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See, Keith wasn’t even supposed to be on this mission. 

He was supposed to be with the Blades of Marmora, supervising a shipment through one of the dodgier trade routes. But the route was deemed too dodgy, the shipment was canceled, and Keith was wondering if he had ever seen a more suspicious drink than the one he was holding. 

He was still a little vague on how it ended up in his hand. 

They were on Xaliga, a small, watery planet tucked so perfectly into a larger planet’s orbit that it would be the ideal secret trading port. Allura had made it clear that morning that they were to do anything they needed to in order to retain this alliance. 

It was always mildly worrying whenever she brought that up right before they landed. 

And before they could even enter the gates to the planet’s capital, they were stopped by a wave of aliens. 

The Xaligas would’ve looked human, if it wasn’t for their bright pink skin and four eyes. Their smiles were full of sharp teeth that spoke too quickly and the translator in Keith’s helmet struggled to keep up with their language. 

Because Keith still wasn’t sure why they were insistently gesturing for the paladins to drink the strange concoction. 

It was a ghastly purple, so violently violet that it made Keith’s teeth ache just looking at it. Hunk, standing beside him, took a sniff of his goblet. 

Keith followed suit. 

It smelled like nail polish.

Keith straightened, turning to Shiro. “You must be joking.”

Shiro dutifully ignored him, watching carefully as Allura and a leading Xaliga spoke with a lot of hand waving and nodding. 

“Is this poison?” Lance whispered a little too loudly in front of Keith. 

Pidge beat Keith to it, kicking Lance to shut him up. 

Lance squawked, trying to keep his own goblet of mysterious liquid from spilling. 

Keith’s eyes were involuntarily dragged to where Lance’s lips pulled downward, the disappearance of a dimple before it returned again.

He gripped the goblet tighter. 

“Alright,” Allura spun towards them, her smile strained. “This could get awkward.”

“I was right, wasn’t I?” Lance nodded sagely. “It’s gonna give me a boner, isn’t it?”

Allura, to Keith’s mounting horror, shrugged . 

“That depends on how humans react to truth serums, I suppose.”

Lance’s mouth fell open. 

Keith stared into the depths of purple, and felt the heat of panic crawl up his throat. 

***

Once, over two deca-phoebs (four, if you were counting a time-traveling expedition on a space whale) earlier, Keith had overheard Allura and Shiro talking late one night. 

Keith couldn’t remember why he had been in the kitchen, whether he had been hungry or restless or wound tight from too many bad dreams. But he had slowed by the entrance of the main control room, hearing Allura and Shiro talking softly. 

Always a little too nosy for his own good, Keith pressed himself against the wall, a breath from the entrance, and listened. 

“I mean, it’s everywhere,” Allura whispered wildly. “I’ve never seen news spread as quickly as this.”

“I can’t believe it,” Shiro murmured. “This much coverage on Voltron just from Keith tripping.”
That caught Keith’s attention. 

He dared to peek into the room and was assaulted by a mirage of blue and red. 

It took him a moment to understand what he was even looking at. Because there was no clear reason in the entire galaxy as to why there was a photo of Lance holding Keith like that. 

It was plastered on every screen in the room. Keith was dipped back, held up by Lance gripping his waist. They were both caked in dirt and sweat. Lance’s brow was split while Keith’s nose was bleeding. They were looking at each other in the photo, Lance’s lips tilting into something teasing while Keith looked confused and a little annoyed. Their paladin armor was pressed together, Lance’s chestplate clearly digging into his neck. 

The memory of the silicone digging in yanked Keith back. 

It had been at the end of a fight. A simple dispute between some lingering Galra and a new trading post. Keith had been dazed from receiving the butt of a laser gun to the nose and stumbled. Lance had caught him and apparently the war stricken trading post had reporters. 

He remembered what Allura and Shiro had been saying. 

This was everywhere? 

Keith stared up at the photo for a moment and found he was mortified. 

“Look at this,” Shiro swiped through article upon article, all different alien languages. “All of these are articles just wondering whether or not Keith and Lance are together.”

“They are going to be horrified when they see this,” Allura giggled. 

Keith couldn’t agree more. 

Shiro chuckled. “Despite how entertaining their inevitable freaks out will be, we have to ensure this dies down quickly.”

“Why?” Allura asked. “Isn’t this amount of recognition good? More planets are writing about Voltron than ever before!”

“They are writing about Keith and Lance,” Shiro replied, “as a couple. That’s a dangerous play.”

“How so?”

“For starters, half the galaxy is in love with Lance.”

Keith bit back a scoff before it left his mouth.

“Half of the positive coverage we get is already because of how friendly Lance is,” Shiro swiped through more articles. “People tune in to watch him, they root for him and, in turn, root for us.”

“I see,” Allura pressed her lips together. “And the two as a couple could be divisive.”

“Imagine if new outlets started theorizing they broke up,” Shiro continued. “Or that one of them was cheating, there’s already more than enough photos of Lance flirting with aliens. The defender of the universe would be seen as a soap opera. Our support could diminish from rumors alone.”

Allura was silent for a moment. 

“Well,” she laughed lightly. “It’s a good thing they can’t stand each other.”

Keith nodded in agreement. 

But something shifted in his chest, sinking to his stomach like a stone. 

***

Half the galaxy is in love with Lance. 

Two (four) deca-phoebs later, Keith could see the irony. 

*** 

The goblet shook ever so slightly in his hand. Keith swallowed back the panic tightening his throat. 

“It shouldn’t last longer than a day,” Allura was saying quietly. “I’m still a little unsure of the alchemy of it, it has herbs and plants I haven’t heard of. But Coran is doing a check now to ensure it’s not poisonous.” 

“You still haven’t answered why we have to drink it!” Pidge hissed. 

“Or what exactly this is going to do,” Hunk moaned. 

“It sounds simple enough,” Allura was clearly trying to sound reassuring. “You just, well, tell the truth.”

The five of them stared at her. 

Keith’s knees threatened to waver. 

“Something with the chemicals of your brain, it-it doesn’t hurt, you just say whatever you’re thinking.” 

“Oh joy,” Pidge said tonelessly, staring into their goblet. 

“They are an untrusting bunch,” Allura lowered her voice to a whisper, glancing over her shoulder towards the Xaligas. “To arrange an alliance, we must drink it.” 

