Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Valentina stands on her tip toes, eyes scanning the room of new arrivals, trying to find the unmistakable form of her best friend. Her skin was electric, practically buzzing with energy as she searches almost frantically. She's been on Cloud 9 since she got that phone call from her best friend, finally saying that she was coming home. She found it interesting that it was in the middle of the semester, but she quickly shakes it off, excitement taking over when she realized that in less than a week her best friend was going to be back.

Taller than most, especially in heels, it should've been really easy to find her, but it hits her for a second that she might look different now and be different now. There was an inkling of dread and something else mixed in that couldn’t name settle in her bones at how different she would be already, but she pushes it aside, not wanting anything to dampen her mood right now.

It's been three years since they last saw each other in person, their schedules never matching up for visits. Not even the holidays were enough to bring her back into the country. She was so thankful that the time difference was only an hour, making it easier to keep in touch, her phone and her laptop became her best friends. Three years doesn't seem to be a lot, but when she left, she was a fetus, barely out of high school.

She shakes that thought off, focusing instead of finding her, finally being able to see her with her own eyes.

Valentina steps back when a heavyset man was about to run her over with his luggage, clearly not caring on who he's about to bowl over, making her step right into someone. She grabs them by the arm, steadying them and her to make sure they both don't fall over in the busy airport, an apology on her lips when the person beats them to it.

"Val?"

Valentina steps back from the person when she hears her name. Her eyes widen when she sees her standing in front of her. In the flesh, after three years.

She was right. She did change. The lanky, awkward limbs were gone, her hair was shorter and darker from when she left. The softness around her face was gone and was replaced with sharp cheekbones and an even sharper jaw.

Her eyes, though, were still the same, expressive, big and never fails to pull an emotion out of Val. She swears she feels her heart swells, finally being able to see her brown eyes without the blur of the phone screen, hindering how bright and colorful they really are.

Valentina squeals, yanking Juliana into her arms. "Jules!" She hears Juliana laugh and she tightens her arms around her. She buries her face into the crevice of where Juliana's neck meets her shoulder, breathing in the smell of recycled air and something that was wholly Juliana’s.

"Relax, Val," Juliana says, the touch of laughter still in her voice, her hand immediately resting on the crown of Valentina's head, her other arm around her waist tightening.

They stand there for a second, each taking the other in.  The last three years of their friendship was pure digital communication, taking a huge strain on their friendship.

Valentina pulls back first, keeping a hand on her arm, and looks up at her. "Why are you so tall?" She looks at her, up and down. She lightly kicks Juliana's boots. "You're wearing heels!"

"And you're wearing sneakers!" Juliana says as they both look down at their choice of footwear.

Valentina shakes her foot as if showing off the black Chuck Taylors, pulling giggles from the both of them. She doesn't know if it was the giddiness of having her best friend physically in her life again or if it was something else, but now seeing and being able to hold her, Valentina hadn't felt as light as she did now.

"Here let me," Valentina says as she grabs the duffle bag that was hanging on Juliana's shoulder. She swings it onto hers, grunting. "What is in here? A dog?"

"It's alright, Princess. I got this," Juliana laughs about to put the duffle bag back onto her shoulder.

Valentina stops her, stepping back, playfully glaring at Juliana for using that nickname. She grabs the duffle bag. "You're still on that?"

Juliana smiles, putting her arm around Val's and tugging her back onto her side. "You'll always be my Princess."

Valentina intertwines their hands, pulling her to the exit where the car was waiting. Valentina whines in displeasure.

"You're the one that wanted me to call you that!"

"We were 9!" Val laughs. She grabs Juliana by the arm, abruptly stopping them. She looks up at Juliana, batting her blue eyes. "Please?"

Juliana inhales sharply as she looks down at Valentina's blue eyes. She shakes her head as if clearing her head, before tugging her again to get them to move. "And we pinky-promised forever," Juliana reminds her. "And I never back out on our pinky promises!"

Valentina feels a flash of anger at her words. You broke one. She stops her thought, reminding herself that Juliana was back and that should be the end of that.

"I hate you," Valentina mutters, pouting.

"No, you don't."

"No, I don't,” Valentina sighs.

Juliana squeezes her hand once, letting herself be pulled by Valentina. "You know I'm surprised you actually came to pick me up. I was looking for Alirio when you bumped into me."

Val's disdain for driving was well-known, especially driving around high-stress areas like the airport or anytime she has to go downtown. She preferred to be driven either by her drivers or by Juliana. She has her license, but she'll moan and groan about driving until Juliana gives in ( "Like the princess you are," Juliana teases, ignoring Val's side-eye).

