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His Grindr profile says: i can take your tongue to places you can’t even imagine
Stede is intrigued. The last six months since he finally gave in and started online dating (“dating”) have been a whirlwind. There’s always some lovely person eager to get fucked, and Stede is eager to fuck them. And nothing, absolutely nothing, makes him happier than eating them out.
He is voracious. He wants to feel the way he feels when his mouth is full of someone moaning and begging for more all the time, to feel wanted and powerful and good. He’s even been fucking people who aren’t cisgender men, which is incredible, because he’s been fantasizing about only cis men for forty-eight years minus prepubescence. As long as they have an ass to eat, Stede is there with bells on. As the two sporadic years of sex in his twenty year marriage went, Stede would have put eating Mary out at the very tip-top of that list. So perhaps he shouldn’t have been surprised.
He loves sucking cock too, because it really is his mouth that gives him the most pleasure. He used to take ages to come even with himself, and he’s come hands free while pleasuring someone thirteen times since this all started. Thirteen!
So yes, Stede loves using his mouth, be it hole or pole. Kissing is also amazing, although he’s pickier about that since he’s not the only one physically driving the interaction. He’s yet to connect with anyone he’d like to actually be with more than physically, but that makes the whole thing so much easier.
And here is eddddd 😝🍑 claiming he can take Stede’s tongue to new heights.
Rimming is an artform, and Stede likes to call himself an enthusiastic amateur. Some folks just like the rim in rimming, which is of course very satisfying and fun. Others like it when Stede’s tongue is inside of them, and Stede loves that so much, to feel so deeply invited inside of another person, to wring their pleasure out of them from the inside out. When it’s regular old stick-a-cock-in-it penetration, he feels similarly, but the fact remains he’s got a preference for using his mouth to chase his own bliss.
Stede flips through Ed’s pictures. He’s strikingly beautiful, big brown eyes, beard not quite close-cropped but close, threaded with silver. His hair is long and similarly salt-and-pepper, thick and glorious. Stede is really not picky when it comes to looks, but if he cobbled together his almost half a century of fantasy with the last six months of unreal reality, eddddd 😝🍑 might just actually be his dream man.
Especially if he can deliver on his promises.
Hello!
hiya
How are you today? Did you get caught in the rain at all?
nah. just bummed around my apartment and heckled some people on fortnite
wbu?
Stede has to look up what that acronym means on Urban Dictionary. He has learned much faster the ways of a fully realized sexual being than he has the intricacies of internet lingo.
I’m reading right now, and although I did get wet earlier, I’m feeling very cozy with the pitter patter outside my window.
reading? is that what they call grindr now?
Oh hush. I can take social media breaks.
social media? idk if i’d call grindr social media
It’s social, and we send each other pictures, which is technically media.
touche
speaking of which…
Stede grins and sends his favorite dick pic. He had actually hired Lucius to take it, with lighting and everything. It features him from tits to knees, lounging on a plush dark royal blue velvet background. He even had his nails painted to match, a lovely shimmering gold, since Lucius did specifically mention good grooming is very important if you want to take your dick pics to the next level.
(He had met Lucius at the start of his escapades and learned a lot from him. Eventually Lucius regretfully had to tell Stede he had come out on the other side of “enthusiastic baby gay” to “baby gay who’s too much like a dad,” so they had stopped hooking up. But Lucius was a fantastic reference, and Stede has had fun with a lot of his friends.)
ho-ly fuck
is that VELVET?
Yes!
Devore velvet, specifically.
you’re a lunatic huh
i like it 🙂
I would love to show you the velvet in person ;)
But I will admit before your beauty it was your tagline that caught my eye.
you want to get up in this hairy hole?
Almost certainly yes.
Picture please?
Ed sends a hole pic so beautiful Stede is rendered nearly breathless.
Besides its beauty, what’s so special about it?
i’m better at showing than telling
You tease.
I would love to make you dinner.
And have a snack beforehand ;)
is the snack my ass
Yes.
can you host?
Yes!
tonight?
I’m ready when you are.
what’s your address
Stede sends it to him.
be there in an hour and a half
❤️
~*~
Ed shows up ten minutes late. He’s even more gorgeous in person, especially as he pulls his hair out of his bun to shake some of the rain out of it.
“Didn’t you bring an umbrella?”
“I don’t know where my umbrella is, to be honest.”
