Chapter Text
A/N: I made a tiny change to this chapter since posting it the first time. Not a big change, but something that needed to be done for the sake of the next chapter. That's what happens when I write when I'm half asleep, I guess.
A/N: Dear readers, I have been told that a better Mando’a word for ‘school’ would be ‘yaim be bajur’ so I’ll try to use that from now on. Sorry for using the wrong word.
Chapter 22: Guilt
Earlier-
Mandalore-
Herna-
They arrived on Mandalore in the very early morning, just as the sun had begun to rise, casting the vast desert in shades of orange and red. Herna flew her little ship behind her leader’s, trailing behind him. She listened over the communicator when the authorities on Mandalore contacted him and he gave an explanation for their visit. Permission to land was given and they descended to the planet’s surface, into the immense landing field outside Keldabe. There were many others there, hundreds of ships, in fact.
“We are here for the Festival,” Herna’s leader told the guards when they reached the Glass Gates that led into the city.
“You and half the Empire,” the guard said, good naturedly. “Where do you hale from?”
“Concordia.”
“A rough place, these days. Go ahead in, but if you cause trouble you’ll be doing time in the Clink. You need a copy of the laws?”
“I’ve been here before. I won’t cause trouble.”
“Then it’s good to have you. Enjoy the festival. Your image will be recorded when you go into the city so we have record of your armor. Understood?”
“Understood.” The leader looked from one guard to the other. “May I ask your opinion of this new claimant to the title of Mand’alor?”
The guard who hadn’t spoken until then, took off his helmet and smiled. “I came here with Alor Mereel, so I’m probably not the best one for an unbiased opinion, but he’s got my support. I’ve followed him into battle for more than a decade and, good luck willing, I’ll die in battle fighting beside him.”
“I haven’t met him, yet,” the second guard said. “But his people speak very well of him and I suppose that must mean something. Right?”
It was not the most rousing endorsement, but it would do.
Herna didn’t care a wit about the new self-proclaimed Mand’alor other than the fact that he was rumored to have Obi-Wan in his custody.
Herna followed her leader into the city. It had been many, many years since she’d gone to Keldabe and she missed nothing about it. Such busy cities held no appeal at all. But somewhere, in all the noise and activity, was Obi-Wan. He would need her. With his Master dead, he was sure to need her even more than he had before and she was determined that she would find him on Mand’alor. She would not allow him to escape, again.
They walked through the city to the Grand Avenue where the Festival of Stars would be held with the mighty Fortress standing tall above them all. Herna’s leader rented a space (might as well earn a few credits while they were there, after all) and studied it for a time. There were many merchants and crafts people setting up similar stalls all along the Grand Avenue. There were lanterns being hung above the street and bright colored ribbons wrapped around the tall poles of the streetlights. A short distance from where they stood, a band practiced its’ music to the delight of a small handful of ade who had escaped their caretakers.
“A joyful time,” Herna’s leader said, blandly. “We will bring the equipment here and I will build the smithy.” They went back to his ship together to retrieve the first load of his supplies and while he worked on assembling that in the space he’d rented, Herna would make multiple trips back to the ship to retrieve more.
The smithy would house the powerful Forge, a table to keep the leader’s tools on, and a bench. It was nothing compared to what he had built on Concordia, but it would do. When there was no more fetching and carrying to do, Herna was set as guard, standing just outside the smithy to deter anyone stupid enough to invade while her leader worked. After quite a long time, nearly midday, all was done.
“I should like to scout the city,” Herna told her leader. “To see what this place has to offer.”
“The Living Waters are below in the mines.” He adjusted the flame on the forge by turning a wheel on the side that made the fire grow smaller, but turn from red and orange to blue and white. “There is little else to see but city. Go to the growing desert, if you wish to find find peace.”
Herna nodded, a show of obedience that she did not feel, and began to head towards the Fortress. She didn’t intend to ever see her leader, again.
As quietly as a shadow, Herna stayed near the Fortress for a time, waiting and listening. The Fortress was large and Herna drew no attention at all as she took what seemed like an easy stroll around the outside wall of it, just as many others were. There was no sign of Obi-Wan, but she knew he should be there if Jaster Mereel had him. The trick would be finding him when she had no real business being in the Fortress.
