Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

     Rocky woke up the same as he did every morning, his human alarm clock clung to his side. Eunwoo would snuggle with each member until they woke up, occasionally spending extra time with Rocky and Moonbin, Eunwoo couldn't help it that he played favorites sometimes. They all had early schedules today, so staying here, wrapped in Eunwoo's arms wasn't an option for Rocky. 

     "Come on even Jinwoo is ready," Eunwoo laughed as he shook Rocky's arm wildly. The attempt only garnered a groan from the sleepy man. 

     Eunwoo went to get up, but as he did Rocky reached out pulling him close to his chest. "Don't go, I wasn't done with snuggles yet." 

     "Rockkkyyyy we need to get ready" he giggled, "we need to be at the salon in 30 minutes and you still need to eat. Jinwoo already ordered breakfast, so come on." Eunwoo tried pulling on him, but to no avail, Rocky's arms were like vice grips around him. 

     "Just one more minute please?" Rocky begged as he rolled them both over into their sides. 

     "Fine, but just one! I'm counting." He grinned while rolling his eyes in response, kissing Rocky’s forehead. 

     "But you're so warm," Rocky nuzzled into Eunwoo's chest, humming quietly. 

     "But you need to eat," Eunwoo squished the sleepy man’s face between his hands, speaking in a soft melodic tone. 

      "I'll just eat your love for breakfast," Rocky said as he blew him a kiss. 

     Eunwoo jokingly jumped back in disgust, "Ewww stop being so cringy and get up," he laughed 

     "Fine," Rocky huffed, throwing his covers off.

     "Don't forget to grab your big puffer jacket hun, it's gonna be really cold out on the water today," Eunwoo said with a wink as he left the room.

     Rocky felt his heart skip a beat, he truly loved that man.

     As the group took a break from shooting on the boat, they all quickly grabbed their jackets to protect them from the bitterly cold winds. The spray that came from the waves made the chill in the air feel even colder.

     "Eunuuuuuu I'm cold," Moonbin exaggeratingly shook his body and gnashed his teeth together like he was hypothermic. 

     Eunwoo opened his arms wide as Moonbin ran into them. Nu spun them around Bin's feet barely touching the ground while they chuckled and smiled at each other. 

    "Just get married already!" Myungjun yelled from the other side of the boat. 

     Moonbin stuck out his tongue at the man playfully, "Fine, but that means you should just marry Jinwoo." 

     Myungjun blushed as he walked away from Moonbin's teasing. He went over to where Rocky was sitting hunched over, head between his knees. Something seemed off.

     "Ya, what's up?" He asked Rocky, tapping him on the back to get his attention. 

     Rocky was startled, frantically wiping his face. "Ah… nothing just the salt from the water is bothering my eyes." 

     "Oh ok, why don't you go hang out with Binnie and Nu? If y'all huddle up together it could keep the salt out of your eyes." Myungjun said pointing to Eunwoo and Moonbin playing around as Jinwoo took their photos. 

     "It's fine, I'm just gonna sit here. I'm actually starting to warm up a little so I don't want to move. Thanks for thinking ‘bout me," He said in a slightly more chipper tone as he pulled his knees back up to his chest. 

     As Rocky heard Myungjun’s footsteps fade, he felt warm strong arms wrap around his upper torso. 

     “Hyunnnnggggggggg, you look cold,” Sanha said whilst he rocked them side to side. 

     “It’s almost like its 35 degrees out here,” Rocky laughed sarcastically, turning around to face him.

     “Can we sit together till breaks over? I brought snacks!” Sanha used the one thing Rocky could never turn down, food. Sanha handed Rocky a few steamed bun cakes and sat down beside him, using Rocky’s shoulder as support.

     "Thanks, Sanha. You’re the best.” Rocky said, the words slightly muffled by a mouthful of the pastry.

     The pair ate in silence while the rest of the members were still playing around, Jinwoo encouraging them to do more and more stupid things for their personal cameras.

     Rocky’s attention was pulled away from the food as Moonbin laughed obnoxiously loud. They locked eyes for a moment, Rocky was the first to break eye contact by smothering  Sanha in a hug all in an attempt to hide his face. Moonbin’s laughter died down the instant he saw Rocky’s head buried in Sanha’s chest.

     Sanha was oblivious to what was happening but still hugged Rocky back. “I love you too I guess. You’re acting weird today hyung, you good?”

     “Yea,” Rocky let go of the boy awkwardly as he scratched his head, “I just wanted to say thank you again for the food, it was really thoughtful.”

     Just then Sanha noticed Rocky’s red eyes and gasped, “You’ve been crying?!?! I’m getting Jinjin!” He tried to get up but Rocky’s quick reflexes stopped him. 

     “Its just the saltwater spray I have sensitive eyes,” Rocky stated in an expressionless tone. 

     “I’m sure one of the stylists has eyedrops, I could go get some for you.”

     “No, it’s fine, stop being so sweet you’re scaring me.” He laughed with a slight hitch in his voice. 

     “I’m always sweet what are you talking about.” Sanha teased in his iconic evil maknae voice.

