Chapter Text
Yeonjun wakes up with a pained groan as he tries to turn on his back. To use a park bench as a bed isn't the most comfortable choice itself, but to lie on it covered in bruises? And possible fractures? Yeonjun wouldn't recommend trying.
But it's not like Yeonjn expected any good sleep. Throughout the night, he shivered from the cold and icy breeze, and no sweater or bomberjacket was enough to shield him from it. So in summary, he slept around two to three hours - nowhere near enough, but is there really another choice? The sun is already shining down on his face in mid spring, the bird are chirping and children play soundly in the distance. It's a beautiful picture, if only Yeonjun wasn't still cowering on the bench, his hood up, own blood stainining his clothes.
Yeonjun never thought he'd be the reason why parents pull their children closer to themselves when passing by, or to be the source of pitiful gazes, but faith changes and god - as Yeonjun stated many times before - is a horrible man.
With a deep sigh, Yeonjun slowly pushes against the surface of the bench to sit up in the middle of it, hissing from the pain. At least the swelling of his eyes didn't increase too much, and Yeonjun still can see enough to reach for his backpack and retrieve a water bottle, taking small sips of water. The bottle has gone through a few kicks too, looking crooked and dirty, just how Yeonjun feels at the moment.
As he sits there and basks in his own bitterness, a couple walks by in front of him. Yeonjun wouldn't mind them a second glance, if the woman didn't turn around and carefully placed a few coins on the bench beside him, smiling sadly.
Too stunned to reply, Yeonjun looks at her walking back to the man, who shakes his head in disapproval. "He's only going to buy himself drugs from it." The voice fades as they continue their path down the pebbles way.
Yeonjun takes the money in his shaky hands and examines it carefully. At least he can buy himself some cheap ramen with. It's just a shame that he couldn't thank her a second ago.
After managing to get up even with his entire body aching, he finds a small convenience store around the corner, walking with a limp as he enters through the automatically opening glass doors. Once inside, he pauses and heavily leans against shelve, clutching his rips and suddenly feeling out of breath. His vision blurs and he feels like passing out any second, but composes himself through deep breathing. Only when the small black dots in his vision disappear, does Yeonjun inhale with more courage, taking another step.
Eventuelly, he finds cheap ramen. Thank god that the convenience store has a small kettle and chopsticks - Yeonjun wouldn't have any idea where to get them from.
With a grunt, Yeonjun drops the package on the counter and keeps his eyes averted, not wanting to look the cashier in the eyes. He knows how pathetic he must look, there's no need to see more pity - it honestly makes him feel worse.
But what he didn't expect, if for the cashier to let out a small whistle, scanning the package nonchalantly. "The last twenty-four hours didn't treat you well, huh?"
Yeonjun raises his tired and empty eyes, feeling a hint of surprise to see the girl with dark hair from yesterday, who gave him the directions to find the College Of Arts. "You could say that." His voice is hoarse and stained, finding that even talking hurts.
The girl contorts her face as she looks over the wounds and bruises on his face. "You look awful."
"Thanks." Yeonjun responds unimpressed and gives her the money. Then he walks down an aisle into the direction of the counter, starting the kettle.
"So... did you find him?" The girl asks absentminedly, loud enough for Yeonjun to hear him. "What was his name again?"
Yeonjun prepares the ramen with his eyes saddening. "Soobin. And no, I didn't."
The girl shrugs her shoulders and decides not to bother him any more, he's having a tough time as it is. But even after eating the food, Yeonjun doesn't move away from the counter, only sitting on the stool and watching the people outside of the store.
She glances at him several times throughout an hour before finally approaching him. "Look, I really don't want to be that kind of person, but I can't have you sitting here all day. Either you buy something else, or you gotta leave."
Yeonjun averts his gaze to the ground and nods his head, feeling downhearted and miserable, but at least he had a warm place to stay without the constant wind making him shiver. So he slides down the wooden stool with a repressed whimper and throws away the packaging, preparing to leave.
The girl watches with a sigh. God, this guy. "You can use the restroom of the store if you want. Freshen yourself up a bit, get some blood out of your clothes..."
Yeonjun shakes his head. "I don't think I can save them anyway." he looks down on himself and clenches his jaw, hating that he ruined the clothes Eunchae and Taeyung gave him. He should've been more careful.
Letting out a loud huff, the girl doesn't like how much sympathy she's feeling for him because she honestly didn't expect to play charity today. "You must have some clothes in that backpack, no? Go change and I'll bring you a plastic bag for your dirty ones."
