Archive of Our Own ^beta

Kurt and Noah have known each other since they were in Mrs. Post’s kindergarten class.  They were friends for a long time.  Noah had been there for Kurt in second grade when his mom passed away.  He was too young to really know how to help, but he made sure Kurt knew he was there if he needed him. 

Kurt, in turn, was there for Noah when his dad would come home drunk, yelling at Noah, his little sister, Sarah, and their Ma.  He was there again when Noah’s dad left the family without any warning.  And again, when Noah’s Ma seemed to take to drinking, too, to try to numb the pain.

The boys remained friends until around 7th grade, when they moved up to Jr. High School.  Everything seemed to change then.  The boys were all getting bigger, with the exception of Kurt.  Puberty was well underway, again, with the exception of Kurt.  Boys became interested in girls...with the exception of Kurt.  

Noah didn’t understand it.  And it wasn’t as if he didn’t try.  He tried to stay friends, but the social pressure of his teammates was too much for him.

By eighth grade, Noah was the wide receiver, team captain, the guy invited to all the parties, the mohawked bad boy that all the girls swooned over.  He was smart.  Got good grades even.  But only the teachers seemed to know that.  That continued into High School.

Kurt was the quiet kid who was a complete bitch if he was pushed too far.  He was studious and sang in the choir.  He was well liked by his small group of friends.  He, and everyone around him, if they’d admit it, knew he was too big for this small town school.  He was meant for greater things. 

And that...that was intimidating.  

And when macho boys who think they have something to prove get intimidated, it can all go wrong very quickly, and in a big way. When bitchiness and testosterone meet, shit can often hit the fan. 

Kurt and Noah no longer spoke, but it didn’t take long for Kurt to realize that the bullying he experienced never happened when Noah was around.  It was as if the other jocks were afraid of what Noah would do.  Almost as if he had warned them.  

By the end of Freshman year, Kurt had taken to bringing extra clothes with him.  He was slushied multiple times a week.  He also got the occasional locker shove.  All annoying, but nothing earth shattering.

In his sophomore year, things started to get a little more tense.  The locker shoves were harder, and some of the jocks had taken to throwing him in dumpsters.  He didn’t know what to do about it.  But he didn’t have to wonder too long.  Apparently Noah had found out.  That was the only reasonable explanation Kurt could think of.  The offenders showed up to school the next day with black eyes, and Kurt was never touched again for the remainder of the year.  Kurt tried not to think too much of it.

During the first week of his Junior year, Kurt was messing around with some of his choir friends.  They were dancing and he did a flip from standing position.  He hadn’t even thought twice about it.  He had taken gymnastics since he was a toddler.  It had been a couple of years since lessons, but he still messed around with his skills, never losing them.  

Santana was walking by the choir room when his antics caught her eye.  She stopped and watched for a few minutes, then a genius idea struck her.  She marched herself into the room, grabbed his arm, “Come on.”

He frowned and pulled away, “Excuse me?”

She rolled her eyes, “Look, Twinkerbell, we’re going to go change your life.  For the better.  Let’s go.” 

“Go where?  Why the hell would I ever go anywhere with you?”

“Because I just saw you do a flip from standing position.”

“And?”

“And you’d be perfect for the Cheerios.”

Kurt looked surprised, “You and your lemmings make fun of me.  Why on earth would I want to be one of you?” He turned his back on her and continued talking to his friend, Mercedes.

Santana turned and walked away, but she was nowhere close to being finished.  She thought about it all day, not paying attention in any of her classes. She didn’t know how she could convince him.  

That was until she saw it.  

Big, bad, Dave Karofsky, with slushy in hand, was headed straight for Kurt. That was, until Noah Puckerman steps in front of him, silently grabs his sleeve, and turns his teammate around to walk the other direction.  He threw an arm around the big guy and was quietly saying something that Santana just couldn’t make out.  She knew Puck was going to be the one to help her convince Kurt. 

Except he wasn’t.

She pushed her way into the locker room once most of the guys had left after practice and cornered him.  

“What’s up with you keeping Karofsky from throwing that sugary goodness in Hummelina’s face today?”

Puck frowned, “What are you talking about?”

“Don’t play dumb, Puckerman.  I saw it with my own eyes.”

He put his shirt on and turned to face her, “I’m just tired of my teammates being assholes.  If I can influence them to do better, I will.”

She hummed and cocked her hip.  “I want Hummel on the squad. He said ‘no’, if you can believe that. Can you help me convince him?”

“Why would you think he’d listen to me, if he didn’t listen to you?”

“Maybe you could convince Twinkerbell that if he joined the squad, then all the pirates would behave and he can finally enjoy our Neverland.”

“Maybe if your Neverland Squad weren’t asshole pirates, too, he would have said ‘yes’.” He walked away.

Much to his surprise, and delight, Santana was eventually able to convince Kurt to join.  It only cost her, and the entire school, the small price of leaving Kurt and his friends alone.  Puck still kept an eye on him, but for the most part, things were going well. And he would admit to himself that watching Kurt cheer was pretty amazing.  He had to work hard not to get distracted at games.  Instead, he tried to show off. He had figured out his feelings a long time ago. He just didn’t know what to do about them.

