Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“I think it would be best if you got out of the city. Away from the crowds and the noise. And the reminders.”

Castiel sighed as he glanced to the corner where Claire was silently playing with her toys, the specialist’s words coming back to him as the noise from the city below encroached on their solitude. It had been ten months since Bart died. Ten months since Castiel’s world had tilted on its axis. Ten months since the scariest day of his life.

Ten months since he’d heard his little girl speak. 

“Claire,” he called softly, smiling when her blue eyes met his. “Would you like to go on a trip?”

Claire’s eyes widened as she nodded. Scrambling to her feet, she rushed over to the table, flinging herself into Castiel’s lap. Where are we going, Papa? she signed.

“I don’t know yet. Where would you like to go?”

Claire’s face scrunched up as she thought. A pony farm!  

“A pony farm?” Castiel confirmed, cursing the day he’d introduced Claire to that My Little Pony show. “You know ponies don’t really fly, right?”

Claire huffed and rolled her eyes. I know, Papa, but I wanna see real ponies! And other animals! Like doggies! And…C-H-I-K-I-N-S she finger spelled. 

Castiel smiled at his daughter, pleased to see her ASL lessons were working, but more happy to see the bright smile on her face. They’d been few and far between the last ten months. “Chickens?” he asked.

Claire nodded and Castiel grabbed a piece of paper and wrote down the correct spelling. “This is how you spell it,” he showed her. “With another “C” and an “E.” He pointed out the letters, watching as Claire spelled along with her fingers. 

How do you sign it?

“I don’t know. Let’s Google it, shall we?” Claire nodded, so Castiel grabbed his laptop, quickly entering his query. “Look, Claire, it’s the same sign as bird. You already know this one.”

Claire smiled as she repeated the gesture. Daddy, I wanna see chickens.

“OK, Claire-bear. I can’t promise everything, but I’ll see what I can do, OK?

Claire nodded and squirmed off his lap, running back to her toys. Castiel turned back to his laptop and reopened Google. Kid friendly vacation ranch he typed in, groaning at the number of results. As he began clicking through the results, he frowned, noticing that they all seemed to be working dude ranch type places, with a minimum age of 12. He wasn’t quite ready to throw his only daughter on the back of a horse to chase cattle, even if she had been old enough. But Claire was only six, and all she really wanted was to be able to pet some horses and maybe collect some chicken eggs. 

Castiel chewed his lip as he clicked back to the endless Google results page, clicking on link after link and getting more and more frustrated. He was about to call it a day when a link caught his eye. Winchester Family Farm - Long and Short Term Vacation Rentals.

Curious, he clicked the link and was greeted with a picture of a cowboy at sunset, face hidden in shadow, as he watched over a herd of cattle. Scrolling down, Castiel read

Welcome to Winchester Family Farm!

We are a family run cattle farm offering long and short term vacation rentals. Want to learn about life on a cattle ranch? Sign up for one of our Dude Ranch Experiences! Just need to get away for a little while? Or a long while? Book one of our family friendly cabins and stay as long as you like! 

While we do have a minimum age of 12 for our Dude Ranch Experience, there is no minimum or maximum age for our cabin rentals! Vacationers renting one of our homey cabins will still have access to seeing how ranch life works and be able to interact with our animals (with appropriate supervision). So bring the whole family!

For more information, please fill out the contact form below! No phone calls please!

Castiel clicked through the pictures of the farm that were posted, checking out the cabins that were available and the animals on the farm. He smiled at a picture of a pretty brunette holding a baby chick, wondering if Claire would be allowed to hold one as well. His fingers hovered over the keyboard as he considered whether or not to fill out the form. Can’t hurt to ask for more information, he thought, quickly typing in his info and asking what activities there were for a six year old, both at the ranch and in the area, along with a few other questions.

A few hours later, just after tucking Claire in for the night, Castiel settled down to try and get some writing done. He was ahead of schedule with his latest novel, much to his agent’s pleasure, but he figured it couldn’t hurt to get as much written as possible while he could. His muse was a fickle creature, often abandoning him for weeks at a time before suddenly reappearing and throwing ideas and plot lines at him like a whirlwind. He had just finished a chapter when his email notification chimed. He saved the document he was working on and opened up his email, immediately noticing, and clicking on, the new email from Winchester Family Farms. 

Hi Castiel!

Thank you so much for your inquiry! I’m happy to answer your questions!

We have had guests stay from as little as one night to as long as a couple months, so whatever works best for you will work for us!

The long-stay cabins come complete with a kitchen for making your own meals, however, we do offer weekly Sunday dinners at the main house with our family. It’s absolutely optional whether you want to join us, but we like getting to know our guests (and my brother-in-law is an amazing cook!) But for the most part, you’d be left to buy and cook for yourself. There is also a laundry cabin that is shared between the guest cabins that is free to use.

As for activities for your little one, it totally depends on her personality! We’ve had some kids that like to pet a couple animals and then go play by themselves and others who want to learn everything, like how to feed and care for the animals. It’s up to you and your daughter, but if she wants to help collect eggs or brush the horses and you’re okay with that, that’s fine by us too! We also have a small playground on the property, hiking/riding trails, and a lake for swimming. It’s the end of season, so there won’t be any cattle drives she could watch, but we could arrange for her to meet some of the cows if she’s interested :) In town, we have an aquatic center and library and we also have a farmer’s market every weekend. 

You mentioned your daughter is currently homeschooled, so just thought I’d throw out there that I’m a certified primary school teacher. I stick to supply teaching these days, but I’m more than willing to help you with lesson plans and ideas if you’d like! 

We do have high speed internet that is pretty reliable - it generally only goes out during storms. We don’t charge extra for our guests to use the wi-fi :) 

Hope this information helps!

Take care,

Eileen Leahy-Winchester

Castiel leaned back in his chair, considering. His main concern had been keeping Claire occupied and being able to continue her ASL lessons. He already knew her teacher offered online lessons and it sounded like between the ranch and the local town there would be enough to keep Claire from being bored. Being a writer, Castiel could theoretically work from anywhere, and being ahead of schedule gave him a bit of leeway. 

Suddenly realizing he didn’t even know where the ranch was located, Castiel clicked back to the ranch website. Hartford, Kansas , he read, before opening Google Maps. It was a twenty hour drive from New York to Hartford. Castiel chewed his bottom lip as he thought. They could break up the drive into short sections, stopping along the way to see the sights. Claire had never left New York, Castiel having no contact with his family except his cousin, Gabriel, and Bart’s family having all been in the city. It would be a big adventure for Claire. Hopefully something that would help her heal. 

Before second thoughts and doubts could stop him, Castiel clicked back to the ranch’s page and filled out the booking form. He only hesitated a moment before clicking the submit button, but once he did, he was surprised with how calm he felt. Packing up and leaving the city for three months with a six year old seemed like something that should induce panic, but Castiel felt nothing but a serene sense of hope. 

He didn’t know what the next few months would bring, but he would cling to that hope like a moth to a flame.

It was quiet as Dean walked down the stairs towards the kitchen. It usually was, in the mornings, but there was usually the sounds of the daily hustle and bustle of a home - cupboards opening, bacon frying, soft murmurs as Sam and Eileen chatted over coffee. This morning, the quiet was deafening, and Dean had the sinking feeling that whatever he was about to walk in on, he wasn’t going to like. 

He paused in the entryway of the kitchen, eyeing his brother and sister-in-law who were seated at the table in the midst of a furious back and forth of sign language. From this angle, Dean couldn’t make out what they were signing but the fact that they were only signing and not speaking could only mean one thing: they didn’t want Dean to overhear. 

Dean rolled his eyes and stepped into the kitchen, making sure Eileen had spotted him before signing and speaking, “Morning, kids.” He poured himself some coffee from the pot and made his way to the table, eyeing both of them warily. 

“Good morning, Dean,” Eileen returned, a bright smile on her face. “Sleep well?”

Dean narrowed his eyes at her. Something was definitely up. Eileen was a little too bright and friendly. “Yup,” he responded. “You?”

“Great!”

“Great,” Dean repeated, before turning to Sam. “And you?”

“Uh, yeah, great.”

“Great,” Dean repeated again, flicking his eyes between the two of them. “Whatcha talking about?”

“Plans for the day,” said Sam.

“What to make for dinner,” said Eileen. 

“Right.” Dean leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms over his chest. “Now let’s try the truth, hmm?”

Sam let out a breath and deflated, which was actually quite an amusing thing to watch - his sasquatch of a brother sank down into his chair and shrank in on himself, somehow suddenly both a 25 year old man and a 5 year old boy. “You’re not gonna like it,” he muttered.

“Yeah, I figured that out already, Sam, thanks. Might as well get it over with, eh?”

Sam and Eileen exchanged a look, a silent argument passing between them, before Eileen squared her shoulders and faced Dean. “I got a booking this morning.”

Dean shrugged. “Cattle drives are over for the year, so I assume it’s just a booking for one of the long stay cabins?” Eileen nodded. “OK, and? No skin off my back if someone wants to sit around and do nothing. As long as they stay out of my way.” 

That had been the deal when Dean agreed to the whole Dude Ranch idea. Eileen would handle bookings and the day-to-day dealings with the guests. Sam and Dean would lead the cattle drives for those interested in participating. Otherwise guests were left to their own devices, with access to the entire ranch. As long as they stayed out of Dean’s way.

“It’s for a father and his six year old daughter,” Eileen started. “For three months. They’ll be here next week.”

OK, that was longer than Dean was expecting, to be honest. But still. “Well, we have rules, right? Kids that young can’t be unsupervised around the horses and cattle.” He looked between them again. “I’m still not getting the part I’m not supposed to like.”

Sam huffed out a disbelieving laugh. “Dean, you hate kids.”

Dean blinked. “Uhh, no, I don’t.”

“Uhh, yeah, you do.”

“What the hell are you talking about? I love kids.” Dean was honestly confused. He really did like kids. Hell, he still went to Ben’s ball games and took him out for pizza occasionally, and he and Lisa had broken up years ago. 

“Dean, I’ve heard you complain about kids when families come to stay,” Sam explained. “You can’t wait for them to get out of here. And the mood you’re in while they are here?” He shook his head. “You’re miserable.”

Dean laughed outright at that. “No, Sam, you’re misunderstanding. I don’t hate kids. I hate little brats who think they can get away with everything because their parents are rich assholes who don’t actually parent them. Kids who get in the way because they’ve never heard the word ‘no’ in their life. Normal kids, like Ben? They’re great.”

Sam sighed. “Well, there’s no way to know what this kid will be like,” he pointed out. 

Eileen spoke up again then. “I think she might have special needs.”

Dean frowned at that. “What makes you say that?”

“In his email, her dad was asking about internet access. Said he needed to make sure they could video conference her specialist.”

Dean chewed his bottom lip as he considered that. Special needs could be anything from having ADHD to being wheelchair bound. Though, he doubted a father would bring a wheelchair bound kid to a ranch that was bound to be inaccessible. And if anyone knew about having special needs, it was him and Eileen. “Well, it can’t be too bad if he’s willing to bring her out to the middle of nowhere for three months, right?” he said, mostly to himself, but Eileen nodded. “Great, so again, as long as they don’t get in the way, everything will be fine.”

“You’re taking this much better than I thought you would,” Sam stated.

“Yeah, well, you’re an idiot who thought I hated kids,” Dean snarked. 

Sam rolled his eyes and got up to get more coffee. Dean turned to Eileen. Your husband is dumb.

Eileen grinned. I know.

Dean wouldn’t admit it, but as the week passed, he grew more and more agitated by the thought of having a six year old around for three months. He really did like kids, but he couldn’t help but remember the brats he’d had to put up with in the past, and most of those had only been around for a week or two. And fuck, what if she did have special needs and couldn’t understand why she couldn’t do certain things or why she was in the way? Dean dreaded the thought of hating a little kid for something they couldn’t even control. 

So, to allay his fears, he threw himself into work. The cattle had already been moved to their winter pasture in the valley, but that didn’t mean work stopped. There were still horses to tend to, fences to mend, feed to buy, and worst of all, bookkeeping. If Dean had his way, there would be no Dude Ranch, no guest cabins, just him, his family and the cattle. But the books didn’t lie and Dean knew the guest bookings were often the only thing keeping them afloat. So Dean sucked it up, plastered a smile on his face, and dealt with city slickers and their annoying spawn.

The morning the family - the Novaks , Dean had learned - was set to arrive, Dean saddled up Chevy and rode towards the valley, ostensibly to check on the cows, but really to keep watch on the road. It was peaceful out here where the only sounds were the chirping of birds and the hum of the cattle as they moved about. Dean loved September, the weather still warm enough he didn’t have to worry about wearing layers and layers of clothing, but a far cry from the blasting heat of high summer. He didn’t have to worry about heat stroke in the animals, or how hard he could run Chevy. He could just enjoy being out in nature, the leaves starting to change color, racing Chevy through the meadow, either after a wayward cow or just because he could. 

A cloud of dust caught his eye and he peered out towards the road, spotting what looked to be some kind of SUV heading towards the ranch. “Time to face the music, Chev,” he muttered to his long-suffering horse. “Come on, let’s race them back!”

He turned Chevy back towards the meadow and squeezed his legs tight. Chevy burst into a gallop, his hooves thundering over the grass, neck stretched out. Dean laughed in delight, relishing the wind on his face, one hand on the reins, the other holding tight to his Stetson. Chevy tore over the ground, throwing up clumps of dirt in his wake, snorting his pleasure. As they got closer to the barn, Dean slowed him to a gentle lope, then to a trot. Approaching the gate to the parking area by the barn, Dean saw the SUV pulling to a stop. “Looks like a tie, Chev. We’ll get ‘em next time,” he murmured, patting Chevy’s neck before reaching down to open the gate and maneuvering Chevy through. He closed the gate behind them and walked Chevy over to the car just as the man was helping a little girl out of a booster seat. “Hey there,” he greeted them. “You must be the Novaks.”

The man turned, shifting the girl to his hip so they were both facing Dean. And, holy shit. Dean had never seen a more attractive man in his life. The cut of his jaw, the wildness of his hair, the five-o’clock shadow covering his cheeks even though it was barely past noon. And, his eyes. If Dean were a poet, he could write sonnets about those eyes. Sonnets, really? Dean groaned inwardly, feeling his cheeks start to flush. He jumped down off Chevy, hoping the man hadn’t noticed him staring, and pulled off one of his gloves, sticking his hand out. “Dean Winchester. Welcome.”

The little girl started squirming and the man put her down before reaching out to take Dean’s hand. “Castiel Novak. And this is my daughter Claire,” he responded, placing a gentle hand on her head. 

Dean glanced down at the kid. Her blonde hair stuck out from underneath the hood of her brown knitted sweater and her wide blue eyes stared up at Chevy in awe. Little bear ears were attached to the hood and bear claw mittens hung from strings from each sleeve. Dean smiled and crouched down to eye level, sticking out his hand. “Hi, Claire, it’s nice to meet you.”

Claire pulled her gaze away from Chevy, glancing first at Dean and then up at her father. He nodded in encouragement and she turned back to Dean, taking his hand and shaking it with all the solemnity of a six year old, before pulling her hand away. 

It’s nice to meet you, too.  

Oh.  

“She said it’s nice to meet you, too,” Castiel said. Dean glanced up and saw his entire being had tensed, as though waiting for some kind of judgement. 

Dean just smiled and turned back to Claire, who was watching him anxiously. He dropped Chevy’s rein and pulled off his other glove, making sure he had Claire’s attention. I like your sweater, Little Bear.

The change in Claire was instantaneous. One second she was anxiously awaiting judgement and the next her eyes had widened in surprise and she was bouncing on the balls of her feet, her smile bright enough to rival the sun. You know signs?!!

Dean chuckled. He could practically hear the exclamation marks. “I sure do! My name sign is 'Dean’ ,” he said, showing her his name sign - the sign for green but with a shaking “d” instead of a “g.”  What’s yours?

Claire smiled and brought her hands up to cross over her chest, her left hand forming a claw that she scratched at her shoulder with, and the right forming the letter “c” - a modified version of the sign for bear . Dean chuckled. “You really are a little bear, huh?” He tugged playfully on one of the ears on her hood.

Claire nodded happily. Papa made me my sweater, she signed proudly, beaming up at her dad.

“And what about Papa?” Dean asked, standing back up and finally turning to Castiel again. “Does he have a name sign?”

Castiel’s smile was as bright as Claire’s. Gone was the tenseness in his shoulders and jaw. He held up his right hand forming a “c” by his shoulder that morphed into the sign for wing . “I’m named after an angel,” he shrugged. “Claire’s ASL teacher thought it was funny.”

Dean laughed. “Hey, man, it’s better than modifying the sign for green .” He glanced down as he felt a tug on his shirt. “Yes, Little Bear?”

Can I P-E-T your horsie? 

“Yeah, you can pet him,” he replied. “Look, ‘pet’ ” he showed her the sign for pet , smiling as she repeated the gesture and then her request using the sign. “This here is Chevy,” he said, showing her Chevy’s name sign and picking up his dropped reins. Claire took a few tentative steps towards the horse, clearly nervous, but determined. “He likes when you stroke his nose,” Dean told her, demonstrating.

Claire slowly reached her little hand out and stroked his muzzle, her eyes widening. He’s soft!  Suddenly, her eyes narrowed again, peering behind Dean. Who’s that? 

Dean could tell she was getting anxious again, and quickly turned to glance over his shoulder to confirm who it was before turning back to Claire. “That’s Eileen,” Dean told her, showing her Eileen’s name sign. “Don’t worry, she’s really nice.”

Claire didn’t look convinced, backing away to hover near Castiel, who for his part, at least, looked much less anxious to meet Eileen than he had Dean.

“Hey, Dean, who are your friends?” Eileen asked when she’d made it over to them.

“This is Castiel Novak and his daughter, Claire,” Dean signed and spoke, biting down a smile as Claire peered up curiously at Eileen. “Guys, this is Eileen, my sister-in-law.”

It’s nice to meet you, Eileen Castiel signed, only slightly fumbling over her name sign, the sign for beautiful , ending with the sign for “e”. He turned to Claire. “Come say hi, sweetheart.”

It’s nice to meet you, Eileen Claire repeated, not fumbling at all. She bit her lip for a minute. Why do you talk like that?

“Claire!” Castiel admonished softly, his cheeks turning pink. “Don’t be rude.”

Dean snorted, remembering how he’d asked Eileen the same thing when they’d met as kids and absolutely sure she was about to mention it.

True to form, Eileen just laughed. “It’s ok! Dean asked me the same thing when we met!” 

Castiel looked at Dean with raised eyebrows. “Hey, man, I wasn’t much older than Claire at the time. It’s a perfectly natural question for a kid!”

Eileen nodded. “It really is fine.” She crouched down to meet Claire’s eyes. “I talk like this because I’m deaf. Do you know what that means?” Claire shook her head. “It means I can’t hear.”

Claire’s eyes widened. You can’t hear??   Eileen shook her head. I can’t talk, Claire announced, her little face falling in sadness.

Castiel crouched down and pulled Claire into a hug. “You can still talk, Claire-bear. You just use your hands. The same way Eileen uses sign language to hear.”

It’s not the same though, is it, Papa? 

Castiel shook his head. “No, sweetheart, it’s not the same. But that doesn’t mean I love you any less.”

“Yeah, Little Bear,” Dean chimed in. “And using sign language is awesome! It’s like a secret language not many people know! Like we’re in a special club or something!”

That seemed to cheer Claire up and she turned back to Eileen. What’s the sign for that? For you not hearing?

“Deaf?” Eileen confirmed. Claire nodded and Eileen showed her the sign. “Come on. We should let Dean put Chevy away and get you guys settled in.” 

“You guys coming for dinner tonight?” Dean asked. “It’s Sunday. Family dinner night.”

“Oh, we wouldn’t want to impose,” Castiel started.

“You wouldn’t be,” Eileen assured him. “Dean always makes enough to feed a small army, and you and Claire are the only guests right now, so there will be plenty.”

Dean looked down as Claire tugged his shirt. Can you make burgers?

Dean beamed. “Sure can! I make the best burgers, just you wait.”

“I guess we’re coming for dinner,” Castiel laughed.

And unlike every other time guests had come for dinner, Dean was looking forward to it.

Chapter Text

Eileen showed Castiel and Claire to their accommodations, a lovely little log cabin with a porch that spanned the front, surrounded by beds of flowers. Inside was welcoming, despite the dark wooden walls, with large windows letting in an abundance of sunlight through sheer curtains. The furniture was old, but in a well-loved, comfortable way, not a decaying kind of way. The master bedroom had a large closet, while the smaller bedroom, what would be Claire’s room, had a sturdy chest of drawers. There was more than enough room for Claire to play, both inside and outside. Castiel loved it immediately.

“The laundry room is the cabin that’s two doors down,” Eileen told him. “It’s open 24-7 and free to use. Here’s a list of our phone numbers,” she handed him a sheet of paper. “Obviously, you’ll have to text me, but if you can’t get a hold of me, you can call Sam, my husband. And if you can’t get a hold of him , you can call Dean.” 

“Will we meet Sam at dinner?” Castiel asked, not wanting to have to call someone he hadn’t met yet.

Eileen nodded. “Yeah, he should be home from work soon. He’s a vet. The clinic is in town but he takes care of most of the farm calls, so who knows where he is at any given time.”

“I look forward to meeting him,” Castiel smiled. “And thank you, for all your help. I’m sorry I don’t know more sign language.” Thank you. 

You’re welcome. “And don’t worry about it. Most people don’t know any sign language. It’s why I learned to read lips.” With that, she bid them both goodbye.

Castiel wandered into the smaller bedroom to find Claire haphazardly stuffing her clothes into the drawers. “Would you like some help?”

Claire turned towards him. No, I can do it, Papa.

Castiel huffed and shook his head. “Ok, sweetheart. I’m going to go put my clothes away.” 

Claire nodded and Castiel went across the hall to his own room to begin unpacking his clothes. The day had gone much better than he’d anticipated. The past week hadn’t been easy. Castiel had hoped that getting Claire out of the city would calm her anxiety somewhat, but every time they’d stopped at a tourist site, she’d regressed a little at the crowds and noise. Castiel had finally given up on major sites and started looking for more out of the way places they could stop and explore - parks and hiking trails that were devoid of people. He’d been worried that meeting new people today would make Claire regress again, but he’d been more than pleasantly surprised. After the initial rush of protective anxiousness when Claire had first signed in front of Dean, everything had gone smoothly. Which was all due to Dean, of course. He had never thought the cowboy would know sign language. It made sense, of course, having and living with a deaf sister-in-law. But still, the surprise had been a welcome one.

And Claire’s reaction was everything Castiel had hoped it would be. She’d never said so, whether because she didn’t want to or simply didn’t know the signs to express herself, but Castiel knew part of her anxiousness was due to how people treated her when they found out she didn’t speak. There’d been a range of reactions they’d both encountered, from pity to scorn, and he knew Claire felt the rejection every time.

But Dean - Dean had barely blinked when she’d started signing. Hadn’t made a big deal out of it at all. Hadn’t even asked why she signed when she obviously could hear. He just…went with it. Signing back like it wasn’t a big deal. And while Castiel had tried to impress upon Claire that signing and not speaking wasn’t a big deal, Dean’s reaction (or non-reaction as it were) was a big deal. He’d made her feel safe. Welcome. Normal . Castiel wondered if Dean had even realized what an impact he’d made.

Castiel also wondered if Dean had a significant other, because really? One did not meet Dean Winchester and not notice how beautiful he was.

Castiel shook off that thought as he finished putting away his clothes. He had just hung up the last shirt when Claire knocked on the doorframe. “Hi, Claire-bear. All done with your clothes?”

Claire nodded. Can we play outside?

“Let’s have some lunch first. Aren’t you hungry?”

Claire nodded again. And then we can play?

“Of course, sweetheart.” 

He set about making some sandwiches from the groceries they’d bought in town along with some potato chips and juice. After they’d eaten and cleaned up, he turned to Claire. “Do you want to take some toys outside, or do you want to look around?”

Claire thought about it for a second. Can we go pet Chevy?

“I’m not sure, Claire. Dean might be too busy to help us. But we can go look around and see if we see any other animals? And Eileen told me there’s a little playground behind the barn we could go check out?”

Claire smiled up at him. OK!

She turned and ran towards the front door, Castiel following close behind. Stepping out onto the front porch, he took a deep breath. God, the air was so fresh here. And it was quiet. No sirens, no car horns, no drunken yelling. Sure, there was noise - birds and insects and the occasional horse nicker - but it all seemed so much more natural. It was soothing. And speaking of birds - 

“Claire, look! I found the chickens!” Claire looked where he was pointing, climbing up on the porch railing to see better. It took her a moment, but her face lit up when she saw the chicken enclosure.

Can we go see them, Papa?

“Yes, but we shouldn’t try to pet them unless Eileen or Dean say we can, ok? Just looking for now. And we have to walk over, not run - we don’t want to scare them.” Claire nodded and jumped down from the railing, grabbing his hand and tugging him towards the enclosure. She dropped to her knees once she was at the fence, her eyes roaming over the birds as they pecked at the ground. 

Papa, there’s so many I can’t even count them! Her jaw dropped as a hen came into view from around the side of the chicken coop, four little chicks following behind. Papa! Look! Baby chickens!

“They sure are cute,” Castiel responded, pulling out his phone and snapping some pictures of Claire’s excitement and the chicks’ adorableness. They stayed watching the chickens for a while before heading out to look for the playground. It was easy to find, right behind the barn and in front of a pasture full of horses. 

Claire climbed up the ladder of the slide before turning and looking over the pasture, her hand over her eyes to shade them from the sun, looking like an explorer surveying her land. Suddenly she pointed. There he is!

Castiel looked where she was pointing, but all he could see was the herd of horses. “Who?”

Claire rolled her eyes. Chevy!

“How do you know it’s him?” Castiel looked again, but there were a couple of brown horses that looked pretty much the same to him. 

Claire shrugged. I just know. He’s prettier than the other horses and he looks different.

Castiel laughed. “If you say so, sweetheart.” Claire scowled at him before giving up on trying to convince him, sliding down the slide and running over to the swings. They spent almost an hour at the playground before wandering back towards the cabin. They were about halfway between the barn and their cabin when they heard something trotting up behind them, making them both turn.

“Meh-eh-eh.”

It was a goat. Almost as tall as Claire, mostly gray with patches of white, and horns that curved up and backwards. It stood blinking at them. “Meh-eh-eh,” it said again.

Castiel glanced down at Claire to gauge her reaction. She seemed to be caught somewhere between shock and excitement, her jaw dropped open but curved up in a smile at the same time. She looked up at him with big eyes. How do you sign G-O-T-E?

“G-O-A-T,” Castiel corrected gently, watching as she spelled it out. “I’m not sure. We’ll have to ask Dean or Eileen at dinner.”

“Meh-eh-eh,” the goat said, taking a step forward and bumping its head gently into Claire’s stomach, causing her to take a step back. Her smile widened further as her hands came up to stroke its cheeks. The goat’s eyes closed as it leaned into her touch. 

“I see you’ve met Cartman,” came Dean’s voice from behind them. Castiel turned to see him approaching. “Pain in the a - uh, butt, that one.” He smiled down at Claire. “He seems to like you, though, Little Bear.”

I like him, too!

“Claire wanted to know the sign for goat ,” Castiel said to Dean. 

Dean grinned. “This is the sign for ‘ goat ,’” he said, showing her. “And this is his name sign,” he continued.

Claire frowned. That’s just E and C.

Dean laughed. “Yeah, he’s named after Eric Cartman. From South Park . ‘Cause he’s a stubborn little shi - poop,” he corrected, blushing slightly. 

What’s that thing you said? Park something?

“ South Park ,” Dean replied, showing her the signs. “It’s a cartoon.”

Claire nodded and turned back to the goat, scratching behind his ears. Dean turned to Castiel. “I’m gonna go get started on those burgers. I’ll see you guys in a bit?”

“Once I can drag her away from Cartman, yes,” Castiel laughed. “Uhh, do we just leave him here?”

“Yeah, he pretty much has the run of the place. Wreaks havoc if we try and put him in the barn or a pen so we just let him wander. He might follow you or he might wander off. He just does his own thing.”

“Alright, well, if I can tear Claire away, we’ll see you soon.”

Dean left and Castiel watched as Claire fussed over the goat, who seemed to soak up the attention. He took a few pictures of them together before encouraging her to leave him, promising he’d be around during their stay. 

As they wandered back to the cabin, Castiel watched Claire. They hadn’t even been here half a day yet, and already she seemed calmer, happier. Settled. She’d taken to Dean and Eileen faster than she’d taken to any stranger, even before Bart had died. Not to mention the thrill of her meeting the different animals. He’d wondered, during the drive out, during the stress and anxiety of stopping along the way, if it had been the right decision, packing up and coming out here.

But seeing Claire now? He knew without a doubt it had been.

The doorbell rang just as Dean was finishing dinner. He quickly wiped his hands on a dish towel and hurried to the front door, swinging it open with a smile. “Hey guys! Come on in! Sam’s not home yet, but he should be here in a few minutes, so he said to start without him.” He stepped back to give Castiel and Claire room to enter and remove their shoes before leading them towards the kitchen. Halfway down the hall, Bones came bounding from the kitchen. “Hey, buddy! Are you excited for new friends?” Dean asked, scratching behind his ears. He turned to his guests. “This is Bones,” he said, showing Claire the dog’s name sign. “He’s an Australian Shepherd and the best cattle dog around.” 

Claire crept forward and held her hand out cautiously. Dean smiled at her gently. God, it was nice seeing a kid with proper manners around the animals. Most of the brats he’d encountered would’ve just run up to Bones and started bothering him. He watched as Bones sniffed Claire’s hand and sat down. Claire glanced at Dean. “You can pet him. He’s friendly,” he told her. 

Claire reached out and stroked his head, smiling softly at Bones. He’s soft like Chevy!

Dean grinned and crouched down to her level. “He sure is! Now, Claire, I’m gonna tell you something really important, OK?” Claire looked at him with big eyes and nodded. “Sam might tell you not to feed Bones any of your dinner cause it’s not good for him, OK? So here’s what we’re gonna do. When Sam is talking to me, you sneak Bones some food. And when Sam is talking to you, I’ll sneak him some food, OK?”