She caught snips of information from the conversations of other people she passed - gossip about the newcomers and whether or not they approved of the newly arrived Alor, what help they guessed he might be in the fight against Death Watch, and how his arrival was strangely welcomed by the young Duchess. But no Obi-Wan. She circled the Fortress twice, but didn’t catch sight of him.
Near the wall that surrounded the Fortress, there were many small businesses set up to take advantage of the comings and goings of people and one of those small businesses was a little shop that sold drinks. Herna stopped there and sat at one of the small tables the shop kept outside so its’ patrons could sit while they drank. She didn’t drink, but tried to think of what to do next. She would have to go into the Fortress to look for Obi-Wan. There was no telling how difficult it would be, but she was determined. She would never be able to fight her way in. Sneaking in was a sounder idea. There was a chance she could just walk in. She could tell them she was there to take custody of Obi-Wan and she knew, with absolute certainty, that Obi-Wan would embrace her happily the minute he saw her. He would understand that she was there to take care of him and he would tell Mereel that she was his buir.
Just as her mood began to lighten with the prospect of an easy way to get Obi-Wan, three people sitting at the table just next to her caught her attention.
“I was with the rescue party when we brought those boys onto the Bral and, let me tell you, they are some of the finest ade I have ever seen. Obi-Wan Kenobi, he’s the older one I told you about, he was so ill when we found him that he hardly knew up from down. The younger one, Anakin? Well, he was so worried that I thought he might start crying at any minute. And he threatened all of us, even Alor Mereel, with a blaster when we got onto the little ship he and Kenobi were on. Such a sweet dear. And when Kenobi woke up - my vod is an orderly in the infirmary so he saw it - the only concern he had was for little Anakin’s safety. He looks after his vod’ika with great regard. I may have to rethink my opinion of the Jetiise; the boy learned how to take care of Anakin from his people. I didn’t even think they knew proper childcare!”
One of the other Mandalorian’s said, “Well, I saw the little one when he came into the communication center with Alor Mereel and young Jango very late last night and - oh! Those big blue eyes.” He sighed. “Like a little angel. The poor kid was so disappointed when he couldn’t speak with the other Jetii more.”
“Why? What happened?”
“Well, it’s the storm, of course. Keeps interfering. They got to have about two words together before the storm ruined them for them. From what I hear, the boys will be going back to the Jetiise as soon as the storm passes, but I’m not sure if we’re sending them back with an escort or if the Jetiise will be coming here to retrieve them.”
“Jetti? Coming here. Oh... goodness.”
The second man looked at his friend and snickered. “Don’t you know we’re supposed to be ancient enemies? I’m pretty sure they hate us.”
The first man waved away the concern. “Bah! Who cares about archaic enmity? I’ve heard about what they can do in battle.” He dramatically fanned himself with his hand and feigned a swoon. “Grace, speed, deadly accuracy with those jetti’kad they use? Fight me any day, Jetii!” He laughed “After all, who wouldn’t fancy the idea of a fearsome warrior giving them the fight of their life? Jetii’kad burning, throwing light on their face as they come at me. Just imagine - they’re said to be able to deflect blaster bolts with their jetii’kad!” He sighed in bliss. “A thing of beauty.”
“I saw one once.”
“A jetii’kad?”
“No, a Jetii. A Togruta female, tall and stately, so dignified. Only saw her for a minute, didn’t even get to talk to her, but she wore a jetii’kad on a belt at her waist and was so... so confidant. Ancestors above, I wish I could have seen her arms under that robe. I bet Jetiise have magnificent biceps.”
They both sighed, longingly.
Another person joined them, setting her drink on the table before she sat. “What are we talking about, vode?”
“The two ade Alor Mereel brought with him. Jetii ade, at that. But I heard they lost their buir - they were trying to take him to their home on Coruscant when Alor Mereel found them. It would be a grand thing to add such fine ade to one’s clan.”
“They are fine,” the newest arrival said. “I was on guard duty at the Glass Gates when they arrived. The older boy - Kenobi - said that they’d adopted each other. How splendid is that? Finding themselves alone without buir, they take each other as family. Oh, my heart.”
