Zbornik radova Vizantolo{kog instituta H, 2008

Recueil des travaux de lInstitut detudes byzantines XV, 2008

DOI:10.2298/ZRVI0845043M
UDC:821.14'0213"04"

^ELICA MILOVANOVI] (Millersville, Pennsylvania)

GREGORY OF NAZIANZUSS DE REBUS SUIS1

AND THE TRADITION OF EPIC DIDACTIC POETRY
Gregorys poem De rebus suis (Carm. 2.1.1) is examined in this article from
the point of view both of its content and of its literary and stylistic features. In con-
tent, the poem is personal and reflexive, and its central theme appears to be a crisis
of faith that its author had experienced in his later years. In form, it has all the char-
acteristics of the epic didactic genre: it is metaphrastic in nature (i.e., it turns prose
material into verse form); it is written in the archaizing epic language; it makes use
of the modified Homeric simile (the so-called multiple correspondence simile); and
it carefully avoids the use of specific liturgical terms and expressions, replacing
them instead with various poetic paraphrases. The overall conceptual simplicity of
the poem is generic too, and it may have been modeled on the earliest known repre-
sentative of the genre, Hesiods Works and Days.

A great deal of poetry written by Gregory the Theologian, also known as

Gregory of Nazianzus (ca 330390), can be classified as didactic: he himself, after
all, claimed that his poetic efforts were directed, at least partly, at the instruction
of the young.2 On the other hand, his rather voluminous poetic output some
19,000 lines is by no means uniform in either content, length, metrical shape, or
the poetic quality of individual pieces. Equally uneven is the amount of attention
that individual poems have received in modern scholarship. Some of the poems
have been studied extensively because they offer a considerable amount of auto-
biographical information; some, on the other hand, have attracted attention on ac-
count of their theological and doctrinal contents. However, the generic status and
affiliation of the majority of poems has often been either overlooked or studied in-
conclusively. The poems may be considered didactic in general, but their specific

1 De rebus suis (Concerning his own affairs) is a traditional modern title for Gregorys
Carmen 2 (Liber II), 1 (Sectio I, De seipso), 1. Text in Migne, PG 37, coll. 9691017. English transla-
tion by D. M. Meehan, Saint Gregory of Nazianzus: Three Poems, Washington, D. C., 1987, 2545.
2 See ^elica Milovanovi}, Gregory of Nazianzus: Ars Poetica. In suos versus, Carmen 2, 1,
39, Journal of Early Christian Studies 5 (1997) 497510.
44 ^elica Milovanovi}

place within the ample tradition of ancient didactic poetry deserves to be exam-
ined more carefully than has been the case so far.3
Although the very notion of genre may raise some eyebrows among contem-
porary literary critics, in classical studies it is not considered old-fashioned or ob-
solete. Classicists by and large still believe that literary genres have a definite and
significant presence in ancient literature, and that they function within texts as a
way of reducing complexity and thereby not only enriching, but even enabling lit-
erary communication.4 Thus, as another scholar put it, by understanding what it
is that sets a particular body of texts apart as a specific genre, we are able to appre-
ciate better the qualities of the individual texts, and especially in the case of a
comparatively neglected type of literature such as didactic poetry, attention to ge-
neric characteristics can contribute in important ways to our interpretation of oth-
erwise well-studied works.5 In other words, if we are to understand a work prop-
erly, and be able to evaluate its literary qualities fairly, we must be alert to the
presence of typical generic characteristics in it.
Gregorys poem De rebus suis is a case in point. Being one of the major au-
tobiographical poems it has been studied and quoted often enough, but never
placed in its proper generic context, which, in turn, has led to some misunder-
standings concerning its true nature and inherent qualities.6 Therefore, I wish to
point out the specific elements that make this poem a didactic epic, in the hope of
demonstrating that Gregory was well aware of the requirements, as well as the his-
torical development of the genre from Hesiod, Parmenides and Empedocles in the
beginning, down to the various Cynegetica and Halieutica of his own day.
In modern scholarship, however, the history and theory of didactic epic has
come into focus only within the last fifteen years, or so. A thorough and compre-

3 For a recent attempt to place Gregorys autobiographical poems within the tradition of di-
dactic iambics see A. Cameron, Poetry and Literary Culture in Late Antiquity, edd. S. Swain- M. Ed-
wards, Approaching Late Antiquity. The Transformation from Early to Late Empire, Oxford and New
York, 2004, 327354. However, although Gregorys Carm.2,1,1 De rebus suis is autobiographical in
content, it is written in hexameters and therefore belongs to a different sub-genre of didactic poetry.
4 G. B. Conte G. W. Most, Genre, edd. S. Hornblower A. Spawforth, The Oxford Classical
Dictionary 3d ed., Oxford and New York 1996, 631.
5 K. Volk, The Poetics of Latin Didactic. Lucretius, Vergil, Ovid, Manilius, Oxford and New
York, 2002, vii. Ironically, ancient literary critics did not recognize until rather late that didactic epic
was a separate genre, distinct from the heroic epic.
6 For example, R. Keydell, Die Literarhistorische Stellung der Gedichte Gregors von Nazianz,
Atti dello VIII Congresso Internazionale di Studi Byzantini I, Roma 1953, 134143, while recogniz-
ing the poetic inspiration and inherent quality of this poem, maintains that the poem represents for-
mally a hymn to Christ, broken in two by some additional material inserted in the middle, which is
an indication that Gregory had to invent a form for this confessional autobiography (141). But as we
will try to demonstrate here, Gregory did not seek to invent a new form for this poem; rather, he was
actually following a time-honored model. Similarly, another scholar, A. Casanova, Gregory of
Nazianzus, De rebus suis 424 ff. and De vita sua 68ff.: Echoes of Epic and Dramatic Poetry in his
Mothers Prayer, edd. P. Allen- W. Mayer- L. Cross, Prayer and Spirituality in the Early Church, vol.
2, Brisbane 1999, 145153, assumes that the model for at least some parts of the poem was Homers
Iliad which cannot be right since Gregory did not set out to write a heroic, but rather didactic epic,
with its own, well-known (at the time) set of rules.
 Gregory of Nazianzuss De rebus suis 45

hensive survey can be found in Peter Tooheys Epic Lessons.7 Although meant for
the curious general reader the book offers an insightful description of the main
characteristics of the genre, as well as a literary-historical analysis of some twenty-
-five major didactic poems spanning the period between the eighth century B.C.
(Hesiod) and the fifth century A.D. (Prudentius). According to Toohey, ancient Greek
and Roman didactic poems usually share most, or all, of the following features:
An explicit desire to instruct, in a single voice (that of the teacher), a
specific addressee (the presumed student); in practice, the specific ad-
dressee can be substituted by the general you that is, whoever hap-
pens to be reading the poem;
A serious tone and, in spite of the technical subject matter (from science,
philosophy, religion, agriculture, or various leisure activities), a pro-
nounced interest in moral teaching;
Epic hexameter as a meter of choice; use of some of the formulaic tech-
niques of the oral heroic epic, as well as the pretense of poetic simultane-
ity (the illusion that the poem is being created in performance, before our
own eyes, so to say); an emphasis on textual variety and dramatic tonal
oscillations;
So-called calculated intrusions, that is, vivid narrative or descriptive ep-
isodes loosely connected to the main theme, whose material often comes
from mythology; in the absence of plot and narrative unity, these episodes
help to heighten the emotional impact of the whole;
Conceptual simplicity, as one of the core requirements; an overall
paratactic composition; a moderate length, usually around 800 lines (but
could be anywhere between 500 and 1000 lines);
A metaphrastic nature most didactic poems represent a secondary,
poetic version of an originally prose work on a technical subject.

Turning to our poem, we will first review its contents, and then consider
how it handles the specific requirements of the genre. The poem begins with an
opening invocation and prayer to Christ the Lord: since His helpful hand has man-
ifested itself already many times in history, the present suppliant, who finds him-
self in great distress, is also hoping for a quick and efficient help from above
(lines 136).8 After that follows a statement of the main theme:

7 P. Toohey, Epic Lessons. An introduction to ancient didactic poetry, London and New York
1996.
8 In the opinion of A. Casanova (see n. 6 above) this prayer is composed according to the an-
cient Greek, more specifically Homeric, formula (such as the prayer of Chryses in Book 1 of the Il-
iad). I do not see enough evidence to support that opinion, but I find it significant that this type of
prayer /invocation, which begins with a listing of Gods former interventions in human history, is well
attested not only in early Christian prayers, but also in 4th century liturgical practice, e.g. in the Lit-
urgy of St. Basil (the two long prayers read silently by the priest during the anaphora). Other examples
of this type of prayer in Gregory are discussed by K. Demoen, The Paradigmatic Prayer in Gregory
Nazianzen, ed. E. A. Livingstone, Studia Patristica vol. XXXII (Papers presented at the Twelfth Inter-
national Conference on Patristic Studies held in Oxford 1995), Leuven 1997, 96101.
46 ^elica Milovanovi}

Among mortals two gates towards hateful death are open.9

The concept of the two gates (one good, the other evil), and the paths that
lead to them, is explained as follows: towards the evil gate of doom are headed all
those who act presumptuously, who care too much for their bodies, eat more than
necessary, enjoy plotting hateful intrigues, and commit serious transgressions; to-
wards the good gate, on the other hand, are headed in the hope of reaching life
eternal all those who behold God with the pure eye of the mind, who hate
pride, pay little attention to the body, reducing their flesh to a mere shadow, and
who tread lightly upon the Earth, the true mystics of the hidden life of Christ the
King. However how unfortunate! in spite of all their efforts, these good peo-
ple, walking along the good path and toward the good gate, cannot ever be sure of
attaining their goal, for
The raging demon, the contriver of evil, devises from without a thousand
stings of doom. Alas for mortals in their misery (lines 5153).
This is the simple scaffolding around which the whole poem is built. This
world offers good and bad choices alike, but to those who choose to pursue the
good, success is not guaranteed; for, all along the way these people suffer, some-
times even succumb, under the attacks of a vengeful creature known as the devil.
This general idea is illustrated throughout by the authors personal example. Greg-
ory, as he states repeatedly, from his youth on has always strived towards the good
gate, but the contriver of evil has not given him respite, dragging him forcefully
away from the good path of holiness, to the dangerous path of wickedness.
The next section describes in detail the kind of person Gregory has always
been: he did not care for marriage, silk robes, good food, great house and lavish
entertaining, possessions in land and slaves, influence in the wider world; his only
frivolous ambition had been to excel in letters, but even that ambition he has aban-
doned and laid prostrate before the feet of Christ. Instead of pursuing a literary
career he has accepted the burden of caring for his aged parents. However, the
good deed has turned into something quite opposite; the good parents have been
taken care of, true, but Gregory himself has been greatly beset by responsibilities
and anxieties of an active public life (lines 63164).
Another blow has brought even more trouble, distress and unhappiness to
his life: the death of his brother Caesarius. Caesarius had been a brilliant young
man, a rising star at the imperial court in Constantinople and a great champion and
protector of Gregory himself. His premature death had forced Gregory to assume
even more responsibilities in the world and prevented him from pursuing his spiri-
tual ideal. That ideal was firmly planted in his soul thanks to an illuminating mys-
tical experience he had had once in his youth:
Long ago I tore my spirit from the world and mingled it with the shining
spirits of heaven. The lofty mind bore me far from the flesh, set me in that