Keith could feel his breathing teetering into something unsteady. 

“Right, erm,” Allura grimaced, kneading her hands together. “I hope no one is holding any grudges against each other, because it’s all coming out now.”

It was almost comical, the way the other paladins all looked between Lance and Keith. 

Lance clutched his chest, mouth falling into something dramatic. “I’m deeply offended.”

“Shut up, Lance,” Pidge swatted at him. “Come on, if anyone had any grudges to let go of, it would be you two.”

“Yes, but you see, Keith and I are best friends!” Lance sang, shooting Keith a wink. “Ain’t that right, Keithy?”

Lance admittedly had a point. Lance serving as second-in-command had caused them to grow close. Closer than Keith had ever expected. He had never thought Lance would become someone he could work with, confide in, lead with. But despite all the jokes and flirts and dramatics, Lance was–. 

It was hard for Keith to put a word to it. When it came down to it, to that strained second between heartbeats in battle, Lance was always calm and focused. He never looked panicked or nervous when he peered through the lens of his bayard. 

He supposed Lance was steadying. He steadied Keith. 

He did it for all of them. He calmed them in those defining breaths, keeping the team level-headed in those times when they were all a little too young for war. 

Keith had only noticed Lance’s effect on them a deca-phoeb or so earlier. 

It was after they had won a battle but suffered too many casualties. Too many innocents had been caught in the crossfire. Lance spent the night pinning each of them down and smearing face masks on them. They had all resisted, had snapped at him and probably said things they regretted. But Lance didn’t relent, not until it all grew ridiculous enough to laugh. 

And once Keith noticed this, he could never look away. 

Keith’s fingers throbbed from how hard he was gripping the goblet. 

Lance was watching him expectantly, waiting for his agreement. 

Keith, feeling vaguely as if he may be sick, managed a nod. 

Lance hooted in approval, tilting his goblet towards Keith in solidarity. Hunk chuckled and Pidge rolled her eyes and Shiro relaxed slightly and Lance had once again done his part. 

Lance had once again calmed them. Steadied them. 

Allura was smiling fondly at him as she listened to Coran. 

“Right,” she took off her helmet, nodding for them to do the same. “It won’t poison us, but we will be saying just about anything we think of until breakfast tomorrow. So let’s try to keep our minds focused.”

Lance held up his hands. “Listen, everyone, I apologize in advance.”

Pidge rolled their eyes. “Can I just preemptively tape Lance’s mouth shut?”

Keith whipped to face them, hope dawning. Maybe he could just convince them to wire his mouth shut.

“ Pidgeon !” Lance gasped. 

The Xaligas were peering over at them curiously, definitely wondering why they were taking so long. 

Keith felt his blood pressure climb, fingertips numb as he clenched and unclenched his fist around the drink.

“Guys, come on,” Shiro sighed. “No taping mouths. That defeats the whole purpose of this. They need to hear us.”

Any sense of hope died a painful death in Keith’s chest.

He stared into the neon purple concoction and wondered if it would be his death sentence. 

“Shiro,” he said out of the corner of his mouth. “I can’t drink this.”

“Why?” Shiro asked through his smile. 

Keith glanced over to where Lance was asking if any of the Xaligas had heard of bendy straws. The aliens, as per usual, were enchanted by him. 

“ Because ,” Keith’s teeth were locked shut to keep from chattering. “It might cause an intergalactic incident.” 

Shiro’s eyes widened ever so slightly. “That’s a good reason.”

“Please,” Keith was begging at this point, that’s fine, he wouldn’t lose much sleep over it, “Shiro, please, I need you to get me out of this.”

Shiro stared at him. “Keith, what did you do ?”

“I didn’t, I–,” Keith choked on his own words because Lance was fucking chugging the truth serum.

Keith felt his jaw drop, helplessly staring at Lance’s neck, following each swallow underneath gleaming tan skin. 

Lance coughed, eyes watering as he shuddered. “Tastes like shitty tequila.”

“You’re crazy for that,” Pidge muttered before following suit. 

And suddenly Pidge was drinking it and Hunk was too and Allura began to cautiously sip hers and Keith thought he might actually die because the panic was beginning to close his throat. 

“Keith,” Shiro said softly. 

Keith felt his eyes burn as he looked up at Shiro. Shiro evenly held his gaze, eyebrows raised. 

Shiro would stop it. Keith knew he would. If Keith really didn’t want to do this, Shiro would figure it out. He always did. 

“You’re right,” Pidge sputtered. “It does taste like shitty tequila.”

“You don’t even know what that tastes like,” Hunk’s eyes were watering as he took his final swig. 

“Fine, I don’t, but if I did, I’m sure this is what it would taste like.”

“That doesn’t even make sense.”

As Pidge and Hunk tried to make sense of exactly what they were tasting, tongues loose with truth, Lance was staring at Keith and his obviously full goblet. 

Lance’s brow furrowed as he offered a confused grin. “Come on, Keith, join the party.”

Keith wanted to throw the goblet on the ground. 

But once Lance noticed, the others did too. 

“Oh God,” Hunk whispered. “We are about to learn something horrible about Keith. He probably killed someone, I bet he killed someone.”

“No way,” Pidge studied him decisively. “He definitely laundered money.”

“Pidge!” 

“What?” Pidge countered Allura. “You don’t see it? That’s the face of someone who’s committed fraud.”

In any other circumstance, Keith would’ve found that admittedly quite funny. 

But desperation was yawning open in his stomach, thick and cavernous and cold, sending wretched shivers up his spine. 

He couldn’t, he couldn’t do this. 

The leading Xaliga wouldn’t tear their eyes off him. And all four of them were suspicious. 

“Keith,” Shiro whispered. “If you can’t do this, you don’t have to. But I need to know now.”

Keith opened his mouth, but nothing came out. 

All of his friends were frowning the same confused frowns. Wondering what he had kept from them, what was so bad that he refused to tell people he would die for. 

Lance tilted his head, effortlessly handsome in the setting of the two suns above them. “Keith?”

He tried to hide the hurt in his voice, but it was there. Sharp like shattered glass inside his concern. 

It was then, watching Lance wonder what Keith dared to not tell him, that Keith found himself lifting the chalice to his lips. 

It wasn’t a hard choice.

