Archive of Our Own ^beta

 “Tell me your truth.”

The voice lingers in the air before dissolving into silence. Taehyung's eyes are on the source of the voice, the silver substance. And then they find Jungkook.

Jungkook stares back from besides him, the movement slow and careful.

Eventually Taehyung's gaze is back to the oracle, the metallic surface now smooth. A cool breeze rustles the leaves on the oak trees surrounding them, relocates the smaller ones scattered on the ground. Goosebumps rise on Jungkook's skin as he too moves his attention back to the basin.

“Isn’t that your job?” Taehyung’s voice is measured, removed. It’s his normal way of speaking.

“I guide the misguided.”

Taehyung shifts his weight to his other leg and Jungkook crosses his arms, his eyes trained on the thick liquid as it ripples, but his body attentive to the older boy beside him.

“I don’t know what my truth is.” His voice is still measured, maybe it's a pride thing. Jungkook imagines there’s a minor indentation between his eyebrows.

The oracle is silent.

“I don’t know what my truth is,” He repeats. “Is that a truth?” Eyes now closed, a sigh escapes his mouth. “That I’m confused?”

“A start.”

Jungkook quirks a brow.

Taehyung manifests a small, shiny wisp of his lifestream between his fingers. A nervous habit.

The oracle’s silver begins to shift in color, or opacity. Jungkook is never sure with these substances, with these energies. But it looks magnificent as the light bounces off in varying degrees across its surface.

“You are timid at the face of being loved, bold at the face of loving.”

The proclamation echoes into the forest as the boys stand still.

If Jungkook had to characterize the oracle’s smooth voice, he’d say it was both careful and powerful. Cold with a shadow of warmth. Easy to respect, yet hard to confide in.

He turns to Taehyung and sees his eyes narrowed. He’s upset.

“Okay, thanks.” Jungkook finally speaks, before passing the palm of his hand over the air above the oracle and ending their visit.

Taehyung’s hands are in his pockets, his shoulders slouched. They’re always slouched, but Jungkook knows he’s affected by studying the things on his face. His subtle pout, the muscles around his eyes.

“Wanna head out?” He offers. The oracle now shimmers into a muted grey.

The other nods and they turn to the opposite direction in the forest. Away from the oracle basin and towards their village.

+

“I’d run away but I’d get bored, I know it.”

They’re sitting by a creek after their education session had ended. Taehyung has been trying to transform an old fallen tree trunk into a rubber tire for around thirty minutes.

“I don’t know. I think you’d last a bit.” Jungkook imagines his friend in another landscape, far away. Taehyung would find something to do, things to think about. He’s sure of it.

Taehyung massages the tips of his fingers against the tree bark. With each small wave, a thrum of light absorbs into the tree. Whatever it does is indiscernible from the outside.

“Why do you wanna runaway anyway?”

“Why not?” His voice is strained in concentration. The only thing that can ever change the inflection of his voice is physical exertion.

Jungkook’s gaze travels from his fingers to his arms, to the hair falling over his face. Surprisingly, there has never been an impulse to pity Taehyung, to taint his actions with the image of his tragic early childhood. Maybe it’s because they’ve known each other for so long.

“Because this is your home, Taehyung.”

At that, Taehyung removes his hands from the trunk. Their eyes lock for a while and it’s alright. Jungkook gets a feeling Taehyung is searching for something behind his eyes. He lets him, hoping he finds something that soothes him.

+

“Seulgi loves me. I let her love me, right?”

This time, they’re in the village square. Taehyung accompanying Jungkook on an herb run.

“You do.”

When Seulgi had found Taehyung as a baby, she had taken him back to her village. One of the soothsayers she’d confided in was Jungkook’s mom. They weren't exactly surprised when they discovered an immense darkness (something like neglect, something vulgar and unloving) lingering in his lifestream. But it made the option of returning him to wherever he came from unfavorable.

And so he’d stayed in their village to be raised under the care of Seulgi.

Jungkook eyes the small bottles in front of them. The vendor hadn’t labeled them but he can identify each one. He'd been helping his parents with fortune mixing since he was very little.

He feels Taehyung move beside him.

“Guess which one is anise?” Jungkook goes for a distraction.

