Work Text:
· ♩ ̩̩̥͙＊*•♬ ̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙ ♪*˚♩♬˚*•̩̩͙✩•♪ ̩̩͙*˚＊·♩ ̩̩̥͙ *
All my life I've tried to make everybody happy
While I just hurt and hide
Waiting for someone to tell me it's my turn to decide
~ Sara Bareilles
· ♩ ̩̩̥͙＊*•♬ ̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙ ♪*˚♩♬˚*•̩̩͙✩•♪ ̩̩͙*˚＊·♩ ̩̩̥͙ *
The first day of a new school was always scariest.
Merlin was used to the tiny village school he’d spent five years of his education in. But now all his hard work had paid off and he was able to continue his studies at the private school in the nearest city for two more years before he planned to leave for university.
Not many people got this opportunity and none of Merlins friends from the village had gotten it, so Merlin carried his heavy bag of science books to the tiny bus stop, the slight chill that September always brought with it in the air. He caught the bus and in twenty minutes it stopped outside a huge bustling building.
Camelot College was a lot more intimidating than Merlin had imagined but there was no point in being nervous. He was excited more than anything.
He pushed through the throngs of people stood around the entrance and entered a long corridor with lockers along the walls on either side. On his phone he inspected the map he’d been emailed and then double checked his locker number.
He was 56 which according to his map was upstairs very close to where his first class would be taking place.
Upstairs was far less busy, and Merlin followed the numbers until he stood in front of what was supposedly his locker. Except that a gang of boys were gathered around it as one of them collected his things from locker 55. They were laughing loudly and discussing the football. Or that was what it sounded like to Merlin.
He cleared his through as he stood in front of them waiting for them to notice him. When no one heard, he raised his voice slightly so that he could be heard over them. “Excuse me!”
The blonde boy in the middle noticed first. The one who’s locker they were gathered around. He smirked as he slammed the metal door shut with a clatter.
“Haven’t seen you around before.” He looked Merlin up and down, eyes stopped on Merlin’s ears. Merlin blushed self-consciously.
“I’d just like to get to my locker please.” Merlin had no intention of aggravating them or forcing conversation. The boy didn’t move and now the rest of the gang were watching and waiting to see what he’d do. He must’ve been the team leader or something.
“You’re new.”
“It seems you have great observation skills.” Merlin muttered. “Can I please get to my locker?”
The blonde looked stunned for half a second before moving out of the way just enough for Merlin to pull his locker open. Merlin was aware of the boys behind him, still muttering between themselves but also one particular pair of eyes boring into the back of his head. Merlin stacked his books in his locker and locked it behind him just as the bell rang.
Pushing past the boys again, he began his way down the corridor towards his first lesson.
“See you later nerd.” He heard the boys snigger as they yelled after him. Merlin rolled his eyes and ignored them.
When he made it to his class, he was given his seat and then began to unpack his bag. A girl with a mass of dark curly hair fell into the seat beside him and started ranting about the stressful morning she’d had until she stopped and stared at Merlin.
“Hi.” He greeted awkwardly as she gazed at him with wide eyes. “I’m Merlin.”
“Sorry!” She quickly jumped into action. “Most people are used to my ranting! I’m Gwen.”
“Nice to meet you.”
“You must be new this year. I’ll be glad to show you the ropes.” Gwen beamed and Merlin wasn’t sure he’d ever seen someone smile so wide.
~ ♛ ~
After their first lesson together, Merlin decided he quite liked Gwen. She was a funny character. Bubbly and talkative. Merlin liked that though because it meant that he didn’t have to speak as much. And he enjoyed just listening sometimes.
“So, you see I love all the sciences, but I think physics would be my favourite which is an unpopular opinion I know but—"
“Guinevere.” That posh and condescending tone was the only warning Merlin got before the blonde boy from earlier had joined them.
Gwen visibly sighed.
“How is the prettiest girl in Camelot doing today?” He grinned.
“Go away Arthur, we both know you’re not interested in people like me.”