Do anything to get rid of that betrayed look on Lance’s face. 

The serum burned, scorching down his throat before turning as cold as ice. His throat spasmed as he yanked the chalice from his mouth, coughing. 

He stared at his feet as his brain shifted. He could feel the effect of the serum, could feel the locked doors of his mind creak open. He breathed sharply in and out of his nose, trying to gauge what would leave his mouth first. 

An embarrassing compliment? A confession of why he had been nervous? Or something even more emotionally constipated? 

He felt a hand on his shoulder. 

“You alright, man?”

Instinctively, he looked up. 

Caught the edge of blindingly white teeth in a worried smile. Sank into the disarming blue of Lance’s eyes and drowned. 

Keith felt his mouth open.

“I’m so fucking in love with you.” 

*** 

Lance turned his neck, letting out a sigh as he massaged the sore tendons.

“Sorry man, I’m so tired I’m seeing God do the splits at this point, you gotta run that by me again.”

Keith rolled his eyes, pressing his finger even firmer against the blueprints. 

“If we come in through the air ducts here, then their heat sensors will sense us. We have to come in from below.” 

“Below where the blasters are waiting to warp through light speed?” Lance asked dubiously. 

“They will be turned off.”

“But they can be turned on,” Lance argued. 

“Well, what’s your idea then?” Keith snapped. 

“Easy,” Lance shrugged. “Walk in through the front door.”

Keith stared at him. “It’s an airship.”

“It’s a figure of speech, dearest.”

“There is no front door.”

“It’s–,” Lance rubbed his forehead. “Why are we trying to sneak in while they are moving impossibly fast through space?”

“Because that’s the only way they won’t notice us.” 

Lance hummed thoughtfully, staring down at the blueprints. He scratched his chin. 

A clock counting the vargas somewhere in the castle clicked along with the silence. Lance tilted his head, still studying the blueprints. 

Keith felt his eye twitch. “What.”

“Did you ever go to that bar near the Garrison?” Lance asked. “It wasn’t that far, an easy bus ride down the street.”

“Of course I didn’t, I wasn’t twenty-one.”

Lance smirked. “Well I did. A couple times, actually. They served a mean mimosa, to my surprise.”

Keith ground his teeth together, waiting for Lance to get to the point.

“Want to know how I got in?”

“No, but I’m sure you’ll tell me.”

Lance’s smile only widened. “There was a bartender there. His name was Thomas. Sweet guy, but not a thought behind his eyes.” 

“Your point. Find it.”

“So one day, I walked in, profusely apologizing that I was running late. I grabbed an apron and got behind the counter. I was halfway finished with taking a guy’s order before Thomas realized what was happening. So he was all like, hey man, what do you think you’re doing? And I just looked up at him all confused and told him it was my first day working there.” 

Keith frowned. “That doesn’t make sense.”

“You bet it didn’t,” Lance snorted. “Thomas is calling his boss and I’m trying to look as pitiful as possible. Finally, good ol’ Tommy has to tell me that he’s not sure who hired me, but they weren’t looking to bring anyone on.”

“So?”

“So, I try to act all freaked out,” Lance grinned proudly. “I’m acting like I’m panicking a little but trying to be a good sport about losing the job. And so Thomas feels bad for me and gives me a beer, on the house. Never asked for my age once.”

Keith stared at him blankly. “That’s ridiculous.”

“Right?”

“And kinda shitty.”

Lance winced. “Listen, I did all kinds of crazy things to impress the ladies.”

Keith shook his head. “You failed to mention what this has to do with the air ducts.”

“You don’t see it?” Lance tapped the blueprints. “Forget about sneaking in. We just walk in, and confuse the hell out of them.” 

***

Three days later, they got full control of a Galra airship by Lance’s rather impressive impersonation of an alien monarch. 

It was ridiculous and impossibly lucky. 

But Keith realized that, unfortunately, Lance might in fact be one of the most clever people he knew. 

***

Lance stared at him. Frozen in that concerned smile, eyebrows slowly rising. 

Finally, he blinked. “I– what?”

A hand grabbed Keith’s shoulder and spun him around. 

“Keith,” Shiro looked absolutely gobsmacked, eyes wide and mouth hanging open. “Oh, shit .”

“I said that out loud,” Keith whispered, his tongue eager to betray in his mouth. “I knew I was going to, since we are apparently going to say whatever we think for who knows how long and Lance is literally all I think about–.”

“Stop talking, Keith,” Shiro’s voice rose an octave. 

“I want to,” Keith hated how his voice trembled. “I really, really want to, trust me, but I’m kinda freaking out right now and so my mind is freaking out so all I can think about is the fact that I just told Lance that I’m in love with–.”

Shiro clapped his hand over Keith’s mouth. Keith closed his eyes in relief. 

“Oh my God,” Pidge whispered. “This is even better than fraud.”

“Not now , Pidge,” Hunk moaned, tearing his hands through his hair. 

The aliens were watching curiously, murmuring to each other in their foreign chirps and chatter. They definitely sensed that something was going on, but Keith wondered whether they knew the magnitude of what had happened.

What Keith just did. 

Keith could feel the telltale prickle in his eyes. He wanted to melt into the grass, to disappear entirely. He couldn’t stop looking at the aliens ogling him, at Hunk pacing, at Pidge staring, at Allura looking dreadfully guilty. Lance hadn’t moved from behind him. 

He wondered if he would ever feel this humiliated again in his entire life. 

“Allura,” Shiro’s eyes didn’t move from Keith’s. “Explain the situation.”

She nodded, hurrying over to the Xagilas, clicking on her helmet and turning on her translator. 

“Okay,” Shiro’s hand trembled slightly over Keith’s mouth. “This is what we are going to do. Keith, you are going to go back to the castle. Considering the circumstances, the Xaligas will understand.” 

As Shiro spoke, gasps swept from the aliens listening to Allura. 

Eyes upon eyes found him, bright pink hands covering mouths in shock and excitement. 

Keith wanted to die . 

“Go to Coran,” Shiro continued. “See if he has an antidote to help it wear off faster. If not, you can stay in your room.”

Shiro looked around at the others. 

“That goes for anyone who wants to keep their thoughts secret.” 

Keith watched Shiro’s eyes linger behind him, settling on Lance for a moment before darting back to Keith. 