Senior year, he wasn’t the only one to notice Kurt.  He walked into Lima Bean one day and noticed Kurt sitting with some prep school boys, who were flirting relentlessly.  He didn’t like the feeling it stirred inside him, but at the same time, he was happy that Kurt found people who could appreciate him.  He deserved that.  

He noticed throughout the next few months that Kurt was smiling more, and often headed toward the Lima Bean after practice, instead of home.  Kurt couldn’t seem to wipe the smile off his face.  

But one day, he came to school with a bruised jaw and the saddest eyes Puck had ever seen. Puck cornered Santana. “Find out who did that to him,” he growled.

She smirked, “Awe, Puck.  You have feelings.”

Puck looked at her with all the seriousness he could manage, “Kurt and I were friends for a long time growing up.  I try, okay.  I try not to let shit happen to him.  I’ve got it under control as much as I can manage. I want to know who did that to him. ”

She studied him, then said, “My third eye is telling me that there’s more to it.”

“Well, my third eye is telling me people would have a field day if they knew what really happens in the girls locker room with you and Brittany.”

The smugness was gone from her face instantly, “You wouldn’t.”

“Not if I didn’t have to.  We’re all trying to survive here, and you know it.”

She nodded, “Okay.  I have a feeling it was his boyfriend.  Some asshole from Dalton, named Blaine.”

Puck hated that Kurt had a boyfriend, but he despised the fact that the guy was abusive.  “Why do you think that?”

“I overheard him saying something to Mercedes about Blaine wanting to go all the way and not taking ‘no’ for an answer.  Kurt fought back though.”

Puck was trying to steady his breathing and clear his vision, “So… he didn’t rape him?”

“No. Hummelina’s got some fight in him.”

Puck didn’t stick around to listen to anything else.  

The next night, Puck found himself in the parking lot of a restaurant outside of Westerville.  He watched as a small group of blazer-clad boys came out laughing and carrying on.  He approached them, “Which one of you is Blaine?”

No one said anything, but some of them turned to look at Blaine, so Puck focused in on him. He looked him up and down with an unimpressed look, “Really? Are you Kurt’s boyfriend?”

Blaine made a face and spoke bitterly, “I was .”

“Awe,” Puck mocked sympathy, “he didn’t like being sexually assaulted?  You poor thing.” He focused on the bruising around Blaine’s eye and nodded to it, “Come anywhere near him again, and that pretty shiner he gave you will be the least of your worries.  Touch him, and I’ll cut off your dick so you can use it as your own personal dildo…But only after I’ve beaten the crap out of you. Do you understand?”

Blaine was staring like a deer in headlights and simply nodded.

A tall, lean, boy who had been all over Blaine as they came out of the restaurant, eyed Puck up and down, “That’s sexy as fuck.  What’s your name?”

Blaine frowned at him and hissed, “Seb….”

One of the other boys threw his hand over his mouth, trying not to laugh, but the others just rolled their eyes.

Puck looked at him, “My name isn’t important.” He looked at Blaine again, “But your actions are.  Think of me next time you feel like Kurt deserves someone like you.  I promise you, he deserves better.” He turned and walked away.

The next morning, Kurt was at his locker when Puck passed by.  Kurt turned to watch him walk by, and stared when Puck stopped at his own locker.  Puck looked back at him and gave him a small nod, but otherwise, tried to focus on his books.  When he looked back again, Kurt was gone.

College was everything Kurt had hoped it would be.  He and Rachel lived together in their Bushwick flat as they both worked their butts off at NYADA.  Every once in a while, he would see someone out of the corner of his eye who would remind him of Noah Puckerman.  He was never able to get a full look though.  

He often wondered about him.  He thought back to high school and all of the things Puck had done to keep him safe.  He knew it was him.  He understood that Puck wasn’t comfortable coming right out and saying so though.  He often wished they could have stayed friends. 

Now, he was wondering if his mind was playing tricks on him.  Maybe it was all just wishful thinking.

Over the years, Kurt dated quite a few guys. Most were nice, but no one ever really kept his attention long.  He wasn’t sure what it was that they all lacked, but he knew it was something. He decided to just keep plugging through, focusing on himself and his career, and the right guy would find him.

The theater gods were smiling down on Kurt.  Not long after he graduated form NYADA, a new show was set to open on Broadway… Dear Evan Hanson.  Kurt auditioned for the lead role and was both thrilled and shocked when he got it.

He worked is butt off preparing for opening night, but when it came, he had no nerves, and only excitement.  He peaked out into the audience to see if his dad was there in the seats he had reserved for him.  He was sitting proudly, pointing to the playbill as he spoke to the older man in the seat next to him.  