"Oh I didn't drive here," Val says. She stops and points at the black SUV, Alirio already by its side, waiting for them. "Alirio drove me."

Juliana nods, stifling a laugh. "Oh, there's the Princess."

"You're such an ass," Val says, rolling her eyes, trying to hide the smile that won't stop tugging the corner of her lips upward.

They walk to the waiting car, hands still intertwined. Valentina doesn't have the urge to let go, not realizing that the last three years of not being able to touch her were pure torture for someone that thrives off of touch. It's like she couldn't keep her hands to herself now that she's here.

"Hey, Alirio." Valentina holds up the duffle for him to take.

"Hi, Alirio," Juliana greets letting the older man take her luggage to put in the back. "Nice to see you again, man."

"Hello Ms. Juliana," Alirio greets warmly as he packs her luggage into the car. "Maybe now that you're here Ms. Valentina wouldn't be as grumpy."

"Alirio," Valentina gasps as if offended, though the lightness in her eyes belies any real anger. "Stop ratting me out." She pulls Juliana towards the door of the car. "C'mon before he spills anymore of my secrets."

"You're keeping secrets from me?" Juliana calls over her shoulder as Valentina crowds behind her,  ushering her to go inside the car.

"Gotta keep some of the mysteries, right?" Valentina asks as she steps into the car, sliding into the seat.

They settle into the seat, their arms, sides of their thighs and bodies touching. She feels Juliana lean her full weight against her. It serves as a nice reminder that she was actually here. Valentina reaches up and plays with the ends of her hair, unable to stop herself.

"What mysteries?" Juliana guffaws, leaning her head on Val's shoulder, closing her eyes.

"All the more to keep them," Valentina says, her nose crinkling.

Juliana wanted to stifle a laugh as that was a sure sign that Valentina wanted to change the subject. Mysteries, she wanted to scoff.

"What do you wanna do first? Shopping, food? Oh! What about the park?" Valentina lists, voice a little faster than usual as if they were short on time.

"Relax, Val," Juliana says, rubbing Valentina's stomach.

Valentina inhales sharply, stiffening. She feels her stomach in knots at Juliana's touch, goosebumps rising on the surface. As if not knowing the effect of her ministrations, Juliana continues.

"We have time," Juliana whispers. She tugs on Val's shirt, getting her attention. She waits until Val looks down, eyes imploring. "Can we go back to your place? I just wanna take a nap right now."

Valentina nods, gently pushing her head back down on her shoulder.  She feels Juliana's nose brushing against her shoulder, settling. It didn't take long for the lull of the car to rock Juliana to sleep, breaths even, but her hand still gripping the fabric of Val's shirt tightly as if afraid to let go.

--*--

"What?" Juliana asks, stopping mid-chew when she realizes Valentina was just staring at her, almost gazing. Her hand flies to her teeth. "Is there something in my teeth?"

Valentina doesn't answer, just continue to gaze at her, her eyes were soft.

"Val?" Juliana asks, amused. Her head tilts waiting for an answer.

Valentina shakes her head. At Juliana's raised eyebrow, she relents. "I just can't believe your back," Valentina says as she lifts her glass of water to hide the smile that seemed to be permanently etched on her face since Juliana's arrival. “I thought you were loving Parsons?”

Juliana rests her head on her palm. Valentina sees something flash in her eyes before Juliana shrugs. “It was fun. I learned a lot. But I just wanted to come home. So last year I took the double the max amount of credits plus a couple of more classes and took summer classes so I can come home.”

Valentina narrows her blue eyes at her, making it even sharper than it usually is. “Who hurt you?”

Juliana looks taken aback at her question. “N-n-no one,” she stammers, picking at the napkin that was on her lap.

“Juls-”

“No, Val,” Juliana interrupts. “I don’t wanna talk about it. It’s done and over with.”

“If someone hurt-”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Juliana interrupts, her hand balling the napkin into a fist, refusing to meet Valentina’s eyes.

Valentina sighs, but holds up her hands, palm up, backing up. “I’m sorry,” she apologizes.

Juliana sighs, her eyes shutting as she takes a deep breath. She reaches over and grabs Valentina’s fingers, entwining them again. She squeezes it. “No, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to snap at you.”

“Just if you’re ready to talk about it, don’t be afraid to tell me okay?” Valentina says. Her blue eyes were intense, but they were soft and sincere.

Juliana nods, playing with Valentina’s fingers, but still refusing to meet her eyes.

“Wanna go watch a movie?” Valentina asks, trying to dispel the tension in the air that she unmistakably created.