     "Wait-" Rocky looked down at the half-eaten steamed bun cake in his hand

     “YOON SANHA WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY FOOD!?!?!?!” Sanha tried to run away but, Rocky immediately tackled him before he was even on his feet. 

     Sanha squealed because Rocky had twisted his ears hard like he was trying to get spy secrets out of the poor kid. 

     Jinwoo yelled causing the whole team to go silent, “YA, be careful we don’t need any more accidents. We are doing this comeback as a whole if I have to bubble wrap and baby all of you.” 

     Sanha and Rocky were frozen in place for a moment before they regained their composure after being scolded. 

     “What did you do you little shit,” Rocky whispered giving Sanha an almost angry look.

     Through stifled laughter, Sanha pointed at Rocky’s shoulder. There was a sock dangling partially tucked into his collar, he was able to place it there when he sat down and it had gone completely unnoticed by Rocky. 

    “Sanha,” He sighed, “You are so lucky we are on this boat or your ass would grass right now.” Rocky laughed as he tossed the sock at Sanha’s face. He blew a raspberry at Rocky before he went to hide behind Jinwoo.

    “Break is almost over, go see the stylist and see if yall need touch-ups!” A staff member announced as the boys tried to scarf down the last of their break time snacks. They all went back to work as if everything was normal, but deep down Rocky begged to just run away.

     Dinner was unusually quiet for the group, most of them chalked it up to just being tired. Moonbin gestured something to Eunwoo as the pair walked to the living room. They sat down without an inch of space between them. Moonbin whispered something to Eunwoo, whatever was said caused Eunwoo to pull Moonbin into a hug, practically pulling the man on top of him.

     Rocky saw the scene unfold over the short partition wall separating the two rooms, he stormed out of the kitchen, his heart couldn’t take the pain any longer. After locking the door behind him he instinctively grabbed the nearest writing utensil. He hardly looked at the page of his journal as his eyes could no longer hold back the flood of tears, they began to fall steadily as words were written down just as fast as the tears that fell from his face onto the page.

     Dear journal today's date, April 25th 

     It feels like my heart is breaking all over again, Fuck!!! Why am I cursed to fall in love? Every fucking time I fall for someone that I can't have. What did I do to deserve this? First my Binnie and now Eunwoo. Fuck I love him so much… but you and I both know how it went with Moonbin, we gave in to each other and now it's all just a painful memory. I miss him too so much... Seeing him flirt with Eunwoo today on the boat was just too fucking much. I was right there!!! All day, he's just been attached to his side and specifically looking at me. DUDE, he should know we shouldn't flirt with members. We made a fucking pact to bury our feelings for each other for the sake of Astro so why the fuck is he all over Eunwoo. It's like if I don't make my move he's gonna sweep in and betray our promise before I do. If I even attempted anything with Eunwoo I'd betray him so that would make me hypocrite, wouldn't it? Was I not enough for him, am I truly just a friend? Does our trust mean nothing to him!?! He's not dumb, I'm sure he knows I'm head over heels for Nu. It's hard every day to keep those feelings down and now anytime I look at Nunu my heart lights up, I want to give him my everything. I wish I could just go back to this morning when Eunwoo kissed my forehead and stay there forever, close to his warm heart. That's how it all started with Binnie… A kiss. But wait what if Moonbin still loves me too though? He can't I mean he's all over Eunwoo. That’s impossible though, isn't it?  He said many years ago he would never stop loving me. Part of me still is with him but what if he forgot, but what about Nu?  What about our pact? I've just got to buck up and just swallow all these feelings so I don't risk hurting anyone.  I can't let this get to me, Astro means the world to me, but I would almost give up the world to be able to have either of them. Astro and Aroha are my whole world and I am not ready to let that go yet. I don't know what I'm supposed to do anymore… I don't really want to do anything at all, I just want to sleep for the next 12 hours maybe more.

     Rocky threw the journal at a pile of laundry and crawled under his covers, he tried not to think about what the two ‘love birds’ were doing on the couch. Rocky silently sobbed into his pillow until the sobs turned into soft snores. 

     Meanwhile, back in the kitchen and living room, all the members were frozen in shock. When the door slammed behind Rocky, Sanha jumped up, ready to run after him. Jinjin gently grasped Sanha’s hand to stop him. 

     “Give him some space, he needs it right now.”

     “But-”

     “No but’s Sanha, give him space.”

     Myungjun took hold of Sanha’s other hand and spoke up, “When we go to bed tonight we will check on him. He will talk when he’s ready.” 

     “Something might be really wrong though,” Sanha protested.

     “Something is wrong but he obviously wanted some space so we need to respect that,” Jinwoo said as he pulled Sanha and Myungjun into a hug. It was hard for them to see any of them members upset, even worse when it was their always steady Rocky.  

     They sat back down at the table, whilst on the couch, Moonbin was crying into Eunwoo’s shoulder. 

     “Hey let’s go to my room, ok” Eunwoo lifted moonbin off the couch and carried him like a child to his bedroom. 

