Force of Gravity

Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://archiveofourown.org/works/40134231.

Rating: Mature
Archive Warning: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of
Violence
Category: M/M
Fandom: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Relationship: Will Byers/Mike Wheeler
Character: Mike Wheeler, Will Byers, Eleven | Jane Hopper, Maxine "Max"
Mayfield, Lucas Sinclair, Steve Harrington, Eddie Munson, Chrissy
Cunningham, Dustin Henderson, Robin Buckley, Jason Carver, Joyce
Byers, Jonathan Byers
Additional Tags: Slow Burn, Slow Build, Alternate Universe - High School, Lead Singer
Mike Wheeler, Protective Mike Wheeler, Mike Wheeler Loves Will
Byers, Sad Will Byers, Mike Wheeler Needs a Hug, Romance, Drama,
Football Captain Will Byers, Teenage Drama, Angst, Fluff and Humor,
Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Forbidden Love, Opposites
Attract, Background Relationships, Hurt Will Byers, Hurt Mike Wheeler,
Mike Wheeler Is Soft for Will, Love Confessions, Chrissy Cunningham
Lives, mentions of abuse, Past Child Abuse, Traumatized Will Byers,
Mike Wheeler is a Little Shit, Mike Wheeler is Amazing, Strangers to
Friends to Lovers, Found Family, No Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending,
Will actually hates football plot twist, Artist Will Byers, Modern AU,
Abuse, Blood and Injury, Mike Wheeler Being an Idiot, Will Byers
Deserves Love, Happy Ending, Unreliable Narrator Mike Wheeler,
Unreliable Narrator Will Byers, Unreliable POVs
Language: English
Stats: Published: 2022-07-07 Completed: 2022-11-21 Words: 170,879
Chapters: 46/46

Force of Gravity
by oceanfruit

Summary

Will loved ordinary things, an uneventful existence was something he craved. Sadly, when
Mike Wheeler walks into his life, Will’s easy going path snaps right in half. A passion he
could never imagine overtaking his whole being.

It was too bad their friend groups hated each other and his sister had a huge crush on the
musician. Off limits.

Fantastic.

*please do not repost this story on any other platforms*

*please do not post this story on wattpad*
 Chapter 1
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Growing up, the world had always been one-sided. In comparison to most, Will never minded the
simplicity of daily life. Years of finding where to shove himself made the ease feel like a finally
touchable dream.

Senior year felt highly anticipated, but the morning of the first day of school was vexingly normal.
Maybe there was too much animation put on the idea of one last year of high school. While Will
sat slumped over a bowl of cereal, he was realizing that might just be the case.

"Will, honey, I'm not going to be home tonight until late, so if you need anything just shoot me a
text alright?"

Leaning over, Will let her kiss his cheek, "alright, have a good day, mom."

"You too, baby-- oh, and please make sure Jane is awake."

"I will, now go you're already late."

She sent him an overdramatic wave, "alright, alright I'm going!"

He watched as she quickly stumbled out the front door. It was a regular occurrence, Joyce Byers
was rarely ever on time. The house went quiet for a few moments and he basked in the
peacefulness of it.

Looking over at the clock, he let out a sigh, "Jane!" Waiting, he tuned his ears in, trying to hear
any signs of rustling, "Jane--"

"What!" She retorted. Before Will could counter back, she walked into the kitchen with a look of
annoyance gracing her features, "do I look stupid?"
"No, you look normal--" Jane came over and flicked his head, "ow! What? You do, that's not a bad
thing."

"I mean do I look good? If I show up looking like a frump then I'll set a pattern for the year."

He raised a brow in question, her logic never seemed to be reasonable, "no one is going to
remember or care about what you wore the first day of school. You do look good, stop worrying
about it."

"Did Mom already leave?" Jane asked, easily moving on from the conversation.

Will stood and scrubbed his bowl, placing it in the dishwasher, "yeah a few minutes-- shit!" He
cursed loudly as the top rack fell, "I just fixed this a few days ago."

"We need a new one."

"Yeah well we can't get a new one."

Jane shrugged, agreeing but not giving anything else to the conversation. Will carefully picked up
the broken rack and placed it on the counter, feeling guilty over the idea of telling his mom yet
another thing in their house was broken.

"Do you think I should join cheerleading or something this year?" Jane asked, a spoon full of
yogurt hanging out of her mouth, "reinvent myself?"

"Ask Chrissy, maybe she'll give you lessons," Will said, walking over to his backpack and picking
it up, already grimacing at the uncomfortable weight.

Jane groaned dramatically, "no that's the worst, she'll know I suck and still be like, 'it's okay! you're
doing great!' I do not need to be patronized."

He let out a snort of amusement, "then join chess club instead."

The brown-haired girl rolled her eyes, throwing away the yogurt cup and grabbing her backpack as
well. Will pulled his keys out of the bowl by the door, praying that the car would actually start.

"Maybe I'll just follow you around instead," Jane muttered, slouching into the passengers seat.

"That's really awkward because I've actually been following you around--"

Jane scoffed, "oh shut up, you've got the whole...thing going for you, football captain and
everything, but oh no that couldn't be enough. You also have to be an amazing artist with a soft
spot that acts like a little puppy--"

He flushed, "what has got you so bitter this morning?"

"Mom woke me up by doing the light flickering thing."

Will smiled, almost yelling in triumph when the the sad engine roared to life. The beginning of
their drive was filled with silence, Will assumed Jane was also attempting to get ready for the long
day ahead of them. He had always enjoyed school, not that he really let anyone know that. As far
as the outside world was aware, no one knew of his most intimate interests. Will had been drawing
for as long as he could remember, but didn't want many people to see the side of him, it was like
they'd be staring into his open heart.

"You have practice today?" Jane asked as they grew closer to the school.

He sent her a guilty smile, "yeah sorry, Chrissy doesn't though so you can just ride with her."

"I'll ask her, but if not can I take the car?"

Will pulled into the parking lot, trying to focus on not hitting anyone, "you only have your temps,
Jane, that's illegal."

"I wouldn't get caught, mom says I'm getting really good too."
He rolled his eyes, "don't care, I'm not getting in trouble just so you don't have to wait here. Ask
Chrissy, you know she'll say yes."

"I know, that's why I feel bad."

"She lives right by us--"

"Byers!"

He barely got a foot out of the door before he was being tackled into a hug. Stumbling back, Will
reached up and patted Lucas on the back.

"I see you're excited," he said, not at all phased by the extreme amount of affection shown by his
best friend.

Lucas smiled, "well it's always a gift to see the Byers siblings, how you doing Jane?"

A part of Will's heart warmed, out of everyone Lucas had always been the most sensitive with Jane.
They shared a lot of the same friends now, but growing up Jane used to have a hard time getting to
know people and coming out of her shell, through all of it Lucas had always been there.

"Fine, but it just hit me that we have to be here everyday for a year," she muttered.

"It'll be a grand affair," Lucas said in a terribly loud voice, "have any of you seen Steve yet?"

Will shrugged as they walked into the crowded school, trying his best not to run into anyone. The
hallway was spilling over with people, making it nearly impossible for him to see where he was
going. Staying to the side, he listened to the surface-level conversation Jane and Lucas had engaged
themselves in.

"No, no Steve I am not doing that, don't even get me started on that shit--"

"Henderson, it's a tackle, you have to at least try."

They made it to their table in the cafeteria, and before they even got in eyesight range, he could
already hear Steve and Dustin arguing loudly with one another. Will rolled his eyes at their
dramatics and sat down. Throughout highschool their group had morphed perfectly together, a mix
of different personalities making it feel like a family to him.

"Will listen to this, I shouldn't have to worry about this right? I'll be benched all season," Dustin
asked, smacking his shoulder.

"I don't know, I won't say that, you're getting really good--"

Dustin let out a huff of disbelief, "come on Byers, you don't need to be nice, give me the answer I
want so Steve will leave me alone."

"Oh come on, I'm trying to be a good friend--"

"Too bad you're just an annoying jackass instead."

Will looked over at them, "alright guys calm down, it's only eight in the morning."

"Hey guys!" Chrissy walked up to them, her usual wide smile plastered on. For years people had
described the blonde girl as a walking bubble of sunshine, Will never understood how that so
perfectly encapsulated her.

"Chris, can you drive me home today?" Jane asked.

"Of course! I don't start practice or anything until next week," she sat down next to Jane, "alright
guys, guess what we're doing Friday?"

"Staying home--"

"No," Lucas said, cutting him off. Will slumped in defeat.

"Come on Will, we're doing something fun! We're going to this party I heard about, literally
everyone is going to be there," she paused, "but before you guys freak out, Venus Panic is playing--
"

"Nope, no we are not associating with those assholes," Steve said quickly, throwing his hands up
as if it was the most extreme suggestion. The other's quickly agreed, but Will just sat there, sending
Chrissy a tiny little smile as she looked at him pleadingly.

"It could be fun," he said, staying timid.

Lucas looked at him with his mouth dropped open, "you're kidding! Will no, those guys are the
worst."

"We're not going to have to talk to them."

Chrissy nodded, "yeah! I mean, it's a concert, so many people are going to be there--"

"Nope, no, absolutely not," Dustin said firmly.

After that, the conversation faded out, but Will couldn't ignore how upset Chrissy looked at being
shot down. The other's seemed to ignore it, but as the bell rang, Will hung back a bit so he could
catch her.

"Hey," he said softly, walking close as they moved to their first class, "I'm sorry about that."

She huffed, "it's fine, but they're so annoying you know? Like, I get they don't get along with those
guys and Steve has his whole thing, but it's such a dramatic rivalry."

Will couldn't help but agree with that, "I'll go with you, how about that?"

A huge smile pinched her face immediately, "really?"

"Yeah, I mean, if they're going to be assholes we can just sneak out, it'll be a little secret."
She hugged his arm excitedly, "you're the best, Will."

Just like Lucas, Chrissy had been a staple in his life from a young age. They met at an art camp in
middle school and latched onto each other, she had always been one of his best friends, one of the
only people he could truly confide in. Seeing her upset about their friends response to her idea was
enough to make him go out of his comfort zone.

"Okay, but you can't let them know, they would kill us."

She snorted out a laugh, "I know, oh my god, could you imagine?"

They made their way into math, and Will really questioned their luck on how they got the worst
subject first period.

"God, you better let me cheat off you this year," Chrissy muttered as they sat in the back of the
class.

"I'm not good at math either, so we're just going to fail."

People started to file into the class, but Will didn't pay them any mind. Jane was right, having to be
in class every single day for hours on end was finally hitting him. It wasn't the worst, but just the
idea of sitting in uncomfortable chairs with his head bent forward over a worksheet sounded like
torture.

"Have you actually ever talked with people in...well, you know," Chrissy asked, leaning over to
whisper in his ear.

He shook his head, "no, barely even know who they are, Steve and Lucas make sure of that."

"What do you think even happened?"

Will glanced around the room, "Steve, he had a thing with the guy who plays drums, Eddie,
apparently things didn't end well. After that they had this whole fight and now Steve dragged all of
us into it. I try and ignore everything."

She nodded in understanding, "well, guess we'll have to see for ourselves what they're like."

"Guess so."

"Alright class! I'm going to start off by saying we're not doing any introductions or slow days, there
is a lot to cover this year so lets jump right into it," the teacher said, walking in with a stern and
grim look plastered on her face.

Chrissy leaned towards him, "we're so screwed."

--------

"Will! Are you trying to kill us?"

He laughed, bending over and trying to catch his breath, "come on, Lucas, it's not that bad--"

"Not that bad? Six laps isn't that bad? And in the heat too!"

Rolling his eyes, Will pulled his shirt up in attempt to wipe away the moisture that was rolling
down his face. Unlike most, he actually enjoyed sweating, it was somewhat therapeutic.

"Well it's over now so stop whining about it, besides, you need to get back in shape," he said
cheekily, walking by and patting Lucas on the shoulder.

"Byers you're a little shit, you know that?" Steve trotting over, hair falling in front of his eyes, "this
is why I should be captain, I would never--"

"Oh shut up Steve, your ego is too big to handle that," Lucas said.
Will sat down on the bench, taking a sip of water and checking the time. The day had been long
and he was ready to get home, a lot of the team had already scattered, leaving the second they were
allowed to.

"Gotta go, mom wants me home," Lucas said, walking by and picking up his bag, "see you
tomorrow?"

"See you," he said. After everyone had left, Will went around picking up the left over cones, using
the silence to find peace of mind. The day had been hectic and he was just happy it was finally
coming to an end. Getting used to the shift from summer to the school year had always been
difficult, the days taking out pints of energy.

Throwing a baseball cap on backwards, attempting to keep the hair out of his face, he made his
way to the parking lot. It was mostly empty, only a few cars scattered around. Will meandered to
his car and was about to get in when something caught his attention. Pausing, he looked over,
something drawing his attention to the other side of the parking lot.

Will recognized him, it was impossible not to. He didn't know his name, but felt an itch inside to
quickly figure it out.

The boy was leaning against -what Will assumed to be- his motorcycle, a cigarette hanging out of
his mouth. He seemed lost in thought, which was good since Will most definitely looked like a
creep.

He was -metaphorically- dark, that was the best way Will could describe it. His hair fell with
uncontrolled black curls, casting a shadow on his features. Will couldn't see much of the taller
boy's face, but couldn't help but wonder about every detail of him. He wore dark washed jeans,
black boots, a tight white t-shirt with a flannel over it. A effortless look that deftly grabbed Will's
attention. The slowly falling sun casted on him, making it easy for Will to see the other boy's hands
that were covered in gleaming rings, wrists holding a fair amount of bracelets. He looked like a
rock star, but in a much softer sense. Their was a roughness about him that could still be brushed
right out, leaving a pulchritudinous beauty that could whisk away anyone's attention.

Will quickly snapped his eyes away when the dark-haired guy began to turn his head to him. He
cleared his throat and practically fell into the car, embarrassed to think he might have gotten
caught. Driving off, Will kept his gaze forward, cursing himself for how his cheeks stayed heated.

He didn't dare look towards the boy's direction again, easily missing the sharp gaze that followed
him right out of the parking lot.
Chapter End Notes

This story is extremely dramatic for my own amusement, just a warning. Also, these
first few chapters probably feel somewhat slow because I had no idea what I was
doing yet and honestly never thought anyone would read this. This story wasn’t edited
like at all and really is just supposed to be for fun, so don’t take anything too serious
because really it wasn’t edited once lol. Thanks!

Also, a big thing I want to emphasize in this story is that I was playing around a lot
with kind of like drastic POV unreliability and making the characters perspectives
really outline their thoughts and kind of how they might make things up. Really I’ve
struggled in the past with how to give internal monologuing personality and have is
display what I want, so this was just me messing around. So the way Mike is described
from Will’s POV (hopefully) changes and evolves the more they get to know
eachother and at the beginning is very off and the same thing goes for Mike. So the
way they see eachother or things aren’t fact, it’s just them making stuff up with the
limited info they have. So people tend to think Mike is a ‘bad boy’ at the start or
something and he’s really not meant to be, Will is just viewing Mike in a very
dramatized way to kind of show the crush developing. Thank you! Hope this wasn’t
confusing.
 Chapter 2

The first week was simultaneously the longest while also not surpassing a blink. Will was honored
to be given the title of captain, but the job was exhausting, though he would never let Steve or
Lucas find out about that. As Friday rolled around, Will was jittery with nerves, he'd never been a
very good liar, especially when it came to close friends. All he could do was remind himself that he
was doing it for Chrissy and she had earned his silence.

Throughout the day, Will had many times where he almost backed out, but upon seeing his blonde
friend's bright smile he didn't have it in him. While they were sitting at lunch, things began to get
difficult.

"So, what are we doing tonight?" Dustin asked, mouth full of turkey.

Will grimaced, "please swallow before talking."

Rolling his eyes, Dustin dramatically did so, "there you go Byers, now, what are we doing tonight?
First Friday of senior year."

"We could go to a movie or some shit," Steve said.

Nervously, Will glanced over at Chrissy, hoping she could get them out of it. The younger girl sent
him a wink before turning to the rest of the group.

"I'm actually not feeling super great today, think it might just be something I ate last night. I don't
know, I think I'm fine but I don't want to risk it."

Lucas looked over at her concerned, "you puking? Do you need someone to stay with you? Your
mom is out of town, right?"

Chrissy kicked his leg, "oh! I can stay with you tonight."

"That would actually be great, thanks."

Will let out a short breath of relief when everyone easily bought the lie. That fixed two problems,
and now he just had to hope no one would catch them. While Dustin, Lucas, and Steve were
oblivious, Jane was going to be a whole different story.

Lunch winded down, and Will stayed close to Chrissy's side, that same itching nervousness coming
back up when thinking about his nosey sister.

"Hey, what are we going to tell Jane?"

"What do you mean?"

He sighed, "she's going to know something is up, Chris."

Chrissy's lips pressed into a tight line, "shit you're right...if she finds out she'll rat on us too. Okay,
after school I'll text you and say I'm feeling really sick and ask you to come over and bring
medicine. Jane hates seeing people get sick, there's no way she'll ask to come along."

"Okay, that could work, but I'm a terrible liar..." Will bit the inside of his cheek, shoving his hands
into the front pockets of his jeans.

"You'll be fine, you can also just text her if she's not in the living room or anything. Will, you're
thinking too much into this, it's going to be just fine."

"Alright, but if we do get caught I am putting all the blame on you."

She laughed warmly, nudging their shoulder's together, "and I'll happily take it. I gotta go, Spanish
quiz."

Will sent her a wave, still stuck in his head as he made it towards his next class. He had always
been surprised about how easy it was to jump into routine, his body already knowing where to
move without him having to give it a thought. Unfortunately, keeping his head down meant if
something -or someone- didn't move accordingly, he could easily lose his footing.
A surprised gasp slipped past his lips when he slammed into someone's chest, barely getting a
chance to look up before a hand was coming out and pushing his shoulder.

"What the hell Byers? Too good to actually look where you're going?"

Eddie Munson.

He took a step back, a chill running up his spine as the long-haired drummer sent him a glare,
irritation displayed on his features.

"You football shits are too stuck in your heads to pay attention to you're surroundings?" Eddie
continued, obviously waiting for him to answer.

Will cleared his throat, looking around at the eyes glancing at them, "uh sorry, I-I didn't mean--"

"Whatever, Byers," Eddie grumbled out, briskly walking past him and knocking their arms together
in the process.

He blushed with embarrassment, Will had only ever been in the background during, what they all
called, 'Steve and Eddie showdowns', so he didn't appreciate the confrontation. Will hated to admit
it, but he despised the idea of people not liking him, no matter how shallow that sounded.

With his mood now severely dampened, he made his way to English, slinking into the back with
his mind now occupied.

--------

By the time the school day ended, Will had practiced his lie more times than he could count. The
idea of disappointing Chrissy by not being able to pull it off and the guilt of lying to Jane was all
consuming. Will knew it was ridiculous, they were just going to a concert that no one else was
interested in attending, but that did nothing to rid the pit deep in his stomach.

Currently, he was sat in his room, grey and blue henley, a pair of jeans, and converse on. Will tried
to look presentable while also not raising any suspicion. Not that it was hard, his sense of style was
lacking heavily, but it was comfortable and he decided that's what mattered. When his phone went
off, the text from Chrissy telling him she was ready, Will was sure he was about to vomit.

He walked into the living room, cursing when he saw Jane sitting there watching TV.

"Hey Jane, Chrissy feels really sick, throwing up and everything. I'm gonna go get some medicine
for her," he rushed out fingers crossed tightly behind his back as she looked over at him, her eyes
slightly narrowed.

Will was waiting for the ball to drop. One, two, three--

"Okay," Jane said, slouching back down and not paying him an ounce of attention. Will was
seconds away from throwing his arms up in triumph, so swiftly, he grabbed his keys and left the
house, letting out a breath of relief.

The drive to Chrissy's house was only about five minutes, and before he knew it, he was coming
into view of the suburban neighborhood. A smile twitched onto his lips when he saw the blonde
girl sitting on the porch, practically bouncing with excitement.

"Hey!" Chrissy hopped into the passenger's seat, "how'd it go?"

"Good, she didn't even question it."

"See? Told you, Jane won't step anyway near puke."

Will laughed and pulled out of the driveway, a weight having been lifted off his shoulders: "hey,
guess who I ran into today?"

"Who?"

"Eddie Munson."

Her mouth dropped open in shock, "you're kidding? What did he say?"
"He was pretty pissed, probably just cause it was me. I didn't really know what to say...I mean,
why did Steve have to drag all of us into this?"

Chrissy shrugged, "don't know, but the other's have really bought into it, and the rest of the football
team. Personally, I think it's completely ridiculous. Last year I was in science with Robin, you
know the pianist? And we actually got along alright, she seemed nice, we didn't actually talk
much, but there was no 'spawn of Satan' in her that's for sure."

"Who um...who are the other members?" He asked, trying to sound casual.

"Max Mayfield, she's the redhead that always skates to school, think she plays bass, then there's
Robin and Eddie obviously. Mike Wheeler is the lead singer and guitarist, I don't know anything
about him really, other than the fact that people seem to like him," she said with a snort of
amusement, "I mean, I get it, he's seriously so beautiful. I think he might be some nerd. kind of
reminds me of you...but like the completely opposite side of the spectrum."

"What do you mean?"

"Don't really know...Heather described it well, said it was like a 'moon and sun' situation. Everyone
can just...pick a side based on their preferences, you're the lovable dog boyish one, and Wheeler is
like a...mysterious black cat type. I don't know, really it's all a bunch of bullshit, but that's what
people spend their time talking about. Anyway, that's the whole band."

Will's mind was reeling and he knew they needed to get away from the topic, "are they any good?"

"You haven't actually heard them before?" She asked in shock, he shook his head. "Oh my god,
Will, I know Steve shits on them a lot, but they're really good. Like, shockingly good. You'll see,
it'll be fun."

He could only nod, eyes trained on the road as they grew closer to the venue.

When they arrived, he was surprised to see how big the place looked. From first glance, it was easy
to determine it was an abandoned garage or warehouse, big enough to hold hoards of people.
"Just park right there," Chrissy said, pointing to a tiny spot on the side of the road. Will sighed, but
did as he was told, almost ripping his hair out by the time he actually got the car parked.

"That was torture," he whined as they walked towards the building.

"Oh stop it, it was a good spot," she threaded their arms together and practically skipped ahead.
Will was surprised about how many people were filing inside, it was like the entire school was
there and then some.

"Holy shit..."

"See? Told you."

Will made sure to hold onto Chrissy, not wanting to risk losing her somewhere in the crowd. She
was much better about pushing through people to get to where she wanted, Will tended to just let
everyone slam right into him and then he proceeded to apologize for it. An embarrassing affair.

The garage was dark, most of the lights coming from the empty stage. Somehow, they managed to
get pretty close, off to the left side. He folded his arms together and looked around, paranoid that
anyone would recognize them and -somehow- know they weren't supposed to be there.

"You look so tense, it's fine, just relax," Chrissy said, sending him a reassuring smile.

"Sorry, I just don't want to anyone to give us crap or something."

She patted his shoulder, "it'll be fine-- oh look, I think it's starting soon."

He glanced up, realizing the lights were dimming and rustling could be heard right behind the
stage. Will was still in shock about how filled the large space was, now realizing that the band had
more of an influence than he had originally thought.

As the group walked onto stage, people began cheering in excitement, but Will used that time to
take in each member. Max had long red hair that complimented her perfectly, a AC/DC T-shirt on
that looked torn up and worn, but fit her nicely. Robin had a short-brown cut and a pair of
suspenders on, Will hadn't seen anyone wear those for ages but decided it fit her. Eddie looked the
same as he always did, crazed hair and leather jacket never amiss.

Then there was Mike, he looked almost the same as the other day, jeans and boots still in place,
now wearing a much bigger flannel, the first few buttons undone and showing the necklace gracing
his collarbone. His hair was like a halo of dark curls, making his sharp features really stand out,
causing Will think he might have been sculpted by some kind of god. Or maybe Mike reminded
him more of sleeping beauty, Will wouldn't quite but a finger on it.

"You okay?"

Will quickly looked to his side, seeing the concerned stare Chrissy was sending him, "what? Yeah
of course."

"Alright, you just zoned out there for a second."

He held his arms close, "right, sorry."

Before Chrissy could pry any farther, Robin walked to the microphone, a happy smile on her face.

"Hey everyone! Thanks for coming out!" She said excitedly, waving out at the crowd in a way Will
found pretty adorable.

Everyone cheered loudly, obviously feeling the same way he did. Chrissy grabbed his arm in
excitement, and Will wondered how long she had been fighting the urge to go to one of these
concerts. A sense of guilt hit him thinking about how he might have ignored those signs. Robin
went on a little tangent before stepping away from the microphone, going back to the keyboard.
The room went pretty silent as Mike stepped up, and Will felt his stomach tightening in
anticipation.

The second Mike's long fingers moved across the strings of his guitar, Will was hooked.
Everything started off with a bang and he looked to Chrissy with wide eyes and she nodded
quickly, obviously happy that she proved her point.

"I see nothing in your eyes, and the more I see the less I like..."
Mike's voice was low and smooth, moving around the room and locking each person into a trance.
There was such a control that Will could never imagine someone having. He stared, not being able
to tear his eyes away from the natural born performer.

"I know nothing of your kind and I won't reveal your evil mind is it over yet?"

Will found his eyes examining Mike's face, surprised by how calm he looked. The song was
intense and completely overtaking the room, but the singer didn't seem affected by the loud crowd
or booming instruments.

"So sacrifice yourself and let me have what's left I know that I can find the fire in your eyes..."

He let out a shaky breath, feeling a sense of hypnosis take over every inch of him. Maybe it was
because he'd never actually seen live music play before. Will ignored the people bouncing and
screaming around him, still having his arms pulled tight around him in an awkward manner.
Crowds really had never been his thing, that was a fact, but in that moment he was just captivated,
not wanting to pull his gaze away.

Maybe Will had put some sort of power behind his entranced stare; because those dark eyes he
hadn't been able to get a glimpse of scanned the crowd, finding Will and looking directly at him.
His heart moved right into his throat, an addicting chill skimming over every part of his skin. Even
in the dim light Will could see the piercing gaze staring right into him.

"You take the breath right out of me..."

Will felt his lips part, stomach dunking and coming back up for air over and over again. It was only
a mere second, but as the soft lyrics came from Mike's mouth, Will saw the singer's eyebrows
twitch together, and then Mike quickly snapped his head forward again, which felt unnatural for
how elegant the taller boy proved to be.

He stood there unmoving, heart pounding so loud Will could barely even hear the music anymore.
With a stuttering gasp, he gazed down at the ground, willing his pulse to calm down. That was
nothing, there was no way the curly-headed guy could even see him. Though, it sure looked like he
could.

"You gotta fight just to make it through 'cause I will be the death of you..."
The song eventually ended and Will winched away from the loud screaming, his head now
pounding.

"That was amazing! Did you like it?" Chrissy asked tugging on his arm.

Will sent her a tight smile, "yeah! Yeah it was great."

"Hey, you okay? You look really flushed..."

That didn't seem to help his blush at all, "I'm fine, Chris. We should probably go though...in case
someone sees us."

Chrissy sighed, but reluctantly nodded, "yeah, but we are coming back to one of these okay?"

"Yeah...yeah sounds good."

Will guided her away from the crowd, skin prickling with goosebumps. Now that he knew what
those eyes felt like on him, Will was sure he would never forget it. He had gained a knew skill that
night, and it was detecting whenever Mike Wheeler was staring at him.

Fuck.
 Chapter 3

"Did you talk to Eddie?"

Will jumped, eyes lifting from the book in his hand. He glanced around the library nervously
before glancing up at Steve who looked much too serious for the situation.

"What are you talking about?"

Steve sat across from him, "some sophomore told me you two 'got into it' in the hall on Friday,
why didn't you tell me?"

"Because we didn't Steve, I wasn't watching where I was going an accidently ran into him--"

"You mean he ran into you."

Will rolled his eyes, "Steve, it's not even a big deal."

"Was he a dick about it?"

"I-- well it's not--"

Steve let out a scoff and leaned back in his chair, obviously radiating with anger. Will cursed
himself for not being a better liar.

"Those shit heads, if he bothers you again, you tell me okay? They don't get to walk all over you."

"Steve it's fine, I can take care of myself," he said, fidgeting with the edges of his book.

The elder boy sighed, "look Byers, I know you can, but you don't have to okay? Just stay away
from those guys as much as you can, they'll take advantage of your niceness."
"My niceness?" He asked with a raised brow.

"Oh shut up, you know what I mean."

Will sent the hot-headed blond a smile, "fine, I'll make sure to tell you next time. Can we stop
talking about it now? Also, I thought you wouldn't step foot in the library?"

"I go to the library," Will sent him an unamused stare, "okay I checked everywhere else and
couldn't find you and this was urgent."

He opened his book back up and looked down at it, "feel like it isn't."

"Hey, this is me protecting you from those monsters, I know Eddie, Wheeler, all of them in a way
you don't. I know it seems so dumb, but you're one of my best friends, Will."

Guilt burned in Will's chest, "I know, I know. I promise I'll tell you next time, I'm sorry..."

Steve waved him off, "you didn't do anything, I was just checking in."

"I thought you had math this period?" He muttered, eyes still trained on the pages in front of him.

"Oh I'm not doing that shit, skipped it."

"You shouldn't be doing that, it's only the second week of school."

"Yeah, so I'm taking advantage of my free time," Steve said, as if the answer was obvious.

"Oh my god, oh my god."

Will looked to the side sharply, seeing Lucas rushing over to them, "are you serious? I'm trying to
read what does everyone have against that--"

"You guys are never going to believe this," Lucas said, falling onto the chair next to Steve. Will
closed his book, realizing any attempt to get work done was in vain.

"Spit it out Sinclair," Steve leaned forward, eyes wide as his attention zeroed in.

"My parents are going to be gone all weekend, leaving Friday afternoon to go up to my grandmas."

Will pressed his brows together, "how the hell did you get out of that?"

"Said we had a big test I need to study for."

"So what are we doing then?" Steve asked.

"A party, I've never been able to throw one and this is my dream."

"This is your dream--"

"Shut up, Byers," Steve and Lucas said at the same time. Will slumped down with a small pout,
deciding to just listen to their rambling.

"I already got Erica going around telling people about it, and her word spreads so we don't have to
worry about that, but everyone needs to come early on Saturday to help set up."

Will grimaced, "how early?"

"Like one or something, I don't know, I haven't worked out the details."

Their conversation continued and Will gave very little input, Steve and Lucas tended to steamroll
when they got too passionate about something.

The bell rang and Will was relived, it was hard being around his friends knowing he was keeping
something from them. He knew it was ridiculous, in hindsight he and Chrissy had done nothing
wrong, but that never stopped him from being overcome by guilt. No one really knows what
happened between Eddie and Steve, at least not intimately, Steve refused to talk about it. Though,
based on his passion to keep everyone away from the infamous band, Will assumed it was
something bad.

"No practice today, right?" Lucas asked as all three of them made it out of the library.

Will shook his head, "coach is out sick and said I could just cancel if I wanted, you're welcome by
the way."

Steve threw an arm around his shoulder, "see that? I never doubted you as captain, Byers."

He just rolled his eyes fondly, not fighting back on Steve's claim. Eventually they all went their
separate ways for the last class of the day, Will was exhausted and just wanted to go home.
Unfortunately, he had promised himself to start a habit to stay after school and study, remembering
how much he had struggled the year before. While the idea seemed great, actually executing it was
torture.

The final class dragged on and Will had to continuously tap his cheek so that he wouldn't fall
asleep. He cursed his teacher for having such a slow voice, it did nothing to help his exhaustion.
Will took his time leaving once the bell rang, knowing he didn't have anywhere to rush off to like
his other classmates. Part of him was so desperate to just ignore studying and go home, but the
pinching fear in his chest came up, reminding him he couldn't fail and let his mom down.

Walking out into the bustling hall, Will kept near the lockers, avoiding slamming into anyone.

"Will!" Jane ran up to him, bumping their shoulders together, "you're staying today right?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Just checking, I'm going to go over to Chrissy's house since their practice got cancelled too, can
you just tell mom when you get home?"
He nodded, "sure, what time do you want me to get you?"

"Don't know yet, I'll just text you."

Will stopped at his locker, jamming in the code, "fine, but I'm not driving to get you at ten or
something."

Jane rolled her eyes, "yeah got it, I'll see you later."

"Bye," he muttered, quickly moving a hand up to catch his books that were seconds away from
tumbling onto the floor. Jane sent him a wave before skipping off. The halls emptied shockingly
quick, and Will took his time meandering back to the library, eyes scanning the walls, captivated
by the art projects hanging around. Really, he'd much rather be in the art room absorbed in
something that actually gave him meaning, but unfortunately he'd have to push that activity off.

The library was scattered with a few people, but he easily found an unoccupied table and slumped
down into it, backpack falling off his bruised shoulders. Will let out a long breath, preparing
himself for the hours ahead.

--------

Eventually, he was able to immerse himself in the work, shutting off the wandering parts of his
brain. Will constantly felt a hint of distress nagging at him, that fear of disappointing himself
pushed his tired mind forward. When he finally snapped out of it, the sky was considerably darker,
the sun getting ready to make its way down. Will widened his eyes, quickly checking the time,
seeing that it was nearing seven-thirty.

Will stood, wincing as his back cracked. It was a relief to finally walk out of the library, now never
wanting to enter the silent room ever again. There were still a few people in the school, just
finishing up sports or clubs. He made his way to the parking lot, rummaging through his back
pocket to grab his keys.

He wasted little time getting into the car and pushing his keys in, wanting to go home and just pass
out.
Apparently, peace was not in the cards for Will, because after a few seconds he quickly realized
the engine had no plans on starting.

"Shit," he cursed, trying again only to get the same result. Will let out a loud groan and flung his
head down, flinching in pain when the horn went off. He didn't bother to move, forehead rested on
the steering wheel, contemplating just laying down in the road, and waiting till something ran him
over sounded like an addicting idea in that moment.

When a knock sounded on the window, he jolted in surprise, causing the car horn to go off once
again. Lifting his head, Will looked to the window, cheeks immediately going beet red when he
saw who was standing there. It seemed his luck could get worse.

Mike Wheeler was bent down, an eyebrow raised, curls dusting around his eyes. Will swallowed
tightly and grabbed the handle, his car so terribly old that he couldn't automatically roll down the
windows. It creaked loudly as he -very slowly- lowered the glass, a sense of humiliation rising as
an amused little smirk came onto Mike's face.

"Well that took you a second."

Will flushed, struggling to make eye contact. Mike's voice was smooth and low, covering over him
like a heated blanket. It was nice to listen to and Will wanted to slap himself for that thought.

"Can I help you?" He asked, trying to sound natural.

"No, but you seem to be having a little tantrum," Mike rested a hand on the side of the car, "so can
I help you?"

Will crossed his arms, "I'm not having a tantrum."

"Oh?"

He couldn't handle how intense the taller boy's eyes were and looked to his lap, "n-no, I'm just--
my car won't start."
"Yeah I got that."

Will huffed, "if you're going to just mock me--"

"Would you like some help?" Mike asked, his voice so soft and causing Will's stomach to do a
little flip. He raised his eyes, locking onto the deep brown ones staring at him.

After a long moment, he nodded, "Yes please."

"So polite. Alright, hop up," Mike said, standing to his full height.

With his heart pounding, Will pushed the door open and stepped out. His arms crossed over his
chest defensively, he watched as Mike reached over and turned the keys, eyes squinted towards the
dashboard.

"Yeah, your battery is dead."

He sighed, "great."

"It's fine, I'll help you jump it," Mike said, getting back out. Will had to slightly raise his chin to be
able to meet the curly-headed boy's eyes.

"You don't have to..."

"Well, we can't have our beloved football captain sit in the school parking lot all night can we?"

Will was sure his face couldn't get any redder, "are you making fun of me?"

"Do you think I'm making fun of you?"

He narrowed his eyes, "I don't know..."

"I'll let you piece that together while I get my car--"

"I thought you drove a motorcycle?" Will blurted out without a thought.

Mike paused, brows pressed together, "how'd you know that?"

"Uh...I-I just saw-- you were-- I saw it once, I think, you know what? Nevermind I don't--"

The taller boy let out a tiny laugh, his smile widening. It was a wonderous sound. Will had the urge
to curl up in the trunk of the car and never come out.

"Alright, I'll be right back," Mike said, his voice still moving with laughter.

Will leaned back against the door, forcing himself to look forward and not watch Mike walk away.
He knew that if Steve and the others had any idea what he was doing -let alone thinking- in that
moment they would kill him. Mike was pretty from afar, but he was jaw-dropping up close. It
wasn't as if Will had any intentions towards the boy, he just wasn't immune to his effect.

When he heard a car pulling up across from his, Will turned and saw Mike park his run down jeep.
The boy kept it running and walked over to him with a jumper cord.

"Pop the hood."

He nodded and did as he was told, watching with focused eyes as Mike carefully shoved the
clamps on before walking over to his own car and doing the same.

"Alright, try and start it."

Will sat down and turned the keys, sighing in relief as the old engine finally yelped to life. Mike
moved carefully, pulling off the cables and shutting the hood down. Will couldn't help but watched
the dark-haired teen elegantly move around, turning off his jeep before coming back over.
"There you go, look at that," Mike said, arm rested against the edge of the hood as he bent to look
down at Will.

"Thank you."

"Hm, you should probably keep some cables in here, and you need a new battery."

Will knew that wasn't going to happen, "yeah guess I do, I um...what were you doing here?"

"Well, I go to school here--"

"No I mean, right now, it's late."

Mike pressed his lips together, "could be asking you the same thing."

"Studying."

"Couldn't do that at home?"

Will shrugged, "well I could yeah, but I wouldn't have."

The taller boy snorted in amusement, "alright Byers, I'll see you around."

He glanced down, "yeah, probably not..."

Mike cleared his throat and stepped away, "right, probably not."

With that, the singer was walking off. Will bit down harshly on the inside of his cheek and closed
the door, letting out a stuttering breath. He buckled and pulled out of the parking spot, now just
desperate to get away. Never before has he felt so naked in front of someone, it was as if no matter
the façade he tried to hold up, Mike shot it down in seconds. Will drove slowly, convincing himself
it was just a fluke and it was all fine. He was fine. Nothing was about to break the perfect routine
he set up for the year, and 'nothing' included one, Mike Wheeler.
 Chapter 4

Parties. No matter how much Will tried to like them, they were his nightmare. At least the ones he
was usually made to attend. No party could ever just be relaxed and laid back, his friends having
this odd fixation with 'making their mark' which was utterly ridiculous since everyone was usually
too plastered to remember a thing.

Lucas was practically bouncing off the walls by the time Saturday rolled around. Will was trying to
muster up some excitement, fearful of brining down the mood for the others.

"Wait, where do you want me to put this?"

Jane sighed, "Lucas wants it outside, said it will 'spread out the groups' or something."

"What is that supposed to mean--"

"I don't know Will, just do it."

Everyone was pulled thin, but Will had grown used to Lucas' tendencies. While he was passionate,
he also wanted everything to be perfect all the time, freaking out when anything didn't go exactly as
planned. Will knew it could bother the others, but he always did his best to make Lucas feel like it
wasn't a big deal. After all, his good qualities always outweighed the little bumps and it would
never be worth it to make him feel bad.

Will made his way outside, placing the two bowls of chips on the tables near the fence. Growing
up, he had always enjoyed spending time at the Sinclair's house, it was on the bigger side, Mr.
Sinclair was a interior designer, so the home was always in quintessential shape. Will assumed
Lucas got his trait of perfection from his father.

"Will! Can you come help me with this?" Chrissy yelled from inside.

Letting out a long breath, he walked back indoors, hurrying over to the blonde girl as she stood on
her tip toes, trying to hide away a glass vase.
"What are you doing?" He rushed out, going over to hold down the wobbling ladder.

"Lucas doesn't want to risk breaking any valuables."

"Well you're a valuable and it looks like you're seconds away from breaking."

She snorted out a laugh, "yeah that's why I called for you. I just need to put this up and then that
bowl next to you."

He nodded, watching carefully as Chrissy hid away both items, now doing so safely as Will kept
her in place. She jumped down, a wide grin on her face.

"Is that everything?" He asked.

"Yep, now we just wait. Lucas says he wants everything to look put together, but not like he tried to
put it together, you know?"

"No," he said, throwing himself down on the couch.

"Hey! I just fluffed those pillows," Steve said, snapping his fingers at them.

Will held his hands up in mock defense, "I'll refluff them, promise."

"I'll hold you to that, Byers."

Steve -much more carefully- sat down next to them, leaning his head back, eyes closed. All three
of them didn't say a word, exhausted from the day Lucas had put them through. Now thinking more
into it, Will was sure he didn't like parties because of the stress they held, they were usually at
night, so during the day he had to be stressed out about what was to come, and then when the party
actually rolled around he was anxious and didn't want to be there. It was a vicious cycle Will had
stopped trying to escape.

"Do you guys think Lucas is going a little overboard--"

"Dustin! I said to the left!" Lucas yelled from the other room.

"I am going to the left shit head, my left!"

Will ran a hand over his face, "yes, he definitely is."

"Really, he made me reorganize the bookshelf, I'm waiting for the right moment to throw it back in
his face."

He rolled his eyes, leaning over and smacking Steve's arm, "don't say anything, you know how he
is."

"Yeah, and besides, at least it looks good in here."

"Looks good for a bunch of drunk teenagers to come in and destroy it," Steve muttered.

"Have you guys seen Erica?"

Chrissy laughed under her breath, "she ran off the second we got here, smart enough to know when
to get out."

Will had always admired Erica, she was passionate and held a confidence he couldn't even imagine
possessing. Having been friends with Lucas for so long, he got to know the younger girl pretty well
and it truly was a blessing. After years of sleepovers spent at the Sinclair's house, Will now saw her
as his own sister as well.

"Hey guys, it's almost nine," Jane said, walking into the room and turning on a lamp, "when did he
say people should get here?"

"Don't know, pretty sure Erica just said something about 'show up after nine' and nothing else,"
Steve stood, patting down the cushions as he did so.
"Well that's--"

Chrissy was cut off by a crash coming from the other room, all of them quickly turning to the
doorway.

"Dustin!"

It was going to be a horribly long night.

--------

Will was fantastic at hiding, especially when it came to large crowds. It was no surprise that almost
the entire school showed up, the house now filled with throbbing music that made it impossible to
think. He stood near a corner, red solo cup held in hand that was now completely empty.

"Byers!"

He lifted his head, hearing a grating voice making its way towards him. Holding back an annoyed
grimace, he sent a tiny wave towards Jason.

"Hey man," Will said, not moving as Jason threw an arm over his shoulder.

"Haven't seen you all night, where have you been?"

Will knew Jason wasn't interested in having any conversation with him. For years the blond had
been tormenting him in the only way he really could, through subtext that slowly built with every
passing year. Will didn't quite know what he had done to get on his teammate's bad side.

"Is there something you need, Jason?" He asked, trying not to sound too annoyed.

Jason's brow twitched, "just wanted to talk, saw you all alone, can't have our captain not involved
in the fun."
"Right, well I--"

The front door slammed open and everyone's attention turned that way.

"Wow, quite the party Sinclair!"

Will felt his blood run cold, Eddie's extremely familiar voice ringing out through the house. There
were a good handful of people who cheered happily at the arrival of their favorite drummer, but
Will couldn't share that sentiment.

"The fuck is Munson doing here?" Jason spat out, letting go of him and walking towards the
growing crowd.

Will placed down his empty cup and followed after, albeit much more timidly.

"No one invited you, Munson," Will heard Lucas say.

"Oh? That's so weird, because we all heard it through a little birdy everyone was invited...isn't that
right?"

"Don't see why we can't get along, Sinclair," Robin said, her voice effortlessly cool.

Will was finally able to get through the bodies of people to be able to peek at the group. Eddie was
standing in the front, Max right by his arm along with Robin. Behind them Mike caught Will's
attention, he was leaned against the wall, looking extremely bored and uninterested in the
conversation.

"Get the fuck out, Eddie--"

The long-haired teen cut Steve off, "we're on first name basis again Harrington? Don't think I
agreed to that."
"Yeah? Then just get out, no one wants you here."

Will felt nerves come up, tension quickly rising in the air. He pushed closer, ready to be a mediator
if it was needed. Steve and Eddie were slowly getting closer, their postures tight.

"Is that true? Hey guys, who wants us here!" Eddie looked around, and Will sighed when
practically the entire house cheered happily.

"I don't really give a fuck what they want--"

"Get a grip Harrington--"

Lucas cut in, "it's my party man, get the fuck out--"

Steve cut in, "you really think you're all that don't you? Walk up and do whatever you want, you've
always been such an entitled asshole, Munson, just get out!" Steve harshly pushed Eddie's chest,
and Will felt his eyes widen, he stepped forward, now not far behind Steve's body.

"Really want to fight me, Harrington?"

"You're an asshole--" Steve spat out, pushing Eddie back. That seemed to be the last snap.

"That's it--"

Will hurried forward, "hey, hey guys come on just--"

He was a beat too late, and before he could even get the words out, a gasp filled his voice. A cold
liquid hit him directly in the face, and Will pressed his eyes closed for a moment as the room went
completely silent. It seems that Steve had bent down to hide from the attack and Will had walked
up at the wrong time. Perfect.

Wiping his eyes, he peeled them open, and the pin finally dropped.
"You piece of shit!"

Steve threw the first punch, and after that Will couldn't tell anyone what happened. Loud cheers
and screams were heard and he couldn't breathe, desperately wanting to get away from the noise.
Will didn't like yelling, he hated it, hated it with every inch of him.

Don't yell at me, please don't yell at me.

Will shook away the memory, letting out a stuttering breath and forced his way out of the growing
circle. Beer was still dripping down his face, but he couldn't find it in himself to care and quickly
ran off to the nearest bathroom, slamming the door shut. Will swallowed thickly and gripped the
sides of the sink, trying to take in breaths that weren't infected by tense air.

"You're fine," he muttered to himself, forcing himself to block out the loud cheers encouraging the
fight.

A knock sounded at the door, something so soft Will was surprised he even heard it.

"S-Sorry I'll just be a minute," he said, tone uneven and shaky.

This time, the knock was louder and more insistent. Will pressed his eyes shut and sighed before
moving over and pulling open the door, mouth open and ready to spew out an excuse. Every word
died on his tongue before they had the chance to run out.

Mike was standing on the other side, his brows pinched together with a concern that felt much too
intimate. Will found himself wanting to fall into it.

"You okay?"

In contrast to the loud voices tearing at Will's head, Mike was like a sword that cut through that
deep panic. The taller boy's voice was low and spoken with a softness Will was shocked any
person could possess.
"Y-Yeah."

Mike raised a brow, "can I come in?"

Stepping back, he opened the door wider, allowing Mike to come into the tiny bathroom. Will
gently closed the door behind himself and leaned back against it, cheeks flushed. Mike didn't say
anything at first, and Will could only watch with interest as the curly-headed singer moved around
and found a little washcloth, wetting it with warm water.

"If you don't wash that off your face it's going to get sticky."

Will felt his lips twitch upwards, "well that would suck, might ruin my dignity, thank god I didn't
get beer thrown in my face in front of the whole school."

Mike let out a warm laugh, "oh right, that would be terrible, you got lucky there, Byers."

Taking the washcloth, Will began to wipe down his face, ignoring how much calmer he felt just
from being in Mike's presence. Chrissy always liked talking about how everyone carried a different
energy, some energies meshed well and some didn't. Will couldn't say if any of that was really true,
but if it happened to be, he very much liked Mike's.

Will tossed the washcloth down, folding his arms close, "what are you guys doing here?"

"I don't know actually, sorry about all of this...Eddie didn't really tell me where we were going,"
Mike said, leaning against the sink. The bathroom wasn't big enough for either of them to have
their own space, making it easy for Will to feel the warmth coming off of Mike.

"Oh, yeah I mean...I don't actually care, but you know..."

Mike nodded, "yeah."

"So, did you actually come here to check on me, or were you trying to hide from whatever fucking
fight just started?" Will asked, a soft smile playing on his lips.
Mike smirked with amusement, "a little bit of both? I wanted to get out before getting punched in
the face so I just...followed you, sorry."

"No, no it's fine, I probably would have done the same thing," he cleared his throat, "Steve has
quite the temper."

"Yeah, Eddie's not much better."

Will pulled his arms closer, feeling a chill coming over him from the air conditioning. He was
doing everything not to just stare at Mike like an oblivious puppy.

"They're probably done--" Will couldn't finish as a vase shattered outside the door, causing him to
jump in surprise, "nevermind."

"Wanna play a game?"

He raised a brow, "a game?"

"Yeah, come on Byers, twenty questions," Mike said, looking over at him with an effortless smile.

Will flushed, "fine, go first."

"Okay, when's your birthday?"

"March twenty-second, I'm seventeen, what about you?"

"April seventh, eighteen. You're little aren't you?"

Will snorted out a laugh, "shut up I'm not, but my mom wanted to get me into school as quick as
she could, got me a spot in some preschool."
"So are you some kind of prodigy now?"

"God no, I think starting school early actually stunted my brain," he said, allowing his arms to relax
just slightly.

"Oh, I'm pretty sure that was just the football thing, running around and tackling other guys
definitely ruined you," Mike's voice held a false sense of concern.

"What do you have against sports? Just hate that you can't do any?" He asked teasingly, happy to
see Mike's smile didn't falter at the insult.

"You cracked the case, Byers. Now go on, ask me a question."

Will nodded, "okay, how long have you been playing the guitar?"

"Uh, started when I was ten I think, haven't stopped since."

"And the band?"

Mike didn't seem bothered at him for asking another question, "we met in eighth grade, Eddie
brought us all in. Barged in anywhere he might find musically talented kids."

"So, he's the ring leader?"

"You've already had two questions."

Will shrugged, "what? I'm interested."

"Yes he is," Mike said, sending him another soft smile that made Will's knees weak.
"You have a nice voice," he pushed out timidly.

"Oh you like it?" Mike teased him.

Will rolled his eyes, "stop it, I'm able to spot talent."

"Well of course you are if you're able to see how much of it I possess."

"Shut up and ask me a question."

Mike chuckled, but did as he was told, "what were you doing at our concert the other night?"

A blush exploded on his cheeks and Will looked off to the side, "oh uh...didn't know you saw me--
"

"Didn't you?" Mike's voice was lower now, as if he was nervous to ask the question. Will struggled
to force away the whirling starting up in his chest. For a moment, he felt like he was back there,
staring at Mike from a farther distance. The lights casting down on the elder boy's face, making
him look like some kind of dark fallen angel. Will's heart picked up, the memory of their eyes
locking for the first time consuming every inch of his mind.

You take the breath right out of me...

Will let out a stuttering sigh, the memory pinching in the forefront of his thoughts. That night he
had felt desperate to yell out and beg Mike to look at him again, to take his attention. Swallowing a
lump down, Will stared down at his shoes.

"M-My friend, Chrissy, she wanted to see you guys play. the others were dicks about it so I said I'd
go with her. It was-- I mean, you guys are good," he eventually got the words out, voice slightly
higher than usual.

"You should come again."

"Very straight-forward, Wheeler," he said.

Mike laughed and dunked his head, "sorry, I don't want to get you into any trouble--"

"No, no it's fine...I'll find a way to sneak in, but if I do get caught it's on you," he said, attempting
to ease the mounting tension covering them. It did nothing.

"I'll take the fall for you, Byers, don't you worry," Mike said, lifting his eyes and looking at Will
through a few curls.

"I--"

"Get the fuck out!"

Will quickly turned to the door, hearing Lucas' voice moving through the house. He looked back at
Mike with widened eyes. There was a silent communication before the dark-haired teen shortly
nodded, Will understood immediately and pulled the door open. They both walked out together,
scanning the destroyed house.

"Holy shit..." Will muttered, glancing up at Mike, "how long were we in there?"

"Like twenty minutes," Mike said, looking around as well, "alright, I'll go before someone sees
us."

"Bye," he whispered, grinning at the tiny wave Mike sent his way before disappearing into the
crowd of people that was now rushing out of the house.

"God, there you are."

Will looked to his side, seeing Chrissy rushing up to him with a worried expression. He let her pull
him into a hug.

"Sorry, I hid in the bathroom, what the hell happened?"

She sighed, "Eddie and Steve happened, Lucas is pissed. You sure you're okay?"

"I'm fine yeah."

"Hey guys," Jane said, walking up to them, seeming significantly less distraught than Chrissy.

"You okay?" He asked his sister.

"Yep, just fine."

Will pressed his brows together with confusion, trying to understand the odd tone of voice she was
using.

"I'm going to go find Dustin and Lucas, can you go check on Steve? He got pretty banged up,"
Chrissy said, already walking away from them. Will just nodded, turning towards the kitchen.
Trying to ignore the weird stare Jane was sending him.

"Is something--"

"Where were you?"

"I was just in the bathroom, got splashed with a beer, remember?"

Jane hummed, "alone?"

His blood ran cold, "y-yeah of course I was alone--"

"Right," Jane gripped his arm, "we need to talk."

 Chapter 5
Chapter Notes

I Ain't Ever Loved No One- Donovan Woods

Will gripped the wheel tightly, sending glances over at Jane with every chance he got. She still
hadn't said anything to him, and Will was desperate to get into her head.

"Okay, can you say something? You said we needed to talk, so talk," he said.

She sighed, "I saw you talking to Mike Wheeler."

Will felt his blood run cold, "w-what? What are you talking about? I wasn't--"

"Okay don't even try, and I'm not...I'm not mad or anything," she looked conflicted.

"Then what--"

"Shush, I'm trying to figure out how to phrase this."

Will clamped his mouth shut, eyes glued on the road. He didn't have any interest in getting himself
into more trouble.

After a few moments, she spoke again, "okay um, so I never wanted to say anything cause I felt
stupid and, you know, we're not supposed to talk to them, but..."

"But what? Is something wrong--"

"I've had a crush on Mike Wheeler for two years," she rushed out in one breath, her words barely
audible.

Will felt a heat pinch in his chest, "oh...oh, um, that's--"

"I know it's so dumb and I never planned on saying anything, but I thought since you seemed cool
with him it would be okay. My freshman year, you know I was in chemistry with the grade above
me, and we sat next to each other and he was actually really nice. This year were in the same
advanced math class and we've talked...like twice, but I was just going to stay quiet and suffer
cause of Steve and his stupid shit with Eddie, because I really don't want to make anyone angry,"
she paused, "It's so dumb I know, a-and I'm not saying he likes me...but I think there might be a
chance?"

"Jane, why didn't you ever say anything?" He said, glancing over at her, guilt sinking in when he
saw how closed off she looked.

"Didn't want to disappoint you or anything, your opinion really matters and I thought you'd be
angry. I just-- I love Chrissy and the others, I really do, but I've always kind of felt like I just follow
you around and don't make my own choices, I want to me my own person and maybe pursue
someone I like...h-he probably won't like me back, I get that, I mean everyone is in love with him,
but sometimes he smiles at me in the hall and works with me in class cause I don't know anyone.
He doesn't even know we're related, which is actually kind of nice...I love you a lot Will, but I don't
want to be a shadow."

It sounded like she just spilled out years of repressed thoughts, and the guilt within Will only grew.
Ever since they were young and Johnathan went off the college, Will had tried to be the best
brother he could, always taking care of her and putting her first. Now he just felt like a failure.

"I don't want you to feel like that. Jane, you're allowed to do whatever you want, don't let Steve's
weird thing ruin that for you," he swallowed thickly, "i-if you like him, go for it, if you think that
would make you happy...I'll be here for you."

A bright smile spread on her face, "really?"

"Of course, h-he, um, he actually invited me to their next concert, you should come," he said,
sending her a tiny smile, heart warming from seeing the pure excitement in her features.

"Are you guys, like, friends?"

He shook his head, "no, we've only really talked twice, but he seems nice."

"Also, I know you and Chrissy went to that concert the other night."

Will pulled into their driveway, "shut up you did not, I hid it so well."

"You're a terrible liar! I was just too lazy to call you out."

He rolled his eyes and stepped out of the car, "well, at least you know you can tell Chrissy too."

"I'll ease her into it just in case. Okay, I'm going to bed."

"Okay--" before he could get the word out, she pulled him into a tight hug. Will timidly smiled and
wrapped his arms around her.

"Thank you," she whispered.

Will kissed the side of your head, "thanks for telling me."

She pulled back, "I love you."

"Love you too, now go to bed."

Jane walked off to her room, leaving Will alone in the middle of the living room. He sucked in a
shaky breath, moving around and making sure all the windows were locked. Will didn't want to
think, knowing where that would send him, but the effort to push his thoughts away was useless.

He made his way to his room, softly closing the door and leaning back against it. Will pressed his
eyes closed, hating that they were misted over. It was ridiculous, he knew that, but he knew a part
of him had found interest in Mike. Though, Will would need to find a way to crush that quickly.
"God, you're so stupid," Will said, pressing the palms of his hands to his eyes. He hoped the action
would help to relax him. It did nothing.

El was right, everyone was attracted to Mike Wheeler, he wasn't special. It was all fine. What he
felt meant nothing. It was all nothing and it would stay that way.

It had to.

---------

"God Steve, your face is destroyed," Will said, a towel wrapped around his neck as they finished
practice, "I told you to ice it."

"I did!"

Lucas grimaced, "doesn't look like it."

"Shut up, Sinclair," Steve muttered.

Will sent the blond a smile, hoping it would help ease the tension. Things weren't great after what
happened Saturday night, everything brewing between Steve and Eddie was at a peak now and Will
just wanted to run away from it all.

"Good thing you took it easy today."

Dustin walked up to them, "he always takes it easy-- ow!"

"I am not in the mood for you either," Steve snapped, "god my face hurts."

"Maybe you shouldn't have lost the fight then," Dustin said smugly.
Will rolled his eyes as their bickering picked up. He and Lucas left the two friends alone and
walked to the showers.

"I still can't believe that happened," Lucas muttered.

"Do you think Steve would ever consider forgiving Eddie?" He asked.

Lucas scoffed, "doubt it, they're both so stubborn. It sucks, I mean, Eddie is an asshole and Robin
can be pretty shitty too, but the other two don't seem that bad. It's ridiculous, but Steve's our friend
and it's obviously not dumb to him, so I'm not going to bring it up.

Will wanted to push, to agree, but he knew it would be too obvious. Now knowing that Jane had an
interest in pursuing Mike and how she's felt pretty much her whole life, Will felt the need to make
everything perfect for her, easy. Unfortunately, he was not in control of other people's behaviors.

"After what happened the other night, I don't have a lot of hope," he said, turning on the shower,
quickly stepping away as cold water sprayed his face.

He showered quickly, washing the grime off before pulling on some jeans and a T-shirt. Lucas
wasn't saying much, looking deep in thought, Will didn't have any interest in interrupting him.

"Are your parents pissed?" He asked as they walked out.

Lucas looked over at him, "yep. They don't know it was a huge party, but mom's favorite vase is
still broken. Erica and I are grounded till next weekend."

"I'm sorry."

"Guess I should have expected that, alright I have to go wait for Erica to finish play rehearsal."

"Erica's in a play?" He asked with surprise.

"Don't even ask. See you tomorrow, man."

Will sent him a short wave, watching as Lucas walked down the opposite hallway. The school was
mostly abandoned by now, and he listened to his footsteps hit the floor, distracted by his thoughts.
When he grew closer to the back doors of the school, Will heard the faint sounds of guitar and
slowed. The singing was soft, something barely above a whisper, but it was captivating, causing
Will to gravitate towards the low and familiar voice.

"I guess before I met ya I didn't know better. But you swept in out of nowhere and I thought I'd
never go there..."

Peeking in through the cracked door, Will felt his heart pick up. Mike was sitting there, his head
bent towards a sheet of paper, guitar held loosely in his arms. His necklace was dangling down,
sweater sleeves pushed up and allowing Will to take in each bracelet.

"And you set the bar for this stubborn heart and when you met my family, everybody knew that you
had me whipped I ain't ever loved no one like that..."

Will leaned against the wall, utterly mesmerized.

"I ain't ever loved no one like that and when I said I loved ya, I didn't care if you said it back..."

A piece of hair feel in front of Mike's eye, and Will had to squeeze his own hand, forcing back the
urge to walk closer and brush it back.

"I ain't ever loved no one like that..."

Will then realized how creepy he was being and tried to step away from the door. Sadly, he could
never have luck on his side and hit the door, causing it to squeak open farther. Mike stopped
playing immediately and whipped his head up.

"I-I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to-- sorry--"

"Hey hey no it's fine," Mike rushed out, placing the guitar down, "I was just uh...playing a song."
Will felt his lips twitch upwards, "really? I had no idea."

"Funny," Mike said dryly, he then stood up and glanced at the visible hallway, "close the door."

He nodded, taking a step back, "Oh right--"

"No with you in here."

Will flushed and did as he was told, much to embarrassed to argue. He stepped into the room,
meaning back against the door with his arms folded in front of his chest.

"So, didn't know you had a sister," Mike said, walking around the rooming and putting his stuff
away.

"Uh yeah, she um-- yeah," he pushed out, that same sense of dread dipping in his stomach.

Mike nodded, "I've had classes with her for years, guess I never put the pieces together...she's
nice."

"She's great, not insane like Steve or anything."

The elder boy walked up next to him, leaning back against the wall as well. Will felt himself relax
slightly, the close proximity making the nerves dissipate.

"I take it 'or anything' is Eddie right?"

"Oh no, I was talking about you actually."

Mike nudged his shoulder, "right, how could I be so stupid."

"Don't know, Wheeler, thought I was being pretty clear," Will casted his eyes towards the ceiling,
"ew, do you think there's mold up there?"

"Did you seriously just ask that?"

"What--"

Mike cut him off, "of course there's mold up there it's a highschool."

"Hm, it kind of looks like a pee stain."

"Bet you would know--" Will elbowed Mike in the stomach, "hey!"

"Don't talk about my pee."

The raven-haired teen snorted, "don't act like your pee is so special--"

"And I don't want to talk to you right now, I have to pick up my trumpet so fuck off."

Will's eyes widened and he looked towards Mike who was sharing his expression. Robin's voice
was easy to spot and there was no way they had time to run out of the room. Mike grabbed his arm
and yanked him to a small door in the corner, and before Will could even get a breath in, he was
being pushed into the tight closet, Mike falling in after him.

"Are you serious right now--"

Mike covered his mouth, "Shut up."

"Vickie, I really don't want to talk about it okay?" Robin said, her voice close to the door.

"Robin, just listen, I didn't mean it okay? I've just been really stressed out recently and I know
that's not an excuse--"

"No it's not, so why are you even bothering to bring it up?"

"Because I'm trying to fucking communicate with you!"

Will looked at Mike with wide eyes, realizing they were stuck in a room with a screaming couple.
Mike had his lips firmly pressed together, as if he was attempting not to laugh. Will turned away
quickly, covering his mouth so a snort didn't slip out.

"You know what? I don't even care anymore because you're being totally ridiculous and I don't
want to hear it anymore. If you have some issue I'm not a punching bag to take it out on, and I
know you weren't doing that but you know that I'm sensitive--"

Mike dropped his mouth open and Will wasn't far behind him as they both heard the two girls start
heavily making out, it was like a movie scene. Based on what he could hear, Will could easily
figure out it wasn't going to end swiftly.

"What do we do?" He mouthed to Mike.

The elder boy leaned back against the wall, shoulders shaking with laughter. Will dipped his head,
tears gathering in his eyes as he tried to force back any sound. If Robin heard them they'd be in
trouble.

Twenty minutes past and Will was now just trying his best to ignore the sounds right outside the
door. He and Mike had played seventeen rounds of rock, paper, scissors at that point. Mike had
lost every time.

"Oh come on, you're cheating," the taller teen whispered.

Will smirked, "you can't cheat in this game."

"You so can, you're going a second late."

"I am not!"

Their voices were barely audible, though at this point Will was sure they could talk at a normal
level and the two girls wouldn't hear them. He let out a sigh and leaned back, kicking Mike's foot
out of the way to give himself more room.

Mike kicked him back, "stop that, I need more space, I'm taller than you."

He shrugged, "this isn't about you, it's about me and I'm uncomfortable."

"Oh I'm so sorry for inconveniencing you, baby," Mike teased.

Will flushed a bright pink, heart dipping, "shut up."

"Do you think they're--"

"Oh yeah, yeah right there."

Will grimaced, feeling terrible for accidently eavesdropping. He turned to Mike, once again trying
not to laugh when he saw the pinched expression on the elder boy's face.

"Gross."

"Young love," Will muttered.

"This is just straight porn."

He actually let out a snort this time and leaned forward, throwing a hand back over his mouth.
Mike's eyes widened, a smile spreading on his face.
"I don't think it's straight porn," he wheezed out, still trying to be quiet so that they didn't get
caught.

Mike followed in his footsteps seconds later, both of them silently belly laughing in a tiny closet,
practically falling on top of one another. Will had his head bent towards Mike's legs while the elder
boy repeatedly slapped his back. It would have been quiet an interesting scene if someone did
happen to see them.

"I'm going to pee," Mike got out between gasps.

"Shut up we're going to get caught," he giggled against Mike's leg, stomach aching, "no peeing in
the closet there's no mop."

A few minutes later, they heard the two girls finally leave the room, door clicking shut behind
them. Will shot his head up and looked at Mike before slowly turning the handle. Will's legs were
numb as he pulled himself off the ground, helping Mike up as well, easily yanking him to his feet,
practically just picking up the elder boy.

"Wow."

"What?" He asked, glancing around the room, still slightly paranoid.

Mike cleared his throat, "oh nothing, you're just uh...strong, yeah you're strong."

Will turned to the curly-headed teen with a raised brow, "thanks?"

"Okay you didn't have to say it like that."

"Say it like what?"

Mike huffed, "nevermind."

"Did I hurt your feelings?"

"What? No."

Will pressed his lips together with concern, "thank you."

"Huh?"

"I'm thanking you for the compliment, was that better?" He asked softly, sending Mike a tiny
smile.

Will met Mike's eye, palms beginning to sweat. He'd never been looked at like that before. Mike's
eyes were clear, the deep brown shade practically glowing. Will was locked there, trying to suck in
the beauty of Mike's face while he could.

"It was much better," Mike whispered out.

Hearing him speak snapped Will out of it and he quickly darted his eyes to the ground, face aflame.

I've liked Mike Wheeler for two years.

"Right um, I should probably go. I'll see you?"

"Uh, yeah sure--"

Will didn't stay long enough to hear him finish that sentence and quickly grabbed his backpack and
rushed out of the room, heart pounding. Jane's voice was bouncing around in his head, causing
guilt to punch his chest.

He needed to stay away from Mike Wheeler.

 Chapter 6

Six years ago

"Is that the finished product?" Will asked, holding the box of crayons open towards Jane.

She scoffed, "no, I have to at least do another draft."

He sent her a smile, "I think it's good!"

They were sat in the living room, and Will was attempting to help El with an art project for show
and tell. He had allowed her to use his only box of crayons, the ones he's cherished since their mom
gifted them to him years ago.

"I think if I just color this in more--" Jane cut herself off with a gasp, "oh no..."

Will looked down, feeling his stomach drop when he saw the coffee table now marked up with
color. He swallowed tightly, a bubble of fear welling up inside of him. Though, he didn't let that
show and patted his sisters back.

"It's okay, we can just clean it, everything's fine--"

He pressed his eyes shut when the front door swung open. Will felt Jane stiffen up next to him and
didn't dare move, trying to get his mind to speed up.

"Joyce!"

Will stood to his feet, looking at his father, "d-dad, mom had to go to the store--"

"Speak up, son," Lonnie spat towards him, walking into the living room.
"She went to the store," he said, forcing his voice not to shake. Will placed a hand on Jane's head,
willing her not to move.

"Jonathan not home again?"

"No, sir," Will stated firmly, proud of himself for speaking above a whisper.

Lonnie walked around the couch, now able to see Jane sitting on the ground, crayon still held
tightly in her hand. The air suddenly went cold, colder than Will would have liked it to be with
Jane still around. He tried to swallow the lump in his throat as Lonnie slowly bent down.

"Did you get shit on my table?"

"I-I--"

Will cut her off, "it was me...I-I wasn't paying attention and she was just trying to help me clean it
up," he rushed out, relieved as their father's attention turned towards him.

"What the fuck did I tell you about doing that shit in here?"

"I--"

"Said you were going to make a mess! Look what happened!" Will flinched back, pressing his lips
together. "Jane, go to your room."

Jane let out a fearful whimper before scrambling to her feet and stumbling out of the room. Will
stood there completely paralyzed. No matter how many times this happened, he could never get
used to it.

"I come home after a long day, and you make me deal with this shit? You know better! Don't do
this kind of crap in my living room!" Lonnie yelled, bending down to get in his face.

Will didn't let tears come, "I'm sorry, dad."

"Speak up! You useless boy, stop whispering."

"I'm sorry," he said louder, tone filled tremors.

"If you can't respect my house, you don't get nice things."

Will felt fear spark in him as Lonnie took the box of crayons. He couldn't move, feet planted on the
ground. With blurred vision, Will watched his father pull out of the first crayon and snap it in half.

"No! N-No please don't--"

"Shut up or you'll lose something else, you want that?"

Will let out a sob, watching as his most prized possessions were broken and tossed on the floor. If
that wasn't bad enough, Lonnie stomped on each and every one of them. Tears rolled down Will's
face, heartbreak itching inside of him.

"Now maybe you'll learn some respect. Get out, I'm sick of looking at you."

He didn't need any more prompting and rushed out of the room, trying to wipe the snot from his
nose. Will threw himself into his room and pressed the door shut, sliding his back against it. He
hugged his knees tightly, rocking back and forth, trying to calm himself down. He closed his eyes,
almost being able to hear his elder brother's soft voice. For years Will had tried finding ways to
ease his stresses, before Jonathan go so caught up in life, he'd sing Will to sleep almost every
night.

The pure memories still lingered. Will found himself humming the melody out, a smile playing on
his lips as the comfort covered him. A soft knock sounded on his door, and Will quickly wiped his
eyes, trying to hide the evidence. He turned the knob, guilt twisting in his gut when Jane walked in
with tear tracks on her face.

"Are you okay?" She got out, curling up next to him.

He nodded, "I'm okay, are you okay?"

"Mhm."

They sat there for a moment, neither of them bothering to speak. Jane started to shift a second later,
but before Will could ask any questions, he watched her pull the lone blue crayon from her pocket.

"I saved one," she whispered, gently pushing it into his hand.

"Thank you."

She smiled, "you can draw whatever you want, it just has to be mono...monochrome--"

"Monochromatic," he said, "this was the best color anyway."

That made a glow burn on Jane's face, "really?"

"Of course, it's like that blue song mom likes."

Jane groaned, "no, I hate that song."

"I'm blue da ba dee da ba da--"

"They're not even saying words!"

He laughed, leaning their heads together, "we can save up allowance together to buy a huge box of
crayons, mom will be real proud of us."

"Yeah! Then we can make her a whole portrait."

Will nodded, "she'll love it."

He held her, both of them whispering to each other. When their mom got home and Will heard both
adults screaming at each other, he pulled Jane just a smidge closer, mouth pressed near her ear,
humming his song one more time.

---------

Present

"Does this look okay?"

Will leaned back on Jane's bed, "you look great, don't think too much about it."

"I want him to like me."

"Don't try and be someone you're not to get his attention."

Jane let out a huff, her cheeks reddened. The color was most likely due to a multitude of things, her
nerves and the fact she had been running around for the last hour.

"I know, I just want to feel good, you know?"

He nodded, "I get it, but we do have to leave in a few minutes to get Chrissy."

"Fine, this is good right?"

Will laughed warmly and pulled himself up, "yes."

"Alright, then I'm good, let's just go."

He grabbed his keys as they walked out, still sending glances towards Jane every few seconds. It
was hard not to worry about her, maybe he was forcing his attention towards her because it was
easier than confronting the bigger issue.

Will hadn't seen Mike since Wednesday, but the talented boy was always tickling the back of his
mind. He was aware that it was ridiculous, and that he and Mike were mere acquaintances, but the
pure joy he felt from being around the elder teen was intoxicating.

"Okay, so Steve and the others don't know right?" Jane asked for probably the tenth time.

He shook his head, pulling into Chrissy's driveway, "they shouldn't. It will be fine."

Chrissy came running out of her house a few minutes later, slipping into the back seat with her
usual smile plastered on.

"Hey guys! Jane, you excited?"

Jane let out a sigh, "I don't know, I think so? Nervous, I've never done anything like this. I mean, if
Steve found out would he kill us?"

Chrissy rolled her eyes, "I honestly don't think he'd do much, it's not like we're doing anything
wrong."

"Yeah, and besides, if they'd stop being so stubborn they would probably like it too," Will cut in,
trying to ease Jane's obvious anxiety.

It wasn't long before Will was pulling into some mansion, most likely belonging to one of the many
rich kids at their school.

"Holy shit..." Jane whispered, stepping out of the car and looking towards the house in awe.

"Wouldn't you be scared of getting lost here?"

Will shrugged, "some great hiding places though."

People were still filing into the loud home, making it nearly impossible to even see the door. Will
could hear the music slipping into his ears and felt his stomach do an exciting flip. At this point, it
was easy for him to pick out Mike's voice. Eventually, they made their way onto the floor, finding
a spot in the corner that still allowed them to see the beloved band.

"Wow," Jane breathed out, her eyes practically the shape of hearts.

Will could only nod, back leaned against the wall. It was hard not to get distracted by Mike, he was
a natural performer. While the curly-headed teen always looked good, Will was now distracted by
the leather jacket covering his back, it was rolled up just enough for everyone to see his forearms.
Mike really knew how to dress himself.

He didn't know what song they were singing, but honestly couldn't find it in himself to care. Will
watched Mike's lips move, the lyrics easily falling from his mouth.

"They're good right?" Chrissy asked Jane, bouncing a little to the music.

Jane still looked star struck, "holy shit, yeah..."

The response she gave was understandable, Will remembering that feeling. Though, this time he
was hoping that Mike didn't turn his gaze and see them, any kind of eye contact would alert the
elder boy that he was there. That was supposed to be a good thing since Jane was desperate to
speak with Mike, but Will couldn't bring himself to want the interaction to happen. A pang went
through his chest when he processed the selfish thought.

Eventually, their set must have ended because Robin walked over to the mic and cheerily thanked
everyone. Will most definitely lost track of time, feeling like it had only been a few minutes. As the
band made their way off, music over the speakers filled the room, not allowing them any sort of
silence.

"I'm getting something to drink, you two want anything?" He asked, cutting into their whispered
conversation.
"No, we're good," Jane said.

Will sent them a nod and walked off, trying to make is way through the crowd. It was quite
shocking how many people forced themselves into one space. Will felt suffocated most of the time,
the awareness of not being able to turn around without slamming into someone wasn't a fun
thought.

He grabbed a red solo cup, not bothering to pour anything but water into it. There was a gross taste
in his mouth, something stale that made swallowing unenjoyable. The cool liquid soothed his
throat, the air in the room steaming off right along with him.

"Byers," Will turned his head, seeing Mike walking towards him with a little grin, "you actually
came."

"Did you think I wouldn't?" He asked.

"Oh I most definitely thought you wouldn't." Mike stepped closer, both of them backed into a
corner. Will allowed Mike into his space, cup still held tightly in his hand.

"But I'm your number one fan, Michael, I even have a poster--" Mike reached over and flicked his
head, "ow!"

"That did not hurt, shut up."

He scoffed, "what are you doing over here? Won't you get murdered for talking to me?"

Mike didn't make an outward reaction, "Eddie is shitfaced, besides he's so distracted by Steve
recently I'm pretty sure he forgot who you even are. I brought up your sister the other day and he
had no idea who she was."

"Distracted by Steve?" He asked, deciding to ignore the rest of it.

"Hm, not a new occurrence."

Will glanced towards where Jane and Chrissy were, "fine then, you can hang out with me."

"I never said I wanted to do that--"

"You do, come on," Will reached out and gripped Mike's wrist, not waiting a moment before
dragging him back through the hoards of drunk teens.

"Ugh god, your grip is painful, I'm dying, oh dear I'm feeling faint--"

Will snorted out a laugh, "I'm not holding on that tight, and stop stumbling or we're going to fall."

"I'm going to fall for--"

He let go of the raven-haired boys arm as they stopped in front of Jane. Will swallowed tightly,
seeing the two staring at each other.

"Hi..." Mike said, sending Jane a smile.

"H-Hi."

Will crossed his arms, glancing at Chrissy who looked to be jumping out of her skin in excitement.

"I've never seen you at one of these things," Mike smoothly glided into conversation, his gaze now
locked on Jane, completely unwavering.

Jane's face was beet red, "yeah! Haven't ever been to one, but these two insisted you were great."

"I'm flattered, what did you think?"

"Much better than I expected."

Mike dropped his mouth open in mock offense, "oh? And what did you expect? Don't know if I
should be offended by that."

Jane laughed, one that filled out the room, allowing each and every occupant to be a part of her joy.
Will hadn't heard that laugh in years.

"No! No not at all, I've just never heard anything live before."

Chrissy cut in, "that's true, tried to get her to go to see a live concert last year and she refused."

"Glad to know you made an exception," Mike said, but then he did something Will wasn't prepared
for and leaned against the wall next to him, their shoulders brushing closely. It was such a small
movement since they were all standing so close, but it made Will's heart skip a beat. None of the
other three paid any mind to the shift, which was definitely for the best.

"Well I'm glad I did too, do you guys perform every weekend?" Jane asked, making easy
conversation.

"We try to, yeah, it's a lot of fun."

After awhile, Chrissy and Will stopped talking. Well, Will never really started, but at this point,
their existence was mostly forgotten. Mike and Jane easily got lost in conversation, and every few
minutes Mike would get father from him, stepping closer to Jane. Will forced down the lump in his
throat, promising himself this is what he wanted.

Jane looked glowingly happy, a smile on her face that Will had been craving to see for ages now.

"Hey, we're going to go get some air, okay?" Chrissy said, and Jane merely sent her a nod before
turning back to Mike.

Will was grateful for the excuse to get away and walked out of the stuffy house next to the blonde.
"Oh my god, that was perfect," she gushed the moment the stepped outside, "have you ever seen
Jane like that? I can't believe she kept this from us for so long."

Will nodded, trying to smile, "I know, I would have never guessed..."

"Wheeler seemed to like her, yeah? I know he's pretty outgoing so I can't be one-hundred percent
sure, by I think I felt the spark."

"Definitely, yeah."

"This will be good for her, you know? Good for all of us, maybe it'll help mend that dumb shit
between Eddie and Steve."

Will could only nod, staring up at the dark sky, "yeah, maybe."

He did the right thing, Jane was smiling. She was happy and that's what mattered. That is all that
has ever mattered. The only reason Will ever ran into Mike Wheeler in the first place was to bring
the two together, it was fate.

Maybe if he kept telling himself that, the pain would go numb.

 Chapter 7

"Will I seriously can't believe it I mean, he was talking to me. He actually seemed interested", Jane
gushed, the smile from two nights ago still not having disappeared. He had heard her reiterate the
same story a few times now, but didn't have the heart to tell her that.

"It's great, do you think he-- are you two planning to meet up or anything?" He asked, eyes trained
on the road as he drove.

"Well at the end I kind of mentioned something about talking again and he seemed into it, but I
don't want to seem pushy. I still have a class with him, so hopefully we'll talk."

Will peeked over, watching Jane carefully apply mascara. He was proud of her, growing up Jane
had struggled to speak her mind and put herself out there, so seeing his little sister finally grow into
herself pulled at his heart. There was a part of his mind, the annoying and itchy part, that almost
wished she'd go back into her shell. Will scowled at the thought, wanting to slap himself for even
thinking that way.

"I'm glad you're happy," he said softly, pulling into the school parking lot, "but don't let him hurt
you, okay? He's just some guy."

Jane looked to him, "I know, and thank you for dragging him over. I never would have had the
courage to just walk up to him or anything."

"You're welcome, I did promise to help you out."

They stepped out and Will grimaced at the bright sun above them. He'd always been more of a
gloomy weather kind of person, though it was possible he only enjoyed the darker skies because he
could easily stare up at them, becoming entranced by the beauty.

"Hey, I gotta head to history early to finish a test," Jane said, "I'll just wait for you today after
practice I think."

He nodded, kissing her head, "okay, I'll text you when I'm done."
Jane sent him a wave before rushing off, barely making it through groups of students. Will shoved
his hands into his jean pockets, trying to mentally prepare for the long Monday approaching.

His thoughts were cut off when he heard what sounded like yelling from the other around the side
of the building, confusion quickly overtook him. From what he could tell, the screaming was from
excitement, causing people to migrate towards the sound, Will being one of them.

The closer he got to the scene, the more dread washed over him.

"What's going on?" He rushed out, speaking to an unknown girl.

"Eddie Munson and Steve Harrington got into a fight," she said, her eyes glued forward.

Will's stomach dropped and he pushed through the herds of students, now being at the front of the
scene, his head spinning. Eddie and Steve were rolling around on the ground, both of them trying
to get a good punch in. Robin was to the side cheering, and Mike was grabbing at Eddie's shoulder
trying to yank him back.

"Eddie, get a fucking grip man!" Mike snapped, which pushed Will into action. He let his backpack
fall to the ground and ran forward, easily finding a grip on Steve's arm. Since he was stronger than
the both of them, Will easily yanked Steve back, causing the blond to stumble off of Eddie and into
Will's solid hold.

It didn't seem like his intervention helped much, both boys still seething at one another. Mike kept
a hand on Eddie's shoulder, the long-haired teen now spitting blood onto the ground.

"What the fuck is your problem, Harrington?" Eddie yelled, voice filled with rage.

Steve scoffed, "you can't walk up and say whatever shit you want, you're a fucking useless--"

"You're such a piece of shit!"

Will looked to Mike desperately, hoping that the elder boy had some idea on what to do.
"Steve beat his ass!"

He turned to his side, seeing Dustin standing there now and being completely unhelpful.

"Are you serious?" Will snapped, staggering forward as Steve finally ripped himself free. Dustin
just shrugged, looking way too amused for the situation.

"Steve!"

"Eddie!"

He and Mike yelled at the same time, both of them seeming to be the only rational ones there. A
helpless feeling overtook him, knowing Eddie and Steve were now way too heated and if he got
involved it would end up getting him hurt. Will looked towards Mike once again, feeling an ounce
of comfort pinch at him when Mike's eyes softened and he nodded shortly, a silent 'it's okay' easy
to understand.

Luckily -or unluckily, Will didn't know yet- the altercation was quickly interrupted by their school
security guard and the principal. After that, students practically fell over each other trying to get
away, no one wanting to get caught being involved.

"Hey, Hey! Enough!"

Eddie and Steve were finally, and hopefully permanently, forced away from one another. They
were both covered in newly formed bruises and blood, and Will grimaced at the sight.

"Munson, Harrington, Byers, Buckley, Henderson, Wheeler, my office," Principal Anderson

snapped, anger radiating off of him, "now!"

They all fell into place, a tense silence overtaking the small group as people watched them all be
marched to the office. Will really regretted ever getting involved, but the instinct in him to fix
everything was too pressing to ignore most of the time. Truly a curse.
All six of them were crowded into the small room, Principle Anderson seated at his desk. It was a
rather dramatic stance, and Will glanced around the room, trying to distract himself. He almost
immediately caught Mike's eye and blushed, snapping his gaze to the ground quickly.

"I'm so disappointed in all of you," the man finally spoke, his voice low, "this has been going on
for years now, and it is completely unacceptable. This is a place of learning, of appreciating others
and growing."

Will resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

"This thing you two groups have going on has to stop, I cannot tolerate violence. Many chances
have been given to each and every one of you, especially you two," Anderson said, pointing to
Eddie and Steve, "and it seems none of you are mature enough to put this grudge behind you. So,
you will now be given a push."

"What does that mean?" Robin asked.

Anderson sighed, "You all will learn to get along and work with one another, that is not a choice
anymore. Homecoming is coming up next month, our committee...quit last year--"

"Yeah, because planning homecoming is awful."

"Miss Buckley," The older man said sternly.

"Sorry," Robin muttered, bending her head.

"As I was saying, it's a big job and a wonderful time to get to know each other. To make this easier,
we'll give you groups. Henderson and Buckley, you will pick the theme and do the organizing,
reach out to other students, get volunteers, make the flyers, all that fun stuff. Munson and
Harrington, you'll work on the music, and getting together a set list you both like and can agree on.
I'm sure that will take up most of your time. Byers and Wheeler, you'll be working with decoration,
Mr. Byers is a wonderful artist and I'm sure you can both come up with something magnificent--
oh, and you will also work on setting up voting and preparation for homecoming queen and king."

Principal Anderson finished with a smile, and Will flinched as the room erupted into harsh
complaints. Most of them coming from the two boys covered in blood.
"Enough! It is not up for negotiation, it's either that or you all get suspended. Do you two want to
get your friends suspended?" Anderson asked, pointing his question to the core of the problem.

Steve slouched back, "no, sir."

"Good. Now go to class, I expect you all to work out the details amongst yourselves, find time to
communicate and work together. I'll inform Mrs. Wilson of the plan, I'm sure she'll be delighted--"

"And what if we don't do it?" Eddie asked.

Principal Anderson sent him a stern glare, "this will be a huge grade for you all as well, you don't
work together or sabotage it on purpose, I'm sure you all will have trouble graduating. Now, have I
made myself clear?"

"Yes, sir," they all grudgedly agreed.

They all shuffled out of the room like a group of scolded toddlers. Which, wasn't far from the truth.
Will almost wanted to laugh, utterly baffled by how quickly the morning turned around. Suddenly,
he was hit with the force of what just happened. Not even three days ago Will had promised to stay
far away from Mike Wheeler, and now he'd be constantly forced to spend alone time with him or
he wouldn't graduate.

It had to be some kind of joke from the universe.

"Can you fucking believe that," Dustin hissed as they all separated into the hallway, "it's such
bullshit, this isn't going to help anything."

"It might not be that bad--"

"Don't do that, Byers. We aren't going to graduate now because of freak Munson and his group of
goons."
Will shrugged, "kind of a cool band name actually--"

"Maybe we can still get out of it, there's gotta be some rule against this," Dustin said, both of them
ignoring Will's input.

"I doubt it, he seemed pretty serious. Fuck, what are we supposed to do?"

Will cleared his throat, "look, I'll...figure out the details on what we're doing, I'll handle it okay?
All you two have to do is show up and try to work with Eddie and Robin, it's all gonna be fine."

He tried to ease them, speaking softly in an attempt to cut through the angered tension. Will never
liked conflict, unhappy memories seeping into his mind every time that tight feeling began to
surround him.

Steve let out a long breath, "find, alright."

Carefully, Will focused on wiping up Steve's face, making sure not to press too harshly. Steve had
always tended to get himself into trouble, he couldn't actually fight at all, but that fact never
seemed to stop him from trying. It was somewhat admirable, Steve was bold, always wanting to
stand up for anyone and everyone who might need it. It was probably about time Will taught him
how to throw a punch.

"None of the cuts look too deep, but your eye is gonna bruise pretty bad," he said, wetting another
paper towel and holding it against the swollen skin.

"Damn it," Steve muttered.

Dustin leaned back against the sink, "what are we going to tell the others? Lucas is gonna kill us."

"Excuse me, he's going to kill you two, all I did was try to help," Will sent both of them unheated
glares.

"He's not getting out of this, we're a group, that means he has to help," Steve winced when Will
wiped his cut lip, "I bet they'll drag their redhead friend into this anyway. How are we even
supposed to talk to those guys? Does Anderson expect us to just text them or some shit?"

"Don't worry, I'll talk to Mi-- Wheeler, I trust myself not to start a fist fight in the school."

Steve gently pushed his shoulder, "oh shut up, it was warranted."

Will threw away the last blooded towel, "oh I'm sure. Now come on, we don't need detention on
top of all of this."

He ushered the two boys out of the bathroom, feeling like a worried mother hen. In all honesty,
Will just wanted the conversation to end so he could have a moment to think.

Once they all separated for second period, Will let out a long breath, mind running in circles. Not
only did he have to spend a lot of time with Mike and not be able to run away with good reason, but
he also had to deal with his other friends, which meant trying to keep them from sabotaging
everything. The thought of it all made his stomach twist uncomfortably. He should have just stayed
home from school.

---------

"I still can't believe this..." Chrissy said, staring at her feet as they both walked from practice, "and
they want Eddie and Steve to just be alone? They're going to kill each other."

"Yeah I know, that's why I'm asking you to supervise...we both know Eddie could beat Steve to a
pulp."

She sighed, "yeah, okay. Robin and Dustin will probably be fine. God, he really wants you guys to
plan all of homecoming? And for it to be good?"

"Well, he told us to get 'volunteers', but it's such bullshit because no one is going to do it."

Chrissy nodded, "you have me, Lucas, and Jane could help. I don't think that'll be enough though.
Don't worry, Anderson isn't going to actually fail all of you if you at least try, right?"
"I hope so."

"Oh yeah, Jane and I are gonna head to the mall, she needs a new makeup bag."

Will slowed, stopping in front of his locker, "okay, you two going now?"

"Yeah, then we're doing homework at my house, want to come?"

"No it's okay," he pulled out a stack of books, "my mom won't be back till late tonight so I might
use the quiet to study."

"Okay, she's waiting for me so I gotta go, drive safe," Chrissy kissed his cheek and walked off.
Will sent her a little wave, and when she was completely out of sight, he pressed his head against
the cold metal locker. A shaky sigh fell from his mouth, the idea of continuing the week after such
a hectic day sounded like torture.

He heard footsteps walking towards him, but didn't have the energy to look up and figure out who
it was. Will just hoped the person would ignore his existence and wisp on by.

"You okay?"

Will's heart sped up slightly, Mike's low voice coming over him. It was familiar, the two little
words more comforting than he'd ever outwardly admit.

"Oh hey, Mike," he whispered out, "how's your day?"

He heard Mike snort, "can you look at me?"

A blush came over his cheeks, and Will slowly turned, still leaned against his locker. The elder
teen was looking at him with a fond smile, arms crossed. Will met Mike's eye, forcibly pushing
away any sign of nerves.
"This better?"

Mike leaned against the locker next to his, mirroring Will's stance, "oh so much better."

That soft tone was enough to crack a smile onto Will's face, he was quiet for a moment. It didn't
take long for his harsh anxieties to drift away.

"How's Eddie?"

Mike rolled his eyes, "he hasn't stopped monologuing since this morning, I'm tempted to cut off all
his precious hair."

"Steve is refusing to talk to him," he said.

"Yeah, Eddie's pretty much the same."

"Up to us then?" Will asked, voice being pushed out with one breath.

"Oh but of course it is, Mr. Byers," Mike said with a horribly mocking British accent. A laugh
spilled past Will's lips, a smile so wide that it almost burned his cheeks.

"That was horrible," he got out between giggles.

Mike wiggled his brows, "you sound like you like it, shall I keep going?"

He ducked his head, shoulders shaking. Will only shook his head, not being able to get any words
out.

"I believe I should recite a poem, show my ever-growing appreciation, I have been waiting for this
moment my whole life," Mike said, getting more dramatic with every word.
Will peeked up, staring at Mike's amused face with a wide grin. The second they locked eyes,
something gentle came over the curly-headed boys expression.

"There's that smile."

He reached out and carefully pushed Mike's chest, "shut up."

"So, you gonna teach me how to paint?"

Will sighed, "I suppose I don't have any other choice, do I?"

"It'll be so much fun, I'm a fast learner I promise," Mike paused, "when do you want to start?"

Biting at the inside of his cheek, Will shrugged, "wanna start tonight?"

Mike grinned, "perfect."

 Chapter 8

Will got a small list of surface level information about Mike. It only took about five minutes to get
it all out of him, not that Mike was withholding anything, but Will couldn't help but hang onto
every word the elder boy said. The information given was: Mike lived in walking distance of the
school and walked on nice days, he got his motorcycle for cheap two years ago but didn't ride it
often, his sister Nancy gave him her car because she didn't need it at college, and he had another
sibling named Holly.

Them finding a place to start working was easy, the only reason Will was given any of Mike's life
story was because the curly-headed teen was sitting in his car. He was trying not to become a
nervous wreck over the fact that he was going to Mike Wheeler's house.

"You're a bad driver."

Will scoffed, keeping his eyes trained forward, "I am not, my car just sucks."

"Why are you hunching like that?"

"I'm not--" he cleared his throat and leaned back, "I'm not, shut up."

"Turn here," Mike said, his voice still laced with amusement.

Will did as he was told, pulling into the driveway. The house was on the bigger side, looking like a
carbon copy of every single home lining the neighborhood. It didn't seem like a house that Mike
would live in. He took in details of the place as Mike guided them to the front door, realizing how
bare everything was.

"It's quiet," he said, stepping inside, taken back by the eerie silence. Will glanced over at the other
teen, watching Mike swallow thickly, busying himself by flipping on a few lights.

"Uh yeah, my parents don't really come-- they aren't home right now," Mike's voice didn't sound
quite right, it was soft and each of his words cut awkwardly.
Will pinched his brows together, "oh, does your little sister do, like, after school stuff?"

"She--" Mike's voice cracked and he quickly cleared his throat, "yeah, after school stuff."

He nodded in understanding, being able to read Mike's body language enough to tell he was
uncomfortable.

"Well that's fun. Do you want to get started?" He asked, making sure to keep an airy carelessness in
his tone. Luckily, it seemed to help since the tension in Mike's shoulder's melted almost
immediately.

"Yeah, let's just go to my room."

Will didn't know if being able to read people exceptionally well was a gift or curse. Mike had
always seemed so laid back, as if nothing could possibly ever bother him. Now, the elder boy was
standing in the place that was supposed to be his home and seemed like all he wanted to do was run
away.

He let his eyes wander as they walked, taking in the family photos lining the walls. Something
about them seemed unsettling, Will knew it was Mike in the pictures, but their was a lack of
personality. Mike was in polos, his hair straight, fake smile plastered on while his eyes seemed
dim of light.

The perfect nuclear family.

"This is it."

Will snapped out of his musings and looked to the open door. That tight feeling in his chest
exploded once he walked into Mike's room. It was just right, it made sense. Band posters covered
the walls, there was a keyboard in the corner crowded next to two guitars. The walls were a dark
blue color, his bed covers black, but there was a small knitted pillow rested on top of the
comforter. Above the headboard, Will saw a few drawings, ones that looked like they were done
by a kid. Most likely, that was the case.

Mike sat down by his messy desk, chair rolling back as Will continued to examine the room. He
gently closed the door, walking over to the small bookshelf by the piano.
"I never would have taken you as a reader."

"Why?"

Will shrugged, picking up the first book he saw, "you're a musician, can only have one hobby."

"Oh my god, I had no idea, thank you for telling me," Mike said dramatically.

Glancing over his shoulder, Will sent Mike a grin, "you're welcome."

"Do you like to read?"

"I do, yes."

"Well then you're a hypocrite."

Will flipped through a few pages, "hm, and why's that?"

"You play football-- no you're the captain of the football team, that doesn't fit 'reader' criteria."

He put the book down and fully turned to look at Mike, taking in the snarky teen's smile. It felt
natural, a complete contrast to his earlier behavior.

"Yeah well, I was never really that into football," he said.

Mike sent him a confused stare, "what?"

"Uh, it wasn't my first choice I guess? I wanted to do all these art clubs growing up. Went on a
field trip to a museum in kindergarten and begged my mom to get me some crayons, was obsessed
with the idea of being able to paint and draw, all that stuff. Then there was this after school
program that was for kids like me, I got to go to one but then um--" he cut himself off, staring at
the floor, "sorry, I'm rambling--"

"No, no keep going."

Will glanced up, slightly shocked. No one had never said anything like that, not that it was
monumental, but Will tended to talk too much if he was left to his own devices. Usually, he was
cut off before getting a few words out.

"It's okay, I don't want to bore you, it's not a very interesting story."

Mike didn't break eye contact, "I think it's interesting."

"No one ever--"

"I think it's interesting. What happened? Come on Byers, you're edging me with your backstory."

Will let out a surprised snort, "oh god don't say 'edging' that's disgusting."

"Now your stalling, I'm waiting," Mike drawled out the last word, spinning around in his chair, "if I
don't know everything about you in the next few seconds I might just combust."

He rolled his eyes, the smile on his face growing with every second, "fine, I went to one, I loved it,
they had rows of different paints, markers, colored pencils, everything really. There were only a
few kids there, the school didn't have a big budget for the arts."

"Did you keep going?" Mike asked.

Will's mood sobered, "uh no, my dad thought it was-- that it wasn't 'manly' enough or something.
It's fine really, the program barely lasted a month before they ran out of funds and stuff. He got me
into football when I was ten, and it was fine, I liked it enough. I just taught myself how to draw,
would take my mom's phone sometimes and watch those tutorial videos..."
His cheeks were heated with embarrassment.

You talk too much, no one wants to hear that shit, son. You'll make more friends if you keep your
mouth shut.

"I'm sorry."

Mike tilted his head to the side, "what?"

"I-- I mean, I'm sorry for just dumping that, it's stupid--"

"I asked you to tell me," Mike said, his voice firm.

Will bit at his cheek, "y-yeah I know--"

"Then don't apologize."

Something deep in his stomach clenched. Will pressed back against the book shelf, lips held in a
firm line. Mike's voice had been stern, as if he knew Will needed that forcefulness to actually
listen.

"Okay," he breathed out, eyes locked onto Mike's own. They truly were an entrancing color, and
Will had the urge to paint the beauty in front of him.

Will knew he needed to look away, but didn't even want to fool himself with the idea that he had
any power to do that. One perfect curl danced in front of Mike's left eye, and Will's hand itched, a
desperation to walk over and pull on it becoming overbearing.

Mike was looking up at him through his dark lashes, and Will almost started to believe the
unmoving stare was purposeful. Clenching his fists tightly, Will felt his picked down nails digging
into his skin. He tried to use the pain as a reminder to stay put, to not let out any sound or
indication that Mike's stare was unraveling him at the seams.
"Um, w-we should..." he trailed off when Mike sucked in a tiny gasp and snapped his head away.

"Yeah, yeah probably, we should get started," Mike motioned to the bed, "you can sit down."

Will just nodded and walked over, placing himself down across from Mike. His heart was still
racing from the odd encounter, but he forcibly pushed it off.

"Was Robin more open to the idea of doing this?" He asked, deciding it was the best way to ease
into the conversation.

Mike sighed, "she wasn't as dramatic, but I think it'll take her time to warm up to the idea."

"And we don't have time."

"Exactly."

Will folded his hands together, "well, we have to come up with a theme before we can do anything
else. I doubt Dustin and Robin will actually do it."

"We should do something like...bounce house..." Mike said, leaning back and staring at the ceiling.

"Bounce house?"

"Well--"

"Your idea of a theme is bounce house?" He asked, a laugh spilling past his lips.

"I mean we could have a bounce house there! Don't shoot down my genius ideas so fast," Mike
scolded, pointing an accusing finger at him.
"Oh I won't shoot down anything genius, but I still have to wait for you to come up with those," he
said, reaching over and pulling out a notebook from his bag, "when is homecoming?"

"Uh, November? Or beginning of October."

Will nodded, "we could do something with Halloween."

For a long moment, Mike was silent. Will looked at the elder teen, waiting for some kind of
response.

"Wow, I've never heard that kind of originality before."

Will rolled his eyes, "okay, don't do that--"

"I'm...I'm quite literally stunned into silence. My heart has stopped beating from the pure beauty of
your words, dear me I'm having an epiphany!"

Mike threw a hand over his eyes, and Will just sat there, watching the elaborate performance with a
dry expression. Though, that didn't seem to deter the theatric teen.

"It's like I've never seen the world from this angle...how can someone like you, come up with a
world shifting idea like that? Maybe this will change my whole outlook on life. Everything I once
thought to be true has been shifted on it's axis, this whole time I was thinking original ideas were
few and far between, and then you just come up with one on the spot like that?"

"Are you done?" He asked.

Mike spun in his chair, "no. What piece of work is a man, how noble in reason, how infinite in
faculties, in form and moving, how express and admirable in action, how like an angel in
apprehension--"

"Are you seriously quoting fucking Hamlet right now?"

He was completely ignored, "--how like a god! The beauty of the world. The paragon of animals.
And yet, to me, what is this quintessence of dust?"

Will couldn't help the light giggle that fell from his lips. Mike finally looked at him, a teasing grin
on his face. He bent forward, holding his notebook close as his laughter grew, no part of him
wanted to give Mike the satisfaction, but Will was helpless to stop the pure sign of amusement.

"Why did you memorize that?" He tried to ask, his voice pushed out with each laugh.

Mike shrugged, quickly joining in the laughter, "because I thought it would be romantic if I could
just recite Shakespeare! That's what teens do these days."

A wheeze burned Will's stomach and he gripped it, "It's not romantic, you sound like a prune."

"That's because I was trying to offend you, want me to do it again?"

Will shook his head, wiping at his eyes trying to catch his breath, "please don't."

"So, are we doing Halloween?" Mike asked, his smile pulled so wide it looked painful.

Gently, Will slapped the teen's leg with his book, "not now, if you're going to respond like that
every time I'm keeping my ideas to myself."

Mike groaned, "no that's not fair, you can't expect me to come up with them."

"Oh but I can, come on Wheeler, woo me."

"I don't have any other ideas--"

He closed his eyes, "I'm waiting, after that Oscar winning performance I expect to be blown away."
"I cannot work under this kind of pressure."

Will glanced at Mike, a smirk play at his lips, "would it help you think if I sit here and brutally
make fun of you?"

There was a long pause, and Mike brought his hands down so that they could make eye contact.
Will raised a brow, pressing the elder teen to answer.

"How did you know that's what I needed? Such a smart boy, aren't you?"

Will just rolled his eyes, "we're getting nowhere."

"Fine, fine I'll think..." Mike tapped his chin, "we could do a theme based off a book or
something."

"It would have to be a book enough people know," he said, biting at the end of his pen, a nervous
tick he had developed years ago. He hated it but couldn't stop.

"Well we all have to read Gatsby sophomore year, everyone would know that one," Mike sat up
straighter and reached forward, carefully pulling the pen away while he kept talking, "but it would
be easier to work off of the movie."

Will flushed, trying not to think about the gentle and domestic action Mike just made. The taller
boy was now holding the pen, as if he was keeping it away from a puppy that kept destroying
shoes.

