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Ella skipped into the familiar basement, setting her bag down next to her spot on the couch. Harold was already there, fidgeting with a rubix cube.
She sat down next to him, placing the bowl of popcorn inbetween them. He finally put the rubix cube down. "Gosh, took you long enough!"
While his tone said opposite to some, Ella knew him well enough to know that he there wasn't any malice behind it. "Oh I'm so terribly sorry, my animal friends weren't there to help me this time!" He snickered a little, proud of this newfound, slight edge he'd given her. Harold inserted a DVD into the TV and sat back down.
"I still can't believe you've never seen Mulan before. It's practically a perfect combination of our intrests, mixed together into an hour and a half long piece of art-" She playfully tossed a bit of popcorn at him to get him to shut up, as the movie was starting.
『 ─ ⚙ ─ 』
Ella lit up as she heard music start. The songs were always her favorite part, no matter how much she insisted she didn’t have one. What she didn't have, was a favorite movie. How do you choose a favorite?!
Mulan took off her necklace, and Ella slowly stopped flapping her hands. Harold noticed this, but didn't comment. Her full attention was on the screen infront of her, no, not the screen, the lyrics.
"Can it be, that I'm not meant to play this part?"
Something about that stung at Ella's heart, leaving it throbing and full of.. empathy? But she hadn't felt like that before, right?
Right?
The vocals hit her like a truck. Why are these lyrics so familiar!? A thought flew into her mind for a moment. No... that can't be it..
『 ─ ⚙ ─ 』
Ella was walking home from school, skirt flowing in the wind. For some reason, she felt particularly off today. She's had off days before, but the feelings never felt this strong.
There was a bird feeder on her street corner, so she often liked to watch the birds that came by before she headed inside. Suddenly, she felt a gentle tug on her skirt, and looked down to see a little boy, maybe 4 or 5, tugging on her skirt.
"Excuse me miss?"
The sentance felt bitter. Bitter? Why bitter? The kid hadn't done anything wrong, so why was she so upset?
"Oh, hello there!" She smiled down at the boy.
"I just wanted to say- uh, you're really pretty! Like a princess!"
There it was again. That bitter feeling. Why is she so upset?!
The kid tugged on her skirt again. She pushed the feeling down to be delt with later.
"Oops, sorry! I got a little lost in thought. But thank you!" She knelt down to the kid's level and booped his nose. "You wanna hear a secret?" The kid nodded eagerly. She leaned into whisper into his ear. "I think you're really handsome!"
The boy beamed and started jumping up and down. "Yeah! I'm handsome! Wooooo!"
A new feeling hit Ella as she said that. Jealousy!? Why would she be jealous of a random kid? Luckily for her, the kid's parents eventually showed up to collect him and take him back home.
Now to deal with those feelings.
『 ─ ⚙ ─ 』
She remembered the rest of that day vaugly. She said something to her parents about the feelings, but she was brushed off immediately, so she just brushed them off herself.
That didn't stop them from happening though...
"Who is that girl I see, staring straight back at me?"
She remembered how she felt this morning. How her hair felt a little too long, her dress just a little uncomfortable, so much so that she had to change into something else entirely and ended up late for school. She felt a little too...
"Why is my reflection someone I don't know?"
Feminine.
"When will my reflection show who I am, inside?"
『 ─ ⚙ ─ 』
Harold knew that look anywhere. Ella always made a certain face whenever she was about to cry. The song was over at this point, so he paused the movie, (she hated whenever he paused in the middle of a song), and gently shook her shoulder.
"Ella? You okay?"
She couldn't face him. So she didn't.
"Yeah... just thinking."
Harold didn't hesitate to pull her into a hug. "Is there anything you want to talk about?"
She hesitated a bit. What if he brushed her feelings aside like her parents did?! Why did refering to herself as she feel so bitter!?
They pulled out of the hug, and she looked back to his face. All she could see was concern, with a bit of that Harold Curiosity™. They've been best friends for years. He wouldn't.
"Sometimes I just.. uh, I'm starting to think sometimes I want to be more of a prince then a princess.." She looked down at her hands, the screen, the now abandoned popcorn bowl, anywhere but Harold’s face. "But not all the time! Sometimes, I love to just twirl around in a pretty dress and be a princess! It's just, other times... I want to be a prince, a handsome one, with a cool sword and a crown instead of a tiara."
Harold still hadn't said anything. His hand closed in on hers, gently circling it, but he still hadn't said anything.
"Sometimes I want to be a princess..."
"You do?!"
They hadn't meant to respond so eagerly. But it was such a relief to know they weren't the only one feeling this way.
"My apologies, that sounded wrong. I get it. But then sometimes it's like-"
"You're not really either."
"You're not really either."
Ella chuckled. Harold smiled, letting go off their hand. "Do you wanna try something?"
They tilted their head. "Try what?"
"Pronouns. I mean, if you feel like a prince, why not be adressed as one."
Ella thought back to that bitter feeling. Had she been a prince that day? Was that a boy walking home that day? They adjusted so they were facing Harold fully.
"I guess it would be fun to try!"
Harold nodded as he thought of an example sentance. "So, this is my best friend Ella, he's 13 years old and his favorite color is pink."
Ella was suddenly hit with a very different feeling. The feeling she imagined the hero getting after the villian was finally defeated. Happiness wasn't a strong enough word to describe it.
Euphoria.
His hands flapped excitedly. Harold, noticing this reaction, went a step further. He speed crawled off the couch, much to Ella's confusion, and came back with a kazoo. "Here we have... Prince Elliott!" He played the kazoo like a trumpet at coronation day.
There it was! That feeling again! Euphoria. "Oh! It's your turn now Harold!"
Harold put his kazoo back on the shelf. "I'm kinda feeling a.. they/he vibe today." Elliot nodded in understanding.
Now, what were they doing again?
Right, Mulan. Elliot picked up the popcorn bowl and readjusted on the couch, pressing play on play.
Maybe Elliot does have a favorite movie after all.