Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

When he opened his eyes all he saw was a blinding light. Was he in the hospital? The last thing he remembered he was headed out for the night. His bodyguards were on his car’s tail, so he thought he’d have some fun and lose them. Did he wreck? His mother was going to kill him. She was always on him about the way he drove. He usually drove the speed limit and safely, especially if he had Wille in the car with him. But his little brother had found something for him to like better than spending the weekend with his brother.

Maybe it would lighten the kid up some. He knew what everyone thought about Wille. That he was some party prince and didn’t care about rules. That was true to a point. Mostly Wille just wanted to be normal. Erik loved attention, he couldn’t get enough of it. Sure, he’d rather it not be for being a prince. Maybe an actor or a rock star. Wille somehow still had a belief that just because he wasn’t crown prince people wouldn’t care about what he did. That was the furthest thing. They may not be the Brits so obsessed with propriety, but the Royal family still meant something here.

“You’re awake. I was afraid you would miss the show?” a voice said.

Erik sat up, he’s vision clearing. There was a beautiful…person. He couldn’t tell if it was a woman or man, but he guessed that didn’t matter because it was clearly an angel.

“Did I die?”

“Yes,” the voice said smoothly. “Do not worry, you died on impact.”

Somehow that didn’t make him feel any better.

“Where am I? Is this heaven?” He looked around and it reminded him of the tv room when he first went away to school after Hillerska. There was even a large tv and a comfy looking couch.

“No, this is just the in between. You have a decision to make.”

“What decision?”

“You weren’t supposed to die, that was our bad. So, for this once in a lifetime opportunity, you can choose to go into the afterlife or go back to before you died.”

“Am I going,” he said and pointed up, “or,” then he pointed down.

“That I can not tell you. You have to make the decision on your own without that information. But as a help we’ll show you the first year you’ve been gone in highlight form, of course.”

“What do you mean?”

“Sit. Watch with me. You already missed your mother finding out about your death, she fainted. She’s just about to call your little brother and let him know.”

“She fainted? Wille?”

“Come and sit, this is part is very intense,” the angel said with almost a gleeful tone.

Unable to think, he did what was told of him. He sat down and his jaw dropped as he saw his little brother. He was sitting on a windowsill at Hillerska, Erik recognized it. It looked like he was waiting for someone.

A boy with dark curls came into view. Erik recognized him too, but it took a moment to place him. It was the boy in the choir, the one that Vincent, August’s friend, was mocking. The two traded heys and Wille looked pensive.

“August is staying this weekend. I heard him talk about it, and now he’s gonna be on my ass,” Wille said. The other boy sighed looking a mix between annoyed and disappointed. “So, what do you think?”

“That I won’t be able to stay here.”

Why would he be staying there? Erik didn’t know Wille had made any close friends yet especially one that didn’t live at the school.

Wille’s phone vibrated in his pocket but after looking he dismissed the call. Was that about him? Were they telling him that he had died? He wasn’t sure he wanted to watch this.

Chapter Text

“Are they…flirting?” Erik asked the angel as he watched Wille and the other boy.

“I do believe they are. Your brother seems very smitten with that boy.”

“Dammit,” Erik groaned.

“What? Upset your little brother likes a boy?”

“No but it’s not going to be easy. Why can’t he just not make waves.”

“Oh, look, they’re leaving together. They look so happy.”

On screen Erik sees Boris the school psychologist as he comes out, yelling for Wille.

“This is it, huh?” he asked the angel. “What should I call you? Are you like an archangel or something?”

The angel laughed. “You really think a lot of yourself don’t you? No. I’m not an angel of heaven or hell. I’m the angel of the in between.”

“There’s not an angel of the in between,” he said.

“Funny, because I think I would know more than you. Oh, this is my favorite part,” the angel said, pointing to the tv. On screen, Wille was just handed the phone by Anette.

Knowing that that one phone call was going to destroy his little brother broke something in Erik.

 Erik tried to protect Wille from what he could. Taking the blame for broken vases and making sure that Wille studied. While he knew their parents loved Wille, he got the short end of the stick a lot. Being second born was pretty much like being tenth born in royal families.

“Wilhelm speaking,” Wille answered the phone.

“Wilhelm. It’s your mother.”

The screen had a close up of Wille’s face, it was like it was for dramatic effect.

“Are you kidding me? You are showing me this like it’s a real show?” Erik was indignant.

“Well, how else do you expect me to watch the lives of you little people. Like ants? No, thank you. I like to see the emotion on the faces.”

Erik looked back at the tv.

“Hey. What’s going on?” Wille asked.

Erik heard the confusion in his little brother’s voice. Then the devastation in his mother’s when she started to speak again.

“Hey, what’s with the shot of him away from the phone but I can clearly hear he is still on the phone.”

“It all happened, why does it matter in what order. You really are being a buzzkill. Watch, she’s fixing to tell him you’re dead.”

“You were a lot more nicer when I woke up.”

“You were still shaking off the ozone, you’re fine. Watch.”

Back on screen was Wille with the phone. Their mother’s voice was coming clearly through the phone.

“He was going too fast and lost control.”

Erik saw the moment his brother knew he was dead even before their mother said the words.

“What?” Wille said.

“Let me go back. Let me go back now,” Erik demanded, jumping up.

“Not until the end of the year. Trust me, it’s a show you don’t want to miss.”

“He’s hurting,” Erik said, looking at Wille.

“Life hurts.”

Chapter Text

“It’s already started,” Erik said more to himself than to the angel.

“What has?” the angel asked.

“He’s all alone. Mom and Dad have each other to comfort them, but who does Wille have? They haven’t even seen him yet, and he’s been home for two hours.”

Erik was looking at Wilhelm sitting on his bed. It worried him that his little brother wasn’t crying. Wille was the emotional one. He cried hard, or he yelled. But lately, since he became a teenager, he’d been bottling things up. Erik knew he was partly to blame for that. He remembered telling Wille once that it didn’t matter what he felt inside; it was what people saw on the outside that mattered.

On the screen, Wille got up off his bed and went over to his dresser, grabbing his cell phone.
Now the screen was showing Wille’s phone screen.

“Are there cameras in my brother’s room?” Erik asked.

“No, that would be an invasion of privacy.”

“Then how can we see him and what’s on his screen?”

“What part of ‘angel’ don’t you get?”

“The part where you never actually gave me a name.”

Erik was sure this was an angel—at first. But would an angel really get glee from someone’s agony?

“Caught me. Alright, I’m not an angel. More like a gatekeeper.”

“Like Saint Peter? Or Cerberus?”

“Yeah, something like that. Let’s continue. It’s time for your funeral.” That was a vague answer.

As Erik looked back at the screen, he felt a pang in his chest as it flickered to his funeral service. It wasn’t like he thought it would be. Mostly because he actually never thought of his funeral. He was only twenty-one years old. That was nothing. Why had he been driving so recklessly? He looked at his mother, the strong woman, who now looked so upset. Not even when his grandfather died did she cry. Maybe both he and his mother had been teaching Wille wrong. But she was crying now. His father looked tired and barely holding on. Wille looked…broken.

“Hey, kid,” he said to the TV, knowing Wille couldn’t hear him but continuing anyway. “I know this is hard, but you’re stronger than you think. You stood up to the Queen of Sweden when you didn’t want to eat your vegetables at five years old. That’s strong.”

“Or very foolish,” the not-angel said.

“That’s my brother for you. Strong and foolish. I need to call you something. Give me a name.”

“Just call me Lura.”

“Fool. Fitting. I guess it’ll do.”

Erik looked back at the screen, and now his family was sitting down to eat in their living quarters—a table and chairs just big enough for the four of them. A tradition his grandfather started. Dinners, when not entertaining, should be small and private. The cook would bring the food up, and they would serve themselves.

While his mother spoke to Wille, she wasn’t really asking. She was telling him.

“Ever since I was born, I knew I would inherit the Crown from Dad. But I had time to adjust and adapt. And so did Erik.”

Had she not noticed Wille wasn’t even looking at her?

She continued. “But now it’s you and your future children who will succeed me.” That got a look from Wille. “So, it’s really important that you are a role model. No more mistakes, Wilhelm. And people will always compare you with Erik in every step you take.”

Great, she was laying the guilt on heavy.

“That’s already the case. It always has been,” Wille said, causing their mother to get upset and leave. Not a moment later, their father got up and went after her, leaving his little brother all alone… again.

“She seems nice,” Lura said sarcastically. Gone was the ethereal vibe Lura had when pretending to be an angel.

“Her son just died.”

“You mean you just died.”

Erik blinked. “Yeah.”

“It happens. Once you leave your body, it gets harder to think of it as yours.”

“Does that mean I’ll start to stop caring for them?”

“No, it means you’ll care more. No longer will you have selfish desires; now, all you’ll want is their happiness or whatever you want for them.”

He looked back at the screen, and now it had jumped to Wille traveling back to school. Their parents weren’t dropping him off; no surprise there.

“I still think of them as our parents, so why don’t I still consider myself their son?” Erik asked as the thought occurred to him.

“Your attachment is stronger with your brother than your parents. So, if they are his parents, they are yours too.”

“Oh.”

Back on screen, Hillerska came into view, and he watched Wille visibly tense.

“You got this,” Erik said, watching Wille grow more and more tense.

Erik turned to Lura. “The kid, the curly-haired boy…Wille has him, though. He’ll have someone to talk to. I should have told him I saw and talked to Boris; then he’d think to go. I was so ashamed that I needed help, though. Why didn’t I?”

“Because he saw you as his hero, and you didn’t want to let him know you were just a mere mortal,” Lura said.

“I liked being his hero. I could do no wrong. Even when I was hard on him, he still loved me.”

“It’s an addicting feeling.”

“You know, I wanted him to have the experiences I had at school. Making friends and playing sports but—”

“But…?” Lura asked.

“But he’s not me. We’ve always been so different, but that was never a problem. There was no jealousy over me being crown prince; even when he was little, he didn’t want it. He always looked at our lives as some kind of prison, I guess. And it could be—I admit that. I couldn’t go out like my friends and get lost in the crowd. I’ve had bodyguards with me forever. The only time I was ever truly alone was in my car. Something I’m glad for because I would have hated if I killed someone else.”

Erik's gaze remained fixed on the screen as Wille walked through the familiar halls of Hillerska, his face carefully blank. That was until he neared the girl Erik had seen when he first dropped Wille off—Felice, he believed her name was. Wille and she hugged. He was glad; Wille was a tactile person, he needed touch. It used to embarrass Erik, but now he would give anything to be able to hug him again.

