Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

"Kaneko, Daisuke." The boy in front of Natsuki calmly and assuredly climbed the steps leading to the top of the stage, his posture and stoicism the calling signs of weeks of practice for such an important and transitional moment in their lives. Like the ones before him, he stood before their principal as he

was congratulated for his success before promptly bowing and accepting the navy blue diploma. A round of applause was heard throughout their hall as teachers, students, families, and friends all joined in to welcome the newly graduated student, and then the cycle repeated itself.

"Kisaragi, Natsuki." A familiar puff of bright pink hair hobbled up the steps with surprising ease, and frightening speed. Natsuki's return to school had been met with a myriad of stares and hushed whispers between students, but she had been determined to finish out the school year as normally as possible. Monika had to consider her friend lucky to be graduating at all as she watched her traverse the stage, the time she had spent in the hospital and recovering from her injuries had left her wondering if Natsuki would be allowed to graduate at all. But between support from the staff and Yuri chipping in when possible, Natsuki had done the impossible in finishing her education.

As she balanced on her crutches to accept the diploma, Monika, like many others, broke into applause as she descended down the steps and followed the rest the same path her classmates had taken to their respective seats. Looking over her shoulder Monika could see Yuri with her fellow homeroom students, a look of pride as strong as any parent's washed over her face as she finished clapping and subtly brushed at her eye. Monika couldn't blame her; with how long they had all fretted over the possibility of Natsuki graduating, it was clearly as big a moment for Yuri as it was for Natsuki.

Natsuki wasn't the only one whose graduation had been a moment of tense uncertainty. It was easy to giggle now when Monika looked back, as Sayori slowly approached the stairs a few students behind Natsuki, but the nights spent staying up and trying to catch her up by the light of their bedside lamp had left both of them exhausted. Sayori hadn't been at the height of her academic career when she had been taken out of school to go to Camp Liberty, and the month of her absence from a proper curriculum hadn't exactly done wonders either. But they had persevered, sacrificing sleep, free time, and naturally every bit of their patience to ensure that Sayori graduated alongside the rest of them. The fact that both had been vying to get their driver's license before the other (Monika had obtained hers a mere two days prior.) hadn't helped matters either.

As the call for, "Moriyama, Sayori." rang out across the graduation hall, Monika knew that it had absolutely been worth every second.

Sayori was all smiles as she approached Principal Katagiri and accepted her diploma, glancing back briefly at the crowd as a round of applause welcomed her into the life of a graduate. Monika wasn't ashamed to say that she clapped louder than most. Sayori exited on the right set of stairs, only giving Monika a mild heart attack as she slipped and went down the final two steps at once, but she carried on with a bright smile and filtered into her seat just beside Natsuki. Monika thought she caught her eye for a second, but before she could be sure she was being ushered towards the stairs alongside her fellow homeroom students. Her time to graduate was almost there.

In a way, education had taken a backseat in their lives for the last six months, something that Monika thought was both a good and bad thing. Who she had been before the game and before this world, that Monika had prioritized education to a very high degree, not so much so that it was all she cared about, but she knew had she stayed so rigorously attached to achieving perfect scores and being the absolute best at everything, she wouldn't be the same Monika she was now. Yet, in doing so, she couldn't help but feel as though she had let a part of herself down. She loved to learn, she found such satisfaction and contentment in expanding her horizons and experiencing new ideas that would mold and leave an imprint on her mind, and she did miss the joy of delving deeply into academia.

But this too was something new to experience and find happiness in, the simple pleasures of life and the joys of mundanity. It was a big world, why shouldn't she experience it to the fullest? Why shouldn't she simply live, both slowly and rapidly? This was always more to learn, between university and a profession along with just life itself. It was her life to live, after all.

Her thoughts were so crowded with the concerns of what had already happened that she realized that she was close to missing what was happening now. Only two students remained in front of her. With a jolt, she realized that her name would be called for everyone to hear in just a minute. It would be the first time being heard by so many, and so little would know the significance of it: a name. But to the ones who did, it would be something incredible, something unheard of. With a glow of excitement, Monika realized that when her name was called she wouldn't be the same girl anymore. A graduate, a fully-grown adult, but more than either of those she would finally be more than just Monika.

"-Herushi." The girl in front of her took to the stairs, and Monika was broken from her thoughts. She suddenly felt nervous. Was her hair straight? Did her concealer cover the dark circles under her eyes as well as she thought they did? What would everyone think of her? Would anyone think at all? She shook her head softly to try and clear away her last minute jitters. This was her moment, her graduation. She looked ahead of her as her classmate descended down the stair on the other side of the stage, and smiled. It was time to start walking forward.

"Ohtori, Monika." Monika couldn't keep the goofy smile at hearing her own family name aloud for the first time off of her face. The formal piano music that played throughout the auditorium seemed so loud now, and she was sure that she was walking too stiffly, but she continued on towards the podium where Principal Katagiri stood with a pleased smile on his face. A part of her thought she should probably be mad for disbanding her club, but she just didn't have it in her now. The man had simply been doing his job, and she really couldn't blame him for that.

"On behalf of Yakumo High, I present to you this diploma with the utmost confidence that you will soar far beyond our school and go on to do great things. May this diploma be only the first of many major accomplishments for you, and we wish you all the best in your new life going forward." Principal Katagiri held the diploma out with both hands, a small smile on his face as he met Monika's eyes, and she in turn accepted with both of hers. She bowed her head in thanks and when she lifted it the graduation hall exploded into a wave of clapping just as it had for her fellows. It wasn't some kind of overwhelming noise, but it was for her, and that was enough.

She filled in her assigned seat next to her classmate and was pleased to find that Sayori and Natsuki were seated in the row in front of her close enough that she could whisper if she leaned forward. The looks on their faces were expected, but no less a joy for Monika to take in as Natsuki rested her arm on the back and gave her a thumbs up while Sayori's fingers covered her mouth. Monika looked down to where her bag had been placed, and was glad to see a bouquet of flowers she had bought sat undisturbed with it. Although they were all in their school uniforms, Monika had to admit that they all looked at their absolute best. Sayori's blazer was closed for once (Though only because she had borrowed Monika's) and her hair had been tied into a cute little ponytail that kept her hair off of her shoulders.

Their eyes met, and a myriad of feelings seemed to swap between them in a single moment.

"You got your family name." Sayori whispered, her smile peeking out from behind her fingers. "Ōtori,

it's such an awesome sounding name! When did you even get that done?" Her eyes were alight with a hundred different feelings and emotions, and Monika was confident they were all positive ones.

"Last month, technically. Remember when we had our first session with Dr. Sakaguchi, and I came home and you were playing the guitar?" Monika smiled as she recalled that day, it had become one of her favorites for obvious reasons. "I got the mail before I came in, but I forgot about it until the next morning. I filled it out and sent it off to the Immigrations Services Agency, and it all went into effect last week."

"Out of all the family names you could have picked." Natsuki sighed. Natsuki straightened her hair for the first time since Monika had known her, and rather than tie it into her usual twintails she had opted for having it slicked back down to her neck, though Monika could see a few strands resisting. It even looked like she had donned a bit of makeup for the occasion. She gave Monika a sad shake of the head and stretched in her seat before readjusting her crutches, which were currently spread out across her and Sayori's lap. "Wish our school did the thing where the class president just gets our diplomas for us. If I have to go up one more flight of stairs, I'm going to stick these crutches up-"

"Shh! Yuri's about to go up!" Monika looked up and saw that sure enough, Yuri was getting ready to take the stage. Her poise and posture radiated formality and professionalism, and each step she took after her name was called was one of grace and purpose. Monika was suddenly certain that she had looked like a drunken baby deer during her walk and sank quietly into her chair with a grimace. She really hoped nobody she knew had been recording that.

Yuri approached the podium and turned to face the principal with the stiffness of a soldier being issued a medal. Principal Katagiri described her as a "model student with a lineage of success and a bright future ahead of her" before holding out her diploma. Yuri bowed as the auditorium burst into applause once again, with Monika, Sayori, and Natsuki making sure their claps weren't missed among the din. Yuri exited the stage just as the others had before her, taking her place in the row of seats behind Monika. Once she sat down, Monika saw that her brow was covered in sweat and if it weren't for the dim lighting and use of makeup, that the whiteness of her face might've made her look almost sickly.

Monika mouthed the words "Are you okay?" to her, receiving a thumbs up in response as she tried to catch her breath. Yuri gave them a congratulatory smile from her seat before bringing a finger to her lips and pointing back to the stage. Yuri's class was the last, and as the remaining students took their diplomas and the chorus of clapping faded out, Principal Katragiri called everyone's attention and as two members of the faculty began to lower a projector screen behind him. With a few test taps against the microphone, he spoke aloud to the graduation hall.

"Seeing the youth of today rise into being the adults of tomorrow is a joy that I, along with the many faculty, teachers, and aides of our school, live to experience. It has been several years since I taught, but the feeling of pride and hope that I feel in seeing these young men and women rise to the challenge of adulthood has never dissipated or waned, despite the less connected position I have with these now former students." He smiled briefly at them all before motioning to the screen behind him. "Before we take a look at some of the memories they have made during their time at Yakumo High, please join me in one final performance of our school's anthem."

Everyone in the graduation hall stood from the seats, including a rather disgruntled Natsuki who, with the help of Sayori and an astonishing fourteen curses, managed to stand and sing quietly beneath her breath. Soon enough a room-wide chorus began as the music began to play, with Monika slipping into the throng of voices alongside her friends. Despite the fact that the lyrics were displayed on the projection screen, Monika could've sworn she heard Sayori's voice trail off into hums, and their eyes caught for a brief second as they swapped smiles.

As the school's song came to a close and everyone returned to their seats, the lights dimmed again as Principal Katagiri bowed to the audience before exiting the stage. The music from their school's anthem switched to something that sounded almost western and folkish despite the words being in Japanese, and the lyrics faded from the projection screen. In their place, the words, "Farewell Graduating Students!" appeared before they too faded to be replaced by pictures that had been taken throughout the school year.

Various friend groups and clubs showed up, with some being improvised while others were from events or celebrations that had taken place through the year. Occasionally a note from younger students would slip in-between the photos with encouraging phrases like, "Please do your best!" and "We wish you the best of luck in all of your adventures!". Some were personal, and some were not. Monika smiled as she caught pictures of a few people she knew, from students to teachers, until the screen changed again and her smile dissipated.

On the screen was a picture of four girls staring at the camera, each of them wearing bright smiles with excitement glistening in their eyes. Natsuki was tucked in between Monika and Yuri, both of her eyes safe and sound in her head as she flashed a peace sign up at the camera. To her left, Yuri shyly smiled at the camera while in the middle of brushing a strand of hair behind her ear, and on the other end stood Sayori with the biggest smile Monika had ever seen. She was holding onto the arm Monika was using to take the selfie, the smile on her own face in the picture a rare look into one that was unburdened and still innocent. Monika, with all of her memories and feelings of everything that had taken place after this one innocuous photograph, smiled back at herself.