Shiro tried to hide it, but a sliver of raw sympathy slipped through. 

Keith closed his eyes. 

They were all putting it together. It’s why the aliens gasped. Why Pidge and Hunk were endlessly pacing and looking nervously between Keith and Lance. Why Shiro looked so pitying. Why Keith’s chest was caving in.

It was obvious after all. 

They all drank the truth serum. 

And Lance had little to say about Keith, if anything at all. 

Distantly, Keith could feel he was shaking. His teeth were chattering, fingers twitching in the gloves, the goblet dripping its ugly residue onto the grass. 

He wondered if this was what it felt like to break, to shatter completely.

Shiro cleared his throat. “Let’s go.”

He turned to the others. “I’ll be back once I drop off Keith.”

Keith bristled at that, he didn’t need to be dropped off , but Shiro was already hauling him away.

Accidentally, Keith looked at Lance.

Lance was staring at him, more shocked than Keith had ever seen him. 

And it was hard to truly shock Lance. 

But Lance looked like the world had flipped, twisted, and swallowed him. His lips were parted, brow furrowed. He seemed suspended in that stupor, paralyzed in the surprise. 

Keith selfishly drank him in. Swallowed mouthfuls of those miles of tan skin and the hitch and jut of muscle. Dedicated that one dimple and that dazzling smile that came with it to memory. 

Remembered any of it, remembered it all before the confused look now on Lance’s face. 

The confusion that was now fading into something terribly sad. 

“Keith,” Shiro let his hands slip from Keith’s mouth. “Why did you drink it?”

“Because,” Keith murmured. “They thought I was hiding something from them.”

Shiro looked close to crying himself. 

“If I had known,” he continued desperately, “I would have stopped it, Keith. I wouldn’t have made you do that.”

“I know.” 

Shiro clasped his shoulder. “I’m sorry, Keith.”

Keith stared up at the sky. “I know.”

***

“Keith,” Lance held out his hands, placating. “Here me out.”

Keith wasn’t too interested in hearing Lance out, considering that he had been the one to override the training bot and force Keith’s sparring to a stop. 

He was panting, trying to catch his breath, trying to swallow back the adrenaline, and Lance was dancing around him with a giddy smile. 

“No.”

“Okay, but,” Lance followed him, easily ducking under the frozen training bot, “I have an entire presentation prepared. Hunk thinks it’s really good.”

Keith scoffed, spinning on his heel and marching to the locker room. 

Lance jogged after him, dramatically clearing his throat. 

“Here, Keithers, are the three reasons why you should join us for movie night.”

“Pass.”

Lance clicked his tongue as they entered the locker room, all cool lighting and white tiles. Keith liked it. He found the endless white calming. 

“That’s not fair, you have to hear my points first,” Lance draped himself along a bench in the locker room. “Point one, you’ve been working yourself to death by exhaustion.

You should take a break. And if you don’t, it’s a bad idea to annoy the people that are in charge of your headstone.”

“Just throw me out the airlock then when I die,” Keith said dryly. 

“Funny,” Lance frowned up at him. “Funny, funny, little man.”

“I am not litt–.”

“Point two,” Lance counted his fingers. “You should hang out with the others.”

“I do hang out with them.”

“Meals don’t count.”

Keith glared into his locker. 

That didn’t feel fair.

It was stressful leading. Especially when you are shit at it. 

Shiro’s shoes were simply too big to fill. Keith was tripping over his legacy, stumbling his way through fights and generally being a terrible leader. It was hard to look any of them in the eye. Pidge, so smart with so many ideas but also so young. Hunk, so kind but endearingly fragile in a way. He couldn’t run them ragged, toss them into danger, and then ask to share the popcorn. 

“Point three–.” 

He threw his locket shut, craving the slam, wanting it to startle Lance.

It didn’t. 

Lance was still along the bench, staring up at him. 

Keith clenched his fists.

“Point three,” Lance repeated calmly. “Pidge found a DVD of Men in Black a couple planets back.” 

Keith stared at him. “Seriously?”

L ance dared to smile. “Seriously.”

*** 

Keith joined the movie night. 

How could he not? The comedic timing of finding a movie about aliens in an alien pawnshop was too delicious to resist. 

The others hid their surprise well, when Keith showed up. 

He sat on the edge of the couch, flighty and a little too ready to leave. 

By the end of the movie, he was sunk into the couch, his arm pressed against Lance’s. 

***

Keith locked himself into his room and changed his door’s passcode for good measure. 

He tore at his armor, panic causing his nails to scratch into his own skin. 

“ Fuck ,” he hissed as he ripped off his chestplate, fingers trembling. 

He threw it across the room, feeling little satisfaction from the sound when it hit the floor. 

He threw his bayard next. Then his arm straps. Then his shoulder plates. Everything and anything he threw as hard as he could, until he was left in his flight suit.

“Fuck,” he spun, digging his hands into his hair. “ Fuck !”
He kicked his helmet. It hardly moved, but something cracked. Explosive pain ripped up from his foot, so versatile it caused a shock of bile to rush up his throat. 

Keith gagged out a sob, dropping to his knees as he clutched at his foot. 

Humiliation seared acidic in his stomach as he locked his jaw around a cry of pain. 

A shudder racked through him, one of fear, maybe shock, perhaps a little of a mortification–.

There came the tell-tale beeps of someone dialing in the code to his door. The codepad buzzed, signaling the incorrect password. 

“Oh, of course .” 

Keith froze, the pain siphoning off as adrenaline poured into his system.

No way. 

There was no way that–

“Keith?” Lance called through the door. “Are you hurt? Let me in.”

Keith swore under his breath. So Lance heard his little temper tantrum. 

“You’re supposed to be making an alliance right now!” He yelled through the door.

“You’re joking,” Lance scoffed. “That’s a joke, right?”

Keith dropped his forehead to his knee with a groan. 

“You expected that after you dropped that little casanova on me, I would just sit in a council room for the rest of the day? Come on, Keith, give me some credit.”

“Go away.”

“Keith–.”

“ Lance !” Keith shouted. “I’m still– the serum–.”

He slapped a hand over his own mouth, shoving back things like I’m still trying to deal with the fact that I told you I’m in love with you and I allowed myself to hope just a little that you felt the same and so now I feel a bit empty on the inside because you stared at me with a mouth full of truth serum and had nothing to say. 

