Chapter Text
Taeslir was recovering slower although he had first regained a somewhat normal conscious state. Exactly that level of recuperating had, however, brought Yppha’s role of guarding someone upon Deengar, because while the other could finally relax with Liu regaining their strength, if so slowly and in dragging manner, Taeslir kept Deengar awake with him. He cried out his name whenever his eyes opened, and as he was giving his all in restraining himself from clawing at him, he exhausted himself until his screams died in his throat.
Deengar endured it. Holding him locked between his arms, hardly hissing when Taeslir’s claws sank into him, he waited until his painful screams reduced to a tremble.
It appeared a circle; while everyone thought he was recovering, some words had even flowed between them, his chances reduced with every new scratch that appeared on Deengar’s arm.
They decided to search for a different solution; Radeel wanted to examine the root of his sickness. He concluded from his own experience of past dying, decaying, comrades that their means of providing a certain, necessary liquid was at fault.
His memory and some documents he had looked through described two opposing scenarios; either a vampire drank more than enough blood, stilling an imaginative thirst that appeared unsatiable, or their throat didn’t touch a single drop of fresh blood. Both scenarios usually let the vampire turn feral. Their sanity would crumble with the irresistible hunger for blood, and they couldn’t still it in any way.
To say they were usually living along a balanced path somewhere in the middle of those phenomena would’ve been a lie. Blandly put, no middle passage existed anywhere around the higher ranks of the regime. Their rank allowed them to swagger around excess, while everyone else was urged toward the other end. That’s why their numbers had been threatened at larger scale for years now. Even after they’d decided to reduce their own consumption, the decline was long past saving.
Now, regarding Taeslir’s condition, they had provided him with stored, cold blood alone. Taeslir’s usual blood-intake had reduced in minimal time, while he was injured on top, and he had slipped. Slipped so dangerously quickly and to an extent that Radeel had needed to express his conclusion to Deengar.
He'd die if he didn’t get his lips on some fresh blood.
Deengar almost jumped out the door with that.
Radeel held him back and pushed reason to his senses. To let Taeslir suck on a living human would decrease their already low and falling numbers of resources. Deengar complained and needed to restrain himself from pointing his claws at Radeel. Still, despite his words of how such a sacrifice wasn’t justified when they were talking about Taeslir, Radeel denied him. He’d need to get Taeslir in better shape, he said. If he wasn’t to pose a threat to the person he’d drink from, Radeel might think about it again.
It had been another two days since that conversation.
Liu had advised them to use some untrustworthy potions from their cabinet, and after Yppha had forcibly persuaded them to leave the topic to Deengar, they lay their own mind to rest again.
Lou had observed their proceedings from the back row – a back row so far from them that guilt bubbled up in his mix of emotions. He had stored them away at his inability of helping them, trying to reduce the agonizing hunch of uselessness that burned in his chest.
He had tried offering his blood, but Radeel had denied him. They’d find another way, he had said. He also said, later to Yppha that day, that Taeslir’s chances of not killing the human were higher if the victim was somewhat trusting and calm. – Still, Lou wasn’t granted a single thought.
At least he hadn’t been ignored as Radeel went to Lax, who had returned from some errand, and asked for his opinion.
Lou waited outside while they were talking in Lax’ room. He had decided on an answer anyway; no matter Radeel’s response and the punishment he’d receive should their views not correspond; he’d walk upstairs to Taeslir tonight.
Yppha joined him shortly before the door of Lax’ room opened. He was faster in rushing toward Radeel and quickly asked for the outcome of their discussion.
Radeel didn’t respond as his gaze and head stayed lowered to the floor. Just Yppha’s touch on his arm made him raise his head.
’Lax said – he said there’s…,’ Radeel mumbled, but his voice faded as he wiped Yppha’s hand off his arm.
His eyes flew shut for a deep breath. When he opened them again, he stared down at Yppha, his gaze distant. ’He’ll need some blood. Since he can’t kill the provider, there won’t be enough to completely heal his condition.’