“How,” one of the men asked, incredulously. “Is Alor Mereel not adopting those foundlings?
Herna froze. Alor Mereel? Adopting Obi-Wan? No. Never. The sickening thought of Mereel training Obi-Wan, teaching him lies about how to be Mandalorian... it disgusted her. Such a person could never be allowed to influence her Obi-Wan.
At the other table, the female verd answered, “The younger one has a buir. I heard it all from my cousin, a nurse who works directly for Doctor Gihan, and she was there when the older boy was so sick.” She leaned forward, as if to convey some terrible secret. “We all thought he might die, he was so weak!”
A chorus of gasps and hushed prayers were muttered.
“If he has a buir, then why aren’t the boys with them?”
“She’s a slave on Tatooine. My cousin heard it right from little Anakin’s mouth. Kenobi’s buir rescued Anakin, but couldn’t get the boy’s buir. But there is light in this darkness - rumor has it that Kenobi is planning to go back to Tatooine to get Anakin’s buir. He is near desperate to reunite them.”
“No!” One of them gasped. “The boy is planning something so ambitious? On his own? Surely, his people won’t allow it.”
“Maybe he’s not planning to ask. My cousin was cleaning the infirmary when she heard Kenobi tell Alor Mereel that he needed his ship because he was going to use it to buy Anakin’s buir’s freedom. He’d trade the whole ship for her.”
“Oh,” the third verd said, looking a bit teary eyed. “She must be a wonderful buir to have her ad going to such lengths, such danger for her sake.”
It was enough to make Herna want to throw up.
“She’s not Kenobi’s buir, but Anakin’s.”
Another wave of the hand. “The boys have adopted each other - Kenobi declared it for all to hear when he arrived. Anakin’s buir is so fortunate - when she gains her freedom, she will learn that she has another ad to call her own. Think how happy she will be! And after losing his own buir, young Kenobi will get a new family to help him in his time of mourning and support him when he speaks his Remembrances for his first buir. I wish them all the best.”
There was agreement all around the table and the subject changed to something that was entirely unimportant.
Obi-Wan, her dear boy, was being pursued by some creature who fancied herself a proper buir? Herna could just imagine what the woman was like - some sour-faced, foul-tempered, controlling snake. She’d just used Obi-wan to get free and then she’d abandon him. Or she’d keep him and use him. He’d never be happy with her, but he was such a good boy that he wanted to make the younger boy happy by fetching the buir. Anakin’s buir was too dangerous. And she must have been a horrible buir - what kind of buir allowed her ad to live in slavery?! She’d never be able to take care of Obi-Wan correctly. She’d end up hurting him. She couldn’t be allowed to even see Obi-Wan!
Herna left the eating area and, without hesitation, or much thought, she went to the landing fields outside Keldabe and there she watched as a group of people unloaded Obi-Wan’s little ship from Mereel’s Bral. She stayed concealed behind another nearby ship and watched in silence. The ship was efficiently unloaded and put next to Mereel’s ship. A moment later, the ship’s ramp lowered and a stasis pod was guided out by a Mandalorian in green armor. That verd spoke with a few people, then started pushing the stasis pod towards Keldabe. The other people left and in only a short time the landing field was empty and all went quiet.
The sun was high, beating down, making the sands burn. It reflected off Obi-Wan’s ship so sharply that it would have been almost impossible to look at it with bare eyes. It made the ship glow, and in comparison, the ships around were dull and faded.
She slipped out of her hiding place and stared at Obi-Wan’s ship as she approached it. Sabotage wouldn’t be enough. Mandalorians were far too competent and would be able to easily fix whatever she did to it. It would have to be more final.
She went onto the nameless little ship and took time to look around. There was nothing personal on the ship, nothing that showed Obi-Wan had planned to spend more than a very short time on it. She looked in the cockpit, first, at the chair where Obi-Wan must have sat to pilot the ship. Then she went to the main room, and then to the small berths. The blankets on one of the berth’s cots was rumpled and she guessed that Obi-Wan must have slept there. She picked up the thin blanket that had been on the cot and held it. It had been Obi-Wan’s. If he’d been as sick as the rumors claimed, then he would have used the blanket to keep warm. For a long while, she held the blanket. It was gray with a subtle green stitching at the hem. She hugged the blanket to her and imagined that she could almost feel Obi-Wan’s body heat still lingering on it. When she left the ship, she took the blanket with her.