Juliana clears her throat. “Sure, but you pick.”

Valentina groans. “Why do I always pick?”

“Because you’re so picky!”

--*--

“Okay like here why do they always do that?” Valentina asks as she points to the screen, exasperated an hour into the movie (actually standing up and touching the television, as if that would help Juliana figure out what she was talking about).

Juliana was surprised she was able to keep her mouth shut until then. She says this and Val glares at her.

“Doesn’t it bother you?”  

“No,” Juliana laughs. She pats the space above her head where Val was sitting before abruptly standing up. “Now come back and shut your brain off for a moment. I need my pillow back.”

“You only want me for my body,” Valentina teases as she sits down, gathering Juliana’s head and putting it back on her lap.

“Only when we watch movies,” Juliana says, making herself comfortable. She curls her body up tight, hugging her knees.

Valentina settles against, her hand immediately going up to Juliana’s hair and carding through it, soothingly. Valentina tries to heed Juliana’s advice, she really did, but the movie was bordering on ridiculous and she was about to point it out to her when she realizes that Juliana was lightly snoring.

Valentina stifles a giggle as she carefully maneuvers herself to the floor, careful not to jostle Juliana so she can look at her face.

Her eyes were closed, her fist tucked underneath her chin, breathing softly. Looking so peaceful that Valentina wanted to curl up right next to her and nap. The flight must’ve really taken it out of her, despite it being less than 6 hours.

She gazes at her for a moment, afraid that if she leaves her that it would just be a dream and she’ll be back in her dorm.  She lightly strokes her face, from the tops of her forehead to the cleft her chin, her brain still trying to register that Juliana was really here less than a foot away and not a plane ride away. She swears that even asleep Juliana was one of the most interesting people that Valentina had met.

Juliana’s phone vibrates loudly on the coffee table, pulling her out of her thoughts. She snatches it from the table quickly, silencing it. She looks down at the phone, her interest piqued at the name on the screen, or lack thereof. Instead of a name, it was an emoji. The heart emoji to be exact, well a lot of heart emojis. It wasn’t just a red one.

She doesn’t know why but she feels her stomach clench and take a nose-dive, her heart thudding loudly against her ribs. She doesn’t know whether or not to answer the call. It had to be the boy that hurt Juliana, why else would this be their name under her phone?

She glances over her shoulder to make sure Juliana was still asleep. Her finger hovers over the green and red icon. The call stops and she heaves a small sigh of relief at not having to decide. She looks at Juliana and down at her phone, pulling her lips between her teeth as she tries to figure out what to do.

“Damn it,” she mutters to herself as she puts the phone in her pocket to keep it away from Juliana while she was taking a nap, but deciding not to snoop any further. Juliana’s privacy and trust were worth more than knowing the information now.

She goes upstairs to her room to grab her laptop and plants herself on the counter in the kitchen. Far enough not to disturb her, but close enough that she can hear her if she starts waking up. She munches on an apple as she surfs the internet, switching tabs between YouTube, Instagram, and her homework. She hears the side door to the kitchen open and she looks up to see Guille walk in.

“I thought you had plans with Renata today?” She asks as Guille drops a kiss on her forehead in greeting.

“I forgot she had a girl’s thing,” Guille says sitting next to her. He gestures to the living room. “Who’s the girl on the couch?” He wiggles his eyebrow, his implication clear.

“Don’t be an ass, perv,” Valentina says hitting him on the shoulder. “It’s Juliana.”

Guille looks floored, his eyes widening and his eyebrows raising up. His head swivels to the direction of the living room and then back to Valentina. “Juliana…. Your Juliana?”

Valentina feels something unidentifiable, between a bit of proudness and happiness that in her family’s mind that they were one and the same. Juliana and Valentina.  “Yeah, do you know any other Julianas?”

“Holy,” Guille says to himself, still in disbelief. “When she left, she looked like a literal-”

“Finish the sentence, Guille, I dare you,” Juliana says from the archway, an eyebrow raised, drawing the siblings’ attention to her. “I can still beat you up.”

“First of all, Juliana, ” Guille says, enunciating her name, the way that he did when they were kids, annoying the shit out of Juliana. “We were like 12, so don’t get your hopes up on that rematch.”

“ You were 12, I was 9,” Juliana says as she sits next to Valentina, who offers her a bite of her apple. She takes a bite out of it before handing it back to her. “I can’t find my phone. Have you seen it?”

“Oh yeah,” Valentina says as she fishes it out of her pocket. “You got a phone call and I didn’t want it to disturb you so I took your phone with me.”