     Eunwoo sat Moonbin down on the bed and went to get the door. Once the door slid shut, Moonbin spoke up, “I fucked up, I really-” his voice broke as he shriveled back onto the bed sobbing uncontrollably. 

     In no time Eunwoo was by his side, he scooped him up into his lap, swaying them back and forth until Moonbin's cries slowed down. 

     "Shhhh, I've got you." Eunwoo held him tighter, hoping it was comforting Bin. 

     "I really fucked up though, you don't understand." 

     "Well do you want to talk about it?" 

     "You're gonna think I'm stupid." 

     Eunwoo broke away from the hug to look at Moonbin face-to-face, "Binnie, I could never think that. You may do stupid shit but that doesn't make you stupid." 

     Moonbin pushed himself away from Eunwoo, "Trust me I'm stupid," 

     "Ok well then tell me," Eunwoo reached forward, tucking Binnie's stray hairs back so he could see his face better.

     Moonbin took in a few deep breaths and sighed, "I tried to make Rocky jealous because he's been spending so much time with you and Sanha. I miss him and I wanted him to just hang out with me again but I think it just pissed him off." 

     "Why wouldn't you just ask him? This isn't some schoolyard crush he's your best friend, right?" 

     "Well, um," Bin buried his head into his hands and continued, "it's a long story." 

     "I've got all night Binnie." Eunwoo smiled his signature sweet smile to comfort him. 

     "Thanks, Nu, also promise you won't look at me any different ok," 

     "Moonbin I'm losing my patience," He rolled his eyes sarcastically. "I love you and that's not gonna change if you don't know that by now I haven't been loving on you enough then." 

     "Nu just hush ok." Moonbin took a moment to get himself centered before speaking again. 

     "I actually may have a huge crush on him. He knows it sorta... back when we were just trainees um, you also have to promise to not tell him I told you this ok he'd kill me." 

     "My lips are sealed I promise." 

     "Ok, so we actually both had a thing for each other," 

     "We may act stupid but we aren't blind we knew y'all had a thing. When did that stop?" 

     "Wait…" 

     "Yes we knew and y'all still act like lovers so we kinda assumed y'all still had a thing." Eunwoo shrugged. 

     "Ok so now we don't have a thing, but wow we-" Moonbins voice cracked, "Damn we fucked up. I..." his breath got caught in his throat as he tried to put words together, but they only came out as small gasps. Moonbin tried hard to keep the tears from flowing again, but in the end, he couldn't help it. His body shivered, he stopped trying to talk and just sobbed. Eunwoo pulled him close again, stroking Bin's soft gray-blue hair placing gentle kisses on the top of the man's head. Eunwoo was doing his best to hold himself together as well, but as hard as he tried a few tears still fell.

     "Binnieeeee," he sniffled, "You've got to stop crying, you are gonna make yourself sick baby." 

     Moonbin ripped himself away from Eunwoo and buried his head in one of the decorative pillows that adorned the bedspread. 

     "I FUCKING LOVED HIM. I CAN'T- THIS CAN'T-" Moonbin hysterically screamed into the pillow. 

     "Bin.." Eunwoo laid down beside Bin, rubbing his back softly as he continued to weep into the pillow. Every minute Moonbin cried, seemed like an hour, the ticking of the clock on the wall added to the intensity in the air.

     "We gave it all up," Moonbin finally moved onto his side to face Eunwoo, curling his knees closer to his body. "We gave it all up for y'all… for Astro." 

     "Hey now Binnie," Eunwoo wiped the tears from Moonbin's cheeks, "Why did y'all go and do such a thing? We love you two no matter what." 

     "What if something went wrong, what if it split the group, what if-" 

     Eunwoo tenderly placed his index finger over Moonbin's mouth. "That's understandable, but love is tricky. Don't beat yourself up so much." 

     "It's not only that I don't think he loves me anymore anyways…." Moonbin's voice trailed off as the tears returned. 

     "Well you definitely made him jealous for sure," he scoffed, "so there's got to be some feeling there. You are just gonna have to have a talk with him, but only when y'all are both ready to talk." 

     "Ok, will you help me though I'm scared." 

     "Of course I will. I love the both of you so much you know." Eunwoo wrapped his arms around Moonbins torso, effortlessly he lifted him into his lap. Moonbin was curled up like a baby, his head resting on Eunwoo's shoulder. 

     Eunwoo softly caressed Moonbin's hair until his sobs went silent as he drifted away to his dream world. After Eunwoo was sure the man was asleep he gently put him on the bed and tucked him in leaving a tender kiss on his forehead.

     A little while later there was a tiny knock on the door, Jinwoo peered into the dimly lit room and whispered: "Can I come in?" 

     Eunwoo motioned him over to the bed, Jinwoo climbed onto the bed and sat on his heels next to the two men, "What the hell is going on?" He whispered. 

     "It's a long story but I don't think I'm at liberty to talk about it, sorry," Eunwoo shrugged.

     "That's fine, is he ok at least?" Jinwoo looked over at Moonbin, concern painted all over his face. 

     "Yes and no, like I said it's a long story. How's Rocky doing, do you know?" 