The low roar of a ship overhead made Herna look up and saw a mid-sized ship soar over the landing field, heading to Keldabe. A round of shots erupted from the ship, centered on the Glass Gates. The guards there were forced to run for their lives. The ship’s blasts continued and the Glass Gates, where the shots hit, began to glow and turn red the longer those shot struck and after a few seconds, the gates shattered. Verde with jet packs swarmed from the ship and swiftly went into Keldabe through the broken Glass Gates. It was impossible not to see the colors the invaders wore on their armor or the symbol painted on the side of the ship - Death Watch.
Within moments, there was battle in Keldable as other verde rushed to defend against the attack.
Everyone knew that Death Watch was made of many small groups, each one with their own leader, though all answered to their Alor, Vizla. It wasn’t uncommon for one group of Death Watch to be entirely unaware of what another group was doing which was, at times, a great trial for anyone who stood against them because they were unpredictable and quick moving in a way that an organized army couldn’t be. However, it was also an advantage because while one group of Death Watch was a feared and deadly enemy, if every group attacked all at once, they might have succeeded in bringing Keldabe to its’ knees.
Keldable was burning. Thick clouds of black smoke billowed from the hole that had been blasted into the dome. Above the blast hole in the glass dome more smoke collected and would have to be let out before it suffocated the population.
Herna watched it all and it occurred to her, in a flash of inspiration, that the attack was the perfect cover. She looked back at Obi-Wan’s ship, the ship he would use to free the odious, despicable woman who would claim him as her child. That hated fiend. If the ship was gone, Herna reasoned, then Anakin’s buir wouldn’t be rescued and she wouldn’t be a threat to Obi-Wan. So, with Obi-Wan’s blanket still clutched in one hand, she pulled a thermal detonator from a pouch on her supply belt and stalked back to the ship.
On the underside of the ship’s polished hull, she found a suitable place and attached the explosive. She activated her jet pack and flew a good distance away before she detonated the bomb. The ship was blown apart. Given its’ small size, the ship was reduced to scrap. When the dust from the explosion settled, there was nothing standing where the ship had been, just a wide debris field of polished metal.
Obi-Wan was safe from the slave woman.
Elsewhere-
Satine-
She blinked. The sky was blue over head with only a barest shine from the glass dome. Her head was ringing and flashing stars danced in front of her eyes. She’d hit her head. And her elbow. It throbbed horribly. Her hand was tugged and she turned her head to see Obi-Wan, still holding her hand, starting to sit up.
“Anakin?” Obi-Wan looked around, his voice as calm as ever, though there was a spark of panic in his eyes. He struggled to his feet and Satine thought - her thoughts seemed strangely distant - that Obi-Wan was still sick. He said he was getting better, he said he was alright. But everyone said he’d been so sick and he seemed strangely tired all the time and... and... and his mother had tried to kill him? That couldn’t be right.
Goodness... her head really hurt.
She stood up with Obi-Wan, but felt rather unsteady on her feet.
A large hand touched her face and Satine jerked away from the touch, afraid that she’d get grabbed. She didn’t like it when people grabbed her. HE always grabbed her and she didn’t like it. It hurt. It wasn’t fair. All other Mandalorian kids got nice parents and hers had sent her away. Never even visited her. It wasn’t fair. She was a Mandalorian kid, too. She wanted a buir. A nice one who wouldn’t send her away and wouldn’t hurt her arms.
“Hold still, ad. Hold still. Just let me see.”
The big hand held her face steady and she blinked a few times before the stars in front of her eyes finally cleared and she realized it was Jaster who was holding her face. Satine took a few deep breaths and her head started to clear. Her fuzzy thoughts cleared and the ringing in her eyes faded away.
With Anakin held securely, half-way thrown over one of Jaster’s shoulders, Jaster looked closely at Satine’s eyes.
“Anakin’s not moving.” Satine watched the still little boy with dread.