Then Erik saw August’s face. “What’s wrong with him?” August ever-so-lightly pulled Felice back from Wille. That was odd.

“I wouldn’t want to spoil the ending.”

Erik ignored him and his weird foreboding way.

Now it was August and Wille facing each other, August resting his forehead against Wille’s. Maybe he remembered how much Wille needed to feel. It was a nice moment.

“I’m glad he has August,” Erik said.

“Are you?” Lura said. Erik looked at him and saw mirth dancing behind his eyes.

“Shouldn’t I?”

Lura shrugged and looked back at the screen. This had to be the strangest afterlife. He knew it couldn’t be a dream; he wasn’t that imaginative.

Wille then walked into the chapel and took a seat in the front. Erik could see him clutching the piece of paper in his hands. One of the advisors—probably Farima—had written it, he knew. They never trusted Wille to go off-script after the “tree cutting” incident.

The choir came in, and Erik noticed the curly-haired boy looking at Wille, with Wille looking back in what could only be called pain. The choir started singing, and Erik’s eyes fell on the boy with curly hair again, who was watching Wille with concern. The boy must be the best singer because, just like before, he had a solo. He liked this song, it was his favorite. The boy did good by it.

Wille would look at him and then back down. He looked so lost…so alone.

Once the song ended, it was Wille’s time to speak.

“I can’t; I need a break,” Erik said, standing up.

“I guess I could pause.”

“You can do that? Why did you insist I was going to miss something?”

Lura shrugged. “What can I say? I’m whimsical.”

Erik walked away, knowing that as soon as he heard his brother say more than a few words, he was going to break. He needed to compose himself first.

Chapter Text

Erik finally was able to get his bearings and headed back to the couch and Lura. But on screen wasn’t Wille in front of the kids at school anymore. Instead, Erik was looking at himself driving his car with Wille beside him, looking miserable. Had he actually been that miserable then?

“What is this?”

“I accidentally hit rewind,” Lura said, with a sneaky smile.

“Well, fast-forward back to where it was.”

“Can’t. Just like some streaming services, I can rewind but not fast-forward. We’re going to have to watch it through. Hey, at least you know what’s going to happen.”

“I really don’t like you.”

“I’ll live. You won’t…maybe, we haven’t gotten to that part yet.” Lura patted the spot beside them. “Sit here.”

Erik sat down and looked at the TV. He wanted to get this over with.

On the screen, Erik pulled in and shut off his car, the same car that he died in not a month later. He watched himself excitedly exit his car and greet the headmistress and August. But this time, he noticed what he missed the first time around. Wille’s face and his discomfort introducing himself. Even interacting with August, who he already knew, he looked uncomfortable. Sure, August and his mother didn’t come around much, but Wille did know him. Then another boy joined them; Erik couldn’t remember his name.

August introduced him as Alexander and rattled off his father’s company. That was August, always about who someone was. He couldn’t blame him; he was the same way, he was just nicer about it than August. August continued to lord over the boy, Alexander.

“Ugh, I remember this. That damn suitcase,” he said to Lura.

“Why couldn’t Wilhelm carry his own suitcase?” Lura asked curiously as they watched Wille and August tussle over it.

“It’s not proper.”

“Does Wilhelm not know that?” Lura asked.

“Of course he knows.”

“So why would he be doing that if he knows it’s not proper?”

“To be difficult.” Then he looked at Wille, really looked at him. “Because he wanted something to hold onto. Because he was spinning and needed something to ground him. Because it was his and it was only thing in this new world that is just his.” He had forgotten what it was like to be new there. He had been excited but scared. He should have made the transition easier for Wille.

“I was mad at him,” Erik said.

“What?” Lura asked, looking actually surprised.

“I was mad at him. I thought he was being selfish.”

Erik watched as he shook hands and smiled at the camera, then he watched Wille shake hands, no smile in sight, well no real smile. He was polite, but he wasn’t comfortable.

Now they were in the chapel; the choir came in. Wille waved at the girl. He had some back-and-forth banter with August, but it was Wille he watched. He saw how uncomfortable Wille was by August’s remark about laying the foundation while they’re still too insecure to object. He didn’t know why he laughed, probably the same reason he did a lot of things. It was expected of him. Wille didn’t laugh, though; he actually looked at August with something akin to shock and disgust.

Soon all that was forgotten as the choir started to sing. There the curly-haired boy was. Vincent said his bit about being louder, and the boy started singing louder…prouder. The weird camera he was watching from kept going from Wille to the boy and back again.

“He’s smiling. Wille is actually smiling,” Erik said. “So it was that fast?”

“It’s just a smile,” Lura said. But Erik knew that was a real smile from his brother and it was almost never seen.

Now on screen were Wille and him getting pictures taken.

“He doesn’t look like he’s having fun,” Lura said.

“Wille’s always hated having his picture taken.”

The Erik on screen leaned over and whispered in Wille’s ear, “We run on three.”

“That doesn’t seem like princely behavior,” Lura said as they watched himself and Wille run, falling down in the process. Ivan, his bodyguard, running to keep up.

“Sometimes you have to do the unexpected, or you go crazy.”

“So that was for you, not Wille?”

“It was for us both.”

The scene changed, and now he was looking at August and his friends.

“Why are we following August?”

“He means something to you too, does he not?”

“Yeah, I hope he’s not too hard on himself; he has a tendency to do that. I’m glad they have each other. August will need Wille as much as Wille needs August.”

“You really trust August to help Wille?” Lura asked with something odd in his tone.

Erik looked over at Lura. “Of course, August is family, and he knows how much I worry about Wille. Why? You already seem to know what we’re going to see. Does August do something to Wille?”

“I will not give spoilers, I just hate that. Let’s watch some more.” He mimicked zipping his lips closed.

On screen, August was arguing with his friends about something, so Erik started to pay attention.

“It didn’t occur to you they’d search the place before the prince arrived?” August said.

“We can’t get anything in?” August’s friend Vincent replied. “The security service has scared the staff. I needed a doctor’s note just to bring my medication in.”

“Fucking unbelievable. I promised Erik to take care of Wille. I want to give him the wildest initiation ever,” August said.

“What? Initiations are done the first week; Wille is starting a month in. Giving an initiation to just one at a time is… weird,” Erik said. He also didn’t care for August’s tone when he said, “wildest initiation ever.”

“Maybe he just wants to include your brother,” Lura said.

“Maybe, but Wille doesn’t really stand up for himself. To Mom he does, but he usually backs down like with going to Hillerska.”

“Really? A prince lets people walk all over him? Maybe he just hasn’t had a reason to stand up for himself yet.”

“Is something going to happen to Wille at the initiation?” Erik demanded.

“I said no spoilers.”

Back on screen was now Wille and himself in Wille’s room. His brother didn’t seem to realize what an honor it was to get a room to himself as a first year. And he didn’t do anything to earn it, just throwing a fit and getting into a fight that sent him there.

“Wille has no idea how easy he has it as second born.” He has no idea what it’s like to be crown prince.”

“Had.”

Erik looked back at Lura. “What?”

“He had no idea, but you’re dead. That means not only does he get the joy of being thrown into a role he never expected, he has to deal with grief. You humans really are strange.”

“Strange how?”

Lura just shrugged. “Just strange.”

Looking back on the screen, he saw Wille look so lost and angry.
“I won’t survive three years here, Erik,” Wille said.
He’s so overdramatic sometimes, Erik thought to himself.
The Erik on screen smiled and threw the booklet to Wille. “Copy the first years and listen to the third years.”
“You mean do what August tells me? He’s so fucking annoying.”

“August is family. You can trust him like a brother.”

What followed was some yelling between them that Erik regretted now. How had he not noticed Wille rubbing his chest? He should have tried to see it from Wille’s side. Erik couldn’t wait to leave home and go to Hillerska. Wille had always been shyer and more withdrawn than him.

“Why does he grab you like that?” Lura asked.

Erik had taken his eyes off the screen for a moment. Looking back, he saw that he was trying to leave and Wille had locked his arms around him. Something Wille used to do to Erik’s leg when he was much smaller when he didn’t want him to leave. Then Erik saw what he hadn’t seen before because he was walking away. Wille alone in the hallway, he looked so lonely.

“Why are we following the curly-haired boy? I don’t know him,” Erik said as he watched the boy open his locker.

“I just thought this show could use some diversity.”

“Really?” Erik asked Lura unbelievingly.

“No, not really. He’s important to the whole picture. Just watch.”

On screen, August was running to catch up with the boy. After an awkward introduction where the boy didn’t slow down, August started questioning him about contacts.

“August, you idiot. I swear to God if you get Wille drunk his first night, I’m going to haunt you.”

Lura made a noise, and Erik looked over. “What?”

“Nothing. I love sweepstakes week.”

Chapter Text

Erik went through some weird moments, sad moments, and just plain boring moments. He watched the girl, Felice, touch herself to a random Instagram picture of his brother. When he asked Lura what the point was in showing him that, all Lura did was laugh. Then he watched the curly-haired boy have dinner with his family. Truthfully, Erik let his mind drift while they were on screen—what did this have to do with Wille? He didn’t have to watch every stranger’s family dinner, did he?

Then he watched August rib Wille a little. His brother handled it well and just went on to sit with the first years. Then two first years tried the “agree with everything Wille said” thing. Erik almost laughed at their attempts to impress him. That is not a way to win my little brother over, he thought.

Next, there was his little brother, texting their mother and asking to go home. Erik let out a sigh. He could have told Wille that was a lost cause. Once Mom sets her mind on something, there’s no stopping her, he thought. You’re better off asking the sun to rise in the west. There was another scene of the curly-haired boy talking to his friend and playing a video game—it looked like one he and Wille had played together once. What’s with this guy? Why’s he so important? Erik found his attention drifting again.

Then it showed the same boy making some sort of agreement with August. Erik’s brows furrowed. What does August want with him? Then the scene cut to Wille in class, looking visibly uncomfortable. Erik felt a pang of sympathy. He’d always hated those classroom politics debates too—where you weren’t allowed an opinion, not really. At least, not one you were allowed to share.

“I like him,” Lura said suddenly, interrupting Erik’s thoughts. “He’s got fire.”

Erik, who had let his mind drift again, snapped his attention back to the screen. The curly-haired boy was arguing with one of the yes-boys. Erik’s attention honed in when he heard the boy look over at Wille and say something about the royal family being the biggest welfare receivers.

“Was that a dig at us?” Erik asked, his tone incredulous. He leaned forward, squinting at the boy on screen. “He just said we’re the biggest welfare receivers, didn’t he? The gall.”

