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Something was wrong. Oh so very wrong. Changeling physiology was still rather misunderstood, and even Odo didn’t know the full details of his own biology. However, he could always tell when something was wrong. And now, something was definitely wrong.
It all started one day, at total random it seemed, when he ‘dropped by’ the bar for his usual check-ins with the local bartender. Just to make sure that he wasn’t doing anything illegal, and to step in when he inevitably was.
‘Hello, Quark,’ He said, in his usual patronising tone.
If Quark had noticed him coming in (which he definitely did because he always did), he didn’t look it. He continued with his work, pouring a couple extra drinks, before he bothered to pay him any mind. The moment he finished pouring the last drink and put the bottle down, he looked Odo right in the eye. It wasn’t in a confrontational way. At least, not entirely. There was another thing to that look that Odo couldn’t quite identify.
To his displeasure, Quark was grinning.
‘Now what has compelled our Constable to drop by this time?’ He asked.
There was something about his tone of voice that seemed a little odd. On the surface, it sounded like your typical passive-aggressive annoyance. As per the norm, really. And yet, there was the slightest hint of… genuine joy? That couldn’t be right. Not that it mattered anyway, because Odo had more pressing matters to attend to. Ignoring that strange tone, and that odd look in his eyes, Odo launched into his typical accusation of the day.
Or, at least, he tried to.
Nothing came out of his approximated mouth. Absolutely nothing. His eyes widened, and he tried again. Still nothing. Not even half-formed words or animalistic cries or anything. Just pure silence.
‘Uh, Odo, are you okay?’ Quark asked. ‘You seem kind of… tongue-tied. Which is weird, seeing as you don’t have much of a tongue.’
Odo wanted to respond with a thousand different snide remarks, only for more silence to come out instead. Panic began to set in. No matter what he tried to say, there was nothing. Not even a cry of frustration.
‘Is this some… weird new interrogation technique or something? Because I don’t think it’s working.’
He did a damn good job at conveying his rage (and terror) through his expressions alone, but it didn’t seem to be having any effect on Quark. Why couldn’t he speak? The panic overwhelming him sent him running out of the bar at a breakneck pace.
‘Uh, we’ll chat later, I guess!’ Quark said as he ran off. ‘… But I didn’t do whatever it was you were trying to accuse me off!’
Odo didn’t stop running until he got back into his office, where the panic died down only slightly. For a moment, he was afraid to talk again, in case nothing but nothing came out again.
‘Testing, testing…’ He murmured, before he let out a (rather pointless) sigh of relief. ‘Good. I can talk again. … So why couldn’t I…?’
He groaned and sat down behind his desk, deciding that he could deal with this later. No use in interrogating Quark if his speech could suddenly stop working. At least this situation wasn’t urgent; just some suspicious non-living cargo. Something he could easily deal with later, when this ‘speech glitch’ was taken care of.
So why did his speech continue to work throughout the rest of the day?
After he emerged from his regeneration period the next day, with no speech glitches in sight, Odo decided that it was just a weird one-off. Albeit, a weird one-off that he was going to be on the watch for. Regardless, he had an important matter to attend to. Speech glitch or not.
So he went straight to the bar. The incident the day before had set him back, and he really needed to sort out this ‘interesting’ cargo. Or at least give the Captain proof that Quark did it, because apparently accusing that crook all the time was a bad thing to do.
Quark must’ve memorised the sound of his footsteps, because his back was turned and Odo said nothing, and yet the guy spun around the second Odo stepped into the bar. The thought that he had visited this bar enough for Quark to recognise his footsteps was… an interesting thought, to say the least.
‘Oh, Constable!’ Quark said, with that infuriating grin. ‘Are you talking again? Frankly, I think I prefer you when you’re silent.’
That grin. That Prophets-be-damned grin. It almost stopped Odo in his tracks for reasons he could not explain. Almost. He stormed into the bar to confront him.
‘Quark, I-‘
And that was as far as he got. Not because his speech stopped working again, because it was actually working just fine. No, it was because his knees stopped working. Next thing he knew, he was falling over onto the counter, with only his arms to catch him and break his fall. How bizarre and somewhat alarming; it wasn’t like him to just fall over for no reason. Especially when there was nothing to actually trip on.
‘Woah, Odo!’ Quark said. ‘You okay there? … I didn’t think Changelings could get drunk, but there you go.’