Lance swore through the door. 

“Right, uh, hold on!” 

Keith heard the sound of Lance running into his own room and the dull throbbing pain returning in his foot. With a groan, he slumped onto the floor. He pressed his forehead against the cool tile, wondering idly whether his life could possibly get any worse. 

Quick footsteps returned and something slipped under his door. 

Keith watched the notepad slide towards him, a pen hastily following. 

“How did you find this in the middle of space?” Keith said, tugging the notepad towards him with mild trepidation. 

“Coran bought them at the space mall, he thought they were fascinating,” Lance said lightly. “Alright, here’s the plan. I’m going to ask you a question. Write down your answer. Okay?”

Keith slowly lifted himself up to a sitting position, reaching over and swiping up the pen. “Fine.”

“Alright. Great. Perfect. Why did you scream ‘fuck’?”

Keith covered his mouth. 

“I can’t believe I told you I was in love with you,” he whispered into his fingers. “And I’m so fucking humiliated.”

He hastily scrawled I think I broke a toe on the notepad and shoved it under the door. 

Lance snorted as he read. 

After a moment, the notepad slid back under. 

Ow. :( Want a nap in a pod?

Keith shot the notepad back. No, it’s just a toe.

Lance’s response was quick. Idk i think toes are important. Don’t they keep your balance?

I think that’s for cats.

R u not one???? 

Keith couldn’t help a snort at that. He could hear Lance chuckling on the other side of the door.

Last time I checked, I’m not. 

Check again mister. 

Are you telling me my race? 

No no im suggesting it

I think that’s, like, really not allowed.

>o< omg 

Keith pressed his fingers against his mouth, fighting a laugh. With nothing else to say, he shoved the notepad back under the door with a chuckle. 

He was surprised when it returned. 

Should we talk about it?

Keith’s smile dropped. 

No. He crammed the notepad sourly under the door. 

It gently slid back after a moment. Okay. 

A lump grew in Keith’s throat. His eyes burned as he grabbed the pen. 

Can we just act like I never said anything?

If that’s what you want. 

It is.

Can i ask you one question?

Sure.

Why did you drink it?

Keith clicked the pen nervously, staring down at the notepad as he balanced it on his knees. The door was cool against his shoulder blades. He pressed himself firmly against it, steadying himself. 

Because you looked upset.

? 

I didn’t want you to be mad at me. 

The moment he heard Lance’s soft, stilted gasp, Keith knew he fucked up. He swallowed a groan, dragging a hand through his hair. An angry blush raked up his neck, flaring in his cheeks and ears. He had been perfect so far, had brushed it off, insisted they didn’t talk about it. And now, he had to go and be just a little too pathetic and–

The notepad slid. 

Never let any of your feelings about me control you. 

It was circled, underlined and surrounded by a variety of hearts and smiley faces. 

Keith stared at it, stared at the note, and found he wanted to cry. 

***

If Lance was going to flirt, he could have at least had the decency to not do it in front of the entire ballroom. 

Keith seethed into his glass of Nunvil, glaring over the rim as Lance pulled out the works for the alien. She was pretty, Keith had to admit, with all that creamy ivory skin and huge pink eyes. 

Keith had seen Lance flirt enough to know how it went. It was like a dance, a parade of memorized steps.

First, he would approach with a sweet smile. One that turned downright wolfish if he was obliged. Then, it was asking questions about them and admiring the sleek designs of whatever illustrious building they found themselves in. 

Keith dug his teeth together as Lance tilted his head towards the glimmering lights above them, pointing to them with a lazy finger around a flute. 

The alien giggled, nodding and saying something in Lance’s ear. 

He turned to her as he spoke, listening attentively. 

And then, a careful dip of his gaze to her lips. 

As usual. 

The alien blushed blue. Lance’s grin veered into something sly.

Keith took a long swig of Nunvil. 

“What’s got you drinking Nunvil?”

Keith jumped, nearly spilling his drink as Pidge fell into step next to him, looking thoroughly bored and eager to be entertained.

“Lance,” Keith cleared his throat. “Flirting yet again.”

Pidge squinted up at him. “So?”

Keith sputtered. “It’s unprofessional!” 

Pidge snorted. “Most of the aliens here will get drunk enough that they won’t remember. Besides, they all love him.”

“Yeah, half the galaxy is in love with him, I know,” Keith said sourly.

Pidge gave him a strange look. “Jealous that he’s the heartbreaker?”

“What?” Keith recoiled. “Of course not!” 

“Then why does it bother you?” Pidge chuckled. “We all have our ways to cope.” 

Scowling, Keith looked back over towards Lance. 

Who was now being led out of the room by the alien, smiling that dangerous smile. 

Keith’s grip nearly shattered the glass. 

***

Jealous. 

That word stuck with him for a little too long. 

***

The next morning, Keith stared at himself in the mirror. 

He looked exactly like he felt. His eyes were dull, bloodshot and lined with dark circles. His cheeks were gaunt and lips chapped. 

He looked terrible, no wonder Lance was interested–

Keith stopped himself short, ripping himself from that train of thought. 

He sucked in a breath, gripping the edge of the sink. “My hair is blue.”

As the lie easily left his mouth, he nearly crumpled in relief. 

Keith grabbed his bayard and was out the door. 

His vision tunneled as he marched down the halls. It was early, too early for the others to be awake. He greedily savored the silent morning, salivating over the thought of being left alone in a training room for vargas. 

He was running through all the training simulations in his head, wondering how many he could get through before Shiro would be up and ready to spar, when he entered the training room and stopped in his tracks. 

Lance was in the middle of the room, surrounded by twelve training bots. He had the bayard lifted to his chin, using the lens to aim and fire. His shots were effortless, seamlessly sending each training bot to the floor the moment they restarted. 

It went on for what felt like hours, Lance constantly turning and twisting and firing. Training bots crumpling, shuddering, and lifting back up again. 

Lance was wearing a simple T-shirt and sweatpants, his feet bare against the floor. Keith stared hopelessly at Lance’s forearms and felt his mouth go dry. 

Another spin and Lance spotted him. 

He staggered, lowering his bayard. “End sequence!” 