“Doesn’t stop you from being the prettiest girl here though.”
Gwen rolled her eyes but to Merlin’s surprise, linked arms with Arthur and pulled Merlin along with the other. “Don’t expect me to tell you you’re the prettiest boy because you know that I only have eyes for Lance.”
“Of course.” Arthur replied as they entered the cafeteria.
“You joining us for lunch? I said Merlin could join today.”
“Err no. I have a free last so I’m going home.” Arthur eyed Merlin warily.
“Suit yourself.” Gwen shrugged and then let go of their arms to embrace a boy coming towards them. Arthur disappeared almost as quickly as he’d appeared. “Lance!” She pressed a wet kiss to his cheek before turning to Merlin. “Oh, this is Merlin. He’s new so I said he could sit at our table.”
Lance smiled widely. “Nice to meet you, Merlin.”
“Hi.” Merlin smiled nervously. Gwen took his arm again and pulled him through the throng of people in the cafeteria to a table already surrounded by half a dozen people.
Merlin took an empty chair and sat back to watch as everyone chatted amongst themselves.
“Where’s Arthur? Don’t tell me he got detention again.” A girl with pale almost glowing skin and dark wavy hair beside Merlin asked.
“He’s finished for the day. Said he was going home.” Gwen replied from where she sat in Lances lap.
The girl frowned. “Weird. He usually stays away from home as much as possible.”
“I’m sure he’s fine Morgs.”
“I’m going to message him just in case.” The girl, Morgs, said as she got out her phone and frantically started typing. When she glanced up from her phone, she looked at Merlin like she was only noticing him for the first time. In fairness she probably was.
When she just stared Merlin realised she was waiting for him to speak first. “Oh, I’m Merlin. I’m new here for sixth form.”
“Oh brilliant! Well, I’m Morgana.” She beamed and reached out to ruffle Merlin’s hair. “You’ll be most welcome here.”
“Thanks.” Merlin smiled back. Morgana looked back at her phone.
“Dammit Arthur.” She muttered. “Sorry. He’s my rogue brother. Left me on read as usual.”
“Oh.” Merlin couldn’t help but sound surprised. Already there were plenty of differences he could notice between Morgana and Arthur.
“Yeah, well half-brother anyway.” She sighed before packing some things back into her bag and standing up. “I should go and call him.”
Merlin just watched her go, shrugging off her behaviour. He’d only just met her maybe she was one of those sisters who cared for their sibling. Merlin had heard they existed somewhere.
Merlin went with Lance to his last lesson of the day. They were both taking chemistry, so Gwen insisted they go together. Lance seemed nice enough, so Merlin was glad he was making friends.
~ ♛ ~
Day two went similarly. Morgana accompanied Merlin to his first English lesson and then he met Gwen again for history. Everything was going smoothly until Merlin was switching his books ready for chemistry and Arthur barged through with his little gang.
“All right nerd?” He sniggered, budging Merlin’s shoulder harsher than necessary.
“The nerd you’re referring to has a name.” Merlin scowled.
Arthur raised his eyebrows and crossed his arms, leaning casually against his locker. Merlin stared, waiting for him to respond when Arthur reached out and took the ID hung around Merlin’s neck to study it.
“Merlin. Merlin Wyllt.” Arthur scoffed and he let the card swing back against Merlin’s stomach. “Let me guess, you have some completely normal middle name behind all of that.”
“Erm.” Merlin fumbled with his book suddenly nervous. Is this what bullying was like? Merlin had never been to a big enough school to get bullied. “Emrys?” He replied feeling completely out of place.
If possible, Arthur’s face lit up with further glee. “Merlin Emrys Wyllt. Well, there’s one I’ve never heard before.”
“Yes well.” Merlin slammed his locker shut and glared piercing eyes at Arthur. He was shocked by the bright eyes that stared back. So blue and perfect. Merlin just shook his head and left.