They’d still need to do it, Yppha exclaimed and flinched as Radeel slapped away his hand.
Lou quickly rushed to Yppha’s side. ’If I do it, he’ll be able to drink a tiny bit more than with someone else.’
Yppha raised an eyebrow as he turned to him. ‘When did Liu tell you that?’
Lou looked at him, but quickly fled the bright yellow dots. He fumbled with his fingers when he raised his voice again, ‘I just recall them rambling about my body reacting differently if I offer myself…’
’I can’t remember them rambling about something of that sort when they explained their success of your ritual,’ Yppha responded, oblivious of the tremble Lou was hiding by crossing his arms.
’Then, maybe, they just phrased it differently, but I’m sure I’ll be of help.’
His breathing had strengthened when he looked at Yppha again, but he relaxed as the colour in his eyes was warmer.
He sighed despite the warmness in his glance. ’It’s either got to be you or someone else anyway. Radeel, what do – ’
’I don’t care!’ he yelled, his hand flinching away from Yppha as if he had anticipated a touch. When his glance fell on Yppha’s hands, unchanged in their position far away from him, he calmed himself with an exhale. ‘Just don’t let him die.’
He rushed to his room, Lou and Yppha glancing after him. Even after he had disappeared, their glances lingered in the hallway leading to his room.
Yppha disrupted their stare eventually, telling Lou to decide. He didn’t know what else to do.
Lou glanced after him until he left into his room, not pondering on the thoughts trying to torment him anew.
As his legs carried him upstairs, his thoughts started racing after all. He couldn’t give Yppha what he wanted. No matter how much the throb in his chest hurt with every step and how afraid he was at their descriptions of what Taeslir might do to him, he just couldn’t. He wanted to help them and, even more, he needed to remedy what he had done to Taeslir.
He had tried to tell himself he couldn’t have known better and that the technique he had used wasn’t at fault for Taeslir’s condition. If he had done something, he’d saved him. – But the thought was too praising to fit into his head.
When he stood in front of Deengar’s room, his hands were trembling, and his throat felt itchy. The wait after his knock felt too long, while his heart would’ve appreciated another couple of throbs. His voice was weak as he explained the situation to Deengar.
’Don’t be stupid, he’ll instantly kill you,’ he mumbled, his lips curling in anger. Yet his temper was crushingly crushingly exceeded by the exhaustion dripping off his words.
Stubbornly as Lou had planned to behave, his denial didn’t align with Deengar’s expected answer. His eyes widened before he looked back at Taeslir. With his glance returning, he stepped out of the room, leaving a crack between door and frame.
His expression darkened as he looked down on Lou. ’You count to the livestock down in the basement just as well, and Radeel told me not to use them. So, don’t think you’re something special just because we know your name.’
Lou repeated what Radeel had said down in the hall, and Deengar’s angered expression dropped a little. Since his anger was stronger than his confusion, his denying glance didn’t take long to re-manifest. As he took a breath, he dug his claws into the wooden doorframe, directly next to Lou’s chest. His confusion wasn’t strong enough to conquer it and he quickly strengthened his glance another time.
For a second, he wanted to falter. But a screeched hiss slithered through the door, and his head turned.
Deengar’s deadly gesture instantly fell.
Lou feared his ears were bleeding and brought a hand up to lightly push against them. He had heard pained screams before, during their attack on his village too, but nothing was like the noise that had pierced his mind just now. It stung in his forehead, and his stomach churned when he thought to go nauseous all of a sudden.
The hiss was quieter than a scream, but the fear inside the trembling push of air had sounded so near that Lou thought he himself had produced the noise. His heart ached when he noticed his pulse quickening.
– Taeslir had howled in agony.
Mortal agony.
Lou threw a helpless glance at Deengar, hoping he’d find rescue. He didn’t meet his eyes as Deengar had pressed his fingers against the bridge of his noise. He pushed them against his forehead, trying to be secretive about the sting in his own forehead, and lowered the hand with a sigh.