“That really got you, didn’t it?” Lura asked, barely hiding a smirk.

“We do a service,” Erik replied defensively, straightening up. More than that boy knows.

Lura looked at him, and then a laugh escaped before they doubled over, laughing harder and harder. It wasn’t cute. Finally, when Lura could catch their breath, they looked back at Erik, wiping their eyes. “Oh, you buy into the whole royalty ‘our blood is better than yours’ thing. Still?”

Erik clenched his jaw. “That’s not what I said. You may not know this because you’re a…whatever you are, but the royal family does a lot.”

“Oh, I’m sure,” Lura replied, an eyebrow raised. “The royal family of Sweden does a lot? What has Sweden really given the world anyway? ABBA and IKEA?”

“A lot more than that.”

Lura continued, nonchalant. “Oh, and that tradition when you crown the May Queen and kill the boyfriend.”

“That was a movie, a bad one at that,” Erik shot back. “Midsummer is actually a very beautiful tradition. It’s about celebrating the light, family, community—”

“So is mummification,” Lura interrupted with a smirk, “but that doesn’t mean it should be continued.”

Erik couldn’t help but let out a dry chuckle, shaking his head. “Let’s get back to Wille.”

He looked back at the screen, but his heart sank at the sight before him—Wille’s initiation. Not the spit. Not the spit. Erik grimaced. Gross.

“Gross,” Lura echoed with a look of disdain. “You humans are savages.”

Erik couldn’t really argue there. “Fair enough,” he mumbled. “But it was supposed to get worse…” he trailed off, frowning at the screen. Why didn’t they finish it?

“They didn’t do the whole initiation,” he said aloud, mostly to himself.

“What do you mean?” Lura asked, sounding genuinely curious for once.

“There’s a part that was started by some guy in the nineties. It wasn’t good, but we never stopped it. I guess maybe they didn’t do it to Wille because he was by himself,” Erik said, almost relieved.

Lura tilted their head, arching a brow. “Are you referring to the part where they strip them down and make them watch a gay porn video while taunting them with slurs?”

“When you say it like that, it sounds worse than it was.”

“Sounds pretty bad. Are you saying you wanted that to happen to Wille?”

Erik bristled, searching for a response. “No…but it’s tradition.”

Lura rolled their eyes. “You’re going to get your eyes so opened during this year. You humans cling to the strangest things. And just so you know, that part happened to none of the first years this year.”

Back to the screen, the scene had shifted to the initiation after-party. August and Wille were sitting together, with August chatting away, seemingly in his element. Erik’s face tightened as he listened.

“Your only mistake that night was being around the wrong people. I get that you wanted to feel normal, go to an ordinary school, meet ordinary girls, and go to ordinary parties. But how did that work out?” August said to Wille, making his little brother visibly uncomfortable. “Ordinary people will never accept you as one of them.”

“He’s not wrong,” Erik muttered, though something about August’s tone grated on him.

August continued. “Here, you’re among equals. We could murder someone, and no one would say a word.”

Erik’s eyes widened. “What the fuck?” He looked at Lura, then back at the screen, incredulous. He watched his little brother laugh, and it didn’t make him feel better. Not in the slightest.

“Come on,” Wille said in a breath.

“I swear,” August replied, his tone serious. Wille’s laughter faded, replaced by a look of discomfort.

“What the hell, August?” Erik growled at the screen.

“That not the lesson you wanted him to teach your brother?” Lura asked, almost mockingly.

“Hardly,” Erik spat, still staring at the screen, his anger barely contained.

“Looks like your brother isn’t paying attention to August anymore,” Lura noted, their tone a little too amused.

Erik looked back at the screen to see Wille, drink in hand, glancing over at the curly-haired boy who had just walked in with his sister. Erik raised a brow, noticing the look on Wille’s face.

Then came the inevitable scene of his brother getting drunk. Erik sighed. “Great. Our parents sent him away to stay out of trouble, and now he’s drinking like a fish.”

“But you knew this was going to happen, didn’t you?” Lura asked, giving him a sidelong glance.

“Yes, I knew. I just hoped he had more sense than I did at sixteen,” Erik said, though he could already tell from Lura’s expression that his answer wasn’t going to satisfy them.

Lura giggled. “Seems like he’s following in your footsteps quite well.” They leaned back, giving Erik a smug look. “Maybe it’s not Wille’s sense you should be questioning, hmm?”

Erik bristled. “I’m questioning August’s influence more than Wille’s sense,” he replied, though he couldn’t shake the feeling that Lura was hinting at something.

He watched his brother zero in on the curly haired boy. Erik recognized the look in his brother’s eyes. It was the same look he got when their father let him pick out a pet and name it. Succubus was with them for ten years, only dying last year. It broke Wille’s heart and to this day their parents didn’t know where their four year old learned the word Succubus. Wille always listened to him and it was so funny watching his mother’s head almost explode while Wille through a fit that the Succubus was the name and nothing else. Erik had found the word in a dirty limerick that his father had read to one of his mother’s bodyguards.

“Your brother named his pet Succubus?” Lura asked.

“I didn’t say that out loud, how do you know?”

“No secrets here. Why didn’t he tell your mother that you told him the word?”

“Because he never told on me, just like I never told on him.”

“What was Succubus?”

“An Axolotl.”

“Interesting. You know what else is interesting, your brother chasing after that curly haired boy.”

Erik looked back at the screen and watched his little brother chasing after the curly haired boy, Lura was right.

“I was about to go outside. Wanna come?” Wille asked the boy.

He watched them climb out of a window he had climbed out hundreds of times. God, he missed going there. It was the only time he felt like he was free. Free-ish. Somewhere his mother wasn’t always breathing down his neck, his father wasn’t always…well, his father never really had much time for him. But it was still a freeing experience.

Wille and the curly haired boy talk about the curly haired boy’s sister whose name is Sara apparently and the girl Felice as they wondered off drunk together. It wasn’t good for anyone to wander off while drunk. In the woods you could get turned around and wind up in town. That would be really bad for the school. And with first years they are so young and naïve they could be hurt. Not all boys at that school were good.

“They’ll be fine. They make it back to the school without any harm,” Lura said. “It’s good that you worried about them.”

“I don’t like this reading my mind. But I’m glad they’re okay.”

They looked back at the screen. Wille and the curly haired boy were now sitting, hidden from everyone else.

“Oh, that’s nice, he’s drunk singing to the real singer. That must be why he wanted him to come outside with him,” Lura said, a little snidely.

“He’s having fun, leave him alone,” Erik told him.

On screen his brother was looking at the curly haired boy very intensely. Erik sighed when Wille grabbed the curly haired boy and keep August and his friends from seeing them.

“He likes him, like really,” Erik said.

“Yeah, on first sight,” Lura said.

On screen Wille was staring at the boy and the boy was staring back.

“Fine, I guess I need to learn the boy’s name. What is it?” Erik asked. Wille had a hard year in front of him, might as well have a distraction.

There was a giggle beside him. “Well, that distraction’s name is Simon, and you have no idea what’s headed their way.”

Chapter Text

“The next episode is coming on,” Lura said. Erik had taken a break and stretched his legs.

“Calling them episodes now?”

“What would you call them?”

“Fine, episodes it is.” Erik looked at the screen and saw kids pounding on the tables and chanting. He always hated this but played along because it’s just what you do. “Oh god.” They were chanting Wille’s name.

“Not something Wille would enjoy?”

“Being the center of attention? No, not at all, more like his worst nightmare. You know those animals that play dead when they are scared.”

“Opossums?”

“Yeah, he’s like that.”

“You didn’t know what an opossum was called?”

“There are 335 different species of marsupials. Am I supposed to know the name of all of them?”

“That is weirdly specific.”

“My best subject was life science. When I was little I wanted to be a veterinarian.”

“Not a king?”

Erik didn’t want to talk about that. None of that. It was a long time ago and didn’t matter.

“You really do believe what you wanted didn’t matter.”

“Our lives were never our own.” Once he said it he realized how messed up it was. These were thoughts he only talked to Boris about. “But it’s for the greater good. We mean something. Let’s get back to watching teens get stupider.”

He looked back at the screen just in time for the housemaster to come in and quieten everyone. He saw Wille let out a relieved breath and sneak a peek at Simon. What had happened the night before? He wondered.

“Nothing. I was very disappointed,” Lura said reading Erik’s mind again.

“You can’t actually want something to happen between Wille and Simon.”

“Um…yeah, why else would I be here.”

“FOR ME!”

“Someone’s turning his own death into the all about him show.”

Erik sighed hard. “Anyway, when do I get to see my parents again?”

“When they contact your brother we will see them. Since you’re still alive as it stands on screen, never. They pretty much leave it to you to check on him, right?”

“They’re busy,” he defended his parents.

“Yeah.”

Erik looked away from Lura’s piercing look. Back on screen the kids were outside. It was a nice day, and everyone was just lounging around in the sun.

“Is he trying to look cool?” Lura asked.

“No, he doesn’t want people to talk to him, he’s trying to be unapproachable.”

“That’s kind of a jerk move.”

“You haven’t had a conversation with my brother while he’s looking at you with his wide owl eyes. Knowing he’s thinking about throwing himself off a mountain to get out of the simplest conversation.”

Wille stood up and started walking towards the east building, it housed math, science and geography classrooms.

As he was walking past the girl Felice and her friends, the girl got up to follow. She caught up with Wille and started talking. August then caught up with them.

“Oh, this is sad. Don’t be so desperate August,” Erik said to his cousin, even though he couldn’t hear him.

Wille left the group that now included the two girls that were with the Felice girl. It was uncomfortable to watch. He always thought August had more game than that but he guessed not.

Just when he thought it couldn’t get any worse he watched Wille try and talk to Simon but lose his nerve.

“He’s going to die a virgin,” Erik said covering his face momentarily watching his brother cower out of talking to someone he likes.

“Looks like he’s going to try and talk again,” Lura said.

“They pay for private tutoring before the tests,” Wille whispered to Simon. The boy had just gotten a low grade on a text and the yes-boys had aced it.

“What?” Simon asked.

“They were revising with the teacher last weekend,” Wille said.

“Did you ever need help from the teacher like that?” Lura asked.

“No, I didn’t need it.”

“That smart?”

“Yeah and I was always graded more gently than the others.”

“You think that is fair?” Lura asked.

“That’s the world we live in.”

“So is Wilhelm smart or is he going to have to rely on help from the teacher?” Lura asked, sounding a bit annoyed.

“Wille is smart but lacks focus and ambition. He doesn’t care about grades, he doesn’t care about school. That has always been true. When he started school he would throw fits every morning because he didn’t want to go. It would drive Helga crazy.”