9 Line 37, tr. Meehan. Henceforward, all quotes from De rebus suis will be in Meehans trans-
lation.
 Gregory of Nazianzuss De rebus suis 47

place, and hid me in the recesses of the heavenly abode. There the light of
the Trinity shone upon my eyes, a light than which I have known nothing
brighter. It is throned on high and gives off an ineffable and harmonious ra-
diance, which is the principle of all those things that time shuts off from
heaven. I died to the world and the world to me (lines 194202).
This section, full of apparently genuine emotion, culminates in a revelation:
no matter how dear his brother had been to him, says Gregory, it is not so much
the death of the brother, as the dreaded loss of his own soul that he now deplores.
It is my soul that I lament, as one would mourn a queen, fair, and stately,
and sprung from a noble line of kings, that he might see languishing, fast in
chains, when enemies have taken her with the spear. They have bound her in
harsh slavery, and she bends her sad gaze upon the ground. For such was my
fate. In such wise am I stricken to the heart (lines 230234).10
Next, returning briefly to the theme of the two doors (paths) and the two
kinds of people traveling towards them, Gregory goes on to explain why, and to
whom, he is making this confession. His actual reason for speaking up, as he puts
it, is so that whoever sees my plight should tremble and improve his own life
(line 351). And if we should wonder who the whoever may be, that is, which
audience exactly he is trying to reach, Gregory gives the following explanation:
his words are meant for those who are united with himself in love and suffering,
who yearn for the cross, love the path of rectitude and have compassion for the
fallen. Then he adds, in a tone of defiance mixed with sadness:
As for me, I shall not give over my laments until I make good my escape
from lamentable evil, and place a padlock on the mad passions of the mind.
Satan, the evil one, has thrown open all the doors to them, doors that were
fast before, when I was sheltered by the hand of God. In those days evil
could not approach me, but it is swift to gain hold now (lines 253259).
Again, he goes over some of the same ground: he wishes he had fled the
world, that is, become a monk, and devoted his whole life to Christ. But he had to
take care of his parents for whom he had a deep affection, and whose favorite
child he had been. He recounts the spiritual zeal and eagerness of his youth, and
remembers how once but not any more the splendor of Gods lofty throne
was blinding his vision. He is unable to say whether he will ever go back to his
former ways, although he is greatly thirsting for the light, now that he has come to
the evening of his life. Again he states that he has never been in such trouble, not
even when he survived a raging storm at sea, on his way from Alexandria to Ath-
ens; or when he lived through an earthquake in Greece; or when he almost died

10 This striking image has no parallel in Homer. The one possible source of this similes im-
agery that I can think of could be Heliodoruss Ethiopian Story. In the opening scene of that novel we
find a beautiful, tall young woman, who had apparently been captured by pirates, mourning the pre-
sumed death of her lover. See J. P. Morgan, trans., An Ethiopian Story, ed. B. P. Reardon, Collected
Ancient Greek Novels, Berkeley, Los Angeles and London 1989, 349 sqq.
48 ^elica Milovanovi}

from some pulmonary illness; or when he injured his eye and became impure be-
cause of the injury and unable to perform the liturgical services; none of those, he
says, were as troublesome as the present turmoil in his soul. In spite of all, how-
ever, he still hopes to be able to return to the holy land of pure and simple faith,
and he begs Christ, who is benign to all the humble, but crushes the proud, to
have pity on him (lines 261366).
Next come three so-called calculated intrusions, or narrative episodes, to
further illustrate Gregorys troubles. Two of these stories come from the Bible,
while the third is clearly a family story that he had often heard from his mother.
First, the story of the Good Samaritan Luke 10, 3037 is presented in the form of
an extended simile: as when the man was going down from Jerusalem the mis-
fortunes I encountered were like that too. Gregory draws numerous points of
comparison between himself and the man who had been attacked by robbers: the
robber (=the devil) attacked him when he traveled from the noble city and its way
of life (= his own youthful and worshipful self? Or, perhaps, the city of Constanti-
nople?); he stripped him of his clothes (=the grace of Christ), and left him naked
as Adam (= expelled from Eden); the priests (=the bishops at the council in Con-
stantinople?) abandoned him when they saw that he was in trouble; he is begging
Christ to save him and lead him to that all-hospitable place of rest (=the inn from
the story) whence he can be restored once more to the holy city of faith (lines
367392).11
Second is the story of the publican and Pharisee Luke 18, 1014. Having
told the story in some detail, Gregory, who identifies himself as the publican,
prays to Christ to save him, if not for his own sake for he himself had never ac-
complished anything to deserve it then for the sake of his excellent parents
(lines 393423).
The third story is told with considerable emotion and is full of biblical refer-
ences. His dear mother, called alternately the holy Anna, or Sarah, had prayed for
a male child, promising to dedicate him to Christ. Her prayer had been granted and
she was even given the name of the child in a dream. The child Gregory was
dedicated as a new Samuel and he grew up amid expectations that he would be-
come a priest; his own father, a new Abraham, would lead him to the altar as a
sacred, living victim unto God and an illustrious Isaac; this, in his mothers
words, would be the most noble inheritance he could ever receive in this world,
and in the world to come which is by far the best. Gregory, yielding to his

11 Although Gregory himself presents the story as a spiritual allegory, it is nevertheless tempt-
ing to read in it a veiled reference to his withdrawal from the Council of Constantinople in 381. In par-
ticular the statement about the priests who abandoned him (line 387) reminds us of Gregorys often
discussed bitterness and resentment against his fellow bishops. If this interpretation is correct, it would
help date the poem to the last years of Gregorys life. That goes against the accepted opinion that De
rebus suis was written in the year 371; see J. Bernardi, Trois autobiographies de Saint Gregoire de
Nazianze, edd. M.-F. Baslez, P. Hoffmann, L. Pernot, Linvention de lautobiographie d Hesiode a
Saint Augustin, Paris 1993, 155165. I believe this poem was written at roughly the same time, but
slightly before De vita sua (Carm. 2.1.11).
 Gregory of Nazianzuss De rebus suis 49

mothers desire, since earliest childhood was devoted to Christ who, in turn, in a
wonderfully straightforward manner used to converse with his servant, and in
those conversations commanded that he live in holy chastity.12
Ending his recollections, Gregory brings up once again the theme of the two
paths and the narrow gate at the end of the good path. Unfortunately, says he, the
ways of the good and the evil are adjacent, and it is very difficult to stay on the right
path. His own career illustrates that. When he was a child he traveled the royal
road towards the seat that shines on high, but now that he is drawing to the close of
his life he finds himself tottering, as on drunken feet, along a crooked path, being
weighed down by the incessant struggle with the demon (lines 424493).
But the battle has not been lost yet. Gregory has come to realize who he is
and to what station he wishes to raise himself, and he is determined to fight the en-
emy to the end. After some more general considerations about the ways of the
good and the wicked in this world, and the warning that we should all be afraid of
that great eye which sees beneath the earth, penetrates the immense depths of the
ocean, and whatsoever the mind of man conceals (lines 518520), he introduces
an elaborate poetic simile. In it he compares himself to a mighty tree almost de-
stroyed by the torrents of a river in flood, a wretched trunk, borne among the
rocks, where it rots under the constant wear of flood and flotsam. That leads to a
passionate plea to Christ not to abandon him and to allow him once again to enter-
tain the hope of heaven. Human life is full of ups and downs whose purpose we
are unable to understand, but which must all be for the best since they are part of
Gods plan. Then, in a series of references to biblical miracles Gregory begs to be
freed from the various ills that beset him (lines 529595).
Given the all-allusive nature of Gregorys poetry in general,13 the miracles
he is praying for might offer some clues concerning his own circumstances at the
time. He starts by begging for the assistance of the poor man Lazarus so that he,
being rich in suffering, might not end up expelled from the ample bosom of
Abraham Lk.16, 1931; then in a quick succession of biblical allusions he prays
to be delivered form the issue of blood Mk.5, 2529, from the legion of dev-
ils Mk.5, 213, from leprosy Matt.8, 14, and from loss of eyesight and hear-
ing Mar.8,2226; Mat. 11,5; 15, 30; he pointedly prays to Christ to make his
withered hand stretch out, loose the knot of his tongue, make firm the tottering
gait of the feetgive life to the paralyzed limbs, raise to life the rotting corpse.
This last sequence in particular, referring to various sections from the Gospels of
Luke and Matthew Lk. 6,611; 1,64; Matt.11,5, could also be an allusion to a
real ailment that Gregory was suffering from at that time of his life.
The poem ends as it begins, with a formal invocation to Christ. In it Gregory
addresses Christ with a long list of biblical titles and pronounces his ultimate ar-

12 In another poem, Carm. 2, 1, 45, PG 37, coll. 1370 sqq., Gregory tells in detail of the vision
of Purity and Chastity that he had received in a dream, sometime in his youth.
13 For Gregory's poetic style as unremittingly allusive see D. A. Sykes, The Poemata Ar-
cana of St. Gregory Nazianzen. Some Literary Questions, BZ 72 (1979) 13.
50 ^elica Milovanovi}

dent wish: As the years run their course, grant that I may here and hereafter be
mingled with the whole divinity, with hymns unending may I celebrate Thee in
joy (lines 622634).
In spite of the fact that the poem is long and often repetitive, the underlying
leitmotif can be heard clearly: Gregory sees himself on the brink of a spiritual fall,
in a state of religious torpor, and unable to reestablish the lines of communication
with the divine that he knew from his youth. Nevertheless, he prays fervently for
healing and salvation, and hopes, expects even, to be reinstated in the grace of
Christ, his beloved Lord.
The next question to consider is how De rebus suis relates overall to the
genre of didactic epic. The short answer would be it fills the bill completely.
The poem consists of 634 hexameter lines, written in a pointedly Homeric lan-
guage interspersed throughout though it may be with words from later
sources.14 Among the figures of style, extended simile is the one used most fre-
quently.15 Another remarkable figure is a direct address to a person/hero long
since dead, as when Gregory addresses his brother with: Poor Caesarius now
that you are dead, youve become the prey of jackals, etc. (lines 177184). The
illusion of simultaneity, indicating that the poem is being developed as we listen
to it, is reinforced by expressions such as what the morrow will bring, I do not
know (line 297), or I do not clearly understand what is hidden in this simili-
tude (line 378). The three calculated intrusions, that is the narrative episodes
inserted conspicuously in the center of the poem, add liveliness and immediacy to
the discourse.
The question of the addressee, that is, the person for whose benefit the moral
and spiritual instruction is offered, is of special interest, for the presence of such a
person is one of the prominent generic requirements. It is true that the poem does
not name a specific addressee, but it makes it clear throughout that whoever
reads/listens to it and understands its message might eventually improve his own
life and become a better person. However, I tend to believe that Gregory had in
mind a more specific audience. As already mentioned, in one place he claims to be
speaking to those who are united with himself in love and suffering, who yearn
for the cross, love the path of rectitude and have compassion for the fallen (line
240). Whether this refers to any Christian reader, or more specifically to the
monks whose company he sought all his life, is hard to know. I am inclined to