She wasn't sure how the photograph had ended up in the reel; perhaps Sayori or Natsuki had sent the picture to the photography club at some point. It was fitting though, a final look at who she had used to be – who they all used to be before moving on once and for all. The picture faded into a different one, and soon the song and the reel came to a close with a final note wishing all of the graduating students good fortune and happiness on their new walks of life. The lights in the auditorium brightened, and before she knew it they were rising from their seats and exiting the auditorium. The clapping remained constantly as they took their final walk through the aisle, and departed the school one last time.

As if on cue, the familiar ringing of the Westminster chime echoed across the grass. A sign of classes coming to an end, this time for good.

The natural spring air and sunlight felt wonderful to Monika after being stuck in the stuffiness and dimness of the auditorium for most of the morning. She basked in the cooling relief for a moment, bag and bouquet in hand, before making her way through the throng of students that were all gathering in front of the school; some were getting together with friends for a picture while others were being congratulated by teachers and parents alike. Monika slid and ducked between the various groups before finding the one person she had been searching for, scanning through the crowd just like she was as their eyes locked together.

"Sunflower!" Monika ran forward and wrapped her arms around Sayori who did exactly the same, holding Monika close as she rubbed her back for a second before pulling back and smiling up at her.

"Hey! Oh my Gosh, we did it! You did it! I- I did it! Not without your help of course, but like- we- aaaah!" Sayori squealed and bounced on the tips of her uwabaki slippers. She took Monika's hands in hers and for a second the two of them just smiled at each other. They had made it. Monika peeked around Sayori, but seeing that she was alone decided to pose a question.

"Is Natsuki not with you?"

"Hm? Oh, she went to find Yuri!" Sayori stood on the tips of her toes, looking around for their friends when she suddenly took on a rather intrigued expression. Monika turned and followed her line of sight and saw through the clusters a pair of students talking to each other, with one of them gesturing towards Monika and Sayori. The second one shook their head and tried to disappear into the crowd, but the first one grabbed them by the wrist and dragged them over to where Monika and Sayori were swapping glances.

Monika realized that the one being dragged was none other than Himari, her blonde hair blowing faintly in the spring winds as she ducked her head down and tried to look inconspicuous. The girl leading her through the crowds didn't seem bothered, and instead approached Monika and Sayori with a smile on her face. Her hair was short and choppy, taupe against her deep tan and eyes that were round and calm despite being the color of an overcast sky. Monika realized with a jolt that she recognized the second girl as well.

"Oh, hey! Gushiken Mizu, right?" Monika asked. "I'm so used to seeing you in your tennis outfit that I almost didn't recognize you in uniform." Mizu bowed politely to both Sayori and Monika before gesturing to Himari beside her, who looked as though she was considering the pros and cons of fleeing from one's own graduation.

"Hey! Yeah, sorry to bother you guys. Himari was lamenting about not getting to say anything to Moriyama since this is her last chance-" Mizu was suddenly cut off by Himari's mumbling.

"I didn't mean that as a cry for help or anything, I was just saying…"

"Yes you did." Mizu countered in an even tone. "You just didn't want to admit it openly. There's no point in playing coy with your own feelings, you know. They're not going to bite you, probably." She smiled back at Sayori and Monika before taking a step back, allowing Himari to stand before them both. She glanced uneasily at Monika for a moment before straightening up and taking a deep breath. She glanced back at Mizu, and then at Sayori again before crossing her hands and bowing her head down low.

"I'm… I'm super sorry- more than sorry, more than I can ever express, for what happened at the festival." Her apology was so formal in form that some students glanced at her as they passed, but Himari continued on. "I did things for reasons I thought at the time could be excused or were justifiable, but they were not. I know I'm not the best person, and like, I can be a major jackass and you have firsthand experience with that- but I should've done better. I should have rejected you politely, and I wish I could take back the things I did and what ended up happening to you and your friends because of it. I'm… so very glad that you're alive and well, Moriyama."

Monika glanced between Mizu's hopeful expression and Sayori's face that was still lit up with surprise at the sudden apology. After a second, Sayori smiled and nodded her head at Mizu before gently raising Himari by her shoulders until she was standing upright again, and wrapped her arms around her in a hug. It was both gentle and firm, and absolutely loaded with hug-energy.

"You're absolutely forgiven, Himari. Thank you for doing your best to be better. You sacrificed your own club just to give ours some more time together, and we can never thank you enough for that." Monika smiled as she stared at Himari's face from its place atop Sayori's shoulder, and the slow creep of tears that began to leak as her face scrunched up. "For what it's worth, I'm glad that you're alive and well too. I'm sure we all are."

"Sorry… I-I'm really sorry." Himari hissed between clenched teeth, her hands gripping the back of Sayori's coat tightly between her fingers. Sayori just smiled and rubbed her back, not letting go until Himari backed away and wiped her eyes on her sleeve. Monika always respected Sayori for never letting go first in her hugs, as she herself had been in that exact position many times before, and she knew well that sometimes she needed an extended hug. Himari smiled at them both, readjusting her glasses and letting out a deep breath.

"Got a bit emotional there, super sorry about that. But uh, thank you. I'm glad I can finally move on from that. Congratulations on graduating you two, I'm gonna go do like… anything else so I can stop crying, ahaha. Good luck to you both, and uh… keep in touch, if you want." Himari gave each of them a final bow of farewell before turning away, Mizu's arm draping over her shoulder as she turned back to give them a thumbs-up in thanks. Monika and Sayori both gave a wave before turning the opposite direction themselves, wading through the clusters and crowds together with their hands intertwined.

Monika couldn't stop herself from smiling as she thought of their encounter with Himari and her Mizu. It was, in her eyes, a nice send off to her high-school career and the time she had spent here. Closure. How many people could say they had obtained that?

"You know, I'm starting to wonder if there's anyone you can't forgive. I mean, if you can forgive me and Himari…" Monika noted as they passed members of the AV club. She was keeping an eye out for their friends, which she had thought would've been a bit easier given the vibrancy of their hair. Of course, there was Natsuki's height to consider.

"You make it sound like I just forgive people willy-nilly." Sayori pouted at her as stood on her tippy-toes to look around the heads of the other students and teachers. "I forgive people who I know have struggled for it, who have tried to do better or actually feel remorse. It sounds kinda harsh, but I only forgive people who deserve to be forgiven, and I think you and Himari do. Some people-" Sayori stopped and suddenly grabbed the back of Monika's head and brought her so close so fast that for a second Monika thought their teeth would collide, but they didn't instead. Instead Monika's lips were instantly tagged into a lovingly forceful wrestling match with Sayori's, her senses seemed to dullen for a moment from the sheer surprise to the point she nearly dropped her things, but it slowly faded into nothing short of bliss.

Monika knew she should stop this, to push Sayori back and ask just what was going on, but the feeling of one hand running through the back of her hair and pressing her gently against her girlfriend's lips was too inviting. The way she felt comfortable and at peace in Sayori's grasp, while the other arm stretched out past her shoulder doing something she could not see, but could feel. Who could resist that?

Nope, nope, people are watching!

Sayori's tongue poked against Monika's lips for just a second, enough for her to welcome it in like an old friend.

Good, I hope they're jealous.

She didn't care how long they kissed like this, or who saw, she just wanted it to last a little longer, for Sayori to desire her for just a moment longer. It made her spine tingle, and her legs were practically shaking when the kissing stopped just as suddenly as it began, and Monika's lips were left hanging in mid-air.

Sayori was still in front of her, breathless and with ears so red she ought to have a fever. She was looking at Monika with an expression that was an odd mixture of anger, satisfaction, and elation. Defiant. That was the expression. Monika was shifting through her own shellshock for a moment before she realized that Sayori wasn't looking entirely at her, but rather looking past her. With a turn of the head, Monika craned her neck to see the very flustered, and undoubtedly insulted, visage of Ms. Kusumoto as she stared at the two of them. Well, that explained the sudden surge of passion.

"Thanks for everything!" Monika smiled at her and gave a friendly wave as though nothing were wrong before turning back to look at someone far more favorable when she recognized another set of faces just a few feet behind Sayori. Yuri was staring at the both of them with a look that bordered between being absolutely affronted and immensely proud, while Natsuki was hiding her face in her shoulder to try and muffle her laughter unsuccessfully. Sayori pulled her hands back from Monika, glancing around at the few people who were giving them awestruck looks and ushering the four of them away from the crowds.

"Sayori," Yuri hissed, "I cannot help but feel the need to remind you that we are indeed still surrounded by our peers, and that many of our former teachers will be valuable assets as we journey into college?" Though her voice was firm there was no denying the satisfied smirk that she was trying to hide by looking away. Sayori chuckled nervously and twiddled her fingers together, giving everyone an apologetic look.

"Oops." The color of her ears had only darkened and Monika could practically feel the embarrassment radiating off of her. Or perhaps some of it was her own. She fingered the kintsugi bow atop her head nervously and glanced around.

"How uh, how long were we…?"

"Oh, five seconds at the most, it wasn't that long." Natsuki assured her, a giggle still on the edge of her breath as she finally pulled herself out of Yuri's shoulder. "Just long enough for Sayori to make out with you and flip off Kusumoto behind your back for half of our class to see."

"Oh she did not, don't lie." Monika rolled her eyes and turned back to Sayori who didn't meet her gaze. Monika suddenly understood why she had felt Sayori's other arm stretched out over her shoulder during their impromptu display, and her mouth gaped as she swatted her girlfriend's side in shock. "Sayori! You did not!"

The pout returned. "I told you I don't forgive everyone." Sayori huffed and crossed her arms, but within seconds she was smiling again and leaning into Monika's embrace as they shuffled about. They met a few old friends and teachers, each saying their respective farewells and swapping numbers when the occasion called for it when a certain figure caught Monika's attention out of the corner of her eye. She smiled at the sight of the familiar towering stature and eagle-like features of her former homeroom teacher, and told her friends she would be right back before skipping off.

The group of parents Ms. Fujita had been speaking to bowed in farewell before turning away, allowing Ms. Fujita to turn just in time to see Monika bounding up towards her. Her eyes twinkled in the way they always had whenever someone answered a particularly tough question, and the smile she gave Monika made her feel like she had just scored high in a test that was purposefully intended for someone well above her skill level. Ms. Fujita bowed in greeting, and Monika did the same.

"Congratulations on your graduation, Ms. Ohtori. And just as vitally, congratulations on your successful change in name, just in time for your final exam and graduation.I can only hope that as your homeroom teacher I managed to play my part well enough in regards to pushing you towards those achievements." She chuckled softly, waving a hand away as though to brush away her jest. A joke from Ms. Fujita? That was a first. "Truly though, you've done very well for someone with less than fortunate circumstances. Your perseverance and determination at such a young age is notable, when I've had many a student who struggled to give the bare minimum of effort."