He moved quickly, through the door and back inside, but Lou caught the expression on his face. His anger had flown away. The expression looked like something he hadn’t seen him wear before. And though it appeared mostly tired and a little pained, an urgency clearly glinted in his eyes.
Lou stepped inside to prove his assumption; Deengar was sitting on his bed, his body bent over Taeslir as one arm stemmed against the mattress, another against Taeslir’s shoulder. He was whispering some words of comfort, but raised his volume when Taeslir didn’t react.
Lou felt his brows shift closer as he caught Deengar’s voice. With the pitch higher than usual, his words possessed an unusual gentleness.
Deengar flinched as Taeslir threw his claws into his arm, but made no sound. They were both breathing heavily. Taeslir couldn’t catch a hold on any of his breaths, his chest turning into a quailing surface, and Deengar’s breathing heightened the longer he failed to calm him.
When he finally did, he allowed his eyes to close, and he quieted. Taeslir was still trembling when Lou decided to close the door.
Sweat glistened on his forehead and his arms as both places were again covered in skin. But it was paler than his usually darker skin tone.
Taeslir was eyeing the wound on Deengar’s arm, blood slowly drooling out and falling to the top sheets that were bloodied and soaked with sweat. He had sat up, and eyed the bloody marks around him like he had forgotten where he was. And why he needed to be here.
When Lou stepped closer, perhaps out of curiosity or the lack of a reaction, Taeslir hissed and turned away. Halting, Lou’s body snapped backward, and he brought up his hands.
Deengar threw a repulsed look at him before he placed his hands on Taeslir again, keeping him from jumping off the bed.
’What’s he doing here?’
Taeslir’s voice sounded awfully different. Lou almost caught himself requesting him to repeat himself since the sound appeared so strange to him.
He wondered if he had ever been that slim. His muscles had certainly been at least somewhat defined. As Taeslir turned another time, his arms moved out from under Deengar’s. He placed them on the mattress on the other side, his back facing Lou. By trying to push himself up, his spine pressed against his back, the thin blouse hardly covering the bones unnaturally pressing against his skin.
He threw another glance at Lou when he gave up and decided to rest in this slumped position. His eyes were veiled behind a dull, grey film that absorbed and prevented any colour from sparkling. His lips were missing their youthful, healthy pink shade.
Lou hadn’t quite understood Radeel when he had said Taeslir would rot away in front of their eyes didn’t they act. Now, the term seemed an understatement. The burns had healed and left no marks, neither so on Taeslir’s hair that fell over his shoulder, unbound and messy. But what had vanished with them was his essence.
’He wants you to drink from him,’ Deengar answered and decided to move his hands under Taeslir’s arm and over his back. He was trembling against the mattress, and Deengar was sure not to let him fall.
He’d kill him, Taeslir responded, and Deengar clarified, he had said the same. Lou piped in as well when a decision on Taeslir’s part seemed to form and claimed his complete consent with the idea and assured him, he had been the one who had come up with it.
’That makes it even more stupid – even stupider,’ Taeslir said, confusedly correcting himself, and requested Deengar to get him out.
Lou panicked and stepped forward. ’I won’t! You need it. Radeel said you’d die if you don’t drink and here I am, full bag of blood. Just..’
He fell silent as Deengar raised his hand.
Taeslir’s strength vanished against his shaking muscles, and Deengar caught him. Leaning him against the pillow, he grabbed him by both his arms, but Taeslir jerked his head away from Lou. His claws dug into the mattress, and one hand lifted to cling to Deengar’s arm.
’I don’t want your blood,’ he forced out between gasped breaths and winced when Lou decreased their distance by another step.
‘I don’t believe you.’
Another step forced a sob from Taeslir’s lips, and his grasp on Deengar’s arm tightened.
Deengar’s free hand pressed against Lou’s chest, and Lou caught his glare, the colour piercing his muscles like a needle. He couldn’t take another step.
Deengar sighed when he glanced back at Taeslir, who was giving his all in not tearing Lou apart. Maybe, he’d have shredded him, hadn’t Deengar’s hand pressed down on his arm.