Taehyung inches close to the wooden shelves on the wheeled cart, nosing along each bottle. “Anise is for clarity in spiritual vision right?”

A nod. “Clarity and potency.”

His finger points to a yellow powder on the lower shelf. “That one.”

“How did you know?”

“Not sure… its aura I guess.”

Usually, the village kids get trained in a special field before reaching adulthood. Usually, it's based on their family’s field. Jungkook’s is soothsaying and potions. Their friend Hoseok’s is healing. Taehyung's is more vague. Not knowing about his family the educators had started from scratch and had only discovered he’d had an incredible intuition for energy. Much like the village wizards but more wild.

Jungkook thinks it's brilliant.

“Are you working on something new?”

“My mom is, yeah. She got a request from the Park wolves. She's almost done too, but we need anise and--” he grabs another small bottle. “Benzoin.”

Taehyung shivers. “These all have strong auras.”

“Really?” The reply is simply an impulse and Taehyung doesn't respond, eyes screwed in concentration.

As he pays, Taehyung waits for him on the other side of the square clearing, too sensitive to the various substances to stand any closer.

When Jungkook approaches him, he’s stuck under a calculative and appraising gaze.

“I can sense your energy mingling with the auras from the herbs.”

“Oh yeah? Is it cool?”

The corner of his lips curl up at the dumb smirk on Jungkook’s face. “No.”

As they walk down the slope back to the residences, Jungkook glances at Taehyung's profile, finds his expression loose.

A small wave of relief washes over Jungkook.

+

“If I ran away would you come with me?”

Jungkook’s voice is soft against the sound of the water running and lapping against smooth rock. It's chillier today.

“You wouldn't want me to come with you.”

His brow muscles furrow as he squints at his friend.

“Answer again, Tae.”

A sigh.

“I would.” He scratches his nose. “I don’t know if it’d be a good idea. But I'd go.”

“Why wouldn't it be?” He presses him almost subconsciously. Asking the question not for its direct response, but for something nonetheless.

“I'd drive you crazy or something.” It's not what he wanted.

“You already drive me crazy, you loser.”

Taehyung transforms a small rock into a red button. He throws it at Jungkook before turning back to the water.

Not for the first time, Jungkook wonders how much of himself can Taehyung “sense”, how much of this stuff in his head Taehyung already knows.

“I wouldn't run away without you.”

Taehyung doesn't move. “Good because I have Exits soon. And you will next year.”

Jungkook doesn't say anything to that, muted by the red emotion simmering in his gut.

+

“I saw a movie yesterday with Junghyun.” Junghyun is Jungkook's brother, just a few years older and home for the weekend, a brief break from Defense.

“A movie?” The elder squints. “Like in the city?”

“Yep. We made a trip out of it.”

Taehyung turns back to the book in front of him, fingers grazing the page delicately. His eyes remain fixed on a random word.

“The guy in the movie behaved in this way… it gave me an adrenaline rush.”

“Watching him?”

“Imagining myself doing what he does.”

Taehyung is staring at him now, at his own flushed face and wide eyes.

“That's what movies are for, right? Exercising empathy?”

“Something like that, I suppose.”

Taehyung's eyes roam before turning back to the book. They're in the village’s written knowledge reserves. Jungkook isn't sure why they’re here. Looking at him now, he knows Taehyung isn't reading, his eyes unfocused. What is he thinking about?

Can he feel me?

“Taehyung.”

“Hm?”

“What do you think about me?”

He blinks. “What do you mean?”

“Answer fully.”

The phrase is something they came up with when they were younger. It was back when they believed lies were something that could be shoo’ed away with a simple request. They must have been six or seven.

The flickers of lifestream shimmer between Taehyung's  fingertips as he brings his hands to his lap.

“I think,” he starts, voice low and mellow as always. “You are kind.”

“What else?”

“I think you are patient.”

Jungkook's face is expectant. Mouth tense. Taehyung continues, indulging him.

“I think you're brave.”

His gaze is downcast, staring somewhere near Jungkook's elbows.

“Tell me the things you don't like.”

“Why?” No inflection.

“Because I want to know them?”

“To what end?”