"So, do it off of the party scene or something--"

Mike snapped his fingers, making Will jump, "perfect! Look at that? We're so smart."

"Do we have the budget for that?" He asked.

"No, we just have your talent, Byers," Mike said throwing his legs up and using Will's thighs as a
foot rest. Will thought the action would make him anxious and uncomfortable, never having liked
being touched; but it was comforting, the tension that had been in his body disintegrating
completely. He tapped Mike's socked foot, wracking his mind for a more solid idea on their
developing plan.

"We could paint the eyes or something? That would make it pretty clear. Besides that, the colors
aren't too difficult, it's all just gold and black."

Mike hummed in acknowledgement, "what does that scene even look like?"

"I think there are decorations, and a fountain, but we can't do that part...I don't know, I haven't seen
the movie in forever."

"Well, we will have to watch it then," Mike said, running a hand through his curls.

"If we give the basic idea to Dustin and Robin, we might be able to get them to help," Will said,
"but I think we should just leave Eddie and Steve alone for now."

Mike snorted, "yeah I'm not getting involved in that. God, I don't even know what's up with them,
do you know what happened?"

He shrugged, "I think they were, like, together for awhile...I'm not sure, but that seems like the
most plausible explanation."

"Wait are you serious?" Will nodded, "wow, those two must have had some wild sex."

"Ew, I don't want to think about that."

Mike wiggled his brow, "what? Don't want to think about them going at it like animals--"

"Oh my god stop, you just made it so much worse."

"Maybe we can get them to bang it out."

Will opened his mouth to retort, but was cut off by the front door opening downstairs. He looked at
Mike's face, watching as it immediately fell, his carefree smile becoming non-existent as he stood
up quickly. Will felt jolted from the sharp movement, but followed, something about the tension in
Mike's shoulders feeling much too familiar.

"Mike! Are you home, honey?"

A woman's voice moved up the stairs, and Mike deflated, an awkward laugh coming out his lips.

"Yeah mom!"

Footsteps started up the stairs, and before Will had time to think or sit back down, Mike's door was
being pushed open. Standing there was, most likely, Mike's mom. She was pretty, blonde hair
pulled into a little bun, red lipstick painted on. What really stood out was the harsh bags under her
eyes, smile strained and looking painful.

"Oh! Sorry didn't mean to barge in," she said, looking towards him with surprise.

"Mom do you need--"

She took a step forward, eyes trained on him, "I'm Karen, it's nice to meet you."

"Will," he said kindly, shaking her hand.

"Aren't you a handsome young man, my goodness."

He blushed, "oh uh, thank you, ma'am."

"Mom, do you need something?" Mike asked, his voice soft and careful.

"Oh no, just wanted to say hi before leaving again. You'll be okay on your own?"
Mike nodded, "yeah, fine."

"Alright, it was nice to meet you Will. Mike, your father and I won't be back till late tomorrow
night, okay?"

"Okay--"

Mike wasn't able to even finish saying the word before Karen walked out, closing the door behind
her. Will stood there for a moment, trying to shuffle through his brain to find the right words.

"Sorry," Mike said, his voice shaky.

"What? You don't need to apologize."

The elder boy cleared his throat, "right, yeah. So uh, I actually have to head out to practice, I'll talk
to Robin and she if she'll listen to me."

Will nodded, "yeah okay, give me your phone."

"Huh?"

"Oh sorry, I mean so I can put my number in."

"Right, right yeah," Mike pulled his phone out and opened it, "here."

Will quickly punched it in, typing his name into the contact before handing it back. They stood
there for a moment, Mike still seeming stuck in his head.

"Just text me," he said, clearing his throat and throwing his backpack on.
"Okay."

He nodded, and after that they didn't speak again, walking back down the stairs. Will sent Mike a
tiny wave as he moved to his car, mind still reeling over what had happened. Something about
Mike's body language felt way too familiar. It was still different, the anxiety held in Mike's stance
still not exactly the same. It wasn't fear of being hit or anything along those lines, it was something
else that Will couldn't quite put his finger on. Nevertheless, whatever it might be, Will didn't like it.
 Chapter 9

Mike looked down at his hands, pushing each ring on tighter. They wouldn't be coming off, he
knew that, at first it was a nervous habit, an attempt to grow used to the jewelry covering his
fingers. Now, it was something he did absent-mindedly, the action giving him time to sit with his
thoughts. Eddie had said rings were the first shift to 'coming into his own'. Mike remembered the
day well, the loud-mouthed drummer had grimaced at his brightly colored polos and stiff hair for a
second before announcing it all had to go.

That was the first day of his life that Mike could breathe.

Very slowly, the perfectly constructed statue his mom had made of him disintegrated. He threw
away the gels and let his curls take form. The closet full of ugly shirts and kakis vanished slowly,
leaving his true self in their wake. Eddie had always said people can grow addicted to good things
just like they could bad things; Mike made a comfort blanket with jewelry; necklaces came second,
then he got obsessed with covering his wrists with bracelets. When Mike got a cartilage piecing
sophomore year, he had been sure he'd get into trouble.

His parents hadn't even noticed.

"Come on, Wheeler, you're not giving us shit."

Mike lifted his head, an irritated scowl on his face. Max was leaned back against the wall with a
pencil twirling in her hand. They were all sat around Eddie's garage, it was supposed to be a
brainstorm session for their set next weekend, but no one seemed particularly engaged.

"No one else is helping either."

Eddie scoffed, pulling the icepack from his eye, "some of us are nursing injuries, have some
sympathy."

"You did that to yourself."

"Hey!" Eddie looked around at the other's, "someone back me up here."

"Love you Eds, but he's right," Robin said, nose scrunched up, "but on the plus side, you look
better than Harrington."

"Damn straight."

"Oh yeah, speaking of that, did you talk to him?" Mike asked, leaning down to pull his guitar out.

"No and I won't be."

Max cut in, "Eddie come on, you've got to at least try. All you two have to do is music anyway,
right?"

"How does Anderson expect me to put my expert knowledge to the side and work with a dipshit
like Harrington? That's torture."

Mike rolled his eyes, "you're going to make all of us fail, you know that?"

"You're just being a smart ass cause you got put with Byers," Eddie threw his icepack to the side,
"totally unfair."

Robin laughed, "so what I'm hearing is, you wanted to be partnered with Byers?"

"That little shit is so quiet I bet he just would have done anything I said."

Max nodded, "and he's hot."

"Hey, don't go thirsting after the enemy," Eddie said, pointing a finger at the smirking redhead.
Mike busied himself, messing with the strings under his fingers.

"Oh come on, Will Byers is your enemy? He's literally the human version of a puppy. Last week I
saw him run into a wall and he fucking apologized." Max paused, most likely for dramatic effect,
"he said 'oh, I'm sorry' to a wall. A wall, and you're acting like he's some demon you must defeat."
Mike pressed his lips firmly together to hold back a smile. It was easy to imagine such a scene
happening. Will was an easy person to tease, but what amused Mike the most about it, was how
well he took it all, easily throwing back insults without a second thought. There was this aching
desperation within him to take out Will's brain and study it, wanting to know what could be going
on in there.

"He is kind of like a puppy, isn't he..." Robin said thoughtfully, "his sister's kinda like that too."

"Jane?" Mike spoke up for the first time in awhile, looking up from what he was doing.

"You know her?"

"Who's Jane?" Eddie asked.

Robin sighed, "I just told you, she's Byers' sister."

"Yeah I know her, we have an AP class together, she's nice," Mike let out a grunt as he laid down
on his back, guitar pulled to his chest, "we've got a lot in common actually."

"You like her or something, Wheeler?" Max asked.

Mike went back to the first night he truly talked to the girl, the conversation had flowed easily,
both of them clicking immediately. Though, he also remembered that every time he looked into her
eyes, they changed; her hair got shorter, jaw and cheekbones growing more defined. The feeling of
melting into the stare only to be snapped back to reality played over in his mind.

"She's very pretty..." he breathed out.

"Don't go falling in love, Wheeler, you've gotta keep your head in the game."

"What game?" He muttered, staring at the ceiling.

Eddie jumped to his feet, "our rise to fame!"

All three of them groaned, Eddie gave his 'legend' speech every few weeks. At this point, Mike
could recite every single line.

"We will come out into the world already used to triumph--"

"No, no I am not hearing this again" Max said, "at this point it's literally just torture."

Mike let out a laugh and glanced up at Eddie's offended face. There was such a comfort in their
small group, an ease that Mike never thought he'd find. When Eddie first pulled them together, it
had been painfully awkward, none of them knowing how to work with each other. Luckily, that
tension fell away quickly, leaving them as a family. Mike wouldn't trade it for the world.

"Yeah come on Eds, I can't fall in love with Byers' sister when I'm already in love with you," he
said, puckering up his lips as the elder teen sent him a grimace.

"Keep those fish lips away from me."

He dropped his mouth open in mock-offense, "I do not have fish lips."

"Don't worry, Mike, I think they're lushes."

"Thank you Robin," he said, throwing up his middle finger, "see that? Even a lesbian wants to
smooch me."

"That's cause you're pretty like a girl," Max said."

Mike crossed his arms and laid back down, "I'll take that."

The garage fell into a comforting silence and Mike allowed his eyes to fall shut. Mike couldn't
even begin to count the hours he spent in that garage, how much time all of them had spent there.
At first it was cold and gross, but slowly they pulled cash together and got a heater installed, Robin
put some of her plants there. Lamps were scattered around, a few rugs covering the cold ground.

It still wasn't perfect, but to Mike it felt like home.

"Okay, seriously though, what are we going to do about this homecoming thing?" Robin asked.

Mike sighed and pulled himself up, "lucky for you guys, I am mature and have already talked with
Byers, we've got everything under control. All you need to do, is listen to me."

"I'm going to be honest, I don't know if I can do that," Eddie said.

"You're going to have to try or you won't be graduating this year, Munson."

Eddie rolled his eyes, "fine, what you got?"

----------

Mike was not even slightly surprised that Eddie tried to combat every idea. At this point, he knew
it wasn't because the elder teen actually cared, but more so because he just enjoyed bickering. It
was a flaw in his character.

"I can't believe you chose Gatsby as a theme, homecoming is in November, you couldn't have
picked Halloween or something?"

An amused snort fell from Mike's lips before he could stop it. He quickly tried to cover it up,
clearing his throat while Eddie sent him a confused stare.

"What was that?"

"It was nothing, and stop whining, Robin liked the idea."
Eddie rolled his eyes, "she doesn't have taste."

It was Friday, and Mike couldn't be bothered by Eddie's words. He had never been a person that
'lived for the weekend' until he actually joined the band. Before that, Mike had enjoyed school, it
was a place to run from his dreary home life.

"You and Max are meeting with Harrington, right?" Mike asked, as they left the school.

"Unfortunately," the drummer muttered.

"And you promise not to punch him or some shit?"

"I can't promise--"

"Eddie," he snapped.

The teen scoffed, "fine, yes, I promise not to punch him."

Mike sent Eddie a wave as he -rather dramatically- walked off to where Max was parked. He
watched them go, a smirk still plastered on his face. He shifted the helmet under his arm, walking
farther out into the almost empty parking lot. Before Mike could turn his attention to his
motorcycle, a familiar car caught his attention.

A smile played on his lips when he could see Will sitting there, his head dropped down to to the
wheel. Deja vu washed over him as he walked to the beat up vehicle. Just like before, Will didn't
seem to notice his presence.

With a ringed finger, he tapped the window. Will flung his head up, but luckily didn't set off the
horn this time. Will's cheeks turned pink, and it only made the smile on Mike's face grow.

Slowly, the window was rolled down, "hello."

"Hey, you okay?" He asked, not being able help the teasing in his tone.
Will rolled his eyes, "I'm completely fine, yes."

"Hm, start the car then."

"I...I don't want to."

Mike tilted his head to the side, "won't start?"

The younger teen sighed and leaned back against the seat, "no."

"Want me to take you home?"

"Oh no need, usually when this happens I just push the car home" Will said dryly, eyes trained
forward. It was obviously a sarcastic remark, but Mike couldn't help but let his eyes wander down
Will's arms. Imagining what that might look like.

They were defined, a lean muscle that Mike kept getting stuck on. His gaze danced down to the
tanned boy's hands. They were strong, a few veins popping out. There was something so masculine
about him, which Mike felt silly thinking, but he was trying to balance out how Will could be so
boyish while also holding such a delicate beauty.

"You're in a mood today," he finally said, snapping his eyes back to Will's face. The brown-eyed
teen's hair fell across his forehead, Mike had to keep his hands down so he didn't reach out and
touch it. Thinking on it now, the best possible way to describe the boy in front of him would be
soft. Will was so very soft.

"I'm not in a mood, I'm just..." Will frantically shook his hands, as if they had water on them and he
was attempting to dry them. Mike didn't know how to feel about the fact that he immediately
understood what Will was trying to say.

"Antsy?"
Will sighed, "yeah."

"Then-- oh! I forgot to tell you, I got Robin to talk with Dustin today, said they'd meet this
weekend. Aren't you proud of me?" He asked, reaching out a hand to pinch Will's nose. It was like
instinct, kind of like the urge to squeeze a cute kitten.

The younger boy didn't make any motion, as if the action was expected: "so proud."

Mike chuckled as Will's voice came out slightly warped. He took his hand away and stood up,
wincing as his back cracked.

"You busy tonight?"

"Well my car isn't starting, so I've gotta tackle that."

"How about you don't do that, and I take you home so we can work on this homecoming thing," he
suggested, moving out of the way as Will opened the door.

"But I can't just leave it here."

"It's gonna start raining, we've gotta go now," Mike said.

Will reluctantly stood to his feet. He wasn't much shorter than Mike, only a few inches. The
younger boy's head reached just under his eyebrows.

"Fine, but you've gotta promise to come back and help me get it."

"But of course, Mr. Byers," he said, chest warming when the obnoxious British accent he had
perfected made Will laugh.

"Shut up, come on," Will said, the smile still lingering on his face.
They made it to his motorcycle and Mike pulled out his keys, "alright, put this on."

"What-- no, it's yours."

"Mhm, good observation, now put it on."

Will huffed, "you could get hurt."

"I'd rather I get hurt then you, now stop stalling and get on so we don't get stuck in the rain," he
said, sitting down. Mike didn't like to be harsh, but from what he's picked up about Will, the
younger boy needed a sharp tongue to get him to listen.

Like expected, Will did as he was told and pulled the helmet on. Mike gripped the handles tightly,
feeling his chest tighten as the shorter teen slid on behind him, their bodies pressed together.

Mike turned his head to the side, "hold onto me..."

He swallowed down a lump in his throat as Will snaked his arms around his waist. Mike harshly bit
down on his tongue, trying to center himself before riding off. He was much too aware of every
shift Will made, no matter how small it was. Will had to lean pretty far forward to give him
directions, and where Mike was usually too cold, he now felt like he was burning.

When he finally pulled up to the small home hidden by trees, a relieved sigh left his mouth. Mike
parked under some shelter before standing up and helping Will off. The younger boy popped the
helmet off, his hair a mess and cheeks reddened.

"That was stressful."

"Oh come on, it wasn't that bad, and we beat the rain," Mike said, following Will into the house.

Mike stopped in the doorway, looking around at the small space. There was something so cozy
about the space. There were a few random looking vases and décor around, most of them seeming
like they were made by children. He trailed after Will into the living room, smiling at the picture
on the wall. It was of Will and -who he assumed was- Jane as children.
"Aw look at you," he said, being able to tell that Will was definitely a kid that everyone used to coo
at. "How old were you in this? six?"

"What-- I was twelve."

Mike spun around, his mouth agape, "what? You look like a baby."

"I do not, I look twelve in that."

"Yeah, twelve months--" he was cut off by a pillow being thrown in his face, "so uncalled for."

"You're making fun--"

"Will? Are you home?"

They both turned to the doorway. Jane walked into the room, her hair pulled into a loose braid,
large sweatshirt devouring her. She found his eyes immediately, a sheepish smile lighting on her
face. She was cute.

"Oh hi, sorry I didn't know..."

"We're working on homecoming stuff."

Jane nodded at her brother, "right, sorry, I'll go--"

"Wanna help?" Mike suggested, noticing how nervous she looked. When the words left his mouth,
her face immediately lit up.

"Really? You don't mind?"

"Of course not," Will said, sitting down on the couch. Mike followed suit, sitting on the other side
while Jane found a place in between them.

"So, what have you guys done so far?"

Mike sighed, "well, we got a theme."

"Which is?"

"Gatsby."

"Oh! I loved that movie," she said, her voice filled with excitement. Mike sent her a smile, she was
easy to be around, barely ever having any tension in her body for longer than a few minutes.

"You read the book too, right?" He asked, leaning back and crossing his arms.

"I did, but I actually didn't like it as much. It might have been because of my teacher though."

Mike pressed his brows together, "oh, who'd you have?"

"Mrs. Richer."

He grimaced, "shit she sucks, I had her too. Every two pages she'd stop us and make us 'analyze',
how long did it take you guys to finish the book?"

"Like, it was pushing three months, it was really bad," she said, resting back against the couch as
well.

"You're kidding? God she must be getting worse with age."

"Uh, should we--" Will's voice was so soft, Mike was almost sure he wasn't talking to them.
"I thought she was supposed to retire this year," Jane said, pulling her knees up and resting her chin
on them. She was cute, definitely cute.

Jane was nice, she was great.

"Oh, she couldn't do that, gotta get a few more years of torturing young children in."

Jane laughed, "if she keeps going on like this, in a few years it'll take her the entire year to actually
finish the book. Like, I understand there's a lot in there, but at some point she kept saying the same
thing, giving out the same worksheets..."

The couch creaked. Jane didn't seem to notice, but Mike moved his gaze to the side, watching as
Will stood up. The younger boy scratched the back of his neck and turned around, and walked off
towards -what looked to be- the kitchen. Mike could still hear Jane talking, but felt a breath be
yanked out of him. Without Will's eyes on him, he took in every inch of the boy, gaze trailing
down his broad shoulders to his pinched waist, Mike couldn't help but linger there for a moment.

"Did you ever do that?"

He cleared his throat and snapped his eyes back to El, "uh, what? Sorry."

She didn't seem to notice the flush on his cheeks and smiled, "the project where everyone had to
play a character."

"Oh! Yeah, yeah we did that. It was humiliating."

"God, it's the worst..."

Mike couldn't see much of Will anymore, only his hands were visible as they rested on the counter
top. Maybe he should have been concerned as to why Will's hand was slowly balling into fist and
then unclenching, but all he could see was the way each muscle moved and shifted.
He wondered what it might feel like to be under a hold like that. Wondered what Will's hands
might feel like on his skin.

"Gatsby is a great idea though, everyone could dress up like it's the roaring twenties.:

Mike pulled his eyes back towards Jane and sent her a smile.

"Yeah, that would be fun."

Jane was nice. She was cute. He glanced down and looked at her delicate hands, seeing nail polish
blossoming from her finger nails. It was cute.

"We should probably just watch the movie first," Will said, his low and slightly graveled voice
filtering into the room. Mike licked at his bottom lip, not remembering when they had become so
dry. Will usually spoke so softy, and hearing his words at their true level made something in him
stir. The younger boy walked back into the room, his head slightly dipped, eyes peeking out from
under his thick lashes.

He was beautiful.
 Chapter 10

"Steve, you promised you'd go," Chrissy said sternly, arms folded over her chest.

"Well I've changed my mind."

Will didn't bother doing anything, deciding to just watch the scene from afar. In an effort to 'make
amends' they'd all agreed to go to a house party Venus Panic was playing at. It had been Jane's idea
originally after Mike had invited her. Most of them easily agreed. Steve was not included in that
grouping.

That was to be expected.

"Steve, come on!" Lucas yelled from the car, having agreed to drive. Will was sat between Jane
and Dustin in the back, everyone waiting for Chrissy to yank the elder blond out of his house.

"I don't want to--"

Chrissy grabbed his arm, "doesn't matter, you promised. You don't even have to talk to them, you
just need to come."

It took a moment of Chrissy giving Steve puppy eyes before the stubborn teen let out a groan, he
then reluctantly walked to the car and slide into the front seat.

Will moved his knees over as Chrissy sat in Jane's lap. The only one with a car big enough to fit all
of them was Steve, but no one wanted to risk giving the elder boy too much power.

"Are we sure this is a good idea?" Dustin whispered, looking at him.

"It'll be fine" Will said, trying to convince himself of that fact. It wasn't that he didn't trust Steve;
but he didn't trust Steve, at all, the teen worked purely on impulse, and usually that impulse was
not positive.
They pulled up to the house, and once again Will was utterly floored by its size. He wasn't sure
what kind of party they were walking into, but based on what he heard from Jane, it was some mix
of highschool and college students.

"Living by rich people really pays off..." Dustin mumbled as they all stepped out of the car.

Will shoved his hands into his pockets, walking slightly behind the others.

As they pushed their way into the crowded house, Will regretted not finding a way around coming.
He felt guilty about the thought, most of that guilt rising when he realized why he didn't want to
come in the first place. Jane had not stopped talking about Mike since Tuesday, and every time he
saw the way her face lit up, his heart cracked. Though, he wasn't able to accept why that happened
just yet.

"Will come on!" Chrissy said, grabbing his hand and pulling him forward. Will's stomach turned as
they grew closer to where the band was playing.

Surprisingly, Mike wasn't the one singing that night, Max was. The curly-headed boy stood off to
the side, electric guitar held in hand. Mike had his head slightly bent, hair tumbling into his eyes.
The light reflecting on the elder teen's face made him look like a painting, every feature prominent
and holding the ability to cut through steel.

"She's great," Lucas said, nodding along to the music. Will made a sound of agreement, forcing
himself to tear his eyes away from Mike and to the floor. Jane stood right next to him, being a
perfect reminder that he needed to keep any suggestive thoughts to himself.

"He's hot," Jane blurted out, causing Steve and Dustin to look at her sharply.

"I knew you liked him!" Dustin said accusingly.

Steve scoffed, "come on Jane, him? Really?"

Jane's face turned bright red, "shut up! He's nice, okay?"
"You know I'm gonna tease you about that--"

The blond flinched, hiding away from the smack, "if you tell him I will kill you."

Steve rolled his eyes, "I won't, god you're so aggressive."

There wasn't much for Will to contribute to the conversation, already tired of hearing his sister talk
about Mike Wheeler. He tried to keep his face neutral, wanting to be a person she could open up to.
Will couldn't find a reason for him to be so put off about the situation, it wasn't like Jane was doing
anything he hadn't pushed her towards in the first place.

"How long is there set?" Dustin asked, directing the conversation elsewhere.

"I don't know actually, they only agreed to play a few songs though."

Will vaguely remembered the talk Mike and Jane had, it had been miserable. Being a third wheel
was not something he appreciated, but his mind continuously went back to what Jane had told him
about how she felt like his shadow. That reminder was enough for Will to keep his mouth shut.

"I'm gonna find a bathroom," he said, everything feeling too loud. The other three were still locked
up on the performance and sent him a mere nod. Will turned and squeezed himself through the
crowd, trying not to slam into anyone.

When he made it out of the battlefield, he let out a long breath. Will wiped his brow as if it was
dripping in sweat and looked around, walking down a random hallway. He had no intention in
going to the bathroom, and took in the pictures lining the walls. They weren't of anything specific,
it was all very impersonal. Just landscapes.

Will slowed his steps, taking in the beauty and detail of each painting. He had always enjoyed
painting nature above anything else, it was nearly impossible to mess up. With faces or any sort of
infrastructures, there was always a high chance of doing it wrong or not making it look quite right.
Nature was easier to lie about.

"Yeah man, I'll be right back."

Fear swelled in Will's chest. Jason's voice was grating and moving way too quickly towards the
hallway he was occupying. Cursing under his breath, Will grabbed the first handle he saw and
threw himself into the room, quietly closing the door behind him. The last thing he wanted was to
get sucked into any conversation with the smug blond boy.

Pressing an ear against the door, Will dramatically held his breath until he heard Jason disappear.
He let out a short sigh and twisted the knob, intending to make a quick exit. Unfortunately, nothing
could ever be that easy. Dread settled into his stomach as he found the door locked, Will shook it
again in hopes it was just stuck, only to realize he had locked himself inside.

"Shit." He muttered, turning around and leaning up against the door. Will pressed a hand to his
pocket, intending to pull out his phone.

The memory of him tossing it in Chrissy's purse came to his mind, Will let out a long groan and
considered bashing his head in. He could stand there and bang on the door until someone showed
up, but that was embarrassing and he couldn't bring himself to do it.

Will wasn't sure how long he sat there, mind trailing off. The silence was welcomed, it was like he
was living in a bubble, one completely detached from the outside world. The movement and
banging sounds that weren't far from the locked door shifted into nothing. Pressing his eyes shut,
Will felt like Dorthey, like even if he did get the door open, he'd be met with a twisting tornado
sending him to a brighter reality.

The thought wasn't a new one, Will vividly remembered leaning back against his door at home and
listening to his parents screams, wishing he could fly away. Doors had always been something of a
fantasy for him, as if the second he was behind one, nothing could touch him anymore. A stupid
thought, but one that kept Will mentally safe for years.

When his butt started going numb, he reluctantly pulled himself up and glanced around the small
room. In the corner, he spotted a window and made his way towards it, peeking down towards the
ground. He grimaced, it wouldn't be a fall that could really hurt him, but either way nothing about
jumping out of a window seemed appealing.

"Okay, you got this," he said to himself, deciding to toss out any ounce of common sense.

Will pushed it open, letting the warm breeze slap against his face. He moved the screen and swung
a leg out, desperately hoping he wouldn't regret anything in the next few moments. Trying to be as
careful as possible, Will made the jump and tumbled onto the grass seconds later. Only wincing a
little as he slammed his hip against the ground.
"Will?"

He stood to his feet quickly, looking to the side and seeing Mike hurrying towards him. Will
cleared his throat, face flushed.

"Uh, hey--"

"Where the hell were you? I've been looking everywhere--" Mike cut himself off and glanced up,
"did you just fall out of a fucking window? Are you drunk?"

"What? No I'm not drunk, I got locked in that room, I'm fine."

Will crossed his arms, staring at Mike's completely baffled expression, "why didn't you just bang
on the door?"

"That's embarrassing."

"Oh and hopping out a window isn't?" Mike sounded much too frantic for the situation at hand.

"Why are you freaking out? I'm obviously fine and I've only been gone for a few minutes--"

"No one could find you for an hour, Byers."

Will widened his eyes in shock, "what?"

"Got off stage and all your friends were already shit-faced drunk, I had to help drag Jane to Lucas'
car, and then she started crying because she thought you died or some shit. Steve was coherent
enough to tell us you went to the bathroom, then he puked on my shoes. I expect to be reimbursed
for that by the way," Mike sucked in a big gulp of air, "then I went to check every bathroom and
freaked out cause you weren't anywhere to be seen. So, of course I thought you got hurt or
something worse, or maybe walked into traffic like an idiot. Then I turn the corner to see your body
falling out a window, so yes, I am going to flip out a little."
Will blinked at the taller boy, not quite sure what to say as Mike caught his breath.

"I didn't fall, I jumped--"

"That's what you got from this?" Mike snapped.

He shrugged, "I think you're being a bit dramatic, I'm a big boy, I can take care of myself--"

"You didn't even have your phone on you! Literally everyone else was too drunk to even help me
out, it was like talking to a bunch of toddlers. So I spent my whole night freaking out about you,
and you're not even taking it seriously. I invited your sister here, and the rest of you to try and ease
some tension--"

"Oh and I ruined your plans? Is that what you want to say?" Will huffed out, hurt panging in his
chest. He'd never seen Mike angry before and didn't know how to take it.

"Don't put words in my mouth--"

"I'm not putting words in your mouth, you're saying that I ruined your night because I got locked in
a room, very sorry this has so deeply affected you," he bit out, making a move to push past Mike
only to have the elder teen step in front of him.

"No, no that's not-- I was just worried, okay?"

Will closed his eyes and let out a long sigh, "right, sorry."

He kept his gaze casted downwards, focusing on the way Mike spun the ring on his pointer finger
around. The taller boy had the hands of a musician, that was what Will picked up on almost
immediately, they were strong, but held a delicacy to them as well. Each ring was unique
and extenuated the features.

"Will?"
Clearing his throat, Will moved his eyes upwards and took a step back, putting distance between
them.

"Yeah, what?"

"You okay?" Mike asked, his voice having softened.

"Fine, I should probably go--"

"Oh uh, I said I'd take you home when I found you."

Will cursed his luck, "right."

"Okay, are you mad at me now? Cause I never meant to make you mad," Mike rushed out, acting
as if the mere idea of Will being less than happy was causing him physical pain.

"Never said I was mad."

"I can just see it, you're an open book."

He raised a brow, "no I'm not."

Mike's lips morphed into a smile, "no, no you're not...but I've made it my mission to understand
everything about you."

"Hate to break it to you, Wheeler, but that's insanely creepy."

That didn't seem to deter Mike's feelings, "oh no, what ever will I do?"
"Are you going to take me home now?"

"Nope, we're going to do something fun," Mike said, throwing an arm over his shoulder as they
walked from the house.

"Something fun? Like what?"

"I don't know, but do you really want me to take you back to your house where a bunch of drunk
teenagers are staying?"

Will pinched his brows together, "how do you know they're at my house?"

"Because I said 'just take them to the Byers' house, I'll send Will there to take care of everyone
when I find him'."

"You asshole," Will said, gently hitting Mike's stomach.

"Hey! You can't do that, I just saved your life."

"You didn't do shit, I threw myself out of that window without your help," Will said, the smile he
could never hold back when around Mike popping out.

"Oh I'm wounded Byers, my heart is crumbling into shattered pieces as we speak, you're going to
have to drive us dear me," Mike said, dramatically stumbling forward and tossing Will the keys.
He easily kept the taller boy on his feet.

"I thought you hated my driving?" He laughed out, trying to get Mike to stand back up.

"Something you've gotta learn about me if we're going to be the best of friends, is that I love to
lie," Mike said, a smirk playing on his lips as they made it to the car.

"So we're friends now?"

"How could I pass up being best friends with the varsity football captain? It's every little girls
dream--"

"Shut up and get in the car, I don't want to hear another speech-- or what do you like to call it?
Monologuing?"

Mike hopped into the passengers seat, "O Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo? Deny thy
father refuse thy name, thou art thyself thou not a montegue, what is montegue?"

Will started the car with a sharp laugh, "no, please don't do this again--"

"Come on, Byers! I know you know the next part, we all took the same class."

"I'm not--"

"Do it or I'm going to recite what I have planned for my senior thesis, and don't worry it's extremely
long and horribly written. Do we believe as everyday citizens--" Mike started, throwing his feet on
the dash.

"Tis nor hand nor foot nor any other part belonging to a man what is in a name?"

Mike looked towards him with childlike excitement, "That which we call a rose by any other name
would smell as sweet, So Romeo would were he not Romeo--"

"Called retain such dear perfection to which he owes without that title--"

"Romeo, Doth thy name!"

Will bent forward as they came up on a stop sign, hiding his laugh into the steering wheel.

"Come on, Byers! Finish it before my heart ruptures into the darkest depths of despair!"
"A-And for that name which is no part of thee, take all thyself," he barely got the words out, not
bothering to drive forward as Mike applauded, wiping his fake tears in the process.

"Do you remember when Mrs. Galler made us memorize that shit? Romeo and Juliet is
the worst," Mike said as they both calmed down.

"It was humiliating, I'll never get over it," Will said, "now tell me where I'm going before I get us
lost."

"The quarry, you know where that is?"

Will gripped the wheel tighter, "yeah."

It was much less stressful to drive Mike's car, knowing that it had a small chance of breaking down
randomly. He was able to lean back, allowing one hand to fall onto his lap as they drove. There
weren't many people out on the road, it was a small enough town that families disappeared off the
streets around ten o'clock.

"You okay?" He asked, noticing that Mike was staring at him.

The raven-haired boy trailed his eyes up, "mhm."

"You sure--"

"What's training like?" Mike asked, his voice slow.

Will raised a brow in question, "what?"

"Ya know, football, what's the training like?" Mike said again, eyes still focused on him.

"You thinking of joining the team?"

Mike snorted, "god no. Come on, what do you do?"

"Uh, I don't know, normal sport stuff. Lifting, running, any kind of conditioning."

"And you run all that?"

Will nodded, turning the corner that would lead them to their destination, "most of it, yeah. What's
got you so interested?"

"Oh, I don't know, never really been a sports person, wanted to know what it's like."

He sent Mike a tiny smile and parked the car, not bothering to push the conversation. The moon
was held high above the water, illuminating the sky and giving them the perfect amount of light.

"You come here a lot?" Will asked, holding his arms close as he looked around.

"Not as much anymore," Mike sat by the edge, an open spot next to him. Will took the invitation
and looked down at the calm water. There was barely any movement.

"Do you think you'd survive that jump?" He asked, trying to hide the shakiness in his voice.

"There's no way, hitting that water from this height would be like slamming against concreate."

Will tightened his lips into a line, "oh."

"Why?" Mike pressed after a moment of silence.

"Oh uh, no reason," it didn't seem like the elder boy believed him in the slightest, "m-my dad used
to take me up here one time he-- one time I got to close to the edge and almost fell off, I never
asked about it, didn't really want to know I guess."
"You guys don't come up here anymore?"

Will huffed out a laugh, "uh no, no he's gone."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be," he paused, "we didn't really get along great, he thought I was too sensitive-- well, you
know that already. Anyway, he used to bring me up here to teach me how to shoot."

"Your dad tried to teach you to shoot a gun?" Mike asked, his voice holding an edge of surprise.

"Yeah, I hated it, my mom would get super pissed at him every time," he shrugged, "it wasn't too
bad, I guess."

"Dads suck."

Will let out a tiny laugh, "yeah they do."

"I don't think I'd ever want kids," Mike said, laying back on the ground.

"Me neither," he laid down next to the other teen, "afraid I'd mess them up or something."

"Yeah. My family used to be really close, I thought I was so lucky too. I didn't really have a lot of
friends before high school, but at least my family was great ya know? Then...things changed."

Will turned and looked at the side of Mike's face, "what kind of things?"

"My sister left for college, and, I don't know, they just stopped...caring. It was kind of like this 'oh'
moment I had, I couldn't tell if she was the one holding everything together, or if they just never
really wanted me--" Mike's voice cracked and he swiftly cleared his throat, "it's stupid."
"It's not stupid," he said softly, "if it's enough to make you upset, it'll never be stupid--"

"No, no it is, at least I have a family, some people don't get that. At least they ignore me instead of
abusing me or some shit," Mike let out a short breath, "they're just busy recently, it's nothing."

"You shouldn't have to be grateful just cause your parents aren't hitting you, Mike."

Mike bit his lower lip, "I guess."

"When I was thirteen my brother got into NYU. He was around a lot when I was really young, but
once I became coherent enough to remember things, he kinda...disappeared. My dad was an ass to
him, I don't really blame him for running away. Jane was really close with him, took it hard when
he decided being at home was too much," Will delicately explained, deciding spilling some of his
own secrets might make Mike feel better.

"You miss him?"

"Everyday," he whispered, "but he moved on, someday I'll get over it. My mom takes it pretty hard
whenever he misses a holiday though, but she never says anything."

"I've met your mom a few times, she's the manager of that drug store by the school right?" Mike
asked, obviously having noticed his deteriorating mood.

"Yeah, she's always frazzled, it's kind of her thing."

Mike snorted, "she's nice, I went in there to try and buy cough syrup once and she basically gave
me a tour of every aisle."

"Oh god," Will groaned, covering his face.

"It was nice! I like her."

"Well, I bet she'd be glad to hear that." Will dropped his hands.

Mike turned to look at him, their eyes meeting. He fought the urge to reach out and trace Mike's
features, wanting to drown in each one.

"Next time I see her I'll buy her a whole bouquet of flowers to show my appreciation."

"For the cough syrup?"

Mike's smile softened, "yeah...the cough syrup."

"And what flavor did you get?" He pressed, absent-mindedly brushing a curl away from Mike's
eye.

"I um," Mike stuttered, "I got...grape, I think?"

"That's disgusting," he said, scrunching his nose up in distaste.

"And what would you have gotten then, Will?"

"Cherry," Will got out, his heart burning as he replayed Mike saying his name over in his head.

"You're the most basic person ever."

"Hey! Some things are basic because they're better."

Mike hummed in agreement, "I suppose they are."

"You suppose?"
"Yes, I suppose."

Will found his eyes slowly drifting down towards Mike's parted his lips. Even in the pale light,
they were dripping in pink, as if the teen had been biting at them. He caught himself after a
moment and sucked in a silent breath, eyes darting up to the sky.

A silence came over them, and Will could feel tension dancing in it.

"We still need to watch Gatsby," he finally said.

"What?" Mike breathed out.

Will didn't dare glance at him again, "the movie, we need to watch it so we can start painting. We
didn’t actually do it the other night.”

"Oh right, yeah. Next Friday? My house?" Mike suggested.

He nodded, "sounds good."

"Good."

They both looked up at the stars in the sky, the electric pull Will felt within himself didn't lessen,
but he allowed it to take over. Their hands laid close together, and he knew they could never touch,
that they needed to stay just out of reach. Though, when Will felt his pinky drifting over, he met
Mike's in the middle.

Neither of them said a word.

 Chapter 11

The drastic difference between leaving a party filled to the brim with people, to coming home to an
empty house was draining. Mike walked inside and dropped his guitar case, eyes scanning the dark
living room.

"Mom?" He called out, hoping to get a response.

Silence met him, not a single noise detected. Pulling his jacket off, Mike locked the door, trying to
find things to busy himself with. Sluggishly, he shuffled into the kitchen and yanked the fridge
open, only to be met with rows of half-filled condiments and a few tomato's. With a sigh, Mike
absent-mindedly peeked at the pantry, not even bothering to reach out and grab the stale bag of
chips.

It wasn't too late, Mike had left the party early, not liking to be out on Sundays. A naïve part of him
had hoped his mom would be home, that they could have one of their stiff family dinners. When he
was in middle school, he loathed having to sit around at the table and listen to everyone chew and
slurp their drinks down, now Mike figured it might not be too bad. Anything was better than the
ear-splitting silence.

He turned his attention to the front door when he heard the knob jiggling.

"Mike? You home?"

A smile played on his lips as he turned the corner, though it fell rather quickly. Mike had never
been very close to his dad, growing up he'd been desperate for the man's approval, but now he was
like some disapproving ghost that Mike ran from.

"Hey," he waved, flipping a light on.

"What have I said about leaving that thing in the driveway? It's embarrassing," his dad muttered.

Mike held back an eye roll, "yeah sorry, didn't know if you guys would be home tonight--"
"Doesn't matter if we'd be home, son, keep that thing off my driveway from now on. You
understand?"

His mom sighed and walked into the kitchen, placing down the shopping bag on the counter. Mike
followed after her.

"Mom, come on, tell him it's not a big deal. Nancy said--"

"Mike, listen to your father," she said, voice edging with annoyance.

His dad flopped down in the living room, eyes already glued on the TV. Mike now regretted
wanting his parents to be home, since he spent so much time alone, he almost forgot how
miserable they've become. Or maybe how miserable they've always been.

Mike leaned against the wall as him mom moved around the kitchen: "is Holly coming home this
week--"

"What did I say about bringing that...situation up, Mike?" She snapped, finally looking at him with
dark bags under her eyes.

"Mom, I know, but we haven't seen her for ages, it's just one week--"

She slammed a jar down, "Michael, if you want to stay home all week and watch your sister, get
her to school, which is half day may I add, feed her, and take time away from your little performing
act, then fine. Both of us know that won't happen so, right now, her being with grandma is the best
choice."

"Michael, leave your mother alone," his dad called from the other room.

"Come on, it's not fair. Just cause Nancy left for college doesn't mean you can just start shipping
your kids off," he pressed, "and I know you guys are busy--"

"Yes, we're too busy to listen to your complaints about what we decide is best for you all. You're
not an adult, you don't understand--"
"She's your kid mom, do you really want her staying with grandma? Seriously, you don't get to
move on to a new life just cause you're sick of your old one, your shitty business isn't more
important--"

"Enough!"

Mike pressed his lips closed, his father's yell ringing through the house. The TV turned off and he
didn't look towards the man as he marched into the kitchen.

"You have no right to be speaking to your mom like that, we have done everything to put a roof
over your head. You should be grateful," his father said sternly.

"I never said I wasn't, but this is bullshit--"

"Watch your mouth!"

Mike looked to the floor, "I'm just saying Holly shouldn't have to grow up without her family, I
mean you guys said it would only be for a week. It's been almost two months, is that really what
you want?"

His dad scoffed, "You know what? This is why I didn't want kids, Karen. This is why."

"Ted--"

"No, I'm going to bed. Deal with your son." Mike stood there unmoving, "and take that jewelry off,
makes you look like a girl. Embarrassing."

Pressing his eyes closed, he didn't look up as his father walked out of the kitchen and up the stairs.
He twisted the ring on his left finger, conjuring up the memory of the day Robin had gifted it to
him.

His mom sighed, "you ate, right?"

This is why I didn't want kids, Karen.

"Yeah."

"Just head to bed, Mike. We'll talk about this later."

He didn't bother to say anything else, not trusting his voice. Mike turned and left the kitchen,
hurriedly making his way up to his room.

Harshly, Mike closed the door behind himself, tears already blurring his vision. Bringing a hand to
his mouth, he bit into his fist to hide the sobs behind it. Mike slid down the door, curling into
himself. He felt like a child again; a pathetic child that was desperate for it's parents attention.

"Idiot," he whispered to himself, salty tears rolling past his lips, "you're an idiot."

His words came out in gasps as he attempted to stay silent. Mike leaned his head back, eyes staring
towards the ceiling. He let his gaze wander to the side until he was looking at the floor. Sniffling,
he straightened up and reached towards the object teasing his attention.

A cracked smile played on his lips and he shakily grabbed the old guitar pick. Nancy and Holly
had gifted it to him for his fifteen birthday, and when it got worn down, they drilled a little hole
into it and looped a chain through. Mike pulled it over his head and stared. It was yellow, or it used
to be. The paint was chipped now, aged, but it shined through just enough.

He pulled himself from the ground and slumped over to the bed, not bothering to take off his
clothes. Mike wrapped a blanket around his shoulders and tossed his phone to the side, eyes trained
out the window.

He wished it would rain, growing up he'd always loved the rain. Thunderstorms were too much,
and Mike could do without harsh winds, but pattering rain was just perfect, the sound making him
feel as if his emotions were validated.

A stupid thought, but it was a hidden one that no one ever needed to know about. If people didn't
know, it wouldn't hurt him. Wouldn't hurt them. If no one ever knew that whenever the sun was up
all Mike could think about was dark clouds, and water droplets that could ruin anyone's clothes,
hair, or even cause car accidents, then it would be fine.

At least the rain didn't burn and leave lasting damage; but everyone else loved it, maybe he could
learn to as well.

---------

"Hey."

Mike glanced up from his textbook and glanced next to him. Max was staring at him with a look of
suspicion in her eyes.

"What?"

"You okay?"

"I'm fine," he said, voice whispered in the quiet library.

Max rolled her eyes, "do you think I'm stupid?"

"Yeah--" she smacked his arm, "fine. I'm just tired, it's nothing."

"You're tired or it's nothing?"

"Both," he muttered.

She nudged his shoulder, "did something happen?"

"Parents got home last night," Mike didn't look at her, eyes trained on the book in front of him. He
hadn't picked up a single word.
"Your parents are assholes," the redhead said, insults were the only way she knew how to comfort
people. At times, he appreciated it; right then wasn't one of those times.

"No, they're just busy and shit, it's really not a big deal."

"Did you eat last night?"

He pressed his lips into a line, "Max, I'm trying to study."

"Mike--"

He closed the book and stood up, "I'm going to the bathroom."

Mike didn't wait a moment to let her speak, he rushed out, eyes trained on the ground. His friends
tended to be pushy at times, he knew they meant well, but it was all suffocating. Mike bit at his
bottom lip, focus all over the place. He was practically barreling through the halls, so when he
knocked into someone it wasn't surprising.

"Shit, sorry."

"Oh, it's okay-- Mike?"

He looked up, "Jane, hey."

She sent him a beamingly bright smile, "you okay? Going a little fast there."

"Yeah, yeah I'm good. Wasn't paying attention, you're alright?"

Jane laughed softly, "I'm fine. You okay?"

That question made him want to scream, "I'm good, yeah."

"Are you in free period right now?" She asked, and Mike almost went in for a hug as she quickly
shifted the conversation. He wasn't sure if his distress was obvious or if she just didn't care, either
way it was appreciated.

"Yeah, was studying."

Jane nodded, "I need to do that too, was headed to the library, so I should probably--"

"Do you want to join me?" He rushed out, back tracking when he saw her confusion, "I mean, I'm
studying with my friend Max, do you wanna join?"

"Yeah!" Her face went red, "I mean, that sounds fun I'd love to."

Her obliviousness to his life was refreshing, and that panic in his chest started to deteriorate. A
smile played on his lips and he started walking back in the direction he just came from, Jane
picking up step next to him. Mike couldn't help but stare, there was a bounce in her walk that was
amusing to watch. If he had to find a person that encapsulates joy, he'd pick Jane.

"Thank you by the way."

"For what?" He asked.

"You know, for dragging all of us to Lucas' car the other night, it's super embarrassing, but I
appreciate it."

"I--"

"Really, I don't usually drink, but Steve said it would help ease my nerves-- not that you guys
weren't awesome to watch, I wasn't nervous cause you were bad or anything, that would be stupid,"
Jane cleared her throat, "also, thanks for finding Will. He always freaks me out."
"Why?" He asked, interest peaking when he heard the younger boy's name. It was like his focus
zeroed in, as if he'd just been waiting for someone to bring up Will's name.

"He's a great hider. That's why I didn't want to leave in the first place, all of our other friends think
that he'll just make himself seen when he's done or something. It's weird, but even when we were
young he'd kind of wander, mentally I mean, so if he was trying to hide for a few minutes, that
could turn into hours and he wouldn't even know."

Mike felt a smile play on his lips, "I bet hide and seek was a war zone then."

She let out a surprised laugh, "he's never lost a game."

They walked into the library, and Max snapped her head up as the door opened. A glare was sent
his way, and he awkwardly waved as he and Jane sat down.

"You can't just run off like that, you ass," she said, slapping his arm.

He pushed her back, "I brought a friend, be nice and say hi."

"Oh, you're Byers' sister?"

Jane's face fell somewhat, "uh yeah, Jane."

"Right, Jane. Sorry, that was probably a shitty way to...identify you."

"No it's okay, I'm used to it."

Max snorted, "that just makes it shitter. From now on I'll refer to the bigger Byers as 'Jane's brother'
how's that?"

"Perfect," Jane said with a laugh, the smile right back in place.
"So, are you coming to our 'group meeting' after school?"

"Well I tried to get out of it, but Will is my ride home so I don't have much of a choice."

"Hey come on, you're in this now," Mike said.

Jane looked at him, "why? Because I helped you both come up with one idea?"

"It's a very important idea, what would we have done if you didn't help us figure out the colors for
the streamers?" He asked, placing a hand over his heart for dramatics.

"Hey, you can't be getting outside help," Max said, "totally unfair."

"Aren't you working with Steve and Eddie?" Jane pressed.

Max groaned, "it's literal hell."

"What, they haven't screwed yet?"

"Mike," both girls cursed at him.

He wiggled his brows at both of their disgusted faces, "what? I think it would ease their tension."

"Stop, I do not want to think about Eddie and Steve fucking," Max said, shivering as she did.

Jane nodded, "yeah, the mental image of that might keep me up at night."

"Come on, do you think they'd, like, tear each other apart or--"
Max threw a hand over his mouth, "if you don't shut up, we're both leaving."

"Jane would never do that, isn't that right?" He asked, sending the younger girl a wink.

Her face pinkened, "sorry Mike, it's important to keep a united front."

He rolled his eyes, "you both are dramatic. If Eddie and Steve would just shut up, this would be so
much easier."

"And you think them having sex would fix that? Honestly, I bet it would just make everything
worse. First they're already at each others throats and then you add sexual tension onto that? No
thank you," Max clicked her pen, eyes casting down to her notes.

"So, you coming after school too, Max?"

She huffed, "unfortunately, I got dragged in and can't get out. I deserve extra credit points for this
though."

"Me too," Jane muttered, leaning down to grab something out of her backpack.

After that their conversation faded off, and Mike went back to his previous activity: staring at his
textbook, but not reading a word. He glanced towards the window as the period slowly ticked to an
end, The sun was gleaming through the glass, the rays sharp and unforgiving.

Jane was bathed in light, her head bent down, a few pieces of hair tumbling out of her braid. Mike
had to squint, a tension headache coming on as the light burned his corneas.

"You okay, Mike?" Jane asked, lifting her gaze, the white light catching her eye.

"I'm fine, sorry."

He needed some sunglasses.

----------

"And that's how I figured out he was cheating off my tests, really I'm surprised I never considered
it before," Jane said, her words rushed out.

After school had let out Mike had, once again, run into the girl, both of them headed in the same
direction.

"Wait, he requested to sit next to you?" Jane nodded, "and you never thought that was weird?"

She snorted out a laugh, "I don't know! I mean, Chrissy thought he liked me, but I knew that
couldn't be true."

He pinched his brows together, "why?"

"Oh I don't know, I'm not like that."

Mike sent her a smile and nudged their shoulders together, "you're likable Jane Byers."

"Well thank you," she said softly, her face flushed. At this point Mike was sure that was just her
complexation, "but people are so used to me being Will's little sister that I've just gotten used to the
title I guess? I mean, it's not his fault, actually it's probably mine since I just follow him around."

"You are your own person, Jane, I don't think everyone just thinks of you as Byers' sister."

Jane shrugged, "maybe, either way people don't crush on me, that's obvious."

"People don't usually announce it over the loud speaker."

She rolled her eyes affectionately as they turned the corner, the art room not far: "yeah obviously,
but you can usually tell a little."
"Oh can you now?" He said, pushing the door open, finding they were the first ones there. He
dropped his backpack and hopped onto one of the desks.

"I mean, yeah?"

"Alright Jane Byers, tell me how you gained such knowledge," Mike sent the brown-haired girl an
easy smile.

"Well, would you like me to explain every single time some girl has come up to me and asked for
my brother's number?"

Mike felt his smile twitch, "and how long is that list?"

"It's been happening since seventh grade."

"Damn," he breathed out.

"Yeah, I--"

The door bursted open, "I told you two, I'm not doing it anymore, that shithead has lost his mind
and I'm not--"

"Oh my god, you didn't even let him get an idea out, if anyone is ruining this it's you," Max
scoffed, walking into the room and throwing her backpack down, Robin following her lead.

Eddie shuffled in and dropped down onto a chair with a groan, "I knew those fuckers would be late,
here we are wasting precious time."

"You're in a mood today," Mike said, looking over at Eddie with an amused smile. It was nearly
impossible not to laugh when the drummer was near, something about him was so extravagant that
being around him was like watching a soap opera.
"Fuck off, Wheeler, you do not want to get on my bad side today."

"There's no more room on your bad side, it's completely taken up by Steve Harrington," he said in
a sing-song voice, dodging the pencil Eddie threw at him.

"Why is the only one here the sister? She didn't even get in trouble." Eddie stood to his feet and
walked towards Jane, moving around as if he was examining her.

"Eds, don't freak her out," Mike grumbled, gently pushing his friend's shoulder.

"What's your name again?"

"Jane."

Eddie nodded, "mhm, not bad. My grandma's name was Jane."

"No it wasn't--"

The long-haired teen cut Max off, "shut it, I'm creating a bond."

Jane finally cracked a smile, "would it help out if I said Steve was annoying?"

A smile slipped on Eddie's face, "yes it would madam, welcome to the team."

The door opened again, this time much less dramatically. Dustin and Steve walked in first, both of
their faces pinched with irritation. Following them was Lucas and Chrissy, Will a step behind.

"Look who finally showed up," Robin said.

"We're two minutes late, fuck off," Steve said, face twirled into a sneer. Really, it was just his
normal expression at this point.
Mike didn't pay much attention to them, eyes seeming to be stuck on Will. The younger boy hadn't
said a word yet, backpack on the ground as he leaned against the wall. Something about Will's
style seemed so comfortable, he was in a long sleeve white shirt, a rolled up and open flannel on
top of it with blue jeans and worn white converse.

"Why did Anderson want us to meet?" Max asked, trying to ease the tension.

Dustin stepped forward and placed a binder down on the table in the middle, "he wants us to 'put
our heads together' or some shit, his plans."

"Plans? What plans? I thought we were coming up with the plans--"

Eddie cut Steve off, "if you say 'plans' one more time I'm going to lose my shit."

"Oh will you? Because I'm so terrified--"

"Alright stop," Lucas said, pushing Steve's shoulder.

Mike crossed his arms, twisting the bracelet on his wrist. His current plan was to stay quiet -which
was hard enough- until he found a reason to interject. Once again he found his gaze wandering
towards Will, he was right by the bookshelf, meaning a shadow was casted on him, making the
soft-spoken boy look like he was hiding. It only took a few moments of staring before Will turned
to him, their eyes locking. Mike felt his heart pick up, finally getting the attention he'd never admit
he was craving.

Will didn't smile or give him any kind of friendly movement, his stare unwavering. The others
were still talking, but to Mike it was nothing intelligible. He moved his eyes down Will's chest, not
being able to help himself. He stopped on the boy's thighs, Will had one foot pressed against the
wall; Mike knew the younger teen was strong, he could see the muscle under the thick material.
Clenching his fist, Mike pushed a hand behind his back, as if it was at risk of flying out of touching
what his focus was stuck on.

He moved back up, clearing his throat when he found Will still looking at him, eyes dark and
hidden behind thick lashes. Mike clenched his jaw, looking towards the other side of the room.
"--that doesn't even make sense, if we're doing this based on Gatsby we can't have rock music--"

Eddie groaned, "the music doesn't have to fit the theme, just say you hate real art and we will move
on."

"Why don't we do something, like, everyone has to dress up like it's the 1920s? That could be fun
right?" Chrissy suggested, sitting down with a notebook out.

"How would we enforce a dress code?" Robin asked.

The youngest Byers sibling shrugged, "it doesn't have to be a requirement."

"Right, but then no one will do it," Lucas grumbled, "maybe we should do a costume party--"

"That's just Halloween," Max said.

Mike felt eyes on him, and he knew who they belonged to. Internally, he told himself not to look,
because then he'd miss the conversation again. He didn't want to look, there was no reason he
should be staring at a guy with drool trying to drip out his mouth. Will was his friend, he didn't
want to look at him.

Stop looking at me.

"We could hire a live orchestra!"

I don't want to look at him.

"How the fuck would we do that? That's out of out budget."

Mike bit down on his tongue, feeling his rings digging into his palm. He looked away from Eddie's
bored face, not being able to fight the addiction, his gaze easily finding Will. A tight frustration
spread inside of him when the younger boy wasn't looking towards him anymore.
"Well can any of you play a violin or some shit?"

Look at me.

"I used to play the trumpet."

Please look at me.

"That could work."

God, look at me. Look at me.

"Mike? Can't you play the cello?"

He sucked in a sharp breath and looked at Robin, heart racing. Everyone's eyes were on him. Mike
cleared his throat, attempting to wrap his mind around the half conversation he heard.

"Uh, I used to, but I was never very good."

Max scoffed, "he's being modest, he's great."

"You can play the cello? That's impressive." Jane said, a smile shining on her face.

"My hidden talent," he smirked, leaning an arm back on the desk.

"Oh great, so now our plan is to have one cello player? That's what we came up with? At this point
we miswell--"

"Steve, that's enough," Will finally spoke, his voice was calm and silk like. It reminded Mike of
being able to lay down in bed after an exhausting day. An odd thought, but a perfect comparison.

Everyone shut up, as if Will's short words wrapped leashes around their necks. Will pushed himself
off the wall: "the only thing we need to be worrying about is what each group is going to be
focusing on. If it's not your group, then your negative opinion doesn't matter."

"Will's right, this is going to take ages if we keep fighting," Lucas said.

Mike nodded, "right. So Eddie and Steve need to just focus on music, if we want a live band, fine
we can do that, but just try and come up with a few songs we can play that you both don't despise.
Robin, you, Dustin, and Lucas don't even need to figure out the theme, just start making posters
and figure out how people are getting tickets. Byers and I will plan the decorations and then tell
you guys. Got it?"

Everyone grudgedly agreed and that slowly ended their little 'meeting'. Mike took his time getting
off the desk, watching as the others bustled out. His eyes found Will once again, and he couldn't
move as the younger boy made his way out of the room and out of sight. A breath fell from his lips
as he fought the urge to run after Will and talk to him.

Mike quickly shook his head, he was being ridiculous. Will was a friend, a great friend that he
found himself growing close to. That was all.

Nothing was wrong, nothing was ever wrong.

 Chapter 12

Friday rolled around quickly. The week had been exhausting and Will was about ready to pass out.
Practice ended early, which was a gift since Will was pretty sure he pulled a muscle. He dragged
himself home and showered, the hot water relieving some of his tension.

"Hey, are you doing something tonight?" Jane asked, walking into his room as he was pulling on a
t-shirt.

"I've gotta go work on the homecoming thing with Mike, why?"

Jane sat on his bed, "I was gonna ask if you wanted to see a movie with Chrissy, Dustin, and I,
doesn't matter. Hey uh, can you...let me know if he mentions me?"

He let out an amused snort and looked at the flushed girl, "do you want me to bring you up? Ask
him what he thinks?"

"God no, that's way too obvious. Don't worry about it, it's just-- I don't know."

Will tugged a belt on, "is something wrong?"

"No, no of course not. He's just impossible to read." Jane dramatically threw herself down, "I mean,
this is supposed to be easy right?"

"Liking a guy?"

"I guess." She muttered.

Will sighed and placed himself down next to her, "why don't you just ask him out?"

"What? Are you crazy? What?" She spluttered, looking at him as if he'd kicked her cat.
"You're being dramatic--"

"No, you're telling me I should ask Mike fucking Wheeler out? Have you lost your mind?"

He held his hands up in defense, "I don't think it's that big of a deal--"

"Of course not, you're a guy."

Will patted her head, "it's not fair to use that every time."

"Oh it's totally fair, if he rejected me I'd be mortified. Do you think I'd ever be able to leave my
room after that?" She paused, "maybe I can do it in a subtle way..."

"Perfect plan, now get out of my room I've gotta leave."

Jane rolled her eyes, but did as she was told. Will pulled his door shut behind them, ushering his
sister into the hallway.

"You better tell me everything that happens," Jane said, walking into the kitchen.

"Okay--"

"Happens with what? Where are you going honey?" Their mom said, looking up from the pot she
was leaning over.

Will grabbed his keys, "I'm just going to go work on this homecoming project thing, I don't think
I'll be too late."

She smiled, "oh! That nice kid with the curly hair? What's his name, I know I've met him--"

Jane cut her off, "it's Mike, mom."

"Yes! Tell him I said hi, okay? Bring him around more, we can all have dinner together sometime."
She smiled happily, walking over to press a kiss to his cheek, "be home before eleven, okay?"

"I will, bye guys."

"Bye!" They both called as he walked from the door. As he pulled out of the driveway, Will felt
himself grow nervous. He and Mike hadn't had a full conversation since last weekend. They'd
texted a few times, but they were short, never lasting as long as Will privately wished they would.

Part of him was worried Mike was mad at him, in the back of his mind Will was aware it was
ridiculous. After Monday, Jane liked to talk to him about how she spent her free period with Mike,
now always joining the teen and his redheaded friend to study. Will hated how that made him feel,
he should be excited for her.

Jane was happier now than she had been in ages, and Will must be some kind of monster for
feeling jealous. He knew how it would all go, eventually Jane would work up the courage to ask
Mike out or vice versa and he would get over whatever he was feeling. That's how it worked.

He wanted that for Jane, if she was happy then so was he.

If she was happy he would be too.

He was happy, it was fine.

Will pulled up to the house and parked on the road behind Mike's motorcycle. Taking a deep
breath, he pushed himself out of the car, nervously twirling his keys around. Just like before, the
house and everything around it was silent, as if not a single person was around. Clearing his throat,
Will knocked on the door.

Even the soft tap sounded like he just dropped a barbell.

The door swung open a few seconds later, Mike's easy smile taking place of the overly polished
wood.
"Hey."

Will crossed his arms, "hi."

"Come on in." Mike moved out of the way, motioning for Will to step inside.

He did as he was told, he almost mentioned the silence, but remembered Mike's reaction the first
time he did so and kept his mouth shut.

"My parents won't be home till tomorrow--"

"Tomorrow?" He asked, not being able to hide his shock.

Mike cleared his throat, "they're on a business trip."

"Right, sorry."

"No it's fine, not a big deal," Mike's voice was whispered as he guided them to the basement.

Just like the curly-headed boy's room, it oozed in personality. There was a large and comfy looking
couch situated in the corner, a TV sat in front of it. To the right was a table covered in board
games.

"Spend a lot of time down here?"

Mike threw himself down on the couch, "yeah, my parents hate it here so I use it as my own."

Will placed himself next to the long boy, "I think it's nice, even has a bathroom."
"You sound like you're house hunting." Mike said with a snort, leaning over to grab the remote.

"No, if I was house hunting I'd say that something has to be done about that stain on the ceiling,
might be asepsis--"

Mike threw a pillow his way, "do you wanna know what that stain is actually from?"

"Mold?"

"Fuck no, my mom is a freak about that shit. Three years ago I tried that Mentos and coke thing,
shot straight up."

"Oh I did that," he said, leaning back and crossing his arms.

"Did it stain your ceiling too?"

"No, cause I did it outside cause I'm not an idiot."

Mike gasped, "you wound me, Byers. You really think I'm an idiot?"

"I think you're over excitable, do before you think."

"You can't be making observations about my character, that's not in our friendship contract."

Will hummed, eyes trained on the TV as Mike lazily scrolled past movies: "I'm the one writing the
contract, so I say it is."

"Well I veto that."

"You can't, it's already been made into law."

"Shit," Mike cursed, as if the news was actually troubling.

The conversation came easy, and Will questioned why he felt so nervous in the first place. He
glanced over at Mike, being reminded of his nerves in seconds when he already found the elder
boy's eyes on him. Will swallowed tightly and snapped his head forward.

"So uh, you gonna play it?"

"Right yeah, should we...take notes?"

Will shrugged, "no, unless you're scared you'll forget the plot."

"Smart ass," Mike mumbled before pressing play.

The beginning of the movie dragged on, Will had never been a fan of films. Not that he hated
them, that would be barbaric, but he liked things that held a lighter air, something so unrealistic
that it could never replicate real life. The riches that were spewed out of The Great Gatsby were
sickening in a way Will couldn't always stomach; though, he figured that may have been part of the
point. The movie involved a lot of yelling, large crowds, out worldly theatrics, and drinking.

Will didn't like the drinking, no matter how fake it was. Seeing the sweat collect on each
character's face, their stumbling and inability to be full people twisted out memories from his mind.

"The rest of New York simply came, uninvited. The whole city packed into automobiles and all
weekend, every weekend, ended up at Gatsby's."

He folded his arms, eyes trained on the infamous scene.

"Film stars , Broadway directors, morality protectors, highschool defectors, and Ewing
klipspringer, dubious descendent of Beethoven."

Will glanced over at Mike, seeing that the other boy looked just as interested in the movie as he
was. Which wasn't much.

"Alone, and a little embarrassed, I decided to get roaring drunk."

"I don't think we have the budget for that fountain." Mike grumbled out, a yawn spilling past his
lips.

Will let out a snort, "we can just pull a kiddie pool inside."

"Yeah, get a few little fish in there and call it a day."

"Wouldn't that kill them?"

Mike shrugged, "put them out of their misery."

"I don't think fish have the brains to comprehend misery."

"That was so poetic of you." The taller boy's slumped figure finally fell down the couch, Mike's
head resting comfortably in Will's lap. It was such a gradual movement, but it caused Will's brain
to spin.

"Did you have to watch this movie in class?" Mike asked, acting as if he didn't just curl up in Will's
lap.

Since Mike thought nothing of it, Will followed his lead, "yeah, fell asleep for half of it."

"This scene always grosses me out."

"Why?"

Mike shrugged, "everyone is so...pressed together, I hate parties like that."

"You don't like being touched?" He asked.

"I don't mind that, I like being around a lot of people, that's fine. I don't know...something about it
just seems so accidental."

Will raised a brow, "so you don't like to be accidently touched?"

"This therapy session you're giving me is exhausting."

He laughed under his breath, glancing down at Mike. The elder boy's eyes were trained on the TV,
but he still didn't seem to be giving it much attention. Only the dim light from the movie
illuminated the room, and Will couldn't help but stare for a moment, taking in Mike's complexion.
There was something so captivating about him. Now being so close Will could see the freckles
scattered across the boy's cheeks and nose, making him look like a painting. It was as if someone
sat and took hours upon hours on deciding where to place each detail to create an art piece no one
could ignore.

In contrast to Mike's pale skin, his hair was dark black, causing every feature to glow and stand
out. With the curly-headed teen's head turned to the side, Will could easily see the piercings on
Mike's ear.

There were two silver rings through his cartilage, one of them holding a little yellow gem. He also
had, what looked to be, a double piercing, but there was only a little stud in the second hole.

"House looks well doesn't it? See the way the whole front catches the light like that?"

"I love this song," Mike spoke out, "it's beautiful, yeah?"

"Yeah...yeah it's..." he whispered, "really beautiful."

Will didn't have an idea what was going on in the movie. His eyes stayed where they were,
entranced as Mike turned and looked up at him, thick lashes fluttering as they locked stares. Will's
breath pinched as he caught the elder teen's eye, even in the darkness he could have drawn every
detail of Mike's iris, even the colors barely visible were gleaming at him.
Hot summer nights, rock and roll, the way you'd play for me at your show.

Timidly, Will brought a hand up, almost trembling as he ghosting his fingers right under Mike's left
eye. The dark-eyed boy sucked in a short breath, but when he didn't pull away Will continued.

And all the ways I got to know your pretty face and electric soul.

Every patch of skin was softer than the next, and Will found himself mentally intoxicated by the
feeling. He gently traced down Mike's cheekbone, keeping his eyes trained on Mike's own, almost
fearful that if he glanced away he would forget what they looked like. Will's mind was utterly
blank while simultaneously being filled with intricate observations and thoughts he'd never dared
venture to before.

Will you still love me when I'm no longer young and beautiful?

His thumb slowly flittered under Mike's pinked lips. Will nearly felt his heart grow a new
extension as the teen under him cracked his mouth open, a trembling gasp of air spilling out. Will
stopped all movement, frozen as he watched Mike's eyes move around his face, seeming as if he
was searching for something.

I know you will, I know you will, I know that you will.

Will felt a desperation rising in him and he glided his hand up Mike's cheek under his fingers were
carding through the other boy's raven curls. At the motion, he zeroed in to the way Mike's eyes
fluttered, finding such a small movement so pretty. Will didn't pull or make any sharp gestures, he
merely studied the way Mike's hair felt in his hands, knowing he may never get another chance to.

A loud knock sounded from the front door, and suddenly everything sped up and snapped into
place. Will sucked in a gasp and tore his eyes away, hands falling to his sides as if Mike had burned
him. The elder boy rolled off his lap, looking completely disoriented.

Mike was bounding up the stairs in seconds, giving Will a second to try and catch his breath. Never
once has he been so careless, so unaware of his surroundings and the severity of a situation he was
in. Will folded his hands into fists, trying to breathe, desperate to not send himself into a panic.
Upstairs he heard the door open, and then there was a considerate amount of crashing and
footsteps. Will's worry spiked and he rushed upstairs, fearing for the worst and attempting to
prepare himself for that. What he was met with was not expected.

"What..." he couldn't finish the sentence, being able to piece the scene together on his own.

Robin was leaning in the doorway, a goofy smile on her face as she struggled to stay upright.

"Oh my god, Hi!" She slurred out, arms loosely wrapped around Mike's shoulders as she attempted
to wave at him, "I didn't know you two were hanging out, I would have brought the party here!"

"Robin, how did you even get here?" Mike asked, struggling to keep the shorter girl on her feet. He
shuffled away from the door and closed it, almost dropping Robin in the process.

"I drove, obviously."

Will widened his eyes, "you drove like this?"

"Uh yeah?"

"She can't drive, she rode her bike here," Mike said.

Robin stuck her tongue out, "not my fault I failed the test."

"That's the definition of 'your fault'--"

Stepping forward, Will wrapped an arm under Robin's own, easily swinging her into his arms
bridal style. She laughed joyously, clumsily holding onto him as Will walked her into the living
room.

"What do we do with her?" Mike asked.

"How am I supposed to know, she's your friend," Will said, placing Robin onto the couch.

"Fine. Robin, what happened, what are you doing here?"

The girl sighed, leaning against Will's side, "well we were having this great party, right? Then the
worst worst thing happened."

She went silent as both of them stared at her.

"And?" He pressed.

"What?"

Mike sighed, rubbing his temples, "what happened after that, Rob?"

"Oh! Vickie got mad at me, which was totally unfair because I wasn't even doing anything wrong.
Then she tried to get me to go home and there was no way I was doing that, so I ran away."

"How did you even get here in one piece? You're shit-faced," Mike said, leaning back against the
wall and looking towards them.

"Dumb luck."

"What do we do with her?" Will asked, trying to whisper.

Mike shrugged, "I don't know, get her to drink some water or something?"

"Oh great, you're very helpful thank you."

"Don't shit on me, I don't know how to babysit drunk people."

Will rolled his eyes, "and you think I do?"

He very much did, but Mike didn't need to have that information.

"It's not a big deal, she's probably fine--"

"Well should I drive her home?"

Mike shook his head, "don't do that, her parents would kill her. We can just drag her upstairs--"

"Hey! I am not going anywhere, I am completely fine to go home, my parents will never know,"
Robin slurred out, rolling onto the floor as she spoke.

"Okay, Rob listen to me, your mom will throw you onto the street--"

She waved him off, "shush, you're too loud."

Will glanced over at Mike, a laugh popping from his lips as he noticed the offended stare on the
elder boy's face.

"What are you laughing at?" Mike asked, looking at him with narrowed eyes.

"Why do you do that with your face?" He got out, "you look like my grandma."

"Shut up I do not."

Will leaned back on the couch, "you do. Come on, do it again and I'll take a picture--"

"I'm not letting you mock me--"

"I am not mocking you, don't be an ass and let me see--"

Mike scoffed, "you're being totally unhelpful right now, you know that?"

"I carried her in here, that's enough--" he cut himself off, looking down and realizing the spot
Robin had been occupying was now empty, "wait, where did she go?"

"What do you mean, she's right--" Mike's eyes widened, "Robin!"

Will stood to his feet, eyes scanning the living room, "Robin, where'd you go!"

"Shit, that little fucking-- okay, she's quick, how long has it been since she stopped talking?"

"I don't know, like thirty seconds--"

"Fuck. Alright come on," Mike said, flipping on every light in sight.

They checked the kitchen first, and Will opened every cabinet, assuming that Robin could turn into
a contortionist when drunk. Confusion filled him when he saw almost every cupboard empty, Will
turned to Mike who was doing the same thing and decided it wasn't a good time to mention it.

"Do you think she tried to go home?" He asked as they hurried to the front door.

"I don't think she'd get very far, come on."

Will went looking through the bushes, hoping Robin hadn't fallen over and passed out like that. He
stood with a huff, walking over to where Mike was scanning the garage.

"Robin!" Mike called out.

"Nothing?" He asked, "you saw her bike, right?"

"Yeah she's still here...or not far."

Will sighed, "Robin come on!"

"At least I'm not looking for you," Mike grumbled, walking around the back.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Mike glanced over at him, "you're a great hider, remember?"

"Well you won't have to worry about that, I don't get drunk."

"Why?"

Will did everything but meet the elder teen's eye, "just uh, not really my thing I guess."

"Ya know, even if you're not shit-faced drunk, I'll still go looking for you."

He felt his heart beat spin out and looked over at Mike, a tiny smile rolling onto his lips. The other
boy met his eye, and Will bumped their shoulder's together.

"I'll go looking for you too," he paused, "but only if you're shit-faced drunk."

Mike laughed, "alright I'll hold you to that."

"Okay, but seriously what the hell are we going to do--"

What sounded like a glass shattering inside rang out. They both looked to one another with rounded
eyes before running back into the house. Robin was right back in the living room, now standing
and staring down at a shattered family picture.

"Oh no..." she breathed out, covering her mouth, "I was just looking at it."

Mike sighed, "Rob it's fine, let's get you to sleep okay? You can have my bed."

Luckily, Robin seemed to be considerably more tired now. Unfortunately, before any of them
could make the trek up to Mike's room, Robin's eye's started to close, knees buckling. Will saw the
glass on the floor and got kicked into action, grabbing the drunk girl before she could hurt herself.

"Shit, okay Mike take her legs," he said, holding under Robin's arms. Mike walked over and lifted
the rest of the piano player. For a moment Will wished that there was someone there to take a
picture, because he was sure it would be quite the sight.

"Okay, watch your step there-- Byers, if you walk us into the wall one more time I'm going to lose
it."

Will huffed, "I'm trying, I can't see-- Mike watch her leg!"

"Whoops."

"Really? Whoops? That's what you're going to say after scolding me?"

Mike sent him a glare, "I'm not holding the important body parts, strong guy."

"What-- her legs are still important, Mike!" He whisper yelled, letting out a breath of relief as they
were finally on the second floor.

"Oh my god I broke a sweat," Mike breathed out, dramatically wiping his head and almost
dropping Robin in the process.
"I'm so sorry to hear that princess," he mumbled, rolling his eyes as he did. It took them a second,
but eventually they were laying Robin across Mike's bed.

"That was horrible."

Will placed his hands on his hips, "yeah. Go get her a water and some Advil or something."

"You want me to walk back down the stairs--"

"Mike, just do it."

The elder boy scoffed and rolled his eyes, marching out of the room with a huff. Will got to work
and yanked off Robin's shoes, tossing a blanket over her. It didn't look very comfortable, but it was
better than nothing.

The girl started shifting around, her eyes opening to slits.

"Hey, you okay?" He asked softly.

She reached out and patted his arm, "hm, I like you. You're a nice one."

Will sent her a grin, "thanks Robin."

"Uh-huh, but..."

"But what?"

She narrowed her stare, "you've got sad eyes..."

Will parted his lips in surprise, but wasn't able to question her before she fell back asleep.
"She owes me for this." Mike said as he walked back into the room, placing a cup of water and two
pills on the bedside table.

They both quietly made their way back down the stairs, any excitement of chasing after a drunk
girl finally gone. Mike went around turning off the main lights, not needing them anymore. Will
went to the living room, crouching down in front of the shattered picture.

It looked like a stock photo, not a hair out of place on anyone. Will brushed off some of the glass
and stared at Mike. It was odd to see him without the wild curls and jewelry. This version of Mike
was in a collard shirt with a knitted sweater over it, hair cut into some weird bob that looked to be
straightened. Next to him was a girl with short brown hair and the perfect smile, her skirt down to
her knees, button up pulled on. Then there was a little blonde girl held in their mom's arms.

"My mom's gonna kill me for that one."

Will jolted in surprise and stood to his feet, picture still in hand, "you can just buy a new frame."

"I kind of just want to burn it," Mike said under his breath, taking the picture, his eyes seeming to
be stuck on something.

"It's not so bad."

The taller boy shrugged, or it resembled a shrug, more so it just looked like Mike got chills and
jolted his shoulders up. Will sat down on the couch, Mike reluctantly following after him.

"My mom used to take me to this god awful barber."

"And he gave you the opposite of a perm?" Will asked.

That got a smile from the other teen, "no, he cut my hair like that and then every morning my mom
would vigorously brush it out and slap some gel in. I looked so stupid, got bullied and everything."
Will looked at Mike in shock, "you?"

"Called me frog face."

Looking at Mike now the insult made no sense, but the picture gave it some ground to stand on.
Will leaned back against the couch, pulling a knee to his chest, eyes trained on the closed-off boy.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Mike asked.

"Just waiting."

"For what?"

"Your backstory, of course."

Mike let out a dry laugh, "I was in band, I would have been more surprised if I didn't get bullied."

"I got made fun of too," he reluctantly admitted.

"What?" Mike turned to look at him, eyes wide.

"You saw those pictures of me, I looked like a baby at the age of thirteen."

"Exactly, so how could anyone make fun of someone as cute as you?" Will's cheeks flushed, but he
didn't say anything, "it's weird we never met."

"Guess so, but I didn't really venture out. Was never good at making friends, had one or two.
Which wasn't great since if I didn't have any friends then neither did Jane."

Mike nodded in understanding, "we would have been good friends."

"Yeah?" He asked, voice pushed out as a whisper.

The elder boy's lips quirked into a smile, "yeah."

Silence overtook the room, both of them sitting with it comfortably. Will pulled his other knee up,
content to just be in Mike's presence.

"What time is it?"

"9:30." Mike said, "want to finish the movie?"

"Not really."

"Wanna play clue?"

He glanced over at Mike, "we don't have enough people."

"We can both just play two characters."

Will chuckled, "yeah, okay."

"Great--"

"But I wanna be Mrs. Peacock."

Mike groaned, "no that's totally unfair, that's my favorite word."

They stood up and started making their way back downstairs. Will mulled on Mike's response for a
moment.
"Peacock?"

Mike smirked, as if he had been waiting for the question: "no, cock--"

"Ew, shut up."

Will had never felt so childlike before, not even when he was an actual kid. The way Mike played
board games was so intense, he'd act out every character and give them accents. Will spent the first
thirty minutes of the game trying not to pee himself at each performance the theatric teen gave. It
took almost two hours for their game to actually finish, but to Will it felt like a few minutes. Mike
was slowly turning out to be one of the best friends he's ever had.

Will didn't quite know if that was a good thing, or a horribly bad thing.
 Chapter 13

"That looks bad."

"It doesn't look bad, this is what it looked like--"

"The colors weren't even gold and black--"

"Yes they were, the colors on his ceiling are gold and black. The part around the organ."

Mike just rolled his eyes, obviously realizing he had been wrong but unwilling to admit it. It was
their third day of attempting to start painting the 'set' for homecoming. So far Will had done all the
work and Mike would merely stand there and make snarky comments.

"Can you help me?" He asked, standing on a tarp as black paint dripped to the ground.

The elder boy scrunched his nose up in distaste, "I don't want to get paint on my flannel."

"Why are you even wearing a flannel? It's hot outside," he muttered, turning back to the large board
of wood. They had to do everything in the theater since every other place in the school was
occupied.

"Because I look good in flannels-- you missed a spot up there."

Will looked at the other with a glare, "I was getting to it."

"So snappy today."

"You're not helping me."

"And whiny," Mike added, an easy smile gracing his features. Something about the elder teen was
so childlike, he was sitting on the ground with his legs crossed, arms stretched out behind him.
Will wanted to be angry, or even irritated, but it was hard to look at Mike's slightly pinkened
cheeks and feel anything but amusement.

"I'm taking all the credit for this," he grumbled out, turning back to continue painting over the
board.

Mike didn't seem affected by his threat, "so I invited Jane to come to our gig Friday."

There was a tumbling drop in Will's stomach when he heard that, and his hand flinched. Though it
was slight, unnoticeable by the person causing his distress. His face was stagnant, and the half
painted board in front of him began to morph into some kind of mirror, one Will wanted to look
away from. He'd never liked the color green on himself.

"Oh?" He got out, voice even.

"Yeah, she was talking about how she had nothing to do since you guys had a game and
everything. Are you...okay with that?"

Will kept his eyes forward, "of course, why wouldn't I be?"

"I don't know, just wanted to make sure."

He didn't say anything, watching as the brush in his hand made ominous streaks across the board.
The black slowly covered any sign of wood. Will needed to pull his hand away, knowing it was
time to start on the gold. In that moment, the color felt so far away, untouchable. So, he continued
swiping the black paint around, much too terrified to move on.

"I uh, I didn't-- we're just friends, I didn't ask her out or anything--"

"You should," he said quickly.

Mike's eyes were burning into the side of his head, "what?"
"Ask her you. You should, if you want, go ahead," he cleared his throat and put the paint brush
down right between where he and Mike were situated.

"You want me to ask out your sister?"

Will cleared his throat, "I don't really care what you do, it's none of my business."

"Why are you being like this?" Mike asked, standing up.

"Being like what? You asked me a question and I answered it," he said calmly, as if he'd stood in
the mirror and practiced the line over until it felt like dust in his mouth.

"No, you're being--" Mike waved his hand around, "I don't know, if something is bothering you
just tell me."

Will grabbed a towel and wiped off his hands, "if there was something wrong, don't you think I'd
tell you--"

"I really don't think you would."

He tightened his lips into a line, "if you don't trust me that's not my problem--"

"I never said I didn't trust you--"

Will scoffed, "you literally just did. I'm not upset, Mike. My sister can do whatever she wants. Is
there something else you'd like me to say? Want me to tell you that I don't think it's okay that you
invited her?"

"If that's how you feel, then yes."

"Why do you care so much about how I feel? It doesn't matter--"

Mike cut him off, "it matters to me, okay? So if something about this is making you uncomfortable
then just fucking say that, because I don't want to deal with you being pissed at me--"

"Oh I'm sorry you feel like you have to deal with me--"

"Would you just let me speak?" Mike snapped.

"This conversation is stupid, I don't care what you do or who you invite to things. I said it was fine,
so it's fine," he said calmly, voice not wavering for even a moment. Will felt something pounding
on the inside, screaming to be let go. Though, no matter how much he'd like to let that person out,
Will didn't have the key.

Mike scoffed, turning around and grabbing his bag from the ground. Will crossed his arms, holding
them tightly in anguish. He wanted to open his mouth, say something else or apologize; but his lips
were sewed closed. Apparently the only thing Will was good for was shutting up and hiding.

"Fine, whatever. I gotta go," Mike mumbled, eyes not meeting Will's as he walked out of the
theater.

The door closed, leaving Will alone on the stage. It reminded him of a musical scene for a moment,
but for him there wasn't a spot light or a crowd to follow along with his story. He was met with
dreary silence and a barely flickering overhead light. He stared at where Mike had left, tears of
frustration burning in his eyes.

"You're so stupid." He breathed out, voice almost silent. Will sucked in a trembling breath and took
a step back, silently cursing as he knocked over the tin of black paint, "shit, shit shit."

Will bent to his knees, tipping the tin back up in an attempt to save it. Sadly, it was too late and his
hands were quickly becoming covered in the dark paint, the color dripping down his wrists.
Dropping his hands onto the tarp, Will glanced over to the untouched tin of gold paint. It was
gleaming in the light, mocking him, almost daring him to come closer and ruin it's perfection with
his damaged hands.

He couldn't do it, no matter how much he might wish to.

Sitting on his knees, tears visible in his eyes, Will scrubbed at his hands; but even as he left the
theater, turning off the shadowed light, the paint left splotches in his skin, reminding him it
wouldn't be going anywhere.

----------

"What's with you?"

Will glanced up, "what? nothing."

They were sitting at lunch, but Will didn't have any desire to eat. When it was nice out they all
tried to sit outside, usually it was refreshing, but in that moment the fresh air felt suffocating.

Steve bit into a carrot, eyes narrowed, "you sick or something?"

"No I'm not sick."

Chrissy leaned closer and rested a hand on his forehead, "yeah not sick, fail a test last period?"

He sighed, "I'm just tired, nothing is wrong I promise."

It was a robotic response, one Will has said so many times it spilled out without thought. Even if
he wanted to spill his problems out, let his friends into his head, it felt impossible. Will didn't quite
know what to do with himself, he couldn't speak, but when he did it always felt like he was saying
the wrong thing.

Lucas nudged their shoulders together, "did you pull something yesterday?"

That was his out, "yeah maybe, didn't really stretch."

"You gonna be okay Friday?" Dustin asked.

"Yeah." Will sent them a smile, forcing his lips to twist upwards. It was stupid, but he wanted
someone to notice, ask him what was wrong one more time, because maybe then he could figure it
out for himself.

The lunch period dragged on and Will barely touched his food. It didn't feel right to put anything in
his stomach, he'd never been good about taking care of himself when people were unhappy with
him. It was pathetic.

"Did Jane tell you?" Chrissy asked with a happy grin as they walked back into the school.

Will swallowed, "about what?"

"About Mike inviting her to their gig, she's borrowing my green dress. You know the one with the
thin straps?" He nodded, "well I think it'll look great on her, she wants to add a sweater over it, but
I think wearing something like that will get her out of her comfort zone a little."

"I got home late last night, so we didn't get the chance to talk." Will shoved his hands into the
pockets of his jeans, "she's excited?"

"Hasn't stopped talking about it, he's picking her up and everything. I bet she'll tell you all about it
later or something."

Will nodded, eyes trained forward, "yeah, can't wait."

"Maybe you should go to the nurse or something," Chrissy said.

"What?"

She patted his arm, "you look really tense, was it your shoulder?"

"Oh, no I'm really fine, don't worry about it."

"Okay well, if it gets worse let me know, I have some pain relief in my bag."
Will glanced to the shorter girl, sending her a smile, wondering if she could see the swimming guilt
behind his eyes, "thanks."

They separated, walking to their respective classes, leaving Will alone. People moved through the
hall, not paying him an ounce of attention, his face fell, there was no one there to hide from
anymore. Will should apologize, do something to prove to Mike that he didn't care, he was utterly
terrified he'd end up ruining his sister's happiness because he didn't understand himself.

Will wasn't sure he processed anything that happened in the day. He followed the routine, doing
everything he was supposed to, saying the right things until he ended up driving away from the
school. Practice had dragged on, meaning the sun was already getting ready to go down as he drove
home. Unlike most, Will never listened to music in the car, eyes trained on the road in silence.

Sometimes he'd talk to himself, as if he could be his own therapist. It never worked and usually
made everything worse, but it was addictive to send his head into a spiral. For now though, Will
listened to the engine, questioning every few seconds if it would detach itself from the vehicle.

He pulled into the driveway, ready to slink inside and pass out. Will dragged himself out of the car,
but stopped short when he saw a familiar car parked, his stomach sinking as realization came. Will
stared for a moment, not knowing if he was prepared to walk into the house.

Eventually, he didn't have another choice, head immediately aching as he walked inside and heard
laughter spilling from the living room. Unmoving, he listened, picking out the rhythm of Mike's
voice with ease. The way he laughed was unique, or Will thought it was at least. Mike only ever
laughed when he felt genuine joy, never faking one for the amusement of others. It was a good
thing, but in that moment Will saw the green start to slink up his still stained hands.

"Mom? Is that you?" Jane called.

Will pressed his eyes shut, "uh no, it's me."

"Hey! Mike's here by the way, we're working on math."

He clenched his jaw, forcing any emotion to drop off. Will turned the corner, backpack falling off
his shoulder. they were both seated on the ground, books scattered around. He crossed his arms,
firmly pressing his pointer finger and thumb together.
"How was practice?" Jane asked with a smile, seeming to be completely oblivious to the awkward
tension in the room.

"It was fine, I see you two have been busy." Will said, trying to keep his voice light. He knew Mike
was staring at him, but kept his eyes directed at Jane.

"Yeah well I've been struggling with this lesson and didn't have a ride home, Mike offered to study
with me," Jane had a blush on her face, the smile looking so painfully bright.

He nodded, "good. Yeah um, I'll just leave you to it then."

Jane sent him another grateful grin, obviously appreciating his quick departure. Will rolled his lips
together and turned to the hallway, Jane's whispered voice picking back up. As he was about to
walk out of sight, he couldn't help but turn his gaze back to the two, only to find a pair of dark eyes
already searching for him. They locked together, Jane's voice turning into brown noise in the
background. Will stood silently, hoping Mike could see his apology, praying that he was
screaming loud enough.

For a split moment, Mike's brows pinched together, something akin to beautiful agony before he
turned away, leaving Will wrung dry. He left the room, walking farther into the dark hallway,
every light off.

He didn't bother turning any of them on, blindly finding the way to his room. Will gripped the
handle tightly, closing the door with a gentle push. Swallowing a total of three times, he tried to
push away the lump surging in his throat.

Sitting down on the ground, Will stared at the wall, eyes tracing the dent made by the door handle.
He remembered when it happened, still surprised the handle hadn't flown right through the paper
thin wall. Part of him wished it had, their was only a tiny divot in the four walls he kept himself in,
no way for anyone to peak in at him without his awareness.

"Shut up," he whispered, bringing his hands up to cover his ears, "just shut up, shut up."

Will clenched his teeth, listening to them grind together as he tried to force away noise. Sadly, each
sound was coming from within his mind. He either removed his hands and had to listen to Jane and
Mike's laughter, or he covered them up and had to listen to himself.
He didn't know which one was worse.

With a stuttering breath, he dragged himself up and grabbed an old turquoise blanket, wrapping it
around his shoulders. He laid down on his bed, curled into a ball, body turned and facing the wall.
Will never slept with his back turned to it, the window wasn't a safe thing for him to look out.
Watching the sunset had always been one of his favorite things to do, but he never did that in his
room, he couldn't. The window was safe, an escape that would keep him protected. Doors were
supposed to be safe as well, keep everyone and everything out. They were knights to steer away the
bad things.

But his never had been very good at its job.

 Chapter 14
Chapter Notes

Forgotten (Lorne Balfe)

Mike shoved a hand into his hair, attempting to loosen some of the curls. It didn't change anything,
never really did. At this point, it was just some habit, one built from nerves. He took a step back
from the mirror, examining himself. Mike rolled up the sleeves of his black and grey baseball T-
shirt. He'd never liked the name, always feeling out of place on his tongue, but the cut was
something Mike always found flattering.

With a huff, he let his hand fall, eyes trained on himself. Mike couldn't focus, it was like something
was weighing on his brain and making it impossible for him to get into a good headspace. He
needed to go pick up Jane in a few minutes and go to the gig, so whatever slump he'd gotten
himself in needed to end.

On the count of three, he sharply turned to the door and yanked it open, propelling himself down
the stairs. Mike's hands fluttered over the keys to his motorcycle, but stopped. Something about it
felt too personal, like he'd be popping his bubble and allowing Jane to slide into it. Besides, she
might hate motorcycles. With that thought in mind, he picked up the car keys and walked outside.

He didn't live far from the Byers' house, but Mike drove slowly. He felt stupid, like he had ruined
everything for no reason. Will had said it was fine, that nothing was wrong. No matter if Mike
knew that was a lie or not, he should have just gone with it. Sadly, he didn't know how to keep his
mouth closed. Just kept talking when all he wanted to do was shut up. It was a curse.

Mike didn't even have to pick up his phone when he pulled up to the house, Jane already running
from the front door. He smiled, unlocking the car so she could slide in.

"Hi!" She said, voice tinted with excitement.

"Hey, I like your dress," he smiled. Jane looked nice in green. It was one of his favorite colors
though, so he usually thought anything and everything looked nice in green.

"Oh thanks, Chrissy gave it to me," Jane buckled, brushing through some strands of hair with her
fingers, "and it's usually not really my look, but I wanted to do something different."

Mike pulled out of the driveway, "well it might get chilly, so if you need a jacket or something just
let me know."

He glanced over at her, getting stuck on her eyes. They were brown. She had a similar shade to his
own.

"Thanks, I appreciate it," she said, her voice smaller and more timid.

Mike sent her a nod, looking back at the road, "yeah no problem. So, you didn't wanna go to the
football game?"

She shrugged, "not really, it's away and I don't wanna have to go up there with them and then sit
alone. I usually don't go to their away games."

"Does it-- like, is it dangerous? I've only ever been to one football game." He gripped the wheel
tighter, ignoring the stare she was sending him.

"Oh um, I guess so. I hate that Will does it, always have. My mom hates it too." Jane sighed, "I
don't know, he doesn't like getting handsy, so I've never actually seen him run up and tackle
someone."

"Don't you have to do that in football?"

"I guess not, he's gotten into tackles before. I don't like watching that, but he's really fast. Usually
gets out of doing anything crazy."

Mike nodded in understanding, following along with her explanation. Now that he knew Will, the
idea of the younger boy doing anything dangerous sent a sharp nerve down his spine. Will with his
soft smile and kind stare. His eyes that always left Mike completely stumped. There was something
special about them, and if he focused enough they became clear in his head.

Will had hazel eyes, the green popping out when they were under the light or he was seated close
to lamps. Mike wanted someone to study them, to take them under a microscope and dissect every
single color that may pass by, no matter how miniscule it might be. Someone with Will's eyes
shouldn't be doing something so reckless.

"I worry about him."

Mike's brain snapped back, "what?"

"Will, he doesn't talk about anything, makes me nervous. He's been really quiet this week and
won't tell me why. I mean, he's not very open with anyone so I'm not surprise or anything, but he's
my brother and I feel like it's my job to look out for him and he won't even let me do that. It's
infuriating," she paused, "sorry, I didn't mean to--"

"No, no it's fine I get it." Mike's knuckles were white now. They had their little disagreement on
Monday, and a nagging feeling bit at his heart, telling him it was his fault Will was being closed
off.

"Does he say anything to you?"

"Huh?"

Jane folded her arms, getting comfortable, "I mean you guys are friends right? You seem to be
getting pretty close."

"Oh, yeah I mean-- yeah we're friends. He hasn't told me anything."

Mike pulled into parking lot right outside the garage, heart racing. Questions pounded at his head
frantically. Jane said they looked close, and Mike didn't know why that made his palms sweat, as if
he had been caught committing some kind of heinous crime. Will was his friend, there was no
reason to be sent into a panic by someone's innocent observation.

"Mike, you okay?" Jane pressed, resting a hand on his shoulder. He turned to her, seeing the way
her brows creased with worry, "you kind of froze up..."
"I'm okay, sorry, just nervous."

She deflated, "oh good-- I mean not good that you're nervous, I just thought it was something else
or that you were going into some kind of cardiac arrest."

He let out a laugh, the tension falling from his body. Jane was nice, he liked her. She was able to
be funny without making an effort.

Shared that quality with her brother.

"Alright, you ready to go?" He said, hopping out of the car, walking over to pull Jane's door open
instinctively. Eddie made fun of him for the habit. Years ago Mike had gone on auto pilot and ran
over to open the door for the drummer and hasn't heard the end of it.

"Thanks," Jane smiled at him, a light blush on her cheeks. That color along with the dress made her
look like Christmas.

They walked into the venue, pushing through the crowds of people to get backstage. He held out
his arm and let Jane latch onto it so she didn't get lost.

"Wheeler!" Eddie sang out dramatically as he walked into the room, "and Jane, how are you
ma'am?"

Jane laughed softly, "hi Eddie."

"It's so brave of you to ditch your brother and shit to come see us, you're my favorite now." Robin
smiled, looking up from her phone.

"That means a lot thanks. Do guys always have this many people coming to see you?"

Mike nodded, sitting down to tune his guitar, "usually yeah."

"I keep expecting everyone to get sick of us," Max said, walking into the room with a water bottle
in hand.

"I doubt that's gonna happen."

Max sent the younger girl a smile, "thanks, I'm glad you made it."

"Me too."

They talked for a little longer, the conversation light. Mike mostly kept to himself, mind still
drifting in directions he didn't want it to be going. Unfortunately, he seemed to be losing control
over everything. It was a slow process, but he could feel his sanity creeping out.

Walking onto stage, it felt robotic. He glanced at Jane who was stood in the crowd, a cup clenched
in her hand. Robin did her little intro and Mike walked up. It was hard to see any of the faces, the
light shining too bright for him to make anyone out. Sometimes those kinds of nights were his
favorite; feeling completely disconnected from the outside world.

His mouth moved, but he couldn't hear the lyrics coming out of it. Mike shifted his eyes to the
side, having a sense of Deja vu. He vividly remembered the first night he'd seen Will, it was like
something in his world stuttered, something clicking. Now he stared at the empty spot in the
corner, almost expecting the quiet boy to be standing there, staring at him with those magnetic
eyes.

Once their set ended, Mike wiped away the sweat from his brow. He locked his guitar away, ready
to get off stage and away from the eyes on him. Mike liked attention, usually, but in that moment it
felt suffocating.

"That was great!" Jane yelled, her smile pulling brightly.

"Thanks," he said, sending her the best grin he could muster. She didn't seem to notice how off it
must have looked.

"I could never imagine doing something live like that, freaks me out," she took a sip of her drink,
"but I also have stage fright."
"We've gotta get you on stage then little Byers." Eddie walked by and ruffled the girl's hair,
throwing an arm around Mike's shoulder.

"God no--" Jane was cut off by her phone going off, though it was barely heard in the loud room.
She glanced down, her expression pinching, "hello?"

Mike watched with hawk eyes, noticing how her expression continued to fall. He glanced at Eddie,
seeing the other picked up on the change as well.

"Wait Lucas stop, what do you mean? So is he-- okay what do you mean he got hurt? How did he
get hurt?" Mike's stomach dropped, "holy shit, you're kidding-- okay is he-- what do you mean he
was only unconscious-- okay, yeah you brought him home? Yeah I'll be there soon."

She turned off the phone, her hands shaking. Mike's heart was racing with anticipation, it was
something he'd never felt before, the pure fear and anxious worry coursing through him.

"What happened?" He rushed out, crowding into Jane's space and placing a hand on her arm, "is
someone hurt?"

"Do we need to take you to the hospital or something?" Eddie asked, voice soft with concern.

Jane let out a trembling breath, her hands quivering, "um n-no nothing like that, the game was
rough and usually it's not-- apparently someone tackled Will when he wasn't paying attention,
Lucas said he wasn't focused tonight, I don't know. Knocked him out for a few minutes, he said
everything is fine and it's just-- Will, he just has a mild concussion, but his back is covered in
bruises. God he's so s-stupid--"

"Hey, it's okay," Mike said, pulling her into a tight hug, being able to see the tears in her eyes. He
squeezed her, hoping the younger girl wouldn't notice how bad his arms were shaking.

"Hey you just take her home, I'll grab your stuff." Eddie cut in, patting his shoulder. Mike sent his
friend a thankful smile before slowly pulling out of the hug and rummaging through his back
pocket.

Jane didn't say anything as he guided her outside and into the car, her hands folding together. He
continuously looked over at her as he drove, trying to use the brunette girl to hide away from his
own fears. Mike wasn't by any means strong or athletic, but he'd gladly punch whoever decided to
use Will's body for tackle practice.

The ride felt long, but eventually he was pulling into the driveway, two other cars now sitting
there. Jane rushed out, Mike not far behind her.

"Hello?" Jane called out as they walked inside.

Lucas walked into the hallway and over to them, "hey, you okay?"

She nodded, "is he alright?"

"He's fine, being real fucking stubborn though," Lucas said with an eye roll.

"What's wrong?" Mike asked, not knowing if he should be unsettled by the other teen's lack of
confusion over his obvious worry.

"Well, he's got bruises covering his back and--"

"I can just do it myself--"

"Will, you can't even reach your back stop being an ass," Steve's voice faded into the living room.

"I don't need any help."

Lucas sighed, "that, he keeps doing that."

"Alright I'll deal with him, you guys can head home," Jane said.

"We don't want to leave you two alone, I know your mom is working late--"
Mike cut him off, "I can stay with them."

"Really?" Lucas asked.

He shrugged, "yeah sure, you do kind of look like shit, Sinclair."

Lucas huffed out a laugh, "thanks, man. I'll go grab the Dustin and Steve."

With that, things picked up and Mike found himself sitting in the living room, eyes trained down.
The other three boys had left, giving him muttered goodbyes as they went. Jane went into Will's
room, and he couldn't bring himself to follow.

The house went quiet, and Mike found himself wandering around, gazing over the pictures in the
room. None of them looked staged or overly professional, there was true joy in each person's face,
all of them huddled together lovingly. Mike felt a smile pulling on his lips as he stopped in front of
a photo of Will. He couldn't have been older than five or six, a bright smile was lighting his face. It
was so innocent, reaching his eyes with an ease Will didn't seem to know anymore.

Mike felt an itch in his fingers to reach up and trace Will's face, to take in every ounce of story he
possibly could. No matter how much the younger boy had changed, the kindness Will exuded was
still very much present. A beautiful soul.

When the bedroom door closed, Mike spun around, seeing Jane walking out with tired eyes.

"Everything okay?"

She jumped, "oh you stayed."

"Do you want me to go--"

Jane cut him off, "no actually, unless you want to. I'm exhausted and he's being just-- could you try
talking to him? I know how he gets about being touched, but I can't deal with it anymore."
"Yeah, of course." Mike said, acting like nerves weren't swimming in his stomach.

The drained girl sent him a tiny smile before disappearing into her own room at the end of the hall.
Mike swallowed, staring at the haunting door, light illuminating under it. He knocked softly.

"Jane, just go to sleep I'm fine--"

"It's me," he said, voice razoring on the edge of a whisper.

Their was a beat of tense silence.

"Oh."

"Can I come in?"

"Yeah."

Mike carefully opened the door, listening as a squeak rang out through the quiet house. Will's room
was pretty small, but there was a warmth to it. There were two lamps on, one right by the bed and
one in the left corner. It was oddly blank, Mike thought he'd get an explosion of personality, but he
got no insight into Will's brain other than the rundown desk in the corner. Mike could see a few
scattered notebooks and drawings around, messy paints falling close by.

"What are you doing here?" Will asked, causing his attention to focus in on the boy.

"I..." he trailed off, not being able to finish the meaningless sentence. Will was sitting on his bed,
shirt thrown off. Mike's lips parted as a breath escaped. Will's skin was tanned, basked in a sunlight
he never seemed to step into. He was strong, buffer than Mike would have thought him to be. He
ran his eyes down the younger boy's stomach, taking in each divot, every single detail he could
possibly absorb.

"Mike?" Will's soft voice rang out.

He cleared his throat, looking off to the side, "I-- your sister wanted me to check on you."

"I'm fine."

"So I've heard." Mike built up the courage to glance back at the stubborn teen, their eyes catching.
A string tied between them, and if Mike looked hard enough he could see it morphing together,
making it impossible for him to care about anything but the exhausted boy in front of him. He
wondered what color it would be.

"Well, do you want something then--"

"Will."

The boy visibly swallowed, "what?"

"Stop being like that," he pressed.

"Being like what? I'm not doing anything--"

"You're lying to me. You think I can't tell? You're not fine, I know you're not fine. I'm not saying
you have to tell me why, but just...just let me help you," he walked forward, "please."