14 The overall impression one gets from reading the poem is that the language is totally Ho-
meric. However, if one looks more closely, the impression changes. For example, Gregorys use of
compound adjectives is not totally Homeric. Of the roughly 50 compound adjectives found in the
poem, about 30 are attested in Homer, while the rest come from later sources, such as Hesiod, Pindar,
Callimachus and Theocritus. A small number of compound adjectives, three or four, might be hapax
legomena (monophorbos, opsitokos, methuplanes, christophoros).
15 There are about 23 similes in the poem, long and short, from one line, to twenty-five lines
long. The short ones are applied usually to other people (Caesarius shone like the morning star in the
imperial palace), or to general statements (human prosperity is as slight as the wake the ship leaves
behind), while the longer, more elaborate ones, with multiple correspondences between the simile
and the surrounding narrative, invariably apply to Gregorys own life and circumstances.
 Gregory of Nazianzuss De rebus suis 51

think that many of his poems, in particular those written in Homeric language, are
meant primarily for the (ideally) well educated monks and clergy. I see a further
indication of that in the so-called Poemata arcana, where Gregory says that his
words will be directed to the pure, or those on the path to purification (e
katharoisin ee kathairomenoisin), and also to those in the know (epistamenois
dagoreuso).16 That terminology is very similar to the expressions found in our
poem, and it implies not only the same generic identification, but also the same
imaginary addressee.
The overall conceptual simplicity as already pointed out is quite obvi-
ous: the whole poem is meant to illustrate the idea of the two paths/exit doors
from life, and the difficulty of staying on the right path that leads to the right gate.
Such simple binary concepts, it seems, are very characteristic of the whole genre.
The originator of the genre, Hesiod, whose Works and Days was recognized in an-
tiquity as the benchmark against which later didactic epic can be measured,17
had placed at the center of his poem the opposition between the two erides, the
good eris (competition in hard work, justice) and the evil eris (quarreling and vio-
lence, injustice), and the two paths that lead to them. In the same way, the pre-So-
cratic philosopher Empedocles, in his poem On Nature known to us in frag-
ments only had singled out the struggle between the agencies of Love and
Strife, which in turn define the dynamics of interaction of the four basic elements,
as the foundation of his cosmic system and a good organizing principle for his
poem.18 His older contemporary Parmenides, also known to us in fragments only,
had based his exposition on the nature of reality on the Way of Truth, on the one
hand, and the Way of Seeming, on the other. He, like our Gregory, had also em-
ployed the image of the two gates/two paths:
Here are the gates of the paths of Night and Day,
And a lintel and a stone threshold enclose them.
To their very top they are filled with great doors.
Justice the punisher fastens now one, now the other.19
The image of the two gates, however, was not original with Parmenides, ei-
ther he might have borrowed it from the grandfather of all epic genres, the great
Homer himself. In a famous passage from the Odyssey, Homer, in Penelopes
words, describes the two gates through which dreams come, one made of ivory,
the other made of horn; the dreams coming through the ivory gate are of no conse-
quence whatsoever, while those coming through the gate of horn are true and pro-

16 Carmen 1, 1, 1, lines 910; 19, ed. D. A. Sykes, St. Gregory of Nazianzus. Poemata Arcana,
Oxford 1997, 2.
17 P. Toohey, 21.
18 The great Lucretius, who had probably used Empedocles as his own literary model, could
also be said to have based his cosmic system, as enunciated in his initial programmatic statement (Bk. 1,
5061), on a dual process whereby things combine and are once more dissolved into their constitu-
ents: D. Sedley, Lucretius and the Transformation of Greek Wisdom, Cambridge 1998, 28.
19 Translated by P. Toohey, 37. Once again, Lucretius, the quintessential didactic poet, em-
ploys similar imagery in Bk. 6, 32.
52 ^elica Milovanovi}

phetic (Book 19, 5627). Considering that didactic epic is ultimately an offshoot
of the older, heroic epic, it is not surprising that this well-known Homeric conceit
had been used as a hallmark of the new genre. Gregory is clearly aware of where
the idea had come from and the first words of his programmatic statement doiai
gar te pulai thnetois stugerou thanatoio (=among mortals two gates towards hate-
ful death are open: line 37) go back to Homer directly.
Another distinctive feature of the epic didactic genre although not univer-
sally recognized as such would be the special form given to the extended,
so-called Homeric, simile. In modern scholarship it was David West who first
pointed out that not all Homeric similes had been created equal.20 For, whereas
Homer employed the extended simile to illustrate only one most prominent aspect
of the action, the didactic poet, on the other hand, had a tendency to build multi-
ple-correspondence similes. In that type of simile the as part, and the so, thus
part of the comparison share a number of points in common.21 Here is an example
from De rebus suis:
It is as when by the banks of a river in flood a pine tree or a flourishing
plane is torn from its roots by the passing surge and destroyed. First all the
foundations are undermined, and the tree leans headlong over the bank.
Then it is broken off from the slight roots by which it still clings, and it is
whirled into the middle of the torrent. Amid great crackling it is borne
among the rocks, where it rots under the constant wear of flood and flotsam.
There it lies by the banks, a wretched trunk. So with my soul. It was flour-
ishing for Christ the King. But in furious onset the inexorable enemy cast it
to earth. Most of it perished, and the pitiable remnant is borne hither and
thither. God alone can raise it up again (lines 529546).22
The motif of the river in flood that uproots and carries away a mighty tree is
definitely reminiscent of several similes scattered throughout the Iliad, but Greg-
orys version is not a simple copy, but rather a variation on a traditional theme.
The closest parallel from Homer would be this one:
As when a river swollen in winter spate courses down to the plain from the
mountains, sped by rain from Zeus, and sweeps into its current many dead
trees, oaks and pines, and washes a mass of drift-wood into the sea, so then
glorious Aias swept havoc over the plain, cutting down horses and men.23

20 D. West, Virgilian multiple-correspondence similes and their antecedents, Philologus 114

(1970), 262275, suggested that Virgils practice of introducing multiple points of comparison be-
tween the simile and the surrounding narrative was an imitation of Lucretiuss practice. Continuing in
the same line of research, David Sedley, Lucretius and the Transformation of Greek Wisdom, Cam-
bridge 1998, 11, pointed out that the practice is actually older than Lucretius, going back to his literary
model, Empedocles, and that the technique is singularly at home in philosophical poetry.
21 Although she is aware that Gregorian similes, unlike Homers own, are built around more
than one point of comparison, V. A. Frangeskou, Gregory Nazianzens usage of the Homeric simile,
Hellenika 36 (1985), 1226 does not recognize this as a characteristic of didactic epic.
22 A similar extended simile, based on the same Homeric subject matter, but including a great
number of elaborate correspondences, can be found in Lucretius, Bk. 1, 265297. See West, 272 sqq.
23 Iliad 11, 492497 transl. by M. Hammond, Homer. The Iliad, London 1987, 206.
 Gregory of Nazianzuss De rebus suis 53

In Homers matter-of-fact analogy the rampaging hero Aias is compared to a

flooding river (sweeping havoc); he is cutting down horses and men in the same
way as the river sweeps away many dead trees. The analogy is based on the com-
parison of two physical events, and characteristically, there are no direct verbal
correspondences between the two halves of the simile.
Gregorys version, on the other hand, is not just longer, including a more
elaborate description of the event, it also differs from Homers in the fact that it
offers several points of comparison, as well as verbal, syntactical and metaphori-
cal correspondences. The analogy is drawn between a physical event and an emo-
tional state. Here is what Gregory is saying: before, his soul was good and well
like a flourishing tree (e pitun e plataniston komoosan. . . kai emen psuchen
thalethousan); in a furious attack of the demon, that is the flood (rhoos geiton. . .
echthros ateires), it was shaken to the core and thrown to the ground like a tree
broken off from its roots (aporrhexas mesatais eni kabbale dinais. . . epaisson
chamadis balen); what little life, i.e. faith, remains in his soul he is unable to ef-
fectively defend from the continuing attacks of the demon, for it rots like the
wretched trunk of the fallen tree in the middle of the torrent (atimotaton de tru-
phos para cheilesi keitai. . . micron de ti leipsanon plazetai); however, he is hope-
ful that God will restore his soul (. . .theou ge min authis egeirai), for it is in His
power to raise us and the tree up again, just as He had created us out of nothing.
Such a degree of elaboration is never found in Homers own similes. It is a
distinct feature of literature meant for instruction, whether technical, philosophical
or moral. In our poem, however, the river-in-flood simile is not the only example
of this type. Another is the already mentioned story of the Good Samaritan. That
simile is even more remarkable because it is based on specifically Christian sub-
ject matter.24 It offers an impressive list of correspondences, verbal and syntacti-
cal (often arranged in a chiastic order), as well as the so-called transfusion of
metaphor.25
Without quoting the whole simile, for it is unusually long (lines 367392),
we will list here the most prominent (there are more!) verbal correspondences.
Just like that man traveling down from Jerusalem, Gregory too, traveling from the
noble city (ex hieres kationta poleos hoditen. . . kai me kednes katabanta poleos),
was attacked by a robber, i.e. devil (phores lochoontes edelesanto kakoi. . .
edaixen lestes biotou megairon psuchesin); he was stripped of his clothes, i.e. of
the grace of Christ, and left naked (heimata ekdusantes ha min skepe. . . Christou
m apeduse charin kai gumnon etheken); he appeared to be dead, and neither a Le-
vite, nor a priest going by had any pity on him, only a passing Samaritan pitied
him (leipsan apopsuchonta; Leuites hiereus te lipon te; kai pou Samareon tis

24 Whether Gregory was the first Christian poet to write Homeric similes based on biblical
themes I cannot tell, but I do not know of any others.
25 The transfusion of metaphor, according to West, 265, is the metaphorical use in the narra-
tive of terms borrowed from the world of the simile as well as the metaphorical use in the simile
of terms borrowed from the world of the narrative.
54 ^elica Milovanovi}

eleere. . .), took him to the inn to be nursed back to health, and gave money for the
medicines for his wounds (kai min agon katedese kai helkesi pharmaka eleipe. . .).
Then, in a reversal (transfusion) of metaphor, Gregory identifies completely
with the man from the story: he is not any longer like that man, he is that man. He
begs Christ to have pity on him since he was abandoned by the priests (. . . alla
me, Anax, eleaire, thanatoio saoson, hon leipsan hierees), to save him from the
robbers and wicked fellow-travelers (. . . phores kai paroditas nelea thumon
echontas), to bandage his wounds and to lead him to the universal inn in the holy
city (. . . helkea eu katadeson agon epi pandokon oikon).
This, clearly, is not a piece of writing dashed of nonchalantly, in a moment
of inspiration; this is a deeply considered and carefully executed comparison
where every word carries its appointed weight and contributes to an intricate and
deliberate pattern of sound and meaning.26 And lest we forget that impressive
display of verbal virtuosity is realized in a language that had long since fallen out
of use, the Homeric (Ionian) language of the heroic epic. Gregory had a good rea-
son, after all, to be proud of his verbal dexterity.
The metaphrastic nature of this poem and Gregorys poetry in general
deserves a closer look too. The practice of changing prose to verse, and vice versa,
was nothing new in itself; it was a well-known element of rhetorical instruction in
antiquity. Gregory himself states clearly that his poetical works are based on mate-
rial from either his own or other (non-Christian) authors prose works (logoi;
mythoi); that material, consisting of passages containing prominent ideas, or other-
wise notable for their verbal qualities, was available to him because it had been
preserved in writing.27 I imagine Gregory must have kept a notebook where he
copied excerpts from his readings and where he would also jot down his own
thoughts and insights; if that indeed was the case, it would help explain why there
are so many cross-references throughout his work.
However, when the change involved a technical exposition of some kind,
the transition from prose to verse was not simple and straightforward; it was based
on certain rules to which modern scholarship had not been paying much attention
until recently. To my knowledge, it was David Sedley, in his study on Lucretius
and his literary forebear Empedocles, who was the first to demonstrate that the po-
ets engaged in versification of technical/scientific subject matter purposely
avoided the technical terms belonging to that specific discipline, substituting for
them a series of allegorical expressions and mutually complementary, live meta-
phors.28

26 In addition to the above quoted similes, another one is quite interesting, too; in lines 5563
Gregory speaks of a former experience whereby the evil one, disguised as a good person, had
tricked him and taken away his better judgment, just as a fisherman tricks a fish by offering it a bait
with a bronze hook inside. In my opinion this might be a hidden allusion to the infamous Maximus af-
fair from the time of Gregorys stay in Constantinople.
27 On His Own Verses, Carm. 2.1.39, 647, PG 37, col. 1334.
28 D. Sedley, 43 sqq. The finding that a didactic poet should actually avoid using technical
terms is somehow counterintuitive and thus even more interesting. The opposing, earlier view would
 Gregory of Nazianzuss De rebus suis 55