Gazes locked like this, Jungkook is sure Taehyung is getting access to something within him. But Jungkook, like every time before, does not flinch away.

“Tell me the things you don't like.” He repeats as Taehyung returns to his book, shoulders rolling.

“Depending on the day, the things I don't like are the things I like.”

“What does that even mean?”

He knows what it means.

“You're a good person, Jungkook. You know that.”

“Say it in a different way, then.”

Taehyung's jaw locks and unlocks. Jungkook might even say it’s trembling.

He's silent, and Jungkook is almost sure he won't speak again.

When they leave the reserves, Taehyung lets out a wavery sigh.

“Do you wanna come over for dinner?”

Jungkook simply smiles to himself. He figures everything unsaid will come out some day anyway. “Sure.”

+

“I can't think of things I don't like about you.”

Taehyung is sitting with his back against a tree as Jungkook rocks himself in a nearby hammock. He'd asked Taehyung to join him, but he’d simply shaken his head.

“You know how that sounds, right?”

It sounds like praise, and it registers a lot like a profession of something big and loud. Taehyung says things like this all the time.

Once, Jungkook had called him out and Taehyung's response had been something like I could have died as a baby . As if the near death experience he can't remember plagues his mortality to this day.

“I guess I do.”

“You can't think of anything because you're lazy.”

“Do you have things you don't like about me?”

Jungkook sighs. “Sure.”

“Good. I don't wanna hear it.” He replies sharply.

A laugh escapes Jungkook's belly as he rocks in the hammock.

“Okay," Taehyung relents. "Tell me one thing.”

“You're stubborn.”

“Another.”

“You downplay yourself.”

The older boy doesn't say anything to that. Jungkook swings.

“Is this about our Occupation talk?”

Occupation refers to the paths after education ends. Kids in the village can strive for Occupations in Defense (e.g., combat, healing, Charms), or in trade vocations. A rare few get trained to join the Elders.

“Partly.”

Jungkook thinks Taehyung can grow to be an Elder.

Taehyung disagrees.

“I have a few months until that becomes relevant.”

A sigh tumbles out of Jungkook and Taehyung chuckles. “I'm kidding.”

“So you’ve been thinking about it?”

“Of course.”

Peering over the hammock, the younger finds Taehyung frowning. His hair falling over his face.

“You have enough power for the Elder path, Tae.”

A hand hovers over the grass besides Taehyung and the green brightens into a soft pink. His eyes are tender as he gazes at a chipmunk making its way towards him. He looks sad.

“They'd be testing my blood and all that. My power could be Dark for all we know. Plus I'd have to get high marks on the Exit exam and my plans are simply to pass.”

“It's not Dark.”

“It's not like the power in this village, though.” He retorts.

“You're not from this village.”

“Trust me, I know.” It's harsh and Jungkook flinches at the tone, mad at himself for letting a statement like this slip.

“That's not what I meant…”

“It's okay. I'm sorry.”

Jungkook leaves the hammock to crouch by Taehyung, watching as his expression betrays the dozens of thoughts running through his head.

“Don't be sorry.”

Taehyung closes his eyes, inhaling through his nose and Jungkook has to fight the urge to reach his hand out. Taehyung doesn't like to be touched.

“You really can't think of things you don't like about me?”

An eye quirks open, and the surprising shift in mood makes Taehyung unguarded. He smiles shyly and the expression is rare.

Jungkook stares back fondly.

+

During their review period, on a stormy afternoon, there's a knock on the front door of the Jeon residence.

“Hi Mrs. Jeon, is Jungkook home?” He hears the faint voice before a minor commotion ensues, his mom slamming the door and scurrying to her readymade potions cabinet.

Looking up from his diagrams, Jungkook sees Taehyung drip into their small foyer, a wet mess.

“Hi.”

From behind him Mrs. Jeon quickly puts together an elixir. “Drink this, child! A Charm would be much faster, but you know how I am with those.”

Taehyung takes the small glass gratefully and downs the drink in one swallow, shivering as the contents warm his insides and dry his skin, his hair. Removing his soaking coat and holding it out in front of him in one hand, he uses the other to hover above it, moving slowly as his energy removes the wetness from the fabric.