Odo let out a long and frustrated groan. ‘I’m not drunk, Quark. I just-’
He looked down at his legs as he picked himself up, only to wobble over again. While most of his body had maintained humanoid shape, his recreated knees certainly had not. They were halfway through to melting into a liquid state, just barely keeping it together.
Quark peered over the counter. ‘Are they supposed to do that?’
‘Of course not!’ Odo replied, more forcefully than he intended. ‘I don’t know why that’s happening. They’re not supposed to-’
He tried to look Quark in the eye, for just a moment, and that was apparently a terrible idea. His speech completely stopped working once again. Whatever the rest of the sentence was meant to be, it came out as nothing. He slammed his fist into the counter; why was his speech dying while he was trying to interrogate Quark?! That was the worst possible time!
‘Seriously, are you okay?’ Quark asked. ‘First it was the talking, and now your knees. What is going on?’
Odo couldn’t answer that question, and not just because his speech had died again. Even if he could speak, he had no idea what the answer was. But he was going to interrogate this idiot even if it killed him (and it might). So he seized Quark by his shirt and… what the hell was that?
‘Uh, Odo?’
He looked down at his ‘stomach’. Of course, there was no organ there; just goop. So it shouldn’t have felt any different to the rest of his body. And yet, he could feel something very strange. A fluttering sensation, of all things. If he had to put it into words, it was as if the goop in his ‘stomach’ had a mind of its own and had morphed itself into a vaguely… butterfly-like shape. Butterfly?
‘Oh sweet Exchequer!’ Quark cried, with horror all over his face. ‘Odo, you’re… you’re going red!’
Odo let go and stared down at his hands. They were turning a bright shade of red. His ‘sleeves’, too, had a notable red tint to them. In fact, his whole body did. And now, everyone in the bar was looking at him.
‘I don’t know what the hell you’ve got,’ Quark said. ‘But it can’t be good.’
Odo slapped his combadge, but found himself totally unable to actually speak into it. He slammed his fist into the counter again in an attempt to channel the panic that was quickly overwhelming him. Quark sighed and leaned over to tap the combadge himself.
‘Quark to Julian.’
‘Uh, hello Quark. How did you-?’
‘Odo wanted to use it himself, but he’s… not able to right now. Something’s wrong with him, and it’s affecting his ability to speak. Which is nice for me, but it looks like it’s stressing him out.’
‘He’s unable to speak? Changeling physiology still eludes us, but the sudden inability to speak is bad no matter the species. Odo, if you’re still there, get down to the infirmary at once. It might not be serious, but we shouldn’t take any chances.’
Odo couldn’t agree more. Unfortunately, all attempts at leaving the bar were met with weak knees that sent him tumbling to the ground. After about five falls, he gave up and just dragged himself out of there.
Weirdly enough, the second he made it out of the bar, these strange symptoms began to relax. He could actually walk the rest of the way. In fact, they seemed to ease entirely by the time he left the promenade. Still, he made his way over to the infirmary; if it happened once, it could happen again.
‘... and it all stopped once I left the bar, but I’m worried that it could happen again.’
Odo described each of his symptoms to Julian, whose expression slowly progressed from ‘professional doctor’ to ‘wait hold on a moment what’ with each one that he heard. It wasn’t a look of worry, but instead confusion. Which was to be expected, really, seeing as Julian was working with a being whose biology he barely understood.
‘Hang on…’ He said. ‘Getting tongue-tied, weak knees, turning red… a fluttering in your stomach?’
‘I’m dying, aren’t I?’ Odo asked, sounding more annoyed than actually worried. ‘That’s what’s happening.’
Julian opened his mouth to say something, only to close it again when the words didn’t seem right. He repeated this process a couple of times before he finally figured out what to say.
‘Just out of curiosity…’ He said. ‘Did you suffer from these symptoms while in the presence of anyone in particular?’
Odo shot him a confused look. ‘... What? Why?’
‘I think the answer might explain it.’
Odo sighed, and Julian prepared himself for the awkward answer. The one he got was certainly not the one he was expecting, however.
‘It only seemed to happen while I was in the presence of…’ His eyes widened. ‘Quark.’
‘Quark?!’
Julian didn’t want to yell, but he couldn’t help it. Of all people, the bartender was just about the last one he was expecting. In hindsight, however, he probably should’ve seen it coming.