Claire grinned back and nodded. OK!

“Atta girl!” 

Castiel huffed a soft laugh. “Are you being a bad influence on my daughter, Mr. Winchester?”

“Wouldn’t dream of it, Mr. Novak,” Dean winked at him. “Come on, dinner’s getting cold.” He led them through to the kitchen where Eileen was just finishing setting the table. “Now, we’ve got all the fixings - tomatoes, lettuce, onion -” he noticed Claire wrinkle her nose at that. “OK, no onion for Little Bear,” he amended, ruffling her hair. “What about cheese?”

Yes, please!

“Alright, everything but onions for Little Bear. What about you, Cas?” His eyes widened as he realized what he’d called his guest. “Uhh, all the fixings and a nickname ok?” 

Castiel smiled. “Sounds perfect. Thank you Dean.”

“You got it. Have a seat guys,” he said, pulling out a raised chair from the table that would let Claire reach everything. “Here you go, Little Bear.” He watched as she climbed up on the chair, itching to help but wanting her to feel independent. When she was settled he pushed the chair back closer to the table as Cas (yeah, he was already officially Cas now in Dean’s mind) settled next to her. 

Dean turned back to the counter and started grabbing burgers and ingredients, fixing them up for his guests before dumping homemade fries on the plate. He dropped the plates in front of them before turning and fixing up his, Eileen’s and Sam’s plates and settling across from Claire with Eileen next to him. Sam would sit at the head of the table, at the far end away from Dean and Claire, perfect for sneaking treats to Bones. 

“Alright, well, we ain’t religious in this family, but if you guys want to say Grace or something, go ahead,” he said, looking over to Cas.

Cas snorted. “No, we aren’t religious either. Had too much of that growing up to last a lifetime.”

Dean stared at him for a moment. There was definitely a story there, he could tell, but having just met the two, it wasn’t the right time to ask. “Alright, well then, dig in!”

He’d just taken a bite of his burger when he heard the front door open. Claire’s eyes shot upwards to the blinking red light on the ceiling.

What’s that?

Eileen answered, thankfully, since Dean was still chewing. “That’s how I know someone came into the house.”

Because you’re deaf, Claire stated matter-of-factly. Dean couldn’t help but notice how she used the new sign perfectly with no hesitation. She was a smart little cookie.

Eileen smiled across the table at her. “That’s right. I can’t hear the doorbell or the door open, so Dean put these lights in all the rooms so I’ll know when someone is here.”

Claire turned to Dean. You did it? Dean nodded. You must be really smart!

Dean could feel his cheeks heating, because of course, Dean Winchester couldn’t accept a compliment, even when it came from a six year old. “I don’t know, Little Bear, I think you’re pretty smart, too.”

Claire’s eyebrows pulled together. How come?

“You’re really good at picking up new signs. How many new ones did you learn today?”

Claire thought for a moment before starting to list the words. Dean. Pet. Chevy. Eileen. Deaf. Goat. Cartman. South Park. Bones. 

“You taught her South Park and not Sam?” came a voice from the entryway. Dean turned to see his brother with a bemused smile on his face. “Hi guys, you must be the Novaks. I’m ‘ Sam ’,” he said, showing Claire his name sign, holding his right hand in the sign for “ s ” by his temple before opening his hand while he dipped it down and up and then slightly away from his head. 

Dean winked at Claire. “Sam’s name sign is a modified version of the sign for ‘ moose ’,” he said, showing her the sign.

Cause he’s so big?

Dean snorted. “Exactly! See, I told you you were smart! That’s two more signs you just learned so I think we’re up to eleven in one day!” He turned to Sam. “Sam, this is Castiel and Claire,” he introduced, showing Sam their name signs. 

“Nice to meet you, Sam,” Cas said, shaking Sam’s hand. 

“Yeah, you too, man. You guys find the place ok?” he asked, sitting down and digging into his dinner. 

Castiel nodded. “We stopped in town for groceries and discovered Google Maps is kind of useless out here, so we bought a map. The girl behind us in line asked where we were headed and seemed very excited to help us find our way.” 

Dean groaned before he could continue. “Let me guess, red hair, super excitable, said her name is Charlie?” He noticed Claire watching him as Cas nodded. “‘ Charlie ’,” he spoke and signed, the letter “ c ” tapping on his nose twice, a modified version of nerd . “Watch out for her, she’s a troublemaker.”

Beside him, Eileen laughed. “That’s why she’s your best friend! You two caused all kinds of trouble growing up.” 

Dean rolled his eyes. “Yeah, well, some of us outgrew it!” 

“Judging from your pre-dinner instructions to Claire, I don’t think that was you, Dean,” Cas laughed.

“Pre-dinner instructions?” Sam asked, turning to glower at Dean. “Did you ask Claire to help you feed Bones table scraps?”

“I would never do any such thing! Right, Claire?”

Claire grinned at them all mischievously. Dean gave Bones a french fry!

Eileen and Cas laughed while Dean clutched at his chest dramatically. “You sold me out, Little Bear!”

Claire’s grin just got wider as Sam admonished Dean, and since his focus was on Dean, Claire was able to slip Bones a fry from her own plate. Dean caught Cas’ eye and saw that he’d seen what she’d done and was biting back a laugh. He winked at both of them. 

When Sam was finished telling him off (which did absolutely no good because as soon as Sam’s back was turned, Bones got more fries), Dean turned to Cas and Claire. “So what did you guys do all afternoon?”

“After we unpacked and had lunch we wandered around a bit. We found the chicken coop and the playground, and of course, met Cartman.”

Claire chimed in then. We saw baby chickens! They were so cute!

“Maybe tomorrow you can help me collect eggs, if you want,” offered Eileen.

Claire turned to Cas. Can I Papa?

“Of course, sweetheart.” 

Claire beamed and turned back to Dean. At the playground I saw Chevy in the field! But Papa didn’t know which one he was!

Dean glanced at Cas who shrugged. “You have several brown horses. They all look the same.”

Claire huffed. No, Papa! I told you! He looks different!

“Different how?” Dean asked, curious as to what she’d picked up on.

Claire shrugged. I don’t know all the signs.

“Just try, sweetheart,” Cas encouraged. “We’ll help you.”

Claire chewed her lip for a moment before starting. He’s…bigger…than the other horses. Not bigger like fat though. Bigger like Sam.

“Taller?” Eileen suggested and, when Claire nodded, showed her the sign.

Yeah, he’s taller than the other ones. But not a lot. And he has…lines? On his legs. 

She looked at Dean. “‘ Stripes ,’” he told her, showing her the sign. “They’re called stripes.”

Stripes. And the other horses had more…. She trailed off not knowing the sign.

“Can you spell it?” Cas asked. 

Claire shook her head, then brightened as she reached up to touch Cas’ arm. Like you have, Papa! Like this! She brought her arm up as though showing off her biceps.

“Muscles?” Cas asked, a smile in his eyes. They both turned to look across the table.

Dean was busy staring at Claire, amazed at how much she’d noticed in the five minutes she’d seen Chevy up close, so Eileen answered their unasked question, showing them the sign for muscles.

The other horses have more muscles by their back legs. Like near their bums.  So that’s how I knew, Claire concluded with a decisive nod.

“Wow,” said Sam and Eileen.

“Uhh,” said Cas.

“Holy shit,” said Dean.

That’s a bad word, signed Claire.

There was silence for a moment before Dean started laughing. He shook his head. Who was this kid? “Sorry about the bad word, Claire. But you are absolutely right about everything you just said about Chevy.”

Claire looked up at Cas. Told you!

Cas looked absolutely bewildered. “Most of the horses here are Quarter Horses,” Dean explained. “Stockier, more muscled, good ranch horses. Chevy is the only exception. He’s a Mustang. Most likely got some recent Thoroughbred blood in his genes. One of the neighbor’s Thoroughbred mares escaped about a decade back and has been running with one of the wild herds around here. We think Chevy is one of her foals or grand-foals. That’s why he’s not so…bulky, I guess you could say. More refined. Taller,” he nodded at Claire with a smile. “The stripes on his legs are a common feature of Mustangs, too. He was born in the wild but was abandoned by the herd for some reason, so we took him in.”

He’s my favourite.

Dean smiled softly at Claire across the table. “Yeah, he’s my favourite, too.” 

Cas pulled Claire into a side hug, kissing the top of her head. “I’m sorry I didn’t believe you, Claire-bear. You’re so smart, you know?”

Claire just rolled her eyes. I know, Papa. You tell me all the time.

Cas huffed a laugh. “Well, you keep proving how smart you are so I have to keep pointing it out.” 

Claire just smiled and rolled her eyes again, eating her last few fries before pushing her plate away. Can I play with Bones?

“Sure you can!” Sam told her. “How about you and your dad and Dean take him outside to play while Eileen and I clean up a bit?”

“We can help,” Cas started, but Sam waved him off, standing and collecting plates.

“Nah, it’s fine, we got it. Besides, Bones probably needs the exercise after all the french fries these two fed him.” He glared down at Claire but his smile gave away his amusement. Claire smiled shyly back.

“Well, thank you for having us,” Cas said to both Sam and Eileen before turning to Claire. “What do you say, sweetheart?”

Thank you, Sam! Thank you, Eileen! Thank you, Dean! The burgers were yummy!

“You’re welcome, Claire,” said Eileen. “Bones has some toys by the front door you can take out for him to play with.”

Claire nodded and jumped down from her chair, skipping towards the door, Bones and Cas following behind. Dean started to follow when he was stopped by Eileen.

You know why Charlie was excited to meet them, don’t you?

Dean rolled his eyes. Yeah, cause she wants to play matchmaker.

Is she wrong? I saw how you were looking at him all night. 

Dean shrugged. He’s pretty.

Eileen raised an eyebrow. Yeah, pretty fucking hot.  

Can’t argue with that. Doesn’t mean he swings that way.

I dunno, Dean. He seemed to be looking at you quite a bit, too.  

Dean blushed. You’ve been hanging around Charlie too much. Go help the sasquatch.

Eileen laughed and pulled him into a hug. I just want you to be happy, she said when she pulled away.

I know. I love you, too.  

He shooed her away and went to find their guests.

Castiel was leaning against the porch railing watching Claire play with Bones when he heard the front door open. He turned to find Dean stepping out. He turned back to watching Claire as Dean stepped up beside him. 

They were silent for a few moments, watching Claire throw toys in different directions for Bones to chase after. Cas stole glances at Dean, watching him watch his daughter with a soft smile. He sighed. “You must have a lot of questions.”

“Ain’t my business,” Dean replied softly, his eyes never leaving Claire. 

Castiel snorted. “That’s never stopped anyone from asking before.”

Dean turned then, leaning one hip against the railing so he was facing Cas. Cas watched as Dean seemed to study him for a minute, chewing his lip in thought. “Let me guess,” he finally said, “they ask, rudely, questions they got no right asking, and then judge you, and her, for the answer.”

Castiel dropped his gaze to the ground, nodding. Dean had summed up the last ten months of interactions with people perfectly. 

“And,” Dean continued, “you try to shield her from it. But she’s too smart and she picks up on it.” Castiel nodded again and Dean shook his head. “People are assholes.”

Castiel huffed a laugh. “Understatement.” Noticing movement, he looked back to the yard, seeing Sam and Eileen appear from around the corner of the house with a net and racquets of some kind. Claire ran up to them, signing excitedly, then watching as they set up the net and showed her how to hold the racquet. Badminton, Cas realized with a smile. He turned back to Dean. “Most people are assholes,” he agreed, “but you, all of you,” he nodded towards Sam and Eileen, “you’ve been so good with her. Thank you.”

Dean blushed, dropping his gaze. “Ain’t nothing to thank us for, Cas. She’s a good kid. Smart kid. Bet she knows another half dozen signs before they’re done playing.”

“No, Dean, really,” he reached out to touch Dean’s arm. Dean froze, flicking his eyes up to meet his own, pink cheeks darkening further before his eyes darted away again. “The past ten months, Claire has been…different. Anxious. Scared. Sad,” he added. “She’s barely been able to leave our apartment without crying. People have been cruel. Kids have teased her.” He looked back to where the badminton match was in full swing, smiling as Sam dramatically missed a shot which had Claire falling to the ground in silent giggles. “We’ve been here half a day and she’s already so much more like she used to be. I haven’t seen her this confident, this… happy, since before - ” he cut himself off and paused for a moment, then dipped his head down to find Dean’s eyes again. “Just, thank you.” He squeezed Dean’s arm gently before stepping back again. 

After a moment, Dean nodded and cleared his throat. “It’s, uhh, I mean, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, but, it’s traumatic mutism, isn’t it?”

Castiel blinked at him in shock. Most people only knew the term selective mutism and assumed that’s what Claire was experiencing. He nodded. “How did you know?”

Dean crossed his arms over his chest and blew out a breath. “I, umm, went through that. When I was a kid. S’why I learned to sign.”

“Oh,” Castiel breathed. “I’m sorry, I just assumed you learned because of Eileen. Guess I’m just another asshole making assumptions.”

Dean chuckled. “Nah, it makes sense to think that. Most people do. But, uh, I stopped talking when I was four. It was a while before anyone realized it was gonna be a long term thing so I didn’t start ASL lessons until I was six.”  He glanced over at Claire and shook his head. “Didn’t pick it up nearly as fast as her though.”

Castiel smiled. “Her ASL teacher thinks I should have her tested. She said she might have a photographic memory, or at least a better ability than most people to retain new information.”

Dean hummed thoughtfully. “Makes sense. I mean, she met Chevy for less than five minutes and picked up details about him that most people wouldn’t pick up on for days, if ever. And I’ve never seen anyone pick up signs as fast as her. Even if they remember the sign, most people fumble them at first until they get used to them.”

Castiel laughed. “I am definitely one of those people. I’ll be lucky to remember half the signs I learned today by tomorrow.” He watched Claire as she bent down, pointing at something on the ground before signing something to Sam. “Dean?” Dean hummed. “I’m sorry for whatever you went through as a child.”

Dean smiled sadly, not looking away from where Claire was now picking something up. “I’m sorry for whatever you and Claire went through.” His face lit back up as Claire started walking towards them, cupping something in her hand. “Uh oh, looks like she’s caught something.”

They both turned as Claire came up the porch steps. Castiel smiled as Claire stopped in front of them, her hands cupped gently around something. “What have you got there, Claire?”

Claire slowly opened her hands, revealing a grasshopper. She beamed up at them and gently signed something that Castiel assumed was the sign for grasshopper . 

“Grasshopper?” he confirmed. She nodded. “Wow! Aren’t you scared?” Claire rolled her eyes and shook her head. 

The grasshopper hopped from her hand up her arm. She grinned. He’s cool, huh, Papa?

“Yes, he’s very cool.” He watched as the grasshopper took a giant leap, landing on the railing between him and Dean, before leaping away into the bushes. Claire watched sadly as it disappeared. “It must be his bedtime. Just like it’s nearly yours.”

Noooooo. I wanna keep playing!

He heard Dean huff softly behind him. “We aren’t going anywhere, Little Bear. We can play tomorrow.”

Can I pet Chevy again tomorrow?

“You bet! After you help Eileen with the chickens, you come find me, OK?” He turned as Eileen and Sam came up the porch stairs. “We’ll see you tomorrow, ok?”

Goodnight!

They said their goodnights and goodbyes and Castiel took Claire’s hand to walk back to their cabin. “Ok, sweetheart,” he started once they were inside, “go brush your teeth and get ready for bed and I’ll come tuck you in in a minute.”

OK, Papa!

He gave her a few minutes after she was done in the bathroom to get changed and then made his way into her room. She was already under the covers, but he made a big show of tucking her up nice and snug. “Sweet dreams, Claire-bear. I love you.”

I love you, too, Papa. He smiled and kissed her goodnight. As he went to stand, her hand reached out and grabbed his wrist. Papa? I like it here.

“Me, too, sweetheart. Me, too.”

Chapter Text

They settled into a new routine fairly quickly. Castiel would wake Claire in the morning and make them both breakfast before Claire would run outside to help Eileen with the chickens. She loved helping with them, collecting the eggs and throwing food down for them. She especially loved the little chicks, and Castiel’s phone was soon full of pictures Eileen sent him of Claire holding the little babies. 

After her morning chores, as Claire insisted on calling it, complete with the correct signs, Castiel would settle on the cabin’s front porch with his laptop, working on his novel while Claire sat at the little table Dean had found for her and work on her school work. It was peaceful, working in the fresh air, no sirens or alarms piercing the solitude. Best of all, Claire was thriving.

Any rules the Winchesters had for their guests were soon abandoned as they all fell victim to Claire’s charm and they boiled everything down to one new rule - if a gate was closed, Claire wasn’t allowed through it. So, while she couldn’t enter the chicken coop or the horse pasture alone, she was now allowed in the barn or house whenever she pleased. Castiel tried to insist that this freedom wasn't necessary, but the Winchesters waived him off. Eileen was more than happy for Claire to visit in the house, spinning it as time for her to work on her ASL, which was improving at a rapidly increasing rate. Eileen had helped with that too, showing up a few days after they arrived with a children’s workbook of signs used on ranches that she’d made up for the kids when she did supply teaching. Claire had most of the signs down pat within a few days.

Dean, too, insisted he wasn’t bothered by Claire’s presence. The first time Castiel had noticed she’d wandered away and found her in the barn with Dean, he had rushed to apologize. Dean had been quick to let him know it wasn’t a big deal, that Claire was more than welcome, and, in fact, was a big help, explaining that a few days earlier Claire had found him putting food in the stalls for the horses’ dinner and she insisted on helping. Castiel had watched as Claire had run back and forth from a cart full of grain to each stall, dumping scoops of grain into each bucket, while Dean followed along behind her, throwing hay into each stall and moving the grain cart down the aisle. 

So, that, too, had become part of their routine. Breakfast. Morning chores. School work. Barn chores. Then, after lunch, they played, or watched a movie, or went for a walk. Regardless of what they did, Castiel found himself in an almost constant state of contentment. 

One morning, about three weeks after they’d arrived, Castiel was busy typing away while Claire did her homework, when he felt her tug his jeans. “Yes, sweetheart?”

Did you know Dean used to not talk too?

“Yes, I did. Did he tell you that?”

Claire nodded. I was sad because I didn’t know a sign or how to spell it and I said I wish I could talk and he told me he used to not talk but now he does and to not give up but even if I don’t ever talk again everyone will still love me.

Castiel smiled softly, taking her hand. “Dean is pretty nice, huh? Did that make you feel better?”

Claire nodded. Do you think he didn’t talk because his daddy died? Like Daddy?

“I don’t know, sweetheart. I didn’t ask. That’s something very personal so you shouldn’t ask either. Just like you don’t like when people ask you, right?”

Claire nodded. That’s what I thought, so I didn’t ask.

Castiel kissed the hand he was holding. “You’re very thoughtful, Claire. I know you don’t like when people ask you about Daddy, but if you want to talk about it, you can, you know.”

I know, Papa. But it makes me sad.

“I know, sweetpea.” He pulled her into his lap and held her close. “Sometimes,” he started, “the only way to feel less sad about something is to talk about it. When you’re ready. I’ll never force you to, OK?” He felt her nod against his chest and held her tight for a few minutes before setting her back down. “Are you done your homework?” When she nodded, he continued, “Why don’t you go play for a bit before lunch?” 

Claire nodded again and jumped off the porch, racing off towards the barn, no doubt to see if she could help Dean with something. Castiel settled back and continued working on his novel. He was so deep in his writing that he didn’t notice how much time had passed until his stomach started growling. Glancing at his watch, he realized it was well past the time they usually ate, so he packed away his laptop and went to find Claire. 

The first thing he noticed when he stepped into the barn was the water everywhere. The second thing he noticed was Dean, standing in front of him, soaking wet. (The third thing he noticed, which was without a doubt the reason he was so distracted, allowing the next event to happen, was how Dean’s shirt clung to his muscular torso, pebbled nipples standing at attention, biceps straining against the wet material.)

“Oh, uh, hey, Cas.” Dean shifted nervously. “You looking for Claire?” At Castiel’s nod, he went on. “She’s, uh, right…..here!” 

Dean jumped out of the way and the next thing Castiel knew, a jet of water was hitting him square in the face. He spluttered, blinking water out of his eyes to see Claire, who was also soaking wet, aiming a hose at him. Dean spun around to face her. “I think it’s time to run, Little Bear!” he said, full of glee, grabbing Claire’s hand and running with her out the barn. 

Castiel stood there for a moment in complete shock, before he turned on his heel and marched after the two troublemakers.

Dean prepared the horses’ dinner alone, wondering where his little helper was. There were days, though they were few, where she didn’t show up to help, usually if Cas had decided to go into town or something. He hadn’t heard their car leave though, so he figured they were busy doing other father/daughter things. He was just finishing filling the last few water buckets when Claire finally showed up. “Hey, Little Bear! Didn’t think you were gonna help me today!”

Claire scowled. I had too much homework. School is stupid. 

Dean laughed. “Ah, it’s not that bad. And you’re so smart it must be easy for you.” Claire just shrugged. “You wanna fill these last couple of buckets while I hang the rest in the stalls?”

Claire nodded and took the hose from him and Dean took the buckets he’d already filled to the stalls. When he turned back to her after the last one, he paused. She was still holding the hose, where usually she would have started rolling it back up. “Whatcha doing, Little Bear?” he asked cautiously. Claire grinned up at him, taking a step forward. His eyes widened. “Don’t even think about it!”

Claire’s smile grew as she pulled the trigger, blasting him with water. Her aim was good, hitting him right in the chest before she turned the nozzle higher, hitting him in the face. He was drenched when she finally released the trigger. Dean shook his head, meeting her eyes. They were full of mischief and glee. He took a step forward. “You know I’m gonna get you back for that, right?”

Claire’s eyes widened and she dropped the hose, turning to run. Dean chased after her, scooping up the nozzle on the way, shooting water after her. She darted into a stall and Dean pretended not to have seen her, stalking past her. “Come out, come out wherever you are!” he called, watching for her to exit the stall. When she did, he blasted her again. She ran down towards the tack room, Dean chasing after her. He had just passed the main barn door when Cas entered. Dean spun around. 

“Oh, uh, hey, Cas.” Dean saw Claire creep out of the tack room and felt her come up behind him. He handed her the hose, knowing she was thinking the same thing he was. He held up three fingers behind his back. “You looking for Claire?” Two fingers. At Castiel’s nod, he went on. “She’s, uh, right…..{one finger} here!” He darted out of the way and watched, laughing, as Claire soaked her father. 

Claire’s face was filled with joy and she laughed silently as she sprayed him. When she stopped, Castiel was dripping from head to foot, confusion etched into his handsome face. “I think it’s time to run, Little Bear!” he laughed, grabbing Claire’s hand and running out the barn. “Where should we hide?”

Behind the house?

“Good idea! Let’s go!” They ran around the back of the house where Eileen was hanging out laundry to dry. 

“What happened to you two?!” 

Dean grinned. “We had a water fight and then Cas came and Claire soaked him and now we’re hiding.”

Eileen shook her head. “You two are troublemakers,” she shook her finger sternly at them, but she was smiling. “Don’t expect me to help you hide.”

“Aww, come on Eileen!”

Yeah, come on, Eileen!

Dean grinned down at Claire. “We’re in so much trouble, aren’t we?”

No, just you.

“Why just me?!”

Because you’re the grown up. You should know better, Claire stated, matter of factly. 

Eileen laughed. “She’s right, you know.” 

Dean pouted. “Well, that’s not fair.”

“What’s not fair?” came Cas’ voice behind him. 

Dean spun around to see Cas, standing with his arms crossed, one brow raised. Dean swallowed. “Uhhh,” he said eloquently. 

Cas took a step forward. “Dean Winchester, have you been teaching my daughter how to be a troublemaker?”

“I mean, uh…she started it?”

Claire scowled up at him. Tattle tale.

Cas looked down at Claire. “Is that true? Did you start it?”

Yes, Papa, but Dean is a grown up and should know better.

“That is a very good point, Claire,” Cas stated calmly, slowly coming closer until he was right in front of Dean. “You, Dean, as the adult, should have known better.”

“I’m sorry?” Dean tried. 

Cas raised his eyebrow again. “Are you?”

“Not at all,” he breathed, a smile pulling at his lips, gaze lost in the deep blue of Cas’ eyes. 

Cas hummed. “That’s what I figured. So, know this, Dean Winchester. I will have my revenge. It may not be today, it may not be tomorrow. But it will happen. You might want to sleep with one eye open.” He turned to Claire. “Come on, sweetheart, it’s lunch time.”

And with that, Cas took Claire’s hand and walked away, leaving Dean struggling to catch his breath. “That was so fucking hot.”

Eileen just rolled her eyes and left him standing there.

A few days passed. Dean made Castiel an apology pie, even though Castiel wasn’t even really angry. He was secretly pleased that Dean had taken Claire under his wing, letting her have fun and play and be herself. That didn’t mean he wouldn’t seek his revenge, but it was out of good fun, not anger. 

Castiel was on the porch, looking over the school work Claire had done. He made a few corrections, showing her what she’d done wrong, before letting her go play (or wreak havoc with Dean, who actually knew anymore?). Claire had barely been gone five minutes when she came racing back towards him, tears streaming down her face. “Claire! What’s wrong?” he called, jumping to his feet.

Cartman got hurt, Papa! I was on the swings and he came to see me and he has a big cut on his side! Please, Papa, please help him! She tugged at his hand, pulling him quickly around behind the barn where Cartman was standing by the swingset, a large gash in his side. 

“Oh, buddy, what did you do?” he asked, kneeling next to the goat. Cartman blinked miserably back at him. “Claire? Do you know where Dean is? Would he be in the barn right now?”

I think so, Papa. 

“OK, I need you to run there and find him and tell him what happened. If he’s not there, run to the house and tell Eileen, OK? I’ll stay here and make sure Cartman is okay.” 

Claire sniffed but nodded her head, turning and running towards the barn. Cartman made to follow her, but Castiel wrapped an arm around his neck, holding him back, murmuring soft words to him. A few minutes later, Dean was rushing towards him.

“Meh-eh-eh,” bleated Cartman pitifully, as Dean knelt down next to him. 

“Yeah, I know, buddy. You were dumb and got hurt. Again.” He scratched the goat’s cheek before carefully poking at the gash in his side. “You’re gonna need stitches, you dumbass,” he told the goat fondly. “And you scared poor little Claire.” He glanced at Castiel. “She’s gone to fetch Eileen. Didn’t think anything scared that kid.”

Castiel huffed out a laugh. “She’s pretty tough, usually, but she doesn’t like when things get hurt. Though I think I was more scared than she was, seeing her running to me in tears.”

Dean smiled gently. “Same. I just about had a heart attack when she came flying into the barn crying. She’s probably tougher than both of us combined.”

“I wouldn’t doubt it,” Castiel replied, looking over as he saw Eileen and Claire running towards them, Claire carrying a bunch of towels and Eileen a bucket. 

Claire dumped the towels in Castiel’s lap so she could sign. Is he going to be OK?

“Yeah, sweetie,” Dean replied, “he’ll be OK. He’s gonna need some stitches though, so we’re gonna have to call Sam.”

“I’ll text him,” Eileen said, moving in to snap a pic of the wound to send to Sam and tapping away at her phone. Her phone vibrated a few minutes later. “He’s on his way. Said he’ll be here in about fifteen minutes.”

Dean nodded. “Alright, then, let’s get him cleaned up a bit.” He grabbed one of the towels and dipped it in the bucket of water Eileen had brought before gently starting to clean away the blood and bits of grass and dirt around the wound. 

Claire was still crying, so Castiel handed the towels to Eileen and pulled Claire into his lap. “Don’t cry, sweetheart. He’s OK. Look, Dean’s just cleaning the cut up so Sam can fix him properly.”

What are S-T-I-....S-T-I… she huffed. That thing Dean said.

Dean smiled over at her. “Stitches?” When she nodded, he showed her the sign. “Uhh, stitches are like sewing but on people and animals.” Castiel raised an eyebrow at his explanation and Dean just shrugged. “Like, when you have a hole in your clothes, Papa sews it together, right?” At Claire’s nod, he went on. “Well, stitches sew people and animals back together.”

Claire eyed him doubtfully before turning her gaze up to Castiel. He chuckled. “Dean’s right. Sam will sew Cartman’s skin together like I sew your clothes.”

Won’t that hurt?

“Nah, Sam will give him some medicine so he doesn’t feel it,” Dean replied, dropping his third towel and reaching for another one which he used to pat the wound and surrounding area dry with. “There, no more bits of grass or dirt. He’s all ready for Sam.”

“Doing my work for me, Dean?” came Sam’s voice. Castiel looked up to see Sam striding towards them, a bag of supplies slung over his shoulder. He knelt next to Dean in the grass, inspecting the wound. “Good job, as always,” he praised, slapping Dean on the shoulder. “Told ya you should’ve been a vet.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “Yeah, whatever, just fix the dam-darn goat.”

Sam smiled and started digging in his bag, pulling out a pair of clippers. 

What’s that?

“Those are clippers. Sam’s going to shave some of Cartman’s fur off so it’s not in the way and he can see the cut better,” Dean explained. “Now, it might look worse with the fur out of the way, but once Sam stitches him up, he’ll be good as new.”

“Until next time,” Sam muttered. 

“Until next time,” Dean agreed cheerfully, as though it was a given that this was not the last time they would be tending to the goat.

Sam finished clipping away Cartman’s fur, frowning down at the cut. “Do you know what he cut himself on? It’s pretty jagged.”

Dean shook his head. “Claire, do you know where Cartman was before you found him?”

He was over in the bushes, she answered pointing towards the edge of the horse paddock.

“Tree branch, probably,” Dean said and Sam made a noise of agreement.

“Alright,” Sam said, getting to his feet with Dean following. “Let’s make some room and we’ll sedate him and I’ll stitch him up.”

Claire jumped out of Castiel’s lap so he could stand and they moved a few feet away to stand next to Eileen. Sam crouched down to grab some things from his bag and when he stood, he was holding a large needle. He moved towards Cartman with it, when suddenly Claire ran forward.