“Quite the entrance.”

Taehyung simply stands there, Jungkook's mom returning to where she and her husband were taking inventory in the attached green house.

“Can we go to your room?”

“Sure.”

To the common observer Taehyung would seem fine. Relaxed even, considering the dreary weather. But Jungkook picks up on his tense mouth, his lit fingertips. He acts quickly, as he closes the door, Taehyung sitting on a corner of his bed.

“I'm...nervous.” Taehyung's eyes are narrowed as he thinks. “I keep thinking about things that aren't magic. It's distracting.”

Jungkook settles at the head of the bed, cross-legged.

“What things?”

The hem of Taehyung's shirt bunches in his lap as his fingers fumble around it. His fingertips glow through the fabric and it's almost distracting.

“The oracle.”

Jungkook swallows. “What about it?”

Taehyung continues fiddling with the hem of his shirt. The yellow charmed light from Jungkook's bedside table bouncing off his light brown hair. It dulls out the lines of his features. Makes him look younger than eighteen.

“Let's run away.”

Jungkook gapes. This couldn't be what he came here to say.

“Taehyung.”

“If I begged you to, you would, right?”

“I wouldn't make you beg.”

Taehyung’s eyes scrunch close, his head shaking. Side to side, like he's pushing a thought away. Or unraveling a conviction.

“Do you see me as a brother?”

Jungkook watches Taehyung. Really watches him, his hunched form still somehow proud. Delicate and powerful, Taehyung is always operating around the two. It's what keeps Jungkook from moving too fast.

But looking at him now, he wonders if Taehyung needs something different.

“Yes and no. What about me?”

Taehyung looks up and Jungkook's heart beat can't help but quicken. “I don't see you as a brother.”

They're quiet again and Jungkook let's himself get impatient.

“Taehyung, tell me what you want to tell me.”

But he's petulant. “No.”

“What about the oracle?”

“It was right. I am afraid of that.” Taehyung isn't looking at him again, his voice low and for the first time, it's weighed with emotion.

“It makes sense to be afraid.”

“I don't think I'm good enough. It might be irrational. But it's true.” He shrugs. “I can't shake that off.”

“Good enough for what?”

He blinks. “What are the things you like about me?”

Jungkook let's out a soft laugh, nervous. “That's a long list.”

“Are you being nice right now?”

“Maybe, but I mean it.”

“The good things about me, do they outweigh the bad things?”

“Taehyung.” It comes out emphatic. Jungkook has known, he's always known Taehyung isn't easy on himself. But seeing him like this, vulnerable and seeking, it stirs in him something so powerful and encompassing and he must restrain himself if he wants to keep Taehyung close.

“Of course they do, Tae.”

Taehyung brings his legs onto the bed and shifts closer. It must be subconscious.

“Do you love me?”

“I do.”

Taehyung huffs out a breath, shaky. “Don't lie to me…”

“I'm not.” He pokes Taehyung's side with his index finger. “You've always known that, I bet.”

“I don't know.” Taehyung finally looks at him fully. Gaze scanning his face and Jungkook can't help but flush under his scrutiny. “I love you too.”

It's matter-of-fact.

“It's crazy right?” He adds after the weighty confession. “So easy...” His eyes flit around again as he thinks through it.

“The guy in the movie you saw with Junghyun that time, what type of stuff did he do?”

Jungkook thinks before responding. “He told the girl he was in love with that he was in love with her.”

“And you wanted to tell me?” It's earnest and almost innocent. All of it is intense.

“Yeah.”

“Well you should have. I've been thinking it too you know. Since before the oracle session.”

“Really?” In another scenario the news would have astonished him, set his world off kilter. His insides twisting in chaotic glee. But Taehyung has established a net of tranquility around them, something tender and surreal that grounds him.

Taehyung nods in response, a rare sweet look on his face.

“I'm just a bit of a coward.”

“If you're a coward, then so am I.”

Taehyung watches the bright energy buzzing between the pads of his own fingers. He chuckles apologetically, “I'm afraid to touch you.”

“Have you hurt anyone before?”

When Taehyung nods, he gives him a sympathetic look. “We’ll be careful.”