‘Of course…’ Odo murmured. ‘It’s all Quark’s fault! I don’t know how, but he must’ve set up an… energy field of some kind, that induces these strange symptoms in me whenever I enter the bar!’ He grumbled. ‘I knew he was willing to stoop low, but I didn’t think he’d stoop this low. He gives me one smile, and suddenly I can’t even put words together!’
He began to pace around the room, while Julian struggled to put his own words together. There was really no easy way to explain this, especially to an oblivious Changeling bent on convicting someone.
‘Of all the despicable…’ Odo said, still ranting. ‘I’m going to call him to my office right now and have him explain why he thought any of this was a good idea!’
He was just about to leave…
‘Odo, wait!’ Julian said, stopping him in his tracks. ‘I… don’t think calling Quark to your office is a good idea.’
‘Hmph! And why is that?’ Odo demanded, crossing his arms.
‘The… symptoms that you were suffering from were probably not caused by an energy field. You may be a Changeling, but what you’re suffering is very similar to what many Humanoids may experience in a… specific circumstance.’
‘Really? Heh. And what circumstance would that be?’
Julian took a deep breath. ‘It typically means that you have a crush on someone.’
What Julian saw next was truly astounding. He had never seen someone go through so many facial expressions in the span of just a few seconds. Confusion. Shock. Realisation. Disgust. Despair. Anger. Confusion again.
‘What?!’ Odo cried, once the words came back to him. ‘That is… why would… I… you can’t seriously be suggesting what I think you are.’
‘All I’m saying is that your symptoms are, for one reason or another, quite similar to what several Humanoid species experience when they have intense feelings for another person,’ Julian said. ‘And since you only had those symptoms when you were near Quark-’
‘I do not have feelings for Quark!’ Odo yelled, louder than he realised. ‘How could you even think I could?!’
Julian sighed; he wasn’t exactly the ‘love expert’ to begin with, and now he was dealing with someone who - when it came to love - was thick as a brick.
‘I’m not saying that you do for certain,’ He said. ‘But it is a very real possibility that you can’t ignore. Tell me, how often do you think about Quark?’
Odo scoffed. ‘Why is that important?’
‘Answer the question, Odo. How often do you think about him?’
‘Heh. Every second of the day.’
Julian’s eyes went wide. It was enough to render him speechless for a bit.
‘Alright,’ He said. ‘Do you ever wonder what he’s doing when you’re not watching him?’
‘All the time! He’s always causing some sort of trouble on board this station. And sometimes off it too.’
‘Do you drop by the bar constantly, even though you can’t eat or drink anything, just to talk to him?’
‘Doctor, you know how much of my life revolves around him.’
By this point, Julian was really finding it difficult to come up with things to say. The lack of self-awareness from someone usually so observant was truly stunning.
‘Odo, I will be frank with you,’ He said. ‘It’s quite unusual to think about someone that often unless you harbour some sort of feelings for them!’
Odo’s expression was interesting, to say the least. One part a bad realisation, one part disbelief, and one part ‘what is wrong with you’.
‘But I…’ He said, voice trailing. ‘He… O-Of course I think about him often! I have to. Do you know how often he gets into trouble?'
Julian sighed. ‘I don’t think Captain Ahab was as obsessed with Moby Dick as you are of Quark!’
‘… Captain who?’
‘It’s an old Earth tale. The point is, your obsession with Quark has to be due to more than simply making sure you catch him in the act!’
‘I-!’
Odo stopped himself right there, as if he just suddenly realised that Julian may have been right.
‘Let’s test something else,’ Julian said. ‘If it is just a strange energy field causing these symptoms, then you won’t suffer from them in here. Think about Quark for a moment. Think about his smile.’
Though perturbed enough as it was, Odo did as the doctor suggested. Perhaps it would answer his questions. Or raise even more. He pictured that image of Quark’s devious grin in his mind, his near-perfect memory catching every detail. Especially in those eyes that stared into him with far more passion than they-
Odo emitted a sound much like a gasp. His ‘stomach’ was fluttering. His ‘skin’ was turning red. He had to lean up against a wall when his knees got weak. When he tried to voice his worries to Julian, no words came out.
‘Well, look at that,’ Julian said. ‘Unless Quark somehow installed a field generator in the infirmary, I think my theory has been proven.’
Odo got that image of Quark out of his mind, and - slowly - the symptoms subsided. He stared into space with absolute horror.
‘I have feelings for Quark…’ He murmured. ‘I have feelings… for Quark.’