“You can have one of mine when you leave if it’s still raining.”
Ed’s been putting his hair back up, but he pauses for a moment. “Thanks.”
Stede brings him into the living room and sits him down on his favorite couch, the ballet slipper pink sectional with an extra wide chaise.
“Would you like a drink?”
“Water would be great.”
“Ice or no ice?”
“No ice.”
Stede comes back with two glasses of water and hands Ed’s to him.
“So you’re an ice man?” Ed nods at Stede’s glass. “Why?”
“Hmm…” Stede swirls the ice around in his drink, enjoying the clink and tinkle of it hitting the sides of the glass. “I think in light of recent events, it’s because my mouth enjoys a fair amount of sensation. I like my liquids ice cold or piping hot.”
“Even come?”
Stede laughs. “I’ve never had cold come before. Why, is that something you’re into?”
“No. I don’t think so?” Ed laughs. “You’re fucking weird, man.”
Sometimes Stede’s hackles raise if his hookups try to tease him in ways that hit too close to his bullied-childhood home, but from Ed, he feels complimented.
“I bet you like pulp, too,” Ed says.
“I do!”
“So what do you mean, ‘in light of recent events?’”
Stede gives an overview of his life so far: unhappy heterosexual marriage, coming out, finding his groove in the community over the last half a year.
Ed whistles. “The ‘ST’ in Stede stands for ‘service top.’ That should be your Grindr tagline.”
Stede makes a mental note to text Lucius and ask what a service top is later.
“I live to please.”
“Welp,” Ed says, setting his drink down. “Shall we?”
Stede smiles, sets his own glass down, and leans in to kiss Ed. For all that kissing sometimes doesn’t do it for him, Stede knows most folks do like it.
Kissing Ed, though? Kissing Ed is perfect .
Stede gives a delighted gasp and reaches up to grip Ed’s face. He threads the tips of his fingers into the short, luscious curls on the back of Ed’s neck. Ed is marvelous , taking the lead, letting Stede know exactly how he wants to be kissed with only his own lips and tongue.
“Mmm,” Ed says into Stede’s mouth. Stede is already hard as a rock, and both of them are still fully clothed.
God, he could do this for hours, just this. He’s never had someone so in sync with him with just kissing. The noises Ed is making are already obscene, satisfied little “Mms,” and “Nngs.” Stede cannot wait to see what other delightful sounds he can draw from him when his tongue is inside him.
They do go at it for a long time, half an hour maybe, Stede’s not sure. He’s never been less interested in checking the time. They’ve slowly stripped out of their clothes and now they’re in just their underwear, Stede in his hot pink and cornflower blue Andrew Christian briefs and Ed in a jet black jockstrap.
Stede’s fingers have admittedly meandered a few times, squeezing into the flesh of Ed’s ass, brushing against his hole. Ed has made encouraging noises each time, so Stede gets bold with it, wiggling the tip of his middle finger just inside. He’s intrigued, with Ed so tight, how he plans to “take his tongue to places unimaginable,” but at this point he doesn’t care about the bravado. He’s enjoying himself immensely just with making out.
Ed’s cock also looks lovely through the jock, but Stede hasn’t touched it yet. He’ll see if Ed requests it at whatever point, but otherwise he’s content to stick to the back door. Hopefully to stick it in the back door, but whatever Ed would prefer.
Ed pulls back and groans, panting a little bit. His eyes are so, so lovely, and Stede has a wild idea that he wants to lick them. He doesn’t actually want to do that, but his tongue sometimes has a mind of its own.
“I don’t even usually like this much kissing with a hookup,” Ed says. “You’re a really fucking good kisser.”
Stede nuzzles his nose into Ed’s. “Right back at you, sweetheart.”
They kiss again, but Stede’s mouth wants to wander, so he says, “Where else do you want me to kiss you?”
“Ass,” Ed says immediately. “But, like, on the way… wherever you want. Some teeth is great. Take a nipple detour.”
Stede presses Ed onto his back on the couch. He starts to move his mouth down Ed’s face, enjoying the tickle and scent of his beard, scraping his teeth and tongue against the stubble on his neck. He sucks a light bruise just above his pulse point, something that probably won’t even show up on his skin tone, but just enough that he will hopefully enjoy the little present from Stede’s mouth once he’s gone.