No! No no no! Don’t hurt him!

“Claire, it’s OK. Sam’s not going to hurt him,” Castiel rushed to sooth her, reaching down to pick her up, but she pushed him away.

No, Papa, they can’t. They can’t! Tears had started streaming down her cheeks again. Please don’t hurt him! She turned to Dean who had crouched down next to her. Please, Dean, don’t! Don’t give him a needle. 

“Hey, Little Bear, it’s OK, we’re not going to hurt him, I promise.” He reached up and stroked her tears away. “We’re just giving him medicine so he won’t move around and so he won’t feel anything.”

Heart sinking, Castiel realized the problem, right before Claire announced it. NO! No needles! Daddy had needles and he died. He died! And now Cartman’s gonna die! She collapsed into Dean’s arms, sobbing silently.

Castiel closed his eyes, trying to will away his own tears. When he opened them, Dean was looking up at him helplessly, his strong hands so very gently caressing Claire’s back. Castiel took a deep breath and knelt down next to them.

“Claire, honey, come here,” he opened his arms as Claire turned away from Dean and into his own arms. “We talked about this, remember? Remember you had to get your tetanus shot a few months ago? You were scared then too, remember?” Claire nodded against his shoulder and Castiel squeezed her tightly. He was aware of Dean watching them, but he couldn’t face him as he said the next part. “Remember we talked about good medicine and bad medicine? Daddy took too much bad medicine. But your shot was good medicine and you were OK, right? And Sam has good medicine for Cartman. I promise, it’s not the same as what Daddy took.” He chanced a glance at Dean then, expecting pity but seeing only understanding.

Claire sniffed and pulled back a bit, looking up at Sam with red eyes. You promise?

“I promise, Claire,” Sam said seriously. “This is good medicine. It will make Cartman feel a little sleepy, just so he doesn’t move around while I fix him. Dean is gonna hold onto him and make sure he lies down safely. Then when he’s lying down I’m gonna spray him with another good medicine on his cut so he doesn’t feel the stitches. Do you know what stitches are?” he asked, not having been there for that conversation.

Claire nodded. Stitches are sewing on people and animals.

Sam’s lip twitched as he shot a look at Dean. “That’s exactly right. So I’ll stitch him up and give him a bandage and then we’ll take him to the barn so he can stay in a stall until he’s better. And then in about twenty minutes, he’ll start feeling more awake. How does that sound?”

Claire nodded sadly and let Castiel pull her away again. 

“Claire, we can go wait in the house if you want?” Eileen offered.

No, he’s my friend, I wanna stay.

Castiel sat on the ground so he could pull Claire back into his lap. “You’re very brave, Claire. I know you’re scared but it’s very brave to stay with your friend.”

They watched as Sam gave Cartman the sedative, Claire tensing when Cartman started to wobble, but Dean was there to catch him and lay him down. She relaxed a bit as Sam started stitching him up, even smiling as Dean started counting each stitch out loud in Count von Count’s voice, “One! Ah-ah-ah. Two! Ah-ah-ah.” He made it seven before Sam glared at him and he stopped, biting back a grin and shooting Claire a wink. 

When Sam was done and a bandage had been applied, he and Dean both stood. Dean turned to Claire then. “Hey, Little Bear, you know that empty stall next to Chevy’s?” At Claire’s nod, he went on. “You think you can run up and fill the water bucket in there?” Claire nodded.

“I’ll help you, Claire,” Eileen said, taking her hand. “We can get him some hay, too.” 

Castiel noticed Sam and Dean exchange a look before Sam said, “I’ll take Cartman and get him settled.”

“Thanks, Sammy,” Dean said, watching Sam lift the goat and head towards the barn. He turned to Castiel. “You OK?” he asked softly.

Castiel took a deep breath. “I will be. I’m sorry about….that…” he waved his hand helplessly. “I should’ve realized the needle would…” he broke off again. “I feel I owe you all an explanation.”

“You don’t owe us anything, Cas,” Dean said gently. “We’ll listen, of course, if you want to talk about it. But you don’t owe us anything.” 

He scrubbed at his eyes, turning away. “She was with him. When it happened. He had visitation every other weekend. I didn’t….I didn’t know he was using. We used to, in college. Just pot, but we stopped when we decided we wanted a baby.” He smiled softly. “She’s mine, you know. Biologically. We used a surrogate and,” he huffed a laugh, “well, you don’t need those details, I’m sure. But she’s mine. And I’d do anything for her. But I didn’t know.”

He felt a strong hand on his shoulder, grounding him. He took a breath. “We always met at the park when his visits were over. 5:00 pm every Sunday. But they didn’t come. I called and I texted. I waited and waited. I thought they’d just gone out and lost track of time. But they didn’t come.” He swiped a tear from his cheek. “I finally went to Bart’s apartment at 7:00. No one answered. I was so scared, Dean. I’ve never been more scared in my life. I didn’t know where my little girl was. I went down and found the building manager. He checked the security tapes and the only thing they showed was them entering the building Friday afternoon. I begged him to let me in the apartment, but he said he couldn’t without a warrant. So I called the police.” He laughed bitterly. “I thought they’d just show up and bust the door down, but apparently there are procedures . They needed proof that I was the custodial parent, which meant seeing a copy of the custody agreement. Which was in my apartment on the other side of the city.”

Castiel paused, shoving a hand through his hair angrily. “Have you ever been to New York, Dean?” Dean shook his head silently. “Traffic is just as bad as it’s shown on tv. It took me over an hour to get there and back. Another hour where I didn’t know where my little girl was.” Castiel’s tears were flowing freely now. “They finally broke the door down, but they wouldn’t let me in. In case it was a crime scene. They actually said that to me! I was yelling for Claire, but she wasn’t answering. There was a cop holding me back. He had a radio. And then a voice came over it. ‘One dead in the bedroom.’ I think my heart stopped then. I thought it was her, Dean. I think I collapsed. I couldn’t breathe. I thought I lost my baby.” His breaths were coming too fast. God, even now it was hard to remember that moment, the absolute pit of agony he’d experienced.

Strong arms surrounded him, pulling him in close. “Hey, shhh, it’s OK, Cas, she’s OK. God, I’m so sorry you had to go through that. But she’s OK.”

Castiel let himself be held a few minutes before pulling back and taking a shaky breath. “They brought her out a few minutes later. She’d been hiding in the closet. The autopsy said he’d probably died a few hours after he picked her up on Friday. Heroin overdose. He still had the needle in his arm when they found him. She was in there all weekend, alone, with her dead dad.” He shook his head sadly. “The doctors thought she was just in shock when she wouldn’t talk at the hospital, but then she just, you know, never started talking again.” 

Dean pulled him close again and Castiel let his tears fall as Dean spoke. “It’s not your fault, Cas.” He tightened his grip as Castiel tried to pull away. “No, listen. I know you blame yourself. Think you should’ve known about the drugs, or checked in on her sooner, or whatever. But you couldn’t have known. His choices aren’t on you.” Dean pulled back, his hands moving to Castiel’s face and gently wiping the tears away. “It’s not your fault,” he repeated. 

Castiel nodded. “I know that, logically. But it’s still hard not to think it, even after hours in my shrink’s chair talking about it.”

Dean smiled gently. “Does Claire see anyone? Someone she can talk to?”

Castiel shook his head. “We tried, but she got frustrated not knowing the signs or how to spell things. It started to make things worse.”

Dean took a step back, finally releasing Castiel. “Yeah, I get that. I had the same problem. Took a while to find someone who could read me without me having to say anything.” He paused, biting his lip. “Uhh, Missouri, my therapist, she’s still in town, if you want to maybe see if she clicks with Claire? She does video sessions, if you want to wait until you’re home. You know, just enjoy your vacation?”

“Oh, I..I don’t know,” Castiel started, but Dean cut him off.

“You don’t gotta decide right now, man. Just think about it.”

Castiel nodded and they continued towards the barn. Before they made it to the others, Castiel stopped, Dean stopping next to him. “Um, thank you, for back there. I know you didn’t expect all the emotional baggage to come out today. But uh, thanks for listening.”

Dean just smiled, grabbed his hand and tugged him along. “That’s what friends are for, Cas.” 

Castiel made Claire a late lunch after they returned from the barn and they sat at the little kitchen table to eat.

Papa, were you crying before?

“Yes, sweetie, I was.”

Why?

“I told Dean what happened to Daddy and it made me sad.”

It makes me sad too.

“I know, sweetheart,” Castiel said, stroking her hair. “I know you were upset earlier, too. Are you feeling better?” Claire just shrugged, so Castiel asked, “What can I do to cheer you up?”

Claire thought about it for a moment. Can you make Cartman a sweater? I don’t want him to get cold since Sam cut his fur off.

“Oh, uhh, I can try? I don’t really know how to make a sweater for a goat…”

You should Google it!

Castiel laughed. “OK, I will once we finish eating.” 

So, after cleaning up their dishes and wiping the table, Castiel pulled his laptop out and did a quick Google search for goat sweaters, immediately smiling at the hundreds of pictures of goats in sweaters, blankets and pajamas that flooded his screen. He called Claire over to show her.

They’re so cute, Papa!

“I agree,” he responded, scrolling through some instructions for converting a sweatshirt into a goat shirt. “It will take too long to knit a sweater, but this looks pretty easy. We could drive over to Emporia and see if there are any sweaters at Goodwill that would fit? It’s only about half an hour from here.”

Claire nodded her agreement, so they got ready and headed out. They stopped in the barn for Castiel to quickly take some measurements of Cartman, and half an hour later, they were stepping into the Goodwill store. “Alright, sweetheart,” Castiel started, leading Claire over to the men’s section, “let’s see what they’ve got. You start at this end and I’ll start at the other, OK?” Claire nodded and Castiel left her at the end of the aisle and made his way down to the other end.

He perused through the sweatshirts, getting flashbacks of his own childhood as he flipped past sweaters containing the likes of Bugs Bunny and Marvin the Martian. The sweaters were in various states, some looking almost brand new, others full of holes and questionable looking stains. Castiel grimaced and flipped past those ones quickly. 

Claire appeared beside him, tugging his jacket. I found one, Papa! Come look! She grabbed his hand and pulled him down the aisle, stopping and grabbing hold of a sweater. Castiel pulled the hanger off the rack to get a better look. It was black, with bright geometric shapes covering it - triangle, circles, squares, even squiggly lines - in a range of bright colors - hot pink, neon yellow, and what Castiel could only describe as radioactive green. It was straight out of a 1980s fashion nightmare.

Isn’t it pretty, Papa? Claire asked, stroking the sleeve reverently.

That was…not the word Castiel would use. “It’s very, uh, retro,” he offered.

What’s that mean?

“It means old fashioned. I don’t know the sign,” he told her, anticipating her next question. “We’ll have to ask when we get back to the ranch.”

Can we get this one, Papa? Please?

Castiel looked back to the sweater. It was an extra large and Castiel pulled out his measuring tape and confirmed it would fit. There weren’t any holes or stains he could see, in fact, it looked almost brand new, as though no one had ever worn the monstrosity. Castiel couldn’t blame them. And it was only $4.99. He looked down at Claire and saw her beaming up at him. He smiled back. “Yeah, baby, we can get this one.”

Yay! Thank you, Papa!

Castiel shook his head fondly as Claire wrapped her arms around his legs in a hug. Grabbing the sweater in one hand and Claire’s hand in the other, he made his way toward the checkout and then the car. He thought over the design in his head on the drive, and by the time they reached the ranch, he had a plan.

He settled Claire at the table before grabbing his portable sewing machine from his room. He’d been thankful he’d brought it when Claire had ripped her shirt on only their third day on the ranch, and it had been used several times since then. Thankful once again that he wouldn’t have to hand sew, he settled next to Claire at the table. “Do you want to watch something while I do this? It shouldn’t take too long.”

Can I watch that show Dean said Cartman is in? Umm….South Park?

“Let’s see if it’s on Netflix,” he responded, opening his laptop and searching. Sure enough, a screenshot of four little kids quickly popped up. Castiel smiled. He’d heard of the show but never seen it, and it looked kind of cute. He clicked on the link for season one and immediately noticed what looked like a Christmas special. Figuring a special probably wouldn’t rely on any backstory Claire wouldn’t know, he clicked it, set the laptop in front of her, and lost himself in crafting. 

He didn’t really have much to do. He figured short sleeves would be easier to put on Cartman, so he’d have to shorten the sleeves, and he needed to add a strap to go around Cartman’s butt, under his tail, to stop it from bunching around his front half, but that was about it. He set about cutting the sleeves to t-shirt length, sewing the elastic cuffs ( elastic cuffs! What were the ‘80s thinking?! ) back into place, smiling as the children on his laptop sang about Christmas. Or whatever, he wasn’t really paying attention, focused as he was on getting the sleeve lengths the same ( It’s for a goat , he reminded himself. It doesn’t have to be perfect ). When the sleeves were done, he laid out the sweater and measured it, calculating how long the butt strap should be, before taking the extra sleeve material and sewing in the strap. He double checked all his stitches before holding it up to inspect. “What do you think, Claire?” he asked, turning towards her.

His jaw dropped. Claire was in a fit of silent laughter, tears streaming down her face. And on the screen of his laptop was a dancing, singing, piece of shit. He stared, utterly confused. “Claire…what? What’s happening?”

Claire looked up, her eyes shining with tears and laughter. He’s a Christmas pooh! 

He looked back to the screen where the credits were, thankfully, now rolling. “Uhh, maybe this isn’t a show for kids, sweetheart,” he told her, closing the laptop with a little more force than necessary and making a mental note to actually look into what the show was about. “Anyway, what do you think?” He held up the sweater for her to see.

It looks good, Papa! Can we put it on him now?

Castiel glanced out the back window. The sun was starting to set and he could see the herd of horses moving towards the barn. “I think the horses are about to come in for their dinner. Let’s wait a bit so we’re not in the way. Why don’t you play for a bit and then we’ll have supper and then we’ll take it to him. How’s that sound?”

Claire nodded her agreement, sliding off the chair and wandering off to play with her toys. Castiel spent the next little while checking his emails, responding to his editor and his cousin, before starting in on making dinner. Finally, after Claire had helped him clear the table, they made their way out to the barn. 

The light was on, and as they entered Sam popped his head out of Cartman’s stall. “Hey, guys! Coming to check on your buddy?”

Claire nodded, running up to him. Is he OK?

Sam smiled down at her. “He’s doing just fine. He ate all his dinner and I just put a clean bandage on.” He looked at the bundle of material in Castiel’s hand. “Whatcha got there?”

Papa made Cartman a sweater!

Sam raised an eyebrow in amusement as Castiel held up the sweater. “Claire was worried he’d get cold because you shaved his fur,” he explained with a shrug.

Sam took in the sweater, biting back an amused grin. “That’s very thoughtful of you, Claire,” he told her seriously. “It will help keep his bandage clean, too. What a great idea!”

Claire beamed and turned away to pet Cartman while Sam winked at Castiel. “Dean is going to flip,” Sam said quietly. “You couldn’t find something a little less…uhh…colorful?”

“Claire picked it and as I’m sure you’ve discovered, it’s nearly impossible to say no to her.”

Sam laughed, taking the sweater from Castiel. “Alright, Cartman, let’s get you dressed!” He stepped in next to Claire and they made quick work of dressing the surprisingly cooperative goat. The three of them stood back to take in their work. Despite the garish sweater, Cartman actually looked kind of cute.

“Meh-eh-eh.”

He likes it, Papa! He looks so pretty! Claire had full on heart-eyes going as she stared at the goat.

Sam had already pulled out his phone and was taking pictures. “He looks great! You did a great job choosing a sweater, Claire! I can’t wait to show Eileen pictures!”

Castiel pulled out his own phone to take some pictures, getting a few of just Cartman and a few of Claire with him. After a few minutes of Claire fussing over the goat, he called her over. “We should let Cartman get some rest so he heals up fast, sweetheart.”

OK, Papa. Claire gave Cartman a few goodnight kisses before taking Castiel’s hand. The three humans walked towards the barn door before Castiel and Claire bid goodnight to Sam. 

As he was tucking Claire in, she pulled him into a hug. I’m sorry I made you sad, Papa.

“Oh, sweetheart, you didn’t make me sad. I just get sad when I think about Daddy and what you went through. And it upset me that you were so upset. I’m sorry, Claire. I should have realized the needle would scare you and explained it to you beforehand.” He stroked the hair back from her forehead. “I thought you were very brave to try and protect Cartman,” he said softly.

I didn’t understand but now I do. Sam wouldn’t hurt Cartman. He was just trying to help. And he said the sweater was a good idea!

“It was a great idea, sweetheart. It will help keep the wound clean and heal faster. Now, try and get some sleep and we’ll go visit him in the morning, OK?”

Claire nodded sleepily. I love you, Papa.

“I love you, too, Claire-bear.”

Dean closed the barn’s side door after the last horse had walked back out to the pasture, thanking the day he’d extended the pasture fence up to the barn door so he didn’t have to walk each horse out. Now he could just open their stall doors and they’d trot back out the door directly into the pasture. When it was time for them to come in to eat, he just opened the door and they all filed into their respective stalls. It had taken less than a week for the horses to figure out the routine.

Dean whistled as he got to work cleaning out the stalls. It didn’t take long, seeing as the horses only came in to eat twice a day during the summer, so there wasn’t a lot of manure droppings or wet straw to clean out. He made quick work of it, dumping the wheelbarrow out on the manure pile behind the barn before deciding to check in on Cartman. Sam had checked on him that morning as Dean brought the horses in, feeding him and cleaning his stall while he was there, so Dean hadn’t bothered checking on him himself yet.

He paused as he looked over the stall door. “What the fuck?”

Cartman was munching on some hay, looking perfectly content. He didn’t seem at all fazed by the outright awful looking sweater he was wearing. Dean couldn’t stop staring, despite the fact the monstrosity hurt to look at. He was so shocked by the vision, he didn’t even hear Cas and Claire come in. Dean distantly felt a tug on his sleeve and had to physically tear his eyes away from Cartman. He looked down at Claire in confusion.

Do you like Cartman’s sweater?! she asked, eagerly.

Dean’s eyes widened. Of course it was Claire’s idea. If it had been Sam or Eileen he’d have no problem teasing the fuck out of them. But Claire looked so earnest…

“Uhh…yeah, it’s umm…very, retro?” he tried.

Claire grinned. That’s what Papa said! She turned and opened the stall door, rushing over to snuggle the goat.

Dean turned to Cas, who had the gall to laugh at him. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” Cas laughed.

Dean shook his head. “Is this my life now?” he wondered aloud. “I don’t know where I went wrong.”

Cas laughed again. “You don’t like it?”

Dean widened his eyes in mock disbelief. “You do?!”

“Absolutely not,” he said quietly so Claire wouldn’t hear him. “I can’t believe anyone ever thought they could look good in that.”

“Oh, I dunno, Cas, I bet you would look sexy as fuck in that sweater,” Dean grinned with a wink.

“Dean, I don’t think even you would look good in that monstrosity.”

Dean blushed and turned back to Claire. “You gonna help me get the horses’ dinner ready, Little Bear?”

She nodded and exited the stall. Guess what?

“Chicken butt?” Dean answered.

Claire rolled her eyes. No! I watched that show! With Cartman! There was a Christmas pooh! It was sooo funny. And with that she ran off to drag the feed cart out of the tack room.

Dean’s jaw dropped and he swung around to face Cas. “You let her watch South Park ?!”

It was Cas’ turn to blush. “I’d never actually seen it before and thought it was just a kid’s cartoon. I’ve since been made aware that it is definitely not suitable for a six year old.”

Dean stared in horror before he burst out laughing. Man, if this was his life now, he was loving it!

Chapter Text

September faded into October, the nights cooling off but the days staying pleasantly warm. The leaves started changing colors but clung steadfast to the trees, surrounding the ranch in bursts of color that Castiel and Claire would have been hard pressed to find in New York. Cartman’s wound healed but Claire insisted he liked his sweater, and since she had all the adults wrapped around her finger, the sweater stayed. In fact, Castiel and Claire had returned to the Goodwill store and bought more sweaters for him, finding the most colorful, outlandish sweaters they could. Dean just rolled his eyes and acted annoyed, but the twinkle in his eyes betrayed him.

One morning, mid-way through the second week of October, Claire had just returned from helping Eileen with the chickens and finished washing her hands when there was a knock on the cabin door. “You expecting company?” Castiel teased Claire. She stuck her tongue out but shook her head, following him to the door.

Eileen and Dean stood on the porch. “Good morning, Castiel,” Eileen said brightly. “I’m going into town to the library and wondered if Claire wanted to come?” 

Claire looked up at him with big eyes. Can I, Papa?

“Sure, sweetheart, but you have to behave and listen to Eileen, OK?” At Claire’s nod he turned back to Eileen. “I’ll have to get her booster seat from my car,” he told her, but she waved him off.

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll take Dean’s truck. He still has Ben’s booster seat set up.” She turned to Claire. “Are you ready?” Claire nodded and took her hand, waving goodbye. 

Castiel turned to Dean, wondering who Ben was. His question must have shown on his face because Dean laughed. “Ben’s my ex’s kid. We were together long enough for me to get a booster seat and then once we broke up I figured Sam and Eileen would have a kid eventually, so I never got rid of it,” he explained.

“Oh,” Castiel responded, still processing the information. “You must miss him.”

Dean just shrugged. “I still see him every now and then. Go to some of his ball games. Take him for pizza or whatever. Lisa is engaged now, but she’s a cool girl. Thinks the more people looking out for Ben the better.”

Castiel nodded. “I can understand that. I feel the same way about Claire. It’s nice knowing she has you and Sam and Eileen looking out for her. Even if it is temporary.”

Dean frowned at that. “Hey, you may only be here temporarily, but our feelings for Claire, for both of you, aren’t just gonna disappear when you head home. You’re family now, Cas. Sorry, but you’re stuck with us.” He smiled suddenly and clapped his hands together. “Anyway! The girls are gone, so it’s just us and I’ve got plans. Put your boots on and meet me in the barn in ten minutes.” He didn’t give Castiel time to respond before bounding off the porch and heading towards the barn.

Castiel smiled to himself as he found his hiking boots and laced them up. Family. He hadn’t had a real family in so long, it felt weird to use the word, but it fit. The Winchesters had welcomed him and Claire with open arms, despite their baggage. His mind went back to what Dean had said about Ben and his heart warmed further. He knew Dean was special, had known it from the moment he started signing with Claire, but knowing he stepped into the role of Dad for someone else’s child, and kept on with the role when his relationship had ended, made him seem that much more special in Castiel’s eyes. He didn’t doubt that once he and Claire were home, Dean would keep in touch. 

Of course the thought of Dean playing dad immediately brought up a picture of him being Claire’s dad. It was a heartwarming picture, but Castiel knew he couldn’t get his hopes up like that. As far as he knew, Dean was straight. Besides, they’d only known each other for a little over a month.

Pushing that thought aside, Castiel wandered out to the barn where he found Dean, Chevy and another horse waiting with saddles on. He walked up to the new horse and stroked its nose. It was a pretty golden color with a black mane and tail. “Hello, there. You’re a pretty one.”

Dean smiled at him over the horse’s back. “Takes one to know one,” he teased, patting the horse and coming around to its front. “This here is Lucy. She’s a buckskin, that’s what her coloring is called, and she’s an appendix quarter horse. That means she’s mostly quarter horse but has some thoroughbred in her, like Chevy.” He grinned at Castiel. “She’s your ride for today!”

Castiel took a startled step back. “Uh, what? Dean, no. I’ve never ridden a horse in my life.” He stared at the horse in front of him, silently calculating how far a fall from her back would be. 

Dean scoffed. “You think I’d let you get hurt, Cas? Come on, man. Lucy’ll take care of you. She’s a good girl, really quiet. Trust me.”

Castiel looked from Lucy to Dean. From deep brown eyes to vibrant green ones. He nodded. “OK.”

“OK! Let’s do this!” Dean led the horses from the barn and over towards what looked like a small set of stairs. He dropped Chevy’s reins, leaving him standing a few feet away as he led Lucy in front of the stairs. “Mounting block,” he told Cas. “Makes it easier to get on. Come on up.”

Castiel climbed the few steps and stood nervously next to the horse. “OK,” Dean continued, “you’re gonna put your left hand here on the horn, right on the back of the saddle. Left foot in the stirrup and then just stand up in it and swing your right leg over, moving your right hand out of the way as you go.”

Castiel stared at the stirrup, the horn, the back of the saddle, trying to put the pieces together in his head. “Dean, I’m not sure I’m coordinated enough for this.”

“Just try, Cas. I promise it’s easier than it sounds.”

OK, he could do this. He put his hands where Dean had told him before putting his foot in the stirrup. He closed his eyes for a moment, took a deep breath, and when he opened them, he swung up and into the saddle. “Oh, that was easy.”

Dean laughed gleefully. “See? Nothing to it.” He showed Castiel how to hold the reins and gave him a quick rundown on how to use them. “Squeeze your legs gently to get her to walk forward. Lift the reins up and back slightly to get her to stop,” he explained, showing Cas where his hand should be to ask for a stop. “If you do that while she’s already stopped, she’ll step backwards until you lower your hand again. Go on and try it.”

Castiel nervously lifted his hand up and back and Lucy took a few steps back until he lowered it again. She stopped instantly and he released the breath he’d been holding.

“Good! Now, if you want to turn left, move your hand to the left so the right rein touches her neck.” He demonstrated and Lucy turned her head but didn’t move. “Move right to turn right. Don’t worry too much about it though, she’ll mostly just follow me and Chev. You ready?” he grinned up at Castiel from the ground.

“I guess so?”

“OK, we’ll work on your enthusiasm next time,” Dean teased, moving away from Lucy and grabbing Chevy’s reins. Castiel had a moment of panic as he stepped away, but Lucy didn’t move a muscle. Dean swung up onto Chevy in one graceful motion and Castiel couldn’t help staring at how perfectly his ass looked as it settled into the saddle. He blinked away the thought as Dean turned to look back at him. “Here we go!”

He nudged Chevy forward towards the cabins and Castiel gently squeezed his legs against Lucy’s sides, praying she wouldn’t bolt. She didn’t, she just calmly started walking after Chevy. Castiel relaxed a tiny fraction. 

They followed Dean past the cabins towards the woods, and as they got closer, Castiel saw a path leading through them. Dean turned Chevy into the woods and Castiel followed.

Dean turned back as they walked. “The path through the woods isn’t too far. Once we’re out in the meadow, we can ride side-by-side.” Castiel just nodded, too busy concentrating on not falling off or giving Lucy any mixed signals. “Relax, Cas. She’s not gonna take off. I promise.”

“How can you promise that, Dean?” Castiel scowled. “What if a bear jumped out right now? Are you saying she wouldn’t run?”

“Ain’t no bears in Kansas, Cas. What you really have to worry about are bobcats!” With that, he turned away from Castiel. 

“Bobcats? Are you serious?” He could see Dean’s shoulders shaking. “Dean. Dean! I swear to God, Dean, if I get eaten by a bobcat I will haunt your ass!”

Dean turned around again with a cheeky grin. “Ooh, baby, talk dirty to me.” Castiel turned his scowl up to an even ten. Dean just laughed harder. “You’re cute when you pout, Cas.”

Castiel glared at him to no avail. Dean just laughed and turned back around, whistling happily. Castiel shook his head with a fond smile on his lips. Dean was infuriatingly annoying, but he looked so good doing it.

A few minutes later, the trees started thinning out and Castiel could see the meadow in front of them. Dean halted Chevy and let Castiel come up beside them, stopping Lucy next to them. Castiel was busy taking in the view when Chevy suddenly jerked his head up, snorting and pawing the ground. “Yeah, I see ‘em,” Dean said quietly, patting his neck. Lucy, for her part, just looked around quietly in the direction Chevy was staring.

“What is it?” Castiel asked, somewhat alarmed, but actually calmed a bit by Lucy’s lack of reaction. He couldn’t see what had Chevy tossing his head.

“Deer,” Dean told him, pointing towards the far end of the meadow. 

Castiel squinted, eyes scanning the horizon for a moment before he saw them. About half a dozen deer were standing alert, staring in their direction for a moment, before apparently realizing they posed no threat and lowering their heads to continue grazing. Castiel grinned. “I’ve never seen a deer before,” he told Dean excitedly. “I mean, not outside of a zoo.”

“What, you don’t have deer hanging out in Times Square?” he teased. Castiel huffed a laugh. “We’ve got all kinds of wildlife out here. Deer, elk, antelope. All kinds of birds - turkeys and cranes and pheasants and whatnot. And of course, the usual suspects - coyotes, foxes, skunks, raccoons.”

“Bobcats?” Castiel asked suspiciously.

Dean laughed. “Yeah, they’re around, but they’re pretty secretive. I’ve only ever seen one. Sam’s never seen any. They keep to themselves. There’s enough small prey for them around here that they don’t bother the cattle so we don’t bother them.”

Castiel nodded. “I guess I won’t be haunting your ass any time soon then.”

Dean grinned. “And ain’t that a shame?” He looked back at the deer. “Come on, we’ll go the opposite way so we don’t bother them.” He nudged Chevy into a walk and Castiel urged Lucy beside him. 

They walked through the meadow, the tall grass brushing the horses’ bellies. Dean pointed out the occasional rabbit or bird as they went. They spotted half a dozen different birds, and Dean knew what each one was. Castiel listened in awe as they rode, not having much to add but enjoying Dean’s lessons. 

After a while, they crested a small hill that looked out over the valley. Dean pulled Chevy to a stop and Castiel followed suit with Lucy. “Wow,” he breathed. It felt like he could see for miles from here. In fact, if he squinted….yes, he could. He could see the town and the road to the farm. He looked down into the valley. “Oh! Are those your cows?”

Dean grinned. “That’s them! Our land is bordered by the road on two sides,” he said pointing out the roads, “and it goes back that way” he pointed across the valley “to that hill in the distance. And then that way,” he pointed to the left, “well, you can’t see the border from here because of the forest.”

“How much land do you have?”

“Ah, we’re a pretty small operation. We’ve got about eight hundred head of cattle on a thousand acres.”