‘You sound surprised, Odo,’ Julian said. ‘Frankly, with how often you manhandle him, it’s a surprise that it’s taken this long for it to really sink in.’
Odo didn’t reply. He hardly even listened. The world was beginning to fade away. Next thing Julian knew…
*THUD*
… his patient fell to the floor in an unconscious heap.
‘ODO!’
It took awhile for Odo to come to, but he wasn’t any happier for it. If anything, he just seemed more panicked, pacing around the infirmary and giving Julian little-to-no chance to jump in.
‘Odo, I-‘ He tried to say.
‘What am I supposed to do? What can I do?’ Odo rambled to himself. ‘How am I meant to deal with him now if… if his grin is so alluring that I can’t even speak?! I thought it was bad with the Major, but this… this?! And if he ever finds out, I’m done for.’
He stopped pacing around for a moment. Julian thought he had the opportunity to speak, but Odo cut him off again.
‘Please, Doctor,’ He said, practically pleading. ‘I can’t perform my duties like this. You have to do something - anything - to get this to stop. Of all the people to be attracted to, why Quark?!’
Even saying his name brought that stupid fluttering back.
‘I’m not sure what you want me to do,’ Julian said. ‘Even if I could do something to get rid of a crush, I have no idea how your physiology would respond.’
‘… Is there a non-medical way to get out of this?’
‘Well, you have two solutions. One, you could try getting over this crush. That would require you to act like nothing’s wrong.’
Odo’s eyes darted around. ‘That’s… going to be difficult, seeing as I turn red when I’m near him.’
‘The other solution is to attempt an actual relationship with him.’
Odo couldn’t reply to this. Not even with a strong ‘no’. He simply stared at the floor, as if debating all of his options and how good they were.
‘The real question is,’ Julian said. ‘Do you want to be in a relationship with him? Starting a relationship just to resolve a crush is bound to end poorly.’
‘…’
‘You’re not just saying no.’
‘That’s what worries me. Why can’t I say no?’
‘Of all the people to ask for romantic advice, why me?’
Odo flashed him a worried look, before staring at the floor again. That floor was going to crumble under his stare at this rate.
‘Well, you’re the only other person in the room right now,’ He said. ‘And you already know what’s happening to me. I can’t exactly go to someone else for advice.’ He let out a humourless chuckle. ‘Hey, Captain, I think I have feelings for Quark. What should I do about it! The whole station would know about it before my regeneration cycle was finished.’
The other reason was that Julian had a bit of experience when it came to dating someone of another species. Someone who was well known for his questionable past and actions. But Odo wasn’t sure how he’d react if he brought that up.
‘Since you’re asking me,’ Julian said. ‘I’d say that your lack of a definitive ‘no’ is a sign that you should try it. What have you got to lose? And no, ‘dignity’ is not an answer.’
Suddenly, Odo stood up even straighter than he usually did. Which didn’t even seem possible.
‘I’m going to do it,’ He said. ‘I’m going to - attempt to - start a relationship with him.’
Julian was taken just a little aback. ‘You’re that sure about it?'
‘W-Well, it would make it easier to keep an eye on him.’
‘Uh huh. Right.’
This was apparently Odo-ese for ‘I might actually like him for real but I will not admit that even to myself’.
‘So when do you want to do that?’ Julian asked.
‘Right now.’
‘Now?’
‘Now!’
The very moment Odo stood just outside the bar, before Quark was even in his sights, he was already regretting his life choices. Just thinking about that crook was making his knees lose their shape.
‘This is a bad idea,’ He muttered.
‘You told me not to talk you out of this,’ Julian said, standing right behind him. ‘And you’ve come this far. You might as well keep going.’
‘But what if…’
Odo knew he looked ridiculous, standing outside the bar with the doctor right behind him, not talking another step forward. A few people walked by with looks of concern on their faces, as if confused about why the Constable wasn’t going through with his usual routine of annoying the hell out of Quark.
‘I think you’re worried about being rejected,’ Julian said.
‘Is that what this is? Great,’ Odo said with a frustrated huff. ‘This is ridiculous. Why am I so worried about this? I… I don’t care. … Maybe I shouldn’t bother.’
‘There’s a saying back on Earth. You miss all the shots you don’t take.’
‘I understand that, but that doesn’t help.’
‘You know what you need? A little push.’