Juliana was already unlocking it, her face paling when she sees the screen. Without so much as a thank you or any other words, really, she strides to the backyard, phone pressed to her ear.

Valentina watches her for a second, eyebrow raised. “Okay…”

“Must be an important phone call,” Guille mutters as he moves to the fridge to grab something to eat. “I’m assuming you’re going to spend the whole day with her? Has she visited her mom yet?”

Valentina nods. “No, not yet and that’s the plan. We don’t know what we’re doing yet, but  you wanna come with us?” She extends the invitation but deep down she didn’t want him to take it.

“Nah,” Guille says, voice muffled as his head was in the fridge. “Don’t want to be a third wheel.”

Valentina sputters, the apple bits flying from her mouth. “What?”

“I don’t wanna be a third-wheel,” Guille reiterates.

“You won’t,” Valentina assures him, confused at the implication.

“It’s fine,” Guille says, “Spend time with your girl. Maybe now you won’t be as moody.”

Valentina takes the last bite out of her apple before chucking at her brother’s face. “Shut up!” Her eyes catch Juliana’s pacing form in the backyard, phone still pressed tightly to her ear, hands gesturing wildly, something that Valentina wasn’t used to seeing. Juliana was usually the guarded one, so much so that a lot of people that she was cold when they first meet her as emotions never seem to take over her body, very rarely it does, always close to the heart.

Now that’s different. She was still guarded, but she was much more touchy. Valentina wasn’t sure if it was the newness of being close to each other again, physically or if it was because of Parsons.

“She’s different,” Valentina says, eyes still trained on Juliana’s form.

“Of course, she is,” Guille says. “I mean other than the physical attributes-”

“I swear to God, Guille,” Valentina mutters darkly.

“-I’m joking, ” Guille says. “It’s been three years, Vale. And college changes you. You find out things you never knew about yourself.”

“Do you think she’s still my Juliana?” Valentina asks, her voice tinged with worry and concern. For what though, she wasn’t sure.

“No, probably not,” Guille says truthfully as he lays a palm on her arm, comforting his little sister. “That’s a good thing, Vale.”

“Yeah,” Valentina agrees though her voice doesn’t seem as convinced, eyes never leaving Juliana’s form.

“You’ll just get to know this Juliana better,” Guille assures her. He eats the leftover food on his plate. He makes a face before using the napkin to spit it out. “Did Chivis make anything else?”

Valentina nods, distractedly as Juliana comes in. “Everything good?” She asks, seeing her face much more pinched than before.

Juliana nods, running her hands through her hair, sighing. “Yeah, yeah. I think I wanna go see my mom.”

Valentina jumps up, closing her laptop. “I’ll go with you.”

Juliana smiles but shakes her head. “No, I have to talk to her about something. She doesn’t exactly know I came home early.” She pockets her phone and pulls Valentina into a hug. “I’ll come by later, okay?”

“Okay,” Valentina says, wanting to tighten her hold on Juliana, but she was already out of her arms and out of her house before she can blink. That gnawing feeling that briefly appeared earlier in the day was back and this time it wasn’t just an inkling.

"Well that's awkward," Guille comments from his perch on the counter, no longer eating his food, just watching the two.

Valentina glares at her brother, annoyed. "Shut up, Guille!"

Chapter Text

Juliana lays on Valentina’s bed, curled up, her pillow pressed against her front. She buries her face there, pressing it against her eyes harder to stop her tears from flowing. She can feel Valentina’s weight across her back, rubbing her head.

“He’s a stupid head,” Valentina whispers as she tries to soothe the younger girl.

“Bad word,” Juliana mumbles, her voice muffled against the blue cotton pillowcase.

“Stupid isn’t a bad word.”

“Uh-huh. Chivis said it is.”

“Chivis can be a stupid head too,” Valentina mutters.

“Don’t say that!” Juliana gasps, yanking her head away from Valentina’s hand. She ducks her head under the covers, trying to calm the sudden rush of anger that swept through her at Valentina’s words.

She feels Valentina shift before Valentina joins her under the covers. They were quiet, the blanket providing a warm cocoon as well and emphasizing their breathing.

“You shouldn’t say those things about them,” Juliana whispers, still trying to control her anger, the tears still pushing against her eyes. “They want you and they love you.” In frustration, she pushes her fists against her eyes. “You’re lucky you have so many people that love you.”

Juliana closes her eyes even tighter. “I only have my mom.”

The blankets rub against her head as Valentina moves closer to her. She lays an arm around Juliana’s waist, fingers digging into her stomach as she tugs her to her. “You have me too.”

Juliana sniffles. “Promise?”

