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Chapter Text

Bucky has never had his heart broken before. He wasn’t looking for love in alleyways or in barracks when he was younger - then the war had made it practically impossible, despite Steve and Peggy’s odds. When he had fallen from the train and his mind was no longer his own, love in all its forms had been burned out of him.

Bucky thinks he would rather take a bullet or hell, even lose another limb, over this. Wounds heal. This yawning emptiness, his claustrophobic empty bed, his mind’s stupid way of associating the tiniest thing with him - this is something different. 

Tony doesn’t come back the day after their fight on the top of the tower and Bucky knows he’s not going to come back, not until he’s gone. And so Bucky spends his last hour on his knees in the bathroom to clean up before he goes, scrubbing the same tile with blurry eyes until he cracks it.

‘Would you like me to call the Boss so you can say goodbye?’ FRIDAY asks gently.

Bucky inhales deeply, rising up onto his knees. He scrubs his face, grabs his toothbrush and says, ‘No. I think we covered that yesterday. Did he…did he leave any messages?’

‘I’m afraid not, Sergeant Barnes,’ she tells him, and genuinely sounds sorry.

Bucky steps back into his borrowed home, feet curling on the carpet as he drinks it in for the last time. The leaves outside sway, the light stutters over the sapphire couch. A dark ring sits on the edge of the coffee table, the unbearable ghost of Tony’s presence and his refusal to use a coaster. Bucky wipes it away, tossing the used paper towel in the bin afterwards.

‘I would like to remind you that Ross has been waiting downstairs for ten minutes,’ FRIDAY tells him, a lamp flashing to indicate her non-presence. He’d started asking her to do that over time, it made him feel like he was actually talking to somebody and not just a machine.

‘Yeah. Yeah, I’m coming down now,’ he says, grabbing his duffel, rifle case and the box from under his bed. Steve’s shield clatters against the wood, desperate to be used.

‘Do you need me to do anything? Leave the key card somewhere, or whatever,’ Bucky says awkwardly.

‘Not at all, Sergeant Barnes. I wish you all the best,’ she tells him.

Bucky resists the totally bizarre urge to hug the lamp goodbye and instead, he says, ‘Thanks for everything. Tell Tony…well. Never mind.’

He barely even hears what Ross says to him before he’s bundled into an armoured vehicle. The truck and their escort of several sleek vehicles sets off. Bucky’s adrenaline begins pumping, he goes through his escape plan for the fifth time. 

He’s never going to get a better opportunity than this one to escape while they’re in transit. The moment it sounds like they're out of the main city, he's going to make his escape. Less civilian impact.

Ross talks at him for a few minutes as they set off, then eventually lapses into silence. Bucky watches as the lights of New York wink out behind them, giving way to bridges and signposts and gigantic highways. He once dreamed of taking off and running across them, until his body gave out and let him start again. Now, his body is a bowstring pulled taut ready to be loosed back into the abyss. 

Bucky glances over at Ross, only to realise that the man has been watching him. Ross leans back on the metal bench and says, 'I know you're going to try to make a break for it, Barnes.'

Bucky swallows. His hand itches for his gun.

'I’m not an idiot, despite whatever Stark thinks. And I think both Stark and I will probably agree that you’re the idiot in this situation. Don’t throw all your progress away,’ Ross says. 

'Tony has nothing to do with any of this,' Bucky says immediately.

Ross raises an eyebrow. 'I think Tony has everything to do with this.'

This is it, Bucky thinks dizzily. He needs to escape before Ross raises the alarm. But: 'I’m not dragging him into this."

Ross hums. 'Well, I'm glad we both agree on that front.'

The truck pulls to a halt. Bucky rises to his feet, preparing for a fight as the back doors of the van are thrown open.

A one eyed man in a trench coat stands there, his mouth upturned in a smirk. Ross greets him, 'Fury.'

Fury nods in responds and turns to Bucky. He says, 'I heard you were planning something pretty stupid, Barnes.'

Bucky rears to his full height. 'Are you here to stop me?'

Over his shoulder, Bucky sees a lithe red headed woman with a smile like a knife step out of a car. A man dressed in an air force uniform and a permanent scowl joins her. Natalia and Tony's friend, Colonel James Rhodes.

'No. We'd like to help,' Fury tells him.

When Tony and Shuri return to the tower, they wordlessly climb into the lift together. The first thing Shuri does is punch in the button for Bucky's floor and they both listlessly wait for the doors to open.

They finally slide open and it's a punch to the gut. Shuri takes Tony's arm and murmurs, 'Come.'

He does, following her wordlessly. She sits him down on the couch and busies herself making a pot of tea. Tony asks finally, 'FRIDAY, when did he leave?'

'About four hours ago, boss,' she responds.

Tony hears Shuri clatter about the kitchen, every movement more forceful than it needs to be.

He continues, 'Did he leave a message or anything?'

'No. I got the impression that he felt a message would not be welcomed,' FRIDAY says.

Shuri comes over and lays out the teapot and cups before them, waiting for the leaves to steep. She notices Bucky's stray plastic lighter and picks it up.

She says, 'He's going to be so pissed that he left his lighter behind.'

They both stare at the tiny yellow lighter. Then, Shuri begins to snicker - an infectious sound that soon affects Tony. In just a few moments, they're both laughing hysterically over the dumb lighter and can't stop themselves.

'He's going to be out there for hours, going insane because he can't have a smoke,' Tony says, his stomach hurting.

Shuri laughs even harder at that, until she can't anymore. Her fingers tighten around the lighter and soon, her laughter catches on a small choked out gasp. She presses her hands and the lighter over her eyes, her giggles giving way to tears and Tony puts an arm around her.

'I know,' he tells her. 'I know.'

'He was doing so well,' she tells him. 'And he was so looking forward to being a New Avenger. The UN will never let him now.'

Tony's mouth sets into a grim line. He rubs his hand in circles on her back.

'We were going to be such an amazing team,' she says.

Tony nods and says, 'We were. We were going to be better than the old one.'

She inhales sharply and sits up, wiping at the tears on her face. She continues crying as she pours out the tea and wipes her face dry on the sleeve of her sweater, trying to speak rationally as she continues, 'What do we do now then?'

Tony blinks. 'What, you want to stay on with the NA?'

'Of course I do. I didn't join just because of Bucky, you know. I joined because of you,' she tells him.

A weight Tony doesn't realise he had been carrying lifts. He struggles for what to say, so he doesn’t say anything at all.

‘I’m still a princess, though. I won’t have you bossing me around for the hell of all of it,' she says, then adds with a smile, ‘Boss.’

'You'll be operating under SHIELD's jurisdiction for this mission,' Ross informs Bucky. 'To the rest of the world, you'll be taking a break from the New Avengers to undergo a course of intensive rehabilitation in a secure military facility.'

'I don't understand. Are you telling me to go after Steve?' Bucky asks Ross.

Ross puts on a pair of sunglasses. 'I'm not telling you anything, Sergeant Barnes. And if you're caught and say so, myself and the US military will deny any knowledge of any operation. So I'd advise strongly that you stay out of the limelight if you ever want to rejoin the NA.'

Ross points at Rhodey as well. 'And the same goes for you, you hear? I don't want to see your picture on my desk.'

Bucky stares. 'I could come back?'

'Potentially. But you can't tell any of the New Avengers about this and they can't be involved in any way. This does not touch Tony or the princess, do you understand me?' Ross grinds out.

It leaves a bitter taste in the back of Bucky's throat, but having the carrot dangled in front of him is enough of an incentive. He and Tony had once been at a point where there were no secrets between them. Now, he's having to keep so many to protect him.

'I'm going to get back into the truck and as far as the rest of the world knows, you're barfing or whatever it is Tony had you doing. And it better stay that way,' Ross tells him.

Bucky nods and says, 'Understood. And thank you, sir. This means a lot.'

Ross runs a hand over his own jaw and says tiredly, 'Don't screw this up, Barnes. We're all putting our necks out for this one.'

He nods at Fury, salutes in the distance to Rhodes and then slips into the back of the military vehicle.

Ross barks at Fury, 'Make sure he doesn't get into trouble.'

Fury smirks. 'No guarantees, but you'll never hear about it.'

'This man gets it,' Ross says. 'Goodbye, Sergeant Barnes. Don’t blow it.'

Ross slams the doors shut and rolls out with his escort. Bucky turns to watch him leave and raises his metal arm to wave goodbye. Then, he turns to Fury and swallows.

'I'm glad to see you're alive,' Bucky tells him, gearing himself up for an apology.

Fury's single eye narrows. 'Save it, Barnes. You tried to kill me once, you didn't and now we're on the same side. I don't hold it against you and this is the last I want to hear of it. I don't do that weepy Tony Stark shit, so save your apology.'

'Uh. Okay,' Bucky says, too floored by his bluntness to be overcome by guilt.

'Now get your ass in gear, Barnes. We're losing daylight,' Fury tells him, striding towards the car.

Natasha greets him by kissing him on both cheeks, then she takes a couple of his bags and throws them into the overcrowded boot. Rhodey doesn't say anything, but instead just glares at Bucky the whole time - which makes sharing a backseat with him awkward as hell. The supermarket bag tote sits between them on the spare seat, an innocuous yet insurmountable wall.

