Self-Care for Black Women: 150 Ways to Radically Accept & Prioritize Your Mind, Body, & Soul

Why Black Women Must Practice Self-Care

Black women are phenomenal. We come in different shapes, sizes, and shades. Some of us are mixed-race. Some of us have strong roots that are linked to Latin American countries, as well as the Caribbean. Some of us don’t speak a lick of English. Some of us have skin color that is as dark as a vanilla bean or as light as cane sugar. Throughout history, Black women have been the glue in their communities. We provide physical and emotional support to families, friends, and strangers. We band together to uplift neighborhoods. We teach. We nurture. We build. And while we accomplish great things, we are being killed silently, because we do not practice proper self-care.

To be Black in this world is to constantly struggle. If you don’t live with it, then you see it. And sometimes, you witness and experience it. It’s a global struggle that started with the transatlantic slave trade and colonization. For centuries, Black people have been looked at as second-class citizens of the world. Used for our labor. Robbed of our identities. Gawked at for our unique features. And even though slavery was abolished, the societal system that was created as a result of white supremacy still exists to this day. Intergenerational trauma persists. This is trauma that was passed on from one generation to the next through learned behaviors and emotions. Understand this: The system was built to exhaust and exclude Black people. It was not built to help us win, which is why we—my sistahs—must look out for ourselves and each other.

Get ready to learn about how you can take care of your mind, body, and soul. Now more than ever, you must pour back into yourself what you so freely give to others. You will be introduced to topics like radical self-care (actively putting your wellness before others) and race-based traumatic stress (your body’s response to mental and emotional damage). In addition, you will be given the tools to take back the power you need to put your wellness first.

The Reason for Self-Care

Ever feel overwhelmed, worn down, and burned out but you can’t really identify the cause? Let me introduce you to something called race-based traumatic stress. The stress you experience related to racism is hurting your health—even the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) confirmed it. Most health issues in Black women can be linked back to some form of racism. Whether it be on a personal or institutional level, racism is a proven risk factor for death in Black people. For example, racism attacks when your pleas for proper medical attention are ignored in the hospital. It attacks when you’re sequestered into neighborhoods that lack proper resources. It attacks when you’re not given the same life-altering opportunities as others. An overload of stress like this traumatically impacts your overall wellness. Your mind, body, and soul become so overwhelmed that these three vital areas of your life are unable to properly function. Hence, the need for self-care. Attending to yourself when you are experiencing traumatic stress is essential to maintaining your well-being.

What Is Race-Based Traumatic Stress?

Race-based traumatic stress was coined by Robert T. Carter, PhD. It describes your body’s response to mental and emotional damage caused by negative race-related encounters, a.k.a. racism. Research has found that when you experience race-based traumatic stress, your body mimics the way it would react with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). This means that being on the receiving end of race-based discriminations, prejudice, hate crimes, or microaggressions can give you PTSD. Which means you have probably been walking around with a low-grade version of PTSD for many years, perhaps even decades. For instance, when you have paranoid or obsessive thoughts about how you should act to not be seen as a threat, that’s PTSD. It throws off the functioning of your entire body.

The fact is, stress hurts. It leads to other debilitating diseases. And the hard truth is, racial stress kills. It leads to illnesses that cause death in your mind, body, and soul. With symptoms of PTSD, you become consumed by your perceived threat and are hyperfocused on keeping yourself safe. This makes it hard for you to simply enjoy life. However, no one has the time for that when we’re just trying to survive being a Black woman in a racist and sexist society.

Self-Care in a Patriarchal Society

The stress that Black women experience from racism is combined with the stress of sexism. On top of racial trauma, Black women also have the pressure of dealing with being a woman in a patriarchal society, a man’s world. First the world tells you that you are less than because you’re Black. And then it says, Don’t forget. You’re a woman too. You’ve got to act a certain way. You’ve got to meet unrealistic beauty standards. You can’t get paid as much as men. And just as you settle into the complexities of your womanhood, you’re reminded, Don’t forget. You’re Black too. It’s a cycle that beats on your ability for self-care. Well, enough is enough. You know that systemic change is the key to full healing, but you need to take measures now to protect your well-being. You must bow out of the oppressive fight that is trying to kill you. It’s time for you to regain control over your health. It’s time to practice radical self-care.

What Is Radical Self-Care?

Radical self-care is the active decision to put your wellness before anyone or anything else. For Black women, it is a form of protest against a society that is determined to oppress us to death. By choosing to intentionally take care of yourself, you are letting the world know that you are a person who knows her worth and cannot be made a Black martyr. Radical self-care goes beyond your physical fitness. It also includes your emotional well-being, as well as the condition of your soul or spirit. This is called the mind-body-soul connection. Research has found that these three areas of your life are intertwined, so when one is acting up, it impacts the other two. Thus, you must learn when to use your radical self-care skills.

