Chapter Text
Apollo wakes up in a bed that is not his own.
The mattress is stiff and uneven, even his blankets are scratchier than they should be. Ignoring that, the ceiling above his head is wooden, certainly not like his house in Austin.
Apollo tries to get up from the bed to figure out what's going on, but trips and stumbles over legs that feel extremely weird.
Apollo finds himself on the ground staring at his hands which are... Small. So much smaller than they’re supposed to be. His skin is smooth, too, none of the wrinkles and blemishes he built up over the years. If Apollo didn't know any better he'd think he was suddenly in a much younger body. Of course he does know better and there must be a rational explanation for all this. He just... Doesn't know what it is yet.
Apollo takes another attempt at standing, this time paying special attention to his body and the way it moves. He manages to stand, and survey his surroundings. He's in a small bedroom, fairly sparse though there's a handful of wooden toys and knick knacks around. There's a window on one wall which he peers out of.
Outside is a pastoral landscape, rolling green hills spotted with fences and farmland, the occasional building. It's not anywhere he recognizes. In fact it looks practically medieval.
Definitely still a rational explanation. Somewhere.
Apollo turns to the door, and cautiously begins making his way through the house. The bedroom was on the second floor, so Apollo slowly makes his way down the stairs.
On the ground floor Apollo hears noises in one of the rooms so he peeks through the doorway. Bustling about in a small and rudimentary kitchen is... It's his mom. Almost. She's younger than she's been in years, and some things are slightly off, her hair is a different color, a different texture. It's as though someone has put a filter over a picture of his mom.
After a moment she notices him.
“Apollo! What are you doing out of bed?” She asks with concern.
“What?” Apollo asks, surprised at how high pitched his voice comes out.
“You've had a fever the last few days, sweetheart.” His mom says as she places a hand on his forehead.
“Looks like it's gone down now, though.”
“Oh.” Apollo says, unsure.
“How do you feel?” His mom asks.
“Um. Weird.” Apollo says.
“Well, why don't we get you back to bed, hm? I'm sure you'll feel better after a little more rest.”
Apollo finds himself unresisting as his mom picks him up and carries him back up the stairs.
She sets him down gently in bed, and then says she'll be back in a little while with some food.
After she leaves Apollo begins to think.
It doesn't seem like this is a dream, or at least it doesn't feel like one. Apollo tries to remember how he got here, focusing hard on his moments before he fell asleep. There's a strange sort of fuzziness to his memory. He remembers... Something bad. Being in pain, hurting, and then... He woke up here.
He has a thought that feels crazy, but the situation is crazy, so he carefully considers it. Apollo... May have died. And he was reincarnated into some sort of strange medievaal fantasy version of reality.
That feels impossible. And more importantly if this is some sort of afterlife, being reincarnated into just himself but a child is probably about the most boring thing that could have happened. Apollo didn't watch much anime but he knows at the very least that some wild shit can happen with these things. People get reincarnated into monsters and animals and inanimate objects all the time. And here he is just... A boring human.
Well, there's probably still some reasonable explanation which will come to him if he thinks on it for a little while.
-
In the following months, a more reasonable explanation does not present itself.
Apollo does learn quite a bit about his new world, however. Apollo, by dint of his family occupation, is a shepherd. Him and his parents tend to a decently sized herd of sheep, and while it's still not actually the real thing, if Apollo pretends to be a border Collie while herding the sheep in at night, well, that's no one's business but his own.
Apollo learns of the kingdom in which he lives, Goldenrod, which he learns in passing comments and gripes from his father is besieged by an evil demon lord somewhere far away from Apollo’s hometown. That was a rather ominous tidbit to learn, and one which his father regularly brushes off and tells him not to worry about when Apollo asks of it.
Apollo feels a spark of hope when he learns of the existence of magic. If there's mages and wizards out there, then that means druids might exist. And if that's the case... Then maybe he didn't reincarnate into the wrong world after all. If Apollo could turn into a dog at will... he wouldn’t mind living in this picturesque countryside herding sheep for the rest of his life.