With another sad sigh, Yeonjun nods and follows her into the directions of the small restroom. He closes the door after himself and comes face to face with his reflection in the mirror above the sink, wincing at his unrecognizable appearance. Yeonjun knows that he's - in some distinct and objective way - handsome, another advantage of being an angel, but right now he doesn't look like himself - he doesn't even feel like himself either.
Both his eyes are black and blue, there's a nasty cut on his cheek from the knife grazing his skin, and his lower lip is busted, the reason why he had so much trouble eating earlier. Aside from that, his skin is pale, and there's dark bags under his eyes. If Soobin weren't running after seeing him before, he'd definitely do it now.
Yeonjun cringes at himself once again, then strips off his jacket and sweater to carefully clean the sore skin with paper towels, the water warming in up in the meantime. It takes a lot of time to look like a human again. His upper body is just as colored as his face, but he's sure it will heal quickly due to his abilities.
Getting rid of the dry blood in his hair isn't that easy though, Yeonjun has to bend over to wash it with soap under the running water, grunting and hissing as he struggles to stay in that position while scrubbing his scalp. But to his luck, the girl with the short dark hair returns and knocks on the door, stepping inside to see his pathetic attempt.
She sighs and closes the door behind herself, moving to help him by gently slapping his hands away and doing the task for him. Yeonjun basically melts at the feeling of his head massaged, a small relief to his terrible time on earth.
"You're lucky the late shift just arrived." she says while being focused on her work, scraping through the strands. "And that I'm feeling generous today."
Yeonjun can't help the small smile, the wound on his lips stinging at the stretch. "Seems like I'm a lucky guy."
She smiles too - only a tad. "Don't pity yourself now, save some dignity."
Yeonjun closes his eyes and savors the moment of someone else washing his hair, even when the position becomes slightly unbearable. "There's nothing else I can do."
"Wrong." She responds with a click of her tongue. "There's a lot you can do. It sucks that you got roughen up, but you can't let that be the reason to give up on yourself."
"I'm not really in the mood for a motivational talk." Yeonjun turns his head to look at her with tired eyes, "I appreciate you trying, though."
The girl presses her lips together and rinses his dark hair under the water, then turns the faucet off, carefully squeezing the strands to get rid of the remaining water. "Yeah, I get that. I'm not one for motivational talk either."
Yeonjun forces a smile and straightens up, patting over his soaked hair with a paper towel. "Thank you."
She leans back and watches, drying her own hands. "I'm Yoshiko. But I prefer being called Hiko. Never Yoshi - I'll kill you if you call me Yoshi."
"Hiko." Yeonjun repeats with the smallest smile, glancing at her through the reflection of the mirror. "I'm Yeonjun. Yoshiko is japanese, right?"
"Right." Hiko replies with a nod, "my parents are from japan, but I grew up here in Seoul."
Yeonjun dries his hair as best as he can and reaches for the backpack to get new clothes, slipping into a new sweater. He catches Hiko glancing at his torso, but it's probably more due to the eye-catching skin discoloration than anything else. "It's a pretty name."
Hiko snorts at that. "You're a charming one, aren't you?"
Yeonjun smiles a bit wider. "I'm always saying the truth."
After noticing that Yeonjun fishes out new jeans, Hiko walks out of the restroom to give him some privacy before returning after ten minutes with a chair and a first-aid kit. "You should probably go to the hopital, but I have a feeling you might not have enough money for it, so an expired first-aid kit has to do for now." She places the chair in the corner and motions for Yeonjun to sit on it, "Also... I have exactly zero experience with taking care of wounds, so we're solely depending on my Grey's Anatomy knowledge."
Yeonjun smiles weakly and sits down, looking up when Hiko stands in front of him, spawling out the utensils in the sink. "Sounds promising."
Hiko glares at him, but there's little bite to it. "I'll enjoy to disinfect your bruises."
Yeonjun chuckles, but hisses instantly, holding the side of his chest with his jaw clenching. "What's a little more pain?"
At that, Hiko actually softens her expression, sighing and shaking her head. "There's a way to repay the bills when you go to the hospital later." She gently places two fingers under Yeonjuns chin to raise his head, examining the wounds with a frown. "You need proper treatment."
"It'll heal, don't worry about it." Yeonjun says with a small smile, trying his hardest not to make any more pained sounds when she starts disinfecting the cut on his cheek.
"Men." Hiko murmurs and scrunches her nose, then continues to pat the ointment onto the wounds, "I'm sure this one needs stitches. Though, at least you'll look badass with a scar on your cheek."
Yeonjuns mouth curves up slightly. "Didn't take you for having a positive mindset."