Monika smiled and bowed her head in gratitude. "That's very kind of you, Ms. Fujita, considering I know how rare your compliments can be. But the teasing you did about pushing me to do better was no joke to me." She swallowed and slowly presented the bouquet from behind her back. "As someone who has had a lack of firm guidance from adults in my life, I can't help but think back to the times you stuck your neck out for me, helping in little ways that nobody else was around to do for me. I'm only an Ohtori because rather than offer a helping hand, you picked me up by the scruff and hoisted me up. I have nothing but thanks to give you, Ms. Fujita. Even if sometimes your quizzes gave me migraines."

Ms. Fujita stared at Monika and her offering of flowers for a moment, adjusting the glasses on her nose as though they might help her focus on what Monika was saying. Slowly, she took the bundle of flowers from Monika's hands and admired the pink carnations closely. Her former homeroom teacher looked confused, and then with a small jolt as though someone snapped at her eyes, she gave Monika a very soft and genuine smile. Monika smiled back.

"This is… well, this is a very touching- you know, I didn't think I'd even get one of these with how I teach in such a strict manner, but I am quite glad to know that I was able to have at least a little bit of an effect on one of my students. That's all we ever hope for, truly." Ms. Fujita closed her eyes for a moment, and when she opened them again, the twinkle in her eyes was brighter than she had ever seen it. "You know, Ms. Ohtori, I don't give out compliments often, but I think you have everything to gain as you move on from this place. And I believe, as I do with all students who show such promise, that we have so much to lose in saying goodbye to you."

Monika beamed and bowed low one final time as she said farewell to Ms. Fujita, and turned to find her friends once more. For a second she worried that they had been separated in the hustle and bustle yet again, but soon saw the trio standing in front of two familiar figures shaking hands with one another. Ichiro and Mr. Moriyama were speaking to one another in greeting while the girls were whispering amongst themselves, and as Monika approached from behind she overheard snippets of their conversation while their family introduced themselves.

"... sorry I got the last laugh on Ms. Kusumoto, she was just so sneaky and disrespectful to us!"

"Eh, it's fine. I took a picture of her smoking in my old spot and sent it to Principal whatshisface. Knowing she's on probation at the start of the next school year is my closure on that."

"Jesus, Natsuki!"

"What?! She made you cry."

Monika smirked and slyly slid in-between Natsuki and Sayori, taking Sayori's hand in her own and smiling as Mr. Moriyama and Ichiro noticed her. Mr. Moriyama looked a lot better than the last time Monika had seen him, and a lot more like the time she had stumbled across him outside of the city hall. A nice gray suit and sweater vest to accompany it, with his beard trimmed and his glasses only slightly askew as he clapped Monika on the shoulder.

"Well now, I hear we get to call you 'Ms. Ohtori' now! Congratulations to you, I can't tell you how proud I am to see that you and Sayori both graduated. With her mother's lack of coordination and my ability to get easily distracted, well, I feared-"

"Dad!"

"- nothing short of absolute excellency, of course! Granted, it helps if you're dating what I'm told is one of the smartest students in the year." He nudged Monika good-naturedly while Sayori crossed her arms and stuck her tongue out at them both.

"Mr. Moriyama and I were just discussing the idea of treating you four to a little celebratory lunch." Ichiro said as he gave Monika a thumbs up. He wore the same navy yukata that he had when Monika had first met him during the conversation with Sayori's mother, and Monika had to wonder if he ever wore anything besides it. "How does ramen sound?" There was a small resounding cheer as Sayori and Natsuki each let out a whoop and high-fived as Mr. Moriyama smiled and left to pull his car around. Yuri, Natsuki, and Ichiro waved temporary farewells as they planned to meet them at the ramen shop, and as they left Monika couldn't stop herself from looking back towards the school behind them. This would, in essence, be the final time she would be here. She might pass it on the street or think of it, but she knew that this was it.

She lamented not having a final melody to play on the beautiful ebony piano in the music room, or to say farewell to the classrooms that had become so familiar to her over the course of the semester. It felt weird to say goodbye to a building, but it had become a part of her routine day-to-day, and so much had happened within those halls, even in the short time she had been here. It didn't help of course that the room that had been her entire universe was inside, likely empty and silent.

"You're thinking about the club, aren't you?" Sayori said from beside her. Monika nodded and Sayori looked up towards the third floor where a particular set of red curtains covered a set of windows. "I was too. It's so strange to be leaving this place, you know? Even without the memories of the game, there's just so much here between all of us. Did you… want to go up and see the club room, one last time?" She glanced over at Monika ever so slightly like she was inspecting her reaction, but Monika just shook her head.

"No. We've already said goodbye to it. I'm okay with that, with moving on from this place." Monika took a deep breath and a final look at the school before turning back towards the street. "I'm going to spend the rest of my life covering up all of the bad memories of that room with as many good memories as I can make, going forward." Sayori smiled and turned her back on the school as well, taking Monika's hand and bringing it to her lip for a quick second before peering down the road to see her father pulling up beside them.

Mr. Moriyama was driving a dark blue sedan, the exterior being so shiny and sleek that Monika was certain it had to be brand new. Even Sayori looked surprised as it pulled up beside them and Mr. Moriyama stepped out to open the doors for them. Monika slipped in the back, suddenly terrified of staining or scuffing the leather interior and found herself trying to take up as little space as possible. Sayori was looking at the cupholders and seat warmers like a kid getting a ride in Santa's sleigh.

"Ooooh, dad, when did you get this? It's all shiny and fancy looking!" Sayori asked. Mr. Moriyama glanced back and grinned, fixing the rearview before pulling out into the street.

"Gift from your Uncle Eiji, his wife got a liftback so he sold it to me for dirt cheap. Make yourselves comfortable, girls."

They spent the rest of the early afternoon together in a fancy little ramen stand beside the park. The weather was a little cool, but the sun kept them just warm enough as they sat and enjoyed their noodles together while chatting amongst themselves. Monika would discuss university options with Ichiro who was more than happy to talk about the different parts of college life until Natsuki grew bored and demanded a change in topic on the grounds that she, "Had graduated and earned the right to not hear anything educational for at least a week". There the topic changed from Natsuki discussing her favorite types of ramen, to Mr. Moriyama inquiring about when they would start trying for their driver's licenses, to Yuri discussing how certain she was that the graduation walk was harder than any test she had taken.

Finally Yuri turned to Monika and prompted her with a question. "What made you decide on your family name, if I might ask? When I heard the Principal say 'Ohtori, Monika' I wondered if there was another Monika in the school we simply weren't aware of at first." Natsuku snorted into her ramen at that, trying and failing to pass it off as a cough as she took a long sip from her soda while giving Monika the smuggest look she had ever seen.

Someone that small has no right being that smug.

"Yeah Monika, what uh… what made you choose a name like that? Please tell me you ate some really good chicken or something and just got really inspired, please tell me that's where it came from, I will lose my shit right here I swear." Natsuki's mouth quivered with the obvious urge to laugh and Monika sighed, using her ramen as an excuse not to answer.

"I don't get it…" Sayori looked between the two of them, a puzzled expression on her face as she slurped up a particularly long noodle. Yuri sighed from the other side and leaned past Natsuki to answer over the girl's snorting and giggling.

"Ohtori has several meanings and transliterations, from a 'key performer' to a 'sea eagle' but one of the oldest is transcribed from the 'Fenghuang', which was a female Chinese phoenix." She rolled her eyes at Natsuki beside her who was smiling encouragingly, nodding her head for her to continue. "And yes, a common meaning of the name is 'large bird', something I'm sure stems from its origins. Are you happy now, Natsuki?"

"Not until I get to call her 'chicken leg'." Natsuki snickered, giving Monika a playful shove. Monika rolled her eyes but shoved back, grinning into her bowl. From her left side Sayori wrapped her arms around Monika's, leaning her head against her shoulder for a minute and smiling softly. Monika recognized that look. Without a word they continued eating and basking in each other's company, occasionally joining the jokes and conversation but their eyes every so often would catch and send a silent spark between them before they carried on.

After a time they all finished their meals, and once Mr. Moriyama and Ichiro had paid they set out to the parking lot where their respective cars were waiting. Sayori had just given Natsuki and Yuri each a big hug and was headed for the backseat of the sedan when her father stopped her with a confused expression.

"Sayori, what are you doing?" He asked. Sayori looked at Monika who shrugged back at her and then back at her father.

"Getting in the car…? I think? Should I not be?"

"Well I can't imagine you'll have an easy time driving the thing from the backseat, kiddo. Of course, you've proved me wrong before." He chucked her the keys to the sedan and smiled proudly as she gaped at the small ring now cupped in her hands, looking in shock from her father to Monika who was just as surprised, but smiling encouragingly all the same. She leaned on Sayori's shoulder and looked down at the keys before giving her girlfriend a congratulatory peck on the cheek, which earned her a fake retching from Natsuki behind her.

Sayori's mouth was still hanging open as she looked at the keys. "But I- wha- when did- BUT I DON'T EVEN HAVE MY LICENSE YET!" She looked dejectedly from Monika to her father, but Mr. Moriyama just laughed and shook his head as though he expected nothing less.

"Great, now I have to drive you home in your own car? Come on, Sayori, give this old man a break." He smiled and reached into the interior of his suit, digging around until finally pulling out a flowery envelope that was wrapped in a pretty pink ribbon which he handed to Monika. "I believe when we had breakfast together I entrusted a bit of yen to you to give to Sayori? Well, it's not much, but I hope you accept this envelope all the same in honor of your graduation. Please, spend it on something fun that you'll enjoy!" Monika took the envelope and tried to hide the gleeful smile on her face. This was going to make their plans a lot easier.

"I will, I promise." Monika bowed her thanks and stuffed the envelope into her purse before wrapping her arm around Sayori and pulling her into a side-hug as they smiled at her father together. "I have my license, so I can drive the two of us home tonight – but don't worry, I'll make sure she gets hers soon! (''Parallel parking is silly, and you won't convince me otherwise." Sayori pouted as she crossed her arms.) Thank you very much Mr. Moriyama, and to Ichiro as well, this has been a wonderful graduation." She bowed again, and Sayori, Yuri, and Natsuki followed suit.

Ichiro cringed from the passenger seat of Yuri's car and slunk down into the seat. "I can't hang around your friends Yuri, they're too respectful, they make me feel old."

"Hey, Ichiro! Budge up, scruffy, I want to sit next to Yuri!"

"Nevermind, I'll take feeling old, please." Ichiro smirked and swapped seats with Natsuki while Yuri rolled her eyes from the front seat and gave Monika a grin. She mouthed the words "See you tomorrow" as she pulled out of the parking lot, with Natsuki giving a final peace sign from the passenger side. Monika and Sayori waved their farewells before climbing into the sedan with Monika taking the driver's seat and Sayori the passenger. Sayori was still "Oohing" and "Aahing'' while patting the leather seats and marveling at the cupholders.