Mike crouched down, noticing that Will lost a considerable amount of tension once they were
level. Equal.

"Okay," Will whispered.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."
He sent the younger teen a timid smile, "can you scoot up and turn around?"

It took a moment, but slowly Will did as he was told. Mike's eyes widened when he was met with
the injury. The tanned skin was littered in bruises, some of them already turning blue or purple.
Will was tense, every muscle in his body looked inflamed. He didn't say a word and sat down on
the bed, feeling it squeak under the pressure of them both. Mike reached out and grabbed the bottle
of lotion.

"You sure you don't want to get this checked out--"

"No, no I've had--" Will cut himself off, "it's fine. I just bruise easily."

Mike nodded, even though he knew the other boy couldn't see him. Trying to keep himself steady,
he reached over and reluctantly started to pull some of his rings off.

"Can you keep them on?" Will spoke up, voice quivering. Mike looked up and saw the stiff teen
glancing over his shoulder. He was about to question it, try and explain that the hard metal would
probably make it all worse; but Will had a look he'd never seen before, one of unhidden fear, back
flexed in a way that showed Mike every single cut muscle.

"Okay." Mike pushed them all back on, the comfortable weight resting on his fingers. He poured
the lotion on his hand and scooted closer, "is it alright if I touch you now?"

Will didn't make a sound, but gave a short nod. Mike pressed his eyes closed for a moment.

"Can you tell me with words, please?"

"Yes," the boy breathed out, voice nearly impossible to hear.

Mike nodded and raised a hand up, tentatively pressing it against Will's warm skin. Almost
immediately, Will tensed. Keeping his hand still, Mike shifted an inch closer, his touch light.
"If you want me to stop, tell me," he said, "I don't want to hurt you, okay?"

"I know," Will choked out, but Mike knew he was telling the truth. For once, he was given the raw
and unscripted truth.

Attempting to swallow down the lump in his throat, Mike slowly moved his hand, becoming drunk
on the way Will began to relax under his touch. He wanted to speak, ask if the rings were cold, ask
anything that might break through the drowning tension. Mike became entranced by his fingers
gliding over Will's multicolored skin. It was addicting, a lightning bolt stabbing his hand every few
seconds.

Will's skin was soft, so warm and mind-bending. He could feel the built muscle with every move,
the lotion sinking into the bruises. Mike listened to each breath Will let out, tiny gasps that left his
heart beating a little faster each time. He ran his fingers up the younger boy's spine slowly,
watching as they went. Will sucked in a shaky puff of air, skin becoming prickled with
goosebumps.

"It's alright, by the way." Mike got out, not caring about how uneven his voice came out.

"What?"

He traced a circle on Will's back, "about what happened Monday, it's okay. I'm not mad, I'm sorry."

Will turned, glancing at him from over his shoulder. Mike raised his eyes, chin still dipped down
as he was hypnotized by his own movements.

"How did you know I was even sorry?" Will teased.

Mike didn't bother saying a word, reaching his unoccupied hand up and running a thumb under the
hazel eyes he'd taken the time to study. Will's stare became glazed for a moment, a look of pure
relief overtaking his face.

"I wanted to say it," the boy said shakily, turning his head forward as if he was in pain.
Mike rested his chin on Will's shoulder, "you can say it."

"I should have said it then, I should have--"

"It's okay, you can say it now," he whispered, stomach aching as he heard Will in fight with
himself. "Tell me now, I'm listening."

"I'm sorry."

Mike closed his eyes, "it's okay."

"I-It's not--"

"It's okay."

Will's head turned again, their faces now inches apart. Mike was fearful that the boy could hear his
heart racing, but didn't dare move. Will's eyes were on him, their breaths mingling together and
causing every hair on Mike's skin to rise. With little fight, his gaze darted down to Will's parted
lips, noticing the spit coating them. A terrifying urge came over him, he wanted to lean forward,
desperate to feel something he'd always thought was forbidden. A touch that wasn't allowed in his
life.

He dragged a trembling hand up, delicately resting it on the back of Will's neck. The touch was
burning, as if it was testing Mike, trying to see if he was foolish enough to pull away.

Their chests heaved together, and Mike pinched his brows, trying to get Will to understand his
confused pleading. Without a restraint, he tangled his fingers in the drunk looking boy's hair,
tightening the hold and pulling him closer until their foreheads were brushing.

Mike released a puff of air, allowing it to drawl out. That string he had felt earlier was tightening,
new strands coming together and squeezing around their necks; but Mike didn't feel pain, didn't
register any discomfort from the forceful pull. He ran his ringed hand down Will's arm, being
reminded that he was not seated next to a girl, nothing about Will was like a girl.
He had a light stubble, strong jaw, boyish, ruffled hair. He smelled vaguely of sweat and rubbed off
cologne. He was sitting there shirtless, displaying the hard muscles he had gained from years as an
athlete. Will wasn't anything like a girl. Mike felt tears welling up in his eyes and he grasped the
boy tighter. The boy. A boy. Will's a boy.

Mike peeled his eyes open, something beginning to snap inside of him when he found Will already
staring, his eyes free of the jail they were usually locked in. With a pained swallow, Mike's lashes
fluttered and he tilted his head to the side, pulling, desperate -yet hesitant- to have Will close.

"Tell me to stop..." he breathed out, chest continuously doing deep dives as his lips were were
seconds away from skimming against Will's own.

"I..." Will gasped.

"Tell me to stop, Will...tell me to stop," he pleaded, hand running down and gripping the boy's
waist.

"Mike...Mike." Will's voice was so shaking he barely understood, but the younger teen's strong
hand found his cheek, and the snapping branch inside of him took another hit.

"Tell me..."

He could almost taste Will's lips, was so sure he could memorize what they might feel like. Mike
gripped the timid boy's hair tighter just as a door in the hall softly clipped open.

Mike felt like a bucket of ice was poured over his skin. He gasped and stumbled off the bed,
almost falling down onto the carpet as he tried to get away. Everything went dry, his lips losing
any semblance of moisture. He took a scratchy breath and looked at Will with wide eyes, the
younger boy seeming just as terrified as he was. Will's hands were tightly gripping the bed cover,
the hold looking painful.

"S-Shit--"

"We can't-- that was just an accident, alright? It's nothing," Will said, seeming slightly more
coherent.
Mike cleared his throat, fiddling with his hands, "right yeah I'm-- I need to go, I'm sorry I need--
I'm sorry."

He turned out of the room, not waiting for another second before closing the door behind him.
Mike tried to catch his breath as he fumbled for his keys and left the house in a haste. His chest
continued to heave as he took in the night air, falling into his car.

There was silence, and Mike burned his gaze into the steering wheel, something breaking inside of
him. His mind went over what happened, reminding him who he had felt these things for. Mike
wished it felt wrong, he wanted it to all be wrong and for him to hate it. He couldn't.

A choked sob spilled past his lips before he could stop it and be collapsed forward, arms trembling
as he held himself close. Mike closed his eyes, the cries shaking his body and causing pain to well
up inside of him.

"Stupid, you're so s-stupid, stupid-d," he sobbed each word out, his head beginning to hurt as he sat
there desperately trying to comfort himself.

After what felt like long extricating hours, everything drained and Mike was left there curled in a
ball, silent tears rolling down his face as the moon hung high above. He thought of the movies
were people wished on the stars, and in that moment Mike knew if he could have one, he'd go back
and make sure he never met Will Byers. That's what he told himself over and over as he sat alone
in the car. He said it so many times, praying it would all go away.

Mike said it as if he believed, even for a moment, that it wasn't a lie. He'd always been a great liar.
 Chapter 15
Chapter Notes

TW: Signs of abuse. It is not descriptive or explicitly stated.

Days sailed by and Will could barely last a second in the real world. His mind was slowly
becoming warped with fragmented memories. No matter what he did or how hard he tried, he could
feel Mike's hand's on his back, each ring digging comfortably into his skin.

They hadn't worked on anything for homecoming, and Will knew that couldn't go on for long, but
he wasn't ready to break the wall they both had built up. He knew the others had found common
ground, finally working together and getting things done.

Friday had rolled around, and Will was an anxious mess. Earlier that morning he'd seen Mike
walking down the hall and ran to hide in the bathroom, causing him to be late for second period out
of pure embarrassment. He wanted to forget what it felt like to have the elder boy holding him
close, his long fingers tangled in Will's hair, breath ghosting over his lips in the most hypnotic way.
He wanted to forget. Needed to.

Will was in front of his locker, shoving books in that he wouldn't need for the weekend. There were
still a few people meandering through the halls, but it had mostly emptied itself.

"Just ignore them, and he's been an asshole for years." Jane's voice was muffled, but easily
recognizable. Will turned, a question on his tongue. Though it faded off when he saw who she was
talking to.

Once again, he almost turned and ran away. That was until he noticed Mike's folded posture, his
head bent and shoulders pulled tight.

"He probably won't say anything again--"

"What happened?" Will asked, closing his locker. Jane didn't seem surprised by his presence,
probably on the way over to him already, but Mike jolted, eyes going wide as if he'd been caught in
the act.
"Jason's just being an asshole, you know," Jane said, "he's just bored I bet."

That wasn't a satisfying answer, "what did he do? Did he say something to you?"

"He asked Mike--"

"It's nothing," the taller boy said. Will focused in on him, momentarily forgetting their
awkwardness.

Mike was leaned against the locker not far from Will's, Jane standing next to him. She sent him a
pushing glance, which Will easily took.

"What did he ask?"

The curly-headed teen finally looked up, their eyes locking. Will did everything in his power not to
gasp, feeling like someone had taken his brain out and was now spinning it around. Like a top. He
forced himself to focus, taking in every detail of Mike's face. There was a slight crease between his
forehead, lips bitten.

"He just-- it's not a big deal--"

Jane nudged the boy's shoulder, "come on, just tell him."

"It's fine, he just 'doesn't like my jewelry' or some shit."

"What?" Will asked, feeling an odd bubble boiling in the pits of his stomach, one he hasn't felt in
years.

"Says I look girly," Mike muttered, eyes casted down once again. It seemed as if the weight behind
those short words ran deeper than either of them knew, "it's fine, not a big deal."
"He's definitely just jealous. Literally no one at school wants to go out with him, and looking girly
is fine because he's really just calling you pretty," Jane rambled. They both turned to look at her.

"Thanks, Jane."

She sent Mike a bright smile, cheeks flushed, "you're welcome."

Will folded his arms, suddenly feeling as if he was intruding, "I'm just gonna go if you're--"

"We're going to a party tonight, Eddie invited us," Jane said.

He nodded, "okay, have fun."

"No, you're coming too. He invited all of us, even Steve." Will glanced at Mike who was pointedly
not looking at him, "can you please come? Mom will be mad at me for going without you."

Clearing his throat, Will rolled his hand into fist, "right, fine."

"Thank you!" Jane said cheekily, walking into his arms and holding him tight. The embrace was
comforting, the shield his arms could never quite provide. Will cupped the back of her head,
allowing himself to squeeze her. "Okay, we're gonna go study, but we'll meet you there?"

Will bit down on the skin inside of his mouth, wanting it to bleed, "yeah, see you there."

He looked towards the floor as Mike and Jane walked past him. Will counted his short breaths, but
they stopped as his arm brushed against the elder boy's. It was mere seconds, the contact
accidental; but Will's uncovered skin burned, pulsed with an intensity that he didn't try to shake off.
Subconsciously, he tensed his muscles, eyes gazing upwards. For a split second, he found Mike,
eyes tying together. He wanted to reach out and yank Mike towards him, beg the taller boy to talk
to him.

Will didn't have the confidence to ever do that. So, when Mike looked away, Will followed. He
listened as Jane's voice faded off down the hall, and he just stood there. Stood there with a
wavering responsiveness, he prayed someone would try to shake him out of; but no one was there.
Not enough to see him at least.

"Stupid," he muttered to himself. Will tightened the straps on his backpack, slowly making his way
out of the building and regretting ever saying yes to Jane.

----------

At nine o'clock Jane sent him a address and soon after that Will found himself in the middle of a
raging house party. He had barely walked through the door before an arm was being tossed over
his shoulder.

"Byers!" Lucas said, voice much too loud for how close he was standing.

Will flinched, "are you already drunk?"

The boy laughed, "you know that girl Robin?"

"Yes I know Robin--"

Lucas dragged him over to a couch in the corner, "she makes the most amazing drinks, completely
rocked my shit."

"What was in it?" He asked, letting Lucas drag him down onto the beat up piece of furniture.

"Uh...something with vodka."

Will rolled his eyes, "you're going to vomit, you can't hold that stuff down."

"Chrissy had it first--"

"She's drunk too?" He asked with widened eyes, "Lucas, where is she?"
"It's okay, she's with Steve and Dustin," Lucas said, resting his head on Wills shoulder, "and
Eddie."

He felt like he was in some alternate dimension, "what the hell are they doing with Eddie?"

"Drinking contest."

"Jesus," he muttered.

Will moved his eyes around the room, trying to focus on faces in the dim light. People were
dancing, or trying to at least, bobbing their heads to the obnoxiously loud music. Lucas was
humming to it, hair now brushing against Will's chin.

"Have you seen Jane?"

"She's here with Wheeler somewhere."

He clenched his jaw, "right, forgot about that."

"How's your back?" Lucas asked, seeming to be sober enough to hold a conversation.

Will shrugged, "not too bad."

"If you'd just let people put the cream on, the bruising might actually go down."

"My mom did it," he said, looking down at Lucas with a tiny smile.

"Well she needs to do it again, because I saw your back at practice yesterday and it looks like
someone beat the shit out of you," Lucas muttered. He'd always been a very calm person when
drunk, wanting to curl up and sleep over anything else. Will appreciated it.
"It's not too bad."

The other boy glanced at him for a second, a knowing stare in his eye before looking away. Their
conversation faded off.

"Sinclair! Come over here and get another cup!" Robin's voice rang out from the kitchen, causing
Lucas to shoot up.

"You want one?" The boy asked, stumbling to his feet. Will shook his head, the idea of letting an
ounce of alcohol down his throat made him sick. "Well you still gotta come with me."

Will didn't even try to fight as Lucas dragged him along to the kitchen. Though, the moment he
stepped inside, regret took him. Will hadn't expected to be thrown in front of his sister and Mike
leaning against one another, both of them seeming tipsy, Jane significantly more so. She'd never
been able to hold her liquor.

"Byers, you want one?" Robin asked, leaned over a table of cups.

He looked towards her, "uh no."

"Will you came!" Jane said with excitement, as if she hadn't seen him for months instead of a few
hours; but unlike earlier, she didn't leave Mike's side to hug him.

"You told me to." He leaned against the counter, watching as Lucas took the brightly colored drink
Robin handed him. There weren't many people in the kitchen, everyone was now standing in an
oddly shaped circle. Robin was swaying along to the music, cup pressed against her lips. Lucas
stood next to her while Mike and Jane were absorbed in a quiet conversation. Will didn't even dare
to look over at them, knowing the sight wouldn't do anything to help his mood.

"Did you guys see Eddie throwing up outside?" Robin asked with a laugh.

"He's doing what?" Mike said, speaking up for the first time.
The short-haired girl nodded, "yep, lost the bet."

"No shit!" Lucas exclaimed with a whooping laugh, "Steve's never going to shut up now."

Robin scoffed, "I bet Harrington did something to his drink."

"Oh come on, we all know Eddie can't hold anything down," Max's voice cut into the conversation
as she wandered into the room, empty cup in hand.

"How much did he drink?" Jane asked.

Max shrugged, leaning on the counter next to Will, "don't know, but they were doing shots."

"It's going to be a nightmare trying to get him home."

The redhead hummed, "I think Dustin and Steve dragged him to a bedroom or something, Chrissy
is getting water. They're all in trouble for the game now and are trying to 'repair the damages' or
something."

"Heather pissed?" Robin asked.

"Yep, ruined her mom's flower bed."

Jane let out a sharp laugh, causing everyone to look over at her. Will immediately felt something
inside of him crack, but he didn't allow it to show on his face. Jane was holding onto Mike's arm,
her face pressed against his shoulder as the elder boy whispered something in her ear.

"Look at you two, someone needs a picture of that," Max said with a smirk, handing her empty cup
over to Robin.

Jane flushed, "shut up."

Will folded his arms, holding onto them tightly. The sight made him feel sick, and if he tried even
the slightest amount he could feel Mike's hands gripping his hair, warm breath ghosting over every
inch of himself. The thought made him ill now, realizing how horrible he was for thinking such
things. Jane looked happier than she ever had, finally laughing and finding something for herself.

Like usual, Will was being selfish and ruining it.

When Mike glanced over to him, Will didn't even allow them to catch eyes and immediately
looked away, heart racing.

"Come on Byers, aren't you going to give Mike the stern talking to?" Max asked, nudging his arm,
the focus -unfortunately- turning to him.

"Talking to about what?" Mike spoke up, but no one paid him much mind, voice moving with the
music. He was probably too drunk to pay attention.

"I uh, think they'll be fine," he got out, forcing out a laugh that was laced with guilt.

"That's nothing, you've gotta do the whole shebang--"

Robin was cut off as a small group of boys walked in. Will wanted to groan out in frustration when
he recognized them.

Troy had never been a pleasant person to be around, especially not when he was drunk. Trailing
behind him were two others, Will never bothered to figure out their names.

"Hey!" Troy drawled out, an obnoxious smile on his face, "having a mini party in here?"

"Something like that," Lucas muttered, taking another swig of his drink.

The room got uncomfortably silent as Troy pulled a beer out of the fridge. Will hoped he would
just walk out, but that didn't seem to be a plan of his.
"So, what are we drinking?"

"Nothing that would interest you," Robin said with a snarky grin. Lucas and Max laughed shortly
at that, which obviously wasn't what the drunk boy was looking for.

"You really have a shit mouth, don't you Buckley?"

Robin rolled her eyes, "what do you want Troy? You have your drink, now leave."

"Who said I wanted anything? Maybe I just want to hang out," he said, nudging his friend's arm
with a laugh.

"Cut the bullshit," Max crossed her arms, eyes sharp with a glare.

"You got a problem too Maxine? You guys have always been miserable--"

"Troy, just knock it off," he said, desperately wanting to cool down the situation.

When Troy fully turned his attention to him, Will almost regretted speaking up. There was a spark
in the boy's eye, something Will knew too well from their years of schooling together. It was
knowing, almost joyful as if he'd been waiting for this opportunity.

"What are you drinking tonight, Byers?"

He swallowed tightly, "nothing."

"Ah come on, you need to let loose. Here, you can have my drink," Troy said, walking over and
thrusting the bottle in his direction.

Will felt his stomach swoop down, eyes now trained on the bottle moving towards him. He wanted
to step back, run from it, but he was boxed in. Will gripped the edges of the counter.
"Uh no, really I'm good," he got out.

"Come on man, knock it off--" Lucas tried to cut in, but Troy didn't seem to be having any of it.

"What? I'm just trying to be friendly," Troy smirked at him, now standing so close that Will could
smell is reeking breath, "the Byers love their beer, don't they?"

The words were whispered, but Will almost leaned over to vomit from the power they held. Troy
flung an arm around his shoulder, a sick grin on his face.

"Come on, just take it, it's the last one in there."

Will flinched as Troy reached up and patted his cheek. He was mocking him. Will heard other
voices talking, could make out their sharp protests, but he couldn't fully understand a thing.

"You don't like that fucking sound huh? Clean up that mess before your mother sees."

The bottle was still ghosting near him, it was a weapon, one Will thought might kill him if he got
too close to it. The liquid swimming inside the glass was anything but innocent, but yet it didn't
know the horrors it sent Will every time he saw it. He felt Troy's arm move, but the beer barely
jostled.

"I'll leave it when he takes a sip," Troy said, thrusting it closer as Will tried to turn his head to the
side, "come on Byers, you're being a pussy, drink it."

"Miserable little shit! Drink it!"

"I-I don't--"

"Drink it, come one."

"Come on, take a fucking sip, you sensitive wimp."

"Drink it."

"Drink it!"

Will felt tears clouding his eyes, and with a shaky hand he took the bottle. Though, it only lasted a
few seconds before free falling to the ground. Will's hands were trembling so harshly he couldn't
even fully close them. He sucked in a breath, listening as Troy's haunting laugh echoed around him.

"I'm s-sorry," he whispered, crouching down to the floor.

"I'm sorry, please don't tell mom, I'm sorry."

Will reached a hand out, trying to pick up the broken pieces of glass, tears rolling down his face as
he did so. Humiliation ran through his veins, and he didn't even process the sharp edge slicing open
his palm. He didn't care. If he cleaned it up, it would be fine, no one would see it. See him.

"Get the fuck out of here man, what the actual fuck is your problem? Do you think it's fun to play a
goddamn motherfucking game!"

"Mike stop--"

"No! This piece of shit deserves a fucking--"

"It's not worth it, put the damn knife down, come on stop."

Will was frozen, eyes slowly moving up. Through his blurred vision, he saw Lucas and Robin
yanking Mike away from Troy's quickly retreating figure. He didn't look intimidating physically,
but the determination was there, and with a knife in hand that was frightening enough.

"Will, come on it's okay," Max was crouched down next to him, Jane hurrying to the other side of
him, "we'll clean it up, don't worry about it."
He couldn't breathe, everything was too much.

Jane scooted closer, "Will--"

With a sharp gasp he stumbled to his feet, needing to get out. It was impossible to get a full breath
in. He didn't care that blood was running down his hand, all Will wanted to do was get out. He
pushed his way out of the kitchen, not caring as he bumped into people.

Will wasn't sure how he was able to get to the bathroom, but it was a relief. He pushed the door
shut and slowly sat onto the ground, pulling his knees up. He wanted his mind to stop moving, for
the memories to halt and let him be free for once. It was like no matter what he did, it was
impossible to run.

Holding his legs close, Will wiped the tears. He didn't cry, never allowed himself to do that for too
long. In the logical side of his brain he knew it didn't make him a wussy or too sensitive, but the
words stabbed into his skin like unwanted tattoos.

"Will?" A knock ticked at the door.

Keeping his mouth squeezed shut, he hoped the person would walk away. Sadly, he couldn't be
that luckily. The hinges squeaked, and within seconds Mike's tall figure was looming in the
entrance, his face now having lost the heated rage.

"Hey," the elder boy said softly, Mike pressed the door shut and crouched down, sitting in front of
him.

Will followed the line's on Mike's face, taking in every freckle, paying attention to the shape of
each curl that fell in front of the boy's dark eyes.

"Hi," he got out, voice shaking.

"I'm sorry if you didn't-- everyone else was too drunk to really have a full conversation and I didn't
really drink so I thought..." Mike whispered, his voice vanished of any built up wall.
"You didn't have to follow me, I'm fine."

Mike's brows flinched together, "Will come on, talk to me--"

"Talk to you? When has that ever done us any good?" He choked out, tone barely audible.

The elder teen let out a breath through his nose, eyes screwing shut, "can I just see your hand?
Please?"

Will stared for a moment before reluctantly reaching his hand out, staring at the blood. He felt
nothing, it was a numb routine.

"Jesus," Mike muttered, reaching over and wadding up toilet paper, pressing it against the wound.

"It's just a little cut," he said softly, trying to ease Mike's worries.

"Yeah?" Mike looked at him with an easy smile.

Will felt his lip twitching up, "yeah."

After that Mike slowly cleaned him up quietly. It was comfortable, Will feeling safe enough to let
his tight posture release. Eventually, all the blood was gone and whisked away into the trashcan.

"There, good as new."

"Still looks pretty bad." Will left his hand open, voice rough.

Mike scrunched his nose up, "yeah, but there was only one band-aid. I'm gonna have to talk to
Heather about her lack of first aid."

Will let out a snort of laughter, not being able to help himself. The elder boy sat down next to him,
pulling his knees up as well.

"Remember the first time we sat in a bathroom?"

He nodded, "hiding from Steve and Eddie."

"We played twenty questions and you told me you were behind in school--"

"I didn't say that, I just said I wasn't a prodigy."

Mike nudged their shoulders together, "same thing."

"You're an asshole."

"And you're stupid," Mike grumbled out.

Will knew there was no weight behind it, but the word hit something in him. He stared at the door
for a moment, unmoving.

"I know," he choked out. Mike shifted next to him, and Will felt the dark eyes staring at him.

"Will, I didn't actually mean..."

He couldn't hold back the dry sob and quickly brought his hands up, pushing the heels to his eyes.
Will curled forward, trembling breaths falling out.

"I'm stupid," he choked, "I'm so s-stupid."

"Stop," Mike rushed out, quickly wrapping an arm around his shoulder and folding him into a hug.
Will melted into it but still didn't move his hands. When Mike squeezed him, the tears finally
came, and he pressed into the elder boy's arm, wanting the pain to stop.
"I'm sorry--"

A hand carded through his hair, "you don't need to do that, don't do that."

It was a slightly awkward position to be in, but Will didn't care. Someone was holding him, for
once in his life he didn't have to sit around, smile, and tell everyone he was okay. He didn't have to
ask for someone to care about him. Very timidly, he took his hands away and snaked them around
Mike's waist, tugging on him.

"It's okay..." the curly-headed boy whispered into his ear, "you're okay. I'm right here."

"Don't let go."

Mike pulled him closer, "I'm not going to."

The sound of Will's trembling breaths filled the bathroom. Music could still be heard outside, but it
was drowned out behind the sound of Mike's heart beat. He was gripping onto the boy's shirt,
wanting to make sure he was truly there. This was all Will could have, these small moments where
no one was watching. He squeezed his eyes shut at the reminder, pressing his nose against Mike's
collarbone, wanting to have him, even if it was only for a fleeting second.

"I'm sorry," Mike whispered, lips close to his ear. Will could hear the layers of meaning behind the
tiny words. He knew they were all things that couldn't be brought out of the dark.

"Me too."

Mike sniffled, "you know, you're kinda my best friend now."

A watery smile played on his lips, "am I?"

"I think so, and I'm sorry for not...talking to you and stuff this week."
He pulled a hand up and laid it on Mike's chest, linking his pinky around the necklace Mike never
seemed to take off.

"It's okay, I didn't try either."

"You're great by the way," Mike said.

"Is that because I let you recite Shakespeare?" He questioned, voice muffled as his face stayed
pressed against the boy's shoulder.

"Oh you want to hear my Shakespeare?"

Will's eyes widened, "no--"

"With mirth and laughter let old wrinkles come."

A content smile fell on his face, "that's a good one."

"You like it? Not gonna whine?"

He laughed warmly, "no."

"Okay what about this?" Mike cleared his throat, "then hate me when thou wilt; if ever, now; Now,
while the world is bent my deeds to cross--"

Will groaned, "no, please don't that's so long, I can just tell it's long."

Mike rocked him a little, "I gotta get my books back out, need to practice my monologuing skills."

"Luckily, you never shut up so it should be easy-- hey!" He squealed as Mike flicked his head.
"If I memorize a new one you have to listen to it, promise?" Mike asked, but Will heard something
tailing behind it, something deeper.

He lifted his head, their eyes locking, "I promise."

Not another word was said, but Mike's gaze was a book, telling an intricate story that was hidden
from the world.

Will only wished he understood the language.

 Chapter 16
Chapter Notes

Waste A Moment (Kings of Leon)

Mike hadn't expected to ever see Eddie and Steve having a civil conversation. It wasn't on his
bingo card. A tingling part in his mind urged him to interrogate them, but based on the information
given by Max and Jane, the two had just found common ground. Apparently Steve Harrington
loved metal music.

Once they became 'official' friends, the others morphed together as well. Mike liked it, being
around people was like a lifeline to him, the more there were, the less he had to sit alone with his
thoughts. Or sit alone in his house.

After the party fiasco, Mike felt on edge. He remembered how easy it was to grab onto the sharpest
object near him and use it as a threatening tool. It wasn't surprising, Mike knew he was an
impulsive person, never thought much about what he might do next. Seeing Will with fear and
tears in his eyes while he sunk to the ground had broken something in Mike's brain. He couldn't get
the taunting out, the desperation to understand was growing with each day.

Will wasn't an open person, it was nearly impossible to know what he was thinking. He was a
fantastic hider, Jane had been right about that; but that night, Mike saw his exterior crack. The
younger boy didn't like to drink, but the reason behind that was slowly piecing itself together.

It made Mike sick.

"And that's not even the best part, you won't even imagine what-- are you listening to me?"

Mike looked up from his lap and over towards Eddie, "yes."

"Lying shit," the elder boy said.

Rolling his eyes, Mike pushed his guitar to the side. They were supposed to be practicing, but no
one really seemed to have the energy. Homecoming was quickly approaching, the weather
becoming cooler as the date grew closer. That left them scrambling to get everything done and little
time to work on music.

"Look I'm sorry, I'm just tired."

Eddie narrowed his eyes, "something's wrong, what?"

"Nothing is--"

"Come on, man."

He sighed, "Eddie I'm being serious, I'm just stressed and shit."

The long-haired teen slumped onto the ground next to him. They were both waiting for the other
two since they'd gone off to pick up a few pizzas. Usually Eddie was easy to distract when all four
of them were around. When the drummer didn't have more than one person to focus on, it was
difficult to lie.

"I heard about what happened last week. Was waiting for you to talk about it."

His stomach dropped, "it's not really something to talk about."

"Mike, you don't just pull a fucking knife on someone for no reason. What the hell were you
thinking?"

He shrugged, "I wasn't."

Eddie snorted, "guess that makes sense."

For a moment there was silence, both of them staring at the wall covered in posters. Mike focused
on the one in the corner, he'd put it there two years prior. Freddie Mercury had always been
someone he admired, he always looked cool no matter what. The tape holding the picture up
needed to be replaced, it wasn't going to do its job for much longer.
"Didn't know you and Byers were close."

Mike pressed his lips together, "he's my friend."

"You've always been stupid loyal, you know that?" Eddie said, turning to him with a little smile.

"Do you mean I've always been an idiot with no rational thought?"

"Well I didn't want to be mean--"

He nudged the teen's shoulder, "shut up."

"Look I don't know what happened, but it's obviously messing with you. I mean, Max and Robin
talked about it a little, shit it fucked them up too ya know? Max was all shaky after it."

"That's probably cause Will's hand was bleeding, she hates blood."

Eddie nodded, "guess so."

"I mean, Will and I are close, I care about him. I'm just worried."

"Has he been acting weird?"

Mike could only shrug, "no."

"So you shouldn't worry, if he wants to talk, he'll talk. How's Jane been?" Eddie asked, losing the
seriousness in his tone. Everyone always did that when talking to him about the youngest Byers
sibling.
"Huh?"

"Ya know, how is she? You two have been hanging out."

"Oh right, yeah she's good. We study together," he said, eyes trailing back towards the poster. He
really needed to tape that up again before it fell.

"You study together, right."

Mike creased his brows together, "what's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing, look I'm just saying you can talk to me about stuff, alright?" Eddie said, place a hand on
top of his head, patting him.

In that split second, Mike remembered curling up in his car and sobbing into the steering wheel,
hoping no one could hear him. That question that's been playing in his head for weeks now popped
up and almost spilled out.

What does it mean to wish a boy was a girl, but also feel sick thinking about this boy not just being
himself? What does it mean to want to fall in love with a boy in the way I was taught to love a girl?
How do I stop feeling like this?

Just thinking it made an invisible hand tighten around his neck, something sickening that made him
push it all away.

Clearing his throat Mike nodded, "yeah I know."

"We're back!"

A relieved breath left him as the two girls wandered into the garage with pizza boxes. That
immediately took Eddie's attention.

"I don't know why it took so long, but when we walked in they weren't even making them yet,"
Max said.

Eddie pulled a slice out, "did they get the order?"

"We placed it twenty minutes before we even left."

Mike took the the plate handed to him and a napkin, pressing it on top of the pizza slice, taking
away some of the grease. He never liked the way it felt in his mouth. Even though Max insisted
that it was impossible to feel every drop of grease, Mike disagreed.

"God I hate when you do that." The redhead grimaced.

He scrunched his nose up and sent her a glare, "leave me alone."

"You're wasting napkins," Max said, her mouth full.

"Would you rather have some greasy napkins or my vomit all over the place? Because I'll do it--"

Robin cut him off, "okay gross, Max stop bothering him, and you stop being so prissy all the
time."

Mike rolled his eyes, going back to what he was doing while making sure to stare Max down in the
process. He moved the napkin even slower now, emphasizing each motion.

"Guess what we're doing this weekend?"

"A gig?" Eddie asked.

Robin shook her head, "nope. We're going camping." They all went silent, staring at the smiling
girl in surprise.
"What?" Mike got out.

"Chrissy said it would be a fun bonding experience. We're all going."

"Who's everyone?"

Robin sighed, "us, obviously, then Steve, Chrissy, Lucas, Dustin, and the Byers twins."

"They're not twins," Max said, "and why do we all have to go? What camp site is going to have
that kind of space?"

"Well, you know how we don't have school Monday?" They nodded, "we're leaving Friday after
school, and driving a few hours, there's a huge campsite that Chrissy and I found, we've already got
a spot and everything. It'll be really fun! Apparently Steve and Will are really into camping and
have all the shit already."

Eddie raised a brow, "what are we--"

"And we already have groups! It's all planned out, so since there's a lot of us we have to split up.
So, Chrissy, Max, Jane, and I are going in Chrissy's car. Lucas, Dustin are going together because
Lucas' car is going to carry a lot of the stuff and there won't be room. Then it's you two with Steve
and Will. Steve is insisting that he's driving because apparently Will's car is some kind of death
trap, I don't know; but we have it all figured out, I promise it'll be so fun." Once Robin stopped
talking, she finally took a breath.

Mike placed his pizza down, "what about tents--"

"Got that too. Okay, so Jane says they have two tents, Lucas has one, I have one and then Steve has
one. I mean, everyone can pick who they pair with though. Max and I can share, then Chrissy and
Jane said they're sharing. Dustin and Lucas are sharing I think. Eddie, you and Mike can--"

"No, absolutely not, not after last time," Eddie rushed out. Mike smiled to himself at the memory.
It was years ago they had done a makeshift camping trip in Mike's backyard and he'd taken up the
whole night trying to scare the elder teen.
Robin huffed, "fine, you can share with Steve then."

Mike felt his stomach sink, finally realizing what that meant. There was only one person left.

Oh.

----------

"Did you agree to this?"

"No I got dragged here, I'll show you the marks--"

Mike rolled his eyes, "shut up. You knew how big Steve's car was."

"What was I supposed to do Mike? Would you have rather taken my car?"

He shivered at the thought, "god no."

"Then stop complaining. Now can you help me?"

Glancing at the younger boy, he grimaced. Will was holding a cooler that was full of drinks and
trying to find room for it in the trunk. Mike scolded himself every time his eyes stayed on Will's
arms for a bit too long.

"You look like you're doing fine."

Will let out a huff, finally shoving it inside, "if you were going to be useless, why'd you follow me
out here?"

"I wanted to hang out," he said with a smile.

The younger boy turned, still slightly out of breath, but Mike felt his heart stutter when Will's lips
turned. It really was so entrancing to watch the teen smile, his eyes always lit up, and most of the
time when Will smiled he bit the very tip of his tongue, as if he was trying to stop it from
widening.

"Still can't believe you didn't tell me Steve had a sports car."

Will's smile dropped, and Mike almost whined. He firmly pressed his lips together, humiliation
rising onto his cheeks. Though, Will didn't seem to notice.

"I wasn't about to let you drive," Will said as they started walking back inside.

"Hey! I'm a good driver--"

"No, you're good at driving a motorcycle, when you get behind a wheel any person around is in
imminent danger."

Mike scoffed, "is this about Wednesday? I said I was sorry."

"You didn't even let me buckle, I'm never letting you drive again."

Everyone was shuffling around Robin's house, itching to get on the road.

"Did you get it in?" Jane asked, walking up to them with a smile.

Mike threw an arm around her shoulder, "yep, we did."

"I don't believe you did anything," Max said, walking by and sending him a cheeky smile.

"He didn't."
"Is everyone ready to go?" Robin called from the kitchen, receiving a wave of mumbled
agreement.

After that they filed out, going to their respective cars. Mike grimaced at the tiny car as Steve and
Eddie hopped into the front seats. Will sat down and he reluctantly followed after, his knees
smacking against the back of Eddie's seat.

"Move your seat up," he said, reaching forward and pushing the teens head.

"No, I need leg room."

"Yeah so do I, now move."

Eddie let out a long sigh and reached down, barely letting the seat move an inch.

"You piece of shit--"

"If we're going to argue the whole time one of you are going to Chrissy's car and I promise that will
be so much worse because she drives a buggy. So shut it," Steve said as he pulled out of the
driveway.

"This is hell," he muttered under his breath, listening as Steve and Eddie started to fight over who's
music to listen to. Once they settled on one, Mike grimaced and opened his mouth.

"No don't play this song," Will said first, head leaned against the window.

"Yes please it's so fucking long."

"No one wants to be screamed at," Will added.

Steve looked in the rear view mirror, "would you both shut it?"
"We'll shut up if you play a different song," he said.

"Yeah."

"Is this what you two do together?" Eddie asked, "be miserable?"

Mike glanced over at Will, seeing that they both did have their noses scrunched up in distaste.
Looking like stuck up mothers at a lunch-in.

"Do you two spend your time listening to shitty music and sucking dicks?" Mike retorted, harshly
knocking his knees against Eddie's seat.

"Yeah."

"What-- Will!" Steve said, looking utterly scandalized.

"I wanted to be included."

Mike almost melted on the spot.

"You guys don't know real music, be grateful I'm blessing your ears with my playlist," Eddie said,
reaching back and pushing Mike's head.

"Eat shit."

"Yeah--"

Steve pointed a finger at Will through the mirror, "don't you dare."
"I have to pee," he said, leaning back and crossing his arms.

"No you don't, shut up," Eddie scolded.

"My legs hurt Eds, I'm cramping. It's going to stunt my growth if I don't stand up."

"Wheeler, just lay your legs on Will," Steve said.

He glanced over to the boy, and Will moved his hands up. An invitation. The idea of being closer
to Will was something he guiltily craved. Unbuckling, he swung his legs onto Wil's awaiting lap, a
smile on his face.

"Can you shut up now?" Steve asked.

"Hey, you're the host, you should be wanting to make your guests comfortable."

Steve sent him a glare, "it's a car, not a five star hotel dipshit."

"This is why I don't do car rides, I'm a mover, you know what I mean? I need to feel energy course
through my veins. It's a gift and a curse," he said, leaning back against the window. The back seat
space was practically non existent, so he and Will were smooshed together.

Will shifted to reach into his pocket, and before Mike could find a reason to gripe about that too,
the younger boy handed him his house keys. He stared at them, only then realizing he had been
messing and yanking on his rings, causing his fingers to feel raw.

"Just play with this." the shorter teen said softly enough that the other two didn't hear. Mike hated
how his heart swelled, and he found himself fearful that Will would be able to read his unhidden
adoration.

He took the keys and flipped them around in his hand, feeling that tightness in his chest slowly
dissipating.
"Mike! You like this song," Eddie said, voice booming with excitement. He tuned into what was
playing, and a smile grew on his face.

Oh, take the time to waste a moment

"Sexy was her boyfriend, with no kin, always runnin' from the law," he sang out loudly, leaning
forward to grip onto Will's hands, "every other weekend, the week ends with his back in her claw."

Will let out a warm laugh, "stop."

Mike shook the younger boy's arms, "He's a live wire, wired, shootin' sparks in the night."

"He's a gun for hire, hire with a bead in his sights," Eddie added, rolling down the window.

"Take the time to waste a moment," Mike sang obnoxiously, reaching up and grabbing Will's
cheeks to rock his head to the music.

The laughter that spilled from the younger boy was enough to make him keep going. The pure joy
on his face made something ache in Mike's chest. A want he didn't know what to do with.

"What's your favorite song Willy?" He asked teasingly.

"If you ever call me that again I will vomit in your mouth."

Mike widened his eyes comically and pressed their foreheads together firmly, "I would love that."

Will groaned and shoved him back, "I'm not telling you."

"Wanna know what mine is?" Steve asked with a smirk.

"Dancing Through Life from the Wicked musical?" he said with a mocking smile, "wow that's
crazy, it fits you so well."

"Are you calling me shallow?" Steve said, his face pressed together with a scowl.

"You've seen Wicked?" Eddie asked.

"Life's more painless, for the brainless. Those who don't try, never look foolish," he sang loudly,
the memory of being yelled at by his theater director popping into his head. What a time.

"I was going to say AC/DC--"

"you're lying," he said, wrapping himself around Will's arm. The keys had gotten old and he needed
something to grab onto. He was in an awkward crunched position, but couldn't find it in himself to
care.

"What-- no I'm not, I love them," Will let out a snort, head turned to the window, "shut up, Byers."

"I didn't say anything."

Mike smiled brightly, "what's his favorite song?"

The younger boy only shrugged, "I don't know."

"Yes you do, tell me."

Will chuckled, "it's--"

"Don't you dare!"

"What is it Harrington?" Eddie added in, wiggling his brows, "you like to listen to some Britney?"
"No that's not-- it's Michael Jackson--"

"It's Girlfriend by Avril Lavigne."

"Will!" Steve screeched.

Before Will could even retort, the song started blaring through the speakers. Eddie had always been
quick.

I think about you all the time, you're so addictive

"Don't pretend, I think you know I'm damn precious," Mike watched as Will mouthed the lyrics.

He gripped the boy's cheeks with one hand, squeezing them, "and hell yeah I'm the motherfucking
princess."

"Make it stop!" Steve said dramatically, but Mike could see the smile on his face.

"Hey, hey, you, you I don't like your girlfriend!" Eddie screamed out the window, "wow
Harrington, who inspired this song?"

Steve rolled his eyes, "Will's lying."

"No I'm not."

"Come on Stevie, just admit you have a guilty pleasure," Mike said, resting his head on Will's
shoulder. He felt his heart pounding, but at this point everyone and their mother knew he was a
touchy person. So even if Mike was finding any possible excuse to be close to Will, no matter how
guilty that made him feel, he would take it.

Besides, Will had strong arms, it wasn't his fault they made the perfect pillow.
"Yes fine, but if any of you tell Robin I swear to god."

Mike smirked, "my lips are sealed. What's Will's favorite song?"

"I literally have no idea, he doesn't tell people shit."

He looked at the younger boy, "tell me."

"Nope."

"I hate you."

Will smiled, "okay."

"I'll figure it out."

"Good luck."

Mike narrowed his eyes, realizing how he'd be spending his time the whole weekend.
 Chapter 17
Chapter Notes

Hearing (Sleeping At Last)

He should have known things were going too well. They'd gotten two hours into the drive, and
besides the fact that Mike was spending his time kicking the back of Eddie's chair, Will was
relieved by the lack of trouble. That was until Steve let out a guilty hissing sound.

"What is it?" he asked.

"Uh...well, you know how I told you my mom borrowed my car last week?" Steve said, but Will's
eyes focused on the wheel and how the blond haired teen was pulling off the road.

"Oh my god, is this the car your mom and I took on our date? That's so crazy I didn't even notice,"
Mike grumbled, head pressed against the window.

Steve sent the jumpy teen a glare, but didn't comment, "she said something about one of the tires
being low on air, but I just thought it was fine because she's always worrying about stupid shit--"

"Please tell me you're joking," he said, now feeling the unevenness as the car rolled to a stop.

"You're an idiot Harrington," Eddie groaned out. Will couldn't help but agree.

"It's not my fault--"

"How is this not your fault? You really couldn't have just filled the tire? Now we're stuck in the
middle of nowhere and I've had to pee for the last forty-five minutes." Mike was bouncing his legs,
and Will could hear the panic under his snappy tone.

"Oh calm down we're not going to die asshole, it's a flat tire--"
"This is why we shouldn't have taken this fucking car--"

Will cut in, "okay just calm down, Steve do you have a spare?"

"I think so, but I don't...well I never got taught how to change a tire so it's not really--"

He unbuckled, "it's fine, I can do it. I'm assuming it's under the cooler?"

"Yeah."

He nodded, "alright. it should only take a few minutes. Mike, get out of the car and find a bush to
pee in."

"Eddie you have to block me," Mike said as they all shuffled out of the car.

"Block you from what? the raccoons?"

"If a raccoon tries to bite off my dick you have to fight it. It's the bro code..."

Will felt a smile tug on his lips as the pair's voices drifted off into the open woods. He pulled open
the trunk and handed Steve the cooler.

"Okay, you haven't had a flat tire in this car right?"

"Nope, been running like an angel," Steve said, patting the roof.

Will rolled his eyes, "it would be nice if you carried an air bump around."

"Like the one's for balloons?"

"No idiot, ones for cars," he grunted, finding two rocks and pushing them against the flat tire
before pulling out the new one.

"Arms are looking nice Byers."

He huffed, "are you going to help me or not?"

Steve rolled his eyes and walked over. Will crouched down and snapped his fingers, indicating for
the elder boy to hand him the jack.

"You could use your words--"

"Shut up." It took Will a moment to get the piece firmly placed and perpendicular. "Okay, give me
the wrenches."

"What, you aren't done yet?" Eddie's voice drew closer, him and Mike seeming to be finished with
their 'endeavors'.

"You've been gone for, like, five minutes."

"No way, it was longer than that, Mike's pisses forever--"

"Hush, he's focusing," Mike said, his voice whispered.

"Oh that is rich coming from you."

Will glanced up from where he was loosening the bolts and sent Mike a tiny smile. The taller boy
still seemed antsy. Steve and Eddie started to converse softly.

"No I'm not fucking kidding."

Steve scoffed, "you're a liar Munson--"

"I'll show you, come on." Eddie yanked on Steve's arm, dragging him back the way he and Mike
had just come from.

Will leaned back on his heels.

"Come here," he said kindly.

"Huh?"

"I need your help, come here."

A giddy smile flipped onto Mike's face as he walked forward, crouching down next to him. Their
shoulders were pressed together, and he couldn't help but melt against the contact.

"You know what that is?" He asked, pointing towards the center of the wheel.

"The metal part."

Will snorted, "I mean, yeah, but no, it's the hubcap."

"What's that do?"

"Well, under it are the lug nuts. We have to get those off for the tire to detach."

Mike looked at the long wrench, "are you gonna let me do it?"

"You can try."

The elder teen's nose scrunched in distaste, "what's that supposed to mean?"

He smirked, "just try, you'll see. Go counterclockwise."

Will helped Mike place the wrench over the first nut, and did his best not to laugh as the boy
dramatically groaned and pulled, trying to get the wrench to move.

"Oh my god, what did you do? I'm breaking a sweat."

A laugh slipped past his lips and he gently took the wrench back, "did you think it would be loose?
It keeps the tire on Mike."

"Okay that's not even movable, can I jump on it?"

"Well you could, but it might strip the bolts." Will tightened his arm and yanked down in one
quick motion, loosening the nut just enough. "you can hold them, here."

Mike didn't move, his eyes slightly widened, cheeks red. Will felt concern rise in his chest at the
frozen look. It was rare for Mike to not be making some kind of movement.

"Hey, you okay?" He asked, placing the wrench down, "Mike?"

"What?" The teen breathed out.

Pinching his brows, Will reached a hand to Mike's cheek, "you're really red, did you hurt yourself?"

"No I--"

"Do you feel sick?" He asked carefully, moving his hand until he was resting on the boy's
forehead.
"I don't feel sick, I'm okay." Mike got out, his usually booming voice was so gentle, and Will felt
some part of his heart start to melt, his body almost following after it. He couldn't stop the tilt his
head made, giving him a better look at the boy's face.

"did you have a day terror?"

"A what?" Mike asked, confusion overtaking his features.

"It's like a nightmare, but when you're awake. Makes you freeze, can't move," he explained, as if it
was obvious.

It was now Mike's turn to look worried, "that's never happened to me. Does that happen to you?"

"Yeah, it's normal," he said, feeling something begin to squeeze in his stomach at the idea that
something was wrong with him.

"Do you mean flashbacks or something?" Mike had his head bent in a way that made it possible for
him to look up into Will's eyes. It was comforting, an open stance.

"I..." he trailed off.

"Having stuff like that can be a symptom of PTSD, nightmares when you're awake, you hear about
it a lot in military veterans," Mike said, eyeing him nervously while also keeping his tone bland in
a way that gave off the impression he was doing some kind of presentation instead of accusing Will
of something.

He cleared his throat and looked back to the tire, "weird that's not-- I mean, I don't have anything
like that so I don't know. It's nothing, I'm probably just making it up."

"Will--"

"Okay, can you hold these?" he rushed out, picking up the wrench and yanking off the rest of the
nuts, gripping the handle tightly so that Mike didn't notice his shaky hands.

"Look, I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable--"

"Why would you make me uncomfortable? Nothing happened, it's fine," he said, lifting the tire up
off the ground.

"You can talk to me."

He pressed his lips together, putting on the new tire, "there's nothing to talk about."

"I know, but if there ever is, you can tell me I...care about you, alright?"

Will stopped moving and looked to Mike, their eyes locking together. He inhaled sharply,
searching Mike's gaze for some kind of answer to his bubbling questions. Whatever he found was
impossible to read.

"Me too," he got out, trying to keep his voice level.

Mike nudged their arms together, "so, are you going to let me tighten them?"

"Do you want the wheel to fall off?"

The curly-headed teen gasped, "did you just call me weak?"

"I didn't have to, you gave me evidence on your own." Will finished the last one, "but you can put
the cap back on."

Mike scoffed, "thank god you let me do the most important job, you would have destroyed it."

He stood to his feet, watching as the still crouched boy focused on his one and only task. It was
endearing.

"--and holy shit that was definitely a flying squirrel, have you heard about the white ones?" Steve's
voice filtered over.

"Those are a myth--"

"They aren't a myth I learned about them in school dipshit."

"Oh right, so then it's full proof right?" Eddie asked.

"It literally is, yes."

Mike hopped to his feet, pressing both wrenches into Will's hands, "I had a flying squirrel as a pet."

"That is such bullshit," Eddie said.

"I literally did," Mike scoffed, crossing his arms, "I even told Will about it in confidence."

Will placed a hand on his hip after putting the old tire away, "he did, it's because we had the same
name."

"Yeah."

"Yeah," Will agreed.

Steve rolled his eyes, "you're both such brats, you know that?"

"It's not our fault you're dense," Will said, putting the cooler away for the second time and
slamming the trunk.
"Hey! Be careful with her."

"I had to slam it to make sure the tire stays on when it's under force."

Mike nodded, "he does, know your car facts Steve."

"Yeah, it's embarrassing."

"I thought you said Will was the nice one?" Eddie asked, looking at Steve as they all got back into
their respective spots inside.

"I'm right here."

Steve ignored him, "no, Lucas is the nice one, Will is just...well he's nice in practice."

Will scoffed and looked out the window, "at least I'm not the ugly one, you've got that locked
down."

"Hey!"

Mike let out a wheezing laugh, throwing his legs back onto Will's lap as the car started. Eddie was
stifling a laugh, dodging the smack Steve was trying to send him.

"Apologize for that-- and stop rolling your eyes, your mom would be so disappointed."

"No she wouldn't, Joyce loves when he rolls his eyes, she told me," Mike said, sending the blond a
cheeky grin.

"Oh shut it Wheeler."

"Don't tell him to shut up."

"Yeah."

"Yeah." Will held out his hand, letting out an amused snort when Mike enthusiastically hi-fived
him.

"All of you suck," Steve muttered, still pushing Eddie every time the drummer let out a new wave
of laughter.

----------

When they eventually made it to the camp site, Will's butt was completely numb. After being
teased mercilessly, Steve got his revenge by not letting them stop again for the next three hours.

Mike was practically inconsolable. He would go from taking up every ounce of personal space
Will had to scooting so far away he was sure the elder boy would fall out of the car.

"Oh my god, grass," Mike said, crouching down to the ground and running his fingers through the
green threads.

"You guys made it!"

Will spun around, a smile on his face as Chrissy ran forward. She threw herself into his arms,
pressing a kiss to Will's cheek.

"Was the drive okay?" He asked, brushing some of her hair away.

"Yep, Max drove for half the time."

"Must have been nice," Steve muttered.

Eddie dropped his mouth open, "you said you wouldn't let me drive!"

"Where are the others?"

"Oh they're setting stuff up, told me to come keep a look out for you guys," Chrissy said, wrapping
her arms around his waist.

Will used to hate being touched by people, and sometimes it was still something he struggled with.
Trust helped a lot. He didn't like to be surprised by it, snuck up on, but when the person was
obvious with their intention it was welcomed.

"By yourself? That's not safe." Will threw an arm over her shoulder, looking around at the
surrounding cars.

"Well luckily you're here now, what a hero, so can we go?"

Will shot his brows up and turned to his side where Mike's voice came from. There was a snap in
it, one buttered in irritation. Before anyone could get a word in, Mike walked off, backpack thrown
over his shoulder.

"What's his problem?" Steve asked.

Eddie let out a sigh, "he doesn't do well with being in confined spaces for a long time, get's
agitated. It's probably nothing, don't worry about it."

"Did I do something?" Chrissy asked, looking up at him nervously.

"Of course not, he's just being an ass, Eddie's right."

With that, Eddie walked off to follow after Mike, leaving the rest of them to find their way to
campsite.

"Wait, you got a flat tire? Is that what took so long?" Chrissy asked as Steve began doing the
retelling of their journey.

"Yeah, but us leaving after everyone didn't help," Will said, trying to be involved in the
conversation. It was a useless attempt since his mind was stuck on Mike. That wasn't anything
new, but now it wasn't in a positive light.

Chrissy was like a sister to him, always had been, and seeing the joy taken from her face when
Mike spoke had irked him. The both of them hadn't spoken much, and Chrissy had spent an absurd
amount of time helping Jane out with her crush and reassuring her about it only to have Mike snap
at her.

Well, not at her, but it definitely felt directed.

When they got to the site, Mike seemed back to his normal self, laughing and smiling along with
conversation.

Will felt his blood heating up, dangerously close to a boil.

Everyone was scattered around trying to put up tents and laying out food, he could vaguely see
Max and Robin walking towards the lake. Will zeroed his attention in on his sister, and the lump of
curly hair that was attached to her hip.

"No, stop it!" Jane laughed as Mike reached over and destroyed her attempt at hanging a hammock
up.

"Well he seems to be feeling better," Chrissy cut in, a wide smile on her face. Seeming to have
forgotten the whole incident.

An immediate wave of guilt hit Will, he was supposed to be happy for his sister. It was his job to
support her, and having her crush obviously reciprocate her feelings was a good thing. He knew
that.

"Yeah," he said shortly, voice a whisper.

"Okay, I'm gonna go help Lucas and Dustin." Chrissy pressed a kiss to both his and Steve's cheeks
before walking off.

Will crossed his arms and looked to the ground, trying to get the prickling anger and jealously to
leave him.

"You alright?" Steve asked, hitting their shoulders together.

"Yep, fine."

Will raised his eyes and glanced at the other teen, stomach swooping when he saw the look in
Steve's gaze. Suspicion.

"Mike's an ass sometimes, just got in my head I guess," he said, feeling pure terror beating in his
chest. The lie slipped out too easily, and Steve nodded, understanding written on his face.

The blond gripped his shoulder, "well, to get your mind off of it lets set up some tents."

Will sent him a small smile, "yeah, thanks."

----------

Since there were so many of them, it took awhile for all of the tents to be put together. They were
now sitting around the fire Lucas had started, the night air hitting thickly. Will had wrapped
himself up in a sweatshirt, listening as loud conversation carried around them. Will was angry and
bitter, something he despised himself for feeling.

Though, he couldn't help it, because every time he looked up he saw Jane curled up against Mike's
side. At this point, he wanted to cry. Hating himself for being angry in the first place and hating
that he couldn't do anything about it, but then he hated himself for wanting to be the one under
Mike's arm. Will knew the curly-headed singer was a touchy person, but now Will hated himself
for wanting to burst into flames when Mike touched anyone.

He wanted Mike to hold him.

"Okay, we've got to play a game or something I'm dying of boredom," Robin groaned, cutting off
everyone's separate conversations.

"Like what?" Lucas asked.

Will lifted his head, looking towards his friend. Max was sitting next to them, huddled in a
sweatshirt Will found vaguely familiar.

"Truth or dare?" Robin sang out, a wave of groans following that, "come on! It'll be fun."

After a wave of murmured agreement, things started up quickly. It was nerve-wracking and Will
just hoped they all forgot he was sitting there.

"Steve, truth or dare?" Max asked.

"Dare."

Lucas leaned in and whispered something in the redhead's ear, making her snort, "okay, I dare you
to shove a pinecone in your underwear and leave it there for the rest of the game."

Steve whined, his face pulled into a grimace. They watched as he reluctantly did as he was told,
sitting down next to Robin with a scowl.

"This is horrible."

Max rolled her eyes, "oh stop, that's an easy one."

"Okay Chrissy, truth or dare?" Steve asked.

"Truth."
Steve sat quietly for a moment, "alright, who was 'mystery guy' from last year?"

"No! I told you that was confidential."

"Wait, what do you mean mystery guy?" Will asked.

She huffed, "okay fine, It was Jason--"

"What?" Everyone yelled out in shock.

Chrissy's face was beet red, "I was drunk! It was one kiss and it was so horrible I was too
embarrassed to tell anyone."

Robin was practically laying on the floor laughing. That's how the game went on for awhile,
everyone falling over one another as things grew out of hand. So far Will had avoided the fire, but
knew that wouldn't last for long when Robin turned to look at him.

"Will, truth or dare?"

Everyone got quiet.

"Truth."

She bit at her lip, "okay, since it's your first one I'll be nice. What was...the first present you
remember getting?"

It should have been easy. For anyone else it would have been a light-hearted and simple question;
but Will felt like someone had just ripped at his chest, yanking out memories he wanted to keep
hidden. He stared for a moment, feeling stuck. From the corner of his eyes he saw Jane bringing a
hand to her face.
Speak up! You useless boy.

Will tried to get his mouth to work as the silence around them became suffocating. It was only a
few seconds, but felt like hours in his head.

"It was a um..."

If you can't respect my house, you don't get nice things.

"It was a box of crayons," Will clenched his jaw tightly, voice drifting off with the cool wind.

"Oh my god! That's literally the first thing my dad got me, do you still have it? I never use mine
anymore cause they're so fragile," Robin asked with excitement, a smile on her face.

Will gripped the hem of his sweatshirt, "n-no I-- I broke them, didn't last very long."

"I'll go," Jane spoke out, cutting through the panic rising in him.

No one else seemed to notice her attempt to shift the conversation, and Will was grateful to go
along with it.

"I've got one!" Chrissy said, leaning forward on the log next to him, "I dare you to...kiss Mike."

Will's world stopped.

Whooping and cheering moved around their small circle. Everyone completely oblivious to Will
breaking on the inside. Jane's face went red, and Will couldn't even dare to let himself look at
Mike.

"Is that okay with you?" Jane asked softly.

"Uh, yeah sure."

Will bit down harshly at his cheek, arms crossed. It was a quick peck, their lips barely grazing
together.

"Oh come on man that was nothing, kiss her!" Dustin said, clapping his hands.

He shouldn't care, it was stupid for him to care so much. Will knew that tears were knocking at the
door behind his eyes, they were threatening him with embarrassment. Here he was feeling sorry for
himself while his sister was getting her first kiss with the guy she's liked for years.

Will was a monster.

"God fine," Mike said, cupping the side of Jane's face and pressing their lips together firmly.

It wasn't long, but Will was watching it all happen in slow motion. If someone asked him to recall
the memory, he'd be able tell them about how Mike's right pointer finger with the flower ring
twitched off of Jane's cheek when they kissed. He'd tell them how Jane smiled as their lips pressed
together, how Mike dropped his hand almost as quick as he brought it up. He would be able to tell
them how he felt his heart crack right down the middle.

"There ya go!" Eddie said, standing up to clap his hands.

"I have to pee, I'll be right back," he whispered to Chrissy who seemed much too distracted to
care.

"Okay, don't be too long," she said, sending him a grin.

Will could only nod, not trusting his voice if he dared to utter a word. The clapping died down as
he walked into the woods. The sun was almost fully set, but there was enough light for him to see
where he was going. It was all too much, noise was punching in his head, voices laughing at him.

He should be guilty, it was wrong for him to be upset, Jane was happy.
His legs gave out as he slid down a tree, a choked sob ringing out into the empty woods. Will
covered his mouth with a clammy hand, chest burning as he tried to keep quiet. It felt like
something was attempting to jump out of his throat, the sobs growing to a level where it was hard
to breathe. Silent, but painful. Will shook against the tree, holding himself close.

Jane got her first kiss. Will got to be reminded that he would never be quite good enough to have
what he wanted.

He would only ever be a useless shield that got his heart shattered over and over again. It was
taunting. Will pressed his mouth against his clothed knee, staring down at the ground, a tear rolled
onto a perfectly green leaf. It looked like someone plucked it out of a children's book. The stem
was long, almost too long to be natural.

With a trembling hand Will picked it up and crumbled it in his hand, watching as the perfectly
green pieces snapped under his force and fell back to the forest ground as nothing. Now everyone
would walk by and not notice as they stepped on it, breaking it further.

People only wanted something when it was whole and beautiful, not some mistake that someone
else already ripped apart. There was nothing endearing about an ugly, ripped up leaf.

Will wouldn't want it either if he was them.

 Chapter 18

No one came looking for him that night. Will was grateful for that. Eventually the tears had dried,
leaving ugly stains ripping at his face. No amount of scrubbing his cheeks would help. As he stared
down at the ground, he wondered if the marks would leave scars. On the logistical side, that didn't
make any sense, but Will knew that even if no one else ever noticed, when he looked in the mirror
he would see long marks running down his cheeks.

He'd never been blessed with the gift of being forgetful.

When the sun had started to become invisible, Will pulled himself off the ground. Absent-
mindedly, he brushed off the dead leaves from his pants and walked back to the campsite. The loud
laughing and yells had disappeared, leaving a barely crackling fire in their wake.

"Hey, I was about to go looking for you," Lucas said, standing up from the log. Will glanced
around, realizing they were the only ones outside.

"Sorry, got lost. Everyone head to bed?" He asked.

Lucas nodded, walking over to him, "yeah, Chrissy was insistent on going to search for you, but I
figured you need some air."

Crossing his arms, Will looked to the floor. He knew what Lucas was referring to, "yeah, guess it
was getting to be a bit too much."

"Robin doesn't know--"

"I know, it's fine."

"Will." Lucas placed a hand on his shoulder, "you can talk to me, okay? I know your dad is a
touchy subject, but I'm here for you."

"It was a long time ago--"

"You know that it wasn't," Lucas said softly, dropping his hand, "we both know that it wasn't. You
don't have to talk to me about it, and I won't say anything to anyone, you know I won't. I'm here for
you, man."

Will looked up, sending Lucas his best smile, "I know, I'm here for you too."

"Good."

"So...Max--"

Lucas flushed, "no, absolutely not."

"What? Come on something's going on." Will felt the tightness around his heart leaving, being
around Lucas always helped with that. The other teen had never been one to shy away from his
emotions, simply coming out and telling the people he loved that he cared for them. It was
refreshing.

"I don't know, I mean, she's kind of intense so it's not easy to read her, but I really like spending
time with her. Last week after working on homecoming stuff we went to a movie," Lucas was
visibly trying to suppress a smile, "she's just...she's great."

"Nice going, man," Will said, patting his arm affirmingly, "I'm assuming it was your sweatshirt she
was wearing?"

Lucas let out a chuckle, "was it obvious?"

He shrugged, "definitely didn't look like her style, unless she picked up football merchandise in her
free time."

Lucas let out a snort, "alright shut it. I'm heading to sleep, you should too, you look tired."

"Thanks, really needed that," he muttered, letting Lucas pat his back before walking off to his tent.
Will stood there for a moment, staring down at the dying fire. The last thing he wanted to do was
crawl into any confined space with Michael Wheeler, that sounded like some personally crafted
hell. He stared at the tent that he'd set up, it was the farthest from the others since they'd run out of
room.

For a second, he considered just sleeping outside or walking back to the car, but knew how that
would look. The last thing he wanted to do was ruin everyone's weekend because he couldn't
handle his emotions.

His emotions and Mike.

With a huff of breath, Will took the first step, knowing he couldn't avoid it forever. Besides, it
wasn't like Mike was going to be weird, they hadn't actually gotten into any kind of fight. It was
fine, all he had to do was act normal. Before he could lose the confidence, Will grabbed the zipper
and opened up the tent, being greeted by a warm light coming from the portable lamp.

It wasn't too small of a space, they could still stand, even if they had to crouch. Well, he could
stand, Mike was a completely different story.

He'd been hoping for some luck. That was laughable. Mike wasn't asleep or even acting like he was
leaning towards that idea, the sharply cut boy was sitting up, flannel wrapped tightly around
himself; and he was staring. Right at Will.

"Where were you?" Mike asked before he had a chance to take a breath.

Will locked his jaw and zipped the tent behind himself. They had a bunch of blankets, pillows, and
sleeping bags scattered around since it was too much work to bring air mattresses. Will regretted
that now, realizing he didn't have a barrier to hide behind.

"Are you going to answer me?"

With a sigh, Will plopped down, "I went pee."

"For an hour?"
"Yep," he said, pulling his knees close. Will was looking just past Mike's head, studying the bland
patterns on the tent.

"So that's bullshit, what actually happened?" Mike pressed.

"Nothing 'actually happened' I just needed some air--"

"Then why didn't you just say that--"

"Because I don't have to tell you everything Mike," he snapped, meeting the elder boy's gaze. That
was a mistake. Will felt his stomach take a little dive. Mike had all-consuming eyes, that was a
known characteristic at this point. They were dark and narrowed, finding their focus like a cheetah
hunting its prey.

"Fine, sorry for caring--"

"Oh don't do that, you don't get to make me feel bad, you obviously didn't care then because you
were too busy making out with my sister--"

"It was a dare! Oh my god, is that what you're so worried about?"

Will tightened his arms around himself, "I don't care, alright? I don't care about any of this, all I did
was walk off to be alone, you're the one being an ass about it."

They held eye contact for a moment, and Will tried to take smaller breaths, not wanting Mike to
notice how difficult it was to keep himself under control. The tent was too small and Will had no
where to run, which felt like a death sentence.

It all snapped when Mike moved his eyes away

"Whatever fine." Mike sharply laid himself down, "goodnight."

Will stared at the elder boy's turned back for a drawn out beat. Then flicking off the lamp and
laying down, he kept his eyes trained up. Will laid stiffly, wanting to scream when all he could
focus on was every little shift Mike made, it was addictive. Clenching his eyes shut, he hugged his
arms close, trying to use them as some kind of shield. It wasn't helping as much as it used to.

For a split second, Will opened his mouth, the need to say something and break the choking
tension was burning; but losing confidence, he pinched it shut. There was nothing to even say, and
having to have another conversation with Mike might just snap him. So, with that, Will closed his
eyes and prayed sleep would take him.

--------

Will was riddled with exhaustion. He'd barely been able to keep his eyes shut the entire night, his
head pounding with unwanted thoughts. When the sun came up, he was practically running out of
the tent, only sparing a glance at Mike's sleeping face.

"You're up early."

He jumped, "shit."

Turning around, he saw Max walking up to him, a blanket hugged around her shoulders. Will was
standing by the water, trying to clear his head. It seemed that the redhead had the same idea.

"Your sister snores by the way."

"I thought you were with Robin."

She shrugged, "we switched, Jane and I wanted to keep talking and they wanted to sleep. She was
excitable after last night."

Will's heart sunk once again, "oh right, forgot about that."

Max raised a brow. Suspicion.

His heart sped up, palms beginning to sweat, "I had to pee so bad I wasn't even paying attention.
Unfortunate since I bet our mom wanted a picture or something."

Will had never been good at lying, but everyday he was getting better. Max let out a laugh and
looked out to the water. He released a silent breath of relief.

"Mike's a good guy, he won't treat her like shit or anything."

He nodded, "yeah I know, even if I didn't like him it's not my choice, she can date whoever she
wants."

"How chivalrous of you," Max said.

Will shoved a hand into the pocket of his jeans, "I try."

"Chrissy wants to go hiking today, but the guys and Robin are being shits about it," she stated
bluntly.

"Well we could all--"

"So they're doing their shit and you're coming with us."

He blinked in confusion, "what?"

"We can't go walking around in the woods on our own. So, we're taking you with us and they can
do whatever."

"Max!" Jane's voice skidded down the hill. Will held his arms open as the younger girl barreled
into them, "guess what?"

Will wrapped Jane in the hug, holding her close. Out of everyone last night, she was the one person
he wanted to squeeze by his side.

"What?" Max asked.

"Wait, you're coming with us right?" Jane looked up at him, he nodded, "good, okay, Mike said
he'd come to."

Will was seconds away from drowning himself in the lake.

"How'd you get him to do that?"

"He only really had two options, it was either hike with us, or go fishing."

Max grimaced, "oh yeah, he won't go near that hellscape."

Their conversation drifted around him, Jane still holding onto him. Will should wait next time
before agreeing to things, now he was going to be punished for it all day.

"I'm gonna go get dressed...we're not going on a, like, intense hike right?"

Jane snorted, "no, it's pretty much just a walk."

"Okay good." Max wandered back up to the campsite, leaving him and Jane alone.

Jane pulled back, "we should talk."

"Everything okay?"

She guided him onto the ground, "I'm not talking about me, I'm talking about you."
"What did I do?"

"No-- Will, you didn't do anything, I'm talking about the truth or dare thing..." She pressed, holding
her knees close and looking up at him with big eyes.

"Jane, I'm fine, it wasn't that big of a deal."

"You know what I would do if I saw dad again?" She asked, comically balling her hands into fists,
making a smile peek on his face.

"What?"

"I'd sock him right in the nose."

"I don't think you have the arm strength for that."

She leaned her head on his shoulder, "maybe not, but I've got the enthusiasm. He wouldn't see it
coming either, ya know? He'd being doing the bullshit he always did and I'd walk on
up...and...boom! It'll be over, you'll see."

"Hopefully you won't ever have to do that little miss hero."

Jane sighed, "unless he comes back from his 'business trip' or something."

"Yeah, unless that," he whispered, eyes trained on the calm water, it was barely moving, only
rippling when a wind ran by.

"He shouldn't have done that to you."

"Hm?" He hummed out, barely hearing her.

"Dad, he was really mean to you and stuff, it's just so dumb. Like I don't get it, they were just
fucking crayons, why--"

"Hey, it's okay," he said, pulling her closer to his side. Will kept his eyes forward, knowing he
couldn't look at her. What Jane and their mom thought they knew was barely the tip of the iceberg.
He planned to keep it that way.

"It's not okay."

"Fine, it's not okay, but don't work yourself up about it," he said.

Jane slumped against him, letting the conversation drift off. He felt guilty for brushing off her
concern, he knew how much Jane needed to talk about it, but he wasn't strong enough to sit there
and listen. Their dad had always been bad with the both of them; but he only turned into the
monster when Will was the only one there to taunt. The idea of Jane ever knowing about that was
sickening.

"Alright, we should probably get up," he grunted out, standing to his feet and pulling Jane along.

"Did you see the flower patches on the drive over?" She asked as the trekked up the hill.

"Like a field of flowers?"

"Yep, they're not too far back, that's where Chrissy wants to go."

Will nodded slowly, "how long do you think that walk is?"

"I don't think longer than forty-five minutes. Or it better not be, because I'm not doing that."

He rolled his eyes, "you're lazy."

"I'm not interested in being sore, you're gonna have to carry me back."
Will swallowed tightly, "don't want Mike to carry you?"

She let out a sharp laugh, "his arms would snap in half if he even tried."

"Oh come on, he'd be fine."

"He's only strong when working on fear or adrenaline, so if I want him to carry me I either need to
give him an IV of caffeine or scare the shit out of him."

Will couldn't help the tiny smile that fell on his face, "yeah, guess so."

Footsteps came towards them.

"Hey! are you ready...is he coming?"

Actually seeing Mike made the smile drop in seconds. The elder boy had jogged up, only seeming
to notice Will's presence when he was in front of them.

"Yeah," Jane said, the dreamy blush springing onto her cheeks.

"Oh," Mike whispered. She looked between them, and Will cleared his throat, feeling extremely
awkward and out of place.

"Are you two okay? Did you get into a fight last night or something?"

"Nope, everything's fine," Will said, taking a miniscule step back when he felt Mike shift.

"Uh, you sure?"

"He's just being--"

"I'm gonna go change," Will cut in sharply before Mike could finish his sentence, walking forward
and still not sparing the curly-headed teen a glance.

He didn't know if he wanted to grab Mike's shoulders and shake him, or to go find a nice corner to
sob in. Both seemed like equally perfect and unattainable options.

Before he knew it, they were walking down a wide, dirt path. It was beautiful, the leaves turning
from green to all sorts of autumn colors. Though, no matter how pretty the scenery may be, he
regretted agreeing to come.

"So, how far is this walk?" Mike asked.

"It says only a little over an hour--"

"An hour?" Jane said with a gasp, her mouth dropped open.

"It's not that bad, you'll be fine."

Mike scoffed, causing silence to follow around them.

"Is there something you'd like to say?" Will pressed after noticing that the other boy didn't seem
like he was going to continue.

"Will, not everyone's an athlete here, you could be more sympathetic."

Will shot his brows up, "you can walk back if you want."

"That's not what I said--"

"Then what are you saying?" He snapped back, eyeing Mike as the elder teen shot him stares
through the corner of his eye.

"Um...are you guys okay?" Max asked, almost mimicking Jane's question from not much earlier.

Will looked down, "fine, sorry."

It didn't seem like Mike had any comment on it, his already cutting jaw was clenched in a way that
looked painful. Will wanted to yell at something, no matter how far away he tried to walk from
Mike, the scissors in his hand were too dull to cut through the string tying them together. Will
desperately needed to find something sharper to do the job.

"Really? Cause it looks like you're about to rip each others faces off," Max said with a huff, her
voice amused. Apparently the idea of them getting into some kind of fight was a source of
entertainment.

Will felt Mike's eyes on him, even if it was a subtle stare. He balled his hands into fists, trying to
fight the urge to look back. With every step he heard his heart take a loud beat, threatening him to
walk in Mike's direction. To make some kind of action.

"You guys just gonna ignore me now?" The redhead kept on, not seeming to care that it was
uncomfortable.

"Max, stop," Chrissy whispered.

"Fine, fine."

Jane cut in with an excited gasp, "oh my god! Do you see that?"

He could vaguely hear rushing water, and followed Jane's pointed finger. It was a small waterfall
just behind a line of trees. Jane practically ran forward, Chrissy and Max not far behind her. Will
tapped his teeth together, finally allowing himself to meet the stare Mike didn't take off of him. A
breath caught in his throat at the intensity of it. The other three voices faded off as they splashed
around in the water, but Will couldn't get his feet to move.
Will trailed his eyes up Mike's body, taking in each detail with a zooming focus. As usual, the
elder teen had his fingers littered in rings, bracelets not far behind. He was wearing a some old
graphic T-shirt, the sleeves rolled up. Will swallowed, trying to get his mouth to dry out. When he
met Mike's dazed stare, no words could get past his throat.

Tapping his thumb and pointer finger together quickly, he tried to count each one in his head. It
was something different to focus on, because if he didn't shift his focus, Will couldn't trust himself
anymore.

"Are you going to say something?" He breathed out, feeling like he had just asked that question.

Mike's wet lips parted, "I..."

"Will, Mike, come on!"

He snapped his eyes away, face hot and skin laced with what felt like pop rocks. biting the tip of
his tongue, Will walked off, making sure to bump his shoulder against Mike's as he went. When
the elder teen sucked in a tiny gasp, Will almost froze.

Luckily, he didn't, and soon he was forced to smile along with the three girls, trying to stay as far
away from Mike in the process.

----------

Nothing got better, not that Will was optimistic that things would, but it was torture. Every time
Mike opened his mouth he wanted to walk over and slap the boy, his chest burning with
frustration. Based on the glares he was getting, he figured the other teen felt the same.

When they finally got to the field of flowers, it was pretty underwhelming.

"Sucks that it's close to the road," Chrissy said.

"Yeah makes it good to look at when you're driving, but besides that..." Jane trailed off, leaning
down to pluck a flower out of the ground.
"I think it's kind of pretty," Will budded in.

"A fan of flowers, Byers?" Mike muttered out under his breath, bent down next to Jane as she
continued to examine the bright plants.

Will crossed his arms, "sure Mike."

"Aren't you two fun," Max said, throwing an arm over Will's shoulder, "why don't you kiss and
make up so we can stop listening to your bitching?"

The other two girls let out carefree laughs, but Will saw Mike's shoulders tense as he stood up,
brushing his pants off.

"Fuck off Max," Mike said, voice sharp, but still not anywhere near his normal speaking volume.

"Oh come on, Wheeler, this whole thing has 'your fault' written all over it," Max rolled her eyes, not
seeming deterred by Mike's quickly deteriorating mood.

"Why don't we go back? Lucas said he and they're getting pizzas," Chrissy said, looking down at
her phone.

"They didn't catch any fish to fry?" Mike asked, obviously trying to calm himself down. The fact
that he spoke to Chrissy directly in an unhostile voice made the blonde girl smile brightly.

"I don't think they're that good," she said with a laugh. Will couldn't blame her, of course she
wanted to be friends with her best friends boyfriend.

He stared at the ground, that word making him want to throw up. He should be happy, it was a
good thing, it was all a wonderfully fantastic thing.

On the whole walk back, Mike had an arm thrown over Jane's shoulder. Will tried to keep his eyes
away, to focus on anything other than the empty pit growing in his heart. Jane was smiling brightly
and laughing at almost every word Mike said.

When the campsite came into sight, Will was relieved to have an excuse to go hide away.

"What did you and Mike fight about?" Max asked in a whispered tone.

Will bit at his cheek, "uh, you know how I said him being with Jane was cool?"

"Yeah..."

"I just um, well I just wanted to make sure he'd treat her right, he got offended that I even
mentioned him not doing that, got all touchy. It's nothing," he was definitely going to throw up
now, the lies were spewing out much too easily, "just don't talk to him about it okay? He'd be even
more pissed if I told you."

"Yep, no problem," Max said, patting his arm, "Mike can be really thick sometimes, he'll apologize
or something soon. Maybe. He doesn't actually do great with that."

"Yeah, that's pretty obvious." He looked over to where Chrissy, Mike, and Jane were sitting, now
immersed in conversation. Mike had his leg bouncing, hands fidgeting.

"Wanna go skip rocks?"

"Do you know how?" He asked, easily taking up her offer.

Max looked at him like he'd lost his mind, "uh yeah obviously, do you not?"

"No, how'd you learn?" He asked as they walked towards the lake, Max bending down to pick up
little rocks as they went.

"Robin taught me, you should ask her to show you she's a fucking beast." Will took the pebble she
threw at him, "here, you've gotta hold it tightly with your pointer finger and then rest it against your
thumb, then flick it."
"Like this?" He asked, tossing it, only for the rock to sink immediately, "oh."

"Yeah like that, but not at all."

He rolled his eye, "wow thanks, had no idea."

Max focused on the water, "ya know, I used to have this massive crush on you in middle school
until I realized it was complete bullshit."

"What?" Will asked with widened eyes.

"Yep, I told Lucas about it and he laughed at me."

A smile twitched onto his face, "yeah, probably realized he had no competition."

"Are you that bad with the ladies, Byers?"

He cleared his throat, picking up another rock, "you could say that, yeah."

"Oh come on, I bet all the girls are begging--"

"Max, I'm gay," he said, not daring to look at her.

She stopped moving, "oh...sorry, didn't mean to assume."

He shrugged, "it's fine, I don't really fit the 'stereotype'."

"Hey, football captains can be gay, I bet the whole male student body is banging down your door--
"
Will let out a surprised laugh, lips pulled into a smile, "oh my god, please stop, I promise no one is
'banging down my door' I doubt anyone even knows."

"Everyone's fucking stupid, like me, it's dumb. You're such a boyish guy, but that doesn't mean we
get to just assume you're straight, that's stupid," Max said, skipping another rock, "gay is great."

"Please stop talking," he choked out through his laughter as Max bumped her fist to the chant.

"Hey, I'm being a supportive friend. Do all your friends know?"

He shrugged, "don't know actually, Lucas and Dustin do, Jane assumes I think. We don't really talk
about it. It's just always been something I was aware of."

"Well, thanks for telling me."

Will sent her a smile, "thanks for chanting 'gay is great' to the sun."

She snorted, "anytime."

"Guys! The foods here."

 Chapter 19
Chapter Notes

Complex- Katie Gregson- MacLeod

Max tossed one more rock into the water before dragging Will towards the campsite. Lucas was
carrying most of the boxes, scattering them around on the unoccupied picnic tables.

"How was the hike?" Dustin asked, grabbing a slice.

"Wasn't that great," Jane said, scooting over as Max sat next to her.

Will found an empty spot, looking up at the sky. It was midday now, pushing quickly towards the
evening. He always enjoyed fall, but the cold weather and shorter days weren't a positive part of
the change.

"Did you guys catch anything?" Chrissy asked the group.

"Nope," Will jumped as Eddie plopped down next to him, "didn't even see shit, Lucas was making
the whole thing up."

"Fishing? You're saying I created fishing?"

Eddie stuffed his face, "okay that's not--"

"No, I want you to say that I made fishing up," Lucas pressed, causing snickers to move around the
group.

"I'm onto you Sinclair."

Will smiled, listening as the conversation morphed and changed a million times. Eventually, all the
pizza had disappeared and Steve made it his job to start the fire. The air grew chillier as the sun
began to set. It was beautiful to look at, the warm colors peeking through the trees.

"Steve, stop poking at it, you're going to put it out--"

"I'm doing it fine, Robin," the stuffy teen shot back. Robin rolled her eyes, but continued to hover.

It was nice. Will didn't bother to say much, keeping to himself as the others were immersed in their
own worlds. Eventually, everyone started to break off to their respective tents. That's when Will's
anxieties heightened. The last thing he wanted to do was go into a confined space with Mike.

"Jane, I'm gonna go call mom. Want me to tell her anything?" He asked, standing from the log,
finding an escape before his sister left as well.

"Nope, thanks."

Will didn't even bother glancing at Mike. Only Dustin and Lucas were still up, but he doubted that
would last. The idea of being alone with Jane and Mike was already bringing a headache on.

He made his way down towards the water once again, not having any intention to call his mother.
He'd already been texting her, but it was an easy excuse. Will wrapped his sweatshirt closer,
listening as the water tapped against the rocks. It was hypnotic, the same motion over and over
again allowed his mind to drift off.

Standing by the water allowed the sunset to become less blurred. The orange, pinks, and yellows
meshed together, creating a color only shown for small periods of time each day.

A gasp fell from his mouth as a branch snapped behind him. Will turned around swiftly, regretting
the decision immediately when he saw who was standing there.

Mike had pulled on a grey sweatshirt, and Will caught himself thinking how cozy the elder boy
looked. The warmly lit sky illuminated Mike in a way that was purely artistic. In any other
situation, Will would have insisted in grabbing a pencil and paper to draw the boy in front of him.
"You've been down here for awhile," Mike finally said, walking closer.

"Was talking to my mom."

The curls on Mike's head brushed with the wind, "right."

"What do you want?" He pressed, not wanting to deal with the awkward silence drifting between
them.

"Just thought I'd come make sure you didn't die."

Will let out a short breath, "well I didn't, so--"

"Okay, can you stop being like that?" Mike asked, tone itching with frustration. Just the
implication of that made Will's blood begin to simmer.

"I'm not being like anything, you said you came to check on me, I'm fine, so there's no reason for
you to be here anymore," he crossed his arms, "or you know what, I'll just go--"

"Will, I'm trying to talk to you--"

"Oh, like you've been 'talking to me' all day? You want to do more talking like that? Is that what
you want Mike?" He snapped, searching the other boy's face for some kind of answer.

"That's not fair, I didn't come down here to pick a fight with you--"

"Right, like I believe that for a second. All you've been doing since yesterday is be an asshole--"

"You weren't talking to your mom."

Will felt his shoulders slump for a moment, brows pinched together, "what?"
"You were lying."

"What are you fucking talking about? I'm not lying--"

"God, yes you are. Do you think I'm fucking stupid or something?" Mike's voice raised the
slightest bit. He was pushing back, Will really shouldn't have been surprised.

"Why do you even care so much? So what if I wasn't talking to my mom? Can I not do anything
without asking for your permission?"

"You know that's not what I'm saying--"

"No, actually, I don't know that's not what you're saying. I don't know what you're saying at all.
What the hell even happened? We were fine yesterday--"

Mike cut him off, "yes, and we are fine--"

"So now you're lying to me."

Tense silence spread between them, their eyes locking. Mike had walked closer, but the distance
between them was still drawn in the sand.

"You're mad at me. Why." Will didn't ask it like a question, the statement was firm and something
Mike wouldn't be able to run away from.

"I never said I was mad at you."

"I don't care what you fucking said Mike! You have been finding every reason to glare or fight
with me since this morning, what did I do? Did me walking off during a stupid game of truth or
dare really piss you off?"
Mike pressed his lips together, "I don't know."

"You don't know?"

"I don't know!" The elder boy snapped, hands dropping to his sides.

"So you're mad at me and you don't know why? Or you do know why and it's a shitty reason that
doesn't make any sense? Are you angry I didn't stand around to watch you kiss my sister--"

Mike looked at his sharply, "It was a fucking dare! Are you actually upset about that?"

"That's not-- I don't care if you kissed her--"

"Really? Because you're acting like you care." Mike eyes were moving over his face quickly, "did
you...did you care?"

Something about the question was terrifying. Will swallowed tightly, feeling like he had been
thrusted under a spotlight. Mike was staring at him with a look that didn't make the truth any
easier.

"I don't care. You can kiss my sister all you want, that's fine. All I did last night was walk off to get
some air, that's it. I don't care what you do with your time."

Mike let out a humorless laugh, "you're a fucking liar, you know that?"

"I'm not--"

"You're lying to me! All you ever do is lie to me!" Mike yelled, throwing a hand up in anger.

"That is not fair, you don't get to turn this on me a-and act like I'm the problem. I didn't do
anything yesterday! You acted like an asshole with Chrissy and then ignored me for the rest of the
night--"
"I didn't ignore you, if you wanted to talk to me you could have. Also, in case you forgot, I tried to
talk to you last night and you pushed me away."

"You didn't even bother to apologize--"

"Apologize for what, Will!"

Will's lips parted, feeling stumped as Mike's eyes pierced through him, "I..."

"See? There's nothing, because nothing happened. You're the one that's pushing me away, I keep
trying to get through to you and it's impossible! Fuck, we're talking right now and it's useless
because you don't actually tell me anything!"

"I'm not-- there's nothing wrong with me."

Mike let out an emotionless laugh, "and there you go again. 'I'm fine, I'm fine, nothing's wrong'
that's all you ever fucking say! What the hell am I supposed to do? Shake you until you tell me
what's going on?"

"No, no you don't get to stand there and act like I'm doing something wrong. You're the one who
started any of this! And you did ignore me yesterday, don't make me feel like I'm crazy, you barely
even looked at me--"

"I was right there the whole time! You could have--"

"It seemed like the last thing you wanted to do was have any sort of conversation with me, so I'm
sorry I didn't feel comfortable going up to you."

"Jesus fuck Will, it's not like I walked around having interviews with everyone, you don't see Eddie
out here yelling at me for 'ignoring him'. If that's actually what's bothering you then fine, but just
tell me that," Mike yelled, both of them getting louder with every passing second. Will was just
glad they were far enough away from any other people.
"No, that's not what this is about, it's about how you attached yourself to Jane like a fucking doll
and acted like I dropped off the face of the planet--"

"So I'm not allowed to talk to anyone if it's not you--"

Will felt tears burning in his eyes, "You know that's not what I'm saying Mike! Why can't you just
listen to me? You want me to talk, so I'm telling you how I feel, and you're making me feel like
everything I say is fucking stupid!"

"That's not true! I just don't understand why you're angry--"

"Are we just going to completely ignore that you treated me like shit today or something? Or is that
not something you want to talk about because you can't blame it all on me?"

Mike ran a hand through his hair, "okay, so you're mad about today?"

"I mean, it was pretty shitty--"

"But that's not the main reason you're upset? That's what you're saying?"

Will bit at the inside of his cheek, feeling his bottom lip beginning to quiver, "I don't know."

"This is helpless, if you won't talk to me why am I even wasting my time?"

A tear rolled down his face, "why are you...you never act like this with me. I wasn't going to say
anything, I was going to walk in there last night and not say anything and go to sleep, I wouldn't
have acted any different if you didn't get pissed at me this morning, so you 'wasting your time' is
not my fucking fault."

"Will--"

"You don't get to do this. Why do you think I lie to you? I mean, come on Mike, do you really
think I enjoy telling someone how I feel just so I can be made to feel like I'm fucking stupid and
making stuff up?"

Mike shook his head, and Will finally noticed the dampness on the boy's cheeks, "I don't want to
make you feel like that, I'm not trying to I just-- you're being really difficult and I feel like I can't
understand you and I hate that, alright? I really-- I don't know what's going on okay! And you're
driving me fucking insane!"

The flustered boy, shook his hands, as if attempting to get water off them. His voice was choked
with a frustration Will hadn't heard before.

"I don't know what you want me to do!" He cried, tears streaming down his face, Will used to be
good at confrontation, he didn't have any other choice, but after years of being beat down, he was
too exhausted to keep himself together. Will wanted to sob and scream until whatever was locked
inside of him broke free.

"Help me understand--"

Will shook his head, "there's nothing to understand--"

"Oh my god Will!" Mike snapped, grabbing at his hair as if his brain was about to pop out, "oh my
fucking god! I-I mean what do you want me to do? I can't read your mind, I can't even read your
goddamn face! If you want me to not make you feel stupid then stop acting so fucking..."

"So fucking what Mike? Stupid? Am I stupid? That's what you wanted to say, do it!" Will knew his
voice was a mess, shaking as tears continued to bucket from his eyes.

The water crashed, winds picking up; but Will was sure everything was frozen. Their eyes were
unmoving, looking at each other with an intensity Will couldn't uncover. It felt like everything they
said was in code, the truth lying just under the surface and punching at the ground to get out. A tear
skidded over his lips, dripping into his mouth.

Hurt me, I want you to hurt me so I have a reason to hate you.

"Tell me I'm stupid," he whispered, every inch of his body shaking.

Mike let out a choked sob and squeezed his eyes shut, "stop--"

"No, tell me," he walked forward until he had to tilt his head up to look at the elder teen.

Make me hate you.

"Will..."

He didn't bother to wipe his face, "I'm stupid, right?"

Hate me.

"Say it, j-just say it. I want you to fucking say it Mike," Will's voice was barely audible, words
clogged in his throat.

Make me stop loving you, please.

"I'm stupid," Mike whispered. That was the crack. Will's heart burned as the sobs wrecked through
him, he brought a hand up and punched Mike's chest, but there was no power behind it.

"No, n-no," he broke, head pounding. The tears blurred everything, but Mike was still so clear, a
staple in front of him that Will couldn't forget no matter how hard he tried.

"I'm stupid, Will I'm stupid, I'm stupid," Mike repeated quickly as he attempted to hold onto Will's
moving fist. The taller boy sounded congested, and for the first time, Will saw the snapping pain in
Mike's eyes.

He shook his head, lips shaking as cries threatened to come out. Their faces were inches apart.
Brown met hazel and Will saw something ghost between them. That tie he had tried to cut over and
over again glowed. A string. If Will brought a finger up, he knew there wouldn't be anything there
to touch. Nothing to pull him away from Mike or towards him. It was a choice.

The sun was barely existent now, but there was such a beauty to the way it fell. Though, Will didn't
care about the sun, he'd never liked the brightness of it much; but when it began to hide, truths that
were hidden behind it began to bloom. The ugly, harsh truths most people never wanted anyone to
know about.

Heart-wrenching secrets that could crush someone under them. Will could see them reflected in
Mike's eyes. They were an gruesome, beautiful, and shameful secret.

"I'm stupid," Mike breathed out, the boy's stare looking dazed as his lips parted.

Will sucked in a stiff gasp as the curly-headed teen's hand moved up to his cheeks. It wasn't a
gentle touch or some kind of feathery ghosting. Mike gripped onto him, rings digging into his skin,
not even a finger drifting away from him. It was addicting. Will's mouth parted, puffing out
another breath as he took up every ounce of Mike's attention. Then, the musician's other hand came
up, holding him with the same amount of passion.

"Mike..."

Every touch, every single twitch was felt between their tightly pressed bodies. Will tried to read the
terror on Mike's face, to understand where it might be coming from. He couldn't move, desperate
for anything the beautiful boy in front of him gave. There was nothing soft about the position they
were in, and Will could feel each ring create a divot into his face, and he found himself messed in
the head for wanting them to cut and scar.

"Will," Mike pleaded.

He tried to swallow the lump in his throat, immediately becoming some kind of slave to Mike as
the desperate plea was heard. Reaching a hand up, Will ran it through Mike's hair, not carrying that
it was tangled and roped his fingers in. He yanked the boy forward, their foreheads pressed
together. Mike sucked in a painfully broken sigh as their inflamed and bitten lips brushed.

Will was staring down at Mike's, watching as his own tears began to wet them.

"Please." Mike pulled him closer, as if he was attempting to morph their bodies together.

He finally closed his eyes and slumped, releasing the grip he had on Mike and stepping back as the
other boy floundered to keep the hold on him.
"We can't," he whispered, not being able to bare the utterly shattered look on Mike's face.

"No, no no you can't-- y-you can't do this to me, please just--"

Will pressed his eyes shut, tears dropping into the sand, "we can't, I'm sorry."

"Will--"

He got his feet to move and brushed past Mike, bringing his hands up to cover his ears as the other
end of his string released a heartbreaking sob, one that skidded with pain over and over again.

Eventually, Will crawled back to their tent, his back aching as he tried to keep himself quiet.
Curling tightly into a ball, he laid there wide awake for what felt like hours.

When Mike came in, Will let silent tears roll down his face as he listened to the other try to stifle
his sobs the entire night. The most gut-wrenching torture he could have imagined; and Will was
sure he deserved nothing less.

I love you, I'm so sorry.

 Chapter 20
Chapter Notes

Lorne Balfe- Calling Home

Humiliation. Mike had felt it many times in his life, growing immune to the effects of the disease.
Voice cracking during a performance, failing a presentation in front of a class, falling off stage
during a school play while dressed up like a fox. Not even an actual fox costume, it was the
thinnest pair of red tights, a leotard, and a dream. Mike had practically hit all the marks.

Intimate humiliation was something different.

Having someone stand so close and watch them reach into his chest, yank his heart out, and dangle
it in front of his face was a torture he only now understood. To plead to someone, beg them to want
you only for them to walk away and act like it was nothing.

Act like he was nothing.

In the early hours of the morning, Will had left, leaving Mike alone for the second time. Not that
he minded, the last thing he wanted to do was turn around and talk to the guy that spit in his face
the night before. Closing his eyes was painful, because every time he tried, he was back by the
lake.

Mike pulled the blanket tight around himself, shivering from the tears still pricking his eyes. For
the first time in his life Mike made a choice, he looked at something he wanted, someone, and
chose to let himself feel. The game he kept playing was impossible to ignore any longer, he wanted
Will.

That feeling wasn't reciprocated and he was stupid enough to believe it was. So many questions
stabbed his mind, and Mike didn't know what to do with all of them. He should have walked away,
he shouldn't have even bothered to talk to Will in the first place, then nothing would have
happened. If he'd just shut up and left, then Will wouldn't have had the chance to remind him how
unwanted he'd always be. The embarrassment of gripping onto Will and spewing out desperate
pleas to be wanted back, to be loved and kissed no matter the consequences, no matter how much
he might hate himself for it only to be pushed away was sickening.
A single tear trailed down his face, dripping into his mouth, a perfect reminder that even the
smallest twitch could push him back into a spiraling breakdown.

"Mike?" He didn't move, eyes trained on the side of the tent, "hey Mike are you in there? It's
getting pretty late."

He hoped Robin would just walk away, but should have known is luck was in small supply. The
tent unzipped and the stubborn girl stepped inside.

"Hey are you-- holy shit what the hell happened?" Robin asked, her voice soft as she sat down on
the pile of blankets.

"Nothing," he whispered, cursing himself when he felt a new bubble of cries teasing at his throat.

"Are you okay?"

That was enough. Mike clenched his eyes shut as a sob cut through him, his body already
trembling. He was exhausted.

"Oh my god," Robin breathed out, quickly grabbing him. Mike allowed himself to be cradled in her
arms. "Okay, it's okay...it's okay."

Mike didn't have the energy to hug her back, slumped forward and trying to stifle the never ending
cries.

"I'm so s-stupid," he choked out, a dry cough going along with it.

Robin attempted to run her fingers through his tangled hair, "you're not stupid, fuck-- what
happened?"

He shook his head, wiping his dripping nose. The idea of letting the words out was horrifying. He'd
tried being honest once and that got him nowhere.
"Alright...did someone die?"

"No."

Robin nodded, rocking him the best she could, "good, okay that's good."

Mike felt bad for leaving her with nothing. He shakily grabbed her arm, squeezing her as tight as he
was able to. Apparently crying for hours on end didn't do great things for his strength. A baffling
fact.

"Robin, did you find him?" Eddie asked from outside the tent.

"Uh...kind of."

That was fair, since Mike was sure he looked like some half living corpse.

"What the fuck does that mean? Did Will murder him in his sleep or some shit?"

The name sent a spark of pain through his chest. Mike let out a choppy sigh, trying to keep himself
under control.

"Look, we'll be out in a second," Robin said.

"I'm not leaving." Mike cringed at the sound of his voice, realizing how hoarse it really was.

"Mike, you can't stay in here, but if you do want to you actually have to tell me what's going on."

He sniffed, "just...got into it with my mom on the phone last night."

Apparently he was collecting Will's lies and adding them to his own book. How romantic.
"Shit, is everything okay?"

He shrugged, "no."

"Okay uh...you've gotta get out of here and eat something, everyone's gone--"

"Everyone?" He asked, needing confirmation without directly asking for it. His lie would crumble
the second he said Will's name.

"Think so, Jane dragged Max and Will somewhere, Steve and Lucas are trying to fish again. Don't
know where Chrissy went. Dustin and Eddie are playing cards." Robin ran her fingers through his
hair.

Mike nodded, "okay."

"Great!" Robin snaked her way out of the hold he had on her and shuffled from the tent, leaving the
zipper open. Mike sucked in a deep breath and scooted behind her.

When he stood up, regret filled him immediately. His ears started to ring and he barely processed
his knees buckling until two arms grabbed him.

"Woah," Robin said, slowly helping him to the ground.

"Shit, is everything alright?" Dustin asked, both he and Eddie running over to them,

Mike kept his eyes shut, "sorry, stood up too fast."

Water was being thrusted into his hand, and Mike took a small sip, cheeks heated with
embarrassment as three pairs of eyes stared at him.

"Guys, I'm fine."

"You look like shit dude," Dustin said, helping him to his feet.

Mike ran a hand over his face, "thanks."

"You sick?" Eddie asked.

"Yeah, something like that."

Eventually, he was thrusted down onto a log and Robin shoved a protein bar into his hand. Mike
grimaced down at the dry snack, but took a bite as the girl stared at him.

"Did you get really high last nigh-- wait do you have weed?" Dustin asked, excitement shining in
his eyes.

Eddie pushed Dustin's shoulder, "shit head, he'd tell me if he brought weed."

"I--"

"Wait, you'd tell me right? Bro code."

Mike nodded solemnly, "bro code."

"You're both fucking dumb," Robin muttered, sitting down next to him.

He moved his eyes down towards the grass, "I'm gonna go on a walk."

"Want me to go with you?" Robin asked.

Mike shook his head, standing up slowly as he tossed his trash away. He didn't like having eyes
staring him down, it was suffocating. The woods felt like an open gateway, nothing waiting there
to ask him questions. The wind was cool, holding only a slight warmth to it. He wasn't sure how
long he had wandered until a large oak tree came into view.

The branches slumped with age, but the leaves didn't look worn. They were newly bloomed warm
colors, encapsulating the surrounding area with a beauty no picture could capture. Stepping
forward, Mike sat down against it, wincing as his body hit the hard ground. Apparently he was far
enough away that any sound from people were muffled and extinguished.

He grazed his eyes across the ground, rubbing his shoe into the dry dirt below. The leaves were
shriveled up and dead, not having their life force to keep the color. Something in the corner of his
view drew him in. Narrowing his eyes, Mike reached his hand out.

It was green.

The leaf had visibly been ripped apart or stepped on, but the color was still visible. In the rows of
brown shades, the dark green stuck out to him. Compared to the others, it was small, nearly
impossible to spot unless someone was looking for it. Mike carefully moved it around in his
fingers, almost terrified he'd break it farther.

"You're pretty," he said to himself, the tiny broken leaf making a smile tug on his lips.

Mike scooted up enough that he could place the barely visible leaf into his pocket, patting it into
place.

He pulled his knees close, resting his chin on them. It wasn't the most comfortable position, his
jaw squeezing in a way that shot pain up to his ears. Mike's hand was itching to grab his phone. He
wanted his mom.

That thought alone caused him to blink quickly, holding out hope that his eyes would just dry up
and never leak again. Even if he was able to call his mom and be confident she'd pick up, Mike
didn't even know what to say. She didn't know anything about him anymore, he'd be surprised if
she even knew he was gone.

He'd purposefully not told them he was leaving in hopes they'd call or text. Mike wanted them to be
mad, to care that he may have been missing. There was nothing. It was a stupid trick, a pathetic
one at that. Trying to force someone to care about him had never worked. No one seemed to want
to take up the job.

Mike ran a hand through his hair, letting out a long puff of hair. He wanted to get himself together,
but it felt nearly impossible. The second he began to feel okay, he was forced back to the night
before. Will was there, sobbing and yelling at him. The guilt, anger, and pure want that was
coursing through his veins came up.

The pain. It was painful to be forced to think, to feel the way Will made him feel. It was raw and
something he couldn't run away from. Not when it was being thrown in his face over and over
again. It didn't matter how much he begged, he bared his heart out to the younger teen and was
pushed away.

He remembered crumbling to the ground heartbroken, watching as Will walked away from him.
Mike wasn't even worth his time, Will didn't bother to turn around. He left him there. Mike was
falling in love with someone who didn't want him.