"Just not in the mood to argue some sense into an idiot."
"I'm quite the idiot, I give you that." Yeonjun agrees defeated.
Hiko smiles and focuses on her task, glancing up only for a second to make eye contact before returning to put the ointment on. "Why did you get roughen up?"
Yeonjun saddens at the memory and shrugs his shoulders. "They felt like it - 'Had too much pent-up frustration,' - one of them said."
"What an asshole." Hiko rolls her eyes and shakes her head, "really just wanted to feel superior by beating someone who couldn't really defend himself."
Yeonjun frowns and gulps, the awful feeling of being pathetic and weak returns like a punch in his guts. He doesn't really want to awknowledge the fact that he was incapable of doing anything, being completely at their mercy like a feeble little kid. So vulnerable and insufficient.
Hiko notices the struggle in his downcast expression, still patching up his wounds. "It's not your fault, you did nothing wrong."
Yeonjun frowns some more and looks up into her eyes. "I could've fought harder."
"Sounds like it was multiple guys against one. It was unfair either way, no matter how much you fought." Hiko isn't the type of person to reassure or even care about strangers, but she can't deny that it somewhat breaks her heart to see the enthustiatic and friendly guy from yesterday losing all sparks because of some sardistic bastards who enjoy to humiliate others. "You didn't deserve any of that. you hear me? There's limits to strengths, and a group of men with - what looks like a knife - would've been the limit for everyone."
Yeonjun hums and averts his gaze again, eyebrows still furrowed. He can't tell her that he isn't a human, he's supposed to be stronger and should've handled it better, but he simply couldn't.
"Do you live nearby?" Hiko asks with a small smile, "I could help you get home? Definitely not for safety, I like to think that I can handle a group of men, but it's certain that I won't." She finishes with her task and throws the bandages back into the kit, closing it and hoping that no one will ever see this disaster. "But a bit of company won't add to the aches."
Yeonjuns frown eases out as he returns the weak smile. "It depends on the company." he says cheeky. "And I have to figure something out first. I don't really have a home."
Hiko blinks at him a few times, obviously scandalized. "You're telling me that you traveled without finding a place to stay first? You just stepped into the train without a plan?"
"Uh.." Yeonjun doesn't dare to meet her eyes, squirming nervously, "Something like that."
"God, you're seriously such an idiot." She groans out frustrated. "What am I going to do with you?"
Yeonjun relaxes a bit as he chuckles. "Nothing, I can take care of myself, Hiko. You've helped me enough as it is. Thank you for... everything."
Hiko shakes her head and clicks her tongue. "You expect me to hear that you're homeless, freshly beaten up, probably spent the last money on some ramen, and just wish you good luck to survive further?"
"Yes?" Yeonjun tries with a small smile, but tenses when she glares at him furiously. "No. Sorry."
"Yeah. Absolutely not." Hiko sighs and reaches for her phone, thinks for a second, before typing on the screen, "I have a friend at the dorm. He doesn't have a roommate yet, so maybe you could use the other bed secretly."
Yeonjun slumps in the chair. "You don't have to do that for me. I'll be fine on my own."
"As fine as you were last night?" Hiko asks harshly, but she takes a deep breath to relax when Yeonjun clenches his jaw and looks down at his fingers fumbling with the hem of his sweater. "Sorry, I didn't mean to be a bitch. I just don't want you to get hurt again."
Yeonjun bites his lower lip and doesn't know how to reply, only nodding and exhaling.
The phone chimes, and Hiko smiles relieved at the message. "He said he wouldn't mind a night or two. That's good, right?" Yeonjun doesn't look very impressed, but still nods and gets up to follow her, swinging the backpack over his shoulder.
♡♡♡
Yeonjun still limps as he walks beside her. His body aches, especially the side of his chest, but he can push through the pain. No big deal. "Where are we going?"
"Oh, you'll love where we going." Hiko says with a playful smile, rounding a corner with him to reveal the building. "Pleasant surprise, huh?"
Stopping in his tracks, Yeonjuns eyes widen as he realizes what she means. The modern building is more marvelous than he assumed when he saw it on the Vision table, much bigger, the screen couldn't do it any justice. What it lacks in hight, it makes up in lenght. The college is almost forming a circle with it's connecting parts, taking in a large amount of space with what seems to be a small forest right behind it.
"Is that.." his voice trails off as he still realizes where he is.
"Your destination?" Hiko suggests, still smiling. "And you can visit Soobin? Like you planned on doing?"