Odo was expecting a more metaphorical kind of push, so you can imagine how shocked it was when Julian gave him a good shove and pushed him into the bar. Before Odo could turn around and threaten him with charges (for pushing a security officer), he realised that Quark had already seen him. That grin was on his face for a split second, before he appeared annoyed to see him.
Now that Odo got a better look at that expression, it seemed rather fake. As though Quark actually enjoyed his ‘company’ and was merely pretending to be irritated. But surely that was just Odo’s apparent ‘feelings’ for him clouding his judgement. Surely.
Kira and Jadzia were there too, sitting by the bar. Luckily, they were mostly busy talking to each other, and so hopefully they wouldn’t notice what he was about to do.
‘Going for a third try, huh?’ Quark said. ‘Alright. Maybe this time, you’ll manage to accuse me without doing… whatever it was you were doing before.’
Odo looked back at a smiling Julian just to give him a nasty glare, before he embarked further into the bar. It was a routine he was so used to; showing up for the sole purpose of annoying the bartender. After all, he didn’t need to eat or drink. Gambling had no appeal to him. And the less said about the holosuite programs, the better. The more he thought about this, the more he realised that - maybe, just maybe - he should’ve realised these feelings long before he started showing ‘symptoms’ of it.
‘Quark,’ Odo said, in his usual Constable tone. ‘There’s something very serious we need to talk about.’
Quark sighed. ‘Every time you say that, it always ends badly for me.’
‘Well, if you’re lucky, it might just end-’
He tumbled over, almost crashing into the bar once again. His knees were giving up on him once again. It was something that didn’t make sense to him, whether talking about solids or Changelings. Why would romantic or sexual attraction affect the knees? Or the stomach? Or the skin? Or-
‘You’re still doing that?’ Quark asked. ‘Look, if you’re going to melt into a gooey puddle in my bar, the least you could do is move somewhere where no one will see it.’
‘Are you feeling alright, Odo?’ Kira asked.
Oh great. Now Kira and Dax were looking at him. As if this situation wasn’t any more painful.
‘I’m fine, Major,’ He said, doing his best attempt at lying. ‘There’s just something that I want to tell-’
He looked into Quark’s eyes, and that was a terrible mistake that he apparently hadn’t learned from already. Once his facsimile of eyes met Quark’s real ones, he lost all ability to speak once again. Even his groan made no sound. Great. Wonderful. Fantastic. Why now?!
‘I… take it Doctor Bashir couldn’t help you,’ Quark said. ‘Is this another disease that we can only cure if you go to the Great Link or whatever? Because the last time that happened, it didn’t end well. For anyone but my profits, which appreciated having another customer.’
Perhaps Odo wasn’t going to have the opportunity to confess his feelings to Quark. At the rate this conversation was going, Odo was going to strangle him long before then. And now his ‘skin’ was developing a red tint again. Even better!
Julian walked into the bar with great pace. ‘Don’t worry, Quark. I’ve ruled out anything that could actually be dangerous. You see, Odo-’
Odo gave him a glare that shut him right up. A glare that said ‘I will be the one to tell him, not you’, and Julian respected that. He just wondered how Odo planned to tell him without the ability to speak. Which is exactly what Odo was wondering too.
‘Sooo… he isn’t dying?’ Quark asked. ‘Good to know. Do you know what is wrong with him?’
‘Actually,’ Julian said. ‘He told me he wants to tell you himself.’
‘And how does he plan on doing that when he can’t even speak?’
‘I’m sure he’ll find a way.’
There were a few too many people watching; heck, even Quark alone would feel like one person too many. But Odo needed these damn symptoms to stop, and… and part of him wanted this. Whether he understood that or not. If only this crush didn’t kill his ability to speak.
Well, there was one way to get his message across. Something that Quark would easily understand without any words.
‘If you don’t explain this to me,’ Quark said. ‘I can kick you out for loitering. At least accuse me of something while you’re here.’
With no other choice and nothing to lose, Odo grabbed onto Quark as tight as he could, pulled him so close that their noses were almost touching…
‘Uh, O-Odo?’ Quark said. ‘W-Whatever you’re about to do, I-I swear I-‘
… and planted a big, long, passionate kiss directly on Quark’s lips. Much to his total and utter shock. Jadzia had been taking a sip at the time, and now her drink had been spat out everywhere. Was the kiss awkward, and obviously done by someone with little experience? Oh, absolutely. But Odo didn’t care. And neither did Quark, who quickly got over his shock and reciprocated.
