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@ditzybat

ditzy, she/her, 16 just a silly lil dude who’s brain is rotting with dc headcanons and incorrect quotes

Stop acting like Talia hates Ra’s or that Ra’s doesn’t care about Talia. Their relationship is EXTREMELY complex and they both love each other.

Ra’s is the definition of a loving but cold father because he thinks it’s what benefits his child. He’s equivalent to the parent who throws their child into too many extra curricular activities and pushes them for good grades and perfection because he wants them to have a good future. It’s not right, yes, but it’s human. It’s just exaggerated because of the nature of comics.

Talia has worked against her father multiple times, and ideally would stay doing so, but she still understands her father’s perspective and why he does what he does. She agrees with his cause, she doesn’t agree with his methods. And despite that, she still comes back when he’s in danger because she loves him. Talia was able to resist her sister’s brainwashing when she was ordered to kill him because of her love and loyalty to him.

Talia knows her father’s not a good man, but she can’t help but love him because it really wasn’t all bad (early Ra’s was very much a single girl dad trying to make his princess happy by setting up dates with the weird bat freak she’s into) and she understands why he is how he is and she knows he loves her. Their relationship isn’t healthy, but it is loving and that’s an extremely important aspect, because without that love, Talia would be a completely different person and Ra’s would have little interest in Bruce in the first place.

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Had a thought about Mexican Jason Todd while setting up my family’s Ofrenda with my mom this year. So basically, it’s agreed that Jason died at the end of April, and was resurrected 6 months later at the end of October (and in this HC the VERY beginning of November). So what if, every year after his mom died, Jason would set up his Ofrenda with Bruce. Honoring Catherine, even Martha and Thomas along with other deceased loved ones like John and Mary Grayson for Dick. And after Jason’s death, Bruce pulls himself together to put his son on the family Ofrenda. His Pan de Muertos not as nice as Jason’s family recipe, the Cempazuchitl is arranged around the alter, but not as aesthetically appealing as the way Jason would arrange it, and the candles not quite the correct brand that they would normally pick up from Crime Alley. But it’s personal, and sweet, and he knows that in spirit Jason would join him along with other loved ones. However, what if, on midnight of November 1, when the veil between the living and the dead is weakest, Jason crawls out of his coffin disoriented and confused as to how, exactly, he’s alive.

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Reporter: President Luthor, can you elaborate on your aforementioned policies on illegal aliens?

Luthor: Of course, we must close Earths borders from those extraterrestrial ‘heroes’ such as Superman and Martian Manhunter. I highly doubt they have a green card to enter the United States, let alone a social security to any Earth country.

Reporter: … Are… your immigration policies focused on… actual aliens?

Luthor: Yes? What else would I be talking about?

Reporter: … not the weirdest thing I’ve heard on the job surprisingly…

dis you?

Yes! I posted this on my personal TikTok account, showing off my crazy ex-boyfriend who somehow found my ao3 after i blocked him on litterally every platform I could think of. 😭

I’ll say it once, and I’ll say it again - Fanon Tim Drake is just Canon Barbara Gordon, and the only reason she’s not as well loved or well characterized as Tim in fandom spaces is because she’s a woman.

So canon babra Gordon is a coffe adict who wants to kiss all her friends and is a crazy conspiracy theorist who runs a company on 1 minute of sleep suicidal thoughts and Roch kid engery?

Cause that's those are the traits fanon Tim has and none of them applie to babra.

Or do you just mean because Tim is more computery then his brothers in fanon? Cause I feel like makeing that comparison is MORE reductive then just actually takeing about how babra Gordon leads a super hero team, a famliy of superheros, and assists the world's largest superhero team all at once, all while kicking ass both in the hacking world and real world, all while haveing a disability that she dosent let hold her back from being awsome.

I have to disagree with you. I don't think that OP meant that Babs was a one to one carbon copy of fanon Tim Drake, I think that they were mostly just pointing out that there are major similarities.