Bucky begins, 'I think we've met once before. I'm-'

'I know who you are. I'm only here because Tony would lose it if something happened to you,' Rhodey states.

Bucky feels his heart swell at the man's name, then deflate again at his absence. He swallows and fights down the stab of pain, glancing away from Rhodey so he doesn't see the expression on his face.

'Well, thanks for being here,' Bucky tells him anyway.

Rhodey looks at him incredulously, then folds his arms over his chest and grunts out, 'I'm going to sleep. Wake me up when something interesting happens.'

As Rhodes sleeps and Natasha drives, Fury fills Bucky in on the situation. He explains, 'Based on all the intel we have, we think Rogers was snatched last Wednesday in the United States near Boston.'

Bucky inhales. 'That's the same day he came to see me in New York.'

'We know. He was camping out in a warehouse, then there was a struggle that left three Hydra agents dead. Steve put up a good fight,' Natasha adds.

Bucky glances at the shield on the floor before him. If Steve had had it-

'Our intel has led us to believe that Steve has been moved out of the United States to a Hydra base in South America. The bastards took a stealth plane to Rio. Hawkeye and Falcon are already down there scoping out the situation, but we've got shit all as we think he might have been moved to another location,' Fury continues.

Bucky leans forward and asks Natasha in Russian, 'You ever been stationed in South America? '

'I think so, but they burned a lot of locations out of my mind when I defected from the Red Room. I want to say they had an active base in Argentina? ' she says.

Bucky's memories float before them like a spectre, half actualised. He says, 'There was definitely a major Hydra base, we used it a lot during the civil war. And several safe houses and a smaller base for the scientists. They kept the chair there .'

'And can we trust your intel? You've both been out of commission for a while and I'd say your memories are questionable at best,' Fury says. Of course the man knows Russian.

Bucky needs a cigarette. He's almost tempted to roll down the window and puff away but as he pats down his pockets for his lighter, he realises he left it behind with a grimace. He says instead, 'Whatever Tony and Shuri were doing helped me recover lost memories, gain new perspective on them. I'm not 100% certain of the ones I do remember, but I'm pretty confident.'

Fury scowls. 'That's still a big margin for error.'

'They want to trade me for Steve, right? Why don't we just set up an exchange?' Bucky says.

Natasha rounds on him and grounds out, 'No. Barnes, we are not handing you over to Hydra.'

'It would be easier than combing every base in South America,' Bucky points out.

'Even if we hand you over, we can't trust Hydra to hand over Steve. No negotiating with terrorists, isn't that the American way?' Natasha says, turning to Fury.

'We can't risk Hydra having two super soldiers on their roster. I'm sure you and Stark have made a lot of progress in that vomit room of his, but I'm not risking it,' Fury agrees.

Bucky fights down his irritation and says, 'Well then, we're going to go through a lot of intel.'

The car strikes a pothole and jerks Rhodes awake. The man grumbles and folds his arms over his chest, eyeing the rest of the car like criminals, before sighing.

'Have we figured out a plan then?' Rhodey asks.

'If you helped Colonel, it might go quicker,' Natasha responds.

Rhodey looks at her in disgust. He opens his mouth as though to snap something back, then throws his hands up and thinks better of it.

'I don't know why you're taking so long, it's a simple extraction. Tony's already pinpointed his location, so let's haul ass to Chile,' Rhodey grumbles.

Fury actually stops the car. 'Stark's done what now?'

Rhodey's look of disgust expands its range, sucking Fury into it. He says, 'He said he'd been sending the intel to Natasha and Clint.'

Natasha stares stonily ahead as every head in the car turns to face her.

'Are you Rogues so arrogant that you just...ignored FRIDAY and Tony's intel?' Rhodey says, his syllables knife sharp.

Natasha finally has the decency to look embarrassed. She says, 'He's signed the Accords and there's bad blood between us.'

'Natasha, what the fuck?' Fury demands.

Bucky finally starts to understand what Tony had been dealing with the previous Avengers. His heart aches for him.

'Did you really think Tony would sabotage a rescue mission to save Captain America? Steve put a god damn shield through his chest and he's doing more for the man than you are,' Rhodey snaps. 'Tony isn't here because he doesn't want to be. He isn't here because other people are depending on him.'

'We don't know if we can trust his intel,' Natasha repeats.

'Are you crazy? He's literally handed you Steve's location and he forced me to come and help,' Rhodey says. 'You should be ashamed of yourself, Tony's risking everything on this. Get over yourselves.'

Bucky swallows, his mouth dry. He really needs a cigarette. Rhodey catches his eye and Bucky braces himself, waiting for a barrage.

'I'm not counting you in this, Barnes. You only just got here, but I'm pissed at you for other reasons,' Rhodey mutters.

Rhodey's words strike him like a nail with every syllable and he feels Tony's absence like another passenger in the car. Natasha doesn't say anything, she just stares stonily ahead of her.

'When we found out Steve was missing,' Bucky breaks the silence, 'the first thing Tony did was petition for the UN to send us in to save Steve. He was still fighting for it when I left. He hasn't abandoned him.'

She begins, 'You don't understand, Bucky. You don't know him like we do.'

Before Rhodey can flip out, Bucky puts a reassuring hand on his shoulder. He says, 'You didn’t know him at all. But if you won't trust his info, then at least let me look over it so I can cross reference it. You owe Steve that.'

Rhodey shrugs off Bucky's hand and glares out the window. Natasha is dead silent. Then, she reaches down and yanks - of all things - a StarkPad out his bag and holds it out to Bucky

The irony isn't lost on anybody in the car, but they leave it where it hangs between them. Fury tells him, 'Go through the doc. It'll take us half an hour to get to the flight pad.'

'I'm telling you, he's in Chile,' Rhodey grumbles.

Bucky shoots him a meaningful look, as if to say he knows. It mollifies Rhodey slightly and he puts his arms down, sighing.

'Put on the radio, then. I can't stand talking to the rest of you,' Rhodey says.

'Gladly,' Natasha responds with a little too much bite, stabbing a button.

A weepy Ed Sheeran song comes on instantly. Rhodey says, 'Christ, just shoot me instead.'

Tony falls asleep in Bucky's bed that evening, imagining the warmth on the other side of the bed and the hint of tobacco in the bed linen. He wakes the next morning after the sun is already high in the sky and sits up gingerly, holding his palm to his throbbing head as the light spills in through the balcony window.

Shuri is there, pottering about with a jug of water that she uses to water the gigantic cheese plant by the television. She turns and jumps when she realises he's up.

'My goodness, did I wake you? I was trying to be quiet,' she says guiltily. 'I didn't realise you were here and Bucky always watered his plants on Saturdays so...'

Tony shakes his head, smoothing a hand over the sheets. 'No, you're good. I probably had to wake up anyway.'

In all honesty, he's glad he didn't have to wake up alone. After spending the last two weeks falling asleep alongside a supersoldier, the solitary night before had been difficult enough. Tony had gone for so long without sleeping beside somebody but sharing a bed with Bucky had reminded him just how much he had craved companionship. Tony has the AA token to prove just how bad he is at being alone.

'Tea? I've got a pot going,' Shuri asks him.

He'd never admit it, but there have been days he's reached for her rooibos before a cup of coffee. He nods and crawls out of bed, dressed in nothing but a pair of boxers, and curls up on the couch. Shuri pours him a mug and he takes it gratefully.

'I miss him too,' she tells Tony.

Tony simply nods. She kisses him on the top of his head and returns to the watering, tackling the pothos trailing from a hanging pot.

He doesn't really feel like talking and she talks at him instead, filling the silence with her mellow voice. Tony inhales sharply and has to catch himself, blinking rapidly as his eyes glaze over at a moment's notice. She puts a show on the television and Tony watches it aimlessly. Pepper and Happy bring breakfast for them at around 10 and when she sees him, she sighs.

'How long has he been sitting there feeling sorry for himself?' Pepper asks Shuri, setting down a bag full of pancakes.

Shuri crosses the room, kissing her on both cheeks and doing the same to Happy (who flushes). Shuri says, 'About half an hour.'

'I'm allowed to mope if I want to,' Tony grumbles.

Pepper puts a loving hand on his shoulder and tells him, 'No, you can't. The CIA and military want to meet SI and they've asked to talk specifically to us at 11:30.'

Tony scrubs a tired hand over his face. 'We have the UN meeting at 2, do you think it’s going to run over?'

She tells him, 'It might. It's with Everett and Ross, they said it was important.'

Tony's blood runs cold and he glances at Shuri, who looks similarly pale. It must be about Bucky, he thinks. But then they wouldn't have asked Pepper to come as well.

'Did they say what it was about?' He asks her evenly.

She shakes her head and says, 'All they said was that it was some potential CIA and/or military contract. I ran them our whole spiel about no longer developing weaponry, but they've insisted it's got nothing to do with that.'

Tony is intrigued and that's enough to get him up. Foggy arrives then, holding a tray of coffees, and he double takes at the sight of Tony in nothing but his underwear. His eyes bounce around the room, trying to fixate on anywhere but Tony's bare scarred chest.

To put him out of his misery, Tony swipes a coffee and says, 'I'm taking a shower and that means no peeking, Nelson.'