----------

Mike hid away for most of the day, doing anything in his power to avoid going back to the
campsite. He made sure to text Robin and tell her he was fine, but when the sun finally started to
make its way down, Mike forced his feet to make their way back. The sky seemed darker than it
should have been, and it wasn't hard to figure out what that meant.

As he grew closer, voices became clear. Mike's heart was pounding as he came out of the clearing,
a few eyes immediately turning towards him.

"Mike! There you are," Jane said with a warm smile. It was a nice smile. Nice, soft, untainted.

"Hey, sorry just...needed to get some air." He let her pull him over to the fire, trying to keep his
eyes from wandering.

Though, that was nearly impossible. It seemed that he had developed a new skill of being able to
sense wherever Will was in a room. Swallowing, he couldn't help but look to his side, heart and
stomach taking a few deep dives when their eyes locked. Mike's breath caught; he didn't know
what he was reading, but the look Will was sending his way was agonizing.
Mike didn't let himself stare for long, knowing it would send him into a broken downfall.

"Wheeler, I brought your guitar out," Max's voice cut into his thoughts. He shot his gaze to her,
seeing the mischievous smile on her face.

"What?"

"Yeah, come on sing that song we were doing last week, Robin will sing with you," Eddie said,
tossing a little branch into the fire.

Max walked over and thrusted the instrument into his hands. He cleared his throat, looking down at
the strings. Everyone was silent, patiently waiting around for him to do something. Mike cursed
himself for not staying hidden in the woods. The song Max was talking about wasn't one he was
interested in singing again.

Unfortunately, he didn't know how to fight it without being suspicious. Mike kept his head down,
grazing his fingers over the cords as music rang out into the open,

"I guess before I met you," he sang shakily, "I didn't know better, but you swept in out of nowhere,
and I thought I'd never go there."

Mike blinked away tears, trying to keep himself steady. Those eyes, they were cutting into him.

"And you set the bar, for this stubborn heart, and when you met my family, everyone knew that you
had me whipped. I ain't ever loved no one like that."

He lifted his head, gaze barely pivoting to the side, but it was enough. Will looked at him with
something Mike couldn't even begin to decipher.

"I ain't ever loved no one like that," Will met his eye for only a moment before looking away, "and
when I said I loved you I didn't care..."

He trailed off, fingers hitting the wrong string and coming to a halt. Mike squeezed his eyes shut
and bent his head in shame, tightly gripping onto the guitar. It was all too much, too loud but not
loud enough.

"Mike?" Jane whispered just as the first raindrop fell.

"Uh sorry...forgot the words," he said, sending her a tight smile, gaze darting to Will for only a
moment.

"It was really pretty, Mike." Chrissy sent him an encouraging little smile, and not for the first time,
he felt guilt consume him for being standoffish with her.

"Hey, it's gonna start raining we should all get inside." Max stood and started throwing a tarp over
anything not water proof. It was a good distraction and everyone slowly started following behind.
Mike put his guitar back in it's case and stored it under the tarp as well, knowing there wasn't room
for it in any tent.

Tent. Mike had to go back in the tent.

That thought alone made him freeze. As the rain began to pick up, he wasn't given a moment to try
and get out of it. When Mike was shuffling his way inside after Will, that nauseous feeling came
back up. Taking his time zipping the tent, he attempted to think of any reason to run back to the
rain and drown himself in it.

He sat down, fidgeting with the lamp and turning it on, illuminating the small space with light. It
wasn't enough to brighten up everything, but left a warm hue around them. Mike bit as his bottom
lip, holding his flannel tight.

Every muscle in his body was tight, being able to feel the invisible tension ringing out between
them. He licked at his bottom lip, finally glancing over at Will who was pointedly staring at the
'ceiling'. It was an awkward position to be sitting in, but part of Mike hoped it was uncomfortable,
maybe that would bring him a little peace.

The rain beat down onto the tent, but it wasn't anything too extreme, still not loud enough to drown
out the sound of his torture.

He stared at Will, only shifting his eyes and sucking in a breath when the younger man moved his
head down. Mike wanted to scream, maybe try and break Will's annoyingly strong arms in half.
"Mike--"

"Shut up," he said, sniffling as that same hurt from the night before began to ooze out.

"I just...I wanted to say that I'm sorry--"

He shrugged, bottom lip trembling, "for what? Nothing happened, obviously nothing happened
because it doesn't really seem like you give a fuck s-so why should I care? I don't care, it's fine."

Will went quiet, which only helped to prove Mike's point farther. Maybe it was foolish of him to
think there would be a fight back, that Will would make any attempt to prove him wrong.

"I didn't mean to hurt you, okay?" Will said softly.

Mike turned to meet his eye, "right."

"Come on, Mike I--"

He pressed his fists to his eyes, wanting to relieve some of the pressing tension. His hands were
trembling and it felt like every inch of his body was ignited with shattered glass. Mike's breaths
were becoming ragged.

"Mike, Mike please...please stop you're going to hurt yourself." Will's airy and low voice drifted
into his ears, coming closer with every second.

"I-I can't do this with y-you I can't, I--" His teeth were chattering at this point, making it difficult to
get a coherent word out.

"Mike," Will breathed out, and a hand gently cusped his wrist. A breath got stuck in his throat at
the contact.
His harsh gasping kept the ambience in the tent, rain attempting to beat down on them only to be
stopped by some flimsy material. Will was on his knees in front of him, one hand holding onto his
arm. Mike kept his teary eyes up, watching as Will's gaze followed the tear that slipped down his
cheek, tracing the lines of his face.

Will was pretty. So pretty. Mike hated himself for thinking that, because Will wasn't supposed to
be like that. It was the wrong word, but in the depths of his mind he could think it, no one could be
angry about the truth if it was hidden. Handsome was wrong, no matter how true it may be, it felt
wrong on his tongue.

Pretty. So very pretty.

Mike wished his breathing would calm down, but it was like his body knew it was no use. Tears
would never leave him, the pain would forever morph itself into his being and become normal.
Maybe then it would dull, the crying would become a routine instead of some surprise party. He
could handle that, he knew that kind of pain.

This. Whatever was happening in this moment was not something he could deal with over again
until his breaths finally stopped. Mike choked out a wet sob and brought a hand up to smack Will's
chest, feeling a sense of Deja vu overtake him. He still had the ghost bruises from the night before.

"Stop, Mike-- Mike come on stop--" Will tried to grab his shaky limbs to steady him but it was no
use.

"N-No I want you to feel it, I want you to feel what you did to m-me I w-want--" He sobbed, "why
don't you c-care? W-Why--"

"Hey, hey look at me, Mike please."

He slammed his eyes shut as Will's hands moved up to hold his face, attempting to keep him from
moving. They were close, so close that their whispered voices sounded like yells. Mike gripped
onto Will's wrist.

"You don't get to do this to me," he breathed out.

"Do what?"
Mike peeled his eyes open, "no, n-no you know. You're making fun of me, I know you are, you
don't fucking c-care--"

"You think I don't care?" Will asked, his voice choked. It was a sound Mike recognized all too
well, he stared up at the younger boy, once again wondering how they could be so close while still
not having stepped in the same room.

"Why would I ever think you did?" He said, searching Will's face for an answer, "what else was I
supposed to do if I-I wanted to tell you that I--"

He cut himself off, attempting to swallow down the words.

"That you what?"

"It doesn't matter, none of this fucking matters because you didn't even bother to s-stay there last
night, you ran away like you always do--"

"Mike--"

He ignored that, trying to move away again, "and you left me there like I was nothing so how am
I..."

It all stopped.

The motion was soft, barely detectable, but it caused every inch of his mind to come to a halt. Lips
brushed against his, the taste of his own tears stamping them together. Will's hands were still
gripping his face, left fingers dancing towards his hair. He was almost sure the moment was a
dream, maybe the tears had finally drowned him, leaving only the memory of his darkest desire.
Mike's mouth was still parted, his eyes only dusting closed before Will pulled away from him,
looking utterly petrified.

"Sorry--"
Mike let out a trembling breath, "no."

"What?"

"No you're being fucking mean, you're being really fucking mean don't do that," he said, once
again attempting to punch Will's chest again, this time the hazel-eyed teen didn't try to stop him.
"You don't get to do that to me now."

"I thought--"

"You thought what? That's what I wanted?"

Will let out a short breath, glancing away, "then what do you want from me?"

"I want you to want to kiss me," he said with a trembling voice, trying to get Will to look at him
again. "I-I don't want you to do it because you think that's what I fucking want or some other
bullshit you're going to make up and lie about. I want you to want to kiss me."

Will looked at him sharply, eyes having completely lost any trace of green. Mike felt his breath
catch, the cool tears on his face now becoming burning hot.

"You want me to want to kiss you?" Will's voice was low, lower than he'd ever heard it. Mike tried
to keep his heart in place.

"Yes, I want you to want to kiss--"

Mike's next gasp was lost somewhere in Will's mouth. Hands cupping his face and yanking him in.
This time he saw it coming, he knew and it was intoxicating, more hypnotic than he ever thought a
kiss could be. Will almost tipped forward, but Mike brought his hands up and gripped the younger
boy's waist, pulling him closer.

It felt right, like they had practiced the movement a million times. Mike dragged a hand up Will's
back, gripping onto the hem of his shirt for a moment before shoving it into the messy cloud of
hair. Mike used that leverage to draw Will closer, their lips surely becoming bruised.
"We've gotta..." Will tried to say, but it was nearly impossible to make out his words as he didn't
even attempt to cut the kiss.

Mike cupped Will's jaw, making sure the younger boy had nowhere to run. After a moment of
pulling and pulling, Will finally collapsed into his lap, knees falling to either side of his waist.

"Just shut up," He said, tilting his head to the other side, causing their noses to bump together
harshly. He loved it.

It was open and uncoordinated, passion and heat Mike had been trying to find for years coming out
with only a light touch. Now he wanted more. Once it was given, he couldn't let it slip.

"Kiss me." Mike knew it was a stupid plea since there wasn't anything else Will was spending his
time doing at the moment.

"Mike--"

"Kiss me..."

Will let out the smallest sound into his mouth, trembling hands dragging through Mike's hair. It
was dizzying, the tent and rain becoming background to their sticking lips slamming together.

Pulling back for a second, Mike stared into Will's eyes. Their breathing was ragged and tangling
with the sound of a storm. He ran a trembling thumb across Will's cheek to collect his still falling
tears. Mike didn't know when the stubborn teen started crying, but based on his still wet face, it
couldn't have been long ago.

"We can't do this...I-I can't do..." Will trailed off, his voice cracking.

Mike nodded slowly, "you've got pretty eyes, you know that?"

The boy let out a watery laugh, "they're just brown--"

"They're not brown." Mike moved the hand from Will's hair to cup his other cheek, "you've got
some green in there."

Will shook his head, shoulders beginning to flinch with the threat of tears. Mike pressed his eyes
shut, that dropping and helpless feeling making its way into his body. He tugged Will's face closer
to his.

"I'm so sorry," Will gasped, beginning to collapse against his chest, "I'm sorry."

"What's your favorite song?" He whispered after a moment, voice breaking at the end. Will curled
around his body, sobbing into him. Mike didn't know how long he could fight the heartache.

"W-What?" Will choked out.

He fluttered his eyes shut, "your favorite song, what is it?"

"I don't k-know--"

"You know, come on tell me..." Mike ran his hands through the boy's hair, "j-just tell me, okay?"

"I-It's-- fuck I don't even--" Will tried to talking through his cries, his voice not audible.

"Can you try and hum it for me? I've got great ears," he whispered, pressing Will's face against his
shoulder.

It took a moment, but finally the softest tune slipped from Will's sealed mouth. Mike felt his lips
flinch into a grin, picking it up after a few seconds.

"That's a good one."

"It's s-stupid, my mom used to play it in the car on the way to school-- it's so stupid--" The younger
boy cried, not getting a word out without his voice cracking.

Mike felt a tear slip down his face, "and I'd give up forever to touch you, cause I know that you feel
me somehow."

The reaction was almost immediate, the tension overtaking Will's body began to dissipate.

"You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be, and I don't wanna go home right now..." he
whispered, barely singing the words, "and all I can taste is this moment, and all I can breathe is
your life. When sooner or later it's over, I just don't wanna miss you tonight..."

"I'm sorry."

"Will--"

The younger boy pulled back, not looking at him, "I shouldn't have kissed you, I shouldn't have
done anything and now I just--"

"We don't have to talk about it," he said, pinching his eyes shut as the words came out. They hurt,
but if it meant Will wouldn't run away, he'd say them. He'd say them and mean it because then he
wouldn't have to confront how utterly terrified he was.

"I..." Will trailed off, "okay."

"Okay?"

The boy nodded, "okay."

Mike didn't know if there was anything else he could do to hurt himself more, but looking into
Will's clouded eyes, he knew that whatever was going to happen next might be the snap. It was
hard to see pain light from someone as perfect as Will, so pretty, pretty and broken.

Will was beautiful, and maybe it was Mike's tainted hands that ripped him. He'd always had a
ruining touch.
 Chapter 21
Chapter Notes

TW: Touches on subjects of heavy mental and some physical abuse. Please please be
cautious, if any of this is too much for you, please feel free to comment and ask for a
summary on the chapter, I would be happy to give one.

4 years ago

"Mom!" Will through the door, making sure to take off his shoes and place them to the side.

"Stop yellin' in the house."

Will felt the joy in his chest sink, growing into a nonexistent puddle. He lowered his head, trying to
seem more invisible than any person could be.

"Sorry dad," he muttered.

The man walked into the entry way. Will had been too confident, he'd memorized his father's
schedule to perfection, knowing each time he could possibly be home. There was 7:30 pm, which
was when work finished, 11:15 pm, or 2 am. 4:25 after practice let out was not a time he'd usually
be home. Will should have been safe.

"How was football today?" The man asked, beer bottle hanging in his left hand.

Will pursed his lips together, "um, i-it was--"

"Oh come on kid, we talked about the stuttering, speak up, let me hear ya."

He nodded, "it was okay."

"Just okay?"

He shuffled his feet, not quite knowing how to answer the question. He'd never been a very good
liar.

Will bit at his bottom lip, "yeah just...it's a little hard for me I guess, the older boys say I'm too
small, and I think that maybe they're--"

"Hey," his dad snapped, crouching down, "you're my son, and we're not gonna let you embarrass
me like your big brother did, alright? If it's hard for you, then you push yourself until you're
throwin' up, that's how you get better. You can't afford to be careless, you gotta get sharp,
stubborn, structured. Three S's right?"

The bottle hung between them.

"Yeah, okay dad."

The man crossed his arms, "why don't we go out back and practice?"

Will tightened his hold on the paper in hand. He had done a good job at hiding it, it was a special
piece.

"I um, I'm a little tired--"

"Come on, I can help ya out." He couldn't say no, that wasn't a word allowed in his vocabulary.
Will tried not to flinch as his dad gripped his shoulder. The hold was always too tight, and he knew
the man was aware of that. "What's that?"

His stomach sunk, "oh it's nothing, just picked it up outside--"

Will knew it was a stupid lie. No one would believe that, he wouldn't have believed that. It was
stupid, he was so stupid.
When his dad snatched it up, Will didn't bother to fight. He'd always lose anyway. Casting his eyes
down, he counted the marks on the wood, using it as a short distraction.

"Thought we were done with this," his dad said lowly.

Will swallowed, "well um, mom's birthday is tomorrow and I thought--"

"Thought what? She'd want this shit?" The man spat, "we could of gone to the store and bought her
something nice, she wouldn't want this, it's crap."

"She said she liked when I made stuff for her." Will cursed his voice for not coming out confident
like he wanted it to.

His dad's eye twitched, "watch your mouth, when I speak, you don't speak back, you understand
that?"

"But dad I--"

Will's cheek stung, head snapping to the side. It wasn't something that could surprise him anymore,
no matter how much he wanted it to.

"Do you understand?" The man bent down, a harsh grip on his arm. Will flinched at that, feeling
uncleaned nails digging into his skin.

"Yes."

Will was being yanked forward and pulled through the house. He tried to keep his footing up,
knowing his father wouldn't stop moving even if he did end up falling over. They barely stopped at
the kitchen, it was such a quick motion. Will watched as his work was crumbled up and tossed in
the trash, uncared for and forgotten.

He couldn't cry, the weakness that came with tears would cause his dad to seethe; but as the back
door was opened, and he was forced into the open yard, Will still felt like he was staring at the
trashcan. Hoping he'd be tossed in there as well. Uncared for and forgotten.
Anything was better than this.

"Alright, go get the ball from the shed."

Will had his lips pulled into a tight line as they threatened to shake. He'd always hated the
backyard, it was where his dad insisted on doing cookouts and forcing Will to stand over a grill and
sweat. Sometimes, he feared if the man pushed him a little closer, he would sink right into the
burning heat.

The football was rolled in the corner. Will grabbed it, hands feeling itchy the second he picked it
up. It was odd that such a small and unimportant object could be so haunting.

"Hurry up!"

Will sucked in a breath and scurried out of the shed, continuously hopping the ball from hand to
hand, as if it was too hot to keep a hold of.

"Alright, we're gonna do some drills." His dad walked over and snatched the ball, "if you want to
be good, you've got to be fast too, yeah?"

Will didn't care about being good, he wanted to never look at another football in his life.

"Yeah," he reluctantly agreed.

He shouldn't have. Will should have never said yes, but no matter how many times he tries to act
like he has control, it was useless.

"Move faster! No wonder the boys are telling you that you're shit, come on move!"

Will didn't want to cry, he couldn't cry. The heat outside was suffocating as he sprinted around the
yard, trying to catch the flying ball in the air. He failed every time.
"D-Dad it's too much--"

The man walked over and yanked him off the ground, "it's not too much until you get it, alright?"

Will wiped his forehead, "I'm trying, please can we stop--"

He wasn't able to finish his sentence as the ball was thrown into his stomach, causing him to
stumble back.

"You're too weak, your mother did this to you that fucking-- if you ain't good at something, you
keep going until it hurts, you get that?"

Will nodded shortly, feeling a single tear poking at his eye. He couldn't lose again, if he got better
then it would all stop and he could go inside and sort through the trash can.

So he tried, he ran and ran until his legs were nothing but useless sticks. Eventually, the callouses
on his hands took place as the ball slotted against them.

"P-Please can we--"

"Go again!"

Will ran one more time before his stomach began to turn uncomfortably. Every inch of his body
became sluggish as he collapsed to his knees, a gag burning in his throat.

"There you go! That's my boy!" His dad clapped as Will watched his lunch spill onto the grass
below him.

Push yourself until you're throwin' up.

He let out a sob, throat burning as acid came up, every bit of food already out. After a moment, the
only thing he could hear was his ragged breathing. Will wanted to claw at his skin and jump out of
it, if he could scream, just once, that would be the moment.
But no noise came out, and Will felt something lock inside of him. He'd done something right, his
dad was proud of him. He should have been happy.

He was happy.

----------

Will stumbled forward, choking on a gag as the toilet came into view. Sweat dripped into his eyes
and he tried to grip the cool glass. He didn't bother to swallow or try to force it away, body going
numb as he lost his food for the day. It was a routine, Will knew what to do. They'd won. He
should have been happy.

He was happy.

"Byers! You good in there?"

Wiping his mouth, Will stood and flushed the toilet, "yeah."

Steve was standing outside the door as he walked out, hair still dripping from the shower he'd
obviously taken. The game had been home, which Will always hated. People liked to come up after
and rave about how great of a job they did. It made the vomit he wasn't able to get out the first time
laugh at him. If they really did a good job then he'd be collapsed on the field.

"You look pale, you sure? I told you to eat more today."

Will cleared his throat, "you know I'm fine."

"Fine, alright, you should go get cleaned up, we're heading over to the gig soon."

Oh.
He'd completely forgotten about that. Will swallowed, wincing from the burn in his throat. It had
only been a week since the camping trip, but no amount of time could heal what he had done. He
was waiting for something to drop, a snap that he was much too horrified to make.

"Okay, I'll meet you outside?"

"Sure," Steve said, swinging his backpack on, "don't take too long."

Will nodded, making his way back towards the locker room. The halls were quiet, leaving him
alone to think. Which was never a positive thing, at least not anymore. There were many reasons
for that, but the most pressing one was that he couldn't go a few seconds without thinking about
what Mike's lips felt like.

Think about how he didn't get enough time with them. It was selfish to think like that, that next
morning everything had felt broken and Will couldn't even look at him, he still couldn't. It wasn't
like Mike was making much of an effort either.

We don't have to talk about it.

That should have been a relief, but it left Will feeling like he was seconds away from blowing up.
Talking about it made it all too real, which was something he couldn't handle, but not talking about
it made it not real, and he couldn't handle that either. Truly it was some kind of dark spell.

He was selfish. Some kind of monster that was making all the wrong choices. Jane had been
ecstatic all week, having had an hour long conversation with their mom about how her first kiss
went. All Will could do was sit there and try not to rip his hair out.

Shame. It was all-consuming.

To hear his mom's genuine excitement as she and Jane bonded together over the milestone made
breathing difficult. All he's ever wanted to do was make her proud, and he sat there knowing he'd
made out with Jane's long-term crush and first kiss only two days later.

He was disgusting. Disgusting for doing it, and disgusting for wanting to do it again and again
until the feeling of Mike's lips overtook every memory in his mind.
Will let the hot water roll down his back, the last thing he had an interested to do was get out and
voluntarily go anywhere he knew Mike would be. He'd done such a good job at hiding, making
himself belief the whole weekend had been some kind of fever dream. The lying thing was getting
so easy he was turning to delusion. Having to look into Mike's eyes and accept that simply wasn't
true was a reality he couldn't accept.

Eventually, he couldn't hide anymore and stepped out. Will avoided looking in any mirrors and
pulled on his jeans, a long-sleeved black shirt and a flannel. Dustin liked to make fun of the way he
layered clothes, but Will enjoyed the feeling of being hidden. Having his skin exposed wasn't the
safest tactic.

"Took you long enough," Steve said as he got into the backseat.

"Sorry, got distracted."

Dustin snorted, "by what? Your--"

He shoved the boy's shoulder, "ew shut up."

"I didn't even say anything!"

"Is that what you were doing in the shower Dusty?" Lucas said cheekily, leaning up towards the
passenger seat.

Dustin swatted Lucas' hand away, "shut up, you know I'm not quick--"

"Okay ew, ew we are not talking about this, get back in your seat Sinclair." Steve sent them a stern
glare through the rear view mirror. Eyes narrowed on Will.

"Why are you looking at me? I didn't do anything," Will asked, glancing out the window.

"I don't trust you Byers."

His stomach sank. Fear. Steve was kidding, he knew that. It was a harmless joke. He didn't know
anything, there's no way that he could.

Will rolled his eyes, "if you keep staring at me and not the road, you're going to crash you're
precious baby."

"Don't even joke about that," Steve snapped, causing Lucas to let out a snort.

The rest of the short drive was filled with Dustin and Lucas bickering about something that
happened during the game with a splash of Steve telling them to shut up. Will couldn't find any
energy to get himself involved.

When they pulled up to the house, Will was almost worried it would shake off of the ground and
tip forward. Cars were scattered around the road and filling the driveway, he felt bad for any
neighbors nearby.

"Sucks that we're late," Lucas said as they started making their way inside.

Will sent his friend a little smile, knowing why he was so adamant about them making the gig. He
and Max had been attached at the hip all week, and even with Will's internal downfall, he was
excited for his friend.

"It's fine, they only started a few minutes ago." Will's voice was barely ghosting over the loudness
that filled the house.

"Hey guys! How'd it go?" Jane ran up to them, a bounce in her step.

"It was good! How far in are they?" Lucas asked, not being subtle whatsoever.

Jane put on a knowing smile, "started a few minutes ago."

"See?" Will said.

"Is Chrissy here yet? She said she was coming with Heather." Dustin looked around the room,
which was probably useless since it was impossible to make out anyone's face.

"Don't think so, she wanted to go home first anyway."

Will crossed his arms, feeling uncomfortable from the amount of people that had already brushed
past him.

"You okay? You look pale."

"That's what I said!" Steve yelled over the music.

Jane rolled her eyes, "great job, you made the observation of the century and then did nothing
about it."

"You're both horrible, you know that?"

Neither of them bothered to answer him as Jane turned her attention back. Will sent her a tiny grin,
hoping she'd drop the whole subject.

"Really though, you okay?"

"I'm fine, it's cold out."

"Being cold makes your cheeks red."

Will pursed his lips, "well it's different for me."

"That's not how it works--"

"Are we going to go watch them play or not?"

Jane scrunched her nose up, "well are you seconds away from passing out?"

"I hope so."

Her shoulders deflated, "fine, lets go, but you're telling me what happened when we get home."

Will needed to get better at remembering to pinch his cheeks. He was being messy, that wasn't a
trait that could be in his wheelhouse.

"How drunk do you think Steve's gonna get?" Jane asked as they walked away from the group,
Lucas already having found his front row seat.

"Don't know, but I already took his keys." Will held them up, causing the younger girl to let out a
joyous laugh.

"Mike said he'd play a drinking game with me after their set."

He crossed his arms, "no."

"What?"

"No, you're not doing that. It's not safe."

Jane scoffed, "I wasn't asking for your permission."

"I don't care, you're not getting shitfaced or something." Will kept his eyes trained forward, trying
to ignore Mike's voice seeping into his brain.

"I'm gonna do whatever--"

"Can you just not get drunk? Please?"

She was quiet for a moment, "alright fine, I won't get drunk, but I'm still gonna play."

"Fine," he said, not wanting to fight with her.

The person in front of him moved, and Will missed the coverage almost immediately. Now he had
nothing to hide behind and had a perfect view of the makeshift stage. His heart flipped.

Mike always had slightly crazed hair, his curls flying in different directions and tending to flutter
above his eyes. When he was performing, it was hypnotic, making him look like some kind of
fallen angel. Mike was wearing black jeans, and a think blue T-shirt with the sleeves rolled up, a
little style trait Will noticed the elder boy enjoyed.

The signature rings were there, and if Will focused for only a moment, he could feel them against
his skin. His eyes blurred at the thought, once again wishing they had scarred him, cut long and
tattooed lines into his skin.

Mike's long fingers wrapped around the microphone, his guitar placed to the side, unneeded. He
really was a natural performer.

"My lovers got humor, he's the giggle at a funeral, knows everybody's disapproval, I should've
worshipped her sooner," Mike's voice rang out, causing everyone to zero in on him. Will was
almost jealous that other people were able to look at the curly-headed teen just as he was. "If the
heavens ever did speak she's the last true mouthpiece, every Sunday's getting more bleak, a fresh
poison each week."

"I think they get better every time," Jane said, her voice airy and star struck.

"We were born sick, you heard them say it."

Will couldn't respond, regretting not having run sooner. There was no way Mike should have been
able to find him, it felt like a joke; but their eyes locked, as if there was something holding them
together and making it impossible to hide. To not feel each other. He swallowed tightly, knowing
he needed to look away but not being able to. He wasn't given the gift of willpower, definitely no
ounce of it when it came to Mike Wheeler.

"My church offers no absolutes he tells me worship in the bedroom, the only heaven I'll be sent to
is when I'm alone with you," Mike's voice shot into his ears and refused to come out the other side,
Will tightened his arms around himself, lips parting as Mike's slightly lidded eyes refused to look
away. "I was born sick."

Nothing about what they were doing felt subtle, maybe it wasn't. Will was utterly helpless to it all,
Mike seemed to pull that out of him. The harsh light on the other boy allowed Will to almost read
his eyes. They weren't hiding anything, but Will still couldn't understand the language they spoke.

"I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies, I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife,
offer me my deathless death, good god let me give you my life."

Someone in front of Will slowly turned around, a look of confusion on their face. Then those eyes
found him. His heart raced and he glanced to them, seeing something he didn't want to see.
Suspicion.

Will sucked in a breath and snapped his head down, trying to drown Mike's voice out to collect his
thoughts. He was stupid, careless.

Get sharp, stubborn, structured. Three S's, right?

"You okay--"

"I need to use the bathroom," he rushed out, barely patting Jane's arm as he forced himself out of
the crowd.

Will's ears were ringing as he attempted to get past the hoards of unaware teenagers. Mike was
rebellious, he knew that, it was one of his beautifully irritating traits. Unfortunately, it caused a lot
of issues, specifically for the people -or in his case- person under the microscope.

When he finally found a bathroom, he slammed the door behind himself, trying to breathe. He just
needed to breathe, or stop breathing all together, either one would be great. Jane was right there and
didn't seem to notice anything. Though the issue wasn't with Will staring, they were performing, of
course he'd stare.

Mike staring was the problem. Staring and not seeming bothered by the fact that he was staring,
part of Will wanted to convince himself that the elder boy just zoned out, but at this point Will
knew his eyes well enough. Mike was anything but lost. They were sharp and zeroed in, unmoving
with a focus most people couldn't dream of having.

A game. He wanted to play a game.

Will couldn't afford a game.

 Chapter 22
Chapter Notes

Love Is A Battlefield- Pat Benatar

Will gave himself a tour of the house.

He hated it.

It had never been that enjoyable to be blasted under fluorescent light. Not that the overhead
lighting was even on, but he could tell it was unpleasant just from the style. Besides that, it was too
large, a murder house if he had to give it a name. The halls were long and never ending, walls
probably smacked with years of grinded up dirt and badly aimed cat piss. He never understood the
desire for carpeting, though Will was aware of the fact that some people didn't have the money to
get it removed, but what he was looking at seemed recently installed.

A horrendous choice if anyone were to ask him. Sadly, it didn't seem like the house owners were
interested in his interior design opinions.

He wasn't sure how much time had gone past, but eventually the sound of Mike's voice drifted off,
informing him they'd finished their set. Now the house was filled with the booming sounds of 80s
music.

We are strong, no one can tell us we're wrong

It seems the ugly carpet owners had a specific taste. Songs about people being shunned from the
church because of their sexuality and the bops to a sweat filled jazzercise workout. Or a motorcycle
gang dance routine, they were interchangeable options.

Searching our hearts for so long

Will had gone through the same halls over and over again, feeling like he was working on
autopilot. He was hiding, a trait that he'd always been ashamed of. Instead of confronting and
dealing with his issues, he ran away.
As he got stuck on straightening a painting in the hall, a loud roar of shocked cheers came from the
living room, causing his interest to peak.

"Oh it's fucking over you for Wheeler!"

Both of us knowing, love is a battlefield

Will froze. Nothing about that sentence was good. It was actually the complete opposite, it was
bad, extremely bad. Without another thought, his feet were moving towards the commotion.
Getting through hoards of people was already horrible, but trying to fight his way around drunk
teenagers was level impossible.

"Excuse me," he said, pushing his way forward until he could see.

His heart stunted. Mike was standing there with an empty glass in hand, his eyes widened with
horror. Across from him was Jason. Dripping wet and wiping his eyes.

You're begging me to go, then making me stay, why do you hurt me so bad?

It wasn't hard to piece two and two together. People were standing around, utterly useless, looking
at the scene with surprise.

"If you think you're gonna get away with shit like that it's fucking over, you're a weak--"

Will didn't think and practically fell forward, rather dramatically announcing his appearance. A
few eyes snapped in his direction, causing his face to flush with embarrassment.

It would help me to know, do I stand in your way

"Uh...hi." Will straightened himself out, brushing his hands against his jeans.
"The fuck do you want Byers?" Jason asked, seeming just as confused as he was. Really, Will
hadn't planned very far past this point.

And the point he was at was just improv, so now he was under an unwanted spotlight.

Or am I the best thing you've had?

"Just wanted to...check in," he tried, narrowing his eyes in hopes that line would give him enough
time to think.

He glanced over to Mike, the flush on his cheeks growing when he saw the tiny smile lit on the
elder boy's face. Will really went in over his head with this one.

Will looked back to Jason and cleared his throat, "uh so, I just thought--"

"We, we thought that..." Mike added in, his cheeky smile drawing back on. The taller boy walked
over to him, eyes widened, a silent pamphlet of instructions.

And I'm chained to your side

"Since your birthday is..."

Mike's face brightened, "yes! Your birthday, my family has always done this thing where we-- well
it's kind of like a cleansing ceremony."

"What the fuck are you on?"

Will tried not to face palm, "it's an old tradition, sometimes he gets confused that not everyone does
it, right?"

Heartache to heartache, we stand

"Right, yes I just forget. My mom says my brains my only flaw," Mike said, nodding along to the
outrageous and unbelievable lie. Really, it might have been a better idea to just run, but by the look
of it, Justin had a hoard of goons just waiting to start a fight.

"I don't think that's-- okay, what he's trying to say is that...he didn't throw..." He glanced at Mike,
trying to piece the story together.

Love is a battlefield

"Throw that drink in your face out of bad blood, or from bad blood, whichever it is. Is it bad--"

Searching our hearts for so long

Will crossed his arms, pinching his brows together in fake thought, "yes I think it's bad blood, you
didn't do it with the intention of having bad blood--"

"Or there isn't bad blood between us."

"Yes no bad blood..." Wil trailed off, clearing his throat, "the blood is just, it's great. Good bonding
blood."

"Great bonding blood."

Both of us knowing, love is a battlefield

The room was almost silent other than the banging music around them. Will pressed his eyes shut
for a moment after taking a glance at Mike's much too big, and slightly mocking, smile. The
confused stares they were getting didn't seem to be helping the situation.

"Just...fantastic blood--"

"Shut up," Jason snapped. Will pressed his mouth shut and nodded, desperately trying to think of a
way to get out of this situation. Unfortunately, the blond didn't seem to have lost any of his anger.
"Do you both think I'm fucking stupid?" Jason asked, walking closer to them. Will instinctively
thrusted his hand out, gently pushing Mike farther behind him.

"Okay, look man, lets just calm down alright? I don't think he meant--"

Jason shot him a glare, "ever learn how to mind your fucking business, Byers?"

When I'm losing control, will you turn me away?

"We're not trying to cause trouble, you're drunk Jason--"

Or touch me deep inside?

"You're right, I am, ya know it's really great too, you should try it. Maybe a drink would help you
relax." Jason let a breath out onto his face, and Will turned to the side trying not to gag, "oh you
don't like it do you? Heard that from a little birdy. Scared of a little drink? Or are scared to see what
you'll act like, what's your deal?"

Before Jason could take another step, a hand pushed him back, "ya know, if you wanted to kiss
him I'm sure you could have just said that, your attempt at flirting is really humiliating."

A round of surprised gasps and laughs moved around the room, causing Jason's eye to twitch, "oh
you want attention again Wheeler? Well I can make that fucking happen you piece of shit--"

But if we get much closer, I could lose control

Jason started marching forward, a fire in his eyes. Will should have put even the smallest amount
of thought into his next move. He wasn't one to work on impulse, not usually, but Michael Wheeler
seemed to be breaking him down day by day.

Before Jason could grab Mike and probably make sure the singer had a broken nose, Will
practically kicked Mike behind him as his fist flew up without a thought.
And if your heart surrenders, you'll need me to hold

Knocking Jason right in the mouth.

"Ow, ow, didn't like that, I did not like that," he muttered quickly under his breath, shaking out his
aching hand. "Holy shit--"

"We've gotta go," His arm was being gripped and Will stumbled as he was yanked back, "now, we
need to go now."

Will's brain finally sped up and looked forward, seeing Jason's seething expression, nose dripping
with blood.

We are young

"You're dead! You're both fucking dead!"

He slid his hand into Mike's as they tried to run through the crowd.

Heartache to heartache, we stand

"Sorry, sorry, I'm sorry--"

"Will just come on!"

"I don't want to hit anyone!"

Mike snorted, "how ironic--"

"Shut up."

No promises, no demands

Their hands stuck together, gluing themselves into place as if they'd found their rightful spot. Mike
was guiding them, which was already a terrible idea, and with every step he could practically feel
Jason getting closer.

"Come on!" He yelled over the loud music, taking charge and yanking Mike up the stairs.

"You're both fucking shits, you know that!"

Love is a battlefield

"His insults are lacking," Mike grumbled out, a hint of amusement in his tone. Will would forever
deny the smile that cracked on his face.

At the end of the hall, Will threw open a door and hurried inside, closing it behind them and
locking the handle.

"Okay well I don't think that was--"

Will lifted his unbruised hand and held it against Mike's mouth, having the elder boy pressed
against the door as quickened footsteps ran by. He waited a moment, stare casted right past Mike's
head as he attempted to listen for anyone walking up.

It would have been a smart idea to remove his hand and step back before looking up at Mike.
Unfortunately, that was not how things unfolded. Without thinking, Will moved his focus and
found the elder teen already gazing down at him, pupils blown and eyes lidded. Will froze for a
moment, lips parting as he found himself growing warm from the unhidden attention he was
receiving.

It was like Mike was helpless, not moving to take the hand away from his mouth, just standing
there and following Will's every little move with his unrelenting stare. He darted between Mike's
eyes, heart racing as he tried to understand what was happening. At this point, Will felt like he
knew the other boy pretty well, he was snappy and sharp, always wanting to be in charge and
throw everyone around. He liked things his way and his way only.

So, to have Mike leaned back against the door unmoving, limbs relaxed, and staring at Will for
some kind of permission was new. Or it should have been new, but he was unwilling to admit that
stare had come on many times before.

"Sorry," he said, sliding his hand away and taking an awkward step back. "Didn't mean to...do
that."

Mike didn't move, "You can do whatever you want."

He snapped his head up, searching Mike's eyes one more time. Then it hit him, "you're drunk."

"Wouldn't say I'm drunk."

"You're acting drunk."

"I'm not." Will sent him an unamused stare, "fine, I'm a little drunk."

"What did you even do down there?"

Mike crossed his arms, "well, it wasn't my fault--"

"Bullshit."

There was a pause.

"He was being an ass."

Will rolled his eyes, "doesn't mean you should throw a drink in his face--"

"If he's gonna say shit about..." Mike trailed off, moving his gaze to the floor.

"About what?"

"Doesn't matter, nothing."

He bit at the inside of his cheek, deciding it was better not to push the conversation. Will glanced
around the room, realizing they had walked into some kind of office space. How regal.

"So...not the first time we've been locked in a room, right?" Mike said, clearing his throat more
times than necessary.

"What--"

"I mean because we--"

They spoke at the same time, making the already tense conversation significantly worse. Will was
glad the light in the room was dim, because if it wasn't, Mike would definitely be able to see his
scorching red cheeks.

"I uh, well because of...ya know the closet? When Robin and Vickie..."

Will crossed his arms, holding them close, "oh! Oh right, yeah I remember that...did you ever tell
them about it?"

"God no, that would be humiliating."

"Right, yeah that would-- yeah." Will couldn't meet the elder boy's eye, not trusting his voice to
stay steady if he did. They had so much to talk about yet nothing at all. There was no way to
approach that in a laid back way. "He's probably gone or over it we could just--"
"Will."

There was a pleading in Mike's tone that made him stop. Even if he wanted to keep pushing, to get
out of that room and never look back, he was utterly helpless. With a melting shield, he glanced to
the curly-headed singer, his heart moving in an addictive way.

"I'm sorry," he breathed out, not liking the pain shining in Mike's eyes, "I'm sorry, I just-- I don't
know what to..."

"You're still my friend," Mike whispered, "I don't want to lose you because we did something
stupid."

Stupid. Will would hate that word until his dying breath. He used it for many things, felt it every
second of his day. He was stupid, his life was stupid, everything was stupid. Mike would never
have any relation to that dreadful word.

"Yeah, yeah, no I know, it's not--" he tried to swallow the words down, "yeah."

"Well you just said a lot of nothing, so thank you for that, really it did me so much--"

"Shut up," he muttered, "I thought you were drinking with Jane?"

"I did that, then I got...side-tracked."

Will raised a brow, "are you going to tell me what you actually did or not?"

"Nope," Mike said, sending him a cheeky grin.

He returned the smile, not being able to help himself. Something about Mike was so contagious, he
was an irritating, spontaneous, and loud-mouthed smart ass, but all of that wrapped into one person
could never be anything but perfect.
"I missed you," Mike continued, his voice now soft and coming out with a barely audible breath.
Will knew there wasn't much to those words, but something about them made him want to cry.

"You did?"

"Of course, you're my..." The elder boy looked off to the side, "friend."

Will was quiet for a moment, but without a word he walked forward and leaned on the wall next to
the other boy. His heart was racing, but the odd distance between them was sending a strain
through his chest.

"Why do people--" Mike cut himself off.

"Hm?" He asked, glancing up at the elder teen.

Mike shook his head, "no, don't worry about it."

"What is it?"

"Will--"

"Just ask me."

Mike sighed, "why do people mess with you about the drinking thing?"

He now regretted not just letting it go. It wasn't a question he had been expecting, but when it came
to Mike he should be used to the surprise.

"Oh."

"You don't have to answer--"

"My dad was an alcoholic," he rushed out, knowing he'd lose the nerve if he waited any longer.
Will pressed his eyes shut, trying not to feel embarrassed about the fact. "He-- it's not a big deal, he
just didn't know how to control himself when he was drunk, so now I'm just...I don't know, I'm
worried that if I do drink I'll be just like him and I don't want to hurt-- it doesn't matter, I just try to
stay away from it."

"I could take him on."

Will let out a surprised laugh and turned to the boy, "what?"

"I could take him," Mike said, face pulled into a serious line. He was nodding slowly as if that was
actually feasible.

"You're ridiculous."

"I could do it, don't doubt me Byers," Mike turned to look at him, "I've got the enthusiasm."

His smile grew, "Jane said the exact same thing, you know that?"

"We're like twins." Mike's smile was bright and proud, eyes crinkling with joy. He was beautiful.

"Guess so."

Mike leaned his head back against the door, "I like doing this with you."

"Doing what with me?"

"Hiding out in dark rooms."

Will let out a small laugh, "next time we hide in a dark room it needs to be more interesting."
"You don't think a closet and an unused office are interesting?"

He nudged their arms together, "the only thing we might find in here is someone's birth certificate."

"If I found your birth certificate I'd steal it and then frame it above my bed."

"You're such a creep," Will said, feeling the burning tension he's had in his chest for days dissipate.

"And then every night I'd pray to it, create a whole new religion. Then I could profit off of that,
make copies of your birth certificate and start selling them--"

"Someone would steal my identity--"

"Shush I'm not done, also no one would want it, anyways after I started making bank--"

Will cut him off, "we, you don't get to make money off of me and not split it."

"Fine, we can then take all of that money--"

"And go on vacation--"

"Start a church."

Will let out a belly laugh, head bumping against the wall, "I don't want to start a church, I want to
go to the beach."

"It's alright baby we can start our church on the beach," Mike cooed teasingly.

His stomach fluttered at the name, a smile still tugging on his face, "what kind of papers do you
have to sign to legally start a new religion?"

"This isn't a real religion, we're doing fraudulent activities, come on keep up."

"It would be easier to rob a bank."

Mike reached a hand up and pinched his cheek, "I'll rob a bank for you."

"Yeah?" He whispered, easy grin still playing on his lips. Being around Mike was probably the
most intoxication he'd ever get in his life. It was enough.

"I'll rob a bank and start our church. Unfortunately, part of this religion is human statue art."

He snorted, "what's that?"

"It means during our daily meetings--"

"Daily?"

Mike ignored him, "--you'll have to stand on this platform and pose while I give my speeches."

"No I don't want to do that," he whined.

The elder teen shrugged helplessly, "sorry, I don't make the rules."

Will laughed, listening as Mike gave up on fighting his own down. They sat there in the dim room,
not bothering to stifle their soft noise. It was free, a release Will didn't know he needed.

"I missed you too," Will said after a long string of silence.
Mike shifted and looked down at him, "yeah?"

"Yeah."

Their eyes locked together. That's when the silence truly came. Behind the locked door Will could
still hear music, though he couldn't make out the lyrics. Now being this close, the words Mike
never said aloud were easier to understand. The language wasn't completely foreign, just not quite
pieced together, a scrambled mess of letters that needed to be tied together.

In the dim light, the shadows cutting at Mike's face making him look sharp, almost untouchable.
Will saw past that, it reminded him of a bulldog, an animal that could be so kind, desperate for love
and attention only to have people terrified of it to the point they're just left alone. What a
heartbreaking reality.

"I remember the first night I saw you," Mike whispered, voice barely there. "You scared the shit
out of me."

Will swallowed thickly, "why?"

"Because I thought you were so beautiful, and I realized how right it felt to look at you and I hated
myself for it. I still do," Mike got out, pushing the words within one breath.

He pinched his brows together, wondering if his pain and guilt could be shown through the small
action. Will didn't move, watching as Mike's eyes kept on him, unwavering and fearful.

"If you were a girl it would be easier to feel like this."

Will pressed his eyes shut, "Mike--"

"But I know that if you were a girl I wouldn't want you. Not like this, n-not like..."

He wanted to scream at him, tell him to stop. Will knew that it would end in pain, that he would
ruin the angel sitting next to him. He bit at his bottom lip, trying to find the correct answer to give.
Will knew the right one, the one that wouldn't end up hurting anyone in the long run. He could
apologize, tell Mike there was nothing reciprocated and run. He needed to run, to hide.

With Mike's gleaming eyes on him, there was an impossibility with those easy outcomes. He could
never do it. Will was too selfish.

"Do you remember what you were singing?" He asked, voice trembling.

Mike nodded slowly, "yeah."

"I like that song."

The elder boy let out a short breath, eyes darting down to his lips. It wasn't a small motion, Will
followed the movement with a speeding heart, knowing he was utterly helpless at this point. Mike
brought a hand up and cupped the back of his neck, turning his head slightly to the right before
pressing their lips together.

A gasp got stuck in Will's throat as the feeling he's been trying to memorize for a week came back
clearly. His eyes fluttered shut, lashes brushing against Mike's cheeks. Their knees bumped
together, and Will couldn't even begin to care, the outside world becoming nothing but a memory
as Mike consumed him. Bringing a hesitant hand up, He rested it on Mike's cheek, feeling the soft
skin melt under his touch.

"I can't stop thinking about you," Mike choked out, their lips still ghosting together.

Will could only nod, twisting just enough to thread his other hand into Mike's hair, pulling him
back. Kissing Mike was something uniquely perfect, his lips were smooth, gliding right along his
own with a practice they didn't actually have. It was soft, gentle, and addicting; causing any
rational thought to slip from his mind. After a few minutes, they had to pull back. Will was trying
to catch his breath, hands slowly dropping and sliding down Mike's chest.

The elder boy caught them, making Will look back into his eyes.

"We--"
Mike cut him off, "if you say 'we can't' I'm going to lose my fucking mind."

"Tell anyone. We can't tell anyone," he said.

That seemed to be more of a relief than anything to Mike, "right, yeah I know. I'm not...I-I don't
even know-- yeah."

"It's just a kiss, it's okay."

Mike brought a hand up to his face, and Will couldn't help but press closer to the other boy. The
rings. They found their places on his skin and dug in, the cool metal burning right back to where
they belong. Mike held onto him as if he was going to run, gripping his cheek like it was the only
way he'd stay. Will was afraid there was a truth to that.

"You're gonna drive me crazy, you know that?" Mike whispered.

Will brought a hand up to hold Mike's arm, "you're shaking."

"Sorry, sorry I'm just...I'm sorry."

He cupped the back of Mike's head, slowly bringing the elder boy against his side and holding the
singer to his chest, running his fingers through the raven curls.

There was silence, one with millions of unspoken words. For a moment, things were just nothing,
and Will allowed himself to hold on, to deserve something he craved. To love. Closing his eyes, he
pulled Mike impossibly closer and kissed the top of his head.

His control was slipping, and every brick in the house would come right down with it.
 Chapter 23

7 years ago

"Michael stop moving--"

"Mom, just stop touching it, the gel makes it feel shitty."

"Watch your mouth."

He slumped down, crossing his arms and pouting in the mirror. It was an everyday ritual, one he
was beginning to have nightmares about.

"Can I get a tattoo?" He asked.

His mom rolled her eyes, "enough, you know you're never getting a tattoo."

"A kid in my math class has one."

"Well I'm not kids mother, am I?"

"What if he doesn't have a mom, mom?" Mike sent her a grin, "be more sensitive."

"You better not go around telling people I'm mom shaming, you understand?" She said, a smile
playing on her lips.

"Yes mother dear."

She patted his collar down, "alright up, we've got to get going or you'll be late."
Mike glanced at himself in the mirror again, dragging his fingers over his now stick straight hair. It
reminded him of a mushroom top. Not the best look to be carrying around. Grabbing his backpack,
he followed his mother out the front door.

"Say goodbye to your father."

He rolled his eyes, and peaked his head back through the door, "bye dad!"

"Michael! Don't forget about soccer try outs--"

"Still not doing that, bye!"

Before his dad was able to get another scolding word in, he rushed towards the car. It was an
ongoing battle, one that Mike would always win since even if he did bother trying out, he'd get cut
immediately.

"You know, you could just do it to make him happy."

He huffed, looking towards the backseat where Holly was, sending her a big smile. The blonde girl
let out a squealing laugh.

"Mom, it would be humiliating, and I have band practice anyway."

"Humiliating is a bit of a stretch, it's good to try new things."

Mike leaned his head against the window, "I don't want to play sports mom, it's not my groove."

"Oh my goodness, do not use the word groove, you sound like your grandmother."

He reached a hand back, letting Holly tug on his fingers, "you're just jealous I make it sound cool."
Mike counted each house as they drove by, trying to think of ways to get out of gym class. Every
Monday, Wednesday, and Friday he was forced to put one a bright yellow shirt and shorts that
were too big for him just to get hit in the head by dodgeballs. Apparently he had 'exceptionally bad
reflexes'. His dad was going to be proud of that one.

At least he was exceptional at something.

They stopped at a red light in front of the park, and Mike found his eyes zeroing in on the swing
set. There was only one kid there, the cold weather making it miserable to be outside. The kid was
short, doing his best to kick his legs. Mike felt frozen, unable to move as he tried to catch a
glimpse of the boy's face.

His hair was a bit greasy, needing a cut, but his eyes were still free. They were huge, even from
their distance Mike noticed the dulling wonder in them. He had on a long white shirt, a flannel, and
some red winter vest. Definitely not enough to keep warm.

"Hey mom?"

"Yeah honey?"

"Do you think that kid is okay?" He asked, not being able to look away from the window.

"Oh I'm sure he's okay, has a backpack with him."

Mike pressed his lips together, "he looks sad."

"Michael, I'm sure he's alright. If he's still here after I drop you off, I'll check on him okay?"

"What if he gets hurt mom? Maybe we should stop--"

The light changed, and he wasn't able to make a rash decision as they drove off. Before they were
out of sight, the boy looked up and Mike finally got a very short glimpse of his face.
Green eyes.

"Alright, I'll pick you up after practice okay?"

Mike kissed her cheek, "just tell dad I tried out."

She rolled her eyes, "alright, now go."

"Bye mom!"

He hiked his backpack up and started walking towards the school, attempting to maneuver around
the other kids that weren't paying him any mind. Making his way through the main doors was
always hellish, the smell of prepubescent teen wafting into his nose. Mike kept his head down,
hoping to get to his locker without any trouble.

"Hey Wheeler!"

Apparently it would not bee his lucky day, maybe next week.

He sighed, turning to Troy. The taller boy had a teasing smirk on, already winded up for the day.

"What do you want?" He breathed out with irritation.

"Oh, just wanted to hear about your weekend of course."

Mike tightened his straps, "leave me alone--"

He wasn't able to walk very far before he was being pushed into a locker, knocking his stiff hair
against it. Laughter spilled around the hallway, making his cheeks flush.

"Oh you gonna cry Wheeler?"

Mike harshly wiped his eyes, "shut up--"

"Look he's crying!"

The laughter was deafening, leaving him wanting to curl into a ball and hide for the rest of eternity.
All he could do was stand there, watch as he was made into a humiliation. Nothing but a toy to
kick around.

"Why don't you go crying to your boyfriend? Maybe get you a nice boy in a tutu, would you like
that?" Troy mocked, walking closer, pushing his chest.

Mike glanced towards the ground, blinking quickly so no new tears came.

"No girls would ever want to kiss you, they don't want your little gay disease-- ah!"

He stumbled back in shock as the other boy tripped as a shoe came out of nowhere and knocked
him onto his butt. This time the laughter was directed elsewhere. While everyone else seemed
distracted, Mike shot his head to the side, barely catching sight of the bright red vest for the second
time that day. Green eyes, if only he could see them closer.

Mike never saw the boy again.

-----------

It was difficult not to wonder how people perceived him. Mike liked to act like it didn't matter, as
if he lived freely, the chains cut from his wrists. It was all a lie, a mask someone had glued onto his
face. He was weak, unable to see past the eyes on him, the ones that probably never gave him the
thought of day.

Nothing mattered. It didn't change that he couldn't look at himself without feeling shame. On good
nights, he was sure nothing was wrong. There was no way loving Will, wanting him, could ever be
wrong. Those thoughts always helped. Thinking about Will, his eyes, the way his smile curved,
how his skin had a warm tint to it. How weirdly strong he was for his small frame. There was a
beauty to him Mike was sure someone crafted in a lab, it could never be wrong to love Will Byers.
When he took Will away, the pain came. It had been conditioned into his brain that something
wasn't quite right about him, he knew that and tried to hide from it. Now he couldn't, he hated that
they had all been right. His parents were right to run from him, to take his sisters and leave him in
the dark, banging on the locked door for help. Everyone always left, and he hated himself for
knowing they had a reason to.

Will was his key, he let the door crack open, the decaying wood finally gone. He could almost see
the freedom from the outside. Now he just needed to be kicked into motion.

"Mike! Get out of the bathroom!"

He jolted, realizing his thoughts had wandered. Running another hand through his hair, he walked
back into the garage.

"Wow, you look exactly the same," Max said, popping a piece of gum into her mouth.

Robin snorted, "maybe he was taking a shit, Eddie go--"

"Ew, I wasn't shitting, I was just...fixing my hair."

"You didn't do a very good job."

Mike pinched his nose in irritation, "you look like that hot character from that old Christmas
movie."

"Wow, didn't expect that--"

He snapped his fingers, "oh heat mizer! The ugly think with fire on his head? You guys are
basically-- ow!"

Max threw a plastic water bottle at his head, "you're a little shit, at least I'm not ten feet--"
"Where are you even going Mike?" Eddie cut in, obviously bored of their snappy conversation.

His cheeks went pink, "oh uh, going over to the Byers'."

"How fun," Max drawled out, a teasing smile on her face.

Mike felt his stomach drop, fear bubbling inside of him. He looked at her with slightly widened
eyes.

"W-What?" He got out, coughing to try and cover up the break in his voice.

"Nothing, nothing. Have fun, tell Jane I say hi."

He pressed his brows together, "oh uh, okay no problem."

She didn't know. Of course she didn't. He glanced over at Robin who seemed just as giddy, looking
towards Max with a smile.

"Am I missing something?" He asked, not knowing if he wanted the answer.

Eddie snorted out a laugh, "oh you are something Wheeler."

Mike stood there, looking around at his friends and trying to piece it all together. His heart was
racing, feeling mocked and utterly naked in front of them. He moved his eyes over each of them,
their laughter now seeming louder.

"Why are you guys laughing?" He asked softly, cursing himself for how quiet his voice came out.

Max dramatically wiped her eyes, "don't worry about it Mike, go have fun-- are you okay?"

He took a step back, balling his trembling hands into a fist, "y-yeah, yeah I'm fine."
"Mike--"

Taking his keys, he turned his back to them and made his way towards the door, "gotta go, see you
tomorrow."

Before they could stop him, he left the garage and was hit by the autumn air. The door clicked
shut. Mike felt his face fall once he was alone, the beating terror rushing through his heart.

They couldn't know, Mike's been quiet about it. Will wouldn't say anything, he trusted him. It was
nothing, they didn't know. Everything was fine.

He got in the car, grateful he had gone against the motorcycle that morning. Robin had texted him
saying she 'felt like rain' he knew she didn't have that kind of intuition, but always ended up
listening anyway.

It was dark out, the sun setting quicker with each day. Mike's mind ran as he tried to focus on the
road, his friends teased him all the time, it usually meant nothing. Now he felt vulnerable, ripped
open involuntarily. He felt they must have known something, every possibility imaginable came to
him. He and Will had always been discreet, no one ever knew they were friends until they
explicitly stated it. They didn't know, nobody did.

The Byers house was comfortable, hiding away in the woods and away from peering eyes. Flicking
at the front door was the porch light, a warm greeting that most people would find unsettling.

Hurrying to the front door, he knocked.

"Mike!" Miss Byers' smiling face came into view.

"Miss Byers!" He said back with the same amount of enthusiasm, pulling the woman into a tight
hug.

She let out a joyful laugh, "you're a sweetheart. Jane's not here, but Will's in his room, you can go
ahead."
He pressed a kiss to her cheek before tugging his shoes off and making his way through the
hallway. Something about the house felt like Christmas, even though it wasn't quite that time of
year. There was an ease to the place that Mike would forever be jealous of.

Will's door was cracked open and he peeked inside, not being able to help himself. Will was sitting
on the ground, hunched over with a pencil and sketchpad. Unlike usually, his shoulders weren't
tense. His eyes were focused, unmoving and relaxed. It was rare for anyone to see Will without a
pile of stress on his back.

He knocked, gently pushing the door open. Will looked up slowly, a smile cracking on his face.
Mike would have melted inside if he didn't have to keep himself alive, he'd tape his eyes open if it
meant he could stare at Will forever.

"What are you drawing?" He asked, closing the door behind himself.

"Nothing," Will said, closing up the book.

Mike threw himself down on the younger teen's bed, "come on let me see, was it a self portrait?"

"If it was I definitely wouldn't let you see." Will leaned back against the wall and Mike rolled onto
his side, giving himself a better view of the boy.

Will was wrapped up in a sweatshirt, sleeves falling past his hands. Mike figured out awhile back
that he wasn't a fan of the cold.

"Everything okay?" Will asked.

"Hm?" He hummed out, following Will's every twitch.

The boy smiled, "are you okay?"

"Yeah I'm fine, are you okay?"

Will huffed out a laugh, "yes, we need to get started by the way, we still have to finish the painting
for homecoming--"

Letting out a long groan, Mike rolled onto his back, "I can't do that anymore, I'm going insane."

"All you do is sit there and watch me do it--"

He threw a hand over his face, "it's so hard, Will, I-I cannot put myself through that physical strain
any farther, I do believe my heart may lose every ounce of blood and life it once held so strongly."

Mike popped an eye open, trying to see if he was getting any reaction out of the green-eyed teen.
Will's face was split into a reluctant smile.

"Look at that smile," he breathed out, captivated by the sight.

Will dipped his head, "you're embarrassing me."

"Embarrassing you in front of what? Your self portrait--"

"No--"

Mike shot up with a grin, "so it is a self portrait?"

"What? No, I was not doing a self portrait."

"You don't have to be ashamed, if I could draw I'd draw you too."

He felt pride wash over him as Will's face went beet red. It wasn't hard to get that look out of the
other boy, but no matter how many times it happened, Mike always felt proud of himself for it.
"How was practice?" Will asked after a moment of them staring.

Mike felt his mood sober, "oh, it was fine."

"Just fine?" Will asked, raising a brow.

"It was good."

Will stood up, making it clear that he didn't believe a word of that. Mike's eyes followed the
smaller boy as he walked closer, towering over him before sitting down on the bed.

"What happened?"

He shrugged, "nothing really just...did you happen to, I don't know, tell anyone about...what we
did? Or are doing? Or--"

"Mike, I didn't tell anyone anything, why?" Will said, his tone firm.

"It's nothing."

After a stringing moment, Will brought a hand up to brush away his curls, "what's going on?"

Mike scooted closer, relieved as Will didn't try and move away. The silence was comfortable, a
warm hum that connected them in the tiny home. Will's eyes were wide with a dull wonder,
waiting for some kind of answer.

"I said I was coming over here and...it's stupid--"

"Talk to me," Will whispered, crossing his legs on the bed.

"They were laughing and stuff, thought they were making fun of me." Will's face fell and Mike
wanted to smack himself for it, "it's okay! I'm not saying its your fault, they don't know so it must
be about something else, it's nothing."

"It's not nothing if you're upset." Mike took Will's hand and tugged him impossibly closer, not
caring as the younger boy scrambled to keep himself from falling off the bed.

"It started when I was seven," he said, holding the boy tight to his chest, gently tapping Will's
head. There was a tension in his chest, the need to move and hold onto something, and the best
possible option was sitting right in front of him.

Will snorted out a laugh, voice muffled, "okay."

"I used to dress like a little bitch. Well, my mom dressed me, so it wasn't really my fault. She was
going through her 'bright polos' phase that lasted through my childhood. I'd go to school like that,
didn't have a choice," he paused, resting his chin on Will's head, "got horrendously bullied, really it
was kind of poetic, they'd slam my head into lockers--"

"That makes sense, kind of like the 'dropped as a baby' thing" Will said to himself, his voice so
quiet Mike barely heard him, "oh my god...I'm so sorry--"

Mike let out a sharp laugh, not being able to help the bright amusement bubbling inside of him. He
released his tight hold, allowing Will to lift his head up. Mike kept his arms wrapped around the
boy's shoulders. Sometimes, rarely, but sometimes Will held a glowing light, and that was the only
time Mike preferred sun to the shadows.

"I didn't mean to be mean," Will said, eyes wide with guilt.

"It's okay," he whispered, knowing he'd be embarrassed if anyone saw his unhidden yearning
expression.

"No, it's not okay, you shouldn't have your head slammed into lockers, I'm sorry," Will continued
to apologize. "I didn't mean it."

"Will, it's alright, I know," he shrugged, "it wasn't the bad part. I didn't have any friends before
meeting Eddie, so Troy and some other kids had fun laughing at me. My clothes, my hair, anything
they could pick out. Called me a..."
"A what?"

"Doesn't matter. I'm used to being laughed at, don't care that much, but when they were doing it...I
don't know, felt like I was ten again."

"Just cause you're used to something doesn't make it okay," Will said.

Mike's brows slowly pinched together, "yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Well I'll make sure to keep that in mind Mr. Byers. Now are we going to watch a movie?"

Will grinned, "we're supposed to be working on our project--"

Mike groaned and fell back on the bed for the second time, trying to figure out how loud he had to
be to drown out Will's voice.

"Stop doing that, come on it won't take too long."

"Okay, what if we...don't do that, and finish it Monday?"

"You have to promise you'll actually do it."

Mike through a hand over his heart, "scouts honor."

"You're so full of shit." Will stood up from the bed, "come on, I'm picking out the movie."

With a free smile, Mike followed after the younger boy, feeling truly content for the first time in
years. The laughing didn't matter, none of it did, because Will was right there. No matter what he
would always feel right.
 Chapter 24

His tunnel kept getting deeper, growing into an underground maze. Will was lost in it, knowing
there was no out that wouldn't leave him beaten and bruised.

"Do you think this will be cute though?"

"I--"

"It's not great, but mom said I could borrow her earrings and I think that'll make it come together,
right?"

Will bit down on his cheek, "uh yeah, yeah it'll look great."

"He doesn't really seem to notice stuff like that...I don't know, that's probably a good thing." Jane
sat next to him, her posture slumped.

He needed to say something, he'd tried, but the words were so lost something wrong always came
out.

"Max told me."

Will looked down at her in confusion, "what?"

"About what you and Mike talked about, I just wanted to thank you. I know I can be annoying and
I keep coming to you for this stuff, but knowing that I'm not crazy and he does actually have
feelings for me helps. She didn't say anything to Mike, so don't worry about that, but I appreciate
it."

He was going to throw up.

"Jane..." he trailed off, screaming at himself to get it out, to try and cut through the strings he had
tied around his neck. She looked up at him. Waiting, putting her complete trust in his words.
"I...you're welcome."

Her face split into a smile, "looks like you're learning how to take compliments, how great is that?"

"That wasn't really a compliment."

She had no idea.

"I think it was. One of my best actually--"

Jane was interrupted by a car horn sounding outside. Homecoming was next weekend and Steve
thought it was a good idea for them all to celebrate together. So, he and Eddie had planned a small
house party.

"God, does he have to hit it like that," Jane muttered, a look of adoration gracing her features.

Since Will's car was having trouble, Mike had offered to come pick them up. Which was already a
bad idea for a multitude of reasons. One of them being that the elder boy was a terrible driver. The
other reasons were ones he was desperately trying to keep to himself.

"We have neighbors you know," Will said as they walked outside, seeing Mike's smiling face
hanging out the window. The carefree and simply catching look almost made him want to cry, he
knew Mike wouldn’t always look at him like that. So, for a moment, he returned it, feeling struck
by the curly-headed boy.

"No you don't, you practically live in the woods."

Will slid into the back seat and Jane took the passengers spot. In the rear view mirror, Mike sent
him a confused look, but he did his best to ignore it. Will kept digging farther down towards the
earth's core and would most likely burn there.

A fate that he couldn't deserve more.

"Shut up, there is no way you did well on that test."

"I did! I told you to study--"

"Yeah and I did, and the test was still bullshit so--"

"Mike, that was a stop sign," Jane laughed.

Will sat quietly, listening to their easy conversation. He felt sick, watching the ease of it all. Guilt
hit him when he realized he'd do anything to force Mike's feelings in Jane's direction, even if it
would crush his heart. He knew how to be quiet and put a smile on his face. He didn't know how to
deal with the situation at hand and it was beginning to show. Hiding in the back, invisible, was a
character he’d trained for. Now he was in the center, the audience waiting for him to crash and
destroy the story.

"--Will?"

He snapped his eyes up, "huh?"

Jane turned, "you okay?"

Both she and Mike were glancing back at him with wide and innocent eyes, looking like two
oblivious puppies. All he could see was two of the most important people in his life and how he
was stabbing them repeatedly.

“Fine, sorry,” he said, trying to send them both a smile.

It didn’t seem like either of them believed him, not even for a moment.

“If you don’t feel good we can go home,” Jane said, putting him first even though he knew how
excited she was for this.

“No, I’m really okay, just distracted…the trees.” He prayed they’d take the excuse.
Jane nodded, slowly turning around again. Mike continued to glance at him through the mirror, and
Will was able to force a smile on his face to relieve the other boy.

“If you ever need a therapy session, Jane and I are wonderful at that. Aren’t we?” Mike said,
sending the girl a friendly smile, giving her a short high-five.

She blushed, “yep, we practiced on Robin last week when she got into a fight with Vickie.”

“What happened this time?” Will asked, trying to derail the conversation.

Mike shrugged, “something about…I think they were disagreeing about some restaurant? Robin
got mean about it and she’s too stubborn to just apologize. Once we convinced her to she went
crawling right back."

They turned into Steve’s driveway, which was abnormally large. Will had never really liked the
blond’s house, it was too modern, large windows in the most uncomfortable places. His parents had
it remodeled freshman year.

“Shit, this place is huge,” Mike said in awe as they stepped out of the car. Will took the keys as the
elder boy thrusted them in his direction.

“What do you want me to do with these?” He asked, fighting the urge to lean up and kiss Mike’s
cheeky smile.

“I don’t wanna hold them, can you?”

Will was useless at that point, “you planning on drinking?”

“Not a lot, but can you drive on the way back?” Mike said softly as they came up to the door, Jane
ignoring their short conversation.

He nodded, “of course.”

“Hello!” Robin sang with a grin as she opened the door, motioning them into the house, “Steve set
everything up in the basement, you’re the last one’s here.”

Will stepped in last, watching as Robin wrapped an arm over Jane’s shoulder and dragged her
downstairs. When the two girls were out of sight, Will felt a hand on his.

“What is it?” He asked, stopping and turning to look up at Mike. The taller boy had a lazy grin, his
eyes open and filled with warmth. Will felt that twinging pain in his chest. He didn’t deserve to get
that look.

“I missed you,” Mike said quietly, reaching up to pinch his chin.

Will couldn’t help but smile, “yeah?”

“Hm, are you sure you’re okay?” Mike pulled him closer, pressing a kiss to his forehead.

“I’m fine, promise.” Will tried not to cry, knowing he needed everything to stop before it blew up
in his face. Mike was a luxury he could never deserve.

“You can talk to me, you know that right?” Mike brushed a finger under his eye, catching the
invisible tears.

“I know, nothing is wrong I swear.”

Mike nodded, “alright, I trust you.”

That hurt.

“We should probably go,” Will said, sending Mike a rushed smile.

“Okay–”
He didn’t give the boy a second to finish before swiftly turning and walking down the stairs, trying
to get his heart rate to cool down.

The basement was set up with a bunch of drinks, randomly collected cups, and blankets covering
the three couches. It was significantly cozier than the rest of Steve’s house. Lucas and Max were
sitting in one corner, Dustin on the ground in front of them. Robin was with Vickie, her arm
wrapped around the girl. Eddie, Chrissy, and Steve were making drinks, Jane talking with them.

“Hey guys!” Steve said as Mike popped into sight.

“Hi.” Will sent a wave around before plopping down on the unused couch.

“Did Mike almost kill you guys?” Max asked with a smirk.

Mike scoffed, sitting next to him. Way too close. Luckily for Will, that wasn’t something odd for
the elder boy. He was like a perfect little leech.

“Very funny, I’m a fantastic driver–”

“He ran through two stop signs!” Jane yelled over, a drink in hand.

“That’s not true,” Mike scoffed, crossing his arms. “Will back me up.”

“He drove perfectly.”

Mike smiled brightly, “see? Perfectly.”

“Not fair, Will just agrees with everything you say,” Robin cut in, fumbling around to try and grab
the TV remote.

“That’s not true. Right Will?”

He grinned, “not true at all.”

“Told you.” Mike kicked his feet up, tangling his legs on Will’s lap. No one even blinked an eye.
Will kind of wished someone would, it might make his execution come quicker.

“You’re both full of shit,” Eddie said, walking over and jumping down next to Vickie.

“Are we watching a movie?” Lucas asked after a moment, all of them watching as Robin aimlessly
scrolled through channels.

“If I can find one.”

Jane and Chrissy sat down next to Mike, all of them squeezing in as Steve went onto the ground. It
was crowded, all of them trying to find space; but Will couldn’t help but feel as if he was wrapped
in a big blanket, usually he was haunted with such a lonely feeling, one he deserved, but in that
short moment it disappeared. Mike was messing with his fingers while turning to whisper with
Jane, leaving Will to wish he was in a different situation. One where he could enjoy the small
things.

A reality where he didn’t ruin everything he touched.

“Play that one!” Mike yelled, pointing to the TV.

Will flinched, “ow, don’t yell in my ear.”

“Sorry,” Mike said with a loopy smile, gently patting the side of his face. “Can’t ruin your ears
then you wouldn’t be able to hear me serenade you.”

Will glanced around nervously, “you serenade everyone, I’m not special.”

Mike brought a hand up, cupping his mouth towards Will’s ear, “you’re so spec ial.”
He flushed, looking at the TV, “uh, thanks.”

Will pressed his eyes shut for a moment when he felt Mike reel back slightly, his dry response
obviously hurtful. He wanted to take it back, look at the other boy and cradle him, tell Mike how
deeply he wanted and cared for him.

He couldn’t, not now, maybe not ever.

The movie continued and even though Will was barely paying attention, his eyes stayed glued on
the screen. Throughout the first hour, Mike continued to slowly move away from his tense body,
making Will’s heart squeeze tightly.

“I’m gonna use the bathroom,” Mike said, his voice meek and reserved.

“You okay?” Dustin asked, noticing the shift.

“Yeah, fine.”

Will heard every creek of the staircase, still frozen as Mike disappeared up the stairs. It was a few
moments of silence before Will cracked, not being able to hold out.

“I’ll go check on him,” he said, everyone seemed to already have expected that.

Will walked upstairs, closing the door behind himself. The house was quiet. Unmoving. He
glanced around, trying to find where Mike might have gone. He opened the door and looked to the
side. There wasn’t any sign of a person, but he saw smoke.

Either the house was on fire or Mike was making bad health choices. Will held his sweatshirt close
and turned the corner.

Mike was a sight. One that caused his breath to get stuck, something was so ethereal. The raven-
haired boy had his curls all over the place, flannel falling off his shoulder, earrings gleaming in the
light as he took long drags from the cigarette.
Dried tear tracks made him look like a heartbreaking painting, a story behind it that no one would
ever know.

“That’s not good for you,” he said softly, causing Mike to jump.

The boy noticed him, and slumped back, quickly swiping his eyes. That caused a twist in Will’s
chest. He stepped closer, wanting to spit out apologies.

“Yeah well, I don’t do it often,” Mike muttered, putting it out.

Will nodded, “only saw you do it once.”

“I know.”

“What?”

Mike crossed his arms, “you think I didn’t see you that day?”

Wind brushed over them, causing Will to shiver. Mike’s eyes were sharp, staring at him as if the
question held pounds of weight. He didn’t know what to do with it, never really did. Crossing his
arms, he took a tentative step closer.

“Well, I like to think you didn’t. I’m not really…didn’t think about what I was doing,” he said,
sending Mike a tiny smile.

The elder boy looked to the floor, “right.”

He cleared his throat, “did you use the bathroom?”

“Uh yeah, just needed a longer break.”

Will nodded, walking closer until he was standing right in front of Mike. He didn’t know what to
say, what he needed to do was walk away and stop hurting everyone; but he was selfish.

“It’s bad to smoke.”

Mike sighed, “yeah I know, you said–”

“But you do look really pretty when you do it, so I guess I’m kind of conflicted.”

The taller boy slowly looked down at him, “do you actually like me?”

“What?” He asked, taken back by the question.

Mike turned to him fully, “do you actually like me or do I just look stupid? Because I really can’t
tell and I just feel like I’m throwing myself at you and you don’t really…”

He would have rather been slapped than hear that.

“No.”

Mike’s face fell, “o-oh, okay–”

“Wait no! No that’s not– No–” he took a short breath, “that’s not what I meant I just, I didn’t mean
to make you feel like that.”

“Can you just stop speaking in riddles? Because I feel like I’m just making it up in my head but I
know I’m not, it’s like you recoil from me whenever I walk near you. I-If it makes you
uncomfortable or something that’s fine, just say that so I stop making myself look like an idiot
because you’re impossible to read–”

“Mike–”
He was ignored, “--and it’s just driving me insane because I really like you, and if you don’t feel
like that about me then just tell me.”

“Mike, can–”

“I’m just making this worse.” Mike’s voice cracked as he blinked quickly. Will’s brows flinched
together as if he’d been cut open.

He stepped forward, cupping Mike’s face, “hey, don’t cry, I’m sorry please don’t cry.”

“I’m f-fine.”

Will wiped the pad of his thumb under the other boy’s eye, “I’m sorry.”

“Can you just kiss me?” Mike asked, pressing their foreheads together, “please?”

He couldn’t fight the plea and wrapped his arms around Mike’s neck, pulling him closer. Their lips
came together with a sense of perfection, the magnets inside of both of them eagerly locking into
place. For a moment, Mike was his and he could hold onto him. Will pulled the boy closer, being
able to feel the remnants of smoke against the elder teen’s mouth.

Mike ran a hand down his waist, twisting his head to the left, pulling Will impossibly close. It was
intoxicating, making Will forget about every mistake he’s made. Unf ortunately, it also made his
ears stop working.

“Hey, are you guys over– what…”

With terror, Will pulled back, their lips making a smacking sound as they pulled apart. He looked
to the side, seeing Max standing there with her eyes bulging out, pure shock written on her face.

“Uh, hey Max–”

“What the fuck? When did– how– what the actual hell?” She rushed out, seeming flustered and
completely lost.

Mike only seemed slightly worried, but Will was utterly terrified. She was the last person he
wanted to find out.

“Max, please don’t tell anyone,” Mike pleaded.

She blinked rapidly, “what are you even– what about J–”

“Max, can you just not say anything?” He breathed out, feeling sick as Jane’s name began to slip
out.

The redhead glanced over at Mike, and Will saw her eyes working. She was smart, and finally
noticed the cracks in his lie. Mike’s innocent expression spoke volumes. No matter how many
times Mike said he was a good liar, he could never do that about important things. He wasn’t a
monster. It was clear the Mike Wheeler that Max had known for years wasn’t behind this
‘scheme’.

The break was formed and could only tear apart from there.

When her eyes came back to him, Will had to look away. There was a look of betrayal and disgust
in her stare. He wanted to throw up.

“Mike, can I just talk to Will for a second?”

The taller boy looked confused, “what?”

“Got to give him the shovel talk, did it for Robin, now it’s your turn,” her voice was soft when she
spoke to him, a little grin on her face.

“Okay, but don’t scare him.”

Will pressed his eyes shut as Mike kissed his cheek and walked off, obviously filled with relief. A
feeling Will would never have the luxury of knowing. When the front door shut, Max’s kind
expression broke.

“Wow.”

“Max–”

“Wow , never expected this from you, but maybe I should have, apparently I don’t know you at
all,” she said, crossing her arms. “So how was that ‘talk’ you had with Mike two weeks ago? Since
he’s so in love with Jane, it must have been a pretty intense one.”

“Can you please just–”

“Oh, and you’re just the most supportive brother aren’t you? Just looking out for your little sister.”

He looked at her seething face, “I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, that’s not gonna cut it. Is everything you said a fucking lie?”

“Max–”

“No, this isn’t a conversation, give me a yes or no answer. Did you lie to me about everything
Mike said? And to Jane?”

Will nodded, “yes.”

“And you I bet you didn’t have the fucking decency to tell him that did you? Now he looks like an
asshole because you just made shit up. How long have you known that Mike wasn’t interested in
Jane?”

He held his arms close, “since the second night of the camping trip.”
“You’re fucking with me right?” Max paused, “and then you just kept going , you kept leading her
on about it, how fucking crappy of a person do you have to be to do that? And you know Mike is
oblivious, especially since he’s so infatuated with you . He obviously doesn’t know she’s
practically in love with him, and why, god why wouldn’t you fucking say anything?”

“I don’t know.”

“You don’t know? Are you fucking kidding me? Everyone thinks they’re going to get together, shit
Dustin thinks that they’re already together, what do you think is going to happen when they
mention that in front of Mike? He’s not a fucking idiot, don’t treat him like one. He’s going to say
something.”

Will shuffled his feet, trying to find the right words, “I just– I don’t know, I was trying to do what
was best for everyone–”

She laughed humorlessly, “no, you were trying to do what was best for you. You don’t fucking
care about anyone else, that’s clear to me now. Jane is practically a lovesick puppy for the guy you
were out here kissing, and you’re just okay with knowing you’re embarrassing her? Letting her
pine after Mike? He’s obviously not interested and you just kept pushing them towards each other.
The only person you’re ‘helping’ is yourself, you don’t care about them.”

“N-No, no that’s not true, I’m just– I don’t know what to do, I panicked.”

Max didn’t look at him, “you tell them the truth, that’s what you do. Mike isn’t something you get
to just kick around, god you even treat him like shit, I bet you were the reason he was sobbing that
morning weren’t you? Robin told me it was about his Mom but I knew that was bullshit– god, who
even are you?”

Will stared blankly at the floor, part of him loved the confirmation that he was worth nothing. She
was right, he was a monster. The same scumbag that helped raise him.

“I never wanted to hurt anyone.”

Max scoffed, “I don’t believe you. Doubt I’ll believe any shit you say again. You need to tell them,
they both obviously love you and you’re dragging them through the mud.”
“They’re going to hate me,” he whispered, accepting that fact and speaking it to himself.

She nodded, “yeah, good. Mike has been ignored and pushed around his entire life, people making
decisions for him that tear him apart, I’m not going to let you do that too. Someone like you isn’t
going to be the one that breaks him, I won’t let you.”

Someone like you.

“I’ll tell them. I’m sorry,” he said softly, realizing the loyal friendship he’d started to gain from
Max was shattered in a matter of seconds, leaving him hollow on the inside.

“If you don’t I will.” She pressed her lips together, eyes flaking with tears, “you’re a piece of shit,
Byers.”

Max turned and walked away, leaving him there with the biting wind. It was bitter sweet, his entire
life he wanted to be more, to prove to everyone he was worth something. Now he knew that was an
unattainable dream. He was relieved, finally having the confirmation that he was nothing and
deserved nothing. Will felt tears roll down his face, lips twitching into a smile. He was born with a
set fate, one that would manifest itself in time. No matter how many times he avoided alcohol,
tried to never raise his voice, did everything opposite of the monster that created him, it meant
nothing.

It was all useless, because now he was here, proving he’d never deserve an ounce of forgiveness. If
he couldn’t give it, then he had no right to wish for it from the ones he loved.

Someone like you.

He deserved to be ripped into until he was nothing but a bloody mess on the floor. Sliced open and
begging for help he’d never again deserve.
 Playlist

Will’s playlist

When It’s Cold I’d Like To Die- Moby

Seventeen Going Under- Sam Fender

I Know The End- Phoebe Bridgers

Medicine- Daughter

Somebody Else- The 1995

I Ain’t Ever Loved No One- Donovan Woods

Iris- The Goo Goo Dolls

What Now- Rihanna

Happier- Marshmello & Bastille

All Too Well- Taylor Swift

Because of You- Kelly Clarkson

House With No Mirrors- Sasha Alex Sloan

She Used To Be Mine- Sara Bareilles

Elastic Heart (piano version)- Sia

Lifeline- We Three

So Cold- Ben Cocks

when the party’s over- Billie Eilish

Skinny Love- Bon Iver

Dancing on My Own- Calum Scott

God Must Hate Me- Catie Turner

Human- Christina Perri

Un-Thinkable- City and Colour

The Scientist- Coldplay

Wish You Were Sober- Conan Gray

Teenage Dirtbag- Wheatus

Minefields (acoustic)- Faouzia & John Legend

You’re Somebody Else- flora cash

Falling- Harry Styles

Fine Line- Harry Styles

Alone- Heart

Bad Liar- Imagine Dragons

Backing Down- Isak Danielson

Safe Inside- James Arthur

Hear You Me- Jimmy Eat World

A Little Bit Yours- JP Saxe

Cry- Kelly Clarkson

Before You Go- Lewis Capaldi

Numb- Linkin Park

Monster In Me- Little Mix

Paralyzed- NF

drivers license- Olivia Rodrigo

Stockholm Syndrome

Try- Pink

Easy On Me- Adele

Don’t Deserve You- Plumb

Creep- Radiohead

Samson- Regina Spektor

Stay With Me- Sam Smith

Blood On Me- Sampha

Already Gone- Sleeping At Last

Fourth of July- Sufjan Stevens

Stressed Out- twenty one pilots

Heart Like Yours- Williamette Stone

Heathers- twenty one pilots

Roslyn- St. Vincent & Bon Iver

Skyway Avenue- We the Kings

Control- Zoe Wees

Take On Me- a-ha

tolerate it- Taylor Swift

Anyone- Demi Lovato

Love Is Gone- SLANDER & Dylan Matthew

Romeo- Until The Ribbon Breaks

Breathe Me- Sia

Yellow- Coldplay

Landslide- Fleetwood Mac

715 - Creeks- Bon Iver

I’ll Be Good- Jaymes Young

Mike’s playlist

Complex (demo)- Katie Gregson-MacLeod

Back In Black- AC/DC

Breath- Breaking Benjamin

Sunglasses At Night- Corey Hart

Youth- Daughter

Happier Than Ever- Kelly Clarkson

When I Look At You- Miley Cyrus

Without You- Avicii & Sandro Cavazza

Like Real People Do- Hozier

People Watching- Conan Gray

We Don’t Have To Take Our Clothes Off- Ella Eyre

Adore You- Harry Styles

Be Somebody- Kings of Leon

18- One Direction

Close As Strangers- 5 Seconds of Summer

Us- James Bay

Fuckin’ Perfect- Pink

Whataya Want from Me- Adam Lambert

Someone Like You- Adele

Can You Hear Me- Anson Seabra

Just A Little Bit Of Your Heart- Ariana Grande

Part of Me- By The Coast

Jar of Hearts- Christina Perri

Fix You- Coldplay

Without You- Usher

Stone Cold- Demi Lovato

Arcade- Duncan Laurence

Tears of Gold- Faouzia

Big Girls Don’t Cry- Fergie

I Want to Know What Love Is- Foreigner

How To Save A Life- The Fray

Look After You- The Fray

Weight in Gold- Gallant

Naked- James Arthur

Give Me a Reason- Jillian Rossi

Behind These Hazel Eyes- Kelly Clarkson

Sex On Fire- Kings of Leon

Jealous- Labrinth

Hope is a Heartache- LEON

Someone You Loved- Lewis Capaldi

Tough- Lewis Capaldi

Not Coming Home- Maroon 5

Scared to Be Lonely- Martin Garrix & Dua Lipa

Dynasty- Miia

Falling Apart- Micheal Schulte

Sometimes Hearts Break- Nathan Wagner

traitor- Olivia Rodrigo

Hey There Delilah- Plain White T’s

Take a Bow- Rihanna

Pierre- Ryn Weaver

Like I Can- Sam Smith

Gravity- Sara Bareilles

you broke me first- Tate McRae

Someone To Stay- Vancouver Sleep Clinic

Don’t You- Simple Minds

Holding out for a Hero- Bonnie Tyler

Never Enough- Loren Allred

Linger- The Cranberries

Ghost of You- 5 seconds of summer

Miss Yer Kiss- SWMRS

Champagne Problems- Taylor Swift

Family Line- Conan Gray

my tears ricochet- Taylor Swift

Class Of 2013- Mitski

You Might Not Like Her- Maddie Zahm

gold rush- Taylor Swift

Somewhere Only We Know- Keane

Georgia- Phoebe Bridgers

see you later- Jenna Raine

Do I Wanna Know?- Arctic Monkeys

Their joint playlist

Big Black Car- Gregory Alan Isakov

Glimpse Of Us- Joji

Ava- Family

The Last Time- Taylor Swift

9 Crimes- Damien Rice

The Night We Met- Lord Huron

Keep Me- Novo Amor

What About Us- Pink

Hungry Eyes- Eric Carmen

Only Love Can Hurt Like This- Paloma Faith

Don’t Blame Me- Taylor Swift

Need You Now- Lady Antebellum

Unsaid Emily- Charlie Gillespie

Poison & Wine- Civil Wars

Two Birds- Regina Spektor

Heart by Heart- Demi Lovato

War Of Hearts- Ruelle

Fire Meet Gasoline- Sia

Turning Tables- Adele

The Enemy- Andrew Belle

Till Forever Falls Apart- Ashe & FINNEAS

Someone To You- BANNERS

Angels Fall- Breaking Benjamin

New- Daya

Happier- Ed Sheeran

Explosions- Ellie Goulding

Dead In The Water- Ellie Goulding

Take Me To Church- Hozier

If The World Was Ending- JP Saxe & Julia Michaels

Say Something- Justin Timberlake

E.T.- Katy Perry

Brother- Kodaline

Always Remember Us This Way- Lady Gaga

Bruises- Lewis Capaldi

Hold Me While You Wait- Lewis Capaldi

Miss You- Louis Tomlinson

Two Slow Dancers- Mitski

Nobody Else Will Be There- The National

Stay- Rihanna

You Matter to Me- The Waitress

As the World Caves In- Sarah Cothran

Before the Worst- The Script

Turning Page- Sleeping At Last

Chasing Cars- Snow Patrol

The War- SYML

Time After Time- Cyndi Lauper

exile- Taylor Swift & Bon Iver

Wildest Dreams- Taylor Swift

With or Without You- U2

Beating Heart- Ellie Goulding

So Close- Jon McLaughlin

I Don’t Wanna Live Forever- ZAYN & Taylor Swift

Young and Beautiful- Lana Del Ray

As Long As You’re Mine- Wicked

illicit affairs- Taylor Swift

Dust to Dust- Civil Wars

Coney Island- Taylor Swift

Memories- Conan Gray

Sparks Fly- Taylor Swift

 Chapter 26
Chapter Notes

Jar of Hearts- Christina Perri

The clock was there, ticking towards the end. Will knew that time was a continuous circle, but for
the first time in his life, the circle stopped at a cliff. Soon, it would be over, his timer ringing and
ready to push him off the edge.

Max hadn’t looked at him once throughout the week, the rage on her face was still prevalent,
making his stomach swim. Will tried to not be hurt, he deserved that treatment. He knew how she
saw him now, and it was partially relieving, at least she accepted what he truly was.

Homecoming was that night and they had all been jumping around to try and put the finishing
touches together. He and Mike had the decorations thrown up around the gym. They weren’t
amazing, but definitely good enough that no one would look twice. Will hated that all he wanted to
do was run away, when Mike was near him, his fight or flight kicked in. It hurt to look into his
eyes, knowing what he was doing and that Mike’s best friend despised him. Apparently Max hadn’t
uttered a word about their ‘conversation’ meaning Mike spent his time badgering Will for
information.

It was a torture that was nearing its cracking point.

“You look great, baby.”

“Mom, stop messing with it,” he whined, trying to swat her hand away from his collar.

She rolled her eyes, “when you go to prom you’re going to wear a tie.”

“I don’t like ties, Mom,” he muttered, letting her pat his dress shirt down.

She pressed a kiss to his cheek, “well, just for the pictures then, okay?”
Will couldn’t help but smile, “okay.”

“Jane! Are you ready honey?”

Seconds later, Jane shuffled into the room, a bright smile on her face. She was dressed in a light
red, it almost looked pink. The dress was to her knees with long sleeves. It looked great on her,
which wasn’t a surprise since she’d taken weeks picking it out.

“Oh that’s beautiful,” their mom gushed, a giddy jump in her steps as she walked over to give Jane
a hug.

“You think it’s okay?” Jane asked nervously.

“It’s perfect!” She squeezed them both together, “alright, smile you two.”

Jane happily wrapped her arms around him, joy gracing her features. Will tried to mirror her, but
knew his face was full of deception, a smile was getting harder to keep on.

Someone like you.

“Mom, we’ve gotta go,” he said, laughing slightly as she tried to snap three different angles.

“Arlight,” she said, pressing a kiss to both of their heads, “don’t be out too late, okay? And drive
safely, if you need to be picked up just call me.”

“We will, thanks Mom,” Jane said, shuffling behind him as they walked to the car, “this thing
better start.”

“We’re about to find out,” he muttered, shoving the keys in, wincing as it came to life. Part of him
hoped it would explode into flames, leaving them unable to attend the dance. Or dead. Sadly, he
could never be that lucky. Or unluckily. There was a sticky middle he didn’t want to discuss.

“Thank god.” Jane buckled, leaning back in her seat, the smile never leaving her face, “okay, how
do you think I should ask him to dance?”

Will almost crashed the car when he heard that, “w-what?”

“Mike, I think I’m gonna ask him tonight, should I just go up and do it or try to be subtle? I want to
be subtle, but I really don’t think he’ll pick up on what I’m trying to say if I do that.”

He kept his eyes trained forward, “Jane, maybe…I don’t know.”

She glanced over at him confused, “you think it’s a bad idea?”

“I don’t know,” he said again, chest squeezing with nerves.

He knew the second the question came out of Jane’s mouth it would be over, he would blow up
and fall in front of awaiting eyes.

“Do you think he’s not…” she trailed off, glancing at him with fallen eyes.

It broke his heart, “I just…Mike doesn’t really like to dance so–”

“Well it doesn’t have to be that, I might just see if he wants to go out or something. It doesn’t have
to be anything specific.”

He swallowed tightly, “right.”

“Is something wrong?”

Will parked the car just as Jane fully turned to him. He met her eye for a split second. Her
expression was open, trusting, a look he would never deserve. Biting the inside of his cheek, Will
tried to craft the words in his mouth, wishing someone would reach down his throat and pull them
out.
“I…”

She patted down his collar, “you can talk to me, you know that right? If something is wrong just
tell me, I’m not a baby I can take it. Is he into someone else or something?”

It was right there, his out was being thrown in his face. All he had to do was say one simple word
that would save Jane from pushing this forward. He didn’t even have to tell her it was him.

“Um, I don’t know.”

He lit himself on fire.

Jane’s shoulders lost the fearful tension, and Will wanted to scream. It was like the truth was so far
away he wasn’t able to reach it, no matter how clear it was. An untouchable mountain, looming
over him, but there wasn’t enough air at the top for him to reach it.

“Okay well, he only hangs out with us, so I’m just gonna keep my confidence up, right?” She said,
slipping out of the car. Will didn’t bother to say anything, knowing her statement didn’t warrant an
answer.

They had gotten there early, needing to make sure everything was set up before the rest of the
school got there.

“Hey!” Dustin yelled out as they walked into the gym.

Jane waved excitedly, but all Will could muster was a tiny smile. The night had barely started and
he was already exhausted. Everyone else was already there, shuffling around to get everything set
up.

Robin and Eddie were organizing the front table, Chrissy, Steve, and Dustin were setting up chairs.
Lucas was bothering Max and Mike while they tried to get their instruments in place. The room
was filled with buzzing chatter, but Will felt like he was dropping under water, not bothering to
scramble for help.

“No, stop messing with the tablecloth,” Jane said, hurrying over to Chrissy.
“It’s uneven!” The blonde girl flicked Jane’s hand away, “I’m fixing them.”

Will sighed and walked over to the entrance, staring at the gold and black paint. The gold was
shaky, jagged and holding an ugliness to it. Will assumed his touch did that, causing the once rich
color to ooze out a shade that resembled dirt.

“I don’t think staring is going to change it.”

He jumped, spinning around to see Mike walking up to him. Will crossed his arms almost
immediately, not having expected to be confronted so quickly.

“Can still try,” he said, hoping Mike didn’t catch onto his sharp reaction.

The elder boy sent him an easy smile, “it looks good. You look good.”

He flushed, “thanks.”

“Not going to give me a compliment?”

Will melted, taking in the boy in front of him. He was wearing a dark blue button up, sleeves rolled
up. Each piece of jewelry was still intact, making him look expensive. Beautiful, Mike was always
so beautiful.

“You look great.”

Mike rolled his eyes, “I’m so convinced, thank you.”

“Next time I’ll give you a whole speech to prove it, I promise.”

Will knew there wouldn't be any next time.

“I’ll hold you to that, Byers,” Mike stepped closer, leaning down to bump their heads together,
“you do look really pretty.”

Will closed his eyes, “so do you.”

“Are you going to dance with me tonight?”

His heart plummeted down, “what?”

“Dance, I think…I don’t know, we don’t have to, but Max didn’t have a problem with it and I
really um…I thought– nevermind I don’t want to make you–”

Will cut him off, “we can talk about it, okay?”

Mike smiled, “okay.”

“Hey Mike! Come help me with this,” Max’s voice was sharp, filled with dry disgust. Mike
stepped away and turned to the redhead.

“Can you not ask someone–”

“Nope, come on,” she said, walking over and yanking on Mike’s arm, pulling him behind her.

Someone like you. Someone who only causes pain, who hurts the people around him, someone that
should be locked away so they couldn’t destroy anyone else. A monster.

Will looked towards the ground, feeling his skin crawl. The look she gave him was chilling, a
constant reminder of what he was. It was good she pulled Mike away, it was better that he was out
of sight from someone like Will.
—-------

Time passed swiftly, the gym filling with students before Will even had time to breathe. There was
something so intimate about huge crowds of people, he could hide away and no one would ever bat
an eye. If he ran off and never turned around, the music would keep going, people wouldn’t stop
dancing, they’d think nothing of his lack of existence.

An intimacy not well known or wanted; but Will would forever crave it.

He stood near the wall, leaned against it as music reverberated through the gym. Different voices
came into his ears and slipped on out. He gathered nothing from the surface level conversations.
Will kept his eyes stuck on the clock, watching it tick by. With each passing second he saw the
circle beginning to flatten. A warning.

Even with the loud hoards of people, Will heard footsteps walking towards him. He had
memorized them, no matter the situation he’d always know who they belonged to.

“Fuck, Max wouldn’t let me walk away,” Mike said with a short breath, leaning against the wall
next to him.

Will nodded, “is everything okay?”

“Yeah, she’s just being a shit, maybe she and Lucas got in a fight or something.”

“Maybe.”

They stood there in silence, and Will allowed himself the small comfort. Mike was illuminated
under a green light, and he couldn’t help but think how ironic it was. The ethereal boy was right
there, so visible, as if Will could paint his every move; but no matter what, he’d always be
untouchable, a sight never truly grasped.

“Come on.”
Will pressed his brows together, “what?”

“Come on , let’s go somewhere else before I have to play,” Mike grabbed his hand, sliding their
fingers together. For the first time, the touch felt out of place.

Mike pulled him through the crowd and close to an exit. During the commotion, Will turned his
head, catching his gaze on a fiery redhead. His stopwatch started blaring, Max’s fragmented eyes
giving him the final warning.

Times up.

The door shut behind him with a small click, but it was still too loud. Mike guided him through the
dimly lit halls without a word, seeming utterly content. It reminded Will of sleeping beauty,
watching Aurora walk towards her demise.

Mike yanked him into an empty classroom, and Will didn’t get a good look around before his back
was being pressed against the door. He let out a tiny gasp that Mike caught with his mouth. The
taller boy took a step closer, pressing their chests together. Will fell into the addiction, not being
able to help himself. He slid his hands into Mike’s wild hair, gripping onto it like a lifeline.

The elder boy pressed a hand next to his face. The rings sat close to their designated spots, his
cheeks aching to have the metal against them. Will twisted his head to get a better angle, letting out
a shaky breath against Mike’s lips. As they stood close, pulling on each other with desperation,
Will began to feel empty. He let out a whimper, tears flooding his eyes.

“Hey, what’s going on?” Mike whispered, panting as he tried to pull away.

Will couldn’t do it yet, he wasn’t ready, “kiss me, please just…just kiss me.”

“Will, why are you shaking–”

He cupped the side of Mike’s face, “kiss me, just…” One more time.

Will carved his back into the door, sharply pressing Mike’s lips back to his own and taking all he
could get. It was selfish, but he couldn’t help himself. The delicacy Mike held was hard to find,
rarely ever there for anyone to see. Will was so terrified that moment would be the last time he held
it in his hands.

The music was still pounding, and Will began to make out the lyrics, one’s that began to crack him.

Hot summer days, rock and roll the way you'd play for me at your show

Will glided his fingers through every curl he found, tugging on them until there was no resistance.
His eyes fluttered as Mike dragged a hand up his waist.

And all the ways I got to know your pretty face and electric soul

“I love you…” Mike spoke, voice trembling against his swollen lips. The timer finally snapped,
looming over his head. He froze.

Will you still love me when I’m no longer beautiful?

Pulling away, he glanced to the side, trying his best not to cry. Mike didn’t utter another word, still
standing impossibly close. Will couldn’t breathe.

“I can’t, y-you don’t,” he got out, a break in his tone.

He finally pricked his finger.

Mike stiffened, “what?”

“You don’t love me, you can’t,” he swallowed, “Jane–”

“What the hell does your sister have to do with this? Will, what are you saying?” Mike asked.
He shook his head, “she’s got this huge crush on you a-and I– I can’t do that to her–”

Mike cupped his face, “but I want you.”

“Mike–”

“I-I want to be with you, I want to love you,” Mike’s voice was filled with a desperate plea,
trembling with a fear Will hadn't heard before. The elder boy was pulling on his face, trying to get
their eyes to meet. “Will come on, come on listen to me, I love you–”

“Stop, stop saying that, you don’t. You can’t, you can’t love me, y-you don’t even know– I’m not
doing that to Jane–”

“What about me?” Mike whispered, his voice cracking as tears spread in his eyes.

“Mike–”

“Stop just fucking saying my name, what about me? W-What do you think– what did you think
was going to happen? That you’d tell me that and I’d just waltz over and ask her out? I want you–”

“No you don’t–”

Mike took a step back, “stop saying that. So what you found out your sister likes me? We were
together first–”

“No.”

“What?”

Will took a deep breath, “I’ve known since the second time we talked.”
“Will–”

“I tried to help set you up, she’s practically been in love with you since freshman year, and I can’t
do this to her,” he rushed out, tears feeling like ice cubes on his face. It was all robotic.

Mike’s lips were parted, “so what was I–”

“Mike, don’t–”

“Shut up! Just fucking shut up, stop saying my name, j-just stop. What was I? You obviously never
had any intention to actually be with me, that’s fucking clear, at some point you knew you were
always going to do this. You kissed me, you let me fall in love with you knowing you’d fucking
walk away. So did you have fun?” Mike choked out, tears streaming down his cheeks.

“Jane wanted you first–”

“This isn’t about her! Are you not listening to me at all? It’s not about what she wants, I’m not toy,
I-I’m not–” Mike pressed his eyes closed, hands shaking, “I’m not a toy, I’m not, I-I’m…is that
how you see me? Is that…is that all I am to you?”

Will stood frozen, “no–”

“Don’t lie to me! Stop fucking lying to me, was any of this real? I’m so fucking stupid, I’m so–
god, who am I kidding? I kept pushing, and the whole time you were just laughing at me, I’m a
fucking joke–” Mike muttered the words quickly, running a hand through his hair continuously,
yanking on it.

He reached a hand out, “just wait–”

Mike flinched back, “don’t fucking touch me, d-don’t– I trusted you…I told you I fucking trusted
you, and the entire time you knew that you were never going to be with me, I was nothing and I let
you toss me around because I’m so fucking in love with you,” Mike sobbed, the pure heartbreak in
his voice not hard to find.

“I’m sorry.”
The elder boy let out a wet laugh, “no you’re not. You don’t care, I don’t even know who you
are…I created someone in my head that I love, and it’s not you. He just fucking looks like you.”

Will stood there, taking everything and letting the words carve into his skin. The tears were silent,
they always had been. For a moment, he remembered the night he saw Mike, their eyes locking for
the first time, completely unknown and oblivious to the pain they’d soon cause one another. Now
Will didn’t know what he was looking at, there was no wonder or curiousity in Mike’s eyes, not
anymore. Not for him.

“What did Max know?” Mike whispered.

He kept their stares locked, “I tried to help her set you two up, she asked me why we were fighting
that day in the woods and I said it was because we talked about Jane and you…you were offened
that I said you’d hurt her–”

Mike laughed once again, this time it felt sinister, “so not only did you lie to everyone, you made
me look like a fucking jerk that led Jane on? You did that to save your ass? You’re fucking
pathetic.”

He took it, another stab and he just took it. Will felt someone inside of him screaming, begging to
be let out. It was the little boy he once knew, the one filled with hope, a desire to create beauty in
the world. For the first time, someone stood in front of him, telling him they wanted him, yelling it
at him. Will shattered that, made that special person hate him in a matter of seconds. It was a
disturbing talent.

“I know,” he said softly, the tears gone at this point. There was nothing.