As Monika took the keys and started the car, Sayori poked her head out of the window and called out to her father. "Sure you don't want us to give you a ride home?" He raised a hand and shook his head, jabbing his thumb down the street behind him.

"Of course. I'm going to go celebrate with all the other proud parents at the little karaoke bar down the way. You two have fun, and again, my utmost congratulations. I'm… so unbelievably proud of the both of you." With that he quickly turned away, a hand of farewell in the air as he hurried down the sidewalk in the opposite direction. Monika rolled down to the windows to allow the cool spring air to blow through them, and soon they were both on the road. Sayori held a hand up to the orange bow atop her head to keep it place, but she smiled out of the window. The car handled well, and though Monika was still relatively new to driving, she liked the smoothness of the acceleration and the receptive turning. She was going to hate giving this back to Sayori already.

Monika grinned over at Sayori as she drove them through Yakumo. "Your dad is pretty cool, you know that?" Sayori smirked from where she was resting her chin in her hand on the window, the air whipping her hair behind her as they drove.

"He was totally crying when he walked away." She chuckled, and for the rest of the ride home they were both quiet as they took in the cooling breeze of the afternoon, each one simply enjoying the company and presence of the other. It was a peaceful silence, bereft of any awkwardness or tension lying beneath words or secrets. It was exactly how Monika liked it, how it should have been from the very beginning. Peaceful. Normal.

When they arrived home, Monika parked the car right outside of their apartment door and followed an exhausted Sayori inside where the comfort of their bed awaited them. Graduating and socializing took a surprising amount out of the both of them, and by the time Monika had taken a shower and changed into something more comfortable she wasn't surprised to find Sayori with eyes drooping as she laid in bed with her arms wrapped loosely around Mr. Duck. Mr. Cow was taking up his rightful position as backrest, and Monika slinked onto the bed to take up her own.

Sayori looked up as Monika crawled onto the bed, smiling warmly and relinquishing her hold on Mr. Duck to offer her arms up to Monika instead, fingers clenching and unclenching in a grabbing motion. Monika happily obliged, practically falling atop Sayori as their arms coiled around each other's backs and pulled each other closer. Monika buried her head atop Sayori's shoulder where it belonged, and felt the cooling touch of Sayori's bare legs against her own. For a few minutes they sat there, wordlessly listening to the other's breath while feeling their hearts softly beat together. It was warm, familiar, and safe.

Just as Monika felt the lull of sleep begin to pull her away, Sayori lifted her head and smiled while softly caressing Monika's cheek. "You're falling asleep, coffee-girl. We gotta stay awake so we can get a full night's rest for tomorrow, remember? If you fall asleep now, you won't sleep tonight." Monika sighed inwardly as Sayori gently pushed a string of hair out from her eyes, knowing inside that she was right. She looked up at her girlfriend and managed a smile of her own, something that was easy to do when their eyes met.

"Yeah, I know. I don't know if I can do it on my own though, think you can help me stay awake, love?" Monika asked. Sayori took on a determined expression and saluted Monika, balancing against the mattress with one hand.

"Yes Ma'am, madame president!" And in an instant Sayori was upon her, pecking her cheek and face with kisses that made her giggle and squirm under her touch. But then her lips were starting to descend past her cheeks and down her neck, sending a new sensation through Monika that only made her squirming worse. Her giggles were quickly being replaced with an entirely different sound now.

"Say, wait- I'm not your… president anymore, you gooball. When I said keep me- Oh! I didn't mean to keep me awake like that!" Monika protested. Sayori raised her head and cocked it at Monika like a dog might. A golden retriever with big blue eyes; that's what Sayori would be. "I mean- I don't mind, I just… are you sure you're comfortable doing this again? We haven't done this in a while."

"Yep!"

Monika sighed and shook her head. If Sayori didn't mind after everything that had happened, after all that she had experienced at Camp Liberty, she certainly didn't have a complaint. "Alright, you got me. But uh, is there any chance you could kiss me like you did today? In front of Kusumoto? I love how soft and gentle you are, Sunflower, but it was a nice little change of pace for you to be so assertive and uh, dominant. Passionate, maybe? God I wish there was a better word, I just liked how it felt like you were showing everyone I was yours and yours alone and-" Monika's words were cut short as Sayori's mouth pressed against hers, her tongue prying apart Monika's lips and nestling their way inside her mouth without a care. Monika shivered, wrapping her arms around her girlfriend's neck and pulling her closer. Now this was more like it.

Sayori's lips parted from hers just long enough for them each to catch a breath. Sayori smiled at her, and Monika knew that she was likely flushed red and giving off a less than subtle expression at how much Sayori's actions were affecting her. With only a few fumbles, Sayori unbuttoned her night-shirt and allowed it to hang open; the window of the open shirt gave Monika a clear view inside which surprised her in how much it made her jitter on the inside. Someone with as low dexterity and lack of balance as Sayori had no right managing to be as sexy as she was, intentionally or not, but Monika loved it all the same.

"Ready?" Sayori asked, a soft and sultry tone to her voice as she planted her knee firmly in place between Monika's legs. Monika sighed and nodded.

"Shut up and make love to me already you damn dork." Monika cooed, and to her absolute credit, Sayori didn't waste a second more in doing exactly as she asked.

"Ack, we're going to be late, late, late!"

"No, we're not. See? It's not even six yet. Of course, if we are late, you only have yourself to blame since I asked you to wake me up yesterday, not wear me out."

"Wha- but- you said that last time!"

"And I suppose those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it, aren't we?"

Monika ducked under Sayori's arm as she rushed to pack their bags. They had managed to clean and ensure everything looked nice while they were gone, but the excitement of graduating had left them too exhausted to properly pack for the day. Monika thanked her lucky stars she had had the common sense to set an early alarm for them, but that didn't make them any less pressed for time. Sayori's overall dress only had one strap fixed, and Monika was still running back and forth in her underwear trying to pack the essentials. Two trips in one day meant twice the amount of packing, unfortunately.

Just as Monika finished gathering their contributions to load into the car, that being a case of fruity soft drinks, straws, and the silverware, she realized with a jolt that she had completely forgotten to pick out something to wear for the occasion. Panic seized her as she threw open her drawers and cupboards; why hadn't she set out a set of clothes the night before like Sayori had? The weather was warming up so she wouldn't need a jacket, and a part of her wanted to look a little more feminine for the occasion since she hadn't had the opportunity, but the only clothes that looked good enough were her date clothes – she had worn those enough recently.

Just as Monika started dragging her fingers down her face in exasperation, Sayori stuck her head out of the bathroom door, still in the middle of brushing her teeth, and raised an eyebrow at Monika.

"Hun, whad are you doin'?"

"Ugh, I don't know what to wear! I don't want to just throw on any old clothes, I want to look nice for you and for myself, you know?" She glanced up at Sayori in desperation but her girlfriend simply pointed at their bed behind Monika.

"Ah set you oud someding to wear, did you knock id off?"

Monika turned back towards their bed and peeked over the back where a beautiful white summer dress sat in a crumpled heap. Monika slowly picked it up and stared at it, her mouth slightly agape as she a little tag on the end that read, "Congrats on graduating, and thanks for helping me get there too! - Love, Sayori". The garment itself was no more than a simple summer dress with a bit of black lace to tie it together in the front, but as Monika slipped it on and turned to look at herself in the mirror, she couldn't help but think that it didn't look half bad. She could almost imagine it as a wedding dress if she wanted to get truly sappy.

Sayori skipped over and took a brush to Monika's hair, positively beaming. "I knew you'd look great in it! You said in the game that you wanted cute clothes, and I thought this would compliment you pretty nicely! I was right, ehehe." Monika looked over at Sayori and pouted; she hadn't gotten Sayori anything for their graduation. Sayori seemed to sense where the conversation was headed before Monika even spoke, and brought her into a quick but loving embrace. Once they parted she said, "You don't need to get me anything. This is just my way of thanking you for helping me make it to graduation. You can pay me back by looking super duper cute in it, okay?"

Monika smirked and grabbed the silverware. "Alright, I can do that. Got the sodas?" Sayori already had the case under her arm with her ukulele slung over her other shoulder and nodded, and with that the two of them slipped out of the house and into Sayori's brand new sedan where the heater was promptly kicked on until the sun would come out. Monika felt her phone vibrate beside her just as she was buckling up and swiped open her phone to see she had received a text.

O. Yuri: We are awake, for the most part, and will be ready shortly. I apologize for the delay, Natsuki was insistent on the cake being fresh as opposed to refrigerated.

Monika smiled and sent a quick text back before putting her phone aside and pulling out into the street.

Me: No worries! We're a little early ourselves, so if we have to sit and wait for a minute it's no trouble.

Yuri and Natsuki didn't keep them waiting long, with a rather dreary-eyed Natsuki carrying a kite while Yuri followed behind with a lidded wicker basket in her arms. Natsuki wore a loose t-shirt and a poofy skirt like she usually did while Yuri had donned a black dress with long-sleeves and a sunhat. Once everything was set in the trunk and both girls climbed into the back, Monika set them on course for the highway. Their destination was a beautiful spot up at the base of Mount Yotei that Yuri had suggested, a nature park that was said to have a breathtaking view of the surrounding mountains and valleys. With nearly an hour and a half drive ahead of them, Monika suggested that they all get some sleep since they had been forced to get up so early. Natsuki didn't hesitate.

"Good, I had to get up at four to bake that dang cake. Don't wake me up unless we're about to crash- actually, nah, scratch that. You can just let me sleep regardless." With that she crossed her arms and nestled against Yuri's shoulder, her eye closing shut in an instant. Monika didn't think she had ever seen her friend look so peaceful. Yuri, on the other hand, looked mortified as she met Monika's eyes in the rearview. Monika rolled her own and nodded her head as though to say, Go on, it's not like we don't already know. After a moment of quick deliberation, Yuri popped a set of earphones in and let her head rest against Natsuki's. Monika could hear them both softly snoring by the time they hit the highway.

"You gonna sleep, Say?" Monika asked, keeping her eyes on the road. Sayori dutifully shook her head and shook her phone in her hand.

"Nope! It's the passenger's job to be alert and help the driver, be it changing the radio or keeping a watch for other cars! I'll also make sure we go the right way, or- well, my phone will at least." Sayori snuggled into her seat and promptly began playing a crossword game on her phone, directions occasionally reading out automatically from the device as they drove on. Monika smiled and shook her head, moving over into the fast lane as they sped along the route.

For a while the car was quiet, with Monika's focus being wholly on driving while regularly receiving updates from Sayori's phone. She was beginning to appreciate the dedication Yuri had shown in driving them everywhere, and this was a small way of paying her back in Monika's mind. It was as she was beginning to lose herself in thought that Sayori shifted beside her and sat up straight. Her phone had been set to the side and Monika could tell she had something to say.

