Archive of Our Own ^beta

They stayed together in the new world. If anyone asked, Sento would be happy to volunteer an explanation: Banjou was an idiot and a terrible liar, so leaving him to fend for himself in an unfamiliar world where another him existed would be a terrible idea. Sento, benevolent as he was, took Banjou under his wing. After all, what kind of hero would he be if he didn’t look after his sidekick?

That explanation would be completely true, of course, but it would also be utterly dishonest. A better answer might be that it was Sento who needed Banjou, the only person who remembered him and thus kept him tethered – he wasn’t supposed to exist in this new world, so what other reason would he have to stay once he’d made sure everyone else was fine? Without Banjou’s dogged insistence that he deserved to experience the future he’d worked so hard to create, he might have given in to the feeling that his life was part of the price he should pay to atone for all he’d done.

But perhaps the simplest and most honest reason was that Sento wanted to be with Banjou. In the old world, he’d tried his best to bury his growing attachment for the other man. It would be grossly unfair to push his feelings on Banjou when the man was still grieving Kasumi – moreso when her death was at the very least partly his fault – and they had more important things to worry about. No matter how he tried, though, he couldn’t keep himself from falling for Banjou further as they saved each other time and time again. His company could be loud and irritating, yes, but it had become a comfort Sento relied on to push forward, and he felt any prolonged absence of it sharply. In this new world… it still felt unfair to say anything when he was currently Banjou’s only real option. (Isn’t that a good thing?, a small, possessive part of him purred. The rest of him, keenly aware of how terrible it was to have one’s choices orchestrated by someone else, was appalled.) Regardless, he just wanted Banjou by his side, in any capacity.

It’d been a while since that initial desperate period of loneliness and confusion before they had found each other again. Somehow, despite their lack of legal identity or stable income, they managed to find a place to squat. It wasn’t much, but they didn’t need it to be; they’d gotten used to forgoing some creature comforts when they had bigger things to worry about.

In the old world, the building to which Vernage had moved Nascita had been abandoned at some point during the war - they hadn't technically needed to crowd into the basement to sleep, but they did anyway. Part of it was out of respect for the previous tenants, but part of it was simply a desire for closeness, a needed reminder that not all of the people who mattered were gone. It was only the two of them now, but they'd kept the habit of sleeping next to each other. Even if they went to bed with a polite distance between them, they’d inevitably tangle together at some point during the night. Neither of them would admit it, but the physical contact was a sorely needed reassurance when nightmares came calling (and if it sometimes resulted in more… pleasant dreams, they didn’t talk about those either).

It was as they were lying side by side one night that Banjou suddenly spoke.

“Hey, Sento.”

“What is it, Banjou?” Sento turned his head to look at him, though in the dark he couldn’t see much more than an outline.

Banjou seemed to be staring up at the ceiling. “I’m glad I found you again.”

“Eh?”

“I promised that I would, remember? But when I woke up in the new world alone… I was kinda scared. I wasn’t sure how long it would take. What if you’d landed somewhere far away? Or if you’d left the city and gone somewhere else now that the Skywall was gone? Or— I wasn’t about to give up on you so easily, but you’d seemed so certain that you’d be erased or that I’d forget about you, but clearly you were already wrong about me forgetting so I thought you might be wrong about both. You may be a genius, but I had a feeling you wouldn’t be left behind. See, you should trust my sixth sense!”

Sento rolled his eyes, although Banjou probably couldn’t tell.

“But really, I’m happy you’re still here. Everyone not remembering… well, a lot of bad things happened, but it’s a little sad they don’t recognize us. Sometimes it feels like everything was just a crazy dream, like I never met any of you. But seeing you reminds me it all really happened. We saved the world!” A huff of half-breathless laughter. “It sounds hard to believe if you just say it out loud… It’s all because I met you. It doesn’t matter that Evolt arranged everything; you changed me, made me into someone who could fight for love and peace instead of just for myself.” His lips curved into a soft smile. “Thank you, Sento. For everything in the old world, and for being here with me now.”