“And who is Helga?”

“She was Wille’s nanny. When she died, I didn’t think he would ever get over it.”

“His nanny died?”

“She was very old. She had been my mother’s nanny.”

“Was she yours?”

“No.”

“Is that normal?”

“For the kids to have different nannies? Yeah. But for one to be our mother’s former nanny? No.”

“Then why was she?”

“Don’t know if you’ve noticed but Wille is a bit clingy. My mother hired her old nanny because she didn’t want someone leaving to get married or have kids. Helga already raised her family. My mother didn’t count on her dying when Wille was seven and definitely didn’t count on her dying in front of him. After that he was terrified to let anyone of us out of his sight. Even Jan-Olof couldn’t leave without telling Wille where he was going and when he would be back.”  

“I’m sure a good child psychologist would have helped,” Lura said.

“That would run the risk of someone finding out that he needed mental health help.”

“Isn’t that a good thing?” Lura asked.

“You would think. I was only a kid myself, it’s not like I got a say. My parents did the best they could. My mother’s parents were cold and distant to her, so she tries to be better. My father was raised by his abusive parents and he’s so scared that he’ll be the same, he has as little to do with us as possible. They’re not great but they try to be better than they had and they are.”

When Erik started watching again it had moved on from that scene. Now Wille was on his bed scrolling Simon’s Instagram. Erik shook his head, this was embarrassing.

There was a knock and then the door immediately opened giving no time to respond. It was August. He came in and started being annoying. Erik was glad he had bodyguards outside his room, August could be a bit…overbearing.

“Shit. Sorry,” August said, holding his hand up. “I didn’t see anything.”

“Idiot,” Erik said, annoyed on Wille’s behalf. It was rude to come in the room without permission and even ruder to make comments alluding to private acts. And it was weird since all his brother had been doing was being weird and a little stalkery by going through a boy he’s barely talked to’s Instagram.

Then August continued to talk and got more and more gross. He wouldn’t have dared speak to Erik like that.

“Then why does he speak to Wilhelm like that?” Lura asked, his voice a bit muffled.

Erik looked over at him and noticed he had something new.

“Why do you have popcorn? Where did you get popcorn?”

“What? They were showing pizza a bit ago and I got peckish.”

“Pizza? When was there pizza on screen?”

“A little bit ago but you were looking at nothing and had your tongue out a little so you were probably trying to think.”

“Shut up. And he’s doing it to Wille but wouldn’t dare do it to me is because Wille is younger.”

Erik looked back to the screen ignoring the noise Lura made at his statement.

Now on screen he saw that he was calling Wille. He remembered this, August answered. And just like he thought, August answered the phone.

“How are things?” Erik heard himself ask August.

“Fine,” August answered, his smile huge. But the camera then showed Wille on his bed looking annoyed as August kept talking, putting Wille down as he went. Erik hadn’t been in the room at the time so he didn’t see how distressed Wille had looked while trying to get his phone back. Erik thought it was funny at the time but now it just seemed invasive of August to do.

After some back and forth and August putting Wille down again, he finally handed the phone over. Then Erik heard himself defend August again and excuse the reason August was like that.

But as Wille looked out the window, his brother’s demeanor changed. He had wondered why he got off the phone in such a rush to go to training. It was the boy, Simon in the group that had Wille’s attention. Really, his brother needed to play a little hard to get.

His mind drifted off again and when he started paying attention it was now on August trying to get Boris to believe he had ADHD. Had Erik been so consumed with himself that he missed that August had a problem with that medication? An addiction and he didn’t see it. Wow, he was really self absorbed when he was alive.

“Don’t be so hard on yourself. If someone is hiding something from you, you’re not to blame for not noticing it,” Lura said.

“You’re actually saying something nice to me?”

“Don’t get used to it. Look at the screen, shouldn’t he be studying?”

On screen now was Wille in his room sitting on his desk chair looking at his phone. Erik noticed he was typing something. Wille was asking someone why they weren’t coming to rowing practice. If someone wasn’t coming to rowing practice Erik would have kicked them off the crew, there was no excuse.

Wille nervously threw his phone down and was now practically biting his nails waiting for a response. Get it together, Wille. He couldn’t have people thinking his whole family was inept at getting someone.

The sound of a reply came through and Erik just knew it was going to be a mistake whatever it was.

Simon- A friend’s got a game. I promised I’d go. Tag along if you dare.

Wilhelm- August will freak out if I leave.

“And for good reason, not only is it a school night but he doesn’t have permission,” Erik said before stopping himself. “I just sounded like my mother.” He looked back at the screen. “Run, get out while you can.”

On screen there was a text back.

Simon- I get it. You’re too scared.

“He’s smiling at that,” Lura said, pointing to Wille on the screen.

“He would be smiling at that,” Erik said annoyed. Sometimes his brother didn’t have sense god gave a moth.

On screen there was a knock followed almost instantaneously with August opening the door.

“Hasn’t he ever heard of privacy?” Lura asked.

“Okay, even I have to admit this is annoying,” Erik conceded.

“Coming?” August asked Wille.

“Shit. I don’t think I can. I’m not feeling well.”

“Can I get you anything?” August asked.

“No, thanks. It’s okay. I’ll just have an early night. I don’t want to pass it on. I’ve got a sore throat.”

Then in a spectacularly bad job of faking a sore throat Wille swallowed and made a pained face.

“If August believes that, he’s a fool,” Lura said.

“Agreed,” Erik said.

“I can’t include you in the main team just like that if you don’t join the practice sessions,” August said looking angst.

“Wille doesn’t even care about crew, it wouldn’t be a big loss if he wasn’t on it. He wanted to take riding but I told him only girls do that at Hillerska,”

“Did he like riding?” Lura asked.

“Huh?” Erik had been watching Wille sneak out of school, going out the window of one of the other boy’s.

“Did Wilhelm like riding?”

“Oh, yeah, he was good too, won a lot of awards. He’s been riding since he was three.”

“That doesn’t make sense that you made him stop then.”

“I didn’t make him do anything. I just let him know, crew was better.”

“Are you good at riding?”

“Me? God, no, I hate it.”

“You do know that Wilhelm isn’t you right?”

Erik drowned Lura out, he didn’t want to hear him right now. At the moment on screen Wille was learning the embarrassing lesson of public transportation. It was a lesson he had to learn too.

Chapter Text

“You seem to be okay with your little brother liking a boy,” Lura said out of nowhere.

They were watching Wille be introduced to Simon’s friend at the football game.

“Everyone is allowed their own little secrets.”

“So, you’re saying Simon has to say a secret if Wilhelm wants something to do with him.”

“Look, Wille knows what is expected of him.”

“But he’s the second born. Shouldn’t that allow him some freedom?”

“I don’t make the rules.”

“No, but your mother does.”

“Just drop it.”

On screen Wille had just left to get hot dogs for Simon and him.

“Shit. The prince…What’s going on there?” Simon’s friend that Erik didn’t catch his name said. “Do you like him?”

“What? What do you mean?” Simon asked but looked very suspiciously coy.

“I can see it. Bro, you really like him.” Apparently the friend had also noticed the coyness.

“Shh. No, I don’t know.” Not a yes but not a real no.

“Boiled or grilled? He had to finish your sentence. What’s happening?” What’s happening is Wille is an idiot for asking that question. Always grilled, he had failed him as a brother. “You really like him.”

“Stop it! He’s coming.”

Then Erik watched as they cheered for a girl whose name was Rosh according to the chanting from them.

“He looks like he’s having fun,” Lura said.

Erik watched Wille smile, and he did seem to be having fun with them. Then he saw the boy Simon, record Wille.

“Why is he doing that?”

“Probably because he thought it was a fun memory to keep,” Lura said.

“No one ever does anything without ulterior motives.”

“Is that how you two were raised? No wonder you’re like the way you are.”

“What does that mean?” he demanded, looking at Lura.

“Nothing.”

 He turned back to the screen. “WHAT THE FUCK!”

He was watching Wille on the back of a motorbike with no helmet.

“It looks like fun,” Lura said.

“It’s dangerous. If he fell off he could have been seriously hurt.”

The screen cut to Wille gently knocking on a window.

“Alexander,” Wille called quietly.

The window opened and he climbed in.

“Look, he made it back fine,” Lura said. “Are you saying you didn’t do anything stupid in your time at school. And remember, you died speeding and driving carelessly.”

Erik glared at Lura and looked back at the tv. Wille was now trying to sneak back to his room, which is damn near impossible. August was in the lounge and Erik could tell he was waiting for something, Wille for sure.

As soon as Wille passed by, August looked in that direction.

“Was it educational?” August asked.

“Was what educational?” Lura asked.

“No clue, this is August.”

Wille knew he had been caught and turned around and faced his consequences. That was good, he knew he had been in the wrong.

“Hi. Sorry, I felt a bit better. I thought it would be okay to hang out with some friends,” Wille said.

Erik could see how pissed off August was and for good reason. August was the prefect, it was on him to make sure all the students were in on time. Not only that, Wille had told him a baldfaced lie.

“I asked if it was educational.” Yeah, August was seething. “Your socialist safari.” Wille looked properly chastised. “I’m sure you understand that I can’t just let this pass. You left the school area without permission. Everyone needs permission. You’ll take Alexander’s dinner duty for the rest of the week.”

Shockingly, Wille accepted it. “Okay.” Nodding his head.

“An apology might be in order,” August said, making Erik cringe. Now he was taking it too far. The kid snuck out, it wasn’t like he burned the boathouse down.

“Yeah, sorry,” Wille said, giving no attitude.

“What did you say?” August asked, now he was being ridiculous.

“Sorry,” Wille repeated.

Before Wille left after some more back and forth, August moved to face him.

“You should be careful of the company you keep. Especially if they’re using you to get some views.”

Then August proceeded to show Wille his phone that had a video of Wille cheering at the game on it. Simon had posted it on his Instagram.

“I knew he was up to something. That boy Simon can’t be trusted,” Erik said.

“It looks like he was just sharing a video of his friend,” Lura said.

“Shows what you know. Everyone wants something.”

“You lived a very sad life,” Lura said, no mirth in his tone this time.

“The joy of being born a prince,” he said annoyed that Lura was judging him and his family. “It may not have been fun, but we mean something.”

On the screen jumped to a girl, Simon’s sister if he remembered. Then Simon came in and confirmed that yes, it was his sister.

The boy was giggly and seemed to be floating on air.

“I think he likes Wille back,” Lura said happily.

“That’s not the good news you think it is,” Erik said.

