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2022-01-01
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2022-04-14
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lying gets you everywhere

Summary:

All Might himself said Izuku would be better off as a Police Officer; something less than a Hero.

Izuku watched on the side-lines as the Pros were prepared to watch Kacchan die, and he decided that he'll be better.

The perfect chance arose when an officer, Mikumo Akatani, was late for their first day at the Mufatsu Police Station and Izuku was there to fill in.

 

Or: The fic where Izuku takes All Might's advice and becomes a Police Officer through lies and fraud

Notes:

Ey!! This fic was heavily inspired by the quote "If you act like you’re supposed to be here, doing what you’re doing, nobody questions you.", hope you enjoy!!

(Also, as a heads-up, there are a few OCs in this. I know a lot of people don't like that [to be honest, I don't either] but which a fic that uses a place like the Precinct where there isn't a lot of known characters, it is kind of necessary. I do put a description of a character at the bottom of each chapter, so don't worry about not knowing anything about them!!)

Please note that I know nothing of how Police work, this is just made up based off of the Police Precincts I have seen in movies and stuff :) I am sure this is something that would never happen, this is just a fun idea I had :)))

here's a link to a Spotify Playlist I made for this: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0J9FRXQmx9lVRIPJZsYA9J?si=81bdaf9821404135

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: “Why yes hello, I am that man”

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The first lesson Izuku ever learned was that not all men were created equal.

 

While the world’s population was gifted with great quirks and powers, it had left Izuku out, causing him to be tormented and ridiculed for reasons he couldn’t control. Whether he is being used as a test subject for other kids’ quirks, or a scapegoat for anything that goes wrong, Izuku isn’t allowed to fight back. People without quirks have no power, and people without power don’t have a say in anything. Izuku can’t change this fact.

 

The second lesson was that everyone is only pretending to know what they’re doing; they’re all just as lost as he is.

 

This fact was made evident when he watched the heroes on standby as Kacchan was drowning in goo, no one making a move to help. He could overhear them complaining about not having the right quirk for the situation; anyone who could bypass the sludge would be harmed by the explosions and anyone who could deal with the explosions had a weakness to the sludge. Izuku couldn’t help the bubble of anger he felt, he was able to figure out eight different strategies in the short amount of time he had been watching, why were they just standing there when the solution was so simple?

 

The third lesson was that sometimes you just have to take matters into your own hands.

 

There was a moment of hesitation before Izuku rushed forward, bumping into people through the crowd before dipping under the police tape that was haphazardly set up. He barely heard the warnings of the other heroes before he slid over to where the group of heroes were set up, shouting out his analysis on the situation and what they can do to help.

 

Mt. Lady was the only one who immediately took Izuku for his word, trusting him that this would work.

 

Expanding her size to something substantial but not too large for the street, Mt. Lady ordered Kamui Woods to act as soon as possible. He seemed confused about what she meant until Mt. Lady scooped up the slime villain, leaving Kamuni to shoot out two thick strings of wood to catch Kacchan before he met the pavement. Just as Izuku saw the other heroes join in, he decided it would be best to get out of the area.

 

He’s quirkless, he isn’t supposed to help.

 

They wouldn’t have won without him.

 

Kacchan would be furious.

 

At least he’s alive.

 

Useless people aren’t supposed to do anything.

 

Izuku shook his head and continued making his way down the street, a simple task to do when everyone was more focused on celebrating another win for the heroes.

 

Just before he turned down the road to his apartment, Izuku looked back.

 

Mt. Lady was getting the recognition she deserved on her debut, Kacchan was being looked after, and Police officers were bordering the barriers they had set up.

 

They hardly seemed to be doing anything other than questioning Kacchan, but they were still on the scene. They didn’t do any of the heavy lifting and they were out of the spotlight. There was no need for them to go on raids when the heroes did that for them, there was no reason to go on television to state the situation when everyone would rather see the person who fought till it was over. Seemingly it was the perfect job for him.

 

A hero with no real need.

 

He laughed humorlessly to the air as he unlocked the door to his apartment.