Such a tendency can definitely be found in De rebus suis too. The techni-
cal subtext of the poem is the Scriptures, or, more specifically, Christian theology
and liturgy. However, the archaic language in which the poem was written was ob-
viously ill-suited for expressing the radically new concepts and materials. So, how
did Gregory handle this difficulty? His approach was quite complex, as a matter of
fact. On the one hand, he did not hesitate to include all kinds of biblical names and
references, or specific theological concepts, such as, to mention but one, Trias
(=Trinity); he also allowed the presence of a whole series of non-technical words
from other, later literary sources all the while maintaining successfully the illu-
sion of speaking in the pure Homeric language. On the other hand, he clearly and
purposely tried to avoid the use of some common liturgical terms, otherwise well
attested in Christian writings of the time, using instead cumbersome poetic periph-
rases.
Here are some examples. The expressions from the creed, such as homo-
ousion toi patri (=of the same essence as the Father), enanthropesanta (=become
man), and ek tou patros ekporeuomenon (=who proceeds from the father), Gregory
renders as phusis gennetoros ise (line 628), and epei brotos autos etuchthes (line
14), and pneuma ho patrothen eisi (line 630); the common phrase, found in the lit-
urgies of James, Basil and John Chrysostom alike, thusian logiken anapherein
(=the offering of spiritual sacrifice), in Gregorys interpretation reads as thuelen
pneumatos ouk anepempsa (line 334); another liturgical expression pasan ten
biotiken apothometha merimnan (=let us put away all worldly care) is rendered as
biotou te fugon sarkos te merimnas (line 263), or again kakas apopempe merimnas
(line 419); the oft repeated prayer hilastheti moi toi hamartoloi (=have mercy on
me a sinner) becomes hilathi soi theraponti brithonti kakoisin (line 402); his own
state of being not yet baptized Gregory describes as psuchen ateleston eichon et
ouraniou charismatos eute loetroi (=my soul was as yet uninitiated in rites of
heavenly grace, for the lack of the washing: line 324).
Also, when he elaborates on the concept of the two gates/paths (lines
461463), which, as already mentioned, is quite common in this genre, he is also,
quite obviously, alluding to the narrow gate from Matt.7, 13. However, his
words are very carefully chosen so as to avoid a direct quotation from the Gospel.
This may be due, at least in part, to the effort of staying within the bounds of the
Homeric language; otherwise, it is a distinct characteristic of the genre. For, it is
noticeable that in other passages within the same poem the normal, i.e., current,
words for prayer and ritual occur without a problem. Thus, the numerous para-
phrases testify to Gregorys awareness of the rules of the didactic genre and his at-
tempt to apply them to his poem.
Finally, one may ask how De rebus suis measures up against the bench-
mark of the genre, Hesiods Works and Days. For, it is my belief that in writing

claim that it was good didactic practice to allow prose words as technical terms of direct communi-
cation, in preference to cumbersome poetic periphrases: D. A. Sykes, St. Gregory of Nazianzus
Poemata Arcana, Oxford New York 1997, 60.
56 ^elica Milovanovi}

this poem Gregory was actually emulating that work. The overall structure of De
rebus suis seems to replicate the structure of the first part of Works and Days. Just
as Hesiod begins with an opening invocation after which he states the main theme
(=the two erides, work versus violence), and then introduces in succession the
myth of Prometheus, the myth of the Five Ages and the fable of the hawk and
nightingale, so does Gregory begin with an opening prayer after which he states
his main theme (=the two exit gates/pathways in life), and then recounts the story
of the Good Samaritan, the story of the publican and the Pharisee, and the family
story of his early dedication to Christ. Another striking similarity is in the fact that
in the middle of his moralizing comments Hesiod stops to warn his brother that
The eye of Zeus sees all, notices all; it sees all this, too, if it wishes, and knows
exactly what sort of host this town is to justice;29 in the same way Gregory warns
his readers to fear the great eye which sees beneath the earth, penetrates the im-
mense depths of the ocean, and whatsoever the mind of man conceals (lines
518520).
And yet, in spite of the fact that Gregory followed such a venerable model,
he was quite successful in putting his own unmistakable stamp on the whole. The
authorial voice in this piece is his own, not Hesiods, throughout. Also, here too,
as everywhere else in his writings, Gregory succeeded in combining the old, pa-
gan, and the new, Christian, materials seamlessly. Thus De rebus suis stands as
another witness to the creative possibilities of tradition combined with originality,
the bedrock on which ancient literature rested securely for more than a thousand
years.

^elica Milovanovi}
PESMA GRIGORIJA BOGOSLOVA DE REBUS SUIS
U OKVIRU TRADICIJE ANTI^KOG DIDAKTI^KOG EPA

Didakti~ki ep pojavio se u istoriji anti~ke kwi`evnosti u isto vre-

me, ili ne{to posle pojave herojskog epa, i wegov prvi predstavnik bio je
Hesiodov spev Poslovi i dani. Uprkos nepoeti~nim temama koje su mu svoj-
stvene (teme iz zemqoradwe, filosofije, medicine, astronomije, geografije,
lova, ribolova, itd.), ovaj kwi`evni rod bio je dugo omiqen i cvetao je sve
do u 5. vek nove ere. Jedan od uzroka wegove omiqenosti verovatno je bila i

29 Works and Days 267269, transl. A. N. Athanassakis, Hesiod, Theogony. Works and Days.
Shield, Baltimore and London 1983, 73.
 Gregory of Nazianzuss De rebus suis 57

izrazita sklonost ka moralnoj pouci, koja se bez obzira na usko tehni~ku

tematiku mo`e na}i u svakom od wegovih predstavnika.
Kao i drugi kwi`evni rodovi u antici, i didakti~ki ep po{tovao je
izvestan broj formalnih pravila, kao na primer, odre|enu du`inu (u prose-
ku oko 800 stihova), metri~ki oblik (heksametar), arhai~an jezik (homerski
dijalekt), upotrebu stilskih figura (naro~ito razvijenih pore|ewa), `ivah-
nu naraciju (isprekidanu dijalogom, opisima, direktnim obra}awem ~itao-
cu, itd.), umetawe uo~qivih digresija (~esto na mitolo{ke teme), jednostav-
nost kompozicije (dobro se redovno suprotstavqa r|avom), itd. Isto ta-
ko, pretakawe tehni~ke sadr`ine iz proze u epsku poeziju uzrokovalo je i
sklonost ka izbegavawu strogo tehni~kih termina i wihovo zamewivawe po-
etskim opisima.
Grigorijeva pesma De rebus suis (Carm. 2, 1, 1) po{tuje sva navedena
pravila. Wena sadr`ina izrasta iz jevan|eoske teme o dvama vratima i dvama
putevima (U|ite na uska vrata, jer su {iroka vrata i {irok put {to vode u
propast, i mnogo ih ima koji wim idu. Kao {to su uska vrata i tijesan put
{to vode u `ivot, i malo ih je koji ga nalaze: Mat. 7, 1314). Odatle Grigo-
rije prelazi na istoriju svoga `ivota i `ivotnih ideala. Od mladosti svoje
on je uvek i svesno te`io ka vratima uskim, ali mu se nije dalo da neometano
stigne do svog ciqa; razne `ivotne brige, porodi~ni problemi, ideolo{ke
borbe u okviru crkve, a onda i wegova li~na starost i bolest, kao da su se
svi zaverili da ga na silu odvuku od dobroga puta i li{e ga kona~ne nagrade
kojoj se uvek svesrdno nadao. Sad kad je ostario i oboleo (mo`dani udar?),
du{a wegova napa}ena po~ela je da posustaje; duhovna vatra i predanost koja
mu je jednom prilikom, u ranoj mladosti, bila omogu}ila ~udesni uspon i
direktnu spoznaju svete Trojice, sad je i{~ilela. Taj umor du{evni fi-
zi~ka bolest s wim se ne mo`e ni porediti to mu od svega najte`e pada,
ali ga istovremeno i podsti~e da otvoreno o svom stawu govori da bi tako
pomogao drugima koji se mo`da nalaze u sli~noj situaciji. Jer uprkos svemu,
on ne gubi nadu na pomo} i spasewe, i usrdno moli Hrista da mu podari veru
~istu i delatnu, kao nekad, i da mu dozvoli da neosu|eno pro|e kroz vrata
uska u `ivot ve~ni.
Od formalnih osobina koje ukazuju na pripadnost odre|enom kwi`ev-
nom rodu, to jest didakti~kom epu, posebna pa`wa posve}ena je razvijenim
pore|ewima. Ta pore|ewa, mada se obi~no nazivaju homerskim, u didak-
ti~kom epu imaju ne{to druk~iji oblik i funkciju; za razliku od Homero-
vih pore|ewa koja obi~no ilustruju samo jedan element doga|aja koji se opi-
suje, didakti~ka pore|ewa namerno tra`e, i pa`qivo navode sve dodirne
ta~ke koje postoje izme|u opisa doga|aja i ilustrativnog materijala. Ta va-
rijanta razvijenog pore|ewa pojavila se najpre u Empedokla, u spevu O pri-
rodi, i odmah je prihva}ena kao posebna osobina ovog kwi`evnog roda
(ukqu~uju}i i wegove rimske predstavnike, Lukrecija, Vergilija, i dr.). U
svojoj celini, me|utim, pesma De rebus suis verovatno je sastavqena po uzoru
na Hesiodove Poslove i dane.
58 ^elica Milovanovi}

APPENDIX

DE REBUS SUIS IN SERBIAN TRANSLATION

GRIGORIJE BOGOSLOV: O STVARIMA PRIVATNIM

Molitva za pomo} u nevoqi i bolesti

Hriste vladaru, dok je sluga tvoj Mojsije na vrh brda stajao sa rukama
svojim ~istim u obli~je krsta podignutim, ti si odbio napad i silu pogubnu
Amalikovu Izlaz. 17, 813; kad je, pak, Danilo u jami ruke svoje ispru`io,
ti sam si tim rukama zatvorio grozna usta lavovska i ustavio stravi~ne
o{trice kanxi wihovih Dan. 6, 22; tvoja je zasluga {to je Jona, kad se pomo-
lio i ruke na molitvu u trbuhu ribqem podigao, iz ribe-kita napoqe isko-
~io Jon. 2, 111; u ogwu asirskome oblak rosni okru`io je tri mladi}a ~im
su ruke na molitvu ra{irili Dan. 3, 1230; /10/ ti sam si onomad po usta-
lasanom moru pe{ke hodio, uti{av{i silu vetra i valova, da izbavi{ iz bu-
re u~enike svoje prepla{ene Mat. 14, 2433; mnogima si du{u i udove ra-
slabqene spasao od bolesti, jer ti si Bog u obliku ~ove~ijem, sa smrtnicima
si se izme{ao; to {to si od iskona bio, to si nama tek nedavno pokazao, da
bi i mene bogom na~inio, po{to si sam ~ovek postao; na isti na~in, dakle, i
meni u pomo} priteci, tebi vapijem, Bo`e blagi i milostivi; do|i, milo-
stivi Bo`e, pru`i ruku svoju, spasi me od propasti u ratu, me|u zveriwem, u
ogwu i oluji, /20/ jer pogled je moj uvek u nebo upravqen. A te zveri, to nadi-
mawe i divqawe valova morskih, i borba neprestana {to jad i uzdisawe do-
nosi, i razbuktali ogaw u`areni sve su to qudi nevaqali, napast pogubna,
oni {to najgore mrze sve {to Boga voli i po{tuje, oni {to se ne boje stra-
{noga suda potoweg niti se obziru na bra}u svoju kojima je greh omrznuo. Od
takvih qudi me ogradi, Hriste, i ne prestaj ~uvati me, mili, u zaklonu kri-
la tvojih; oteraj jad i crnu tugu daleko od sluge svoga; /30/ ne dozvoli da te-
{ke brige potresaju um moj, jer te brige stvara u nama bednim qudima svet
ovaj i wegov vladar kleti; oni kao r|a gvo`|e izjedaju iznutra obli~je bogo-
liko, i na zemqu obaraju i onaj boqi deo bi}a na{eg, ne dopu{taju}i da du-
{a uvis povu~e ovaj prah telesni {to po zemqi hodi, nego ba{ naprotiv `e-
le}i da zlosre}ni prah na dole povu~e du{u na{u; a du{a ima krila, istina,
ali je kroz blato i u blatu ovaplo}ena.

