Chapter Text
Eddie reached out for the piece of him that had been torn from his body and tossed on the ground like they were nothing. It broke Eddie’s heart in more places than one and the pain in his body hurt more because of it. He’d always thought of Venom as nothing other than someone to be loved and revered, especially as they lay shuddering under the weight of both of their loss. The loss of each other. He reached out, though it’s a weak attempt and even if he’d managed to re bond with Venom, Carnage would just tear them apart again and the shock of that would have more than likely killed him.
“V….” He says weakly, quietly.
He watched as their small form turned towards him and despite their bond having seemingly been broken, he knew what they’re thinking, it’d been written all over their face if he could see it, if he could feel them.
Regret.
Carnage wanted to “play”, as he put it, and Peter wasn’t sure what that meant, not until the black viscous mass that is Venom was slinking up his leg and wrapped around him.
“No. No. No. Brock! Stop it! Eddie! Please stop it, don't let them-“Peter’s words were cut off by the voice that rumbled in his head like a nightmare.
We have to. Carnage could kill us if we try to go back with Eddie.
And for a second Peter let himself believe that he’d be okay with that and that he’d never regret letting Eddie Brock and Venom die, that he could go into that underground bunker and lie to everyone but even as scared as he was, he knew that's a lie. He couldn’t do that Eddie and he couldn’t do that to the world, not again.
“Okay…”Peter breathed “okay…”
What could Venom say about Peter Parker that another version of them hadn’t? They knew how this was going to end if they tried to stay with him, they knew the heartbreak and betrayal that would fill their heart and soul. It may have taken billions of tries across billions of universes but they had no doubts that Eddie was the only person they could ever truly love, he was their soulmate and they were his.
And that is what kept them from that part of themselves, because if they betrayed Eddie, it wouldn’t just break his heart, it would kill him, every last piece of good in him would die and they knew that no matter how lost they found themselves in Peter, they would never forgive themselves.
We will not stay long.
When you feel alone or rather when you are alone, it is a sensation unlike any other. See sometimes cold can feel hot and happiness can feel like sadness, but loneliness, true aching loneliness is unlike any other emotion and maybe in their thousands of lifetimes they haven’t figured out why that is and they knew right then was not the most optimal time to be searching what hollowed part of themself for that answer.
Because Eddie was half dead and scared and alone and they had to keep him safe like they promised they would. They seeped into Peter and felt all the terrible things he felt towards them, towards Eddie and a part of them wanted to kill Peter for even considering letting Eddie die. But they won’t and they’re angry that they won’t. And Carnage can kill all of them at any moment he wanted to and even if Eddie could forgive them over a million lifetimes for not being able to keep their promise once, they could never forgive themself.
Peter stood on steady legs. He felt wrong and barely human and for a second, just a second he remembered when Gwen died and he remembered this is exactly how he felt then.
“Get it over with!” He growled. Kasady’s smile was filled with viscera and sinew and it still didn’t come close to being as disgusting as he felt with one of these aliens crawling in and out and around his body.
As you wish. His voice wasn’t as distorted as Peter could hear with his own ears and wondered for a moment if this is what Brock hears when he talks to these things. The thought disappeared as soon as he was on the ground again and got up so fast to be dizzying but he wasn’t just off the ground, he was on a building and Venom is ripping off shingles and throwing them at Kasady who was dragging Eddie by the leg from the abandoned building and dangled him up like he’s something to be eaten.
Here! Venom’s rage was palpable inside their bond and Peter never thought hate and anger could have an actual taste, but it did and it's bitter like coffee and burns like acid.
Can’t let us have our snack?
Venom growled and they flung both of them off the roof. Instinctively Peter tapped the center of his palm, he didn't expect anything to happen but he should have known the parasite invaded his mind because thick black webs latched on a building and softened their landing.
How!?
Venom only growled.
If you can read my mind or whatever, I need to get to my room. I-I think I have something that could end this.
Dresser?
What?
It’s in your dresser?
A thought sparked in Peter’s brain. Venom saw the synapse fire and fire and light up others around it and watched as it moved through his brain faster, faster than they could move. But they didn’t make a move to stop it, because this had been why they needed Peter, this had been what they were hiding and how much of that Peter and Eddie had known, they didn’t have time to guess.
It’s the only way…
I know.
***
Venom wondered if it was Kasady’s sadistic nature that had turned their spawn into what he’d become or if he’d have turned out like this no matter what.
Carnage had Eddie by the head, vulnerable, scared and alone. His eyes were hazy with unshed tears and Venom thought to lunge for their spawn but they knew that they could kill Eddie and if they left Peter, then they might now survive long enough to save any of them.
My way first. Venom said but they knew Peter didn’t care.
Venom stalked towards their spawn, slowly, and when they were almost close enough that they could see as the light in Eddie’s eye’s dimmed. They thought they could reach for them but Carnage threw him as soon as they attempted to move. They heard a soft crack followed by a stream of blood and that pooled around Eddie’s head, staining his hair. Venom lunged for Carnage but felt themself being held back by Peter.
Venom, we need to save him.
They didn’t listen to him.
Venom!
Peter was strong enough that it took formidable effort for them to ignore his pleas and fight his body as they struggled with slowly diverging goals.