Sputtering, Foggy says, 'Peeking? Tony, I'm straight and happily engaged and I-'

Tony waves off his protests and swans off into the shower. The hot water flushes his skin pink and helps him reset, then there's a soft knock at the door. He pauses then says, 'Nelson, what did I just tell you?'

'I've got clothes for you,' Pepper tells him, her voice muffled. 'I'll leave them for you by the door.'

He finishes finally and changes, putting on a look that is quintessential Pepper: impeccable, professional and poised to kill. He adjusts his collared top and slacks before slipping back out, raking a hand through his wet hair to air dry.

When he emerges from the bathroom, Happy has made a plate up for him covered in pancakes and bacon, Pepper has made him a cup of coffee and Shuri is quietly making the bed in the corner with Foggy. Tony thinks back to just under a year ago when he had been driving himself to death, wasting away in isolation in the tower.

He knows everybody in this room is here because they're worried about him. In the past, Tony would probably have forced them all to leave. But he's a different person now after meeting Bucky. He isn't too proud to not be grateful anymore.

'Everybody,' he says, clearing his throat. 'Uh. This means a lot.'

Shuri loops her arm through his and kisses him on the cheek. 'You are very welcome. Now, come sit down and eat with us.'

Once Tony is ready to face the world, he, Happy and Pepper slip off to meet Everett and Ross. They're taken to Everett's office at the CIA headquarters and ushered in after a ton of security, then find themselves in Everett's boring old office. Tony sits down, glancing around in disdain, and Pepper throws him a warning glance.

'Coffee, anybody?' Everett asks, heading over to a beat up old machine in the corner.

Tony doesn't trust it. He shakes his head - a first for him - and Pepper also politely declines. Ross sweeps into the room moments later, puffing his chest up as he spots him.

'Stark,' he greets him. 'Miss Potts.'

Pepper rises to her feet and kisses him on the cheek, saying, 'It's good to see you again, general. Now, please don’t waste our time.'

It throws Ross off his game and he flushes, choking on his next sentence before simply sitting down in the armchair in the corner. It's beautiful to watch.

'Well, you might be wondering why you're here. We'll just cut to the chase - we know how effective B.A.R.F. has been for Sergeant Barnes and we're interested to know if the technology is for sale,' Everett says, leaning forwards.

Tony's mind leaps forwards, pivots inevitably to its destructive capabilities. In the wrong hands, somebody could be forced to relive their trauma on end, spill their darkest memories against their will, give away top secret information.

He thinks of the quiet moments spent with his parents by a piano and curling over Bucky like a blanket. He hates it.

'B.A.R.F. may have been created by Tony, but it's not a Stark Industries product. It would be up to Tony if he wants to sell the technology,' Pepper informs them, leaving the decision in Tony's hands.

Tony says, 'I'm not militarising B.A.R.F. and that's final.'

Everett mutters to Ross, 'Just tell him, sir.'

'Tell me what?' Tony asks.

Ross throws daggers Everett's way, who hardly even cowers. Ross clears his throat and folds his hands over his chest.

'Do you remember that Sokovian kid from the bombing? The one you talked down?' Ross asks.

Tony nods. 'Sasha Petrov. He's part of our Charles Spencer programme.'

'He was put in the same chair that Sergeant Barnes was. As well as his sister and a number of Sokovian refugees,' Everett continues.

Tony feels ill just hearing it. He doesn't say anything as the fury mounts within him, as Pepper puts a steadying hand on his knee.

'After speaking to a number of former Hydra operatives, we've estimated there are at least a hundred victims that have been brainwashed and subjected to the chair - all of them Inhuman. Apparently they experimented with regular humans, but it didn't end well for any of them,' Ross explains.

Everett says, 'We've had trouble helping those we've freed break out of their programming, even with the help of our best military psychologists. We understand you've made significant progress with Sergeant Barnes in that regard, even if he is currently in the RAFT for more intensive rehabilitation.'

Tony doesn't react. He does however notice Ross shift uncomfortably in the corner.

'We did, yes. So what are you asking? You want to use B.A.R.F. to help these people?' Tony asks.

'Essentially, yes. But we also think that the technology has major potential to help many veterans with PTSD,' Everett tells him.

Tony feels his indignant anger ebb a little. He still doesn't feel comfortable handing over B.A.R.F., but he's softening. He remembers the terror in Sasha's eyes, Bucky's quiet determination to get better and the way Steve had trembled in the chair. And the way that Steve had wandered the tower like a spectre the year after he had been thawed out of the ice.

'I'm not handing over B.A.R.F. to either of you,' Tony says stubbornly.

Ross begins heatedly, 'Stark, you-'

'I don't trust the military or CIA not to weaponise it. But I think I'm willing to move forwards with our Howling Commandos operation, Pep, Nelson,' Tony tells her.

'Really? We still need to finesse the details,' Foggy says in surprise.

Tony nods and Everett leans back in his chair. Pepper begins, 'We were planning to create more B.A.R.F. units and set them up at major public hospitals across the country under the New Avengers banner. But the plan is currently a few years away as we're trying to figure out the logistics.'

'Vetted mental health professionals and Stark Industries approved technicians would oversee the units, so not just anybody would be able to use them. But ideally, any member of the public would be able to apply for treatment,' Tony explains.

Ross' eyebrows leap to his hairline. 'And how long have you been working on this?'

'Pretty much ever since B.A.R.F. was created,' Tony explains. 'How quickly can we move up the timeline, Nelson?'

Foggy frowns and thinks. He says, 'We can push it up maybe a year or so, if we start with a smaller roll out. So a few months.'

'In the meantime, I'm happy to give the most urgent cases access to a beta unit in SI if they come with a registered psychologist,' Tony says, crossing his legs.

Ross frowns. 'You'd do that?'

Tony waves him off and says, 'I’m not a monster, Ross. I’m not going to hog lifesaving technology. We all know what Bucky went through.'

Pepper puts a steadying hand on Tony's knee. He looks down at it, then realises she's done it because his eyes are glazed over, his throat thick with emotion.

'We appreciate it, Mr Stark,' Everett says.

Tony shrugs. 'Just doing my part.’

Once Bucky and Rhodey manage to convince Natasha that it's worth pursuing Tony's lead, things move at a breakneck pace. They board a stealth plane in the middle of nowhere and as the ramp lowers, a man dressed in midnight purple leather greets them with a grin.

Before the ramp has fully locked, he runs down the staircase and barrels into Bucky for a brotherly hug. Bucky catches him with a bemused smile, then winces as Clint punches him in the arm.

'Good to have you back on the right side, Barnes,' Clint tells him. 'Always knew we’d get the band back together eventually.'

The words sit uncomfortably with Bucky. He says, 'I'm just here to help find Steve.'

Clint doesn't seem to be listening and when he looks at Rhodey, the man glowers back. Clint asks Natasha, 'What the hell is he doing here? He's one of Tony's, isn't he?'

'I'm not here because I like you either, Barton,' Rhodey responds.

'Then why the hell are you here?' Clint demands. 'You here to rat us out to your tin man overlord and throw us all in the RAFT again? Nat, that man is not getting on my plane.’

Rhodey's eyes narrow and before Rhodey can say anything, Bucky says, 'I'm not getting on it unless he does.’

‘He’s a snake, Bucky,’ Clint tells him.

Wanda Maximoff appears at the top of the ramp, hellfire burning in her gaze. She eyes up Rhodes suspiciously and Bucky can feel Rhodey tensing beside him, his fingers twitching for his suit.

‘Everybody, I am going to say this once and one time only,’ Bucky calls out. ‘And Sam and Vis, if you’re in there, you get out here too.’

After a couple of moments, Vision phases through the metal and Sam pokes his head out.

‘If you have a problem with Colonel Rhodes, you have a problem with me. I’m vouching for him and I’m vouching for Tony. You understand?’ Bucky drills out.

‘Jesus Christ,’ Clint mutters.

Bucky rounds on him. ‘I’m not fucking around here, Barton.’

A silence thick with tension falls across all of them. Nobody dares say a word.

‘Good. Now, let’s go save Steve,’ Bucky says.

After a beat, he adds, ‘Also, I missed all of you.’

Natasha watches him with an odd look that Bucky truly doesn’t want to decipher and Clint stomps away up the ramp. Vision floats towards them, cape billowing.

‘Colonel Rhodes. It is a relief to see you healthy and well again,’ Vision says, holding his hands out.

‘Don’t talk to me, Jarvis. You’re the worst of them,’ Rhodes tells him pointedly.

Vision pauses, then inclines his head. He retreats back into the ship from whence he came and Bucky sees Wanda lay a reassuring hand against the small of his back, steering him back into the cabin. Sam is the only one to greet Bucky with a warm hug and pulls back with a small smile on his face.

‘Good to see you, Buck,’ he tells him.

Sam and Bucky have talked intermittently through messages relayed by Shuri, as he’s been helping devise and tweak Bucky’s treatment plan with his professional expertise. Out of everyone here, he’s the only one that knows the extent of what Tony has truly done for him.

‘Colonel,’ Sam continues, greeting Rhodes with a little salute.