When to Use Radical Self-Care

Knowing when you need to use radical self-care is essential to your wellness. The answer? Every day. What makes radical self-care so different from other types of self-care is that it requires you to give your full attention to your well-being. Ever get a stomachache when you had to make a tough decision? Or when you were feeling extremely nervous? Or how about the time you said yes to something you didn’t want to do? You know what I’m talking about. Bubble guts.

Bubble guts is an example of our mind, body, and soul talking to each other. Our spirit senses something isn’t right, our mind is shooting out unhappy emotions, and our body is reacting as the stress hormones course through it. Incidents like this are signals that something is out of order within you, and that one of your needs must be addressed to maintain your health. To do this, maintaining balance within your three spheres of wellness is very important. You must use one of your acquired wellness tools. But real talk, that can be hard to do. Life happens. You get so distracted by the flow of your life that you forget to take care of yourself. Therefore, finding a practice of self-care that works for you is essential to the upkeep of your overall health.

How to Practice Radical Self-Care

To properly practice self-care, you must focus on all three areas: mind, body, and soul. Self-care is a set of daily practices that you do to support your well-being. These exercises, activities, or actions require you to put yourself first every day. Yes, girl. Every day. Self-care calls for you to get in touch with your inner being so you can learn what helps you cope in times of distress and what helps you create a life of happiness. Through self-care you gain knowledge on who you are as a person, allowing you to fall in love with the incredible woman you are on a daily basis.

The Purpose of Radical Self-Care

In addition, pursuing a life filled with self-care improves wellness and prevents illness and disease. The act of self-care has become critical to surviving in the modern world, especially as a Black woman. It helps you create a safe space for yourself in a society that does not care to make room for you. You help your future self and encourage personal growth when you engage in it. For you, self-care is a necessity and not a luxury.

Mental Self-Care

One of the most important areas to begin your focus of self-care is your mental health—the mind. This is the epicenter for your wellness. Your brain is a dynamic organ. It controls all the functions of your body. So much of how your brain operates dictates the person you become. Your memories, intelligence, and emotions are stored in your mind. From the time you’re in the womb until you are in your late twenties, your brain is continually developing. What you go through in your childhood shapes the way you think, behave, and react. Through your family, you’re introduced to things like love, self-worth, and conflict resolution. You may create unhealthy habits that were birthed from the early years of your brain development. You may even have traumatic experiences that alter the way you perceive people and things. But what is so fascinating about that brain of yours is that it has the capacity to reorganize what it has already learned.

Your brain has a characteristic called neuroplasticity. Neuroplasticity is your brain’s ability to change and adapt the way it functions. This means that your mind is able to toss out things it’s absorbed that no longer serve your well-being. Through emotional corrective experiences, like some of the self-care tips you’ll explore in these pages, your brain can reroute you to a healthier way of thinking, and therefore living. This is so important for you. It. Is. Necessary. You can shake off your past, the old ways of thinking that have kept your mind captive, and chase after your own emotional wellness. Change the narrative of your life with self-love, and take on practices that purify and free your thoughts. Liberate your mind.

Physical Self-Care

The next area of focus for self-care is your physical health—the body. Your brain is not the only thing that remembers everything you experience in life. Your body also has its own memory bank. Good and bad emotions are stored in your body, especially unprocessed trauma. Your body also has a reaction to these different emotions. You might freeze when you get scared. You might get a headache when you’re irritated. You might lose your appetite when you’re feeling depressed. Taking care of your body requires you to listen to it and move it. You need to pay attention to what that physical temple of yours is asking for. Is it nourishment? Is it pampering? Is it stillness? Is it action?

Truly, moving your body is one of the best ways to take care of it. Things like stress and anxiety can paralyze us, creating bad habits that exacerbate whatever illnesses are trying to take root in our bodies. And as a strong Black woman, you may have been taught to ignore your physical pains, to disregard what your body is trying to tell you. Well, that stops here. It’s time to give your body the love and respect it deserves.

Spiritual Self-Care

The last focus of self-care is your spiritual health—your soul. This is the essence of who you are on the inside. Tending to your spiritual life doesn’t necessarily mean practicing religion. It can include your faith, but it’s about taking care of your inner being, your higher self—who is connected to the universe around it. Soul self-care encompasses activities that help you tap deeper into parts of you beyond your mind and body, like your intuition. Taking care of your spirit is what helps keep you motivated to pursue total healing. You will feel more connected to the world and humanity. This self-love practice guides you to your life’s purpose. It helps you walk and live in that fulfillment. It’s what fills you up with peace beyond understanding.

Self-care for your soul is essential. The more you take care of your soul, the more you get comfortable with who you are as a person. The world around you is always trying to tell you who you should be or what you should look like as a Black woman. Your consciousness gets clouded by the stress and trauma from attempting to just be. In most spaces, you aren’t allowed to be your full self. Spiritual self-care is where you get to unabashedly tap into the magic being inside of you. You get to say hello to her and get to know her intimately. Love gently on your soul, so it can be the guiding light you need.

Choose Yourself

Ultimately, self-care is healing work for your entire being.