Yeonjun gulps and nods his head, but his stomach turns again. He planned on doing that, yes. But he doesn't want to step in front of Soobin with that face - or mentality. Yeonjun has had enough pity for a lifetime, he wouldn't be able to handle if Soobin looked at him with that gaze as well. Or worse - try helping him. It would only add to the helplessness Yeonjun feels.
"Yes, I'll visit him." Yeonjun finally chooses to say, forcing a smile. "Just not today."
Hiko hums and doesn't comment on that, but her eyes stay on Yeonjun to search for any answers why he wouldn't want to see Soobin. "Alright. Let's go meet my friend then."
They resume on walking to the main entrance and take the elevator near it, all while Yeonjun looks around with big and curious eyes, seeming awestruck. Later, they pass many doors until stopping at a random one. Hiko glances quickly at Yeonjun with a smile, then knocks and waits for her friend to answer.
A handsome boy in his twenties eventuelly opens the door, already grinning as he sees Hiko, but his expression instantly falls when switching to Yeonjun. "Shit dude, you're covered in bruises."
Hiko rolls her eyes. "Yeah, thanks for telling us, Taehyun. We wouldn't have known otherwise."
Taehyun chuckles, seemingly unbothered by her sarcasm, and steps aside, silently inviting them in. "Well, aren't you a ray of sunshine."
Hiko huffs and guides Yeonjun into the small space of the dorm room, where they find another guy sitting on the bed. "Hey, Hiko. Who's your friend?"
Taehyun closes the door after them and moves to return to his space on the bed. "Yeah, who's your friend, Hiko?"
She simply groans in annoyance and nods for Yeonjun to sit down on the other unoccupied bed. "That's Yeonjun. He just needs a place to stay for a few nights." Hiko then walks to the small refrigerator, handing Yeonjun a small bottle of water, sitting down next to him. "Those are Taehyun and Kai. Some good friends of mine."
Taehyun whistles and opens the window to get the smoke out. "Finally you're admitting it. We have to mark the day, Kai. Can't believe Hiko called us good friends. What a miracle."
Kai snorts and Hiko rolls her eyes, telling them to shut up.
"It's nice to meet you." Yeonjun says with a weak smile, although he still feels downcast and exhausted. "Thank you for letting me stay the night."
"No problem." Taehyun responds with a gentlier voice, smiling back. "Any friend of Hiko, is our friend. Do you want to smoke?"
Hiko gasps and frowns at him. "Stop ruining him already."
"What?" Taehyun in defense, raising his hands, "He looks like he might need it."
Yeonjun watches their interaction silently, the smile staying, but it loses it's genuineness.
Kai shakes his head. "You're always so protective, Hiko. Relax."
"Don't tell me to relax, idiot." Hiko gares at him and kicks his shin, pleased to earn a hiss. "No joints for Yeonjun. Or any alcohol. We're not starting any unhealthy coping mechanism."
Taehyun laughs lightly and nods his head. "Yeah, alright. We just finished one anyway. Anyone in the mood to order food?"
Kai perks up with a bright grin, still rubbing his shin, but he looks enthusiastic with the prospect of eating food. "Is that even a question?"
Hiko smiles and nods her head, turning to face Yeonjun beside her. "What do you want to eat?"
Yeonjun shifts nervously when everyone looks at him expectendly. "I don't have any money on me." - his voice raises a bit as he reassues with - "But you can order yourself something, I don't mind. I ate not long ago."
"Ramen." Hiko adds unimpressed. "You ate a small package of ramen, and that was approximately two hours ago. Now tell me, what do you want to eat, Yeonjun? I'm not playing games. Be warned."
Yeonjuns breath hitches a bit when she looks at him with dark eyes. "Something very cheap."
Hiko rolls her eyes and snatches the phone out of Taehyuns hands. "Out of spite, we're going all out today. Is there a way to order lobster and caviar?"
Taehyun snorts and shakes his head, grinning at Yeonjuns alarmed expression. "Don't worry, she won't actually do that. Her part time job doesn't allow her to back up the stubbornness."
Grumbling to herself, Hiko doesn't agree to that, but hands the phone to Kai after selecting for her and Yeonjun.
"We're getting pizza everybody." Kai announces teasingly, laughing as he scrolls through the suggestions. "What a surprise."
Taehyun smirks at Yeonjun and wiggles his eyebrows playfully. "See?"
Hiko scoffs loudly and presses her lips together, "Someday I'm going to punch that grin out of your face."
"What? With those little fists?"
When Hiko gets even more furious, Yeonjun cringes at the threat. He knows it's a joke, but after experencing the moment where it wasn't one, it's hard to laugh along. He doesn't want to be the buzzkill, so he smiles and fiddles nervously with his sweater, pulling the sleeves over his hands.