’I’ll hate myself for this’, he mumbled, let go of Lou, and placed his fingers on the side of Taeslir’s jaw. ’I agree with him, Tae.’
Even little pressure sufficed to make Taeslir’s head turn.
’Don’t lie’, he snapped in response. ’Be realistic, I could possibly –’
’I am. You won’t hurt him.’ He smiled weakly. ’If someone has enough strength to pull something like this during a time like this, then it’s you.’
Their eyes stayed bound to each other even after Deengar’s hand had slipped off and moved to Taeslir’s hand.
Taeslir’s glance flickered down at some point, striking their connected fingers. He seemed calmer when he glanced back up. His voice wasn’t shaking anymore as he doubtingly asked if Lou trusted him with his life. He eyed him for a good minute after his nod, eyes travelling to the spot of his hunger. His teeth started chattering, and he firmly bit down on his bottom lip.
’Fine, but if I can’t stop, you’ll force me off him,’ Taeslir agreed and glanced at Deengar.
’When your fangs got a grip, I couldn’t get you off him in any –’
’There’s one way.’
’No,’ Deengar refused with a disbelieving laugh. He was serious; that technique would harm him more than this proceeding could possibly heal him. However, Taeslir likewise didn’t joke in this matter.
’Either you agree, or I won’t do it.’
He stared at Deengar for a moment longer and won with a sigh. It was a dissatisfied, but honest approval.
Taeslir held his hand out to Lou. He wasn’t looking at him, his fingers cold, sweaty, and trembling when they wrapped around him.
Lou held his breath as he sat down next to him, his fist in his lap. Watching as Taeslir brought his wrist to his lips, hearing him gulp one tiny drop of blood from his veins. The grip tightening around his arm.
He yelped at him throwing his hand away, a hiss carrying Taeslir’s body over his, teeth persistently clinging to his neck. His glance on the ceiling, he couldn’t fight against the harsh push against his arm, a sting in his muscles at the side Taeslir was sucking from him.
Something was thumping inside his ears as he tried to pull his other hand free, awkwardly wiggling it out from beneath him, Deengar’s silhouette swimming away in the corner of his eye. His hand felt heavy. He couldn’t grasp him. Too much warmth radiated from his neck.
His fingers only brushed Taeslir’s ponytail, tracing past his neck, before his hand fell to the floor.
His vision blurred when he could finally breath again, Taeslir’s body off his, though no breath felt strong enough. His head dipped to the side as his hand couldn’t raise his hand to his neck.
‘I told you to stop me!’
The noise ached, but Lou’s muscles chased after it. His eyes meeting a blurry picture of Taeslir sitting against the bedframe.
‘He told me not to!’ Deengar yelled back at him, quickly leaning over Lou to gently pull him up by the neck and shoulder. ‘…was begging me not to.’
He didn’t remember opening his lips.
‘Well, he certainly didn’t have a say in this!’ Taeslir hissed as he leaned forward, his hand trying to reach for Lou.
He halted when Lou’s glance shot at him. He smiled weakly. ‘You sound like yourself again.’
Taeslir sank back to his knees, a weak breath escaping him. His glance rose as Deengar picked Lou up, but the bright, green dots, just above smeared lips that had regained their colour, quickly disappeared from Lou’s sight as he carried him out of the room. His temple was burning as he leaned against his collarbone.
’Don’t die on me now,’ Deengar said, hurrying downstairs. ‘I’ll search for something helpful.’
Lou aimlessly mumbled his name, wincing when Deengar threw two doors open, the noise like a dagger in his ear. He sighed when he placed him on the bed inside Liu’s backroom, his vision blurring from the purple light of some candles. Clinging to the commotion outside, he watched Deengar enter the room with some bandages, vials, and some scissors. Half his body illuminated by the light falling through the open door.
Swift fingers wiped at his neck, smearing the blood flowing from the slits on his throat to his collarbone. The cool liquid on the cloth stung. Lou shunned away.