Castiel’s jaw dropped. “That’s a ‘small operation’?” he asked in disbelief.

Dean laughed. “Yeah, some of the big ranches are over ten thousand acres.”

“Holy shit.”

“Takes some getting used to, eh city boy?”

Castiel shook his head. “It really does. I’ve never seen so much open space in my life. It’s kind of mind boggling.”

Dean hummed thoughtfully. “I guess I’m the same,” he mused. “I can’t imagine what it’d be like crammed into a building full of hundreds of other people, surrounded by thousands of other buildings just like it. Or the noise, man,” he shuddered dramatically. “How do you stand it?”

“I guess you just get used to tuning it out. The noise, the people, the confinement. It’s…” he paused in thought. “It’s actually pretty awful,” he conceded with a laugh.

“Well, you’re here now, so let’s enjoy it!” He jumped down off Chevy and made his way to Castiel’s left side. “Alright, cowboy, take your right foot out of the stirrup, then stand in the left one and lean forward a bit while you swing your right leg over and step down.”

Castiel bit his lip as he concentrated and tried not to fall on his ass. He got his right foot back on the ground but stumbled as he tried to kick his left foot out the stirrup, but Dean was right there, steadying him with a strong hand on his back. Castiel blushed as he turned to face him. “That, uh, wasn’t quite so easy.”

“Yeah, I would’ve warned you, but didn’t want to make you more nervous. Here, hold her reins a sec.” He passed Castiel Lucy’s reins and began to dig around in one of the packs attached to Chevy’s saddle. He pulled something out and knelt down beside Lucy’s front legs, attaching what looked like padded handcuffs to her legs. He did the same with Chevy before standing and facing Castiel. “Hobbles, so they don’t wander off,” he explained.

Castiel raised a brow. “I have a similar pair at home,” he remarked nonchalantly. “Guess I should’ve brought them.”

Dean’s eyes flew to his own, a faint blush on his cheeks. “Uh, that’s, umm. I mean…” his cheeks puffed out as he held his breath before releasing it on a harsh exhale. “I have no idea what to say to that.”

Castiel hummed. “I usually pair mine with a gag, so you wouldn’t have to say anything.” He turned and pulled his phone out and began taking pictures of the valley, leaving Dean spluttering behind him. 

“Wait, Cas, are you serious? Cas! Is this payback for the bobcat thing? Cas?! ” Castiel bit his lip to suppress his laughter as he turned back to Dean, who glared at him. “Oh, you asshole! You know what, Cas? I’m not gonna share my pie with you now!” 

Castiel laughed as Dean stomped over to Chevy and grabbed a rolled up tarp that was attached to his saddle. He unrolled it, revealing a blanket, which he spread out on the ground before grabbing the two saddle bags that hung on either side of Chevy and tossing them down. Castiel’s heart softened as Dean unpacked sandwiches, drinks and tupperware that held slices of pie. “You packed a picnic?”

Dean rolled his eyes. “Well, I thought you were a nice guy, but I’m having second thoughts now,” he grumped. 

Castiel settled on the blanket next to Dean, who rolled his eyes and passed him a sandwich. “Thank you, Dean. This is very nice.”

Dean just shrugged. “Figured you could use a break from being 24/7 dad.”

Castiel hummed. “Don’t get me wrong - I wouldn’t trade being Claire’s dad for anything, but adult conversation is something I’ve missed.”

“Alright, then, what you wanna talk about?”

“Whatever you want, Dean. This was your idea.”

Dean thought for a moment. “Tell me about yourself. All I know is you’re a single dad from New York. And a writer. What do you write? Articles?”

Castiel shook his head as he swallowed his bite. “I’m a novelist.”

“Anything I’d know?”

“I doubt it. It’s a very niche market.”

“Hmmm…what are the books about?”

“In a nutshell? Two brothers fighting the supernatural.”

Dean went very still, his eyes wide. “Shut the fuck up!”

Castiel blanched. “I’m sorry?”

“No fucking way!” He was shaking his head in disbelief. “You’re…no…are you? Oh, my god! You’re Carver Edlund! ”

“You know my books?”

Dean’s eyes almost popped out of their sockets. “Know them? Know them?! Dude! The last two that came out, me and Charlie drove two hours to the nearest bookstore that was having a midnight sale! We stood in line for six hours to get copies!” 

“Oh, uh, thank you? For your support?” Castiel really didn’t know what to say. He used a pen name for precisely this reason - to not have to deal with fans. “I could sign your copies if you want?”

Dean smiled shyly at him. “That would be awesome!” He suddenly grabbed one of the tupperwares of pie and shoved it at Castiel. “I take it back. You can have pie!”

Castiel took the offering with a suspicious squint. “Are you trying to bribe me for details on what my next book is about?”

“No! I wouldn’t!” He paused and bit his lip. “Can I have a clue?”

Castiel laughed. “No.”

“Awww, come on!”

“No.”

“Cas…”

Castiel took a bite of pie. “Mmm this is delicious! But no.” 

Dean pouted, but his eyes twinkled. They finished their lunch, exchanging stories of growing up in such vastly different worlds. Castiel learned the ranch had been in Dean’s family for generations and that it used to be much larger, but he and Sam had sold off a large chunk when Sam decided he wanted to be a vet. “He works for our Uncle Bobby now. Well, I say uncle, but he’s not actually related to us. He was dad’s best friend growing up. He owns the vet clinic in town and when he retires he’s gonna sign it over to Sam.”

Castiel, in turn, told Dean about growing up in New York, not even leaving the city to go to university. “My parents kicked me out when I came out to them and cut me off. I had scholarships that paid my tuition, but nowhere to stay. Luckily, my older cousin Gabriel took me in and let me live with him rent-free for four years.” 

They chatted for a couple of hours before deciding to head back. Dean removed Lucy’s hobble and came up behind Castiel, who was trying to figure out how to get on without the mounting block. “Alright, so this is probably gonna not be quite as graceful,” Dean started, “but you’re gonna bend your left leg and I’m gonna grab it and hoist you up. Hands on the saddle.”

Castiel turned to stare at Dean in confusion. “You can’t lift me, Dean. I’m way too heavy.”

Dean rolled his eyes with a scoff. “Well, the only other way is to get on like I do. Foot in the stirrup and haul your own ass up.”

Castiel turned back to Lucy and eyed the saddle. He was fairly confident he could get his foot in the stirrup and then it was the simple matter of just…stepping up. Way up.

Way, way up, it turned out. It was not a simple matter. At all. By the time Castiel was seated, he was almost out of breath. “Next time I’m letting you lift me.”

“Nope,” Dean replied with a smirk. “You chose the hard way, you’re stuck with it.”

He turned to Chevy, removed his hobble, and swung up into his own saddle, again making it look effortless. “You make it look so easy,” Castiel pouted. 

“You stick with me, Cas, and you’ll be a pro in no time!”

They chatted easily on the way back and before Castiel realized, they were emerging from the woods just as Eileen and Claire were getting out of the car. Castiel could see Claire’s eyes bulging from where he was. They pulled to a stop near the girls.

Papa! I wanna ride a horse! she pouted. No fair!

“You’ll have to ask Dean, sweetheart. He’s in charge of the horses.”

Claire turned her big blue puppy dog eyes on Dean. Can I? Please, Dean?

“Sure, Little Bear, but just a short ride cause the horses are tired, OK?”

Claire nodded eagerly and Dean swung down. He helped Castiel dismount and handed him Lucy’s reins. “I’ll just take her around the yard a few times. Chevy will take care of her.”

Castiel nodded and let Dean lift Claire up onto Chevy’s back. “Hang tight to the horn, Little Bear. Are you ready?”

Claire beamed down at him and nodded again. Let’s go!

They set off on a circuit around the yard, Castiel watching cautiously as Claire clung to the saddle horn. He trusted Dean and, by extension, Chevy, but it was such a long way for his little girl to fall. 

“She’ll be OK, Papa,” said Eileen, coming up beside him and wrapping an arm around his waist. “Dean would never let anything happen to her.” She paused and they both waved back when Claire waved happily at them. “She’s gonna want a pony now, you know.”

“Make it a package deal of a pony and Dean and I’m all in.”

Eileen raised an eyebrow questioningly. “Is that so?”

“Well, I’m not shoveling it’s shit,” he deflected. 

Eileen laughed. “Here, let me take Lucy. Go take some pictures of your little one.”

Castiel nodded and handed her the reins and she disappeared off to the barn. He pulled out his phone just as the trio came back into view around the side of the house and he started snapping pictures. Dean stopped Chevy so Castiel could get some good shots, both him and Claire smiling brightly. 

Yes, Castiel thought, checking out the photos, I’d definitely take that package deal.

A storm blew in a few days after their trail ride, the rain soaking the ground and the horses and lashing against the window pains. Dean ran out and opened the gate from the pasture to the meadow so the horses could seek refuge in the woods. Even Cartman stayed in the barn of his own accord. Cas and Claire raced to the house at Dean’s invite and they spent the day watching kids' movies. Actual kids' movies, not South Park . Dean still couldn’t believe Cas had let that happen. Dean and Claire fell asleep on the couch curled up together, and Dean awoke a few hours later to a stiff back, a puddle of drool on his shirt from Claire, and the softest smile he’d ever seen from Cas.

Maybe the storm wasn’t so bad after all.

Of course, big storms meant having to check on the cattle and the fences, so Dean spent the next few days doing just that. The horses had emerged from the shelter of the trees and made their way back up to the barn, impatiently waiting for their meals, so after Dean had fed and checked them all over, he saddled up Chevy and rode out. It would be a multi-day effort to check all the fence lines, but the weather had calmed and there was nowhere Dean would rather be than in the saddle. Or Cas’ pants, his traitorous mind whispered.

The first two days yielded nothing exciting. The cattle were fine, having weathered the storm in the trees with the horses, and the fences were in good shape. Dean made a few mental notes of areas that should be replaced in the next year or two, but for the most part, everything was fine.

On the third and hopefully last day, Dean set out to check the fence line on the far side of the valley. There was a service road that ran by it, separating their land from the neighboring nature preserve, but Dean ultimately decided to take Chevy out again. The weather was nice, and they could both use a good gallop across the meadow. They were about a third of the way along the fence line when Chevy pulled up short with a snort.

“What’s wrong, buddy? What do you see?” Dean stood up in the stirrups and peered around, trying to see what Chevy saw. Seeing nothing, he urged the horse forward. 

He smelled it before he saw it.

Just across the service road, a dead mare lay in the grass, a small foal nuzzling against it. “Shit,” Dean swore softly, nudging Chevy closer to the fence. He could see burn marks on the mare and the air held the scent of burnt flesh. She’d been hit by lightning. “Dammit.”

He turned Chevy and urged him into a lope, heading back the way they’d come from to the nearest gate. Once through, he headed back down the service road towards the mare and foal. He jumped down, tied Chevy to the fence, and slowly approached the foal. 

“Hey, baby. Where’s your family? They leave you behind?” The foal pricked its ears and took a hesitant step towards him, too young to be afraid of humans and too scared to be alone any longer. “Come on, sweetie, we’ll take care of you.” Chevy knickered behind him and the foal swung its head towards him. “That’s Chevy. He’s an orphan like you. You wanna come home with us?” The foal took a few wobbly steps forward until Dean could scratch behind its ears. “There you go, sweetheart. Let’s take a look at you.” He stood slowly and gently examined the little foal. It looked about five or six months old, too young to be weaned. It was probably starving after three days without its mother’s milk, but otherwise looked relatively unscathed. And, with a quick look underneath, Dean determined it was a girl. She was a pretty little palomino, creamy gold body and pristine white mane and tail.

Dean pulled out his phone and fired off a text to Eileen, asking her to bring his truck up to the service road. She responded quickly, so Dean settled in to wait, leaning back against a fence post with the foal beside him, stroking its neck and face gently. Eileen arrived about ten minutes later, pulling up slowly so she didn’t startle the foal. She grimaced as she saw the mare. “Lightning?”

Dean nodded. “Yeah. Little one must not have been too close or it would’ve got her too. Looks like the herd moved on but she wouldn’t leave her momma.” He stroked the little filly’s nose. “She’s too young to be weaned. We can’t leave her, she won’t make it.”

Eileen nodded. “We’ve still got a bit of milk replacement from that orphaned calf in the spring, but we’ll need more. How are we going to get her home?”

“I guess I’ll sit in the truck bed and hold her and lead Chevy and you drive? It’ll be slow but I don’t want to leave Chev out here alone.”

“Alright, let’s do this.” 

Dean stood and the two of them managed to lift the foal into the bed of the truck. Dean climbed up next to her and managed to pull her into his lap, stroking her nose to calm her. Eileen untied Chevy and led him over, handing the reins to Dean. “Buckle in, this is gonna be a long and bumpy ride.” 

By the time they got back to the ranch, Dean’s ass was sore, and not in a good way. He groaned as Eileen pulled to a stop. He could see twin looks of concern from Cas and Claire from where they stood on their cabin porch and they quickly started walking over.

Eileen jumped out the truck and seeing Cas and Claire on the way, turned to Dean. “I’ll go get a bottle ready.”

Dean nodded. “Thanks, Eileen.” He turned to Cas and Claire as they approached. “Hey, guys!”

“Dean, are you OK?” Cas asked approaching the side of the truck. His eyes grew wide as he noticed the foal. “Oh. That is not what I expected.”

What is it, Papa?

Dean grinned down at Claire over the side of the truck. “I got us a new friend, Little Bear!”

Papa, let me see! Claire demanded, holding her hands up so Cas could lift her into his arms. Her jaw dropped when she saw the foal. A baby horse! Papa! Look! It’s a baby! She turned to Dean. What’s a baby horse called?

“It’s called a foal. A girl is a filly and a boy is a colt,” Dean told her, showing her the signs. “This one is a little girl.”

“Where did she come from?” asked Cas.

“Found her on the other side of the fence line, the one across the valley. Lightning got the mom and the herd moved on without her. She’s too young to be on her own, so I brought her home.”

Cas shook his head, a fond smile on his face. “You take in all the orphans, don’t you?”

Dean smiled brightly. “Took in you two, didn’t I?” he teased. “Come on, let’s get her in the barn. Claire, can you move Chevy out the way?”

Claire nodded and squirmed out of Cas’ arms, grabbing the reins and marching to the back of the truck to Chevy. She put both hands on his chest and started shoving with all her might. Cas made a move as though to help, but Dean put a gentle hand on his arm. “She’s OK, Cas. She’s got this,” he said quietly. He glanced up at Cas and noticed he looked nervous. “Hey, trust me. I wouldn’t do anything that would let her get hurt.” Cas bit his lip, but nodded, and Dean turned back in time to see Chevy start moving backwards, away from the truck. After half a dozen steps or so, Dean called out, “That’s good, Claire! Thank you!”

Eileen appeared with a bottle for the foal. “Do you guys need help?”

“Nah, we got this. You’re teaching tomorrow right?” At Eileen’s nod, he went on. “We’re good. Go finish your lesson plan. Thanks for the rescue.” Eileen waved off his thanks and returned to the house.

Dean shimmied out from under the foal, standing it upright and leading it towards the tailgate before reaching over and opening it. “Alright, Cas, gonna need your muscles here,” he said as he jumped down. “Here, you grab her front end, and I’ll grab her back end. Ready?”

Cas nodded and they hoisted the little filly down to the ground. She took a few steps towards Chevy who reached down over Claire’s shoulder and nuzzled the foal. Dean turned to Cas. “You want to take baby and I’ll take Chevy?”

I can take Chevy!

“Uhhh…” Dean looked between Cas and Claire. “Let me talk to Papa for a second, OK?” At her nod, he turned to Cas, speaking quietly. “I know you want to say no. But Cas,” he made sure Cas met his eyes, “she can do this. I swear, I would never let anything hurt her. She’s led him before with me right beside her. She knows what to do. I know you don’t trust the horses, but trust me .” Cas bit his lip and Dean wanted so badly to reach up and sooth it. Eventually Cas nodded. 

“Alright, I trust you.”

Dean grinned and turned back to Claire. “Alright, Little Bear, lead the way!” They both watched as Claire tugged Chevy forwards, leading him towards the barn. She did everything perfectly and Dean felt a lurch of pride for her. He handed Cas the bottle and they followed along behind, Dean leading the little filly slowly.

“What else have you taught her?”

“Oh, uh, bunch of stuff. How to groom him, what the different brushes are for. How to saddle and bridle him, not that she can lift the saddle, but she knows where everything attaches. Uhh…How to tie a quick release knot. Man! I only showed her once and she had it down pat!” He suddenly felt a lurch of nerves run through him. He’d never actually asked Cas if he could teach Claire how to work around the horses. “You don’t mind, do you? That I taught her all this? I swear, I only ever let her work with Chevy. Fuck, I should’ve asked! I’m sorry, Cas. It’s just, she’s so smart, you know. She’s like a little sponge, just soaking everything up! She always wants to know exactly what I’m doing and why. And once I’ve explained it, she wants me to go over it all again just using sign language.” He realized he was rambling and took a breath. “Are you mad?” He couldn’t face Cas, so he kept his eyes glued to Claire as she led Chevy through the barn doors.

“No, Dean, I’m not mad. Not at all. If anything I’m grateful that you’ve been so kind to her. Are you sure she’s not getting in the way, though? You don’t have to answer all her questions you know.”

“It’s no bother, Cas. God, not at all. She’s such a great kid.” He stopped as the filly balked at entering the barn. “Shhh, baby, it’s OK. I know, you’ve never seen a building before, huh? It’s OK. Gonna keep you nice and warm and fed in here.” He coaxed her slowly to step over the threshold and she seemed to relax when she saw Chevy. “Why don’t you help Claire with Chevy while I get this one settled and fed? Ask her to show you a quick release knot. Bet ya can’t get it on the first try!”

“What do I get if I win?”

Dean laughed. “Don’t even worry about it, man, you ain't gonna win.”  He watched as Cas scowled at him before turning and marching over to Claire. And hey, if his gaze lingered a bit too long on Cas’ ass? Who was gonna know?

Castiel approached Claire, who was struggling to get a strap on the saddle undone. “Do you need help?”

Claire nodded and showed him what needed unbuckling. When everything was undone, she turned to him. Now it goes in the tack room! It’s too heavy for me though.

Castiel nodded and pulled the saddle off Chevy, following behind Claire to the tack room. She showed him where the saddle went while she climbed up on the feed cart to hang his bridle up. She then grabbed a tote of brushes and left the tack room.

Castiel followed along behind, amazed at how quickly she seemed to have picked everything up. “Hey, Claire? Dean said I should ask you how to do a quick release knot.”

Claire glanced up at him. OK! She led him to where Chevy’s lead rope was tied to a ring attached to the wall. Look, you just pull here and it comes loose! She demonstrated. Now you go like this. Castiel watched as she looped and moved the rope around. All done!

“Uhh…can you show me again? Maybe a bit slower?” He heard Dean snort from the stall across the aisle. 

Claire huffed and showed him again. And again. And again. Castiel had just finished his first attempt when Dean approached. He took one look and shook his head. “Claire, you wanna tell your Papa what’s wrong?”

Claire came closer and took one look before heaving her shoulders in a dramatic sigh. It’s backwards, Papa.

“What? No it’s not.” Castiel pulled on the end of the rope but nothing happened. “Umm…”

Dean laughed and reached around him, tugging on the end that was attached to Chevy’s halter. It came loose right away. “Backwards,” he repeated. “You just lost your ride.” Castiel scowled and Dean clapped him on the shoulder. “Told ya it wasn’t easy. Come on,” he continued, tying the rope back up, “we’ll show you how to brush Chevy.”

Claire and Dean showed him what brushes to use and in what order. Ten minutes later, Chevy was nice and clean while Castiel was covered in dirt. Somehow, Dean and Claire remained spotless. He shook his head in defeat. He needed a lot more lessons before he caught up to even Claire’s level.

Dean took Chevy out to the pasture and when he came back, he grabbed a notebook and pen from the tack room before sinking down on some bales of hay. “Alright, we gotta go into town for supplies for the baby. Let’s make a list of what we need. First off, she’s gonna need a name.”

Castiel smiled as Claire climbed into Dean’s lap to help. Can I name her?

“Depends what you want to call her,” he smiled down at her. “Do you have an idea?”

She nodded. I don’t know the name sign for it though. Or how to spell it. It’s from my show.

“Your My Little Pony show?” Castiel asked.

Yeah! My favorite one! The orange one!

Dean glanced up at him. “You know which one that is, Papa?”

Castiel shook his head. “No, but we can Google it later.”

Dean nodded. “OK, name’s on hold for now. What else do we need?”

Brushes!

Dean made a note on the paper. “OK, brushes. Oh, a blanket since winter will be here soon,” he made another note. “What else?”

“More milk?” Castiel suggested.

“Definitely gonna need more milk,” Dean confirmed, writing it down. 

A halter! And a lead rope!

Dean wrote it down. “Alright, brushes, blanket, halter and lead, milk. And once we have a name we’ll get a nameplate for the stall door. Anything else?”

“Applejack.”

Castiel’s breath caught in his throat at Claire’s barely audible whisper. Her eyes widened in shock and he saw a flash of fear in them before she turned and burrowed her face in Dean’s chest. Castiel met Dean’s eyes.

Do not make a big deal out of this!! Dean signed frantically, shaking his head. Castiel opened his mouth to say something, but Dean’s hands moved again. Cas, don’t. Trust me.

Castiel nodded and kept his mouth shut. Dean’s hand came up to stroke Claire’s hair. “Applejack, huh?” he said in a perfectly controlled voice. “Applejack. Ap-ple-jack,” he strung the word out. “I like it. We can call her AJ for short. What do you think, Cas?” He looked up at Castiel.

Castiel cleared his throat, trying to will away the rush of emotions that were threatening to overspill. “I think it’s really cool.”

Dean smiled softly at him and Castiel knew that Dean knew he wasn’t just talking about the name. Claire peeked her eyes out and Dean looked down at her. “You like that name?” She nodded. “Alright, it’s settled then. Look,” he tore a page out of the book and wrote the filly’s new name down. “This is how you spell it. Why don’t you run up to the house and ask Eileen to help you make a name sign and Papa and I will finish up here.”

Claire hesitantly took the paper, her eyes darting between the two of them. “Well, go on. Don’t make me chase you out of here with the hose!” Dean teased her. She smiled shyly at him before turning and running out the barn.

Castiel watched her go, his brain a whirlwind of emotions and thoughts. “Jesus, Christ,” he heard Dean swear, thunking his head back on the stall door. “You alright, Cas?”

Castiel turned to him. “Dean…” he could barely speak.

Dean jumped to his feet and rushed over. “Hey, hey, you’re OK. Jesus, you look like you’re gonna fall over. Come on.” He wrapped a strong arm around Castiel’s shoulders and herded him to the hay bales. “Sit. Breathe. You’re OK.”

Castiel’s eyes blurred as he tried to suck in a deep breath. “Dean, she…I don’t…what? Dean…”

“OK, buddy, I’m gonna need you to try actual sentences,” Dean teased gently. “Just try to breathe. You’re as pale as a ghost and I don’t want you passing out on me.” He rubbed soothing circles on Castiel’s back. “I know it’s a lot, but you’re fine and she’s fine. Deep breaths, come on now.”

Castiel matched Dean’s breathing, focusing on the hand on his back. His head cleared a little and he relaxed, letting his head fall on Dean’s shoulder. “That’s the first thing she’s said in almost a year,” he whispered. “I should’ve said something. Why did you stop me?”

Dean sighed and swiped his hand over his face. “When I was a kid,” he started, “when I wasn’t talking, it wasn’t because I didn’t want to. God, I wanted to more than anything. I just…couldn’t. It was like there was, I dunno…a balloon or something, lodged in my throat, and every time I tried to talk, it inflated and I couldn’t get the words past it.” He paused, and Castiel looked up to find him chewing on his lip in thought. “I’m not saying that’s what Claire feels, but I bet it’s something similar.” Castiel nodded. Claire had tried to explain that the words got stuck, but without knowing the proper signs, she hadn’t been able to fully explain. 

Dean stared at the wall across from them as he continued. “When Sammy started talking, I wanted to be able to talk to him. Help him learn, you know? But I couldn’t. Not until after tons of therapy, and even then it was near impossible to get the words out. And then, one night, it just happened. I couldn’t tell you what was different about that night, just like I bet Claire has no idea how she just got that word out.” He shook his head as he chuckled. “My first word was burgers. ” Castiel laughed softly and Dean glanced down at him with a smile. “We were at Bobby’s and he asked what we wanted for dinner and it just came out.”

His eyes drifted back across the aisle to the wall. “Shit, you’d think it was the Second Coming or something by how everyone reacted. Hugs all around, even from my dad who was not a hugger. Ellen cried. I think I even saw Bobby swipe a few tears away. They made such a big deal out of it. They were so happy. And when the words stopped coming, I felt like such a piece of shit. Even then, they were encouraging, saying if I spoke once I could do it again. But I couldn’t.

“I couldn’t understand why that one word got out and the rest got stuck. I felt like I’d broken everyone all over again. I tried, over and over, and I just kept failing. And I could see the disappointment in their eyes.”

“Dean, it wasn’t your fault,” Castiel told him softly. “You were just a kid.”

“I know, Cas. Well, I know now . But at the time? I felt like such a failure. And everytime I had to sign after that I could see their disappointment all over again.”

He sat back and turned to Castiel. “I ain’t got no right telling you how to parent your kid, Cas. I know that. But you saw it, right? The fear in her eyes? If you’d made a big deal out of it, I guarantee she would’ve felt the same way I did. You just gotta try and act normal when it happens, like it’s no big deal whether she speaks or signs. If you don’t believe me, there’s tons of research about it online.” He closed his eyes and Castiel waited him out. “It’s just…if I can protect her from having to feel like that, I gotta try.” 

A tear slid from Dean’s eye and Castiel reached up and brushed it away gently. “I understand, Dean. Thank you for telling me all that. The last thing I want is to make Claire feel bad. I didn’t even think that encouraging her could make her feel worse.” He realized his hand was still cupping Dean’s face and pulled it away, his cheeks heating. “We should go find her and go into town.”

Dean nodded and got to his feet, grabbing Castiel’s hand and pulling him up. “Yeah, come on. We got some shopping to do.”

They collected Claire, who happily showed them the name sign she and Eileen had come up with for Applejack, (the sign for apple morphing into the letter ‘j’) before climbing into Dean’s truck and heading to town. The ride was quick, Dean singing along loudly to the rock tunes playing from the radio, and before Castiel knew it, they were pulling into the parking lot of the feed and tack store. 

“Dean!” They heard as they entered. The trio turned to see Charlie rushing over and Dean pulled her into a hug, smacking a kiss on her cheek. “I haven’t seen you in forever! Got new friends, huh?” she teased, smiling at Castiel and Claire. 

Dean just rolled his eyes. “Yeah, you remember Cas, right? And this is Claire.” He turned to Claire. “Do you remember Charlie’s name sign?”

Claire nodded and showed him the sign, making Charlie grin. “Dean tells me you’ve been helping him out a lot,” she said to Claire.

Claire smiled shyly. Dean found a baby horse! We have to buy stuff for it.

Charlie’s jaw dropped as she turned to Dean. “Another orphan, huh? I’m gonna need you to send me pictures, Winchester.”

“Yeah, yeah, I will. Why don’t you help Cas and Claire pick out a halter while I go grab some milk replacement?”

“Sure!” Dean left towards the back of the store and Charlie directed the Novaks down the aisle. She looked down as Claire tugged her shirt.

Are you Dean’s girlfriend?

“Absolutely not!” she said brightly. “Why do you ask?”

He hugged you and gave you a kiss, Claire explained.

Charlie laughed. “No, we’ve just been best friends since kindergarten. Besides, I don’t like boys like that.”

Claire’s eyes widened as realization dawned. Oh! You’re gay! Like Papa!

“Umm…” Charlie looked to Castiel helplessly, but Claire had already turned to him and was signing.

What’s that word again? For girls that are gay? Like Miss Stevie?

Castiel sighed inwardly. “Lesbian,” he told her, reminding her of the sign. “But remember what we talked about, Claire? About not announcing to strangers when people are gay?”

Claire frowned. Charlie’s not a stranger. She’s Dean’s friend. That makes her my friend, too!

Castiel’s heart softened at that. “OK, that’s true. But you still shouldn’t just tell people that. Remember what I told you?”

About the mean people?

“That’s right. Some people are very mean to people like me and Charlie.”

And Dean. 

“And me what?” came Dean’s voice from behind them. Castiel barely heard him, wondering what on earth Claire was talking about. 

She couldn’t mean…

Dean turned back into the aisle where he’d left the wayward trio just in time to see Claire sign and Dean.

“And me what?” he asked, pausing to take in the three of them. Claire looked sad. Charlie was biting back a grin. And Cas was staring thoughtfully into space. Knowing he’d get nothing useful from Charlie, and with Cas seemingly lost in his own brain, he turned to Claire. “Alright, Little Bear, spill. What’s got you looking so sad?”

I don’t want people to be mean to you and Papa and Charlie!

“Uhh, OK…what people?”

The ones who are mean to people like you and Papa and Charlie! Damn, she looked annoyed now, but Dean still wasn’t getting it.

“People like me and Papa and Charlie? What do you mean, Claire?”

Claire rolled her eyes so hard Dean was surprised she remained standing. 

She pointed at Cas. Gay!

She pointed at Charlie. Lesbian!

She pointed straight at Dean. Half gay!

Charlie made a squealing sound and clapped her hand over her mouth. Dean could see her shoulders shaking. He looked at Cas who looked doubly confused now. Dean was sure he looked just as lost. Claire looked at all three of them before throwing her hands in the air dramatically. Grownups! She stomped off down the aisle towards the back of the store.

“Half gay?” Dean asked weakly. 

Charlie lost it. “Oh my god!” she laughed. “Dean! Dean, you’re half gay! That is brilliant!” She paused, growing serious and clutching at Dean’s shirt. “I love her. Can we keep her, Dean? Can we?” Dean shoved her away and she dissolved into peals of laughter.

“What the hell were you guys talking about? I was gone for five minutes!”