Obi-Wan moved to stand behind Jaster where he could see Anakin’s face. “He’s got a lump on his head.”
“He’s not the only one,” Jaster said, frowning when he released Satine’s face. He asked Satine, “How do you feel?”
She took another deep breath and gave herself a little shake. She didn’t feel good, but her thoughts were clear. “I’m fine.”
Jaster carefully gave Anakin to Obi-Wan. “We’re under attack. Can you get back to the Fortress without me?” When Obi-Wan nodded as he took Anakin, Jaster said, “I know you’re tired, but go straight there as fast as you can.”
“Yes, sir.”
They were about to go when a great rush of noise signaled a jet pack just before Jango landed in their midst. “They came from the south,” Jango said the moment he touched ground. “The dome is broken and they’re getting in that way. There’s only one ship with a couple hundred verde.”
There was another explosion and a few blocks of stone fell off the top of a nearby building.
“See them back to the Fortress and take command there,” Jaster told Jango. Without another word or even waiting for a reply, Jaster took flight.
It was all very sensible, entirely the most logical plan they could have. But Satine turned and looked behind to the yaim be bajur where Bo-Katan was. She took two steps towards the yaim be bajur before her hand was caught and she swung around to face Jango. She tugged on her hand, trying to free herself. “I have to get Bo!”
The grip on her hand was tight, anchoring her in place. Jango told her, “Look! Look at it!” He jabbed a finger at the yaim be bajur, to the top of the high wall that surrounded it. Unsurprisingly, there were a great many Mandalorians standing atop of the battlements. “The attack came from the direction of the landing field, nowhere near the yaim be bajur. The only place more secure than the Fortress is a yaim be bajur. Your sister is safer than you are.”
Satine glared at Jango. She hated him in that moment, but if she did go to find Bo-Katan, if they opened the doors of the yaim be bajur for her, then it increased the chances that someone from Death Watch would get in and target not only Bo-Katan, but all the helpless students sheltering behind those walls. Satine turned from the yaim be bajur. “Give me Anakin,” she told Obi-Wan. “You need all your strength to run and he’s small enough for me to carry.”
With understandable reluctance, Obi-Wan obeyed. She had to balance Anakin draped over her shoulder with both of her arms wrapped around his legs to keep him steady. It wasn’t ideal, but Satine wasn’t a large person and it was the best she could do. Obi-Wan wasn’t strong enough to take care of himself and Anakin without help and Jango needed both hands free to defend them.
They ran, even as the sounds of fighting drew closer and, every now and again, Satine felt the ground under her feet rumble with the vibration of some sort of explosion. Jango killed only one person on their way to the Fortress
It didn’t take long to get to the Fortress, only a few minutes, really, and they dashed inside to be met with people rushing here and there. Standing in the great entry hall of the Fortress, Satine panted for breath and suddenly felt weak. Anakin was heavy. She hadn’t realized how heavy until that moment. Jango tried to take Anakin, but Satine tightened her arms. “I’ve got him. Infirmary. We need to get to the infirmary.”
Jango took off his helmet and looked at her so sadly that Satine thought he might cry. “Alright,” he said. “You’ve got him. Let’s get this done.”
The infirmary was in chaos. There were few injured from the Fortress, but a nearby clinic had evacuated its’ patients to the Fortress the moment the attack started and they took up most of the beds. Doctors and nurses ran here and there to do their best for patients. Doctor Gihan, in all his armor, noticed them almost instantly. He wordlessly took Anakin from Satine and lay him out on one of the few empty beds.
“He’s unconscious, but he’ll wake soon.” He put a quick dab of bacta on the lump on Anakin’s head and covered him with a blanket. “Any of you hurt?” He looked at the rest of them.
Obi-Wan stood at Anakin’s bedside and petted Anakin’s hair. “I’m alright. I think Satine knocked her head, too, though.”
Again, Doctor Gihan got a dose of bacta, then found the knot on the back of Satine’s head and rubbed it gently in. Almost immediately, Satine’s head began to feel better - clearer and steadier. “You’ll be fine,” he told Satine. “Sit and rest for a bit. I have to leave to help on the battlefield. I won’t be long.”