He flinched as Deengar went to his arm instead, pressing a dark piece of fabric against it before slinging some bandages over the wound. Smoothly hiding what would certainly be purple by tomorrow.
They didn’t share any words.
Lou was dizzy and his neck ached. He couldn’t as much as breathe, how should he have pronounced words? (The thought dwelled in his mind a little too long to not worry him when he realised he was drifting off.)
He didn’t notice how Deengar fixed up the bandages with a small pin, he could only listen. Hearken to the noise flowing up to him, a stare piercing the wound on his neck. A glance revealed the hesitance in Deengar’s muscles, eyes glowing with focus as purple irises shrank against blackening pupils.
When Deengar stepped into motion again, the image blurred, Lou’s head too heavy to hold in place. He whined as it fell on his shoulder, the muscles beneath his wound stretching. The room felt too chilly as Deengar teared off the shirt on his left shoulder, wiping some blood off his collarbones. Dripping stains disturbed its whiteness.
He whined when Deengar pushed his cheek aside, holding him by his freezing muscles to wipe the wound clean. Heat stirred up in his gut, his lips silently forming Deengar’s name, his cheek burning with the want to push into his touch.
’Hold still,’ Deengar hissed and pushed Lou’s attempt away.
Grasping determination, Lou’s hand rose from the mattress and clawed at Deengar’s fingers. He swiftly sent them flying with a flick of his hand. He couldn’t work with him shaking like this.
’You’re shaking as well,’ Lou whispered without a thought behind his words.
Deengar pulled his hands away, his face probably twisting in anger, but Lou couldn’t see it. His sight failed him despite the light from Liu’s room sweeping in. Deengar stemmed his hands against the mattress, pushing back to pick up some paste.
As he brushed past Lou’s waist, he whimpered. still haven’t –’
’Don’t even think about suggesting some bullshit offer. Your pulse is barely here any – ’
’That’s not true.’ Lou pushed up, and Deengar’s glance shot to him. He would’ve pulled away, hadn’t Lou’s weak pull on his hand caught him by surprise. He let him guide his hand to his chest, acknowledging the erected heartbeat. It was pumping too fast for Lou’s current appearance. His skin radiated with heat. Deengar’s hand felt like ice.
Lou moved it. Away from his heart and to a more sensitive spot.
‘What the fuck are you doing?’ Deengar snapped at him and fetched him by the wrist. His hand shaking with the loss of touch on him.
‘I don’t know,’ Lou cried and tried to pull back his hand. Instead, it went to Deengar’s blouse and clutched to it. ‘I – My body…wants – ‘
He was leaning forward and clutched his other hand to his throat. Deengar’s glance fell on the strengthless choke around his own larynx. His nails faintly scratched over his skin. He wanted the damned words out of his throat, the painful want out of his mind.
When he looked up at Deengar, he silently screamed at Liu’s sorcery around his heart. He hated it for making Deengar’s glance appear safe and inviting. He damned it when his heart jumped another beat and his fingers crawled off his throat and to Deengar’s shoulder.
‘I need to give it to you,’ he breathed and caught a sob in his throat.
The next instant, he moved up to Deengar’s face. At last second, Deengar pushed him away, throwing his leg over him to keep him at the mattress. Restraining him.
He whimpered when he couldn’t lift his arms.
‘Stop whatever the shit this –‘
‘Please. Please, just drink it,’ Lou cried as his mind regained some sensible thought at being trapped.
He couldn’t pursue what the energy inside of him wanted, his heart only aching stronger as a glance into Deengar’s face revealed saturated purple and a flash of fangs.
He was panting, heavily, his stare a mindless focus, a bright flow surrounding widened pupils. He sucked in a breath as he spotted the marks on Lou’s neck, turning away and shutting his eyes. ‘Lou…’
’I’ll be fine,’ Lou muttered and wanted to add, he couldn’t calm himself any other way, but bit his tongue when Deengar glanced back at him. He didn’t want his breath to falter at the sight.
Deengar’s eyes had never been that shiny, that deadly, that dangerously sparkling. They belonged to a beast, longing for its prey to finally relent and stop fighting for its life.