     "Sanha crawled in bed with him, they were both asleep when I checked last. Did 'they' break-up?" Jinwoo said, referring to Rocky and Moonbin. 

     "Ugh, you aren't gonna let it go until I tell you are you?" Eunwoo rolled his eyes and sighed. 

     "I need to know if they are ok. They've been friends forever, we pretty much know they've been dating forever, too. Watching them like this, it-" Jinwoo hung his head, he really loved all his members, it was hard for him to see them hurt so much. A few small tears rolled down his cheek onto his white tee-shirt. 

     "They will be ok just give it time, turns out they weren't dating at all. They do love each other though, but that's all I'll say on that. Just take it easy, I know it will be ok." Eunwoo cupped Jinwoo's face in one hand using his thumb to wipe the tears away.

     "They are making all of us cry," Eunwoo chuckled as they both sniffed back tears.

     "Do you mind if I sleep in here tonight with y'all or do you want me to take Moonbin back to our room?" 

     Eunwoo pulled Jinwoo into a warm hug, "Of course, why do you think I bought this giant king-sized bed." 

     "You sure aren't gonna be bothered by us?" Jinwoo asked while crawling over Moonbin to get under the covers. 

     "Yes I'm sure, Tomorrow everyone has a day off anyways." 

     "Thanks, Goodnight." He said as he wiggled his way closer to Moonbin's side. 

     "Goodnight, hyung." Eunwoo turned off the light and followed suit, curling up as close to Moonbin as possible. 

     A small voice spoke up from between them, "I love you guys, goodnight." Moonbin hummed. 

     "We love you too, Binnie," They said in unison hugging Binnie tight. The trio fell asleep shortly after, still tangled up in each other's arms. 

Chapter Text

     It was just a typical Sunday morning, everyone was usually allowed to sleep in. So, for Rocky having someone in his bed on a Sunday morning was definitely out of the ordinary. He hugged the body back, it was for sure not the usual human alarm clock he was used to. 

     “Hey, you’re awake, morning hyung.” Sanha nuzzled himself closer to Rocky, who was still trying to process the fact he was awake.

     “MmmMmmm…” He groaned. “Why aren’t you in your own bed Sanha? Did you have a bad dream again?” Rocky pulled Sanha close to his chest and began to rub small circles on the kids back.

     “No,” Sanha pushed himself away just enough to see Rocky’s face, “I think you were the one having a nightmare. You were crying in your sleep, so I curled up next to you so you weren’t lonely.” 

     “Thanks, Sanha you are the sweetest sometimes.” Rocky went to hug him again but this time he squashed him as hard as he possibly could. 

     Sanha squealed as he tried to get away, the squeezing and squealing soon turned into tickles and laughter. The pair froze as they heard their bedroom door open. 

     “Sorry guys didn’t mean to ruin the fun.” Eunwoo peaked in the room with his usual bright smile painted on his face.

     “Oh, it’s ok sorry. Were we being loud...” Rocky asked as he lowered the pillow he was about to smack Sanha with. 

     “No not at all I just heard you were awake and came to tell you Myungjun ordered some breakfast. Do you mind if I grab some dirty clothes while I’m here, might as well since I’m doing laundry right?” Eunwoo laughed awkwardly, he felt bad for ruining the maknaes’ fun.

     “Yea go ahead just be mindful of the socks I swear they are landmines.” Rocky chortled, eyeing Sanha. 

     “Hey!” Sanha stole the pillow Rocky was holding and used it to smack him, “Don’t act like you don’t do that too!”

     The two boys continued their play fight as Eunwoo carefully gathered the laundry. “Breakfast should be here soon guys, glad you are doing better this morning Rocky.” 

     “Thanks,” they yelled after Eunwoo as he left the room gentle shutting the door behind him and heading for the laundry room. 

     Eunwoo began to empty the laundry into the washer when Rocky’s journal fell out. He retrieved it from the washer before water could damage it and contemplated opening it.

      “If I just take a peak I might be able to help him. I know it’s wrong but he has been so hurt, maybe I can get him and Bin together again and we could all be happy.  Well, they could be happy at least.” Eunwoo sighed as he thought to himself. 

      He started thumbing through the pages without looking, “They are both so in love with each other they can’t see it. If I get them together, that means… no, I can’t be selfish. That would be so wrong… That’s it I’m reading it they will be happy even if I suffer.” 

      Eunwoo tilted his head and stared blankly at one line, “First my Binnie and now Eunwoo....”  

     “He loves me too, and Binnie… There’s no way to-” He drew in a sharp breath of air before continued reading the journal entry. 

     "He is suffering so much I mean me and Binnie love him so much what do we do?” Eunwoo thought to himself as a single tear escaped down his cheek.

     "If I tell Binnie, it might hurt him more… but I can’t not tell him and watch them suffer. But if I do tell him Rocky will know I read his journal and he will know that I know even if I don’t tell Bin about the whole journal.” Eunwoo regretted even opening the journal now as he stood with his back against the wall, nervously tapping his foot against the linoleum floor.