U|ite na uska vrata; jer su {iroka vrata i {irok put {to vode u
propast, i mnogo ih ima koji wim idu Mat. 7, 33.
Dvoja su vrata smrtnicima otvorena u smrt `alosnu. Jer neki smrtnici
u duhu svome imaju blatwavi izvor nevaqalstva, wima su svagda na pameti
dela opaka, i saveti pogubni, /40/ i kako telu da ugode a sit stomak je na-
silnik veliki! i oni sami sebe na greh svaki podsti~u, u prestupima u`i-
vaju i sopstvenu propast veselo do~ekuju. Drugi, pak, za to vreme ~istim
 Gregory of Nazianzuss De rebus suis 59

okom uma svoga u Boga gledaju, i opaku drskost sveta razuzdanog nenavide, ne-
go `ivot kao senke u ispo{}enom telu provode, daleko od svega {to je gre{no
i prqavo; duhom istan~ani, oni lakim stopama po zemqi hode i na poziv
bo`ji spremno odgovaraju, sledbenici nevidqivog `ivota Hrista vladara, u
nadi da }e i sami, kad taj `ivot kona~no osvane, zablistati jednom za svagda
kao sunce sjajno. /50/ Ali i oni neizbe`no trpe rane i ubode od o{trog trwa
`ivotnog, dok im |avo, zlotvor mahniti, iz zasede smi{qa nebrojene muke i
stradawa ej, jadni li su, smrtnici kleti! jer on ~esto krije svoje pogub-
ne namere pod obrazinom ~estitosti, naro~ito onda kad u otvorenoj borbi
po~ne da gubi i primoran je da se povla~i. On qudima snuje propast ba{ kao
{to bronzana udica u mamcu skrivena ribama smrt donosi dok `eqne `i-
vota za hranom zevaju, one u utrobu svoju gutaju pogibiju neo~ekivanu i zlo-
kobni ~as sudwi. Tako i meni, ~im sam shvatio da je kao no} crn, /60/ podlac
do|e preobu~en u lik dobra ~oveka svetlosti podobna, i prosto mi uze pamet,
zato da bih u svojoj `eqi za vrlinom u nevaqalstvo skrenuo.

@eqe Grigorijeve i te`we mladala~ke

Brak, ta bujica `ivota i najte`i okov {to je materijalna priroda qu-
dima nametnula, taj za~etnik svake muke i nevoqe, mene nikad nije sputao;
nisu me privukle ni divne tkanine svilene, niti sam hrane}i stomak nezaja-
zni zavoleo trpezu obilnu mater nesre}nu bluda i ne~istote; nisam navi-
kao da prebivam u ku}ama sjajnim i velelepnim, niti sam duh svoj i raspolo-
`ewe le~io ne`nim napevima muzi~kim, /70/ ili pot~inio mekoputnim ~a-
rima trava mirisnih. Zlato i srebro pustio sam drugima u nadle`nost, oni-
ma {to u`ivaju da sede na blagu nebrojenom i brinu brige velike jadno li
im je u`ivawe, a napor pogolem! Ne, naprotiv, meni je mio suv hleb je~meni
i trpeza skromna, so mi je za~in najsla|i, voda ~ista uz jelo napitak, to je
meni bogatstvo najve}e, to i Hristos koji um moj stalno uvis di`e i usmera-
va. Ja ne posedujem poqa `itorodna ni lugove prijatne, nemam krda volova
ni pretila stada ovaca, nemam slugu odanih a sluge su nama rod ro|eni,
/80/ samo {to ih je nepravda jo{ odavno od nas odvojila i dva nam imena na-
metnula, nama ime qudi slobodnih, wima robova, mada smo od iste zemqe ro-
|eni, od iste zemqe i od Boga jednoga; zakon nepravi~ni tek posle je do{ao.
^ast i po~ast koju qudi ukazuju, {to kao vihor naleti i za~as se izgu-
bi, kao i slava kratkoga veka, meni nisu potrebne; nije mi stalo ni da od ca-
ra dobijem visok polo`aj na dvoru, niti sam ikad po`eleo da sednem na su-
dijski presto i da odatle u slavi predsedavam i oholo, pun ponosa, di`em
ve|e svoje; snaga, mo} i uticaj me|u gra|anima tako|e me ne privla~e, niti se
zavaravam praznim i nepostojanim snovima /90/ {to idu ~as u jednom pravcu,
~as u drugom, pa svi zajedno nestaju bez traga. Kao da u dlanove zagrabi{ vo-
du koja `urno te~e, ili senku da rukama ~vrsto uhvati{, ili izmaglicu da
opipa{, takav ti je `ivot qudski, takva je i sre}a i blagostawe wihovo
brazde nepostojane {to la|a na pu~ini zaorava, spreda vodu se~e, iza sebe
ni{ta ne ostavqa. Jedno mi je samo omilelo, dobar glas {to sam svojim obra-
60 ^elica Milovanovi}

zovawem stekao, obrazovawem kwi`evnim koje su mi pru`ili istok i zapad,

i Atina, slava i ponos Jelade. Puno truda i dugo vremena sam u tu nauku ulo-
`io, ali sam i wu ni~ice na zemqu bacio i pred noge Hristu polo`io; /100/
kwi`evnost je ustuknula pred re~ju Boga velikoga, jer re~ bo`ja nadvisuje i
prekriva svaku pri~u ispredenu u radionici smrtnoga uma.
To sam isku{ewe dakle, zaobi{ao, ali nisam uspeo da umaknem podloj
mr`wi neprijateqa koji je pod obrazinom prijateqstva ~u~ao u zasedi. Svo-
ju nevoqu }u svima javno da ispri~am mo`da }e neko tako uspeti da izbeg-
ne zle nakane ove zveri vijugave.

Briga o roditeqima i starawe o imawu

Mislio sam, Hriste vladaru, da ako ostanem pored roditeqa, satrve-
nih odurnom staro{}u i `alo{}u, ja, wihovo jedino preostalo ~edo, slaba-
{na nada, jadni plami~ak od lu~e velike koje vi{e nema, /110/ da }u tako te-
bi, bla`eni, i tvojim zakonima po{tu ukazati, jer ti si qudima omogu}io da
ra|aju sinove, da im budu potpora u starosti i da im drhtave udove kao {ta-
pom podupiru. Jer koji tebe iznad svega po{tuju i pobo`nost u srcu neguju i
dr`e se podaqe od beda i nevoqa ovog `ivota tegobnog, ti su uistinu u`ad
svoju, kao la|a morska, za besprekorne zakone tvoje ~vrsto privezali; ti si
wima meta i po~etak.
Majka je moja od davnih predaka povukla veru bogougodnu, te je i svoju
decu tim zlatnim lancem sputala; imala je duh mu{ki, u obli~ju `enstve-
nom, /120/ i zemqe se samo utoliko doticala, i na svet pa`we obra}ala, ko-
liko da `ivot ovda{wi za onaj nebesni takore}i na silu zameni, i da laka ko-
raka u visine vazdu{ne stupi. Otac, pak, u po~etku je me|u idolopoklonicima
`iveo, kao divqa maslina, ali se posle ~vrsto privio uz stablo ove pitome
masline, i toliku je snagu iz korena plemenitog pocrpao da je ostala stabla
nadvisio i mnogo qudi svojim kao med slatkim plodom nasitio. Seda glava,
sede i zrele pameti, blag i blogore~iv, novi Mojsije, ili mo`da Aron, na po
puta izme|u nas i nebesnoga Boga /130/ stoje}i, on je kroz ~istu slu`bu i `r-
tve kakve mi prinosimo, to jest unutra{wim bi}em i umom posve}enim, pri-
bli`avao i privodio jedno drugome, nas smrtnike i Boga velikog besmrtnog.
Od takvog sam, dakle, oca i majke potekao s wima se porediti, to ne
dolazi u obzir, ali sam zato uvek spreman da wih dvoje jedno s drugim pore-
dim. Dok sam o wima brinuo i wihove muke olak{avao, duh svoj sam hrabrio
pomi{qu i nadom da je to {to ~inim zaista plemenito i da time otpla}ujem
prirodni dug. Da, koliko li je tek r|avima put ispuwen te{ko}ama i pre-
prekama, kad je i meni jadnom tada{wa dobrota na zlo iza{la?! /140/ Mnoge
i te{ke brige sad izjedaju du{u i udove moje no}u i dawu bez prestanka i na
silu me vuku sa neba na maj~icu zemqu. Prvo i prvo, slu`in~adi naredbe da-
vati to ti je zamka pogubna. Stroge gospodare oni uvek mrze, a milosrdne
besramno izrabquju, te niti su zlom gospodaru podatni, niti dobrog slu{a-
ju, nego i na jednog i na drugog upravqaju `alac `u~i i mr`we nerazumne.
Pa onda, voditi ra~una o imovini, i sav teret cara i dr`ave na svojim ple-
 Gregory of Nazianzuss De rebus suis 61

}ima imati, i o{tre prekore poreskog ~inovnika podnositi /150/ obave-

zni porez na imovinu ograni~ava slobodu qudima i katanac im na usta po-
stavqa; pa vrteti se po bu~noj i prenatrpanoj tr`nici, ili oko visokih nad-
le`nika, a zbog neke sitne parnice, i podnositi sa dve strane viku i derwa-
vu tu`ioca i branioca, ili pak biti uhva}en u prevrtqivu mre`u zakona i
snositi posledice to ti je tek muka i napor veliki, i tu nevaqali boqe
prolaze nego ~estiti, dok takozvani ~uvari zakona primaju mito i od jednih
i od drugih; ako krivac vi{e ponudi, on dobija parnicu. Zar bi iko /160/ bez
pomo}i bo`je me|u takvim qudima mogao da izbegne sve la`i i smicalice?!
Tu treba ili glavom bez obzira be`ati i r|avima sve prepustiti, ili svoju
milu du{u na isti na~in zlodelima okaqati; ko se suvi{e pribli`i opa-
snoj jari razbuktalog ogwa, taj na sebi ru`ne belege od vatre i dima nosi.