As the training bots all dropped, sliding back into the floors, Lance cleared his throat awkwardly. He offered a weak wave. 

“Morning.” 

A sudden surge of rage blistered through Keith. 

He wasn’t sure where it came from and who it was directed to. All he knew was that he couldn’t quite believe that not only was Lance awake and taking up his training time, but he had also apparently decided he was going to make this awkward. 

Keith swallowed biting insults and marched into the room. “I thought you would be asleep.”

“Couldn’t sleep,” Lance watched him carefully. “What about you?”

“Oh, I slept great,” Keith said dryly. “Truth serums will do that to me, I guess.”

Lance winced.

Keith knew he was being a bit of an asshole but he didn’t care.

He preferred for Lance to be pissed at him than be awkward.

“Okay,” Lance let out a low laugh, scratching the back of his neck. “I’m overthinking, I’ll admit.”

Keith felt a furious blush rise up his cheeks. “Don’t.”

“Look, I know,” Lance raised his hands in defense. “You don’t want to talk about it, I get it. But I don’t want to be a dick about it either.”

Keith felt his face grow hotter and hotter. “What do you need?”

Lance stopped. “What?”

“What do you need?” Keith bit out, crossing his arms. “So you don’t feel like a dick about it?”

Lance frowned. “I’m sorry, I’m not doing this right.”

But Keith was tired . He was exhausted and embarrassed and feeling a little trapped and a little bitchy because of it. 

He opened his mouth, inhaling deeply and prepared to unleash a ugly response. 

Lance squinted at him, clenching his teeth and very obviously bracing himself. Waiting to endure whatever Keith had to say. Whatever Keith needed to do to make himself feel better. 

Keith spun on his heels, marching for the door. 

“If you want me to stop being in love with you,” he snapped over his shoulder, “then don’t be so fucking understanding.”

***

Listen. Keith overall was a pretty chill guy. 

Especially with sexuality and gender and the overall loose definitions of them that came with traveling through space.

He didn’t concern himself much with the genders of aliens they met. He typically just listened carefully for any revealing pronouns and used context clues for the rest. He didn’t bother himself with their anatomy and was pretty damn good at minding his business. 

So he hated himself a little bit for staring hard at the pantline of the alien that Lance was flirting with. 

It had been so long since the last ball, where Keith had rolled around the word “jealous” in his head and wondered why it felt so intrusive. Keith had thought he had gotten over whatever that was. 

But now, for the life of him, he could not stop staring at Lance and the alien. 

The alien who, Keith swore, was decidedly male.

He felt shitty just thinking about it, not just minding his business and going with the flow. But he was trying to not panic. Trying to not go there.

Because he had only seen Lance with aliens that appeared feminine. He had never seen Lance interested in men and that was–

That was–

“Oh,” Hunk chuckled next to him. “Poor guy. About to fall into Lance’s trap.”

Keith felt his tongue go dry. “Guy?”

Hunk, assuming that Keith’s eyes hadn’t been trained on Lance all night, jerked his chin towards Lance and the alien. 

Keith started sweating. 

“I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised,” Hunk tilted his head. “He looks kinda like Kinkade. Remember him, from the Garrison? I always thought Lance had a crush on him.” 

***

Keith slept like shit for the next three days. 

His mind was spinning, he could not stop seeing Lance and the alien over and over.

Lance liked men too. 

***

By the next morning, Keith’s truth serum adventure had spread through the entire galaxy. Their com feed had crashed twice during breakfast, thousands of messages from random planets asking to meet Keith, to witness the infamous unrequited love, oh, and they would give a bit to the cause, sure, if they could see Lance awkwardly skirt around Keith. 

It was by all accounts a nightmare. 

It didn’t help that Pidge couldn’t keep a straight face, Hunk couldn’t look Keith in the eye, and Lance had yet to be seen that morning. 

Keith stabbed his goop miserably, listening to chime after chime of new messages. 

“Don’t be glum, chap,” Coran cheerfully clapped him on the shoulder. “You were doomed the moment you drank it. Their truth serum works best on Galra, quite understandably of course.” 

“Nice,” Keith said bitterly. “Thanks Coran.”

T he Altean nodded with a satisfied grin and danced back to the control room. 

The sympathetic silence was stifling. Keith could feel both Hunk and Pidge staring at him, and finally snapped. 

“ What? ”

Both Pidge and Hunk jumped.

“Nothing!” Hunk said quickly. “We just, well, I thought–.”

A spoon’s worth of goop nailed Hunk between the eyes. 

Pidge lowered their spoon, eyes flashing. “Don’t, Hunk.” 

Keith was really trying to keep calm. “What?”

“Forget about it,” Hunk said hastily, offering a sheepish smile. “I just, uh, didn’t know you had it in you.”

Keith’s eyebrow raised and the very familiar sour of a biting and bitchy response crawled up his throat. He had had enough. 

“What?” He snapped. “Didn’t think I’d be in love with Lance?”

Hunk’s eyes widened. “Keith–.”

“Please,” Keith rolled his eyes. “Have you not met him? Half the galaxy is in love with him!”

“Keith,” Pidge readied another spoon of goop. 

“Let’s count off all his award-winning attitudes,” Keith leaned back in his seat and tapped on his pointer finger. “He’s friendly, kind, smart, occasionally funny, and so insufferably gorgeous it makes me want to punch him in the face.” 

Pidge was pale. “Okay, um–.”

“He’s an actual beast with his bayard, one of the best sharpshooters I’ve seen, a hell of a guy to watch your back. His battle tactics are ironclad and he can talk his way out of just about any situation ever.” 

“Keith–.”

“He has the charisma of a love serum and I can’t breathe whenever he smiles at me.” 

“Got it,” Hunk nodded his head quickly. “You can stop talking about it now.”

“Why?” Keith snapped. “Everyone wants to know! The whole fucking universe is asking! So, why do I love him? How could I not ?”

Hunk and Pidge stared at him as if he was a ghost. 

It took another couple of frustrated glares to realize they weren’t staring at him. 

They were staring behind him. 

Keith felt his heart sink to his gut as he slowly turned around. 

Lance, sleep-rumpled with tousled hair and bleary eyes, was standing behind him. He was blinking quickly, mouth drawing into something both horrified and flattered. 

Keith was marching out of the room before he would have to hear Lance’s response. 