Just that Deengar wasn’t. Not right now.
He gently squeezed his hand.
Wrapping his other around the back of his neck, nails softly scratching past his scalp, he pulled Lou into place, his lips filled with a command to tell him when to stop.
Lou nodded carefully, his hair ruffling against Deengar’s loose grip. His heart thumping, as if he had jumped laps around the estate, he closed his eyes once Deengar’s fangs pierced him. They froze, so awfully against his heated skin, yet he didn’t feel the need to pull away. His fingers ghostly traced over Deengar’s waist, clawing at his shirt.
He opened his eyes when he heard the sound next to his ear, wet, soft puffs, a careful wait for his blood to ooze out of him, instead of directly sucking it out. Deengar gently traced his thump over Lou’s palm. His breathing had slowed. His body wasn’t shaking anymore.
Lou lowered his hand before speaking up. ‘It’s starting to hurt.’
As Deengar pulled away, he smiled weakly. With strengthened muscles, he pushed himself against the wall, giving Deengar some space to retrieve the remaining supplies. When he glance returned, he froze a little, both eyeing each other. A confused purple meeting Lou’s glassy eyes.
As he wrapped the bandages around the cream he had applied to Lou’s throat, he checked on him with every sling, only continuing once Lou told him they weren’t too tight for him. With a final clip, Deengar got up, throwing the scissors and Lou’s torn shirt on Liu’s bed outside.
His lips carried a question when he peeked back inside.
’I’m just tired, but I’m actually feeling better than before,’ Lou answered and sat up straighter.
’Do you need anything else?’ he asked as he leaned against the doorpost.
’No, just…could you not leave me here, please? I don’t like it if I’m being honest.’
Deengar scanned through the room once before laughing quietly.
’Can’t really blame you’, he admitted and walked toward him. While he picked him up, they agreed on bringing him to Taeslir’s room since Lou had frowned at Deengar suggesting to bring him to Radeel. He explained he had seemed rather upset earlier when he had returned from Lax.
Deengar sighed as they stepped out of Liu’s backroom. ’You know…normally, I wouldn’t even have opened the door to that chamber, but that little rat needed to leave everything in here in their typical mess before we left.’
Lou tried to keep his temple off Deengar’s shoulder. ’Sounds like you don’t like them that much.’
’I wouldn’t say that. They’re just…tiring.’
’I think they’d say something similar about you,’ Lou laughed, but clenched his fingers around Deengar’s shirt when he caught his glance on him.
Deengar turned away with a smile. ’Probably.’
He walked past the door to his room, heading for one at the far-left end.
Taeslir’s room looked like Deengar’s in its structure, but cleaner and with a huge desk and cupboards instead of weapons. After he had put him down and lit a candle, Lou glanced around the light shade of green and beige that painted the walls. His head cocked up when Deengar mumbled, he’d get back to Taeslir.
He didn’t blow out the candle upon Lou’s request, and placed it on a smaller desk to the bed’s side.
‘I’ll leave the door open,’ he added and stepped over the threshold.
Lou had already turned over when Deengar glanced over his shoulder again. ’Lou?’
He hummed in response.
Thank you.
Lou had clearly heard it, even smiled to himself, but with the sleepiest of voices he asked Deengar what he had said, he hadn’t caught it.
’Never mind,’ Deengar laughed. The noise was of such delight Lou had doubted the other could produce it. ’Just go to sleep.’
----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- -----
The walk down the hallway carried itself lighter on Deengar’s shoulders. A silent worry had still clung to him as he couldn’t check on Taeslir, but when he opened the door to his room, it subsided. He smiled faintly and closed it.
Taeslir, in contrast, expressed his disbelief the second he saw him and his recovered state, aghast at how he could’ve taken something from Lou in his state.
Deengar rolled his eyes and pulled his shirt over his head. ’You could really start being nicer, I’m not up for playing your supervisor any longer.’
Throwing his shirt onto a pile of bloodied sheets, he looked on the blood stains he’d carried upstairs with him.