Smrt bratovqeva; se}awe na misti~ni do`ivqaj iz mladosti

No, to se jo{ i mo`e podneti. Mnogo je bolnije, kao rana `iva, sve ono
{to sam posle bratovqevog odlaska iz ovog `ivota ja li~no pretrpeo, i jo{
imam da trpim ko jednom u neo~ekivanu nevoqu upadne, taj se boqem ne na-
da. Dok mi je brat bio u `ivotu, u svakom pogledu sam uspeh i dobar glas
u`ivao, /170/ a bogatstvo i visok polo`aj i uticaj, nisu mi bili ni na kraj
pameti; sad kad je umro, ja u samo}i patim i uzdi{em. [to je bilo u wega
imovine, to je delom progutala zemqa zaja`ena, za vreme zemqotresa u Nike-
ji, a ostalo je |avo stavio na milost i nemilost grabqivim nevaqalcima i
prevarantima. On sam tada se bio sklonio i smrt je izbegao Bog je ruku
svoju podr`ao nad krovom pod kojim se on bio sklonio. E, moj Cezarije! Ne-
kada si, ime slavno, kao zvezda danica na carskom dvoru blistao, nedosti`an
u mudrosti i neprevazi|en u skromnosti, /180/ okru`en mnogobrojnim dra-
gim i uticajnim prijateqima. Mnogima si pru`io olak{awe od mu~nih bo-
lesti, mnogima si siroma{tvo ubla`io, uvek ispravno postupaju}i. Sad kad
si umro, mnoge si pse nasitio, sve ove {to su me okru`ili i na mene odasvud
laju. Od rodbine niko nema da mi u pomo} pritekne. Neki me kao i vole, ali
na na~in neprijateqski; ukazuju ti po{tovawe samo dok ne dobiju ono {to
ho}e, a ~im se toga do~epaju, mrze te. Kao kad se mo}ni hrast sru{i pod nale-
tom vetrova te qudi iz cele okoline navale i na sve strane razvuku grane we-
gove; ili kao kad se polomi ograda oko velikog vinograda, /190/ te prolazni-
ci bezobzirno tu|e gro`|e beru, a divqi vepar nezasiti svojim zubom sve
razriva, tako i meni do|e da od muke do neba vapijem. Ruka moja je nemo}na
bilo da ih sve zadovoqi, bilo da ih rastera.
Otkako sam se jo{ ono davno od `ivota odvojio i du{u svoju u razmi-
{qawa nebesna i u svetlost zaronio, kad me je um visoki povukao i daleko
od tela odneo, pa me uspravnog spustio u skrivenu odaju {atora nebesnoga
gde je svetlo svete Trojice o~i moje obasjalo, svetlo od kojega ni{ta svetlije
nisam mogao zamisliti, /200/ svetlo prestola visokoga, svetlo izvor svetlo-
sti, i ove obi~ne i one neiskazane, svetlo po~etak svega ovoga {to je vreme-
nom ograni~eno i od neba odvojeno, otada sam ja za svet, i svet za mene
62 ^elica Milovanovi}

umro, otada kao mrtvac sa jo{ ne{to malo preostalog daha `ivim, li{en
snage kao ~ovek snom ophrvan; `ivot je moj drugde, ja stewem i uzdi{em pod
teretom ovog grubog oklopa telesnog mudri qudi ga zovu mrakom razuma. I
`eqa mi je `arka da kad se oslobodim ovog `ivota i vida pomra~enog, daleko
od svega {to po zemqi hodi i luta i druge sa pravog puta zavodi, jo{ jasnije
sagledam sve ono {to se ne mewa, i to ne kao dosad, bez reda ume{ano u pri-
vi|awa senovita /210/ koja mogu da prevare oko i najo{trijeg uma, nego celu
istinu, okom ~istoga uma, licem u lice, netremice. Ali to kasnije. Ovde do-
le sve je dim prqav i prah crni, svi mi {to smo onaj veliki `ivot za `ivqe-
we ovda{we zamenili, visoko za zemaqsko, ve~no za propadqivo. Zato su na
mene svi navalili i ne nameravaju da se povuku, nego jure za lakom lovinom.
Avaj, avaj, Cezarije prah tu`ni, on je mene od svake napasti ogra|i-
vao, izda{no je davao da me od svake brige oslobodi, {tuju}i me kako niko
nikad nije brata {tovao, /220/ i uzdr`avaju}i se kao {to bi se neko drugi
pred ocem svojim qubqenim uzdr`avao. Ali nije sve to uzrok mome jadikova-
wu, ne `alim ja imawe rastureno, ionako sam hteo da ga delim sa siromasi-
ma, ta, i ja sam ovde samo na prolazu, potuka~ {to na ruku Vi{wega stalno
pogleda i odatle sebi dobra o~ekuje; niti pla~em zbog uvrede i sramote to
svako mrzi jer i najdobrodu{nijeg ~oveka zna da ispuni gor~inom `u~i; ni-
ti tu`im za bratom i sestrom, oboma rano preminulima, {to mi ih grob sad
skriva; ne, ni{ta od toga ja ne oplakujem toliko koliko svoju sopstvenu du-
{u, kao {to bi neko oplakivao /230/ kwegiwicu visoku i ubavu, blagorodne
kraqevske loze izdanak, vide}i je kako se mu~i u te{kim okovima neraskidi-
vim, jer su je neprijateqi kopqem savladali i u te{ko ropstvo bacili, te
sad tu`ne o~i svoje za zemqu prikiva. Tako ne{to sam ja prepatio, takvu ra-
nu na srcu nosim.
Ima jedna stara izreka da koga je quta guja otrovnim zubom ujela, taj o
bolnoj rani samo sa onima ho}e da razgovara koji su i sami iskusili zub i
vatreni otrov guje klete; takav ~ovek jedini zna kakav je to otrov stra{an.
/240/ Tako i ja, muku svoju samo }u onima da ispri~am koji istu qubav imaju,
istu nevoqu, patwu podjednaku. Moju pri~u blagonaklono bi primili i naj-
boqe bi razumeli {ta se krije u srcu bolnom samo oni koji `ude da na svo-
jim ple}ima ponesu krst te{ki i koji imaju svoje mesto u dvorovima Kraqa
velikoga; oni vole svakoga ko pravim putem hodi i `ale onoga {to se spota-
kao. Drugima bih bio za podsmeh, da im jade svoje sad po~nem da izla`em,
svima onima ~ija je nepostojana vera samo po povr{ini srca urezana, koji
nemaju u utrobi svojoj `arku qubav i ~e`wu za Vladarem, /250/ no `ive sad i
ovde i samo se o danu dana{wem brinu. Takvi da i{~eznu! Jer oni jezik svoj
oru`je uvek na boj spremno o{tre protiv svakoga bez razlike, bilo da je
~ovek ~estit, bilo nevaqalac. No, ja kukam, i sa kukwavom ne}u prestajati
sve dok se ne oslobodim svog nevaqalstva `alosnog i dok rezu ne postavim
na luda~ke strasti uma moga kojima je quti |avo sva vrata sad {irom otvo-
rio; ranije su bile ~vrsto ogra|ene, dok me je {titila ruka bo`ja, i r|av-
{tina tada nije imala zgodnog izgovora a brza je da se za izgovor prihvati
 Gregory of Nazianzuss De rebus suis 63

kao vatra {to se hvata obli`we trske /260/ i uz pomo} vetra plamen razbuk-
tali u zrak {aqe.

@ivot u mona{tvu neostvareni ideal

Kamo sre}e da sam pre svega ovoga sebe sakrio u vrletima strmenim i
grebenima gorskim! Kamo sre}e da sam `ivot ovaj, i sve brige `ivotne i te-
lesne izbegao, te da sad celoga Hrista u srcu svom nosim, sam, daleko od
ostalih prebivaju}i, i samo ka Bogu um posve}en uzdi`u}i, sve do onog dana
kada bih na krilima nade svoju metu dostigao! No, be{e mu. Qubav prema
dragim roditeqima me je zadr`ala, vuku}i me svojom te`inom dole na zemqu
mo`da ~ak ne toliko qubav koliko /270/ sa`aqewe, najne`nije od svih
ose}awa, {to prosto rastr`e um i utrobu celu; sa`aqewe zbog sedih kosa
bogolikih, sa`aqewe zbog patwe wihove, sa`aqewe zbog toga {to su decu
pogubili, sa`aqewe i zbog ovog sina preostalog nad kojim drhte i bdiju,
slatkom brigom, zenicom `ivota wihovog, jadima ophrvanog.
Nekada su wemu kwige bile drage, one {to ih je Duh Sveti ispisao je-
zikom svetaca svojih, draga i milost Duha plemenitoga {to kroz te kwige
prosijava, kao i skrivena korist koju samo ~isti qudi prepoznaju; drage su
mu bile molitve, i uzdisawe, i no}i besane, /280/ i horovi an|eoski {to se
stoje}i kroz pesmu Bogu obra}aju, i kroz pesmu du{u svoju Bogu upu}uju, pe-
smu zajedni~ku, a iz mnogih grla izvijanu; drage muke stomaka zlodelatnog,
smeh umeren, jezik usporen i o~i umirene, kao i qutwa luda~ka uzdom zau-
zdana. Um wegov, onaj {to voli svuda da zaviri, Re~ bo`ja, uz pomo} nada ne-
besnih, ~vrsto je dr`ala i ka Hristu usmeravala; Re~ je nad svime predseda-
vala i obli~je ovo na putu ka Vladaru je predvodila. Bog je odozgo s odobra-
vawem gledao. Umesto sada{wih briga oko imovine, ili bu~nih sva|a nesno-
snih /290/ koje me i no}u more i ru`nim snovima uznemiravaju jer vizije
no}ne podobne su brigama dnevnim tada mi je pred o~ima bilo svetlo
bo`je i slava svesjajnog hora du{a blago~estivih. No, sve to blago i{~ililo
je iz du{e moje: ona je nekad u`ivala u dru{tvu najboqem, a sad joj ostade sa-
mo `udwa i bol beznade`an. To je, dakle, uzrok mome jadikovawu. [ta }e su-
tra biti, ne znam ta~no da li }e me Bog re{iti ove nevoqe, da li }e oda-
gnati od mene sve muke i bolove i opet me u staro stawe vratiti, /300/ ili }e
me jadnog radije ovako, usred bolesti, odavde uzeti, pre no {to vedro nebo
ugledam, i pre no {to ranama lek privijem, `eqnog svetlosti usred no}i cr-
ne u toj no}i ko }e kukavnim pa}enicima pomo} pru`iti?! No, tamo gde
pomo} qudima postoji, tamo je re{ewe kona~no, tu povratka nema.

Nekada{wi jadi i nevoqe nisu ni prineti ovim sada{wim

Glava moja ve} je posedela i uko~eni udovi nagiwu ka smiraju `ivqewa
bolom ispuwenog. No, nikad dosad jo{ nisam takav i toliki bol trpeo, sva-
kako ne onda kad sam more vetrovima besnim uzburkano prelazio, na putu iz
Aleksandrije u zemqu Ahaju, /310/ po izlasku zimskog sazve`|a bika koga se
mornari najvi{e pla{e, i malo ih se usu|uju da u to vreme konopce odve`u.
64 ^elica Milovanovi}