“Why don’t you care?” Mike got out, and Will felt deja vu take over. Maybe if he tried hard
enough, he could go back to the moment it first was asked that question and changed the course of
time. That past Mike had wanted him, had fallen for him. This Mike didn’t, he finally knew who
Will was. The real Will Byers wasn’t someone anyone could truly love.

“I don’t know what you want me to say.”

Mike took a step closer, “I want you to c-care! Why don’t you fucking– why? Why? What is wrong
with you? Y-You did this to me, you humiliated me and you don’t care,” Mike sobbed, thrusting a
hand out and pushing him. It was too light, Will almost begged him to do it harder, to hurt him.
Make him pay for it in the only way he knew how.

“I-I…I’m sorry, I never wanted–”

“To hurt anyone?” Mike asked, tone flat, “is that what you were going to say?”

He dipped his head down, “yes.”

“You don’t care about anyone, you’re so fucking selfish, I can’t believe I didn’t see it. Y-You
don’t even see me as a person. I’m not your toy, I don’t belong to anyone, especially not you. You
didn’t have any f-fucking right to toss me around like I meant nothing.” Mike sobbed, breaking
down as Will could only stand there. It was almost like he was watching a show, unable to reach
through the screen and make the character feel better, to fix the set plot.

“I do care about you,” he got out, knowing it was useless.

Mike let out a cutting sob, “no y-you don’t, you used me. I don’t know you, you’re not my friend,
and you’re definetly not my boyfriend. We were never anything but your little shameful secret,
that’s how you see m-me. You’re a stupid fucking jock that kicks people for fun and I fell into
your trap.”

He wanted to curl into a ball and cover his ears, make it all stop; but it was deserved, every single
word, no matter how much they hurt. Will knew how to take it. He could take it all. If that’s what
Mike needed him to do, he could.

“You’re right, I’m sorry,” he said, cracking with every passing second. The clock had snapped,
now spinning out wildly.

Mike took a step closer, “I’m done with you, I-I don’t want to see you, I don’t want anything to do
with you. I’m done with…with whatever this was. You mean nothing to me.”

“Mike–”
“Don’t say my fucking name.” With that Mike harshly wiped his eyes and pushed past him,
walking out of the room and away from him for the last time.

The door slammed behind him, and it rung out into the silent room. Will stood there motionless,
the moonlight barely lighting the space.

As if the world was tilting, he slid to the ground, silent tears making dents into his face. He let his
eyes move around, realizing he was sitting in the old art room. The paints were dried out, not
salvagable. Will tucked his knees close, letting out quiet whimpers, trying to stop shaking.

“It’s okay,” he whispered to himself, rocking back and forth, “it’s okay, it’s o-okay, you’re okay.”

The last word cracked, Will going right along with it. One loud sob fell from his mouth, causing
his chest to burn. He couldn’t stop his body from tipping to the side, laying curled in a pathetic ball
against the wall. It was familiar, he knew no one was coming.

Someone like you. Someone so pathetic.

Maybe in another lifetime he’d be able to paint Mike. To capture the pure and heartfelt expression
Will would never see again. In another life he’d know how to love someone like Mike.

And maybe, in some life, he deserved to be loved back.

 Chapter 27
Chapter Notes

Not Coming Home- Maroon 5

He was still, but the room spun around him, a reminder that he couldn’t stay locked away forever.
Will’s face was burning, the tightness on his skin now suffocating. Hiding wouldn’t work, not
anymore.

“Hey everyone!” Robin’s voice rang out through the halls. Will pinched his eyes shut before
slumping to his feet.

The door squeaked open as he left, everything becoming impossibly loud as he moved closer
towards the gym. Will had to squint as he pushed open the doors, the lights too bright, causing his
blurred vision to worsen.

“Will! Where have– are you okay?” Chrissy hurried towards him, her eyes widened with concern.

“I’m okay.”

“You look like you’re about to be sick, come on let's go sit outside–”

“I’m fine,” Will said, his voice flat and unmoving.

“Will–”

“I’m fine.”

She rested a hand on his shoulder, “you look really sick, maybe we should go sit down–”
“Where’s Jane?”

Chrissy looked taken back, “oh uh…I think she’s closer to the front? Lucas is up there with her.”

“I’m going to go–”

“No stop, talk to me, what’s going on?” Chrissy held her grip, “are you overheated? Where the hell
did you even go?”

“I didn’t go–”

Will was cut off by the sound of Mike’s guitar, it felt harsh, screaming through the gym. He
couldn’t help but flinch, the music cutting into him.

“ When you refuse me you confuse me. What makes you think I'll let you in again?” Mike’s voice
didn’t sound right, it was holding a slight tremble, sharper than it ever had been before.

Swallowing tightly, he turned around, spinning eyes catching the stage.

“Holy shit, what’s up with him?” Chrissy asked, taking Will’s hand in hers, “do you think he’s
high?”

Will’s shattered heart stilled, “maybe.”

“Go on, misuse me and abuse me, I’ll come out stronger in the end.”

He wanted to scream, to cover his ears and run out of the room. It felt impossible, like the doors
had been locked, bars flying up to keep him from getting away. Every single word Mike spat at
him was fresh, the wounds having no time to close. As the curly-headed boy came into view,
fingers dug into Will’s bloody cuts and spread them apart. The pain felt numbing, blinding in a
way he had no control over.

“Does it make you sad to find yourself alone?” Mike’s eyes were bloodshot, no sign of the kind
brown in sight. It was as if someone wiped off Mike’s true face, giving him a broken mask that
was sewn into place. Will felt sick knowing he was the one with the needle.

“Hey guys!” Jane said happily, an unknowing smile on her face.

“I would do anything to end your suffering, but you would rather walk away.”

Their eyes met again, and Will felt shame wash over him. Mike’s glare was hateful, a vengeance in
it he’d never seen before. He glanced to the side, knowing the stare was still stuck on him.

“What’s going on?” Chrissy asked, looking at him. Suspicion.

“When you answer the door, pick up the phone you won't find me 'cause I'm not coming home,”
Mike usually had such a warm voice, the sound zooming over everyone and becoming intoxicating.
Now, it was nothing like that. It was almost as if the audience could feel it, the joyful cheers
drowning out as Will was forced to look up again. An invisible hand grabbed his face and yanked
his eyes forward. A new form of torture.

“Will, what the hell is going on?” Lucas pressed, a hand on his shoulder. He flinched back,
breathing becoming impossible.

The song ended, people cheering without a thought in the world. Will stood there motionless, jaw
clenched, feeling as if he’d been yelled at once more. Mike apparently had one last thing to say,
making sure Will was nothing but a tossed out rag, wrung dry and unusable to anyone in need.

“Are they gonna perform again?” Jane asked, walking back over to them.

“Uh, I don’t think so, not for another hour or so,” Steve said, looking down at his watch.

Time, Will had one last clock to confront. He was running out of time for that one to stay intact.

“Jane, we need to go home,” he got out, ignoring the eyes Lucas and Chrissy were sending him.
Whatever they pieced together was leaving air in the room in short supply.
“What? No I don’t want to go, I’ll just get a ride home,” she said, looking at him confused, “I told
you, I wanted to talk to Mike.”

The room was too loud, people brushing past him. Touching him, making it near impossible to get
a single thought through his head. Jane was illuminated under a green light. Untouchable.

“Jane, can we please just go home–”

“He’s over here!” Eddie yelled, walking over to them with a jump in his step. “We’re only getting a
short break, so come on little Byers, you got this.”

“Will…” Lucas said, staring at him worriedly, Chrissy holding the same mocking look.

The room was an explosion of lights and unclear faces. He needed to move, to do something,
maybe take Jane’s hand and drag her out of the gym; but there was a leash on his neck, yanking
him back to the hell he’s known for seventeen years.

“Jane, Jane just wait–” He got his feet to move, but it was already too late, his voice nothing but a
soft wind in the room. When he saw Mike’s towering figure, it felt much too soon, their last
‘conversation’ still fresh.

For a moment, he almost believed it was a nightmare. Robin, Eddie, and Max stood behind Mike.
Will stumbled up to Jane while Steve, Dustin, Chrissy, and Lucas found their way forward. It was
an audience, everyone waiting for the show of a lifetime.

“Shit, hey Mike…sorry, didn’t mean to crowd you or anything.” Jane cleared her throat.

Will pressed his eyes shut, “Jane, please just stop–”

“No, what is it?” Mike asked, his voice cracked. At that moment, Will knew there was not a
rational thought in the teen’s head.
“Mike, maybe don’t,” Max whispered, tone sharp.

It was useless. Will had made his own plank and now had to walk off it.

“You want to ask me out?” Mike pressed, but his eyes weren’t anywhere near Jane.

Will glanced up, catching the harsh gaze being sent his way. Mike’s cheeks were tattooed with tear
tracks, a reminder that Will broke the most precious artwork in his world.

“How did you know…” Jane trailed off, following Mike’s line of sight. Will looked towards the
floor, biting down on his lip so harshly it drew blood, “Will?”

“Holy shit…” Steve whispered, and the dominos began to fall.

The spotlight finally dropped on Will’s head, causing every stare to shoot his way in seconds. He
glanced up, not seeing anything other than Mike’s tear filled eyes.

“What’s going on?” Jane continued, her voice slow.

“Why don’t you ask your brother?”

Will cut in, “please stop–”

“Oh you want me to fucking stop?” Mike took a step forward, “come on sweetheart , tell them, tell
them what you told me.”

A wave of shocked gasps ran through the room, conversations around them coming to a halt. Will
felt as if he’d been stabbed in the chest, slowly casting his eyes towards Jane. Her lips were parted,
heartbreak beginning to write itself on her features.

“Mike stop , that’s enough, come on–” Max’s attempt was useless. Mike ripped his arm from her
hold.
“You knew too Max, you knew and you didn’t fucking tell me. Did all of you know?” Mike’s
voice was raising with every passing second, “did everyone know I was being fucking played
with? Am I the only idiot that couldn’t see it? Answer me, did you all know!”

Steve held a hand up, “Mike, calm down man, we don’t know what you’re talking about, we didn’t
know anything–”

“What is going on?” Jane asked, still standing in the middle of it all as Eddie pulled Mike back,
“Will, what the hell is going on? What did you do?”

His mouth opened, but nothing came out, shock coursing through his system. He stood motionless,
the world he’s crafted falling apart at the seams.

“I…” he choked out, catching Mike’s tear-filled gaze one last time, “I-I…I didn’t–”

“Jane I can’t go out with you, I’m sure if your brother gets his head out of his ass he can tell you
why,” Mike said dryly, exhaustion written on his face, their eyes never unlocking, “can’t you Will?
Why don’t you tell her how long we’ve been dating? I’m sure she’d love to hear about that.”

Mike yanked himself out of Eddie’s grip and pushed through the crowd, leaving a burning mess in
his wake. The shoe finally dropped, and Will hadn’t even been the one to do it. A coward. Mike
was right, he was utterly pathetic. The silence that followed was sickening, people he didn’t even
know staring towards him with their mouths dropped open. Will casted his eyes around cautiously,
taking in the embarrassment he surely deserved.

“You didn’t…Will, tell me you didn’t,” Chrissy whispered, looking at him with pure
disappointment.

“I’m sorry.”

Robin had her mouth covered, “holy shit.”

“Will?” Jane’s voice was broken, her bottom lip shaking with the threat of tears. He looked at her,
his heart breaking when he saw how shattered she looked. “Is he telling the truth? D-Did you
actually…”
It hurt knowing she still held an ounce of trust. Everyone else took Mike’s word, but Jane, she
waited, believing Will was better than the scum he proved himself to be.

“Yes,” he got out, unable to swallow the words down.

Her face broke, “oh my god…”

“Jane–” She shook her head, and just like Mike, rushed through the crowd. Will couldn’t bring
himself to look at the others and quickly walked after her, “Jane wait, just wait a minute please–”

She made it to the parking lot before turning around, tears rolling down her face. Will let the gym
door fall shut behind him. The music was beating in the background, barely audible.

“It has been fucking months, Will!” Jane yelled, voice cracking with each word.

He pressed his eyes shut, “I know, I’m sorry–”

“I-If you would have just told me, told me that you liked him, told me anything I would have–
you’re my brother. Do you honestly think I would have been upset with you for liking the same
guy I did?”

Will bit his lip, “I didn’t want to hurt you…”

“You did hurt me! It doesn’t matter what you wanted to do. All you had to do was talk to me. You
couldn’t even do that! You led me on for months, letting me think he liked me, was that funny to
you or something?”

He shook his head quickly, “n-no, no of course not, I just…I panicked and I didn’t know w-what to
do–”

“Why? I don’t understand, getting with the guy I like, the guy I’ve liked for two years without
telling me? I’m not a child Will! If he didn’t like me back I would have moved on, If he liked you,
I would have been happy for you; but you fucked it all up! Just like you always do,” Jane didn’t
bother wiping her face, “seriously, a-all you had to do was talk to me, and I gave you so many
chances to tell me the fucking truth, in the car I asked you if he liked someone else and you lied to
my face! Over and over again you lied to me and I trusted you.”

“I’m sorry.”

She held her arms close, and Will despised himself for how small she looked. Years of work had
gone into trying to protect her, keeping the pain he knew hidden. Now, he had caused every piece
of it. The only thing he should have been protecting her from is himself.

“I know you don’t see me like this, and it’s fine, I’m your dumb little sister, but you’re my best
friend. Y-You have always been my best friend and no matter what, I want you to be happy; but it
doesn’t even matter, because all you want to do is be miserable, and then everyone around you has
to fucking deal with it. I don’t even know what to say…y-you could have told me the truth and I
hope you’d know I’d still love you, I’d tell you I’m glad you found someone that makes you
happy. You know why? Because you’re important to me. Apparently it’s not reciprocated, because
you couldn’t even look me in the face when I directly asked you if he didn’t want to be with me.”

“Jane–”

“You let me humiliate myself in front of the entire school, that was fucking humiliating.” As she
sobbed out the last word, Will had to look away, guilt chewing at him. The cold wind hit against
their faces, causing the tears to freeze.

His head was beating at this point, two people he held so close to his heart finally saw what he
was, and he shattered them for his own gain.

Someone like you. A pathetic monster.

“I’m so sorry,” he choked out, wiping his face.

Jane sniffled, “just take me home.”

“Jane–”
“Take me home .”

He gave up, knowing it was useless. The drive was filled with painful silence, and Will didn’t
bother to break it. Jane had always worn her feelings on her sleeve, not bothering to hide them from
the world. He’d always admired that about her, the pure trust she held in others was something he
craved.

No matter how many times he looked at her, Jane ignored each stare, telling him exactly what he
needed to know without uttering a word. She was done with him, and he couldn’t find it in himself
to blame her.

When they pulled into the dirt driveway, Jane threw the door open.

“Can we–”

“Don’t talk to me, you already had your chance,” she whispered, “j-just don’t. Leave me alone.”

She walked in the front door, leaving Will to sit there. He was alone, and there was no one out
there to blame other than himself. Laying his head down on the wheel, he couldn’t cry. No tears
were left inside of him, each one hollowing out and leaving him dry.

When he walked inside, Jane’s broken sobs could be heard throughout the house.

“Honey it’s okay, I’ve got you, it’s okay,” he heard his mom whisper.

Will held his arms close as he walked past Jane’s cracked door, seeing her curled up in their mom’s
arms. Neither of them noticed, and Will wouldn’t have it any other way. He didn’t want to see the
disappointment in his mom’s eyes, knowing that would be the final blow.

Shuffling to his room, he messed with the broken lock for a moment. Last year he had attempted to
fix it, trying to keep everything inside closed up without space to escape. He had failed, giving up
after weeks of trying. Will sat on the bed, staring at it, wondering what would have happened if he
just tried one more time to keep the door sealed. Maybe then he’d be able to hide from all the
nightmares that stood right outside the four walls.
Though it was a useless thought. It was much too late now.
 Chapter 28
Chapter Notes

Just a Little Bit Of Your Heart- Ariana Grande

Mike was confident he understood pain. He thought about his life, still feeling as if he was
watching his family slip away, unable to stop them. He hadn’t been good enough, no matter how
hard he tried, people left him there to rot. It was naïve to think that would ever change, that the
person he was fated to be was suddenly seen differently. It was foolish and he had become a
laughing stock in the process.

Looking at the dirty mirror did nothing to hide his reflection. He wanted it to crack, become shards
that could only be used as a weapon. Mike felt like everything was moving, continuing on as if his
heart hadn’t been ripped out and cut up. Will was probably still holding the bloody scissors. If he
tried hard enough, the blood covering the cold-hearted boy’s arm was visible in his mind.

The name. The stupid name sent waves of agony through him. Will Byers, a person that would
forever haunt him. Growing up Mike had been desperate to fall in love, seeing the beauty of it and
wishing to know what it may feel like. The fantasies, stories filled with wonder and magic. A type
of magic that could only come from love, it kept his eyes bright. Will had dimmed them in a matter
of seconds. Plucking out over a decade of hope.

Mike pressed his lips firmly together, a sob bubbling up as he covered his ears. Each thought was
too loud, the memories hammering at him. There wasn’t anywhere to hide, the noise didn’t have
mercy. He was stupid, so embarrassingly stupid that he fell in love with someone that thought
nothing of him, and decided he was some fun fling to push off later. Will’s eyes had never looked
so dead, so uncaring. It was an utter nightmare, one Mike would never dare speak aloud.

The Will Byers he loved was a delusion, one that never had any intention to be real. He tried to be
perfect, to be someone Will might have wanted. He tried to not be clingy, to not scare Will away, to
not be the person everyone left over and over again. Mike had tried everything only to be torn to
shreds, a piece of waste that would drift away, no one caring where it may go.

“Mike? Are you in here?”

He clenched his eyes shut, “g-go away.”

The bathroom door opened, “Mike, you need to breathe–”

A hand pressed against his arm and he recoiled. The idea of being touched made him sick, a tight
ball growing larger in his chest, making it near impossible to make sense of anything.

“No, no no no,” he muttered quickly, pressing his hands tighter to his ears, wanting them to bleed
until hearing ceased to exist.

“Okay, alright it’s going to be okay…can you see me?”

Mike shook his head, “no, go away, go a-away.”

“Hey, I know, I know you want to be left alone, but we can’t do that right now, okay? I need you to
just look at me.”

He let out a choppy breath, peeling his eyes open. Eddie was crouched down, his hands held up,
attempting to show he was harmless. Mike tried to make him into a full image, but his vision was
too blurry, the pictures in front of his eyes burning.

“Great, you’re doing great, can I touch you?”

Mike scooted back, “n-no, no don’t–”

“I won’t, I promise, just asking.” Eddie scooted back as well, giving Mike space to breathe.

The dingy bathroom drifted into silence, nothing to be heard other than Mike’s unsteady gasps. He
wanted the lights to be turned off, hating how they beat into his skin. It was all too much, but
somehow not enough at the same time. A mix of pure misery.

After a few minutes, he allowed his hands to fall. Mike didn’t say a word, eyes trained on the
ground.
“You want to tell me what happened?” Eddie asked softly, still not moving closer.

Mike tore at his bottom lip, “nothing–”

“Mike.”

He pulled his knees close, “I want my mom.”

Eddie let out a helpless sigh, “well, I’m no Mrs. Wheeler, but I can give some great hugs.”

That seemed to be the last crack, a watery laugh spilled from his lips, though it didn’t last long.
After a few beats, they turned to gut-wrenching sobs Mike was helpless to stop. He curled forward,
Eddie catching him before he hit the floor.

Mike pressed his head into Eddie’s shoulder, back aching as the cries made no sign of stopping. It
was a lifeline, one he had been needing for the last few hours. Though, no matter how great
Eddie’s hugs were, they didn’t hold anything to a certain football player’s arms.

“I h-hate him, I hate him, I hate him,” Mike repeated it over in his head as he spoke, wanting to
believe the words, desperately wishing they were true. “I want to hate him, why…”

“It’s okay, hey it’s okay,” Eddie whispered, practically saying nonsense. Mike felt the snot running
from his nose, but didn’t have the energy to wipe it away, to hide. “Mike, it’s okay…”

“I’m so stupid,” he choked, voice getting stuck on a cough, his chest shaking.

Eddie rubbed his back, “you’re not stupid.”

He knew that was a lie, but didn’t bother to refute it. Mike let the sobs wear him out, head
pounding as it all slipped away.

“What happened?” Eddie whispered, not moving their position.

“Got played,” he muttered, “he didn’t even want to be with me…I thought we– I wanted him, I
tried to be good enough for him, I did everything and he never even wanted to– I’m an idiot, all I
did was fucking embarrass myself. Now I just outed myself in front of the whole fucking school a-
and I just– I want it all to stop, I-I hate him, I hate it, I–”

Eddie ran a hand through Mike’s sweat-soaked hair, “alright don’t work yourself up, breathe
buddy.”

He attempted to follow the instructions, letting Eddie count each intake for him. It was a slow
process, Mike knew he was a difficult person to deal with. Maybe Will figured that out before he
had time to hide it.

“Thanks.”

“So…we all thought you had a thing with Jane.”

Mike didn’t move, “oh.”

“Guess we got the wrong sibling.”

“Wish you didn’t.” His voice shook, threatening to snap.

Eddie nodded, “Will Byers.”

A tear rolled down Mike’s face, dripping across his lips. For a moment, he could feel Will against
him, kissing him one last time. Maybe he should have savored it, kept the memory locked away
before his world was shattered by the person he wanted most.

“Will Byers,” Mike repeated, the name feeling like poison on his tongue.

“Shit I just… damn Mike, we had no fucking idea.”

Mike felt a broken smile twitch on his lips. He had always liked that, not out of shame, but because
Will felt special. From the very beginning, Will was a treasure, something no one else got to touch.
They were never under a magnifying glass, their story disconnected from the outside world. Now it
all felt fake, the memories in his mind warped. He didn’t know who Will Byers was. The kind,
soft-spoken, loving boy was nothing but a fabricated dream. Now Mike saw the truth, Will was
nothing more than a jerk that played with people’s feelings. He fell for it, let himself be walked
over for someone else’s fun. Will was never going to love him.

“I don’t even know who he is.”

Eddie pulled back slightly, “who was he to you?”

“He…” Mike swallowed his tears, “I thought he was my best friend. He’s just a fucking liar.”

“Everything?” Eddie asked.

“What?”

“He lied about everything?” The question was slow as if the long-haired boy was trying to tread
carefully. “Look, I don’t know Will like you do, but I–”

“You’re right, you don’t.” Mike harshly wiped his eyes, “you don’t and you’re lucky you don’t.”

It was a useless attempt to try and rid the tears, they continued to fall with no care. Mike had been
excited about homecoming, the first time he ever had a reason to be. The night before he’d planned
it all out, he knew Will didn’t like the attention, so they didn’t have to dance in front of other
people. He was going to take him into the hallway and spin him around. Just one time, he wanted
to go to a dance and actually dance one time. It was embarrassing to think about now, Will was just
having his fun, and Mike had been a pawn.

“I tried to be perfect,” he whispered, old tears becoming cold on his face as new ones arose.

Eddie held him closer, “Mike, you don’t need to do that–”

“He didn’t want me anyway. I should have– no matter what I just messed it up–”

“Hey, I need you to listen to me,” Eddie paused, “you didn’t do anything wrong, okay? Nothing
you could have done would have changed this. He knew what he was doing from the very first
second, and maybe…I don’t know after it all calms down just try to talk to him–”

“I tried,” he choked out, “I tried, I begged him to talk to me. If he just– I wanted a fucking
explanation, I wanted him to treat me like a person that actually has feelings and he couldn’t even
do that. He just…he just fucking stood there, ‘I don’t know what you want me to say’ are you
fucking kidding me? I-I wanted him to care, why doesn’t he even care? What could I have done so
wrong to make him look at me like that?”

“Shit, he said that?”

Mike clenched his eyes shut, “pretty much the only thing he actually said. I-It’s like he wasn’t
even there. Always thought he had green eyes but…I don’t know, maybe I was delusional because
they just looked brown. An ugly fucking brown.”

“Well, if it makes you feel any better, I’m pretty sure you just humiliated him in front of the whole
school,” Eddie said with a dry snort.

He let out a shaky sigh, “I didn’t want to do that, I just– I saw his face and kind of l-lost it.”

“Love makes you crazy–”

“Shut up,” he breathed out, finally reaching up to wipe the snot from his face. “I thought I loved
him. Maybe I was wrong the whole time.”

“Girls were right ya know? Guys fucking suck.”

Mike released a watery laugh, “y-yeah, guess so.”

The bathroom door spun open for the second time. Mike glanced up, seeing Robin and Max
walking in with wild eyes.
“Shit, we’ve been looking for you everywhere,” Robin said, slightly out of breath.

Max stepped forward, “Mike–”

“I don’t want to talk to you.”

“No, I know, but can you just listen–”

He sat up, shifting away as the redhead came closer, “I don’t want to listen, I-I’m so fucking done
listening to people’s bullshit, you should have told me.”

“Mike, just hear her out,” Eddie whispered, trying to stay calm.

“It wasn’t my place to tell you, okay?”

“So you just let me humiliate myself in front of a guy that obviously was going to fuck me over?”
His voice cracked, but he couldn’t find it in himself to care.

Max sighed, “I was going to tell you if he didn’t. I wouldn’t have let this go on for any longer,
okay? I know maybe I should have just said something and that’s shitty of me, but I figured you
wanted to hear it from him…maybe I was wrong about that.”

He curled up, holding his knees close. Robin sat down on the other side of him while Max was still
crouched. It looked like she was approaching a wild animal, though he figured it was a good
comparison.

“You think he’s an asshole too?” He muttered.

Max’s face slipped into a grin, “I think he’s the biggest fucking asshole ever.”

That was enough for him, at least at the moment. Mike gave her an opening nod, allowing her to
come into the tiny circle. She quickly wrapped him in a hug, and that motion made the sobs try to
make a reappearance. One slipped out, his throat aching. Though, as it came, two new pairs of
arms joined Max. He wasn’t alone, no matter how he may feel that way.

“You know, it’s not really your fault,” Robin said, “I mean, he’s got the face of a puppy, anyone
could have been fooled.”

“Robin, really?” Max said, a snorting laugh in her voice.

“What? I’m trying to make him feel better for getting his heart broken by–”

“Okay, that’s enough,” Eddie said.

They stayed like that for another moment, Mike wrapped up so tightly that he began to sweat once
again. Though, the emptiness he felt was still prevalent, not seeming to go anywhere.

Will had created a spot in his heart, one Mike had made a little room for. He decorated it with all
of Will’s favorite things. Nothing football related, Mike had worked out it wasn’t really that
enjoyable for him. He put cups of paint with brushes to accompany each one, making sure to get
the primary colors. There was a twin bed in the corner too. Will didn’t take up much space when
sleeping, barely moved an inch. He curled up in the corner and usually used one fuzzy blanket or
just a sheet. He put up posters of nineties boybands, Mike got a peek of Will’s playlist and knew he
liked those, though he never said anything about it.

Maybe if he had more time, he’d put up a door, one with a fancy lock that would give Will privacy
when he needed it. Even then, he’d still be there, safely laid in Mike’s heart. Now looking into the
room it was torn apart, every poster, every single paintbrush ripped to pieces. Will had blown it up
and walked away.

“It’s going to be okay.” Max pulled back, sending him a small smile. “He’s just another guy, and if
a guy is who you want, we can find you one that’ll treat you right.”

“Yeah, being…gay?” Robin asked, obviously trying to get clarification.

Mike’s lips twitched, “yeah.”

“Being gay changes nothing, you know that, there are probably lines of guys waiting for their
chance.”

Eddie rolled his eyes, “this isn’t the bachelor, maybe we should wait before sending him into the
wild with a rose.”

“You watch the bachelor?” Max muttered, lips twisted with amusement.

“I outed myself in front of the school,” he whispered, ignoring the comment. Hororr was rising
inside of him, “ s-shit , I fucking outed myself–”

“Hey, it’s going to be alright, don’t freak yourself out,” Robin rubbed his back, “we’re going to
figure it out together. Right guys?”

The other two nodded, Max, patting his head, “of course, we’ll be there for you.”

They sat on the disgusting bathroom floor, Mike surrounded by the only family that hadn’t left
him. Maybe they’d go someday too, but for the moment he held them close, trying to forget the
never-ending agony building vines in his chest.

—-------

Monday morning came too quickly, and Mike saw eyes on him as he walked through the halls. His
heart pounded, rings threatening to slip off from the sweat on his hands.

“Mike, ignore it,” Max whispered next to him, “they’re just bored assholes that have nothing better
to do.”

Her words did nothing to help him. Mike felt their whispers engraving into his skin. For years he
had craved attention, for people to actually care about him. This was most definitely not what he
meant. Mike got to his locker and hoped that would end the runway, but he was never that lucky.
“Hey, Wheeler!”

Max sighed, “what the hell do you want Jason?”

“Oh, didn’t realize I was speaking to Wheeler's girlfriend– oh wait no, that can’t be true can it?”

Mike pressed his eyes shut, not daring to say a word as he absent-mindedly gathered his books.
Jason didn’t seem to get the message and took another step forward.

“Come on, I just want to talk alright? Maybe we can get a bite to eat after. Only if your boyfriend is
cool with it though, right?” Jason paused, “where is Byers anyway?”

“Jason, seriously, fuck off–”

Mike cut her off, “it’s fine Max, let’s just go.”

“I’m just having some fun Wheeler, you know how it is. Maybe since you’ve already run him
through, I can get my chance with Will, he’s always been so easy–”

There was an instinct in him, one Mike had become aware of after the knife incident. Without a
thought, he spun around and threw the punch. It was uncoordinated and sloppy, but it did the job.
He felt his rings cut into Jason’s cheek. The jock was too taken back by the action to do anything.

”You piece of shit, don’t say his fucking name, you motherfucking—“ An arm grabbed onto his
own, yanking him back and away from the shocked football player.

“Holy shit!” Max gasped, “Mike, what the hell?”

“Mr. Wheeler!”

His ears were ringing, staring at the blood cascading down Jason’s face. Mike was sure his body
wasn’t his anymore, mind working without permission. With trembling hands, he turned around,
vision blurred from tears.

Principal Anderson walked towards him, a kick in his step. Mike didn’t bother to move, the
digging eyes on him now feeling like nothing more than broken spotlights.

“My office young man, right now.”

Max looked at him nervously, but he couldn’t find it in himself to reassure her. He followed after
the man, the world feeling slow as his hand pulsed.

The office door clicked shut behind him, and Mike stepped forward, slumping down in the seat.

Mike wanted to get ripped into, desperate to feel something other than the utter heartache that
wouldn’t leave him alone.

“Would you like to inform me on why you decided to punch another student?”

“No,” he said dryly, staring just past the man’s head and out the window.

Principal Anderson let out a breath, pulling off his glasses, “well, that is not an acceptable answer.”

“Sorry.”

“Mr. Wheeler, this is not the first scene you have caused, I’m sure you remember Saturday night–”

He stood up swiftly, “I’m leaving.”

“Excuse me? Sit back down–”

Mike felt breathing become more of a task, “I don’t give a shit about the ‘scenes’ I’ve caused–”
“Watch your mouth young man. Sit down while I call your mother.”

He swallowed thickly, still holding the door handle, “she’s busy.”

“Well then, you can explain why I interrupted her day.”

His lips were dry, sealed together by the cracks growing in them. The phone rang, a haunting sound
Mike had stopped listening to. The tears in his eyes were still present, teasing him with every
passing second.

“Hello?”

His heart picked up.

“Mrs. Wheeler, this is your son’s principal. Due to some unfortunate circumstances, I’m going to
have to ask you to come down to the school.”

Mike balled his hands into fists, listening as his mother let out an irritated sigh.

“Is he hurt?”

“No ma’am.”

Mike looked out the window, hoping that if he stopped listening the need to cry would go away.
He just wanted all of it to stop.

“I’ll be there as soon as I can.” With that, she hung up the phone. Mike couldn’t even think of the
last time he saw his mom, it must have been a week or so.

Principal Anderson continued to speak, but Mike hadn’t picked a single word. It felt like he was in
a Charlie Brown special, the teachers sounding like TV static.
When the door swung open, he didn’t bother to move.

“Mrs. Wheeler, thank you so much for coming on such short notice.” Kiss ass.

Mike tensed when he felt the woman sit down next to him. Eyes burned into the side of his head,
but he didn’t dare turn towards her.

“Micheal, what’s going on?” He shrugged, “look at me when I’m speaking to you.”

He glanced at her, “nothing.”

“Oh really? So you called me out of my very busy day for no reason? Your father is not going to be
happy with you when he finds out you were called to the principal’s office.”

Mike stared down at his hands, “sorry.”

“Mrs. Wheeler, your son had an…altercation with another student in the hall this morning, that
coupled with a scene he caused at Homecoming is raising some concern.”

“Homecoming? What happened at Homecoming?” She asked him. Mike bit down on his lower lip,
a tear rolling down his cheek, “Micheal.”

“Nothing, mom,” he said, voice cracking, “nothing happened.”

“Well obviously something happened or I wouldn’t be sitting here, now would I?” She snapped.

Mike pinched his eyes shut, remembering a time where her patience hadn’t been so thin. It hurt to
constantly miss his mom only to want her gone when she was actually there. The mother he wanted
had died three years ago. Maybe he should have cherished that last hug.

“I think it’s better Micheal be taken out of school for the day, he’s a good student so I don’t want
suspension to be on his record, but if this behavior continues I will have no other choice.”

“Of course Principal Anderson, thank you.” She stood, “Micheal, let’s go.”

He dragged himself off the chair, holding his backpack close. The walk to the car was silent,
suffocating in a way he never knew possible. Mike got in after her, keeping his head to the
window.

“Are we not going to talk about it?”

Monday’s never gifted luck.

“No.”

“Micheal, come on. You called me out of work in the middle of the day–”

“I didn’t do shit–”

She cut him off, “watch it, do you really think mouthing off to me is going to get you out of trouble
right now?”

“What are you going to do, ground me? You have to actually be home to enforce that rule,” he
muttered, still not turning to her.

“Mike, what is going on with you?” She paused, waiting for an answer that wasn’t coming, “this
isn’t you, you don’t get in fights at school, and what happened at Homecoming? You’ve gotta talk
to me so I can help–”

“I don’t want your help, nothing happened.” He crossed his arms, “can you turn on the car? It’s
cold.”

“No, and we are not going home until I have something to tell your father.”
Mike felt his bottom lip shaking, unshed tears coming out, “so you don’t actually care you just
want some story to give dad?”

“Micheal–”

“No that’s fine, tell him his son’s a piece of shit, I bet he already knows that. He doesn’t care ,
mom. Do you really think he’ll hear a word you say if you tell him I messed up? He wouldn’t be
surprised.” Mike’s voice cracked, every word being cut out from a jagged knife. “Dad already
knows I’m a fuck up.”

“If you’re going to throw yourself a pity party then we’re not going to get anywhere. You cannot
go around getting in fights with kids at school, that’s what we’re talking about right now. Dad can
‘not care’ all he wants but that’s not going to change the fact that you’re our son, which means it’s
our responsibility to discipline you–”

Mike covered his ears and bent forward, arms shaking. He squeezed his eyes shut, cries bubbling
out with no sign of stopping. It felt as if there was a hand inside his chest, punching him
continuously until it was impossible to breathe.

“J-Just stop , can you just tell me it’s going to be okay? I don’t wanna be disciplined, I want you to
care,” he choked on a cough, “p-please, if you’re going to yell at me then just tell d-dad and make
him do it, I don’t give a shit about him, but I don’t want you to h-hate me, I know he already does,
I know–”

“That is enough Micheal! We do not hate you. You cannot speak about your father like that, I don’t
care if you like him, but you have to show even an ounce of respect, there is absolutely no
difference between us having this conversation–”

Mike sucked in a gasp of air, “i-it is different, it’s different–”

“Why, you tell me why–”

“Because you’re my mom!” His voice cracked, making him feel like the same bullied little boy that
got his hair gelled down every morning. The little boy that had to watch his family drift apart, all
along knowing it was his fault. “H-He never cared about me, you did, I don’t want to hear about
how much I disappoint you. I know I messed up, I k-know you don’t want me anymore, and I’m
sorry I ruined your day, but I can’t do this with you.”

Her eyes had softened, face losing the tense lines they had gained through the years. She let out a
tiny sigh and pulled her sleeve over her hand, Mike’s lips flipped into a frown, more tears spilling
as she wiped his nose. He sat in the same car that used to drive him to school everyday, but now
his knees barely fit, body having outgrown the tiny vehicle. Though, no matter how tall he got,
Mike felt just as childish.

“You’ve always been a snotty crier.”

He let out a watery laugh, completely taken back, “ mom .”

She sent him a sad smile, “sorry.”

After a moment, she turned on the car, warm air splitting out from the vents. It made the undried
tears on his face burn. She didn’t make any move to drive away.

“You’ve gotten so big,” she said, “I didn’t even realize.”

Mike wiped his eyes, “sorry.”

When she laughed, something hollow built inside of him. Mike only then realized he hadn’t heard
that sound in years.

“I remember when you were born you cried the most out of the three of you.”

“Yeah?”

She nodded, “god it was awful, you were loud too, sounded like you were doing it just to spite me.
When you got a little older, At one, you turned into the nicest baby, just laughed and laughed,
called you ‘smiley Mike’. Except if your father was watching you, then you’d scream. It was a fake
cry though, you had an attitude even back then.”
“I don’t have an attitude.”

“Oh yes you do,” she lightly smacked his arm, “it’s not a bad thing. Gives you a spunky
personality.”

“Don’t use that word,” he muttered, face scrunched up.

“What? Spunky?”

He groaned, “I hate the sound of it.”

“Guess it’s not really ‘in’ these days, is it?”

Mike shrugged, “I mean, Robin still uses it.”

“Robin is the…”

His mood suddenly dropped right back down, remembering where he was. Mike turned to his
mom, wondering if she noticed his heart breaking at the simple question.

“Robin, she’s been my friend since before highschool,” he whispered, voice sounding congested.

“She’s in your band?” He nodded, “I’m sorry, I should know that.”

“It’s fine–”

“No, no it’s not.” She crossed her arms, “I’m your mom, I should know that.”

He looked at her, being able to see the tears in her eyes, “mom, don’t cry…”
She waved him off, “I’m sorry, I just– you’re so big now, and I don’t know anything about you.”

“I was always there,” he whispered, voice higher than it usually was. “You could have t-talked to
me.”

Her lips were pressed together in a shattered smile. Mike tried to return it, blinking quickly to hide
the four years worth of tears trying to come out. If he let it all release, he’d turn into a puddle of the
boy he used to be.

“It was never your fault, I need you to understand that, okay?”

“But–”

“It was never your fault. You did nothing wrong. I just…” she trailed off, “I relied too much on
your sister when you two were growing up, putting a lot of pressure on her to watch out for you and
Holly. I was the eldest kid too, I knew what it was like to be ‘mom number two’. I guess I was
guilty that I wasn’t there as much as I should have been. Then she went off to college, barely calls,
and I forget you aren’t all grown too. I never ever wanted you to feel like I didn’t want you, or that
I hate you, never .”

Mike let the tears fall as she cupped his face, “why don’t you ever want to hang out with me? You–
even when you’re home, it’s like I’m not there.”

“I wanted to give you the freedom–”

He cut her off, “I don’t want freedom, I want you to want to be around me.”

No matter how he phrased it, it was nearly impossible to describe the feeling; The feeling of
wishing people would come looking for him even when he was being a nightmare, acting
imperfectly. The desperation to ask for his parents to care about him, only to know if he did that it
would cut a hole in his heart, knowing he had to beg the two people that created him to love him.
Force them to want him. He was meant to just hope for a change that would never come. Mike
knew he didn’t cross their minds as much as they crossed his. Even the strongest people could be
easily crushed by people who gave them life. Having kids was selfish, it was the most selfish thing
in the world.
“Of course I want to be around you.”

Mike sighed, “right.”

“Listen, I won’t tell your father what happened today alright? But when you’re ready, we’re talking
about it.” She brushed her thumb under his eye, “can we agree on that?”

“Yeah, mom.”

“Good.” She pulled him into an awkward side hug, but Mike melted in seconds. Something was
always better than nothing. Telling himself that on a loop might make him believe it.

He closed his eyes, pressing closer to her. Mike didn’t feel like he knew the woman holding him,
but the remains of his mother were still there. The perfume hadn’t changed for eighteen years, it
wasn’t a brand that stores carried anymore and she had to order it every four months. The smell
wasn’t very extreme, so she tended to wear a lot so it would last the whole day. Sometimes he’d
steal some during nights they left him alone and spray it on his blankets, making himself believe
she was still there.

Mike would never admit it aloud, he knew that focusing on a person’s smell might count as odd;
but knowing a loved one’s scent was an unspoken love language for him. His mother smelled like
lavender and a floral bouquet. Robin smelled like apple shampoo and mint gum, Max like cocola
lipgloss, Eddie had a musk of clean leather and hairspray.

Will smelled like rosewood, but only a hint, it was never overpowering. Vanilla was in there, but it
was mixed with a tang of raspberry. Such a clean scent, something easily picked out in a room of
people. For Mike it always had been.

Closing his eyes, the tears hit his lips. Mike secretly wished he’d stolen one of Will’s sweatshirts
before losing him. Maybe then he could still hold onto his imaginary knight in shining armor.

No matter how fake he may be.

 Chapter 29
Chapter Notes

The Gold- Manchester Orchestra & Phoebe Bridgers

The worst part about his life flipping on its head was that nothing else changed. The world didn’t
care that he was slipping away, it didn’t bat an eye. Everything spun as it did before, unaware that
the walls he had built were shattered. It only took seconds.

Will figured he deserved that. Society was a well-oiled machine, no person could be important
enough to stop that. It was almost laughable to even think that Will might be something worth
stopping for. He knew everyone’s life would be easier if he walked right back into the shadow he’d
crawled out of. Creatures locked away in dark places were meant to stay there, they existed to hide.
Animals behind cages were interesting to look at, but having them step into the open with free rein
caused catastrophic endings.

There wasn’t a second that went by where Will didn't regret Mike finding the key to his cage.
Though, no matter how hard he tried, Will couldn’t blame him. It could never be Mike’s fault, he
had poked a sleeping bat, one that seemed harmless, and now Will had ripped apart everyone in his
path.

Days cruised by quickly, and Will barely processed a moment. It felt as if things had stunted, the
lion inching closer to its prey and waiting to attack. Will found himself in front of the mirror,
horrified when he saw his face. The only predator nearby was him.

And he didn’t trust himself.

Jane had spent most of her time outside the house, most likely repulsed by the idea of being close
to him. Will watched behind the window as she disappeared from sight. Chrissy usually picked her
up, and he couldn’t look at the blonde girl, knowing disgust and disappointment would be
swimming on her face. She hadn’t said a word to him since homecoming, which had been a week
ago now.

The others kept their conversations at a surface level, tense words floating between them. Will
knew they wanted to interrogate him, but he was smart enough to run away before they could do
so. For years Will had been trying to hide from any kind of spotlight, and now he was finally
accomplishing that. Maybe he should be happy, at least they all knew what he was. No part of him
deserved their patience, though they gave it to him anyway.

He hated it, and he hated them for caring.

“Will? You ready?”

With a short breath, he pulled away from the mirror. The door wasn’t locked, but it didn’t seem
like Lucas had any interest in opening it.

“Coach wants us out on the field, we’re doing sprints today.”

He glanced to the toilet, seeing vines slithering out of it. They wanted to pull him in, force him to
convulse in pain as if that would ever fix the rolling agony inside of him.

“Yeah, coming,” he muttered, not daring to glance back at the mirror.

Lucas was standing on the other side of the door as he walked out, face pulled into a tight
expression. Disappointment.

“You’ve been hiding out in there a lot.” Lucas picked up step next to him as they walked to the
field. Will merely shrugged, knowing that was a loaded question. “So, are we still not going to–”

“No, we’re not.” Will pushed open the doors, listening to the sigh Lucas let out behind him.

“Byers! On-time from now on, got it?” The coach yelled, whistle hanging from his mouth.

Will nodded, “sorry.”

The eyes followed him, he was never able to catch them, but the feeling was there. Will wanted to
scream and beg them all to leave him alone. The words never left his mouth, he stood there with
practiced precision, hoping every emotion he wanted to lack finally left and never ventured back.
“Alright, we’ve got our last game in two weeks, last year we lost this one, I will not be letting that
happen again. We understand?” The heavy-set man looked around at them.

“Yes, Coach.”

Will’s body moved on autopilot, a personal prison he couldn’t escape from. He saw the bin of
footballs sitting close by, each one laughing at him, knowing he would always lose in the end. As
he stepped by it, Will mentally recoiled, the unhidden person in his brain sprinting to the farthest
corner. On the outside, he graced his fingers over the unmoving object, feeling shocks of nausea
stabbing at him with every brush.

“Byers! Come on!”

Will was a fast runner, that skill had been beaten into him. It was easy to move quickly when there
was something to get away from. Will had a constant hurricane chasing him down. It hadn’t caught
him yet, but he felt himself slowing down. He was exhausted, knees weak, unable to keep him
going for much longer.

As practice rolled to an end, Will had his lips tied together. His stomach poked at him, reminding
him that he needed to get out. It didn’t matter what he did anymore, it was a routine he couldn’t
fight off. The feeling of each football holding a virus only he could catch. Their coach was
explaining something, but Will couldn’t process his words, swallowing quickly to keep himself
from collapsing onto the grass and letting everyone in on his secret.

Will was unable to get far when they were finally released. He turned around only for a voice to
pull him right back.

“Hey, can we talk?” Lucas gently grabbed his arm, stopping him from walking toward the locker
rooms. Or in Will’s case, right back to the awaiting vines.

“What is it?” He asked, crossing his arms and holding onto them tightly. Lucas cleared his throat
and glanced around at the emptying field.

“So, Steve, Dustin, and I are going to one of their gigs tonight,” he said, eyes digging into Will’s
own.
He bit on his cheek, trying to stop the sweat, “um, okay, I uh–”

“We want you to come.”

Will looked to the grass, “yeah, I don’t think that’s a great idea. Thanks though. Look, I’m gonna
go–”

“What do I have to do to get you to talk to me?” Lucas pressed, the composure leaving him in
seconds.

“I don’t know what you mean, there’s nothing to talk about.”

Lucas let out a breath, “Okay, you know that’s not true. Jane won’t talk to you, Chrissy barely even
looks at you. Max thinks you're some kind of devil and she won’t listen to me. Eddie and Robin
leave whenever you’re even mentioned and Mike–”

“I don’t want to talk about him,” he said flatly, Lucas’ words soaking into his skin.

“Alright, then what do you want to talk about? Because acting like nothing is wrong doesn’t work
anymore. I’m here, okay?” Lucas, took a step closer, “I’m right here, I just need you to talk to me.”

“You heard what happened, I don’t know what you’re hoping to get from me–”

“Are you kidding me?” Lucas ran a hand over his face, “what I’m hoping to get from you is the
entire fucking story. What were you thinking? This isn’t you, Will–”

“Then what is me?” He pressed, “what am I like?”

Lucas tightened his jaw, “the Will Byers I know would never do something like this.”

“Then I don’t think you know me very well.”

“Yes, I do! And I know you’re guilty, do you think I’m blind? We can fix this, you just need to tell
me what’s up and– I don’t know, and I’ll talk to them, I'll tell them that you didn’t mean it. We’re
all friends, and I don’t want to lose you over a mistake.”

Will stared at his friend, feeling a hand around his throat tighten. It was a threat, reminding him to
keep his mouth shut. Mike had given him the key back and now the locks were unrecognizable.

“I don’t know what you want from me. Whatever Mi– whatever he told you, was what happened.
It wasn’t a mistake, I did it on purpose and I hurt both of them on purpose. There’s nothing I can
do to fix that alright? You don’t have to feel bad for me, I’m sorry I wasn’t the person you thought
I was,” he said firmly, wishing even the smallest hint of emotion slipped through.

“God, who are you?” Lucas said, now inching back as if Will was a wild animal, “you’re my best
friend, you always have been and I fought all of them trying to keep you on this fucking pedestal I
built, I don’t know why, I just…I thought I got you, but purposefully leading someone on and then
hurting Jane like that? Will, you're not that kind of person.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Yes, come on, just– come on , Will, you’re sorry for what? Tell me,” Lucas begged, “I’m here, all
you have to do is talk to me.”

“I…” he trailed off, feeling everything get stuck, “I don’t– I’m sorry I made this hard for you, but
don’t worry about ‘defending’ my name or anything. It’s just a waste of your time. I’m fine, and
it’s better to just…to just leave this, I can’t fix it and me going anywhere near those guys is going
to make your life harder.”

“I don’t care if it makes my life harder, are you not listening to me? You’re my friend, we’ve been
friends since elementary school. I don’t believe you created a whole scheme to hurt Jane and
Mike–”

“It really doesn’t matter if I did it on purpose. It doesn’t fucking matter because I still did it and
that’s not going to change. So just stop, okay?” Will memorized his script, it was ingrained in his
brain at this point.

He had to look away when he saw Lucas’ face. There was only so much one person could take, and
watching every person in his life realize was he truly was felt like torture. They expected him to be
a certain way, which wasn't surprising since Will built up the perfect persona. He was supposed to
be the nice one, the one that no one ever had to worry about; And now he had completely gutted
every person in the immediate vicinity.

“Fine,” Lucas finally said, “I tried.”

“You didn’t need to.”

Lucas let out a sad laugh, head bending to the ground, “it’s like talking to a fucking wall.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, whatever man.” Lucas walked past him, bumping their shoulders together. Will couldn’t
bare to turn around and watch his final shot leave his sight. It had been right there, the perfect
opening. Will had taken that chance and burned it in seconds.

He tried to swallow the lump in his throat, saliva dripping in his mouth. Will kept his lips pushed
together and swiftly walked to the bathroom, the addicting need overcoming him. He fumbled for
the door, the toilet coming into view and welcoming him. Will fumbled to his knees, a dry heave
falling out before he had time to process it.

His stomach burned, it always did. Will’s knuckles turned white as he gripped the edge of the
toilet, trying to keep himself from falling. Barely any food was there since Will couldn’t find much
enjoyment in eating. It was stomach acid that made his eyes water with agony. The feeling was
never-ending, his body tightening up as he struggled to breathe.

That’s how he should feel, it was the only reassurance that he’d done a good job. A good job at
something that would never cease to give him nightmares.

When it finally ended, he didn’t move. Couldn’t find it in himself too. This time no one came to the
door. Ever so slowly Will had pushed them away, receiving a freedom he never wanted. It would
be easy to blame someone, and find a villain in his story; But as he searched, Will kept going back
to the same mirror, staring at the person who continued to hurt him over again. No matter how
much he wished the mirror would change, its picture never did.
Friday nights used to be somewhat enjoyable, it was a time when he didn’t have to think. Usually
one of his friends was dragging him around somewhere, but this time there was only silence. Will
walked through the halls, vision swimming as he did so. Most students were gone, having
evacuated from the school hours ago.

The air outside was cold, the summer months finally ending. He held his sweatshirt close,
fumbling to grab his keys. The parking lot was empty, with only one other car there. Will slipped
inside, shivering as he did so. The sky was getting ready to come down and Will wanted to go
home and hide away, sleep always gifted him a moment of peace.

He should have known it wouldn’t work. Shoving the keys in, Will listened as the engine spit,
desperately trying to come to life. Nothing happened.

“Fuck!” He cursed, trying again, vines taking up more space in his lungs. Will tried over and over
until the moving piece of garbage didn’t even make a sound. “Come on, just come on.”

He begged the steering wheel as if that would do anything before throwing the keys onto the
ground. Maybe it was a stupid thing to be upset over, but Will couldn’t stop the tears even with that
thought. The silence was deafening as shaking cries crawled from his throat.

"N-no, I'm just-- my car won't start."

"Yeah, I got that."

Will huffed, "if you're going to just mock me--"

"Would you like some help?" Mike asked, his voice so soft and causing Will's stomach to do a little
flip. He raised his eyes, locking onto the deep brown ones staring at him.

Will glanced towards the window, but he was only met with darkness and an empty parking lot. He
clenched his eyes shut, bottom lip shaking. Pulling his knees up, he pressed against the chair,
already feeling the cold seeping into him. It was funny to think about the first time they met, at the
time Will had believed Mike was some kind of car genius, but now he knew that was a ruse and
completely untrue. Mike just had the basic skill of jumping unmoving vehicles. A tiny smile fell
onto his lips, it was hard not to miss Mike. Not to miss hearing his name and being able to say it
the way he wanted to.
“Alright Byers, I'll see you around."

He glanced down, "yeah, probably not..."

Mike cleared his throat and stepped away, "right, probably not."

If he could go back, Will might have studied Mike’s face a little harder. The first glance was
always the fakest one, but there was such a beauty to it as well. Maybe that was the moment he
started falling in love with Mike Wheeler; maybe it was that same moment where Will began
breaking him as well.

Tears fell down, tumbling over his lips, tracing them as a marker would. It was messy and childish,
but filled with raw truth.

"Up to us then?" Will asked, voice being pushed out with one breath.

"Oh, but of course it is, Mr. Byers," Mike said with a horribly mocking British accent. A laugh
spilled past Will's lips, a smile so wide that it almost burned his cheeks.

"That was horrible," he exclaimed.

Mike wiggled his brows, "you sound like you like it, shall I keep going?"

Will should have told him how happy it made him. He should have let Mike know that he
appreciated every bit of him. Now it was too late and Will lost one of the most precious things he’s
ever been allowed to touch. It was contamination, he’d taken something so breakable and perfect
only to slowly pick away at it. Mike used to glow, a smile never absent when they were with one
another.

Mike took a step closer, “I’m done with you, I-I don’t want to see you, I don’t want anything to do
with you. I’m done…with whatever this was. You mean nothing to me.”

“Mike–”
“Don’t say my fucking name.”

Will let out a whispered sob, bringing a hand up to cover his mouth. He saw the pain he caused and
let it happen, he was a coward. A pathetic coward that got a sight of gold and found a way to smear
it. Now, he saw the oozing black consuming Mike’s once pure color, a reminder that Will had
ruined the most beautiful person in his life. The worst part was how easy it was.

Will knew that the true worst part of it all was that Mike would never know how in love Will was
with him. Mike wouldn’t know that Will would let his world become nothing but dust only to see
him smile again. Selfishly, Will wanted that smile directed at him, to feel Mike look at him one
more time. To believe he loved Will just one more time, even if it could never be real.

“I love you…” Mike spoke, voice trembling against his swollen lips. The timer finally snapped,

looming over his head. He froze .

“I love you,” Will said to himself, speaking out into the dark night. He was too late, Mike was
gone.

He sniffed, laying his head against the window. Will fumbled with his phone, acutely aware he had
no one to call. Eventually, he’d have to get up and walk home, but the idea of that made his bones
hurt. So, he’d sit there, and maybe if he did that long enough time would turn back. He’d be able to
look to the side and see Mike’s goofy smile looking back at him, waiting to have their very first
conversation.

Maybe if he got to do it again, he’d do it right; but Will didn’t trust himself, he never has. He never
would. No matter what universe he landed in, the outcome would be the same because Will was
smart enough to make it that way. He’d be alone, he was always meant to lose Mike.

Eventually, Will pulled himself out of the car, shivering as the wind hit him. He thought about
what everyone else was doing and felt a twinge of jealousy hit him. The sound of Mike’s voice was
getting harder to remember, it was muffled and unclear. A terrifying fact.

As he walked down the sidewalk, Will realized he’d use his time machine to go back and ask what
Mike’s favorite song is. He never found out, and maybe while Mike drifted away from his life,
he’d be able to save that small piece of him. Will had nothing but the tainted memories now.
—-------

The house was cold, no one having been there all day. Will was trembling as he stepped inside,
hands on the verge of turning blue.

“Mom?” He called out for good measure, but he knew she wouldn’t be there.

With a sigh, he tossed his keys down and locked the door, flipping on a few lights. Glancing at the
thermostat, he itched to turn it up, but reminded himself his freezing state wasn’t an excuse to up
their bill.

Not living close to the school meant he had walked for almost two hours, having to stop a few
times as his vision blurred. Running around, puking, and not eating didn’t give him the best
energy. Not that he really wanted any.

Will pulled on warmer clothes and sat himself down in the living room, staring at the remote but
making no move to turn anything on. There was mostly silence, only the washer moving in the
basement could be heard.

Just as he began falling asleep, his phone went off. He felt confusion overtake him and looked
down, stomach dropping and fluttering at the same time, reminding him of some uncoordinated
screenshot.

Mike.

“Hello?” He asked, picking up after the second ring. Immediately he was met with an entourage of
sounds. Music was blaring in the back, muffled talking coming up as well.

“Hey!” Mike yelled, his voice obviously slurred.

“Is…everything okay–”

“No, I don’t want to hear you talk, I called so I could talk,” his words were hard to make out, “just
wanted to remind you that I am so much better without you a-and I don’t need you at all you
asshole–”

Another voice cut in, “Mike, give me the phone, I told you to just block him so you wouldn’t do
stupid shit–”

“No Max! I’m not done.” Mike turned back to the phone, “I can do so much better ya know? I can ,
I don’t even know why I liked you, you’re not nice to me a-and…”

Mike trailed off, obviously in thought. Will wanted to pull the phone away and hang up, but he sat
frozen, tears rolling down his cheeks. He stared at the blank TV, eyes a void.

Familiar voices came back, talking behind Mike.

“What is he doing?” Eddie said.

“He got piss drunk and called Byers,” Max’s voice was louder, obviously closer to the phone,
“Mike, give it to me, we are blocking the number you’re done–”

“N-No I’ve gotta finish,” Mike audibly swallowed, “and I hate you, I-I hate you and everything
about you and I hate you.”

Even though Mike sounded on the verge of passing out, each word slurred together like cursive,
Will felt the stab of the sentence. He let out a shaky breath, hand struggling to keep the phone up.
Music was pounding in his ear as well as Max and Eddie’s yelling, but none of it processed.

Mike hated him, he said the word over and over again just so Will could understand.

“Okay,” he whispered, eventually hearing Max wrestle the phone away and end the call. Silence
came back and Will pressed his eyes shut.

He slowly laid down, tears still moving but no sound left him. It felt like the end, he knew he lost
Mike, but hearing such harsh things come from the singer’s mouth was the same as glass taking up
space in his arm, an unhealing scar.
Drunk words are sober thoughts. That made him want to throw up, he had made someone who
used to look at him with such care despise him. Mike hated him.

—-------

For the entire weekend, Will didn’t speak to anyone, not bothering to leave the house once. There
wasn’t anywhere for him to go. He laid in bed, Mike’s words on a loop in his mind. It didn’t matter
how many times he thought about them, it hurt every time.

Monday came, and Will was shaking with nerves. He knew it was a bad idea, but he had to know if
Mike meant it. After Friday he hadn’t received another call or message, a secret part of him hoped
Mike would take it back. It was coming up two weeks since they broke up, and Will didn’t know
what to expect as he walked towards Mike’s locker.

Will had his arms crossed, squeezed so tightly it almost hurt. Mike’s locker was open, so the other
boy hadn’t seen him quite yet. After a second, Will cleared his throat.

“Hey, I uh–”

Mike slammed his locker shut. Will flinched back, eyes closing, it was loud enough to gain them
some stares. He glanced up, stomach turning to ice as unmoving brown eyes met his. Mike had
never looked at him like that, so cutting and dry, complete disinterest in whatever conversation
they were about to have. Mike’s stance was strong, expression pulled into a tight line. He was
done, that was blatantly obvious. Will felt unsteady, nails digging into his arm.

“Sorry um, you…you called me on Friday night,” he said, desperately hoping Mike would finish
the rest. Unfortunately, he wasn’t given that. Mike raised his brow, but said nothing, “I know you
were drunk, so I just wanted to ask if you meant all of that.”

Will didn’t know who he was looking at anymore, the boy standing in front of him wasn’t the
Mike he’d grown accustomed to. He was angry, visibly losing any bit of care for Will.

“Was it mean?”
“What?” He breathed out.

“It really depends on what I said to you,” Mike leaned against his locker, “so, was it mean?”

“I…” He swallowed, glancing around the hall, “I guess–”

“Then yes I meant it.”

The dagger in his chest did a spin, pushing deeper. Mike had his hand on it, flicking the sharp
object for good measure. Will felt tears blur in his eyes and blinked quickly, looking off to the
side.

“Oh.”

“I don’t want to talk to you, okay? So just leave me alone, whatever the fuck I said drunk isn’t
important,” Mike snapped.

Will nodded, “right, I just wanted to know.”

“Well I asked you to do one thing and you couldn’t even listen to me, and now I have to–” Mike
cut himself off with a short breath, “doesn’t matter. We’re done, everything is done .”

“I know that, I wasn’t trying to–”

“I don’t care what you were trying–”

Will felt irritation bubble up, “would you just let me speak for a second?”

“Don’t know if it’s unclear Byers, but I don’t have any interest in what you have to say. Unless
you’re going to tell me how useless I am to you for a second time, is that it?” Mike pressed,
crossing his arms and mocking Will’s stance.
“I never said that.”

Mike let out a dry laugh, “you miswell have, and it doesn’t even fucking matter, you broke up with
me–”

“I didn’t–”

“Then I did! It doesn’t matter , nothing that happened between us was real, and I’m done with it.”
Mike sighed, “just let me get over you.”

“Fine,” he said, lowering his voice as eyes trained on them.

Mike scoffed, “yeah, fine. Now just stay away from me, I don’t want to talk to you now or ever
again, got it?”

Their eyes locked for a moment, and Will didn’t say anything. Mike’s brows slowly flinched
together, a look Will knew too well. He said goodbye to it one more time, if Mike wanted him to
go away that’s what he’d do. With that thought in mind he nodded, turning around and walking
away from the person he was desperately in love with.

Only one tear got out.

—-------

Will got out of practice for the day, knowing he couldn’t handle that. He’d deal with the backlash
later. Currently, he sat in his room, back leaned against the wall as he faced the door. Doing
schoolwork was getting harder with each passing day, but failing out would just make his mom’s
life harder, and that reminder kept him going.

She was there when he got home, and it was a breath of fresh air. His mom was the only one not
treating him differently, obviously she had questions, but Will was grateful she never pushed. It
was comforting to hear her bang around the kitchen as he studied, giving him a sense of
familiarity.
The doorbell rang. Will thought nothing of it, there was no reason to. Not until he heard what
sounded like a nightmare coming to life. The words on the book below him started blurring.

“No! You are not coming in this house, are you kidding me? My kids–”

“ Our kids, Joyce, they’re our kids.”

Will felt his book drop. It seems he got his time machine after all.

“They have never been yours, and you– the nerve you have to come back here after leaving us with
nothing .”

“I just need a place to crash for a few nights, got into some shit. I’m sober alright? It’s just a few
days, look I’m sorry.”

His mom sighed, “you can stay till Thursday, you understand? That is it .”

Will stared at the door handle, heart racing. The shattered pieces looked right back at him. The
inanimate object got into his head, finally taking its rightful seat.

The broken lock smiled at him.

 Chapter 30
Chapter Notes

TW: Mental and physical abuse. PLEASE be cautious when reading. If you do not
wish to read this chapter, feel free to comment and I will give you an undetailed
summary so you are ready for the next chapter. My goal is to make everyone feel safe
here, never be afraid to ask.

When It's Cold I'd Like To Die- Moby

“What are you talking about? You really couldn’t have just said no?”

“Jane, can we just not do this right now–”

“No! Is Will okay with this?”

With his name mentioned, he stepped out of his room, knowing it was useless to hide. They had
been going at it for twenty minutes now. Jane turned to look at him as he walked into the kitchen.

“What do you have to say about this?”

“It’s fine–”

She waved him off, “don’t listen to anything he says, it’s like talking to a cardboard box. It’s not
fine, nothing about this is fine, mom.”

Will crossed his arms, not bothering to say anything else. It was the first time in a week Jane had
even bothered to address him. He felt envious of her, wishing he had the same confidence to stand
there and say how he truly felt. It had only been a day since their dad came back, and it was the
first time the man left the house. Meaning, Jane was using that time to blow up. Not that Will could
blame her.

“It’s only for another few days, then he’s out of here. I’m sorry, he was going to keep pushing–”
“Then let him push! Just say no! God, is that a thing between you two? You just let people walk all
over you?”

“Jane, that’s enough,” their mom said, her eyes widened with warning.

“I don’t want to stay here.” Jane crossed her arms, a fiery look on her face.

“That’s okay, we could get a hotel–”

“Mom, we don’t have the money for that,” Will cut in, speaking a full sentence for the first time.
Jane didn’t even look at him.

“Alright, why don’t you two stay with Chrissy? Or Will you could go over to Lucas’ or Mike’s
maybe?” Jane let out a scoff, eyes trained forward. Will glanced at her, but kept his mouth tied
shut. “Okay, is something going on with you two?”

“No, everything is fine,” Will said.

“I’ll stay at Chrissy’s or something.”

“Will?” Their mom pressed.

He shrugged, “I’ll stay with you, it’s fine.”

“I’m sorry, I really am, I know I shouldn’t have–” the phone rang, and the woman let out an
irritated sigh, “we can talk more about this later, okay?”

She picked it up and started speaking quietly, signaling the end of their conversation. Will bent his
head and turned around. He was only in his room for a few seconds before the door was flying
open.
Jane stood there, face red, “what the fuck was that?”

“What do you mean?” He muttered.

“After everything you’re just okay with this? I thought you’d back me up.”

“I–”

She ignored that, “which was probably stupid since you don’t do that anymore.”

“What did you want me to do Jane? Make it all worse for mom?”

Jane closed the door, fumbling with the lock, “that’s not what I’m saying and you know that. All
he’s been doing is laying on our couch and you really think he’s going to get up and leave on
Thursday?”

“I don’t know, Jane, I didn’t really think about it.” Will kept his eyes on her hand, desperately
hoping she didn’t make anything worse. The last thing he needed was his doorknob snapping off.

“And are we still not going to talk about the other thing?”

“What other thing?” He muttered, fully aware of what she was bringing up.

Jane huffed, “I was waiting for you to come and talk to me about it, but you didn’t. You know,
when you hurt someone you’re supposed to chase after them and beg for forgiveness.”

“You told me to leave you alone.”

“Yeah, and that means let me be for a few days and then tell me how sorry you are and how much
you didn’t mean it–”

He cut her off, “okay, what is it you think I didn’t mean?”

“Well all of it, I guess.”

Will nodded, “I don’t think I can give you what you want then.”

“What?”

“You told me you don’t want me to lie, so I’m not lying to you.”

She let out a dry laugh, “so, you meant to hurt me? You meant to hurt Mike and break his fucking
heart, is that what you’re saying? You don’t think I’ve– no, that we’ve all seen what you did to
him? So you’re saying you did all of that on purpose?”

“I never meant on purpose–”

“That’s literally what you just said!”

Will bit at his cheek, “I can’t take any of it back, that’s all I’m saying, so it’s not worth it to beg for
forgiveness that I’m never going to get.”

She was quiet for a moment, boring her eyes into the side of his head. Will sat unmoving, not
wanting to hear what else she had to say.

“You give up really easily, you know that?”

A pathetic coward.

“I know,” he said softly.

Jane dropped her arms, “fine, you know what? Stay here, I don’t fucking care what you do
anymore. Bye.”
Will was unable to get another word out. Jane left, slamming the door behind her. Though, he
couldn’t care about that in the moment as he watched his loose doorknob fall off. It hit the carpet,
barely making a sound, but Will had to cover his ears. He was frozen, completely overtaken with
horror as he stared at the small hole in the wood. It shouldn’t have meant anything, and maybe to
anyone else it wouldn’t. It would be a frustration to them, but Will felt like he’d just lost something
within himself.

He rushed forward and grabbed the old handle, searching for the rusted screws. There was no
fixing it, that was obvious enough, it was barely usable in the first place.

“Shit,” he cursed to himself, hands shaking. The lock on the handle twisted around, reminding him
of a broken clock. It was shattered, completely trashed. Will watched as his door was unable to
click into place, drifting open with no restraints to stop it.

Peering into the empty hall, Will felt naked, finally exposed with nowhere to hide. Though, the
shields he held had never been very stable. Will tossed the handle to the side, not wanting to look
at it any longer.

The sound of a car engine burned into his ears, the front door swinging open. Will couldn’t tell if it
was Jane leaving or their dad coming back. Either way, it made him sick.

“Lonnie, I told you not to bring that shit in here–”

“I’ll open a damn window, calm down.”

Will let his eyes fall shut, rug digging into his knees as he refused to stand up. Footsteps moved
closer and he was powerless to stop them. He kept his gaze narrowed downward. A knock came ,
but it was useless as the unhelpful opening squeaked open. It was a menacing sound, horrifying in
a way he’d never be able to explain.

“What happened here, kid?”

“Nothing.” Will stood to his feet, taking time to wipe his pants down. There was nothing there, but
it was an easy distraction.
“Your sister leave?”

“I don’t know.”

His dad sighed, “your room hasn’t changed much, don’t got any trophies to show me?”

“I uh, I usually just let the other guys take them.”

Will fought the urge to flinch as his dad patted his shoulder, “you see, that’s a good captain, builds
trust. You excited for the game next Friday?”

It all felt too domestic. He finally looked up, feeling like a child under his dad’s eyes. There was
nothing there, no warmth behind his stare. Will used to spend hours searching for something,
desperate to find some worth in himself.

There was never anything there.

“Yeah, guess so.”

His dad nodded slowly, walking around his room with a cigarette still in hand. There was no
beauty to it. When Mike smoked, which was rarely ever, he looked like a painting, one only the
elites would ever be able to lay eyes on. His dad just looked like a sick bum, which was off-
putting.

“We had some good times in here.” The man ran a hand over his desk, poking at the slightly
deflated football. “See you gave up on the artist thing finally?”

Will quickly glanced to his bed, making sure the sketch book was still hidden, “yeah.”

“I’m proud of ya, you know that? You’ve grown.”

I hate myself
He walked back over, eyes scanning over Will’s body, “could be taller though.”

“Sorry,” he whispered, itching to get out of there and huddle under his mother’s arm.

“Must get it from your mother.” His dad hit his back, “well, guess I’ll leave you to it. Maybe we
can go out and throw ball later, wanna see how you improved.”

“Okay,” he said, voice unmoving. Will watched as his father left, dry tears in his eyes. They
wouldn’t fall, not now. The door continued to swing, mocking him. It was like it knew he’d do
anything to shut it.

“Will, can you come help me with dinner? Jane left.” His mom yelled from the kitchen.

He moved with stiff muscles. The time warp slipping him into insanity.

—-------

Will wanted to find someone to blame. He figured that was a human instinct, to try and find some
way to be the victim. It was easier that way, he craved the idea of being hurt and having people
groveling at his feet to apologize. That would have been better, so much easier. Maybe then he
wouldn’t be so alone.

Unfortunately, that wasn’t the fate he held. Thursday had passed, and as Jane had guessed, their
dad made no move to leave. Will couldn’t sleep, it was foolish to even think about the idea. The
light from the hallway always glowed into his room, creeping in farther with each passing night.
He kept himself alert, making sure the books he’d stacked against the door never moved. His
shield was cracking. It was seconds away from being broken down.

He walked through the halls at school, feeling as if he wasn’t in his body. People moved by him,
not offering him a word as they were stuck in their own bubbles. Sometimes he’d hear one of his
friends laughing, and envy would hit him. It was better without him there, he’d always know that,
but the proof was suffocating.

The other day he saw Mike smile.

It was such a pretty smile, Will liked it quite a bit. He only allowed himself to stare for a second,
but it was enough to commit the image to memory. Maybe soon he’d find time to draw it. One last
smile to keep Mike close.

“--and I said I don’t want to.”

“Mike, it’ll be good to get out, and he’s super nice–”

Will slowed his steps as he walked by the cafeteria. He didn’t have to look over to know who was
speaking.

“Fine, give me his number, but I’m not promising anything.”

He pressed his lips together, eyes casting to the floor. Will didn’t stay for another moment and
continued away from the crowd. He’d taken to eating his lunch in the library now, it was lonely,
but better then sitting in a crowded room where no one would look at him.

Will should be happy, he wanted Mike to move on and find someone who deserves him. Sadly, he
hated the idea. Maybe it was jealousy, but when he dug down, there was just a pit. Sadness erupted
in him. It felt like years ago now, but the memories were crisp, the memories of having Mike by
his side. It did him more good than he’d ever be able to admit. Will had taken someone that
brought him joy and single-handedly crushed them, breaking every piece until it was
unrecognizable. He was aware of that. Will was logical that nothing would ever be the same, but
that didn’t stop the daydreams.

When Will got home that day, he only had an hour or so before needing to go to practice. For the
first time in his life, he was excited to get out onto the field, even if that meant he’d spend his
whole night in agony. The house was uncomfortably silent, and it felt like the moment before a
tidal wave.

Will tossed his backpack down, not caring as it hit his foot. Usually, Jane would immediately go to
the TV and turn something on, but now there wasn’t even a ghost of her. She hadn’t spoken to him
since she left, and Will thought about going up to her, but realized he’d make everything worse.
That seemed to be his only talent at the moment.

Moving to his room, he changed into a pair of sweatpants and a blue T-shirt, not bothering with a
jacket. He was about to walk back to the kitchen when the front door swung open. Will knew it
wasn’t his mom, after years of living together he had studied her way of entering. It most definitely
wasn’t Jane.

His stomach dropped.

“Why the hell is there a bag in front of the door!”

Will glanced at the mirror, almost positive he’d find a small kid staring back at him; There was
nothing there but his hollow eyes, child-like glow now long gone.

“Sorry,” he said, trying to stay calm as he walked back into the living room.

“I thought your sister was the one who left her shit all over the place,” his dad said, practically
stumbling into the kitchen. Will had a sharp eye, a skill developed at the ripe age of eight.

In seconds he caught sight of the two cases of glass bottles, holding a liquid that haunted Will’s
dreams. He stood frozen, trying to keep his heart rate down.

“You said you stopped drinking,” he whispered.

“If you’re going to talk, speak up–”

“I thought you stopped drinking, mom said–”

He was cut off, “I don’t give a shit what your mother said. You know how hard it is to get a
fucking job around here?”

“I–”

“No of course not, you’re an ungrateful fucking brat, that’s what you’ve always been. I gave you
everything as a kid, every fucking skill to get you going in life.” His dad walked closer, finger
pointed.
Will stepped back, “you left.”

“What did you say?”

“I-I said,” he swallowed thickly, not meeting his father’s eye, “I said that you left, it’s not my
fault–”

Will’s head flung to the side and he was sure it pinched his neck. The feeling was so familiar, one
he hoped to never feel again. That was naive, and as he stood there with an aching cheek, he
realized no matter how hard he tried, he’d always be pulled right back to his grave.

“Watch your fucking mouth, you understand?”

Slowly, he turned his head back, looking at the hand that had just smacked him; And for the first
time in his life, rage began to fill him. Years of trying to be nothing but a doll, a doormat that
people could walk over meant nothing. He meant nothing as he stood in front of the person who
took everything from him. He wanted a person to blame, now he found one.

“No.”

“Excuse me?” His dad asked, words slurring.

Will pressed his hand into a fist, “you walked back in here to fucking slum on our couch, don’t act
like you ever did anything for me!”

“You don’t know what it’s like to be a parent!”

He let out a choked laugh, “neither do you! What, do you think forcing me to play football a-and
beating the living shit out of me bonded us? You were never here! ”

“I did what needed to be done as your father, I did my fucking job! You’re a disappointment–”
“I don’t care! I don’t care what you think, I don’t care . You’re not my dad, all you do is sit on
your ass and drink, of course you’re not going to get a fucking job–”

Will gasped as a hand wrapped around his throat. It was clammy, but tight enough to cut off his
ability to comfortably breathe. He flinched, back pressed against the fridge. His father’s teeth were
barred, eyes narrowed in a way Will had only seen once before.

“Don’t have a lot to say now, huh?” Will clawed at the hand, “Answer me!”

“L-Let go,” he begged, trying to get his arms to move.

“You will never be anything but the fucking baby your mother raised, you get that? You think you
can get in my face and yell at me?” His head was slammed back, “I tried with you, I really did,
your sister was useless the second she was born–”

That was enough to get his fist to wind back. Will swung it up, and with his last bit of strength
knocked the man back, watching blood explode from his nose. Will was shaking in terror, but felt a
sense of pride within himself.

His father spit on the floor before shakily grabbing his opened beer bottle. A cheshire smile split
onto the man’s face as he stumbled back over. Will stared at the glass, already being able to smell
the stench of alcohol.

“Tried one of these yet, son?”

“G-Go away–” Will tried to run, but was stopped by a hand grabbing him.

“Come on, best time to try it is with your old man, right? Just one more time.”

His dad knew, it was impossible not to. He had given Will the fear in the first place.

Will pressed further against the wall, trying to hide away from his impending doom. He
remembered the first time he was mocked with the bottle, he was just starting seventh grade and
his mom and Jane had been at the store. It was the first and last time he ever tried alcohol.
“You’re still a fucking baby, can’t take a sip of beer and you think I’d be scared of you? You’re
pathetic.”

He let out a whimper, “let me go.”

“Drink it!”

Will let out a dry sob, trying to shake out of the man’s hold. The glass was pressed against his
cheek, his father’s breath ghosting over his face as Will tried not to throw up.

“Do it, drink the whole fucking thing and then try and hit me, do it!”

He shook his head quickly, “p-please, please let me go, let me go! Let me g-go…you’re a f-
fucking monster.”

“Yeah? Where do you think you learned it from?” His dad whispered, lips pressed against his ear.
Will pinched his eyes shut, tears rolling down as his body convulsed with sobs.

“I hate you, I h-hate you.”

“Oh you hate me?” The man took a long drink, hand squeezing Will’s right arm, “you fucking hate
me! You hate me, you piece of shit!”

The drink was smashed to the floor, a few pieces of glass flying up. Will flinched as his father took
a step back. Will noticed how the man’s face was red, eyes moving around wildly. It was useless,
he scolded himself for trying to fight back. It was a battle he was always meant to lose.

“You’re gonna fuckin’ regret opening your mouth,” his dad pointed at him accusadly. Will was
trying to catch his breath, limbs shaking.

“J-Just get out of here, mom–”

Will should have kept his mouth shut.

The second bottle smashed against the wall, directly next to his right side.

His right arm.

Next to his right arm, it hit next to his right arm. It didn’t stop, Will covered his face quickly,
letting out a scream of horror as the sound of shattering glass overtook him. It was never-ending,
and for a moment everything slowed. Will always wondered what people meant when they said
something was ‘their own personal hell’ but now he was sure he found his. When the sound finally
stopped, the ringing in his ears filled the room.

“You wasted all my fucking beer, you know how expensive that is?” His dad marched over and
grabbed his face, “you gonna apologize?”

Will swallowed, snot running down his nose as his tears burned.

He had his dad’s eyes.

“Let me g-go,” he said softly, voice barely audible.

His father’s lips screwed into a line, and Will couldn’t catch his footing before he was thrown onto
the ground. His right arm breaking his fall.

Right arm, Will fell onto his right arm. His right arm that was his only escape, the one thing that let
him create the pictures in his mind. His right arm.

Maybe he should have screamed, that’s always what happened in the movies; But there was not a
sound other than a tiny gasp.

“Oh god…” his dad whispered, voice filled with pure shock.

Will's mouth was trembling, something white hot coursing through his body.
“Dad…” he said, eyes still trained upwards. The man almost lost his step as he walked backwards,
“d-dad, dad what…”

“I’m sorry,” His father shook his head, hurrying to grab his keys, “I’m so sorry.”

“Dad!” Will croaked out, listening as the front door slammed shut; And he was alone, the house
finding its silence once again.

Trying to take in a full breath, he didn’t dare move, attempting to find some kind of center. Will
laid on his back, eyes going in and out of focus as he looked up at the light. Ever so slowly, he
drifted his gaze downwards, and then reality finally struck.

Blood.

Will swallowed, mouth going dry. It was fascinating, his once pale skin not visible now. The glass
he had been trying to run from his whole life stuck to him, finally finding its rightful place in his
life.

“S-Shit,” he gasped, placing his left hand down and scooting up against the wall, letting out a
pained shriek as he went. There was not a place on his arm uncovered, and Will felt every single
shard that might kill him. It was over if they went farther in and if he pulled them out.

His mind was foggy, and Will weakly reached for his phone. Help, he needed help. It got smudged
with blood in seconds.

The room felt off, everything was wrong and it was nearly impossible to think logically. He
clicked on the first name he could think of.

Lucas.

It rang, each ring haunting his slipping mind.

“Hey this is Lucas, so sorry I couldn’t pick up–”

Jane.

It only rang twice.

“Sorry! Couldn’t get the phone right now, just leave me a message–”

Chrissy.

“This is Chrissy! I’m probably calling you back right now–”

Steve.

“You should have texted me–”

Dustin.

“Try me at my usual business hours–”

Max.

“If you actually need something just leave a voicemail–”

Robin.

“Hey! I’ll get back to you by the end of the day, or if the day is already over, or if it’s the middle of
the night I might–”
Eddie.

“I’m not a calling person, so next time go straight to voicemail–”

He tried his mom, desperate to hear her soothing voice.

“This is Joyce! I will get back to you right away–”

Will wished to take a full breath, but it was useless. He fell back against the wall, staring down as
his pants and shirt began to stain. Blood. Too much blood.

When he was younger, he’d had dreams about falling, it was something everyone went through, he
found that out after a conversation with Jane; But Will felt like he was different. Sometimes, it felt
like the final push, teasing him off the edge. The fall never hit all those years ago. Now it was
approaching faster. The hurricane finally caught him. His eyes closed, mind going quiet.

There was another person.

Don’t say my fucking name.

“I’m sorry…” He breathed out, voice lost in the quiet space.

With a wet and trembling hand, Will took his phone one more time. It was a long shot, he knew
that, but if there was even a chance to hear Mike’s voice again, he’d take it.

It rang. Will counted each one, waiting for the voicemail to come up. The phone was slipping out
of his hand, his body not strong enough to keep it up any longer. There were two more rings to go,
just two and it would be over.

One more. Then it all stopped.

“If Max finds out I picked up the phone and that I didn’t block you, I’m dead, so what do you
want?”
Mike.
 Chapter 31
Chapter Summary

Part one

Chapter Notes

TW: Blood

Heroes- Peter Gabriel

“Mike, just come, it’ll be fun and we’ll get food after–”

“Okay, do you really think I want to, first of all, go to a football practice, and second of all, see
Will? That sounds like torture.”

Max rolled her eyes, hip jutted out, “you need to stop laying around.”

“Why?”

“Because it’s not healthy.”

Mike continued to stare up at his ceiling, not-so-patiently waiting for Max to leave. He considered
himself to be in mourning, and that would go on as long as he remembered what Will looked like.

“I’m not going.”

“Why–”

“Max, I know you’re trying to help, I really do, but I can’t right now. It’s just…I don’t know, I feel
like shit all the time, and going and seeing him isn’t going to make that any better.” He glanced at
the redhead, trying to see if she was making any move to leave. Apparently, he wasn’t lucky
enough for that.

“Eventually you’re going to–”

“--have to move on. Yes I know, and I am, I have moved on. That doesn’t mean I want to see him,
okay? I know Lucas asked us to come, just tell him I’m sick or something.”

She let out a long sigh, “fine, but I’m dragging you out of this room tomorrow, got it?”

Mike waved her off, “yep. Now go so I can wallow in peace, you’re crushing the vibes in here I
swear.”

“I hate you.”

“Have a good time sucking Lucas’ face–” he didn’t have time to dodge the pillow thrown at his
face, “ow!”

“That did not hurt, shut up.” Max walked out of the room, “bye!”

Mike let out a grunt but didn’t bother to say anything else. The front door closed, leaving him alone
in the house. He appreciated her attempts, but they had all been useless. At times, he wanted to
scream. It was like no one understood, they didn’t get that it wasn’t easy for him. Will had felt like
the only person who understood him, someone he finally found after years of searching. His best
friend. Max seemed tone deaf to that. Not purposefully, he knew she meant well, but he wanted to
shake her ninety percent of the time.

Trying to ignore Will was like trying to ignore a nuclear bomb. It was impossible and had
devastating outcomes. Mike was consumed and he was too embarrassed to admit it out loud. Since
the beginning of the year Will had been there, a person Mike put his trust in only to find out he fell
for some picture-perfect version of the boy. It shattered him and he couldn’t find the glue to piece
himself together. Though, he figured Will still had it.

It was impossible to tell how long he stayed there, but eventually, his butt began to go numb. Just
as Mike was about to roll himself out of bed, his phone rang. He sighed, scrambling to pluck it off
the charger, freezing the second he saw who it was.
Something dropped within him. Max had blocked the number for him, but Mike only lasted a day
before secretly undoing that.

Will.

His name glowed, itching in Mike’s brain as he stared at it. There was something so haunting about
each ring, time ticking in the wrong direction as he waited. Mike gnawed at his lip, wanting to
have the power to decline. Luckily, Max wasn’t there to yell at him for being an idiot. So, before
the last ring could hit, he snatched it up, nerves peaking.

“If Max finds out I picked up the phone and that I didn’t block you, I’m dead, so what do you
want?” Mike rushed out, needing some kind of intro to the conversation. He couldn’t let Will get
the upper hand, Robin had taught him that much.

“Hi…”

He rolled his eyes, laying back down, “Really? That’s it?”

“Sorry um…I need help with…something.”

“Don’t think I’m the best person for that,” he muttered, “I bet if there’s ‘something’ you need help
with you can ask someone else.”

Mike pulled the phone away from his ear but didn’t get far before Will’s voice came back through.

“Wait! Just– wait…” There was a long pause, “I…l-look I’m sorry, I don’t want to bother you–”

“You didn’t do a very good job at that–”

“Shut up, c-can you just fucking shut up for a s-second,” Will breathed out, his voice strained.
There was a pinch that drew Mike’s attention. “I tried everyone else, n-no one is answering me.”
“Wait, what do you mean?”

“Can you p-please just...I need help, okay?”

“Aren’t you supposed to be at football or some shit?” He asked, grudgingly pulling himself off the
bed.

“Yes.”

“And you’re not?”

“No.”

Mike slumped down the stairs, “are you trying to run away and need help packing your stuff? How
poetic–”

“N-No…I hurt my…”

That made his heart stutter, hands grazing over his keys. That hadn’t even come to mind. Will
barely got hurt, he was like an unmovable statue. Mike had heard about him being injured and
remembered the bruises for evidence. Apparently, something happening to Will was impossible in
his head. It would have been nice to keep it that way.

“Hurt your what?” Will didn’t answer, “hey, where are you? Are you home or–”

“Home, I-I’m at home.”

Mike nodded swiftly, hurrying out to his car, “okay uh…just don’t move.”

“I can’t move.”
“What– what do you mean you can’t move? Did you break your leg?” He rushed out, struggling
to get the car started. The temperature had dropped, making his hands not keen to cooperate.

“No.”

“Can you give me more than that?” Mike sighed, pulling out of the driveway, phone pressed
between his shoulder and cheek. The sight was almost laughable, he felt like a soccer mom on the
go.

“No.”

“You’re fucking annoying, you know that?” He grumbled. “I’ll be there in a few minutes, just
don’t do anything dumb.”

“I can’t–”

He rolled his eyes, “yes I know, you can’t move. Also, if this is just a ploy to get me into your little
trap I’m going to be pissed. I was already stupid enough to pick up the phone.”

“Okay,” Will said after a stretch. There was something hidden in his voice, if Mike could study it,
he was sure it would be adoration.

Mike bit at his lip, “bye.”

He hung up the phone, heart racing. It was hard not to be drawn in, even before Mike knew of his
infatuation with Will, it was impossible to deny the boy. Hopefully, someday he’d develop the
skill; But it didn’t seem to be ‘coming to theaters’ any time soon.

The drive was silent, and barely anyone was on the roads. Mike was trying to mentally prepare to
see Will, though he knew it was nonviable. The last time they’d spoken it hadn’t been pretty, and
he figured that would probably happen again. As the house came into view, he almost wished he
hadn’t picked up the phone. Sometimes ignorant bliss is better than harsh reality.

Sometimes was generous. It was all the time, ignorant bliss was always better.
Mike walked to the front door, fist held up and ready to knock. Though it was useless since the
moment he touched the wood, it creaked open. He pinched his face, confusion hitting. The many
times he’d been over at the Byers’ house proved the door was always locked and unmovable. It
was a family trait. Nerves rose, and without needing any further welcoming, he walked inside.

The house smelled like alcohol, the scent so heavy he had to cover his nose.

“Will?” He called out, heart rate beginning to pick up. “Hey, are you in–”

Everything had stopped. Mike turned the corner. It was barely a pivot, the kitchen not being far
from the front door, but it felt like his life had flipped in an unsuspecting second. His muscles
shifted, face dropping, mouth parting as his lips became nothing but sandpaper.

It was horrifying how quickly things could change.

Mike sucked in a sharp breath, nausea rolling in his stomach. With blurry eyes, he scanned the
small area. There were shards of glass on the ground, surrounded by cheap-smelling beer. Though,
that was easy to sweep up. Just keep shoes on in the room for a while and open the windows to air
the smell out. Easy and forgettable in a few hours.

The blood. There was nothing that could ever erase the image from his mind. In seconds, Mike’s
life had been changed. No person should see that amount of blood.

No person should be losing that amount of blood.

Then Mike finally saw him. That was enough to break him in half, stomach finally erupting.

He let out a gag, trying to cover his mouth. Mike stared out the window, saliva threatening to drip
out as the stench of beer was overtaken by the iron scent of blood. So much crimson blood.

Will. That was Will’s blood.

Pushing himself forward, Mike stumbled to the ground. It all happened in the span of a few
seconds, Will barely having a chance to look at him before Mike was crowding his space.

“W-Why didn’t,” Mike pressed his eyes closed, “why didn’t you call an ambulance– shit! S-Shit I
need to call…”

“I didn’t t-think about…” Will finally spoke, his voice sounding like it had been rubbed against a
cheese grater.

Mike fumbled with his phone, moving swiftly. He could hear himself talking, but couldn’t fully
process what was being said. Will’s address came out, that was enough. It had to be enough. He
dropped the phone, hearing the screen crack, but not sparing it a glance.

Finally, he was able to take in the sight. Will was leaned against the fridge, face terrifyingly pale
and hair striking to his forehead. His right arm was covered in blood, completely unrecognizable. It
was spreading out quickly, and Mike could feel it soaking into his jeans, Will’s clothes already
beyond repair.

“Okay, okay we need to put pressure on it, to s-stop the bleeding–”

“N-No…no we…” Will let out a whimper, pressing his eyes closed, teeth clenched so tightly Mike
feared they’d snap.

“What do you mean? We have to or you’re gonna–” he cut himself off, meeting Will’s eye.

“T-There’s glass stuck everywhere if you,” Will tried to swallow, “if you put p-pressure on it, y-
you’re gonna push them in farther.”

Mike reached a hand up, being able to see Will slumping down, “hey, hey it’s o-okay, it’s okay
just…just stay awake.”

Gently, he pulled the blooded teen onto his lap, making sure to be careful with his head. Mike
glanced back towards the injury, terror welling inside of him. A large piece of glass was stuck in
his hand. The sight was nauseating.
“Can you pull them out?” He asked, brushing some of Will’s hair out of his face.

“No, t-that’ll make the bleeding worse.”

Mike never liked being helpless. Will had called for help, and all he could do was sit there.

“I don’t know what to do, Will I don’t– I don’t know what to do, tell me–”

“It’s o-okay…I don’t want to scare you, it’s okay.” Mike snapped his eyes to Will’s, the need to cry
becoming impossible to ignore. They were green, so much greener than Mike had ever seen them
before. “It’s j-just a little cut.”

He bit down harshly on his cheek, “yeah?”

Will’s lips twitched up, “yeah.”

He wiped his nose, it was a useless attempt to hide. Not that he ever wanted to. Mike stared,
soaking up Will’s face. For the first time, he felt like he knew the person laying in his lap. There
was nothing to run away from, no conversation that was pressing on them.

There was nothing anymore.

“What happened?” He whispered.

“I did something stupid.” Will licked at his lip, “it was worth it though.”

Mike shook his head, “I don’t really think it was.”

“I had the enthusiasm, that’s what’s important right?” Will choked out, voice drifting in the air.

He glanced around once again, the beer bottles taking up his vision. The house held a smell Will
had never been associated with, something of hatred and rotted souls. It was impossible to piece it
all together, but Mike could make an educated guess.

“You’re not supposed to listen to me, I say dumb shit,” he said, blinking so the tears didn’t make an
escape. “Y-You’re supposed to listen to smart people, p-people who run from things that try and
kill them, people that know how to h-hide–”

“People like me?”

Mike pressed his eyes shut, “Yeah, people like you.”

“I…” Will trailed off, a pained breath slipping out.

Panic rose in him, and he wrapped his arm tightly around Will’s waist. Mike kept his hold firm as
if that would do anything to stop the bleeding. In the back of his head, he knew it was too much
and no small motion could stop the oncoming red.

“Where the f-fuck is the ambulance? Fucking stupid, they don’t do s-shit, it’s like we all have to
save ourselves– okay, everything is good right?” He spat out quickly, resting a hand on Will’s
cheek, “it’s not too bad, i-it just looks bad, but you’re okay, you’ve got to be fine b-because I
don’t–”

“H-Hey–”

It was impossible to cut through his buzzing head, “d-don’t do this, please just be okay. I-I
thought– Will, just tell me how to fix it, I will do it I promise, t-this isn’t real–”

“What’s your favorite song?”

Once more, the room went quiet, his sinking terror pausing. Will’s voice was meek, cracking with
every word. Mike glanced down, bottom lip shaking as he saw one tear fall out of Will’s eye,
cascading down the side of his face.

“What?” He asked.
Will’s face slipped into a tiny smile, “you never told me.”

A sob fell out of his mouth, the eruption he had been trying to push back coming on full force.
Mike bent forward, pressing his head to Will’s bloody shirt, trying to get a whiff of the boy’s real
scent. Under the stink of blood, he found a hint of it.

“P-Please, please just– I don’t know, I don’t h-have– I don’t remember–” he babbled, throat
constricting as he tried to heave in some air.

“Come on…c-come on you know,” Will whispered, “please tell me.”

Mike let his eyes fall shut, “W-Who Wants to Live Forever.”

“That's a good…” Will attempted to take a full breath, “good one.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah… who wants to live forever, ” Will’s singing voice was barely audible, coming out with one
breath; But it was there. A comfort that Mike should have been the one giving.

He lifted his head just enough to meet Will’s eye, having to glance away when he saw how hard
the boy was crying. It was silent, everything with Will always was.

“And we can’t have forever,” he sang back, wiping his nose, “a-and we can’t love forever.”

“D-Didn’t know you liked Queen.”

Mike let out a watery laugh, “everyone likes Queen.”

“You kinda look like Freddie Mercury,” Will’s words were slurred, and Mike held on a little bit
tighter, hoping that would do anything to stop time.
“M-My mom says that,” one of his tears smacked Will’s lips, “she hates it though.”

“I think it’s great,” Will smiled, “a real Rockstar.”

“M-Maybe someday I’ll go to Madison Square Garden,” he gently tapped Will’s cheek, “when I
make it to the big leagues.”

“You're gonna have to t-tell me all…all about it,” Will’s face fell, eyes clouded, “thanks for
coming to s-sit with me.”

He smiled the best he could, “thanks for c-calling me.”

“I wish I could touch you.”

Mike sniffed, nodding quickly, “you can, it’s okay–”

Will shook his head, the motion slow and filled with agony, “I c-can’t feel my arm.”

“Hey, it’s okay, we’re gonna get you out of here alright? I’ve got you, I’ve got–”

“I can’t feel anything, I c-can’t feel–” Will tried to take a breath, but it got stuck, his face paling
with each second. The timer was sprinting away from them.

“Don’t do that, d-don’t–” Mike heard the sirens in the distance, “I’m right here, you can feel me, I-
I’m here.”

“Blood… it's blood, t-too much,” it was hard to make out Will’s words, his body slumping with
every second. The sirens grew, but they still felt miles away.

“I know, I know it’s a lot, you’re gonna be o-okay–”

Will’s phone started going off. Each call ends only for another one to pick up seconds later. He
kicked it to the side, pulling Will closer to him, keeping a hand behind his head so it didn’t fall.

“Mike…” Will finally said, as if the word had broken away without permission.

Don’t say my fucking name.

“Fuck,” he cursed, “f-fuck Will, you’ve gotta stay awake, stay with me for a few more m-
minutes–”

“I’m so s-sorry I shouldn’t…I shouldn’t have c-called I’m sorry. I-I didn’t mean to scare you, I’m
sorry…”

Mike could barely make out what he was saying. Will’s eyes were glazing over, losing the green in
them much too quickly.

“Hey, hey come on, come on stay with me.” He got nothing, “Will! Come– Help! P-Please!”

The door flew open, the house bustling with running feet. Mike knew EMTs were in the kitchen,
but their faces were impossible to make out. As a hand reached down, he pulled Will closer.

“N-No, no don’t touch him, don’t touch him! G-Go–”

“Hey, hey kid you’ve gotta let go, we’re gonna get him help.” A Man’s voice drifted into his ear,
but he shook his head, utter panic overtaking him. He watched with wide eyes as Will’s limp body
was yanked from his arms.

“No! No l-let me go, let me go!” He screamed, kicking as his arms were pulled back.

Mike felt the world move slowly around him, but he stayed put. He was being held back, only able
to watch as Will was lifted onto a stretcher.

“He’s going into hypovolemic shock!” Someone yelled, but it sounded like they were sinking
underwater. “Okay kid, stay with us, stay with us, come on buddy.”

The stretcher was rushed outside. Mike followed them, tears rolling down his face. The sky had
darkened, becoming nothing but gray fog.

Snow. It was snowing for the first time.

Two cars swerved into the driveway as Will was being lifted into the ambulance. Mike couldn’t
move, hands stained with blood that would never wash off.

Seven heads emerged up, but their faces were undetailed. A dash of red popped into view.

“Mike–”

“What happened–”

“Will–”

“Where is he? What’s going on–”

“Mike! Answer me, fucking–”

“He’s covered in blood–”

“Who’s is that–”

“He called and we didn’t–”

“What the fuck is going on! Mike please, please–”

“He looks like he’s gonna pass out–”

“That’s my brother! W-Where–”

Mike stumbled back, breathing becoming unworkable with every passing second. He brought his
hands up, covering his ears to block out the haunting screams.

“Let me go!” He begged, squeezing his eyes shut, “l-let me g-go, let me go, let me go–”

A hand cupped the back of his head and he was being wrestled into a familiar chest. The scent of
leather filled his senses.

“N-No! No, no it’s my f-fault, It’s my fault let me go–” He screamed, sobbing as he weakly
punched the person’s chest.

“Hey, Mike, breathe, it’s okay…it’s okay .”

It was Eddie.

He collapsed into the hold, legs almost giving out with relief. Mike gripped onto Eddie, trying to
find some security as his world crumbled to dust.

Nothing helped, Will’s blood was still seeping into his nose. He couldn’t run away from it, the
scent had tattooed itself into him.

With ringing ears, he heard someone else sobbing, the voice familiar. Mike didn’t dare open his
eyes, not wanting to know what had been caused. A domino effect of horror. He hadn’t picked up
the phone fast enough.

Mike hadn’t been fast enough. His body began to drift, the feelings of his arms and legs
unnoticeable. Tears slithered down, dodging past his lips as they went. Mike should have picked
up the phone sooner. He should have moved faster. He would take seeing Will’s eyes again any
day over the ignorant bliss.
Now all he had was the crimson blood, a color he would run from for the rest of his life. He saw
something that day, the true form of the boy that had taken up his mind; And in that same hour, he
saw that boy disappear.

Who has forever anyway?

 Chapter 32
Chapter Notes

Night We Met- Lord Huron

TW: talks of abuse, mostly physical.

“Robin, I don’t want to talk, you just do it.”

“I’m not the singer Mike, it’ll be easier–”

“I need to rest my voice,” he said, dramatically holding a hand to his throat.

She huffed, “it’s the first performance of the year.”

“Yeah, that’s why you should do it.”

Max walked into the room, tucking the front of her AC/DC shirt in. It wasn’t common for her to
pick that one out, he figured it was because of the hole in the side.

“Robin, he’s not gonna give it up, just do it.”

“Should I give a speech?”

Mike snorted, “yeah, that would be–”

“No speeches need to be given, just do a little intro or something.” Eddie spoke up as he
desperately tried to tug a comb through his hair. It was a useless attempt.

“Hey, what’s with the suspenders?” Mike asked, fiddling with his rings.
Robin smiled brightly, “you like them? Vickie and I went to the thrift store this weekend. Quite the
steal right?”

“I don’t know about that,” Max muttered.

“Is it crowded out there?” Eddie asked, shifting the conversation before it got hostile.

Robin nodded, “yeah, I think we’re causing a fire hazard.”

“Sick,” Mike said.

He always enjoyed the time before shows. The calm before the storm. It was usually the only time
Eddie wasn’t bouncing off the walls since he was trying to get in his ‘focus zone’. Mike glanced at
himself in the crappy mirror, he had gone for a simple look. Jeans, boots, and a flannel that was
much too large. Bringing a hand up, he ran it over the necklace gracing his collarbone.

“Alright, you guys ready?” Max asked, picking up her bass.

They all agreed and silently made their way out. The makeshift stage wasn’t huge, but luckily
didn’t have any trouble fitting all of them comfortably. Lights hit his face, thousands of
meaningless words floating around the filled room.

“Go ahead,” he mouthed to Robin, sending her a cheeky smile.

"Hey everyone! Thanks for coming out!" She said excitedly, waving out at the crowd in a way
Mike found pretty adorable.

“See? Was that so hard?” He said, walking over to the mic.

Robin rolled her eyes, “shut up.”

Mike adjusted himself, taking time to soak in the cheers. The feeling always left him giddy,
wanting to feel that electrifying power forever. At first he thought he was some kind of egomaniac,
but now he knew it was just the thrill of performing; And what a thrill it was. He danced his fingers
across the strings, listening as music started to devour the room.

"I see nothing in your eyes, and the more I see the less I like..."

He felt the eyes on him, each one not digging deeper than a surface level. Every person looked the
same, reminding him of drawn in stick figures. They stared, watched, and would move on the
second he closed his mouth. Not one connection would ever be made and it created an experience
he got drunk off of.

"I know nothing of your kind and I won't reveal your evil mind, is it over yet?"

