Chapter Text
For three days, everything was perfect.
It was a short amount of time, but Talisa and Robb had managed to spend almost all of their time with Shireen, showing her all the gardens and fields in the world they were in. They rode by horseback around the forests and discovered hundreds of little rooms within the castle. It almost felt as if they were appearing purely to give Shireen entertainment as neither remembered seeing the rooms before but they didn’t give it a second thought.
The three couldn’t be separated. On the third night, Shireen had a nightmare, a dream of her father burning her himself. She didn’t want to sleep after that, so she wandered the eerie halls, her feet somehow bringing her outside the door of Robb and Talisa.
They took her in and only hugged her tightly when they saw her face covered in tears. They both knew she would never be theirs, but to them it felt like a chance to have the life they were robbed of when the Freys took a knife to their unborn child.
The day after that night, they tried to keep her happy and took her horse riding to some faraway field that they knew she loved. They had left so early and so quickly that they had not noticed the new chair that had appeared at the table.
But the others did, and they all experienced a variety of different reactions to seeing Stannis walk in after all of them had taken their seats. Renly looked as if he were about to kill Stannis...again. Ned and Catelyn shared looks of disgust and Robert only looked disappointed.
‘I see your war didn’t work out’ said Robert
‘No’
Pause
‘I think I should let him sort through his strife first’ said Robert, nodding to Renly. Stannis said nothing though, only turning to face his other brother
There was a silence as neither of them wanted to be the first to speak.
‘Did you kill me?’ Renly asked abruptly
‘I did’
‘And do you have anything to say for yourself. Anything at all’ he said, clearly trying to restrain his anger
‘It would seem you have more to say to me’ said Stannis. Renly grabbed a goblet from the table and launched it Stannis, only missing him by an inch as he dodged the flying object.
‘Why did you do it. You took me from everyone I loved and not even honourably. You killed me with what? Sorcery? Blood magic? You denied me the chance to die with dignity and instead had me slaughtered in my own tent. Well look at you now. The man who gave up everything, killed everything, even his own blood to get the fucking crown and here you are. Dead. Like all those you stepped on. I hope it burns you Stannis I really do. To get so far only to fall long down to the bottom to sit here with the people you hurt for all of eternity. I hope you suffer for every day you are here so that maybe, just maybe you might feel a tiny bit of the pain I felt when I saw the shadow of my brother stab me through the heart!’ Renly shouted. But his eyes never left his brother as he screamed his rant down at him.
After all this time, one might have thought Renly would have come to find peace in his death, but it seemed each passing day only made the hate grow stronger.
To be fair to him, his own brother had killed him in a ploy for their other dead brothers job title.
‘I’m sorry’ said Stannis, making Renly stop and look at him with an unreadable expression. ‘What I did, was wrong. And there is no way for me to atone for what I did. You may never be able to tolerate me being in the same room as you again and I don’t blame you. What I did was cowardly. But it might ease your pain to know there a men still fighting for you. Or should I say women’
‘What are you talking about?’ Renly spat
‘We lost the battle at Winterfell but it was not the Bolton men that killed me. It was a woman. Called herself Brienne of Tarth. Said she was a part of your kings guard and sentenced me to death for your murder. When you died you left behind allies and people who loved you so much they would fight for you long after you’d gone. I will never have that. And that’s why I now realise how good a king you might have made. Though I guess we’ll never know now’
Renly was silent. He was still angry and hurt, but there was clearly not much left to be said as he wasn’t ready to just be happy and forgive his brother yet. So he walked away, just to clear his head and calm down.
‘He’ll come around’ said Robert quietly.
‘He might but I certainly don’t expect him to. The things I’ve done are unforgivable’
‘I know’
‘No you don’t I-’
‘You burnt your own daughter at the stake. I daughter no one ever knew you had. A pretty big shock when she came here a few days ago, spewing all kinds of stuff about you being her father and shutting her away for most of her life.’ he said, rather accusatorily.
‘I didn’t want to do that. I never wanted to do that.' he said quickly. 'It was her mother Selyse who locked her in that tower. She never visited her and scorned me whenever I would.’ he paused, realising what his brother had said. ‘Where is she?’