Valentina nods. She pulls the covers down before hooking her head on Juliana’s shoulder, trying to look into her eyes. She holds out her pinky, waiting for Juliana to hook hers onto it.

“What’s that?”

Valentina grabs her pinky and carefully manipulates her pinky until they’re hooked together. “Eva says this is a forever promise.”

Juliana tugs on their fingers, causing it to tighten around each other. “Promise.”

-

-

-

Valentina was brought out of her sleep when she feels her mattress dip under the sudden weight. She pops an eye open to see Juliana, laying down next to her, fist tucked underneath her chin, an apologetic, sheepish smile on her face. She feels Juliana tuck a piece of hair behind her ear.

"Sorry I didn't come back yesterday," Juliana whispers, as she plays with a lock of Valentina's hair between her fingers, twirling it. Her nervous tic.

Valentina turns her hips and back slightly, stretching her arms over her head. She groans, letting her spine pop before she turns back to Juliana, a small smile on her face. "It's okay. You guys probably had a lot of things to talk about."

Juliana frowns. They were supposed to, but it didn't end up the way she wanted it to. The restaurant was too busy, her mother couldn't take even a minute off. She ended up walking to Perlita's house and hanging out with her. "I brought you something." She nods at the plastic bag now sitting on Valentina's dresser.

Valentina visibly perks up at the mention of a present, knowing Juliana only brings her one thing. "Food?"

"Breakfast."

"We're having a picnic," Valentina says, sitting up, taking Juliana with her. "I'll grab some drinks and I'll meet you at our spot?"

Juliana nods and watches Valentina grab a light sweater, shrugging it on, her excitement palpable. One of the things she hated when she left for Parsons was the fact that she couldn't take Valentina with her (even if they did have a fight the night before she had to leave). Valentina always had this way around her. She could always calm her down or hype her up whenever she needed it. Her first year at Parsons, she really needed her best friend. Although maybe it was her fault for imposing a visiting ban.

She feels a wad of paper hit her in her left eye, snapping her out of her head. "What?"

"You've had that frown on your face for the last minute," Valentina says standing in front of her, amused, shaking her head. "You okay?"

"Uh yeah," Juliana says, standing straighter. She offers her arm to Valentina. "C'mon. Food is getting cold."

Valentina rolls her eyes as she puts her arm through hers. "Hey, you're the one that's just standing there like an idiot."

"Quiet."

-

-

-

Valentina gestures for Juliana to climb into the treehouse first, hitching the tote bag filled with soda higher on her shoulder. "After you."

"Thank you, princess," Juliana responds, laughing when Valentina tries to swat at her butt. She climbs the ladder faster. When she gets to the landing, she kneels, ducking her head to avoid the branch that seems to be positioned with the intent of just hitting her face when she was younger. She scoots to the side to wait for Valentina to unlock the door. "Hey, watch out for the-"

"OW!" She hears Valentina behind her.

Juliana laughs, holding onto the railing on the side to keep her balance. She scoots a bit to make room as Valentina comes up.

"I keep forgetting to get that trimmed," Valentina says, rubbing her forehead.

Juliana turns to Valentina, stifling her laugh at the red mark on her forehead. "Aw, the poor Princess."

"Juliana," Valentina says, threateningly, glaring at her. The effect was there but all Juliana could do was laugh because it wasn't exactly threatening. It was cuter than anything. She opens the door, still on her knees.

"Never gonna get rid of that nickname," Juliana teases as she follows Valentina into the small treehouse. She stops at the entrance, confused at the new everything in the room. "You renovated?"

Valentina plops on the small beanbag in the corner of the room. She shrugs. "Yeah, a little project. Got bored."

"How long did it take?" Juliana asks. Her heart was beating unnecessarily loud, almost in fear, as she walks towards at one corner of the room.

"I don't remember," Valentina says. "Maybe three weeks? It was three years ago, at least." She was unpacking the meal that Juliana bought carefully laying it out on the small, short table that was more than big enough for when they were little girls, but now they barely can put their knees underneath it.

She looks up after setting up their meal to see Juliana still at the far side of the room, inspecting part of the wall. Her face as close to it as possible, scratching one spot with her finger.

Valentina smiles, already knowing what she's looking for. "I saved it."

Juliana looks over her shoulder, relief clear on her face. "You did?"

Valentina nods towards by the door.

Juliana looks by the door, squinting before crawling over there. "You renovated, moved walls but you couldn't make the roof higher?" Juliana grumbles.

"I thought college makes you tolerant of things, but all you've done is complain," Valentina teases.

