Chapter Text
Alec bites his nail as he and his foster mom, Gwen, drive slowly through town. The snow is light but steady, the roads are slick from ice, and she’d never felt comfortable driving in these conditions. They’d both tried to call Alec’s caseworker but Mia hadn’t answered either of their calls. Not that it mattered much anyway.
A few weeks before he turned eighteen, Alec had been convinced Gwen and Zach were going to kick him out of the house. He’d already completed high school back in June but was required to stay until he turned eighteen. Gwen and Zach had surprised him by telling him he could stay and they’d get aid from the state until he turned twenty-one as long as he went to college. He’d gladly jumped on that opportunity, considering he had nowhere else to go.
Things had been going great. Alec had started his first semester at the local community college and was taking four classes. At the beginning of November though, everything changed. Zach had come home early after being laid off. The first few weeks weren’t too rough, at least for the kids, Alec and his foster sister, Nadine, and brother, Jesse. Alec did see Zach and Gwen whispering frantically when they thought the kids were all asleep but he didn’t think things were so bad. Zach would surely get a new job soon.
Only he didn’t. Those frantic whispers soon turned into banging doors and shouts, which turned into Zach shoving Alec out of the way in the hallways. Gwen tried to protect Alec from Zach’s anger and in turn Alec tried to protect the younger kids, but it didn’t matter. Zach wouldn’t stop complaining about how much money they wasted putting Alec to school when they could have sent him back to the agency. Thanksgiving was six days ago and it had been… awkward, to say the least.
All of it ended this morning when Zach screamed at Alec that he only let him stay after eighteen because Gwen loved him, to pack his shit, and for Gwen to drop him off “wherever.”
Alec wasn’t sure where they were going and, to be honest, he didn’t think she knew where they were going either. They’d left in a panic while Zach screamed and threw things and slammed doors. Alec had barely had time to hug a crying Nadine and Jesse goodbye.
Sighing, Alec rests his head against the window. “You hungry, baby?”
“Um,” Alec frowns. “Yeah.”
“How about we get something to eat while I try to figure something out?”
Alec’s frown deepens and he looks at her. “I don’t think we can afford that. Zach’s really mad.”
Gwen tries to smile at him but it looks forced. “Your dad is just frustrated, hon. We can get something cheap and I’ll pay in cash. I also want to get out of this snow for a little bit. How about some Taco Bell? I know it’s your favorite.”
“Yum,” Alec says despite the situation. “Can I get a bean burrito without beans and with extra sour cream?”
“You can have two.” Gwen smiles and turns into the parking lot. “And some of those cinnamon things you like so much.”
Alec doesn’t fail to miss that Gwen doesn’t order any food and he offers her one of his burritos but she waves her hand and says she’s not hungry. While he eats, Gwen continues to call Mia, with no luck. Mia had continued her visits to see Alec after he turned eighteen but they became less frequent as October passed and she didn’t show up once in November. She had other, younger kids to watch out for after all.
Mia had said she hit the jackpot with Gwen and Zach. Zach made good money and Gwen wanted to be a stay at home mom for Alec. They never officially adopted him but Alec grew up calling Gwen his mom. Zach didn’t like the idea of being called dad though.
When Alec first entered the foster care system as a two year old, there were many people that were interested in him, as he was still rather young, and his younger brother, Jace. The system wanted to keep them together but it didn’t take long before they realized Alec would be far more problematic to place. Robert and Maryse Lightwood had died in a car crash while taking Alec to the doctor. Jace hadn’t been in the car but Alec was. When the police got there, Robert and a pregnant Maryse were dead and Alec was screaming his head off for his mommy to wake up.
Alec of course didn’t remember any of that, but two year old him certainly did. He’d wake up screaming every night, had awful temper tantrums, and couldn’t get along with the other kids, not even Jace. A family adopted Jace and refused to take Alec and, desperate to get at least one kid out of the system, they allowed the two to be separated. All Alec has of Jace and the rest of his family are pictures.
Gwen and Zach happened just a few months after that. They couldn’t conceive and wanted to foster as many kids as they could. Gwen had been the one attracted to the sullen boy in the corner who played with an action figure while the rest of the kids ran around screaming and laughing. Zach had wanted a happier kid but Gwen stuck to her guns and insisted that she loved him on first sight.
When Alec was seven, Gwen asked him if he wanted her and Zach to adopt him and be his mommy and daddy. At the time, Alec still wanted to carry a piece of Maryse and Robert and Jace Lightwood with him, even if it was just his last name. There was also a fear that Jace might not be able to find him in the future if he wanted to. He’s starting to wish he’d just let them adopt him. He could have taken their last name. It wouldn’t have bothered him that much.
When they finish eating, they head back into the cold and snow and Gwen starts driving around again. They both try to call Mia but she never answers. Alec bites his lip. “Where am I going to go? I don’t have any money.”
“I can’t bring you back to the house.” Gwen shakes her head. “Your father is so angry right now, and it’s not your fault but he’s blaming you. I can’t let him fight with you in front of the kids and all my money is tied up in our credit cards. He’d know the moment I spent anything on you. Why isn’t Mia answering my calls?!”