‘With Robb and his wife. You remember him don’t you? The boy?’
‘Of course I remember’
‘Yes well it appears they’ve all taken a liking to each other. His wife had also lost her own child so it seemed only fitting’
‘Good. I’m glad she has someone who can truly care for her’ Stannis said, his voice filled with self-pity.
‘Oh no, you don’t just get to hand her off to some other parents and not even try to redeem yourself' Robert began to raise his voice at his brother.
Before they could continue however, Shireen, Robb and Talisa entered the hall, stopping upon seeing Stannis
‘Shireen’ whispered Stannis, having no clue how what to say. There was silence as Shireen just stared at her father, hundreds of emotions crossing her face, even more questions on her lips.
‘You didn’t win the battle?’ she asked
‘No, I didn’t’
There was another pause. Shireen was apprehensive, he had allowed her to die after all. But she also desperately wanted to just be held by her father. To hear him say he was sorry and that he loved her.
‘I was a terrible father to you. I should have fought your mother on how we treated you. Should have visited you more at the very least’ Stannis said quietly.
‘You were fighting a war’ even now, she pretended as if his absence didn't bother her, the same as she did when she was alive.
‘And look where that all got me. I made bad choices and I don’t expect you to forgive me. I don’t want you to forgive me. I’ve heard these two have cared for you better than I ever did. I’m not here to stop that because Gods knows you deserve far better than what you got, but I will spend every one of my days here, proving to you that I want to be better. And if you never decide I am good enough, I am okay with that’ he had dropped to one knee during his speech, looking as if he were about to collapse from the sheer emotional exhaustion he was experiencing.
Shireen didn’t say anything for a moment, but then she walked over slowly to her father, and after a second, pulled him into a tight hug.
He didn’t respond at first, but then quickly wrapped his arms around her as well, a sigh of relief leaving his body. He knew the hug did not mean that all was forgiven, but he relished in the moment anyway.
Eventually she pulled away, clearly far more comfortable around the man, but still apprehensive and leaning more towards Robb and Talisa.
‘It’s alright, go on. I have to speak with Ned anyway’ said Stannis.
She gave him a small smile before hurrying back to the young couple who escorted her to somewhere else in the castle. Stannis turned to Ned, who was awaiting whatever news he had to share with him
‘It’s about your boy, Jon’ he clarified. Ned perked up at this and gestured for the man to sit with him at the table. Robert and Catelyn recognised that perhaps they should give the two some space to talk privately, so left the room as well. ‘I expect you want to hear about how he’s doing back with the living’
‘Yes, I hear you were with him not long ago’ replied Ned
‘I was. Lord commander of the nights watch. Quite a feat for a bastard. He’s a good lad you know, and an even better leader’
‘He’s certainly strong. He brings honour to the Stark name, even if it’s not the name he bears’
‘I tried to make that happen you know. He’s got the wildlings fighting for him and ended decades of war just like that. At least he’s trying to. Probably on his way to get more of them as we speak. I said if he got those wildlings to fight with me, I’d make him Lord of Winterfell. Make him a Stark’
‘Well it’s good to hear someone I trust will reside over my home’ Ned raised his drink to his lips, almost pleased that Jon would finally have the thing he knew he had wanted for so long
‘He declined’ at this, Ned choked on his drink. He spluttered from the shock and eventually caught his breath enough to respond.
‘What? Why?’
‘He said if he was the lord of Winterfell, he couldn’t be the lord commander, and that his place was with his new brothers’ he laughed a little at the shocked expression on Neds face. ‘I know, I could hardly comprehend it either. But the boy took after you with his honour. I just hope he doesn’t suffer the same fate you did’
‘Is there any more information...on anyone at all?’ Ned asked, almost desperately.
‘I’m afraid I’ve kept fairly to myself. It’s all I know. I’m sorry’ Stannis said, and Ned could tell he was truly regretful.
With the others cleared from the hall, Ned simply placed a cup in front of Stannis as they made an unsaid agreement to drink in silence.