“See ya later Merls.” Arthur called after him. Merlin was horrified to find that he was blushing.
~ ♛ ~
So, it became tradition for Merlin to sit with Gwen and her friends for lunch. They had sort of adopted him into their gang and Merlin was glad of it. Arthurs little pack of boys also occupied this table, but they were all very nice and accommodated Merlin happily. It was just Arthur who was a bit of an authoritative prat.
But Merlin had only had to put up with him for one of five lunch times that week. On day three Morgana had alerted him that Arthur was off ill.
Merlin didn’t fail to notice how fidgety and on edge Morgana was when Arthur wasn’t around. Just like that first day, she was checking her phone every few seconds and tapping her long purple nails on the table impatiently. When Arthur had been sat right in front of her the second day she’d been completely at ease and even had an argument with her brother, telling him to fuck off. Their behaviour confused Merlin.
~ ♛ ~
The next few weeks went pretty much the same. History and English and Chemistry, sitting with Gwen and Morgana, being pushed, and teased by Arthur every time he went to his locker. It was all becoming normal, everyday life.
Slowly the remnants of summer turned to autumn and then autumn faded into winter.
It was the end of November and Merlin had a history essay due at the end of the week. He’d lost track of time in the library and missed the last bus back to Ealdor.
So now he was sat on the curb waiting for his Uncle Gaius to finish work and drive into Camelot to collect him. He sighed as he prepared for the scolding he was bound to get the second he sat down in the passenger’s seat.
“You look like you’re about to freeze Wyllt.” A slurred voice sounded behind him. Merlin turned sharply as Arthur fell clumsily down to sit beside him. Merlin pulled his coat and scarf further around himself and toed at a stone by his foot. “It’s dark. You shouldn’t be out here alone.” He continued when Merlin didn’t speak.
“I could say the same to you.” Merlin snapped back. He was miserable and tired. The last thing he wanted was to be prodded by Arthur.
“I’m tough. No one is going to come near me.”
Merlin snorted and then narrowed his eyes as he examined Arthur. They were sat so close that Merlin could smell the faint trace of alcohol on his breath.
“Are you drunk?” He asked.
Arthur laughed. “Noooo.”
“Yes, you are you clotpole!”
“Am not!” Arthur was giggling now and moved closer as though he intended to nudge Merlin’s shoulder playfully. Instead, he fell into Merlins side, letting his entire weight rest against Merlin.
“You’re such an idiot.” Merlin mumbled and he took out his phone to call Morgana. “Does your sister know where you are?” He asked, thinking of the anxious Morgana he often saw when Arthur’s location was unknown.
Arthur shook his head and nuzzled against Merlin’s neck. Merlin sighed and held his phone up to his ear.
“Merlin?” Morgana answered.
“Yeah, sorry um I’m with Arthur.”
“Really? Where are you?” She asked and then there were voices in the background and the faint rustle of coats and keys.
“School car park. He sort of just approached me.”
Morgana sighed in relief. “Is he okay?”
“He’s a bit drunk.”
“Oh.” Morgana tensed again. “Does anything else seem off? He’s just drunk right?”
“As far as I’m aware he’s just drunk.”
“Okay. Thank you, Merlin. We’re on our way to get him now.”
Morgana cut off the line quickly and Merlin shoved his phone back into his pocket. Arthur was still beside Merlin. Little puffs of his breath warm against the exposed skin of Merlins neck.
“Arthur? Are you okay?” Merlin asked hesitantly.
Arthur let out a tiny whine. “Cold.” He murmured and then shuffled in closer and hid his face against Merlin’s shoulder.
“I know. Morgana will be here shortly, and she’ll get you all warmed up yeah?” Merlin had no idea where the fondness came from. Something about the way Arthur seemed so small beside him. So unlike the same boy who taunted him in the corridors. It was all unfairly adorable especially as a large shiny car pulled up in front of them and Arthur lifted his head and stared blearily into the blinding headlights. Morgana came rushing out followed by an older man Merlin assumed was their father. He held a bundle of blankets under his arm and a bottle of water which he handed Arthur as he crouched down in front of them. Morgana forced Arthur to take a few sips and then their father wrapped a few of the blankets around Arthurs shoulders, rubbing his sons back with such care Merlin was almost jealous.