Kurt smiled and started to pull away to return to his spot backstage, but a man and woman caught his eye.  They were holding hands as the man led the way to their seats.  He was turned sideways and looking down as they scooted past people.  Just when Kurt was almost able to confirm his first instinct that it was Noah Puckerman, a crew member grabbed his shoulder.

“It’s almost time, Kurt.”

“Okay, thanks,” he whispered as he hurried to his spot.

The show was a success.  Kurt owned the stage like he was born to, and the audience roared with cheers and applauded with a standing ovation at the end.  Kurt took his bow, trying to see out into the audience at where he knew his father, Rachel, and a few other friends were. He looked towards where he had last seen the man who caught his eye.  But all he could see were silhouettes because of the spotlights.  

He was in his dressing room when his dad came back to see him. They hugged and his dad showered him with compliments.  They were interrupted with a knock on the door.

A young usher entered, “Mr. Hummel, these were just dropped off for you.  Some handsome guy paid me to make sure you got them tonight.” He bounced his eyebrows.

“Oh really,” Burt said, grinning at Kurt.

Kurt looked at him funny, then accepted the flowers.  He read the card out loud, “You were just as amazing as I knew you would be.  Congratulations on making your dreams come true..”  It wasn’t signed.

Kurt narrowed his eyes at his father, “Do you know who these are from?”

“I might,” he shrugged.  

“Who?”

“He’s waited this long,  I’m not going to tattle on him.”

Kurt stood a little straighter, “Is it him?” His excitement and curiosity grew, “Is it Noah?  I thought I saw…”

His dad shrugged, and was trying not to smile. 

Kurt looked at the usher, “Is he still here?”

They shrugged, “He left with some lady.”

Kurt frowned a little, wondering who the lady was.  At this point, he didn’t care.  He took off out the door. He ran to the side entrance that led to an alley.  He ran down to the main street where he saw a man who he was sure was the same one from earlier.  He started towards them, dodging a few people along the way.  

He watched as the man kissed the woman on the cheek before she climbed into a cab.  The man watched the cab drive away in the same direction Kurt was running.  When he turned around, their eyes met.

Kurt was a few yards away and was slowing to a normal pace.  Puck stood there with his hands in his pockets and didn’t look away.  He smiled warmly, “You were amazing tonight.”

Kurt stepped closer, “It was you.”

Puck slowly shrugged his shoulders and nodded.

“It was always you.”  When Puck didn’t respond, Kurt continued as he inched closer, “It was always you, keeping an eye on me.  Making sure I was okay.  Taking care of bullies and bad boyfriends.  It’s always been you.” He was only a foot away now. “Am I wrong?”

Puck shook his head, “No.”

“Why?”

He spoke softly, “Because I’ve never stopped caring about you.”

There was a heavy silence after that.  Neither knew what to say, but both were content to just be in each other’s presence.  Finally, Kurt asked, “Is tonight why you came to New York?”

“Tonight is why I’m standing on Broadway, but I live in New York.  I have for nearly five years.”

Kurt frowned a little. He hesitated, always thinking he had been seeing things that night. “Was that you at the hospital?  I could have sworn I saw someone leave my hospital room the night I got beat up.”

Puck nodded, “It was.  I really wish you hadn’t gone into that alley.  I ran into you dad at the hospital.  I confessed everything. He told me you were trying to save someone, but Kurt…”

Kurt focused on what Puck had just said, “Confessed?”

He nodded, “Confessed that I was watching out for you during high school.  Confessed that I moved to New York in hopes that here, I would finally get the nerve to be myself. Confessed that I’ve been in love with you since I knew what love was.”

Kurt’s eyes widened, “Puck…”

He shrugged, “I go by ‘Noah’ now.”

Kurt smiled a little.  He had always hated “Puck”. Especially when “Noah” was perfectly lovely. He refocused again, “But who was that woman?”

“Sarah.  She moved here with me right away.  Went to high school here, and is now a freshman at NYU.”

Kurt smiled a little bigger, “All grown up.”

Noah nodded, “Yeah.  But don’t tell her I agreed with that statement.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it. What about you?”

“Went to school for business.  I run a bar in West Village, with hopes of owning it one day.”

“Wow.”

Noah smiled a little and shifted, “So…”

Kurt grinned. “So.  You’ve been in love with me?” he teased with a raised brow.

Noah gave a lopsided smile as he rolled his eyes and looked off to the side.  He looked back and nodded, “Always have been.  Always will be.”

Kurt stepped closer, “I’ve compared every man I’ve ever dated to you. It took me a long time to realize that’s what I was doing.  Something was always just…not right.  It’s because they weren’t you, Noah Puckerman. It’s always been you that I’ve been missing.” He stepped even closer, “Can I kiss you?”

Noah's voice was just above a whisper, “Please do.”

Kurt leaned up as he held on to Noah's waist and pressed his lips to Noah’s.  It was soft and sweet.  Noah’s hands flew up to frame Kurt’s face, and he deepened the kiss.  

Standing half a block away, with Rachel by his side, Burt smiled and looked at her, “It’s about time.”

“All of his dreams really did come true tonight.”