***

“Come on, man!” Lance tilted his head, cheeks flushed. “Are you taking it easy on me?”

Keith wished he could say he was.

He had no other excuse for how shit his sparring was. 

He stepped back, panting, and wiped his brow. “I figured you needed a win.”

Lance’s resulting smirk caused Keith’s bayard to nearly slip out of his hands. “Oh, really?”

Keith bit down on the inside of his cheek and nodded. 

Lance chuckled, and came at him again. 

He had gotten faster. He was quick and efficient with his bayard, even while it was shaped as a sword. Despite Lance using a moderately unfamiliar weapon, Keith had to work hard to keep up with him, blow for blow. 

A bead of sweat slipped down Lance’s jaw. Keith’s eyes followed it. 

Lance effortlessly kicked Keith’s feet out from under him. 

Keith hit the ground hard, taking the jolt of impact in his teeth. 

He blinked wildly up at the ceiling. What was wrong with him? 

A shadow loomed over him. Lance was smiling down at him, twirling his bayard. 

“Did you think I needed two wins?”

Keith huffed and accepted the hand to pull him up. 

Lance’s hand was warm. 

Keith, for a fraction of a fraction of a second, didn’t want to pull away. 

***

“Use it.”

By the way Lance, Pidge, and Hunk jumped, they hadn’t heard him enter the control room. Shiro and Allura only looked over with surprise, which Keith met with a scowl. 

Why wouldn’t he be here? 

After all, it was him that they were talking about. 

It was obvious, even despite how quickly Coran swiped the mass of articles off the screens. 

“Use it?” Shiro repeated. 

Keith tried to make his shrug as casual and unbothered as possible. “The, you know, truth serum thing. The whole reveal. We might as well use it to our advantage.”

Shiro frowned. “Absolutely not.”

“Yeah,” Lance lifted a finger. “I’m going to second that.”

“Why not?” Keith asked sharply, crossing his arms. “It’s out, everyone’s talking about it, everyone wants to see us, donate to us–.”

“Everyone wants to see you,” Shiro cut in. “Keith, they– this–.”

He trailed off, his glance between Keith and Lance not as subtle as he likely thought. 

Keith thought he would burst a blood vessel. “Speak plainly, I beg of you.”

Shiro looked pained. “Keith, come on–.”

“Fine,” Keith drawled. “I’ll say it. Yes, I know that the whole reason they are interested is because they all want to see the tangible awkwardness between me and Lance. Yes, I know that they are just going to pity me. Yes, I know that there will probably be a ton of weird questions asked and it will be a little terrible. But who cares? The entire universe is interested in Voltron.” 

“At your expense!” Shiro argued.

“Half the galaxy is in love with Lance!" Keith retorted. "And this makes him even more desirable. We should rely on that. We are more powerful separate, at least they aren't seeing us as a couple, right?" 

Keith shoved his back against the wall. 

Lance sank into the couch cushions. 

Shiro stared at Keith, calculating, as if trying to place him in a conversation four deca-phoebs earlier. 

Keith cleared his throat. “It’s fine. I’m fine. We might as well get something out of this.”

“Um,” Lance raised his hand, “don’t I get a say in this?”

“No,” Keith said dismissively.

Lance’s mouth dropped open in outrage. “Maybe I don’t want to be asked weird questions and stared at!”

“I thought you would be thrilled,” Keith said, “your loverboy image has only gotten better.”

Lance spun to face him, eyes flashing. “ Why would I be happy about that?”

Keith extended his hands wordlessly.

Pidge and Hunk wore matching winces. Shiro rubbed his brow with a sigh.

“Keith,” Allura said slowly. “Are you sure about this?”

“Yes,” he said firmly, before he could regret it. 

***

Keith felt the warmth of Lance’s hand in his for the rest of the night. 

A ghost of a memory lacing between his fingertips. 

He wasn’t sure why. 

***

The planet Fhasfos had the most coverage on the Keith and Lance debacle, beating the next planet by over five hundred articles. Coran send out a request to land the next morning, giving some garbage excuse about needing supplies. 

Keith looked in the control room, watching the flock of Fhasfosians wait outside the castle doors. There were dozens of them, all holding weirdly shaped reporting instruments. He counted ten cameras, twenty-seven microphones, and a whole bunch of tablets ready to record anything he said. 

“You don’t have to do this.”

Keith turned to see Shiro standing behind him. He looked older, sadder, as he looked over Keith’s shoulder to see the buzzing reporters. 

“I don’t care,” Keith said gruffly, turning back to face the aliens. “It’ll help.”

“Sure,” Shiro agreed easily. “But at what cost?”

Keith scoffed. “You’re reading too much into this.”

“What? You submitting yourself to an insane amount of emotional pain after enduring an extraordinarily public reveal of your most private secret? How could I read too much into that?” 

Keith huffed out a breath. “You’re worrying over nothing. I’m fine.”

“Keith,” Shiro sighed. “With all due respect, how could you be fine?”

“What am I supposed to be instead?” Keith spun around to face Shiro. “Torn to pieces? Crying in some corner and hiding in my room? Watching sad movies and stuffing my face with ice cream?” 

“I don’t know,” Shiro studied him. “What do you want to be?”

“I want to be fine!”

“Are you?”

Keith hated the way he hesitated. The way his tongue stilled, refusing to lie to Shiro, refusing to continue the charade. 

Something broke in Shiro’s eyes. He squeezed them shut, shaking his head and stepping back. 

“I’m stopping this, I’ll tell them that something came up–.”

Panic flared and Keith shoved past him, running out of the control room. 

He could hear Shiro yelling after him, but he was already typing in the code to open the gates. 

The sound was deafening. 

The Fhasfosians dove towards the lowering ramp, already shouting questions as Keith hesitantly walked down. 

“Keith!” One with glowing yellow skin stumbled through the throng, shoving what looked like a voice recorder in his face. “How are you faring in your heartbreak?” 

“Uh,” Keith fought the urge to recoil. “I’m managing.”

The look on the alien’s face was so intensely pitying that it made Keith’s skin crawl. 

“No need to lie, young paladin,” he said earnestly, “please, share your burden with me.”

And the rest of this planet, Keith thought as he eyed the recorder. 

He felt a hand on his shoulder. He turned to see Allura standing next to him, eyes darting meaningfully between him and the alien. 