 

 

 

 

After that day, Izuku seemed a bit bolder.

 

He almost always knew the answers in class, but never raised his hand because no one else did and he wanted to fit in. He never did because quirkless people weren’t supposed to be better than the quirked, they weren’t supposed to be good at something. So, he never raised his hand. But after that day, he did.

 

He would never correct a teacher if they had got a fact wrong because that was what they were supposed to teach them, they weren’t supposed to question it. And usually, Izuku never did. He went along with the ideas that were wrongly worded or composed or concepts that were so outrageous that he had to actually stop himself from asking for more just so he could see what really went wrong in his teacher’s head. He would never correct a teacher, but after that day, he did.

 

He never asked for anything more from a teacher, knowing that he wasn’t supposed to want to know more; that he wasn't supposed to be the top of the class, (he would be if they didn’t botch his grades) and that he wasn’t supposed to actually enjoy school. So he never asked for more. But after that day, he did.

 

And to his utmost glee, no one said anything about it.

 

Usually they’d protest and break him down, telling him that he’s cheating or bragging, but they didn’t.

 

In fact, other than the teachers who replied to his questions, no one had said a single thing to him.

 

This, of course, was due to the fact Kacchan wasn’t leading them, they never did seem to know what to do without a leader. So, while he was brooding over the recent attack that gave him sympathy from all around, Izuku was getting more confident.

 

This would be dangerous in the long run.

 

 

If you act like you’re supposed to be here, doing what you’re doing, nobody questions you.

 

 

Kneeling down by the corner of the police station, Izuku watched as an Officer cocked her head out the door every five minutes or so. She was waiting for something and Izuku was curious as to what.

 

Another one joined them outside, pushing a cup of coffee from hand to hand as they talked.

 

“Ah, I’m sure he’s just running late. Though it sucks for it to happen on his first day, I was really looking forward to meeting this new ‘Officer Mikumo Akatani’. I have a scheduled patrol out on the far side of Mufatsu so I don’t think I’ll still be here by the time he shows up. Which is a downright shame if you ask me.”

 

“I wasn’t asking you; I just need them to come soon because I hate waiting and I’m the one who has to show them around. You just want to meet them to see if you can be all buddy-buddy with them.”

 

“I mean, you’re not wrong about that,” the one Officer grinned before steadying their cup in one hand, tilting their head before patting their pocket and pulling out their phone. “Ah, welp, that’s the alarm, I gotta go. Have fun waiting for the guy.” They waved as they jumped down the precinct’s steps, leaving the other Officer to scoff after them.

 

Izuku had to flatten himself against the wall to prevent himself from being spotted. He always felt like somebody was watching, but he didn’t feel any extra eyes on him, so he’s pretty sure he’s well out of view.

 

Officer Mikumo, they had said.

 

Hm.

 

This was a horrible idea really, but, what if Izuku just waltzed up to that lady at the door and proclaimed himself to be this ‘Officer Mikumo’? He was sure that there was some sort of document that he would need, but he can wing it.

 

Confidence is everything, right?

 

Plus, this could get him to where he wants to be without having to wait for years on end. It’s not like he’ll ever actually have a chance to make it into UA, they still have a rule about quirkless students not being able to enroll in their school.

 

Izuku stood up as a car left the parking lot, ditching the top layer of his school uniform to leave a plain t-shirt and his school’s pants. Not quite the clothes a new recruit would wear, but at least less like an obvious middle schooler.

 

Taking in an extra gulp of air, Izuku stepped forward, hoping his bag was hidden well enough so no one would riffle through it, and he arrived at the steps.

 

Just as Izuku was about to do as he planned, the lady popped out the door again, her eyes immediately drawing to him. Her eyebrows drew down for a second until it pulled back up into a surprised expression.

 

“Oh! Mikumo! You’re really really late, what was the hold up?”

 

What?

 

Looking around, Izuku found that the lady was, in fact, talking to him. He didn’t even have to say anything, and she had already gone along with the lies.