He makes his way down Ed’s chest, tracing tattoos with his tongue, swirling and circling, nipping and nibbling. Ed has his hands in Stede’s hair, and he’s saying little more than “Fuck” and “Yeah” but Stede is immediately fluent in each intonation and its directives.
He spends a good amount of time getting acquainted with Ed’s nipples. He has open-circle hoop piercings in them, and Stede is having a field day twisting them around and pushing them gently back and forth through the piercing hole, scraping his teeth along the nipple and metal, sucking hard, and then soft, and then hard again. Ed’s fucks are coming faster and his yeahs are getting louder.
Finally Stede reaches Ed’s stomach, and he kisses a line down the trail from his chest hair to where it disappears under the band of his jock strap.
“What’s your favorite position?” Stede murmurs into Ed’s sweating, scrumptious skin.
“I brought a rimming chair.”
Stede’s head snaps up. “A what now?”
Ed’s grin is shark-like. “It’s a chair. For rimming.”
Stede is a little miffed at having things explained to him like he’s a child, but mostly he’s just very, very horny.
“Show me?”
Ed grins again, knees Stede gently off, and throws on his tempting mid-thigh sweat shorts. “Be right back.” He saunters out of Stede’s front door and returns moments later with the promised rimming chair.
It’s a toilet seat, basically, propped up on two horizontal support bars, two vertical bars under that, and two more horizontal bars that sit on the ground. There are handles to grip on either side of the seat.
“It extends our comfort. I have more muscle control when I don’t have to use my core at all,” Ed explains. “And it’s also just a good position. I sit, and you get under me.”
“I see.”
“Your dick just jumped.”
“She’s very excited to make your acquaintance.”
“She?”
“Dame Judi Dench.”
Ed snorts. “Why?”
“She’s an award-winning queen.”
Ed laughs outright. “Aren’t you newly out? Already winning awards?”
“I can give you references.”
“Damn, Stede. Let’s see what you can do.”
They get settled in the promised positions and Stede understands immediately what Ed meant by extending their comfort. His neck won’t be strained, laying down like this with his head supported on a pillow, and Ed only has to sit upright, not keep himself perched on all fours or hold his legs up for easier access like he would on his back. He’s spread for Stede already, everything covered in coarse, dark hair. If it’s as delicious as the rest of Ed’s body hair, Stede might actually fall in love.
He reaches up and kneads into Ed’s hips above him. “Do you want me to tease you, or just get right to it?”
He can see Ed’s hole clench. “How long have you got in the tongue tank?”
“My record is two hours so far.”
“Mother of fuck,” Ed groans. “Then yeah. Take your time.”
“Is it alright if I massage you a little bit first?”
“Go for it.”
Stede reaches up and starts by massaging the meat of Ed’s ass. He digs his thumbs in, squeezes with his hands, pushes in with the heels of his palms. He gets closer and closer to Ed’s hole with his thumbs, swerves to massage his taint, moves them inch by inch back to his rim. He presses in, slides the pads softly against the nerve endings there, repeats all that a few times before he starts to rub into it with increasing pressure. Ed’s hole is winking at him, pulsing ever so slightly open and closed with each press of Stede’s thumbs.
“Fuck, man,” Ed groans. “That feels fucking incredible.”
Stede is salivating now, desperate to taste, but Ed seems to be enjoying himself too much for Stede to want to entirely stop what he’s doing. He can get the oral started, though. Still massaging, he makes his lips into a tight O and blows cold air around Ed’s hole. He leans up to get closer and opens his mouth wider and blows hot air. Ed gives a sharp gasp of pleasure.
Stede continues to blow air upward, switching from hot to cold, not sticking to one place of focus, keeping Ed on his toes (as it were). He blows lines from side to side, up and down, zigzagging and circling.
“Okay, okay–” Ed pants. “Get your hands out from under there, I’m gonna lower the seat–”
Stede obeys, reaching up and gripping the handles. Ed lifts himself upward and adjusts the seat downward. He sits down gently.
“Good?” he asks.
Stede feels like he’s looking into the face of god. “Gorgeous,” he breathes. Ed’s hole is so close he won’t have to lift his head off the pillow at all to access it. He moves his hands from the handles to the sides of the seat and licks out with his tongue.