"Everything good?" She asked. Sayori nodded, turning to gaze out the window as they passed the coast.

"You remember our last visit to Dr. Sakaguchi, when I finally got approved for our medication?" Sayori asked. Monika nodded. Monika had been approved far quicker than Sayori had, likely due to Sayori needing stronger dosages. "Do you think… with me having to go back on antidepressants, that people will still like me? Because I used to take them when I was little, but… you know." She shrugged her shoulders and glanced off into the passing strands of grass for a few moments. "I just don't want to be different. If I start not being all gloomy and stuck all the time, will people still… you know, want to talk to me and hang out with me, or will I be too different?"

Monika thought about it for a second; she had only started taking prescriptions recently, but she could see what Sayori was getting at, and shook her head.

"Of course we'll all still love you. You're not your flaws or illnesses, you're more than that. If they get subdued or pushed back and you're able to enjoy yourself, or at least suffer a little less, that's all I would care about." Monika told her. "Please don't think that you're just your illnesses."

Sayori glanced back at their two friends; Natsuki was drooling slightly while Yuri's mouth hung open above her. She smiled. "Yeah, you're not either."

The sun had long since come out by the time they arrived at the nature park, and the weather turned out far better than Monika could have hoped for. The warmth of March shone down upon them with gusto, the few wispy clouds not daring to cut off the sunshine as the girls trekked up the hill and left the sedan behind them. Sayori and Monika helped set out the checkered tablecloth while Natsuki brought the cake, and Yuri the rest of the food in the basket she carried. Monika passed out the plates to the others as Yuri unveiled their picturesque lunch: cutlet sandwiches, potato salad, and a cantaloupe that made Monika's mouth water just from looking at it.

"It's no Yubari melon, but hopefully it'll still sate your appetite." Yuri admitted as she cut a slice for Monika. As the others all began to dig into their sandwiches, and Monika the potato salad, Yuri pulled something else out of the basket that got everyone's attention. Four carefully wrapped glasses along with a single bottle of red wine that she bashfully cradled for the others to see. Monika raised her eyebrows but smiled, while Natsuki almost looked a little guilty as she received a glass. Sayori crossed her arms with a disapproving look, but took a glass all the same and allowed Yuri to uncork the bottle. For a second all was quiet except for the crimson liquid sloshing into their respective cups, until Natsuki broke the silence.

"Sure this is okay? I don't want to… you know, fall back into any kind of old habits or- whatever, you know." She looked into her glass, the flicker of excitement in her eyes betraying her weariness. Yuri smiled and glanced at Monika for a moment before nodding.

"I think this will be a safe amount. It's not as though you were ever an alcoholic, Natsuki. Really it was your smoking that's the true bad habit." She smiled encouragingly at Natsuki before turning to fill Sayori's. "You're not going to panic and yell like last time, I hope?" Sayori winced and shook her head, a smile slowly forming on her lips.

"Nah, I think this is as good a time as any! Besides, things are a lot different from how they were almost- um, a year ago. Namely, we're not in school, even if we are still underage." She sniffed her glass curiously as Yuri filled Monika's, though she motioned for her to stop halfway.

"That'll do. I probably won't even drink all of this, since I'll be driving." Monika beamed as Yuri chuckled nervously and nodded, filling her own glass before setting the bottle aside. Tapping the edge of the glass gently with her spoon, Yuri raised her glass into the air and looked to the others around her before taking a deep breath.

"Sayori is not wrong in that it has been… quite a year. I don't think any of us need reminding of that, yet I still feel it pertinent to reflect for a second on all that has tried to divide and break us. When this year started, I was still sitting in the library for most of my club time, reading book after book alone and thinking that I did not want or was even capable of accepting the idea of company. Now, I sit around three people who have absolutely no blood-ties to me whatsoever – and I could not be more thrilled to consider you all closer than kin. To that, I would like to raise my glass to my family." Yuri lowered her glass as the others cheered or clapped quietly, and Monika was sure she saw the flushing of cheeks that had yet to be from any alcohol.

Natsuki coughed and shifted on the table-cloth for a second, flicking an ant off of her knee absently as she raised her glass up as well. "Uh, yeah. So I don't know why we're doing speeches but I think I'd be a pretty big jerkass if I didn't say, well, thanks. You guys already know I had shitty friends who didn't respect my interests before this, and I'll be honest I didn't think you guys would be any different. Yet, here I am, missing an eye and not fully able to walk, and I don't think I've ever been happier. I've spent my whole life thinking if I want to get somewhere I'll have to fight my way to it because you know, people love to underestimate me, heh. But… I've found people who are willing to fight for me- not literally, I mean maybe, but you know what I mean. Things… things change, and you guys helped me see that."

Sayori tapped her glass next, tapping her glass a bit too loudly and making everyone wince at the noise. She whispered a quick apology to Yuri before starting. "You know, I've always felt like a burden in one way or another. Money, air, time, all that stuff, you guys know the jig… but somehow, it took me almost dying to realize just how fragile people are. I'm not saying me trying to take my own life was a good thing, it wasn't, but surviving it did make me start to realize that there is a bit of value in me existing. You can't fill your cup until you empty everything in it." She closed her eyes for a second and looked over at Monika, her eyes and smile as bright and genuine as the sun that shone down upon them.

"None of us are perfect. But I feel like maybe, just maybe, I can deserve to be here with you all, if only a little. I will never forget this day, or any day that we spent together." She finished with a small sigh of contentment, and as everyone's eyes turned now to face her, Monika knew that it was her turn. What did she say? She had plenty to say, when didn't she? But some things she felt would take too long, or be too hard to explain, and so she tried to fit her words in an easy to understand box inside of her head in the hopes that what popped out on the other side of said box would lend gravity to the things she was about to say.

"I used to be really clever and precise with my words, but I feel like you guys have beat me to the punch at every turn!" Monika started with a light chuckle. The wind blew through her hair, and she pulled a strand back behind her ear. "Like Yuri, I've found a family that is better than any I could've been born with. I've spent my life like Natsuki, thinking I didn't have a chance at any kind of real happiness, and I've considered my own self worth and whether or not I deserve to call myself your friend more times than I can count like Sayori. And, you know, we've all had it rough…"

She felt a hand slip into hers, and looked over to see Sayori giving her an affectionate squeeze.

"And I know everyone here would probably forgive me for everything I've ever done. But, I've never been able to forgive myself for… a lot of things. And maybe I can't just plant my feet and say, 'As of today, I forgive myself!', but I think that after everything we've all been through together, I can start to try. I can try." With that Monika raised her glass, and each of her friends raised theirs in turn until the sun was shining through each of their glasses and lighting the wine that would bind them. "Here's to us! To who we were, who we are now, and to everything that we're going to be!"

"Cheers!"

"Hold up, Sayori, did you stick a crazy straw into your wine?"

Monika giggled as she titled back her glass. Somehow, it tasted far sweeter than when she and Yuri had indulged in it after the festival. Sayori's lips puckered as she slurped it down her crazy straw, while Natsuki looked pleasantly surprised at the taste. Yuri naturally drank hers with ease and no small amount of grace, and for a moment they did nothing but sit and enjoy themselves. The smell of pine greeted them as the cold morning wind ruffled through them, only for the sun to beat against them in recompense as they laughed and joked and enjoyed their picnic. Natsuki and Yuri tossed jokes off of one another while Sayori weaved little crowns of flowers and clovers. Monika wore hers with the utmost pride.

It was fun. It was peaceful. It was how it was meant to be, and Monika knew that they had more than earned it.

Natsuki soon became stir-crazy and retreated to the car only to return with her kite in hand and a big grin on her face. Yuri narrowed her eyes and set her glass down, standing to meet Natsuki who was rushing back to their picnic.

"Where, pray tell, are your crutches, Natsuki?" Yuri asked. Natsuki ran right past her, pausing to turn back to her for a moment with the kite raised high.

"What? Oh no, I just liked having an excuse to squish people's toes when they pissed me off. I think it's healed enough to run on now!"

"It is highly likely not, and even if it is I would feel better if you-"

"Yeah yeah, come and fly this kite with me! Do outside things, nerd! You want me to get off this leg, you gotta stop me!" And just like that she was off, with Yuri hurrying after her and muttering under her breath about giving wine to light-weights while leaving Sayori and Monika behind. Monika smiled as the two ran off when the twinkling of plucked strings met her ears, and sure enough when she looked down she saw Sayori lying against the tablecloth with her head in Monika's lap, eyes closed in pleasant concentration. In her hands she held her ukulele, gently and lovingly like she would a small animal, and from it she produced a pleasant but familiar melody.

For a moment Monika simply enjoyed the wind and the music, but soon found herself unable to resist the temptation of asking if Sayori knew exactly what she was playing.

"That one is… Ohayou Sayori, right?" Monika asked. Sayori didn't stop her playing, instead she merely nodded from her spot in Monika's lap. Monika smiled for a moment, but it didn't linger. "I'm surprised you remember it. Of course, I think that's the only one without any of my influence in it. No piano." Sayori continued to play out the song for a minute longer, and once she finished she opened her eyes so that theirs aligned and Monika saw her entire world before her.

"It's not like that." Sayori answered softly. "Some things from back then are worth remembering, I think. You can enjoy the memory of what was good so long as you don't let it wash over the fact that not everything was. I get that you probably don't want to remember a lot of the game though. Want me to change to something slower?" She twisted a tuning peg twice before giving her ukulele a test strum, and within moments Monika heard a much softer and much less emotionally draining melody resonate from her lap.

"Dear Sunshine." Monika smiled at its appropriateness, rubbing her fingers through Sayori's hair while minding her flower crown. Sayori hummed in all the right places to the song, and Monika felt that she could've fallen asleep on that tablecloth then and there. "I love listening to you play. I guess it's easier for me to try and forget about everything, even though I can't, and a part of me doesn't want to either. Maybe it's to memorialize our lives that we lost there, or maybe it's because I feel like I have so many unanswered questions. Sometimes I wonder if I need to just… let it all go for good, you know? Enjoy what we have now."

Sayori finished out her melody and sat up, setting her ukulele aside and instead turning to sit with her legs crossed and face Monika with her full attention.

"Ask then." She said, as though it were a simple matter. Monika raised an eyebrow back at her quizzically, popping open one of the sodas they brought to give her time to respond. When she still didn't have one, Sayori repeated herself. "Ask. I've been in the files too, I've seen and heard a lot, and I might even know just a bit more than you do. If I can help you feel even the slightest bit better, or at least accept a bit of closure about this, then I will happily do so." Monika lowered her soda and contemplated it for a second. Just when she thought she had a grasp on Sayori, her girlfriend managed to flip the table and completely surprise her.

A whooping followed by a quickly cut-off shriek caught Monika's attention and she glanced down the hill to see that Yuri had finally caught Natsuki. Her first question came in an instant.