First of all, Babs does, frequently seem like she wants to make out with all of her friends (cough dinah cough).

Further, in your post you say that Babs is leading multiple super hero teams and you think that she isn't running on thirty seconds of sleep, coffee and spite??

Also she canonically deals with mental health issues and depressive thoughts, particularly in the aftermath of the Killing Joke.

I think that making the assumption that Babs canon persona must include her juggling everything and kicking ass while she does it isn't a productive way to explore her characterisation. It is way more interesting to see her struggle and have the intensity of her job way her down (one instance of this is when Dick finds her after Cataclysm and we're able to see the strong facade she's put up for the gothamites she's leading crack).

So, yeah, I do think that Barbara Gordon is in a lot of ways fanon Tim Drake, and thought that I'd just back up OP on their point :)

What I think each batfam member would dress up as for Halloween - specifically in the context of a Halloween themed Wayne Gala - because I’m bored:

Bruce & Selina: they dress up as Batman and Catwoman, with Bruce (Brucie in this context) being Catwoman and Selina being Batman. The kids have the image of Bruce squeezed into latex burned in their corneas and they make an effort to not be in the same vicinity as him, lest they die from cringe or second hand embarrassment.

Dick: He’s shamelessly one of those really colorful South American blue parrots, he spends the night doing tricks and soaring through the air (think the Carnival costumes from Rio) and ends up breaking a punch table when he falls straight on his ass from seeing the horror that is Bruce in leather - he immediately gets covered in a shock blanket courtesy of Alfred.

Barbara: Decides to dress up as the kid from E.T with Haley dressed up as E.T in a basket modification she made to her chair. She runs over peoples toes by ‘accident’ throughout the night in aid (aka annoying them until they donate at least 1K) to push people into donating for whatever the charity of the night is.

Jason: doesn’t like celebrating Halloween, but somehow gets roped into dressing up as Jason Vorhees - the irony is not lost on him and finds it hilarious. He lurks in the corners of the ballroom to scare the rich snobs into paying into whatever charity is being funded that night by showing off a suspiciously red, very real, machete.

Tim: Couples costume with Bernard. Tim is Spock and Bernard is Kirk. Tim tries his hardest to stay in character the whole night, ends up freaking people out from the lack of expression and uncanny valley statue like demeanor on his face compared to his energetic boyfriend.

Damian: He and Nika dress up as Gomez and Morticia Adams. They’re very touchy the whole night like the teenagers they are. They salsa dance and become just as eccentric as the characters they’re playing that somehow at the end of the night they end up making headlines for nearly spending the night in jail for suspected ‘murder’ (they Carrie’d Bruce with real blood from questionable sources)

Steph & Cass: Matching costumes. Steph is Emily from the Corpse Bride and Cass is Victor. The special effects makeup is so realistic that it makes Tim break his Spock character and shriek/jump 3 feet into the air when they sneak behind him.

Duke: Dresses up in a Riddler costume and makes up bad riddles just to rub it into the Riddler’s face that he’s a lame old guy telling shitty googled riddles (Revenge for something that happened earlier in the week, not that anyone knows he’s signal, but a burn from a child of a celebrity hurts just as bad from one of a hero) - The Riddler ends up crashing the party seconds before Commissioner Gordon tries to take Damian and Nika in for questioning of where exactly all that very real blood they used came from.

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How does Jason not have body dysmorphia? I mean, when he died he was a 4’6 and barely 100 pounds, and then the Lazarus pit gave him a crazy transformation of an added 18 inches of height and additional 130-ish pounds. Like how does he not feel like a stranger in his own skin? I was just thinking earlier how Jason really would relate to Metamorphosis by Franz Kafta with the way that he probably didn’t recognize himself in the mirror after waking up from the pits, along with the onslaught of negative emotions flooding his head - feeling like a monster just like Gregor Samsa had - anyway this has been stuck in my head and needed to get out.