When Apollo expresses an interest in learning magic to his parents... It doesn't go over particularly well. He realizes why fairly quickly. Apollo is a peasant. To send him for actual schooling somewhere would cost far more than his family makes in a whole year. More than in ten years. And even if the cost wasn't an issue, Apollo is an only child. If he leaves to study magic, and becomes a mage of some sort, then his father's legacy will be effectively lost. His family has been shepherds for generations. Apollo feels guilty for even thinking it, even though this world and this family still doesn’t feel quite like his.
The biggest breakthrough comes shortly after his eleventh birthday, when his father finally relents. He takes Apollo into town to meet with the Village witch. Apollo is brought to a storefront that he has seen in passing before. Through the dim windows it appears to be some sort of combination of a bookshop and Apothecary.
Apollo steps inside the store following his Father.
A voice calls out from the back of the store, and Apollo’s heart flutters for a moment. It's a voice he recognizes.
“I’ve brought my son, we discussed it the other day? He’s bright for his age, and, well. He wants to learn.” Apollo’s father says.
“Well, let’s see him, then.” Says Hafu.
Apollo feels tears beginning to come to his eyes. It’s Hafu.
“Oh! Uh! Hi, I’m sorry, did I say something wrong? Are you... okay?” Hafu asks in a slight panic looking back and forth between Apollo and his father.
In the time that Apollo has been in this world he has suppressed all thoughts of his friends and family back home. Thinking about them at all makes him desperately sad. But here Hafu stands in front of him, and the joy he feels at the revelation is overwhelming. She looks different, she’s dressed like an rpg character, and she has slightly pointed ears, but it's her.
Before Apollo can stop himself he stumbles forward and wraps Hafu in a hug. He only just barely comes up to her waist, but hugging her feels like he’s finally home, or at least part way there.
“Apollo!” his father says. “I’m so sorry, he’s not normally an emotional child.”
“That’s... alright...” Hafu says, awkwardly patting Apollo on the head.
Apollo looks up at Hafu and sees her staring down at him. He can see it in her expression immediately.
She doesn't know him.
Apollo takes a step back and wipes his face quickly.
“I'm sorry.” Apollo says. “Please teach me magic.” He continues.
Hafu gives him a funny look for a moment, but he speaks eventually.
“Well, we’ll have to see if you have any aptitude for it before I agree to anything.” She says.
“Whatever you need.” Apollo says.
“Alright, kid.” Hafu says.
Hafu searches through various drawers in her cramped shop, before finding whatever it is she’s looking for. It's a small velvet pouch, which she sets on a counter. She puts on a pair of gloves before pulling what looks like a small pearl from the pouch.
“I'm gonna put this in your hand, and then you're going to need to focus real hard, okay?” Hafu says.
“Focus on what?” Apollo asks.
“Whatever it is that you want, deep down.” Hafu says.
Apollo considers it. He wants to learn magic so that he can figure out if it's possible for him to be a druid. That's something he wants very badly, but he isn't sure if it's the whole of it. After seeing Hafu, he really wants to see the rest of his friends again, even if they don't remember him. Apollo tries to think harder, beneath all of it, what is it that he really wants.
Apollo thinks of his life before this world. Of why he's been given a second chance, if there's a reason at all.
The thing that he wants. The thing he didn't get the first time around.
As Hafu places the pearl in Apollo's outstretched hands, Apollo supposes that what he really wants is to be someone who can be happy.
The second the pearl touches his skin it cracks cleanly into several pieces.
Hafu blinks down at the shards in surprise.
“What does that mean?” Apollo’s father asks with trepidation.
“Well. there’s certainly the potential for something, here.” Hafu says, brushing the shards off of Apollo's hands into a waste basket.
“Does that mean you’ll teach me?” Apollo asks.
Hafu stares down at the shimmering fragments in the trash for a moment and then looks back up at Apollo.
She smiles, though her lips press into a tight line.
“We'll see.”
-
Hafu begins teaching him shortly after that. He comes into town and spends time with Hafu in-between chores at home and tending to the sheep.
Early into the arrangement Apollo learns that David is here too. Even in this universe they still found each other. They still got married. It makes Apollo immensely happy, and it gives him faith that the others are probably here, somewhere, as well.
David is a normal human, unlike Hafu who has elven blood in her family some ways back. David often walks Apollo home from his sessions with Hafu, even though Apollo feels plenty old enough to be about by himself. It still trips him up sometimes, interacting with Hafu and David when he knows them as his friends and peers, even though they see him as a child.