“She asked if I was your girlfriend and I told her I don’t like boys that way. So she just, like, announced that I was gay, like Castiel.” 

Cas picked up the story. “I reminded her that she shouldn’t out people because not everyone is accepting. I’ve told her before that some people can be very mean.”

“Yeah, so Cas goes,” Charlie dropped her voice to imitate Cas, “‘ Some people are mean to people like me and Charlie ,’” Dean snorted at the impression while Cas just rolled his eyes. “And she jumps in with ‘ and Dean .’”

Dean rubbed at his temple. How was this his life? “Wait,” he said suddenly, turning to Cas, “she knows the signs for gay and lesbian but I’m just half gay? How does she even know that I’m half gay?” He sighed. The term was going to stick, he just knew it.

“Dean, I don’t even know what she means by that!”

Dean just blinked at Cas. Once. Twice. “Dude. She means bi.”

“Yeah, Cas, geez, keep up!” Charlie teased. 

“Oh,” said Cas. “I didn’t know.”

“Uhh, yeah you did.”

“Dean, I assure you, I didn’t.”

“Dude! I’ve been flirting with you for weeks! I’ve called you pretty or sexy like half a dozen times in the last week alone! I took you on a picnic trail ride!” 

“Awwww,” said Charlie. Dean shot her a glare.

“I thought you were just being friendly,” Cas explained. 

“Losing your touch, Winchester.”

Dean rounded on Charlie and pointed a finger in her face. “You take that back, Charles! Dean Winchester does not lose his touch!” Charlie just laughed.

Dean looked between Cas and Charlie and shook his head before stomping down the aisle after Claire. He found her looking at cowboy boots and he sank down on the cushioned bench used for trying them on. “Hey, Little Bear,” he said tiredly.

She glanced over at him. Are you guys done being dumb?

Dean sighed. “Probably not,” he confessed as Cas and Charlie appeared. “Can I talk to you for a sec?” Claire climbed up onto the bench next to him. “Umm, what you called me just now? Uh, half gay? What did you mean by that?”

Because you like boys and girls. I didn’t know the word for it.

“Right. Uh, the word is bi ,” he said, showing her the sign. “Bi means two. So because I like boys and girls, I’m bi.” She nodded in understanding. “Umm, how did you know I’m bi?”

I was helping Eileen put pictures in an album and there were pictures of you with a boy. I asked who he was and she said he used to be your boyfriend. She said his name was Michael.

Dean made a mental note to find those pictures and destroy them. Michael had turned out to be a Grade A douchenozzle. “How did you know I didn’t like just boys?”

She looked at him like he was stupid. Because you had a girlfriend before, too. Ben’s mom.

Jesus Christ, this kid picks up on everything , Dean thought. 

Did I tell your secret? Are you mad at me?

“What? No! No, sweetheart. Charlie already knew. Papa didn’t but I thought he did and I don’t mind him knowing. But he’s right, you know. You have to be careful about who you say things like that to. Some people are really mean.”

I’m sorry.

“It’s OK, Little Bear. No one’s mad at you. Hey, why don’t you and Charlie go pick a halter for Applejack. I wanna talk to Papa for a sec, OK?”

Claire nodded and her and Charlie made their way back up the aisle. Cas sank down on the bench next to him. “Your kid’s gonna be the death of me, man.”

Cas huffed. “You and me both.” He picked at a non-existent thread on his jeans. “Umm, sorry she outed you.”

It was Dean’s turn to huff. “Did you really not know?” Cas shook his head. “Maybe I am losing my touch,” he mused. 

“Maybe I just didn’t want to get my hopes up,” Cas said quietly. 

Dean’s heart rate picked up. He glanced over at Cas and saw him looking down at the floor, a faint blush pinking his cheeks. Dean licked his lips. “So, does that, umm…does that mean you’d say yes if I asked you out?” 

Cas looked up at him through his eyelashes, a shy smile on his lips. God, Dean wanted to kiss those lips. “Are you asking?”

Dean’s lips curved up. “You saying yes?”

Cas bit his lip as he nodded. “Yes. I’d like that.”

“Awesome,” Dean breathed, then cleared his throat. “Friday night. Six o’clock. I’ll pick you up.” 

They both looked up as they saw Claire waving at them down the aisle. Papa! Dean! Come look!

“What about Claire?” Cas asked as he stood. 

“She can hang out with Sam and Eileen. They can have a movie night while I wine and dine you.”

Cas smiled down at him where he still sat on the bench. “It’s a date. I look forward to it.” He turned and made his way back to Claire.

Dean watched him go, a stupid grin on his face. 

Seriously, how was this his life?

Chapter Text

The next few days passed both extremely quickly and excruciatingly slowly. Dean split his time between his usual chores and taking care of Applejack. The little foal took to the bottle with no problem, sucking down every drop Dean offered her. It wasn’t long before Claire was begging to try, and he couldn’t help the tug in his heart as he watched her bottle feed the little filly. 

He spent a few days getting Applejack used to wearing a halter and teaching her to be led, Claire watching from her seat on the hay bales in the aisle, silently cheering with each step forward Applejack made. Once the filly had figured out what he wanted, she followed him placidly up and down the aisle. 

“You want to try, Little Bear?”

Claire’s eyes widened. Can I?!

“Sure. She’s a fast learner. Come on over.” Claire jumped down from the hay bales and approached slowly, stroking Applejack’s nose when she got close. Dean handed her the lead line. “OK, just remember, she’s still learning and she might get confused that it’s not me leading her, so if she doesn’t move right away, just keep pulling gently, OK?”

Claire nodded seriously and took a step away, tugging gently at the rope. Applejack hesitated, but then took a step after her. She followed Claire all the way down the aisle and back, stopping next to Dean. They both turned at Cas’ voice, neither having noticed he’d entered the barn. “That looked really good, Claire!”

Claire beamed at Cas. That was my first time! I think she likes me!

Dean chuckled. “Of course she likes you! Everyone likes you!” Claire just rolled her eyes, but she was smiling brightly. “Why don’t you take her again and then we can put her in her stall?”

Claire nodded and set off again with Applejack. Dean turned to Cas. “She’s a natural.”

Cas smiled softly, eyes still watching Claire. “She has a good teacher.”

Dean bumped his shoulder into Cas’ with a laugh. “You don’t gotta butter me up, man. I ain’t planning on canceling our date.”

“Where are we going?”

“Nope, not telling. You just be ready at six. Don’t gotta dress up all fancy or nothing. Just wear something comfortable. Eileen’s gonna come grab Claire a little before six.” Dean looked down as Claire arrived back with Applejack. “You excited for a movie night with Sam and Eileen?”

Claire nodded. She said we could watch a movie about a wild horse named Spirit!

“Oh, yeah, that’s one of my favorites,” Dean told her, and it wasn’t even a lie. “You’ll love it!”

Are you and Papa gonna kiss?

Cas made a spluttering sound but Dean just laughed. “That ain’t none of your business, kiddo. Now go on, get out of here, both of you. I got stuff to do before I take Papa on a date.” He took Applejack’s lead from Claire and turned to Cas. “See you later, handsome.”

Cas blushed prettily before scurrying away with Claire. Dean watched them go before tucking Applejack safely back into her stall. She was steadily gaining weight and had started eating hay and grain. Soon Dean would start introducing her to the other horses. 

But, that was a future!Dean problem. Today!Dean had a date to get ready for.

“No, turn it more, more, Sam! OK, that’s good.” Dean stepped back a few paces to survey their work. 

Sam came and stood beside him, throwing him Bitchface #12. “It looks exactly the same as before we moved it.”

“No, it doesn’t. It was crooked before. Now it’s straight.”

“Like you know anything about being straight,” Sam muttered.

Dean punched him in the arm. “Shut the fuck up and get the lights. We’re running out of time.” 

“Maybe we should’ve started earlier.”

“We couldn’t start earlier, asshat. What if he’d seen?”

“Whatever,” Sam sighed, passing Dean a string of lights. “Just hurry up. You’re stressing me out and it’s not even my date.”

They finished quickly and made their way back to the house. Dean went to check on dinner, taking note of the time. 5:39. He had just enough time for a quick shower. “Alright, Sammy, you know what you’re doing?”

Sam rolled his eyes. “Yes, Dean. We’ve been over it a hundred times. Everything is fine. Go get ready.

Dean nodded, clapping Sam’s shoulder on his way past. “Thanks, Sammy.”

“It’s Sam,” he sighed in exasperation, but Dean had already closed the bathroom door.

At precisely six o’clock, there was a knock at the door. Castiel took one last look in the mirror, smoothing out the vest he wore over his button up, before striding to the door. He took a deep, calming breath and opened it.

Holy fuck. He was not prepared for this.

Dean stood on the porch in a pair of dark blue jeans that hugged him in all the right places. If Castiel had had any doubt about Dean’s bowleggedness, they evaporated in an instant. His breath caught as a fleeting image of those legs wrapped around him flitted through his brain. Dragging his eyes up Dean’s form, he took in the deep red button up, the five o’clock shadow that Castiel was glad he hadn’t shaved, and his twinkling peridot eyes. He looked both casual and put together. He looked perfect. Castiel moistened his lips with his tongue, noting how Dean tracked the movement. “Hello, Dean.”

Dean dragged his eyes up to meet Castiel’s, a shy smile on his lips. “Hi, Cas.” His eyes flicked down over Castiel’s body again before darting back up. “You look fucking amazing.”

Castiel looked down at his own outfit, a pair of dark jeans, a dark gray shirt, a black vest and a bright red tie. It was his go-to casual date outfit. He’d been told it was a good look on him, but he didn’t think he came close to looking as good as Dean did. “Funny, I was just thinking the same about you,” he said, eyes dragging slowly down Dean’s frame. He glanced back up at Dean, taking in the blush on his cheeks. “You look good enough to eat.”

He watched in amusement as Dean’s eyes widened and darkened. “Uhh,” he tried, then cleared his throat. “Jesus, Cas, you can’t just say things like that.” His blush darkened. 

Castiel hummed thoughtfully, stepping in close to Dean. “If you’re going to look that pretty, Dean, expect me to tell you.” He stepped back, watching Dean swallow. “Now, where are we going?”

Dean shook himself off. “Uh, right. It’s a surprise, so umm…” He pulled a black silk scarf from his back pocket. “Can I, uh, blindfold you?”

Castiel grinned. Dean was making this way too easy. “Hmmm, and here I thought I was the one who’d be blindfolding you .” He reached out and ran his fingers over the scarf. “This would go nicely with those cuffs of mine I told you about.” He laughed as Dean’s jaw dropped.

“Jesus Christ,” Dean muttered. “Just turn around, would’ya?”

Castiel obliged and Dean settled the blindfold over his eyes, tying it snuggly in the back. “Can you see anything?”

Castiel shook his head. “Not a thing.”

“Good. OK, take my arm and just trust me. Alright, here’s the steps, easy now.” Dean managed to lead him down the porch steps without any injury and Castiel relaxed into the hold he had on Dean’s arm. 

They only walked for a few minutes, the ground under Castiel’s feet changing from the paved walkway by the cabins to the gravel of the parking area and then grass. He had a vague idea of where they were, but no idea why they were there. He let himself trust in Dean, knowing he himself would know soon enough. They paused for a moment, the squeak of a rusty hinge the only sound in the night, before moving on. 

They came to a stop, Castiel’s hand still holding onto Dean’s arm. He heard Dean take a breath. “OK, I’m gonna take the blindfold off, but keep your eyes closed for a sec.” Castiel nodded and Dean gently removed the blindfold before stepping back beside Castiel. “OK, you can open ‘em.”

Castiel opened his eyes and let out a small gasp of delight. “Dean,” he breathed.

They were in the horse pasture, the horses grazing peacefully, the sun setting over the hills in the distance. There was a white marquis tent sent up, three sided with the open side facing them. Fairy lights and delicate lanterns were strung inside the tent, illuminating the inside in a soft, warm glow. A table and chairs were set up next to a cart on which there was a silver, covered serving tray. Soft music was drifting from inside the tent.

Castiel turned to Dean. “You did all this?”

Dean shrugged. “Sam helped me set it up. And he brought the food out when I came to get you.”

“But it was your idea?”

Dean blushed and looked at the ground as he nodded. “Is it OK?”

“It’s perfect.”

Dean blew out a breath and Castiel noticed the tension he’d been holding in his shoulders loosen. “Well, then, Mr. Novak, after you.”

Castiel smiled as Dean took his arm and led him to the table, even going so far as to pull the chair out for him. “Such a gentleman, Mr. Winchester,” he teased.

Dean blushed again and turned to the cart. He grabbed a covered basket, placed it on the table and turned back to the cart, removing the serving tray lid. Castiel was immediately hit with an overload of delicious aromas. Dean turned back with two plates in his hands, which he placed on the table, before pulling the cloth off the basket. “Alright, so we’ve got garlic bread and lasagna, homemade, of course, and, oh,” he reached under the cart and pulled out a bottle of wine, “wine.” He uncorked the wine and poured some into the glasses on the table, before taking his seat opposite Castiel. “I hope this is OK?” He chewed his bottom lip nervously. 

“I can’t believe you did all this,” Castiel told him. “Thank you, Dean.”

Dean smiled shyly and picked up his knife and fork. “Bon appetit,” he said, before his smile turned into a grin, “or as we say ‘round these parts, dig in!”

Castiel smiled back, picking up his own cutlery and cutting a bite. He groaned as the flavors exploded in his mouth. “Dean,” he said after swallowing, “this is delicious!” He took a piece of garlic bread from the basket and took a bite. “Mmm,” he mumbled around the food, waiting until he swallowed to finish, “where did you learn to cook?”

Dean shrugged. “I dunno, just kinda picked it up, I guess. Mom died when we were little and dad was busy with the ranch so I just kinda took over feeding me and Sammy.” He shrugged again, not meeting Castiel’s eyes. “It ain’t 4-Star New York fine dining by any means.”

Castiel snorted. “New York fine dining is overrated, Dean. Trust me. You pay $100 for a serving that’s a quarter of this size. Sure, it tastes good, but you still go home hungry. I’d much rather have a good home cooked meal.” He paused, ducking his head to meet Dean’s eyes. “Especially if it’s as good as this, with company that’s even better.”

“Yeah?”

Castiel nodded. “Yeah.” He took another bite of lasagna, nodding as he chewed. “Delicious,” he repeated.

“Well, I’m glad you like it.”  He took his own piece of garlic bread and chewed thoughtfully for a moment. “So if New York fine dining isn’t all it’s cracked up to be, what kinda place do you like to go to?”

“It depends. If I’m going out with Claire, there are a lot of mom and pop places in our neighborhood that are really good. Lots of diversity. If I’m going out with friends, we usually go to a pub.” Castiel took a sip of wine. “What about you? I know Hartford is pretty small, but what do you like?”

“Ah, I’m a simple man, Cas. I hit up the Roadhouse every now and then for some good ol’ fashioned diner food and when I want to change it up a bit, my friend Benny has a Cajun place in town.”

“Cajun? I don’t think I’ve had authentic Cajun food before,” Castiel told Dean excitedly.

“No? Well, tell ya what, you agree to a second date and that’s where I’ll take you.” 

“OK.”

“OK?” Dean asked. “You’re agreeing to a second date when we haven’t even finished the first one?”

Castiel laughed. “I don’t think there’s anything you could do to ruin this date and make me say no to a second.” He paused, a playful smile on his lips. “Unless you turn out to be a horrible kisser,” he teased.

Dean grinned back at him. “Is that permission to kiss you goodnight, Cas?”

Castiel could feel his blush heating his cheeks. “I wouldn’t be opposed.”

“Well, shit. I kinda want to skip to that part now.” Dean waggled his eyebrows playfully. 

“Not a chance. This food is too good to waste.”

Dean laughed as he scraped up the last of his lasagna. “You haven’t even seen what’s for dessert yet.”

“I don’t need to see it, Dean. I can smell it. And there’s no way I’m passing up pie.”

“Man after my own heart, Cas.” Dean stood, collecting their plates and putting them in a bin on the bottom rack of the cart before pulling out the pie. He set it on top of the cart before pulling out two clean plates, placing them on the table. He grabbed a knife and served up two portions of pie. 

Castiel took a bite. “Mmm, it tastes much better when I don’t have to get soaked to earn it.”

Dean had the good grace to look embarrassed. “Still haven’t forgotten about that, huh?”

“I told you, Dean. I will get my revenge.”

Dean sucked in a breath. “Jesus, you’re fucking hot when you go all Dom Cas on me.”

Castiel just raised a brow, watching in amusement as Dean licked his lips. “You think it’s hot yet you get all flustered when I mention cuffs or gags. How interesting.”

“OK!” Dean interrupted, cheeks pink. “New topic! Uhh…you guys are gonna be here for Thanksgiving, yeah? I know it’s like a month away, but never too early to plan!”

Castiel laughed at Dean’s awkward topic change. “That was the plan, yes. Though there’s not much point in doing the whole turkey thing when it’s just Claire and me.”

Dean paused in raising his last forkful of pie to his mouth. “What are you talking about? You guys are gonna celebrate with us.”

“Oh, Dean, I don’t want to intrude. It’s a family holiday.”

It was Dean’s turn to raise an eyebrow (and Castiel had to admit, it was hot). “Dude, I told you before. You’re stuck with us. You really need to meet Bobby. He’s always saying,” Dean dropped his voice, making it rough sounding, “‘Family don’t end in blood.’ And he’s right. Family is who you choose. And me and Sammy and Eileen? We choose you and Claire.” He ate his last bit of pie, chewing thoughtfully, before continuing. “We go all out for Thanksgiving. Bobby and Ellen and Jo come over. Charlie and Benny and Benny’s wife, Andrea. Hell, sometimes even Lisa and Ben show up. So, you know, you’re more than welcome.”

Castiel smiled, wondering how on earth he’d been lucky enough to meet someone like Dean - someone who was as beautiful on the inside as he was on the outside. “Well, if you insist, Mr. Winchester.”

“I do,” Dean told him honestly. “Now, come on. It’s time for Phase Two of our date.” He stood and reached behind the serving tray, grabbing his phone. 

The soft music that had been playing stopped, and Castiel suddenly realized it had been playing through bluetooth speakers from Dean’s phone. “What’s Phase Two?”

Dean grabbed his hand, pulling him from his seat and out of the tent as a new song began to play. Castiel glanced around, taking in the evening sky, brightly lit from the full moon. He looked back to Dean as recognized the beginning of Aerosmith’s Don’t Wanna Miss a Thing playing.

Dean turned to face him. “Dance with me?”

Castiel’s breath caught in his throat as he took Dean in. The full moon formed a halo around him while the last light of the sun cast golden light across his cheeks, highlighting his freckles and his dancing green eyes. “OK,” he whispered.

Dean pulled him close, wrapping his strong arms around Castiel’s shoulders while his own hands settled at Dean’s waist, hesitant, but oh so wanting. “This OK?” Dean asked softly.

“I haven’t danced with anyone since my wedding,” Castiel confessed, letting Dean lead him in slow, swaying movements. He couldn’t drag his eyes away from Dean’s. “I forgot how nice it is.”

Dean hummed. “It’s really only nice when it’s with the right person,” he mused. 

“Then it’s a good thing I’m here with you.”

Dean smiled shyly before glancing away, biting his lip. He turned back but didn’t quite meet Castiel’s eyes. “Do you think…” he started before trailing off. He was quiet for a moment, and Castiel waited him out, watching as he stared at a point over Castiel’s shoulder. Finally, he dragged his eyes back to meet Castiel’s. “Do you think this can work? Us, I mean?”

“You’re worried about what will happen when we go back to New York.” It wasn’t a question. Castiel knew that’s what Dean was thinking. Dean nodded, biting at his lower lip again. “How about,” Castiel started, reaching up and freeing Dean’s lip with his thumb, “we worry about that later, and just enjoy the present?” He soothed his thumb over Dean’s lip. “I like you, Dean. That’s all that matters to me right now.”

“I like you, too,” Dean breathed, as Castiel let his hand move to cup Dean’s face. Dean leaned into his touch, eyes searching Castiel’s. “Cas…”

Castiel moved his hand to the back of Dean’s head, letting his fingers brush through the soft strands before gently pulling Dean closer. Dean’s eyes fluttered shut and Castiel’s followed suit. Their lips met gently, holding for a moment before Dean sighed and pressed closer, his hands clutching the back of Castiel’s shirt. Castiel hummed a happy sound, tilting Dean’s head just so and parting his lips. Dean’s tongue darted forward, swiping gently over Castiel’s bottom lip before prodding into his mouth, meeting Castiel’s in a lazy dance, tasting and exploring. 

It was the best first kiss of Castiel’s life.

They broke away, eventually, to breathe, and Castiel opened his eyes to see a soft smile on Dean’s face. Castiel licked his lips, savoring the taste of Dean on them. “You’re definitely getting a second date.” Dean laughed, loudly and happily, before diving back in for a second kiss. It was less exploratory, more demanding, and Castiel felt his blood heating. “We should pack everything away,” he started, trying to pull away from Dean, “maybe move this indoors.”

“Screw cleaning up,” Dean mumbled, pulling Castiel close again and mouthing along his jaw, down his neck, his stubble setting Castiel’s skin on fire. “But I like the idea of moving this inside.”

“The horses,” Castiel tried. “What if they wreck something?”

Dean was already on the move, his hand gripping Castiel’s as he pulled him towards the cabin. “Horses’ll be fine. We roped the area off. Come on.”

They stumbled towards the barn, giggling like teenagers, exchanging shy looks that soon turned hungry. They were halfway down the barn aisle when Castiel stopped, tugging Dean back and turning him, slamming him into a stall door. Dean huffed out a laugh, eyes dark. “Fuck that’s hot.”

Castiel stepped closer. “You like being manhandled, Dean?” He wedged his thigh between Dean’s legs, leaning in until he felt the press of Dean’s growing erection. “You like knowing I could hold you down, make you submit to me?”

Dean groaned as he rolled his hips, seeking friction. “Wouldn’t have to make me, Cas,” he moaned as Castiel scraped his teeth over Dean’s pulse point. 

Castiel hummed, pulling back. “I’ll keep that in mind.” He grabbed Dean’s hand again and pulled him down the aisle and out of the barn. 

In minutes they were crashing through the cabin door, Dean barely having time to kick it closed before Castiel was shoving him back against it. Their lips met, hands groping and pulling. Castiel tugged Dean’s shirt free from his jeans and finally was able to smooth his hands across Dean’s skin. Castiel could feel the hard muscles under the warm, smooth skin and he ached for more. He slid his hands around Dean’s waist, thumbs stroking just under the waistband of his jeans. 

He turned Dean and started walking him backwards towards the bedroom. 

Their lips barely broke apart as they moved, Dean’s hands coming up to unbutton Castiel’s vest before sliding it off his shoulders and beginning work on his tie. Castiel began his own work on Dean’s shirt, and soon both men were shirtless. Castiel broke the kiss to take Dean in. 

And god, what a sight he was. He was toned, except for a little bit of a stomach that Castiel knew was from Dean’s sweet tooth. His skin was golden, highlighted with freckles. Castiel wanted to taste and map each one. “You’re beautiful,” he breathed.

Dean blushed, and Castiel was amused to see it spread down his chest. “You’re pretty fucking hot, too, Cas.”

Castiel grinned and crowded back in, forcing Dean back until his legs hit the mattress and he fell to the bed. Somewhere along the way, he’d kicked his boots off, so Castiel kicked his own shoes off and crawled on top of him. “Tell me what you want, Dean.”

“Anything,” Dean breathed as Castiel kissed a trail down his neck. “Thought of this so many times, Cas. Anything you give me, I’ll take.”

Castiel sat up at that. “Tell me,” he demanded.

“ What?! ” Dean squeaked. 

“Tell me what you were thinking.”

“ Cas… ”

Castiel reached a hand down and circled one of Dean’s nipples with his thumb. “Did you touch yourself while thinking about me?” Dean blushed but nodded. Castiel rewarded him by pinching his nipple lightly. Dean moaned. “Tell me, Dean.”

Dean stared up at him, eyes wild. He licked his lips. “Thought about kissing you.” Castiel leaned down and took his nipple in his mouth. “Thought about touching you. You touching me.” He groaned as Castiel sucked lightly on his nipple. “Thought, oh fuck, ” he swore as Castiel lowered his hips and let their hard cocks rub together through their jeans. “Thought about tasting you. Being on my knees for you.” He got distracted as he rolled his hips into Castiel’s.

“Did you think about me fucking you?” Castiel moved his mouth back upwards, sucking gentle marks into the skin of Dean’s throat. He felt Dean nod. “ Tell me. ”

“I used a toy,” Dean whispered. “Pretended it was you. Came so hard.”

It was Castiel’s turn to groan as he slammed his lips back onto Dean’s. He felt Dean’s hands skimming down his back before making their way to the front of Castiel’s jeans, working desperately at the button. Castiel wrenched himself away, sitting up and working his jeans open while Dean did his own. Castiel stood for a moment, shucking his jeans and boxers, noticing Dean’s hands pause as he took Castiel in. He grinned. “Need some help?”

Dean huffed a laugh and finished undoing his jeans. He lifted his hips when Castiel tugged at the legs, pulling them off in one swift motion. Dean quickly shuffled out of his boxers, then held his arms open. “Get back here.”

It was an order Castiel was more than eager to obey. He climbed back over Dean, ducking down for a filthy kiss as he finally, finally , let their erections brush together. Castiel could barely concentrate on anything other than the hot, velvet glide of Dean’s cock against his own, Dean’s hands clutching at his back, his hair, Dean’s mouth hot against his own. When the dry pull of their cocks became almost too much, Castiel reached over to the night table, fumbling in the drawer until he found the bottle of lube. He managed to pour some in his hand without breaking their kiss, and then he was reaching between them, taking both of them in hand. 

Dean groaned, a filthy sound that had Castiel’s blood boiling, and then Dean was reaching between them, completing the circle. Castiel pulled away from his lips to look down at where their cocks shoved in and out of their fists. “Cas,” Dean choked out, and when Castiel glanced up, he saw Dean, too, was staring at their dicks, his eyes hooded and dark. “I’m not gonna… fuck , not gonna last long, Cas.”

Castiel leaned back down and started kissing along Dean’s jaw, scraping his teeth over his pulse point, sucking bruises along his shoulder. “Come for me, Dean,” he commanded, punctuated by a particularly hard nip to Dean’s collar bone. Dean tensed beneath him, and Castiel sat back to watch him fall apart. His eyes were squeezed shut, his breathing erratic, chest flushed, and then, with a shout, he spilled over their hands, his own hand going slack around them. Castiel worked him through it, murmuring soft words. “So beautiful. So good for me, Dean.” He followed his words with soft kisses. 

After a few minutes, Dean’s eyes fluttered open, a lazy smile on his face. Glancing down and seeing that Castiel was still lazily stroking his hard cock, Dean reached back and grabbed two handfuls of Castiel’s ass, dragging him up his body until Castiel was straddling his stomach. “Come on me, Cas,” he breathed, a plea, a command, a prayer. Dean’s eyes stayed fixed on his cock as Castiel started stroking faster, harder, adding a little twist every second or third stroke, Dean’s strong hands clutching at his thighs. “So hot, Cas. Gonna come all over me? Mark me? Come on, sweetheart.”

Castiel wasn’t sure if it was the dirty talk or the term of endearment that did him in, but with a groan he was coming hard. It took all his willpower to keep his eyes open to see his cum mark Dean, landing hot and sticky on his chest. His eyes widened as Dean ran a finger through the mess before glancing up. “You clean?”

Castiel’s brain was misfiring, so all he could do was nod breathlessly and watch as Dean sucked the cum off his finger. He leaned down and kissed Dean, chasing the taste of himself. He hummed as he pulled away, rolling onto his side next to Dean. Dean rolled to face him, their breaths mingling as their heart rates slowed. Dean reached out and cupped Castiel’s face, drawing him into a sweet kiss. “Cas?” he murmured when he pulled away. Castiel hummed in acknowledgement. “I’m sticky.”

Castiel barked an amused laugh and leaned back in to kiss the pout off Dean’s lips. “Alright, hang on,” he said, dragging himself out of bed and to the bathroom. He grabbed a washcloth and quickly cleaned himself before grabbing a fresh one and returning to Dean. Dean rolled onto his back and let Castiel gently clean him off. When he was done, he tossed the washcloth towards the hamper and climbed back in next to Dean, pulling him into his arms. Dean rested his head on Castiel’s chest, slinging an arm over his waist. 

They were quiet for a few minutes, content in just being close, but eventually the buzzing of one of their phones broke the silence. Dean groaned as he sat up, reaching over the side of the bed for his jeans. “It’s mine,” he said when he found his phone. “Sam says Claire is getting sleepy.”

Castiel sighed as he sat up and wrapped his arms around Dean from behind, resting his chin on his shoulder. “Guess I should go get her.”

Dean turned and kissed his cheek. “Nah, I’ll go get her. No point in both of us getting dressed.” He stood and began pulling his clothes back on and Castiel followed, pulling on some sweatpants and a t-shirt before following Dean to the door. “Alright, I’ll be right back with one little girl and one man wanting a goodnight kiss.”

Castiel grinned. “I’ll be waiting.”

Chapter Text

October came to an end, going out with a bang as Dean insisted everyone dress up to take Claire out trick or treating. He’d gone into the city one afternoon and come home with costumes for everyone. Dean, of course, was Batman, and Cas, with his raven hair and cobalt eyes was picture perfect as Superman. Sam and Eileen paired up as Hawkman and Hawkgirl. Which left Claire as the cutest little Wonder Woman Dean had ever seen. Claire’s initial nervousness faded away as house after house cooed over how cute she was, filling her bag with more candy than one child could ever eat. She spent an hour afterwards sorting through her loot, separating everything into piles from her most favorite to least favorite, before happily divvying up the least favorite pile between the adults.

When she finally passed out on the couch, Cas carried her to the guest room, tucking her in, before sneaking back to the cabin with Dean, where Dean let him manhandle him all he wanted. Because, hey, Batman is human and Superman has powers , so he was just acting out the part. And if that part meant turning into a crying, begging mess as Cas sucked his cock, well. Dean wasn’t gonna complain. 

Yeah, Halloween was a good night.