“Why? Your brother likes someone, and they like him back.”

“Because it’ll hurt him that much more when he has to break it off. If the boy didn’t like him back, then it would never happen anyway. But now he’ll have this thought about what could have happened.”

“You are so sure they can’t be together.”

“You say I die, I believe you. That means there is no way the royal court will allow their brand new crown prince to have a boyfriend.”

“That would be fine and all except for one thing,” Lura said.

“What?”

“Wilhelm is not you. I think you’re going to be surprised how not like you he is.”

“I know he’s not like me. But he knows he has a responsibility to the people of Sweden. It’s not about him.”

“When does it get to be about him?”

“In his own afterlife.”

“That’s cold and he’s not even my brother.”

“Do you even have a brother?” Erik asked, annoyed.

“I have two in fact. Had, they’ve been gone a very long time."

"They died? I didn’t know you could die.”

“Not die, they just went on to do other things. I haven’t seen them for a millennium.”

“Are they older or younger?”

“One older, one younger. My older brother was much like you. He wanted to protect us very much, but he was lost at how to do it. My younger brother was very much like Wilhelm, lost in the noise.”

“Lost in the noise? What does that mean?”

“You’ll find out. Let’s get back to the show.”

Erik looked back to the screen and realized he had missed quite a bit. It was showing August right now in the library asking Simon’s sister for her medication.

“August, what the hell are you doing?” Erik said, ashamed of his cousin right now.

Then his instincts about the Simon boy was more solidified when he agreed to get drugs for August. Erik didn’t want either around his brother, Wille was way too impressionable.

He watched Simon steal his own father’s medication, lying about the reason he was there. This was a bad kid.

“You don’t know him,” Lura said.

“I know all I need to know about him.”

It continued and he watched Simon hand the drugs over to August in the gym. What was that all about? Erik was shocked they didn’t get caught. Then it got awkward because August made it awkward.

“Why is he kissing him on the forehead?” Lura asked.

“I have no idea.”

His brother laughed and it seemed like a bonding moment between the two. Erik did not like that.

“We’ll you’re going to have to get over it. You’re just an observer,” Lura said.

“Unless I go back, you said I can go back. Then I’ll stop all this.”

“You have to wait until the finish. Trust me, you’ll never guess the ending.”

God, he really hated when Lura was all cryptic.

On screen Simon’s mother was dropping him and his sister off. He had forgotten Felice had asked Wille to go to a movie night. Then she invited Simon and his sister. It had looked like she did it to win points with his brother, but she defended the girl to August so maybe he was wrong.

“I love this part,” Lura said.

“Shut up.”

All the kids were watching some horror movie and Wille was sitting beside Simon. There was a jumps care and Wille’s hand went to Simon’s knee. So, this was going to happen no matter what Erik thought. Great.

After some grumblings from August and Vincent, Erik’s eyes zeroed in on Wille’s hand half on his knee and half on Simon’s. Why? Because the camera zeroed in on it.

“Just making sure you saw,” Lura said gleefully.

Then it showed Simon touching Wille’s hand.

“I hope this is as much as I have to see because I really don’t want to see my brother trying to have sex with this boy.”

“How do you know he’ll try that?”

“Because he’s a teenage boy. They’re both teenage boys.”

“Got me there,” Lura said.

The two boys looked at each other and Erik wanted that fast forward button so much.

“Why? It’s a beautiful, sweet story.”

“Would you want to watch your brother like this?”

“I watched my brother do much, much worse. Like being the bologna in a sandwich with two gladiators as the bread.”

“So, your brother is gay?”

“Never asked him. He’s just my brother. As long as everyone is of age and consenting it’s none of my never mind.”

“What?”

“Oh, just a big fan of The Parent Trap.”

“You’re a strange little…what are you a woman or a man?”

“Yes.”

“To which?”

Lura smiled. “Yes.”

“Whatever.”

Back on screen Simon’s sister seemed to have noticed what was happening. August was looking over, but Erik didn’t think he could see the hands from where he was.

“He’s bolting,” Lura said as Wille jumped up and ran out of the room.

“Wouldn’t you?”

“No.”

“Well, good for you.”

Erik watched as Wille ran down the stairs looking tense. “He’s biting his nails, he does that when he’s anxious.” Then Wille started looking at the school’s mantra and rubbing his chest, another thing he does when he’s anxious.

But he had to admit the mantra always got to him a little bit too. You Own the School. You Are Responsible for Its Legacy.

Wille then headed to the window. At first Erik was worried he would jump out, but he just opened it to get air.

“Simon’s coming to check on him. That’s sweet,” Lura said.

“Maybe. But if they kiss I’m not watching. That’s an invasion of their privacy and something I really don’t want to see.”

“Are you homophobic?”

“No, I just don’t want to see my brother like that. Who does? Boy, girl or other, it’s not for me.”

Wille was now rambling. Simon was looking concerned but then he leaned in and kissed Wille. It was an innocent kiss.

“Oh god, do something Wille,” he practically yelled. His brother was just staring at him like he was an alien. Simon leaned in again and kissed him once more, this one broken by a jump scare from the movie. “This is just sad.”

“I’m not…” Wille said, and Simon turned away to leave. “I’m not-hey, wait.

He thought it would be awkward to watch this, and it was a little but the thing that stuck out the most was how much Wille was battling himself. He looked so sad, so tortured about his own feelings for the boy.

Will grabbed Simon’s shirt and pulled him to him. When the kiss happened, this one was not as chaste as the ones before, he didn’t look away. Let the kid have some fun, after all in a few days’ time his life will change for the worse.

“How had I forgotten?”

“What?” Lura asked.

“Wille said he had met someone. He didn’t want to tell me, and I see why but I got him to tell me.”

“Yes, I remember seeing that, don’t worry we’ll be going over that. I just have one question.”

“Yes?”

“You didn’t say that he met a girl when talking to him. You said, “you met someone.” I have a feeling you already knew.”

“Shut up.”

Chapter Text

“I think he’s dreaming,” Lura said, eyes glinting with mischief. “We can watch his dreams. Do you want to?”

Erik glanced at the screen where Wille had just fallen asleep in his dorm room, likely dreaming after the kiss with Simon.

“Uh… no… I… do… not.”

“Why not?” Lura asked, clearly enjoying Erik’s discomfort.

“Because he’s a teenage boy and went to bed after kissing someone he likes. That is 100 percent going to be a dream I don’t want to see.”

“Come on, it’ll be fun to see in his head. Like a candid interview,” Lura coaxed, smirking.

“No.”

“Well, I’m going to watch anyway,” Lura said, pressing the input button. “You’re no fun.”

The screen flickered and shifted. Erik tensed but let out a relieved breath when the image resolved into a younger Wille.

“Five-year-old Wille. Okay, I’ll admit I’m relieved,” Erik muttered.

Wille was running through the palace halls, an enormous smile lighting up his little face. Behind him, Helga hurried to keep up, her arms flapping as she tried to rein in her young charge.

“Prince Wilhelm, running is not proper,” Helga said, though she smiled as she chased after him.

Erik’s lips twitched. The palace was decorated for Christmas, the tasteful, understated kind that their mother insisted on. It was a scene Erik knew well, though he hadn’t thought of it in years.

Dream Wille clutched a bright red ornament in his tiny hands, the kind made of construction paper and glitter that screamed “school craft project.” His eyes sparkled with pride as he ran toward the great hall. Erik groaned softly, already knowing where this was going.

“Where’s he going?” Lura asked.

“To put that ornament on the tree. He’s excited. It’s not going to end well.”

On screen, Wille burst into the great hall, his tiny footsteps echoing off the marble floors. Their parents were seated at the far end of the room with an advisor, deep in conversation about the plans for the Christmas ball. Erik saw his ten-year-old self sitting stiffly beside them, looking bored out of his mind but dutifully taking notes as their mother had requested.

“Mamma! Pappa!” Wille called, skidding to a stop.

Queen Kristina looked up, her lips pressing into a faint line at the interruption. “Wilhelm, darling, please don’t yell,” she said, her tone tight but polite.

“I made this at school!” Wille said, holding up the ornament triumphantly. “Can I put it on the tree?”

Kristina glanced at the glittery creation and frowned. “No, Wilhelm. It would ruin the aesthetic of the tree.”

Wille’s face fell. “But I made it…”

“You can keep it in your room,” Kristina said, her voice softening slightly but still firm. “It’s lovely, but it doesn’t go with the decorations.”

Wille’s bottom lip trembled. He looked down at the ornament, tears welling in his eyes. He didn’t wail or throw a tantrum—he just stood there, clutching his little creation as silent tears streaked down his cheeks.

Erik’s younger self rose from his chair and crossed the room, crouching beside Wille.

“I bet we can get Thomas to dig out Grandmother’s old fake tree,” Erik whispered, his tone conspiratorial. “You remember? The little one she used to have in her room before she passed away.”

Their father’s mother had moved in with them a few years before she died. Long gone was the woman who made his father’s life hell. She was old and sick, but Erik would take Wille into her room to visit her every night. She died the spring before that Christmas. He didn’t find out what a horrible mother she was to his father until much later, Wille never did.

Wille’s tears slowed as he looked up at his brother with hope. “Can I put my ornament on that tree?”

“Of course,” Erik said, ruffling Wille’s hair. “I bet it’ll look perfect on that tree. We’ll make other ornaments too for it.” Erik turned and looked at Helga who looked like she was close to tears herself. She had never been able to stand up to his mother, she always saw the little girl she raised.

“Really?” Wille sniffled, his small hands clutching Erik’s arm.

“Really.” Erik smiled, taking the ornament from Wille and giving him an encouraging nudge.

Erik led Wille out of the room, leaving their parents and the advisor behind, Helga trailing after. Lura watched the scene silently, their usual smirk nowhere to be found.

“That was a sad dream,” Lura said softly as the screen faded back to the present-day Wille, still fast asleep in his dorm room.

Erik’s jaw clenched as he stared at the blank screen. “It wasn’t a dream,” he said quietly. “That really happened.”

Lura turned to him, their teasing demeanor replaced by genuine sadness. “All of it?”

“All of it,” Erik confirmed. “It was always like that. Everything had to look perfect, no matter what we felt.”

“Your mother didn’t even mean to hurt him,” Lura said thoughtfully. “She just…didn’t know how to be what he needed.”

“She didn’t know how to be what any of us needed,” Erik said, his voice tight. “But she did her best.”

Chapter Text

“I miss going to Hillerska,” Erik said as he watched Wille closing his locker.

“Why? Doesn’t seem like the most fun place in the world. That would be Dollywood.”