 

“Ah sorry,” If he says he woke up late, she’ll think he’s irresponsible, if he says traffic then she’ll assume he could drive, and she’d see it was a lie seeing as the streets were currently clear. “I wasn’t used to the layout of the city here, I uh… Sort of got lost…” He waved his hands in front of himself, “But I promise it won’t happen again!”

 

The lady at the door hopped down the stairs, surprisingly, she was shorter than him. She threw her hands onto her hips as she looked him up and down, “So, Newbie, ready for a tour of the place? You have to fill out a few forms first but I’m sure that will pass by quickly. Since you’re right out of school, I’m sure you know that you’re basically just going to act as an intern, right?”

 

Ah, so Mikumo was new to the job, not just to this precinct. That was lucky on his part, he supposes. At least Mikumo wasn’t an officer with millions of awards and badges, Izuku had no idea what this job was about, and it would be very suspicious for a man who had been so highly regarded to seem as though he had never even stepped foot in front of another officer.

 

“Yup, I’m definitely not planning on going out on any-” Raids? Shoot-outs? Patrols? Yeah, that one guy had said patrols, right? “-patrols any time soon. I hardly know the first thing about how to act here” Not a lie, but he’s sure she’ll take that differently than how he meant, “let alone knowing how to shoot a gun.”

 

“Well, I’ll say,” She laughed, “You have the worst score on the shooting-range test that I have ever seen, no offense, but I have no idea how you actually passed with rates like that one.”

 

Izuku didn’t know why, but he felt a bit insulted despite it not being about him. He could probably shoot a gun just fine, thank you very much. “That’s a bit harsh,” he grumbled as she took his arm and pulled him up the steps to the precinct.

 

“So, I’m Officer Kobayashi, I’m pretty sure you’re gonna pair up with me if you’re deemed good to go, but I’d have to check the systems to make sure.” She smiled before guiding him to the front desk. Izuku was kind of surprised at how different she was acting when she was talking to the other officer and him. He’ll have to keep an eye on that. Waving her hand to the man at the desk, she grinned, “This here is Abe-san, ask him anything and he will get it for ya’.”

 

The man only ignored her, continuing to stare straight ahead like he had been doing when the two had entered the room.

 

Kobayashi just narrowed her eyes at him as she held her hand up to her face, doing a too-loud stage-whisper to talk to Izuku, “He loves people, he’s just permanently tired. Don’t mind Abe.” She dropped her hand and grinned back at the receptionist, “Alright, well. I found the newbie! Hand us the forms and we’ll stop annoying ya!”

 

Izuku added a “Please,” just so it didn’t sound like they were demanding it. Kobayashi just waved her hand at him as if to say it wasn’t needed.

 

Abe looked away from the spot on the wall to click around on his computer, bringing up a few tabs that were in Izuku’s-line-of-sight. Pushing his chair away from the desk, Abe unlocked a drawer that had sat under the tabletop to pull out two separate sheets of paper, sliding them over to Izuku as the man looked from the screen to Izuku’s face.

 

“Are you really twenty-one?” he asked.

 

Hoping to successfully hide his panic, Izuku nodded, “Hah yeah, why? Do I look really young or something?”

 

Kobayashi snorted as she leaned on the tabletop to read the screen, “Yup, I didn’t want to say it, but you look twelve.”

 

Izuku couldn’t help but scoff. He is fourteen, thank you very much!

 

Just as Izuku went to take a look at the papers to make sure he knew what he was signing, he caught sight of the ID photo on Abe’s screen. Holy heck Izuku is lucky. Officer Mikumo looks practically exactly like him if he just dyed his hair purple and let it grow out a bit. No wonder why Kobayashi took him in without even questioning it.

 

Now he just had to hope the real Mikumo didn’t show up today, Izuku would immediately get swarmed by police seeing as he was literally in their home-base. Apparently, impersonation of a police officer is a really big crime or something. He’ll just hope he stays lucky.

 

Taking the pen that was handed to him, he started to fully read the papers in front of him. He didn’t want to sign something that said they were legally permitted to search his place or something; Izuku doubts his mom would be very happy with that.