     “I could just confront Rocky and leave Bin out of it for now. Just tell him you found it in the laundry, yea and it was open. Let him know its ok and he should pursue Bin because Binnie loves him so much still… but if I do that then maybe he will think I don’t love him or something, this has to be done he has to know he’s loved but somehow without hurting either of them but how…” Eunwoo's inner monologue raced faster and faster, his heart was beating as fast as the thoughts that were running through his head. 

     He debated with himself a few minutes longer before gaining the courage to pull his phone out and text Rocky, tears clouded his vision as he typed.

Nunu: Hey Rocky would you mind meeting me in the office for a minute? 

Raki: Why?

Nunu: Just need a quiet place to talk for a minute if that’s ok

Raki: Sure be there in a minute!

     Eunwoo tucked the journal under his overshirt as he made his way to the office. There was a spare room in the new dorm, the boys decided to dedicate it to an office slash studio for everyone to use. More often than not it was used for private conversation due to the newly installed soundproofing panels. Eunwoo paced back and forth in silence as Rocky came in and took a seat on the couch at the far side of the room. 

     “Nu, you seem tense, you good?” Rocky inquired with a raised eyebrow. 

     “Not really I don't even know how to start this.” He said as he continued to pace. 

     “Come sit with me,” Rocky patted the seat cushion beside him motioning for Eunwoo to come over. 

     Eunwoo reluctantly sat down. With a deep and heavy sigh, he pulled the journal out from under his shirt and handed it to Rocky. All the color flushed from Rocky’s face, his golden skin now taking on a more sickly paler hue.

     “You didn’t read it, did you?” Rocky’s voice jumped a few octaves as he hesitantly asked the question. 

     “Rocky,” Eunwoo winced, “yes, but please hear me out.” 

     Rocky looked at Eunwoo in horror, “Why,”  Rocky stood up slamming his feet on the floor, he began to head for the door, but Eunwoo was faster. He grabbed Rocky’s shoulders as gently as he could with Rocky trying to barrel him over like a linebacker. 

     “Rocky, stop you have to hear me out,’ Eunwoo pleaded.

     “Why should I? You invaded my privacy I don’t owe you shit right now!” Rocky ripped his shoulders away from Eunwoo’s hands violently. Rocky tried to take a deep breath to calm himself down but the tears began to drip slowly onto his cheeks. He clenched his jaw hard enough to make his dimple shake.

     “Rocky there is something you need to know, I couldn’t not read it if you knew what I knew.” Eunwoo stepped forward attempting to hold rocky again, to comfort him. 

     Rocky pushed Eunwoo back hard enough to make him stumble back a few feet. “What the hell do you know that could make any of this make sense, you have no fucking right.” 

     Eunwoo's head twitched as if he was cracking his neck, his normally soft expression now turned to stone. As soon as he regained his balance he stepped forward, with each step Rocky took a step back as well. Rocky finally ran out of space to step back, now he was backed up against the couch. Eunwoo's nose nearly touching his, Rocky could feel Eunwoo’s hot breath against his face. He lost his temper often but he had never physically confronted any of the members with his anger. Eunwoo balled his fists up by his sides, digging his nails into his palms as a reminder to himself to not retaliate.

     "I'm trying to fucking help you, you insolent brat. Do you know how hard it is on Moonbin too right now because you two can't just fucking say I love you and make the fuck up?" Eunwoo spoke in a low tone, his voice dripping with anger. 

     "What…" Rocky's voice quivered as he fell back onto the couch. Eunwoo crouched down in a squat position so he would remain face to face with Rocky. 

     "Yea he spent the whole night crying in my room, while you were in yours damn near crying about the same shit. Y'all are getting on my nerves with this teenage bullshit." Eunwoo sighed as he pushed himself up and away from the couch. He placed his hands on the bridge of his nose and breathed deeply into his palms to calm down before he did or said something he would regret. 

     “Wait so, you don’t…” Rocky threw his head back in a futile attempt to stop the now constant flow of tears. 

     “Don’t what?”

     “You don’t care about the fact that I love you too!” Rocky slammed his fists into the couch cushions as he screwed his eyes together. Rocky couldn’t believe the conversation that was being had nothing felt real for him at that moment. 

     Eunwoo swiftly snapped out of his anger, his face and hands returned to their usual soft comforting features. “Wait that’s not what I meant. Rocky,” Eunwoo sat down, enveloping Rocky in a hug. He figured that Rocky might misunderstand him, but it still pulled at his heart making it ache.

     “What do you mean then” Rocky gave into the hug sobbing into Eunwoo’s shoulder.

     “Hey look at me,” Eunwoo shifted so he could look into Rocky’s eyes, “I never said that, all I want is for the two of yall to be happy because I love yall.” He brushed Rocky’s cheek with the back of his hand, he wiped away the tears that were still coming down fast, with tears now welling up in his own eyes. 

     “But I, if there is even a choice I cant-” Rocky hiccuped, “I couldn’t choose I love you both. You shouldn’t have read it now we all have to suffer.”