Hafu isn't a bad teacher. She seems to enjoy it, in fact, and her and David both clearly like having him around. In his world they wanted kids, Apollo thinks. He wonders why they don't have any here. He never asks though, it feels a bit rude.
Hafu starts with simple exercises, building up Apollo's knowledge of medicinal and herbal practices and teaching him basic mana concentration techniques. Feeling magic is something that takes Apollo a while to get a hang of. It’s like another sense that Apollo didn’t even realize he had. It’s almost like the feeling of static in the air on a dry summer day, or the shift in the atmosphere before a storm. A faint buzzing in the background hum of life.
Once Apollo can feel magic while barely having to concentrate, Hafu deems him ready to start learning actual magic, rather than just apothecary work and sensing.
“The basics of all spell-craft is visualization.” Hafu tells him, while she sets an empty glass on the counter in front of Apollo.
Hafu casually sweeps clutter from the counter in order to make more room, before setting down a salt cellar beside the glass.
“There are different methods to go about it, chants and magic words and all that junk, but when it comes down to it, all magic is about visualizing something you want, and then shaping the magic around you into that image.” Hafu says.
Apollo sits with rapt attention, watching as Hafu speaks.
“We’re going to start with something simple, creating water.” Hafu continues.
She takes a handful of salt, and then draws a small circle around the glass. She then slowly draws her finger around the rim of the glass, and Apollo gasps as water begins pouring down the inside of the glass, quickly filling it to the rim.
“Wow!” Apollo says.
Hafu smiles and then dumps the glass out in a wash basin, and brushes the salt away.
“Okay, your turn.” Hafu says with a smirk.
Apollo sighs.
“That’s all I get?” Apollo asks.
Hafu nods.
She has a habit of doing this, offering the barest explanation possible and letting Apollo flounder for a while before offering more help.
Apollo frowns in concentration as he takes a small handful of salt and pours it in a line around the glass. It's far less smooth than Hafu’s was. Apollo tries to concentrate on the feeling of magic buzzing in the air around him as he runs a fingertip around the lip of the glass. Nothing happens at first, so he keeps concentrating, trying to imagine the glass filling with water. His brow continues to furrow as he uselessly traces over the lip of the glass repeatedly.
“You need to have a clear and specific image in your mind. Just thinking of water, or the concept of filling a glass isn’t enough. You need to imagine exactly what you want to happen, and you need to concentrate on the magic around you at the same time.” Hafu says.
“Isn’t there an easier way? At least to start out?” Apollo asks.
“Well, I could teach you some chants. I know the words which would let you fill this glass, and you’d probably be able to use them properly by the end of the day.” Hafu says.
“Really? Then why don’t we do that?” Apollo asks.
“Because I believe that sort of thing enforces bad habits. When someone does a chant, it’s basically the same as this salt circle. It’s a tool to make the visualization easier. They’re both basically just language, placing a ring of salt around a glass means to fill it with water. It’s your association with the action that gives it power.” Hafu says.
“Then why is it different from using magic words?” Apollo asks.
“Because, using ritual objects like this forces you to use more abstract thinking. The goal with this, is to be able to use the magic without needing words or a ritual at all. That jump is easier to make when you’ve been training using an already abstracted thing like a ring of salt, rather than a spell you recite which literally translates to ‘fill the glass with water.’ doing it this way will make you more flexible and more able to improvise magic rather than having to rely on set memorized spells.” Hafu says.
Hafu begins running her finger over the glass, filling it more slowly this time. Apollo concentrates on the way that the magic in the air flows around her as she does so, trying to glean as much information as he can.
“And, doing it this way you’ll have a far more complete understanding and control over the magic that you work. Using magic words makes it easier to use magic, sure, but that also means it’s easier to use magic that you don’t have a firm grasp on. Someone who’s only ever used chants is way more likely to lose control of a spell than someone who learned the way that you’re going to.”
Hafu empties the glass and wipes away the salt again.
“Try again.” she says.
Apollo does so, taking more care to lay the salt circle this time, and trying to imagine the glass filling with water as hard as he can.
Hafu begins moving around the shop, filling orders for herbal remedies she’s received while Apollo continues trying to fill the glass. An hour later Apollo blinks, eyes wide, when small drops of condensation begin to form on the inside of the glass.