Celih dvadeset no}i i dana tada sam na stra`wem delu la|e prele`ao, usrd-
nim molitvama zazivaju}i Boga visokovladara. Zapenu{ali talasi, kao pla-
nine ili stene okomite, prete}i su se prema la|i dizali, sad s jedne, sad s
druge strane, delimi~no se i na brod obru{avaju}i. Jedra su se tresla, silo-
viti vetar o{tro je zvi`dao kroz predwe konopce {to katarku dr`e. Nebo je
bilo prekriveno crnim oblacima, kroz oblake su muwe prosijavale, sa svih
strana tutwava stra{na je odjekivala. /320/ Tada sam sebe u potpunosti pre-
dao Bogu i tako sam na{ao spas iz podivqalog mora posle moga sve~anoga
obe}awa more se smirilo. Niti onda kad je {irom Jelade zemqotres udario,
i zemqa se do temeqa uzdrmala, a pomo}i niotkuda ne be{e; ja sam se tada
mnogo upla{io jer jo{ nisam bio upu}en, kroz kr{tewe vodom, u svete bla-
goslovene tajne nebesne a to privla~i na qude milost i vedrinu Duha ne-
beskog. Niti onda kad je bole{tina ispunila usta moja gadnom izlu~inom i
opasno suzila puteve kojima dah prolazi, to jest staze samoga `ivota. Niti
kad sam lakomisleno vrte}i vrbovu gran~icu /330/ slu~ajno posred srede
probu{io i raskrvavio o~ni kapak; svetlost mi je bila utrnula, kao da sam
nekoga ubio, i ta bolna povreda mnogo mi je drugog jada zadala rukama svo-
jim nisam smeo da Bogu prinosim `rtvu duhovnu sve dok suzama svojim nisam
ranu izle~io; ne~ist ~ovek da se dotakne svetiwa nije dobro, kao {to ne
vaqa ni da ~ovek golim okom u sunce jarko gleda. I jo{ mnogo {to {ta sam ja
prepatio ta, ko bi mogao da ispri~a sva iskustva, neka te{ka neka blago-
datna, kojima me je Bog k sebi prizvao!
Ali nikad jo{, velim, nikad nisam takva zla iskusio /340/ u kakva je
du{a moja nesre}na u posledwe vreme zapala, i zbog kojih `eqno o~ekuje da
joj svane dan slobode kad }e se od svega otrgnuti i u nagoti svojoj ute}i od
po`ara, i od neraskidivih stega `ivotnih, i od prete}e ~equsti a`daje koja
samo ~eka da svojim sna`nim vilicama sameqe sve ~ega se dohvati. Du{a je
moja hrana Belijaru 2 Kor. 6, 15. O, ko }e otvoriti izvor vode na licu mo-
me, pod kapcima o~nim, da potocima suza o~istim svu prqav{tinu, oplaku-
ju}i, kao {to i treba, pogre{ke svoje za smrtnike, kao i za du{e ne~iste,
suze su lek najboqi, /350/ suze i prah crni, na zemqi le`awe i ko{uqa od
kostreti; e, da bi svako ko mene gleda od straha uzdrhtao i sam sobom boqi
postao, i od crne ravnice misirske, od te{kog rada i ispod ruke cara Fara-
ona daleko pobegao i u svoju svetu domovinu se uputio Izlaz. 1112! I da
ne ostane kao zarobqenik na kamenitom tlu vavilonskom, na obali reke sede-
}i, obliven suzama, dok mu instrumenti muzi~ki netaknuti pored wega le`e
Ps. 137, nego da po`uri u granice svete zemqe, da pobegne od ropskog iga
asirskog {to ga je te{ko pritisnulo 2 Car. 17, i da svojim rukama polo`i
temeqe hrama velikoga! /360/ A ja, jadan, otkako sam tu svetu zemqu napustio,
bez prestanka za wom `udim. Od te{ke muke sam oronuo, ka zemqi se savijam,
bol u du{i se pove}ava, zazirem od qudi i od besmrtnoga Cara, pogru`en
sam u srcu i bedno obu~en, ne pu{tam glasa od sebe, bedom svojom izazivam
samilost Vladara, jer on je blag prema onima {to na zemqi le`e, a na gorde
i obesne ne obra}a pa`wu.
 Gregory of Nazianzuss De rebus suis 65

Pore|ewe sa pri~om o milostivom Samarjaninu

I kao kad su, prema pri~i Luk. 10, 3037, onog ~oveka koji silaza{e
iz svetoga grada Jerusalima do ~uvenog grada Jerihona nevaqali razbojnici
iz zasede napali /370/ i ne samo sramotno istukli i izranili, nego i odelo
sa wega skinuli i napola mrtva ga bezdu{no ostavili; malo posle tim putem
nai|o{e prvo Levit, pa onda sve{tenik, no i oni ga bezdu{no obi|o{e i tu
ga ostavi{e; a u neko doba nai|e jedan Samarjanin i sa`ali mu se, te ga sa so-
bom povede i rane mu previ, i lek za rane ostavi, kao i ne{to novca za ~oveka
da ga poneguje da ~uda li velikoga, kako mu se Samarjanin kad ga vide sa`a-
li, a oni od visoka i plemenita roda se ne sa`ali{e! A ja ba{ ne znam ta~no
{ta se sve iza ove pri~e krije, kakve tajne Bog u mudrosti svojoj prikriva.
/380/ No, neka mi to oprosti! Jer i ja sam u takve nevoqe zapao, i mene je na
isti na~in kad sam iz slavnoga grada silazio napao razbojnik koji du{e ne-
navidi, i milost Hristovu je sa mene strgao i nagog me ostavio, kao ono Ada-
ma po~etak pada i propasti, wega je isku{ewe na zemqu oborilo, na zemqu
iz koje je i potekao. Ali ti mi se smiluj, Vladaru, spasi od smrti mene koga
su sve{tenici ostavili kad su shvatili da sam u nevoqi; povij lepo rane
moje, povedi me u ku}u gostoqubivu, da me odatle zdravog i ~itavog po{a-
qe{ natrag u grad sveti /390/ e, da tamo na ~vrstim nogama prebivam! i
da daleko od mene odgurne{ nevaqale razbojnike, i putovawe mukotrpno, i
saputnike bezdu{ne koji se svojom pobo`no{}u ponose!

Pri~a o cariniku i Fariseju

Dva ~oveka, pri~a se Luk. 18, 1014, u|o{e u crkvu, jedan Farisej, sav
naduven kao da je od svih pred Bogom najboqi, i drugi carinik, pogru`en u
srcu svom zbog nepravedne dobiti; onaj pomiwa{e svoje postove, i desetak
{to pla}a{e po zakonu, i sebe sa starima pore|a{e, govore}i s prezrewem o
cariniku; a ovaj liju}i suze i u grudi se busaju}i /400/ ne {}a{e ni o~iju na
{iroko nebo, presto Boga velikoga, podignuti, nego o~i za zemqu prikivaju-
}i poizdaqe staja{e i ovako se moqa{e: Milostivi Bo`e, smiluj se sluzi
svome prepunom zla svakojaka! Mene ne}e spasti ni zakon, ni desetak, ni do-
bra dela ne la`e ovaj ovde {to se re~ima razbacuje. Stidim se i da pristu-
pim ne~istim nogama svojim hramu tvome. Da ho}e milost tvoja i sa`aqewe
kapnuti na mene nedostojnog! To je nada jedina koju si, Vladaru, pru`io bed-
nim gre{nicima. Tako wih dvojica govorahu. Bog ~u obojicu i sa`ali se na
ovoga /410/ {to ga vide kako se mu~i, a onoga {to se sam uzdiza{e, wega ne
usli{i. Tako si video i tako presudio, Bo`e, i time si i meni snagu ulio.
Tako sam i ja pred tobom kao taj gre{ni carinik {to te`e uzdi{em, sve se
ve}oj pomo}i nadam. I ako su ti ikad otac moj i gospo|a majka ~ast suzama
svojim i uzdisawem i molitvama ukazali, ili ti makar mali deo imovine
svoje na dar prineli, ili ti svetim i ~istim `rtvama po~ast odali jer ja
li~no nikad ni{ta dostojno tebe nisam postigao molim ti se, opomeni ih
se i meni u pomo} priteci; odagnaj zle brige, /420/ ne dopusti da me ~kaq
svojim bodqikavim izdancima pridavi niti da mi se u noge upli}e dok pu-
66 ^elica Milovanovi}

tem bo`anskim napred hodim, odbrano moja, sprovedi me neo{te}ena! Ja sam

sluga tvoj, ba{tina tvoja. Ti si Bog moj od samoga po~etka.

Molitva i zavet matere Grigorijeve

Tebi me je mati moja na dar prinela jo{ dok me je u utrobi nosila, onog
dana kada je u `eqi da mu{ko dete na kolenima podr`i, poput svete Ane ova-
ko prozborila 1 Sam. 1, 1018: O, da mi je da mu{ko ~edo ugledam, a ti,
Hriste vladaru, zadr`i plod trudova mojih u okolu svome!. Tako ona re~e, i
ti je, Bo`e, usli{i; zatim do|e onaj san bo`anski /430/ i ime joj donese, a
onda joj ti sina podari. Posle me ona, po zakonu tvome, prinese na dar kao
novog Samuila ako sam to ikad bio. A sad se brojim me|u lude i nevaqale
sinove ~asnog sluge tvoga Ilija 1 Sam. 2, 12; oni ~iste `rtve skrnavqahu u
bezumqu svome, pohlepnim rukama grabe}i iz sudova i lonaca bo`jih, i zato
te`ak kraj `ivota do~eka{e. No mati moja boqem se nadala, i zato je deo po-
roda svoga tebi posvetila; ruke moje ona je na svete bo`anske kwige polo`i-
la i zagrliv{i me ovim re~ima mi se obratila: /440/ Neko je ve} pre mene
priveo oltaru sina svog qubqenog, Bogom poklowenog, i `eqnog da u svetoj
`rtvi u~estvuje odli~an otac, odli~nog sina kasno ro|eno ~edo Sarino,
po~etak i koren loze budu}e, plod nade i obe}awa bo`jeg taj sve{tenik be-
{e Avram, a jagwe di~ni Isak tako dakle i ja, kao {to sam obe}ala, tebe,
dar `ivi, Bogu poklawam. Da mi ti ispuni{ nadu maj~insku! Jer ja sam tebe,
~edo, izmolila i sad se molim da se dostojnim poka`e{. To ti, sine, ~asno
nasle|e ostavqam, sada i ovde i sve do posletka. A {to je od posletka, to je
daleko najboqe.
/450/ To je mati moja `elela. Ja se jo{ kao dete priklonih wenima `e-
qama, i ne`na du{a po~e pokazivati znake pobo`nosti; sam Hristos postavi
na wu pe~at sigurnosni, jer on otvoreno sa mnom, slugom svojim, razgovara-
{e, on me usmeri ka devi~anstvu milome, plot moju zauzda i u meni podsta~e
`arku qubav prema mudrosti bo`anskoj i `ivotu mona{kom a to su prvi-
ne `ivota budu}eg gde nema ~e`we za telom, onim od rebra stvorenim, {to se
natrag telu svome privija i re~ima lukavim na gorko isku{ewe navodi, nego
je svaka `eqa ~ista Bogu upu}ena, jer je cela od Boga i potekla, /460/ i gde se
~ovek ne rastr`e izme|u `ene svoje i Hrista. A on je mene, i one boqe od me-
ne, uputio putawom tesnom, putawom bez povratka i te{ko prohodnom, ka
vratnicama uzanim kroz koja malo wih prolazi, vode}i mene, od zemqe na~i-
wenog, ka Bogu nero|enom, mene iz smrti do nepropadqivosti; i ne samo onaj
deo mene {to predstavqa obli~je Boga velikoga, nego i pomo}nika wegova,
telo i kosti ove on je za sobom povukao, kao {to magnetni kamen privla~i
gvo`|e usijano.