“What’s Dollywood?”

Lura looked at him with disgust. “Just when I thought we could be friends. Anyway, answer the question.”

“It was fun. I ruled that place.”

“Do you think Wilhelm will rule it in his time?”

“My brother? No.”

“Why not?”

“He thinks of it as a punishment…as a prison. I couldn’t wait to go.”

“There’s always a top dog even in prison and that’s all about punishment.”

“No, prison is about rehabilitation.”

Lura started laughing. “You’re not a prince here, you don’t have to be so politically correct.”

Erik rolled his eyes and looked back at the screen. Wille was now creeping up on Simon who was playing piano in the music room.

“I believe your brother has fallen hard for that boy.”

“He gets attached too easily,” Erik muttered.

Wille was now joining Simon in the room. They were talking some and Wille offered to help Simon learn to read sheet music.

“Your brother plays piano?” Lura asked.

“And cello.”

“Is he good?”

“He’s not bad.”

“That’s not an answer.”

“It’s another thing he saw as a punishment.”

“Was there anything he didn’t see as a punishment?”

“Riding.”

“The thing you talked him into quitting.”

Erik shook his head. “I didn’t talk him into quitting. I just pointed somethings out to him.”

“Lucky him,” Lura said.

“Look, I love Wille, but he is one of the most unambitious people in the world. If you don’t make him do something, he won’t do anything.”

On screen Wille started to look nervous as Simon talked about Friday night.

“I think maybe we should forget about it,” Wille said to Simon. Simon looked like someone just kicked his puppy. “Because I did say that, you know, I’m not…I’m not like that.”

“What a jerk,” Lura said.

“What did you expect him to do, make a post on Instagram about his new boyfriend?” Erik said annoyed. Wille was doing the right thing here.

They watched as Simon fled the music room while Wille looked crestfallen. Soon it showed Wille and August on the water with crew.

August was going on about class again. Erik rolled his eyes. He believed in class division but you can’t just go around talking about it. People don’t like it.

“I’m looking forward to seeing the queen again. It’s been a while,” August added.

“They’re not coming,” Wille informed him.

“What? But it’s Parents’ Day.”

“Shouldn’t August know that your parents don’t come for Parents’ Day?” Lura asked.

“My senior year both came, same for my first year. My second year only my dad came, my mother was away on business,” Erik said.

“Doesn’t sound right,” Lura said before looking back at the screen.

“Yeah, but they’re on some kind of state trip,” Wille said.

“Couldn’t your father come and leave your  mother to do the state trip alone?” Lura asked.

“The time he came alone just for me, it wasn’t like he did much.”

“Still, I think your brother would be appreciative.”

“My father is my mother’s husband first and our father second.”

“You second, not really sure where your brother falls on that list if he can’t even show up for a few hours to meet some teachers and listen to some badly written poetry by their kid.”

“He already met the teachers, I just told you that.”

“So not only did they not bring your brother to school when he started, they can’t be bothered to visit him on days that are made for that. I’m actually shocked they haven’t been here about his studying. I’ve seen him look at books a lot but never actually study.”

“He gets good grades, he’s one of those people you love to hate because he doesn’t really need to study to pass.”

“Because of being a prince?”

“No, like I told you before, he’s smart he just lacks ambition and focus.”

“I wouldn’t say he doesn’t have focus. Look,” Lura said.

On screen Wille was staring at Simon. It was actually kind of creepy. “He must be more like our father than he would like to say.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Because all my father sees is my mother, like she’s the only person in the world. Sucks for his kids but that’s life.”

“Isn’t that just because she’s the queen?”

“No, my father fell in love with my mother on first sight. It took her a while to fall in love with him though.”

“Interesting.”

“What?”

“Nothing.” Lura turned back to the television. “He looks so sad.”

“He’s a sad kid, it’s his thing.” Erik paused. “No, he used to be a really happy kid.”

“What happened?”

“He realized that Shakespeare was right.”

“How?”

“All the world’s a stage, and all the men and women merely players. They have their exits and their entrances; And one man in his time plays many parts.”

“That’s a good one but not my favorite.”

“Dare I ask?”

“No legacy is so rich as honesty.”   

Erik snorted. “Yeah, for those who can afford to be honest.” He looked back at the screen. “Christ, all he needs now is black fingernail polish and a nose ring.” Wille was just sadly walking around the grounds of the school all alone. Now Erik knew he was guilty of the same thing in his time, but it was never this pitiful.

Then there were scenes of Wille not being able to sleep and watching two kids make out in a creepy way. The watching, not the making out.

Now on screen was Wille watching Simon in the gym. He went over to him and said hi only to be ignored.

“Oh, that’s got to hurt,” Lura said.

“Don’t chase after him,” Erik said annoyed.

“Well, he was the one that turned Simon down and told him to forget about their kiss.”

Erik ignored Lura, they would never understand the pressure they lived under.

“Are you okay?” Wille asked Simon. The other boy was rolling up a mat and looked very disinterested.

“Hmm?”

“Uh, this weekend we get to go home,” Wille said then crossed his arms and looked at the other boy for way longer than needed. “You know, ‘cause, um…after lunch tomorrow, the parents stay for a bit and then…on Friday, they take their kids and go home for the weekend.”

“This is painful to watch,” Erik told Lura.

“Yeah, not as much fun as I thought.”

“Thanks for explaining the schedule,” Simon replied to Wille and started to walk away.

“Ouch,” Erik said. “He’s not interested Wille, move on.”

“You don’t pay attention do you?” Lura asked.

“What do you mean?”

“Do you really think it takes that long to roll up a mat? That boy wanted to hear what your brother had to say. If he wasn’t interested he would have walked away much sooner.

Erik missed what was said after that but he could guess from what Wille said next.

“If I were to stay here…would you…like to keep me company? Just you and me.” Wille really was playing with fire here.

“Okay, he’s starting to creep me out a little bit with the staring,” Lura said.

“It’s just him. You know how some people have anxiety issues and can’t make eye contact? Wille has anxiety issues and can’t stop making eye contact. It’s like he’s trying to figure something out.”

“Oh, that’s kind of endearing then,” Lura replied.

“What happened to “we should forget about it”?” Simon asked on screen.

“I take it back.”

“That boy is going to play with Simon’s heart,” Lura said confidently.

“He won’t mean to,” Erik said, knowing Lura was right.

“He’s smiling, he’s already lost,” Lura said looking at Simon.

The scene jumped to Simon eating breakfast at his house. Then rummaging through the mail, finding a letter from Hillerska. Simon looked shocked at the amount.

“It’s not much money,” Erik said, unsure of why Simon was looking so upset.

“Oh, my sweet summer child,” Lura said, patting Erik on the head, he didn’t like that.

“What?”

“It’s a lot of money if you don’t have money.”

“Oh, yeah.”

Now on screen was Simon looking at August.

“Why is he looking at him like that?”

“You need to pay attention when others besides Wille is on screen. Simon wants his money. August not only had Simon get him alcohol for Wilhelm’s initiation, but he also got Simon to get him medication for  ADHD, something that August doesn’t have.”

Erik didn’t like that one bit. Simon was a drug dealer?

“He needed money, and he foolishly thought August would pay him.”

“I’m not sure what to even say,” Erik said.

“You should wait, I think you’ll find something to say in a little bit.”

“You’re gonna report me to the principal? Rat me out?” August was asking Simon. “You’re not that kind of guy.” Then August left, leaving an angry Simon.

Then the screen cut to the parents arriving, including Simon’s mother and August’s mother and stepfather. Erik again let his mind wonder, it wasn’t like his parents were going to be there.

Giggling beside him caught his attention. “What’s your problem?” Erik asked Lura.

Lura pointed to the screen. Right now, the school song was being sang and anyone looking at his brother or Simon would see them just smiling at each other. “If he keeps acting like that the whole world is going to know.”

“You haven’t seen nothing yet,” Lura said.

The girl Felice and her mother was on screen, he watched some but when the mom started in on trying to get Felice with Wilhelm he went somewhere else in his head.

“This isn’t good,” Lura said, dragging Erik out of his thoughts.

“What?”

Lura pointed at the screen. August was headed towards Simon and his family. Erik had to agree, something was going to happen, and it probably would be bad.

“Hey,” August said to Simon.

“What’s up?”

“Lunch won’t be open to everyone today since it’s Parents’ Day.”

“What? But that’s why we’re here.”

“Parents’ Day isn’t for non-boarders.”

“Is that true?” Lura asked.

“Yes and no,” Erik said as he watched the exchange.

“Meaning?”

“The lunch isn’t normally for non-boarders but there is an exception. The Prefect of the house is supposed to ask all non-boarders who eat in their house if their parents want to come. Then if they do, they are added.”

If Simon looked angry before, now he looked downright seething. Especially after August said he would fix it.

“So, it’s August’s fault there wasn’t room for them to begin with?” Lura asked.

“I’m sure he just forgot,” Erik said, defending August.

“Sure,” Lura said.

Screen cut to August using Wille as a photo op. Erik didn’t like that either, thankfully, Wille left after a picture was taken. Then it cut to his own face.

“Ahh!” Lura shouted.

“Stop it,” Erik said, rolling his eyes.

He listened to himself tell Wille to suck it up and do what was expected of him.

“This is the last time he talks to you,” Lura said.

“What?”

“This is your last conversation ever with him. He’ll go over what was said a million times in his head. Trying to think if he had told you to come and get him, would you still be alive.”

“No,” Erik denied.

“He blames himself for your death.”

“How?”

“If you were coming to get him you wouldn’t be on that stretch of road.”

“I was planning on sending a driver to get him. I had plans to go out that day. None of it was his fault.”

“Don’t tell me.”

“Well, I can’t tell him, can I.” He was very annoyed right now.

Chapter Text

Erik didn’t know what he was feeling.

“Nostalgia. It’s to be expected knowing that your time has come to an end.”

“I thought you said I could go back?”

“If you choose that but you might not choose that path.”

“Why would I want to stay dead?”

Lura just shrugged and looked back at the screen, so Erik did too.

On screen Wille was politely talking to the people at the table. Then things got a little weird when Simon’s sister apparently dropped Felice in trouble with her parents. Pointing out she has been lying to them about her riding skills.

They watched as Felice got up and ran away, Wille following her. Erik could tell Wille was just trying to be nice, but she must have thought it was something else because she leaned in and kissed him. Wille at least was honest in not liking her that way, not that that made her feel any better.

“Oh, this is awkward,” Lura said.

“Yeah.”

“All from a little fight.”

“There is usually a few fights with parents during Parents’ Day.”

“You ever fight with your parents during their visits?”