November brought cooler days and colder nights. The shortening days had the horses growing out their winter coats, making them soft and fuzzy. Applejack had been accepted into the herd, Lucy, the boss mare, taking her under her proverbial wing and preventing any of the other horses from bothering her. Dean watched the foal frolicking in the pasture before heading back into the barn to finish the chores. Claire had disappeared into town with Eileen, and Dean was eager to finish and track Cas down.

He’d just finished the last stall when he heard Cas’ footsteps coming towards him. As Cas passed the stall, Dean reached out and grabbed him from behind, pulling him back into the stall, turning him and pressing him against the wall. 

“Hello, Dean.”

“Heya, Cas,” Dean replied, before kissing him stupid. He pulled away and Cas tilted his head as Dean began sucking marks on his neck, hands untucking Cas’ shirt and skimming over his skin. He was so warm compared to the chilly day. 

“You seem to be in a very affectionate mood,” Cas chuckled.

“Mmm, not affectionate,” Dean’s hands made their way to the front of Cas’ jeans and began working on undoing them. “‘M horny.”

Cas gasped as Dean’s hand wormed its way into his boxers, closing around hiss chubbing dick. He began stroking it as his lips continued to nip and suck at Cas’ neck. When Cas was almost fully hard, Dean dropped to his knees, looking up at Cas through his eyelashes. Cas looked dazed already. Dean grinned. “Fuck my face, Cas.”

“ Here?! ”

“Mmhmm…they don’t call it a roll in the hay for nothing.”

“Jesus Christ,” Cas muttered, but his hands were already reaching for Dean, one hand working its way into Dean’s hair, the other cupping his cheek, thumb softly stroking over his bottom lip. “Open.”

Dean obeyed, relaxing his jaw and letting his mouth fall open. Cas slowly pushed his thumb in, letting it trace over Dean’s tongue. Dean wanted to close his lips and tease it, but Cas hadn’t said he could, and one thing Dean was quickly learning was how much he got off on Cas being in charge.

“Eyes, Dean.”

He hadn’t even realized he’d closed them, but his eyes immediately snapped up to Cas’. Cas smirked and Dean knew the bastard knew what kind of effect he had on Dean. “Good boy.”

Dean felt his face flush at the praise, but he didn’t spare it much thought as Cas was removing his thumb, slowly letting it drag over Dean’s bottom lip. And then, finally , Cas was drawing him in by the hand in his hair, slowly feeding his cock past Dean’s lips, hot velvet sliding over his tongue and into his throat. Cas bottomed out and held him there, his breath ragged. Dean could feel his eyes watering and his mind going fuzzy with the lack of air, but he pushed past the panic, knowing Cas wouldn’t hurt him. And he was right. Just when he thought he wouldn’t last another second, Cas pulled back and let him drag in a breath. 

It was the only respite he got. Cas began fucking into his mouth in ernest. Dean tried to keep up, sealing his lips tight, sucking when he could, twisting his tongue around Cas’ cock when he had the chance, but for the most part, he let Cas use him. Let himself just be a warm, wet hole for Cas. And he loved every second of it. 

Cas must have too, if his chants of “Fuck, so good” and “So perfect, Dean” were anything to go by. Dean held off as long as he could, but eventually his hands were scrambling for the zipper of his own jeans, pulling out his rock hard and weeping cock. The sight only seemed to spur Cas on. “You gonna come, Dean? You getting off on me using you like this?” He snapped his hips harder into Dean’s mouth. “Getting off on sucking my cock? You look so pretty with your lips stretched around me. Gonna film you one day, show you how perfect you are.”

Dean’s entire body caught fire at the thought of Cas wanting to film him, the fear and excitement pulling a whine from within. He stripped his cock hard and fast. 

“You want that, Dean? Wanna see how pretty you look with my cock in your mouth?” And Dean did . He wanted . He hummed an affirmative sound, and the vibrations that sent down Cas’ dick had him coming with a shout, shoving his cock deep down Dean’s throat. The taste and feel of Cas’ cum had Dean spilling his own load into the dirt at his feet. 

He pulled off Cas’ cock, leaning his head against his thigh, chest heaving. He felt Cas’ fingers loosen in his hair before softly stroking through the strands. When he’d caught his breath, he wiped his face on his sleeve and glanced up at Cas. Cas, beautiful, gorgeous, Cas. Cas with his dazed, sated smile, still stroking gently through Dean’s hair. Dean returned his smile lazily, carefully tucking Cas back into his pants before sitting back on his heels to tuck himself back in. Cas slid down the stall wall, relaxing into the clean straw, and Dean took the opportunity to straddle his lap, his hands gently cupping Cas’ face as he leaned in for a soft kiss. Cas’ hands landed at Dean’s waist, holding him close. Dean pulled back from the kiss, thumbs stroking Cas’ cheek as his eyes fluttered open. “Hey.” And Jesus, even Dean could hear how rough his voice was. 

Cas noticed, one hand coming up to slide across Dean’s throat. “Too rough?”

Dean shook his head. “Was perfect.” Cas’ hand slid back down to his waist, both of them slipping under Dean’s shirt to rub circles into his skin. “You’re really fucking good at dirty talk, Cas.”

Cas huffed a laugh. “I’m glad you think so. I don’t think I know what I’m saying half the time.”

Dean hummed. “We could try that sometime. Umm…the filming? Or pictures?” He could feel the heat rising in his cheeks. “If you want…”

“Would you want that?”

 Dean nodded. “I trust you. And it sounded really fucking hot.”

Cas laughed again. “Alright, I’ll add it to the list. Come one, we should make ourselves decent before the girls get back.”

Dean nodded and got to his feet, helping Cas up. It wasn’t until Cas was halfway back to his cabin that Dean realized what he’d said. 

“There’s a list?!? ”

Cas’ only response was his laughter.

“OK, sweetpea, you be good for Sam and Eileen, OK?” 

I will, Papa.

“Alright, let’s go find them.”

It was the day before Thanksgiving and Castiel had just finished bundling Claire up so Eileen and Sam could take her into town to the annual Thanksgiving fair. Eileen had suggested, with a suggestive eyebrow waggle, that the three of them head in early so he and Dean could have some alone time before joining them. Castiel had felt his face flushing but found himself agreeing anyway. 

He walked with Claire towards where Sam, Eileen and Bones were already waiting in Castiel’s SUV. He’d insisted they take it, saying it was easier for them to just drive his car instead of switching Claire’s booster seat back and forth. Sam had spread a blanket over the back seat for Bones and Castiel gave him a pat after strapping Claire in. When Claire had found out that the fair allowed dogs she had insisted that Bones had to go because he’s part of the family , and, as per usual, no one could say no to Claire.

“Alright, guys, we’ll see you in a few hours.” Castiel felt strong arms wrap around him from behind and leaned back into Dean’s warmth. “Claire has promised to behave, but you have my number if you need it.”

“Don’t eat too much before going on the rides, Little Bear! Don’t want you puking everywhere!” Dean helpfully suggested. Claire pulled a disgusted face while Dean laughed. “Alright, guys, see you in a bit.”

They waved as the car drove off, and then Castiel turned in Dean’s arms, leaning up the few inches it took to meet Dean’s lips. Dean kissed him back for a minute, before pulling away with a groan. “I have to go check the cattle. Chevy’s already tacked up. Give me 40 minutes and I’m all yours.”

“You better make my wait worth it, Winchester.”

Dean kissed him again, hot and dirty and over way too quickly. “You bet your ass I will.”

Castiel hummed. “Didn’t think it was my ass on the line,” he teased. 

Dean grinned. “Now you’re talking. I’ll be back soon.” He pecked Castiel’s cheek and strode over to where Chevy was tied by the gate, swinging on to his back with ease. He gave a wave and then they were off. 

Castiel watched them go before heading back to the cabin, shivering against the wind that was starting to pick up. He’d have to take an extra sweater for Claire when they left, just to make sure she was warm enough. 

He settled on the couch with his laptop, working away on the final chapter of his novel. He lost track of time as he worked on rounding out the story, and it seemed like it was only moments later when Dean was bursting through the door. 

Castiel looked up, eyes widening as he took in Dean’s drenched form. He hadn’t even noticed it had started raining. He hurried off the couch to get some towels. “How long has it been raining?”

“Just a few minutes,” Dean replied, taking a towel and scrubbing it over his hair. “Take it you were lost in your work again?”

Castiel nodded, peering out the window. The sky to the south looked dark, but to the north, towards town, it still looked nice and sunny. “Will they close the fair?”

Dean shrugged. “Not for a little rain. Didn’t hear any thunder, so as long as there’s no lightning, they’ll keep it open.” He shrugged out of his flannel overshirt before looking out the window towards town. “Looks pretty nice that way, so they should be OK. I left the meadow gate open for the horses, just in case it gets bad.” 

Castiel nodded. “Well, then, looks like the only thing left to do is get you out of those wet clothes.”

“You’re a smart man, Mr. Novak.”

Castiel grinned, hands reaching for the hem of Dean’s shirt. Dean lifted his arms over his head, allowing Castiel to pull his shirt up and off. Dean shivered as Castiel’s hands skimmed over his skin. “Are you cold?”

“Starting to warm up.”

“Hmmm, maybe you need a nice, hot shower.”

Dean licked his lips. “You gonna join me?”

“Obviously.”

Dean huffed and Castiel grabbed his hand, leading him towards the bathroom. He made fast work of Dean’s jeans, even faster work of his own clothing, and then they were both under the steaming water, Dean pressed up against the tiles, Castiel’s lips tasting every bit of skin he could find. He could feel Dean’s erection pressing against his thigh, so he kissed his way lower before dropping to his knees in front of Dean. He licked a long stripe up the underside of Dean’s cock, swirling his tongue around the head and lapping up the precum that was beading there. Dean moaned and before the sound had faded, Castiel took him into his mouth. Dean was hard and hot, velvety and smooth, and Castiel worked him over with his lips, his tongue, sucking and licking, adding a gentle graze of teeth every so often, just the way Dean loved. He reached behind Dean to where a bottle of lube perched on the side of the bath, opening it and drizzling some on his fingers without losing his rhythm. He reached behind Dean and ran his lubed finger over his hole. They hadn’t gone this far yet, but he had a feeling Dean wouldn’t object.

He was right. Dean let out the filthiest groan, bucking forward into Castiel’s mouth before pressing back against his finger. “Cas, Cas, please…” he begged.

Castiel was only too happy to oblige. He slipped a finger in, slowly, teasingly, pushing it in and out to the same rhythm he sucked Dean’s dick. Dean was panting, getting closer to the edge, and one little crook of Castiel’s finger, right over that little bundle of nerves, had Dean slamming his arms against the tile for purchase as he bucked harshly forward, coming down Castiel’s throat. Castiel worked him through the orgasm before letting him slip from his lips. He stood slowly, one hand on the tile to keep from slipping, one wrapped around his own cock, stroking lazily while he waited for Dean to come back to him. 

A few minutes was all it took before Dean was fluttering his eyes open with a grin. “Your turn,” he said, dropping to his own knees in front of Castiel. But instead of leaning in to suck him off, Dean peered up at him. He licked his lips nervously. “Umm, I have a request?” Castiel nodded, already knowing he’d agree to pretty much anything Dean asked. “I wanna watch you jerk off. And uh, I want you to comeonmyface.” It came out as one jumbled word in his nervousness.

Castiel just grinned. “Anything you want, Dean.” Dean’s shoulders relaxed marginally, his eyes dropping to Castiel’s cock as he started stripping it faster. “Have you let anyone else do this before? Come on your face?”  Dean shook his head, cheeks flushed, eyes still staring raptly where Castiel’s cock appeared and disappeared into his fist. “I marked you the first time we were together, remember? Not your pretty face though. Gonna look so good covered in my cum. Hmmm should I try to aim? Maybe for your perfect cocksucking mouth?” He watched as Dean reflexively licked his lips. “Or maybe those perfect cheekbones of yours? Or no, those pretty long eyelashes!” And fuck, the vision that induced in Castiel’s mind had him hurling towards the edge. “Gonna come all over you, Dean. Make you mine.”

“‘M already yours,” Dean whispered and that was enough to tip Castiel over. He came with a shout, his free hand slapping against the tile over Dean’s head to support him while his other worked him through his orgasm. He fought to keep his eyes open, watching his cum land on Dean’s face. One streak did land in his eyelashes, forcing Dean’s eyes closed. Another landed on the bridge of his nose, sliding down to his lips where Dean’s tongue darted out to pull it into his mouth. One landed on his cheek and Castiel was quick to swipe it up with a finger before pushing the finger into Dean’s mouth. They both moaned. 

Castiel stepped back, out of the way of the spray, letting the water wash away the rest of his spunk. Dean blinked his eyes open, cheeks still flushed. “Was that OK?” he asked nervously. 

Castiel laughed incredulously. “More than. In fact, we are definitely doing that again, and it’s definitely something I’ll be taking a picture of.” He helped Dean to his feet, crowding in close. “You have no idea how fucking hot that was,” he whispered against Dean’s lips before kissing him. Dean hummed happily and they made out lazily for a while, just kissing and touching for the sake of it. Eventually the water started cooling off and they made their way out of the shower drying. They dried off quickly before Castiel pulled Dean into the bedroom. 

“Round two already?” Dean teased, flopping inelegantly on his back on the bed. 

Castiel snorted, opening the closet and pulling out two pairs of sweatpants and two t-shirts. “No,” he replied, tossing one pair of clothes at Dean before pulling on the other set. “It’s time for coffee and cuddles.” 

“We can’t have naked cuddles?” Dean asked.

Castiel turned to see him holding the clothes, making no move to get dressed, a pout on his lips. He walked over to the bed and straddled Dean’s lap, leaning down to kiss him sweetly. “No.”

He moved to get up but Dean held him close, strong arms wrapped around his waist. “Aww come on, Cas!”

“Dean, if you don’t get dressed now, you never will.”

“Really not seeing the problem here, Cas.”

Castiel chuckled before kissing him again. Before he could come up with an answer, Dean’s phone rang, echoing down the hallway from where it was still lost in the pile of clothes in the bathroom. “Saved by the bell,” he grinned, dislodging himself from Dean’s lap. He rushed to the bathroom, finding Dean’s phone, which had stopped ringing by then, and tossing it to him from the bedroom doorway. “It was Sam. Call him back. Get dressed. I’ll start the coffee.” 

He left Dean to return Sam’s call. He wasn’t worried, knowing if there was a problem with Claire Sam would have called him directly. Sam was probably just wondering where they should meet up and when.

Castiel made his way into the kitchen, listening to the rain pound on the roof. It had picked up while they’d been in the shower, and he could hear the wind howling. He glanced out the window and froze.

He heard Dean come in behind him, saying something about Sam. He didn’t hear a word. “Dean.”

Dean kept on as though he hadn’t heard, muttering about what a worrywart Sam was as he pulled on his shirt. “ Dean. ”

Dean finally seemed to notice the state he was in. “Cas? What’s wrong?”

“Dean, the sky.” He turned, fear making his breath catch. “It’s green.”

Chapter Text

“No, Sam, I’m sure it’ll be fine. Just hole up at Bobby’s for a bit. I’m sure it’ll pass….Yeah, the horses are already in the meadow….No, stay put. If it’s as bad as you think it is, I don’t want you guys out in it….I know , Sam….How’s Claire?.....No, we’re not adopting a kitten!....No, Sam, no kittens!....OK, I’m hanging up now….Bye.”

Dean ended the call with a roll of his eyes. How Sam had turned out to be such a nervous nelly was beyond him. Sure, their history with storms wasn’t great, but geez. Dean pulled on his borrowed sweatpants and grabbed the shirt Cas had thrown at him and wandered out to the kitchen. “Sam says they closed the fair ‘cause of the storm. Said it’s not even raining there yet but they think it’ll roll in soon so they sent everyone home.”  He pulled his shirt over his head as he continued. “Sam, of course, is freaking out. They’re already at Bobby’s. Told him to stay in town just in case it does get bad. Claire’s fine. Bobby’s got a bunch of orphan kittens at his place so Claire’s apparently in heaven. Sam already wants to adopt one.”

“ Dean. ”

Dean finally looked over at Cas, noticing the tone of his voice and realizing it probably wasn’t the first time he’d called his name. “Cas? What’s wrong?”

“Dean, the sky.” Cas turned towards him, terror clear on his face. “It’s green.”

Dean’s heart dropped to his stomach as he rushed to the window. His heart stuttered as he peered out, eyes drawn beyond the sickly green sky to the wall cloud forming in the distance, hanging low underneath the storm clouds. A flash of lightning lit up the sky for a fraction of a second but it was enough for Dean to see the wall cloud was rotating. He stood frozen for a moment before all his senses seemed to kick into overdrive at once. “We have to go.”

He turned, grabbing Cas’ hand and pulling him towards where their boots lay discarded in the living room. He shoved his bare feet into his cowboy boots, turning to see Cas standing frozen. “Sweetheart?” His hands came up to cup Cas’ face, forcing him to meet his eyes. “I need you to put your boots on, OK? I promise I’ll take care of you. You trust me, right?”

Cas nodded, licking his lips. “Claire…”

Dean cut him off. “Claire’s fine. She’s safe with Sam and Eileen at Bobby’s. We’re gonna get to the storm cellar and you can call her, OK? The faster we get there, the sooner you’ll see she’s OK.”

Cas nodded again, sitting down on the couch to pull his boots on. He’d just stood up again when an ear piercing alarm sounded from Dean’s phone. Dean’s hands shook as he read the alert.

EMERGENCY ALERT
National Weather Service: TORNADO WARNING in Lyon County until 10:00 PM CST.
Take immediate shelter in a basement or an interior room on the lowest floor of a sturdy building. If you are outdoors, in a mobile home, or in a vehicle, move to the closest substantial shelter and protect yourself from flying debris.
Monitor media for updates.

“Shit.”  He glanced at Cas who had come closer to read the alert. “OK, grab a garbage bag. I’ll be right back.” 

Dean ran back to the bedroom, grabbing two of everything - sweatpants, boxers, shirts, sweaters and socks. He rushed back out to the living room where Cas was holding the garbage bag with a bewildered look on his face. “We’re gonna get soaked out there,” he explained. “Figured dry clothes might be nice while we ride this out.”

Cas nodded thoughtfully. “Pity. I was looking forward to huddling naked for body heat.”

Dean barked a laugh, thankful in the knowledge that Cas seemed to have snapped out of his terror. He grabbed Cas’ hand and turned for the door. “Come on.”

The wind caught the door as soon as he opened it, tearing it out of his hand and slamming it back against the wall. The sky seemed to be growing darker by the minute but he refused to look in the direction of the storm, scared to death of what he’d see. He turned to Cas. “Ready?”

At Cas’ nod, Dean ran out into the storm, heading for the side of the house where the entrance to the storm cellar was. They were halfway there when a sound made him pause. He stopped, looking around, trying to pinpoint what he’d heard.

“Dean?”

He heard it again and turned towards the barn. Now that he knew what it was, it was easy to make out Cartman’s terrified screams coming from the barn. The wind had slammed the door shut and he was trapped. He turned to Cas, shoving the bag of clothes into his arms. “Go! I’ve gotta get the damn goat!” He had to raise his voice to be heard over the wind.

“Dean, no! There’s no time!”

“I’ll be right behind you! I promise!” He pulled Cas into a hurried, frantic kiss. “Now go!”

He made sure Cas was on his way before turning and sprinting to the barn. The wind whipped around him, swirling the dirt up, throwing branches into his path. Something glanced off the side of his head, but he paid it no mind, focused on getting to the barn as fast as he could. He pried the door open enough to slip in, not wanting to risk Cartman running out. The lights overhead flickered.

“CARTMAN!” he bellowed, loud enough to be heard over the storm. And for once in his goddamn life, Cartman actually heeded his call, bolting out of the tack room and straight towards him. Dean picked him up, not trusting him to actually follow, and not having time to halter and try and lead him. He braced against the door, shoving it open enough to squeeze back through. He took a deep breath.

And he ran.

He was halfway to the storm cellar when he heard what sounded like a freight train barreling towards him. Lightning lit up the sky, and Dean’s worst nightmare was lit up with it. 

The tornado was heading right for them.

Dean stared, panic rising, unable to think, unable to move, until Cas’ frantic shouts made their way through his terror. “Dean!!”  Dean turned back towards the storm cellar where Cas had got the doors open and was beckoning him. Dean started moving again, the sound of the storm seeming to get louder with every breath he took. 

He passed off Cartman to Cas when he made it there. “Take him down! I’ll close the doors!” Cas nodded and made his way down the stairs, his phone’s flashlight app lighting the way. Dean managed to get the doors closed, barring them with a thick wooden beam, and headed down the stairs. It was quieter down here, underground, and he took a moment to appreciate the silence.

“Meh-eh-eh.”

Dean huffed a laugh and began turning on the battery operated lights that hung from the ceiling. “Dammit, Cartman, you’re gonna be the death of me one of these days.”  He turned to Cas. “You OK?”

“I mean, other than being utterly terrified, I seem to be OK.”

Dean pulled him into a hug and kissed his cheek, letting go when Cas’ phone started ringing. He peered over Cas’ shoulder as he answered Sam’s video call. “Hello, Sam.”

“Cas! Are you guys OK?!”

“Yes, we’re fine. We’re in the storm cellar. With Cartman.”

Sam breathed out a relieved laugh. “Claire heard the alerts on our phones and is a bit freaked out. Eileen’s with her in the other room, trying to calm her down. I didn’t want her to know I was calling in case I didn’t get through. Figured that would scare her more.”

“Well, she’s not the only one who’s freaked out. Sam, there’s a tornado to the south of us.”

Dean could see Sam tense and spoke up. “We’ll be fine, Sam. We’re in the bunker. Hell, you helped me build it, you know how safe it is.”

“I know. I saw the alert and I guess I was hoping it wasn’t that close.”

Dean made the executive decision to not tell Sam the twister was heading right for them. There was no point in worrying his brother more than he already was. “Well, if worse comes to worse and we’re trapped down here, at least we’ll have fresh goat meat to live off of.”

Cas rolled his eyes and Sam bit back a laugh, so Dean figured his job of relieving the tension was done. “Alright, put Claire on. But keep it short. Don’t want the cell towers to go down in the middle of the call and scare her more.” He turned to Cas. “I’m gonna go dry Cartman off a bit.”

Cas nodded and Dean wandered off to the back of the cellar where shelves held bins full of emergency supplies. He pulled out a bin marked towels and another marked blankets and dragged them into one of the side rooms. 

When he and Sam had started the dude ranch, they’d both agreed that keeping their guests safe was the top priority, and that included being able to shelter up to thirty people in the event of a tornado. What they called the storm cellar with most people, they jokingly referred to as the bunker. And it kinda was. The main area stored enough food and water to last dozens of people days, if necessary, and there were eight rooms branching off the main area that could be used as bedrooms. Add in some self-inflating air mattresses in each room and they were set.

What they weren’t set up for were goats, so Dean set about making a nest of blankets for Cartman before dragging the goat into the room and drying him off with some towels. He settled into the nest with Cartman beside him and pulled out his phone, clicking on his camera app, taking a selfie with Cartman. He sent it off to Sam to pass on to Claire.

“Alright, buddy,” he said softly to Cartman, who was starting to doze off, “you hang out here for a bit. I gotta go take care of Cas.”

He scratched Cartman behind his ears before standing and making his way into one of the other bedrooms where he set about inflating one of the mattresses and piling it with more blankets, folding a few to use as pillows. He had just finished when Cas came in, holding the bag of clothes and some more towels. “Claire OK?”

Cas nodded. “Scared, but the kittens seem to be distracting her well enough. And she’s pretty jealous that we’re having a ‘sleepover with Cartman.’”  He dumped the clothes on the mattress and handed Dean a towel. “Dean! You’re bleeding!” He reached up to prod at Dean’s head.

Now that Cas had pointed it out, Dean became aware of the tacky blood on his face.

The blood dripped onto his face. Dripping slowly down his cheek, following the tear tracks. It was sticky and he wanted to wipe it away, but he couldn’t move, his arms trapped, his whole body trapped. He couldn’t even turn his head and every time he opened his eyes, dead eyes stared back…

“Dean! Come on, baby, come back to me. Just breathe, Dean.”

Dean slowly became aware of Cas talking to him. His chest hurt as he tried to heave in a breath. He felt like he’d been underwater for days.

“There you go. It’s OK. I’m right here. You’re OK.”

He was sitting on the mattress, Cas beside him, one hand holding his, the other rubbing his back. “Cas?”

“Dean,” Cas breathed, relief evident in his tone. “Just breathe for a minute. Don’t try to talk.”

Dean nodded and did his best to take even breaths. Slowly, his heart rate calmed down. He squeezed Cas’ hand. “Sorry.”

“Shhh, there’s nothing to apologize for. Was it a panic attack?” Dean nodded. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Dean opened his mouth but then shook his head. “Cas, I can’t.”

“Shhh, that’s OK. Let’s get that cut taken care of, OK? I saw a first aid kit out there. I’m going to go grab it but I’ll be right back, OK?” 

Dean nodded and Cas got up, hurrying out of the room. He was only gone a minute or so before he was rushing back in. He had the first aid kit and some bottles of water. “Here, drink some water. It’ll help.”

Dean did as he was told as Cas opened the first aid kit and got out some antiseptic wipes. He started cleaning up the blood that had dripped down Dean’s face before moving on to the cut itself, causing Dean to wince. “Ow.”

“Sorry.” Cas grimaced in sympathy but didn’t stop cleaning the cut. “It doesn’t look too deep. You’re lucky.” He tossed the wipes into a pile and stood. “Come on, we should get into dry clothes.” He pulled Dean to his feet and they both stripped down, drying themselves with the towels before slipping into the dry clothes. 

A sudden crash outside had Dean whipping around towards the stairs, his heart rate suddenly skyrocketing again. He could hear his breaths coming out harshly, unevenly. And then warm arms wrapped around him. “It’s OK,” Cas said softly, turning him in his arms. “It’s just the wind banging stuff around outside. We’re OK.”

Dean tried to relax but even underground he could hear the wind picking up, howling as the tornado got closer. The cellar doors started rattling as the wind tried to tear them away. He tensed, mind running a mile a minute. They weren’t going to make it. The storm was too strong, too close…

Warm lips were on his, soft and pliant, a wet tongue slipped into his mouth, tasting and searching. His thoughts narrowed down to Cas, the smell and taste and feel of him. Dean’s breath hitched as Cas pulled away to breathe. “Don’t stop,” Dean begged, eyes opening to find Cas’ tender gaze on him. “Please…”

And Cas, beautiful, perfect Cas, knew exactly what he needed. A distraction for his body so his mind wouldn’t get lost again. Cas nodded and reached for the hem of Dean’s shirt. “I guess getting dressed was a bit premature,” he said, pulling the shirt over Dean’s head.

“As long as that’s the only thing about this encounter that’s premature I’ll be fine,” Dean teased. 

Cas grinned at him and kissed him again, hands wandering over Dean’s chest, his shoulders, his back. Dean pulled Cas’ shirt up, breaking the kiss long enough to tug it off, then kissed him again, deeper, more urgently. Cas turned him, pushing him down on the air mattress with a bounce before dropping his sweatpants and climbing on top of him and kissing him again. Dean’s hands wound through Cas’ hair, following the movement as Cas began kissing his way down Dean’s neck to his chest. Dean gasped as Cas’ lips closed over his right nipple while his thumb grazed over the left one before pinching it between his thumb and finger. Dean moaned at the dual sensations - the soft swirl of Cas’ tongue on one nipple versus the tight, hot pinch on the other. Cas worked both into perky, erect nubs before continuing on his journey down Dean’s body, pausing only to pull Dean’s pants off.

Dean moaned as warm, wet heat enveloped his cock, Cas’ lips slick and sliding smoothly down his length. His hands tangled back into Cas’ hair, guiding him into a lazy rhythm up and down, his hips rolling gently upwards, pushing himself into Cas’ throat and back out, over and over. Cas hummed, the vibrations running up Dean’s length and causing goosebumps to break out across his skin. He gazed down, watching as he slid in and out of Cas’ swollen lips. He was close, so close, but he wanted more. He tugged at Cas’ hair, pulling him off, staring at the string of saliva that clung between Cas’ bottom lip and his cock until gravity caused the strand to break. A drop of precum was beading on his cockhead, and Cas leaned forward and lapped it up. “Cas…” 

Cas surged forward, kissing him roughly, lips and tongue tasting like Dean. Hands and lips were everywhere, their cocks brushing against each other, and Dean knew he could come, just like this, but it wasn’t what he wanted. He broke away, gasping. “Cas, want you to fuck me.”

Cas closed his eyes as though he was gathering strength. When he opened them, they were dark, full of desire and want. “We don’t have lube.”

Dean’s head flopped back on his makeshift pillow. “Sonofabitch!” He closed his eyes, running a hand through his hair, wincing when he grazed the fresh cut. His eyes snapped open as an idea formed. He wrapped his arms around Cas and rolled them so Cas was on his back, a bewildered look in his eyes. Dean just grinned, leaning over the side of the mattress and rummaging through the first aid kit until he found what he was looking for, holding it up for Cas to see.

“Vaseline?” Cas asked, leaning up on his elbows. “Why do you have Vaseline in your first aid kit?”

“Oh, man, it’s got all kinds of uses. Good for cuts and burns, prevents infection, moisturises. And,” he went on, waggling the container and his eyebrows, “it’s a lubricant.”  He frowned down at the container. “Kinda greasy though, but…” he shrugged, “I’m game if you are.”

Cas bucked his hips up, driving his cock along Dean’s ass crack. “I am definitely game.”

“Awesome.” Dean opened the container and scooped some Vaseline out, reaching behind him to slick up Cas’ cock. Cas moaned and rolled his hips into the touch and Dean indulged him for a minute before letting go and wiping his hand on one of the discarded towels. He sat up on his knees, reaching behind him to grab and steady Cas’ cock.

Cas’ hands grabbed his waist, pausing his movements. “No prep?”

Dean shook his head. “Don’t need it. Don’t like it much, to be honest. Like to feel full from the get go.” 

Cas’ brow wrinkled. “I fingered you in the shower earlier. You didn’t say anything.”