Juliana reaches up and takes down the wooden panel that was hanging right above the doorway. She was surprised she didn't hit it with her forehead as she was entering the small space.  Her fingers trace the words that 6-year-old Juliana had diligently and painstakingly carved with a butter knife that she snuck out from under Chivis' nose.

Sorry, mi vida. Love, Juliana.

She carved it right after their first fight. It was something she's heard Valentina's father call Valentina's mother and Chivis and Tiberio. And she really thought she  It was a silly fight that only 6-year-olds can hold a grudge on. Juliana doesn't even remember the actual reason for the fight, but she does remember that overwhelming feeling of wanting to make something right. It wasn't unfamiliar, but the intensity of it was. She doesn't remember when she carved it. Probably in between Valentina stomping off and Chivis calling them for dinner, less than a 3-hour span.

"I didn't even know you knew it was there," Juliana comments as she carefully hangs it back up. She doesn't remember Valentina even acknowledging her well-intentioned vandalism project. She joins Valentina at the small table, carefully folding her legs to be more comfortable. She looks across from her Valentina's, her lanky waif-like figure scrunched up, knees against her chest. Juliana couldn't stop the loud laugh from escaping her lips.

Valentina glares at her, throwing a utensil at her. "Stop laughing!" She complains, her lips trying to twitch into a smile.

"I can't!" Juliana cries as collapses against the table, laughing harder at Valentina's current position.

-

-

-

"Good?" Juliana asks, tilting her cup to get the last of her soda out.

"From your mom's?" Valentina asks.

Juliana nods.

"Then always."

"What if I said I made it?"

Valentina smiles brighter. "Then even better."

"Smooth."

Valentina bows. "Thank you. Been working on  it." She fingers the edge of the cup. There was this weird tension in the air and it was unsettling to feel. Tension and Juliana don't go together. "How's your mom?"

Juliana purses her lips to keep herself from smiling. Instead, she leans back and looks up at the now mint-colored ceiling of the small treehouse. If she stretches her legs and points her toes, she bets she can reach it. A big contrast to how she had to jump when they were younger just to reach the ceiling. Everything seemed much smaller back then, even her problems.

She feels a nudge at the back of her calf and she looks towards Valentina, waiting for her to say something.

"You're thinking too hard," Valentina finally says. "You're basically screaming at me telepathically."

Juliana sits up and leans against the wall of the treehouse. She gazes at Val; wanting to memorize every facet of her face from her piercing blue eyes, ones that always gave her trouble (because every single damn emotion from it can bring her to her knees) to the end of her nose and the pout of her lips.

Three years without her best friend by her side was hard. She knew it was a risk basically banning Valentina, but she had to do it. The first year it was because she knew. She knew that just one look at Valentina would make her want to go back with her and not stay at Parsons. The 2nd and 3rd, she needed it as she tries to make everything work.

She got lucky that she got a great roommate that helped her out so much. If it wasn't for her, she didn't think it was possible to come home so early. She was supposed to be there for 5 years but ended up coming back after the 3rd. Homesickness and circumstances pushed her to do so.

"Can I tell you something?"

Valentina looks at her, eyebrows raised almost in surprised. "I'd be offended if you didn't."

"Were you mad that I wouldn't let you visit?"

Valentina glances down at the table, her fingers scratching at it, glaring at the mark she made. She thought the wood was stronger than that. She came to terms with that a long time ago and that question brought back some memories that she'd rather not revisit. "I thought you were going to tell me something."

"I will," Juliana says. "After you answer the question."

"You sure you want to hear this?"

Juliana hesitates, her hand tightening on her plastic cup. She remembers the silent treatment that she got when she asked Valentina for space. It wasn't until her first midterm when she called Valentina, stressed and freaked out that Valentina dropped the silent treatment. They never mentioned the ban, but Valentina respected her wishes and never visited. It hurt at first (she knows she had no right to feel that way since she asked for it) but throwing herself into work and school got rid of the separation anxiety she was feeling.

Valentina points at her, a small smile on her face, contrasting with her tone earlier. "You hesitated!" She reaches over and pats the hand that was holding onto the cup. "It's okay, babe. I'm over it."

Juliana raises an eyebrow in disbelief. "Really?" Juliana looks down at her cup, tilting it a bit to slosh the liquid inside. Her face pinches as she feels the first sting at the corner of her eyes. She bites the inside of her cheek, trying to keep herself from crying.

Valentina shrugs leaning back on her chair. "Yeah, I understand why you did it." She gestures at her body. "One look at me and you'd be wanting to go back," she teases. She was expecting Juliana to scoff, laughing, but when she looks up and sees her wet eyes, she freezes. "Oh, Jules."