Arthur allowed them to make a fuss and Merlin scoffed because of course Arthur loved the attention he was getting. Mr Pendragon helped Arthur into the back of the car as Morgana approached Merlin.
“Need a lift?” She asked.
“My Uncle should be here soon.” Merlin said, checking his phone. As he did a message popped up from Gaius. He hadn’t even left work yet. Merlin sighed. “I don’t even live in Camelot.”
“It’s no trouble.” Mr Pendragon piped up as he joined them on the side of the road. “You did look after my boy before we got here and besides that we need to drive around to get the heating properly on anyway. Arthur will freeze if we go straight home.”
Merlin didn’t try to understand any of what he said but Morgana nodded in understanding. “Get in Merlin.” Merlin couldn’t exactly say no.
“Oh, um thank you. Thank you, sir.”
“Uther is fine.” Uther Pendragon smiled warmly and gestured for Merlin to get in the backseat. He was immediately hit by a wave of warm air as he settled in the seat across from Arthur. Arthur was holding the blankets tightly around himself and staring out of the window mindlessly. It had started raining now, plump droplets running down the windows and creating a tinny melody on the roof. Merlin was glad that he wasn’t still sat on the curb waiting for Gaius.
“Ealdor yes?” Uther asked from the front seat.
“Yes please.”
“Haven’t been to Ealdor for a very long time.”
“I struggle to believe you’ve ever been to Ealdor.” Morgana scoffed as she fiddled with the radio. Uther ignored her. Some gentle music started playing at a very quiet volume, Merlin could just about hear it over the hum of the engine and the patter of the rain.
Merlin sat in content, watching the countryside pass the window as they left the city. Until he felt something soft slump into his side, and he turned abruptly to get a mouthful of fluffy blonde hair. Arthur had shuffled along the seat until he could lean his head on Merlin’s shoulder. Merlin should have been worried about the seatbelt situation but right in that moment he felt he could be forgiven for being thrown off his usual axis.
Arthur was like a hot water bottle and Merlin watched as he yawned and pulled the blankets up to his nose, eyes closed as he dosed. There wasn’t much Merlin could do in response, but he thought over his actions carefully before deciding that wrapping one arm around Arthur to keep him close was a completely platonic gesture.
Anyway, he and Arthur were not friends. Arthur was just drunk and cold. He wasn’t aware of what he was doing.
~ ♛ ~
Arthur was absent the next day. Morgana said he was sleeping after waking up with a cold. Merlin rolled his eyes. Of course, Arthur was the type of person to slack off school just because he had the sniffles. Part of Merlin couldn’t help but imagine how adorable Arthur would be curled up in bed, nose red and sore. He pushed the thought away as Gwen came to sit beside him in History.
“You met Uther Pendragon last night?!” She hissed like it was a secret.
“Um yes?”
Merlin frowned when she only gaped at him.
“What’s he like?”
If possible, Merlin’s frown deepened further.
“Surely you don’t need to ask that. You’ve been Morgana’s friend for—"
“Seven years mhmm. And no, I’ve never met him.”
“How?”
“Uther Pendragon is a very wealthy businessman. He’s barely ever seen outside of his office block. Even when I’ve been round Morgana’s house, I’ve never seen him. He only ever makes an effort with partners Morgana and Arthur are serious about.” Merlin found all this difficult to believe after last night. Gwen made Uther sound like some stuck-up rich man who didn’t care much about anything that wasn’t his business. But last night Merlin had seen an Uther who cared enough to drop everything to pick up his son. Who then turned up in joggers and an expensive looking coat far from the picture Gwen was describing.
“I think he was just grateful that I’d looked after Arthur.” Merlin shrugged.
