Chapter Text
Unfamiliar sounds drew Neil to consciousness. When he opened his eyes, he was in a foreign room. He was about to freak out when he recognised the blonde hair tickling the scars on his cheek, and the rhythm of breathing of the boy in his arms.
Andrew really was the little spoon.
Mentally, he went through the mantra he recited first thing every morning to keep himself grounded. To keep himself from being the rabbit.
My name is Neil Josten.
I am a pro-exy striker
Nathan is in the ground.
The Moriyama’s ordered me to live.
I love one man,
His name is Andrew Minyard.
Andrew Minyard was there now, grounding Neil even in his sleep. His disarrayed hair tickling Neil’s nose, armbands on the bedside table, sweat pants riding low on his hips …
Neil heard shuffling again and sat up, reaching carefully over Andrew – careful not to startle him awake – for one of the knives in his armbands. Neil hoped it was just a squatter who’d got used to their house being empty over the last few months while the transfer finalised, and not a murderer. He really didn’t want to have to kill someone on their first morning in their new home, Nicky would be so upset – they weren’t technically supposed to have moved in as yet.
After cat-shopping they realised they couldn’t take the cats to Columbia, where Aaron was.
“It’s just the cats,” Andrew said sleepily.
The cats. Neil relaxed, his arm lowered, his fingers tangling in Andrew’s hair. Andrew turned and draped himself directly on top of Neil’s body, settling back into a peaceful doze. He still had bad days, especially at night. There were days when they couldn’t touch and days when one of them – usually Neil since they were at Columbia and sharing Andrew’s room – needed to sleep on the couch. But the good days were becoming more frequent, and a happy Andrew was surprisingly clingy. In his sleep, Andrew clung to Neil like a koala.
The creak of hinges – cabinet doors opening, echoed from downstairs.
“That’s not the cats,” Andrew said as Neil muttered, “someone’s in the house.”
They were both on their feet and quietly out the bedroom door immediately – Andrew’s armbands were on, and he handed Neil a throwing knife just in case.
At the end of the passage, Andrew – who had asserted himself ahead of Neil – peeped into the kitchen where the shuffling led them. His posture relaxed, and Neil looked over his shoulder to find a shirtless, uninvited Kevin Day rummaging through their kitchen.
“Did you give Kevin a key?” Neil whispered, bewildered.
“I didn’t even give him our address,” Andrew replied, bored.
“Fucking finally,” Kevin exclaimed, watching Neil, “I was going to come wake you up for a morning run, but I decided not to risk waking Andrew.”
“Smart man,” Andrew said.
“Also, we didn’t invite you,” Neil said at the same time.
Neil had plans for this morning, like getting brownie points from Andrew by teaching King and Sir how to go on walks around the neighborhood. And sorting out the moving truck, and actually moving in. And not Kevin Day.
During pillow talk the previous night, after Neil and Andrew had come to their new house and set up the kittens in the living room with toys, food, automatic water dispensers, a litter box they didn’t seem to care about, a scratching post and climbing tree, and putting their collars on, it had been decided that King and Sir were not Andrew and Neil’s pets, but their adopted children. Neil decided he was fine with it.
“ – and we should really get some grocery shopping done on our way back,” Kevin remarked nonchalantly from where his head was peeking in the highest cabinets Neil was sure he and Andrew would never use. “Do you even own a frying pan? I can find nothing but Walmart packets of Candy – honestly Andrew, you’re a professional athlete,”
“ – they’re Neil’s,” Andrew provided as Kevin continued talking over him.
“Absolutely nothing I can make for breakfast at all,”
“did you try your house?” Neil suggested but was also ignored.
“Let’s go for a run and then we can do the shopping on the way back,” Kevin decided, nodding to himself. “I’ll get dressed.” With a clap of his hands and an infuriating can-do attitude, Kevin made his way to the guest room no one had shown him.
“Did we adopt Day as well?” Andrew wondered aloud, “It’s your turn to babysit. Been doing it too long. I’m getting old. I’m going back to bed.” He turned to the door.
Neil held out his arms as a barricade so his boyfriend ended up collected in them. “Or, you could stay down here and play with the kittens while I go finish up the grocery shopping. Maybe actually get the essentials without the cookie monster in my trolley,” he brushed the golden strands away from Andrew’s face, looking down at him with fondness. And morning wood. “See if you can set up the cats’ climbing tree.”
Kevin returned to the kitchen, now with a shirt. He held a large running shoe in his hand. A small, orange kitten snoozed inside it.
“Should I leave it outside?” Kevin asked, watching Sir consideringly.
“That’s our cat,” Neil snapped before Andrew could stab Kevin. He took the kitten from Kevin, who put his shoe on, hopping on one already shoe-clad foot.
“When did you guys get a cat?”
“When did you get a key?” Andrew countered.
“Last night, here – just give them both to me,” Neil scolded Kevin, handing Sir to Andrew who was now sitting cross-legged on the carpet in the living room. He received the snoozing kitten and placed him on his lap, stroking his striped head gently.
“Both, there’s two of them?”