"I'm sorry," she whispers, the words felt weird on her tongue, almost heavy. She wasn't used to saying sorry to Valentina with such sincerity and intensity. Not because they didn't say it and not mean it, but because of how rarely they said it with such tone. She was used to the reflexive sorry when she accidentally hits her with something or the dismissive sorry of when she’s late to something.  "It was dumb of me to do that."

Valentina shakes her head as she moves to Juliana's side. She strokes her head, from the tops of her hair to the end of it. "Yeah, but it helped you, right?" She pulls back a little to make sure Juliana can see her eyes, to show that she was telling the truth. She really was over it. The small renovation she did on their treehouse, as well as time, helped her come to terms with it. "I mean you came back almost two years earlier than planned."

Juliana stiffens, but her heart thrums even faster. She almost forgot why she came back so early in the first place. Being back at her home town made her forget the responsibilities that she left behind in New York. A little unnerving that she forgot even for a second, but welcomed as it let her mind be burden free even for just a couple of hours. "I-"

Valentina's arms tighten around her shoulders even more. "Hey, you're shaking."

Oh.

Juliana didn't even notice it.

"Hey," Valentina says, her voice soft as she brushes her hair behind her ear. "We can talk about it some other time." Her hands go down her arms, rubbing them as if to warm her up. "

Juliana leans into her even more, welcoming that patented Valentina comforts that she's missed this last three years. "But-"

Valentina shakes her head, her hand gripping her arm briefly to stop her before she lets go. "We can talk again when you're feeling better."

"No-"

Valentina tugs on her wrist. "C'mon, let's go for a drive."

-

-

-

"I like how you said let's go for a drive, but I ended up the one driving," Juliana comments as she expertly, but carefully maneuvers Valentina's car.

"I trust you with our lives more than I do," Valentina says as she plugs in the old iPod that she and Juliana have shared since they were in middle school.  "Besides you need it."

Of course, Valentina would know that distracting her brain with inane tasks would quickly bring her out of her funk. When they were younger, she always better at distracting Juliana than Juliana ever was with Valentina. Juliana quickly glances at what Valentina was fiddling with. She chokes on a laugh when she sees the purple thing that was plugged in. "You still have that thing?"

"Of course," Valentina says as she goes to the playlist that they always played when they needed cheering up. "Remember when you were so into K-pop and half of the songs on here were K-pop?"

"Why are you bringing up my dark past?"

"It's not the past when you were literally listening to it a couple of weeks ago."

Juliana purses her lips, trying to stifle her laugh. There was this burst of elation wanting to escape her chest as they fall into their easy banter. One of the things she thought they had lost. "Where are we even going?"

"Nice change of subject," Valentina comments as she finally chooses a song. Valentina laughs when she hears Juliana let out an inhuman sound of alarm.

"CHANGE IT!" Juliana screeches her right hand, searching blindly for the iPod or Valentina’s hand to knock it out.

Valentina giggles and moves further away from her reach turning the music up instead to further torture Juliana.

"You're evil, Valentina Carvajal," Juliana mutters, glaring at the road since she can't glare at her best friend. "Where are we going?"

Valentina looks up, scouting the street. She squints at the next streetlight, trying to read it. "Turn right on the next street." She finally changes the music, laughing at the relief on Juliana's face. They stop by a small coffee shop first, getting some snacks and drinks to go before hitting the road again.

Juliana follows her instruction, her body subconsciously bopping to the beat of the music. Valentina acts as an excellent shotgun, playing navigator, DJ, and successfully distracting Juliana with her ridiculous games and song choices that they ended up screaming along with as they cruise through the backroads of their small town.  She hadn't laughed this much since before she left for Parsons. Until finally Valentina instructs her to park at the side of the mostly deserted road that they've been driving for more than half an hour on.

Juliana puts the car in park and turns it off. She turns to Valentina, brows drawn in confusion. "Where are we?"

"Nowhere," Valentina says. "I just wanted to distract you."

"So we basically wasted gas," Juliana states.

"Eh," Valentina shrugs, dismissing her concern. It’s not like she can’t afford it  "How are you feeling?" Her eyes and tone soften as she looks at Juliana. The care and earnestness in her blue eyes were hard to miss.

Juliana stays still for a second, assessing her current state of mind. "Better now," Juliana says, honestly. There was a lightness in her that was hard to come by these days. "I feel better."

Valentina smiles, her eyes crinkling at the corners, the little dimple that Juliana fondly called her whiskers appearing. "Good." She leans back in her seat, putting the windows down. "So what did you wanna talk about at the treehouse?"