Alec looks down at his phone. “She’s probably out of the office and she’s not answering her cell either. She’s probably with some of her other kids, checking to make sure they’re safe and stuff. I’m sure she’ll call us back soon.”
Gwen hums but doesn’t say anything. Alec wasn’t sure what Mia could do even if they were able to get ahold of her. He was able to stay in foster care until twenty-one but only if he stays in school. The end of semester is in December and they’re quickly approaching it. He had no way of paying for another semester of school. Mia wouldn’t be able to find a placement with someone who would be willing to help him stay in school. He’d have to work and without a college education, it’d be pretty bad.
The phone rings in the car and Gwen clicks on the button on the dash. “Mia?!”
“Where the fuck are you?” Gwen and Alec glance at each other when Zach’s voice fills the car. “Nadine just vomited and Jesse slammed his door and is throwing things in his room. I need you to come home and take care of it. Where’d you drop off the brat?”
Gwen throws Alec a hurt look before she says, “Don’t you call our son a brat. Clean up the vomit yourself and tell Jesse to calm down. Mia isn’t answering our phone calls and I don’t know where to take Alec. If you’ll just let me bring him—”
“No!” Zach shouts, making the two of them jump. “I’m done with this shit, Gwen! I didn’t want to adopt him in the first place. I wanted a normal kid and you just had to pick the kid that was broken, didn’t you?” Alec sinks lower in his seat and he stares at his phone, trying not to cry. “They told us all about his nightmares and tantrums and I didn’t want him but you did so I shut the fuck up about it. Why do you think no one else wanted to take him? No one wanted to put up with his shit! Goddamn, he’s fucking eighteen and I’ve probably seen him smile three times his whole life!”
“How dare you?” Gwen’s voice sounds wet. “He’s your son!”
“He’s not my son. I didn’t want to keep him until he was eighteen, but you made me. I didn’t want to send him to college, but you insisted upon it. I absolutely did not want to adopt him but you begged me to start the paperwork. Thank fucking god he refused to let us adopt him. That was the happiest day of my life.”
Alec feels tears well up in his eyes and he throws his phone to the floor. He looks out the window and tries not to cry as Gwen lays a hand on his shoulder. “I don’t have anywhere to take him unless I can pay for a motel for the night while we try to get a hold of Mia.”
“Stop it, Gwen.” Zach growls. “Drive him to the library and let him off. They’re open until ten tonight and Mia can pick him up there. He’ll be perfectly safe sitting in the library and waiting for a ride from the person who’s actually supposed to take care of him. Maybe while he’s there he can be smart and instead of sulk, he could look for jobs online. It’s time for him to grow up. He’s not owed an education or job. If he wants one, he can get it like the rest of us.”
“Zach, please—”
The phone hangs up and Gwen rubs Alec’s shoulder but he doesn’t look at her. “Don’t listen to him, honey. He loves you so much. He’s just angry right now about losing his job. We’ll find a place for you tonight and I’ll talk to him. Once he finds another job or I find one, everything’s going to be fine.”
“Just drop me off at the library.”
Gwen sighs. “That’s not a good idea. What if Mia doesn’t get in contact with you before the library closes?”
“There’s a coffee shop two doors down.” Alec mutters. “It’s open twenty-four hours. I can wait for her there if she doesn’t get back to me by the time they close. I’ve got a couple of my books in my bags.”
“If I…”
Gwen doesn’t finish her sentence and soon enough, they’re pulling up in front of the library. Alec reaches down and grabs his duffle bag. He reaches for the door but Gwen touches his shoulder. She pulls her wallet out of her purse and counts out the money that’s in there. “I’ve got… 185 dollars. That’ll buy you some coffee while you wait and a room if you need one. Call me if you need a ride or can’t find somewhere to stay.”
Alec doesn’t take the money. “Zach will be angry with you if you give me that money. You need it for groceries for you and the kids.”
“It’s my money to do with as I wish.” Gwen shoves the bills into his hands. “Alec, I want you to know that what he said was wrong. I didn’t choose the broken child. I chose you because you needed a little bit more help than all the others. You’re not broken. You’re angry, you’re hurt, and you’re frustrated. You watched your mother and father die, even if you don’t remember it clearly. Yes, you’ve only smiled a handful of times since I came into your life. But I’ve always seen those smiles as a gift. You’re my gift.”
“Thanks, mom.” Alec clears his throat and wipes at his eyes. He grabs the door handle again, picks up his phone and duffle bag, and steps out of the car. From the backseat, he grabs his bookbag and then slams the door. “I’ll uh, see you later, I guess. Can you make sure Zach doesn’t throw out the stuff that I had to leave behind?”
“Of course, hon. Let me get out and give you a hug.”
Alec knew if she gave him a hug, he’d probably start crying right there in front of the library. “Don’t worry about it, it’s fine. I’ll see you after I talk to Mia. Love you, mom.”
After slamming the door shut, Alec turns on his heel and races towards the library doors to get out of the cold and snow. Once inside, he glances back to see Gwen’s car still idling in front of the library. He waves and walks far enough inside so she won’t be able to see him.
Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. He had no idea what to do.