“Arthur?! Hang on a second… you were with Arthur? Morgana never mentioned Arthur being involved.”
Merlin just opened and closed his mouth again unsure how to answer. Thankfully he was saved by the teacher who entered the classroom and distracted Gwen with essay results.
~ ♛ ~
Merlin wasn’t sure what the bubble of happiness he felt when he saw Arthur at his locker the next day was, but it was immediately burst when Arthur turned on him with dark eyes. Merlin had planned to greet him with something cheerful but one look from Arthur warned him not to. So, he opened his locker and busied himself with his books, fully aware of Arthurs eyes on him. In the end Merlin decided he couldn’t ignore it any longer.
“Are you feeling better today?” He asked. Arthur flinched in surprise at being addressed. Then he just nodded, slammed Merlin’s locker shut in his face and stormed off. Merlin sighed. He wasn’t sure he’d ever understand Arthur.
The next time Merlin saw Arthur was a few hours later. He was on his way to lunch when he passed the blonde walking the opposite direction. It was clear that Arthur was purposely avoiding looking at him. However, it was difficult for Arthur to hide from him when Merlin was a good centimetre taller than him. Not much but Merlin counted it as a small victory against Arthur.
Noticing that Arthur was ignoring him, Merlin manoeuvred himself so that he would knock into Arthur’s shoulder and then make it out to be an accident. When their shoulders came into contact, a little more violent than Merlin had anticipated if he were being honest, Arthur jumped and the books he’d been carrying fell from his arms.
“I’m so sorry Arthur.” Merlin felt dumb as he just stood there watching as Arthur reached to gather his books back up.
“It’s fine.” He grunted. It obviously was not.
“Are you not coming to lunch?” Merlin took the opportunity to ask.
Arthur shook his head. “I’m going home. Don’t feel great.” He said and as if on cue, turned to cough.
“You don’t look great.” Merlin frowned. Arthur shrugged and they just stood there for a moment, staring at each other awkwardly. “Well… um make sure to let Morgana know that’s what you’re doing. You know how worried she gets.”
Arthur rolled his eyes. “Yeah whatever.” Then he moved around Merlin and walked off, head lowered, and body hunched.
Merlin could tell something was up.
~ ♛ ~
It was once again a late night for Merlin in the library. He had yet another history essay to complete and even though he’d been staring at his laptop screen for half an hour now, he could not find it in himself to write another word. Just as he was about to give up, an irritated groan sounded through the silence. Merlin stood and packed his things away before going to investigate. He’d assumed he was the last person still in the library at this time in the evening. It seemed he had been wrong.
As he turned down a row of shelves he came face to face with Arthur.
“Oh! It’s just you.” Merlin sighed. Arthur glared for a moment. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine.” He said just as he had the previous day.
“Right well it didn’t sound like it so forgive me for-”
“Ugh can’t you just move out of my way Merlin!”
“Arth—"
“You’re always here! You’re like a headlouse, you just won’t go away!” Arthur yelled, throwing a book down onto the floor as he did.
“I’m… sorry you feel that way.” Merlin felt his own irritation building. He was only looking out for Arthur. He was worried, gods knew why. Arthur stormed away and Merlin carefully placed the book he’d dumped back on the shelf where it belonged before following him. Arthur was walking fast down the corridor then stopped abruptly when he heard Merlin behind him.
“Why are you always FOLLOWING ME?!” He lashed out angrily. Merlin stopped where he was, shocked by Arthur’s outburst.
“I just want to make sure you’re okay. Please Arthur, calm down.”
“I’m fine.”
“Okay. That’s great but I thought you were fine last week and then you basically passed out on me.”
White hot anger flared in Arthurs eyes and Merlin immediately knew he shouldn’t have brought up that night.
“Just… stop acting like we’re friends! We’re not, okay?!”
“I know we’re not. You’ve made that abundantly clear since I first started at this school!” Merlin replied sharply.
“Good.”