Sento had initially been caught off-guard by the sudden sincerity. But as Banjou continued speaking, he was struck with a sense of deja vu, and the words “thank you” sent a abrupt stab of panic through him. The last time Banjou had thanked him like that was as he’d taken Evolt into the light between worlds in Sento’s stead; the time before that, when he’d put his life on the line to defeat Evolt to cure Sento of the alien poison. Words that should have been heartwarming now only made Sento feel the chill of dread. Evolt was gone, neither of them were fatally wounded or ill, and Sento didn’t have any (immediately) self-sacrificial plans in motion for once, so why was this happening? The chill sharpened into a bolt of ice along his spine. Had… had Banjou decided to leave? Sento hadn’t seen any signs of such a plan - no packing, no mentions of places Banjou might have in mind - but then again, they didn’t have much, or maybe Banjou had only just made the decision. But why…? Had he grown tired of Sento’s presence as a constant reminder of the old world’s tragedies? Had he gotten fed up with Sento’s own moments of weakness? Had it become clear, in this new world, that everything really was Sento’s fault, and Banjou was better off without him? He would have been happier if he had simply merged with the other Banjou, living the life he didn’t get to have due to Evolt’s meddling; did he resent Sento for being wrong about that? (He had basically said the opposite a moment ago, and if Sento had stopped to re-examine, he might have realized Banjou was far too honest to sound so sincere while being sarcastic. But fear had overridden rationality, and his mind had jumped straight to the worst.)

“Sento?” Banjou’s voice, slightly embarrassed but mostly full of concern, cut through his spiraling thoughts.

He realized one of his hands - thankfully not the one in Banjou’s line of sight - was now buried in his hair. Quietly, he shoved the offending limb back under the covers. Damn that idiot and his emotional perceptivity. If Banjou wanted to leave, Sento shouldn’t guilt him into staying. Forcing cheer, he answered, “What are you saying, Banjou? It’s just my prerogative as a hero of justice. Stop saying stupid things and get some sleep.” With that, he rolled onto his side, facing away from his companion. There was a beat of stillness, then some hesitant rustling, but Banjou didn’t say anything else. An awkward tension settled over the room and followed them into uneasy sleep.

Neither of them felt particularly well-rested the next morning, and the awkwardness remained heavy between them.

Banjou was mostly just confused. He couldn’t exactly put his finger on it, but Sento definitely seemed upset about something, and it had to do with him. At first he thought it might’ve been a nightmare - there were some days where Sento woke up shaken and spent much of the morning glancing over at Banjou as if making sure he was really there. But as the strange mood persisted, he noticed the way Sento was watching him today felt different from the usual reassurance-seeking. Nightmare-related weirdness typically eased as Sento became more fully awake and realized it was all a dream; whatever this was had intensified instead. Had he done something wrong? It had already started when they’d only just woken up, though, and they’d been fine yesterday… except just before they’d gone to sleep. Sento had been oddly quiet after Banjou had stopped talking. It had taken additional prompting for him to respond, and even then the response had been dismissive rather than proud or smug. So it was probably something Banjou had said, then. But what part of that could have upset Sento so badly that he was still unhappy about it? Banjou had no idea.

Eventually he couldn’t stand the tension any longer. When Sento looked over again from where he was seated, Banjou met his gaze and demanded, “What the hell is going on with you today?”

Instead of caught-in-the-act guilty, Sento’s expression was… angry? offended? “I should be asking you what you think you’re doing.”

How was he supposed to respond to that? He didn’t think he’d been doing anything unusual; that was why he’d been confused in the first place.

His evident bewilderment made Sento’s stormy expression darken further. The nightmare guess hadn't been entirely wrong - the recollections prompted by that “thank you” had influenced Sento's dreams. The poison-fuzzed memory of Banjou unsteady on his feet but stubbornly refusing to leave Sento to die blurred into Sento's battle with Evolt in the light between the worlds, except Evolt wore Banjou's face the whole time instead of Souichi's. Sento still won the fight, but destroying Evolt had destroyed Banjou too… And then he'd woken up to reality, where Banjou had thankfully survived, but he was still about to lose him. As such, his mood was fragile, and his temper was short. “If you’re going to leave then hurry up and just go!”

“Wh—”

“Dragging it out is just cruel! The longer you stay the harder it’s going to be for me to let go of you.”

“What the hell are you talking about, Sento? Why would I— Do you want me to leave?”

“Why are you asking me that? Isn’t that your plan? You all but said goodbye last night!”

“I— what.” Banjou paused and mentally went back over what he could remember of his rambling. “So it was something I said last night… but how was any of that a goodbye?”

Sento had apparently exhausted his anger; it fizzled out into something sad, tired, and a little confused. “You said ‘thank you’ and really meant it. You’ve only ever done that when… when……” He had to stop to take a shaky breath. “When you were about to do something you wouldn’t come back from.”