‘Dee?’
He cocked his head at Taeslir’s call, a feigned sigh on his lips as he approached him.
’I’m sorry,’ Taeslir said and pulled Deengar closer to him, pressing his nose into his collarbone. ’He’s so fragile compared to us, and I just…I didn’t mean to –’
Deengar assured him of Lou’s well-being, told him how he had acted, and, yes, he even offered to tell the others to check up on him.
Taeslir hummed and nodded his head, but quickly lost himself in his thoughts as he traced his fingers over Deengar’s arm. They breathed in unison until Taeslir’s fingertips slid over four, line-shaped scratches on Deengar’s shoulder.
Instantly, his glance filled with worry, his lips soon brushed by a gasp as Deengar grabbed him by the jaw.
’Stop acting like some scratches are lethally threatening me.’
He chuckled, but Taeslir’s frown persisted, and he rolled his eyes. ‘I’ll just clean them and they’ll be gone by tomorrow.’
He turned around, walking toward the bathroom at the other side of his room. He could feel Taeslir’s eyes on his before he even raised his voice.
‘I still hurt you.’
Deengar turned around and reached for him again, clenched his fingers around his throat gently, pulled him up to his face. ’It’s not like I’ve never left some marks on you…don’t blame yourself.’
His assurance sounded like an order, and Taeslir fell back against the mattress. He shifted toward the end of the bed and threw the top layer of the sheets to the pile on the floor. Only now, Deengar fully registered that he had cleaned himself and not just wiped the blood from his lips and chin as he had thought.
He scolded himself for the time he had gifted Lou instead of Taeslir, but exhaled and closed his eyes contently at this whole thing working out. He headed for the room attached opposite of the bed, needing to step over the piles of weapons, but froze as the door moved behind him.
Taeslir had opened his lips, without an idea of what they’d pronounce, but they closed upon the intruder, and he turned his head.
Their glances flew to the figure entering, and they too opened their mouth like Taeslir had done. Before a word could drop though, they collapsed and landed in Deengar’s arm. He had rushed back, senses rewarding him with rapidity, and prepared a scold.
Yet, the first verbal interaction began at the other person’s lips.
’Yppha wouldn’t let me up here,’ Liu explained, clinging to Deengar. They hung over his arm, unable to catch their breath.
’Yeah, I get why,’ Deengar answered, pulled them up, and added, he’d bring them back down.
’But I want to check on Taeslir.’
’You’d better check on yourself first. How could you help him if – ’
’Deengar,’ Taeslir interrupted him, his eyes glistening. ‘Please.’
Deengar huffed, but pulled Liu into his arms. He sighed once more and carried them over to the bed.
They clearly couldn’t have walked on their own, but as Deengar dropped them to the bed, they jumped at Taeslir, curled into his chest, and slung their arms around his waist. It looked painful, but Taeslir smiled.
Deengar could’ve screamed at them for their strangeness, but stepped back instead when Taeslir’s glance fell so softly to Liu’s messy hair.
Taeslir slung his arms around them as well and buried his face in their hair under his chin. ’You shouldn’t go against Yppha if he’s requesting you to stay by his side.’
He wanted to ask them to go back down, but Liu’s whine cut him off. They tightened their arms around him. ‘I can’t! Yppha didn’t ask me to stay by his side…he forced me. Even though I recovered, he didn’t keep his promise.’
’I’m sure Yppha didn’t mean it like that,’ Taeslir lowered his voice and brushed his hand through Liu’s hair.
They sobbed tearlessly. ‘I know that…but it didn’t hurt any less.’
’You don’t look like you recovered’ Deengar raised his voice.
’I did! The stairs just kind of got to me…,’ Liu admitted with a sad smile.
Instead of commenting on the low amount of stairs up to his room, Deengar left to where he originally wanted to go. He said, they should do whatever they wanted, Yppha sure knew where to find them if he found Liu missing.
Once he had disappeared, Taeslir asked how they’d escaped.
Liu grinned. ’He’s sleeping and I snuck out.’