“Good.” As Arthur turned back around, posture defeated but defiant, Merlin immediately felt bad. “You know, I don’t understand why you choose to be such a bully when other people are around.”
Arthur didn’t stop walking until he was outside. Merlin kept his distance but also a very close eye on the blonde because he wasn’t sure he trusted Arthur in this mindset.
When Merlin did admit defeat and exited the building, he found Arthur curled in on himself, sat exactly where they had the previous week, head in his hands. Merlin wasn’t sure how to react until he got closer and realised Arthur was bawling his eyes out. Instinct kicked in and Merlin fell beside him and pulled him against his chest.
He wasn’t exactly sure what to say so he just held Arthur in silence. It was strange how normal it felt to hug Arthur. And for Arthur to hug him back. Arthur sobbed into Merlin’s shoulder, clutching at the back of his shirt.
When Arthur had calmed down, he shifted slightly so that he was still leaning against Merlin’s shoulder, Merlin absentmindedly rubbing his back.
“What’s wrong Arthur?” Merlin finally asked, gently. Arthur stared at his hands, playing with the rings on his fingers. “I know I haven’t known you very long, but you can always talk to me.”
Arthur nodded and sighed. “My mum died two years ago today.” Merlin squeezed Arthur’s shoulder but didn’t interrupt. “After that I ended up in a bad place. My father distanced himself and I was pretty much alone. So, I started going out more, drinking and… drugs. It got really bad until… until I ended up in hospital and dad suddenly realised it wasn’t just him who was struggling.”
Arthur took a deep breath. “He’s been amazing since then. He’s always there if we need him and he puts me and Morgana before anything else. It’s just… sometimes I fall into these slumps again. Particularly around this time of year.”
“I’m so sorry.” Merlin whispered. “That’s completely understandable.”
“I also… tend to fall back into these habits when I’m confused over something.”
“What’s confused you?”
“You.”
Merlin just stared. Now he was confused. But the glint in Arthurs eyes was undeniable. He just couldn’t work out why.
“What do you mean me?” Merlin murmured. Arthur was so close he didn’t need to raise his voice any louder. They stared for a long aching moment until Arthur just blinked and surged forwards.
Their lips touched ever so delicately, and Merlin sank into Arthur’s touch as his rough hands came to rest on Merlin’s cheek.
Merlin hadn’t expected his touch to be so gentle. But it was. It was the gentlest caress Merlin had ever felt.
Arthur pulled back first, and Merlin chased the kiss. He never wanted it to end. Arthurs eyes were wide and glistening and Merlin smiled softly. He caught a few of Arthurs run away tears with the pad of his thumb and watched until a tiny smile graced Arthurs lips.
For the first time Merlin felt like he was truly seeing Arthur. Even in the light of a streetlamp alone, Merlin felt his breath catch at the realisation of what was happening. This was real and true and beautiful.
“I’m sorry.” Arthur whispered.
Merlin nuzzled Arthur’s forehead with his own. “Don’t be.”
“I mean for everything. I can be a lot to take sometimes.”
“Hey, no don’t think that.”
“You of all people have had to bear with me at my worst.”
Merlin hummed quietly and smiled weakly. “Maybe. But I seem to have become quite fond of you over the last couple of weeks.”
“Really?” Arthur asked, and it was so full of hope that it made Merlin chuckle fondly. Merlin nodded and kissed Arthur again. When they pulled away Arthur tucked himself in at Merlins side and Merlin joined their hands.
Merlin could feel how tense Arthur still was as they huddled together on the curb for warmth.
“Something’s still wrong.” He said.
Arthur just shook his head. “I miss my mum.” Merlin squeezed Arthurs hands tighter.
“Is there anything I can do?”
Arthur was silent a moment. “Can you…”
“Hmm?” Merlin prompted, tucking a few strands of Arthurs hair behind his ear.
“Can you call Morgana?”
“Of course.” Merlin murmured and nuzzled Arthur’s cheek with his nose.