Erik nodded. “My first year. I didn’t want them to come.”

“Why not?”

“My mother is a very…domineering woman. It was always something with her. Nothing I did was good enough. I wasn’t trying hard enough in class. I wasn’t doing good enough a job making powerful friends. It just was never enough. Wille is lucky, our parents didn’t care about how he did.”

Lura looked shocked. “You really think that? You think being ignored is better than having your parents have high expectations?”

“I didn’t say that. And they don’t ignore him, they just…leave him alone.”

“That sounds very lonely.”

“He’s not alone/alone, he has family and friends.”

“Really?” Lura was pointing at the screen that showed Wille alone while other kids were saying goodbye to their parents.

“You just don’t understand what it’s like. It wasn’t like he was expecting our parents to show up.” It would be different if Wille had been hoping for them to show up, but he wasn’t.

“That’s my point. Most kids would at least hope that maybe their parents would change their plans for them or at least work around them. Your brother didn’t even hope that they would change their plans. That’s how it is for him.”

Erik turned back towards Lura. “Hey, he didn’t even want to come home and see me. I don’t think he’s that homesick for us.”

“No, he would have to have a home first, what he as is a bed in a museum.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” Erik wasn’t about to argue about this, his parents did the best they could.

Back on screen it showed August and his mother arguing about money.

“He’s broke?” Erik asked.

“Did you not pay attention earlier when I said that he didn’t have money to pay Simon. He wouldn’t be if he sold some stuff, just like his mother said.”

“He would never,” Erik said just when August said he would rather die than sell.

“Why wouldn’t he sell?” Lura asked.

“Because it’s all about status for August. I guess I’m to blame a little for that.”

“A little?” Lura asked, looking annoyed.

“Fine, a lot.” He hated admitting it.

Erik just stared at the screen and watched Simon confront August and get kicked at to stay away. Then later Simon and his friends confronted August. This time Simon had the upper hand.

“I told you, he’s got fire,” Lura said as Simon launched himself at August.

“Come on fight back, he’s tiny,” Erik said horrified that Simon was kicking August’s ass.

“I want my money!” Simon roared at August. “Don’t you get it?”

“If I had it, I would have given it to you. I have no money. My family’s broke. I have nothing left. Okay?”

“At least get up off the ground,” Erik said, a little disgusted about what he was seeing.

“I don’t care. You’re gonna pay me.”

“Maybe he does have it in him to be with Wille. Because what he just did, was a royal move if I ever saw one,” Erik said.

“You think that was royal like?” Lura asked.

“Oh yeah. Not caring about how the other people struggle, if you owe you owe.” Erik’s eyes widened, he couldn’t believe he just said that.

“I think a little piece more of Crown Prince Erik just burned away,” Lura said.

Instead of answering he went back to watching. Simon’s friends dropped him at his home, and they didn’t seem happy with him. Then inside he was confronted by his sister about Wille.

“Why are you sneaking around?” Simon’s sister asked.

“He wants it that way,” Simon replied.

“Well, yeah, what would they expect him to do?” Erik asked.

“Be honest?” Lura asked.

“Be serious,” Erik said and looked back at the screen. Now the siblings were tickling each other and laughing. He missed his brother, even though he was able to see him.

The next scene was Felice going to August room and them having sex. Erik decided to look at his nails for a while. Then it was the next morning, and Simon told his mother that he was staying at his friend’s house.

“Sure,” Lura said, hitting Erik in the arm with his elbow. “He’s going to his friend Ayub’s house.”

“Stop that,” Erik said, irritated.

In the dining room at school, Simon entered and Wille sent him a text.

“Seriously anybody who watches your brother can see when that boy is in the room he can’t take his eyes off of him,” Lura added.

“Yeah.”

Simon found Wille sitting on the windowsill waiting for him. This is where he started watching, they caught up to his death.

The screen started moving fast, Erik looked over to see Lura holding the remote.

“I thought you said you couldn’t fast forward?”

“Turns out I lied,” Lura said with a smile. “We don’t want to watch what we already have seen.” Finally, he hit stop with Wille standing in front of the school in the chapel.

At first he read off the speech that was given to him, probably from Farima. Then he folded it back up.

“It feels so wrong that I’m the one still here…instead of him,” Wille said.

“Oh, Wille.” He hated seeing his brother so broken. At least he’ll have August with him, he may not like him that much, but they could grow closer.

“HA!”

Erik looked at Lura. “Something to add?”

“No,” he said and the way he said it reminded Erik of Bill Hadar portraying Keith Morrison with a grin.

“Whatever.” He went back to watching his brother.

“I know Erik would have said “What’s the point of having a backup if you never use it?” Wille said.

“See, even when I’m dead I’m funny.”

Lura rolled his eyes.

“My brother was kind and thoughtful. He was my role model. I’m going to  honor his legacy and become a crown prince my family can be proud of.”

“Doesn’t it make you feel bad?” Lura asked.

“What?”

“That he’s trying to be someone that he thought you were and when he fails because we both know that was just a facade you put on. How do you think he will feel?”

“I get it.”

The screen cut to Wille sitting alone and Simon coming to talk to him. From Wille’s demeaner it wasn’t going to be a good talk for either.

After some talk about texts, Wille dropped the bomb that Simon should have been expecting if you asked Erik.

“I want you to delete all our texts,” Wille said. No evidence, no crime.

“What?” Simon looked way too confused by this.

Wille stood up. “I can’t do this anymore,” he said before he walked out, leaving Simon alone.

Erik could finally breathe a sigh of relief. He was worried that Wille would try and have a relationship with this boy as Crown Prince. That just wasn’t done.

“I love a good plot twist,” Lura said laughing.

Chapter Text

Erik watched as Simon left on the bus. Then he watched Annete give Wille a bigger room.

“What the hell is that?” Erik said. “I die and they give him a bigger room. Rude.”

“Are you seriously jealous they gave your brother a bigger room…your grieving brother?”

“No,” he said.

“Liar. Look at you. Baby didn’t get a big room all to himself so now he’s mad.”

“I got my own room in my third year, that’s the rule. But it was a shoebox, like Wille’s first room.”

“Cry me a river. Hey, you think they’ll give him a pass on his work. You know like pass by catastrophe.”

“That’s an urban legend.”

“Most cool things are but they have to come from somewhere.”

Back on screen Erik watched as Wille hugged Annete way too long. “I’m not there.”

“What?” Lura asked.

“I’m not there. Wille is a very tactile kid, he always has been. Our parents aren’t, sure they hug but it’s not a real hug and they always stop it way before Wille wants to let go.”

“I remember when you were leaving you told him to let go.”

“If I didn’t he never would.”

“Are you sure he’s not lonely?”

“Of course he’s lonely,” Erik snapped. He was tired of whatever game Lura was playing. “It’s a lonely life. Mom had to be alone in it, at least we have each other.”

“Had.”

“What?”

“He had you. Now he doesn’t.”

Back on screen Malin was telling Wille they would be outside. Being followed around everywhere you went was a hard thing to get used to.

After the door was shut, Wille grabbed his snow globe. It had been a gift from their grandfather to Erik and he had given it to Wille. Then Wille pulled out his phone to remove Simon’s number. It was a good plan. But then he jumped up and ran out the door in a panic.

The bodyguards went to follow him.

“Please! Please! Would you please leave me alone for just one second?”

“He just doesn’t get it,” Erik said.

“Get what?” Lura asked.

“He’ll never be truly alone, they’ll be outside his door every second. It’s exhausting.”

“But still lonely?” Lura questioned.

“Very much so. They aren’t your friends, they’re like ghosts that follow you around. They don’t say anything but are always there.”

“Yeah, that’s creepy.”

Erik nodded as he watched Wille give his coat to Felice. That was nice of him. His little brother was more kindhearted than he gave himself credit for. Then strangely enough Wille took part in what could only be described as witchcraft. Well, whatever he wants.

The scene changed and now it was on Simon. He looked like he was stealing his father’s medication after making sure he wouldn’t choke on his own sick.

“I really don’t like that,” Erik said before the scene changed again. “WHAT THE HELL? I don’t want to see August have sex.”

“What? Thought that was something you liked.”

“Why on earth would you think that?”

Lura shrugged. “He doesn’t seem like a very giving lover.”

Erik closed his eyes and covered his ears. “LALALALALALALALALALA!”

When he was sure that was over he looked again, on screen was Simon giving August the drugs and blackmailing him into selling them to pay him back.

“And you want me to want this little drug dealer with my brother?” Erik asked hotly.

“I’m just an observer, as you are right now.”

Erik went back to watching, now it was the girl Felice and Simon’s sister, so he zoned out again. When he started paying attention again. August was in Felice’s room.

“Why have you got Wille’s jacket?” August asked.

“I bumped into him on the way to class, but I forgot to return it.”

“What is his deal?” Lura asked.

“He’s insecure, always has been. But it’s never been this bad.”

“Erik was like a brother to me, and you know that,” August said making Erik very uncomfortable when he started talking about she should comfort him and then he would comfort Wille.

“I hope not in the same way,” Lura said.

“Of course not,” Erik said but he couldn’t help but think it was a weird thing to say too.

August grabbed the jacket and went to Wille’s room. Thankfully he was stopped by Malin. At least now he wouldn’t be barging in on Wille all the time.

Next scene was pretty boring if you asked him. Simon was getting his money from the drugs being sold. And both Simon and August didn’t look happy about Wille and Felice being friends. God, he was so happy not to be a teenager anymore.

“Well, at the moment you’re not anything.”

Erik chose to ignore Lura.

Back on screen August kissed Simon’s sister in the stables.

“Consent, my guy,” Lura said to the screen.

It was uncomfortable to watch. Then it changed and showed Wille going into his room, finding a note. It was from The Society.

“WHAT THE FUCK!” he shouted.

“What?” Lura asked with pretend shock.

“They’re replacing me? I’ve just died. The absolute gall of these bastards.”

“That really got you upset.”

“I guess I just didn’t realize I was so replaceable. First as crown prince and now in the Society. What’s next?”

“I can’t give spoilers, I’ve told you.”

He looked back at the screen and saw Simon’s father push him up against the wall, holding him by the front of his jacket.

“What’s his problem?” Erik asked.

“He thinks Simon stole his drugs to use. And he’s kind of a dick.”

“Okay.”

“I do have to wonder if August will try and sell some of the drugs to Wille,” Lura mused.

“He wouldn’t dare.”

“Why not?”

“Because he wouldn’t. Wille started drinking before I found out or I would have stopped that. There’s no way I’m going to allow him to become some addict.”