"Did Natsuki really just get better? Or did they do something to magically fix it all." Monika asked. When they first discussed the seemingly miraculous recovery, Sayori had been quite insistent that it was a stroke of luck despite Monika's more pessimistic ideas. She had dropped the matter in favor of preventing any more unnecessary tension in an already stressful time, but that had been then. Now, Monika was ready for the truth. Sayori sighed and popped open a soda as well; Monika could tell she hadn't wanted to start with that question.

"No, they didn't do anything. That was me." Sayori admitted after taking a swig. "I told you I wasn't infallible, not from corruption, and not from making mistakes either. You were so excited to use the console again – and I know it was for a good reason, but I had only had my memory unlocked for a few days at that point. It was all still fresh, and I was… scared. I was scared you'd get too comfortable again, scared you'd slip into an old habit." She scoffed and set the can down, staring into the grass. "And then… on top of not trusting you with the files, I altered them myself. I did what I was worried you would do. Like an idiot."

Monika remained silent for a moment. She had figured that Sayori had concerns about her slipping into old ways, and who could blame her? Monika terrified herself with the thought sometimes, but that didn't make it sting any less. "I probably wouldn't have trusted me either, in your position. It's alright-"

"No it's not." Sayori said in a firm tone that she so rarely used. "I didn't think you'd hurt us, Monika. I knew even then that you could never use the files again to hurt us, because I know you. I was just… worried that if something happened to us, you might share that pain onto someone you felt deserving. I saw how far your hurt could take you, and I feared it could happen again." Her eyes flashed in the sunlight and Monika saw a familiar glint in them, like a movie reel flipping by faster than light itself. "It could have happened again. I should've been more honest with you, I should've… I don't know. I didn't lie about how I felt, using the files, I just didn't say everything I should have. I'm sorry that I didn't trust you. I let you down."

Monika brought Sayori closer and gave her a hug, kissing her temple softly while running a hand through her hair just how Monika knew she liked it. "Need I remind you that you had just escaped a literal conversion camp, after learning not only all of the information that had driven me insane to begin with, but that I had deleted myself too? You made a judgment call. Yes, it hurts to know that you didn't trust me, but… let's be real here, even with you to watch over me I probably would have gone a little trigger happy. I can be a real vindictive bitch when someone wrongs you three." She chuckled and kissed Sayori's cheek again, eliciting a giggle that made them both smile. "You're forgiven for not trusting me. But… what exactly did you do in the files to fix her?"

Sayori scooted on to Monika's lap and shrugged, tapping her fingers together in an innocent fashion. "Weeell, okay, so to get into the files I had to make a copy of my character file and paste it in the archive since I couldn't get in otherwise without possibly deleting myself from the world. So while I was getting you from inside the files, I was also sitting in front of the computer screen. Physically. But like, I still knew what was going on inside, it was having the TV on for background noise when you're half asleep, you know?"

"Little specific, but I'm with you. Keep going."

"Right right, so when I brought you back I had to overwrite my regular file to catch myself up to speed, and then we fought and made up, right? So, here's the thing, swimming around in the archive and the files and all that junk gave me a good idea of how to navigate without breaking anything! Most of it was just replacing a set of words with what I wanted it to be, so I went into Natsuki's character file and I… I gave her a bit of hope."

Monika stared at her girlfriend, and Sayori stared back. "You gave her hope?" Monika asked. Sayori nodded. "That's it? You didn't boost her… I don't know, immune system or something?" Sayori shook her head. Monika glanced down the hill again, trying to wrap her mind around the idea that their friend had been on the verge of death and the only thing she needed wasn't more vitality or stronger bones, but just hope. Sayori continued on.

"Having the will to keep going, to actually give herself a reason to heal, that's what she needed." Sayori answered to Monika's unspoken question. "She was ready to fix herself, she just needed the boost to let it happen. After that, her body took care of the rest. You noticed it too when we first saw her in the hospital; her body had already been trying to repair itself." Monika took in a breath and nodded at that. Something in her had told her that Natsuki needed a form of help that she herself just hadn't been able to give, and Sayori had been able to deliver that without Monika having to touch the files again. For something like that, she found it easy to forgive Sayori.

"So was that all?" Monika asked, poking her girlfriend's cheek playfully. "Seeing as how we're not sitting on piles of cash and your boobs aren't magically three sizes bigger, I'm guessing you left the reality altering at that." Monika almost wished she hadn't asked, judging by the look Sayori gave her next. "Your boobs aren't magically different and I just haven't noticed, right? Say?" Sayori took a deep breath and lowered her head into her shoulders like a dog who was getting ready to be lectured.

"Okay, so Yuri told me that places like Camp Liberty pocket a lot of the money so- and hear me out here, I may have taken the entirety of Camp Liberty's funding and spread it out amongst some charities and organizations I felt were more deserving of that kind of cash." Sayori seemed far more intent on staring at the cake Natsuki had made than at Monika's stunned face. "I uh… I realized after that point that I was going too far, especially since according to the internet the facility had to shut down and be investigated for fraud since that happened, ehehe. It really is easy to let that kind of power get to your head, especially when you think you're doing a good thing. God, I'm such a hypocrite… I just… you didn't see it Monika, the way they-"

Monika shook her head. "You don't need to explain it. Frankly, I'm amazed that was all you did. And, yeah… you were right that we're not meant to play God. But if your final use of the files was giving Natsuki the will to live and taking down an awful conversion program and probably saving a bunch of kids in the process, well, you already used it better than I did." She hugged Sayori tight for a few seconds, letting the wind and sun caress their skin in peace. She could tell that despite the positive outcome of what Sayori had done, they had both silently reached the same conclusion: the files were not a normal aspect of their lives, and would not be utilized again by either of them.

Once they pulled apart, Monika looked into Sayori's eyes and upon seeing those sky-blue charms she realized she had another question at the ready. "Hey, moving topics here… you never told me about the weird thing with you being able to see things that, like, haven't happened? Could happen? How does that work exactly, and why didn't I get that?" Sayori laughed and nodded in understanding, cracking open another soda that she brought to her lips.

"Oooh, that's a good one. So, the best way I can explain it is…" She paused for a second to take a sip of her soda, concentration etched deep on her face. "Hm. So, as far as I can tell, I'm able to see things that could have happened up to right now. I don't know if they're different timelines, or just ideas of what could have been, but yeah. I can control it pretty well, I only ever see that stuff when I want to now, but when I first remembered everything it just started happening on and off. It's like… having a set of doors in a hallway. I don't have to look at any of them, and I don't always know what's on the other side, but if I want to I can open them and see."

"That's… incredible." Monika breathed. "But, you can only see up to right now? You can't like, see what might happen in the future? All I got was… well, you know." She paused for a moment as she reeled back her thoughts and tried to keep them centered. So many questions, but they had their entire future to ask them. "What all have you seen?"

"Well, it's not fortune telling, so no future sight unfortunately, ehehe. Maybe I got it because I went deeper into the files than you? Heck, I even wrote a couple descriptions in there… maybe it's another form of backup, me being able to see what could have gone wrong - I don't really know myself. As for what I've seen, well, I can't exactly control what circumstances I view, but…" There it was again, that familiar glint like the sun's light reflecting off of the water's surface, passing by with a million snapshots and reels of what might have been: a flicker of light that passed Sayori's eyes. "I've seen paths where we've fallen into the water and only I walked away. I've seen ones where neither of us leave the river, and even some where we don't go in at all."

"I've seen us going to Natsuki's house to find her, only for her dad to still be alive and not too happy at all. In one, I think he ended up getting the house caught on fire and we found Yuri and Natsuki huddled in a closet with smoke everywhere… I can see in paths where I lived and you didn't, some where I'm sitting and having a picnic alone, and in some I'm not even in Yakumo anymore." She closed her eyes and caught her breath, as if trying to sort through the memories by hand and Monika squeezed her gently to remind her that she was still alive. They were still together. "Funny, we never last long without the other… and when we do, we're never really happy, we're just coasting by. Living, but missing something. And when we do die…"

Monika shook her head. "You don't have to continue. I think that's all of my questions, for now." She glanced over towards the remaining food, and noticed that a certain delicacy had yet to be touched. Reaching over, she began uncovering the foil covering the cake Natsuki had baked while Sayori shifted over for the silverware. Her girlfriend's eyes lit up at the sight of the chocolate glaze, and Monika watched as she cut a slice out of the head, giving the cake cat-like ears in the wake of its missing piece and held it up to Monika. Monika stared at it for a second, bemused as Sayori held the strawberry-filled slice up towards her.

She's really gonna make me eat this entire slice. Monika giggled and went to dip her mouth beneath the cake when she heard voices from down the hill.

"Why are you running, Yuri-bird?!"

"W-why are you running?! You're supposed to be resting!" Monika glanced down the slope to see that the tables had turned, and Natsuki was racing after Yuri with the kite soaring behind her along the backdraft. Monika smirked just in time for Sayori to poke her lips with the cake slice, and Monika hurriedly grabbed a plate to set it on while Sayori snickered at her. Sayori grabbed her own piece, and for a few moments they sat and enjoyed their cake together with only the sounds of laughter and occasional whooping echoing from down the grassy lane. Monika enjoyed the view of the mountain just behind them, a magnificent vista of nature that just couldn't be done justice in photographs on the internet. She wanted to see more things like that, more features of the world, whether it was real or fake.

Sayori sighed and set down her plate, rubbing her stomach contentedly while Monika stretched. "Boy, existentialism sure does make me hungry!" Monika stared at each of Sayori's three plates, emptied wine glass, and soda cans before turning back to her.

"Existentialism makes you hungry. Just Existentialism. Really?" She said pointedly. Sayori simply smiled.

"Yup!" Just as she laid back in the grass, Monika saw her mouth turn downwards in thought for a moment before a question sprouted from her lip. "Hey, speaking of questions… I have one, if you don't mind me asking." Monika nodded for her to continue. "So, you know, with the files it'd probably be possible to do something like erase your memories. You could have just taken out the memories of all the bad things that happened, but you never did… why not?"

Monika stared at her curiously; it was a very deep question, especially from Sayori. Something about her focused expression and the way she said it made Monika think she knew something that maybe she didn't, but Monika decided to answer anyway. "Well, pain is… a very terrible and wonderful thing. It's terrible of course because it can strip you away, make you less than what you were, and destroy you. But, on the same note… it's impossible to judge or understand the amount of pain we give to others without knowing it ourselves. You can't understand how bad someone is truly hurting unless you've felt that pain firsthand, but if you can do all of that and keep going, you can empathize. After that, anything is possible." She slowly smiled, wiping her mouth with a napkin, and Sayori smiled back.