Assholes don’t tend to taste like much except skin and soap, but something about Ed is ineffably scrumptious from the very first taste. It could be the noises he’s making, short gasps and encouraging grunts. It could be the way his thumbs sometimes stray from the handles to brush against Stede’s hands. It could just be Ed.
Stede starts slow, running the flat and then the tip of his tongue in loose, languid circles. He does this for a long time, getting Ed (and himself) well and truly riled, before he shifts to licking stripes. Like with the blowing, he switches things up without a predictable pattern. Ed seems to really particularly like when Stede flutters the tip of his tongue against him, so he does that for a long, long time.
“Yeah, yes, just like that, oooohh fuck–Yeah, yeah, yeah–Little more pressure, that’s right, just like that just like that justlikethat–”
Stede beams, knowing he’s doing well. Ed is still tight above him, but he doesn’t care; he’d do this, just this, all night or until his tongue fell off (whichever comes first. As to whoever comes first–he doesn’t think either of them are really orgasm-focused, which also pleases him to his core).
“Okay– fuck, Stede– okay. Now I’m gonna–”
Like a blooming rose, Ed’s hole opens to him. Stede feels a little choked up at the sight of it, opening for him . At will . He’s had bottoms who could do this with this much control, but not many. He pokes his tongue carefully inside, leaves it there for a few moments, pulsing it ever so slightly before he withdraws and goes back to circling. He swirls his tongue around and around and around, getting very, very slightly more inside on each pass, a move he likes to call the Spiral Wishing Well Coin Spinning Fundraising Funnel.
Ed seems to like it, groaning a continuous, “Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck–”
When Stede’s gone just about as deep as he can get, he withdraws again. He starts to poke his tongue in and out, perhaps not quite tongue-fucking, but definitely tongue-thrusting.
“Faster, faster–”
Stede obliges, burying his face fully into Ed’s sweet musk, moving his tongue in and out as fast and vigorously as he’s able.
That’s when Ed clenches around his tongue.
Stede gasps, stops, gets his bearings.
“You like that?” Ed says, smug as a cat.
In response, Stede dives back in, not thrusting any more, just getting deep, wiggling his tongue, waiting for Ed to do that again. Ed knows exactly what he wants, rippling around him. He starts by pushing himself open and then clamping around Stede, again and again. He is massaging Stede’s tongue with his hole. And then, and then, he starts giving him levels, open, half-shut, fully clamped, slowing it down so eventually it’s just one continuous wave.
Stede is ecstatic . Stede is delirious. Stede is getting light-headed.
That’s when he blacks out.
“Stede? Stede??”
Stede blinks, a little confused. “Oh dear. I think I forgot to breathe for a moment there.”
“Do you want to stop?”
“No!” Stede says so emphatically Ed barks out a laugh of surprise. “Unless you want to?”
“Absolutely the fuck not.”
So they resume. Things ebb and flow, as they are wont to do. Ed likes to be sucked, but only in short bursts. Every so often he likes a break from the main event and to be massaged again, which gives Stede some time to work the cramps out of his tongue. They play a game where Ed clenches as tight as he can and Stede tries to punch his tongue inside. He gets in once, and Ed assures him that’s very impressive. But his tongue is very tired, and once is all he can handle.
“We’ll have to train you up,” Ed gasps.
Stede’s heart skips a beat at the thought of getting to do this again.
It’s been at least an hour now and unfortunately, Stede is losing steam. He hadn’t known he was going to do this tonight, hadn’t done his exercises to prepare himself. He’s had Ed sobbing and wailing and moaning and whimpering, but now Ed is mostly just giving the same little satisfied “Mms” he was when they had just been making out.
Stede drops his head back, exhausted.
“Finished?” Ed says.
“For now,” Stede says reluctantly. “I’m so sorry.”
Ed chuckles above him. “Love, that was unreal. You have nothing to apologize for.”
He gets off the chair and in one fluid motion helps Stede up and tugs him onto the couch. Stede’s arms automatically circle around him and Ed snuggles in.
“Hope this is okay,” Ed says. “I like a bit of a cuddle afterward.”
“More than,” Stede murmurs. They don’t speak, just hold each other. Stede can feel himself dozing when Ed speaks again.
“Were you serious about dinner?”
“Hm?”
“You said you’d make me dinner.”
Stede laughs quietly. “It’s a line. I don’t cook.”
“Ah.”
“We could order something?”
Ed looks up, smiling wide and unguarded. “Sounds perfect.”