Dean hummed thoughtfully. “It’s different if you’re giving me a blow job and fingering me. Or if you wanted to use toys or your fingers to edge me. But this?” He paused, lowering himself slowly down onto Cas’ cock with a sigh. “Feels way better for me this way.”

Cas had his eyes squeezed shut, his face flush. His tongue darted out to wet his lips. “Well, you won’t hear any complaints from me,” he choked out.

Dean grinned and swiveled his hips in a lazy figure eight, pulling a groan out of Cas. He waited for Cas to open his eyes before planting his hands on Cas’ chest and rising up on his knees. He paused for just a second, and then slammed back down, punching the air out of both his own lungs and Cas’. Cas planted his feet flat on the mattress, thrusting up to meet Dean every time he slammed back down on Cas’ cock. They set a fast pace, their breaths harsh, skin slapping against each other. 

And then Cas was sitting up, wrapping his arms around Dean’s shoulders and rolling them. Dean landed on his back, panting, and Cas grabbed his legs and hooked them over his shoulders before pounding back into Dean. The new angle had Dean seeing stars on nearly every thrust as Cas continuously nailed his prostate, and Dean realized the long, drawn out moans were coming from himself. 

“Open your eyes, Dean. Look at me. Want to see you fall apart.”

Dean hadn’t even realized his eyes had closed, but he forced them open, locking on to Cas’ gaze. His eyes were dark, blown pupils surrounded by the smallest strip of blue. “Cas…gotta…I need…” 

Cas didn’t look away as he reached down and took hold of Dean’s cock in a loose grip. His fingers barely grazed Dean as he slid them up and down. It wasn’t enough. Dean felt like he was going to implode. He needed more. He needed it harder and faster and before he’d realized, he was begging. “Cas, please, need more. Need to come. Please, Cas, please …”

Cas teased him for a few minutes, Dean begging incoherently, tears pricking at his eyes with the need to come, until finally Cas tightened his grip and began working Dean’s cock over to the same rhythm he was pounding into Dean’s ass. It only took a half dozen or so strokes before Dean bucked up violently, coming with a shout, hot cum spurting out and landing on his chest. Cas worked him through it before dropping his cock  and redoubling his efforts, practically bending Dean in half as he leaned over Dean to kiss him. “So good for me, Dean,” he groaned between kisses. “So beautiful when you fall apart. So perfect. Gonna come inside you, fill you up.” He dropped his head to Dean’s shoulder, hips starting to lose their rhythm as his orgasm built, until he suddenly tensed, and Dean could feel his cock twitching as he spilled deep inside him. 

Dean groaned as Cas pulled out, both mourning the loss of being filled and dreading the inevitable feeling of cum leaking out of him. Cas collapsed next to him, one hand resting over Dean’s heart. Dean brought his own hand up to cover it, squeezing gently as they both caught their breath. After a few minutes, Cas leaned over and rooted around in the first aid kit, emerging with a few packets of wet wipes that he used to clean them both up before manhandling Dean under the blanket and pulling him close.

Dean relaxed into Cas’ embrace, resting his head on Cas’ chest and listening to the soothing beat of his heart as the storm above them raged. Cas’ hand stroked gently through his hair. He was quiet for a few minutes, gathering his thoughts, and then he began to speak, quietly, barely more than a whisper.

“My dad used to be a bull rider. Did I ever tell you that?” He felt Cas shake his head, his hand never pausing. “He was good. Like, really good. He qualified for the National Finals Rodeo when I was four.” He smiled at the memory, remembering his dad’s grin and his mom’s squeal of delight. “I wanted to go with him so badly, but Sammy was only six months old and mom didn’t wanna drag him halfway across the country to Vegas, and dad wouldn’t have been able to watch me by himself so I had to stay home.” He shook his head, still smiling. “Course, they spun it as me having to stay and be the man of the house, take care of mom and Sammy, you know?” Cas huffed a gentle laugh, most likely knowing how to manipulate a kid like that. “So, we stayed and dad went on his own. We didn’t have the internet out here back then, or satellite TV, so the day he competed, we all crammed around Bobby’s TV to watch. 

“I didn’t really understand what he was supposed to be doing, but when everyone started screaming and cheering, I clued in that he’d won. God, I was so proud of him. Mom was so happy,” he paused, chuckling. “Though looking back, she might’ve just been happy about the $80,000 he’d be bringing home.”

Dean grew quiet for a moment, gathering his thoughts, Cas’ hand still scratching pleasantly through his hair. “There was a storm that night. Woke me up in the middle of the night. I was terrified. Never heard anything so loud in my life. I was hiding under the covers when my mom came running in carrying Sam. We didn’t have a storm cellar back then, so she dragged me to the downstairs bathroom and put me in the tub. Told me to lie down and handed me Sam then she took off. Came back a few minutes later dragging a mattress that she hauled on top of us. She was about to climb under it when…”

Dean’s breath hitched and he felt a tear slip down his cheek. “It was too late. Twister hit the house and a beam fell on her. Sh-she died instantly. I mean, I didn’t know that at the time. I kept screaming at her to wake up. She fell on the mattress, pinned by the beam, and I was trapped. I couldn’t move, couldn’t even turn my head to check on Sammy. All I could see were her dead eyes and all I could feel was her blood dripping down onto my face and I was so scared…” he gasped out a sob, and Cas’ arms encircled him, holding him close.

“That’s why you had the panic attack when you felt the blood on your face?”

Dean nodded. “I was so scared, Cas,” he whispered again. “I thought I’d be stuck there forever. It was the first tornado in the area in fifty years, and no one really knew what to do after. And, you know, town of less than four hundred people? Ain’t exactly swimming with emergency services. The twister took out the bridge over the river, so no one could get out here. Bobby finally drove out to his buddy’s ranch and borrowed a horse and rode here. He’s the one who found us. But by then, we’d been trapped for almost twenty hours.”

“Dean,” Cas breathed, voice full of sorrow. “I’m so sorry.”

“Sammy got really sick. Pneumonia. From being in the cold and wet for so long when he was so little. Physically, I was fine, but…”

“But that’s why you stopped talking.”

Dean nodded against Cas’ chest. “I felt so guilty for so long. It was my job to take care of them and I failed.”

“Dean, you were just a child. A little boy. There’s nothing you could have done.”

“Yeah, I know. But back then? I thought, you know, maybe if I hadn’t been so scared of the storm I would’ve gotten up sooner, got mom and Sam. Like I should’ve known it wasn’t just a regular thunderstorm. Or I should’ve protected Sam more so he didn’t get so wet. Found a way to wriggle out of my shirt or something to keep him warm.”

“Dean…”

“I know. But that’s just how kids think, you know? It just….it took a long time for me to figure out it wasn’t my fault.”

“I can’t imagine what that must have been like for you,” Cas said softly.

“I think….I think that’s why I’m so protective of Claire. ‘Cause I’ve been there. And you’re right. You can’t know what going through something like that is like or how it fucks you up.” Dean paused, shifting to look up at Cas. “I’m not saying you haven’t done an amazing job with her or you don’t know, theoretically, what she’s feeling. But it’s not the same as having experienced it.”

Cas smiled down at him, soft and understanding. “I know what you’re saying, Dean. You’re right. I can’t know. Even if she was able to tell me, it’s not the same as experiencing it.”

Dean nodded and settled his head back on Cas’ chest. “She’s lucky to have you.”

“She’s lucky to have you, too, Dean. You and Sam and Eileen. God, if you’d seen her six months ago, you wouldn’t recognize her. I think, even though she doesn’t know how similar your stories are, I think she senses it. Knows that you understand. She’s quite taken with you.”

Dean huffed. “Nah, she just likes me ‘cause I let her hang out with the horses.”

Cas chuckled. “We both know it’s more than that.” He hesitated before going on. “Dean, where’s your father? Is he…?”

“Still alive?” Dean shrugged. “Don’t know. He shut down after mom died. Started drinking a lot. He took off the minute Sam turned eighteen after nearly running the ranch outta business and blowing through our college savings. He at least signed the deed over before he left. ‘S’why we had to sell off some of the land for Sammy to go to vet school and why we had to start the dude ranch. We’re outta the red but depending on cattle prices, it can get pretty tight budget wise. But yeah, he kept in touch off and on the first few years, but haven’t heard a peep in over five years.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. He made his choice and it was never us.” Dean chuckled bitterly. “I’d have turned out a helluva lot better if I had a dad like you growing up. Like I said, Claire’s lucky to have you.”

“Hey,” Cas said, turning on his side to face Dean. “You turned out amazing. Claire and I are both lucky to have you in our lives.” He leaned forward and kissed Dean sweetly before pulling away. “I’m sorry for everything you went through, but all of that only proves how strong and brave you are.” 

Dean looked away, heat rising in his cheeks. “Yeah, well, ain’t enough therapy in the world gonna make me believe that.” He glanced back at Cas. “Anyway, enough with the childhood trauma recap. What do you say to round two?”

“I’d say you’re a very smart man, Mr. Winchester,” Cas grinned before rolling back on top of Dean and kissing him soundly. 

And yeah, maybe Dean didn’t really believe all the nice shit Cas said about him, but if it was followed by Cas on top of him, naked and kissing him? Well, Dean could definitely get on board with that.

Castiel woke the next morning, buried deep under the blanket, with something heavy laying across his legs. He shifted, trying to dislodge the weight before sighing. “Dean.” Dean grunted, still mostly asleep. “Dean, get off me. You’re heavy.”

“‘M not on you,” Dean groaned, shifting beside him and throwing an arm over his stomach and trying to wrap one of his legs over Castiel’s. Whatever was on his legs stopped Dean’s impromptu cuddle session. Dean’s eyes blinked open, meeting Castiel’s. “Uhh…”

They both sat up, throwing the blanket off them. 

“Meh-eh-eh.”

“Dean, your goat is cutting off the circulation in my legs.” Castiel glanced at Dean, seeing him biting his lip to keep from laughing. “This isn’t funny, Dean.”

“No, no, it’s not. It’s freaking hilarious!” Dean reached over the side of the mattress coming back with his phone in his hand. He started snapping pictures of Cartman where he was curled up on Castiel’s lower legs. “Claire’s gonna be so jealous,” he teased.

Castiel glared at Dean who finally lost the battle and started laughing. “Alright, alright, I’ll move him.”  

Dean climbed off the mattress, dressing quickly in the clothes they’d discarded the night before. “Come on, Cartman, I think we’ve got some granola bars stashed down here. Let’s leave Mr. Grumpypants alone to get dressed.”

Castiel huffed. “You’d be grumpy, too, if you woke up to 200 pounds of goat on you.”

Dean clutched his chest in mock horror. “Are you calling my goat fat, Cas? Rude. He’s a pygmy goat. He doesn’t weigh more than 100 pounds.”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Whatever. Just get him off me.”

Dean grinned and stooped to pick Cartman up, setting him gently on the ground, then turning and heading back to where all the supplies were. Cartman stayed behind, watching as Castiel got dressed. “Stop staring at me. It’s creepy.” Cartman just blinked and continued creeping on him until the distinctive sound of a crinkling wrapper got his attention. He turned and trotted out of the room towards where Dean apparently had found food.

Castiel followed, thanking Dean for the granola bar he passed him with a kiss on the cheek. “So,” he started after swallowing the first bite, “think it’s safe to go out there?”

Dean nodded. “Should be. Can’t hear the wind, so that’s a good sign. Twister must’ve got the cell tower cause I’ve got no signal, so we’re on our own until the posse arrives.”

“You think they’re OK?” he asked tentatively. 

Dean wrapped his arms around him and pulled him close. “Yeah, I do. Would be pretty unlikely for the twister to stay on the ground long enough to make it to town. And even if it did, Bobby’s storm cellar is even more of a bunker than this place.”

Castiel nodded, finishing his granola bar and watching Dean feed pieces of his own to Cartman. When he was done, Dean took his hand and led him towards the stairs. “You ready?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be.”

“Alright, let’s do this.” Dean led the way up the stairs, unhooking the beam of wood from the brackets and then pushing up on one of the doors. It moved easily and sunlight was soon streaming down the stairs. Dean flung the other door open and Cartman bolted past them, racing out into the day. Dean followed, Castiel only a step behind.

He gasped as he took in the devastation. 

The first thing he noticed was the tree, roots and all, sticking out the side of the barn, the barn’s roof crumpled around it. “Jesus,” he heard Dean mutter. “We don’t have trees like that around for at least ten miles.” 

Castiel shook his head. “At least you got Cartman out.”

Dean huffed an incredulous laugh. “Yeah. And, looks like it missed the tack room, so, you know, that’s thousands of dollars of equipment I don’t have to replace.”

Castiel took his hand, squeezing it gently. “Silver lining.”  He looked down as he heard a clucking sound. One of the hens was pecking away at the ground by his feet, and glancing around he saw the other chickens roaming. “Looks like most of the chickens made it. I feel bad for not even thinking about them last night.”

“Wouldn’t have been able to do anything anyway. We didn’t have time to move thirty chickens down.” Dean nodded towards the chicken enclosure. “Looks like debris just took the fence out. Coop is still standing so they probably all made it.” He started to turn back towards Castiel when his eyes widened. “Oh, fuck.”

Castiel followed his gaze to the guest cabins. Or what was left of them. Three of them had been completely decimated. The laundry cabin had crumpled around the machines and the cabin between it and Castiel’s was missing its roof. Castiel moved his gaze towards his and Claire’s cabin.

“Oh my god.”

Dean’s truck was upside down in what should have been Claire’s room, tires spinning slowly in the breeze. The front wall had completely collapsed and the roof was gone. Castiel stood frozen. If Claire had been there…

“Cas!”

Castiel snapped his eyes to Dean, vision blurring as tears threatened to spill. “Dean, your truck. That’s Claire’s room. If she’d been there…” 

“Hey hey hey. She wasn’t there. She’s safe. Even if she’d been at the ranch, she would’ve been with us. She’s OK, sweetheart, I promise.” He pulled Castiel close, rubbing his back soothingly. “I already told you, I’d never let anything hurt her.”

Castiel nodded, then pulled back as he heard a car approaching. They both turned to see Castiel’s SUV approaching, Sam behind the wheel, Eileen next to him. Claire was in the back, window down, waving at them. He and Dean walked over to meet them. Sam jumped out, pulling Dean into a hug, while Castiel made straight for Claire.

“Hey, Claire-bear. Are you OK?” he asked as he unbuckled her. 

She nodded. It was scary but Bobby had kittens and Eileen taught me how to braid and we practiced on Sam.

He heard Dean snort behind him and turned to see Sam’s look of betrayal. “That was supposed to be our secret!”

Claire grinned. Eileen took pictures. Castiel caught Dean’s face lighting up, but then Claire was signing more and he focused back on her. Were you scared Papa? 

“I was, but Dean took really good care of me and Cartman.”

I’m glad you’re OK , Claire signed, before throwing her arms around him.

“I’m glad you’re OK, too, sweetheart,” Cas replied, kissing the top of her head and hugging her tightly.

Claire squirmed out of his arms after a minute and ran over to Dean, who was talking quietly with Sam. She tugged on his shirt to get his attention, and Castiel’s heart swooped at the soft smile Dean gave her before scooping her up in his arms. “There’s my little bear!”

Claire gave him a hug before leaning back, and Castiel watched as she signed. Thank you for taking care of Papa. And Cartman.

Dean’s eyes flicked to his before focusing back on Claire. “Well, Papa took care of me, too. But you’re welcome.”

Claire beamed at him. Can we get a kitten?

Castiel laughed as Dean turned to Sam with a glare. “Really, Sam? Sticking a six year old on me?”

Sam pulled out the puppy dog eyes and Claire followed suit. “Come on, Dean! There’s only one left, all the others have been adopted and are just waiting to get older before they go home. It’s really cute!”

Yeah, it’s really cute! And Charlie said you collect orphans!

Dean turned to Castiel. “Cas, can’t you control your kid?”

Castiel shook his head. “Can’t you control your brother?”

Dean looked between Sam and Claire and sighed. “I guess we’re getting a kitten.”

Chapter Text

Castiel was surprised at how quickly the ranch was cleaned up and repairs were made. He was more surprised at the number of people who showed up to help. It seemed like everyone in town showed up at some point, either bearing food or muscles to help with repairs. When Castiel questioned him, Dean had just shrugged and said that’s how things were done in small towns, and Castiel had no doubt that if it had been another family’s home in need, Dean would have been first in line to help. 

Luckily, the main house had survived relatively unscathed. A few shingles were lost from the roof and debris had taken out the living room window, but other than that, the house remained untouched. Thankfully, the Winchesters had a generator for the house, so they weren’t without power.

The fence of the chicken enclosure was mended within hours of them emerging from the shelter, mainly so they could round up the chickens so they weren’t in the way. Since Claire wanted to help so badly, Dean had put her in charge of rounding the chickens up, which she happily did. It took a few hours for her to track them all down, but in the end, they’d all survived and were safely back behind the fence. 

The barn and the rental cabins though? Castiel hadn’t even known where to start, so he was happy when Dean pulled him along to his cabin so they could salvage what they could, pulling out his and Claire’s clothing and as many of Claire’s toys as they could find. Castiel’s laptop was destroyed, but he wasn’t too concerned since he backed everything up to the cloud anyway. He didn’t even care that much about his belongings, just wanting to find as much of Claire’s things as he could, a task made difficult by the fact that Dean’s truck took up most of her room. 

They managed though. It was hard, but Castiel clung to the small moments of happiness they found throughout the days, like when he found Claire’s bear sweater, dirty but undamaged, in the corner of her room, or the joy on Dean and Claire’s faces when the horses turned up for dinner and they saw that Chevy and Applejack were OK. 

The best part, though, was him and Claire moving into the ranch house at Dean’s insistence. Castiel had offered to find a hotel but Dean insisted, even going as far to say he’d return Castiel’s money he’d paid, which Castiel refused. So, Claire was set up in the guest room and Castiel had been spending his nights with Dean. 

Which is where he found himself currently, curled up in bed, Dean in his arms, a month after the storm. It was early, too early, but it was Christmas morning, and he knew it was only a matter of time before Claire came bursting into the room. 

“You’re thinking real loud there, Cas.”

Castiel hummed, smoothing his hand down Dean’s back. “Should probably get up soon.”

Dean grinned and rolled his hips, brushing his morning wood against Castiel’s thigh. “I’m already up, baby.”

Castiel snorted. “I am not retraumatizing my daughter by having her run in on us while I’m fucking you.” They both turned towards the door as they heard footsteps running down the hall. “See?”

Dean snorted. “Good call.” 

The door burst open and Claire flew in, jumping on the bed between them. She was followed by the kitten that Sam had brought home two weeks earlier, a little calico that Claire had promptly named Rainbow Dash, because she’s got lots of colors!  

Dean groaned and pulled the blanket over his head. 

Papa! Papa! Get up! It’s Christmas!

“I know it’s Christmas, but it’s pretty early. And you didn’t knock.”

Claire’s face fell. Sorry, Papa!

“It’s OK, but you should probably apologize to Dean, too.”

He watched as Claire pulled the covers back off of Dean’s face, Dean blinking blearily up at her.

Sorry for waking you up. And not knocking.

Dean smiled softly, pulling Claire down into a hug, and Castiel’s heart ached at the tenderness of it all. “It’s OK, Little Bear. Tell you what…why don’t you and Papa go start making coffee while I go feed the horses. But no peeking at the presents!”

OK! Come on, Papa!

Claire grabbed his hand, pulling him from the bed and towards the door. He glanced over his shoulder to see Dean with a bemused smile on his face, petting the kitten that was now curled up in his lap. Dean blew him a kiss, and Castiel felt his cheeks darkening. Even after a couple of months, he still couldn’t believe Dean wanted to be with him. 

He followed Claire down the stairs and to the kitchen, making sure she didn’t spot the pile of presents waiting under the tree. The Winchesters had gone completely overboard on Claire’s presents. Every time Castiel had tried to get them to stop buying her something, they had agreed, only to show up with more presents. He didn’t even know what half the things they got her were, but he trusted them and let them spoil his baby.

He heard Dean moving down the upstairs hallway, a bang on a door and a hollered “Up and at'em, Sammy!” before Dean entered the kitchen. “Alright, give me ten minutes. Don’t start presents without me.” He turned to Claire. “Can you feed Dash while I’m gone?”

Who? Claire asked innocently.

Castiel bit back his laugh. It had been an ongoing battle between them, Dean refusing to call the kitten her full name and Claire refusing to acknowledge who he was talking about when he shortened the name to Dash . 

Dean grit his teeth. “Can you please feed Rainbow Dash for me?”

Of course! Claire smiled sweetly. Dean rolled his eyes, kissed Castiel on the cheek, and headed for the barn.

Sam and Eileen stumbled into the kitchen a few minutes later, gratefully accepting the mugs of coffee Castiel handed them and chatting with Claire while she fed the kitten and they waited for Dean to return. Castiel watched them with amusement, neither Sam nor Eileen having experience with a child on Christmas morning. Claire’s enthusiasm was contagious, though, and the couple were soon wide awake, eagerly waiting for Dean.

When the front door opened, Claire began bouncing on her toes. Is it present time?!

Castiel chuckled. “Give Dean time to take his boots off.”

A minute later, Dean stuck his head in. “Alright, we ready?” 

Yes!

Dean laughed. “Well, let’s go then!” He turned and headed for the living room, Claire hot on his heels, Castiel, Sam, and Eileen following along. 

Claire’s jaw practically fell off when she saw the pile of presents waiting under the tree. Are they all for me?!

Dean ruffled her hair. “Most of them. Some are for us old folks.” He glanced at Castiel. “How do you want to do this? We usually just have a free for all, but if you want to do one at a time…”

Castiel shook his head. “I don’t think Claire has that much patience,” he laughed. “Probably easier to just set her loose.”

Dean nodded and looked down at Claire. “Well, you heard Papa. Go crazy!”

Claire beamed and rushed toward the pile. “Make sure you check the tags before opening them!” Castiel called after her. She nodded and began tearing into the presents.

Castiel settled on the couch next to Dean, handing him a mug of coffee, watching as Claire devoured the presents. Every so often she would find one for one of the adults and bring it over to them, quick to hurry back to her pile. 

Castiel could barely keep track of what she’d gotten. Most of the presents were from “Santa” but a few were from the adults. A set of children’s vet scrubs with her name embroidered from Sam. A pair of cowboy boots from Eileen. A navy blue cowboy hat from Dean. Castiel smiled as Claire shoved it down on her messy curls. Now I’m like you! she happily told Dean.

Dean gifted Castiel a black Stetson because “you can’t be the only one in the family without one, Cas.” Castiel, of course, was more interested in how dark Dean’s eyes grew when he tried the hat on. Interesting, he thought. Perhaps something else for the list… 

Castiel, in turn, gifted Dean an advanced copy of his next novel. Dean’s eyes grew big and round when he realized what it was. “I didn’t even know you finished it!”

“I wanted it to be a surprise,” Castiel told him, biting his lip. “Check the dedication.”

Dean flipped forward a couple of pages. “To Dean. For restoring my faith. For giving me hope.” He closed his eyes for a moment before finding Castiel’s. “Cas…”

Castiel leaned forward and gave him a soft kiss. “It’s true.”

Dean smiled up at him. “Thank you,” he said, pulling Castiel in for another kiss.

Sam cleared his throat pointedly from across the room, and they broke apart, both of them blushing. “Looks like Claire’s done. Breakfast?”

“Oh, Claire,” Castiel turned to her. “Your present for Dean is still upstairs!”

I’ll get it! She jumped to her feet and ran from the room.

“She didn’t have to get me anything, Cas.”

“Well, technically, she made it, so…”

Claire ran back in and shoved the present at Dean before climbing on the couch, squeezing between the two of them. Open it!

Dean carefully unwrapped the package, revealing a small book. He glanced at Castiel before opening it. Castiel heard his breath hitch as he took in the first picture.

Claire had drawn a series of pictures of the last year and with Charlie’s help, Castiel had scanned them and had them printed in a book. The first picture was Claire, sitting on her bed, with big blue tears falling down her face. The next was her and Castiel in a car, Claire looking out the window, still looking sad. The third was Claire in her bear sweater, standing next to Castiel and smiling up at Dean and Chevy. Castiel glanced at Dean. He was biting his lip, eyes glassy, as he flipped through the pages. There were pictures of Claire with Eileen and the chickens, with Sam and the kittens, with all of them and Bones. A picture of Dean in the back of his truck with Applejack. Claire had drawn over two dozen pictures of her favourite memories of the ranch. In every one, Claire had drawn herself with a giant smile on her face. Castiel heard Dean sniff as he turned to the last picture and saw him swallow harshly. It was the three of them, Claire between them holding their hands. The background was a giant red heart, and all three of them were smiling. 

Do you like it?

Dean blinked back his tears, pulling Claire into a hug. “I love it, Little Bear. Thank you.” He looked at Castiel over her shoulder. Thank you , he signed. 

Thank you, Castiel signed back. For everything.

Dean shook his head and closed his eyes, pulling Claire close. After a minute, he sat back. “Alright, who wants breakfast?”

They headed to the kitchen where the five of them (well, four, as Claire got in the way more than she helped) made quick work of cooking up a hearty breakfast. When they were done, Dean stood. “Gonna go let the horses out.” He winked at Castiel. “See you soon.”

Castiel nodded, checking his watch. When Dean had been gone for five minutes, he turned to Claire. “Hey, sweetie, why don’t we go help Dean get the horses’ dinner ready? With both of us helping, it will go much faster.”

Sam piped up then. “Why don’t we all go? Then it’ll be really fast!”

OK!

“OK, go put a sweater on,” Castiel told her. She ran out the room and he turned to Sam and Eileen. “Ready?”

“It’s showtime,” Eileen smiled.

They met Claire at the front door, shoved their jackets and boots on and headed out. Just before they entered the barn, Castiel stopped Claire. “Dean told me he has a surprise for you, so you have to close your eyes.”

What kind of surprise?

“If I told you, it wouldn’t be a surprise, would it?”

Claire pouted but closed her eyes. Castiel took her hand. “Now, don’t open them until I say so, OK?” She nodded and he led her into the barn. He smiled at Dean, who grinned back. “OK, Claire, you can open them.”

Claire opened her eyes, taking in the scene in front of her. Dean was in the middle of the aisle, holding Applejack, who had a big red bow around her neck with an oversized gift tag attached. “Go read the tag, sweetie.”

Claire walked forward and flipped the tag over. It was big enough that Castiel could read it from where he stood a few feet behind her.

To: Little Bear
Merry Christmas!
Love: Dean

Claire’s eyes widened and she looked up at Dean. She’s for me?

Dean nodded. “Yeah, sweetheart, she’s for you.”

Claire threw herself into Dean’s arms. Thank you!! She hugged him for a minute before leaning back. What about when we go home?

“Well, me and Papa talked about it, and we thought it’d be best if she stayed here and I’ll look after her and you can visit her. And when she’s older, I’ll get her trained up real good so you can ride her. How’s that sound?”

Claire considered it for a moment before nodding. This is her home so she should stay here. Me and Papa will just have to visit lots.

“Sounds good to me,” Dean told her softly, eyes finding Castiel’s. “You guys can visit whenever you want.” He handed her the lead rope and made his way to Castiel. 

“You’ve made her very happy.”

Dean scoffed. “It was a joint decision, Cas. Take some credit.”

Castiel shrugged. “It was your idea.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “Whatever. Come here.” He pulled Castiel into a kiss, kissing him deeply for a moment before pulling back. “Just some incentive to get you to visit more often.”

Castiel laughed. “With an incentive like that, I might not leave.”

Dean grinned and kissed him again. “Alright, go pet your kid’s new horse. I’ll be right back.”

Castiel nodded and joined Claire in fussing over Applejack. I’m so happy, Papa!

“Me, too, sweetheart,” he told her. “Applejack is very lucky to have you and Dean looking out for her.”

Claire nodded. I’m gonna take really good care of her! Can we visit lots? Please, Papa?

“We’ll visit as often as we can, honey. I’m not sure how frequently that will be. We’ll just have to wait and see, OK?”

Claire nodded and Castiel watched as she stroked Applejack’s nose. He knew she was worried about leaving the ranch and wondering when they’d be back and Castiel would be lying if he said the same thoughts hadn’t crossed his mind.

He was pulled from his thoughts by the unmistakable sound of a horse clip-clopping towards them. He turned, brow pulling together when he saw Dean holding Lucy who had the same red bow and gift tag around her neck that Applejack had. “Dean?”

“Read the tag, Cas.”

Castiel’s heart thumped as he stepped towards Lucy and flipped the tag over. 

To: Cas
Merry Christmas!
Love: The Winchesters

“Dean, no, I can’t accept this,” Castiel started, but Dean cut him off.

“Yes, you can. She’s from all of us. The ranch owns her so it was a family decision and we all agreed.” Dean paused, a smile forming on his lips. “Besides, you can’t be the only one in the family without a horse.” 

Castiel looked over at Sam and Eileen. “Are you guys sure?”

“Of course we are,” Sam told him. “Like Dean said, it was a family decision. And we decided that everyone in the family needs their own horse.”

Castiel looked down as Claire tugged on his jacket. Is Lucy yours now, Papa? she asked, eyes wide.

Castiel huffed out a disbelieving laugh. “It looks like it.” He turned back to the three Winchesters. “I don’t know what to say. Thank you.” He hugged Eileen and Sam and turned to Dean, shaking his head. “Thank you,” he repeated.

Dean pulled him close, kissing his cheek. “You’re welcome, sweetheart.” He turned to Claire. “Alright, let’s turn these two out with the other horses, OK?” He handed Lucy’s lead to Castiel. “Since she’s yours, you get to do the honors.”

Castiel smiled as he took the lead rope and followed Claire and Applejack down the barn aisle. They stepped outside, unsnapping the horses’ leads from their halters and watched them trot away to join the rest of the herd. Claire tugged at his jacket again, and he looked down at her.

This is the best Christmas ever!

Castiel could not agree more.

A week and a half later, the day Dean had been dreading finally arrived. It was time for Cas and Claire to head back to New York.