Rhodes inclines his head, obviously still rattled by what just happened. Sam brings them in and the ramp lifts abruptly as Clint angrily flips switches and Natasha runs her hands over his shoulders patiently, murmuring to him in a language Bucky can’t parse. Spanish, maybe.

‘I have to go and make sure Hawkeye doesn’t crash the plane, but it’s good to see you. You look good man, like well and truly good,’ Sam tells him.

Bucky smiles. ‘I’m getting there. I’ll be better once we find Steve.’

‘Just grab a seat anywhere, guys. It’ll be a few hours, so you might want to rest up,’ Sam says.

Rhodey immediately grabs the seat closest to the door, eyeing the rest of the plane warily. After a beat, Bucky puts his bags down and sits next to him.

‘You didn’t need to stand up for me, you know,’ Rhodey tells him, ‘but I do appreciate it.’

‘You’re welcome,’ Bucky says. ‘I respect you for coming, you must have known you’d be jumping into a difficult situation and you did it anyway.’

‘I did it for Tony. I’m mainly supposed to be here to help you all find Steve, but really I think I’m here to keep you out of trouble. He likes you more than he should,’ Rhodey says.

Bucky can’t resist smiling at that. ‘And I like him as much as I should.’

Rhodey casts a curious look his way, then leans back in his chair. He says, ‘You know, this doesn’t change anything. I’m still mad at you.’

‘Believe me, if it wasn’t for Steve, nothing would be able to drag me away from his tower,’ Bucky tells him more honestly than he should. 

Rhodey assesses him. Then he says, ‘I'll believe you. For now.’

Bucky glances around the room and notices the rest of the Rogues watching him like a wounded animal, as though he’ll suddenly lash out and bite their heads off for one wrong comment.  They leave him a wide berth and after Rhodes falls asleep, Bucky thinks about Tony and his heart aches.

They arrive in Chile and things move with military precision after that. Thanks to Tony's intel, they know everything: the name of the abandoned building they're keeping Steve in, its entrances and exits, the quickest way to the roof. The Rogues move like the same organism after that - completely attuned to one another as they sweep the building.

Bucky and Rhodey stick together, wary of disrupting the Rogues' synchronicity. Natasha orders them to check out another part of the facility as everybody splits off down different corridors and Bucky leads, mowing down grunts as Rhodey covers him with little comets of repulsor energy. All the while, Bucky breathes and breathes through the mounting pressure in his skull, the tinnitus chimes of memory.

They throw open a door to find a group waiting for them and Bucky has to tackle Rhodey to the ground as bullets rain over them. Before the man even has time to recover, Bucky has already thrown himself into the fray.

As he launches in to punch one of the soldiers, she shouts wildly into his face, 'Rust!'

Bucky's arm falters, but he pushes past his instincts and programming to nail him with a ferocious upper cut. It wasn't just a glitch though, as every person he comes across knows his activation string and he can feel every phrase trying to chip away at him. When the room is finally clear, he has to put his hand on a counter for support and squeezes his eyes shut to recollect himself.

He thinks of Steve, strapped to a chair somewhere as electricity thunders through him. Bucky grits his teeth and turns to Rhodes, who is watching him warily.

'Those words they keep shouting at you. They're your triggers, right?' Rhodey asks him.

Bucky doesn't respond. He's too focused on his whirlpooling brain.

'Tony mentioned them,' Rhodey says, his voice level and calming, 'that's why I'm here. He wanted someone to be there for you, in case you backslid.'

Bucky nods, unable to do anything else. He says, ‘I’ll be fine.’

He’s shocked to realise that for once in his life, he actually means it.

Tony begins plotting out a pilot programme of technicians and therapists with Pepper, Foggy and the Rosses help. One afternoon, Tony's phone begins blowing up with alerts from FRIDAY about rumblings in Chile and his heart leaps to his scrambling fingertips. A minute later, Ross and Everett's phones do the exact same thing and Ross mutters, 'We need to have a serious talk about the fact that Stark gets classified intel faster than we do.'

Tony scans the news, sees bullet points about thirty two missing people from twelve different countries suddenly resurfacing in Chile - each with the same weeping wounds burned into the side of their head as Steve had in his video. The names roll on and Tony identifies more than a couple that were on his long list for the New Avengers; then he realises all of them are Inhuman.

Everett eyes both Ross and Tony. 'Thirty two Inhumans suddenly appear in Chile, led to safety by air force Colonel James Rhodes. Either of you wouldn't happen to know anything about this would you?'

An encrypted message from Rhodey arrives. Tony presses his thumb to his phone's home button and the message unscrambles, reading, 'Worse than we thought. 33 kidnapped and brainwashed by Hydra, facility had just under forty guards in it including one of Bucky's. Faced off against Steve, he escaped. Tried to kill Bucky.'

'Is Bucky okay?' Tony writes back immediately, his heart a million miles away.

'Steve did a number on his metal arm. Some scrapes but okay. Very distraught,' Rhodes responds.

'Care to share with the class, Stark?' Ross asks.

'Somebody needs to assess the mental health of Hydra's victims. They'll need help deprogramming,' Tony explains.

Everett nods and says, 'We have an operative on the scene assessing the situation.'

'We do too,' Ross pipes up, not to be outdone.

'Cool, so we all have rats in the Rogues. Funny that, and yet no one's brought them in,' Tony comments idly, then glances at his watch. 'If it turns out that the victims are too far gone with the programming, I can arrange for them to be housed temporarily in the Avengers old training facility and set up B.A.R.F. there to help with the recovery.'

'We can't bring them to the United States,' Ross says, ‘They need to go somewhere less high profile, we're barely keeping the public on the New Avengers side as it is.'

Tony leans back in his chair, resisting the urge to throw something very sharp and very blunt at Ross' head. He says, 'Well, they're all going to need to get help from someone and somewhere.'

Tony's phone begins to ring and Shuri's face flashes up. He raises a hand and picks it up, which puts a massive scowl on Ross' face.

'Shuri, honey. What's happening?' He asks her.

She says, 'The Rogues and everybody they broke out of Hydra's base are claiming asylum in Wakanda. My brother is giving it to them.'

'They're on their way there now then?' Tony asks.

'They were already en route before T'Challa even said yes. Sometimes these Rogues take too many liberties with my soft brother,' she says disapprovingly.

'And,' Tony pauses, 'everyone's been accounted for?'

'If you're asking if Bucky is with them, then no. He and that red haired woman have taken some of the agents with them for interrogating. I've been speaking with that CIA double agent - that Falcon man - and it is not good, Tony. I'm on my way home now. We will be conducting medical assessments, but there's a very real chance some of them will need extensive treatment and to be rehabilitated with B.A.R.F.,' she explains.

Tony tells her, 'What do you need from me? I can send the schematics and help build parts for a new station in Wakanda-'

'No, Tony. I need you here,' she tells him, 'this is bigger than anything I have worked on before and you know the rehabilitation process better than anyone. I know I am asking a lot since the Rogues are here, but-'

Tony is already putting his blazer back on. He tells her, 'Give me a day to sort everything on this end and I can be with you tomorrow.'

'Are you sure? I realise I am asking you to throw yourself into the belly of the monster, but I don't believe I can do this without you,' she tells him.

'You don't have to ask,' Tony tells her.

She pauses, then tells him, 'I haven’t heard from Bucky.'

Tony glances up at Ross and Everett. There are so many things he wants to say, but instead he tells Shuri, 'I'll be with you soon.'

'What the hell is happening, Stark?' Ross demands.

Tony eyes Everett, who is still as stone. 'You want to tell him, or should I?'

Everett swallows and explains, 'Some of the Rogues are claiming asylum in Wakanda. Captain America is still MIA.'

'The victims aren't in a good way, I'm going over to help with the recovery effort. I'll brief Pepper on what we talked about today and she can pick up our negotiations in the meantime,' Tony tells them.

'You can't just pick up and leave, Stark,' Ross says.

'I can, because Iron Man signed the Accords. In this capacity, I'm acting as regular old Tony Stark providing humanitarian aid,' Tony tells him, 'and there's not a damn thing you can do to stop me.'

Ross looks at Everett, who shrugs and says, 'He's not wrong.'

Tony flashes a smile, all teeth. ‘Thank you, Everett. Now get out of my building.’

Despite his best efforts, Tony doesn’t leave the day after. There’s only one B.A.R.F. prototype and it’s currently sitting in his lab, it’s not designed to be packed up and moved around. As the tech god of miniaturisation, he’d been working on making a smaller, more portable version for his, Pepper and somehow now Foggy's grand plan. 

But there are still glitches to iron out before he’s comfortable putting anyone through the ringer. The holograms quiver too much, the machine drains too much power. He wants to get this second version of B.A.R.F. right and he doesn’t want to move the only working version of it halfway across the world just yet. 

He tells himself it’s because he doesn’t want to deal with the hassle of moving his original prototype. In reality, it’s because he still believes Bucky might come back and that he’ll need the tech. He doesn’t entertain the thought that Bucky might, in any universe, need him.

Tony has forced himself out of the lab for the first time in hours, up to Bucky’s floor to iron out some calculations on paper, when F.R.I.D.A.Y. alerts him to a ring at the doorbell with a note of urgency in her voice. Tony waves dismissively for her to pull up a live feed of the doorstep and drops his pen in shock. 