Na putu uzanom istrajati nije lako

Avaj meni jadnome! Avaj, du{o, {to si te{ke jade i nevoqe iskusila!
Avaj, smrtnici ni{tavni i razmetqivi! Uistinu, svi smo mi, koji smo od
majke ro|eni, kao vetri} lagan nepostojani, ili vetri} /470/ ili struja mor-
 Gregory of Nazianzuss De rebus suis 67

ska u tesnacu Egripskome {to stalno pravac mewa, tako se i mi po zemqi vr-
timo, i di~imo se uspesima svojim bezvrednim! Ni{ta u qudskome `ivotu
ne ostaje isto do svr{etka, ni zlo ni dobro. A putevi su wihovi tik jedan uz
drugi, pa niti r|av ~ovek zna gde }e na posletku zavr{iti, niti je dobrome
vrlina wegova doveka postojana, nego r|av{tinu strah ometa i sapiwe, a vr-
linu zavist. Tako je Hristos hteo da se rod qudski ~as ovamo, ~as onamo po-
vodi, e da bismo pogled uvis podizali i wegovu snagu uvi|ali. I najboqi je
onaj koji ravnim putem gredi /480/ i ne osvr}e se na pusti pepeo Sodoma {to
se zatre zbog bluda u ogwu nevi|enom, ve} `urno be`i na brdo visoko, daleko
od rodne grude, da ne bi kao slan kamen ostao za pri~u i nauk budu}im nara-
{tajima Post. 19.
A ja sa patwama mojim, `iv sam svedok nevaqal{tine qudske. Kad sam
bio dete, dok je u grudima tek samo malo pameti bilo, ja sam pa`qivo pratio
tu maju{nu senku razuma, po{tovao sam dobre obi~aje i lepo sam napredovao
sigurnim korakom du` puta carskog ka onom prestolu {to blista u visini.
Sada, pak, kad sam znawe izu~io i kad se kraju `ivota pribli`avam, /490/ ja
se jadan krivim putem teturam, nesiguran na nogama kao da sam se vina napio.
Umoran sam i ote`ao od stalne borbe sa zmijom vijugavom {to iz potaje, a i
otvoreno, vara i potkrada duh na svako dobro usredsre|en. U jednom trenutku
misli svoje Bogu okre}em, u slede}em sam opet uvu~en u zli vrtlog `ivotni;
ovaj svet prostrani je ve} veliki deo du{e moje o{tetio. No, ipak, iako sam
crnom i zlokobnom tamom okru`en, jer neprijateq moj svoj mra~ni otrov oko
mene razli, ba{ kao {to sipa morska ispod vode bquje, ipak ja jo{ toliko
imam razuma i uvida u ono {to je najva`nije, /500/ da znam ko sam i koliko je
daleko meta do koje `elim da dosko~im a gde, me|utim, jadan le`im jer se
na zemqu okliznuh, ili, boqe, ispod zemqe upadoh u bezdane dowe.
Meni nema leka ni utehe, ne povodim se za re~ima {to idu na voqu
zlim strastima, ne radujem se kad vidim koliko su drugi pokvareni, kao da
sam ja najboqi. Ta, zar je ikakvo zadovoqstvo ~oveku koji se previja od bola
od rane ma~em zadate, da vidi da se drugi rawenici jo{ te`e mu~e?! Ili ka-
kva je vajda nevaqalima od nevaqalstva onih {to su jo{ gori?! S druge stra-
ne, dobar ~ovek je na dobitku kad nai|e na boqeg od sebe, /510/ a isto tako i
r|av. Koji mo`e da vidi, slepima je od pomo}i. A zlim delima se radovati,
to je vrhunac nevaqal{tine. Jo{ kad neko vrhunskog nevaqalca dr`i za od-
li~nog ~oveka, to me jako boli, to je tuga skrivena u srcu mome. Boqe je da
odli~an ~ovek va`i za r|avog, nego da nevaqalac u`iva dobro ime, i od do-
broga pohvalu da prima, kao grob la`qivi {to iznutra smrdi od le{eva tru-
lih i plesnivih, a spoqa se blista sve`e okre~en i lepim bojama ofarban.
^uvajmo se od onog oka velikog {to vidi i pod zemqom, i u bezdanu
morskom, i {to god je u dubini /520/ uma qudskog. Vreme tu ni{ta ne zna~i,
pred Bogom je sve uvek prisutno. Pa kako bi se iko mogao nadati da svoje ne-
vaqalstvo sakrije?! I gde }emo se mi sami sakriti na dan suda?! I ko }e da
nas brani i zastupa?! Kako }emo izma}i oku bo`jem kad vatra o~istiteqna
po~ne da sudi i procewuje zasluge svakoga od nas, gutaju}i zlobu kao slamu i
68 ^elica Milovanovi}

plevu vazdu{astu. Od toga ja strepim i pla{im se i dawu i no}u, da u zlobu

i nevaqalstvo ne zapadnem, jer vidim kako mi du{a nekad samo Bogu okre-
nuta sad sve vi{e ka zemqi se spu{ta i u korak ide sa ovim prahom od koga
`eqah da uteknem.

Pore|ewe sa bujicom koja nosi i uni{tava neki stari platan

I kao kad brza matica nabujale reke svom silinom grune u obale i do
korena uni{ti neki stari /530/ platan bujnokosi, ili vitu omoriku, i prvo
mu sve `ile i korewe razlabavi i na samu ivicu ga nasadi dok jo{ tanke
`ilice za zemqu prijawaju , a onda ga strgne sa litice i tresne usred vr-
tloga uskovitlanog, uz tutwavu gromovitu, pa ga sobom povu~e i prepusti na
milost i nemilost hridinama; tu u mutqagu, bez prestanka {iban ki{om, on
trune i kao bedni patrqak nadomak obale le`i ba{ tako i moju du{u, dok
je jo{ cvetala qubavqu prema Hristu vladaru, /540/ stra{ni neprijateq `e-
stoko napade, na zemqu je obori i skoro sasvim uni{ti; ono malo {to je pre-
ostalo, to sad ovde onde bludi i potuca se. Do Boga je, ho}e li je opet na noge
uspraviti. On je nas stvorio, kad jo{ nismo postojali; on }e nas, kad se bu-
demo rasturili, opet sastaviti i u drugi `ivot prevesti da se suo~imo, neki
sa ogwem, neki sa Bogom isto~nikom svetlosti. Da li sa Bogom, i da li svi,
kona~no? O tom drugde.

Molitva za ozdravqewe telesno i duhovno

Hriste vladaru, ako me zli qudi i zovu mrtvacem i kukavicom, i iz po-
taje mi se rugaju, i vrte}i glavom mome jadu i bedi se smeju, /550/ ti nemoj
dopustiti da me ruke wihove u borbi savladaju; najpre me u~vrsti opet u na-
dama nebesnim, a onda u du{u moju uga{enu kani malu kapqu uqa, da pod-
stakne svetlo u svetiqci o`edneloj, da se plamen opet digne i procveta sve-
tlost obnovqena, te da se udostojim `ivota u svetlosti. Drugo, i{~upaj iz
mene o, da mi je da lak{e prodi{em! i pusti da vihor odnese sve muke i
nevoqe kojima si sasvim ukrotio srce moje; ne znam da li to ka`wava{ moje
grko nevaqalstvo, ili mo`da poku{ava{ da me kao `drepca ukroti{ bolnim
udarcima /560/ i gone}i me po stazama vrletnim i neprohodnim; ili ho}e{
da zauzda{ neku nadutost duha moga biva to, da qudi blago~estivi ali ne
mnogo ozbiqni, od dobroga Boga zlu razmetqivost pokupe; ili, pak, `eli{, o
Slovo spasonosno!, da moje nevoqe za nauk rodu smrtnome ponudi{, da zamr-
ze nevaqalstvo u `ivotu, jer `ivot je ovaj nepostojan i svima nevoqe dono-
si, dobrima kao i nevaqalima, i da se {to pre okrenu `ivotu drugome, onom
trajnom, {to se ne rastura, i {to ga blago~estivi zovu `ivotom boqim.
No, svako dobro i zlo, /570/ sve {to smrtnicima za nauk slu`i u `ivo-
tu prevrtqivom, sve je to deo mudrosti preduboke; kroz tebe, Slovo, sve na
dobro biva, makar mi ni{ta i ne razumeli u zadriglosti uma na{ega. Ti mu-
dro rukuje{ kormilom svemira, upravqa{ ga tamo i ovamo, i usmerava{ plo-
vidbu na{u preko {irokog uzburkanog mora i izme|u prete}ih hridi ovog
nepouzdanog `ivota. A ja, evo, bolan i `alostan, i svakakvim nevoqama op-
 Gregory of Nazianzuss De rebus suis 69

hrvan, kolena svoja tebi priklawam. Po{qi {to pre Lazara, da ovla`enim
prstom osve`i jezik moj od vatre osu{en, da me bezdan ne proguta, /580/ da me
Avram ne izbaci iz velikog krila svoga mene prebogatog u patwama Luk.
16, 1931! Pru`i ruku svoju svemo}nu, daj leka od bolesti, poka`i na meni
mo} ~udesa i znamewa, kao nekad! Reci ne{to, i te~ewe krvi neka namah pre-
stane Mar. 5, 2529. Reci, i neka duh legeona mahnitog u krdo sviwa u|e i u
more upadne, daleko ga bilo Mar. 5, 213! Odagnaj od mene gubu ru`nu
Mat. 8, 14, daj da svetlost prodre u o~i moje {to ne vide, i da u{i moje
zvuk poslu{aju Mar. 8, 2226; Mat. 11, 5; 15, 30; podigni ruku moju usahlu,
smrvi lance kojima je jezik moj okovan, /590/ u~vrsti hod nogu mojih osla-
bqenih Luk. 6, 611; 1, 64. Koricom hleba me nasiti; umiri more uzburka-
no Mar. 6, 4651, zasijaj od sunca sjajniji. Oja~aj udove ote`ale, vaskrsni
mrtvaca usmrdelog Mat. 11, 5; Jov. 11, 44. Nemoj mene, besplodnog, kao smo-
kvu onu na prvi pogled osu{iti Mar. 11, 1214.
Razni qudi, Hriste, u razli~ita se pomagala uzdaju, neki u krv svoju i
poreklo, neki u prah telesni, neki u ponos i uspeh kratkotrajan, neki, opet,
`ude za drugom kakvom pomo}u ni{tavnom; ja jedini okrenut sam tebi jed-
nom, o Caru nad carevima! /600/ Ti svime upravqa{, ti si meni snaga najve-
}a. Jer nema meni bri`ne supruge, da jade neizle~ive rastera i da me u `alo-
sti ute{nim re~ima okrepi; nema dece mile, da se wima ponosim deca su
~oveku oslonac u starosti, wihovim mladim stopama on put svoj nastavqa;
nema bra}e i sestara, nema prijateqa, da u wima u`ivam. Brata i sestru od-
nela je zlosre}na sudbina; prijateqi moji, mirnog `ivota qubiteqi, drhta-
li su na najmawu opasnost koja bi drugome zapretila; to mi je sva radost bi-
la kao jelenu `ednom kad se na|e blizu izvora vode hladne jer to su bili
qudi odli~ni, /610/ hristonosivi, koji su plot prevazi{li jo{ dok su na ze-
mqi `iveli, prijateqi Duha iskonskog, bogoslu`iteqi ~estiti, neo`ewe-
ni, od sveta odvojeni. Ali i oni se sad sukobqavaju po tvom pitawu, jedan je
zauzeo ovakav stav, drugi onakav, i preterana revnost u veri raskinula je po-
verewe i sklad me|usobne qubavi od koje sad samo ime ostade. To je kao kad
~ovek prvo utekne nekako od lava, pa naleti na podivqalu me~ku, no i wu
uspe da izbegne, pa onda sav sre}an u ku}u svoju uleti i rukom se na zid na-
sloni, a odatle neo~ekivano isko~i zmija i ujede ga, /620/ tako i mene pat-
we bezbrojne opsedaju i nema mi leka niotkuda, {to god da prona|em, jo{ je
gore i bolnije. Na sve strane sam gledao, u svakakvim okolnostima sam se pa-
tio, no, opet, Bla`eni, od tebe sam krenuo i ka tebi opet pogled okre}em, od-
brano moja, svedr`itequ, nero|eni, ti si po~etak i otac po~etka sina be-
smrtnoga, svetlosti velike od ~iste svetlosti {to se preliva iz jednoga u
jedno, a {to se re~ima ne da iskazati! Sine bo`ji, mudrosti, caru, slovo,
istino, sliko lika prvobitnog, prirodo jednaka roditequ svome, pastiru,
jagwe, `rtvo, bo`e, ~ove~e, arhijereju! /630/ Du{e, koji od oca ishodi{, sve-
tlosti uma na{ega, koji ~iste pose}uje{ i ~oveka bogom ~inis, smiluj se i
daj da u godinama koje dolaze i ovde i u budu}em `ivotu u~estvujem u sveko-
likom bo`anstvu i da te kroz pesmu tebi prijatnu u radosti slavim.