Mike’s hands worked on autopilot, the song having carved itself into his mind.

"So sacrifice yourself and let me have what's left. I know that I can find the fire in your eyes..."

He let his eyes scan around the room, expecting to find nothing. For the most part, faceless people
popped up; but in the far corner he saw something. Someone. Never before had Mike gotten
distracted during a performance, but he was stunted, unable to find the rational part of his mind.

A soft gaze was staring right at him, eyes so wide Mike was sure they came out of a comic book.
His heart moved right into his throat, an addicting chill skimming over every part of his skin. Even
in the dim light Mike could see every detail of the boy’s face.

“You take the breath right out of me…”

The lyrics came out as a whisper, stuck in his throat as if they were a hidden confession. The boy’s
head slightly cocked to the side, his lips parted. Mike’s stomached swooped down, his fingers
almost losing step. There was a beauty to him that was terrifying, Mike snapped his head forward,
face twitching with an awkwardness he’d never held on stage. He almost cringed out how
unnatural it must have seemed.

"You gotta fight just to make it through 'cause I will be the death of you..."
Mike knew he kept singing, but the lyrics were lost, his brain moving elsewhere, zeroed in on a
startling pair of green eyes.

Will Byers.

—--------

“He’s having trouble breathing.”

"You have a nice voice.”

"Oh you like it?"

“Stop it, I'm able to spot talent."

"Well of course you are if you're able to see how much of it I possess."

“Start compressions, it’s getting worse.”

“We would have been good friends."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

“The bleeding isn’t stopping, we need to start–”

“Mike?”
An echoed yell came right after, “come on, breathe kid, breathe –”

A hand landed on his shoulder, “Mike! Hey, you’ve gotta breathe, don’t listen okay? Don’t listen.”

He hated hospitals. They smelled too clean, like someone had come in and bleached the whole
place. Mike didn’t remember getting there, he knew a car had been involved, that was inevitable.

No matter the pressure he put on his ears, the screams didn’t cease.

“Mike, come on, it’s just me. Open your eyes.”

They had followed right after the ambulance, everyone desperately trying to contact Will and
Jane’s mom as the voicemail continued to come up. Mike couldn’t do anything but sit there,
wondering if the day terrors Will spoke about were anything like what he felt.

“G-Go away,” he choked out, hair stuck to his forehead from sweat. Mike had his nose pinched
shut, wanting the deathly smell of blood to leave him.

He was being dragged away from the haunting door and down the hall. Mike was desperate to get
a glimpse of Will while also being nauseated by the idea.

There was too much blood, no one could survive losing that much blood.

“Everything is okay,” the person whispered, pulling him back against their chest. Mike felt as if he
was gargling salt water, swallowing near impossible. Maybe his body was punishing him.

“He needs to get out of here.” Someone whispered, her voice vaguely familiar.

"Oh you want to hear my Shakespeare?"

“No–"
"With mirth and laughter let old wrinkles come."

"That's a good one."

"You like it? Not gonna whine?"

“No.”

“I know, but the cops still want to talk to him.”

Mike closed his eyes, skin itching as a hand brushed through his hair.

“Like this? They’re not gonna get shit, he’s covered in blood–”

He let out a sharp whimper, trying to cover his ears, “s-stop, stop.”

“Hey, it’s okay, everything’s okay.”

“W-Will–”

“He is going to be okay. Everyone is safe.”

Mike quickly shook his head, “no, no he’s– no it’s my fault he’s h-hurt, he’s dying–”

“Okay, he’s freaking out again, can you get some water, Eddie?” The voice sounded like it was
underwater, but he could make out something familiar about it.

“Robin, he won’t touch it, we tried–”

“I know, but I don’t know what to do okay? And I’m f-freaking out right now and he won’t talk
and Jane is hiding in the bathroom and Max can’t get her out, no fucking adult is answering us and
Will–”

“Shut up , Robin, you’re gonna send him into cardiac arrest or some shit–”

“Okay a fucking hospital is not the place to be talking about cardiac arrest–”

Mike groaned, “shut up, please shut up.”

Slowly, Robin’s breathing became noticeable against his back, and Mike did his best to follow it.
Where his mind had been screaming, each swipe of blood on his body taunting him seconds ago,
now he was only met with silence. With blurred vision, he noticed Eddie crouched in front of him,
face pinched together with worry, eyes bloodshot.

“Hey, how are you doing?” Robin whispered in his ear, fingers still moving through his hair.

“I’m gonna throw up,” he rushed out, stomach launching.

“Shit, okay.”

Mike was maneuvered into a sitting position, a blindingly white trash can flying in front of him. He
gripped the sides, stomach launching. His entire back ached with tension as the measly acid fell
into the bin. It was pathetic and wasn’t enough to satisfy the sickness raging inside of him.

Keeping his eyes closed, Mike slumped back, confident someone would catch him. He didn’t want
to see his hands anymore. When they first arrived, some nurse had tried to clean him up, but Mike
vaguely remembered fighting her. He regrets that now.

“What’s going on?” He muttered, allowing Eddie to shove a cup of water in his hand.

“We’re in the waiting room, Will is in surgery right now, okay?”

“Jane?”

Robin sighed, “she…she’s not doing great, Max and Lucas are trying to talk to her. Dustin is still
calling Mrs. Byers. Chrissy and Steve are in the other room.”

“Will…b-blood, there’s blood–”

“Shh, we know, we know about the blood.” Robin held him closer, “I’m so sorry, Mike. I’m so
sorry.”

“What?” He muttered.

Eddie patted a damp paper towel on his forehead, “he– Will called us too, we didn’t see it until
they went on break. We would have been there, I’m so sorry you went alone–”

“I only had to s-see it, Will was the one–” he cut himself off, “I’m not the p-person you should be
apologizing to.”

“I know,” Robin whispered, “I know. We know.”

The doors flew open, reminding Mike of the beginning of a musical number.

“Mrs. Byers–”

“Where’s my son?”

“Ma’am, we need you to calm down–”

“Where’s my son! Tell me, tell me where he is!”

Mike grabbed Eddie’s arm, pulling himself up. The woman’s eyes were frantic, hands trembling.

“Mrs. Byers,” he got out, voice meek. She snapped her head towards him, face paling in seconds.

“Baby, what’s going on?” She hurried towards him, pushing past the nurse. Mike swallowed a
lump in his throat as the woman cupped his cheeks, her eyes watery, “where’s Will? Is he okay?
What happened?”

“H-He got, he’s–” Mike cut himself off, not being able to get the words out.

“Ma’am, please come with us and we will explain everything, alright?” The nurse said, his voice
timid, trained in approaching erratic people.

“Mom?”

They all turned, watching as Jane walked out, Lucas and Max not far behind. Her face was blotchy,
eyes almost swollen shut. Mike only then realized he probably looked significantly worse.

Jane stumbled into her mother’s arms, clingy onto her like a terrified child. Sadly, that’s exactly
what she was.

“It’s alright, I’m here, I’m right here,” the woman answered, brushing Jane’s hair back.

After that, Mike didn’t get to hear anymore as the family was pulled to the side. They had been
waiting for what felt like hours trying to get in contact with her, not being able to do anything
without a parent. Though, for Mike it all felt like seconds. He was sure he had just been holding
Will, now it was all warped.

“Mike sit down,” Max’s croaked voice came out. She gently pulled him into one of the plastic
chairs.

Suddenly, they all found themselves collapsed in a circle. Max and Lucas sat huddled together,
Steve was leaned against the wall, face pulled into a tight line. Chrissy was sniffling, her head bent
as she refused to look at them. Robin and Eddie sat close to him, seeming fearful he would crack.
They had every right to be worried.

Dustin’s eyes looked far away, hands dropped to his sides as he stood not far from Steve. It was a
miserable picture, one Mike wanted to erase it from his brain.

“What happened?” Steve whispered, cautiously breaking the silence.

Mike felt eyes on him, and his skin began to crawl. He casted his gaze to the side, the blood
coming to the forefront of his mind once again.

“I-I can’t–”

“Mike,” Lucas pleaded, his voice cracking with heartbreak.

He shook his head, “I-I can’t explain it, I can’t.”

“I don’t care! I want the piece of shit in prison. I-I want –”

Mike pressed his lips together.

“Mrs. Byers, we understand, but we need you to stay calm with us. Do you have any idea where he
might have gone?”

Cops hoarded the room, a sight more sickening than Mike ever guessed it could be. He wanted to
piece it together, to have some kind of timeline. No matter how hard he searched it wasn’t there,
Mike guessed he had finally reached an emotional break.

"Luckily, you never shut up so it should be easy.”

"If I memorize a new one you have to listen to it, promise?"

"I promise."

“He sounded normal on the call,” Mike got out, the words feeling like acid. Heads snapped towards
him, “I-I didn’t move very fast, I never would have thought– I-I walked into the house and it
smelled like beer and…”

Mike glanced down at his stained arms, and that seemed to be enough to give them the message.
He took a deep breath, trying to stop his trembling hands.

“Was he…” Max cleared her throat, “was he conscious?”

“Yeah,” he sighed, “y-yeah he was. Really calm too, I started freaking out and he just said it was o-
okay. Said he didn’t want to scare me…told me it was okay, h-he promised it was okay…”

Mike bit down on his bottom lip, voice cracking. Will’s eyes came to his mind. The details of the
boy’s face were imprinted in his head.

"There's that smile."

“Shut up."

"So, you gonna teach me how to paint?"

"I suppose I don't have any other choice, do I?"

“He’s always been a bad liar.. I think it was his–” He clenched his fists, “you know how Jane said
their dad was staying with them?”

“Oh shit…” Eddie breathed out.

“I didn’t think Will was staying there. I would have made him come with me, I would have–”
“Lucas, it’s not your fault,” Chrissy spoke up for the first time, her voice shaking. “I actually knew
and didn’t do anything.”

Mike couldn’t listen to them, it was too far away. They didn’t understand, no one could ever
understand what happened.

“There was glass stuck up his entire right arm,” he paused, “it looked like he got shot. The
blood…”

“So his dad–”

He cut Robin off, “I don’t know, I d-don’t know what really happened, I–”

“It was him.”

They all turned, seeing Jane standing there. Her face was blank, eyes dripping with tears.

“Will would never touch beer, I-I know it was him, I know–” she collapsed next to Dustin, letting
the boy pull her into a hug, “Will’s so stubborn half the time I think he actually wants me to call
him out. J-Just to say ‘no, I know you’re not fine, I know you’re scared and I’m going to force you
to tell me’ but I don’t, I never have. I-I mean, it’s not what most people want, right? Will says he
wants to be left alone, I listen, and I think he was begging for someone not to listen to him. I
always did.”

Mike turned his eyes up, catching her gaze. There was a silent understanding between them, one
too fragile to speak aloud.

“He didn’t really seem like someone that could get hurt,” Max whispered.

“He’s a person–”

Dustin cut Lucas off, “he doesn’t always act like one, shit it’s like we barely know anything about
him.”

“He likes socks with designs on them,” Mike choked out, noticing Jane’s brows pinch together.
Her face pulled into a sad smile, something encouraging there, “h-he doesn’t like to sit on his bed
unless he’s about to sleep and draws in the corner. There’s a heater over there and sometimes he’ll
bring a blanket to make a bubble. I sat with him once and almost burned my leg.”

Lucas let out a short laugh, tears cascading down his face, “he always hates being cold, I mean,
we’ve all seen his layering, it’s ridiculous.”

“One time I walked outside a-and saw him sitting with this huge coat on. I could barely tell it was
him. It was, like, sixty-seven degrees out,” Robin chuckled.

“I um, when we were camping I kept trying to teach him how to skip rocks. Every time I explained
it he just kept getting worse. I told him at the end and he said ‘well, success isn’t linear’ I think at
that point he was just messing with me,” Max added in, her voice more timid than he’s ever heard
before.

“When I got high for the first time, I somehow found my way to the house. He was the only one
home and I remember spending the night throwing up. Will sat there with me the whole time and
held my hair back.” Steve’s smile was hard to look at. It was trembling, breaking with every
second.

“My dad was always a piece of s-shit but I never– Will took all the blame, every single time. He
never hit us. Never hit me,” Jane swallowed, “there was only one time that I thought– I don’t
know. My mom and I went to the store, when we came home my dad’s truck was gone. Will was
in his room and the door was busted in, handle snapped, there was a dent on the wall too…he was
just sitting there. Didn’t cry, didn’t say anything actually; b-but I saw…his sleeves were rolled up
and his arms were covered in bruises, his right elbow was almost all black. He was ten. Told me he
was fine, that nothing happened and I believed him. Apparently the worst thing you can ever do is
listen to anything Will says, it’s like a death sentence. The second he does ask for help I’m too
fucking stupid to answer, I was angry at him and he asked for help and I–”

Mike casted his eyes to the side as silence came over them. Jane’s cries were barely audible, but
they were present enough to break his heart.

“If there’s one thing I know about Will, it’s that he’d be pissed if he found out you were blaming
yourself for anything,” Dustin said, rubbing her shoulder.
“He’s not here to be angry, he might not even fucking be a-alive–”

Mike stood up, the chair squeaking. It was ungraceful and messy, but the words cut right into his
heart. He looked around at all of their surprised faces. It was like they forgot that he was there,
forgot that Will’s dried blood had ingrained itself into him.

Without another word, he turned and walked from the circle, vision choppy as he moved towards
the bathroom. They were all suffocating him.

He fell into a stall, locking the flimsy door. Mike sat on the toilet and brought his knees up,
rocking back and forth. The white walls blinded him, fluorescent lights seemed unnecessary.
Hospitals weren’t supposed to be interrogation rooms.

"I'm waiting, after that Oscar winning performance I expect to be blown away."

"I cannot work under this kind of pressure."

"Would it help you think if I sit here and brutally make fun of you?"

"How did you know that's what I needed? Such a smart boy, aren't you?"

Mike hummed to himself, silent tears rolling down his cheeks.

People came in and out of the bathroom as he sat there, body eventually going numb. It seems all
his friends figured out he wanted to be alone.

“Mike?”

He closed his eyes, “I don’t want to talk–”

“We can see him.”

Mike froze, legs sliding off the toilet. He fiddled with the door and stepped out, being met with
Lucas’ wide eyes.

“Is he awake?”

The other boy took Mike’s arm, “no, but he’s stable. I thought I should tell you first.”

“First?”

“Everyone else fell asleep.”

Mike couldn’t feel himself walking as Lucas pulled him closer to the room. He remembered what
was being yelled inside of it, the horrors that would never stop causing his nightmares.

Now there was nothing, only the sound of low beeping coming through. Mike held his breath as
Lucas pushed open the door.

His breath caught.

“Hey boys,” Joyce said, her voice strained.

Mike couldn’t pay attention to that, his focus zeroed in. Will had some mask over his face, the
sound of his breathing ragged. Then, his eyes casted to the bandaged arm, that’s when Mike lost all
ability to take in air.

“I can’t feel anything, I c-can’t feel–”

“Don’t do that, d-don’t–”

“Blood… it's blood, t-too much.”

“Mike?”

He ran far away from that room.

“Mike!”

Mike…
 Chapter 33
Chapter Notes

Dreamlife- Tony Anderson

“Well, there was a significant amount of blood loss. What I’m happy to report is that most of the
cuts weren’t too deep. Of course, when you’re seeing that amount of blood believing that is hard–”

“So you’re saying everything is okay? He hasn’t woken up in a week.”

Will’s head was pounding. The voices shifted in, cutting out like they were on a call with bad
service.

“Mrs. Byers, again, the blood loss took a toll. The news we have is good, I know this is still hard,
but your son is going to be alright.”

He heard his mom let out a breath, “right, sorry.”

“The injuries closer to his wrist are the ones that were concerning. Particularly, the one moving
into his hand. As we’re seeing here, the glass nicked pretty close to his ulnar nerve–”

“What does that mean?”

The doctor sighed, “it’s one of the three nerves in the hand, ma’am. We’re lucky it’s not the
median nerve, if the glass had gone even the tiniest inch deeper, both of them would have been hit.
The ulnar nerve controls a lot of the movement in the fingers–”

“So he can’t move his fingers?” There was a pause, “sorry.”

“Thank you. It’s damaged. It’s very common for that nerve to have some damage, but not really
like this. We’re really lucky the nerve wasn’t cut. If it was, it would have, most likely, caused
paralysis in the hand and that would move up his arm.”
“Alright, so it was only damaged, right? He’ll be fine–”

“Well yes, he will be fine, but when anything serious happens to these nerves it’s not something to
take lightly. Even damage is going to make fine movements difficult. What I’m happy about is the
speed at which he’s healing. I do think it’s possible he can build those skills back up and make a
full recovery.”

“But you can’t promise anything?”

There was a beat of silence.

“No, unfortunately, I cannot promise anything.”

Will kept his eyes closed, not sure what was awaiting him on the other side. His arm was pulsing,
it didn’t feel like pain, but like his heartbeat had moved.

“I’m sorry, but we’re hopeful.”

His mom sniffed, “I know, thank you. He’s strong, he’ll be okay.”

“Yes, he will be okay.”

As the dryness in his throat made itself known, Will peeled open his eyes. He winced from the
bright lighting, almost sure he had glue stuck to his lashes.

“Baby, hi, hi.” His mom’s words were rushed, body shifting closer as he attempted to gain his
bearings. “Do you need some water, honey? Are you feeling okay? Does your head hurt? Does–”

“Mom,” he croaked out, her rambling making him regret waking up.

She pulled his left hand to her lips, “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, what can I do for you?”
“Some water.”

“Okay,” she nodded, “Okay, I can–”

“I’ll grab some for you,” the doctor said, looking at him with a small smile. At least, Will assumed
it was a smile, all he saw was a blurry movement.

The door clicked shut and he felt lips against his fist. When a wet drop hit his skin, Will turned his
head to the side.

“Mom…mom don’t cry.”

She shook her head, “I’m sorry.”

“I’m gonna be okay.”

A sigh left her mouth, “you shouldn’t be reassuring me, baby. I should be making you feel better.”

“I’m sorry.”

She let out a watery laugh, “you’ve got nothing to be sorry for. Absolutely nothing , you
understand that?”

“What’s wrong with my arm?” He whispered, watching her eyes as they shifted from him.

“It’s just…it might be a little bit hard to get it back into shape. It’s all going to be okay, I promise.”
She sent him a smile, “I love you so much.”

“Love you too.”

The door opened, “alright, here we go.”

His mom took the cup and helped him take a sip. If Will were in a better mental state, it probably
would have been embarrassing. The doctor stood there, hands in his pockets. Will glanced at the
man, waiting for something to drop.

“We’ll get you all checked up, but I’ll tell you what I told your mother–”

“I heard.” He said, voice unwavering.

The man’s eyebrows shot up, “oh. Well, we can skip the recap then. How are we feeling about that
information?”

“I’m okay.”

“You’re okay?”

“Honey, you can tell him if–”

He cut her off, “I’m fine.”

“Alright well, that’s great. You’re a strong kid, you know that?”

Will made no movements. He knew he was staring at something, but all of it seemed bleak,
lacking any life. The white walls moved closer with each second, itching to suffocate him.

“When can we take him home?”

The doctor cleared his throat, “we’d like to keep him for another night, but if nothing changes, you
can take him home tomorrow afternoon.”
“Thank you.”

The conversation continued, but Will didn’t pick up any of it. Usually, he’d at least nod along, act
like he understood what was being said to him. There was nothing, every ounce of energy had been
sucked out of him.

When the door finally closed, the doctor leaving them alone, Will didn’t move.

“Honey?”

“Is Jane okay?”

“Yeah, yeah she’s okay. She’s on her way back right now.” His mom’s voice was shaky, showing
she was seconds away from crying. With a pinch of strength, he squeezed her hand. If he couldn’t
make himself feel better, maybe he could be of use to someone else.

“You are really strong, you know that?”

“Mom–”

“I know you probably don’t want to hear it, but I am so sorry. I should have listened to Jane, I had
no idea–” she shook her head, “it doesn’t matter, it is my job to keep you safe and I didn’t do that.
I’m so so sorry, baby.”

He wanted to reassure her, tell her that everything was okay; but nothing came out of his mouth.
There was a jagged hole in the middle of his chest. Will felt like if he looked down, he wouldn’t be
met with his body, but some ghostly figure. The threads of his skin had been pulling apart for years
now, maybe they had finally reached their breaking point.

Will didn’t respond, not having time before the door was opened. He took in his sister’s face, easily
being able to read the lines on her skin. They were pulled, decorated with a haunted feeling he’d
never seen before.

“Will?” She whispered, voice cracking.

“Hi–”

Jane was flinging her body onto him. Will hadn’t had time to blink before he was engulfed. There
was heat on her, one he hadn’t felt in ages. Jane had always run too warm, which made them polar
opposites from the beginning.

Slowly, he brought his left arm up and patted her back, lips tightened together, too frightened to
utter a word.

“You’re awake,” she said, cupping the back of his head.

“I’ll let you two talk,” their mom said, standing up and walking from the room. Jane didn’t pull
away until the door was closed.

“She’s been pretty insufferable.” Jane wiped her eyes, sending him a strained smile.

“Oh.”

She sat down, wrapping her green sweater close, “sorry, I don’t mean it in like– she hasn’t been
sleeping or anything. I woke up the other day and she was yelling at a cop over the phone.”

“A cop?”

“Uh yeah, it wasn’t too hard to figure out dad–” Jane cut herself off, “it doesn’t matter right now.
You’re awake, that’s what matters.”

“Did you think I wasn’t going to wake up?” He asked softly, meeting her gaze.

“I don’t know, after the third day I kind of started to freak out, we all did.”

“All?”
Jane nodded, “everyone has been coming to see you, we…you called us when it happened. Will,
I’m so sorry–”

“Please stop apologizing, it’s not your fault.” He looked up at the ceiling, “it’s no one's fault.”

“I should have answered you. The others didn’t have their phones, but I should have done
something. So I have every right to apologize.”

Will bit at the inside of his cheek, “I’m fine.”

“You’re not fine.”

He didn’t have a retort for that. Repeating the phrase over and over again didn’t seem to have the
same effect anymore. The words were hollow, nothing behind them but a lost child.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” he tried, hoping that would give him a better out.

Jane sighed, “yeah, okay.”

“Does it look bad?” He asked, still not having seen his arm.

She took his left hand, “right now it’s all covered up, so I can’t give you a real answer, but I think
it’ll look badass.”

“Oh.”

“The others want to see you too.”

Will’s stomach tightened. He had hoped the day would erase itself, but Mike’s face popped into his
head; Mike’s horrified and sickly green-looking face. Swallowing thickly, he glanced at his sister.
She had a hopeful smile on, one he was scared of crushing.
“Has he…” Will trailed off, voice threatening to break, “has–”

He stopped himself the second he saw her expression fall. That hollow feeling inside grew,
threatening to seep out and punctuate anyone around him. Will held his breath, watching as Jane’s
face shifted with thought.

“He…it’s just been hard–”

“Okay.” Will let the word cut itself out. He knew what the response would be, and felt Jane’s
mood drop the second he mentioned Mike.

Not everyone wanted to see him.

“Will, it’s not because of you–”

“It’s fine, Jane. Look, I’m kind of tired.”

She scooted closer, “Will, we’ve tried to get him–”

“I don’t care, okay? It’s fine.” He closed his eyes, wishing he could cry, “it’s fine.”

Will turned his head away, signaling the end of the conversation. Guilt huddled in him, knowing
he owed it to her to talk, but the idea was nauseating. He wanted to feel things, for all of the bottled
emotions to be smashed apart. There was nothing there, no well to jump down. It had been
cemented up with the last of Will still inside, having given up hope on getting out weeks ago.

As the room went quiet, he twitched his pointer finger on his right hand, trying not to winch as pain
shot up his arm. It was like a chore, the movement sluggish and uncoordinated. Will fell asleep
with a tight ball in his stomach, wondering if there was ever a chance to release it.

—-------
The house looked the same. The front door had chipped paint, the grass needed to be mowed, and
was turning yellow. His beat-up car sat there, probably frozen and unusable. Will glanced to the
clothesline, watching as it moved with the wind, seconds away from falling.

“Alright, are you okay?” His mom asked, coming over to the door. Acting like he was a baby that
needed to be lifted up.

“Yeah,” he whispered, glancing back at Jane. She gave him a tight smile, one that didn’t even
threaten to reach her eyes.

Everything smelled like bleach. Too clean and nothing like his home. Will stood in the doorway as
the other two walked in. It was like someone had come in and vacuumed the walls, not a sign of
life anywhere.

Will glanced at the pictures hanging up, feeling stuck. He saw himself there, hair shaggy and
drifting by his eyes, an ugly sweater on that was supposed to be Jane’s. Will wondered what he
looked like now, but it was a question better left unanswered, the gleam that used to overtake his
eyes was gone. He was sure of it.

“Honey, are you coming?” Her voice sounded far away, drifting on a different plane of existence.

“Yeah, sorry.”

As he walked away, the eyes stayed on him. Maybe if he turned around again, he’d understand
what they were trying to say.

“Alright, we got your room all cleaned up. Lucas picked you up a doorknob, so that should feel
better yeah?” His mom said, rubbing his back a little too fast.

“Yeah, thanks.”

“I’m gonna make you two something to eat, you just get settled– oh, and if you need anything you
come get me okay?” She cupped his face, worry lines becoming permanent tattoos.
“Okay, mom.”

She kissed his head before walking out of the room, leaving Will alone in the dreary space. He
took a step farther, the floorboards creaking as he did. His arm hung uselessly, covered in white
bandaging he’d have to redo twice a day. The idea of moving his hand and finding out it was
useless felt like an oncoming nightmare, so he ignored it, acted like it was in a cast and nothing
more.

The bed sheets were too clean, reminding him of a hotel room. The covers squeezed around the
mattress, seeming like they had just been forced into a much too-tight pair of pants. Will looked at
his desk, lips tugging together as the small stack of colored pencils glared at him. They weren’t
supposed to be there. Someone must have come in and found his hiding spot.

A knock came, “hey, are you doing–”

“Did you move these?” He whispered, heart racing.

“Oh yeah, I found them under your bed, I thought–”

“I put them there, they’re not supposed to be out here, no one is supposed to see,” he rushed, words
muffled together. Will grabbed the box, barely able to keep his hold as his hand began to tremble.

“Hey, I’m sorry I didn’t know, we can put them back…”

Will went onto his knees, crouching onto the floor, “j-just leave them, I don’t want anyone to touch
them, okay?”

“Okay, I’m sorry,” she said, voice filled with timid surprise.

He clenched his eyes shut, humiliation rising up. The room was silent, but he knew she was still
standing there. Will stared under his bed, the space was vacant other than the small box. A tear
slipped down, moving in a straight line. It cut the side of his lips, but never quite touched.

“Will,” Jane said, walking over to where he was.

Without another word, she sat next to him, their sides pressed close together. He wanted to ask
what she saw. Will had always been very aware of being perceived, it was a curse. He knew that
everyone had a skimming thought of who he must be, even if it was nothing but an observation.

“You should show me some of your drawings, I’d really like to see them.”

Will’s eyes blurred, tears sitting and waiting for him to break. Her voice was shaken as if she was
begging for him to say something. Keeping his gaze firm, he caught sight of the loose pencil as it
rolled towards him. The blue one. It was worn down, overused, and needed a replacement. Will
didn’t have any interest in doing that, deciding he’d rather sharpen it until nothing was left. Blue
captured everything if it was looked at the right way.

“They’re not for people to see,” he whispered.

Jane nudged their shoulders together, “how am I gonna know if you’re any good then?”

“I’m not.”

“Come on, please talk to me–”

“There’s nothing to talk about.”

She gently grabbed his good hand, “don’t do that. You can’t keep pushing me away.”

“Just because I was in the hospital doesn’t mean anything changed–”

“No, shut up. You don’t get to do that. I know what happened, I know that you were with Mike, I
know all of it and I am still here . What do you want me to do? Hate you? Because you can sit
here and wait for that forever and it’s not going to happen. I don’t fucking care about him, I care
about you , you’re my brother.”

Will closed his eyes, “I hurt you.”

“It’s okay to make mistakes.”

His shoulders tensed, “no, n-no it’s not okay, I hurt everyone and I embarrassed you and I–”

“And I forgive you.”

“Don’t do that,” he pleaded.

Jane gripped his hand tighter, “you have made one mistake in your life. You hurt my feelings once
. You can make mistakes, you’re allowed to.”

“I knew better. I-I did it all on purpose–”

“I don’t believe that.” Jane’s tone was stern, unmoving and it pushed at him. Will bit down on his
lip.

“You should hate me.”

She was quiet, and Will was waiting for the shoe to drop. Eventually, she would see that he was
right and believe him.

“Do you hate me?” Jane whispered.

He shot his head up to look at her, “what? Of course I don’t.”

“Why? You called me when you needed help and I didn’t pick up, I ignored you when you needed
me. I made a mistake. Do you hate me?”

Will’s lips parted, catching the desperation in her eyes. He wanted to calculate an answer, and
somehow figure out the wording on why it was different. It was, she didn’t answer a phone call and
he masterminded a way to break everyone’s heart. Nothing about that was the same.
“No.” Was all he got out, knowing the fight would be never-ending if he let it continue.

A smile fell on her face, “see? Was that so hard?”

Will wanted to scream, but it was stuck inside. His body hated him, laughed at him as he tried to
run away from it. The jagged hole in his chest pulsed, teasing him with the idea of tucking itself
back together.

“I guess not,” he lied.

She squeezed his hand, “I’m gonna go help mom. Tell me if you need me please.”

Will only nodded, watching as she walked out of the room, a weight gone from her shoulders. The
movement all stopped, joy being sucked out right alone with her. He watched the door shut, the
new handle gleaming into his eyes.

It was silver, undented, and looked cold to the touch. Will stared, slowly realizing what was so
wrong with it.

There wasn’t a lock insight.

—-------

Will dreaded the idea of going back to school. He didn’t know what was awaiting him there. His
phone was broken, meaning any form of communication was cut. He’d asked his mom to tell
everyone he wasn’t feeling well so no visitors would come. Sadly, Will could only hide for so
long.

“Okay, mom told me that you need to be really careful.”

“I know,” he said, tugging down his sleeves for the tenth time. He knew no one could see his arm,
but the thought still left him on edge.
“Also, teachers know that you’re not supposed to use your hand either. I think you can just sit
there, which probably sounds boring but I bet it’ll be fine and–”

“Will?”

Both he and Jane turned, seeing Chrissy quickly walking up to them. Her eyes were blown wide,
face lighting up. Will stood there, not knowing what to do with the newfound attention. She hadn’t
spoken to him in two weeks.

“Hi,” he said. His voice pulled awkwardly.

She smiled, “I didn’t know you’d be back today. I got all of your classwork and was going to give
it to Jane, but I guess I can just give it to you. If you want it, I mean, you can ask yourself, but I
thought it’d be easier–”

“Yeah uh, thank you.” He cut off her rambling, being able to see her nervous jitters.

“Sorry, I was going to text you,” Jane said as they stood stiffly by his locker.

Chrissy waved her off, “it’s okay, don’t worry about it.”

He could see she was itching to say more, but Will didn’t give any opening to that. He didn’t know
how. Everything felt off like he had hopped into the wrong timeline and was stuck in some odd
dimension. He had just been alone for so long.

That’s what it was supposed to be, they’d all left. He understood that world. Created it himself.

Will glanced down at his arm, catching the bandaging for a moment. It clicked pretty easily. It was
guilt, that’s all he was looking at. They felt guilty for what happened to him.

“So, are you guys–”

“I need to use the bathroom,” he hurried out, eyes trained on the floor.

Neither of them had time to say anything as he walked off. Will wanted to breathe, but everywhere
he stepped the air was contaminated. He didn’t know what he was doing, the need to run away was
growing. Slowly the halls emptied, leading him to an unused part of the school. Will glanced
behind his shoulder for a moment, not losing his footing.

A gasp slipped out as he knocked into someone’s chest. Will brought his left hand up, gently
pressing it against the other person to steady himself. His fingers caught on to something familiar.
The necklace had a thin chain, but at the end, a yellow pendant sat. Unhurriedly, he lifted his gaze,
finding a pair of deep brown eyes looking right back at him.

Will’s lips parted. Mike’s stare had always been hard to be under, it never shifted. There was
unwavering power behind it that he became addicted to. He wasn’t sure why, most people
struggled to maintain contact, but it was like Mike found his focus and zeroed in, staring without
shame. The feeling of that left Will vibrating with vitality.

Mike’s expression was one of shock, and there was something else there he couldn’t read. Trying
to swallow the lump in his throat, Will’s heart pounded as if it was attempting to chase after its
other half.

He dropped his hand, releasing the necklace, and felt cold in seconds. Mike was frozen, a curl
slipping in front of his stare. Will couldn’t move, he’d never been herculean enough to step away at
the right time. For a moment, he remembered what Chrissy had said about them.

The sun and moon operated perfectly apart. Two sides of a working universe that would cause
catastrophic damage if they ever came together.

Mike’s face lost its pink tint, now pale without any sign of color. For a moment, the singer’s brows
pressed together, his eyes losing their walls. Then Mike’s gaze darted down to his right arm. Will
followed it, seeing that his shirt had ridden up.

He pulled it down swiftly, “oh um, I–”

That’s all he was able to get out before Mike walked past him, footsteps quick, not having uttered a
sound. Will listened as the bell rang, but found his feet glued down. He turned his head, watching
as Mike disappeared out of sight. The rings had found their way into Will’s chest and pulled at it,
the hole becoming an injury he couldn’t ignore. Will pieced together what expression he had
missed on Mike’s face, and it made his blood run cold.

Fear.
 Chapter 34
Chapter Notes

Before the Worst- The Script

“Will?” He called out, heart rate beginning to pick up. “Hey, are you in–”

Everything had stopped. Mike turned the corner. It was barely a pivot, the kitchen not being far
from the front door, but it felt like his life had flipped in an unsuspecting second. His muscles
shifted, face dropping, mouth parting as his lips became nothing but sandpaper.

It was horrifying how quickly things could change.

Mike sucked in a sharp breath, nausea rolling in his stomach. With blurry eyes, he scanned the
small area. There were shards of glass on the ground, surrounded by cheap-smelling beer. Though,
that was easy to sweep up. Just keep shoes on in the room for a while and open the windows to air
the smell out. Easy and forgettable in a few hours.

The blood. There was nothing that could ever erase the image from his mind. In seconds, Mike’s
life had been changed. No person should see that amount of blood.

No person should be losing that amount of blood.

Then Mike finally saw him. That was enough to break him in half, stomach finally erupting.

He let out a gag, trying to cover his mouth. Mike stared out the window, saliva threatening to drip
out as the stench of beer was overtaken by the iron scent of blood. So much crimson blood.

Will. That was Will’s blood.

An ambulance. He needed to get Will to the hospital.

When he pulled the phone out, the screen wouldn’t move. Mike pressed his finger down, tapping
with vigor. Panic rose in his chest as it dimmed.

“Mike.”

Lifting his head, Mike saw red. The room had changed, now glowing with the ominous color. His
phone fell to the floor, disappearing into the tile. Will’s face didn’t look right. It was grossly white,
his eyes bloodshot.

“Hey, everything is going to be fine, It’s alright I’ve got you.” He rushed forward, grabbing at
Will’s limp body. “Come on, come on you’re okay, just stay awake.”

“I’m going to die.”

Mike’s heart was racing, skin burning with terror. He cupped Will’s face, eyes widening as drops
of blood slipped from the boy’s mouth.

“No, no you’re not going to die, you’re okay–”

He felt the room spin, fluorescent light covering him.

“Mike! Mike, it hurts, please! Help me!”

The voice was muffled. Mike stumbled back against the wall, eyes moving wildly. He was outside
the room. Lines of white doors haunting him.

“No,” he breathed out, slowly looking towards his hands.

Blood, this time it was fresh, still dripping onto the floor.

“Mike! Mike!”
“No!” He covered his ears, “go away!”

The door in front of him shook, Will’s screams were choked and echoing through the never-ending
halls.

“Mike!”

His knees buckled, and it all went quiet. Mike dropped his hands, waiting to catch his breath.
That’s when he heard it. Flatline.

—-------

Sweat ran down his face, the sheets tangled and unusable. Mike darted his eyes around. He wasn’t
met with anything but a messy room. The blinds were being blown open, the vent under the
window circulating warm air.

Mike pushed the covers off, fumbling to turn on his lamp. With one breath, he looked down to his
hands, shoulders slumping when he was met with nothing but pale skin.

It wasn’t surprising. The dream had made itself known multiple times through the week, even
seeping into real life. Mike hated closing his eyes, it was him walking right into the jail cell that
was his mind.

Getting to his feet, Mike grabbed the guitar that was resting in the corner. The best way to get his
thoughts to shut up were to drown them out until he got hearing loss.

Plugging the amp into the wall, Mike turned it up, eyes still blurry.

“This ones for you New York,” he muttered to himself, voice dry.

The floor shook. That was the first sign it was probably a bad idea, but his sleep-addled brain
didn’t care about that. Mike couldn’t process the song he was playing, but it was loud enough to
make his eardrums crack. Closing his eyes, he leaned back on his desk chair and let the headache
come on.

That lasted for about two seconds before his amp was unplugged. Or it snapped from the power of
his sound waves.

“What on earth are you doing? It is three in the morning and you are lucky your father didn’t wake
up. How? I don’t know–”

“Did you check if he was dead?”

“ Micheal .” His mother cursed.

He looked at her. She wore a robe, slippers and a pair of socks on as well. Mike knew she ran cold,
but even looking at the get-up made him hot.

“Can you turn it back on now?”

“Absolutely not, it is the middle of the night. You need to be in bed–”

“I’m not tired.”

Her face lost its sharp lines, “honey, you look tired.”

“Thank you for that.”

“That’s not what I meant.”

Mike narrowed his eyes, “so what did you mean? Because it sounds like you’re saying I look like a
good for nothing bum–”
“You’re being ridiculous. I am just worried about you.” She pressed the door closed, her voice
dropping down.

“Well there is nothing to be worried about.”

Her lips pinched, “really?”

“What?”

“I’m trying honey. I really am. You’ve got to talk to me though, you have to open up if this is ever
going to get better. Both of us need to try and that’s what I’m doing right now, okay? So what is
going on?”

Mike looked at her, taking in the pleading gaze. Outside the night continued on, any watchful eyes
closed and far away. For months he’d dreamed about having his mother right there and paying
attention to him. Now he wanted nothing more than for her to disappear.

“Nothing is going on–”

“Sweetheart, I have been patient all week, I have, but I have a limit here. You look strung out,
you’ve barely been in school this week–” he opened his mouth to retort, “and don’t even try to lie
to me, because I know. I get the calls. The most concerning thing is you coming home covered in
blood after almost a day of me not being able to reach you. I’ve given you space, but I am your
mother and I can’t forget that; And now I’m getting woken up in the middle of the night to you
throwing some kind of concert? You’re gonna have to do better than ‘nothing’ Micheal.”

She sat on the edge of his bed, reaching out to grab his hand. Mike let her take it as he picked at the
skin on his finger.

“I’m here , okay? I am right here, you can talk to me, honey.” Her tone was softer, the authoritative
edge disappearing.

Mike blinked, looking away from her gaze. He didn’t want to cry, but looking at his mother’s soft
smile made him aware it was inevitable. Letting out a breath, he squeezed her hand.
“There was a boy.”

She squeezed back, “okay.”

He nodded, gnawing at his bottom lip and hoping it didn’t rip in half. His mom scooted closer,
slouching her posture. Mike knew it was her way of trying to be more inviting.

“Can you tell me about this boy?”

Mike wiped his eyes, “well um, he has brown hair and hazel eyes. Green eyes. Um, he likes to
draw, but never lets me see any of his work. I think he’s good, he seems like someone that would
be good at least. I think his favorite color is yellow.”

“Did he tell you that?”

He shook his head, “no. No he uh, he uses a lot of yellow folders, and we went to the mall once he
always stopped in front of yellow jewelry or clothes. I have this necklace he– I don’t know, he
never bought anything. When I first saw him he reminded me of a puppy–”

“A puppy?” She said with a warm laugh.

Mike’s mouth twitched, “yeah. Kind of like the ones that always looked like you kicked them even
when you’re giving them a treat? The dramatic ones.”

“The sad ones,” she added.

His smile faltered, “yeah.”

“Well what else? Now I've gotta know everything.” She reached up and swiped a thumb under his
eye. Mike felt his chest convulse at the motion. He could tell she understood. Her eyes were
watered, but he could see the opening. An invitation.

Mike felt himself break, “He has this same pair of converse he wears constantly. They’re beat up
and barely white, but he won’t take them off. Sometimes I think they might be the only one’s he’s
got, but I’d never say that. He um, he doesn’t like sad movies or– he doesn’t actually like live
action stuff at all, but loves cartoons. I figured that out after we watched our third movie together
and he was all tense. He has this really horrible car that never works, but he keeps trying anyway.”

“Really?” She laughed, her face bright.

Mike sniffed, “yeah, yeah I don’t know why, it’s a piece of sh– junk. Um, he really likes cats, but
only the hairless ones. One of the only things he actually told me. He’d get excited when he drove
by them or saw them in stuff. He would talk about how no one likes them because they’re kind of
ugly, but he thinks they’re the smartest breed.”

“Why?”

“Don’t know, said they reminded him of the cat from Coraline. Then I asked him if he liked the
movie, and he only said ‘sometimes’ and I don’t really know what that means. He’s really quiet but
gets annoyed easily, he doesn’t smile a lot. He shuffles when he walks, never picks up his feet and
it drives Max insane but I think it's funny.” Tears rolled down his cheeks, “He doesn’t like being
touched most of the time, but let me hug him. He’d never say anything and just…got it I guess. It
made me feel like I wasn’t– like I wasn’t some kind of burden. He’s really smart and likes interior
design.”

Mike rubbed his nose, eyes pressed close as the memories came back.

“Honey?”

“And he called me last week needing help and I didn’t take it seriously enough. I got there and
there was b-blood everywhere and a little pile of glass he fell on. I know it looked worse than it
was, I-I know that.” Mike let out a sob, “but there was so much and I thought he was going to die. I
thought– then I saw him and he was okay, he was just walking and was fine, but I couldn’t see that.
I saw his body lying there again a-and I freaked out and ran away from him. Now I keep seeing it
over and over again a-and–”

“Michael honey, come here,” she pulled him off the chair and into her arms. Mike fell, being held
as he broke down. The curdling fear drifted away and he was met with nothing but her warm touch.
“I’m so sorry. I’m sorry.”
“I’m being stupid, I wasn’t even the one that got hurt–”

She cupped his face, “look at me. You did get hurt, alright? I can’t imagine what it would have
been like seeing that. That’s really scary. Seeing someone you care about in pain like that is
something no one should ever have to go through. Do you want to talk to someone about it? We
can–”

Mike shook his head, “no, no not right now. I just feel so stuck, like it’s never going to get better
and I’m going to end up hurting him because I can’t…mom, I can’t even look at him.”

“Okay, and do you know why you might be feeling like that?” She ran a hand through his hair,
“are you scared of him?”

“No.”

“Are you scared something else is going to happen to him?”

He wrapped his arms tighter around her, “I think so, but I should want to see him, to make sure
he’s okay.”

“Sweetheart, what happened was traumatic. For both of you. Something that is important to
remember is that he is okay, right? He’s okay, and walking around. I’m not saying you need to talk
to him, but he is the only person who is going to be able to make you feel better.”

Mike sighed, “I don’t know if I can.”

“So, are you going to reveal this boy’s name?” His mother asked, the question delicate.

“No.”

“And why not?”

“Because then everything I told you is real.”

“It’s real anyways. Hiding isn’t going to change that.” She kissed his head, “and you know, a girl or
a boy, it will never make a difference to me, okay? I know you’re not saying anything, but I just
want you to know.”

Mike felt a rope in his heart loosen. It was a secret he never planned to tell his parents, and still
didn’t have the guts to say it outloud, but the tear had been made now.

“His name is Will.”

“Will.” She nodded, “that’s a nice name.”

“It fits him.” He paused, “I feel like I don’t know anything about him.”

“What? You just told me so much–”

“It doesn’t count,” Mike said, sitting up, “he never tells– told me stuff, I just had to figure it out.
Whenever I’d ask him a simple question he’d freeze up and act like he was being interrogated so I
stopped.”

“Well, did he feel like he was being interrogated?”

“I don’t know. If I ask him if he feels like he’s being interrogated he’d get all defense and say stuff
like, ‘what made you say that? I never said that’ and then I’d have to be like, ‘yeah I know you
didn’t say that but you’re acting like that’ and he’d say ‘I’m not acting like anything you’re making
stuff up’ and I’d say ‘I’m not making it up, you’re being weird’ and he’d say ‘now you’re making
me not want to talk to you at all’ and then I’d–”

“Okay, yes I got it, thank you honey.” She patted his arm.

Mike sent her a tiny smile, “sorry.”

“Usually when people have those reactions it's not because they want to be difficult. I know it can
be frustrating for you, but I bet it’s a lot harder for him.”

“I don’t want anything to be harder for him.”

She pulled a blanket over his shoulders, “and I love that about you, but that’s not something you
can control. Just because someone isn’t super open doesn’t mean they’re made of steel. I had a
friend in highschool that was really stubborn, she drove me insane sometimes. She struggled in
English and I happened to be good at that, so I’d always offer to help. Not once did she let me. I
thought it was something to do with her pride, but I found out that she just didn’t want to seem
dumb, got insecure about asking for help. That’s a really hard word for some people.”

“What, English 101?” He muttered, curling against her side.

She snorted, “no. Help.”

“Help.”

“People who never got it don’t ask for it.”

Mike thought back to something he almost missed that day. The bleeding had taken up most of his
attention, but the bruises on Will’s neck always stayed in the back of his mind. Trying to think
about what might have happened before he got there was sickening.

“Your friend might just be a tricky little puzzle. Instead of being five-hundred pieces he’s like…
two- thousand pieces.”

“That’s gonna take forever,” he said, letting out a small laugh.

She nodded, “maybe, but those kinds of puzzles are the prettiest when they’re done.”

“When did you become a poet?”

“Oh stop, now go to bed. You have a gig tomorrow right?”

Mike felt his chest warm, “you remembered.”

She stood up, pecking his cheek, “of course. I was going to tell you this later, but your father and I
are going to get Holly tomorrow. We think it’ll be better if she comes home. I’m going to work in
the mornings so he can drop her off, then I’ll leave early–”

Before she could finish, Mike threw himself into her arms, “really?”

“I don’t wanna mess her up too.”

“You didn’t mess me up, mom,” he said.

“No I guess not, you did a great job on your own, but I’m going to be better. I promised, right?”

He squeezed her tighter, “right. I love you.”

“Oh honey, I love you too. I’m always here if you need to talk, okay?”

“I know.”

For the first time, Mike actually believed it.

—-------

“You went to therapy with your mom? Like, couples therapy but with parents–”

“Shut up, we just talked.”

Max smirked, “I’m messing with you.”

“I’m trying to be vulnerable and you’re ruining it.”

Mike never liked playing at house parties. It meant they had to stay after a mingle while people
gave them the same three compliments.

“When you mention your mom I just can’t help myself–”

“Woah, we’re talking about Wheeler’s mom? You know we’re together right?” Robin said,
walking into the room with Vickie on her arm.

“Ew, don’t make jokes about Mike’s mom,” Vickie retorted, her face screwed up in disgust.

“Yes, thank you Vickie.”

Eddie’s head popped in, “we talking about Mrs. Wheeler–”

“No,” Mike snapped before the sentence could finish.

“Hey, do we know who lives here?” Max asked, pulling her hair into a braid.

“No, but they’ve got a shit ton of money. All the rooms have waterbeds,” Robin said.

Vickie nodded, “don’t know why, waterbeds are the worst. How can you even sleep like that?”

“I know right? Who would want to feel like they’re on the Titanic every night,” Eddie pulled on his
leather jacket, cuffing the sleeves.

Max nudged his shoulder, “I’m glad you talked to your mom, you seem better.”
“Thanks,” he said, sending her a smile.

“Are we ready to get out there?” Robin clapped, jumping up and down.

Mike pulled himself off the couch, picking up his guitar. He seemed to be the only one not buzzing
with excitement.

The main room was dim, sun having fallen hours ago due to the winter months. People clapped,
they always did, but he tuned it out. Robin had now taken up the position of introducing them,
which he didn’t have any issue with.

“Hey guys! Thanks for having us and everything.” Everyone laughed as if they were at a comedy
show. Mike resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

He cleared his throat, situating the microphone. Robin started on the piano, giving them the go
ahead.

“It’s been a while since the two of us talked. About a week since the day that you walked.”

Mike lifted his head, trying not to blow a hair out of his eye.

“Knowing things would never be the same with your empty heart and mine full of pain. So explain
to me how it came to this.”

He glanced around, fingers feeling raw as he played the chords. Any middle of the night jam
sessions he planned in the future definitely needed to be postponed. The rings around his fingers
itched, clothes touching him at all the wrong spots.

“Saying things that we never heard. Oh, who would have thought it would end up like this?”

Maybe someday Will would become invisible in a crowd, another face he passed by. Mike caught
those eyes before they were focused on him, and his over-sensitive mind halted.
“Before the worst, before we met. Before our hearts decide it's time to love again.”

That seemed to be the trigger, and Mike wasn’t careful enough when pulling it. Will had just been
walking in the back, Lucas not far in front of him. For a moment, he was sure it was a
hallucination. With Will, that seemed like a real possibility. When he sang again, he got the
attention he was terrible at hiding from.

Will looked right at him, his big eyes gleaming in the almost dark room. That same terror from the
other day came back. Will was there, he was fine. Mike couldn’t even see his arm due to the two
layers he had on, but the logic changed nothing. The screams that only existed in his head came
out. The pleading in Will’s voice only for Mike to stand there and do nothing.

“Before the…Before…” The room went deadly quiet, and Mike’s mouth felt like putty. Slowly, the
music came to a halt as he stood there.

Will’s eyes darted down, but Mike continued to stare until the microphone dropped from his hand,
screeching as it went. He sucked in a gasp, looking around the shocked room.

“I’m sorry.” Mike stumbled back, almost falling onto Eddie’s drums. “I-I’m sorry.”

“Mike!”

He ignored the yells for him, hurrying from the spotlight. Mike pushed past the frozen people until
he made it to an empty hallway, mindlessly throwing open the bathroom door and locking himself
in. His cheeks were flushed, making it seem like he was running a fever.

“You’re such a fucking idiot, oh my god ,” he said to himself, yanking on his hair. It didn’t sit
right, everything felt wrong.

Those eyes were warm. Alive. Still, all Mike could do was run. They haunted his mind, the green
hypnotizing him and making it impossible to think of anything else. The red faded, it was never
meant to be a color Will associated with. It was too harsh, holding a cutting power that was feared.

Mike licked his bottom lip, trying to take a full breath. Leaving the bathroom seemed like hell after
the stunt he pulled. Whatever questions came he’d have no adequate answers.
A tiny knock hit the door. He turned from the mirror and reluctantly pulled it open. A lie was on
the tip of his tongue, expecting to see Eddie or one of the others standing there.

“I–” lifting his head, Mike’s words were lost.

Those eyes. There was no blood now. It was just Will.

It had always just been Will.

“Sorry, I know you probably don’t want to talk to me, but you kind of– I feel like that was my
fault, I shouldn’t have come I just–” Mike took a step closer, the restraints lost, “what are you
doing–”

It was easier than it should have been. He cupped the back of Will’s head, pulling the boy into his
arms. The swimming fear in front of him found its release. A trembling breath escaped as Mike
dug his face into Will’s shoulder. Trying to be gentle, he wrapped his arms around the brunette's
waist, holding him so close Will’s back arched, their chests meshing together.

“Oh,” Will whispered, and slowly Mike felt him return the touch. It was magnetic, weeks of
holding onto a rope, trying to climb away from what he truly wanted disappeared. Even if it was
only for a passing second.

He shuffled back, not releasing his hold and pulled Will into the bathroom, kicking the door shut.
The sight felt too intimate, and Mike feared someone would find them there gripping onto each
other in the hallway.

“You’re okay.” Mike’s voice was muffled against the boy’s sweatshirt.

“Mhm.” Will hummed, his tone strained.

That made his worry spike. He pulled back, hand still on the back of Will’s head, keeping them
close.
“Are you alright? Did I hurt you?”

Will's eyes were wide, “no.”

“Okay,” he breathed out. Quickly, he kissed the side of Will’s head, tugging the boy back into his
arms.

“We should– we can’t just do this now–”

Mike clenched his eyes, “one minute. I just need you for one minute.”

There was a beat of silence, and Mike heard Will’s mind moving. Then he felt his embrace
returned.

“Okay, one minute.”

Mike knew it couldn’t be any longer. Time couldn’t freeze forever, nor could it go back to the
beginning; But for one moment it didn’t matter. It would never be the same again, and he’d have to
know about what they had lost to each other. That was all for later, he deserved one minute.

Just one minute.

 Chapter 35
Chapter Notes

Dreams and Visions- Tony Anderson

TW: Mentions of abuse/memories of abuse. Just be cautious while reading this chapter
please.

The pencil in his hand was heavy. Will tried to balance it, not allowing the thin object to slip out
again. His chest was tight, frustration having seeped in hours ago. Will’s thumb shook, even
though it was a small movement Taking a breath, he placed the pencil down on the paper, ignoring
the jagged lines he had already created.

“Come on,” he muttered, pressing the tip harder.

He was supposed to be practicing letters, but found himself trying to make a circle. When Will had
first started drawing, he prided himself on his smooth movements. After about a year of practice,
his shapes came out looking computer automated instead of from a child's hand.

With careful eyes, he watched. The line went straight up, the control teetering. When he got closer
to the top, his pointer finger flinched, kicking the pencil line away from its destination.

“Fuck,” Will cursed. He crumbled up the paper, wanting it out of his sight.

His hand was unrecognizable. The thick scar started at his wrist and ran all the way up to his
middle finger. It was haunting, and as Will stared longer, he was sure the injury laughed, knowing
exactly what it had taken from him.

“Everything okay?”

Dropping his hand, Will glanced at his now open door.

“Yeah, everything’s fine.”

His mom sent him a pitiful smile, “you can get the stitches out monday, that’s good right?”

“Yeah.”

“Baby, you can talk to me. It might help–”

He cut her off, “everything is fine mom, I don’t need help.”

Will kept his eyes casted down, knowing he’d disappointed her was enough, he didn’t need to see it
too.

“Okay well, Jane said Dustin is going to be here soon.”

“Right, thanks.”

She walked out, the door clicking shut. Will had tried to find a way out of going, luckily he
couldn’t play, but he was expected to be at the last game for moral support. He knew most of the
team was angry with him, as he was expected to solidify their win. It was his job, he was supposed
to be the captain. At least now he could fail his father one last time.

“Will, he’s here!”

He stood, glancing towards the half deflated football in the corner. It had been a gift for his
eleventh birthday, not having left his room since. Will grabbed the sharpened pencil.

"You're too weak, your mother did this to you that fucking-- if you ain't good at something, you keep
going until it hurts, you get that?"

Shakily, he bent to his knees, his hand flinching as he tightened around the object. Will closed his
eyes and shot it down, hoping to hear the air be choked out.
All he was met with with a snapped tip, the pencil too weak to make a dent.

“You’re a stupid boy, you know that?”

“Will come one!”

“So fucking stupid.”

The color in his vision dimmed. Will took a step backwards, feeling like he’d been locked in a
horrifying hypnotic state.

“Will!”

“Push yourself until you're throwin' up.”

He walked out of the room, struggling to find the door. Will drifted his eyes around, and saw that
the walls were moving. It was slow, something melancholy about each dripping shift. He was
locked in a fun house, mirrors of all heights and shapes mocking him. The pictures slipped out of
sight, oozing off the paint. There was a photo to the left of him smiling, front tooth missing. Will
watched as his eyes turned to black pits, the brown being sucked back.

“You will never be anything but the fucking baby your mother raised, you get that? You think you
can get in my face and yell at me?”

“Will, oh my god, are you coming?”

He looked forward, seeing Jane standing there with her hip jutted out.

“What?” He breathed out.

“Hey, are you okay?”

Looking back to the wall, he found it stable. Pictures right back in place, cleaned off. Will stared at
himself, wanting to reach out and scratch his face off until that kid disappeared.

“I’m fine.”

“But you fucked it all up! Just like you always do.”

Jane’s face pinched, “hey, you look kind of–”

Her hand came closer and he flinched, looking down and seeing blood. Will stared at the cut, it
was sickeningly similar to his own. Nearly identical.

“What is that?”

“Oh, I painted my nails. Does it look bad or something?”

Will blinked, trying to get his eyes to focus. Her hand was pale, no marks in sight. Her nails shined
a bright red color, catching in the light.

“No,” he looked away, “no it looks good, sorry.”

“You did hurt me! It doesn’t matter what you wanted to do.”

“Okay, we should go, Dustin is parked out front.”

Will nodded, not saying another word. He followed after her, gaze locking on the kitchen. His body
laid there, beer slipping into the vents and intoxicating the house. Thick ropes of blood wrapped
around his throat, pulling him down into the tile.

“I grabbed you a jacket too!”

His chest wasn’t moving. Will made eye contact with himself, seeing that there was no life there
anymore as he was sucked into the floor.

“Come on!”

Will saw the car there and walked towards it. He felt for the handle, sliding into the vehicle.

“Hey, you okay Will?” Dustin asked, glancing back at him through the rear view mirror.

“I’m fine.”

“Are you sure–”

“I’m fine.”

The window needed to be cleaned. Smudges made it hard to see out of. Will tilted his head to the
side, noticing the finger prints decorating the glass. Each one looked different, the thin lines
proving each touch was from a new person.

“Do you clean your windows?” He breathed out, catching sight of the shed as they pulled out of the
driveway.

“I’ll lock you in here all fucking night! That what you want?”

Dustin snorted, “you saying I need a carwash?”

“I don’t think it’ll wash off.”

The car door locked, and Will listened to the click. He touched the handle, wanting to tug it and
see if he had the ability to escape.
“Why, is there a dent or something?” Jane asked, messing with the radio.

All he heard was static.

“What?”

“A dent, is there a dent Will.”

He looked forward.

“No.”

If there was a dent, it would be easier to break the glass. To get out, if he had a dent he could hit
the dent and run, dig the glass right back into his skin as he went.

“We’re gonna get our asses beat tonight,” Dustin said.

Jane rolled her eyes, “you guys will be fine.”

“Without Will out there we’re fucked, Coach knows it too.” Dustin glanced back at his, “Jason is
so pissed by the way, it’s hilarious.”

“Why?” He asked, not being able to find interest.

“Because you being gone means I have to play, and we all know I’m shit.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, thanks a lot by the way, it’s your fault we’re in this fucking mess.”
Will’s stomach launched, “what did you say?”

“I said it’s not your fault, we’ll handle the mess,” Dustin said, looking back at him with confusion.

“Right, sorry.”

The sky was cloudy, sun locked away. Will watched the trees stop flying by, all of them freezing in
place. With the engine still reeling, he looked forward, seeing that the other two didn’t seem to
notice their frozen surroundings. Will caught sight of the tree closest to his window, the once
bright leaves turned gray, mold dripping from the branches. All of them began to melt, becoming
black tare.

“Will, we’re here.”

He blinked and it was all gone. The school overtook his view.

“Are you just going to fucking sit there? You’re wasting our time.”

Will looked to his sister, “I’m sorry.”

“What?”

“I um,” he cleared his throat, “I didn’t hear you, sorry.”

“Oh, I said we can sit here if you need a second.”

Will opened the door and stepped out, cool winds slithering over his face. The other two stared at
him, their eyes big and questioning, no malice in sight.

“You look a little pale,” Dustin said, eyebrows pressed with worry.

“Just cold, I’m fine.”

“Alright if you’re sure. We should head in, we’re already late.”

He let them walk in front of him, eyes casting back towards the trees. They stood unmoving,
orange leaves tumbling to the grass. As he looked further into the woods, Will saw the mold
growing, hidden from oblivious eyes.

“Max said they’re sitting closer to the field.” Jane took his arm, guiding him through crowds of
other students. “Dustin had to run back, so just us now.”

“Okay.”

“Hey, if you want to go home we don’t have to stay the whole time.”

Will looked down at her, “it’s fine.”

“You’re gonna run that word dry.”

“What?” He asked.

“Ya know, ‘I’m fine’ is kinda your thing.”

“Oh.”

Will couldn’t hear the voices around him, they were background characters, paid to keep their
mouths shut. He couldn’t see their faces, it was as if someone came in and erased them, leaving an
unfinished product in their wake.

“Hey guys!” Eddie’s voice was billowing, leaving ripples in Will’s stagnant mind.

Trying to get his eyes to focus, Will found the others. Jane walked closer, and he had no choice but
to be yanked behind her.
Max sent him an awkward smile, “hey.”

“Someone like you isn’t going to be the one that breaks him, I won’t let you.”

“Hi.” He got out, looking away from the redhead.

“Did you guys see Mike when you were coming up here?” Robin asked.

Mike . He’d love to see Mike. As he sat down, the chill in his body left, he could feel Mike’s arms
around him, warmth radiating through his bones. It had only lasted a minute, but Will held onto the
feeling with desperation. That was all he had left.

“Do you think he’d really want to sit up here? I mean, the second I said Will’s name he practically
ran away. I don’t blame him either, I'd get out too if I could.”

He looked at Max, eyes wide, “did he say that?”

“That he had to go to the bathroom? I mean, it wasn’t some big announcement, but yeah.”

Will looked down at his hands, he heard it, the truth was itching in the background and falling into
his lap. They all thought he had no idea.

“Oh, there he is.”

“You’re so selfish, I can’t believe I didn’t see it.”

Mike’s smile twitched when they made eye contact.

“Uh, hey.”
“You are fucking pathetic.”

“Hi,” he whispered back, trying to get his mouth to work. Mike was wearing a sweatshirt, curls
blowing and making him look like some kind of angel; but his eyes were wrong. Will couldn’t see
anything behind them, the brown wiped clean of any dimension.

“Is um, is everything okay?” Mike asked, clearing his throat as he took a seat.

Will kept his eyes forward, “yeah, fine.”

“I’m seriously going to start counting how many times you say that,” Jane said from her spot next
to Robin.

“Hey, you see them?” Max jumped up with excitement.

Both teams were scattered on the field, and there was a blank spot. Will focused on it, knowing he
was supposed to be standing there. He balled his hand into a fist, digging his fingernails into the
skin below them.

“So Byers, you miss being out there?” Eddie asked, plopping down on the other side of him.

“Eddie, maybe–”

He cut Mike off, “I don’t know.”

“Well I’m sure they'll let you toss the ball after, you deserve it after all the shit you put all of us
through. It would be much easier for everyone if this game took you out, too bad isn’t it?”

Will let out a breath. He knew it wasn’t real, they’d never say it to his face. None of it was real. He
glanced at the long-haired drummer, who was staring back with some sort of anticipation.

“Not one for jokes then,” Eddie shifted uncomfortably as Will stared.
“I can’t hear you,” he whispered, noticing how the others went quiet.

“Really? That doesn’t really seem possible.” Eddie laughed, obviously trying to ease the tension.

“I’m sorry.”

“Oh! Oh no it’s fine, I just made a joke about balls– you know what? It doesn’t matter.”

Will nodded, slowly taking it in, “okay.”

“Hey Will, are you sure everythings okay?” Robin asked, turning around.

He glanced around, finding their eyes directed at him. Will saw the same thing five times,
something dead, a lie sucking at them that was right under the surface. The earth moved, vines
inching out of the ground and getting ready to engulf him.

“Yeah.”

That didn’t seem to sedate anyone, but Will focused on the field. Mike sat close, their arms
brushing together. Not daring to move, he made his posture stiff, terrified of what would happen if
he got any closer.

“Just one minute. I need you for one minute.”

That minute has passed, and he could never go back to it.

“Shit, they’re doing terrible,” Max said.

Jane nodded, “yeah, we should go see them after this quarter ends.”
Looking at the fake grass, Will saw it begin to die. It should have been impossible, the fakeness
that surrounded the game kept everything bright and alive. The weeds were spinning out now, and
Will was just out of reach of their hands.

“Will.” Mike’s voice was so soft, it was rare for him to hold such delicacy with his words. Mike
said his name very nicely. He liked it.

“Will,” he breathed out, the name feeling wrong on his own tongue. He didn’t say it right at all,
Mike would probably hate him for that.

If he didn’t already that is. Which he did, Will could never forget the poisoned word.

“I hate you and everything about you.”

“Yeah, yeah hey can you look at me?” Mike whispered, “look at me, come here.”

He did as he was asked, turning until their eyes strung together. Mike’s face lost its sharp structure,
now riddled with worry.

“What is it?” He asked.

Mike titled his head, “I hate you, you know that?”

“What?”

“I said you look sick, have you eaten anything?”

Will swallowed, “I’m not hungry.”

“That’s not a great answer.”

“I’m fine.”

“Neither is that one,” Mike said.

Help me.

“Nothing is wrong.”

Mike’s voice dipped, “I don’t believe you.”

“Hey guys, let's head down now.” Robin hopped up as both teams wandered off the field.

Will found his out and stood, following the others down to hell. Maybe if he had stayed put, things
would have ended up differently. For once, he would have made the right choice in staying away.
The vines were too close, and he couldn’t turn back as the first one wrapped around his ankle.

“Hey guys,” Lucas ran up to them, helmet held in hand.

“How’s it going?” Jane asked.

“We’re dying.” Steve came up, a scowl on his face, “and Jason won’t shut the fuck–”

“Byers! Look who decided to show up.”

Will should have hidden.

“Speak of the devil.”

Jason tossed an arm around his shoulder, “you’re looking better, why don’t you throw on your
uniform and get out there?”
“I can’t Jason–”

“Ah come on Byers! We need ya,” another guy said, walking up to the growing circle.

Their voices filtered in, mocking him, as if they knew the fear welling inside his chest. Will looked
down at the ball in Jason’s hand. It was bruised with grass stains, specked with some dirt, but
strong enough to pull Will down into the ground. His grave waiting for him to take the wrong
step.

“Guys, knock it off–”

“Come on Harrington, it’s a fucking cut he can stil play,” Jason’s held his arm tighter, “don’t want
to disappoint, right Byers?”

“The fuck is your problem man–”

“Oh, the singer is back, how great is that?” Jason pushed the ball into Will’s hands.

“You’re fucking pathetic.”

“Couldn’t wait to come see you rub dicks with a bunch of other guys–”

“I didn’t want you to begin with, you stupid fucking boy.”

“Oh that’s rich coming from you, isn’t it? Aren’t you the one interested in that, Wheeler?”

Will’s hand twitched, the football, carving itself into his skin. He could only watch as it sunk into
him, burning into the scar that broke him.

“Come on Byers! Toss it–”

“You can play, just one more game–”

“And I hate you, I-I hate you and everything about you and I hate you.”

Will flung his hand open, watching as the ball tumbled down. The ground sucked it up, the gaping
hole growing and waiting for him to fall in.

“The hell did you do that for?”

His stomach rolled, nausea stabbing at him. Will felt beads of sweat on his forehead, vision blurred
as he tried to catch the people around him. The mold grew closer, trees spinning in circles as Will
stayed frozen.

He stumbled back, trying not to gag.

Run, he needed to run. Will pushed past everyone surrounding him and did just that, barely being
able to see.

The route was one he’d take millions of times, the bathroom door cracked open. It had been
waiting there, a sinister smile on the handle as he threw himself inside.

Will collapsed to his knees, wanting to feel them bleed as he gripped the toilet. Breathing harshly,
he tried to force it out, that desperation inside of him for it to all be gone was snapping, leaving a
dug out hole in his stomach.

“Let me go,” he muttered, a gag causing his back to seize up, “l-let me go.”

“you fucking hate me! You hate me, you piece of shit!”

Will clenched his eyes shut, throwing up as his mind taunted him.

“Shut up!” He choked out, screams bouncing in his head.

 They weren’t hiding anymore. Every word, every single time he had been ripped open was sitting
right there, waiting to give its performance. The comedy show began.

“You’re so selfish, I can’t believe I didn’t see it.”

“Let me go! Let me g-go, let me go.” He couldn’t breathe, acid burning his throat.

“But you fucked it all up! Just like you always do.”

“Will!”

“Push yourself until you're throwin' up.”

It wasn’t enough. It would never be enough. When a hand touched his shoulder, he jolted away,
horrified to see who it belonged to.

“Will, hey you need to try and breathe–”

“Let me go, let m-me go, let me go, p-please please let me go,” he begged, collapsing onto his
side, watching as the room spun.

“Someone like you isn’t going to be the one that breaks him, I won’t let you.”

The hand around his throat was tight, trying to get him to shut up. Will clawed at it, knowing it
would do nothing to save him.

Faces flashed in front of him, but he could barely make them out. Someone grabbed onto him,
pushing him back against their chest.

“Lucas, what the hell is going on–”

“It’s like talking to a fucking wall.”

Will sobbed. That was it, that’s all he knew how to do. The tears came, soaking him. It reminded
him of an Alice in Wonderland scene, and where he had been sure it was unrealistic to flood the
ocean, Will now hoped he didn’t drown the school.

“I don’t want to do this anymore, let me out, please,” he begged, pressing down in Lucas’ arms. “P-
Please, please I want to be done, I’m d-done.”

“Do we need to call an ambulance–”

Will tried to thrash away, “stop touching me! Let me go, let me go!”

“Call his mom.”

“But–”

“Max, now !”

“What’s going on?”

Will gagged, feeling his body being pushed back towards the toilet. The motions were choppy and
shocks of red popped into his vision, sweat now covering his body.

“Everyone h-hates me, I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m–” He bent forward again, crying in
pain as nothing came up, “I don’t want to do t-this anymore…please let me go, p-please.”

“Will, Will hey look at me.”

Mike.
“Leave me a-alone, pathetic– leave me alone! Leave me a-alone–” He sobbed, voice shriveled and
louder than he’d ever let it be before.

The snap had been right there for years, it found its time and the mask Will had crafted dripped off.
Now sat the ugly truth, the face that was indented with tear tracks. He had tried for so long, and it
didn’t matter. The useless child sat there, begging to be released from years of agony.

He didn’t expect anyone to save him. Will wasn’t someone to be saved.

Not anymore.

“Holy fuck, what did we do?” Someone whispered.

“Will, Will please, please,” Mike’s voice cracked, “stop fighting me–”

“No, n-no no, just let me g-go, I hate you! I hate y-you, I hate…I hate you,” he cried, beating
against Mike’s chest as he was dragged away from the toilet.

“I know, I know it’s okay.”

“I hate you, I hate you. I hate e-everyone,” his motions faltered, body slumping into Mike’s chest
as every inch of him gave out. “I’m done, I– I don’t want to do this anymore.”

“Okay, okay shh. I’ve got you,” Mike ran a hand through his sweaty hair as people spoke around
them. Their words were urgent, but they weren’t speaking in a language he understood.

“Will, we’re here okay? It’s okay,” Lucas’ voice was close, a firm hand on his back.

He tried to breathe, curling up like a child as Mike pulled him close. Tears stained the floor, a
reminder that he could never run away. They were like ropes, keeping him tied down and
vulnerable.
“Let me go.”

Mike tensed, “I’m sorry.”

Just for one minute.

“Help m-me.”

Mike held him tighter, “we will.”

Something else must have happened, he knew his mom was there, Jane coming along seconds
later; but he didn’t move, there was nothing else for him to do. Will had no idea who he was. The
vines had taken him down, giving him the truest form of torture. They had shattered him, making
it impossible to hide any longer. Yet, he was stuck, unable to find new meaning. The leash was
around his neck and finally made the choice to suffocate him.

Will was always meant to lose, and the race had finally ended.
 Chapter 36
Chapter Notes

marjorie- Taylor Swift

His thoughts felt locked away, completely detached from the body that used to home him. Will
stared at the closed window, wincing from the small amount of light shining through. There was an
easy fix to it, all he had to do was stand up and finally pull them completely shut. The easy
movement would finally seal him away.

Will wanted that, but not quite enough.

The bed was cold, no blanket able to do the job. Will didn’t know how long he’d been there,
staring at nothing and waiting for the final tear to dry. It should have been embarrassing to lie
there, to not have the willingness to come out of hiding. Maybe if there was any of him left, that
humiliation would eventually come; But for the time being, there was nothing.

“Will, honey, can you eat for me?”

A hand touched his back, and Will almost feared it would shoot right through him. His body was
ghostly, no longer existing as a full being.

Another voice came from the doorway, “Mom, I tried earlier he won’t–”

“Well, we have to keep trying. That is all we can do right now.”

“He won’t say anything, mom.” Jane’s voice was raw, rubbed dry with exhaustion.

Will knew it was his fault, and one day he’d apologize. When he got out, he’d find a way to fix it
all. They’d forget they ever saw him as anything less than perfect.

“He can still hear us, the doctor told me we need–”

“I don’t give a shit what she said, it’s been four days mom, we need–”

“Jane, that is enough ,” His mom said, her tone firm.

He should have spoken up, but it didn’t seem worth it. Eventually, their conversation faded to
silence and Will was left alone once again.

The window probably needed to be cleaned, he couldn’t remember the last time he’d touched it.
Maybe it could use some new blinds too. He didn’t mind the color black, it matched everything,
blocked out light when needed.

Something must have been wrong with his specific blinds. They weren’t doing their job. The light,
it was still there, drifting into his eyes. He reached a hand up, the bright ray tickling his fingers.
There was something cute about it, and if Will looked long enough he could make out a pair of
eyes. They didn’t have one specific color, but a mix of every one imaginable.

When Will dropped his hand, the light's face looked sad. He wanted to tell it to go outside, that he
would be okay. Nothing so pure deserved to be locked away with him. Dipping his finger up once
more, his lips twitched. It reflected against his skin, sending a hug of warmth through his arm. A
smile, he made it smile.

The door creaked out, “baby, there’s someone here to see you.”

It seemed that she knew an answer wasn’t coming. A few moments later his door was being shut,
but Will knew someone else had stepped into the room.

A flash of red popped into his vision, catching nicely on the light.

“You look better than I thought you’d look.” Her voice was closer than the others had been, itching
near the barrier he’d struggled to build.

Max.
She sat down by the bed, “that’s supposed to be a compliment by the way, usually people look way
worse. I did.”

Will blinked, taking in her expression. She was nervous, but he couldn’t find any pity. Maybe it
was because she didn’t like him very much. That look his mother and sister kept giving him wasn’t
there. It was just Max as he’d always seen her.

“Why?” He whispered, voice coming out in one puff.

Max shot her eyes over to him. They were wide, taken back in a way he hadn’t been expecting.
They stared for a moment, and Will was beginning to regret speaking in the first place.

“Oh um, I guess I was easier to break.” She paused, glancing at him.

Will pulled the blanket closer, waiting for her to continue. At the moment he wasn’t really sure
where she came from, but the light seemed to like her. Max had a type of face that absorbed it.

“People have been trying to get you to talk for days and this is what got your attention?” She asked,
scoffing, “pretty shallow, Byers. Never took you for the nosey kind.”

“Days?”

She nodded, “yeah. Lucas has been here everyday, but your mom wouldn’t let everyone crowd
inside or anything. You kind of scared the shit out of us. I wasn’t even going to come, I mean, no
one else got through to you, why the hell would I– at least now I get to rub it in Mike’s face, that’s
always great, right?”

“Mike?” He said, the name feeling like a breath of air.

Max nodded, “yeah, he was here. Do you remember?”

He shook his head. Faces blurred in his mind, none of them coming out and making themselves
known. Maybe they all needed to get brighter hair.
“Well, I’ll keep that our secret then.” Max cleared her throat, “so, I wasn’t really expecting you to
say anything, my plan was to just sit here and say that I tried.”

“You can do that,” he said, eyes moving towards the window.

She let out an amused snort, “god this is so weird.”

Will noticed the crack of light growing, the wind from the vent pushing the blinds away. It hasn’t
hit his face yet, dancing around it as if the action was purposeful. Max was looking at him, he
could feel it, but couldn’t find it in himself to meet her eye.

“What happened?”

If he was going to talk to someone, she was the best option. Someone who didn’t care enough
about him to lie.

“You lost your shit.”

He’d been right.

“Oh.”

“I mean, that’s not what–”

He cut her off, “It’s okay,”

“You had a panic attack, a bad one. After running off the field we all followed you, Mike was the
first one to notice something was off.” She closed her eyes, “we found you in the bathroom
vomiting. I thought you just got sick, then I actually saw you and knew. I know what someone
reaching their breaking point looks like.”
Will swallowed tightly, “you do?”

“I…okay, if I’m vulnerable you can’t judge me when you’re not mentally checked out, alright?”
She said, scooting closer to the bed.

“Alright.”

“My dad was a piece of shit, my mom knew it too. I don’t know, I can’t really blame her, it would
be a lot easier if I could though. He never wanted a daughter, I was aware of that the second I could
have, like, coherent memories. For a while I tried doing ‘boy things’ skateboarding, never put a
dress on.” She looked down, “we had the first bad fight when I was eight, he told me I was a
worthless little shit, that I’d never get a husband. It was ridiculous, I was a kid. I couldn’t be a girl
right, but I couldn’t be a boy right either. It didn’t matter what I did, he just didn’t want me.”

Will stared at the side of her head, latching onto every word. From the moment they met Max had
been stubborn, barely showing an ounce of emotion. For the first time, it felt like he was looking
into a mirror.

“My mom always just sat there. Never said shit and it made me feel like he was right, if there’s no
one there to defend you but yourself then it’s like there’s no one there at all. He liked to yank my
hair, thought it was funny or something. It was this constant reminder that I wasn’t what he
wanted. One night I found some scissors and chopped it all off, broke right up to my ears and it
was hideous, I broke down. I sobbed for weeks and my mom wouldn’t let me take my hat off. I
lived just knowing I was an embarrassment to her and a disappointment to my dad. Eventually it
felt like the only trait I had, the only thing I could identify with was being ugly and in the way. If
my parents couldn’t even want me I was ugly on the inside, and all I did was ruin what I was on the
outside.”

She was speaking quickly, everything coming out in one breath. It felt like she had dug into his
head and pulled out his own spiraling thoughts. Max eventually took in a gulp of air, her cheeks
flushed.

“I’ve never really told any of that. I didn’t even mean to tell you all of that, did you even hear me?”
She rushed out.

Will nodded, “yes.”

Max bit at her lip, “trying to figure out if I’m cool with that.”

“I won’t tell anyone.”

She sent him a tight smile, “right. How are you feeling?”

“I don’t know,” he said.

“You know…well, everyone loves you. I mean, Lucas has been a mess– I’m not saying that to
make you feel guilty, I just mean that everyone cares a lot, your football–”

He flinched, and it wasn’t subtle enough for her to not notice. Max’s eyes widened, and Will
almost jolted when she snapped her fingers.

“ There ,” she said, pointing at him.

“What?”

“There it is, I fucking found it.”

Will felt his eye twitch, “found what?”

“The misplaced chess piece. Seriously Byers, you’re the most shut off person I’ve ever met. I
mean, when I met you it kind of freaked me out. Mike thought you were an angel and the others
liked you too, and I…well, I thought something was off. No one is that perfect. Then I thought you
were just an asshole, now I know that’s not true. It’s like– okay, you know a family tree leads off
into a bunch of different directions? Creating millions of mistakes?”

“You mean people?”

She nodded, “yes exactly. You need a root to all the shit, everyone does.”
Will felt his chest tightening, it was like a detective was finding him guilty for murder. He shifted,
not daring to look at her.

“Sorry. I’m not trying to…I just think all our friends are kind of stupid. I love them and everything,
but sometimes they forget that someone hurting like you doesn’t just pop out of nowhere.” Max
moved until she was in his line of sight, “look, if you talk to me I won’t say a thing, got it? We can
shake on it, an eye for an eye.”

“What did you find out?” He whispered after a minute. The light was growing and he could only
run for so long, his legs were growing exhausted.

“Football, you’re scared of it.”

Will wanted to take his question back, “I think you should go–”

“Hey wait, just wait a second.”

His pulse was rising, and he turned his back to her, “go Max, I don’t want to talk anymore.”

“But–”

“ Go .”

She sighed, and Will listened as she stood up. The room went silent, floorboards creaking as Max
made her way to the door.

“I just want you to know that I’m coming back.”

The door shut, leaving Will in the darkness once again.

—-------
She did come back. Will thought it was a bluff, but the next morning his mom was telling him
about a visitor. Based on the confusion in her voice, it wasn’t hard to figure out who it was.

He didn’t say a word as Max marched in, her face painted with determination.

“Is this going to be a talking day?”

Will stared, but kept his mouth shut.

“Fine.” She sat down on the ground, “I didn’t tell anyone you talked to me yesterday by the way,
and that was really hard for me. You know how fun it is to rub stuff in Mike’s face?”

His heart warmed. Mike. He liked talking about Mike.

“Oh you like that don’t you?” She smirked, “fine, maybe that will be my gateway today. Did you
know Mike didn’t know he had curly hair until I met him? His mom used to gel it down, almost
gave me a heart attack when I first saw the mushroom on his head.”

Max leaned back against the wall, light grazing her face. It made her look like a painting. Her eyes
stayed on him, and Will felt like he was being studied.

“When we first started the band, Eddie wanted us to have some kind of mysterious thing going,
sadly Mike kept ruining that. I mean, he’s a complete nerd with a big mouth. He was in the musical
last year, but didn’t get a good part cause he’s a terrible actor. You’re not gonna believe what he
played.” Max looked at him expectantly, “come on, ask me.”

Will felt his lips twitch, but couldn’t find the words. Eventually, she gave in. The smile seemed to
be enough.

“He was a tree, never even left the stage and had to stand there the whole time. The kicker is that
he’s also not a very good dancer. They had four performances and I went to every single one,
funniest shit I’ve ever seen.” She laughed under her breath, “and I couldn’t even make fun of him
for it because he was so proud of himself. To be fair, he did get a few of the steps right.”
Mike was prideful, it was endearing. Will loved performers for that reason. There was such a spark
in them, one that wasn’t easily drained out.

“I don’t even think he wanted a good part. You’ve heard him, he’s an amazing singer, I think he
just likes being a part of something. Robin would bring him a whole bouquet of flowers every time
and he’d get so excited,” she paused, sending him a grin, “he really likes flowers by the way.”

Will felt his spark of joy diminish. The Mike she was talking about didn’t exist to him anymore,
and it was well deserved. Flowers were beautiful, Will had always been captivated by them, but
Mike would never want them from him. Not anymore.

“What happened?” She said, eyes narrowed, “you thought of something, come on Byers, I know
you can talk.”

He watched the blinds move, diming sunlight trying to push its way in.

“Is it going to rain?” He asked, wincing as his voice came out. No amount of water could fix the
scratchiness there.

She looked confused, “I don’t know, it looks like it.”

The light was slim, and Will brought a finger up to catch it. It was sad.

“Do you…want me to open the blinds?”

Will shook his head, not putting his hand down, “no.”

“It’s not good to be sitting in the dark for as long as you have, come on I’ll just open it a little–”

“No.”

Max sat back down, her brows pressed together, “fine. You’re really stubborn, you know that?”
“I don’t know,” he whispered, watching as the ray of light flickered, “I don’t know anything.”

“About what?”

He met her eye, but didn’t say a word. He wondered if she could understand. Will watched her face
move, contorting to create an answer he couldn’t give.

“You know, you might be annoying, but you’re very passionate.” Will sent her a confused look,
“you try really hard even when things suck, usually you have a pretty good attitude about
everything, you have a dry sense of humor which I wasn’t expecting. The painting you did for
homecoming was fucking amazing and the gold really stood out, was my favorite.”

“The gold?” He whispered, watching her smile.

“Yep, the gold was the best part. You did a great job, Byers.” She pulled her arms close, “Mike
tried to take credit for it but I know he didn’t do shit. Also, I don’t think you deserved to be
humiliated like that in front of the school.”

Will looked to the floor, “I did.”

“You didn’t.”

He turned his back to her, engulfing his face in darkness.

“Is that your way of telling me you’re done?” Will stayed quiet, “fine, but I’m coming back until
you get your shit together, got it Byers?”

Will watched her leave, not sure how he felt about it. Someone was pushing him, and it was the
first time he wasn’t the stronger player that could push them right back.

—-------
Max stayed true to her word. She came after school the next day, and the day after that. Will knew
others filtered in, felt himself being fed and having medicine forced down his throat. None of them
stuck, they came, went, and Will didn’t have time to even think about who they were. Max was
different. The light really seemed to like her. He assumed it had something to do with her hair.

“It’s really bright out today.”

Will already knew that.

“Maybe we can rip this sucker open, how does that sound?”

“Just a little bit.”

Her smile grew. He watched as she slowly pulled it, the sliver growing. Will felt the warmth
against his neck, the multicolored eyes shining with joy. Raising his arm up, he let the growing ray
hold his hand.

“It’s been almost a week.”

He said nothing.

“Which means that today,” she sat on the edge of his bed, “you’re talking.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“I don’t want to.”

“Too bad,” she said firmly, “I told you something. It’s my turn now. An eye for an eye, right?”
Will tilted his head towards the window, now seeing the slight smile there. A gleam of
encouragement. It was okay.

“What do you want?” He whispered.

Max’s lips pulled up, then she turned her head and pointed to the haunting object in the corner. He
already knew what was there.

“That.”

“It’s a ball.” He hugged his blanket close, “and it’s sitting there.”

“Right, and why do you have a deflated football sitting in your room?” He flinched at the name,
eyes closing, “I see. Did you get it as a gift?”

“Yes.”

“From who?” He said nothing. “Come on, you promised.”

“No I didn’t.”

“Will.”

He glanced at her, “my dad.”

“Ah, the piece of shit.” She paused, “tell me how much you hate him.”

“I…I don’t hate him, I–”

“You hate him. He’s a monster.”

Will swallowed, “monster. Someone like me.”

“What do you mean–” She cut herself off, expression falling, “shit.”

“You were right.”

Max sighed, “no, no that is not what I meant. I talk out of my ass sometimes alright? Also, I’m not
going to apologize out of pity right now, okay? Because I am still pissed at you about the whole
mess, you were an asshole and I stand by that. I still shouldn’t have said all of that, you’re not…
you made a mistake, and it happens.”

“I don’t want an apology, I don’t care. If you never saw me like this you wouldn’t apologize–”

“You’re right, I probably wouldn’t have.”

Will tried to turn away from her, “just go.”

“No, no I am not going anywhere because you need to hear this. I didn’t know you, I still don’t
really and that means I didn’t have any right to say that shittery alright?”

“Shittery?”

She smirked, “my favorite word. Okay look, no one had my back growing up. No one cared if I got
walked all over, no one was ever there for me. Then I met Mike and I finally had a friend, all of
them gave me a family. Super cheesy I know, but it’s true. I’m just over protective and I wanted to
keep him safe in the way no one ever did for me, but I never even did that. I found out and said
nothing and still let him get hurt while I also hurt you in the process. That’s not something I’m
proud of, and it’s not about you, it’s about me. I said those things and didn’t care that I was
speaking to another person. I don’t feel pity for you, you still made some fucked up choices, but
that doesn’t mean I get to act like you’re a monster.”

Will felt his eyes well up with tears, “oh.”

“You’re one strong little shit aren’t you?”

He huffed, “I’m not. Look at me.”

“Not everyone lasts as long as you did. I wouldn’t have, I can promise you that, and I bet not one of
our friends would have either. I’m not saying you deserve our pity, but you deserve to be
understood. That’s all I’m trying to do.”

“I don’t believe you.”

She nodded, “then let's make you believe me.”

“I don’t know how to do that.”

Max stood up, “yeah me neither, but we’ve got to start somewhere. Okay, let me just spitball here.”

“Okay.”

“So um, okay your dad sucks right?”

Will bit at the inside of his cheek, “I guess.”

“No, you’ve gotta say it. He’s a piece of shit, say it.”

“Max–”

She crossed her arms, “say it or I’m opening the window.”

“He’s a piece of shit.” Will felt like a brick had been taken off his chest.
“There you go, feels nice right?” She started pacing, “say it again, tell me how awful he is, I’m
aching to hear it, Byers.”

“He’s…he’s a piece of shit.”

“More.”

Will tried to breathe, “he broke all my crayons.”

“What an asshole.”

“He forced me to play football and I hated it, I’ve hated it for seven years.”

“There you go,” she leaned against the wall, a smile on her face, “tell me how much you hate it.”

“He told me I wasn’t…that I couldn’t be good enough unless I would,” Will swallowed, trying to
get the hidden words out, “unless I would throw up after. N-Now I can’t…”

“Jesus christ.”

“Sorry.”

She shook her head, “no, he’s just worse than I thought.”

“He pushed me into a pile of glass he threw at me and left me there to die,” Will rushed out,
desperately wanting it off his chest. He needed someone to hear it, to understand how terrified he
was.

Her face went pale, “he…oh my god.”

“Sometimes I wish I wouldn’t have called anyone,” he pinched his eyes shut, “that I would just just
died there, then I could have finally been done. I can’t do this anymore.”

“I heard,” she whispered, walking back over to him, “you said you hated everyone too.”

“I didn’t– I didn’t mean it like that.”

Max sat down by the bed, her face close to his, “you’re allowed to mean it like that. People have
fucked you over for seventeen years now.”

“No, no that’s not true. My mom tried a-and you guys tried, it’s my fault–”

“We should have tried harder. Your mom shouldn’t have let that man anywhere near you and yet
she did anyway. Not saying she’s a bad person. She made a mistake and it hurt you. The difference
between you two is that when you made a mistake the person you hurt the most was yourself.”

Will felt a tear roll down his cheek, “I don’t hate anyone.”

“Then you’re better than me. I fucking hated every single person that even looked at me growing
up. I thought it was their fault, that the random person at the grocery store should have stepped in
and saved the day. I hated everyone and everything because that was easier than dealing with it.”

“I don’t even know who I am, I don’t know how to hate anyone.” He paused, “but I want to.”

“Know who you are or hate someone?”

“Both.”

She smiled, “well then, that’s a good start.”

—-------
“You’re sitting up today,” Max said as she walked in, dropping her backpack. “And you
showered.”

Will looked at her, “yeah.”

She snorted, “the only person who knows I’ve been coming here is Jane and she promised to keep
her mouth shut about it. Mike is getting suspicious though, he’s usually such an oblivious fuck
too.”

“No he’s not,” Will said, looking at her confused.

“Well, not with you apparently.”

“What?”

“Doesn’t matter.” she sat down on the bed, “I brought you something.”

“What is it?”

Max rolled onto her back, reaching for her bag, “real food.”

She threw it at him. Will peered in, being met with a burger and fries. He sat still for a moment
before pulling it all out.

“I figured the soup you’ve been having would eventually kill you.”

“It’s not too bad.”

Max grinned, “your mom let me have some yesterday, it’s bad.”

Will slowly ate, listening as Max hummed a song. It was peaceful, he wouldn’t tell her, but Will
preferred their time together compared to being alone. She held a brightness that forced his mind to
open.

“Can I open the blinds a little more?”

He paused, looking over at her, “um, okay.”

Max hopped to her feet. More light flooded in, hitting right against his ear. Will felt joy coming
into the dreariness that was his room.

“You know, this place could really use a makeover,” Max walked around, throwing open his
closet, “you have a lot of long sleeves.”

“Yeah.”

“You need posters or something on the walls, maybe we could move your bed too. It’s way too far
away from the window.” She looked at the door, “your door handle needs to be gold.”

“Why?”

“You're a warm color kind of guy, silver doesn’t suit you.”

“Didn’t know you knew so much,” he muttered, putting his trash into the bag.

Max came back to sit down, “so, why did you play football for so long?”

He tensed, “um, it doesn’t matter–”

“No, no deflecting. Come on, force it out.”

Will took a deep breath, “because I didn’t know what else to do. I think I wanted to make him
proud even if he wasn’t there, to prove him wrong about me. That I wasn’t just some stupid kid
that couldn’t throw a ball.”

“When did he leave?”

“Right after I turned fourteen.”

She nodded, “well, three years can feel like nothing.”

“What do you mean?”

“You’ve been stuck. You’ve been forcing yourself to just hate your life and deal with it. I mean,
who would ever guess the football captain hated football?”

He let out a wet laugh, “I guess.”

“How long were you planning on doing this to yourself?”

“Forever, I guess.”

Max bumped their shoulders together, “wow, you had some big plans.”

“Everyone was always too nice to me, I just–”

“Don’t think you deserve it?” He nodded, “yeah, I get it. I pushed Eddie, Robin, and Mike away
for a year before giving in. I thought they’d be better without me. I mean, it can’t be that hard to
find a bass player. I was sure that if I was mean enough or just ignored them enough they’d give
up, everyone else did so I didn’t think they’d be different. Luckily for me, they saw something I
didn’t want to because I was too addicted to being miserable. They saw an actual person under all
my shittery.”

Will grinned, “stop saying shittery.”

“You think it’s funny,” she chuckled, “I can see it on your face.”

“It sounds ridiculous.”

“Maybe, but it’s fun.” Max crossed her legs, “what I’m trying to say is being miserable is a lot
easier than being happy, but it’s going to kill you.”

“I think I lost my chance at people caring about me.”

“You can’t be serious,” she exclaimed, “what do you think I’m doing here? I mean, everyone loves
you. Lucas made you cookies, Dustin has been trying to fix your car with Steve. That’s hilarious
by the way, I’ll have to show you the video. Eddie didn’t believe you were an asshole in the first
place, Robin is knitting you a sweater, Chrissy is putting together a whole binder of your
homework, I think she even did some of it, and Mike he– what I’m trying to say is your perspective
isn’t always the right one.”

“Everyone just feels guilty because they saw me fucking break down, no one actually cares. I
didn’t matter until I looked weak. They pity me, you guys saw me in the hospital and breaking
down in the school bathroom, no one gave a shit until all of that happened. When I’m just me I’m
nothing.”

“Right, and who are you, William Byers?” She asked, an eyebrow raised.

“I don’t…”

“Are you the jackass that doesn’t feel any emotion and walks all over people without caring? The
guy that broke Mike’s heart and didn’t bother to explain himself? Or are you the guy that we just
saw in the bathroom? The one that needs help and that asked for it for the first time?”

Will looked at his hands, “I hurt people.”

“Maybe, but you hurt yourself way more than you could ever hurt them. You’re not a bad
person…you’re not a monster, Will.”
“Stop saying that–”

“No, you’re not a monster.” She grabbed onto his shaking hand, “you’re not .”

“You don’t know me.”

“Well you believed me when I said you were a piece of shit, you believed me when I ripped into
you and demolished your character, so what’s the difference now?”

Will tore at the skin on his lip, wanting to find an answer. The light came to his hand on its own,
tracing lines on it. He wanted to hold onto it, but knew it was something that couldn’t stay with him
forever. A ghost of hope.

“I don’t know.”

“Because there isn’t one. You know I don’t pity you. You believed me the first time because you
like hating yourself, it’s an addiction. The football, the throwing up, forcing people away, it’s
addicting to you.”

“When did you become a therapist?” He muttered.

“Because I get you, Byers. The others may struggle sometimes, but I get it. Your dad’s not here
anymore and he’s not going to fucking touch you again if any of us have anything to say about it.
Now the only person you’ve gotta fight is yourself.” She patted his back awkwardly, “that’s
probably going to be the hardest battle.”

“Because when you only have yourself to defend you, it’s basically no one at all,” Will grumbled,
clearly remembering the words she said a few days prior.

“Wow, I feel like I’m a school teacher.”

Will laughed, wiping his eyes, “yeah.”

“I have big plans for us tomorrow.” Max grabbed her backpack, “so you should get some sleep.”

“Max, you don’t have to keep coming–”

“I know.”

With that, she turned and walked out of the room. Will kept his eyes forward, watching the blinds
blow up, the vent under them pushing around warm air. He could tell it was snowing, the bright
light reflecting against the white.

He wanted to see more of it.

—------

“It should not be snowing this much right now, yesterday was December first.” Max stomped into
his room, throwing off her jacket. “Your mom is putting up lights, she’s very excited.”

Will sent her a timid smile, “she loves the snow.”

“Do you have scissors in here?” He sent her a look, “right. Okay, I’ll be right back.”

“What are you–”

She walked out, coming back moments later with kitchen scissors in hand.

“Come over here,” Max sat down in the corner, not far from the partially deflated football.

Will starred with fear, “um, no I think–”

“It’ll be okay, just come on.”

He slowly pulled himself off the bed, shuffling to where she was sitting. Will stiffly found a place
next to her.

Max handed him the scissors, “let’s hope these are sharp.”

“What–”

He cut himself off as she picked up the football, placing it in front of him. Will froze, the tiny
object more terrifying than he could admit.

“Stab it.”

“I can’t,” he whispered.

“You can. Come on, demolish it.”

The football looked almost new, each line easy to trace out. Will remembered the day he got it, his
father had forced it into his hand, telling him it was something special. He’d spent the whole night
trying to hide it, not wanting to have to look at it. Will thought of everytime his dad came into his
room, invading the only space he had and throwing the ball from hand to hand, reminding Will that
he could never truly run away.

He set his lips into a tight line, and without another thought, he gripped the scissors tighter and
pushed them straight down. He watched as they sunk their teeth into the football, causing all of the
air to sink out. Will’s hand was trembling, the scissors still dug deep.

“Nice!” Max clapped, “alright, let's cut it up.”

“What?”
“Come on, these suckers are sharp, let's cut it.”

Will made a cut, his arm beginning to ache. The burn gave him a rush, and he carved the first piece
out, watching it fall to the floor. After that, his hand went numb, but he continued until the football
was almost unrecognizable. Once the last piece was thrown onto the floor, he tossed the scissors
down, breathing heavily.

“You did it.”

“I did it,” he said.

“Now you never have to touch a football again.” Max leaned back next to him, their shoulders
touching. “This room really does need a makeover though, you’re gonna have to give me a list of
things you like.”

Will felt his smile fall, “oh um, I don’t really know.”

“That’s fine, it doesn’t need to be a lot–”

“No, I don’t– I’ve never really thought about what I like or want. It felt like a waste of time,” he
paused, “or like I couldn’t do it, that I’d find out there wasn’t really anything to me.”

Max looked at him, “what about Mike?”

His stomach hurtled, “what?”

“Well, I don’t believe you didn’t like him–”

“That’s not the same thing–”

“Isn’t it?”
Will wanted to cross his arms, but Max was sitting so close it was impossible to move. He felt her
eyes boring holes into his head.

“Liking Mike got me into this mess in the first place.”

“Good.”

He shot his eyes to her, “good?”

“This needed to happen. Maybe it could have happened in a better way, but it needed to happen–”

He scoffed, “right, because Mike Wheeler really fucking helped out, now I get to constantly
remember being called pathetic and worthless a-and like I was some kind of– he told me he hated
me, multiple times, I’m sure you remember that. He humiliates me in front of everyone, and I’m
supposed to be okay with it. Then he sees me at school after I almost bleed to death and just
fucking pushes past me and all I can think about is that it was all my fault, that I ruined him and
I’m terrified that I broke this person that came into my life; And it didn’t matter because then he
hugs me and doesn’t tell me why and then walks off again. Now I just–”

Will cut himself off, finally looking at Max’s face. She was wearing a wide smile.

“Why are you smiling?” He asked.

“You’re angry.”

He cleared his throat, “I’m…I’m not, I just–”

“No, it's good. This is good, you have a reason to be pissed at him.” She paused, “be angry.”

“Be angry?”

Max turned onto her knees, “fuck yeah, be angry, be irriated, be sad, cry all you fucking want.
Be…be so insanely angry if you want to. Just let yourself feel. If you can be mad then you have the
capacity to be happy, you can’t have one without the other. Just feel everything, Byers.”

He grinned at her excitement, “I don’t like being angry.”

“No, you don’t like bottling it up. No one does.”

Will bit at his cheek, “I feel kind of empty.”

She shrugged, “you’re just making space for the good stuff.”

“What’s the good stuff?”

Max didn’t say anything, letting the room drift into silence. Will stared at the broken football
pieces, feeling excited to throw them away. Feeling relieved that the bomb had been shattered.
Feeling too much at one time.

“The good stuff is whatever you want. Usually people pick something like love or happiness, but I
guess those two can be the same thing.” Max’s eyes gleamed in the light, “I think there’s a lot more
to you then you’re letting yourself see.”

“That’s scary.”

“Yeah, but it's a good scary. Things can get better if you let them, I know that’s rich coming from
me, but it’s a lot easier to give advice than take it.”

“Guess so.”

For the next ten minutes they sat together, and Will played back everything she had said to him as
well as what he’d revealed. Eventually, Max got up and left, testing him with loneliness once
again.

Will looked down, seeing light swimming against his fingers. There was something new there,
instead of a flicker that was threatening to give out, the light was growing, morphing into his skin.
He stood up and turned to the window. With a racing heart he gripped onto the curtains and threw
them open. Bright light flooded inside, the once small bulb growing into itself. Will saw those
detached eyes one last time before they came back to him, taking the spot they’d lost years ago.
The dim vision Will used to have was flooded with color.

The light finally reached his face.

 Chapter 37
Chapter Notes

Complex- Katie Gregson-MacLeod

Mike stood outside the door, forcing down his tipping anxiety. It wasn’t as if he hadn’t been there
since the incident, but the house still hadn’t lost its haunting aura.

“Honey, how are you?” Joyce pulled him into a hug the moment the door opened.

He reciprocated, sinking into her arms, “hi. I’m okay. How is he?”

She sent him a strained smile, “the same as yesterday.”

Mike nodded, “has he spoken to anyone?”

“Not yet, no.” She ran a hand through his hair, “do you want to see him?”

“If that’s okay.”

Joyce pulled him into the house, shutting the door behind them, “of course it’s okay, I’m sure he’d
love to see you.”

Mike wished that could be true, but the dullness in Will’s eyes proved otherwise. He made his way
through the hall, stalling as he stood by the broken boy’s door. Swallowing tightly, he turned the
knob. It felt wrong under his hand.

The room was dark, barely any light shining through the curtains. Will’s body was in a heap under
the covers. He hadn’t moved since Mike last saw him.
Without a word, he circled around the bed until he was in eyesight. Will was staring forward, face
pale and in desperate need of sun.

“Hi,” he whispered, sitting on the ground. There wasn’t a response, not that he was expecting one.
Mike pulled his knees closer, “it’s cold outside, so you definitely need to get another coat soon.”