     “I couldn’t choose either! You and Bin are my whole heart. I love the both of you and I’d do anything to make sure yall were happy.” 

     “Well, you just said that I know you love us you tell us all, ALL the time.” 

     “I didn’t want to say this it's going to complicate everything, but-” Eunwoo let out a sharp huff of air, “No I mean I love you. I love Bin too, so we are in the same shitty boat.” 

     Rocky began to hyperventilate, his thoughts ran ahead of him at lightspeed. “No nononononooo this is even worse... “

     “Hey, calm down don’t be so quick maybe there’s a solution we aren’t seeing here.” Eunwoo held Rocky as the man shook and sobbed. 

     “You do know we all thought you two were dating already if that helps. No one cares what we do as long as we are all happy so I’m sure, all of us, we will be ok in the end with whatever happens.” 

     Rocky was frustrated, he threw himself against the back of the couch, “It’s not like we can all fucking date. I can’t choose it’s not fair!”

     “Uhhhh well, babe maybe you are wrong about that. Maybe none of us have to choose,” 

     “What in the absolute fuck do you mean, its either love of my life or first love like there are no other choices to be had, either way, I’d regret it.” Rocky shook his head he didn’t quite understand what Eunwoo meant.

     “You could have both of us I mean if yall are up for that kind of thing?” Eunwoo shrugged, he knew polyamory wasn't for everyone but it was worth a shot to ask.

     “You mean cheating right, cause that sounds an awful lot like cheating.” Rocky’s voice started to quiver again with that thought.

     “Not exactly have you heard of polyamory?” Eunwoo asked while he gently grasped Rocky’s hand, rubbing back and forth with his thumb over the man’s smooth skin.

     “Eunwoo I’ve never meant this more in my life, I am... so confused,” Rocky said as he still sniffed back the tears escaping his eyes.

     “Well if you agree we would also need to ask Binnie, but all three of us could be in a relationship together,” Eunwoo said optimistically as he still held tight onto Rocky’s hand. 

     “That would be hard though, wouldn’t it? We all kinda have jealous tendencies, I don’t want to do anything that could harm the other members. Astro-” Rocky’s voice was caught on the lump in his throat, “Astro means everything to me, this is my whole life.” Rocky gripped onto Eunwoo’s hand for dear life, he felt if he let go it would mean letting go forever. 

     “Well all relationships are messy for sure but we all have a genuine love for each other that goes beyond just being friends. I think if we really took the time and explored it, in the end, we would be happier. But let me just say if you are uncomfortable with the idea, please, don’t do this just to make me or Bin happy. I don’t want you to do anything you aren’t comfortable with. Communication is key and by all of this,” Eunwoo gestured to the air, referencing the mess they had gotten themselves in, “I know we will need to work on that the most.” 

     “What if Moonbin says no, does he even like you like that? What if he rejects one of us like what do we do then? Did he tell you anything? I have so many questions, my brain hurts.” Rocky babbled the question off quickly as he massaged his temple with his free hand. 

     “Well, we won’t know if we don’t ask him. I’ve always felt that he’s got a crush on me but I mean I could be wrong. If he says no to this can you promise me something though?” Eunwoo’s voice deepened, Rocky knew the question was gonna be a hard one. The knot in Rocky’s throat had migrated to his stomach as he nodded his head, preparing himself for the worst.

     Eunwoo let go of Rocky’s hand and began to stroke his soft hair. He moved his hand down to cup Rocky’s face and for what felt like the millionth time in the last thirty minutes Eunwoo wiped the tears away. “I need you to promise that you will still try to be happy with Bin,” Eunwoo smiled with tears overflowing on his own face now. 

     “I know Binnie will not reject you and I’ll be ok. If the two of you are happy that’s all I need.” 

     “Nu,” Rocky whined in protest.

     “No, I’m serious. I will be ok no matter the outcome, cause no matter what happens,” Eunwoo cleared his throat and began to sing, “now whatever way our stories end, I know you have re-written mine by being my frieeeeennnnd” Eunwoo belted out the last word with his whole heart and soul, he knew just how to lighten the mood. 

     Rocky laughed through the tears, playfully smacking Eunwoo, “You’re the biggest idiot.” 

     “I love you too.” They giggled together as they both began to belt out the song, smiling at each other with so much love in their eyes.

     The laughing died down after they finished the last lyric. Rocky spoke up first, “I’ll text Binnie to come here, but for reference next time please don’t read my journal that was really fucked up.”

     “Well, next time talk to us we are here for you and maybe don’t leave it in the laundry pile.” Eunwoo grinned, his demeanor returning to his usual, sassy self. He leaned over to squish Rocky in a tight hug, he resisted for only a moment before giving in.

     “Shut up, can you stop trying to be right for a minute so I can text him,” Rocky fumbled trying to get his phone out of his pocket for a moment before tending the text.

Raki: Hey Bin I'm in the office can you come here

Bin: Sure but why

Raki:  Just want to talk for a minute without everyone I miss you

Bin: You're so cute, omw 

Chapter Text

    Bin entered the room shutting the door behind him carefully.  He paused at the sight of two men on the couch instead of just one. 