Hiko notices the squirming and takes a deep breath to calm herself down, understanding that this isn't the moment to joke about violence. "So," she claps her hands, wanting to cry out loud when Yeonjun flinches at the sound, "Yeonjun has a question for you guys."
Because of that, Yeonjun looks at her confused, "I do?"
"Yeah, you do." Hiko motions for him to continue, nodding into the direction of the other boys, "The thing... if they know Soobin?"
Yeonjun parts his mouth in understanding and nods his head, then shifts his gaze to them. He doesn't really want to ask around right now, hence why the question didn't cross his mind, because what if they do and invite Soobin? What if they meet without Yeonjun being ready for it? So he chuckles awkwardly. "No, it's fine."
But Hiko doesn't get the hint. "Nonsense." - she looks at Taehyun and Kai with a smile, "Do you know a student by the name of Soobin?"
Taehyun hums and thoughtfully averts his gaze. "Sounds similar. I think there's one in our singing class." he turns to Kai, "What was his last name? Choi?"
Kai nods and snaps his fingers. "Yeah, that's it. Choi Soobin."
Yeonjuns blood runs cold. Somebody actually knowing Soobin is different from being just concious about Soobin existing in this world. There's a path - a possibility that they could meet through them. Yeonjun knows Soobin is real, but in that moment he actually realizes it. He isn't a fragment of his imagination, he isn't as unreachable as he was before - Soobin is real, and Yeonjun is terrified of that.
Hiko - again - doesn't get the hint. "Really? That's good." She bumps her shoulder against Yeonjuns gently, "Did you hear? They know Soobin."
Yes, he did hear. Yeonjun gulps and wants to cry himself to sleep for some unknown reason. He should be happy and enthusiastic, impatient about meeting the love of his life, but Yeonjun can't help himself. He doesn't know why he's feeling like this.
"Where do you know him from?" Taehyun asks in a calmer voice, "Are you friends?"
Yeonjun reminds himself to breathe and looks up, mustering up a fake smile to hopefully hide the inner tumult. "Not really. It's just... it's complicated."
Kai smiles at that. "Really? Can't imagine anything complicated in Soobins life."
Yes. Yeonjun shifts and looks at Kai more intently. He wants to hear more of Soobin. He wants to listen to peoples stories of interacting with him, wondering if they are just as in love. "Why is that?"
Kai shrugs his shoulders with his eyes staying on the phone, leaning back against the wall behind the bed. "He's easy going and calm. But then again, I don't really know him that well."
Yeonjun smiles a bit to himself. Kai is right about his intuition, Soobin is a calm giant with a preference for the small and simple things in life, he's not the guy to seek danger or anything remotely complicated.
Hiko snorts after realizing what Yeonjuns school-girl grin means, but she decides against teasing him, especially in front of the others. Even when it's playful, Yeonjun has gone through enough humiliation in a short span.
Some time passes, and the topic changes. It's mostly Hiko talking to her friends, but Yeonjun joins in every now and then. It's clear that he doesn't fit into their friendgroup - even more after what he went through. It turned Yeonjun a bit more sad and bitter, so he's not really the life of the party today.
The food arrives, and they eat it with a movie playing on Taehyuns laptop, cramping together and watching the monitor on a chair between the two beds. It's not very convenient, but Yeonjun feels somewhat comforted in that space, almost forgetting that yesterday actually happend. but as soon as he moves a single limp, he's reminded all too well.
Yeonjun waits until they finish the food, waits until Hiko and Kai say their goodbyes, waits until Taehyun falls asleep on the bed next to him - to quickly slip into his shoes and jacket and quietly close the door behind him. He knows Hiko would call him an idiot, but Yeonjun can't allow to be nourished off of someones money and time again. They are college students and barely can take care of themselves, Yeonjun doesn't want to be that kind of burden.
Yeonjun comes to realize that he's taking too much of the people around him, it has to stop somewhere, or Yeonjun will get used to taking advantage of their kindness. That's not the person he wants to be.
That's why he's escaping. Not because he didn't feel welcomed - Hiko and her friends have been awesome the entire time. No, it's because Yeonjun needs to get a grip and stop depending on everyone else. Even when it means to embrace the icy breeze that feels like a thousand needles on his skin.
So after walking a few blocks, Yeonjun feels relieved to see an abandoned warehouse. There's an old and dusty mattress in the corner by the entrance, and Yeonjun sighs as he approaches it. It's not going to be comfortable, but that's life, right? He'll get used to it. He has to.