‘Wow. Okay,’ Julian said. ‘That is… not how I thought that was going to happen.’
‘You’re telling… ack… me!’ Jadzia said, in between her coughing.
‘Why are you surprised?’ Kira asked. ‘You’ve been saying that they’re secretly in love for years now!’
‘I know. I just… didn’t expect Odo to make the first move!’
Odo broke up the kiss almost straight away. Partially out of realising he was probably doing it wrong, and partially out of his common sense kicking in again. It only made his ‘symptoms’ worse, and yet… he kind of liked it.
Quark looked the most shocked he ever had, and suddenly Odo’s mind was flooded with hundreds of horrible thoughts. Why the hell did he do this? Why did he think this was a good idea? How long would it take until Quark let him live this down? What if he never did? If he just melted into a puddle right then and there, it would be less embarrassing than…
Oh. Oh. Quark was grinning. And not in an ‘about to laugh at you’ sort of way. The same grin he had when someone offered him favours. He gently caressed his lobes, something that would normally make Odo feel uncomfortable but now made him feel strangely accomplished.
‘I-I hope that… that gets my message across,’ Odo managed to croak out.
‘Oh, did it…!’ Quark said. ‘It was just about as sloppy as I was expecting, but the passion. Oh, the passion! If I knew you even could kiss like that, I would’ve kissed you years ago!’
‘… What?’
Odo used every single mental detector he had in order to figure out if this was a joke or not. And yet, after years of trying to understand social jokes, he fell flat. The logic said ‘of course it was a joke’, but that tone…
‘And here I was,’ Quark continued. ‘Thinking that all those years of steamy fighting and aggressive flirting was all for nothing!’
‘… What?’
Quark groaned. ‘I thought you were an investigator! I know you were slow when it came to these things, but this is ridiculous.’
‘… What?!’
Jadzia went to point something out, only to start choking on her drink again. After pounding on her chest a few times, she was finally able to talk.
‘You really didn’t see it?’ She asked. ‘We’ve been joking about this for years!’
‘And I swear,’ Quark said. ‘If you say the word ‘what’ one more time, I’m kicking you out of the bar.’
‘So… so you…’ Odo croaked, trying his hardest to work with his own failing speech. ‘For years… wanted to… with me?’
‘YES!’ Quark shouted, throwing his head back. ‘I just… didn’t say anything outright in case you didn’t feel the same way. I mean, you flirted with me everyday, but I knew that if I asked you out, and I was wrong, you’d be using that against me for years! The risks did not out-value the gains.’ He grinned. ‘But that kiss… what was I worried about? You can’t fake passion that strong!’
Odo backed up a little bit more, unable to really escape thanks to his knees still being unstable. It took a lot of time for all of this to really sink in. After a thorough self-debate with all of his options, he came to a single conclusion.
‘Want to… do something?’ He asked. ‘Start… relationship?’
‘If it’ll get you talking right again,’ Quark started.
He interrupted himself just to give Odo a kiss of his own. It wasn’t quite as passionate, but certainly made up for it by simply being more skilled. Instead of… whatever it was that Odo attempted. It wasn’t too long either, which gave Odo the strange feeling of yearning.
‘Then we’ve started right now.’
Slowly, but surely, Odo’s weird symptoms subsided. His ‘skin’ returned to its normal colours, his knees strengthened, and that weird fluttering in his ‘stomach’ finally relaxed and stopped making him feel… well, a solid would’ve described it as ‘nauseous’. Okay, so there was still a little flutter, but now it felt kind of nice. It felt invigorating, like the goop in his body was moving on its own in utter bliss and joy.
He just couldn’t believe he was associating the words ‘bliss and joy’ with Quark.
‘So, uh, how does this work?’ Odo asked, thankful he could (mostly) talk away. ‘I admit that I’m a bit… inexperienced when it comes to relationships. But, uh… is this going to be long-term or short-term?’
‘Why, Odo!’ Quark said, a little too happily. ‘You’re already trying to figure out the terms for our marriage contract? I didn’t expect you to move things along so quickly!’
‘NO! … N-No. Let’s just… take this slowly.’
‘Alright. Fine. I’d be alright with either, but I’d prefer something a little more long term.’
‘So would I. … And on the topic of sorting out our terms, I’m not going any easier on you when it comes to the law. That won’t change, even if we end up raising kids together.’
Quark groaned. ‘Yes, alright. … Wait, kids?!’
THE END