     "Am I… uhhh interrupting something?" Moonbin asked as his cheeks flushed to a reddish-pink shade. 

     "No no no, we actually both wanted to talk to you. It's nothing bad at all, promise, come sit." Rocky hastily assured Bin that he wasn't interrupting anything. Eunwoo moved over to make room for Moonbin between him and Rocky on the couch. Moonbin sat down cautiously still unsure of why he was there. Bin's shoulders were hiked up near his ears and all his muscles had gone rigid as he anxiously awaited for someone to speak up. 

     Eunwoo and Rocky's brainwaves synced up, they both moved in wrapping their arms right around Moonbin. He didn't question it, Moonbin returned the hug as his body melted into the couch. If only they could stay like this forever.

     “So we need to ask you something, but please feel free to say no or ask questions no pressure, ok?” Eunwoo smiled his classic soft smile, but his eyes still showed signs of the fight from earlier. 

     Moonbin finally got a good look at Eunwoo’s eyes and swiftly pushed himself out of the group hug to get a look at Rocky’s face.  His face mirrored Eunwoo’s, both of their eyes puffy and red from tears. “What’s going on? You’ve both been crying, you can’t hide that from me. Seriously, someone tell me what’s going on before I get one of the hyungs.” Moonbin jumped up from his seat ready to head for the door.

     Rocky held onto Bin’s hand pulling him back, “hey no need for that we are ok, promise. Just sit down and let us explain ok.”

     "Ok but y'all are ok, right?" Bin looked at the pair with his eyes full of worry. 

     "Yes, we are ok silly, " Eunwoo rolled his eyes. "So, just let both of us talk before you respond, ok?" Moonbin nodded in agreement, giving his undivided attention to Eunwoo. 

     "Rocky, do you want to go first?" 

     "Sure," Rocky took a few deep breaths to calm his nerves before he started, "first off Bin please don't say yes just to make us happy. This is about your happiness, too. Eunwoo told me that you were upset last night and he told me why. We are both really stupid if we are being honest here. There's no reason we can't just be happy but there is a small snag. I love you and Eunwoo." 

     It was getting harder to just listen to them talk, Moonbin had to speak up, "So we-" Moonbin's voice barely came out as proper words, it sounded much more like a squeak.

     Eunwoo interrupted him, "Listen please." 

     Rocky sighed as he continued, "Yesterday we both purposely made each other jealous for very similar reasons. It all boiled over at dinner when I thought I saw you two cuddling and having fun on the couch I couldn't take seeing that. I was jealous and I got to writing and thinking. Well, long story short, Eunwoo found my journal this morning and we had a bit of a fight. We, well... we, uhmm" Rocky paused and nervously played with his hands in his lap, his breathing became more sporadic as he stuttered. His hands now shaking he couldn't get a word out. Moonbin just stared at him in shock, he had never seen Rocky so vulnerable.

     Eunwoo reached over Moonbin and tenderly held Rocky's nervous hands, stroking the soft skin until the shaking stilled. "I'll take over from here love. Moonbin what we are trying to say is at least for me and Rocky we both love each other, romantically and we love you, romantically as well. I know this sounds crazy but if you maybe have feelings for the both of us would you be willing to date," Eunwoo lowered his gaze as he could feel his cheeks and ears bringing to glow a fiery red, "Both of us?" 

     "Can I speak now?" Moonbin asked. 

     "Yes!" They both said a bit too eagerly. 

     "So, like polyamory, right? I have only one question." A small smirk crossed Moonbin's face. 

     "Yes, anything!!! ask us!" Rocky straightened up anxious to hear what Moonbin thought. 

     "How would we kiss?" Moonbin giggled like a schoolgirl at his own question.

     The pair burst into laughter at Bins comment, "You sure that's your only question? Nothing about how or why?" Eunwoo said trying not to snort as he laughed, but failing miserably. 

     "It's a genuine concern kisses are the best!" Moonbin playfully smacked the two men upside the head as they continued to laugh at his comments,  "hey, why would I have any questions I get to be with my first love, and well to be totally honest I've always had a crush on Buttmin over here."

     Moonbin lowered his voice by a few octaves indicating his sincerity, "I truly love both of you and I really would like to give this a try. I really think we could make this work." A few tears escaped and rolled down Moonbin's cheeks. 

     He was very easily emotional when it came to the members so it was no surprise to Eunwoo and Rocky that he was crying. Practically reading each other’s minds again, they each cupped a side Moonbin's face and wiped away the tears. 

     Moonbin whined, "But seriously though how would we kiss?" He began laughing through the tears as his ears began to show the tell-tale signs of embarrassment. 

     "We have all the time in the world to figure that out." Rocky giggled hiding his face shyly between his palms. 

     "Yea I agree, let's just enjoy this and not worry about the logistics just yet." Eunwoo leaned over to kiss Moonbin's cheek. Moonbin took the opportunity and moved faster than Eunwoo could react, capturing Eunwoo's lips against his softly. Eunwoo jolted at the sensation, chuckling nervously, but he didn't flinch away as he smiled bashfully into the kiss. Bin tilted his head to the left as their kiss deepened. Eunwoo parted his lips just enough to taste the coffee on Moonbin’s breath from this morning, the taste was familiar, kind of like home. As quickly as the kiss started, it ended with both boys turning an all too familiar shade of rose.