Jango saluted Doctor Gihan, then said to Satine, “I have work to do, but we’ll talk when this over.” Again, he got that strangely sad look on his face. He looked at Satine, Obi-Wan, and then at Anakin. “Be safe.” Then he turned and strode out of the infirmary.
It was terrible. The noise and mayhem on the infirmary. Someone started screaming and a nurse quickly gave them a pain killer that sent them into a stupor. A man was brought in missing a leg. Two children, twin girls, huddled together in a corner of the room while one of the doctors tried to get them to speak.
Satine watched it all and she thought about the explosions and fire fights and Bo-Katan being hidden behind stone walls to keep her alive.
Obi-Wan leaned over Anakin’s still body. “Anakin? Ani? Can you hear you hear me? Please, open your eyes. Come on, Ani.”
Satine put a hand to her stomach and started to back away.
The twin girls began to cry.
The man with the missing leg screamed and cursed and tried to stand.
A woman was brought in but put aside. A white blanket was brought to cover her, pulled completely over her face. Dead.
Satine took a few more steps back, then turned and left the infirmary. In the hall, she put her back against the wall just outside the infirmary.
“Satine!”
She looked up sharply and saw Trion striding towards her. “Trion!” Satine forced herself to stand up straight. “What’s going on outside? What news do you have?”
Instead of answering, Trion put his hands on her shoulders and held her, a wild look in his eyes. “You’re safe! I was so worried. I knew it was a mistake to let Mereel take you out of the Fortress. Look! It’s just like I warned you - your enemies will take advantage of any weakness and now look what happened because you left the Fortress!”
Guilt bit deeper into Satine. “But what is going on outside? How far have they gotten into the city?”
“It doesn’t matter. The Fortress will withstand them until they’re driven away.”
It struck Satine hard when she realized that Trion - her head advisor, a person she had trusted her entire life - didn’t care. She twisted out of his grip and stepped away from him. “You... you haven’t even checked, have you? Our people are dying out there!”
“All violence is to be avoided.”
Satine opened her mouth to reply, but... nothing. She had no words. So she turned and started running back to the entrance of the Fortress, leaving Trion well behind.
As she ran, Satine was left alone. People were better occupied with more important things than questioning where she was going. When she arrived at the doors of the Fortress, she stood aside while people streamed in. There were children being herded along by teenagers, who were clearly itching to join the battle, but had been relegated to looking after the youngsters. There were elderly people and it appeared that another clinic had evacuated their sick and wounded. And then she saw a familiar face - one of the Fortress guards.
“Metek!” He was being carried by two verde and seeing him made Satine realize who she hadn’t seen since returning to the Fortress. She went to walk next to him as he was being carried. “Where’s Nole? Metek, where’s your riduur?”
Metek’s head lolled weakly towards her and, with his eyes fluttering as he hovered on the edge of consciousness, he said, “Home. She’s at home.”
Home? Satine stopped walking and Metek was carried on, probably to the infirmary. Satine walked back to the doors of the Fortress and looked out. There were battles in the street and in the air. The noise was terrible. The sound of explosions and the steady, repetitive sound of rapid-fire heavy artillery. And Nole was at home. Alone. Metek could certainly not go to her.
Satine went cold.
Nole was pregnant.
Since the day Satine had arrived on Mandalore, Nole had been Satine’s maid and, as the years had passed, she had grown to trust Nole. She was quiet and efficient and while they weren’t friends - Satine wouldn’t be so presumptuous as to think such a thing - Satine did like her. Nole had always been kind, far kinder than most people had been. Kinder than she’d needed to be. She helped Satine dress if Satine needed to wear one of the more ornate outfits for some function. She would help keep Satine’s rooms tidy and had always been willing to run little errands if Satine needed something done.
Nole was pregnant and alone and she had been kind.
While people kept hurrying into the Fortress, Satine slipped out. She needed to find Nole.
To Be Continued...
Verd - warrior
Verde - warriors
Jetii - Jedi
Jetii’kad - lightsaber
Jetiise - multiple Jedi
Ade - children
Vod - sibling / comrade
Vode - siblings / comrades
Buir - parent
Riduur - spouse