+

On the day of the Exits, Seulgi makes brown sugar cinnamon cookies, Taehyung's favorite.

Jungkook is holding a container of them in his hand as he sits on one of the rickety community benches. It's afternoon and the sun is bright and warm on his skin.

He’d finished his own exam the day before. It went fine.

“Did Seulgi make those?”

Looking up at Taehyung's voice, he sees the boy coming up to sit next to him, sun brightening the tips of his hair like a halo.

“She did. They're delicious.”

Taehyung grabs one and settles into his perch on the bench. His face is flushed, hair messy. There's a wild look in his eyes that Jungkook is tempted to read into. He's wreaking of power, of thrumming energy.

“So.” Jungkook prompts after a minute or so of comfortable silence.

Looking ahead in front of them, Taehyung chews and nods. “It went well. I'll meet with Elder Shihyuk tomorrow for Checkings.”

Jungkook stares, pride and relief erupting in his chest in bursts, and Taehyung stares back eventually. A small smile on both of their faces.

“Congratulations, Tae.”

The flush on his face, on the side of his neck, deepens.

“Thank you.”

The younger takes his hand in his and Taehyung lets him, curiosity and apprehension keeping his gaze fixed on their hands. When they touch a zap of energy buzzes between their skin but it isn't hostile.

It tingles and Taehyung grimaces shyly. “Sorry.”

Chuckling, “It’s fine, Tae. It only tickles honestly.”

“Really?” He adjusts his fingers. “Doesn't sting or hurt?”

Jungkook shakes his head and Taehyung moves his hand along Jungkook’s arms, fingertips dancing along his skin. Everywhere his fingers touch, a tingle rises under his skin like a tiny infusion of feeling.

“How does that feel?”

“Still tickles.”

Taehyung huffs. “The lifestream is dying to get to you.”

“What do you mean?”

“I’m not sure. But it’s always reaching out.”

Jungkook stares, puzzled, trying to imagine what that means.

“Does it do that to anyone else?”

“Just you.”

Jungkook’s heart stutters at the implication, not that he’s familiar with this stuff. He looks at Taehyung as he picks up another cookie and decides whatever it means, it's only good.

Nothing bad can come from this.

+

“It’s different but it’s not Dark.”

“Well, what else did they say?”

They’re alone in Taehyung’s home. Seulgi out of town to visit the vampire’s annual market early in the evening. She wouldn’t be back till morning.

Taehyung had gone to Checkings earlier that afternoon.

“They couldn’t really identify a region for my people, but one of the Elders suggested a possible link to the Fae community down South.”

Jungkook’s eyes widen, imagining that. Taehyung takes another sip of his tea from beside him.

“So you’re good to start your training then?”

“Yup.”

The younger watches as the boy beside him raises the cup to his lips. Drinking his tea, the ultimate act of composure. He huffs, “This is crazy.”

Taehyung simply raises his eyebrows once, agreeing and Jungkook gets the feeling there’s something else.

“And to think we were gonna run away.” He’s changing the subject.

“We wouldn’t have.”

“We could have.”

Jungkook shifts his position on the couch, facing his childhood friend fully. “What else did they tell you, Tae?”

He doesn’t respond for a while and Jungkook is used to this.

“Well--” He starts, after a few moments. Jungkook’s breathing stills in anticipation.

“--They said it looks like I’m Bonded.”

Jungkook blinks. “Looks like? What does that--”

“My blood, my energy. My lifestream. All of it. They said I’m Bonded.”

The teacup is now on the low table in front of them, Taehyung having used his magic to settle it on the surface.

“With a Bondmate?”

“I don’t know. I haven’t done a Bonding Ritual obviously so it’s all a bit confusing.”

The younger thinks of all things he knows about Bondings. The way people talk about them, how lovely and gratifying and organic it all is. How it’s seen as one of the most special and rewarding things about being Magic folk. Not everyone finds a Bondmate.

“This is outrageous.”

“I don’t want to think about it, to be honest.”

“But we have to.” He counters, a bit weakly. “Do you feel different? Can you picture them? Their aura?”

Taehyung simply ruffles a hand through his own hair and levels him with a look. “I said I love you before, you know.”