“...Eh? Really?” Banjou muttered to himself. He hadn’t noticed the pattern, but now that Sento had pointed it out, it did seem to ring true. Oops.

“And then I’d have to go save you from Evolt! You, the hero? Nevermind the sidekick, you were practically the damsel in distress!” Despite his words, Sento couldn’t muster enough bite in his voice to mask how vulnerable he felt.

Banjou could tell, and instead of retorting in offense, he went quiet and pensive. “Sento…” After a moment’s hesitation, he got up and draped himself over Sento’s shoulders in an awkward sort of back hug. “I’m not saying goodbye this time. As long as you want me here— even if you don’t want me here anymore. Where else would I go? Everything I thanked you for; that’s why I want to stay with you. But those times when I thought I might not be able to… it was selfish of me, but I couldn't let go without making sure you knew how grateful I am that we met.”

Sento had tensed at the contact, but he didn't fight it. "So you're… not leaving, then?" He felt Banjou nod. The tension drained out of him, and he leaned back into the embrace.

"I'm not leaving," Banjou affirmed. "I didn't realize the thought of it would scare you so badly."

"Scared? Who's scared of— Ow!" Sento swatted away the hand that had flicked him on the side of the head.

"I'm not so stupid that you can fool me after all that. You were definitely scared." Sento tried to wriggle away in protest, but Banjou tightened his hold. "Me too,” he murmured into Sento’s hair. “I don’t want to lose you.” Sento stilled. "Not just because you're the only one left now - I felt the same in the old world. Not just because the world needed your smarts, either. It’s because you're Kiryuu Sento, the person who I believe in, the person who believes in me… the person who I love.”

Sento sat stunned for a moment. He'd rarely dared to hope Banjou would feel the same way. Was he dreaming a good dream for once? No, he was pretty sure he was awake. "But… Kasumi…?" he asked quietly, still dazed.

"I miss her, and the grief hasn't gone away, but… we talked about it, when I proposed to her, you know? She told me if… if the illness got the better of her, she wanted me to find someone else I could be vulnerable with. You saved me, and you were so kind and so good in spite of everything - the way I treated you at first, and all the terrible things that happened to us. Somewhere along the way what I thought of you went from obligation to genuine admiration to something more.” He bit his lip, then continued, “This world's Kasumi isn't quite the one I knew, and I'm not quite the Banjou she likes; it wouldn't be fair to any of us if I tried to mess with that. And why would I, when my heart is already yours?"

Following that declaration, the room fell silent. Pressed up against him as he was, Sento could hear the nervous drum of Banjou's heartbeat.

As the silence stretched on, Banjou began to wonder if he’d made a mistake. He slackened his grip on Sento's shoulders. "Sento…? I-if you don't—"

"Idiot." Sento cut him off. He slipped out of Banjou's lax arms, but only so he could stand, turn, and hug him properly without the chair in the way, resting his chin on one shoulder. “How could I not feel the same? You’re my precious partner, my Best Match. At first you were lost and angry, but you had so much potential to do good with the right guidance. And as you achieved that potential… well. You saved me too."

Suddenly Banjou's arms were around him again, clasping him tightly - too tightly. "Musclehead… let me… breathe…" he wheezed.

"Sorry." It was a genuine apology, but the sheer joy in Banjou’s voice suggested there was an ear-to-ear grin on his face and somewhat ruined the effect. The vice grip loosened slightly. "I'm just happy."

There were any number of mocking things Sento could have said in that moment, but he felt no urge to do so. “I know,” he replied instead. He might not have chosen the same word as Banjou had to describe it, but he could understand the emotion - the almost giddy burst of elation and relief that he no longer had to hide his feelings, and that those feelings were not only tolerated but reciprocated. He was glad Banjou couldn’t see his face while they were hugging like this; he had no idea what sort of embarrassingly sappy expression was on it.

They stayed like that for some time, enjoying both the closeness and the fact that they no longer had to make excuses for it. As they finally moved out of the embrace, Sento reached over and grabbed one of Banjou’s hands, not yet willing to break physical contact. “I’m glad, too.”

“Mm?” Banjou looked up from their joined hands.

“That you found me again.”

It took a minute for Banjou to realize Sento was echoing his words from the night before, but he smiled and laced their fingers together.

“I wouldn’t want to be here without you.”