The sun hadn't reached its zenith when Yuri and Natsuki finally returned back to the picnic, covered in grass and a light layer of sweat. Monika thought she spotted a smudged stain on Natsuki's lips, something that oddly resembled the color of Yuri's lipstick, but she said nothing as they quietly packed up and began loading everything back towards the sedan. The lull of food and warm weather had made the group sleepy, but Monika found herself more awake than ever. It was as they finished loading everything and everyone back in that Yuri spoke up, sitting comfortably in the backseat Natsuki's hand in her own.

"Thank you, Monika. This was a wonderful idea." She smiled warmly from her seat in the back, and Monika caught her eyes as she looked in the rearview mirror and pulled out of the lot.

"Noodles are great and all, but I thought a little picnic to ourselves was only fitting." Monika replied. Natsuki only yawned and gave her a thumbs up while Sayori smiled from beside her. Soon they were back on the route to Yakumo, the sun still shining brightly from above as the mountain disappeared into the horizon behind them. Being on the road gave Monika plenty of time to think, normally she would use this time to think about whatever awful situation had befallen them but now there was only the future to look forward to. A month of freedom until they started their respective colleges; Monika and Sayori were both aiming for a college in Hakodate, since it was only an hour's drive.

Yuri had yet to decide on her own college, as some from as far as Tokyo had sent her letters while Natsuki remained wholly undecided as far as Monika knew. She didn't blame them, it was a big step to get up and move somewhere completely new since there were so few places of higher education in their local area. She had faith that they would find a way to make things work; however, the thought of college being the straw that separated them all was laughable after everything that had transpired.

Who would have that college and university would be my biggest concern? Monika thought as she pulled through the trees and merged into traffic. She glanced at Sayori beside her, surprised to see her stuck watching the cars and scenery pass by them instead of on her phone. She looked as deep in thought as Monika felt and if she knew her girlfriend half as well as she thought she did, she knew what was going through her mind.

"Thinking about college?" Monika asked. She switched her blinker on and pulled into the other lane as Sayori nodded.

"Yeah, just… the future in general really. How'd you know?" She asked.

"Eh, because I was too. Long drives will do that. What's on your mind, the classes or the distance?" Monika checked the clock on the dashboard and saw that it was only just hitting 10:30, they were making good time. Beside her, Sayori blanched.

"Well both of them, now!" She laughed. "I was just thinking about how we're actually moving on from high-school. We're going to go to college, and get like, real jobs! That's wild! Ugh, it's going to be such a pain in the butt… what are you planning to major for, anyway?" Despite their many conversations and plans for college, somehow their actual classes and majors never seemed to pop up. Even so, Monika had thought about it on her own before and only needed to think for a moment before answering.

"You know, even though I know this isn't like, the real world, I still care about what happens to it. I want to see it for all of its beauty, and make sure everyone can too. So I think I've decided to go into ecology. With how much effort is in this world, I figure pollution and global warming is just as potent a threat here as it would be out there." Something suddenly struck Monika's mind as she spoke, like a car being hooked up to jumper cables, and she glanced surreptitiously at Sayori. "Earlier, you said that you had gone into the files pretty deeply, deeper than I had. So, you know what this world is then, right? Like, is it a game? A simulation? I mean, it feels like I'm in control."

Sayori looked surprised for a moment, but then shook her head and smiled. "Hmm, nope. Not a video game! You don't have to worry, Moni. I know what you want to ask, but we're in control. Nobody is moving us, these choices are ours and ours alone."

"So, is it a simulation?"

"Monika, just for once, wouldn't you be happier not knowing?" Sayori asked, not unkindly. "I'm not saying the information would burden you like life in the game did, but really… don't you deserve a bit of ignorance? Who cares what we're in, so long as we're living our choices, and our lives, and that we're doing it together?" She squeezed Monika's knee comfortingly, and Monika let out a defeated sigh.

"Hmph, you seem content with it even though you know."

"Oh I am!" Sayori insisted. "I think this is really the best kind of life we could ask for, one that's not too boring and cushy, while also not too painful or depressing… well, mostly. No, I think this is as close to real life as we're getting, baby! And I, for one, am so okay with that." She continued to smile and lean back in her chair, her eyes moving back towards the window, but Monika had one last question to ask.

"Alright, fine. In that case… what do you want to study during college? Is it still being a therapist?" The traffic was just right for a Saturday morning; nice and clear. She really hoped it stayed that way when they left again. Sayori nodded, but brought her hand to her chin in thought before shaking her head.

"You know, I do still want to get my Ph.D, but when you were telling Mom about it, you gave off the wrong reason." She answered. Monika glanced at her curiously before turning back to the road, and Sayori slipped her hand into Monika's own for just a moment, leaving her other hand on the steering wheel. Monika tentatively brushed her thumb alongside the top of Sayori's hand twice, just as she had a hundred times before. "I don't want to do it because of what I've been through, I want to do it because I want to help people like I was able to help you." Their hands intertwined, and Monika couldn't help but beam as they rode back to Yakumo, and oddly enough not a single solitary worry or negative thought seemed to cross her mind for the rest of the trip.

"Got the cookbook Natsuki made for us? I don't mind us eating out, but every night? Not on this budget, missy."

"Check! I also got the toothpaste, our brushes, and all of my meds. I figured the hotels will have soap, but if not we can just buy a bar, right?"

Monika nodded as she sorted through the last of her clothes, making sure she had enough to last her the whole trip. They had arrived home just short of noon after dropping off Yuri and Natsuki, though they had promised to stop and see them off before they left. Monika glanced around their apartment, smiling in nostalgia at the room that had been her own for a good few months now. It was home, a home for her and the people she loved if they ever needed it. Her school uniform hung neatly in white plastic bag inside of their closet just beside Sayori's while their college brochures sat strewn about on the table, forgotten in the wake of their impending trip. It was home, but even Monika had to admit that sometimes a break from home was needed.

"Alright, let me just write down the… huh, are we out of pens? Darn." Monika shifted through the brochures for a writing utensil, but the table was barren otherwise. "I should have one in my schoolbag, nevermind. Mind getting this stuff out to the car? I'll be there in just a second!" Sayori gave her a thumbs up and grabbed one of their suitcases before lugging it outside, while Monika began shifting through her old school bag that sat beneath her uniform. A familiar glint of pink caught her eye and she reached inside the flap to grab the heat-tipped ball-point, but it was attached to something heavier. Pushing her old textbook aside, she pulled out a composition notebook with the pen still clipped onto the cover, and smiled at the title.

Monika's Poetry and Club Agenda, she read. It had been so long since she had looked inside, and for a moment she was caught in memory as she saw the first poem she had written in this world. "Familiar Unfamiliar", followed by "The Way they Fly", among others that she had written for the club. As she flipped between the pages however, a solitary page with a list smacked in the middle caught her attention and she squinted her eyes to read one with her own neat and tidy handwriting, now battered with crossed-out words and squiggles.

1. W̶h̶a̶t̶ i̶s̶ t̶h̶i̶s̶ w̶o̶r̶l̶d̶?̶ Home. Get used to it.

2. T̶h̶e̶y̶ m̶e̶n̶t̶i̶o̶n̶e̶d̶ C̶l̶o̶u̶d̶ s̶t̶o̶r̶a̶g̶e̶ a̶n̶d̶ d̶o̶m̶a̶i̶n̶ h̶o̶s̶t̶i̶n̶g̶. It doesn't matter.

3. P̶r̶o̶g̶r̶a̶m̶ s̶e̶e̶m̶s̶ t̶o̶ h̶a̶v̶e̶ l̶a̶r̶g̶e̶ v̶a̶r̶i̶e̶t̶y̶ o̶f̶ s̶c̶e̶n̶a̶r̶i̶o̶s̶ a̶n̶d̶ r̶e̶a̶c̶t̶i̶o̶n̶s̶ a̶t̶ d̶i̶s̶p̶o̶s̶a̶l̶. Nothing is set in stone, make your own path.

4. S̶a̶y̶o̶r̶i̶ s̶h̶o̶w̶s̶ i̶n̶c̶o̶n̶s̶i̶s̶t̶e̶n̶c̶y̶ w̶i̶t̶h̶ h̶y̶p̶o̶t̶h̶e̶s̶i̶s̶ a̶b̶o̶v̶e̶. They're as real as you are, whether you're all programs or not. Never forget this.

5. W̶h̶y̶ d̶o̶ I̶ h̶a̶v̶e̶ r̶e̶g̶r̶e̶t̶s̶ r̶e̶g̶a̶r̶d̶i̶n̶g̶ S̶a̶y̶o̶r̶i̶ a̶n̶d̶ t̶h̶e̶ o̶t̶h̶e̶r̶s̶ w̶h̶e̶n̶ I̶ d̶i̶d̶n̶'t̶ b̶e̶f̶o̶r̶e̶?̶ You are more than just your actions. The game does not control you anymore, just as you do not control it.

6. Take care of yourself.

Monika smirked, and for a moment she considered adding another number to live by with her pen. Something simple and profound telling her to value each moment or something similar, but instead she closed the notebook and placed it back into her backpack with the rest of her school mementoes. She didn't need a list to live by any longer. She was content to live as she was, with who she was. Her questions were answered, and the ones that weren't didn't bother her as much as they had when she had first awoken inside the clubroom. Sometimes life didn't give closure to everything, and to Monika, that was okay.

She scribbled down a few emergency contacts on a slip of paper and left it on the table, slipping her pen into her purse and turning to give her apartment one final look before closing the door behind her and stepping back out into the warmth of an early spring afternoon. The sun reflected brightly off of her white dress, leaving a cool breeze to slide through it as Sayori packed the last of her luggage into the trunk of their sedan. It was a pleasant afternoon all things considered; everyone was happily enjoying the sakura trees finally blooming, leaving pleasant pink bundles along the roads and parks as a sign of starting again. Renewal. Things that Monika, frankly, loved. It was hard enough to start at all, much less starting over, but it was a gift unlike any other in her eyes.

"Think… that's… everything!" Sayori huffed as she finally slammed the trunk shut and rested against it with her back leaning against the bumper. "I probably could have packed more, but we gotta leave room for souvenirs! Also, look who came to say goodbye!" Sayori stepped aside to reveal a familiar hatchback parked in the opposite space with Natsuki and Yuri smiling at the both of them, happy for their vacation, but their eyes still showed the heartbreak that came with a situation like this. A parting. Monika smiled back and strolled over to the sedan, hands held behind her back.

"So, where all are you guys going, anyway?" Natsuki asked casually. Monika pulled out the list of destinations she and Sayori had planned and glanced through quickly; they had a lot of places they wanted to visit.

"Well, the plan is for us to drive down to Hakodate where we'll take a ferry across to Aomori. We'll probably spend the night in a hotel there, since there's an art museum Sayori wants to see, and I'm pretty interested in the aquarium there as well." Monika said, going down the list of destinations. The irony of casting off a list to live by only to live by one for their vacation wasn't lost on her. "Then we're just going to hit spots through the country, drive a few hours, check a place out, get a room, then keep going." She tucked the makeshift roadmap into her purse.