Will didn’t look at him, his face unmoving. Mike felt like he was hallucinating even being there.
He wanted to get on his knees and beg to be given something. He hadn’t seen Will smile in ages
and the need was growing with each moment.

“I’m– I miss you, and I know that things aren’t great but I,” he glanced at the closed window, “I’m
still here if you need me. I should have been paying more attention, I knew something was wrong
a-and I’m sorry I didn’t do anything, I just– I know how you get when people push you.”

Mike waited for a word that wasn’t going to come. Gently, he picked Will’s left hand up, rubbing
it between his own when he realized how cold it was.

“Gonna have to get you some mittens,” he said, “some yellow ones maybe, I think you’d like that.
You wouldn’t tell anyone though you stubborn bastard.”

He brought Will’s hand up to his lips, pressing a fluttering kiss to the boy’s finger tips. Will’s skin
was never cold, it was unlike him. Mike knew that shouldn’t be the top of his worries, but
something about it itched at him.

“Do you need another blanket?” He whispered, pulling the one over Will’s body up higher,
“maybe that’ll do it.”

Mike brushed some of Will’s hair back, it wasn’t necessary but he ached to feel close. He knew he
could be somewhat of a leech, but with Will it was impossible not to be. Brushing his thumb under
the boy’s eye, Mike felt his chest tighten.

“I really want to talk to you,” he whispered, voice cracking, “and I just…everyone is driving me
insane, you’re also driving me insane but in a different way. Kind of like ‘oh you’re so annoying’
but like, affectionately, and then I’d just give you a hug and make sure you’re okay. I want you to
be okay.”
Mike rested his head on the bed, looking up at Will with pleading eyes. He kept a hand caressing
the boy’s cheek, trying to feel as close as possible to a person thousands of miles away.

“Chrissy won’t let me do any of your homework, but I did try just so you know. It’s dumb, but I
like doing it. It’s kind of that moment where my brain actually shuts up. So, if you ever do want me
to do stuff for you I'd do it.” He paused, “I’d do it for you even if I hated it too. Just thought you
should know that.”

He got nothing, Will didn’t seem like he heard a word. Mike pressed his lips together, feeling that
pain welling up. He was desperate for answers that weren’t coming.

“Can you please say something?” He pleaded, shakingly gripping tighter onto Will’s hand, “please,
please just tell me you can hear me. I can’t do this again I-I can’t keep losing you, please…”

Mike received silence, Will’s eyes not giving him an ounce of attention. It was a helpless feeling,
and became suffocating the more he sat there. Mike felt tears well up and leaned forward, pressing
a kiss to Will’s head, hoping that the boy could at least feel his goodbye.

Mike left the room, breaths feeling heavy as he tried to keep himself from falling apart.

“Honey, is everything okay?” Joyce asked as he rushed out.

“Everything is fine, sorry I just–” he scrambled for his keys, “my mom called, I need to get home.”

“Mike–”

“I’m sorry, thank you Miss Byers.”

The door clicked shut behind him, and Mike’s throat burned. He covered his mouth quickly,
hoping Joyce hadn’t heard his sobs.

Deja vu hit him as he curled into his car. Mike leaned forward, resting his forehead against the
wheel. In recent months, he had cried more than one might in their lifetime. He sat there, shaking
in the cold as the helpless tears poured out. Seeing Will like that had grown to be too much, and
trying to sit there and act like he was okay now felt impossible.

Mike drove home, eyes slightly blurred as he sobbed. It wasn’t the safest idea, but he needed to get
away from that house. Maybe if he was gone, he’d be able to forget that Will now seemed like he
had truly died. Guilt hit him, he should have done something sooner, someone who snaps in such a
tremulous way needed help long before asking for it.

Help.

As he pulled into the driveway, Mike thought about that word. Will had asked him for help twice,
and both of those times Mike had failed him. He was useless and unable to save Will more than
once.

The house was dim, his parents out for the day. For the first time, that was relieving. Mike pressed
his back against the door, trying to take a full breath. Will’s dead eyes washed over his vision and
Mike couldn’t shake them away. No matter how silent the room was, Mike covered his ears,
wanting to block out everything.

He clenched his eyes shut, searching for relief. The dishwasher was going, and recently they had a
new one installed. It was meant to be almost silent, but Mike could hear each drip of water, the
steam spilling into his mouth.

Mike wanted silence. Real silence. Not the one filled with unshared secrets and looming death. He
was in search of peace, and it felt years away. He wondered what Will was thinking, or if he was
thinking anything.

The words Will had said were still in his mind. Mike had never seen someone snap like that, and
the last person he ever wanted to see in pain was Will. Unfortunately, the boy seemed to grab onto
every horror imaginable. Maybe Mike would have believed it was bad karma if it was anyone else;
But not Will, never him.

Mike sat back against the door, holding himself close and waiting for silence to come.

—-------
“Heather said it’s a fall party..”

Mike looked out at the snow, “it’s a little late for that.”

“That’s what I thought, but I didn’t want to get us uninvited by saying anything,” Robin said.

“Do you think she’ll have the chocolate covered pretzels?” Eddie asked from the back seat.

“If they’re not the sticks I don’t want them.” Max was driving, being the most competent out of the
four of them.

“It’s almost Christmas Max, be realistic she probably got the tree shaped ones,” Mike grumbled
out, pressing his head against the window.

“Bullshit, those ones are shit.”

Robin rolled her eyes, “they all taste the same–”

Mike cut her off, “that’s not true, different shapes mean different tastes.”

“You just want to fight with me.”

“I’ll fight with you since you’re wrong.”

Max pulled into a spot, and Mike grimaced at how far it was. It had started snowing that week, and
he had tried to use it as an excuse not to come. Mike had locked himself inside for the last few
days, and eventually Eddie had yanked him back into the real world.

“Do you think her parents just keep these lights up all year?”

“What do you mean?”

Eddie shrugged, “I mean they’re not extremely visible, maybe they just turn them off until
December hits.”

“That’s stupid.” Mike said.

Max glanced at him, “you’re so pleasant, you know that?”

He sent her a glare, but didn’t answer. Being forced out of the comfort of his basement to come to a
party hadn’t set him in a good mood.

The house wasn’t too crowded, and it was lit warmly. Mike scrunched his face up as the smell of
pumpkin candles hit his nose. It was overwhelming and he was almost positive the scent was being
pumped into the vents.

“Wow, they really go all out.”

Mike nodded in agreement, but didn’t say anything. He was handed a drink, but didn’t touch his
lips to it, the smell of alcohol was much too heavy.

“The snow looks pretty,” Robin said, leaning against the wall next to him.

“Mhm.”

“You okay?”

Mike glanced at her, “I’m fine.”

He looked around the room, wondering how crowded it needed to get before he could sneak off.
Faces blurred together, meaningless conversation spilling from their lips. Maybe if Mike stopped
right there and kept to himself, he never would have known. Thinking about it, that’s probably
what everyone wanted.
What they didn’t know was that Mike could pick out his whisper in a room of screaming people.

Mike froze, the world slowing to a stop. It felt like some warped dream that no one else knew
about. Will wasn’t supposed to be there. He was laying in bed unresponsive, not at a party.

When Will turned his head, their eyes finding each other, Mike’s heart finally stopped.

They were so green.

His lips parted, and the dim lights began to blind him. Mike tried to swallow, but it got stuck and
he was unable to fix his dry throat. Will looked terrifyingly normal. The warm pink was back on
his cheeks, a look of recognition placed where it had been lost.

“Mike?” Robin touched his arm.

Slowly, he looked down at her, “w-what is he…”

“What do you mean? I thought…Max didn’t tell you?”

He looked at the redhead, her face pinched, “what…”

“Mike, I thought he talked to you–”

That was all he needed to hear. Something inside of him cracked, hurt seeping in. Mike pressed his
drink into Max’s hand and turned around.

“Mike–”

“Shut up, j-just get away from me,” he said, trying to breathe.

He made his way through the crowd, needing to get out. Mike threw the front door open, holding
his arms close as he walked down the sidewalk, snow dripping from the sky. The sun hadn’t
completely fallen yet, but the light was fading.

“Wait!”

Mike wanted to get his feet moving, show some sort of defiance, but he froze. Will’s voice filtered
into his ears and he was under a spell in seconds. His chest was heaving, vines of scattered
emotions making it impossible to calm down. Slowly, he turned around, not sure if he was ready
for what was waiting.

Will stood there, slightly out of breath. It was like a picture, one Mike couldn’t fully believe. It felt
like only a few hours ago he was begging Will’s lifeless eyes to look at him, staring at a person
who seemed long gone.

Now he was there, seeming unharmed other than winded from his short run. Mike’s gaze moved
hurriedly, trying to find some crack and prove to himself that Will wasn’t really there. To try and
hide away from the fact that he’d been agonizing over a boy that couldn’t give him the thought of
day.

“Shit, look I’m uh…hi.”

Mike pressed his lips together, nodding slowly, “okay.”

He turned around, but didn’t get very far before Will spoke up again.

“That wasn’t– I’m sorry, I’m sorry I don’t really know what to say.”

“Okay.”

“Can you stop doing that?”

Mike crossed his arms, “I’m not doing anything, we don’t have anything to say to each other
apparently, so it’s fine–”
“That’s not what I meant–”

“Why didn’t you call me? You didn’t– did everyone know you…I don’t know, became fucking
competent again other than me?” Will looked away, giving him his answer. Mike wiped at his
eyes, not wanting to give Will the satisfaction of his tears. “Oh.”

“I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.”

“Okay. I’m going to go.”

Will took a step closer, “don’t be like that, I’m talking to you now–”

“Only because I fucking saw you, Will. You didn’t want to talk to me.”

“Would you just give me a break? I didn’t think about you, I just forgot–” Will stopped himself,
but it was too late.

Mike felt a hand tighten on his heart. He watched Will’s face fall before covering his eyes. A sob
slipped out.

“That was mean, I’m sorry.” Will’s voice came closer until Mike felt arms wrapping around his
shoulders, “fuck that was really mean, I’m so sorry. I’m sorry.”

It was warm. Will was filled with a heat Mike immediately dropped into. He pressed his face into
the boy’s shoulder, snaking his arms around Will’s waist and tugging him close. Mike cried, head
pounding as the tears created a never-ending fountain.

“Y-You didn’t think about me?” He choked out, throat ripped apart as he tried to speak.

Will cupped the back of his head, “of course I did, I was being stupid. Please don’t cry…”

“You’re not stupid.”

The arms around him tightened, “God, you angel.”

Will spoke under his breath, but Mike heard it well enough. He shoved his face farther into the
boy’s sweatshirt, wanting to steal his warmth.

“I’m s-sorry–”

“No, no no don’t apologize I didn’t mean…” Will pulled back, “you look cold.”

“It’s cold out,” Mike sniffed, leaning into Will’s touch.

Will’s lips turned up, “yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“Do you want to go back inside?”

“No.”

Will nodded, “do you want to leave?”

“With you?” He whispered, hoping Will had heard him.

“With me.” Mike looked off to the side, doubt oozing off of him, “I would like you to come with
me, will you?”

His heart fluttered, “yes.”

“Okay.”
Mike nodded, feeling like a fool, “okay.”

“I’ll take you home, come on.” Will slowly pulled out of the embrace.

They walked in silence for a minute, but Mike felt like he was seconds from exploding. Will was
right there, alive and talking. He had to fight his hand down so he didn’t start poking at the boy.

“If you want to say something you can just do it.”

Mike flushed, “I don’t…how are you here?”

“I didn’t die.”

He looked to the ground, “felt like it.”

“Max said you came to see me.”

“Max?” He asked, having his suspicions confirmed.

“Yeah she…helped.”

Mike smiled slightly, “what did she do, come in and smack it out of you?”

“Something like that,” Will said with a tiny laugh. It was barely audible, but it was there.

They got to Will’s car, and Mike stood outside the door, not trusting it.

“It’s fine, Steve said he and Dustin fixed it.”

“And you trusted them?”

“Not really, but it hasn’t stopped yet.”

Mike reluctantly got in, listening as the weak engine came to life. There was a tension zipping up
between them, one that hadn’t left them alone for weeks. He remembered how they used to be, and
found something empty within himself. There was a time where he was oblivious, where he
thought they were equals.

Now he knew Will would never care about him at the same level. Mike wasn’t angry anymore, he
couldn’t find it in himself to be, but he loved someone who didn’t have the capacity to feel the
same.

“What are you thinking about?”

Mike looked out the window, “nothing.”

“I am sorry for not telling you.”

“It’s fine.” Will let out a breathy laugh, causing Mike to look over at him, “what?”

“Nothing it’s just, you sound like…”

“You?”

Will glanced over at him, “I guess, yeah.”

“Unfortunate.”

The car ride was silent after that, and if Mike was any less exhausted he might have felt guilty. He
was happy Will was okay, but now he had to see the truth. He would never be that important to
Will, he was some after thought. That should have been obvious from the beginning, and Mike
couldn’t blame Will either, he probably had so much going on in his head. Sadly, that knowledge
didn’t make it hurt any less.

“So, where do you want to talk?” Mike asked, opening the front door.

“I don’t care, it’s your house,” Will said, folding his hands together.

Mike nodded and motioned towards the basement. They kept it the warmest down there, and it was
second nature to find a spot Will would be comfortable in.

They sat down on the couch, awkward silence not having left them. Mike cleared his throat,
twisting the ring on his pointer finger.

“I um…thank you by the way.”

Mike looked at the other boy, “for what?”

“For helping me.”

His breath caught, “I– you don’t have to thank me, I didn’t do anything–”

“You saved my life.”

Mike pressed his eyes shut, “I didn’t get there fast enough, I could have done more o-or taken it
more seriously when you called me. I should have– you don’t have to thank me–”

“Do you actually think…” Will trailed off, scooting closer, “it doesn’t matter how fast you got
there or what you think you should have done. You still saved my life, that’s all that matters to
me.”

“I left you.”
“I deserved it.” Will paused, “I know that homecoming I…I’m really sorry for all of that, I never
meant to hurt you–”

“Then what did you mean to do?”

Will met his eye, “I needed you. It didn’t matter that it wouldn’t last, because it was better than
nothing.”

Mike’s stomach rolled, his hands sweating. He hadn’t been expecting an answer, not one that truly
meant anything. Will’s eyes were gleaming, like he was absorbing every ounce of light in the dim
room.

“That was selfish, and I’m sorry.”

“I…” Mike cleared his throat, “but it didn’t have to end, it didn’t…you could have talked to me. If
you would have just been honest things could have turned out differently–”

“I couldn’t do that to Jane.”

“What about me?” He asked, feeling like he’d been there before. The time loop was never-ending,
“you keep talking about everyone else but me. I wanted you too, I didn’t want to date Jane and I
wouldn’t have even if you never existed. So why do you talk about this like I don’t matter?”

“You do matter–”

“Then fucking act like it,” he snapped, “I begged you to explain that night and you just fucking
stood there.”

Will didn’t meet his fiery gaze, “I…look, I don’t like being yelled at. I don’t know how to take it. I
messed up.”

He felt his shoulders losen, “okay. Why?”

“I don’t really know how to talk about it yet.”

Mike nodded, “do you think you’d be able to tell me someday?”

Their eyes met, “yes.”

“Do you regret it?” He asked.

“Which part?”

Mike wanted to reach out and touch Will, to pull him close, “being with me?”

“I’ve tried.” Will crossed his arms, but the hold was loose, “I can’t, I’m sorry. I don’t think I could
ever regret it…I’ve never really met anyone like you.”

“What, annoying?”

“Special.”

Mike’s cheeks flushed, “oh.”

“I do care about how you feel…I never wanted to make you feel like I don’t. You’re important to
me.”

He bit the inside of his cheek, pulling on the skin there. Mike closed his eyes for a moment,
remembering when he had felt Will’s hands on his face, tracing each line on him. Mike had felt
like a piece of art that night. They had been in the exact same spots. It was innocent back then,
Mike falling in love with someone he had hoped might fall just as hard.

Now he knew better.

“I’m sorry.”
“What?” Will asked.

“I’m sorry I just– I don’t believe you.”

“You don’t think I care about you?”

Mike swallowed down the lump in his throat, “I never said that, I said I don’t think I’m important
to you.”

“You are,” Will said, a pinch of desperation in his voice.

“Really?” He breathed out, “Will, you couldn’t even call to tell me you were okay. It’s fine,
alright? You don’t have to sit here and say all of these things, I get it, you’re going through a lot.”

“No, that’s not fair. I know I messed up, but I never would have gotten with you in the first place if
I didn’t want to. You have always been important to me.”

“You really wanted to be with me?”

Will nodded and looked at him nervously, “ and I still need you.”

That caused his brain to halt itself. Mike sucked in a sharp breath, meeting Will’s eyes. He almost
sunk into them, allowing the boy to steal him one last time. There wasn’t a way Mike could
convince himself that he wasn’t embarrassingly in love with Will. A person who had hurt him
more times than he could count, but also made him immensely happy.

Then he straightened up, realizing how this would always go. He couldn’t spend his time begging
someone to love him, not after so many years of already trying that.

“I don’t…” he paused, “I see you as a friend now.”

“Oh.” Will said, and his voice almost made Mike back track, “oh that’s…okay.”
“I miss being your friend.” He turned, looking at Will, trying to keep his voice level.

Will visibly swallowed and nodded, “friends then.”

His gaze lingered on the boy’s face, taking in every detail. Mike knew his breathing was much too
heavy for the situation. He could see the burning fire beneath them, thousands of words begging to
come out, and Mike feared the day they escaped; but for now there was only silence. Will’s jaw
was clenched as their eyes stayed locked, a ripped up string making itself visible once again.

“Friends.”
 Chapter 38
Chapter Notes

The Enemy- Andrew Belle

“What about this one?”

“No.”

“Now you’re just being difficult.”

Will shrugged, “I don’t like it.”

“Okay, when I said you need to have more opinions, I didn’t say they all should be negative,” Max
said as she put the lamp back down.

“I think this is fun.” Lucas leaned against the cart, a bright smile on his face, “we could look at
standing lamps?”

“That could be–”

“I don’t like tall lamps.”

Max rolled her eyes, “why are you in such a bad mood?”

“I’m not in a bad mood.”

“You look like you’re in a bad mood.” Max crossed her arms, and Will looked to Lucas for support
only to find the other boy nodding in agreement.
“I’m just…” he glanced around the store, “this stuff is too much.”

“Okay, what do you want to look at then?”

The entire place felt suffocating. At first it had sounded like a good idea, but Will didn’t know
what he wanted and everything they looked at felt wrong. Max and Lucas had announced they
were taking him shopping for his ‘room makeover’ and Will now felt he hadn’t had enough time to
mentally prepare.

“Will, if you don’t want to do this you can tell us,” Lucas said, sending him a warm smile.

His shoulders slumped, “I really don’t want to do this.”

Max smiled, “now was that so hard?”

“Yes.”

“Well you did it anyway, so gold star for you,” she said, patting him on the arm.

His lips twitched up, “thanks.”

“Has your mom put up that snowman yet?” Lucas asked as they walked out of the store.

Will grimaced, “yes, she’s doing it today.”

“Oh, is that the thing Jane was talking about?”

“Probably. She’s been trying to pop that thing since my mom bought it.”

Lucas snorted, “I like that snowman.”

“How does that thing not get knocked down?” Max got into the passenger's seat while Will
shimmied his way into the back. He held his arms close, praying the heat would kick in quickly.

“She set up the perfect system,” he muttered.

“Well she’s inspired Eddie,” Max said.

Lucas glanced over at her, “what does that mean?”

“He keeps talking about how much it ‘gets him in the spirit’ and is now searching everywhere for a
replica. I’m just hoping he doesn’t find one.”

Will pressed his head against the window, “why?”

“Because I know he’ll put it in the garage where we practice and never take it down.” She turned
to look at him, “it’s my personal hell.”

“A big snowman is your personal hell?” Lucas asked.

“It’s mine too.”

Max held her hand back and gave him a high five, “see that Sinclair? Don’t mock my fears.”

“Fine, I will respect your fears of big inanimate objects. Am I dropping you off at Robin's?”

She nodded, “yeah. Our gig is at nine, you two coming?”

“I don’t know–”
“You’re coming, Byers.” Max sent him an unheated glare.

Lucas added in, “yeah, we’d all miss you.”

There was a part in Will’s mind that was fighting him, trying to dig its claws right back into his
thoughts. Lucas didn’t lie to him, he knew that, but it was difficult to shake the feeling that they
were mocking him. That loneliness he had felt for years screamed, trying to dig itself out.

Will closed his eyes, reminding himself that he was making it all up.

“Thanks,” he said, trying to let the compliment soak in.

They pulled into Robin’s driveway, and Will watched as Lucas leaned over to peck Max’s cheek.
The redhead flushed and waved him off, but he could see her smile growing.

“See you tonight,” Lucas said.

“You too, bye guys!” She got out of the car, leaving the door open as Will moved into the front
seat.

“How’ve you two been?” Will asked as they drove off.

Lucas’ eyes lit up, “we’ve been really good, she’s kind of hard to read sometimes, but we’re
working on it.”

“Good. That’s good, I’m happy for you.”

“Yeah, I mean for awhile I thought I was just being stupid and she didn’t really feel the same, but I
think that was just me being insecure.”

Will looked at him, “what do you mean?”

“I don’t know, I felt like I liked her way more than she liked me.”

“That’s not true.”

Lucas nodded, “I know that now, but it was hard to shake for a while.”

“She’s lucky.” He paused, “you both are.”

“Now I’ve just gotta figure out what to get her for Christmas.”

Will snorted, “yeah good luck with that.”

They got to his house, and Will internally groaned when he saw his mom standing outside.

“Hey guys!” She yelled happily, waving towards them.

“That thing is almost bigger than your house,” Lucas muttered as they stepped out of the car.

“Mom, are you sure it’s not going to blow away?” He asked, letting her pull him into a hug.

“Oh it’s fine,” she walked over to Lucas, kissing his cheek, “how are you, honey?”

“I’m good Miss Byers, you need help with anything?” Lucas put on a charming smile.

“You’re too sweet, but I just finished up. Come on you two, let’s get out of the cold.”

They walked inside, and Will felt the tension in his body leave as warmth hit him. He pulled off his
coat, looking around at the assortment of lights hung up.
“Mom, where do you want the little christmas tree?” Jane called from the hallway.

“Just put it in the bathroom!”

Will nudged Lucas’ arm, “let’s go to my room.”

“Mom, I can’t hear you!”

He shook his head, “Bathroom, Jane!”

“Okay!”

“I swear, all three of you are partially deaf,” Lucas said as they walked into his room. Will glanced
at his window, making his way over and tugging at the blinds. Bright light was shining inside,
making the lamps useless.

“It’s a family trait,” he said, sitting by the vent.

“Mike was right.”

Will felt his stomach dip, “what?”

“Oh sorry, he just…he mentioned how you like to sit by the vent when it’s cold. I guess I never
really noticed before.”

He dropped his eyes down, heart tripping over itself. Will had been trying not to think about Mike,
but the task seemed impossible. Balling his hand into a fist, he pressed it against the ground. For
the first time, the vent was too hot.

“Oh,” he whispered, words lost.

Lucas cleared his throat, “sorry.”

“No it’s not…it’s fine.”

He didn’t look up as Lucas sat next to him, “did you guys talk last weekend?”

“We never actually talk,” he muttered.

“What?”

“Nothing, it doesn’t matter.”

Lucas nodded, “how’s your hand?”

He looked down at it, the long scar burning red, “I try not to think about it.”

“That bad?”

Will shrugged, “sometimes I think it’s fine and then I try to draw or write and it just…it doesn't
work right.”

“It’ll get better–”

“I don’t want to wait for that, it feels like I’m–” he stopped himself, “sorry.”

“No, no keep going.”

Will looked at his friend, “it feels like I’m going insane, and I’m just so mad that it even happened
in the first place. I was just trying to make everything easier and then I opened my mouth and now
my hand doesn’t work right and my dad got away with it anyway. It was all for nothing, I stood up
for myself and I got hurt for it. I got hurt, and then I hurt someone else in the process and I just…I
feel guilty all the fucking time.”

“Will, you didn’t hurt anyone–”

“I did,” he said firmly, “I did and now he won’t even look at me.”

Lucas let out a long breath, “Mike.”

“I’m being stupid.”

“No you’re not. Will, you’ve been through shit most people can’t even imagine. We have known
eachother forever and I’ll say you’re many things, but stupid will never be one of them. You stood
up for yourself, just because you didn’t ‘win the battle’ or slay the dragon or whatever doesn’t
mean you lost.”

“What do you mean?” He asked.

Lucas sent him a smile, “life’s not a fairytale, happy endings won’t always look the same.”

“Have you been planning that line for awhile?”

The other boy laughed, “shut up, I promise I just thought of it.”

“That’s such bullshit. Do you and Max take some poetry class together?”

Lucas’ eyes lit up, “do you think she’d like that?”

“Oh my god.”

“Right, sorry, we’ll table that for now.”

Will smiled, “so we’re going to come back to this poetry class thing then?”

“Okay, now you’re trying to distract me.”

He held his hands up in defeat, “sorry, go on.”

“What I was trying to say is that you didn’t lose and should be proud of yourself.”

“That’s hard.”

“Well, if it helps, I’m really proud of you.”

Will bit his lip, not bothering to blink back the wave of tears. Slowly, he leaned against Lucas’
side, letting the boy pull him into a side hug.

“It does help a little.”

They sat there, and Will allowed his body to relax. That gate around his heart was being chiseled
at, the first few bars snapping and finally letting blood pump freely.

“Can I tell you something?”

Lucas squeezed his arm, “of course.”

“That day…with my dad I um. I think he wanted to kill me.” Will felt Lucas tense, but he didn’t say
anything, “it looked worse than it was, I know that. H-He threw these bottles at me, some of them
hit my arm but the cuts weren’t very deep. He was too drunk to aim right, but I really think he
wanted to kill me. Then he saw me bleeding and just…he ran off.”

“We’re going to get his ass in jail, Will, they’re going to find him.”
He pressed his eyes shut, “he took everything from me.”

“He didn’t. I know it might feel like he did, but he didn’t , Will.” Lucas’ words were cutting,
forcing him to listen, “you’re still here, and you’ve beat him over and over again. He didn’t break
you, no matter what happened that day he still lost. The fucking bastard lost in the end because
you’re here. Lose the battle, but win the war.”

“Thank you.”

Lucas ruffled his hair, “I think that’s the first time you didn’t fight me on something like that.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, your biggest milestone yet.”

Will wiped his eyes and sat up, knocking their shoulders together, “shut up.”

“So…”

“What?”

Lucas raised a brow, “Mike.”

“Oh. Right.”

“Want to tell me about him?”

“You know him already.”

“Really? I’ve never heard of a Mike Wheeler in my life, this is complete news to me–”
Will cut him off, “okay I get it.”

“So?”

“Well he’s got brown eyes.”

“Amazing insight,” Lucas said.

“Give me a break, this is weird.”

“Don’t tell me things like that, tell me about him, real things.”

Will threaded his fingers together, “um, he really likes plays. He told me his favorite one is Timon
of Athens, but I think he only said that because it makes him sound cool. His actual favorite is
Cymbeline because he’s obsessed with romance. His favorite person ever is Freddie Mercury and
one time he went on for thirty minutes about his music and how perfect it is compared to anything
else in the universe; he used those exact words too.”

“Seriously?” Lucas asked with a laugh.

He nodded, “yeah. His favorite color is blue, I think at least, because he has this one ring with this
blue gem on it. He switches out all the others, but never takes that one off. He also likes to wear
clothes that ‘mesh well with his complexion’ and blue really fits. He likes to go into pet stores to
hold puppies, but he actually likes messing with the birds a lot more. He doesn’t believe parrots can
actually talk, so he goes to try and prove his theory even though it’s always wrong.”

Will paused, trying to fight down the smile on his lips. He remembered the first time Mike had
spoken on the idea and it was the first time Will had truly laughed in ages.

“Seems like an odd guy.”

“No, no he’s…he’s really nice. He’s more than nice, it’s like no matter how much he tries to act
like everyone bothers him he’d do anything to make people happy. He’s so talented but never
really takes compliments, he’s a complete nerd but isn’t embarrassed about it. His favorite movie is
The Sound Of Music because he has this dream of being a rouge nanny, but he tells everyone it's
The Godfather. He makes me actually feel like a person and drives me insane but I just always
want to be with him and make sure he’s safe, and he has a great smile. He hates being alone, and I
feel guilty because I’ve never really been there for him.”

Will paused, trying to get his heart rate under control. Lucas didn’t say a word, reading him in a
way only one other person could.

“So, what’s the problem?”

He let out a watery laugh, “me.”

“Come on Will, he obviously cares about you–”

“No, no I’m not doing this. He said he wants to be friends, that’s it. I missed my chance a-and I still
haven’t really talked about it with Jane.”

Lucas sighed, “Jane understands that Mike was never going to want her like that, I think it’s time
you get your head around that too. This isn’t about Jane, it’s about you and Mike so stop using that
as an excuse because it’s getting old.”

“Harsh.”

“Max taught me that one.”

He snorted, “I can tell.”

“Look, I’m not trying to get in the middle of it. You two are…complicated, and if you’re better as
friends that’s fine, maybe it’s better, but it’s not fair to sit here and act like Mike wouldn’t do
anything for you.”

“That’s a bit dramatic.”

“You are somehow more oblivious than Mike.”

“What?”

“Nothing, don’t worry about it.” Lucas gripped his shoulder, “I’m always here for you, you know
that right?”

Will let the topic drop, “I know. I’m here for you too.”

“You’re getting the hang of it, Byers.”

Maybe he was.

—-------

“It’s freezing.”

“I brought an extra scarf, do you want that?” Chrissy asked, sending him a timid smile.

Will glanced at it, “yes.”

“I told you to just bring gloves,” Jane said as they walked towards the open garage. It wasn’t
actually a garage, but Will was lost on what to call the space.

He wrapped the scarf around his hands, “I forgot.”

“Isn’t it too cold to play out here?” Steve asked.

Lucas shrugged, “don’t know, they have some heaters in there.”

Dustin scoffed, “they’re going to need a shit ton to actually– is that Max?”

“Hey is everything okay–”

“No, nothing is okay,” she said frantically, “Mike fucking locked himself in the bathroom and
won’t come out.”

“Do you have a key?”

Max sent Steve a glare, “where the fuck would I have gotten a key, Steve?”

“I don’t know, doesn’t this place provide keys?”

“To the bathroom? Are you serious–”

Will cut her off, “okay shut up, did something happen?”

“He’s been off all day, I think he’s just overwhelmed but he won’t talk to us. Can you just come
with me?”

His brows shot up, “me?”

“Yes you dipshit, do you think Henderson over there is gonna get through to him.”

Dustin dropped his mouth open, “hey! Mike loves me.”

“It doesn’t matter, Will just come on.”

He didn’t get another word in before Max grabbed his arm. Will was being dragged through the
sea of students, trying not to trip over himself.

“Mike, just open the door,” Robin said, standing outside the bathroom.

“Still nothing?” Max asked.

Eddie pushed himself off the wall, “nothing.”

Max sighed and started pounding on the door, “you little shit, just open up so we can help you–”

The redhead was cut off by something being thrown at the door.

“Was that a shoe?” Eddie asked.

Max huffed, “Mike, just open–”

The second shoe hit.

“Hey!”

Will stepped forward, “you’re going to get cold, put your shoes back on.”

There was a beat of silence, and Will placed his hand on the door, trying to sound out any
movement.

“Is that Will?” Mike asked, his voice tiny.

Robin rolled her eyes, “yes.”

There was shuffling, and then the lock clicked. The door squeaked open to a slit and Will watched
Mike’s hand come out.

“Where is he?”

Will pressed his brows together, “I’m right– ah!”

He didn’t get a moment to breathe before he was being yanked into the small bathroom. The door
was locked behind him, and if it was any other situation Will would have been sure he was about
to be murdered.

Mike was leaned against the wall, his face paler than usual.

“Where is your coat?” He asked.

“Really? That’s the only thing you can say?”

Will bit at his lip, “well it’s not the only thing, but it’s cold you should be wearing a coat–”

“I don’t want a coat.”

He rubbed his hands together, acutely aware that Mike wouldn’t directly look at him.

“Do you want my coat or I have this scarf–”

“Oh my god Will, stop talking about the coat.”

He sighed, “what’s wrong?”

“Everyone is making me fucking crazy.”

Will nodded, “so is that why you decided to lock yourself in the bathroom?”

“Yes.”

“Did it help?”

“Not yet,” Mike said, eyes trained on the floor, “but I’m hoping it’ll do something eventually.”

“You’re supposed to be singing right now.”

“I’m on strike.”

Will smiled slightly, “I see.”

“I was hoping you’d have better advice.”

“Well, what do you need advice for?”

Mike shrugged, “on how to get out of the bathroom.”

“Oh, then I think you yanked in the wrong person.”

Mike let out a breathy laugh, “guess so.”

“What do you want from me?” He whispered.

Mike tensed, “nothing, it’s fine you can go, didn’t mean to bother you.”
Stepping forward, Will dipped his head, trying to get Mike to look at him.

“No, tell me what you want, I’ll do anything you want, okay?”

Mike’s eyes slowly lifted, locking on him. Will swallowed, pressing his pointer finger and thumb
together, hoping it would calm his nerves.

“Can I just have a hug?”

Will gestured Mike towards him, wrapping his arms tightly around the other boy’s waist. Mike
sunk against his shoulder, and it felt like something clicked into place. They tucked together
without a flaw, their arms molding around one another.

Resting his chin on Mike’s shoulder, Will fixed his breathing so it matched the curly-headed
boy’s.

“Everything feels too loud,” Mike mumbled against his hair.

Will squeezed him, “I’m sorry.”

“It’s like I can’t get it quiet enough and then I can’t breathe and people just keep talking at me and
I want to go home.”

He nodded, “okay, you can go home, you don’t have to do anything.”

“Yes I do.”

“Do you want me to tell everyone you threw up and are running a fever?”

Mike shook his head, “no one will believe you.”

“Don’t even worry, I’ll act it up and everything. We might have to sit you in front of a heater for a
second though.”

“Hm, and then what?”

“Well, you’re gonna have to work with me. If no one believes us you’re gonna have to sneak out
the window and I’ll need to steal Lucas’ car.”

“Why can’t we just run?”

“Because you’re terrible at running– ow!” Will brought a hand up to his forehead, feeling the spot
Mike had just flicked, “you can’t do that I’m injured.”

“Oh I knew it, I always thought it was impossible that you didn’t have some kind of head injury.
Finally cracked the case.”

“At least I wasn’t dropped as a child.”

“I was not dropped as a child, my mom even said so.”

“You look like someone who was dropped– stop flicking me.”

Mike buried his face into Will’s neck, “stop making fun of my weirdly shaped head.”

“You don’t have a weirdly shaped head.”

“Yes I do, why do you think I got called frog face?”

Will pressed his lips together, trying not to laugh, “because of your cool undertones? Maybe you
were a little greener as a kid.”

“I didn’t have a chin as a kid.”

“Aw.”

“Shut up.”

He rocked them, trying to pull Mike closer. Will took the scarf that was still around his hands and
sneakily brought it up, draping it over Mike’s shoulders. It was a thick one, seeming more like a
blanket than a thin piece of fabric.

“Stop it with the scarf.”

“It’s cold.”

“ Stop ,” Mike whined as Will tied it around his neck.

“I’m trying to keep you from catching a cold.”

“You can’t actually get a cold from the cold, that's not a thing.”

Will scrunched his nose up, “what– yes it is, it’s like a hypothermia thing.”

“Nope, it’s from the bacteria.”

“You’re just making shit up,” Will muttered.

“I’m not putting a coat on, I run hot.”

“No you don’t, you’re always cold, you just refuse to wear enough clothing.”

Mike tensed, and before Will could question it the boy was pulling away from him. Suddenly, the
room felt like ice, any source of warmth disappearing as Mike stepped back.
Clearing his throat, Will shoved his hands into his pockets, realizing their short moment had been
snapped.

“Uh, sorry,” he said.

“No, it's fine. I just wasn’t expecting you to…”

“What?” Will asked as Mike trailed off, “to what?”

“Know that.”

He looked to Mike with confusion, “know what? That you get cold?”

“Yeah.”

“Do you…do you think I know nothing about you?”

Mike cleared his throat, once again not making eye contact, “I mean, you don’t really.”

Setting his jaw, Will couldn’t help that twitch of irritation inside of him. Mike had his arms tightly
crossed and it didn’t seem like he was going to be dropping them any time soon.

“Are you serious?”

“Does it look like I’m not?”

“Whatever, Mike–” he cut himself off, “oh shit, so sorry, didn’t mean to say your name. I’ll be
more careful next time.”

His tone was mocking, and Will took a step towards the door, about to rip it open when Mike’s
voice stopped him.

“Oh right, forgot that we can’t talk about how I feel ever without you making it about you–”

“Are you fucking kidding me? You got all weird with me because I knew something about you,
the only thing you’re angry about is being wrong.”

Mike narrowed his eyes, “wrong? I told you that I feel like you don’t know anything about me, and
your response is to get pissed off.”

“I’m pissed because you’re trying to make me seem like some asshole for not knowing anything
about you when I clearly do. So what else are you trying to tell me?”

“You’re such a dick sometimes, you know that?”

Will clenched his jaw, “me? I’m a dick?”

“Yes, Will–”

“Don’t say my fucking name.” Mike froze, their eyes locking, Will dropped his hand from the door
knob, “how’d that feel? Did you like it sweetheart? ”

“Shut up.”

“If you want to be angry with me fine, but don’t act like you’re fucking innocent.”

Mike looked at him with a cold glare, and Will met it with the same amount of intensity. Once
again they were standing close, his hand raising to the door but not fully touching it. Where Will
usually found himself rather calm, even with Mike, that ability was dwindling. There was a heat
growing between them, one with enough flames that it could scorch them both.

“Mike, are you feeling better now?” Max asked, her voice filtering from down the hall.
That wasn’t enough to break their eye contact, it used to have been, but not anymore. Will felt his
breath catch as Mike leaned forward. His lips parted as their foreheads were almost brushing
together. It was a challenge to keep his hands down. Will ached to shove them into Mike’s hair and
either pull it out or finally close those last few inches between them.

Then, Mike’s hand reached up and grabbed the handle, pushing the door open.

“Yeah, feeling perfect,” Mike’s words were whispered, and there was no way Max would have
been able to hear them. Will closed his eyes, trying to take a full breath.

“Good luck,” he mumbled, turning and about to take a step out of the bathroom.

“When I said that I loved you,” Will froze, his heart stopping, “I didn’t mean it.”

He glanced over at Mike, seeing the other boy’s attempt at defiance. He wanted to win whatever
fight they had just started. Apparently he was willing to turn cruel in the process.

“Yeah well, I never said it in the first place.”

Will had no plans on losing either and he walked away, not sure if he wanted to scream or cry. He
wondered if the lies between them would ever cease.
 Chapter 39
Chapter Notes

Poison & Wine- The Civil Wars

Where Will used to find enjoyment in the music, it now sounded like nothing but a high-pitched
screech. He supposed the preternatural wonder had worn off, Mike was no longer a mystery he
could paint together.

Now Will knew exactly who he was looking at. It was a just a boy, one he found himself wanting
to forget. Though, the idea of that felt petrifying.

Mike's eyes still looked the same as they did that first night, and maybe that was the most
agonizing thing. While some people may have just seen them as brown, a color just as simple as
blue or green, Will found a map within them. Mike was hidden behind layers of different paths,
displaying that a step in the wrong direction could send anyone to their doom.

Will could almost pinpoint the second he stepped into the crashing ocean, his body being pushed
off the moving ship. Mike's eyes used to be laced with a softness for him, something Will could
now see he took advantage of. The blur around the edges had been sharpened. There was nothing
there now but betrayal and boiling rage.

He should have known that would happen, no matter how much Will wanted to deny it he ruined
everything he touched. It pained him to know that the only thing he ever gave Mike was a
crippling affliction to trust and a lost sense of self.

No matter how much Will changed or grew, there would always be a lingering monster within him.
A dragon egg that only he had cracked. Taking responsibility for something so tragic was more
difficult than he could admit.

"What happened?" Jane asked, her voice cutting into his thoughts.

He swallowed thickly, "nothing happened."

"You both look miserable."

Will darted his eyes to the floor, flinching each time Mike's voice filtered through his brain. He
wanted to get out and run. There was a desire within him to leave the fire he had started and let it
burn. Though, for the first time, his feet stuck to the ground and a fire-extinguisher sat inches from
his hand.

"It's cold out."

Jane was looking up at him, a question behind her gaze. Will wanted to give her more, but didn't
want to see the disappointment morph onto her face once she knew the truth.

"Max said it looked like you two got in a fight."

Will pressed his eyes shut, "we're fine, Jane. Don't worry about it."

"If nothing happened why is he glaring at you?"

"He's not--" Lifting his head, he caught Mike's stare for the second time. If he didn't feel the same
amount of anger that Mike was sending his way, it might have been terrifying, "he's just angry with
me about something."

"Right, and why do you look equally as pissed off then?"

"Can you just drop it?" He snapped, sighing when he saw her eyebrows raise, "sorry."

"It's fine."

Mike's words from earlier should have hurt more, but he had just been spitting a truth Will already
knew. That phone call lived in his brain, the harsh voice poking in whenever he needed the
reminder.

He wanted to pull his eyes away, but it was now a challenge. Will could read Mike well enough to
understand that. The singer wanted to snap him and Will was terrified he might get his wish. Under
the lights, Mike looked like a fallen angel. At the moment, Will was okay with just calling him an
ear-splitting devil. His curls were thrown about, seeming as if they had been tugged at.

Will tried to look away, but those twisting eyes pulled him back in. Mike wasn't hiding it, putting
on the perfect display of hatred. A few times, Will felt stares turning towards him, their silent
rivalry showing itself to the outside world.

Mike wanted to win, but Will had nothing to lose. He'd destroyed everything and now they were
right at the beginning, filled to the brim with feelings that couldn't identity themselves.

"Thank you everyone, we really appreciate you coming out tonight," Mike said, finally moving his
gaze to the crowd.

Will clenched his teeth, feeling them grind together as he attempted to keep himself under control.
It didn't matter what he did or how calmly he breathed; Mike was driving him towards the brink of
insanity.

"We need to meet them in the back," Lucas said.

"What?" Will asked, his stomach twisting.

The other boy looked at him, "yeah, remember? We're all going to Robin's for an after party thing."

Will had a selective memory and that had not made the cut.

"Shit," he whispered.

No one heard him, the room still roaring with noise. Will kept his face pulled tight as they walked
to the back room. The makeshift stage disappeared from his vision, any kind of performance
officially over.

"You guys did great!" Chrissy yelled excitedly as Steve threw open the door.
Robin's face lit into a smile, "thanks! My fingers are fucking freezing."

"I told you to just wear gloves," Max said.

Eddie scoffed, "It ruins the look."

"Dude, no one can even see her back there--"

"You wouldn't understand Henderson, it's about the internal vibe."

Steve rolled his eyes, "what internal vibe? Frostbite?"

Will paid little attention to their conversation. Mike was in the corner, loudly snapping his guitar
away. He could tell the others weren't blind to the tension, but Will kept his mouth shut, knowing
the smallest sound could make it worse.

"So, are we all still good to--"

Mike cut Robin off, "I'm not going."

The first pin dropped. Will lifted his eyes, already feeling the glare digging its claws into him.
Everything went silent, and he was sure the others were piecing the puzzle together on their own.

"Mike come on, it'll be fun," Eddie said.

"Don't care, I'm going home."

Mike attempted to walk out of the room, but before he could get far Max reached out and grabbed
his arm. Will shoved his hands into his pockets, the walls were beginning to close in on him. The
four building lost its first pillar and the others came crumbling down not far after.
"No, you're supposed to be staying at mine tonight. So, you have to come."

Will felt the other boy's eyes on him and met them, raising his brow in the process. If Mike was
looking for some kind of challenge Will could give it to him.

"Fine," Mike grumbled out, yanking his arm away from Max's hold. "Yeah fine, you know what?
Since no one can ever listens to me I'll just do whatever you want. I'm at your fucking service, how
does that sound?"

"Really, Mike? You're being a dick--"

"I'm going to be whatever the hell I want, because apparently I have to explain myself to everyone
if I ever just want a fucking break."

Will let out a short breath, "okay, you're pissed at me, don't take it out on her--"

"Oh, so you're taking sides now? When the hell did you two even become friends?"

"It doesn't matter, if you're going to be an asshole just go because no one wants to hear it," Will
snapped, chest tightening with angered anxiety.

Steve raised a hand, "woah, okay guys just chill--"

"I tried to go and no one was cool with it, so now this is what you're getting," Mike said, sending
him a condescending smile.

Max crossed her arms, "god, just leave, I was trying to be nice but it's obviously not worth it right
now."

"So now you're both just ganging together too? That's perfect. Do you not remember when you
called him a piece of shit, Max? Has that just erased itself from your memory because you saw him
laying in a hospital bed?" Mike glanced to him, "because I promise he's the same asshole he was
before."

"Mike, holy shit calm down man--" Lucas wasn't able to get much out because Will felt his
stopwatch finally shatter.

"No, no let him go. I was in a hospital bed you couldn't even fucking look at right? Because it
hurt you, it was upsetting to you, everything is always about you! And all you can do is stand here
and feel sorry for yourself over a fucking argument you caused in the first place!" Will wiped his
eyes, "god, this is so fucking embarrassing."

"That's not true, you are the one--"

Will let out a dry laugh, and that was his final break. He walked towards the exit, pushing past
Mike as he went.

"You're a piece of shit," he said, slamming the door behind himself. Will felt his hands shaking, the
rush of emotion feeling like a torturous high.

Will yanked open the back door, taking in a gulp of freezing air. There were only a few cars
around, the snow falling lightly and glowing under the street lights. He hated himself for losing his
temper, especially in front of people. Will tried to sit in that humiliation, but Mike's pinched face
came back and that anger was unwavering.

The door opened again, and Will spun around.

"Oh my god, what do you want? Do you have something else to say?"

Mike crossed his arms, "yeah I have a lot of shit to say actually, and you don't get to just run away
every time--"

"I'm done. I'm done with all of this. I'm done with you," he spat out, backing away as Mike stepped
forward. The push and pull between them was causing Will's head to spin.

"That's not fair. I just want to talk to you--"

"Talk to me? Is that what you call whatever happened in there?" He asked, tossing his hand
towards the door, "I'm sick of all the talking we do because it's useless."

"It's not useless! That's the first time you ever fucking said anything, usually you just stand there
like a fucking doll and let people kick you! Talk to me!"

Will's bottom lip shook, and he took another step, wanting to run away, "I don't want to fight--"

"No, fight with me."

"What?" He asked, freezing in place.

Mike was standing tall, his face pulled with fear, "I want you to fight with me. Come on Byers, tell
me how much you fucking hate me, t-tell me that I was always worthless to you, that I meant
nothing, t-that I made you up in my head. Fight with me because I'm begging you to prove me
wrong, please."

"No."

"Yes," Mike pleaded, "yes. I-I know you hate me, I know you're done--"

"Hate you? Are you fucking kidding me?" He asked, the broken shards in his chest making
themselves known. "you want me to tell you how much I hate you? Why don't you go first since
apparently you have a lot to say."

"What--"

Will thrusted a hand out and pushed Mike's chest, "I hate you, I hate you and everything about you
and I hate you."

"Are you going to actually tell me what you're fucking talking about --"
"You! You said that to me and you think you can stand there and act like I did this? Like I fucking
owe you some love confession when all you've done is told me how much you fucking hate me?"

"I didn't do that, I-I don't remember."

"Well I remember, I think about it all the time. I came up to you the next day and you told me you
meant it. I-I can't stop thinking about it, so I'm not doing this. I know how you feel, I know--"

"Don't bullshit me, that's not fair. I was fucking drunk and I think I proved that I didn't mean that! I
answered the phone that day, does it mean nothing to you? Does everything mean nothing to you
because I said something stupid?"

"I'm supposed to thank you for not letting me bleed out?"

Mike let out a sigh, "I didn't say that--"

"But that's what you want right? You want a fucking pat on the back, to say, great job, Mike! You
saved me, you fixed me just like you always wanted to--"

"I never wanted anything from you but the truth and you couldn't even do that! It's like you can't
even listen to me o-or anyone that wants to help you!"

Will felt burning tears on his cheek, "do I have a fucking sign on my back that's asking you that
says 'I'm broken'?"

"No--"

"I don't want help! Stop trying to fucking fix me, I don't need to be saved. You told me that you
created a person in your head that wasn't real, that I was a useless and pathetic coward," Will
shoved his finger into Mike's chest, watching the other boy begin to cry, "you said that, that's all I
am! I-I'm not this angel you made up, I am nothing to you! That is what you said, a-and I'm done
trying to prove anything to you!"

Mike shook his head, "I never asked you to prove anything! You're just making shit up--"
"You want me to tell you how I feel and that's your response?"

"That's not what I meant! God, it's like talking to a fucking wall!"

"I never wanted to do this in the first place! But you can't listen to me because all you ever think
about is yourself. This isn't about whether or not you 'meant it' I feel like I have to prove myself to
you constantly and I don't know how to do that! You killed me that night! Y-You took everything
I've ever hated about myself and fucking shoved it in my face!" Will's voice was raw, their screams
moving around the open space.

"I fucked up! I fucked up, okay? Is that what you want to hear? I said shit because I don't know
how to think and I wanted you to hurt like I did, I wanted you to feel what I did because you broke
my fucking heart. I fell in love with you and y-you turned around and told me I meant nothing to
you. T-That I was just some...some toy you had fun messing with! Do you know how it feels to beg
someone to love you?"

Will looked towards the ground, his shoulders shaking with sobs, "I did that to you?"

"More than once."

He clenched his eyes shut, "fuck, I'm just like him."

"What?"

Will stumbled back, "I'm just like him! I just mess everything up, that's all I know how to do, that's
all I've ever done. I don't know how to care about people, I-I don't-- all I can fucking do is shut up
and even that's wrong, everything I do is just fucking wrong a-and I can't talk to you about it, I
can't do any of it right."

"Why not? Why can't you talk to me?" Mike walked forward, desperation radiating off of him,
"come on please, please. I want to know things about you--"

"You don't want to know things about me, the fucking second you saw me as something other than
this...this thing you made up I was a shitty asshole, you looked at me like I was some kind of m-
monster, you don't want to know anything--"

"I do! I do want to know, I-I was there. I wanted to be there for you, with your dad you could have
talked to me I would have--"

Will felt his chest tighten, "you don't get to use that, you don't want--"

"I do! I want to know--"

There was that second pin, the pillar that left the broken house on its feet. In front of his eyes, Will
watched it fall and then there was nothing there to hide behind. Mike was sobbing, his face
reddened with heartbreak. Will finally broke for the final time. Knocking down the last of his
ruined home.

"Know what? What do you want to know? T-That I'm fucking unlovable, that all those bruises and
scars on my back were from him? I was never anything but I waste of space, all I knew-- know
how to do is shut up and take it. I take all of this shit because it doesn't matter how I feel! I-It
doesn't matter that I tried and tried to be worth something only to be fucking beaten and thrown
into walls whenever I opened my mouth! I tried for years to be good enough and I'm exhausted,
Mike. No one was there for me a-and it didn't matter what I did, it didn't matter how hard I tried I
was never good enough for him! And I was never going to be good enough for you either!"

Mike's face had paled, his lips parted with shock, "Will..."

"I am pathetic I know--"

"You're not--"

"Fucking god, don't change your mind now--"

"Would you just let me speak!" Mike yelled, voice breaking with each word, "you're so stubborn,
do you ever stop to think that maybe I just wanted you? That I wanted to be with you, t-that it
didn't matter that I was fucking terrified of having feelings for you, because you were always good
enough for me."
Will slowly shook his head, tears dipping into his mouth, "no, no I wasn't, I wasn't--"

"I know you think that I don't know anything, and fuck maybe I don't, but you were my friend, do
you remember that? And I loved you just like that too, you don't need to prove anything to me.
Why is it so hard for you to believe that I fell in love with you because you're just you?"

Will bit the inside of his cheek, "because I hate myself."

There was a beat of silence.

"Well, I think you're pretty great." Mike paused, "and you're pissing me off right now and I can't
stand you when you're being a stubborn asshole, but I still love you."

He let out a watery laugh, looking up to meet Mike's eye. Something had softened, it was small, the
change not drastic; but now the sharpened edges had been erased.

"I don't know why."

Mike looked small under the street light, "my car's over there do you want to go just...sit?"

Will wiped his eyes, "yeah, sitting would be nice."

It was a short walk, but Will was already exhausted once he was able to sit down. Mike's car was a
disaster, and he had to hold his tongue so he didn't scold the other boy for the mess.

"Turn on the heat."

"Would you give me three seconds?" Mike grumbled out, pulling the door closed.

"I feel like you're taking a long time."

"I'm not taking--" Mike cut himself off, letting out a long breath, "okay sunshine, I turned the seat
warmer on, are you good now?"

"I'll let you know in a few minutes," he muttered, pulling the sleeves of his jacket over his hands.

"Are we going to talk?"

"I thought we just talked--"

"Will."

He sighed, squeezing his eyes shut, "I know, I'm sorry."

"Did you really just-- I don't know, when we got together, were you really just planning on
breaking up with me the whole time?" Mike's voice was small, as if the question itself terrified
him.

"I wasn't really thinking at all. Everything kept getting worse, or I guess I kept making it worse.
When Jane told me she liked you I kind of..." Will looked to his hands, "I really liked you too, but
she's my sister and I've been trying to keep her safe and happy my entire life, so I thought, ya know
what's one more time? I can just be miserable, I know how to do that. At first I really thought you
liked her back too, I didn't know that you didn't until we got in that fight."

"The first one."

Will snorted, "yeah, the first one. First bad one I guess. I never wanted to hurt you, I didn't want to
hurt anyone and then you were screaming at me and I...I couldn't move."

"What do you mean?" Mike pressed, his voice dancing above a whisper.

"When my dad would get pissed at me I had a little list of things to do. I could apologize and then
keep my mouth shut. Trying to explain myself always just made it worse. I don't know, I thought it
might work with you too." He tried to swallow the lump in his throat, "didn't really do the job."
"I don't want you to just say things you think I want to hear."

"Well, I did a great job at that then because you ended up angry at me anyway."

Mike shifted in his seat, the hot air blowing on them, "I'm sorry for what I said that night. I didn't
mean it, and I'm sorry for what I did in front of everyone. I probably humiliated you."

"It's okay." Will looked up, sending Mike a tiny smile, "I fucked up. I should never have done that
to you and I...and I do see you as a person, I care. I think I just got so distracted by constantly
freaking out that I forgot the person I'd end up hurting was you. I'm usually so good about shutting
up and disappearing and then you came along and ruined it."

"Thank you, I do a lot of that."

"That's not what I meant."

Mike's gaze softened once again, "I know."

There was a silence, one that came to Will with open arms. It was comfortable, and almost brought
a new wave of tears to his eyes. Mike's face was tinted pink, though Will couldn't figure out if it
was from the freezing weather or the waves of warm air blowing at them.

"I do love you," he got out, voice cracking. Mike's eyes moved over to him, they were wide and
filled with a vulnerability that Will wanted to sink into, "you were my best friend too, and I...this is
hard for me, but you mean a lot to me and I'm sorry. I'm really sorry."

"You're still my best friend," Mike said, "and I'm sorry too."

"Still?"

Mike went quiet, his face still holding a serious edge to it, "I'm not willing to admit I lost you in the
first place. I don't care what happens between us, you mean everything to me."
His heart sped up, "Mike..."

"I'm shit at showing you, I know that, but I...I almost watched you die, Will. I don't care how
irritating you get or if you end up hating me at some point, I can't lose you."

"You're not going to lose me," he said, voice trembling, "you never lost me."

"It feels like I did."

"Yeah well, it feels like I lost you too." Will looked to his lap, "and I think that's one of the most
terrifying things that's ever happened to me."

He heard Mike's breath catch, "me?"

"Yeah you, you scare the shit out of me."

"Is it because I memorized Shakespeare plays?"

Will let out a relieved laugh, "oh no, I actually missed that."

"Everyone else hates it."

"They suck."

Mike felt him a dopey smile, "yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Also, I'm sorry for everything that happened in there. I was just--"
Will cut him off, "you wanted to fight with me."

"I wanted to see if you actually felt something, a-and I didn't know how to get that out of you
without pissing you off. I'm sorry."

Mike fidgeted nervously with his fingers, quickly spinning the blue ring around. Absent-mindedly,
Will reached into his pocket and pulled out his keys, handing them in the other boy's direction.

"Why do you do that?" Mike asked, causing Will to look at him with surprise.

"Your keys, you give them to me like I'm a puppy with a chew toy or some shit."

Will cocked his head to the side, "oh sorry, it just makes you stop pulling at your rings, when you
pull at your rings it hurts your fingers. You've got sensitive skin, Mike."

"I have sensitive..." Mike trailed off, looking slightly entranced.

"Skin," he said, carefully finishing the other boy's sentence.

"Oh. O-Oh right yeah, sorry." Mike held the keys tightly, "thank you."

"I feel like there's something else I should be apologizing for," he said after a long moment.

Mike nodded, "me too."

"Well we can...have time? If you still want to be friends." That last word felt stale in Will's mouth,
but he tried to hide the twinge it sent through him.

Mike cleared his throat, "yeah friends."

"Best friends."

"Yeah. Best friends."

They stared at each other, and Will felt something else tickling his tongue. He couldn't form the
sentence, knowing to would crack the careful truce they had created. Mike's eyes darted to his lips
and Will sucked in a breath, turning his head forward. His heart was shattering the last bit of its
cage.

"I think...for now or just--" Mike cut himself off, obviously trying to find his words, "I think
friends is better."

"Right."

"Should we uh...go to Robin's? I feel like we probably need to let them know we didn't kill each
other." Mike was already buckling, decision made.

"Don't you need your guitar?" He asked, trying to hide the stiffness in his tone.

"No, it doesn't fit in my car, Max puts it in hers." He paused, "hopefully at least."

The drive felt longer than it actually was, their conversation still holding an air of tension. Will
knew there were millions of things unsaid between them, but he felt like there had been a start. He
no longer had the desire to scream in Mike's face. That need had finally been sated, though he
couldn't help but feel guilty over his harsh words.

"This will be interesting," Mike said as they pulled up to the house, everyone else already seeming
to be there.

"Yeah." Will felt something in his chest pounding, begging to come out and reveal itself.

"If we get lucky they might just act like nothing happened."
Will clenched his fists, "hey uh, just so you know I don't see you as a friend and I haven't for a long
time."

Mike's face had turned an interesting shade of red, any movement he had been making completely
halting. Silence rung out through the car, and Will itched to get out and leave the tremendously
awkward situation.

"I just thought you deserved to know."

With that, he stepped out of the car, letting the the cold air sink into him. Something within him
felt wrong, though Will assumed it was because he had left his heart right back with its owner.
Now he just had to hope it wouldn't get crushed without his protection.
 Chapter 40
Chapter Notes

Samson- Regina Spektor

Only three overhead lights were on. Though, he wasn't sure why they bothered to turn any on in
the first place. Mike appreciated it nonetheless, walking down a hallway with dimness to keep
them lit was not as hard as it sounded but definitely inconvenient.

It was a safe haven, somewhere Mike could run off to and experience a moment of silence. His feet
squeaked against the odious floors, causing him to winch with each step. It didn't seem to matter
how carefully he walked, the whimpering sound rang without his permission.

The day had been short, much shorter than he reasoned a Monday could be. There was a possibility
it was because his mind had drifted off. Based on the concerned looks that had been sent his way,
Mike was sure he wasn't hiding it either.

He leaned back against an unused locker, sighing as the pressure on his back released. When he
was a kid December was the best month. It was a time filled with family and the constant scent of
pine.

Now there was nothing but dreary weather. Mike wished the month would go faster so he could
stop feeling sorry for himself. It was their last week of school before break and he was dreading
the days of home, not knowing if his family would be there or he'd wait near the door for people
that had no plans of showing up.

Mike glanced at the exit, nose pinching when he noticed the beginning of rain drops. His goal had
been to wait inside the school until everyone else left so he'd have an easy out, and it seemed that
plan was now punishing him. A real slap in the face. It was too cold to just rain, but not cold
enough to snow.

In the middle of that was ice. Probably the most dangerous of them all.

"Shit," he muttered, pushing himself off the lockers. His car was parked near the gym, and that
would be his best bet on getting out without slipping and breaking his head. Or snapping his neck.
Or shattering the little shell around his brain.

Mike really didn't want to interact with anyone who might be near that part of the school; but as he
watched the rain pick up, his option of making a run for it was dwindling.

No one occupied the halls, lights already beginning to flicker off with a threat of no school the
next day. Mike stopped as he made it near the gym, trying not to groan in frustration as he heard
chatter coming from inside.

It was no use, but in his attempt to turn invisible, Mike bent his head and held onto his backpack
straps. He pushed the door open, wincing as the room went silent.

"Hey, Wheeler!"

He was barely able to step inside. Mike heard Jason's voice moving closer, but kept walking, his
eyes trained on the exit out. It was being smacked with rain pellets, each one becoming firmer each
hit.

Mike couldn't make it far before an arm was being wrapped around his shoulder and he was
yanked away from his escape.

"What do you want?" He asked, trying to feign some kind of confidence.

The blond sent him a smirk, his face smudged with sweat. It seemed that Mike was intruding on
the beginning of their basketball practice.

"Never thought I'd see you in a gym."

He flushed as other's laughed at the horrendous joke, "just trying to get to my car."

"What's with the attitude?"

Mike sighed, "can I just leave--"

"Hey dude, this is the kid from homecoming right?" Another guy asked, his face unfamiliar to
Mike.

Jason snorted out a laugh, "yep this is him."

"Shit man, how'd you turn Byers gay?"

Mike felt his heart sink, "what?"

"Yeah, I mean, he's obviously not the type."

There was laughter. That haunting and sick laughter Mike heard in his nightmares. He swallowed,
the action unnatural and causing him to almost choke.

"What did you do, slip him something?"

Mike pulled on his fingers, wanting to feel them bleed, "I didn't-- no I didn't do anything to him,
we're just friends--"

"Not what you said. Come on Wheeler, it's cool. I mean, it's not like everyone couldn't tell
something was up with you," Jason said, nudging his arm a little too hard. It seemed like the boy
was finally getting his revenge.

Mike should've taken his chances in the rain. Maybe he would have gotten lucky and actually
shattered his brain home.

"Nothing is up with me, just let go."

"Wheeler, we could all tell. Did you just decide to date guys cause you know no girls wouldn't go
out with you?" Jason's voice was cutting, the enjoyment obvious on his face.
Other members of the team slowly started to walk forward with peaked interest, making Mike's
hands begin to sweat.

"I-I'm not--"

"Oh you're not what? Gay?"

He flinched, and it was clear Jason grasped some delectation from that.

"Don't like that word or some shit? Maybe next time don't announce it to the whole school that you
like dick."

"Wheeler!" Jason stepped back quickly as the gym doors flew open, "what are you doing in the
middle of our practice?"

Mike tried to calm his trembling hands, "I was just leaving, Coach. Sorry."

Without another word, he hurried out, not caring as rain smacked him in the face. He'd done a
pretty decent job at avoiding Jason, though it was somewhat of a full time job. When he wasn't
alone it was fine, Mike knew how to defend everyone but himself. It was a gift and a curse all
wrapped in one.

Getting to his car, Mike fell inside, continuously wiping the tears that tried to leak. Even though
Jason couldn't see him, he couldn't give the boy any satisfaction. Mike tried to remind himself that
it wasn't wrong, but the humiliation still bubbled inside, that laughter scratching at him over and
over again.

Mike rested his head forward, eyes catching something on the ground. Furrowing his brows, he
reached down, feeling sparks spin in his stomach when he figured out what it was.

It was Will's scarf.

He held it in his hands, the cold fabric sending shockwaves through him. It had been a week since
their fight, and Mike felt utterly lost. Every conversation they had was smothered in awkwardness,
and he could never say the right thing. What Will had said left him reeling, desperate to understand
what to do with it and how to fix the snapped seams between them.

So far nothing had worked, and it sent Mike deeper into the jail of his mind. Will had opened a
door for him, and Mike kept accidently closing it and then jamming it as well, and then locking it
and losing the keys in a bush or something. It was a continuous cycle.

With a frustrated grunt, Mike turned the car on, watching the windshield wipers sweep into view.
They were practically useless, splashing the water around but not doing anything to help his vision.

Driving several miles under the speed limit, Mike tried to focus his mind. Will's scarf laid in his
lap, and Jason's words were impossible to forget, but the dangerous task of driving kept him
distracted. Maybe it was a sign he needed to be more of a risktaker, do something like skydiving or
swimming with sharks to finally get his brain to shut up.

Mike rushed out, trying not to fall as he finally got home. He was soaked, his skin feeling like ice.

The house was silent, only one standing lamp turned on. Mike looked around, trying to find any
sign of life. He locked the door behind himself and shuffled into the kitchen, not caring that water
was trailing behind him. On the counter sat a nicely folded note.

"Mike, I am at Grandma's with Holly, we will be back after dinner. I left some food in the fridge
for you to heat up. Your father won't be home until late, but don't leave the house a mess. I love
you." He read it, voice coming out muffled.

He crumbled up the perfectly written note and tossed it at the wall. Mike knew she was trying, and
that was something to be grateful for. Holly was back to, but when he looked at his little sister they
didn't recognize each other anymore. She was a stranger to him now, grown into a kid that could
finally think for herself. Mike feared she now knew how abandoned she had been by everyone.

By him.

"Fuck!" He cursed, yelling out into the open space. Repeating the word over again, Mike felt
angered adrenaline pump through him, warming up his frozen veins. There was a small family
picture sitting on the counter, the frame decorated in cheap gold paint. Without a second thought,
he flung it onto the ground, watching it shatter into pieces.
Mike's breathing came out heavily, and as exhaustion came over him he realized the mess that had
been made.

"Damn it," he groaned, squeezing his eyes shut. Mike was almost glad no one was home, because
he probably looked like a maniac.

Grabbing the broom, Mike tried to stay far away from the glass. He knew the damage it could do.
Carefully, he collected it into the pan and tossed it. Bending down, he narrowed his eyes to try and
find any lose pieces.

His burst of anger had past, and now he was left with something humorous. The outburst had been
ridiculous, Mike was aware of that while it was happening; but now that he was standing in a dark
room with soaking clothes it felt like he was crappy film scene.

With that in mind, he trudged up the stairs to his room. Mike peeled the wet clothes off, shivering
as the open air hit his skin. He layered things on, curling into the warmth that welcomed him.
Sitting on his bed, Mike stared out the window. Rain hit the glass, trying to make its way inside but
failing each time.

The sky was dark, any sign of spring or fall having diminished. Mike used to enjoy the lack of sun.
It was a refreshing thing to hide in. Without a spotlight there was never a fear of doing something
wrong. In hindsight Mike knew that wasn't true, he knew exactly what he was hiding from.
Though, letting himself accept it was significantly more difficult.

Truths lived in the light, unhidden and burning with passion. With the brightness and ability to see,
there was pain and burns that could be left on the skin, words written beneath them that were never
supposed to be heard. Along with those burns came healing, stronger patches of skin rising to
protect that wound. It could no longer be hidden, the flesh forever changed, but it might just be
better that way. It had learned and changed, now riddled with that journey.

Maybe that's why people liked tattoos. It was a permanent alteration, but it told a story. Someone's
life could be written within the lines of their skin. Years of living displayed for passing eyes to see.
Though, in darkness those marks were hard to make out, the beauty of individual identities cut off.

Perfect statues hid in the dark, but flawed people would always need a hint of light.

As Mike continued to gaze out, he wished he could see the sun.

----------

For hours he sat there, ignoring the piles of homework that threatened him. His mind moved from
topic to topic within a few seconds, and as he heard his family get home and make their way to
bed, Mike got stuck on one thing.

The scarf laid on the floor. It was still damp, most likely not smelling very fresh. It was nothing
special, Mike doubted Will was in search of it; but that small piece of fabric kept his attention on a
certain green-eyed boy. His thoughts finally sticking.

Guilt.

Mike's stomach tightened every time he remembered what he'd said to Will, he was disgusted with
himself. In the moment it all felt meaningless on his tongue, but as he saw the effects of those
words take action, it made him sick. He wanted Will to be angrier with him, to force him to make it
better and apologize enough times that things could be fixed. Sadly, he wasn't gifted that easy out.

He wished for Will to care more, to chase him. Mike knew it was selfish, but believing that Will
truly saw him as something felt like a fabricated dream. The words were there, but the reality didn't
exist.

Or maybe he was too blind to see it.

Glancing at the clock, Mike saw it was almost eleven. Which meant that his next course of action
was a terrible one and would most likely get him in trouble.

Luckily, that never stopped him before. With a wave of confidence Mike snatched the scarf off the
ground and quietly made his way downstairs. The rain hadn't stopped, but he ignored that obstacle.
Mike knew he wasn't in his right mind, the pumping emotions causing his vision to fog.

Mike took his keys, barely putting on his shoes before leaving the house, wincing as rain hit him. It
was bordering near ice pellets. The only thing he could be proud of himself about was driving
carefully, the car barely moving as he moved down the icy roads.
The Byers house came into view and Mike suddenly felt anxious. The porch light was on, but he
knew going up and knocking on the door was a horrible idea. So, doing what any desperate person
would, he walked around the house until he found Will's window. Surprisingly, it was open, a light
pouring out.

Mike peeked inside, blinking away the tears of rain. He could make out Will's silhouette. He was
hunched on his bed, seeming to be holding his sketch book. Though, his hand wasn't moving, the
boy actually looked to be frozen. It was sadder than Mike could stomach to admit.

Raising his hand, Mike knocked on the window, flinching when he heard the loud gasp Will let
out, his book flying across the room. Then their eyes met and all Mike could do was send an
awkward smile, his face muscles turning into Alaska.

The window was thrown open, Will's flushed face coming into view.

"Hello."

"What the hell are you doing?" Will whisper yelled.

"I uh...I need-- want-- needed-- want to-- fuck," his teeth chattered as he took a deep breath, "to see
you, I'm here to see you. I brought your scarf."

He held the dripping piece of cloth up for good measure, though it didn't look very impressive.
Will's mouth was dropped open, his brain not seeming to be processing the scene at hand. Mike
wiped his eyes, the rain turning into hail.

"Please let me come inside," he asked, voice cracking as if he was a small child.

That seemed to snap Will out of his trance, "oh my god you're-- oh my god, it's freezing rain, you're
standing in ice what the hell-- you drove in ice--"

"Will."

"Oh right, sorry. Okay uh, just walk to the front door and I'll let you in."
Mike made his way back around the house, trying not to fall before getting towards the iced over
steps. Will was standing there with the door open, and Mike barely could take a breath before he
was being yanked into the warm home.

"Thank you," he breathed out, trembling as Will continued to stand there in shock.

"Okay um, alright just take your shoes off and I'll get you some clothes."

Mike easily flung them by the door, not having bothered to tie his sneakers in the first place.

Will nodded swiftly, "be quiet and go sit in the bathroom."

"Woof," Mike said under his breath.

"What was that?"

"Nothing."

Will pinched his brows together, "go."

Mike stood in the tiny room as Will walked off. His face was extremely pale, lips turning blue. He
know realized what a bad idea it had been. Before he could think too much into it, the door opened
again and Will handed him a sweatshirt, some pants, and socks.

"They might be a little too small but it should work. You can just throw your clothes into the
bathtub."

"Thanks."

Will cleared his throat, "good uh, when you're done just come to my room. Is that...okay?"
"Yeah, yeah that's fine," he paused, "thanks--"

Mike wasn't able to finish as Will pulled the door shut. He closed his eyes, body finally heating up
from embarrassment. It was most definitely a mistake to come in the first place.

Slowly, he got redressed. Will's sweatshirt was a little bit too big, which was surprising in its own
right. Though, the pants hit him at a slightly weird spot. Mike's hair was still dripping as he pulled
on the socks, the freezing droplets making him shiver.

After a few minutes, he worked up the courage and left the bathroom, heart pounding as he pushed
Will's door open. The other boy was plugging a tiny heater into the wall, piles of blankets stacked
on the bed.

"Good you're-- good. Did you say something when I left? I didn't mean to walk off I just thought
you were done and then I felt bad and I didn't want to reopen the door in case you got naked," Will
rushed out, his voice itching with nerves.

Mike felt his lips twitch, "I don't think I could have undressed in two seconds."

"Right, yeah uh...sorry."

"I mean it's okay, I didn't really say anything." He paused, "it's fine."

Mike pressed the door shut, looking around the room. It was warmly lit, illuminating the rain
hitting the window. It used to be such a cold space, but Mike noticed the slight change.

For the first time it felt like Will.

"Shit, your hair."

That snapped Mike out of his musings, "what?"

Will walked over to him, a towel in hand, "sit down I'll help."

"You don't have to--"

"Let me help." Will's voice was a breezed whisper, "please."

Mike met those deep eyes and slunk down onto the edge of the bed. Will stood over him, taking
the towel and scrunching up the ends of his hair. It was so delicate, and Mike would have believed
nothing was happening if it weren't for the boy's stomach in his view. He kept his head tilted up,
watching as Will concentrated. It wasn't a task that needed much focus, but Will looked as if he
was discovering a new planet. All the wonder and splitting attention narrowed.

His hair carefully fell into curls, a few pieces plopping onto his forehead. There was something
special about the way Will did it. In the back of his mind Mike knew he only thought that because
he was entrapped by the boy, but his touch felt like quintessential magic.

"Now it's gonna be frizzy," Mike whispered, his voice shaking.

Will met his eye, movements slowing, "it's always frizzy, has no one told you that?"

He couldn't help but smile, "Max tried but I think she's just jealous of my good looks."

"Mhm, you could get some gel." Will dropped the towel, but still stood over him. It made Mike's
chest swim and he fought with himself not to wrap his arms around the boy's waist.

"Gel makes it crunchy, do you really want me to have crunchy hair, William?"

Will rolled his eyes, "that's not true, just don't put the whole tube on your head."

"Actually if you're going to use gel you have to use the whole bottle. You really know nothing
about hair."

"You're not wrong about that." Will's smile dipped, "what are you doing here?"
Mike looked away, biting at his cheek, "I told you, your scarf--"

"Mike."

Will always said his name so beautifully. It was intimate in a way no one else could get it to be. He
ached to hear the boy say it again, but knew it might continue to break him.

"Sorry, sorry I know you said not to say that I just forgot and I was being shitty last time--"

"What?" Mike cut him off, his heart breaking when he realized where the conversation was going.

Will took a step back, and if Mike had zero self control he might have actually whined and threw
some kind of fit. Luckily, he wasn't a toddler and could hold those emotions in. Kind of. Will
crossed his arms, eyes darting down.

"Hey no, no don't do that," Mike said, standing up, a dripping fear coming over him.

"Do what? I'm not doing..."

Mike pushed Will's arms away from his chest, leaving the shield thrown to the floor. Through their
time together he noticed that when Will did that specific motion things went downhill quickly.

"Oh," Will said.

There was a breathing pause, and Mike took in how close they were standing. A crack of thunder
sounded outside, but compared to his beating heart it was nothing but a feather dropping. Will's
eyes gleamed up at him, the twisting green color catching in the light. Mike's brows moved
together involuntarily, giving away his desperation. He wondered what Will saw from him,
wanting to know if he looked as hopeless as he felt.

"I'm sorry," Mike said, causing Will to break eye contact, "I'm just...I needed to say it again."
"It's okay, we talked--"

"No we didn't."

Will bit his lip, but didn't deny that truth. A shiver ran up his spine, his body not fully recovered
from the below freezing temperatures.

"Oh yeah you're cold, sorry you can--" Will cut himself, grabbing a blanket and walking towards
the vent.

"What are you doing?"

"Making a bubble," Will muttered as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. The green-eyed
boy sat down and held up some of the blanket. A silent invitation.

Mike swallowed thickly, folding his hands together as he took a seat. Will tossed the blanket over
his legs, and he understood the appeal in seconds. Warmth spread around their bottom halves, the
heater in the corner supply comforting air for the rest of the room.

"This is nice," he said.

Will grinned, "I know."

For a moment, Mike just listened to the rain. Thunder rumbled lowly, but it wasn't enough to break
him out of his thoughts. Will sat close, and even the simple closeness made his heart soar, hands
beginning to sweat. Their arms were pressed together, and Will radiated warmth, his body
reminding Mike of a pillow that just got taken out of the dryer.

"I was a dick."

Will glanced at him, "Yeah. So was I."

"No, no it's not...the things I said to you they just..." he looked down at his hands, "it makes me
sick. I didn't mean any of it, I'm just a fucking idiot and I wanted to get some reaction out of you. I
know that's not fair and it's actually really messed up, and I said I hated you and I was just upset
and I don't mean it, I could never hate you. Believe me I tried and it didn't work at all. I should
have...I don't know, when you asked me that at school I had no idea what you were talking about a-
and you looked so upset and that was the first time I actually saw something from you and I just...I
wanted to--"

"Hurt me like I hurt you."

Mike squeezed his eyes shut, "yeah. I felt like a piece of shit after don't worry. I don't know how to
deal with all of this and I just keep talking. At homecoming I...I should have understood, I should
have--"

"No that's not fair." Will nudged his shoulder, "what you said sucked, but I didn't do much better. I
hurt you too, you don't have to forget about that just because you feel guilty. I lied to you, took
advantage of you being kind of oblivious. No offense."

"None taken."

"I um..." Will cleared his throat, obviously struggling with his next words, "I can't really think of a
lot of things at one time, especially if someone is yelling at me. It's kind of like...like when you're
taking a math test but just found out your dog died. I can't pay attention to the math test, even
though it's really important because I mean...my dog just died."

"What?" Mike asked, a hint of laughter in his tone.

Will groaned, "shut up, I'm trying."

"Okay I'm sorry, I'm sorry go ahead. Tell me about your dead dog, baby." Mike said the words
teasingly, melting as Will covered his face, laughter spilling past his lips.

"You're embarrassing me."

"In front of who? Your sixteen million heaters?"

Will's cheeks were flushed pink, the smile never leaving him, "I like to keep warm."

"I know. Now come on, I'm sorry for interrupting you." He brushed some hair away from Will's
eyes, trying to encourage the boy to keep talking.

"Well um. I don't know I'm bad at explaining it. I feel like I've had to watch out for Jane my whole
life, so that's just what I know how to do I guess. Then you came along and kind of messed with
me and I..." Their eyes met, Will's pupils dilating. Mike assumed it was from the light shift, "I...I
really liked you, I mean I really really liked you; but then she told me she liked you and that's all I
could focus on. I didn't want to hurt her, and I didn't want to hurt you either but I knew how to
handle her better. So when you freaked out I just wanted you to hate me because it was easier. I
didn't deserve for you to be understanding."

"That's not true."

"But that's how I felt, I still feel like that. It's like I wanted you to say all those things because then
it just confirmed what I thought about myself. That I'm just a pathetic coward."

Even hearing those words made his skin crawl, "I don't think those things about you. You are by
far the strongest person I've ever met, and I shouldn't think this because you're supposed to see
people's flaws and all that shit, but I think you're perfect."

"I'm not, that's how I tried to act before all of this happened. Now you've seen me be
just...everything and I'm too much work and I--"

"And I still think you're perfect."

Will sniffed, his eyes watering, "don't say that."

"We're supposed to be honest with each other."

"I know, but you're also supposed to be mad at me."

"Well you're supposed to be mad at me too. I mean...you know what I said before the show last
week?"

Will's face flashed with realization, "yeah."

"I didn't mean that at all."

"I know."

Mike's lips parted, breathing becoming more difficult as Will's eyes gazed into his own. There was
a silence between them, one he was too nervous to break.

"I know you loved me, you did a really good job at showing it. I'm sorry I sucked." Will paused,
visibly swallowing, "you saved my life, Mike. You trusted me when I needed you to, and I know
that you said some shitty things, I know that, but you showed me you didn't mean any of it. That
was really annoying too because it was a lot harder to feel bad for myself."

Mike felt tears tears gather in his eyes, "I'm sorry for avoiding you in the hallway."

"You're just finding anything to apologize for," Will said with a watery laugh.

He flushed, "I'm just...I feel bad, you just kind of freaked me out, a-and I didn't visit you in the
hospital and I should have I just-- I couldn't see you like that, I didn't know how to handle it so I
ran away. For awhile every time I looked at you all I saw was that fucking blood, it was like you
were dripping in it. It was terrifying."

"I'm sorry."

Mike shook his head, "no, no. God, don't apologize you did nothing wrong--"

"I shouldn't have called you, y-you shouldn't have had to see that. I'm so sorry, I'm sorry--"

"Hey, hey stop that." Mike scooted closer, keeping his voice soft, "I'm glad you called me. I would
rather see you hurt than dead, I will never regret picking up the phone because now you're here and
that's what matters, right?"

Will wiped his eyes, "yeah."

"Is that...how is your hand?"

"Sucks. I keep trying because I'm supposed to train the muscles, but nothing works and I just feel
like it's ruined. Do you remember the glass in my hand?"

Mike's stomach churned and he pushed the memories away, "yeah...yeah I remember."

"It was deep enough to mess up some of my nerves or something. Now I can't grip anything right
and sometimes my hand just stalls." He paused, "I can't draw."

"Is that what you were trying to do when I got here?"

Will nodded, "yeah, barely made a line."

"Did you at least make some of a line?"

"Yeah."

Mike smiled brightly, "wow! Look at that? You're making progress."

Will bent his head, something he tended to do when laughing. Mike wasn't sure why, but now
found himself wanting to crack that secret open.

"Shut up, you can't make fun of me about anything, you're the one that drove in an ice storm."

"Twice."
"What?"

Mike shrugged, "I did it twice today, does that make me badass?"

"No it makes you an idiot."

"A badass idiot."

Will snorted, "did you get home late?"

His mood dropped, "uh yeah, something like that--"

"What happened?"

Mike jolted, not having expected to be clocked that fast, "what? Nothing happened, everything's
fine."

"No something happened, did you get hurt?" Will asked, his eyes darting over Mike's hunched
form.

"No, no it's fine. I just ran into Jason and you know how he is."

"Did he say something?"

Mike shrugged, trying to seem nonchalant, "likes to talk about me being...gay and stuff, saying shit
about how I 'turned you'. It just makes me feel gross."

"I should have broken his nose."

He smiled, "It would have helped, thanks for nothing."

"He's a jackass don't listen to him," Will licked his bottom lip, "he was my first kiss."

Mike felt his heart stop, pure shock about to send him into cardiac arrest. Will's face was pinched
with disgust, and Mike had to stop himself from bursting into laughter.

"You're fucking with me."

"Nope. Freshman year he asked me to 'help him out' because he found out I was gay, It was
horrible barely a peck--"

Mike snorted loudly, covering his mouth when Will looked at him with wide eyes. The rain and
thunder were growing outside the window, but it now felt like background noise.

"I'm sorry, oh my god that's so disgusting. You actually let him kiss you?"

"Biggest mistake I've ever made, he was terrible at it. Then he told me not to tell anyone or he'd kill
me."

Mike scrunched up his nose in distaste, "well you told me."

"You don't count you're special." Will said it as if it was some kind of fact, and Mike didn't even
try to deny what that did to him. "And besides, you didn't 'turn me' Uncle Jessie from Full House
did. Or he helped at least."

"Oh yeah...yeah that's a good one."

Will nodded, "who was it for you?"

"You," he said without thinking.

"Oh."

Mike's cheeks flamed up, and he couldn't turn to look at the other boy. He should have said
something else to keep the mood light, but apparently he was too idiotic for that. Will sat silently
next to him, seeming taken back by the honest response.

"Sorry."

"No, no I just wasn't expecting that."

He bit at his bottom lip, "so thank you for that."

"For what?"

"Thanks for letting me fall in love with you, it was a lot of fun." Mike turned his head, forcing Will
to look at him.

There wasn't much light in the room, but it haloed around Will, catching in his hazel eyes. Mike
thought he looked like some kind of angel, gifted to the earth to show people what true beauty was.

"I..." Will trailed off, a sharp brightness illuminating his face as lightening struck for the first time.

Mike's skin was beginning to burn, the warm air flooding over them finally taking effect, but he
couldn't move. It was impossible to do much of anything when Will was looking at him with such
intensity.

"Did it scar?"

Will let out a stuttering breath, "what?"

"Your hand."
Without breaking eye contact, Will slowly moved his right hand into view. With an excruciating
reluctance, Mike looked down. There was a deep red line leading up towards Will's middle finger,
it appeared jagged and he couldn't imagine what that pain might have been like. Gently, Mike
cupped Will's hand in his own, running his thumb across the scar.

Lifting his eyes once more, he caught Will's with an ease. The boy looked hypnotized, his gaze
unmoving and causing Mike's heart to beat. It was chasing after its other half, trying to break away
from his body and finally be reunited with it's deepest desire. Attempting not to shake, Mike
brought Will's hand to his lips, leaving a gentle kiss on the tattooed skin.

Will sucked in a gasp, but didn't move, allowing Mike to keep his lips in place. Waves of scorching
heat ran through each of Mike's veins, pumping him free of the freezing rain just outside the four
walls.

His hand was strong, calloused with years of activity, but Mike had never felt a softer touch. Will
had an entrancing delicacy, each patch of skin telling a hidden story that Mike was desperate to
understand. He kissed up the line of Will's hand until he made it to the end.

"I think it suits you," he whispered against the boy's palm.

Will's just was heaving, "what?"

"The scar, it suits you."

Reluctantly, he put Will's hand back down, locking their eyes back together. He wanted him to
understand, to see that no matter what, Mike was helplessly in love with him. He had to stop
himself from begging Will to want him as they sat their, stares locked with a sense of unfulfilling
power. The surface had been broken, but was yet to fall.

Mike knew he wasn't the one with the hammer anymore. Will most likely always had it and he had
only hit the solid ground once. Mike wanted something, but knew if he asked for it then it would
all be for nothing.

"I really wanted to see you too by the way," Will looked petrified, "I always will."

"Want to see me?" Mike asked shakily, feeling like he couldn't breathe. Will's eyes darted to his
lips for a split moment, light growing around him like a spotlight.

"Yes."

The second crack had been made, the ground shaking beneath them.

Mike wanted it to fall.

 Chapter 41
Chapter Notes

Love Like Ghosts- Lord Huron

Regret was a constant ticker in Will's mind. During his few years alive, Will always felt as if he
was impending on some doom. Now he was aware a lot of the tragedies that struck were due to his
own terrible choices. It was a bittersweet piece of knowledge. While he was attempting to get
better at forgiving himself, that timer in the back of his head could never fully crack until he did it
with his own two hands.

That thought was more terrifying than he could admit.

Will had millions of things bouncing around in his head, but simultaneously nothing was
happening at the same time. He went from one issue to the other and never found a solution for
anything, usually digging himself deeper into a hole of stress each time. It was exhausting and he
hadn't even lifted a finger.

He tried not to think about his dad and the permanent damage that had been down to him, that was
something Will didn't trust himself with. Not yet. Whenever he stood in the kitchen or walked into
his room the memories loomed over him like a nightmare, keeping him from ever fully relaxing.
At times he'd be fine, almost proud of himself for not wanting to explode, and then he'd smell it.
The murderous scent of alcohol. He couldn't cover his nose to hide. It was like it had been stapled
into his nerves, a reminder that running away wasn't an option.

Blood always accompanied it now, and Will squeezed his eyes shut as if that would make it all go
away. He didn't remember much of that day, but the crimson red left more than one scar on him.
At times Will thought about what he might have looked like from an outside perspective, and then
his thoughts snapped to Mike Wheeler.

The only person who had seen him.

Guilt was drowning him. Will was terrified of the image, he could recall parts of that day and Mike
was one of them. While everything else lived in a blur, the horrified boy's face was much too clear.
Will had broken something in Mike that day, something he could never forgive himself for.
Mike thought he was hiding it well, but Will could see the haunted daze in his eyes, the way he
struggled to look at Will sometimes. It made his heart ache, a fear hitting him that he had
completely ruined someone. Someone that meant everything.

He wanted to change it, to fix the pain he'd caused Mike, but at times keeping his distance seemed
like the only gift he could give.

Will let out a sigh, staring at his cracked open door. He never fully closed it during the day,
deciding it was nice not to feel locked away. In a wave of motivation, Will had decided studying
before school would do him some good. Nothing had gotten done and he had exhausted himself
before the day could even start.

"Are you ready?" Jane asked, peaking her head into his room.

"Yeah."

Will shoved the papers into his book bag, glancing out his window once more. The sun was hidden
behind storm clouds. That morning Mike had snuck right back out, though it left Will on edge for
the rest of the morning. Mike hadn't called him or made any sort of contact since. Will just prayed
the boy hadn't been involved in a horrible accident.

"Mom, we're going," Will said, about to take a step out into the cold until they were both pulled
back into a hug.

"Be careful driving, please."

Will kissed her cheek, "I will."

"I thought they were gonna cancel today," Jane grumbled.

He took out his keys, "they never cancel."

"Alright, if you don't plan on coming right after school please let me know, okay? I love you."
"Love you too, mom." They spoke at the same time, and Will almost cried as they stepped out into
the horrendous weather.

"This is a form of torture," Jane said, holding her coat close as they got into the car.

Will's hands almost froze off as he touched the wheel, "turn the heat up."

"You should have warmed it up before we got out here."

"I'm not wasting gas."

Jane didn't respond to that and Will kept his eyes focused on the road. The ice had mostly melted,
but he didn't trust his luck on not spinning out on a loose piece.

"So, what time did Mike leave?"

Will almost drove into a tree.

"What are you talking about?"

She sighed, "if you're trying to sneak someone into the house Michael Wheeler is the worst person
to pick. He's like a walking megaphone."

Will's cheeks flushed, "I didn't sneak him in, he just showed up last night. What was I supposed to
do? Send him back into the freezing rain?"

"I didn't say that, I just...what were you talking about?"

He shrugged, "nothing."
"Oh come on, so he came to our house in the middle of the night to say nothing?"

"Jane I don't want to talk about it--"

She cut him off, "I'm not saying you have to, I'm just giving you an opening to confide in me. I
mean, I know you guys have been not great recently, and it's good that you talked ya know."

Will pressed his lips together, allowing her words to sink in. He danced from the topic of Mike
around her, knowing the subject was touchy. It seemed that everyone thought he was less
observant than he was. He noticed her longing stares and it pulled at his heart strings every time.
That guilt didn't seem to be leaving anytime soon.

"Do you still like him?" He asked, voice drifting above a whisper.

"Will, it doesn't matter--"

"So you do."

Jane let out a long breath, "I had a crush on him for years, Will, it's not going to just go away. I'll
get over it thought, okay? I mean, even if you didn't exist that wouldn't change anything. He's not
interested in me or any other girl in school. I'm not a baby I can deal with that, and honestly he's
barely spoken to me since homecoming so even if he did like me he'd be a shit boyfriend
anyways."

"He hasn't talked to you?" Will asked, pulling into the school parking lot.

"Not really, he's been pretty closed off since all of that...so I'm glad he came over last night, since I
didn't hear any screaming I'm assuming you two didn't fight?" She said, sending him a smile.

"We didn't, no." Will cleared his throat, "Jane, I'm so sorry."

"For what? Honestly, seeing Mike with you makes him instantly less appealing, so maybe if you
get your head out of your ass you'll actually help me out."
Will pinched his brows together, "what are you talking about?"

"You're hopeless sometimes, Mike literally adores you," she said, stepping out of the car.

"Wait hey stop, did he tell you that?" Will scrambled out, almost slipping as he bounced up next to
her.

"Oh my god, are you blind or something? Did you lose all five senses?"

"What do you mean--"

"Will, if I had the strength and ability to strangle you I would do it." Jane nudged their arms
together, "he literally drove in the freezing rain last night to come see you and you're asking if he
likes you? If someone even looked at me the way he looks at you I'd probably marry them."

"We're just friends, Jane." Will knew he looked bright red and was just happy he could blame it on
the cold. Though he doubted she'd believe that.

"That's fine, you did mess up pretty bad."

"Jane."

She shrugged innocently, "what? You did, and he's an ass too we know that. All I'm saying is that
you don't have to just be friends. You talked right?"

"I think."

"What do you mean 'you think?' it's a yes or no question."

Will folded in on himself, trying not to hit anyone as they walked through the halls, "yes, but it was
kind of confusing."
"What did he do? Come over and recite some poem to you?"

That was more likely than she seemed to think, "that actually might have been easier."

"You know, I have this feeling that he was very clear and you're just an idiot." They stopped at her
locker, and Jane threw it open, almost hitting him in the face.

"Thanks," he muttered.

"I mean, he literally told you that you were the person that made him realize he was--" Her eyes
widened and she threw a hand over her mouth.

Will felt his lips part, shock coursing through him, "you did not fucking do that."

"I'm sorry! Okay I'm sorry, but I was bored and couldn't sleep--"

"Oh my god," he groaned, "how much did you hear?"

"Tell me about your dead dog, baby."

Will covered his face, listening as she laughed at the phrase, "I hate you, I hate you so much. That
was private."

"I promise I didn't hear all of it, but come on Will, he was flirting with you-- you know, honestly
your analogy was pretty good, who was supposed to be the dead dog? Were you calling him a dead
dog, or like, the other stuff?"

"I'm walking away."

"No wait! I'm sorry."

Will slumped against the locker next to hers, "I can't believe you did that, what if we were talking
about something more sensitive?"

"Our rooms are right next to each other, and I tried not to listen, but it was really sweet and I've
never heard him not sound like a blow horn--"

"Who sounds like a blow horn?" A familiar voice rang behind them.

"Mike," Jane said with a smirk.

"Well yeah no shit." Max stood next to him, obvious amusement already on her face.

"Hey, have you talked to him this morning?" Will asked, his anxiety spiking again.

Max shook her head, "no, why?"

He bit at his lip, "I just want to make sure he got home safe."

"Well he texted me last night, he might have just slept in--"

Jane cut her off, "no, he was at our house last night, left this morning."

"Oh my god, would you shut up," Will cursed under his breath, sending the laughing girl a glare.

"Wait, he was at your house last night? Oh my god, that dipshit drove in freezing rain didn't he?"

Will nodded reluctantly, "yes, but he stayed over and the roads were fine when he left."

"He's probably skipping."

"Well, why didn't he just call and tell me that?" Will muttered to himself, fidgeting with his phone.

"You could call him, you know." Max hit their shoulders together, "just a crazy thought."

His brows squeezed, "oh."

"A phone works both ways."

"Yeah but..." he trailed off, biting at his lip, "I don't know, I don't think he'd want me to call him."

"Oh my god...you really are the most dense person I've ever met." Max's face glowed with
bewilderment.

Will flushed, "what are you talking about?"

"I'll call him," she said abruptly. Will watched with focused eyes as the phone rang, though as each
one passed fears of what could have happened to Mike came to mind. As the call finally declined
he had convinced himself that Mike was dead in a ditch somewhere. "You try."

"What if he's hurt or something?"

Max shrugged, "just try him."

With an irritated sigh Will pressed on Mike's name, figuring he was wasting his time since there
was little chance--

"Hello?"

It didn't even fully ring once.

"Oh um, hi are you okay?" Will said, avoiding the two pairs of eyes boring into his skull.

"Yeah I'm fine, are you okay? Did something happen? Your car started fine, right?"

His face was beet red, "yeah it's-- I just wanted to make sure you got home, you didn't call me or
anything..."

"I was supposed to call you?" Mike asked, his voice soft with confusion.

"I mean, I would have liked to make sure you were okay."

"I'm okay."

Will sighed, "well I know now— I mean, you're not hurt right? At all? you could have gotten into
an accident."

"I'm okay I promise, I didn't want to bother you."

He held the phone closer, feeling like he was in front of an audience, "you wouldn't have bothered
me, I would have liked to...I mean, I always like to..."

Max smacked his arm, her eyes wide with encouragement.

"Like to what?"

"I just...I don't um..." Will glanced at the two girls with worried eyes, his stomach pulled in knots.

"Get your head out of your ass," Max hissed at him, pushing the phone closer to his ear once again.

"Was that Max?"

Will bit the inside of his cheek, "yeah she's trying-- she's just-- well she's definitely somewhere
around here, but I was just saying that I uh..."

"Hey, is something wrong? You sound kind of sick."

"No!" His voice cracked, "no, no I'm fine, I uh...nevermind it really doesn't matter, sorry."

"Will--"

He hung up the phone, looking at the two girls with wide eyes.

"Oh my god..." Jane breathed out.

Max hit her head back against the locker, "that was the most pitiful thing I've ever seen. Did you
seriously just hang up on him?"

"I panicked, okay?" He groaned, his entire body now on fire with humiliation.

"Will, you have to call him back," Jane said.

He shook his head quickly, "no, no absolutely not."

"You have to!" Jane wrestled for his phone, "Max, tell him to call Mike back."

The redhead had her brows pinched, "no, you need to go see him."

"Right now? I have a science test today--"

"No not right now dipshit, after school."

Will pulled at the skin on his lip, "okay, what do I say?"

"I don't know, maybe just reassure him you didn't have a stroke."

"Did it sound like I was having a stroke?"

They both nodded, "yes."

The first bell rang and Will felt nervous adrenaline rushing through him. He wasn't great at
expressing himself, he had trained his mouth to always stay shut and say what was necessary. Now
that was coming back to haunt him as he continuously made a fool of himself.

"Okay, just go to his house after school and give him some chocolate or some shit," Max said as
they walked down the hall.

Will huffed, "no, he only likes white chocolate, it's that super expensive kind he takes from his
mom."

"You have to woo him."

"We're just friends, Jane," Will muttered, remembering how firmly Mike had said that, "I'm not
going to make this worse...I'll just go and apologize."

"Good luck."

Will was going to need that.

----------

The drive to Mike's house was much too short. He never realized how close the boy lived until it
was a forced confrontation. He parked on the street, noticing the white lights lining the home. It
was a complete contrast to the multi-colored one's Will's mom had hung up.

Will had been unable to focus the whole day, constantly thinking of the best way to apologize for
being a dunce. Maybe the white chocolate would have been a good idea.

Snowflakes stuck to his hair as he made it to the front door, hoping Mike was actually there. With
a long breath, he knocked, the sound echoing through the quiet neighborhood.

"Just be normal, just be--" The door opened and Will swung his head up, "hi."

Mike stood there with his brows shot up. He was wearing some band T-shirt with a thick cardigan.
It was defiantly a fitting look, he reminded Will of an English professor.

"Will?"

"Hi," he breathed out, "I just wanted to say sorry for earlier I didn't um-- really, I didn't mean to
hang up on you."

A soft smile spread of Mike's face, "you came over here to apologize?"

"Well, Max told me to."

Will felt his heart squeeze as Mike's face fall, the shimmering joy being wiped off within a few
seconds.

"Oh uh, well thanks--"

"But I wanted to see you too," he rushed out, forcing himself not to lose the confidence, "I really
wanted to see you."

Mike stared at him with a look of wonder and Will found his cheeks aflame from the attention. He
rolled his lips together, the cold biting at them as they stood there. Mike's cheeks were pulling up
into a reluctant grin, it was a look Will hadn't seen before, but now he would do anything to keep it
there forever.

"Really?"

"Of course," he said, "I um, I was worried about you."

"I-- oh shit, come inside it's freezing," Mike snapped into motion and stepped away from the door.
Will fell in almost immediately, his fingers feeling like they were about to freeze off.

The inside decorations were just as bland, and Will raised a brow towards the white Christmas
tree.

"So, are you going for the minimalist thing?" Will pulled off his coat, noticing that the only
ornaments were silver bulbs.

"My mom wanted to try something new, she saw it in some shit hallmark commercial."

Will laughed, "it's not too bad."

"Don't lie."

"Fine, it's terrible. What's wrong with red and green?" He asked, turning to look at Mike.

"I'm just glad she didn't go with blue, that shit is blinding." Mike tapped his arm, "come on, I hate
being down here."

Will felt questions tipping on him, but he didn't say anything and allowed Mike to pull him up the
stairs. Just like it always was, the house was unsettlingly quiet, and it made his heart ache thinking
about Mike being there alone.

"You have a little tree," he said with endearment, walking over to Mike's desk and touching the
green object. It was fake, but Will noticed the pine air freshener hung in it.
"Put it up all on my own," Mike threw himself down on the bed, "does it look good?"

Will sat down on the rolling chair, "you have an artistic touch."

"Wow, coming from you that means a lot. It's like winning an Oscar."

He rolled his eyes, "why weren't you at school today?"

"Didn't feel like it."

"Is everything okay?" He pressed, trying to be delicate with his words. It was easy to tick Mike in
the wrong direction.

Mike stared at the ceiling, "yeah it's just...I don't know, it doesn't matter."

"You can tell me if you want," he said, keeping his eyes trained on Mike's form.

"it's dumb--"

"I want to hear about it, it's not dumb if it was enough to make us miss you all day."

Mike sat up, "you missed me?"

"Why else would I be here?"

"Max told you to," Mike muttered, nerves written on his face.

Will folded his hands together, that confidence still there, "I would have come anyway."
"Yeah?"

He grinned, "yeah."

Mike's tight stance fell, "something happened with my sister."

"Holly?"

"Yeah and it's not that big of a deal, she's ten and I doubt she'll remember and I'm being ridiculous
about it and I bet she already forgot--"

"Mike," Will said softly, cutting off the unstable rambling.

"Right, sorry. My mom asked me to make her something to eat when I got back this morning. It
was great for a little bit, she was just talking about school and what she wanted for Christmas. I
used to make her food all the time when we were younger. It was two eggs and toast with grape
jelly. When I gave it to her she just stared at it and seemed kind of upset," Mike swallowed, "she
didn't like it anymore, apparently eggs are disgusting because they come from animals and I just...I
don't know her anymore, I don't know anything about her and I feel like a piece of shit."

Will let the room go quiet, not wanting to rush into anything. Mike was avoiding eye contact, his
face pulled into a thin line. Slowly, Will stood from the desk chair and took a seat next to the curly-
headed boy.

"Mike, just because she doesn't like eggs anymore doesn't mean you don't know her--"

"But I don't, I don't know shit. My parents aren't that bad, and I don't want to say anything to them
about the whole mess. I mean, my dad's kind of a loser and barely knows we exist, but at least he
doesn't hit..." Mike trailed off, his voice becoming nothing but air.