It’s a supersoldier in a baseball cap, shifting awkwardly from side to side. He does his best to hide his face from the camera, but Tony would know the cut of that stubborn jaw anywhere, the clear blue of those eyes. 

Cautiously, Tony asks, ‘Steve?’

Steve’s head cracks up, his gaze colliding with the security camera. His skin is gaunt and dark circles collect under his eyes like bruises. He’s holding himself gingerly, which is more than enough cause for alarm. An injury that Steve doesn’t heal from swiftly is one that would likely kill a normal person.

‘Tony,’ Steve croaks out, his voice dry. As though his vocal cords had been scraped raw from screaming. ‘Can I come in?’

‘Where’s Bucky?’ Tony asks immediately.

Steve hesitates, his expression clouding over with confusion. ‘I don’t know. It’s just me. I need…I need help, Tony.’

I don’t want any part in your redemption arc, Tony had once told Bucky when he was standing on his doorstep, begging for help. 

But Tony has always been a sucker, he was always going to help. Eventually.

‘Come in,’ Tony finally says.

The wait for Steve as he ascends the elevator stretches a lifetime. Instead of being sensible and letting anybody know Steve has arrived practically gift wrapped on his doorstep, Tony just stares at the lift doors. Waiting for them to open.

They finally do and Steve looks worse in person. Tony has seen him 30 hours into an op, caked in dirt and blood, running on no sleep. This, however, is the worst he’s ever looked. Hunched over and manic, cornflower eyes darting around like a trapped animal. He had thought about this moment for ages and what he would say, what he would do. All of that flies right out of his head at the sight of Steve, his old teammate, on the tip of a familiar ledge.

Steve stops and doesn’t step out of the lift. ‘This isn’t your floor.’

‘It was Bruce’s,’ Tony tells him. It was Bucky’s, he could tell him but he doesn’t want to. Telling Steve, letting him into even a fraction of Tony and Bucky’s happiness, feels like trampling it underfoot.

‘Tony, I need help. I need your machine, the memory one,’ Steve says.

Tony’s eyes narrow. ‘Not off to a great start if you’re trying to win me over, Cap.’

There’s something monstrous in Cap’s clouded gaze, unhinged and terrified. He says, ‘It’s how you deprogrammed James, isn’t it? I can’t- they got me, Tony. They got me, and I can’t stop seeing the things they made me do and my brain-’

Tony knows the signs better than anyone, he can see Steve is headed for a full blown panic attack. He approaches him carefully, reaches out to put a hand on his shoulder to calm him. Steve curves away from the touch. This close, Tony can see the blood matted in his golden hair where the electrodes must have been pressed into his skull.

‘Easy, tiger. Just come sit down. We’ll talk it out. I’ll call the Rogues and Bucky and-’

‘No,’ Steve snarls out, retreating further into the lift.

‘Okay. Okay, we won’t call the Rogues just yet. But you need to sit down. You look like you’re about to collapse,’ Tony tells him.

‘Don’t tell anyone I’m here. Please,’ Steve says.

Tony throws his hands up in a sign of surrender and potters over to the kitchen, pulling out Shuri’s store of rooibos tea. Slowly, Steve emerges from the lift and just stands in the middle of the room like a crumbling museum relic.

‘Sit,’ Tony tells him.

‘Do you have your watch on you? The one which turns into the suit?’ Steve asks.

Dread starts to fill Tony. He masks it and instead just shakes his wrist in the super soldier’s direction, the platinum watch catching the light. He says, ‘I never take it off, it’s a real statement piece. For Christ’s sake Rogers, sit down and stop hovering. You’re making me nervous.’

Steve does finally, sitting bolt upright in his armchair. His eyes scan the room, searching for something Tony can’t give him. Instead, Tony passes him a steaming cup of tea and takes the velvet couch opposite.

Tony says, ‘Okay. Start at the beginning. Are you badly injured? I can call my doc-’

‘No,’ Steve insists, his voice like a gunshot. ‘Nobody can know I’m here.’

‘Steve, if you’re hurt then you need medical attention. Once you’re better, we can talk about everything else,’  Tony tells him.

‘I’m not injured. I just need to get into your memory tech,’ Steve says.

‘Even if I would let you march straight on into B.A.R.F., your body wouldn’t be able to handle it right now. It’s exhausting and you’re already running on empty, we’ll start when you’ve showered and rested,’ Tony tells him carefully.

‘I’m good to go now,’ Steve insists.

‘Look, Steve, you’re here. You’re safe. Nobody else knows where you are. Shower and go to sleep, I’m not letting you near B.A.R.F. right now in the state you’re in,’ Tony tells him.

A muscle jumps in Steve’s jaw. ‘But what if something happens? What if I get new orders?’

‘Nothing is going to happen to you, not while I’m here. Whatever happened to you, whatever you did , it wasn’t your fault. You did good breaking out of Hydra’s base, the programming obviously hasn’t taken full hold yet. How did you get out anyways?’ Tony asks.

Confusion breaks across Steve’s spattered features. ‘I…I don’t know. I don’t remember anything. They put me in the chair, and then-’

The images of the chair are burned into Tony’s mind, as though he’d been burned in one himself. He says, ‘Let’s talk about it tomorrow. Just rest, Steve.’

‘Will we use B.A.R.F. tomorrow?’ Steve asks urgently.

Tony pauses, assessing him. He remembers Bucky as he was, prepared to end it all if he was ever forced to act against his own will again. Bucky came to him on a knife edge. Steve is the entire knife.

‘We’ll start tomorrow,’ Tony relents.

Relief breaks across Steve’s face. Tony turns away from him, uncomfortable at the display. He says, ‘Alright, I’m going to leave you alone to get some rest. Sleep in as much as you need, I’ll cancel whatever I have tomorrow and we can focus on the whole deprogramming thing. But Steve, we really do have to tell someone you’re here. They’re all out there looking for you.’

For a moment, Tony thinks his wrist has snapped in two as white hot pain lances through him. He gasps, instinctively tugging his wrist away but Steve holds him firm, his knuckles white as Tony’s bones creak in his grip.

‘Don’t tell anyone I’m here,’ Steve insists. He’s not begging anymore. It’s a threat.

Tony finally frees himself and rubs at the bruised skin. Steve’s fingers have left five purpling marks on his wrist and Tony glances at his watch for a second, resisting the urge to whip out the suit. 

‘Fine,’ Tony tells him. ‘But you need to sleep. You’re cranky as hell, Cap.’

Steve doesn’t even respond, but watches him like a hawk as Tony retreats back into the lift. He zips himself up to his own floor and only when he’s in his own space and the doors have shut behind him, he raises his head to speak to FRIDAY.

‘Fri? Put a lock on the lift to Steve’s floor, nobody goes in or out except me. And keep me updated on him at all times,’ Tony tells her. 

There’s a pause, then she responds, ‘Lock activated and heightened monitoring has been implemented on Steve Rogers.’

‘Do we still have that old Hulk protocol?’ he asks.

‘We do, boss,’ she responds.

‘Activate that too, please. Immediate shut down of Bucky’s floor if Cap starts to act up,’ he says.

‘Would you like me to connect you to Colonel Rhodes to let him know that the Captain has returned?’ she asks.

Tony looks at the marks on his wrist, flexing his fingers. He swallows. ‘No. But tell him to be on standby, don’t let him know anything else.’

‘Is that wise, sir?’ 

He thinks of Steve’s haunted gaze. ‘Probably not.’

Tony doesn’t sleep that night. Instead, he stares at footage of Steve sitting blankly in Bucky’s living room, staring at a dark television screen. Both he and Steve just stay motionless on their separate floors for hours, but the difference is that sleep eventually overcomes Tony. 

Steve doesn’t so much as blink.

The next morning, Steve sleeps, and sleeps, and sleeps. He eventually crashed around 3am, Friday informs Tony.

Tony lets him continue, content to work on mini B.A.R.F. in the meantime, a project that holds even more weight with another unstable supersoldier in the mix. He dodges the string of question marks from Rhodes over text, not trusting himself to spill his guts out. He tries not to think of the scar across his chest or the shield still spattered with his own blood.

Eventually, Steve wakes. Friday alerts Tony. Tony only spirals a little bit.

‘Tell him I’m coming to his floor in twenty minutes,’ Tony says. 

Friday goes silent, then responds, ‘He has said he is ready for you now.’

‘Yeah, but I’m not ready for him,’ Tony mutters to himself.

He takes his time instead, sticking to his decided upon schedule. He loses himself in the miniaturisation process, eventually tossing on a pair of glasses to test baby B.A.R.F. for the fifteenth time. B.A.R.F’s four pillars have been condensed into one little box, only slightly bigger than a rubik's cube. As he presses a button on the centre of it, it expands slightly and throws up a cone of light which flashes in synchronisation to the lights passing over Tony’s glasses. As it shudders, eventually it stabilises and Tony is staring into a familiar white waiting room with all of his memories lined up like vegetables at a supermarket.

‘Jesus, finally,’ Tony says to himself, scrolling through the memories. 

He pauses as he realises there’s a new string of them, all of them beginning with Bucky. Bucky White House. Bucky B.A.R.F. success. Bucky departure. Bucky, Bucky, Bucky.