Dean and Cas had spent hours together the night before, making plans and making love, Dean trying desperately to cling to consciousness, wanting to savor every moment he could with Cas, but in the end, sleep had dragged him under. He awoke the next morning in Cas’ arms, his back to Cas’ chest, his hand clutching Cas’ hand against his stomach, as though they were both trying to hold back the dread that was already causing Dean’s stomach to flip. He sighed and rolled over.

“Cas.”

“No.”

Dean smiled against Cas’ chest. “Come on, grumpy. You gotta get up. Hit the road early.”

Cas blinked his eyes open. “I don’t want to go.”

Dean’s smile turned sad. “I know. But you gotta.” He sat up and held out his hand. “Come on. If you get up now I’ll give you a blow job in the shower.” He waggled his eyebrows suggestively, hoping his false bravado covered his sadness.

Cas huffed and let Dean drag him out of bed and into the shower. Dean kept his promise, dropping to his knees and working Cas to hardness, but Cas pulled him off before he could finish the job, pulling him back up and spinning him around. Dean heard the sound of the lube bottle being opened and a second later Cas was entering him in one smooth glide. He groaned as Cas bottomed out, pausing for only a second before setting up a brutal pace. 

Cas’ hand clapped over his mouth. “Shhh, Dean. Don’t want to wake everyone up with those obscene sounds you make, do you?” Dean squeezed his eyes as he groaned again around Cas’ hand, his own hands scrabbling at the tiles as he tried to hold himself up. Cas lifted one of Dean’s legs up, letting his foot rest on the side of the tub so he could fuck Dean deeper. Dean’s muffled cries as Cas nailed his prostate only seemed to spur him on. “Gonna have to get you a gag, Dean, if you insist on being so loud. Would you like that?” Dean moaned, trying to make it sound positive. “Yeah, I bet you would.” Cas slipped three of his fingers into Dean’s mouth. “Like that, baby? Like having your mouth full while I fuck you? I could get you a dick gag. Would you like that? A dick in your mouth and one in your ass? You’d look gorgeous.” Dean tried to nod, absolutely on board with Cas’ idea. He could feel his orgasm approaching, and he slid one of his hands down towards his dick, only to have Cas bat it away. “You have to ask, Dean.” Dean whined, trying to beg around Cas’ fingers. “Sorry, what was that? I’m sorry, Dean, but if you can’t ask, you can’t have.” 

Dean didn’t care that he was incoherent, he kept whining and trying to beg around Cas’ fingers, grunting and moaning in between words. He could feel Cas’ rhythm faltering, his breath panting across Dean’s back, and then he was tensing, the hand on his hip digging bruises into his skin, the one on his jaw tightening, Cas biting down on Dean’s shoulder to muffle his own shout of pleasure. And fuck, that little hit of pain was enough to send Dean tumbling over the edge, too. He cried out around Cas’ fingers as he came untouched, dropping his head to the tiles to catch his breath. Cas’ fingers left his mouth and both arms wrapped around Dean from behind. Dean watched the spray wash his cum away.

When he’d caught his breath, Dean turned in Cas’ arms, resting his forehead against Cas’. “That’s one helluva way to start the day.”

“Well, I had to leave you with something to remember me by.”

Dean snorted. “What? A twinge in my ass and a bite mark on my shoulder?” He huffed out a laugh, glancing down where Cas had chomped him. “You’re really into marking your territory, huh?”

Cas smiled sheepishly. “Sorry. I didn’t actually mean to do that.” His hand came up to Dean’s shoulder, fingers grazing over the mark. “It’s probably gonna bruise.”

Dean hummed. “I don’t mind. It’ll last longer.” He tilted his head and kissed Cas sweetly. “Come on, we should get started on breakfast.”

Cas nodded and they made quick work of finishing up their shower and dressing. When they made it downstairs, Claire, Sam and Eileen were already in the kitchen and had started breakfast. Claire looked up as they walked in. Did you have a nightmare?

Dean’s brow furrowed. “Uhh, what?” He glanced at Eileen, who was biting back a laugh, and then at Sam, who threw him Bitch Face #27.

“Yeah, Dean,” Sam sniped, “we heard you crying when we got up.”

Dean felt his blush rising in his cheeks. “Umm…”

“Dean did have a nightmare, sweetie,” Cas stepped in. “He’s OK now, though. Papa took care of him.”

“I’ll bet you did,” Eileen muttered, a bemused smile on her face. Behind her, Sam groaned.

“Alright! Breakfast!” Dean cried, desperate to change the subject. Cas winked at him as he walked past. “What do we got?”

Dean helped Sam finish breakfast and soon they were all seated around the table. They were quieter than they usually were, none of them looking forward to Cas and Claire leaving. They finished eating and Sam ran out to feed the horses while Dean and Cas cleaned up. They both knew they were stalling, but Dean was willing to take every second he got with Cas.

And then, it was time. Dean watched sadly as Claire scooped up the kitten, kissing the little beast’s head. Bye, Rainbow Dash. She turned to Bones and pulled him into a hug. Bye, Bones. Her eyes were already welling with tears and Dean could feel his own eyes prickling. 

Sam came up as they filed out on the porch. “Hey, Claire, you wanna go say bye to Applejack before you go? Cartman’s in the barn, too.” Claire nodded and Sam turned to Cas. “Alright, man, you drive safely, OK?” 

Cas nodded and Sam pulled him into a hug, thumping his back. He stepped back and let Eileen move in for a hug. “We’ll talk to you guys soon, OK? Take care of each other.” She sniffed as she let Cas go.

“Thank you both, for everything.”

Sam and Eileen nodded and said their final goodbyes to Cas before heading to the barn with Claire. Dean turned to Cas. “You got everything?”

“I think so.”

Dean nodded. “OK, well, you call tonight when you get to your hotel. And tomorrow when you get home.” They’d planned the route out a few days prior, Cas deciding to just plow through two ten hour days of driving. “And if anything comes up, you call. OK? Whatever it is.”

Cas nodded, biting his lip. “Dean…” he trailed off and Dean noticed how glassy his eyes were.

“Hey, hey,” Dean pulled Cas into a tight hug, breathing his words into Cas’ hair. “This isn’t goodbye, OK? It’s, see ya later. OK?” He pulled back a bit, thumb grazing Cas’ cheek. “We’re gonna call and we’re gonna Skype. And you can come back anytime you want. Just show up in the middle of the night if you want. Crawl into bed and ravage me.”

Cas huffed. “Definitely gonna -”

“-add that to the list, I know.” Dean smiled down at him. “I mean it, Cas. This doesn’t change anything for me. I’ll be here, waiting for you.”

Cas sighed, leaning his forehead against Dean’s. “I’m going to miss you.”

“Gonna miss you, too, sweetheart,” Dean said softly, tilting his head to brush their lips together. “Gonna miss you so much.”

They both glanced towards the barn as they heard the door open, watching as Eileen knelt down to give Claire a hug, signing something to her that Dean couldn’t make out. When that hug was done, Sam bent down and scooped Claire up into a hug. Dean’s chest panged as he saw Claire bury her face in Sam’s shoulder and Sam wipe a tear from his eye. He wasn’t the only one who was going to miss the Novaks.

Sam and Eileen finished their goodbyes and headed back into the barn as Claire made her way to the car. Dean crouched down as she approached. “You ready to go, Little Bear?”

Claire nodded sadly. I’m gonna miss you.

“Oh, sweetheart, I’m gonna miss you, too.” Dean pulled her into a hug before he stood, holding her at his hip. “But we’re gonna talk every night and I’ll send you pictures of AJ and Dash -” he paused as she scowled at him. “Sorry! Rainbow Dash. And before you know it, you’ll be back for a visit.” Claire nodded again. “Alright, Little Bear, let’s get you buckled in.”

He carried her to the back door, which Cas opened for him, settling her in her booster seat and strapping her in. “You be good for Papa, now, OK? You take care of him for me.”

I will.

“That’s my girl.” He kissed her cheek and stood. “See ya later, Little Bear.”

Bye, Dean. Her little lip trembled as she signed, big blue eyes full of tears. Dean’s heart ached.

He turned to Cas. “Alright, sweetheart, I’m gonna kiss you and then you’re gonna go before I start crying, OK?

Cas huffed but let Dean pull him into a lingering kiss. Dean savored every second, not knowing when he’d get this again. When he’d get to feel and taste and touch Cas again. Eventually, the need to breathe broke them apart. Cas looked up at him, his blue eyes just as watery as Claire’s had been. “See you later, Dean.”

Dean nodded and stepped back. “See ya, Cas,” he whispered.

Cas got behind the wheel and started the car, hesitating for a moment before sending one last, sad smile Dean’s way. And then he was pulling away, driving down the gravel driveway towards the road. Dean’s tears finally spilled over.

He watched until they made the turn onto the road before sighing and heading towards the barn to throw himself into his work. He was so lost in his thoughts, he didn’t notice Sam and Eileen in the barn’s doorway until Sam spoke.

“So, that’s it? You’re just gonna let them leave?”

Dean looked up at him, brow furrowed. “What the hell am I supposed to do? They have to go.”

“Why?”

“ Why? They’re whole life is in New York!”

“Right,” Sam scoffed. “Some life. What’s there for them? A family that disowned him because he’s gay? His ex’s family who blame him for their son’s death and want nothing to do with him? Or Claire?” Dean’s eyebrows shot up at the realization that Cas had confided in Sam. “Yeah, he told me. You’re not the only one who got close to them, Dean.” 

“So what am I supposed to do? You know how it goes, Sam. Everyone always leaves me in the end.” Dean shook his head bitterly. “Lisa. Cassie. Michael. None of them stuck around.”

“They may have left, Dean,” Eileen spoke up, “but did you ask them to stay?”

Dean’s jaw snapped shut. He thought back, realizing that he hadn’t. Not that he hadn’t cared about them, of course he had, but not enough for him to fight for them. For him to ask them to stay, to try again. But Cas…

“Shit.”

Sam rolled his eyes. “Yeah, exactly.”

Dean could feel the panic rising, heart thundering in his chest. “What do I do?”

Eileen smiled, stepping back around the corner before reappearing with Chevy, fully tacked up and ready to ride. “You go get your family.”

“Yeah,” Dean said, taking Chevy’s reins and hauling himself into the saddle. “Yeah, OK. You think he’ll stay?” he asked Sam.

“I think he’s just as gone on you as you are on him. So, yeah, I think he will.” Sam clapped a hand on his leg. “Go through the barn. Door’s open to the pasture. The northeastern meadow gate is the closest to the road.”

Dean grinned down at Sam. “Thanks. Both of you.” He turned Chevy down the barn aisle, trotting through the pasture door before urging Chevy into a lope, pausing only briefly to open and close the gate to the meadow. Dean turned Chevy towards the northeast, just barely able to glimpse the gate from where they stood. Looking back down the road, he could see the dust Cas’ car was kicking up. “Alright, buddy. Race time again. Gotta win this time, OK?”

Chevy snorted and Dean squeezed his legs, urging him into a gallop. He loosened his reins, giving Chevy his head to run. As Chevy tore through the meadow, Dean had a fleeting appreciation for both his thoroughbred and mustang lineages - two of the fastest horse breeds in the world. Dean put all his faith in Chevy to get them to the gate before Cas passed by.

As Chevy ran, Dean kept watch on the road, monitoring how far along the car was. He grinned as the gate came closer, knowing they were going to reach it first. “Atta boy, Chev!” he hooted. 

They slowed as they neared the gate, and Dean made quick work getting them through it, making sure it was secure behind them. He nudged Chevy up the ditch onto the road. They were at the bottom of a hill that Cas should be cresting any minute. Dean patted Chevy’s neck as they waited. “Thanks, buddy. I owe you.” Chevy stomped his foot and snorted, chest heaving as he caught his breath. 

Dean heard the car before he saw it, looking up just in time to see it come over the top of the hill. It slowed as it approached, pulling to a stop a few feet away from them. He could see Cas saying something to Claire and Claire signing back before she pouted and crossed her arms. Cas opened the car door, getting out.

“Dean? What’s going on? Is everything OK?”

Dean jumped down from Chevy, tugging him along behind him as he stepped closer to Cas. “Everything’s fine, Cas. I, uh, I just…” he trailed off as he stared at the ground, scuffing his boot through the dirt. Better to just get it out , he thought. He looked back up at Cas. “Don’t go.”

Cas’ brow furrowed. “What?”

“Don’t go,” Dean repeated. “Stay. Here. With me.”

“Dean…I…we have to go back…”

“Why?” Cas opened and closed his mouth a few times, his head tilting to the side as he thought, seemingly unable to come up with a reason. Dean pressed his advantage. “Everyone always leaves me, Cas. Everyone. Thing is, I never asked them to stay. I mean, I cared about them, sure, but I guess I never thought it was worth asking.” He stepped closer to Cas, hand reaching up to stroke his cheek. “You’re worth it, Cas. You’re worth everything to me. I need you to know that. I need you to know that I love you.”

Cas gasped and a tear slipped free from his eye. His hands came up to grip the front of Dean’s shirt. “I love you, too.”

Dean let his eyes slip closed as he brought their lips together, relishing in the feel of Cas, in his hands, against his lips. In his heart. He broke the kiss to whisper against Cas’ lips. “Stay.”

Cas nodded. “OK.”

Dean grinned and hauled him back in for another kiss, delving into Cas’ mouth with his tongue, brushing fingers through his hair, down his back. They were so deeply into it, neither of them heard the car door open or Claire’s approach until she was tugging on their jackets.

What’s going on?

Cas smiled down at her. “How do you feel about staying at the ranch?”

Claire’s eyes lit up. Forever?

Cas chuckled. “Well, we’ll have to see about forever, but definitely for a while.”

Claire nodded enthusiastically. Yes!

Dean wrapped his arms around Cas from behind. “I don’t know, Cas, I kinda like the thought of forever.”

Cas laughed. “Worst proposal ever.”

Dean kissed his cheek. “Yeah, that was kinda lame. I’ll try to think of something better.” He turned to Claire. “Wanna ride back with me?”

Can I Papa?

“Sure, sweetie.”

Dean remounted Chevy and took Claire when Cas passed her up. “Alright, you hang on to the horn and I’ll hang on to you, got it?” Claire nodded and Dean turned to Cas. “I’ll stay on the road. Just follow behind us.”

Cas nodded and Dean moved Chevy out of the way so he could turn the car around. Once Cas was set, Dean urged Chevy into a slow lope, hanging tight to Claire. He glanced down to see her face practically split in two by her grin. He was sure he was smiling just as big.

They loped up the driveway and came to a stop by the barn, where Sam and Eileen were waiting with equally bright smiles on their faces. Sam helped Claire down and she gave him and Eileen big hugs. Cas pulled up and got out of the car just as Claire signed We’re staying!

“Yay!” Sam and Eileen cheered.

“You two don’t look very surprised,” Cas noted.

Sam shrugged. “We’ve been watching you two dance around each other since you got here. Figured it was only a matter of time before you both realized you’re better together.” He turned to Claire. “Want to go tell Applejack the good news?”

Yeah!  

Sam and Eileen each took one of Claire’s hands and led her out to the pasture. Dean and Cas watched, Chevy standing guard beside them. 

Cas sidled up next to him, wrapping an arm around his waist. Dean dropped a kiss to the top of his head. “Welcome home, Cas.”

Chapter Text

One Year Later

Dean trudged through the woods towards the house, the clouds overhead obscuring the moon and making him curse for not having brought a flashlight with him. It was a week before Christmas and the last thing he needed was to end up in the hospital because a branch poked his eye out or something.

He was on his way back from Sam and Eileen’s house, newly built in a clearing just a five minute walk from the ranch house, still on the property, still close enough for Dean to keep an eye out for his little brother, but far enough that everyone would have some semblance of privacy. The last year had been crowded, especially once Cas had moved in all his and Claire’s belongings from New York. Sam and Eileen had been talking about starting a family and everyone figured it was time for them to get their own place.

So, the last six months had been spent building their new house. The Winchesters, along with Cas’ input, had decided not to rebuild the guest cabins and to stop being a dude ranch. They’d received enough money from the insurance after the tornado that they had a bit more leeway with the finances, and after running the numbers they’d realized it made more sense to just bank the cheque from the insurance company instead of spending it all and hoping they made enough with tourists. Combined with the fact that Bobby had finally retired, so Sam was now making more money, and Cas insisting he contribute, they were doing pretty well. 

Dean had been shocked when Cas had shown him his bank statement. He’d known Cas’ books were popular, but holy crap, there were a lot of zeros on that statement. Dean had teasingly called Cas his sugar daddy which resulted in Cas pinning him down and fucking him senseless, stating he wanted to get his money’s worth. Dean grinned at the memory.

Sam and Eileen were mostly moved in, but they weren't entirely comfortable moving in completely until Dean had wired up the lighting system for the doors and smoke detectors. They’d promised Dean one last big family meal if he finished them tonight, hence Dean heading home, in the dark, on his own.

He emerged from the woods, heading across the yard towards the house. He blinked as he stepped into the perimeter of the motion activated yard light, momentarily blinded by the light. He heard someone yell “Now!” and then he was under attack.

He was surrounded, being sprayed with something sticky. He heard yelling and cheering and laughter and he was so confused. “What the fu-heck?” he yelled, spying both Claire and Ben amongst the crowd and cutting off his curse. He looked around. Every friend and family member seemed to be there. Ben, Lisa and Dr. Matt. Sam, Eileen and Claire. Bobby, Ellen, and Jo. Charlie, Benny, and Garth. Even Missouri was there. All of them in a circle, holding canisters that were spraying him with, he looked down, silly string?

What the fuck?

The assault came to an end and Dean glanced up to see Cas in front of him, an annoyingly attractive smirk on his face. “What the hell, Cas?”

Cas shrugged innocently. “I told you I’d get my revenge.”

“Revenge? For what?” Dean’s jaw dropped. “For getting you with the hose?! That was over a year ago!”

“Yes, it was.” Cas stepped closer. “I did warn you.”

Dean pouted. “Yeah, well, I’m probably gonna die now. I think I swallowed some of this crap!”

Cas reached his hand out and swiped some of the silly string off Dean’s cheek. “Don’t worry, it’s edible.” He plopped his finger in his mouth, tongue teasing over his finger.

Dean felt his blood starting to detour south. “Edible, huh?”

Cas smirked again. “I promise I’ll clean you up later,” he said, winking at Dean. He stepped back. “That is, if you answer my next question correctly.”

Dean groaned. “Cas, come on!” Cas stared impassively back at him. “Fine! What is it?”

Cas took another step back and dropped to one knee, pulling out a box. Dean’s eyes grew wide. “Dean, a year ago, I showed up on your doorstep broken and lost. I had lost my faith, and my hope for a happy future, for me and Claire, was dwindling. I needed a miracle and I found it in you. You showed me what love is, what family is. You are the most selfless, loving human being I will ever know. You became my best friend, my confidant, and my lover.” He opened the box revealing a beautiful platinum ring. “Now I’m hoping that you will do me the honor of becoming my husband.”

Cas smiled and looked to his left and Dean followed his gaze to see Claire running over. “Of course,” Cas continued, “I’m a package deal.”

Dean gasped as Claire dropped to one knee beside Cas, pulling out another box and opening it to reveal a second ring. She smiled up at Cas and he nodded at her before they both turned back to Dean and simultaneously signed and spoke.

Will you be my dad?

“Will you marry me?”

Dean’s knees gave out and he sank to the ground in front of them. “Yeah,” he choked out before clearing his throat. “ Yes. Yes to both of you!”

Claire threw herself into his arms, nearly knocking him backwards. He wrapped one arm around her and with the other pulled Cas in for a kiss. When he pulled away, he could see Cas’ eyes shimmering with tears, and he could feel his own tears on his cheeks. 

Cas and Claire both sat back, each reaching for one of Dean’s hands, Cas his left and Claire his right. They slid the rings on the ring finger of each of Dean’s hands. Dean didn’t know where to look first, but Cas gave him a subtle nod towards Claire, so he turned to her first, raising his right hand to look at the ring. It was black tungsten with a silver, running horse inlaid on the top of it. Dean smiled down at Claire. “Thank you, Little Bear, I love it.” He pulled her into another hug. “I promise I’ll try to be the best dad for you.”

Claire squeezed her arms tightly around his neck, turning her face towards him. “I love you,” she whispered.

Dean’s heart squeezed tightly. Claire had been doing a lot better with her speaking over the past year and she’d signed I love you to him often, but that was the first time she’d spoken it out loud. “I love you, too, Claire. So much.” 

Claire pulled away, turning to Cas and giving him a big hug before turning and skipping back over to Sam and Eileen. Dean turned to Cas, who was still holding his left hand. Dean raised them to see the ring, a platinum band with a strip of sapphire inlaid in it. “Cas, it’s beautiful.” He glanced up, meeting Cas’ eyes. “Matches your eyes.”

Cas blushed. “That’s what the sales lady said.” He looked down at the ring. “Do you like it? We can exchange it if you don’t.”

Dean scowled. “Don’t even think about trying to take it back. The only time this ring is coming off is when we get married, and that’s just so you can put it right back on.” He looked down at their linked hands, squeezing Cas’ hand softly. “Really, Cas, I love it. I love you .”

“I love you, too,” Cas said, before leaning forward and kissing him. 

All around them, cheers erupted, and Dean suddenly remembered that they were surrounded by their friends and family. “Guess I gotta wait for that cleanup you promised, huh?”

Cas smiled against his lips. “Just for a little while. Sam and Eileen are going to take Claire to their place for the night, so after we make the rounds we can sneak away.”

“God, I am marrying a genius,” Dean laughed before kissing Cas again. “Come on then,” he said, getting to his feet and pulling Cas up. “The sooner we say goodbye, the sooner I can get you naked.”

It ended up taking an hour before they could sneak away and it was another two hours before Dean, cuffed to the headboard and, by that time, a sobbing wreck, was allowed to come, but Dean wasn’t complaining. 

It was the best goddamn night of his life.

Six Months Later

They were married on the first day of summer, the marquis tent set up again in the horse pasture, this time in front of dozens of chairs that were slowly being filled by friends and family. Some of Cas’ friends had even flown out from New York - his cousin, Gabriel, his editor, Balthazar, and even Claire’s ASL teacher, Stevie. Dean had spent the last five minutes spying on her and Charlie as they flirted up a storm. They’d hit it off right away, and Dean wouldn’t be surprised if Hartford had another New York transplant in the future.

“You ready, baby?” 

Dean turned to where Missouri was standing at the podium, ready to officiate. “Yeah,” he replied, his lips pulling up in a smile. “Feel like I’ve been ready to marry Cas my whole life.”

Missouri smiled back at him. She’d taken to Cas, and Claire, right away when Dean had introduced them, and had immediately agreed to see Claire as a client. She was the reason Claire had made such amazing progress with her speech therapy. She still reverted to signing when she was scared or nervous, but at home, she spoke more than she signed these days. 

And hearing her laugh? Well, that had quickly become Dean’s favorite sound.

“You two were meant to be,” Missouri told him. “I’m glad you found each other.”

“Me, too,” he told her, as everyone started to take their seats. He grinned at Missouri as Sam took his spot next to him and Gabriel stood up on Cas’ side. “Show time!”

Once everyone was seated, the harp player they’d hired started playing a soft rendition of Guns N’Roses Sweet Child O’Mine . Dean turned to look down the aisle, watching as Claire began her slow walk down. She looked like a little angel in her dark blue dress, her blond curls spilling over her shoulders. She beamed as she met Dean’s eye, coming to a stop in front of him. They both turned as Missouri started speaking.

“Family and friends, we are gathered here today not just to witness the union of Dean and Castiel, but to witness the coming together of a family. I have been blessed to know Dean since he was a small boy and even more blessed to see the man he has become, a man full of love for his family and friends. There is no man on earth that I would be happier to see step into the role of Claire’s dad than Dean. 

“I’ve gotten to know Claire quite well over the past year as well, and let me tell you, she and Dean are two peas in a pod. How two people can be so smart, so loving, and yet such troublemakers is beyond me.”  Missouri paused as the congregation laughed and Dean grinned down at Claire with a wink. “It is my honor to stand before you and join these two together as family.” 

Missouri nodded at Dean and he took the ring that Sam handed him. It was an exact match to the one Claire had given him but in reverse - a silver ring with a black tungsten horse inlaid in it. He crouched down in front of Claire.

“Claire, from the moment I met you, I wanted to protect you. I didn’t know then what you’d been through but I felt a connection with you, one that made me want to wrap you up and keep you safe. And as I got to know you, that feeling just grew, until I realized how much I love you.” He took her hand and slid the ring onto her right hand’s ring finger. “This ring is a symbol of a promise I’m making to you. A promise to always be there for you, to always have your back and help you when you need it. A promise to teach you and help you grow to be the best person you can be. I promise to try to be the best dad to you, now and forever. And I promise to remind you every day how loved you are.”

Claire smiled shyly before turning and taking the ring Gabriel handed her. She slid it on Dean’s right hand before she started signing.

When I met you, you made me smile because you knew how to sign. Then you made me smile because you were nice to me and I think part of me knew you understood me like no one else did. Now you make me smile because I love you and I know how much you love me. I promise to always try to listen and do what’s right, the way you taught me. And I promise to try to be good, except when we’re pranking someone or feeding Bones french fries. Dean chuckled along with everyone else. Most of all, I promise to always love you.

Dean pulled Claire into a hug. “I love you, Little Bear.”

“Love you, too,” Claire whispered.

Dean let her go and stood, and they both turned to Missouri. “It is my privilege to be the first to introduce you to Dean and Claire, dad and daughter!”

The crowd cheered for them, Claire pressing against Dean’s leg, waving shyly, before turning and moving to her place beside Gabriel.

Dean turned back to look down the aisle as the harp player started up again, this time with a rendition of Bon Jovi’s Thank You For Loving Me , because hey, even Dean could admit that Bon Jovi rocks, on occasion. His breath caught in his throat as Cas appeared, an absolute vision in his black suit, black shirt and sapphire tie. And yeah, Dean was wearing a matching outfit but fuck if he didn’t think Cas pulled it off a million times better.

Cas took his place next to Dean, taking his hands with a soft “Hello, Dean.”

Dean, for his part, felt dizzy with emotion, knowing he was about to marry the love of his life. “Hey, Cas.”

They turned as Missiouri started speaking again, but Dean barely paid attention, too caught up in his own emotions and excitement. He was marrying Cas! Cas was marrying him! He knew he must look like a fool with how big his grin was, but he couldn’t help it. He was marrying Cas!

Luckily his brain rebooted just in time for them to say their vows. He took the ring (which matched the one Cas had bought him but with emeralds instead of sapphires) and turned to Cas. 

“Cas,” he started, sliding the ring on Cas’ finger, “I vow to make my life forever yours and build my dreams around you. I promise to be your faithful husband. I will love you when the sun shines and when the rain falls, in sickness and in health. I thought today would be the best day of my life, but the thought of spending the rest of my days with you makes me believe the best is yet to come. So when you look at this ring, think of me and remember that I love you, always.”

Cas smiled shakily at him, wiping at his eyes before taking Dean’s ring from Gabriel and sliding it on Dean’s finger.

“Dean, my beloved, my everything. You are my other half. You are the one that makes me laugh when I’m sad, makes me think when I want to be rash, and finds me when I’m lost. You are my guide, my teacher, my heart. I can’t promise to love you perfectly, but I will love you messily, overwhelmingly, inexorably. Let this ring be a reminder that I will be there to catch you when you stumble, carry you over every threshold, and love you every day.”

It was Dean’s turn to wipe the tears from his eyes, and from the corner of his eye he could have sworn half the people watching were doing the same. 

“Should anyone see any reason why these two should not join together in marriage, speak now or forever hold your peace.”

“Meh-eh-eh.”

Dean choked out a laugh, swinging his head around to see Cartman chewing on one of the flower arrangements. “That doesn’t count, right?”

“I think we can ignore the goat,” Missouri chuckled. “Family and friends, it is my honor and my privilege to present Dean and Castiel, husbands and partners in life. You may seal your vows with a kiss!”

Cas met Dean in the middle, their lips meeting in a sweet give and take. Dean tried to keep it somewhat PG but kissing Cas, kissing his husband , inevitably led to Dean wanting more and it was only a few seconds before Cas was opening to him, letting their tongues dance together for the first time as husbands. They broke apart when Missouri cleared her throat pointedly. Cas was blushing and Dean could feel his own cheeks heating.

Claire came back over and stood between them, holding their hands, and Missouri spoke up again. “Let’s have a big cheer for the Winchesters!”

Dean had been shocked when Cas announced he wanted to change his and Claire’s last name, but once Cas had explained that he didn’t want to carry on the name of his bigoted family, Dean had been completely onboard. And it was awesome hearing it announced like that. He shook off the thought and listened to the cheers and congratulations as the three of them made their way back up the aisle. 

There was a table set up outside the pasture, full of paperwork to sign, and that’s where they headed. Dean and Cas signed their marriage license and then Dean picked up the other stack of papers, hands shaking. “You sure about this?”

Cas smiled over at him. “Of course. There’s no one else I’d trust more to take care of Claire if something happened to me.”

Dean nodded and turned back to the papers. Adoption papers. With one swipe of his pen it was official. He was a daddy. The reality of it hit him, and he felt tears spilling down his cheeks. 

“Are you OK?” Cas asked, pulling him into a hug. 

“Yeah, yeah,” Dean sniffed. “I just, you know, when I pictured myself getting married it was just that, a wedding, you know? I never thought I’d get to be a dad at the same time. It just hit me all of a sudden.” He looked at Cas, vision blurring. “Cas, I’m a dad.”

Cas smiled, kissing his forehead. “You’re going to be a great dad, Dean. You already are. You know it was Claire’s idea for her to ‘propose’ when I did, right?”

Dean shook his head. “Really?”

“Mmmhmmm. You’ve been a dad to her for far longer than you realize.” He wiped the tears from Dean’s face. 

“God, I can’t believe this is real,” Dean said. “I can’t believe I get to spend the rest  of my life with you.”

“This is just the beginning, Dean,” Cas told him, turning them so they could watch their guests start to party. “We have so much to look forward to.”

“Yeah,” Dean whispered, turning to kiss Cas’ cheek. “And I can’t wait.”

THE END