It was heavy. The shock she felt at remembering the reason she came back early in the first place. She doesn't know why she was nervous telling Valentina this. She knows out of all the people in her life, she was the one that's not going to walk out of her life because of this but nonetheless, she can feel her heart hammering against her ribs as if it was trying to escape.

She tries to figure out how to tell Valentina this. It was undoubtedly going to change their relationship and dynamic. It cannot not change. She plays with the tassels on Valentina's car keys, the small ministration helping her nerves.

"Jules?" Valentina lays a hand on her arm, trying to get her attention again. "You don't have to tell me if you're not ready."

"Do you remember my dad?" Juliana asks.

Valentina's brows furrow, trying to recollect a memory of this vague man that was barely in Juliana’s life,  and in turn was never in hers, really. She remembers the moodiness and the tears that came with his visits, but other than that, nothing. "What about him?"

"He has another daughter," Juliana says. Her hand tightens around Val's keychain when she hears her gasp.

"Wait, what?"

"That's what I thought too."

"It's not enough that he ruined my life-" Juliana's voice was hard, a tone that Valentina rarely heard from the younger girl. "-but he did to another daughter too."

"Start from the beginning," Valentina orders. The whiplash she was feeling at the news was mudding her brain as she tries to grasp what Juliana was explaining.

"I get to Parsons, right?" Juliana begins. She tells Valentina the story of how a social worker managed to find her halfway into the semester amidst her multiple projects, both for work and school, and midterms. She had laughed at the social worker's face, not believing her before slamming the door in her face to get back to her projects.

"Juliana," Valentina says, the disappointment clear both in her tone and eyes.

"I know," Juliana sighs. "It was shitty of me, but I was stressed out. She literally couldn’t have picked a worse time."

Valentina gestures for her to continue her story, listening intently.

Juliana pulls out her phone. "I didn't believe her at first," she says as she flips through the photos in her phone. "Until she showed me her picture." She holds it up, right against her face.

The gasp that fell from Valentina's face told her all that she needed to know. The likeness was uncanny. She looked exactly like a young Juliana with lighter features, no doubt from their father. But the shape of the face, the cleft on her chin, the big toothy smile was exactly like her sister's. It was like she was thrown back in time staring at this unfamiliar, but familiar face.

"Woah," Valentina says as she grabs the phone. She continues to hold it up against Juliana's face, eyes going back and forth trying to catalog all the similarities between them.  "You can't deny you guys are related." She locks the phone and hands it back to Juliana. "What's her name?"

The bark of laughter that Juliana lets out startles Valentina, making her jump in her seat.

"That's the worst part," Juliana says as she unlocks her phone again to look at her.

"What?"

"Her name is Juliana," Juliana says. Her hands clench into fists, biting her lip, trying to douse the fire of anger that manages to light up whenever she processes this information.

"What?" Valentina repeats, confused. "He named her after you?"

Juliana shakes her head, anger, and sadness blending low in her stomach. "It's more like he forgot he had another daughter named Juliana."

"I'm sure that's not it."

"I asked her, Val," Juliana says. "I asked if she knew she had an older sister." Juliana looks at Valentina, tears were filling up her eyes with the same reason that they had when they were younger. Then it was because of the disappointment, but now it was out of anger. "I hate him," Juliana spits the words out, her fists clenching harder.

"Jules," Valentina says, unsure of what to say, knowing right now nothing could make it better. Her palm cups Juliana's face, brushing the tears away that manages to fall.

Juliana laughs at herself. "She is such a sweet girl and he abandoned her too." She sighs. "What's worse is she actually remembers him. She remembers all the things they did together." Her eyes close as she leans into Valentina's touch, letting it calm her, ground her.

"Where's Juliana now?" Valentina asks, thumb still rubbing at the apple of her cheek.

"That's the thing," Juliana says. "She's coming to live with me."

Valentina stops rubbing her cheek at what she said. The word what slipping out of her mouth again. It felt like she’s uttered that more in the past hour than she ever did her whole life combined.

“Yeah,” Juliana says at her startled face.

“Really?”

“Val, I cannot just leave her in foster care,” Juliana says, her tone held no qualms. “Not when she could have a better life with me.”

“I wouldn’t expect you to,” Valentina says, her tone equally serious. “Your heart won’t let you.”

Juliana makes a face at the unexpected compliment. “You have too much faith in me.”

Valentina reaches over and pinches her cheek, making Juliana groan. “I just know you, babe.” She pats her on the cheek. “C’mon I’ll drive on the way back and you can tell me all about Juliana."