Apollo excitedly calls Hafu over to see his progress.
“Good job, I wasn’t expecting you to get this far on the first day.” She says.
Her tone and the contents of her sentence make it sound like a good thing, but there’s something in her expression that Apollo reads as uneasy. It reminds him of when they first met, when Apollo broke the pearl. Hafu gets over it quickly, but in small moments Apollo will catch this glimpse of something behind Hafu’s expression. Something about Apollo is off putting to her, and Apollo has no idea what.
“Keep practicing that, and once you can fill a glass in under a minute, you’ll do it without a circle.” she says, smoothing over whatever emotion she let slip however briefly.
Apollo nods up at her.
-
As time goes on Hafu slowly teaches him more advanced magic. She mostly sticks to simple house witchcraft but Apollo wouldn't complain in a million years. Something as simple as creating water or growing saplings when he came from a world without magic at all is just cool. Apollo can't get enough of it, and according to Hafu, he’s a fast learner.
Apollo still hasn't brought up his interest in druidcraft yet. Part of it is leftover anxiety from his last life around the topics of furries and fursonas. And part of it is because he's learned his lesson in the past about assuming things about this world, particularly in regards to terms which are used in the common parlance. For example, the term wizard is not something used at all, which Apollo was surprised to find out. There are mages and witches and spellcasters to be sure, but wizard is a title of legend. So druids might exist, but they might have a completely different name. Either way, Apollo still feels slightly unsure about bringing it up to Hafu, at least until he’s figured out whether or not it’s even possible.
One day Apollo is practicing in the fields while watching the sheep. He arranges leaves and blades of grass around an acorn he found to direct his magic, and then concentrates on the idea of a small, immature oak tree, just a sapling sprouting in place. Apollo can’t do a whole tree yet, though he was thoroughly impressed when Hafu demonstrated that trick for him.. He feels the tell tale buzz of energy which he recognizes as magic flowing past his fingertips and swirling around the acorn. Before his eyes, the acorn sprouts roots and sinks into the ground, a sapling quickly growing in its place. It’s not quite as big as he was intending but it’s still a start.
Apollo is almost twelve. It’s been nearly two years since he came to this world. He still can’t remember how he died, though by now he’s certain that he did. Apollo wonders sometimes, what happened to his house, and his pets. Artie and Sif and Riley. He misses them fiercely on some days, and there’s nothing he wishes more than that they could have come with him to this place. Artie would have been so good at herding the sheep.
Apollo frowns down at his hands.
Magic is just visualization. Picturing a clear image of what you want, and directing the magic of the world to take its shape.
All of the spells Apollo has learned work this same way. They’re so much looser and malleable than Apollo thought. When he set out to learn magic he expected spell slots, and D&D lists to memorize. That's not at all how it works. Hafu has even encouraged him to experiment with what he’s learned, to try and formulate new spells on his own.
Apollo stands with determination, and wanders around the field behind the flock, gathering up small bits of shed wool wherever they lie. He gathers enough scraps to make a small circle of it around his feet, and then he closes his eyes, and concentrates.
It's an easy image to visualize, one he’s been imagining for as long as he can remember. The exact form he wants to take, the feel of grass on paws, and wind in fur. He can almost feel his tail wagging.
The magic flows over him quickly, motes of energy hanging in the air like bits of dandelion puff.
Before he knows it, Apollo is much shorter. He looks down at his body and sees pawed feet, and white and black fur. It worked. It worked... pretty much perfectly. It didn’t even hurt or anything.
Joy swells in Apollo’s chest, and he runs around the field in wide happy circles, barking with happiness at the way the sheep huddle and move at his actions.
Apollo spends more than an hour as a border collie, and the unbridled freedom, the sense of rightness, of finally being in the proper body is overwhelmingly euphoric. He doesn’t even consider that it might be difficult to turn back until he actually does it. It’s certainly trickier than turning into a dog was, and takes him a few tries, but mostly it’s not all that difficult, and he feels exactly the same as he did before he transformed.
The next day when he arrives at Hafu’s shop, he’s ecstatic to show her what he’s figured out, all on his own.
“Alright, alright, show me what you’ve learned.” hafu says, smiling at him as he lays out a circle of wool on the floor.