“And…” Arthur was hesitant. “And can you come home with me? I don’t want to be alone.”
“Of course.” Merlin repeated and took his phone shakily from his pocket. His fingers were numb from the cold as he swiped through his contacts to find Morgana.
She answered quickly, just as before.
“Merlin! I was about to call you! Arthur hasn’t come home yet, and he isn’t answering his phone.” Arthur snuggled in further when Merlin turned to send him an accusing glance.
“He’s fine Morgs. I’m with him now actually. Could you pick us up?”
“I’ll let father know and we’ll be straight there.”
“Nothing has happened honestly there’s no need to panic anyone. He’s just a little down.”
“Oh.” Morgana sighed with relief. “Well, we’ll be there shortly. Thank you, Merlin.”
“I don’t mind.” Merlin smiled down the phone. Arthur’s warmth beside him was all worth it anyway. Morgana said goodbye and ended the call and Merlin entangled his cold fingers with Arthurs again.
“Father’s going to be so disappointed.” Arthur sighed, voice thick.
“I’m sure he’ll just be happy to see you safe. You worry them both you know?”
Arthur didn’t reply. Merlin allowed the silence to hang over them comfortably.
“They worry too much sometimes.” He finally said. “It’s not like they don’t know where I am. They force me to keep my location on so they can track me on Snapchat maps.”
“Your dad has Snapchat?” Merlin asked incredulously.
“Yep.” Arthur grumbled.
“He clearly cares a lot more than you realise.” Merlin murmured. Arthur grunted softly in return. “What about me? Can I have your Snapchat so I can stalk you too?”
“I thought you were too much of a country bumpkin nerd to even know what that is.” Arthur teased though this time it was not unkind. Merlin rolled his eyes and handed his phone over to Arthur who opened the app and added himself.
“Cute.” Merlin grinned. “Oh! It’s your birthday?” He asked as he noticed the birthday cake beside Arthur’s name.
Arthur looked away and Merlin’s heart dropped at the realisation. He had no words for it, so he wrapped his arms tightly around Arthur and pressed his face into his neck.
“It’s okay.” Merlin murmured. Of course, it wasn’t but Merlin had no clue how to comfort Arthur. He was so complicated, and Merlin didn’t want to say the wrong thing. Not now.
A car pulled up as Merlin was having these thoughts and he nudged Arthur to get his attention. It was like some strange déjà vu as Uther and Morgana Pendragon hurried out of the car towards them. Arthur didn’t look up straight away and it was only as Merlin began to help him stand that he did. Uther took his son into his arms and hugged him tightly. Merlin felt emotional just watching the tenderness of it all. He knew how Arthur felt. It was so hard to lose a parent when you were still so young. Morgana noticed and wrapped an arm around Merlin.
“Come home for some dinner?” She offered with a small smile. “I know Arthur would like that.”
Merlin looked unsure. Sure, Arthur had offered it but…
“I can promise hot chocolate.” She sang and Merlin agreed with a snort.
He got into the back of the car with Arthur and wrapped them both up in blankets. Arthur rested his head on Merlin’s shoulder, but his eyes didn’t stray from the window. They pulled up outside a large town house and Arthur led him through the front door and into a large living room.
It was already decorated for Christmas, a huge sparkling tree in the corner of the room and foliage covering the mantel piece where an array of birthday cards sat. It seemed strangely out of place. Merlin wasn’t used to mixing birthdays and Christmas since his was several months before.
“It’s a buffet for dinner as tradition.” Morgana smiled. Finally, Arthur smiled back. He was looking adorably flushed now that Merlin could see him in the soft glow of the living room light. Merlin wasn’t sure how close he could be with Arthur for now, so he allowed Arthur to initiate everything.
Uther appeared with two mugs and handed one to Merlin and one to Arthur. He guided his son to the sofa and sat down beside him. “Are you okay?” He asked as he pressed the back of his hand to Arthur’s cheeks and forehead, smoothing back his hair in such a tentative gesture it made Merlins heart soft.