Andrew looked up at Kevin slowly, “Kevin Day, where is King?”
“What?” Kevin asked in incredulity.
“We put them in the guest room last night,” Neil explained, “Did you let them out?”
“Did you name your cat after Riko?” Kevin whisper-yelled. “Andrew, you little shit,”
“Ew,” Andrew commented, unhelpfully.
“No.” Neil pinched the bridge of his nose. He could only deal with Kevin in small doses when they were talking about anything non-exy-related. He grabbed Kevin’s arm and pulled him to the guest room, “Just, make use of your tallness and find King Fluffinkins,”
“Andrew agreed to have a cat named King Fluffikins?” Kevin commented, distracted as they entered the guest room, “is this one bright orange as well? Did you want them to look like your biological kids?”
“This one’s grey.” Neil said, “And Andrew named this one Sir Fat Cat McCatterson.”
Kevin was on his knees, looking under the bed. At this, he turned to face Neil, ass still in the air. “You’re fucking with me.”
“You can just call him Sir.” Neil replied as Andrew entered the guest room behind them, holding the grey cat in his hands.
“I regret nothing. And he was in the kitchen, probably followed you out.”
“Okay,” Neil said, relieved. He scratched the cat’s head and then kissed Andrew on the forehead. “I’m going to change, and then we can go,” Neil said to Kevin. Andrew followed Neil up the stairs back to the bedroom, “ – where’s the shopping list, love?”
It was awfully British of him, but he supposed he was half-British. Everyone knew that Neil called Andrew “Drew”, but the pet names were just for them. It felt thrillingly intimate calling Andrew ‘Love, Baby, Sweetheart,’. The difference between “Drew” when he’s casually affectionate, and “My Drew” When he’s lost in the sensation of stolen kisses, or being swallowed whole.
“In my memory,” Andrew smirked, his eyes mischievous as Neil slipped into a grey t-shirt and running shorts, “buy Day a girlfriend while you’re at it.”
“Text it to me.” Neil replied regarding the shopping list, “Also, maybe we should just get him a boyfriend. I know he insists he’s hetero, but I’ve seen how he stares when he spots you at the gym. It’s all very uncomfortable.” Neil laced up his sneakers.
“You think that’s uncomfortable?” Andrew handed Neil the smartwatch he bought for him, so he can ‘answer Andrew’s fucking calls while running’. “I think Day might have a medical kink because have you seen him go nonverbal when Aaron shows up in scrubs? That’s uncomfortable for all involved, including my extremely straight and taken twin brother,”
“Sure, but you’re the hot twin.”
“We’re literally identical.” They made their way back to the kitchen where Kevin was gathering two bottles of water and a few granola bars for him and Neil.
With the thought of Kevin checking out Andrew at the gym, Neil felt a bit petty, “I’m trying to convince Andrew that he’s the hot twin,”
Andrew raised an eyebrow at Neil.
“They’re both the hot twin,” Kevin replied casually, “depending on your taste,”
Both Neil and Andrew silently stared at their historically adamantly heterosexual friend.
At their silence, Kevin elaborates, “It’s like, Andrew has the shoulders, but Aaron has the abs – oh, don’t look at me like that Andrew, it’s the ice cream!”
Neil looks traumatised at the unwanted image of Aaron’s hypothetical abs – he doesn’t know why Kevin knows that Aaron has abs, or is affected by them if he’s so straight.
Oblivious, Kevin continues, “Andrew has that buff muscle and strong build, y’know?” Andrew raises an eyebrow at Kevin, “but Aaron has more lean muscle and more cut features, so it depends on your preference, really,”
“I thought your preference was women,” Neil says flatly.
“Andrew has the jawline but Aaron has the cheekbones,” Kevin nods to himself, lost in thought with arms folded over his chest as he leans against the cupboard.
“He’s not spotting you at the gym anymore,” Neil muttered to Andrew.
“So yeah, they’re both the hot twin, for different people.”
There’s a moment of silence.
“Stop checking out my boyfriend,” Neil says haughtily, ushering Kevin out the door.
“What?” Kevin – somehow – sounds genuinely confused. “I’m straight.” He says.
“Yeah, yeah, take your straight ass and start the car, I’ll be there in a minute,” Neil says.
Once Kevin is out the door, Neil and Andrew turn to each other, eyes wide.
“Do you think we should tell him?”
“Tell Day that he’s not as straight as he thinks, or tell my brother that Kevin subconsciously wants to smash?”
“Tell Kevin he might be bi … and probably warn Aaron that Kevin wants to smash.”
Andrew plays with one of the screws that came with the currently disassembled cat climbing tree. “You can’t … tell someone their sexuality. It’s something they need to discover and come to terms with on their own. We can accept him, but he needs to accept himself. Some people may never face it, and that’s their own choice, but it needs to be Kevin’s choice.”
“But you don’t think he’s straight?”
“I never thought he was straight,” Andrew said. “And Aaron … well, he would be traumatized and that would be hilarious … but nah. Kevin’s not going to do anything with his attraction, I don’t think we need to tell him anything. Let him live his heterosexually taken life in ignorant bliss.”