     “Well if Bin got to kiss you,” Rocky couldn’t help but smile like an idiot as he leaned across the couch towards Eunwoo, “can I?” 

     Eunwoo pursed his lips together trying not to smile, but he couldn’t resist the urge. He scrunched up his shoulders in embarrassment as his very toothy grin made an appearance. “Mmhm,” Eunwoo nodded. 

     Rocky tried his best to sit up straight and act confident, but his quivering hands told another story. Eunwoo wasn’t able to hide it either as his eyes wandered to anywhere that wasn’t Rocky’s face. The room fell silent as they stared at each other for what felt like hours, but was only a mere few seconds as each had hoped for the other to move first.

     Moonbin sighed as the two men in front of him seemed frozen in time, “Uhhhh are yall buffering or just chicken?” He chuckled, Rocky snapped out of his stupor long enough to give Moonbin a swift smack on the thigh before returning his gaze to Eunwoo.

     Rocky let out a deep exhale and finally closed his eyes, moving painfully slow he just barely pressed his lips against Eunwoo's. They smiled at Moonbin’s tiny squeal when their lips finally touched.      

     Eunwoo placed his hand on the nape of Rocky’s neck pulling him fully into the kiss. Eunwoo's move assured Rocky that he wanted this, too, very much. His confidence began to shine through as he began to move his lips. A devilish grin appeared on Rocky's face as he gave Eunwoo's bottom lip a tender bite. Slight groans escaped from Eunwoo's mouth, the small bite triggering something in him that he had never experienced before.  A hot and prickly sensation began to rise in his chest which quickly became too overwhelming for Eunwoo. Every cell in his body wanted so much more instead he flung himself back on the couch and gasped for air, Rocky took his breath away quite literally.

     "Too much," Rocky snickered, making fun of the overwhelmed Eunwoo.

     Moonbin laughed along with Rocky, "If it's that good let me try!" He suggested excitedly as he grabbed Rocky's shoulders pulling the man towards him. Moonbin was stronger than he realized, unintentionally pulling Rocky on top of him. Rocky straddled Moonbin's thighs and placed his hands on Bin's wide shoulders for balance. The confidence from making Eunwoo flustered carried over, Rocky wasted no time planting his lips firmly against Moonbin’s. Rocky felt something wet on his cheek when he tilted his head. He brushed it off but soon felt the wet sensation again.

      “Moonbin isn’t crying, is he? Wait no he is,” Rocky thought to himself as he quickly pulled away.

     “Babe your crying again,” Rocky smiled kissing away the tears from Moonbin’s cheeks as they fell. 

     “Binnie,” Eunwoo pouted while curling up on the couch to get closer to Moonbin. “Don’t cry please we love our Binnie, no being sad now,” Eunwoo said to him making sure to emphasize the word, our. He joined Rocky in peppering kisses all over the crying man’s face.

     “Shut up,” Moonbin protested, “I’m only happy crying y’all are stupid.” Moonbin laughed as he still sniffed back the happy tears. The slight embarrassment he felt was evident on his flushed cheeks. 

     “We love you immensely, I’m glad it’s happy tears this time.” Eunwoo flashed his beautiful eye smile that only came out for his members.

     “Me too Bin, but please stop you’re gonna make me cry.” Rocky chuckled as he threw his own head back to try to stop his tears from falling.  

      As if on cue Eunwoo and Rocky leaned in to kiss Moonbin, the trios lips colliding awkwardly. They tried their best to roll with it but no one had any clue where to move. This awkward kiss caused Bin to erupt into a full-on belly laugh. 

     “Do yall share the same singular brain cell or something?”

     “Fine then no more kisses at all if you want to complain,” Rocky smirked crossing his arms facetiously. 

     Moonbin quickly changed his tune, “no, I’m good no complaining from me nope nope nope!” 

     Just then the trios phones all chimed, signaling a text from the group chat. As soon as Moonbin read the text he moved Rocky aside, his feet hitting the floor running. Rocky was right behind him while Eunwoo was still on the couch trying to get the phone out of his butt pocket. 

     “YA,” Eunwoo yelled stopping them in their tracks, “slow down what’s wrong?” He asked seriously as finally got his phone out.

ASTROVERSE

MJ: FOOOODDDDDDDD IS HERE 

     Eunwoo got up immediately and made his way to the door, “Talk more later?”

     “Yup, food is more important than yall SOOOORRRRYYYYYYY,” Moonbin shrugged as he opened the door and bolted down the hall. 

     Eunwoo and Rocky ran after him, “If it wasn’t for food you’d be dead!” They laughed as if things seemed to return to normal for a moment. Their life ahead of them was very uncertain as there was still a lot that had yet to be discussed, but two things will always remain consistent: 

1. Their love for each other
2. Their love for food