"Hit you?" Will asked.

"Fuck, I'm so sorry," Mike shoved his face into his hands, "I'm so insensitive oh my god--"

"Mike it's fine. Also, saying 'at least my dad doesn't physically hurt me' doesn't really sound like a
great argument. Parents can do a lot of different damage." Will felt his pinky twitch towards Mike's
hand, but quickly brought it back down.

"I've got nothing to complain about."

"Well your Christmas lights are really ugly, I think that's something to complain about."

Mike snorted, "I should just tear them down while she's gone."

"But really, you're allowed to be upset without feeling guilty about it."

"You're one to talk."

Will smiled, "I can give advice I just can't take it."

"It's your special little gift, Byers." Mike's eyes suddenly widened, a spark growing, "wait look at
this."

Will watched as Mike stood up and turned off the lights, "what are you doing?"

"Lay down and look up."

Deciding not to question it, Will did as he was told. As he glanced up to the ceiling, it was covered
in tiny green stars. Wonder slipped onto his expression as he took in how purposefully they were
placed, the once bland ceiling looking like the night sky.

"Wow..." he whispered, feeling Mike lay down next to him, "is this what you did all day?"
"Well, it only took a few hours--"

"So yes."

Mike laughed, a beautiful sound that filled the room, "it's cool, right?"

"Yeah, beautiful." Will hadn't looked at the green lights since Mike laid down, his eyes trained on
the other boy.

"Maybe I'll stick on some red ones too."

Will's eyes traced the line's of Mike's face, "no, I think that would ruin it."

"It would look like a Star Wars battle in here..." Mike trailed off, finally turning his head, their eyes
locking together in the dim room.

Green spread out around them, the color holding a relieving air that Will found himself basking in.
It caught Mike perfectly, showing perfections Will was only just discovering.

"You look perfect in green," Will whispered.

Mike's eyes fluttered over his face, "so you're saying I'd be one of the good guys?"

"The best guy. You'd be Yoda."

"He gets no babes, I want to be Luke," Mike said, his smile loopy.

Will returned it, reaching up brush some of Mike's curls away, "and what babes are you trying to
get?"

"Oh you know, I'm really into space buns."

He snorted, pushing at Mike's shoulder, "you're such an ass."

"What? Come on it's funny, I know my material--"

"Leia is his sister, you're a perv."

Mike's mouth dropped open, "oh my god I fucking forgot about that, okay I take it back I want to
be Han."

"He is hotter." Will sent Mike a smirk, "fits you perfectly."

The other boy's face flushed, "shut up."

"Sorry, didn't mean to offend you, princess."

Mike looked taken out of his element, "well he...he's not a-- he's just married to a princess."

"Same thing," he said, not commenting on Mike explaining the obvious fact.

"It's totally not."

Silence fell between them as they looked back up. It was comfortable, and Will brushed his arm
against Mike's cardigan, absorbing the warmth it held. The green stars glowed, becoming brighter
with each second. Will glanced at Mike once more, light reflecting evenly over the both of them.

"I did miss you," he said, his voice losing any teasing edge. "I really miss you."

Mike locked their eyes together, "I miss you too. Maybe it's...we should start over."
"I'm Will," he said with a grin, holding up his hand for Mike to take.

"I'm Mike." They shook hands, and Will felt rings digging into his skin. He had missed the pieces
of metal and felt the pinching absence when Mike pulled back. "So tell me something about
yourself that no one else knows."

Will's heart spun, "I really like to draw pictures of butterflies, or just any kind of nature."

Mike's face split into a smile, his eyes squinting, "so Will, am I ever going to be able to see these
magnificent drawings?"

"Yes. I'll even make one for you."

"I'd like that very much," Mike's voice ghosted over him, it dripped with sparks of gold, "if you
need an idea my favorite color is--"

"Blue. I know."

Mike visibly swallowed, "yeah...yeah blue."

"Well then, I'll have to make you a blue butterfly."

They stared, and Will wished he could read minds in that moment. Maybe if he knew exactly what
to say and do things could finally work out in their favor. The green light beamed over them like a
halo, leaving softened questions in the air.

"I missed being your friend," Mike said.

Will's heart stirred, a crack forming, "yeah. Me too."

"So we have this gig on Friday, do you want to come?"

"Do you want me to come?" He asked.

Mike blinked, reeling in the question, "I uh...I mean yeah--"

"Then I'll be there."

Will almost regretted agreeing, because he knew the second he heard Mike sing again he'd fall in
love with the boy all over again. Starting over would never change a thing. The beginning would
lead him right back to that fateful night.

No matter how many do overs Will had, he would fall in love with Mike Wheeler every single
time.
 Chapter 42
Chapter Notes

Young and Beautiful (piano version)- Lana Del Ray

Wednesdays were better than Tuesdays, and that was an attempt to look at it through a positive
lens. In reality, both days were dreadful and deserved to be skipped. Will thought a lot about what
life would look like outside of school, found himself wondering if the days of the week held
meaning in the real world. His mom called most jobs time stealers. Unfortunately, only the rich and
famous had found their way around that binding clock.

Will had built his life around time, constantly feeling as if there was never enough of it. Never
enough for him. Stopwatches had engrained themselves into his everyday life, always twitching
somewhere in the background. Will hoped that someday he could find a hammer and beat the
never-ending road of clocks till they were nothing more than dusting pieces. He thought about
what that freedom might feel like and if he'd know what to do with it. From a logical standpoint,
Will knew he always had the power in his hands.

He'd be proud of himself when he shattered it, that's something he liked to promise himself. That
feeling of self fulfillment he's never had before would arise. Time wasn't going to wait for him
much longer, so Will lived with an orb of tension in his chest, waiting for the day that the ticking
finally went quiet.

Will couldn't run anymore, and maybe that was a good thing.

School was useless the week before winter break, every student and teacher had already checked
out, speeding through the days without a thought in the world. Will found himself going right along
with them, eyes drifting towards the windows more often than not. After going over to Mike's a
pressure had been lifted off of his shoulders. He had missed the boy, that friendship had changed
more in his life than he could truly comprehend.

Though, he figured it was because a friendship was far from what he wanted or what they had. At
first Mike had just been Mike, a guy that Will found himself being free around for the first time.
He remembered the day he finally realized what that meant. As the guilt melted away with
rekindling, Will was glowing inside, remembering how entrancing it had been falling for Mike. It
was like a fairytale he never thought he'd get.
Will was making his way down the hall, he'd spent an hour in the library after school trying to
study. It hadn't done him any good, his mind not in the right place to focus. Snow was dripping
onto the ground outside and each flake looked miraculously different, making him want to reach
out and catch every one of them.

As he got closer towards the doors, the sound of a piano drifted towards him. Will stopped
moving, leaning into the elegant noise. It was like a some kind of hypnosis he's only felt once
before.

The door was cracked open, and once he got closer it felt like home. Will vaguely know the song
and as his eyes caught onto a blue ring, his heart swelled. It was soft in a way Will hadn't heard
before. He had figured Mike knew how to play the piano, but they'd never had a conversation
about it. Now that he had the privilege of hearing it, Will knew it would become an addiction.

"Sounds good," he said, voice a whisper once Mike finished. He pushed the door farther open and
watched the other boy swiftly turn towards him, cheeks flaming red.

"Shit, hi, I wouldn't-- what are you doing here?" Mike asked.

Will closed the door and leaned back against it, "was just leaving the library, sorry I didn't mean to
bother you--"

"No, no you didn't."

He nodded and found his eyes moving around. Will had always liked the music room, it was lit by
lamps and fairy lights. There was a warmth there that felt comfortable, a contrast to the rest of the
school.

"So you're multi talented," he finally said, gaze drifting back to Mike.

"I actually learned how to play piano first." Mike straddled the bench, "it was easier to get my
hands on."

"Why?"
"My mom thought they looked pretty as house décor so we used to have one in the living room."

Will chuckled in amusement, "I take it that went out of style?"

"Yep. Sits in the garage now." Mike sent him a smile, "come here."

"What?"

"Just come here."

Instead of continuing to question it, Will walked forward and carefully sat himself down next to
Mike. The bench wasn't big enough for them to have a comfortable distance, but Will couldn't find
any cell in him that cared.

Will took a moment situating himself, pulling at the sleeves of his sweatshirt before plopping his
hands down. Mike let out a snort of amusement.

"What is it?"

"That was cute, but alright I need you to put your hands back up."

He found his face burning, a smile coming up without his permission. Not looking at Mike, he
raised his hands and gently rested them over the keys.

"Like this?"

Mike hummed, "perfect."

"Are you teaching me how to play?" Will asked, finally finding the confidence to look at the other
boy. Mike's face was close, each color in his eyes easy to make out.
"Yeah, then maybe you can join a band," Mike said softly, scooting close enough that Will's
shoulder was hitting his chest.

"Don't think I was made for the stage."

"You were made for the museums, gotta put you behind some glass with a security guard and
stuff."

Will shook his head, "shut up."

"Can't take a compliment now?"

"You're embarrassing me."

"And you're way too easy. Now come on, these lessons aren't free Byers."

Will laughed, "I didn't bring any money with me, can I pay with something else?"

"Oh and what would that be?" Mike asked with a grin.

He shrugged, "don't know yet, how long do I have to think about it?"

"Well, I can't let you leave here without payment, how will I know you didn't scam me?"

"Want me to make you one of those paper roses?"

Mike's face lit up, "you know how to do that?"

"Yeah."
"I require a bouquet of paper roses."

Will's face ached from the smile plastered on, "okay, I will make you a bouquet of paper roses.
Now teach me Mr. Wheeler."

"Do you know how to read music?"

"No."

Mike nodded, "well we're gonna have to start there, hands off the keys."

"Just tell me what to push I don't need to read anything," he whined as Mike pulled out a pile of
sheet music.

"Okay fine, where's the b flat?"

Will pressed his lips together, "what does it sound like?"

"You don't know."

He sighed and looked down, deciding to have his fun before he was forced to sit there and be
taught about notes. Will moved his right hand, finding five keys to make a little rainbow with. He
pushed his thumb down first, then his pointer finger.

Then he got to his middle finger and it flinched, moving without his control. Will listened as the
sound rang out, one that was wrong and ugly. Nothing like the music Mike had been making. His
excitement dropped within seconds, now being reminded that he didn't have the luxury of control
anymore.

Will swallowed tightly and balled his hand into a fist, pulling it to his chest in an attempt to hide.
He felt Mike staring but didn't dare look at him.

"Yeah, we should probably just...look I can just leave you alone you were busy anyway--"
Mike stood up, not uttering a word as he walked to the corner and picked up a short stool. Will
followed the other boy with his gaze, trying to piece together what he was thinking without asking.

The stool skidded against the ground, and Will straightened his posture as Mike sat right behind
him. He wished there was any sound in the room because it would have covered the screams of his
racing heart. Will tried to control his breathing as his back gently pressed against Mike's chest,
molding them together into one piece.

"Mike..." He breathed out, feeling the singer's right hand run down his own.

"Can I take this?" Mike tapped his closed fist. Will could only nod, hyper focused on the way
Mike's chest rose and fell, he found himself leaning back into it.

That string between them, the one Will had wanted to tie back together, wrapped around their
bodies. Its faded color began to darken, colors mixing together and resembling a forest in the fall.
Will could now see what they were trying to morph into it. A color solid and untouchable, one he
was starting to allow into his life.

Mike's hands were rested on top of his own, and Will almost wished he'd press harder. The rings
were different now, each one holding a lighter color. They seemed new and shined with perfection,
it was as if Mike had dipped his fingers into a fountain of gold. The metal sent chills through Will's
body, goosebumps rising individually as his heart yearned for something never forgotten.

"Is this okay?" Mike whispered, mouth inches from his ear.

Will bit at his bottom lip, "yes."

The feeling was foreign. Will allowed for his hands to completely relax as Mike guided him across
the keys. The sounds slowly turned from simple notes and into music. It was graceful and he
watched with a pair of hypnotized eyes. The control left and for once it wasn't terrifying. Mike was
pressed against him, guiding him through each step with such care that Will couldn't find that
bubble of stress inside his chest. It dissipated as the quiet room was filled with beauty.

It only took a few moments for the song to click in his mind and Will found his breath catching. He
was sent back in time, the music room melting away and suddenly he was on Mike's couch again.
It had been the first time his obsession with drawing Mike had came about. His features were
sharp, littered with a beauty that could be held outside of youth.

"All the ways I got to know your pretty face and electric soul..." Mike sang, his voice dancing just
above the silence. Will let out an audible puff of air, leaning into the sound as if it was the only
thing keeping him afloat.

The song ended with one final note, and Will didn't dare move. A spell had been dropped over his
head and he was at his knees, any ounce of power within him was sucked out and gifted into Mike's
hands, right back where it belonged. He turned his head, not getting far before Mike's darkened
eyes sucked him in.

Will slid his right hand up, it was now steady, no movement could be done without his permission.
His eyes didn't stray from Mike's, almost sure he wouldn't be able to look away even if he wanted
to.

His thumb slowly flittered under Mike's pinked lips. Will nearly felt his heart grow a new
extension as the boy cracked his mouth open, a trembling gasp of air spilling out. Will stopped all
movement, frozen as he watched Mike's eyes move around his face, seeming as if he was searching
for something.

Will wanted him to find his answers, desperate to give Mike everything he could possibly want.
With careful deliberation, he shifted his hand until it was cupping against Mike's heated cheek, the
other boy's brows pinching with a crushing meaning.

Their left hands were still connected as Will leaned forward. Mike's eyes fluttered shut, his lashes
tickling Will's cheeks as they went. It was a feeling he never wanted to forget, even if such a touch
could only live in his memories it would be enough.

It was then when something clicked. Mike's hand cupped his face and as the rings found their spot
on his cheeks, they indented right back into place. It was like they'd found their home. Will leaned
into it and felt that gutting fear inside of him finally slink away.

"I'm in love with you." His voice shook, but that tentativeness did nothing to hide the power behind
his words.

Mike froze, his once relaxed body tightening as his eyes opened. Will couldn't move, his heart
making quakes to try and rip itself out of his body. Mike pulled back slightly, and as his hand
dropped something in Will broke.

"I..." Mike choked out, eyes moving wildly over him. "Will I...don't..."

He found tears gathering in his eyes, "oh."

"Wait that wasn't-- I don't know if I'm ready for that..."

Will dropped his hand, "I'm gonna go."

"Will, Will just listen--"

He got off the bench, "what was your plan? Were you going to just let me kiss you and then tell me
you want to be friends again?"

Mike's face dropped, pain etched in, "you know that's not fair."

Something inside of him flipped. It seemed that he and Mike remembered two different things as
that song played between them.

He pressed his eyes closed, "I'm sorry, you're right."

"You're in love with me?" Mike asked, his tone cracking.

Will wiped the tears on his cheeks, "yeah, guess I was a little too late."

Silence fell between them and Will felt it's crushing foot stomp on him. He picked up his backpack,
knowing that spending a second longer in there would break him into nothing. Mike was staring at
the ground, an unreadable expression on his face.

"I'm sorry," Will said once more before he rushed out of the room, closing the door behind him.
It seemed that Will had a talent of missing the train and finally getting on when there was no where
left to go. There was no time left, the clocks now useless.

----------

Friday night came around faster than he would have liked. While everyone else seemed to hop
around with excitement, Will felt like he was drowning. He knew there was nothing left for him to
do, Mike now knew how he felt and it changed nothing. Will thought back to the night Mike had
said he loved him and Will's heart ached. He had lost Mike for nothing, but part of him knew that
the person Mike loved wasn't real.

Maybe Mike never loved him in the first place. Though, no matter the pity party he tried to throw
himself, that was hard to believe. Mike was difficult to read at times, but the one thing Will was
confident in was that Mike did love him. Just not in the way he wanted anymore.

"I'm so glad it's going to be inside," Jane said, wandering into his room while she pulled on a
sweater.

"Yeah."

"Everything okay?"

He looked up, "everything is fine."

"You sure? Because you've been acting weird since Wednesday--"

"I'm fine, Jane."

She pursed her lips together, "what did Mike do?"

"Mike didn't do anything."

"Really? Because it doesn't look--"

"I told him that I loved him," Will said, looking down at his hands, "and...and he didn't say it
back."

"Oh," Jane breathed out, "yeah that's not...great."

He let out a puff of air, "no it's not. It's fine, at least I told him."

"Is that all you said?"

"What?"

She sat down next to him, "I mean, you didn't give him a speech or anything?"

"That's corny."

"Maybe, but it usually works."

"I'm not going to push. He said he wanted to be friends and I-- well I can do that, if it's what he
wants."

Jane patted his shoulder, "you still wanna go?"

"I said I would, can't back out now."

"We can tell everyone you got sick."

Will stood up, smiling as he pulled Jane to her feet, "I'll be fine, it should be better than sitting at
home all night."

"Just try to have fun, okay?" Jane said as they walked to the car. It was weirdly warm for being so
late in December, though the snow stayed put, not threatening to melt.

The roads were lit up, mostly from the street lamps, but the Christmas lights did wonders as well.
As expected, it was difficult to find somewhere to park. An air of excitement buzzed from
everyone around, a sprout of joy that Will couldn't reciprocate. Jane hopped excitedly next to him
as they made their way inside.

It was a rather large space, and Will merely glanced towards the makeshift stage, not allowing his
eyes to linger for long.

"Hey guys!" Dustin said, walking up to them with that same air of happiness that matched
everyone else's.

"Are the others here?" Jane asked.

"Yeah. They're just about to go on I thought you'd be late."

Will folded his hands together, "how long have you been here?"

"Thirty minutes I think, Steve already started drinking."

After that he zoned out their conversation as commotion started at the front. It appeared that Dustin
was right, they were seconds away from missing the first song. Will found a sense of regret for not
driving slower, maybe it would have been easier to show up in the middle. Will didn't know if he
could handle it now. Being there and knowing he'd have to see Mike again was a punch in the gut.

"I'm gonna get something to drink," Jane said, "you okay?"

"Yeah I'm good, be careful."

She just nodded and followed after Dustin, leaving Will alone in the room. He kept his head bent
and found a place by the wall, cursing when he realized it was in perfect view of the stage. Will
didn't want to be upset, Mike had said he wanted to be friends, that should have been fine, but the
words burned and left his skin bleeding. He realized then Mike must have felt the way he did that
night at homecoming and sickening guilt hit him.

It must have been some kind of karma, and Will couldn't argue that it was much deserved. He
leaned against the wall, arms held close as he watched the others come out. His heart sped by just
seeing Mike, it was a curse he figured wouldn't be going anywhere.

Mike looked very similar to the night they'd first seen one another. He was a wearing a large
flannel that Will found himself wanting to sink in, black jeans accompanied by all his usual
jewelry. He had wanted to buy Mike a necklace, one that really brought out the colors in his eyes.
It never really felt appropriate, maybe once their friendship sunk in he could reconsider it.

"Hey everyone!" Robin asked, clapping along with the crowd, "we're super excited to play for you
guys, enjoy!"

It was short and sweet, Will knew they all hated doing introductions. Robin was always a good
sport about it. When she waved to him with a big smile, he realized any attempt at hiding from the
stage was in vein. Mike walked up to the front, guitar held, and Will looked down at the ground. It
felt childish, but he needed a moment to collect himself before deep-diving into the hell of an
evening awaiting him.

The first song came and went. Will felt like he was playing some sort of game, every time he
looked up Mike already had his eyes on him, he'd get flushed and turn his head away. Mike
seemed to hold a sense of confidence that made Will want to rip his face off in that moment. They
were supposed to be friends now, that's what Mike wanted, so he shouldn't be staring like that.

Will tired to rationalize it, but as the night went on it felt like he was being messed with. Once
again, maybe it was the karma finally coming around and snapping at him. Mike's eyes had always
been sharp, once they focused on their prey there wasn't anything to tear them away.

"Hey! I was looking for you," Jane walked up to him, finally having pushed through the crowd, "I
thought you would have been with Lucas."

"This is gonna be our last song, thanks everyone!" Robin said, but they paid it no mind.
"Uh yeah, sorry," He said. Speaking made him realize how worked up he truly was.

Jane's face fell, "hey, what's wrong?"

He closed his eyes, "look I think I'm just gonna go."

At first he could tell she wanted to question it, then she glanced to the stage. That seemed to answer
any confusion.

Jane sent him a tiny smile, "alright, can you text me when you get home?"

"Of course," he pressed a kiss to her head before turning around.

He didn't make it far before his feet glued themselves to the floor. It was like the room had frozen
in place, faces morphing into nothing but an entourage of colors. The song struck cords within him,
memories flooding into his brain and making it impossible to run away. Cheers rang out around
him, but they sounded far away. Will finally snapped out of it and swiftly spun around.

"And I'd give up forever to touch you 'cause I know that you feel me somehow." Will found Mike's
stare with ease, "you're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be and I don't want to go home right
now."

Mike's brows pinched together with an air of intimacy. Will's lips parted, a short breath slipping
out. That string between them weaved its way through the crowd, the green color finally taking
place. It was almost blinding, but Will tugged on it, almost sure that he saw Mike take a step
closer. Their eyes locked, any key that would relieve them now long gone.

"And I don't want the world to see me 'cause I don't think that they'd understand," Mike's voice
was like a drug, holding a vulnerability Will had never heard before. Though, he figured that was
possible because no one else had ever sung for him, "when everything's made to be broken. I just
want you to know who I am."

There was a pleading in Mike's eyes, a look of desperation as if he was begging Will to understand.
Will bit his bottom lip, tearing the skin off as everyone else in the room slowly disappeared.
"And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming, or the moment of truth in your lies."

Will let felt his shoulders jump, an amused laugh threatening to slip out. He watched Mike,
millions of questions dancing on his tongue. It felt as if so much had changed while still nothing at
all. It was agonizing.

"When everything feels like the movies yeah, you bleed just to know, you're alive." Mike's voice
shook, and while he was sure no one else noticed, Will latched onto it.

The room felt suffocating after that, and Will knew he couldn't completely leave, that would now
feel cruel, but he needed to breathe. Pushing his way through the crowd, Mike's voice followed
right after him. It was almost as if it was growing louder, cutting into him with a sharpened blade.

Will found the back door and threw it open, grateful to see he was the only one out there. Though,
that shouldn't have been shocking since snow was still trickling from the sky. There were a few
lanterns lit and one long bench. Will uncaringly wiped some of the snow off and sat down, finally
sucking in a full breath.

There was a possibility that Mike was teasing him, he hadn't completely ruled that out yet, but it
felt unlikely.

He held his arms close, the cold air now becoming apparent. Will let out a long sigh and pressed
his face into his hands, legs shaking as he tried to keep in some warmth.

"So fucking stupid--"

A door clicked shut.

"What are you doing out here?"

Will lifted his head, looking over as Mike walked towards him, seeming slightly out of breathe.

"I just needed a minute," he said, reluctantly standing up as the other boy came closer. "What are
you doing? I mean, you made it pretty clear that we're over, and that's fine I get it, but then you go
and do that? Am I just reading too much into this? Because if I am just tell--"

"No." Mike said firmly, visibly swallowing, "no you're not I just thought...I don't know, that it
would be the best way to get you to listen to me."

"I would have listened to if you just talked to me."

Mike folded his arms, "you always jump to conclusions--"

"I do not--"

"You're doing it right now," Mike snapped.

Will let out a short sigh, "that wasn't jumping to conclusions I was just defending myself."

"Thanks for the lesson," Mike grumbled.

A short silence moved between them, that tension that hadn't left for weeks almost suffocating.
Snowflakes were collecting in Mike's hair, each one falling without a sound.

"What do you want from me?" He whispered, "I can't read your mind, I don't understand, I told you
how I felt--"

"No you didn't."

He felt at a loss, "what are you talking about? I did, I said it two days ago, Mike."

"No, you said that you're in love with me." Mike looked at him with determination, "why?"

"Why what?"
"Why are you in love with me? I want to know, if you're in love with me then tell me why."

Will felt the realization sink in and he nodded. Mike looked timid, almost as if he was fearful there
wasn't an answer to be given.

"You are my best friend, and I figured that out two weeks after you helped me with my car. I think
I realized I was in love with you when I jumped out of that window and you got really mad at me
and then made me recite that Shakespeare story with you," Will licked his bottom lip, "I love when
you do that actually, and I love it when you read books out loud. The first time it happened I
figured out you were trying to do it under your breath, but you talk too loud for that. I never told
you because I loved listening to it, I love your voice."

Mike had tears gleaming in his eyes, a look of pure shock glowing on his face. Will's palms were
sweating with nerves, but he knew it was important to keep going.

"I um," he pressed his eyes shut with embarrassment, "I have an entire notebook that's just pictures
I drew of you, none of them are very good, but I keep every single one. When I got...hurt, you were
the only one I actually wanted to see, and when you picked up I fell in love with you a little more.
That time you said you hated me I thought I was going to die b-because I couldn't imagine
anything worse than that. Even with everything else going on nothing hurt more than hearing that."

"Will..." Mike said, voice guilty.

He shook his head, "I fell in love with you a long time ago, and I should have told you. You mean
everything to me, and I'm not going to stop loving you no matter what you say because I don't think
I can." With a breath of confidence he stepped forward, "I want you. I want to love you and I want
to be with you, I want everything with you. I want to be able to tell you how much I love you
because you're my person. I want--"

Will's words were taken from him as Mike's hand cupped the sides of his face, his head bending
back as their lips collided together. He let out a gasp into the other boy's mouth, sparks of shock
and pure adoration rushed through him as Mike kissed him. He tugged on their string and Mike
stepped closer. Even if it wasn't truly there, Will knew he wasn't imagining it.

"I love you," Mike said against his lips, "I love you so much."
Gliding his hands up Mike's own, it felt odd practically holding his own face, but it gave him the
freedom to pull the other boy tighter to him. Those rings dug into his skin, the sharpness causing a
giddiness to surf through him. He tugged Mike back, kissing him until their lips molded together.
Kissing him until Mike could feel the want he held. Kissing him until there was nothing else in the
world to think about.

Will twisted his head, causing their noses to bump together. He wanted to be closer, to keep the
moment locked in place for as long as he could. Mike's lips were familiar, tasting of cherry
chapstick with a hint of smoke, but there was something new as well. Understanding swelled
between them, the past finally drifting away and turning into nothing but fog. Mike's left hand
dragged down until it was pressed against Will's chest, right to his heart.

"I'm here," he whispered, pecking Mike's lips, "I'm right here."

Mike pressed their foreheads together, "I'm not going to lose you again."

"You won't." He brushed a thumb under Mike's eye, "I love you."

"I love you too." Mike kissed his cheek.

"Thanks for singing to me."

"You liked it?" Mike asked, shifting their position and wrapping his arms around Will's waist, "it
was all my idea."

"Yeah? You wanted to serenade me?"

"Mhm, you always look pretty when you're surprised."

Will laughed, "well thanks, maybe I'll learn to like surprise parties."

"Oh I'll throw you so many surprise parties, baby."

He let Mike rock him back and forth, "you're ridiculous."

"Isn't your butt wet from sitting on that bench?"

Will pulled away from the hug and turned around, "I don't know, is it?"

"Oh yeah that's bad."

"Does it look like I peed myself?"

Mike pulled off his jacket and wrapped it around Will's waist, "definitely does, that better?"

"Yeah." Will spun back, not being able to keep the smile off his face, "I love you."

"I love you too." Mike held out his hand, "wanna go?"

"Yes, please."

Their hands locked together, and as Will peeked behind him he saw the rows of shattered clocks,
now too broken to chase after him. Maybe someday he could be completely free, as he glanced at
Mike that possibility didn't feel out of reach.
 Chapter 43

Music had been a pathway in his life. He used to sit in the background and allow it to corrupt every
inch of his mind. Stories were built upon sounds and words that could mean anything as well as
nothing. Mike knew that when he spoke things came out wrong and it could turn the world against
him in seconds. Singing gave him a timer, he only had two minutes to get it all out there and then it
was over. There was power behind something that couldn't last.

There was truth.

Mike believed that some people were the embodiment of music, that they held a soul so precious
and filled with unattainable beauty that they could only be described as a song. It was hard to find
them, near impossible if you asked him only a year ago.

Will had changed his mind the second he saw him. Looking at Will remembered Mike of music,
that unspoken or riddled pain lyrics held wove themselves into his being. It was easy to fall in love
with Will and excruciating to stay. For awhile Mike wanted to stop loving him, to be released from
the chains that held him. Then he realized maybe it was a gift. It didn't matter that he couldn't
understand himself and was petrified of what the feelings did to him, Will wasn't something to be
ashamed of.

Loving him was a choice, Mike knew that now, and he feared that he was in a dream. In dreams it
was easy to create the narrative that Will chose to love him back, but in reality it felt surreal.

Then he saw it. Heard it. For the first time he understood. Will had eyes with depth, they were
laced with years of unspoken words or pain. He was a puzzle with missing pieces. That's what
Mike used to believe until he found those pieces right in front of him, thrusted out in the open.
They had never been hidden in the first place, Mike was just looking in the wrong spots.

Will loved him, and Mike ripped his heart back open and decided to trust it. Trust Will.

It was Thursday evening, three days until Christmas. Mike wouldn't say he was excited for the
holiday, but the joy it brought the people around him was enough to heighten his mood. That and
something else Mike couldn't stop smiling about.

Snow was falling, though it was light enough to keep the roads safe. His parents were out
Christmas shopping, his mom promising it would be special for them. Mike couldn't care about
himself, but he wanted Holly to have fond memories, ones that weren't tarnished like his own.

Mike was driving down the road, now being overly careful after he had almost gotten into a car
accident the other day. Technically speaking it wasn't his fault, Max had asked him to go get a gift
for Lucas with her and things had gotten out of hand. They would go back and forth with
accusations on who had caused near catastrophe, but in the end both agreed to never speak of it
again.

The Byers' house was his favorite. Mike decided that months ago, but now it felt even more
special. Will was inside of it, so of course it was precious, but the warmth it held made Mike feel
like the child he never got to be. A wonderland of unfelt memories.

He held his coat close and knocked on the door, not having to wait for more than a second before it
was flying open.

"Hey, sweetheart!" Joyce said with a wide smile, pulling him into a tight hug, "how are you?"

"I'm good Miss Byers." He squeezed her back. Mike loved his mother but she'd never been much
of a hugger, always being stiff under his arms. The Byers family was nothing like his, their hugs
were perfect, crafted with a love most people couldn't imagine.

"Come in, did you drive alright? How are the roads?" She asked, helping to pull off his coat.

He laughed, "they're not bad, no ice or anything."

"Good, and your lights were on? You were careful--"

"Mom, stop grilling him."

Mike felt his heart spin when Will's voice filtered in. He turned, a smile pinching onto his face.
Will was leaning against the wall, obviously having walked out of his room.

"Alright, alright," she said, holding her hands up in mock surrender. "I am going to be out until ten
or eleven. Jane is with Chrissy but I told her to call you if she wants picked up-- oh! And I left
some cookies in the freezer you can heat those up if you want any, if something happens you call
me, make sure the doors are locked. Don't break anything--"

"We're not going to break anything, everything his fine," Will said, his face tinted pink.

"Okay I trust you, but it's a gentle reminder," she pulled her coat on, and walked over to kiss Will's
cheek first before repeating the action for him, "I love you both, be safe."

"Love you too," they said at the same time, waving as she left. There was a moment of silence
between them, Mike glanced to Will before going over to the door and twisting the lock.

Will snorted out a laugh, "I'll let her know you stayed on top of it."

"You better, if I find out you took credit for it I'll return your Christmas present." Mike finally
allowed gravity to pull him towards Will, "and you would not want that."

"What is it?" Will asked, nose scrunching up as he smiled.

"I can't tell you, it'll ruin the magic."

Will was looking up at him, a spark growing in his eyes. Mike wanted to drown in it, which wasn't
a new feeling, but now it wasn't something he had to hide. It was new, everything felt delicate and
untouchable, but Mike was okay with it. He had exactly what he wanted. Will would be enough, he
always had been.

"Did you get me a puppy?"

Mike raised a brow, "Your mom would kill me."

"Everyone likes puppies she'd get used to it," Will said, gently taking his wrist and guiding him
into the living room. "So what you're trying to say is that you got me a kitten?"

"I did not get you an animal," Mike said, plopping down onto the couch, Will sitting down next to
him.

"So a lizard--"

"Stop it, you're not even close," he laughed, fighting the urge to pull Will into his side. They hadn't
been very touchy, not after the dreadful movie night they had months ago. Mike now felt off about
initiating anything. He knew it would be better to talk about it, but the idea of making Will guilty
over it kept his mouth shut.

"A bird."

"No--"

"Why?"

"Do you want a bird in your house?" Mike asked, "because I'll get you a parrot and we can see how
long that lasts."

Will finally leaned his back against the couch, "I could handle a parrot."

"It would keep you up all night."

"I'm already up all night so then we can just be awake together."

Mike strained his brows together, "you're not sleeping?"

"Well I-- no I am, I was kidding." Will looked forward, giving Mike all the information he needed.

"What's going on?" He asked, keeping his voice soft.

Will shrugged, "nothing, I just think too much and then I freak myself out."
"You need to sleep."

"Have you been sleeping?"

Mike pressed his lips into a line, "this isn't about me--"

"That's what I thought." Will finally looked back towards him, "I'm okay, Mike."

"If something is wrong you can tell me," he said, once again squeezing his hand into a fist so that it
didn't go anywhere.

"I know, but right now there's nothing to tell." Will paused, "you can talk to me too by the way."

"I know."

The boy smiled, "do you wanna watch a movie?"

"What do you have in mind?"

Will shrugged, "don't know, my mom keeps telling me to watch Dirty Dancing."

He dropped his mouth open, "you haven't seen that movie?"

"No, is it good?"

Mike leaned over and grabbed the remote, "Will, you're a disgrace."

"I don't like movies with real people it's not visually appealing."
"I know you don't like them, but this is a classic." He knew how to navigate the TV, having done it
many times before. Will had never been the best at picking movies, "you'll like it I promise."

It was easy to find, Joyce having saved it in a folder. At least one person in their family had taste.

The only light in the room came from Christmas decorations, the tree casting a warmth over them.
Mike tried to keep his eyes centered on the screen, but the magnet in them caused Will to flood into
view.

There was an awkward space between them, not one wide enough where it showed they were
purposefully sitting apart, but they weren't close enough to make it comfortable. Mike didn't dare
move, the memory of Will squeezing out of his embrace never far gone. He knew the fear was
irrational, now understanding why Will had tried to hide in the first place, it hadn't been to hurt
him. Yet, Mike still couldn't get body to budge.

"What do you think she does with her hair?" Will asked when they were a few minutes in.

"Mhm?" Mike hummed out, not hiding the fact that he was entranced.

Will looked at him, "her hair is...nice."

His eyes wondered, "uh yeah, yeah she's got good hair."

"Baby," Mike's heart stopped, the name causing his skin to boil in the most perfect way, "that's a
weird nickname."

The bucket of ice that dropped sent Mike into an early grave.

"Yep. Totally weird."

Will seemed engaged in the movie, and while Mike should have been happy about it, he now
regretted turning it on. He didn't bother to keep his eyes forward, now trying to catch every
expression Will might make. It was like he was in a state of hypnosis, unable to focus on anything
but the beauty that Will held so effortlessly.

"Head up. Lock your frame, lock it. Look spaghetti arms. This is my dance space, this is your
dance space. I don't go into yours, you don't go into mine, you've gotta hold the frame."

"You've got spaghetti arms," Will muttered.

"Thanks, you always know just what to say." Mike cleared his throat, face heating up as Will
turned and caught his staring.

I've been meaning to tell you I've got this feelin' that won't subside

His heart was racing, pounding so loudly he was sure it was trying to drown out any other sound in
the room. He could feel Will's eyes on him, studying him in a way Mike used to hide from.

I look at you and I fantasize, you're mine tonight

A hand ghosted down his arm. Mike felt his breath catch, the room suddenly becoming too warm.
He turned his head, catching Will's eye within seconds. The green in them was glowing, casting a
ray of enchantment over him. He didn't say a word, watching as Will scooted closer. It was like the
other boy had finally dug in and read his mind, giving Mike exactly what he craved.

Now I've got you in my sights

"You could have asked me."

"What?" He breathed out.

Will's hand moved up, cupping the side of Mike's neck, "to come closer."

He flushed, "I didn't want to bother you..."

"You're never bothering me," Will whispered.

With these hungry eyes, one look at you and I can't disguise

His gaze fluttered down to Will's lips, "can I..."

"Can you kiss me, baby?"

Mike's chest sparked once again. The name spilled past Will's lips with such ease, it felt like a
powerful sugar rush.

He snapped his eyes back up, "did you notice?"

"I'm not stupid," Will said with a smile.

Mike wrapped an arm around the boy's waist, pulling him closer. Confidence filtered through his
veins and he gently gripped Will's chin, their lips ghosting inches from each other.

"No...no you're not." The words engrained themselves against Will's mouth as Mike leaned
forward, finally capturing what he had been silently begging for.

I've got hungry eyes I feel the magic between you and I

Will's hand slipped up onto his cheek, but Mike paid that no mind. Kissing Will was addictive,
everything about it was right. His mind finally shut off, leaving him to absorb the moment. He
tugged the boy closer, turning his head slightly so they could fit more comfortably together. Will
let out a sigh, seeming just as content. Their was an ease in the way they moved, It felt like they
had practiced the action until their lips bled. They clicked into place with a perfection Mike
recently found existed.

"I want to hold you so hear me out," Mike sang against Will's lips, "I want to show you what loves
all about."
Will laughed and the sound was intoxicating, Mike gave him another peck. The final crack had
been made between them. A puddle of joy released into the air. He tugged Will into his lap and
wrapped him in a tight hug.

"Darling. Tonight now I've got you in my sights," Mike rocked them back and forth, taking his
hands and digging them into Will's sides. The one thing he'd kept locked in his memory was how
ticklish the boy was.

"No, Mike!" He whined, the laughter covering most of his words.

Mike kissed his ear, "with these hungry eyes one look at you and I can't disguise. You like that?
Want me to keep going?"

Will let out a snort, still trying to wiggle out of his arms, "stop it! I can't breathe."

"Oh what was that? A yes?"

"Mike!"

"I need you to see, this love was meant to be." Mike stopped tickling him, but moved his hands up
to cup Will's cheeks. They were flushed, but his heart soared when he saw the joy and unstopping
laughter spilling from his boyfriend. "I've got hungry eyes one look at you and I can't disguise."

"I love you," Will said.

Mike melted, "I love you too."

"This is a good movie."

He brushed some hair out of Will's face, "yeah? Are you changing your tune about live action
movies?"
"I don't know, I think I just have a crush on Patrick Swayze."

Mike shook his head, "no you can't say that, I don't look anything like him and you're going to hurt
my feelings."

"What are you talking about? You're basically twins," Will said, smiling as he leaned down for a
kiss.

"I can hear you laughing, kissing me isn't going to fix that."

Will hummed, "maybe not, but it does get you to shut up."

"It doesn't, I can talk through this," Mike's voice was muffled, still allowing Will to leave pecks on
his lips, "see that? I can do both of my favorite activities at once."

"Inconvenient," Will said, pulling back and resting their foreheads together, "you're really pretty."

Mike flushed dark red, "really?"

"Of course, you're so beautiful." Will kissed the side of his head, "Patrick Swayze isn't my type
anyways."

"And what is your type?"

Will shrugged, "whatever you are."

"Oh wow, you really know how to make a guy swoon." Mike ran a hand through Will's hair, "I
miswell marry you on the spot before someone hears that sweet talking and snatches you up."

"Thank you, I've been working on it."

Mike let out a laugh, "oh yeah? Talk to your pillow?"

"Yeah, my pillow takes the compliments a lot better though."

"Alright I'm sorry, try again I'll take it better." He said, trying to act as if he wasn't turning to goo
inside the second Will reached out and started messing with his rings.

"I think your personality is tolerable."

Mike dramatically fanned himself, "oh my god, how have you been single for so long? At least let
me buy you dinner first, sweetheart. Jesus you're getting me hot."

"This is what happens when you have game," Will snickered, kissing the tip of his nose, "you're so
lucky I picked you."

He knew it was a joke, but Mike couldn't help the goofy smile on his face, "I know I am."

"You're cheesy."

"And I'm obsessed with you, so I can be as cheesy as I want."

Will's face visibly heated up, "I love you. A lot. I love you a lot."

"That was cute," Mike whispered, "I love you too."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

After that they didn't keep a distance, now pressed together as the movie continued to roll. Mike
wanted to thank any god that might be up their for making his dreams real. Will held him close,
and he waited to be woken up from the state of perfection. The time never came and with each
passing second he began to realize all the pain had been worth it. Will was there and safe in his
arms.

Mike had no plans on losing him ever again.

 Chapter 44
Chapter Notes

Who Wants to Live Forever- Queen

TW: mentions/conversations about abuse

"He was about four hours out of town..."

"No."

"Excuse me?" His dad asked, words slurring.

Will pressed his hand into a fist, "you walked back in here to fucking slum on our couch, don't act
like you ever did anything for me!"

"You don't know what it's like to be a parent!"

"We're still looking into the specifics, but by the time we found him..."

"I hate you, I h-hate you."

"Oh you hate me?" The man took a long drink, hand squeezing Will's right arm, "you fucking hate
me! You hate me, you piece of shit!"

"He's gone. I'm sorry, I'm sure this is not what any of you wanted. An autopsy is being done, but
we believe it was a drug overdose..."

"Dad..." he said, eyes still trained upwards. The man almost lost his step as he walked backwards,
"d-dad, dad what..."

"I'm sorry," His father shook his head, hurrying to grab his keys, "I'm so sorry."

"Dad!" Will croaked out, listening as the front door slammed shut; And he was alone, the house
finding its silence once again.
"By the time we found him he'd already been gone for weeks."

It was like some kind of sick game, Will's mind started making him feel stronger and more capable
of taking on challenges. Then when he was thrown into the shark tank any survival skills he gained
disappeared.

Police stations were worse than hospitals, Will decided that the second they stepped inside. That
morning everything had been fine, it was uneventful and slow, which wasn't uncommon for the
time after big holidays. Now he was here, ears dipping below water as the man that caused his
years of torment was gone.

No part of him existed on earth anymore, he left without a single goodbye. Left thinking that he'd
meet his son somewhere after death. Everyday Will had thought about what he'd say, about the
closure he was so desperate for. He was sure that, no matter what, someday he would get it.

That had been stripped away, his dad died thinking Will went right along with him.

"W-Was he..." his mother trailed off, her face pale, "was there anyone else with him?"

"Not from our knowledge, no. The house was pretty run down, we're assuming he snuck in," the
man said, a lack of empathy in his voice. Though, Will couldn't blame him. They weren't by any
means speaking about a good person.

"Alright um, is there something else you need from us?"

Will glanced towards Jane, finding that she was already looking at him. It all felt surreal.

"Well, you're the only family he had that's not deceased. Everything is pretty much up to you."

His mom nodded, "alright, I think we just need time."

"Of course." He paused, "I'm...I'm sorry for your loss."

That held more depth that Will wanted to think about.

"Thank you officer," she turned to them, "lets go."

Will felt himself being dragged out of the station, his mind feeling like a blur. Clouds casted over
the sky, setting a perfect mood for the day. His stomach was in knots, threatening to explode with
every step he took.

"You okay?" Jane whispered to him as they got in the car.

"He's just...he's dead?" Will asked, not being able to keep up. It all felt wrong, he wanted structure,
some kind of happy ending that would finally let him move on.

There was nothing. Helplessness sunk up in him, causing an invisible hand to wring around his
neck.

"Yeah baby, he's gone," his mom said, reaching back and squeezing his hand, "it's okay."

The car ride was silent, making his ears ring. Will kept his gaze towards the window, wondering if
his heartbeat was actually slowing down or if he was drifting from his body. It shouldn't have been
sad, and maybe that wasn't the emotion overtaking him. Yet, there was something, a feeling so
overcoming that he could barely get a thought out.

They'd been pulled out of school early, and Will could still recall the hopefulness he had.
Something was changing, and maybe that something would be in his favor.

It was naïve.

He walked to his room, not bothering to exchange any pleasantries before locking himself away.
Will listened as his door clicked shut, the sound bouncing around, not slowing until he slid himself
to the ground. Taking deep breaths didn't help, but he was desperate to center himself. It felt idiotic
to be upset, if anything he should be grateful.

Seventeen years. Will had been mentally and physically tormented for seventeen years by a man
who didn't even have the guts to say goodbye. He could never be the same person again, his hand
was torn apart and ugly, he couldn't step into the kitchen anymore without smelling beer. The idea
of touching a football made him sick, he thought he was a useless piece of nothing that no one
would ever love for seventeen years. Will would look at himself at times and not know who it was.

Then just like that, it was over in the most disturbing way possible. Will never got to say the
goodbye he needed to, he didn't get to win the game. After seventeen years of learning to hate
every part of himself Will was expected to get over it. There was nothing else to do.

"Fuck," he breathed out, "fuck, what the fuck..."

Will pressed his head between his knees, trying to force the nausea down. It felt like the room was
full, and if he lifted his eyes, there would be every version of himself sitting there. Will
remembered what he used to look like, a form that existed for a few measly years. His eyes had
been bright, holding a color that no longer existed, at times he saw shards and tried to push them
out, hoping to find the boy that got stolen from him.

Not long ago he came to realization that no matter how much changed or how happy he became,
the person he wanted back was gone. Dead right along with his father. Will didn't bother to cover
his mouth as a sob slipped out.

"I hate him, I hate him, I h-hate--" he choked, coughing as tears got stuck in his throat.

There was a knock, and Will didn't move as the door began to press into his back.

"Hey, let me in," Jane said, continuing to push, "you've gotta move."

Reluctantly, he scooted up. She slipped inside, crouching down and pulling him into a hug. Will
didn't fight it and sunk down against her side, tears blurring his vision.

"It's okay," she whispered, "he's gone now--"

"No, n-no he wasn't supposed to go like that," Will sucked in a breath, "it's not fair, he almost k-
killed me and left me there. I never got to show him that I was o-okay, that I lived, that I didn't--"
"Will, it doesn't matter what he thought, it doesn't matter--"

"It matters to me!" He blew up, voice cracking. Jane held him tighter, "he tormented me for years,
he t-told me I was worthless and beat me a-and ruined my fucking hand, h-he took everything away
from me. I never got to tell him that I made it or that he didn't get to kill me. I just have to live with
it for the rest of my life."

"I'm sorry," she whispered, running a hand through his hair.

Will's chest burned as the sobs continued, "he just got to d-die and now...he got to die and leave a-
and never has to pay for anything he did to me. He got out of it after turning me into some f-
fucking walking corpse and half the time I don't even recognize myself, h-he took me away
from...away from me and now he's dead. He's dead and I never got to show him that I didn't
fucking lose. I hate him."

"I hate him, too." Jane's tears dripped onto his shoulder, "I hope that he's miserable for all of
eternity."

He let out a watery laugh, "I wish I could just go back in time and fix it. I want to be who I was
before he..."

There was a silence that overtook them. Will leaned closer to his sister, allowing his eyes to fall
shut. She'd always been amazing at giving hugs, it was a gift he found himself jealous of. Jane
hugged like it was the first and last time she'd ever see a loved one. She knew how to cherish
things in a way most people couldn't comprehend.

"I like who you are now," she finally said, voice whispered.

Will bit his bottom lip to keep it from shaking, "I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to apologize for. I'm the one that should be sorry, you protected me and I
should have--"

He shook his head, "no, I wouldn't change that. I would go back and do the same thing every time."
"Then maybe you were always meant to be this Will."

"What?" He asked.

Jane shrugged, "I think you're the best brother. Jonathan left, mom wasn't always there. You never
left me, you've never left anyone. You are the best Will there could have been. I love this Will, we
all do and I don't care about the millions of other Will's out there. You're the right one."

He turned just enough to engulf her in a tighter hug, eyes squeezed shut. Jane returned the embrace,
both of them mingled together as they huddled on the floor. Will listened to her cry and didn't
bother hiding his own tears. It was a relief, the words fixed part of him in a way he couldn't quite
understand.

"I love you."

She kissed his head, "I love you, too."

Their was a pause in their conversation.

"I'm laying in your bed," Jane said, jumping to her feet.

"Hey no, don't--"

"Too late." She pulled a blanket over herself, sending him the same cheeky smile he used to see
when they were kids. Something nostalgic hit him, and Will couldn't help but allow the moment to
continue. He got up and laid next to her, yanking some of the blanket over himself.

"You don't get this one," he said, "it's new."

"Did you wash it?"

He pulled it to his chin, "Of course I washed it."

Will vaguely heard the front door opening.

"Is Will here?"

"And there he is," Jane muttered, a snort of amusement slipping out.

"You know, honey, I don't think now is the best time--"

"Is he okay? Is Jane okay? Can I see them?" Mike asked, his questions rushing together.

Jane wiped her eyes, "mom, just let him in!"

It only took a few seconds before Mike was standing in his room, looking at them with worried
eyes.

"What happened?"

"Our dad he..." Jane trailed off.

"He died."

Mike's brows shot up, "oh."

That seemed to be the best way to sum up the situation. Will watched the other boy fidget, not
bothering to speak.

"Are we...upset?"

"Yeah."
"Okay uh, I'm sorry for your loss--"

Jane let out a small laugh, "no not cause of that. He just-- well, he should have gone to jail. Paid for
his crimes and all of that."

"I take it you two aren't religious?" They both shook their heads. "Yeah me neither. I hope he's
miserable for eternity even if there is no hell."

"That's what I said," Jane added on happily.

Will watched Mike put his foot back, getting into a running position. He immediately pieced
together what his boyfriend had planned and widened his eyes.

"Mike no--" Before he could finish, a new body was flying onto the bed, causing it to creak under
the pressure.

"Give me some of the blanket," Mike yanked on it, causing Jane to lose her half as Will laid
smooshed in the middle.

"Hey give it back--"

"No, I just got here so I have a higher level of chill."

"Oh shut up--"

Will cut them off, "there's another blanket right there, just take that one."

"No then we're losing that air of intimacy, come on Will."

"Yeah Will," Jane added on, a bright smile on her face.

"Fine, fight over it then I'm comfortable."

After a beat of silence, both of them moved closer, now using him as a heater. Will couldn't find it
in himself to complain, it was impossible to. He had two of his favorite people right there and that
was a gift not given often enough.

"I think it's good that he's dead," Mike said, wrapping an arm around his waist, "now he can't hurt
anyone."

"They said he died alone." Will stared up at the ceiling, trying to ball his right hand into a fist.

Mike sighed, "that's the worst way to go."

"Why?" Jane asked.

"Being alone, it's sad. You live your entire live, have a family, go places, meet people, experience
things only to have nothing but yourself in the end. No one to be there and you don't know if they
would care. I mean it's crazy right? Like imagine everyone you've spoken to or loved or just
laughed with and then when you're dying it's just you. Everything reduced to a moment. I don't
think there's any worse punishment than that." Mike's words were muffled, as if the profound
thought was nothing more or less than ordinary.

"Some people like being alone," Will said, turning when he felt the other boy's stare on him. They
locked together, the brown in Mike's eyes swirled and created a picture of memories.

"No one wants to die alone though, that's completely different."

Jane sniffed, causing them both to look towards her, "do you think he was guilty when he died?"

“I’m sorry,” His father shook his head, hurrying to grab his keys, “I’m so sorry.”

"Maybe." Will glanced to his hand, "I hope so."

"Do you think there's a place people go? Like, you aren't a body," Mike said, his voice airy with
thought.

"What do you mean?" Jane asked.

"I mean that you aren't you, or your skin I guess. If you hopped out of your body and went into
someone else's you'd still be you. Like, If I suddenly shaved my head, got tattoo's all over me, and
tried to join the circus I'd still just be me. What you look like doesn't make you who you are, ya
know?"

Will couldn't help but smile, "so, even in this imaginary scenario, you can't be sure that you made
it into the circus?"

"I'm trying to be realistic, Will."

"Maybe he'll be rebirthed as a cow or something," Jane said, laughing at her own words, "or maybe
he's just stuck in a dark void, bouncing around and trying to find someone else to torment."

"Do you think he just...hated me? Like he saw something in me that wasn't worth loving?" Will
asked softly, a question that's been in his mind for ages finally slipping out.

"I think he saw someone that the entire world was going to love and couldn't handle his own
jealously." Mike said, threading their hands together, "it's like when you watch a movie and
the villain hates the hero, but everyone loves the hero because how could you not, right? So this
villain spends their whole life trying to hurt this character and make them miserable, but in the end
they always lose because the hero has friends, family...love. The villain always ends up with
nothing. A hero's journey. If someone wants to hate you they will find a way to do that no matter
what, it sucks but it's never your fault."

It was odd listening to Mike speak. The words sounded like a speech, but the way they were
delivered completely opposite to that. They weren't spoken with an air of specialty nor did Mike
look like he gave it much thought. It was comforting to listen to. Maybe if it was anyone else he
would have feared they were just saying anything to make him feel better. Not Mike though.

Never Mike.
"I still wish I could have shown him that I'm not...I don't know, that he didn't break me I guess."

"He knows," Mike paused, "and even if he doesn't, the people that matter know."

Jane bumped their shoulders together, "he's right."

"Sometimes I think about what it would be like if everyone was born with their fingers in the
opposite order," Mike said. Both he and Jane looked at him with confusion, "wow you guys look
the same right now. Are you sure you're not twins?"

It seemed that Mike's moment of genius had ended.

Will rolled his eyes, "oh my god."

"As fun as this has been, I'm going to check on mom." Jane pulled herself off the bed, "don't talk
about anymore death conspiracies without me."

She walked out of the room, closing the door and leaving them alone. Will didn't bother to move,
both of them now pressed towards the edge of the bed. Apparently Jane took up a lot more space
than he originally thought.

"Are you okay?" Mike asked, shifting to his side and propping himself up.

"I don't know." He pulled his hand out and ran it through the other boy's hair, "thanks for coming."

"I was worried about you. Both of you."

"I'm sorry."

Mike sent him a smile, "don't apologize."

"Can I ask you something?"

"Of course," Mike said, leaning down to kiss his head, "ask me anything."

"I don't want to make you upset--"

"Will, just ask it's okay."

He let out a long breath, "I don't remember what happened that day."

Mike's face dropped in seconds, "you don't remember?"

"Most of it is kind of blurry. I'm sorry we don't have to talk about it if you don't--"

"No, no it's fine I just..." Mike closed his eyes, "I mean, you lost a lot of blood. I freaked out but
you were...you were really calm, you told me that it was okay and you didn't want to scare me."

The TV started playing in the living room, casting a comfortable sound through the house. Mike's
face was pale, and Will couldn't help the guilt that hit him. That day wasn't one he could recall
easily, but the idea of letting Mike live with the memories alone was enough to push him. He
reached his right hand up, fighting against the disgust he had for it and cupped Mike's cheek,
running a thumb under the boy's eye.

Mike pressed into his touch, "you asked me what my favorite song was."

"What is it?" He asked, curiosity hitting him.

"Who Wants to Live Forever."

"That's a good one," Will said.

Mike leaned closer, "yeah?"

"Yeah...who wants to live forever..." his singing voice was barely there.

He didn't expect that sound that escaped Mike. It was mixed with a sob and a laugh, something so
gut-wrenching his chest began to ache.

"What is it?" He asked softly, eyes darting over the singer's face. A tear slipped from Mike's eye,
falling to Will's bottom lip. "Hey, hey what's wrong?"

Mike pressed their foreheads together, "and we can have forever..."

"You kind of have Freddie Mercury's hair--"

"Do you actually remember what happened? Are you just messing with me or something? D-Do
you..." Mike pulled back, staring down at him with creased brows.

"What?" He asked, shocked by the sudden change, "I wouldn't...why?"

Mike sighed and turned, leaving a gentle kiss on the scar covering his right hand. It was such a
delicate touch, lingering there as if Mike was trying to convince himself of something.

"I love you," Mike whispered, "god, I love you so much. I love you."

Will smiled, looking at Mike with adoration, "I love you, too."

"I don't know what I would have done if I lost you that day," he paused, "or if I lost you ever, you
are...you mean everything to me. I know I was an ass after it all happened, and I'm so sorry, I just
thought I watched you die and I couldn't stop thinking about it. I was so angry at myself and I
wanted to kill your dad. For a second I had to think about what it would be like if you died and I've
never been more terrified in my life."
Will darted his eyes between Mike's, mouth parted with shock. He ran a thumb under the other
boy's eye again, catching the dripping tears. It wasn't often that Mike just let his feelings spill out
without a lot of prompting.

"I'm not going anywhere. You saved me, I'm here," Will said softly, pulling Mike's lips down to his
own, allowing them to ghost together, "I'm alive. You make me feel alive."

The kiss was gentle, but it seemed to be enough to ease Mike's tense posture.

"I'll always save you, but I would appreciate a weapon of some kind. Maybe a sword or two
swords, I'll let you pick."

"Oh okay, thank you I'll look into that," Will said, pecking Mike's forehead, "I never gave you your
Christmas present."

Mike's face lit up, "can I see it now?"

"Mhm," he hummed, reluctantly getting off the bed and going over to his desk. Will felt the nerves
rise in him, but didn't allow them to deter his confidence. He grabbed the nicely folded piece of
paper and took a deep breath before turning back.

Mike was sitting up, his face bright with excitement. That alone was enough to lower Will's
worries.

"I'm sorry I know it's not great--"

The picture was taken out of his hand, being opened before he could finish his speech. Will
practically melted when Mike's face blew up with a smile, one so genuine that it almost sent him to
tears.

"This is beautiful..." Mike breathed out, "how did you know I like butterflies?"

Will sat down and poked Mike's ear, "your earrings. That one's yellow, but I thought it would be
nice to put some pink and blue in there too, this ones a crowned hairstreak because I thought you'd
like the little antennas it has. If you don't like it though I can make another one--"

He was cut off by Mike grabbing the sides of his face and pressing their lips together. He turned to
goo in seconds, kissing back and scooting closer to his boyfriend.

"It's perfect, I love it," Mike said, kissing his nose, "you're perfect."

"I still haven't gotten my present yet."

"That's because it's still on the way."

Will rolled his eyes, "you're full of shit."

"It is! When you get it you're so going to regret this conversation."

"Oh I bet."

Mike narrowed his eyes, "fine, if you get to have an attitude about this, then I get to complain
about how you were late to our date last week. After I made it so special and--"

"You looked really pretty today," he said, biting at the inside of his cheek.

"See? See this is what I'm talking about, you are trying to change the topic, you point out all my
flaws but then I--"

Will ran his fingers through Mike's hair, "oh I don't know what flaws you're talking about, you
don't have any."

"Now you're just being a kiss ass."

"Your hair is so soft, how isn't everyone in love with you? They must have poor taste."
Mike's cheeks were flaming red, "stop it."

"You are my favorite person ever," he whispered, pulling Mike closer, "so so gorgeous."

"Stop flirting with me I'm trying to make a scene."

Will hummed softly, "of course sweetheart, how dare I? Go right ahead."

"You're terrible."

"I love you."

Mike's face fell into a gentle smile, "I love you, too. I am serious though, you better be on time to
our next one or I won't talk to you for a week."

"Well we can't have that, what would I do without you? I'd perish."

"I didn't know you knew how to flirt," Mike said, his face practically on fire.

Will grinned, "only for you."

Mike rolled his eyes, "alright I've heard enough, I'm officially embarrassed."

"Do you have a band aid?"

"What? Are you hurt--"

"Because I scraped my knee falling for you."

Mike groaned, "no stop it, I'm going to leave."

"I would never play hide and seek with you because someone like you is impossible to find."

"I'm breaking up with you," Mike said, laughter spilling past his lips as Will pulled him closer.

" Are you a magician? It’s the strangest thing, but every time I look at you, everyone else
disappears." Will peppered Mike's face, puncturing each word with a kiss.

"Mercy! Mercy please stop," Mike got out, laughing in a way that made him sound out of breath.
Will joined him, squeezing the boy close.

"I don’t know which is prettier today—the weather, or your eyes."

"The weather was terrible today."

Will snorted, "forget about that for a second."

"I love you," Mike said, giving him a short kiss, "but I hate everything you've said in the last few
minutes."

"I love you and I love everything I've said in the past few minutes."

Mike grinned, "well then I guess I liked it too. Just a little."

Comfort washed over him, and Will found that the sense of dread that used to dance with him was
finally gone. He leaned into Mike's side, allowing himself the bliss. It felt like part of his life was
over, but in the best way possible. The danger was gone, no matter if it was ideal or not, it was all
done and for good this time.

Will clenched his right hand into a fist, and for the first time in awhile, it listened to him.
 Chapter 45
Chapter Notes

State Lines- Novo Amor

Snow had melted, the grass slowing gaining its color back. Mike found himself enjoying the sun
more now, it could be harsh at times, almost blinding, but he didn't hide away as much now.

Mike was curled up in his room, any attempts to study seemed to be falling short. He pushed the
papers away, joints cracking as he leaned back. His door squeaked open, and a burst of irritation hit
him.

"Mom, what--" He cut himself off, eyes widening as he realized who had peeked in, "oh."

Holly was standing in the entryway, seeming slightly nervous. That look was enough to cause
Mike's posture to collapse.

"Hey, you can come in."

She didn't say a word and shuffled towards him, "I need help."

"What's wrong?" He asked, voice ringing with worry.

"I need help with an art project," she muttered, "mom said to ask you for help."

"An art project? What is it?"

Holly scooted closer, hopping on the edge of his bed, "it's a nature project, I need to use colored
pencils and then give a presentation on what it is."
"So you just have to draw?"

She nodded, "yep, can you do it for me?"

Mike felt his heart swell. She held a smile that he hadn't seen in ages, it was teasing and bordered
with an innocence every child mastered. Holly kicked her feet back and forth, sitting patiently and
waiting for a response.

"Can you trace something?"

Holly rolled her eyes, "no that's cheating."

"Well I don't know how to draw--" he cut himself off, an idea brightening, "just a minute."

Mike scrambled for his phone, trying to find where he had tossed it.

"What are you doing?" Holly asked, voice filled with exasperation.

"I'm getting you help."

The phone only rang twice.

"Hello?"

Mike couldn't help but smile, "are you busy right now?"

"Why?"

"I need your help with something--"

"No I do," Holly interrupted.

"Who was that?" Will asked.

"It's my little sister, she needs help with an art project."

"Well that sounds fun," Will said, "what are you gonna draw?"

"I don't know how to draw that's why I'm calling you, can you come help me?" He whispered into
the phone, sending Holly a timid smile as she stared at him.

"Yeah I'll come, but if I fail my math test tomorrow that's on you."

Mike grinned, "I'll take the blame for whatever you want, thank you."

"Mhm, I'll be there soon. Love you."

"Love you too." He hung up the phone, still tinged pink as Holly refused to cool it with her bug
eyes.

"Who was that?"

"That was my...friend."

Holly pinched her brows together, "are you sure? Dad thinks you have a girlfriend."

That word caused something to coil in his stomach. Mike was trying to live in his own bubble as if
that would completely fix the shame within him.

"I don't have a girlfriend." He looked away from her, twisting harshly at the rings on his fingers.
"Why?"

He almost forgot how inquisitive kids were.

"Cause I just don't have one."

"Do you want one?"

Mike cleared his throat, "no I don't want one."

"I thought you were in a band?"

At the moment everything felt like an odd dream, "what does that have to do with me having a
girlfriend?"

Holly shrugged, "my friend said that musician's always have girlfriends."

"That's not true."

"Why?"

"What's with all the questions?" He asked, trying to force his leg to stop bouncing.

"Mom told me to ask you about your life."

He rolled his eyes, "she did not."

"She so did," Holly snarked right back.

"No she didn't."

"Did so."

Mike crossed his arms, "I do not have a girlfriend, can we be done with the conversation?"

"Then why did you tell the person on the phone that you love them?"

He flushed, "you can say that to your friends."

"No you can't."

Mike groaned, "who gave you the attitude?"

"My friend Isabelle."

"I don't like Isabelle," he grumbled.

"I'm telling her you said that."

He scrunched his nose up, "you better not."

"I will."

"Mom will be pissed--"

"You can't cuss in front of me."

"I can cuss, you just can't," he shot back.

Holly pursed her lips, "if you can then I can too."

"No you can't--"

There was a soft knock on his door, and Mike straightened himself out.

"Yeah?" he said, ignoring the glare Holly had narrowed at him.

Will walked in, a warm smile gracing his features. It was impossible for him to keep up any hint of
irritation.

"Hi, your mom let me in," Will said, turning to Holly, "hi Holly."

She waved, cheeks burning red. Mike raised an eyebrow in question but decided against any
teasing.

"Did you start on anything?" Will asked.

"We were waiting for you."

Mike watched as Will glanced between them, "We're probably going to need paper."

"I set it up in the basement," Holly said, jumping off the bed, "mom bought me a new box of
pencils."

There was a glow in Will's eyes once she spoke. Mike couldn't help but lose himself in it.
Something had changed throughout their months of knowing one another, at the beginning Will
reminded him of an ancient painting, there was a life and story behind the stiff posture, but it was
one impossible to know. Now, the eyes that used to hold a sadness gleamed with life, and Mike
knew that he would fall in love with that look more times than comprehensible.
Holly guided them down to the basement, and they moved quickly so they weren't stopped by his
nosey mother. The house held a warmth again, and Mike began to ponder on how quickly things
had changed in his life. The once lonely hole that had been drilled into him was being filled with a
new sense of joy.

"You cleaned up down here," Will said, breaking him out of his stupor.

"Just did some dusting." He grinned, watching as Holly dropped down in front of the coffee table
and began lining up her pencils. With her distracted Mike leaned over and pressed a kiss to Will's
head, "thanks for coming."

Will looked up at him with a smile, "of course, I've been wanting to meet your sister--"

"I'm ready!" Holly interrupted, batting her lashes at both of them, "you can draw for me now."

They both sat down on the ground. Holly was at the end while he and Will were across from one
another. It was cozy, the heat blanketing around them.

"No one is drawing for you, we're going to help," Mike said.

Will chuckled, "so, what are you supposed to be making?"

"It's supposed to be a nature picture."

"Anything with nature? Animals, plants, stuff like that?"

Holly nodded.

"Do you have anything you want to draw?" Will asked, guiding the conversation while they both
looked to him with doe like eyes.
"I wanna do a tree," Holly said, quickly grabbing a brown colored pencil, "that's an easy one."

"A tree? Really?" Mike scrunched his nose up, looking at the blonde girl who was mirroring his
expression.

"Don't be mean, a tree is great," Will said, causing Holly's face to split into a smile.

"See?" She stuck her tongue out at him.

"What kind of tree are you thinking, Holly?"

She shrugged, "I don't know, what kind of trees are there?"

"Well there's palm trees, willow trees, oak trees--"

"Oak!"

Mike leaned into his hand, "what season?"

"Summer, that's the best season."

"Fall is the best season."

Holly grimaced, "you have school in the fall, that's the worst."

"Pretty leaves though," he said, basking in the comfort beating around him.

That kicked off their journey, or more so Will and Holly's journey. Mike was more than happy to
sit there and watch them interact. There was a beauty to it he'd never experienced. Just by looking
at Will anyone could guess he'd be good with kids, but seeing it first hand was something else
entirely. He held a patience, always keeping a smile on and never interrupting Holly when she was
speaking even if nothing she said made sense. Will moved his care, bending his posture to be level
with the blonde girl.

When Mike thought too much about why his boyfriend was so cautious, it caused his heart to
break. The kindest people are usually to the ones that had to teach themselves what that word
meant.

"Okay, are we adding birds?" Will asked, guiding Holly's hand across the paper so she followed
the outline.

"Birds don't live in this tree," Holly said as if that was fact.

Mike kept his eyes on the picture, "why?"

"Cause this is where squirrels live, and hamsters."

"Hamsters don't live in tress."

Holly swatted his arm, "they live in this tree."

"Sorry boss," he said, holding up his hands in mock surrender and making her laugh.

"Mike said he doesn't have a girlfriend."

"Hey!" He squeaked out, looking at Holly with wide eyes.

Will snorted, not looking up from where he was drawing the leaves, "oh really?"

"Aren't old people supposed to have girlfriends? Mike is old."

"I'm eighteen," he muttered, cheeks flaming red. Will glanced to him with a smirk.
"That is pretty old, isn't it?" Will said, gently nudging Holly's arm.

The little girl giggled brightly, "very old."

"Will doesn't have a girlfriend either."

"How dare you? I most definitely have a girlfriend," Will joked.

"Really? Is she pretty?"

At this point Holly seemed to be doing a perfect job at distracting them enough so that Will would
do all the work. Mike couldn't help but be impressed.

"Oh she's very very pretty," Will said, carefully picking up the green pencil, "she's got nice eyes,
and curly hair."

"What color is it?" Holly pressed.

"It's black, has a great shine to it." Will hummed, "I love her very much."

Mike felt like he was going to melt into the floor, at this point it was embarrassing that Holly hadn't
figured them out. Will seemed unaffected as he shaded in the leaves, which only caused Mike's
lovesick expression to grow.

"So my brother is a loser?" Holly asked as if the news was heartbreaking.

"Who taught you to be so mean?" Mike grumbled, sending the snarky girl a half-hearted glare.

"Isabelle."
He rolled his eyes, "of course."

"Mike is not a loser," Will said, handing Holly the pencil, obviously having figured out her game,
"I'm sure there are many people that would be lucky to be with him."

"My dad said he'd be surprised if Mike actually got someone to date him," Holly said off-handedly,
tongue poking out as she tried to draw in the lines, "I thought that was mean."

Mike felt his heart clench, face burning with humiliation. He didn't dare look at Will, eyes trained
to the floor. The innocent words cut into him, reminding him of the boy that used to mercilessly
get pushed into lockers and mocked. Mike crossed his arms, trying to protect a boy that was no
longer there.

"Yes, that is very mean," Will spoke softly, but Mike could hear the anger shimmering below the
words. He raised his eyes, catching Will's own easily.

"It's uh, it's fine--"

"I think you're cool sometimes, if you tell girls you're a musician they'll probably wanna date you,
just like Isabelle said." Holly put the pencil down, "is this good?"

They both looked at the finished product. The bark was shaded with three different browns, though
it was easy to tell which ones Holly had done and which ones Will had, but Mike thought it brought
a personality to it. The leaves were morphed together, difficult to make out individually. Except for
one. It was towards the left corner, the color was rich, detail obvious within the lines. Mike found
himself stuck on it. The leaf over-powered the rest, beautifully strong and captivating.

He pointed to it, "that ones pretty."

Will's eyes were on him, and Mike looked to his boyfriend. Something wove between their stares, a
silent question bouncing between the both of them.

"Yeah, very pretty," Will said, sending him a tiny grin.

"I gotta add the sun," Holly grabbed a yellow pencil and wasted no time scribbling it in the corner,
"Mike look!"

"Oh that's very good," he said, running a hand through her hair as she bounced excitedly. There
was a pride glowing on her face. Mike decided he wanted her to keep that look for as long as
possible. "Why don't you go show mom?"

"Okay!" Holly bounded up the stairs, picture gripped tightly in hand.

"I don't like your dad," Will said.

Mike let out a sigh, "he's just like that it's fine, I mean I was pretty lame and everything--"

"It doesn't matter if you were lame, that's messed up."

"Okay first of all, what you're supposed to say is 'poor baby sweetheart, how could anyone say that
to you, you're so cool and fun' and then give me a kiss or something. Did you really just call
me lame?"

Will widened his eyes, trying to hide a smile, "I'm sorry, you're not lame--"

"It's too late no take backs, now I get to say something back."

"You can't I'm sensitive," Will got up and plopped down next to him, "I think you're a super fun
dork if that counts. I love you."

"Kiss ass," he muttered, leaning in to ghost his lips over Will's, "do you really think I'm pretty?"

"Of course I do," Will gave him a quick peck, "the prettiest."

"Are you still going to that party tomorrow night?" He asked, brushing a hand through Will's hair.
Will grimaced, "I don't want to."

"Max wants us all the go, she said it'll be fun."

"I'm only staying for an hour."

"Two hours?"

Will hummed, "okay two hours but then you have to buy me dinner."

"I would have done that anyway," he said, not being able to stop himself from reeling Will in for
another kiss, "want me to buy you ice cream too?"

"How many hours do I have to stay for you to buy me a new car?" Will's words were muffled as
Mike refused to pull back.

Quickly, Mike kissed around the other boy's face, "three days."

"That's it?"

"A week."

"That's unreasonable."

Mike leaned back, "you're so right, how dare I? I'll get you a car for free."

"I'll settle for a golf cart."

He barked out a laugh, "oh you'll settle? Such an angel."

"Is it legal to just drive gold carts around?" Will asked.

"You have to have doors."

"That's not a thing, jeeps don't have doors."

Mike tugged the boy closer, "well jeeps are jeeps."

"If you're going to make a point you have to back it up, what about golf carts with doors?"

"Will, they don't get up to the speed limit."

"Have you driven a golf cart before?" Much to Mike's dismay, Will slowly pulled away and began
cleaning up the colored pencils.

"No, but its common sense."

"Oh so I'm dumb?"

Mike's eyes widened comically, "no, no of course not, I'm sorry I didn't--"

"I'm kidding, Mike." Will turned to him, kissing the top of his head, "I could just drive my golf cart
around the backyard."

"Can we have joint custody of the golf cart?"

"Every other week?" Will said.

"Perfect."
There was a comfortable silence, and Mike didn't bother moving as Will tidied up their mess. He
was just happy Will didn't turn around, knowing the look on his face was most likely humiliating.

"So, tomorrow night?" He asked.

Will sighed, "yes I'll go, but I'm not babysitting if everyone gets drunk--"

"Oh I won't drink."

"Why? Did you get designated driver duty or something?"

Mike pinched his brows together, "no, because you're not drinking."

"You don't...you don't have to do that," Will said, turning to look at him, "I don't want to ruin your
fun."

"I will have loads more fun just being with you then getting drunk. I promise." Mike felt pride
swell in him as Will's cheeks flushed.

"Okay."

"Yeah?"

Will smiled, "yeah."

----------

"You didn't say this was Jason's party," Mike hissed as he sat in the back seat of Eddie's car.

"I didn't think it would matter," Max said.

Robin shifted in the passenger seat, "it's gonna be such a big party we won't even see him, don't
worry about it."

He looked out the window, nerves wringing in him. Mike put a lot of work into avoiding Jason, all
of their past encounters had been less than positive and the idea of coming face to face with the
blond left his stomach in knots.

"Are you driving back with us?"

Mike glanced at Max, "no, I'm going with Will."

She smiled, "that's good, you got him to come?"

"Uh yeah, wasn't too hard."

"Bet it wasn't," Robin said.

"What does that mean?"

She shrugged, her face morphed with a grin, "I mean he does anything you want, it's super sweet."

"That's not true," Mike argued, cheeks flaming.

"Come on Wheeler, just let the boy love you," Eddie smirked at him through the rear view mirror.

"I-- I mean I do, that's not--" he let out a long breath, "we're doing good."

"You seem happier."

Mike felt the tension leave his shoulders, "I am."

There wasn't a hint of laughter, and the teasing was barely there. He knew everyone had caught
onto their relationship, it wasn't like they were hiding it but Mike hadn't been able to bring himself
to say anything. Seeing the genuine smiles being sent his way caused a weight to leave his
shoulders.

"Good, that's what we want," Robin said as they pulled up to the house.

He was relieved to find that the others were already there, his eyes finding Will in seconds. Jane
was next to him, both siblings leaning close as they engaged in conversation. Lucas and Chrissy
were there too, all four standing in a small huddle.

"Hey guys!" Robin said, trying to speak over the music.

Mike immediately migrated to Will's side, sending Jane a smile as he did so. The girl merely rolled
her eyes jokingly, but kept the grin tied on. Sometimes it was hard to be around her, the guilt he felt
hadn't dissipated and the one thing Mike struggled with was apologies. With Will it always came
easy, everyone else seemed to be a different story. Truly a curse.

"Hi," Will said, leaning into his side, "did you know this was at Jason's?"

"No, I probably wouldn't have come if I did," he whispered into his boyfriend's ear.

"An hour?"

Mike nodded, "an hour."

"This is a new song," Steve said, walking up to them with a cup in his hand.

"No it's not," Mike said, throwing an arm over Will's shoulder. The corner they were in was
secluded enough that he couldn't find nerves within him.
"Yes it is I've never heard it before."

"That doesn't make it new, maybe you just need to expand your music library."

"Yeah," Will said.

"Oh don't start," Steve sent them both a glare, "then tell me who it's by, if it's a classic--"

"He never said it was a classic, he said it was new," Will continued, snaking an arm around his
waist, "if it was a classic then it'd be embarrassing that you didn't know it."

"That's true," Mike said cheekily, enjoying the way Steve's irritation grew. The others were
absorbed in their own conversations, ignoring any teasing going on. Well, everyone besides Jane.

"What-- Jane, back me up."

She grinned into her cup, "don't drag me into this, I don't know music."

"Neither of you know who it's by, you're just trying to mess with me."

"Why would we do that, Steve?" He teased.

Will nodded, "yeah, Steve."

"You're both insufferable." He said, downing the rest of his drink.

"Steve! Come get a drink," Dustin yelled, waving him over. It seemed that Steve was fine with
abandoning their conversation, wandering away with the others as they scavenged for ways to get
drunk.

"Shit, hey I need to grab my keys off Lucas, I'll be right back," Will said, stepping out of his
embrace. Mike suddenly felt cold as he watched his boyfriend disappear into the crowd.

"Lucas always gets drunk really fast," Jane said, empty cup still held in hand, "easy to lose him."

"Remember that time I had to drag you all to his car--"

"Wheeler!"

Mike felt his blood run cold, stomach dropping with panic in seconds. Based on the way Jane's
eyes widened, he knew exactly who it was. Jason was wearing a mocking smile, walking closer
with a sense of ease that Mike hated.

"Didn't know I invited you," the blond said.

"You invited the whole school," he muttered, suddenly wishing he hadn't decided to not drink. He
glanced at Jane who seemed just as uncomfortable as he was.

"Saw you with Byers, might want to be more careful with that next time--"

Mike cut him off, "oh I'm sorry, I figured you might be jealous. He told me about the 'wonderful'
kiss you two shared."

Jane let out a sharp laugh, but Jason's face darkened. Maybe it was time he invested in some
lessons on how to keep his mouth shut.

"Do you really think I would do shit like that? Wheeler, it's sick...look if you're going to suck face
with your boyfriend maybe do it in private," Jason stepped closer, "it's fucking gross and I don't
want people leaving cause of something like you."

Mike took a step back, his heart pounding. That disgust he had felt in himself rose, he watched as
Jason sneered and it suddenly felt like the whole room was staring. Mike was sure that if he looked
around he'd see the laughter, see people mocking him at every turn.
He blinked quickly and turned around, pushing his way through the hoard of people.

"Mike!" He heard Jane call, but he got away from her before she could say anything else.

Ripping open the first door he saw, Mike slid down against it. His breathing was erratic, tears
slipping down his cheeks no matter how hard he tried to stop them. Mike pulled his knees close,
trying to piece together how such simple words could reduce him to nothing.

Loving Will had never felt wrong, but maybe being loved back was the problem.

"Mike? Are you in here?" Jane's voice came a few minutes later.

He wiped his eyes, "y-yeah, sorry I'll--"

"Can I come in?"

There were a few beats of silence before Mike shifted away and allowed Jane to open the closet
door. He only then realized where he was and it felt sickeningly fitting.

"Will and Lucas came back...they got kicked out pretty fast," Jane said, sending him a timid smile.
They sat smooshed together on the floor, "I told them I'd come find you."

"What happened?" He sniffled out.

"Well, they kind of heard the end of what he was saying, Will punched him but he's not really great
at that so Lucas kind of finished it off. They are both now banned from ever coming back here,"
she said, bumping their shoulders together.

"Are you okay?"

He shrugged, "I don't know."

"I'm sorry I didn't--"

Mike cut her off, "no you didn't do anything don't apologize. I'm being stupid."

"No you're not," she paused, "nothing is wrong with you, you know that right?"

He felt more tears well up, "I don't know. I-I-- I think I've known I was...I was gay for a long time,
I just never wanted to accept it. I thought that if I ignored it and convinced everyone else that I
liked girls then maybe I would. Then Will-- I tried so hard a-and it's like it doesn't matter how
much I ignore it, to know that there will be people that look at me and just think that there's
something wrong with me...I don't know if I can do it. I'm not strong like Will o-or resilient, my
dad already fucking hates me, I feel like my mom just pities me sometimes and I-- shit, I'm sorry, I
don't want to dump that on you."

Jane leaned into his side, her eyes glistening, "you know what's super cool? You actually fell in
love with someone, through all of that, through all the crap, you accepted who you were because
you fell in love. That is probably the most beautiful thing anyone could ever wish for. I mean, even
if you hated yourself, even though you were terrified no one would accept you, you still had this
experience of falling in love with someone who loves you too. You got to accept something about
yourself because of that. So, forever you get to know that what you have is real, there was no
standards or pressure, there was nothing other than this...than this love that you got to feel. Do you
know how fucking awesome that it?"

He let out a watery laugh, surprised by the cuss word that slipped out. Mike didn't bother clearing
his face of tears. Jane's voice was shaken, the words coming out with a raw purity that made his
heart clench.

"You found something out about yourself through a feeling people strive for their entire lives, and
if anyone says anything you can just smugly know that you get to live your life actually knowing
what falling in love feels like." Jane clenched her eyes shut, "I've been jealous of you and Will
forever. N-Not because I still have a crush on you, I don't, but because I want that. I want someone
to love me like that. I don't care what you are to someone like Jason, to me you're like a dream. I
wish I could sit here and understand what you're feeling, but I can't, I really can't because I don't
understand how the entire world isn't just burning with jealously."

Mike looked at her, lips parted with shock, "Jane..."

"I'm sorry, that's probably not what you want to hear--"

He didn't let her finish, quickly yanking her into a hug. Mike rested his head on hers, not caring as
tears gathered on his face. The embrace was a breath of fresh air and he dreaded the moment he'd
have to let go. Jane slowly hugged him back and relaxed into the hold.

"Thank you," he choked out, "thank you. I'm sorry about everything...if I was different I would
have loved to love you. Someone is going to be so lucky, I'm sorry it wasn't me."

Jane gripped him tighter, "I'm not sorry. I don't know if I can imagine a world where you love me
like you love Will, and I don't think I want you to anymore."

He nodded, "I do love you though, in a different way. You're an amazing friend."

"So are you." She squeezed him, "and I better someday be your sister-in-law, if all that drama was
for nothing I swear to god--"

Mike pushed her shoulder, "hey you can't make fun of me, your brother has a thing for theatrics."

She let out a long laugh, "he does, doesn't he? Definitely knows how to put on a performance, got
some great lines in."

Mike leaned his head on her shoulder, "I love you."

"I love you too," she paused, "we should probably go soon though, I don't trust Will won't come
marching back in here if we don't show up."

"Oh right," he helped her off the ground. "Definitely not coming back here again.

"Definitely not."

They walked out and Mike closed the closet door, making a promise to himself to never step back
inside.
 Chapter 46
Chapter Notes

Northern Attitude- Noah Kahan

See the end of the chapter for more notes

"Say that she rail, why then tell her plan--"

"It's plain."

Mike dropped his shoulders, "no it's not."

"Yes it is. I'm holding the script," Will said, turning the booklet so Mike could see. "That means
I'm right, you're wrong."

"It must have been a typo."

"Plan doesn't even make sense. It's 'say that she rail, why then tell her plain she sings as sweetly--"

"That doesn't sound right."

Will held back an eye roll. He had thought helping Mike run through lines for his audition would
have been easy. That had been the first mistake. His boyfriend was set on being a lead in the school
play, and while Will was more than happy to support that dream, he now wished he'd done so from
a farther distance.

"Well it is right. you keep throwing in your own words."

Mike laid back on the bed, "I can't do this. I'm going to choke."
"You perform fine in front of me." Will looked down at Mike, trying not to laugh at the boy's
distraught expression.

"Can you audition with me?"

"Absolutely not."

Mike groaned, "oh come on, we could be in a play together. This is a lifelong dream of yours I'm
trying to fulfill."

"I have never in my life wanted to stand on a stage and recite Shakespeare." He placed the script
down and tugged on one of Mike's loose curls.

"What's the next line?"

"Um," he looked down, "well after plain you say 'she sings as sweetly as a nightingale' then you
pause."

Mike's eyes were closed, "can you read the one after that?"

"Say that frown. I'll say she looks as clear as morning roses newly washed with dew." Will read,
absent-mindedly keeping his right hand in Mike's hair.

"Mhm, and the next one?"

He raised a brow, "you couldn't even get the first one right, maybe we should start--"

"Can you just read to me?" Mike asked, his voice soft with hope. "Just...just the whole thing,
please?"

Will felt warmth spread in his chest, "Say that she rail, why then tell her plain she sings as sweetly
as a nightingale: Say that frown. I'll say she looks as clear as morning roses newly washed with
dew: Say she be mute and will not speak a word, then I'll commend her vulnerability, and say she
uttereth piercing eloquence: If she do bid me pack, I'll give her thanks, as though she bid me stay
by her a week: If she deny to wed, I'll crave the day when I shall ask the banns and when be
married."

His words faded into the air. Mike hadn't opened his eyes, and Will found himself staring. Their
was a comfort between them, and he basked in its consistent presence. His room was warm, not
only in temperature, but in sight as well. The blinds were pulled back, flutters of sunlight casting in
on them. Will was hypnotized by the way it carved against Mike's face, somehow making the boy
more ethereal than he already was.

"I like the way you read it." Mike finally said, peeling his eyes open and meeting Will's.

"I'm not a performer, it sounds boring."

Mike sent him a smile, "no, you make it sound perfect."

"I think Shakespeare did that," Will said, catching every ray of light that sparked in Mike's eyes.

"Couldn't be." Mike rolled onto his side, looking up at Will with an expression of unhidden
adoration. "It's gotta be you, that's the only thing that makes sense."

"You're ridiculous," he said, scooting back so he could lay down as well. Mike's gaze followed his
every move. "I'll read to you whenever you want."

"Really?"

"Of course." Will ran his thumb across Mike's cheek, "but I want compensation."

Mike rolled his eyes, "I bought you dinner last night--"

"That's not an hourly wage-- wait no, for every ten words that's five dollars." He turned to his side,
"and if I read a whole novel that'll really add up."
"I can't afford that, you'll have to lower your prices," Mike said with amusement, "I'll just record
your nine words and then stop there. Then the next time I'll give you a new nine words until I can
make a little audiobook."

"Can't do that, I'll have to sue you."

Mike dropped his mouth open, "for what?"

"For taking my voice without permission." Will spoke as if the answer was obvious, "I'm not
getting paid for my work, that's free labor, Mike. Do you really want me doing free labor?"

"Reading a book to me is labor?"

"Yes. I'm being labored to do work. You gave me a request and I spend my time doing something
for you, and in return I get paid."

"I'm your boyfriend."

"Yeah, and I'm a capitalist."

Mike let out a snorting laugh, "you're funny."

"I'm serious," he said, not attempting to hide the smile pulling on his cheeks.

"No you're not. I want you to read those Narnia books to me."

"My mom used to read those to Jane and I."

"Did she do all the voices?"

Will smiled fondly at the memory, "she tried. It was pretty bad though. At first she thought it
would help calm us down before bed but it actually made it worse."

"How old were you?"

"Around six or seven, I think. It was during a time where my dad had a job, he worked at night and
my mom would pull out the books after he left. It was nice."

"Looks like you'll have to carry on the tradition and read to me every night with silly voices."

"You're not my child."

"Well I'm better than that Mr. Capitalist."

Will hummed, "I'm excited for my first dose of free labor."

"No, having your first dose would mean you're receiving the free labor. You're excited to give your
first dose of free labor, does that make sense? You have the dose and you're giving it to me so that
would be--"

"Shut up."

Mike leaned down and pecked his lips, "sorry Mr. Capitalist it won't happen again."

"I don't need an English lesson," Will said with a laugh.

"Well, if you didn't need an English lesson you wouldn't have said it wrong."

Will reached up and placed his hand over Mike's face, "I can't believe you're one of those people.
No one warned me about that before we started dating."

"Don't bullshit me you already knew. I'm making you smarter, that's something to be grateful for,"
Mike said, his voice muffled as Will refused to move his hand, "I'm going to lick you."

"Do not!" Will squeaked, yanking back and pulling his arm away.

"I used to bite, did you know that?"

Will fell onto his back, feeling his breath escape in one swoop. His laughter shook the bed and it
didn't take Mike long to join in.

"You have the teeth of someone who used to bite," he got out, trying to get air into his lungs.

Mike gasped, "what the fuck does that mean?"

"I know you bite your nails."

"That wouldn't ruin my teeth!"

Will wiped his eyes, "it might."

"Now I'm insecure."

"No, I love your teeth. You've got great teeth, amazing teeth," he said, grinning at the other boy.

"They look weird?"

Will eyes widened, "no! I mean you have strong teeth, they don't look like anything."

"I thought you were saying I had messed up teeth."

"I never said that," Will pulled on the hem of Mike's shirt until their lips pressed together,
"everything about you is pretty."

"You're biased." Mike's cheeks were aflame.

"Not one bit," he whispered, their noses bumping together. "Even if you did have messed up teeth
you'd still be beautiful."

"I love you." It sounded like the words had spilled past Mike's lips without thought.

"I love you, too." He leaned back, "do you have to do anything tonight?"

"No, why?"

Will glanced out the window, "we should do something."

"Like what?"

"It's nice out tonight." Was all Will said, eyes still locked on the sky. The blue colors were slowly
fading out and shifting to pink.

Mike hopped off the bed before Will could speak again, "come on."

"What?"

"Come on, I have an idea."

Will stood, confusion filling him, "what is it?"

"It's a surprise, but we have to stop by my house first."

"Does that mean you're driving?" He asked with a grimace.

Mike scoffed, "I'm a fine driver. We should go now though, grab a jacket and meet me in the car."

Before he could ask any further questions, Mike was barreling out of the house with excitement.
For a moment, Will stood there and stared at his open door. It had been a while since he had the
urge to lock it. Will grabbed a sweatshirt and threw a red vest over it, eyes casting towards the
window.

It felt larger now, almost as if it had expanded across the wall. He found himself stuck on it. The
glass became clear and displayed a life not yet experienced. He wanted to reach through it and
touch the memories that sped past. While he knew that logically there were only blooming trees on
the other side of the window, Will saw so much more.

There was a boy.

Finally, Will recognized him. The clothes were still too big, jeans scraping against the ground and
collecting mud. That didn't seem to matter as he saw the smile. It felt like a quiet goodbye; one that
was long overdue. The boy was holding a bike, one Will hadn't seen in years. It was shining and
lacked sight of any dents that he remembered. Will took a step forward, catching a tussle of dark
hair appearing in the picture, the curls straightened out.

Will watched as both figures disappeared. In reality, he knew he was looking into the wrong
timeline. Though, he now believed that in every universe he found the boy with dark eyes and
unyielding resilience.

"Will! Are you coming?" He broke out of his daze as Mike's voice flooded through the house.

"Yeah! Yeah, sorry I'm coming."

He met Mike by the front door, catching his boyfriend's worried stare.

"Are you okay?"

Will smiled, "I'm good, just got distracted."

"You sure?"

He reached a hand out and threaded their fingers together, "positive."

With that, they walked from the house. Will made a point to tighten his seat belt. Mike sent him a
harmless eye roll and pulled out of the driveway. He kept his gaze on the house, watching as it
faded from view. There were times Will imagined what it would be like the finally leave, to find a
place he could start new. The memories he had were both good and bad, but sometimes having
none was better than anything.

"Are you going to tell me where we're going?" He asked, looking at Mike as they got on the road.

Mike shook his head, "nope, you'll have to be patient."

He groaned, "come on, a hint?"

"The hint was me telling you to grab a jacket."

It wasn't long before they were at Mike's house, and Will merely watched as his boyfriend sprinted
through the door. He tapped his leg anxiously, counting down the seconds until he saw Mike
practically falling over himself as he came out of the house. A backpack was slung over his
shoulder which peaked Will's interest.

"What's in there?" He asked.

"You'll see," Mike said breathlessly.

It didn't take long for Will to piece some clues together. Excitement filled him as they began to
take a familiar route. The sky had turned a perfect shade a yellow as they pulled up at the quarry.
The car stopped he wasted no time getting out. Cool winds hit his face, but they weren't harsh
enough to cause any discomfort.

The view could have been plucked from a painting. With fascination Will watched as the yellows
slowly morphed with orange and pink, creating a color he pitied others for not being able to see.

"Wow," he breathed out. Mike was laying out a blanket, straightening the edges.

"Nice, right?" Mike said as Will sat down.

"We haven't been up here forever..." Will tore his eyes from the sky, looking over to the other boy.
Pleasant light casted on the side of Mike's face, causing his usually sharp features to soften.

"Been too cold." Mike leaned back on his hands, "I was actually going to plan a whole date, bring
out candles and stuff. I don't know, I think this is better."

Will glanced around at their surroundings. The blanket was thin and used, and he could peak into
Mike's backpack enough to see a flashlight and some bagged snacks. The idea of a perfectly set
date didn't seem to fit them.

"It is better." He scooted closer until their shoulders were touching, "you told me about your family
when we were here the first time."

"Yeah." Mike paused, "I was super embarrassed about that when I got home."

"Why?"

"Don't know, it was really hard for me to talk to people, even Max. Then you...it all just spilled out
when I was talking to you. I feel it's really easy to pity people and I hate that, I hate the looks and
then when you didn't do that I couldn't help myself."

Will stared, his lips parting, "really?"

"Yeah. I didn't even know I liked you at that point, maybe I didn't. You're just..." Mike turned to
look at him, "you're my best friend."

"You're my best friend, too."

Mike glanced down at his vest, "where did you get that?"

"Oh uh, I got it years ago from some yard sale. Used to be huge on me, but I didn't have a winter
coat so it did the job."

Mike seemed captivated and ran his fingers down the zipper, "I've seen it before."

"This is the first time I've worn it in a while. I found it yesterday when my mom was cleaning out
the hall closet." He spoke with an air of confusion, "is something wrong with it--"

"No of course not it's just...did you have this in middle school?"

Will nodded, "yeah."

Mike snapped his eyes up, looking slightly bewildered. He didn't speak, mouth parted with a spark
of shock.

"Did you use to sit on the swing set before school?"

"Yes--"

Mike let out a bright laugh, "oh my god. It was you."

"What was me?" He pressed, wishing to follow whatever train of thought Mike was on.

"I knew you looked familiar the first time I saw those pictures in your house. Oh my god, there
was something about you I knew it--"
"Mike, what are you talking about?" He asked, grabbing his boyfriends hand.

"Did you make a habit of tripping kids in middle school?"

For a moment Will sat there, his face pinched with uncertainty. That didn't seem to deter Mike's
confidence. A jolt hit him, vague memories coming back in a single swoop. Mike looked nothing
like he did back in middle school, the polos were gone, any sign of control in his hair leaving right
along with it; but he was the same kid below it all. The lanky boy that used to get bullied and
thrown into lockers was sitting across from him.

"Oh my god..." he breathed out, the two separate people finally clicking together. "I totally forgot
about that."

Mike leaned in and kissed his nose, "I can't believe you still wear that thing."

"It's warm!" He protested, holding the vest close.

"I love it." Mike turned to his bag, "and I uh...I actually brought you something. It's kind of stupid
and stuff--"

"Let me see," he said softly, bumping Mike's shoulder to show some encouragement.

Will's eyes were zeroed in on the bag, and he watched as Mike pulled out a small radio. It looked
used and outdated. It was yellow, and while the color was faded with age, Will found himself
falling in love with the tiny object. He carefully took it into his hands, a giddy smile coming out as
he messed with the limp antenna.

"Where did you get this?"

"I've had it for awhile. Made me think of you." Mike pointed at it, "I think you need some yellow
in your room."
Will looked into the other boy's eyes, "I can have it?"

"Of course you can, it's yours." Mike took it, "here, it doesn't play a lot of channels, but there's
classical, rock, and jazz. If you mess with it enough other stuff comes up, but I've never been able
to make it sound decent."

Static started up, and Will was mesmerized by it. Eventually, the sound of a piano flooded in,
whispers of violins not far behind.

"There we go," Mike said, placing the radio down, "how's that?"

"Perfect." Will stood to his feet, "dance with me."

It seemed that an ocean of emotions went through Mike. His brows twitched as if Will had just
gotten down on one knee. Just as he grew unsure by his declaration, Mike took his hand and got
up, the quiet music still moving around them.

"I never got to ask you," Mike whispered.

"What?"

"At Homecoming. I was going to ask you to dance with me..."

Will pressed his eyes closed, "oh."

"I'm not...I mean, it's better that I didn't. I actually don't even know how to dance."

He pushed away his guilt, "well, I'll teach you."

Mike raised a brow, "you know how?"

"Yep. My mom taught me." Will cleared his throat, "okay, it's like the waltz but kinda all the
wrong steps."

"So you don't know how to dance--"

"Shush, I'm leading." Will took Mike's left hand in his own, "then I'm gonna put my other one
under your shoulder blade."

"What do I do?" Mike asked, his voice riddled with laughter.

"Put it on my shoulder and step closer."

Mike did as he was told, his eyes still trained down. The music was dull behind them, flowing right
along with the calm winds.

"Like this?"

Will nodded, "yeah, now look at me."

"I can't, I need to watch my feet so I don't step--"

He gently grabbed Mike's chin and pulled his face up, "look at me."

Mike's breath audibly caught, and Will sent him a reassuring smile. The sight around them was
captivating, reminding him of an unattainable dream. He tugged Mike just a step closer, heart
racing as their eyes didn't break apart.

"Now just follow my lead," Will whispered, listening closer to the music and picking up a rhythm.
He took a step back, pulling Mike along to follow him. In hindsight he knew what they were doing
wasn't the actual waltz, but the technicalities of it were an afterthought.

"Am I doing it?" Mike asked.

"I think so."

"You think so? You're supposed to be the expert."

Will let out a laugh, "my mom usually just spun me around."

"Oh?" Mike said, a mischievous glint in his eye, "you mean like this?"

Before he knew it their once calm motions turned into the complete opposite. Mike easily picked
up his own way of doing things and Will was grateful for that, his body vibrating with joy as he
spun around clumsily.

"Wow, I think I'm actually the expert here," Mike said rocking them back and forth, "come on
Will, step on my feet and I'll guide you."

"Absolutely not, this isn't dancing." He said, allowing the other boy to yank him closer, "you need
a better teacher."

Mike hummed, "you're the best teacher."

"Does this make up for Homecoming?" He asked as they slowed. Mike leaned forward and pressed
their foreheads together. For a moment they were unmoving, and Will allowed himself to drop into
the feeling.

"Yes."

Will ran a hand up until it was cupping the back of Mike's neck. He let out a shaky breath before
leaning in for a kiss. There wasn't much to it, but Will put all he could into the soft motion. The
months of turmoil and pain had led them to that moment, and he knew there wasn't a word in
existence that could explain the love he felt. Mike's hands dropped his waist, tugging him closer,
and Will felt understood.
He spoke as they pulled apart, "Do you think...if things had been different and I didn't get hurt the
way I did, would we still--"

Mike cut him off, "it was always going to be you, alright? Even if things were different and it took
us longer to get here, it was always you and nothing can change that."

Will sighed, "so you don't think there's a world where you just hate me forever?"

"Not possible." Mike grinned and pulled them back to the blanket. The sun was getting closer to
falling, but the sky hadn't lost its color just yet. Will stared out into the horizon, wishing he could
reach out and feel the sensation of freedom against his fingers.

"I don't think I want to stay here."

"What do you mean?" Mike asked, laying down on his back.

Will followed, "in my house. This town. Too much has happened and I just...I want to find
somewhere to breathe."

"Well, we can find somewhere to breathe together."

He turned his head with a grin, "really?"

"Of course." Mike's eyes met his, "I've never wanted to stay here either. It's like you're constantly
living in your memories and now matter what you do--"

"You can't get out."

"Yeah."

Will looked back to the sky, "it's hard to say goodbye to this. I know someday I'm going to have to,
but it feels like I just got my life back and it's just...I don't know if I can fully live it here. I want
something else, I want to walk into a house that's different and not filled with all this...this shit."
"If you could go anywhere, where would it be?"

He looked to his boyfriend, following every line and familiar piece of him. Will had drawn his face
more times than he could count at that point. Mike's curved nose and roused hair that never
seemed knotted, his lips that were always tinted pink with warmth, and the dust of freckles that he
found himself wanting to connect. It was Mike, every tiny piece came together and created the one
person Will cared for most.

"With you."

Mike looked at him sharply, "what?"

"I don't care where I go, I just want to be with you," he spoke as if that truth had only just come to
him. "I don't think I'll be able to have a home somewhere else if you're not there. Is that okay?"

"That's...yeah that's very okay." Mike paused, "I want that too."

Mike reached out and squeezed his hand, familiar rings digging right into Will's skin. He smiled,
finding reassurance within the touch. Music began to drift away and then there was only Mike.
Within every road he had gone down, the ending point always seemed the same. Will had been
sure that his life had been planned for him and that he'd drift through the days without a say.

Then some random guy came knocking on his car window and that road began to shift. It may
have hit speed bumps, long lights, detours, and hills that could barely be climbed, but they gave
him something to fight for. A better life. He didn't know what the end looked like, not anymore,
and that was a relief that had never been gifted to him.

Will was his own person. The vines that once held him down had been cut up, and he had the
scissors in his hand. He once believed that there were people only meant to be phases or life
lessons for others. Will had given up hope that he wasn't that person. That he wasn't a something
instead of a someone.

When Mike had looked at him, Will learned to look at himself.

 He squeezed back, gripping tightly onto the other boy's hand as the sun fell around them. There
was an ending that left with the light, a curtain dropping on their final act.

"Yeah?" He asked, voice cutting right above a whisper.

"Yeah."

When the road finally ended, when it fell into nothing, he'd be proud. The gravel will be destroyed
and barely paved over, but it'll be his. Flawed beauty was better than flawless perfection. In the
end, that's all there really was.

Soon he'd get in his car and hope it drove long enough to get him to the next path; but if it broke
down, he wouldn't be alone in fixing it.

Not anymore.

The End

Chapter End Notes

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