Tony blinks away the sudden warmth in his eyes, shutting off baby B.A.R.F. before he does something stupid like run through the simulations. He's done torturing himself with the past. He clicks the tiny machine shut and the lights disappear, leaving Tony alone in the gigantic lab. Clearing his throat, he slips the new machine into a drawer strewn with candy wrappers and screwdriver heads for later.

‘Captain Rogers would like me to inform you it has been twenty minutes,’ Friday says, just as Tony closes the drawer.

‘Send him down then,’ Tony says, already tired.

Tony adjusts his watch, packs away some documents on his desk, turns off the holoscreens and hides any sensitive information. His heart is pounding in his chest, the same way it does right before a battle he knows he might not win. Before he can negotiate the anxiety away, the doors slide open and Steve steps through - dressed in a pair of slacks and a blue sweater that Bucky left behind. Shuri gave him that, Tony remembers suddenly, then remembers the way everyone fussed over Bucky’s blue shirt a lifetime ago. 

‘Is that the memory tech?’ Steve asks, staring at the glass room set up in the middle of the lab.

Tony spins in his computer chair, pointing at a chair opposite him with his screwdriver. ‘Sit. We need to talk.’

Steve hesitates, then does - his eyes never leaving B.A.R.F. as he sidles towards him. He sits and god, Tony thinks, he looks worse than he did yesterday. 

‘Will we be starting today?’ Steve asks again.

Tony sighs and says, ‘Look. B.A.R.F. isn’t going to magically fix you after one session. Bucky’s been in and out of it for the past few months and he still has a long way to go.’

‘But he no longer responds to his activation string, right?’ Steve says, brow furrowing.

‘Yes, but it’s still a fight for him every time. Hopefully since you’ve been with Hydra for a shorter amount of time, the process is going to be shorter to get you deprogrammed. But Bucky was working with a therapist alongside the simulations and he had people supporting him. If you really want to get better Cap, we’re going to have to tell someone you’re here,’ Tony tells him.

‘I already said I don’t want anyone to know I’m here,’ Steve repeats, his tone sharp.

Tony passes a hand over his hair, then realises with a grimace he’s still wearing B.A.R.F.’s glasses. He leaves them on for now. ‘Steve. Why the hell did you come to me? You could’ve gone to find Bucky or to Wakanda, or anywhere or anyone else.’

‘It had to be you,’ Steve says, after a struggle.

‘Why?’ Tony asks again.

Steve stares at him. He doesn’t say anything for a while, then finally demands, ‘Is that glass room B.A.R.F.?’

‘Yes,’ Tony tells him.

‘Is it the only one?’ Steve continues.

Tony looks at him in confusion. ‘The only one for now, yes.’

The world falls out from under him then. Steve is a blur and Tony’s wrist, the one with the watch, is shattered in moments. Steve yanks the watch from him, tossing it far across the room and out of Tony’s reach before Tony can even finish gasping in pain. Somehow, he manages to pull out of Steve’s grip but the man is already lunging towards him - his blue eyes empty as hallways. Oh fuck, Tony thinks.

‘Friday, Mark XVIII!’ he calls out and plates of armour rush to his rescue, enclosing him in rapid speed. Steve is faster though, getting a good punch in before the visor has even flipped down. Tony reels as his skull rattles against the metal, staggering backwards as he fires off a repulsor blast directly to Steve’s shouder.

There’s the unmistakable stench of sizzling hair as Steve is thrown halfway across the room against B.A.R.F.’s walls. The lab shudders with the force as Tony shouts for Friday to alert Rhodes, Ross, whoever the hell she can get through to that Steve is here and on the warpath.

‘Steve!’ Tony calls out, as though there’s any chance he can reach him through the programming.

He fails, as Tony always does when it comes to Steve. There is no way in hell Tony survives this. He attempts to fly over to the lift for a quick escape, but Steve grabs him by the ankle and slams him against the wall like a baseball bat before he can even get in the air. Tony activates a new feature which scatters electric shocks throughout the suit and Steve drops him suddenly, a current of fear slicing through his eyes. Tony takes the advantage and kicks him away from him with a boot burning with rocket fuel, cracking Steve’s head to the side. 

‘Friday, ETA on Rhodey?’ Tony calls out, throwing up an arm to keep Steve from smashing his head in. Shuri is in Wakanda, too far to reach the tower in reasonable time. Peter can’t be dragged into this. Bucky is. Bucky is-

‘ETA is twenty minutes, sir,’ Friday responds. Well, Tony thinks, at least he’ll be able to pick up Tony’s corpse.

Tony passes his hand over a keypad built into his left wrist, grimacing at the pain as his broken bones grind against one another. There’s a whirr and two Iron Soldier suits fly to his side like knights, throwing themselves into Steve’s pass as he mows them down. Tony takes the advantage and flings himself towards the lift again, thinking of Bucky’s floor and its lockdown features. If he can just get Steve in there, he can seal them off together - keep Steve from getting out into the general public, even if it means Tony is trapped in there with him.

He makes it and as the doors close, he breathes for the first time since Steve attacked him. It doesn’t last long however before they screech to a halt, stopped by a sheet plate of metal thrown like a shield between them. Tony presses himself against the wall right on time as the metal comes within inches of his neck. If the doors hadn’t already been closing, he would have lost his head.

He’s actually trying to kill me, Tony realises finally. Again.

As Steve wrenches the doors open with his bare hands, Tony decides all bets are off. He grounds himself and fires off a repulsor blast straight from the arc reactor in his chest, slamming into Steve with the force of a meteor. The man doesn’t even cry out, silent as he claws his way back onto his feet.

‘Fine, okay. Let’s dance, asshole,’ Tony says, gritting his teeth.

Steve doesn’t even respond. He just throws himself at Tony again, back into the fray.

Tony would never admit it, but he’s been training for this moment ever since Steve put the shield in his chest in Siberia. Fighting Steve in close quarters is practically suicide, so he does everything he can to put space between them - more Iron Soldiers, more half-finished projects as he fires off as many blasts as he can. Even Dummy shows up with a fire extinguisher, but is tipped over uselessly with a sad chirp. Tony’s chest repulsor is still charging after the last blast, he needs at least two minutes before it’s good to go again so he makes do with tiny blasts that seem to do little to faze Steve. 

Steve gets in under his guard and Tony takes a devastating blow to the chest, where his arc reactor is. It cracks and winds him, but he manages to duck under another punch and grabs Steve by the waist. With all the speed he can muster, he flies them both straight into a wall and Steve takes the brunt of the hit, leaving a sizeable dent in the metal. With a wave of his hand, Tony summons pieces of an older Iron Man suit and a boot snaps across Steve’s foot, resisting him when he tries to move again. He raises his ankle and slams it down on the floor, once, twice, as Tony moves back into a safer position. On the third slam, the boot completely shatters and is rendered useless.

‘90 seconds till repulsor at full capacity,’ Friday informs Tony, her voice ringing in his ears.

Tony blinks, trying to shake off the impending concussion. He remembers he’s still wearing B.A.R.F.’s glasses suddenly, then an idea comes to him. He just needs to buy time before the repulsor recharges. He’ll figure out what to do after that.

He charges through into B.A.R.F. and Steve gamely follows as Tony activates the memory tech, throwing them into a disorientating white waiting room. Steve’s eyes flicker for just the briefest moment, distracted, then Tony is throwing on the first simulation he can find. It’s an early memory of their first ever battle as the Avengers, aliens and spacecrafts decimating New York. Steve flinches away as though they’re real as one alien barrels through him, then flinches again when he comes face to face with himself holding up a star-emblazoned shield.

‘Avengers, assemble,’ fake Steve says, launching them all into the fray. Steve staggers, clutching at his head. Tony flies for the door back into the lab past him, but is shoulder checked by Steve into the wall. 

Between them, younger Steve and Tony soar through the hologram in complete synchronicity - dancing between shield throws, blasts and across one another’s paths. Tony can’t help watching as another version of him helps catch the shield when it veers too far out of range, tossing it back easily as a football for Steve to take out an encroaching enemy. 

He sees Steve through the hologram helplessly staring as well, his hands twitching at his side as his eyes dart across the simulation. He meets Tony’s eyes finally and there’s something there, some flicker of life. 

‘Tony,’ he chokes out. ‘I can’t stop. Run.’

Tony doesn’t look the gift horse in the mouth and does, spiralling towards the open door of B.A.R.F.. If he can just get the door shut, seal Steve in the tech, then he’ll buy himself more time. Bucky was never able to break through its walls, but he doesn’t know how much stronger Steve is or if it’ll even hold him. 

He slams the door shut, pressing himself bodily against it as Steve tries to claw it open. He shouts, ‘Friday! Could really use some backup here!’

‘Backup is less than three minutes away, sir,’ she tells him. Tony frowns, that’s much too close for it to be Rhodey.

Steve slams against the door again, then gives up - instead tearing B.A.R.F. apart with his bare hands. The hologram shudders and begins to wink out, whirring through different simulations in static. Tony and Steve, laughing over a kitchen counter. Maria, smiling with teeth as lovely as pearls. The machinery eventually gives way, cables and sparks whirling like arteries. Steve wields one of B.AR.F.’s parts like a club and begins smashing it against the walls. A crack forms on his seventh hit, cobwebbing across the glass.