Apollo had practiced more in his room the previous night, and while he’s fairly certain he could do this magic without a ritual, he wants to make sure it works perfectly.
The magic flows over him easily, and Apollo relishes the way his body shifts, moving into something so much closer to what feels like a true reality. Apollo looks up excitedly, tail wagging, to see Hafu’s reaction, and he freezes.
Hafu is pale and she takes a step away from him.
“Apollo, whatever you’ve done, undo it right now.” She says, her voice tense.
It takes Apollo longer than it had last night to change back, his panic about Hafu’s reaction interfering with his concentration, but eventually he shifts back, sitting on the floor staring wide eyed up at Hafu.
“Hafu?” Apollo asks, unsure.
“How did you learn to do that?” Hafu asks, voice less tense than before, but nowhere close to calm.
“I just figured it out!” Apollo says. “It’s the same as the other magic, it’s just like you taught me, visualize what you want, and then make it happen.”
“It’s not like the other magic. You shouldn’t be able to do it. That’s druidcraft, Apollo.” Hafu says.
“What’s wrong with that?” Apollo asks, defensive.
“That’s magic that only the beastmen can use, do you understand? This is... the only people who can do that are from the demon army, Apollo. A normal human... you shouldn’t be able to do that.” Hafu says.
“But... I can.” Apollo says, unsure.
Hafu crosses her arms, and leans back against the table behind her.
“Do you remember when we first met? That test I did with the pearls.” Hafu says.
Apollo nods.
“They’re called leaching pearls. They’re meant to draw some magic from a person. They change color to match a person’s aptitude.” Hafu says.
“So what does that mean? It... it broke.” Apollo says.
“Yes.” Hafu says. Her lips press into a thin line.
“Hafu, just tell me what’s going on, please?” Apollo says.
“You don’t have any magic. That’s why the pearl broke.” Hafu says.
“That doesn’t make any sense!” Apollo replies.
“Almost everyone has magic inside of them. When they’re learning spellcraft, people start by drawing on their own magic to cast spells. Learning to use ambient magic, the magic in the air and the ground, drawing on the world around us, that usually takes years to figure out. It’s the sort of thing that you don’t start learning until you’ve mastered the basics.” Hafu says.
“You don’t have any magic in your body. But, that by itself doesn’t completely make you an outlier. It’s rare, but some people, occasionally, are born without it. Most of them live normal lives, never even touch magic. But sometimes, a person without magic learns to harness ambient magic, and because it’s all they can use, it makes them stronger than the average spellcaster. It’s like learning carpentry, and starting by crafting a mahogany armoire.”
“Still though, even for those talented few, it takes years of hard training to get anything from it. Do you remember how long it took you to start using magic?” Hafu asks.
“A few days?” Apollo says nervously.
“No. That's how long it took for you to fill a full glass. But using magic at all? You were causing condensation to form in under an hour.” Hafu says.
“I... I don’t know what to say.” Apollo says.
“And now you’ve learned druid magic, entirely on your own.” Hafu says.
“I-I” Apollo Stammers.
“I don’t know what’s going on! I’m not a monster, I’m not some sort of demon, I didn’t even know any of that stuff! I’m just me! I just want to live my life! Hafu, please, I don’t know what I’m supposed to do.” Apollo says, and to his mortification his words are punctuated by sobs.
Apollo clutches at his chest, and stares at the floor as he cries.
Apollo feels Hafu’s arms wrap around him in a hug.
“I’m sorry.” She says. “Sometimes I forget that you’re still just a kid. I’ve gotten to know you pretty well, I think. You’re a good kid, Apollo. I’m good at reading people, so I trust my instincts about this stuff, and I know, you’re a good kid.” Hafu says, leaning away from him.
“I don’t think you’re secretly some sort of monster or something. But the things that you’re capable of... you’ve learned ambient magic way quicker than you ever should have been able to. And even the best mages in the kingdom can’t do druidcraft. I don’t know what it is, but something is different about you.” Hafu says.
“What do we do?” Apollo asks.
“Well, we keep training, obviously. I’m not giving up on you, I promise. But you have to promise not to do that unless I’m supervising, okay?” Hafu asks.
Apollo nods.
“Okay. Good. everything’s gonna be okay, alright Apollo?” Hafu says.
“Right.” Apollo replies.