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The Peak Lords had all assembled and were talking happily amongst themselves, seemingly content to never let the meeting start. Even Liu Qingge seemed at ease, chatting civilly with a Bai Zhan Lord with Yue Qingyuan at his side. Despite the light atmosphere, Luo Binghe was brooding. Sulking, really, though he’d never admit it. But in his mind, he had a good reason.
The only ones missing were Peak Lord Shen and Peak Lord Shang, and his Shizun’s absence burned at Luo Binghe. The idea of his Shizun off alone with that man had him seething with jealousy, gritting his teeth. If it was any other person, he’d probably be fine, but it was Shang Qinghua . The man that Shizun was always pulling to the side and whispering conspiratorially with, getting into animated discussions that fell quiet when Binghe approached, touching each other so casually, Shizun allowing Shang Qinghua to cower behind him with little more than an eye roll. Shang Qinghua addressed Shen Qingqiu so casually, like he had any right to him, and the strange dialect the two slipped into when together was indecipherable, but Shizun seemed to understand it perfectly, even relaxing as they spoke, and Binghe hated it. He hated Shang Qinghua. If he didn’t respect Mobei Jun so much, the cowardly peak lord would have been dead and in pieces years ago.
Binghe’s darkening thoughts were interrupted as the muffled sound of laughter echoed down the hall, drawing everyone’s attention. The door to the hall opened, and the gathered lords let their conversations taper off, but Binghe perked up. It was Shizun! And... Shang Qinghua. Of course. It seemed like the mousy man was always lurking around Shizun like a shadow. But there was nothing mousy in his demeanor now, the strange confidence he always gained around Shizun clear as day as they laughed loudly together. The two of them argued frequently, but they had some kind of bond that Binghe couldn’t understand, and it drove him wild sometimes. Even now, just seeing them together, he wanted to snatch Shizun away from him and squirrel him away where no one would ever steal him.
But...
He’d never seen Shizun laugh like this. Full-belly laughter, loud and raucous and unrestrained, powerful enough to make him stumble as they walked. Shang Qinghua was in much the same state, though his laughter, to Luo Binghe at least, was significantly less rapturous. Binghe wasn’t the only one entranced by this rare sight; the entire meeting hall had gone silent, all eyes on the oblivious newcomers, who still hadn’t noticed their audience.
“Wha-How would it even happen like that?” Shizun laughed, face flushed and eyes teary with laughter, and god he was so unfairly beautiful it made Binghe’s heart ache with want, “What do you even do in that situation?”
“Right!? So I’m losing my mind like ‘yooooo, what?’” Shang Qinghua grinned, clearly continuing some kind of story, “And this doped-up Pennywise-looking motherfucker looks me dead in the eyes-“ he took a pause to get ahold of himself, trying and failing to get a handle on his glee. Any other time, Luo Binghe would be curious about just how amusing this story must be, but he was too busy fuming over the way Shizun seemed to eagerly cling to Shang Qinghua’s every word, “-and he says, totally straight, ‘You want penis enlargement pills?’”
A few lords gasped, scandalized, but the two of them didn’t hear as Shang Qinghua descended into uncontrollable cackling again, and Luo Binghe didn’t have time to startle at the vulgarity of the tale, far too distracted with the way Shizun lost it. He doubled over, his hair spilling artfully over his heaving shoulders as he struggled to remain standing. His bright and unrestrained joy echoed through the hall, bringing a slightly dazed smile to Yue Qingyuan’s face and a flush to Liu Qingge’s. The two of them seemed only to find more amusement when Shen Qingqiu accidentally ran into the doorframe, clinging to it as if to stay upright.
“Oh shit, careful Spongebob.” Shang Qinghua cackled between gasps for air, “We don’t want your man to show up and destroy that innocent doorframe.”
“Everything Binghe does is your fault anyway!” he laughed. The words meant no sense to Binghe, and a glance around showed similar confusion on the faces of the other Lords, but Shang Qinghua only clutched his stomach and slapped Shen Qingiu’s back. Binghe saw red, but he managed to restrain himself from leaping forward and slashing the man’s throat.
“You are responsible for at least fifty percent of his lunacy, bro.” Shang Qinghua grinned, “And you’d cry if he was still all murdery and shit.”
“If anything ever happened to Luo Binghe, I would kill everyone on this mountain and then myself.” Shen Qingqiu laughed, the declaration warming Binghe’s heart and unsettling the others in attendance, “But at least he’ll never make me deal with crackheads in the sewers. At least I hope no-“ The words died in his throat when he looked up and realized that they were not alone. Shang Qinghua followed his gaze, and the two of them froze in place, identical expressions of wide-eyed shock flashing across their faces. They resembled two junior disciples who had been caught sneaking alcohol after hours. It was a strange look for two dignified peak lords, though Binghe was charmed.
“We uh... didn’t realize you were all... already here...” Shang Qinghua swallowed audibly, “Um... Ah…” His face had gone red, body visibly quaking with embarrassment and fear. In comparison, Shizun was pale as a jade statue, and just as still as one. It was like he hoped he could turn invisible and escape.
“There’s a good explanation for this.” Shen Qingqiu said, making a visible attempt to collect himself.
“Yup!” Shang Qinghua nodded rapidly, “A great explanation! Uh... bro, what’s the explanation that we totally have?”
“The explanation is...” Shen Qingqiu said, “Is um... You see, it started when we-“ and then he whipped around and bolted, Shang Qinghua hot on his heels. The two of them fled like bats out of the Abyss, heedless of the indignant shouts behind them. Binghe shouted, leaping up and charging off after them, not wanting to be at this useless meeting without Shizun.
“Shizun! Wait for me!” he wailed.
“Hey, get back here!” Liu Qingge yelled from far behind him, audibly fuming, “Don’t just run from your problems, Shizun!” Luo Binghe laughed brightly as he left them all behind, eager to catch up to Shizun.
“Bro, we are dead!” Shang Qinghua’s voice, already winded, came from a way ahead of him, “Totally dead! We’re gonna have to change our names and move to Tibet!”
“I know!” Shizun snapped, “Just keep running, they’ll forget eventually!” Binghe smiled, warmth permeating his chest. His Shizun was so cute. Maybe one day Binghe would be able to bring out that side of him, and then Shang Qinghua would no longer be needed.
But that would come later. For now, Binghe’s goal was to catch up to him and sweep Shen Qingqiu into his arms.