“How did Bruce not know he was the Red Hood” the average height for EIGHT year olds is 4’6. When you see an 8 year old, chances are they’re the same height Jason was when he died. Why would Bruce see a 6 foot mafia boss and think “wow that’s my son who died he must have been revived and grown a foot and a half”

Bart Allen types at a speed so fast Tim had to get Waynetech to make him a phone that can keep up with him, because he broke the last three phones he had by overloading them with typing much too fast for them to handle. He’s from the future, he didn’t expect today’s technology to be quite so fragile. The young justice groupchat looks something like:

-39492949 year old: GYSS YOKM RBCE BIEV WAHAF BAOPENED GO ME FK DAY J LOTERLALY WA FIBJFING GHIS GUG ANF LIKE HE WSS ?? YAKKJNG ABOJR SIM BE SAKD HE KNE U??

Red nuisance: ?? Are you talking to me?

Cassieeee: okay i don't even know what he's saying sorry

Knock off steel man (aluminum man?): Yeah no what the fuck?

This (to a lesser extent) extends to all the speedsters. As soon as this phone was developed, both Wally and Barry were gifted one by their respective Bat.

Barry now texts Hal faster than people can see during league meetings, making him try not to laugh every time his phone screen lights up.

Wally quotes memes the exact second they become popular, because of course these phones are capable of playing any video at 100x speed without distortion. It makes people think he’s brain rotted. He leans into it because it means people underestimate him. It pisses Dick off though, because he has to explain to people that yes, Wally still trains as much as the rest of him, no, he’s not slacking to watch TikTok, he’s just scrolled through the entire for you page in about a half minute.

Everything is the same AU except - Tim is a ‘psychic’, but in actuality he’s just been amazing at picking up patterns from a young age, it was a useful tool for the few times his parents brought him to their archeology digs and one of the few things Jack and Janet acknowledged and praised him for. Imagine Tim realizing that Jason isn’t actually dead - how you may ask? He visits his grave just to talk sometimes and notices disturbances in the soil and takes initiative to dig up Jason’s grave - he runs to Bruce who thinks Tim is a little unnerved stalker freak for digging up his sons grave… but, Tim claims to be psychic to get out of seeming like a creep desecrating a dead child’s grave for no reason. And in the midst of Bruce’s grief the man never fact checks Tim on this lie, so everything happens the same as in canon except Tim has to bullshit his way through investigations and major life events.

you mean it’s a Psych au. That is unironically the plot to psych the tv show, honestly Tim as Shawn is a HILARIOUS and amazing idea I approve 👍

It’s one of the first tags actually! I was recently rewatching psych and thought how hilarious it would be if Tim BS’d his way into becoming the bats ‘psychic consultant’! Bernard would totally be the Gus to his Shawn just for the sake of helping him maintain his ‘psychic’ cover!

Everything is the same AU except - Tim is a ‘psychic’, but in actuality he’s just been amazing at picking up patterns from a young age, it was a useful tool for the few times his parents brought him to their archeology digs and one of the few things Jack and Janet acknowledged and praised him for. Imagine Tim realizing that Jason isn’t actually dead - how you may ask? He visits his grave just to talk sometimes and notices disturbances in the soil and takes initiative to dig up Jason’s grave - he runs to Bruce who thinks Tim is a little unnerved stalker freak for digging up his sons grave… but, Tim claims to be psychic to get out of seeming like a creep desecrating a dead child’s grave for no reason. And in the midst of Bruce’s grief the man never fact checks Tim on this lie, so everything happens the same as in canon except Tim has to bullshit his way through investigations and major life events.

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Fanon Tim, a mysterious super smart hacker bro on the same level of Oracle, who’s also unhinged, caffeine dependent, morally grey, negative rizz, lowkey has the highest body count of all the bats, and is a badass: and I will watch the crimson blood, leak from you neck

Canon Tim, loser skater boy who plays DnD in his spare time, nap addicted, pulls hella bitches, strict moral code with the bad habit of seeing only black and white, and is also a major badass: woah, that kid is hardcore goth