Arthur nodded into his hot chocolate and Uther’s features relaxed. “We can eat whenever you want to.” He smiled. Then he turned to Merlin. “You can stay as long as you’d like to and I’m happy to take you home later on.”
Merlin caught Morgana smirking from beside him. “Oh um, thank you. That’s very kind.”
Uther smiled knowingly. “I’m glad Arthur has a friend.”
“I have lots of friends.” Arthur grumbled.
“We all know you don’t little bro.” Morgana laughed, ruffling his hair as she collapsed down beside him. Uther stood and then beckoned for Morgana’s help in another room. Once they were gone Arthur gestured for Merlin and he came to sit down next to him, curling his legs up beneath him.
“I never know how but… I think they both know.” Arthur whispered.
“Hmm. Is that okay?”
“Of course. They’re the best.” Arthur smiled wistfully. “Are you okay with that?”
Merlin thought for a moment. “Yeah.” He responded. Then he giggled and kissed Arthur’s nose as Arthur wrapped both arms around Merlins middle and snuggled up to him.
~ ♛ ~
“I hear you spent Friday evening with Arthur.” Gwen said with suspicion as she caught him by his locker on Monday morning.
Merlin shrugged, faking nonchalance.
“Merlin!” She exclaimed in a hushed tone. “What is going on? Stop hiding things from me.”
“Why don’t you ask Morgana?”
“You know she won’t tell me.” Gwen whined. Then her tone changed entirely. “Ooooh.”
“What—" Before Merlin could finish his sentence he was ambushed by two familiar arms wrapping around his shoulders.
“Hey nerd.” Arthur whispered, pressing a very quick kiss to his cheek. Arthur wasn’t all for the public affection and Merlin was with him there but occasionally when there weren’t many people around Arthur couldn’t help it.
“Hey you.” Merlin replied at Arthurs grin. Gwen was trying not to smile and probably squeal for Merlin to spill everything.
“Guinevere.” Arthur nodded in greeting. “Looking radiant as ever.”
Gwen rolled her eyes, but she was smiling. “Arthur Albert Henry Alexander Pendragon.” She addressed him.
Merlin guffawed. “That’s your full name?” Arthur nodded. “You posh prat.”
“Be honest, you love it.” Arthur smirked.
Merlin shook his head fondly. “Of course I do, why are you looking at us like that?” Merlin asked as he caught Gwen’s expression.
“No reason. Will you be joining the rest of us for lunch today?”
Merlin opened his mouth to answer but Arthur beat him to it. “Actually, I thought I might take Merlin out since we both have frees this afternoon. If you would like that of course.” Arthur turned his head to Merlin.
“Sounds intriguing.” Merlin agreed. “But I will need to be back in the library to revise later on because I do have a history test tomorrow.”
“Of course.” Arthur grinned fondly.
Gwen was still smiling. “Cute. Well, we should get going Merls we’ve got a history test to prepare for after all.”
“I’ll see you later.” Merlin said as Arthur released him from his embrace.
“Let me walk you.” Arthur offered.
“Just—" Merlin put a hand to his chest. “Make sure you get to your class on time, okay? I’ll meet you outside after third period. You know where.”
“I’ll be there.” Arthur gave Merlin his signature crooked grin again before brushing past his shoulder and walking in the opposite direction.
“I can’t believe what a few months can do.” Merlin sighed thoughtfully.
“Oh, this was all you Merls.” Gwen said with confidence. “You’ve brought out this part of Arthur he’s always kept hidden. I’m glad. He’s such a lovely person inside. He deserves someone like you.”
“Hmm.” Gwen began to giggle, and Merlin couldn’t help but join in. “So, is that really his full name?”
“Pfft shut up and tell me everything.”
· ♩ ̩̩̥͙＊*•♬ ̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙ ♪*˚♩♬˚*•̩̩͙✩•♪ ̩̩͙*˚＊·♩ ̩̩̥͙ *