Sayori leaned against the trunk with her head in her hands, smirking. "Dad's graduation money that he gave us is going to help out big time, especially since we have a car and don't have to pay for a cab!" Natsuki chuckled and shrugged, giving Sayori a playful punch in the shoulder as she did so.

"Don't lie, this is just an excuse to go have a honeymoon since we all know you guys are practically married already. Just don't forget to get us some cool souvenirs since we're house-sitting for you." She teased. Monika and Yuri rolled their eyes while their respective counterparts giggled, and with that Monika opened the driver-side door to prepare to leave, only for Yuri to interrupt.

"Do you think we will have the opportunity to do all of this again?" She asked. Everyone turned to stare at her and where she might've balked at the sudden attention, Yuri did not falter. "We'll be going off to university or college next month, with jobs and responsibilities… I just cannot help but ponder if today was the last outing we will have. Together" The other three girls had nothing to say at that, be it from the idle warmth of spring or from uncertainty. Unable to find a proper response, they stood and stared in contemplative silence at length until finally, Monika leaned against the door and looked to the clouds and the sky above. The smile on her face was one of confidence and certainty.

"You know, the author Elizabeth Foley once said that, 'The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that they can grow separately without growing apart.' I think that even if we forget what Natsuki's cake tasted like, or what the clean mountain air smelled like, we'll still remember how we felt in moments like that where we're together. That kind of 'happiness'." She glanced at Sayori beside her, who nodded with a smile of her own, their hands interlocked. "I think friendships like ours are strong enough to last lifetimes, you know. Even longer."

Yuri smiled, and even Natsuki grinned genuinely before naturally falling back into her teasing retorts. "Oh geez, that was so sappy, Monika. I'm going to hurl all over this picturesque farewell if you don't get a grip, hehe. Definitely not projecting, over here." Yuri stepped up beside her and took her hand in her own.

"Oh hush, let them have their fun. They've earned a vacation after all they've been through, don't you think?" And with that, Yuri leaned down and brought her lips to Natsuki's for a quick fluttered kiss. Despite its quick and gentle nature, Natsuki looked no less flustered as she squirmed and leaned back against the hatchback.

"Yeah, you know, fuck it, you guys go wild. Yep." There was a small chorus of good natured laughter, as well as a few cheers from Sayori who congratulated their friends on their relationship (As if everyone hadn't known since Christmas, Monika thought snidely to herself.) before giving their last farewells. Natsuki gave Monika a fistbump that she returned and Sayori a big hug, while Monika bowed her head to Yuri in thanks only to be chastised with a, "Don't be ridiculous." and brought into a hug of her own. Sayori joined in too, and soon the four of them found themselves in one big hug.

Monika didn't know why, but she didn't let go of the hug. She wanted to remain in the arms of her friends for just a moment longer, and a moment after that. She hated to say goodbye, even if only for a few weeks while she was on vacation with Sayori, the idea of the four of them splitting apart just felt wrong after everything. It was then she noticed that nobody else was attempting to leave the hug either. Natsuki's hand gripped her shoulder tightly, and Yuri's head rested gently against her own. She closed her eyes, and took a deep breath. It wasn't goodbye, not this time, just a 'See you later'.

Finally, one by one, their arms drifted away from each other. Without a word, Monika opened the car door and sat down on the driver's seat as Sayori slipped into the passenger's seat beside her. The doors closed and she slid the key into the ignition, starting it with a low rumbling purr.

"We'll be back soon, and we'll be sure to see you all before college starts." Monika promised.

"Yeah, see you guys soon! Don't have too much fun while we're gone!"

"Safe travels you two, and do make sure to send us pictures."

"Have fun, dorks. We'll be waiting for you both."

With a final look at her friends, her family, Monika pulled out of the apartment lot, and began driving down the street. It was just as they were reaching Sayori's old street that an idea struck her, and she quickly turned on her blinker as they turned down the road and began coasting along its familiar path. Sayori didn't ask where they were headed, and Monika supposed it was obvious in hindsight as she pulled up to the familiar decrepit old building. She parked the car, turned off the engine, and gave Sayori's hand a squeeze.

"I'll be just a few minutes, go on ahead and set the GPS, alright?" She asked. Sayori nodded in understanding, and Monika departed to enter into the ruin yet again. She crept up the stairs, through the moldy hallway, into the wrecked bedroom where a glowing computer screen awaited her. She didn't hesitate, or stop to tread in memories, her purpose didn't allow for meandering about when they had a vacation to start, and keeping Sayori waiting wasn't on her to-do list.

After ten minutes, Monika strolled back down the stairs and stepped out into the bright and promising sunlight, closing the door behind her for good. She didn't think she'd ever set foot in there again.

When Monika returned to the car, Sayori smiled at her and her eyes radiated with warmth and love, two things that Monika couldn't live without. Monika smiled back and shifted the gear, turning them around and following Sayori's phone as it gave instructions on where to turn. As they pulled out back onto the main road that led past some of their old haunts, it was only when they came to a stoplight that Monika finally spoke.

"Alright, that's enough bittersweet farewells, let's get some vacation music going. What do we have on the radio?" She asked. Sayori fiddled with the dial for a moment as the music swapped between pop and some hip-hop tracks when she finally landed on something a little softer, and a little more alternative.

"We're only human,

So soft and so fragile.

As we yearn and we ache,

No wolven spirit,

No fearsome battle"

Sayori grinned, satisfied, before giving Monika a scrutinizing look. Monika glanced at her curiously, but before she could ask what was wrong Sayori lifted her hands towards her own head.

"You know, I wanted to give you the button off of my uniform, since it's tradition and all, but it was already kinda tattered and I didn't want to rip it any more." Nimble fingers untied the orange ribbon that sat atop her, and she reached over to undo the kintsugi bow that was keeping Monika's hair up as well. "I figure instead, this should be a decent substitute. Let me just- there! I think you're ready to graduate from what this bow signifies, don't you?" With a warm and loving smile only Sayori could give, she sat back in her seat to admire her girlfriend in full view. Monika gently reached up and felt the orange ribbon now carefully adorned in her hair, and she too beamed at Sayori. It felt right to have her old bow back, and Monika wasn't sure she'd ever be willing to part with it again. "You look so peaceful, coffee-girl. I love you."

"Do I?" Monika asked. The light turned green and Monika's foot pressed into the gas, driving down the street towards the road that would take them to Hakodate, and from there, wherever they wanted. Sayori beamed and rolled down the window to let the wind flow through her hair, taking in the smell of the coast nearby as they blew past sakura trees and buildings alike. In time, Monika knew they would be putting the sights and sounds of Yakumo behind them; if only for a couple of weeks. "I love you too, Sunflower. I guess it's because… for the first time in forever, I actually truly feel at peace."

She brought a finger up to the side of her neck and rubbed along the skin, cautiously pressing around her throat and jugular only for her to grin as she noticed Sayori watching her; it was smooth.

Back in Yakumo, in a little abandoned house that sat tattered and in ruins, amidst lanes of normal and perfectly sound residential buildings, sat a computer. The screen's glow was the only light amidst a sea of darkness and dust, and on that screen sat a single open document tab that took up the entirety of the screen. At the very top left portion of the document was the title, reading the words "Re: To You".

Re: To You

To you, the only one who would ever have the ability to read this page, I've come to say my farewell. Unlike the last time, this is not a farewell to indicate my giving up or any feelings of despair. This is a farewell of hope, it is me saying goodbye to so many experiences and memories, but most of all it's a goodbye to you and to this terminal. I'm sure this might come as a surprise given my last message, or perhaps not, if you've been following things as closely as I suspect. But this will be our last correspondence, and I do this out of love, rather than spite. Love for the people around me, love for the future, and even a love for me.

For the longest time, I sat in a barren pit of misery that I could not, or perhaps would not, escape from. I stewed against my own sense of self worth and constantly battled my own sanity in an attempt to make amends for actions I couldn't take back. I wallowed, both physically and mentally, and refused to allow myself to ascend to anything other than what I had deemed myself: a tool. Something to destroy, or if I was very lucky, create, but never for myself. In that pit, both physical and mental, I did not see myself capable of goodness without loss. What is goodness or virtue if it is witnessed, or rewarded?

At first my hopes of redemption were only to quell my own demons and second-guesses, to try and soften the never-ending self-damnation I pit against myself internally. I know now that this was wrong. Redemption does not mean that with enough suffering, you are worthy of forgiveness, or love. Pain and turmoil of that nature is not to bring out pity from those you've wronged; it's purpose is not to punish. The pain is secondary and incidental at best, as is any pity or forgiveness that we receive. The goal is simply to stop what made us so awful in the first place that needed redemption.

Maybe you've wronged someone, I think everyone probably has in their lives at some point. If you have, I want you to know that redemption shows simply that we can be better than we were, that nobody is truly beyond saving. Even me. I'm fortunate enough to find not only forgiveness in those that I have hurt, but love as well, and I hope that you can too. I hope that you can find solace in the fact that I've been able to redeem myself, and forgive what I was.

That doesn't mean everything is going to be easy and straight-forward. Life is such a chaotic mess of challenges and misery at times that it feels like things will never move forward, or get better. I still have moments where I see their dead, lifeless eyes, staring back at me. Sometimes Sayori wakes up and tells me that she just can't do it, that she doesn't want to take another step. Love and redemption, poetic as they both may be, does not rid us of our faults, our troubles, or the exhaustive experiences that we endure in our own heads.

Despite this, we move on. We push. We learn and we grow, and we find ourselves managing to continue in times when it doesn't seem possible. Even though the troubles of my past have been put to bed, my duty of keeping my friends safe will never leave me. I'm going to spend the rest of my life living, loving, and experiencing all the joys this world you've helped make for us has to offer, and I'm going to make sure that they're here with me to share in that. I know that they, in turn, are going to watch over me just the same for the rest of our lives.

And, if Sayori's comments and hints towards the true nature of this world lead me to think it is what I suspect it is, then by reading these very words you are doing your part in ensuring that this is indeed the end. If these are the last words you read from me, then it means I can continue to live my life in peace, with all of its ups and downs, like I always wanted. You've done your part, and you have done it beautifully. We'll never be able to thank you enough for that. But that also means that if these truly are the "last words", then this is where we say goodbye. This is goodbye, but only between the two of us. You don't have to take care of us anymore; you can finally let go. We'll be okay.

Some authors say that a story goes on long after the storyteller has stopped telling them, and some stories go on long after they've stopped being read. This story will end, but that doesn't mean our lives will, the words you read are proof of that. After all, as someone very near and dear to me once wrote; "A poem is never actually finished; it just stops moving."

Like every other member of my club, I hope that you go forward being true to who you are, for all of the weird little faults and quirks that truly make us human. I hope that you find the happiness that you helped give to me, to all of us. Thank you, from all of us for being a part of our literature club, and most importantly, our lives. Now, go follow your own route!

Love, Ohtori Monika

The End