and the scent of something burning reached her nostrils. In her anger she had begun to burn the bed cover in her grip. She couldn't pass out. With a deep breath, she studied Zuko's face intensely. He stared back at her with equal determination.
No, no, no! She screamed internally. The throne was hers! Father implied as much.
Didn't he?
Why else would he push her so hard to grow in his image? Why else did he expect nothing but perfection from her if he wasn't shaping her to be the next Fire Lord? He left her in charge of the Fire Nation when he declared himself the Phoenix King!
And then he lost the war. He became powerless, weak. Useless as he rotted away behind bars.
And Zuko claimed his birthright by defeating her in an Agni Kai for the throne. And won. With the help of a foreigner, a peasant, but he won all the same.
Azula felt herself sag back against the pillows. Zuko was telling the truth. They were of the same blood, from the same mother and father.
Everything she did to take back her throne was for naught.
A small flicker of fire erupted within her again. “So mother put a target on your back just to upset father? You're okay with that?!”
It all makes sense. No wonder why father was willing to kill Zuko when grandfather commanded it. And why he burned half his face before banishing him.
Zuko sighed. “He knew the truth even when he read mom's letter. He had her followed before they married. Father knew I was his son. But he still had no issues with treating me like garbage just to spite mom.”
Azula frowned. “And mother had no issues with seeing me as a monster just because father was proud of my talent!”
Zuko sighed again and slumped his head down. “Azula, I don’t want us to fight. I’m tired of us always being at each other’s throats! I grew up feeling envious of you because you had everything I wanted, everything came easy to you while I struggled. I wanted our father to be proud of me just as he was proud of you. And you wanted something similar, but with mom. When I was at my lowest, you were at your highest. You accomplished what grown men failed to do in the war, including uncle. And when you were at your lowest, I was at my highest. I sided with Aang, and we won the war. Everything you worked for amounted to nothing while I became Fire Lord.”
Azula bit her tongue. She wanted nothing more than to interrupt and argue and just be angry, but she forced herself to be silent. It was nothing more than mere curiosity of where Zuko was going with his speech.
“We don’t have to be opposites of each other, Azula. We’re firebenders, we rise with the sun together. We shouldn’t rise and fall at the cost of the other.”
Azula fought desperately against the pressure behind her eyes. She wouldn’t let the tears that threatened her fall free.
She swallowed the hard lump that formed in her throat. “So what happens now? Did you chase me down so you could throw me back in the nuthouse? Or will you take my bending and throw me in a cell next to father?” She shouldn’t have felt nervous with Zuko’s hesitance, but she did. His hesitance meant that he was considering either of those options.
“I wanted to give you an offer.”
A snort escaped the fallen princess.
“The last place we fought one another, you said it was the crypt of the first Fire Lord’s most trusted advisor,” Zuko began. Azula narrowed her eyes, she knew already where he was going with this. “Eventually I had an idea. Instead of us fighting each other, what if we worked together? It’s what you wanted, wasn’t it? Not to be the Fire Lord yourself, but through me in a way you are the Fire Lord.”
Azula arched a delicate eyebrow. If Zuko didn’t look and sound so serious she would’ve thought he was simply messing with her. She nearly laughed if her head wasn’t still reeling from the massive information dump.
But…it’s not a bad offer, she thought.
“What aren’t you telling me?” She countered. Such a generous offer wouldn’t be without conditions. And after dealing with a spirit that nearly killed her, she knew to approach offers very carefully.
Zuko rubbed the back of his head, a nervous tick he’s had since they were children. It nearly pained Azula to see him be so transparent with his nervousness, did he do this with the nobles and his advisors?
“The New Ozai Society is still at large and growing. If you return it’ll create conflict in court. You cannot give them any reason to believe you’re secretly working against me.”
“So I’ll still be a prisoner, but in our own home.” Azula clarified. She saw through Zuko’s wording. It wasn’t just his court that would distrust her.
“And…mom is living at the palace. Including Kiyi and mom’s husband. I understand their presence may be a discomfort for you, but I’d appreciate it if we could all live together peacefully.”
“Play nice with mother, her new husband and new daughter.” Azula rolled her eyes.
Zuko suddenly stood and grabbed the tray he came in with. “I understand if you need some time to think it over. I’ll leave you to rest.”
Azula had one final question, but she refrained from asking until Zuko was at the doorway. “And if I refuse your offer? What happens to me?”
His shoulders slumped and he turned to face her. “You’ll be free to leave. I don’t hold you responsible for the things you did during the war. You were only following father’s orders, just as I did for a time. But if you choose to leave and continue to try to overthrow me, I’ll have no choice but to track you down again. And then I’ll agree to have the Avatar take away your bending so you’ll no longer pose a threat to the peace Aang and I have been working to keep.”
The fallen princess smirked, she had been expecting that ultimatum. “If it comes to that, the Avatar can try to take my bending, but you’ll have to finish the job and kill me. Because I won’t be like father.”
The lone light from the lantern wasn’t enough to allow Azula to make out Zuko’s expression, but she didn’t have to see to know he wasn’t happy with that declaration. They said nothing more to each other. Eventually he bade her a good night and left. Thankfully Ty Lee said nothing either. Azula finally gave into her exhaustion and shut her eyes.
She would give Zuko her answer in the morning.