Tony’s eyes flicker to the countdown timer in his HUD screen. 25 seconds until his next repulsor is ready to go. Steve is nearly through the wall.

He sees Bucky, his eyes and defeated smile. I need to be somewhere they’ll either fix me or put me down altogether.

He makes a decision and begins to redirect all the power in his suit to his chest, charging it up for one single devastating blast. He gasps as the suit begins to heat up, his HUD flashing red as it warns him of the dangers and he staggers to one knee. His entire body is one long scream of pain and exhaustion, he can barely see through the sweat pouring over his face. This is it, he thinks wildly. This is it.

Steve crashes through the wall in a shower of glass, shattering like snow. 

‘Friday, tell Bucky I’m sorry,’ Tony says, his heart in his throat.

Her voice is cool as water in his ears. ‘Noted, sir.'

Tony fires. The recoil throws him all the way across the room and he cries out as he makes impact, his ribs cracking like biscuits in a tin. He barely sees what happens to Steve, doused in a concentrated blast which scorches the ceiling of the laboratory and the sprinklers go off. Steam fills the room, making it difficult to see anything.

He tries to breathe and his lungs bubble ominously, he must have punctured one. Tony tries to get up, to see what happened to Steve. Nobody could have survived that, not even a supersoldier and there’s panic rising in him for all the wrong reasons. Despite everything, all that has passed between them, he wants Steve to be alive.

He gags in agony as another force crashes into him, pinning him to the ground. It’s Steve, his torso burned and flayed nearly beyond recognition from the blast. His eyes are empty and Tony knows this is the end, as Steve raises the metal plate he used to block the lift doors. He spins it in his hands so the sharp edge is facing downwards, like a guillotine at the ready.

I never told Bucky, Tony thinks suddenly. Bucky, soft in his bed, giving way under his hands like sugar. Sitting on the edge of a yellow slide, the Tulsa sunset behind him.

Steve brings the shield down. 

Bucky had already been on his way back to New York when Steve had turned up on Tony's doorstep, racing through its streets on a stolen motorcycle with a gun and shield strapped to his back. Just hours ago, he had been in an interrogation room with one of Hydra’s agents: Dr. Gunner Nilsson, the one who loved rubber ducks and frying his brain to a crisp. He had been so much older than Bucky remembered, tiny in the chair they had strapped him into. 

‘Where is Steve?’ he had demanded, still as a panther. ‘What have you done with him?’

Nilsson had laughed. ‘What’s the time?’

Bucky had told him, frowning. Nilsson cracked his neck, then turned that awful smile onto Bucky once again. He said, ‘He’s off making sure none of you can ever be deprogrammed again.’

It had admittedly taken Bucky longer than he liked to figure out what the man meant. He had always played mind games, when he wasn’t busy ripping them apart with electricity. An hour later, Natasha had had to hold Bucky back as he tore back into Nilsson’s holding cell with wild eyes.

He hadn’t even had to say anything. Nilsson had just grinned in delight. ‘

‘Ah, Winter Soldier. Please commend him on his deprogramming efforts for me at his funeral, he really did try his best,’ Nilsson had said. ‘Hail Hy-’

Bucky had slammed his metal fist into the side of Nilsson’s face before Natasha could stop him. His head had cracked sickeningly and he stopped moving, slumping in his chair. Bucky was off again, racing through their Wakandan safehouse to find a way back to New York as fast as he could. 

‘Barnes! Barnes, what the hell is going on?’ Natasha had demanded.

Bucky gritted out, ‘Nilsson’s not dead, just knocked out. I have to get to New York.’

‘New York? Barnes-’

‘Hydra’s sent Steve after Tony,’ he had told her, his lungs too big for his chest. ‘They want to destroy B.A.R.F. and kill Tony, keep him from deprogramming any of their assets ever again.’

The blood had drained from her face. She swore, loudly, in Russian.

‘I will go with you. The other Rogues will come as well, if I ask,’ she said.

‘You need to stay here to protect Shuri and Wilson. They’re going to be sending assets after them too, they worked closely with Tony on the tech. If something- something happens to Tony, then they’re the only ones that might be able to rebuild B.A.R.F.,’ Bucky told her.

‘You can’t go on your own,’ she insisted.

‘I’ll be faster, we don’t know how long Steve has been after him. He might even already be there. None of you will stand a chance against Steve, not while Thor and Captain Marvel are off world,’ he told her.

She repeated, ‘You don’t have to go on your own.’

Bucky wheeled around to stare at her, feeling as though his feet would barely hold him upright. ‘I left him alone. We all did. We did this.’

She fell silent. Then: ‘I will get you a plane.’

Bucky had nodded, too overwhelmed to respond. He had already started running through calculations in his head, each of them too devastating to see through to their end.

That had been eight hours ago. Those calculations are worse now. For once in his life, it had been easier when he was just a brainwashed asset off on a mission. As he slips through traffic with the New Avengers Tower looming over him, the sheer panic and fear has already set in.

Bucky has no way of contacting Friday, she’s always been the one to ping him first. Some security measure Tony had built in ages ago before he had let Bucky into the New Avengers, before he trusted him. Instead, he calls Peter.

‘Peter? Peter, where are you?’ he asks, wired through his earpiece.

‘Mr Barnes? I’m in Queens. Am I supposed to be talking to you, I thought-’

‘Get to the tower right now, I’m en route. Tony’s in trouble, I need you to stay downstairs until I tell you to come up,’ he tells him.

He hangs up before Peter can respond, knowing the kid will be there and do anything in his power to help Tony. He makes another call, one that he knows will break his heart.

Foggy picks up. ‘Bucky? Christ, am I supposed to be talking to you?’

‘Call Ross. Call Ross and tell him we need a full perimeter around Avengers Tower, medical team and big guns, the works,’ Bucky insists.

‘Is Tony okay?’ Foggy asks immediately, because he’s always been quick.

Something catches in Bucky’s throat. His vision blurs, his grip on the handles slack. ‘I don’t know. Steve’s after him.’

Foggy exhales sharply. ‘Fuck. Okay, fuck, fuck, fuck, okay, I’ll sort something out. Do you need backup? I know a guy, he’s close by. He’s no super soldier, but he’s strong.’ 

‘I need someone to stand by with Spider-Man outside the Tower. In case I can’t. I can’t-’

‘Anything you need,’ Foggy tells him, immediately.

‘Thank you,’ Bucky says, then hangs up.

He’s at the base of Avengers Tower now and doesn’t even bother parking the bike, just jumps off and tosses it to the side of the pavement. As he races to the front door, Friday boots up in the key panel and scans his features. 

‘Friday, where’s Tony?’ Bucky demands. 

The door slides open instantly, revealing the long hallway and the elevator shaft at the end up to the Tower. She says, ‘Please go to the laboratory immediately, Sergeant Barnes.’

It’s the closest to concern that the AI can get and as Bucky moves towards the lift, there’s an explosion. It rattles the very window frames of the buildings around them and he slams his hand against the wall for balance, looking for the cause of it around him. Then he realises it’s come from up above and his head cracks upwards. Thick black smoke plumes out of the side of Avengers Tower, blue lightning tendrils of light spitting in the aftermath.

Bucky doesn’t think, he just throws himself into the lift. It’s agony waiting those few seconds to get up onto the laboratory floor but when he does, his mind goes white. Not empty like when he was brainwashed, but full of rage as potent as a repulsor blast. 

Steve is standing over Tony’s broken body, a plate of metal in his hands and raised over the crumpled metal suit. B.A.R.F. is in pieces at the side, the cot Bucky spent so much time in mangled amidst flames burning across the lab. Bucky moves instantly, gun in his hand as he fires off a shot that punctures Steve’s palm. Steve flinches, his hold on the plate weakening - but he still brings it down.

Bucky has been teased by Tony and Shuri for his eerie silence when he fights, but he’s screaming now. He screams as he sees the plate crash through Tony’s metal chest and he screams as he tears Steve off of him, throwing him with all his might away from Tony with his whirring metal arm. The visor is up and Tony is so pale, eyelashes fluttering as he struggles to breathe.

‘Tony. Tony, sweetheart, please,’ he begs, trying to shake him awake. 

Tony’s head falls to the side, a sickly stream of blood slipping down his cheek. He’s still breathing, but it comes in rattling gasps. He’s unconscious. Dying.

Steve rises, his body a mottled wet mess of raw muscle and blood. He turns to Bucky, his mouth twisted and his eyes dull. He says, ‘We have orders to return to base. Will you come willingly, or will I have to bring you in?’

‘Stevie, don’t do this,’ Bucky pleads.

There’s a noise behind Steve which draws both of their attention. Peter is here despite his orders to stay down below, his white eyes wide as he takes in the scene. Steve turns to him, a titan in the wreckage ready to destroy him.

And god, Tony loves Peter like nothing else. So Bucky raises his gun and his hands don’t even shake as he shoots his best friend in the heart.