They leaned back a little and eyed Taeslir for a second. He looked fine, they said after some time, and finally slumped down to mattress.
Taeslir lied down as well. His explanation of his recovery was brief, but Liu nodded happily. When their glance darkened, he added Lou’s well-being to his words.
’Why would he offer himself to you like that?’ Liu mumbled quietly, snuggling up to Taeslir’s side as his words lulled them into sleepiness.
Taeslir explained his idea of how Lou felt responsible for his condition. When he turned over and slung his arm around them, Liu’s glance altered. They appeared wideawake, and Taeslir’s soothing pulls couldn’t hold them down. They sat up and stemmed their hands against the mattress.
‘Why does he feel responsible? Did he do something?’ they asked hollowly, and Taeslir wrapped his hand around their arm before he provided an explanation. Their gaze softened, but they still didn’t see how Lou performing the healing could make him feel responsible.
Taeslir sighed. ’Deengar said I was dead for a second.’
Lightning would’ve struck Liu gentler than Taeslir’s remark, and they jolted against his grip. Taeslir asked them to look at him when they panicked, anger brooding as they appeared dangerously like they were scanning the area for Lou. He convinced them Lou hadn’t done it willingly and no one else had known what to do, but Liu snapped at him that they weren’t stupid.
‘I know that, but he can’t just kill you! Even if it’s temporary.’
They pushed away from the mattress, and Taeslir ached into a bent of his spine, clinging to Liu’s torso and pulling them back down.
’I think Deengar mentioned, Lou had that knowledge from you,’ he whispered and ran his hand through their hair behind their ear. ‘So, you taught him?’
‘Well, no, but I told him –‘
‘So, the credit is yours. You indirectly saved me.’
‘Yeah, I mean – I don’t know.’
Taeslir cupped their cheek, tracing his thumb over their lips. Lou didn’t do anything, he repeated and searched for Liu’s eyes. They nodded silently. With a smile Taeslir pulled them toward his chest, and they calmed down. Another, quieter approval slid from their lips as they drifted off.
Deengar huffed from across the room, and Taeslir looked up at him. ’It’s scary every time, knowing you can just do that.’
Taeslir shifted and looked at him. ‘What do you mean?’
‘Manipulating them into calming down.’
Taeslir turned up his nose. ‘That’s not what I was doing. It’s trust and wanting to keep them safe.’
He earned himself a shrug as Deengar sat down on the free side of the bed, his glance swaying to Liu.
He eventually asked what they’d do now.
’Would you mind if they stayed? Like you said, Yppha will know where to find them.’
’If I mind?’ Deengar snapped at him, but immediately lowered his voice again. ‘I’ll be the one Yppha will scold for not having returned them, but of course, you two just do your lovely thing.’
He slipped under the covers, too tired to keep up his act, and moved his arm over Liu’s head to brush his fingers through Taeslir’s hair.
Taeslir smiled. ‘Someone like you shouldn’t have a problem with that.’
Deengar’s expression changed, and his hand fell to Taeslir’s neck. Needing to bite down on his lip to silence his laugh, Taeslir watched him.
’He scares me when he’s mad,’ Deengar murmured quietly and turned over to face the ceiling.
Taeslir’s teeth lost their purpose, and a snort rang through the room.
Deengar’s glare flickered at him, and Taeslir quickly agreed.
He warned him; should he even think about telling him, he’d sense it, and he would regret his decision – not in the pleasurable way. His eyes flickered brightly until they caught a glimpse of Taeslir’s warm smile. He let the warning stare drop and turned back to the ceiling.
’You should trust me some more as well, you know,’ Taeslir said and closed his eyes. He noticed how Deengar’s weight shifted and soon found a hand on his upper arm.
‘If that means, you’ll treat me like Liu just now, I don’t want it’, Deengar pressed a tired laugh through his answer, but his smile thinned in a hint of seriousness.
Taeslir removed his hand from Liu’s back and pulled on Deengar’s waist – a silent response as they didn’t raise their voices again.