“I know, but--” He stops when he sees Taehyung about to say something. But then he doesn’t.

They’re silent again.

“Bonding is eternal.” He says finally.

“I know.”

“I’m not like you so I guess it works differently with me…”

They stare at each other as Jungkook waits. For what he’s not sure.

“But I think it’s you.”

As the admission settles, the air--the moment--morphs into something hot and fragile.

“It couldn’t be anyone else.” Taehyung huffs out a breath. “I’d hate if it was anyone else.”

Breath faltering in his lungs, Jungkook exhales clumsily, overtaken by the implications of everything.

“But obviously it’s not fully formed yet. I think you have to accept.” With a subtle shift in his tone, his certainty slips. “My...my lifestream is going crazy right now.”

Jungkook blinks as he feels a rare tug in his own lifestream, the current usually a lot less reactive than Taehyung’s foreign and powerful one.

Inching forward on the sofa, he tentatively grabs both of Taehyung’s hands in his and gasps as Taehyung’s energy pushes against his the instant they make contact.

“Fuck, I’m sorry.” It comes out strained from Taehyung, but Jungkook is laughing a little. A little hysterical.

“It’s okay. Shit. It’s fine--”

They don’t have a priestess or an oracle but the Ritual unfolds without restraint the moment Jungkook accepts. Granting access to the force of Taehyung's lifestream with a sharp gasp, Jungkook feels it grasping his body, whirling in his head, pumping through his heart. A stunning submersion.

Immediately, he registers a new energy in his own veins. It's an addition, but it's familiar and warm and intoxicating. He's not sure what sounds are coming from the twisting energies and what's coming from the thumping of his blood near his ears.

The light is dazzling and he lets out a shocked breath, wondering if all Rituals go like this, or if Taehyung is just special. 

It lasts about a minute.

When it’s over, they’re left clutching at each other, panting in shallow breaths as they regain composure.

A grand emotion floods over Jungkook, warm and biting like an adrenaline rush. And before he knows it he’s leaning into Taehyung, closing his lips around his like a compulsion.

Even better than the feeling of his lips against his own, is Taehyung parting his in submission. The buzz from their energies mingling, thrilling now after they’ve given into it.

“Jungkook.” Taehyung breathes it out in a wavery tone, dripping with emotion and it’s like a punch to the gut.

“What does it feel like, Tae?” He whispers, nosing along his jawline, hands at his neck. His arm.

“It’s a lot.” He exhales, eyelids fluttering as he tries to settle his breathing. “Can feel you everywhere.”

The boy leans back to watch Taehyung. He's disheveled for once.

Taehyung blinks at Jungkook for a second before moving forward on his knees to wrap his hands around the other’s wrist.

“It doesn't hurt?”

“Tae, it never did.” He smiles.

Taehyung’s hands crawl up his forearms experimentally. Up to his shoulders, his neck. And Jungkook let's him, body still as he watches Taehyung from so close to him. Closer than ever before. He can see his eyebags, the moles on his face.

When his hands reach the side of Jungkook's face, one slides back to card through his hair by the base of his neck. Tentative. Jungkook watching Taehyung's eyes as he studies his own hands, the harmless contact they make with Jungkook’s skin.

Taehyung's lifestream doesn't zap or tingle at him, sated and calm. But he can still feel it, tuned towards it. It feels nice to feel him. Feels new. Hearing Taehyung’s irregular breathing, seeing the dazzled expression on his face, he knows he likes it too.

He feels the hand at his neck move gently forward, a thumb passing over his lips. And then it's gone. And Taehyung is moving back to sit.

Staring at him, Jungkook can only feel affection, dizzying affection.

And it's intense. Intense like Taehyung and his power. Like his story and his curiosity. His heart. It's all dense and thriving and Jungkook is living in it.

“Are you tired?”

Jungkook nods. The ritual had drained them, adding to the delirium.

“Let's sleep.”

With that, Taehyung stands slowly and turns to his bedroom, Jungkook following behind him.

When they settle under the covers, Taehyung revels in the feeling of being touched, of being held. Feeling bold and nowhere near timid.

Jungkook sinks into the realization he can finally feel Taehyung as Taehyung’s always felt him.