Foggy has never considered himself a hero of any kind, let alone a super one. He’s always left the superheroics to Matt, Shuri and, occasionally and begrudgingly, Frank Castle. He still can’t explain why he had raced over to Avengers Tower from his glitzy law office in downtown Manhattan the moment he received Tony’s call, as though he would in any way be able to help with whatever was going down there.

He arrives too late. Ross has already set up a perimeter, stone-faced at the side as Avengers Tower bleeds smoke. He spots Matt in his Daredevil red suit, speaking quietly to Spider-Man at the side who is sitting heavily on the pavement. There’s no sight of Tony, Bucky or Steve.

‘Where’s Tony?’ Foggy immediately asks.

Spider-Man looks away. Daredevil puts a hand on his shoulder and says, ‘He’s in with the medics in the van. Sergeant Barnes is with him.’

‘Is he…’ Foggy begins.

A strangled noise escapes Spider-Man from behind the mask. Matt’s hold on his shoulder tightens in support. ‘He’s fighting.’

‘And Captain America?’ Foggy asks.

‘Barely alive, but in transit to the RAFT. Bullet just missed his heart, but he’s critical and they’ll operate on him there,’ Matt says.

‘I need to talk to Bucky,’ Foggy says, trying to work his way through the impending brain fog. Spider-Man points in the direction of a van, his hand shaking.

Foggy goes, but not before clasping Matt in a grateful hug. He’s stopped before he can even get within a couple of meters to Tony, told it’s a sensitive situation right now. There’s a tap at his shoulder and Ross is beside him, gesturing with a nod of the head to the side.

‘General Ross,’ Foggy greets him, his eyes flickering to the sealed off van. He can see people moving around in its windows. Tony must be on a stretcher, out of view, dying.

Ross tells him quietly, ‘I told Barnes to go for a smoke. He’s in the lift to the tower, tell him Captain Rogers is stable and contained.’

‘And Tony?’ Foggy asks.

Ross’ mouth pulls into a thin line. ‘Just go to Barnes. He needs someone like you right now.’

Foggy doesn’t know what he means by that, but he goes anyways. Ross presses a bottle of water, towel and a clean shirt into Foggy’s hands. He doesn’t know what he’s meant to do with it but he takes it all anyways. Friday silently lets him into the tower, revealing a slumped over figure on the floor - a cigarette lit between fingertips. 

The lift doors are open at the end of the lobby and Foggy feels the bile rise in his throat. Beyond it, the pristine glass walls are completely covered in blood. 

‘Bucky,’ Foggy calls out.

Bucky looks up, swallowing. He’s worse off than the lift, absolutely caked in blood. Foggy understands now why Ross gave him the shirt and towel.

Foggy sits beside him on the ground, four hundred dollar suit be damned. He passes Bucky the bottle of water and they sit in silence, failing to take everything in. Eventually, Foggy says, ‘Shitty day at the office, huh?’

Bucky doesn’t laugh, but something does quirk at his mouth. He opens the bottle and takes a long sip, responding, ‘Easily the shittiest.’

‘Ross, uh. Ross wanted me to tell you Captain America is stable,’ Foggy ventures.

Bucky nods stonily. ‘But he didn’t say anything about Tony?’

Foggy swallows. ‘He’s still in the van with the medics.’

Bucky takes the towel from him, pouring water over it and wiping at his face. Every wipe comes back scarlet red and Bucky just looks at it, clasped tight between his hands. ‘When I left him, I knew he wanted to ask me to stay. He didn’t though. He knew I had to go after Steve, so he let me go. And this happened anyways.’

‘Nobody had any idea this was going to happen,’ Foggy tells him quietly.

‘When I shot Steve, I was going for the kill. I didn’t even think about it. The only reason Steve survived was because he had a burner phone in his front pocket,’ Bucky says tonelessly.

‘None of this is your fault. Captain America would have wanted you to stop him. Tony wouldn’t blame you for any of this either,’ Foggy says.

Bucky snorts. ‘No, but he’d be mad as hell anyways.’

‘Then he can shout at you all he likes when he’s better,’ Foggy says firmly.

‘They really didn’t say anything about Tony?’ Bucky presses.

‘No,’ Foggy says.

No news is good news. Or maybe bad news, when it comes to top secret government agencies. Foggy doesn’t know what to think, but Tony - against all odds - is his friend too. He’s rattled to his core, but being in control is why he’s as good at his job as he is. The doors to the lobby slide open and Matt is standing there, looking absolutely ridiculous in his crimson spandex.

‘Spider-Man’s asking if he can see Sergeant Barnes,’ Matt says.

Foggy looks at Bucky, who nods tiredly. Matt raises his head and his nostrils flare slightly as he sniffs, staring sightlessly around the room. Then he adds, ‘You might want to change your shirt and shut those lift doors before I bring him through.’

Friday obeys without even being given a command, sliding the doors shut. Foggy takes Bucky’s shirt from him, trying not to think about how warm the blood is, as Bucky scrubs at his skin more roughly than necessary with the towel to rid himself of the stains. Foggy wraps his discarded shirt in the towel, bundling it into a pile which he throws behind a plant pot. There’s no saving the gory trail of blood which leads up to the lift, but they’ve done what they can.

‘Hands, Foggy,’ Bucky says.

Foggy looks down and realises his palms are bright red. A wave of dizziness comes over him when he realises it's Tony's blood.

‘Oh my god,’ he says. He can’t say anything else.

Bucky takes control and douses them in the last of the water. Foggy wipes them on his suit trousers, right as Matt leads Spider-Man in. Spider-Man doesn’t say anything, just lingers at the doorway. Foggy and Matt look to Bucky.

Bucky simply smiles, exhaustion creased into every inch of his face. ‘Don’t just hover there, you’re making me nervous. Get over here.’

Spider-Man does, burying himself under Bucky’s extended arm. He curls up against him on the floor as Bucky pulls him close, murmuring to him quietly. It’s too quiet for Foggy to hear, but Matt clearly does and he gently tugs at Foggy’s elbow.

‘Let’s leave them alone for now,’ Matt says. 

Foggy glances back and sees Spider-Man pull the mask over his head, then looks away as fast as he can before his face is revealed. He’s no genius, but based on how small and broken Spider-Man looked against Bucky, he knows he's only a child.

If Tony could do it all again, he would have asked Bucky to stay. Too many people have left him in this lifetime and when Bucky had said he was leaving, he had just accepted it was always going to happen. He had been furious and upset, of course. But not surprised. There was always something more important, or easier to live with, than Tony Stark.

But he would be more selfish, if he could do it all again. He would have spent less time out of the tower and more in it, warm and sunkissed on Bucky’s terrace with a cup of Shuri’s tea and the smell of tobacco in his nose. He would have been less careful with Bucky to begin with, he would have let his guard down earlier. 

He would have fallen in love with him more quickly. He would have given them more time.

When he wakes up, he has no idea where he is. There’s a mechanical beep beside his ear, a shrill, annoying thing, and the sound of rainfall against the thatched bamboo roof above him. The walls are lined with animal hides and skins and one of the curved walls is a stunning vista of floor to ceiling windows, revealing the thick green jungle beyond. A shiny metropolis rises beyond it, the buildings unlike any Tony has ever seen. 

‘Some Hydra base,’ he croaks out, his voice ragged.

There’s a shift of movement to his left. Tony is too weak to turn to see it, he feels as though he’s had a building thrown at him. Red fabric, a red dashiki, comes into view and he peers up blearily and sees bright swimming pool eyes. 

‘Christ. Don’t tell me they got you too,’ Tony says. 

Bucky brushes the hair back from his face, or at least, what’s left of it. He can feel stitches tugging at the side of his head, someone must have shaved him. Bucky tells him, ‘We’re safe. We’re in Wakanda. We’ve just been waiting for you to wake up.’

Tony laughs and then gasps in pain, his ribs exploding with the agony of it. Bucky immediately sits down on the side of his bed, calming him with soft touches as he asks where it hurts. 

‘Steve?’ Tony asks, once the pain has subsided.

A shadow falls over Bucky’s face. ‘He’s stable. Shuri and Sam are working on his treatment.’

‘He destroyed B.A.R.F.. I had a miniature in my drawer in the tower. It was ready, but I don’t know if it made it out,’ Tony says immediately.

Bucky nods. ‘Friday found it, they’ve been using it. It’s going to be a long road, but he’ll be okay. He’s a better fighter than I am.’

‘Maybe,’ Tony says, and his chest hurts. ‘But you always hold the line.’

Bucky’s face crumples. It happens so quickly, so easily, that Tony burns to think of how long he’s needed to. He tries to reach up to touch him, but his wrist is bound in thick plaster and he can hardly shift the dead weight. He struggles, then says pathetically, ‘Get down here and kiss me.’

Bucky laughs, then does so. Tony shifts and Bucky slips carefully into the bed beside him, pressing his forehead to the side of Tony’s face. The sound of Bucky’s breathing, slow and steady, is a ballad he's memorised by now. 

'Hey. I've got something to tell you,’ Tony begins. 

Bucky’s hand slides over his chest and the new scar there, a comforting weight. Tony’s heart knocks against it like a front door. 

Bucky hums and his eyelashes whisper against Tony's cheek when he closes his eyes. ‘Tell me in a bit and just let me stay with you a bit longer. We’ve got time.’