Lovers quarrel? Carnage hissed out a laugh.Carnage was strong, Venom knew this too. With every stab into their flesh and every tear at their form, Venom and Peter by extension only learned of their own weaknesses. Venom grabbed onto Carnage’s arm, attempting to pull themself from his grasp but they couldn’t, they could feel themself weakening, like every little drop of immortal life they thought they had, had drained from them and all they could think about was Eddie who had been in a pool of his own blood, dying, because they were unable to stand the thought that he might already be dead.
Venom roared and bellowed, and they wished the decibels of their anguish had been enough to kill the creature they had created, the creature that held them by the neck against a wall of air.
You’re weak.
It's all Carnage said before he dug his fingers into Venom’s flesh and tore them from Peter Parker. Carnage raised them up above their mouth but they had forgotten Peter Parker, who was dull and tired as the rest of the world but had managed to tear a plank of wood from ground and slammed it into Carnage’s arm before running to get the device that would end this all.
They scrambled to Eddie and did their best to heal all the breaks and tears, they repeated to him over and over and overagain: sosorrysosorryEddieweresosorrylovesosorrywe won’teverletthishappenagainwelldiefirst.
It hadn’t felt like enough and they felt like they didn’t deserve the forgiveness he gave them, that he would give them when they met in the next life but there was nothing they could do, it was over. They curled in his chest because when they died, they wanted nothing more than to die with Eddie, the only being that made their universe complete.
***
It was a box, small, like a deck of cards and Carnage almost laughed, he was going to kill Peter as soon as he hobbled out of the nearly ruined shack but both he and Carnage wanted to see where this was going.
Eddie crawled away with their weakened form cradled in his body. He had to get out, had to leave before, before…he didn’t know but he had to leave or try to because if Venom died, he didn’t know if he could make it in a world without them.
Peter pressed the button.
A sound like death rang out in the world around them, the sound Venom and Carnage’s screeching seemingly overpowered the sound that emitted from Peter’s fingers. At first Eddie wasn’t able to register the pain in his ears and body. It was so overwhelming until he realized he was screaming too and his throat was raw and Venom was saying one last thing inside his mind: This isn’t goodbye, Eddie. But it definitely sounded like one.
He doesn’t know if he passed out or if he simply had been unable to move due to the shock of everything that just had happened. He stared blankly at the brilliant night sky. Venom’s half formed, half dead body laid on his chest and he put a hand on them, hoping it had all been a nightmare he could wake up from and be comforted by them.
It’s all okay, love. I’m here. Always here. Safe. We’re safe.
But that wasn’t one of those times and maybe he’d never have those times again. Not until he died. Not until they found each other again. When he opened his eyes again, Peter’s face was looking down at him, worry etched in every one of his features.
“Did you know!?” Eddie’s voice was so loud, so raw, Peter could feel the pain in his own throat. “Did you know?!”
“No.” Peter lied, quicker than he expected “Eddie…” they knew too.
Eddie scrambled away, the half soil, half liquid leaking mass of Venom dangling around in his arms because it didn’t matter if they were dead, Eddie wasn’t able to let go.
Peter wasn't an idiot, he knew Eddie didn’t believe him but he didn't care. Carnage was dead, Kasady had turned into an easy-to-deal-with-monster. His last words being of a poem he’d written long before the world fell apart.
“You-“ Eddie’s voice broke “don’t understand…You ju-“ Eddie’s voice was cut off by a sob that tore through his already shredded throat.
Peter knew Eddie wouldn’t believe anything he said, even if it was the truth. It was cold outside, so he picked the larger man up, being sure to avoid the limp mass of the dead creature in Eddie’s arms. He took Eddie to the barely standing medical center, the alien had done a good job at keeping him alive so maybe the least Peter could do now was to help repair what Venom hadn’t been able to.
He knew part of this gesture was to clear his conscience but it didn’t change the outcome, it didn’t change the look of hate that Eddie had given him or the last words he’d said to him before leaving, alone.
I used to think you were a good person. Maybe you’re proof that there is nothing good left in this world.
***
The sound of the waves crashing is calming. Eddie’s body had long since healed in most places and all he was waiting for now was to see boats on the horizon.
“I can’t keep losing you.” Eddie said softly, his throat was still recovering from the events of the months prior.
We know.
“V.”
Yes, love.
“I’d never forgive myself if that happened again.”
A small huff escaped Venom, they can’t help but feel the same but they’re too tired to even think about what to respond with.
A boat crested the horizon and Eddie stood. A question came to his mind and he asked, tentatively as the idea of what the answer could be worried him.
“You don’t have to answer now but can I ask you something?”
Venom gave a hum of approval.
“Riot’s soulmate was a human and so was Carnage’s. When you all came here…was it just bad luck or was it because of us?” It was an interesting question, one of many that Venom was positive they’d never know in a million lifetimes. Still though, they mustered the strength because they wanted to answer Eddie, they wanted to put his mind at ease before they got on that boat and tried to live the last how many years of their life in peace.
Our spawn are not made the same as humans. We do not love them or care for them and they come out knowing nearly everything they need to know about the universe that they can to survive. Riot and Carnage wanted to come to Earth just as much as we did.
“Love, that doesn’t answer m-“
We do not know, Eddie.
“Oh.”
How many times had they told him that and he accepted it as it was? Why had this felt different? Why had this felt more terrifying?
There will always be people in the universe who do terrible things, sad people like Peter who do terrible and broken people like us trying to find our way around it all.
Something like maybe acceptance washed over Eddie as he waded through the water to meet the boat that Dan was driving. Venom’s answer was unsatisfying but he didn’t have a better one.
Maybe let’s get some rest then, love. So we can keep facing it all together.