 

“Huh” Kobayashi smirked, still laying half-sprawled out on the receptionist's desk, “Y’know, out of all the officers I’ve seen come and go in here, I don’t think one of them had stopped to literally read the papers.”

 

Abe looked at her in disgust, “You are supposed to read the terms and conditions- You’re a cop Kobayashi, you literally throw people in jail for not abiding by the terms and conditions.”

 

Izuku just tried his best to not pay attention to their bickering as he continued to read. From the gist of it, one of the sheets was just saying that this is where he will be working and he is who he says he is, and the other seemed to be a sheet that needed to be sent in in order to get all of the gear he’d need as an actual police officer. Weirdly enough, reading that made him tear up rather quickly.

 

“Ey woah, you good there Newbie?” Kobayashi asked as she straightened up suddenly.

 

He isn’t even a real cop- he hasn’t worked for this or anything -but the feeling of actually signing something that acknowledges him as someone who deserves it-

 

“-Ah yeah! Sorry” He wiped his eyes, smiling widely as he took the cap off the pen with his trembling hand, “It just doesn’t feel real, you know? I feel like I've hardly done anything and I’m already here.”

 

Wow, imagine that.

 

Imagine being such a liar that you make yourself cry from joy just because of the imaginary life you had just started.

 

Pathetic.

 

Abe awkwardly looked away and rubbed his chin as Kobayashi’s grin softened, deciding to give him some privacy by going back to annoying the receptionist.

 

Izuku set the pen on the paper and signed his name.

 

Mikumo Akatani

 

Entry #1

Name: Kobayashi Hide

Age: 34

Height: 4’11” or 149cm

Quirk: Mind Stump

Description: Just by skin contact, she can control a person’s thoughts. She is unable to read or hear them, but she can feel the energy of it (how fast they’re thinking) and she can put a stop to it.

Strengths: Calming down people at crime scenes enough to give a proper run-down of what happened. Getting the criminal confused on a raid as they try to get away. Getting people out of their heads during anxiety/panic attacks. Her arms; those things are buff.

Weaknesses: Reaching anything, missing anything she aims for (I watched her miss a trash can shot from a foot away)

Threats: Personality changes from person to person, I can’t let my guard down near her in case of something switching. She acknowledged that I look young, so she might figure out that she isn’t actually too far off. (Threat status out of ten: 4/10, not that high of a rank, I might be able to outsmart her if she ever figured it out)

Personality: (as stated above) This seems to change from who she is talking to. To the officer upfront, she seemed snappish and sarcastic, but to me, she seemed bubbly and teasing, and to Abe, she was flirty and talkative. (I’ll add to this once I receive more information, check back later)

Appearance: No obvious mutations, she has medium skin with straightened black hair that is set in a middle part and reaches just above her shoulders. From her arms alone, she looks like she could probably break me in half if she pleased. When she grins, you can see that her top-two canine-teeth stick out at odd angles and the stains on her teeth suggest that she used to have braces. Her eyes are black-brown and her eyebrows seem to be heavily plucked. She has a mole under her right eye. She doesn’t seem to actually care so much about the uniform (if there is one) and is instead wearing a tight black top that has sleeves reaching just above her elbow, a thick looking vest that may or may not be bullet-proof and some tan flowy pants that cut off just at her shoes. Speaking of which, her shoes look practically brand-new, tight black boots that might actually just be socks at second glance. She isn’t wearing much else besides a thick gold watch at her wrist and two different wedding bands on her finger.

Notes:

“-Ah yeah! Sorry” He wiped his eyes, smiling widely as he took the cap off the pen with his trembling hand, “It just doesn’t feel real, you know? I feel like I've hardly done anything and I’m already here.” ,,huh,, I wonder why,,

Izuku: "Oh, hey cool! I can just lie my way through this job! It's not like I'm a real police officer or anything, it's all lies, really. Who would believe any of that?"
Also Izuku: "I worked so hard to get here and I'm so proud of myself" sniffles "It feels like I don't deserve it"