“Are you saying you never dabbled?”

“I’m saying if August knows what’s good for him he’ll keep that shit away from Wille. Wille has enough issues right now.”

On screen Wille was sneaking out of his room. Why they put him on the first floor he didn’t know. Of course he was going to sneak out, who wouldn’t? Erik had been on the second floor.

“You’re seriously jealous of that too?”

“Shut up.”

Wille was being led by the boy August had introduced him to the first day. Andy or something like that.

“Alexander. You better learn it because he’s kind of important in the grand scheme of things.”

Wille unlocked the door and was greeted by the Society who looked like they were going to skin him and wear him as hats.

“You really are a strange man,” Lura said. Erik ignored them.

“I really don’t like this,” Erik said absently.

“Why?”

“Because Wille is so impressionable.”

“He’s sixteen, that’s not a child.”

“It is, just a bigger child.”

“We have unanimously voted in favor of offering you, Crown Prince Wilhelm, the seat that was formerly held by Prince Erik.”

“Hey,” Erik said, completely offended.

“It’s because they didn’t call you Crown Prince, isn’t it?” Lura asked.

“No.” Yes.

Lura laughed. But really, he was starting to get offended about how fast he was being replaced in everything. Maybe they should call up his ex-girlfriend, see if she wants Wille too.

“You really do have problems,” Lura said, shaking their head.

Back on screen, the screen had changed, and they were playing a drinking game. Great. At least he knew his brother wasn’t being introduced to something he hadn’t already been doing. So many times their parents had to deal with press when Wille had been caught drinking.

“Alexander, could you go get the stuff that will take us to the moon?” Vincent asked.

“What is he talking about?” Erik asked, not liking the thoughts that started to come to him.

“It’s like this. There are two criteria for becoming a member,” August said to Wille. “You need to be of noble birth and the first-born male.”

“I’m dead not erased. He’s not the first male born son.” This was too much.

“Wow, tell me you only identify yourself by your title without telling me,” Lura said.

“I know it shouldn’t be important, but it is…to me.”

“But you’re dead.”

“It doesn’t mean I still don’t have feelings.”

“That’s exactly what it means.”

Something caught Erik’s attention and everything that had been bothering him slipped away.

“What the fuck is that on the table?” he asked, already knowing the answer.

“That looks to be prescription drugs.”

“Fuck.” Erik shook his head. “Wille wouldn’t and August wouldn’t let him.”

Then he watched his cousin, the one he trusted to protect Wille and show him the right way to live, promise to look after the crown and Wille. Then he watched as August watched Wille put some pill in his mouth and take.

He was seething, this is wrong. Erik jumped up and started to pace.

“He promised. He fucking promised to look after him.”

“Maybe he thought this was looking after him,” Lura said.

“Whose side are you on?”

“I’m Switzerland. But that can’t be good,” Lura said, pointing back at the tv. On screen Wille was pocketing a lot of drugs. This couldn’t be happening.

“Who in their right mind gives drugs to a teenager who is grieving?”

“August is grieving too,” Lura said.

“August knows better. He’s eighteen, Wille is only sixteen and this is the first time away from home. Oh god, what if the press find out. Mom will lose her mind.”

“Hmm.”

“What does that mean?”

“Just that mixing alcohol and pills seems like a fast track to the great beyond.”

“Are you saying he overdoses? I swear if he dies and you knew this whole time I will-

“You’ll what? Kill me?”

“I’ll stop talking to you.”

“Oh no…please…don’t…” Lura said in a deadpanned voice.

On screen now, Wille and August were outside the Palace and urinating…a lot.

Wille was talking about how bad he was with names.

“He’s not lying, he’s terrible with them but I always thought that was because he just didn’t care.”

“He didn’t,” Lura said. “Why would the second son need to know the who’s who?”

“Wanna trade places?” Wille asked jokingly.

“Why not?” August said very much not joking.

“How are they not done yet?” Lura asked.

“I used to egg him on to always…Why buy a fancy car if you don’t want to drive fast and feel the wind blowing with the top down? I told him that,” Wille said, breaking down some of the wall he had put up around himself.

“Fuck, kid, it wasn’t you. It was me, all me. I was the idiot who drove and ended up dying.”

“Everything’s, like, upside down. I don’t know how to act, what to feel. I shouldn’t even be functioning as a human being because my…brother is, like, dead.”

“You aren’t functioning,” Erik said, wishing his brother could hear him. “You’re surviving, it’s much different.”

“And here I am, partying,” Wille said before looking around looking like he just realized August was still there.

“It’s not your fault,” August told Wille.

Well, at least now August was doing the right thing. Now all he had to do was get Wille back to the dorms and in without the bodyguards knowing.

“Okay, but don’t touch him with your pee hands,” Lura said.

Against his will almost, Erik laughed. Then he watched as August tilted his head back and yelled, Wille following him. The palace wasn’t that far from the dorms, that was a little reckless, but he would allow it.

“How kind of you,” Lura said.

“Stop reading my mind.”

“No.”

The scene changed again. On it was now Wille up against a chain length fence. “Where the hell is he?”

He saw a football goal that Wille was now trying to climb or hug, he wasn’t sure.

“Doesn’t it look familiar? It’s the football pitch that Wille watched Simon’s friend play on.”

Then Wille proceeded to make a complete fool of himself. “Where’s August or Vincent? Hell, where is that Alexander kid? Why is my drunk and high little brother IN TOWN? How did he get there and why isn’t anyone with him?”

“He’s a big boy.”

“No, if they gave him booze and drugs while promising to protect him and then fuck off to leave him to get back to the dorms alone, that’s fucked. Fuck!”

“I do declare, I’ve never heard so many F bombs from such royal lips before. I like it.”

“Quit playing. Tell me he’s alright.”

“I said no spoilers.”

Erik looked back at the screen.

“No, don’t eat the astroturf,” Erik said, groaning because he was too late.

“Your brother is weird when he’s high.”

“He’s always weird, he’s just weirder at the moment.”

The screen cut to Simon, and the sound of his phone vibrating.

“Hello?” Simon said, his eyes were barely open. He had been sleeping.

“Simon,” Wille’s voice said through the phone.

“Hello? Who’s this?” Simon asked.

“I really like you.”

“Wille, is that you?”

“Who else would it be?” Erik snapped. Not liking this bit at all. “I thought Wille deleted his number.”

“Unsure. But I like to think he memorized it. It seems like something he would do,” Lura said.

“You see, everything is just fake,” Wille went on to tell Simon.

God, he really was out of his mind right now. “Where the fuck is August?”

“Unclear.”

Erik rolled his eyes. “You’re no help.”

Erik watched as Simon rode on his bike to Wille after figuring out where he was. When Simon arrived Wille was face down on the pitch. Perfect.

“What did you do?” Simon asked.

“You came.”

“Are you high? What are you on? Sit up,” Simon told him.

“You came!”

“Why does he sound like that was a big thing for him? That Simon came to help him?”

“Because we never did. Mom said him doing things like that was a way to get attention. That’s why she always sent Farima to get him when he was in trouble. She said that if any of us went it would be giving him what he wants and he would keep doing it.”

“Do you believe that?” Lura asked.

“I believe they were cries for help, just like this. She’s not perfect but she tries.”

Erik watched as Simon pulled Wille up and tried to get him vertical. Wille was very much out of it. Whoever let him leave like that, Erik shook his head. He knew the answer, it was August. Why didn’t he know though? Maybe because he was an only child, he didn’t get that you don’t just leave someone like that.

“I don’t think that’s going to work,” Lura said as Wille jumped on Simon’s back. “I wonder what would have happened if Simon didn’t come and get him?”

Erik didn’t have to wonder. Someone would have found Wille passed out on the football pitch and there would be a TikTok of his baby brother drunk and high for the world to see.

“It wouldn’t be good,” was all Erik said.

On screen now was a sleeping Simon, covered by his jacket.

“Is that Wille’s room?” Erik asked.

“I do believe it is,” Lura answered.

Simon’s phone rang and he read the text. It was from his sister asking where he was.

The view panned over to Wille who was covered and awake.

“Why doesn’t he have a shirt on? How did Simon get him back to the dorm and through the window?”

“Well, I didn’t know you wanted to see all of that. I can show you if you want. It involves your very high and drunk little brother doing a strip tease to a very annoyed Simon.”

“Pass.”

“Thought so.

“Wait. Don’t go,” Wille said, reaching out for Simon.

Simon asked Wille how he was doing and Wille answered he was doing better. That was good. Then Wille asked Simon to stay until he fell back asleep.

“Why did he do that?” Lura asked.

“What?”

“He asked Simon to stay but instead of letting Simon hold him, he wants to hold Simon.”

“You haven’t figured that out?” Erik asked. “I thought you were the know it all. Wille is doing that, so Simon doesn’t let go of him first.”

“That’s sad.”

“Yeah.”

Simon then asked Wille if he remembered what he said the night before, causing Wille to sit up. At least Wille looked sober now. Erik could kill August for leaving him alone.

“Wille? It’s okay,” Simon said. It made Wille smile and buried his face in the front of Simon’s hoodie.

“Yes, I do.”

“That’s sweet,” Lura said.

Erik looked at him. “I thought this was over.”

“I didn’t.”

“Because you know everything.”

Suddenly Lura started giggling like mad. “I don’t think you want to see this.”

Erik looked back to the screen. No, he did not want to see that. His brother and Simon were…doing stuff. Erik looked away.

“Tell me when this is over.”

“You’re no fun.” After a minute he spoke up. “I think you’ll want to see this.”

Erik looked back up at the screen and the scene changed to outside the dorms. That’s when he saw August. He was tapping on a window and saying the name Alexander quietly.

“So, this asshole wasn’t even in his room. What was he doing to this early that was so important that he couldn’t watch over Wille after he was the one that got him drunk and high.”

“Not to play devil’s advocate but…Wille chose to drink and take the drugs, August didn’t force him to do it.”

“There wouldn’t be any drugs there without Simon,” Erik said harshly.

“So, is it August’s fault or Simon’s? It looks like you want to blame everyone else but Wille for HIM getting completely blitzed.”

Erik wasn’t going to dignify that with an answer and looked back just in time to see that August had moved to Wille’s window and was now pulling out his phone.

“What the fuck is he doing?” he asked just as August hit record. Everything went black for Erik for a moment. When everything came back into focus, August had stopped recording and looked shocked. He must have seen that it was Simon that Wille was with.

“You got so mad you blacked out, that was wild. I can’t wait until what happens next,” Lura said but it went in one ear and out the other for Erik, he was too angry to comprehend what Lura was going on about.