“Oh, uh,” Keith cleared his throat. “Yeah, I’m–I’m really torn up about it. Been crying all night and stuff.”

Tears welled in the alien’s single eye.

“I’m just glad I have this cause,” Keith said slowly. “You know, saving the world is really getting my mind off it.” 

The reporters cooed and awed at this, typing feverishly on their tablets. 

“How is the relationship between you and Lance?” Another alien asked. “Will you two be able to continue to work together?”

“Of course,” Keith managed a grimace of a smile. “Half the galaxy is in love with Lance. And I’m getting used to being one of them.”

***

Keith’s interviews on Fhasfos caused ten different planets to revolt against their Galran control. They were revitalized by Keith’s plight, enamored by such a universal and trivial feeling of love seen in their greatest defender.

Donations poured in, alien civilizations tripping over themselves to give rare ship parts and weapons to the paladin that needed to save the world to get his mind off heartbreak. 

Lost love was something that any being on any planet could relate to. 

The elusiveness of Voltron gave way to a feeling of community. 

And the messages that weren't sympathizing with Keith were doting love notes for Lance. Earlier, he would have read them and gloated. Now, Lance barely touched him. 

Shiro had yet to openly admit that Keith’s plan was actually working. He avoided mentioning the progress at all, only sending worried glances Keith’s way whenever someone else brought it up. 

Allura remained at his side, constantly sending proud smiles his way. Keith wasn’t entirely sure whether she supported it, but she seemed determined to support him.

Pidge and Hunk were big fans, considering all of the rare technology that was gifted to them. 

But Lance seemed more distant than ever. 

He disappeared deep into the maze of the castle whenever they landed to do another few hasty interviews, only emerging once the castle left the planet’s atmosphere. And then he sulked and pouted around the castle for the rest of the night. 

Sometimes Lance would decisively walk up to Keith, opening his mouth and sucking in a breath as if he was preparing for the speech of his life. But then he would say something entirely random or just turn and march away without saying anything at all. 

Keith wasn’t entirely sure what his problem was. 

If his popularity had grown, then Lance’s had doubled. Their com feed was drowned with media surrounding the Pursued Paladin, the Heartbreak Hero, the terribly handsome warrior that couldn’t escape the raw hunger for him even in his own castle. 

If anything, Lance came out of this looking even better than Keith. 

The planets considered Lance devastating and Keith devastated, Lance adored and Keith adoring. 

So, for all Keith was concerned, Lance could suck it up and deal with it. 

He sure was.

***

“Hey man,” Lance leaned against the doorframe of Keith’s room, that easy smile on his face. “Got a question for you.”

"Hm?” Keith didn’t look up from where he was sharpening his blade.

“Did you get too busy for me?”

Keith jerked, nearly slicing off his pinky from surprise. He looked up at Lance. 

“What?”

Lance shrugged, still easy, still steady. “I dunno, man, we haven’t sparred in forever.”

He drew out the last word, dropping his head back against the wall, ensuring Keith saw every inch of his sharp jaw and long neck.

Keith swallowed. “Sorry.”

“Nothing to apologize for,” Lance dropped his head again, holding Keith’s gaze. “Just wanted to know what was going on in that big brain of yours.”

Keith returned his gaze to his blade, trying to think of how to respond. 

Because there was no way he could actually tell Lance what he was thinking. 

And that was new for them. 

***

“I think I just need a good distraction,” Keith put on a brave smile. “Do you know what’s great at distracting me? Explosives.”

The aliens rushed to copy this down in their notes.

Allura brushed her nose to hide a grin. 

***

Keith couldn’t sleep anymore. 

And that in itself was ridiculous. 

He was a paladin fighting for his life every day. He should be bone tired, unable to keep his eyes open. 

But he couldn’t sleep. 

He was doomed to stare at the dim blue lights in his room and be reminded of Lance’s eyes.

***

“What do I like about him?” Keith chuckled, letting his eyes slowly travel along the mass of aliens. “I mean, what’s not to like?”

The crowd cheered in agreement. 

***

Keith began avoiding Lance entirely, because the pieces were clicking together in his head and creating a image that he wasn’t the biggest fan of. 

Because it would be terribly impractical to deal with a crush in the middle of an intergalactic space war. 

***

“I’m probably ruined for life,” Keith nodded into the microphone. “But that’s okay, I’m just happy to be working with him. I want to stay with him, you know, even if it’s just as friends.”

The alien reporter bursted into tears.

***

It was stupid, the way Keith finally figured it out. 

It was also entirely accidental, clumsy in that way that truths liked unravel and set themselves free.

They were organizing a shipment on a nearby planet. 

Keith was taking inventory, the numbers blurring together until he heard laughter. 

He turned and saw Lance holding what looked like four alien children at once. He was spinning all of them in wild circles, chuckling as the children laughed uproariously. 

Lance’s smile glinted just right in the setting suns and he looked at Keith and winked and Keith felt the world open up under him. 

***

“Oh, I’ll definitely hold a torch for him for the rest of my life. I mean, have you seen him?”

***

He was in love with Lance McClain. 

***

“Let’s be real, I’ll probably die doing something super heroic like dying to protect him. Can we put money on it? How about this, if I die protecting Lance, you give Voltron five dozen battleships and–.”

***

The second Keith returned to the ship, he was grabbed by the front of his armor and thrown against the wall. 

His armor let out an awful screech as it slid against the sleek walling. 

“What the fuck is your problem?” Lance snarled in his face. 

Keith’s mouth immediately dropped open into something sarcastic. “Careful, I might fall in love with you if you–.”

Lance pressed him tighter against the wall and– 

Keith had seen him angry before but–

This– 

“What are you playing at?” Lance growled.  

This was new.

Because Lance’s eyes were narrowed into slits, the blue piercing and making Keith’s blood run cold. His teeth were locked into a snarl, lips twisted and hands trembling in Keith’s armor. 

Keith blinked wildly. 

“What are you–?”

“That interview,” Lance hissed. “Placing bets on whether you would die for me? What the fuck , Keith?”

“It-it was a joke!” 

“Tell me that again,” Lance breathed through gritted teeth, leaning in close. “Look me in the eyes and tell me it was a joke.”

Keith slicked his tongue over his teeth and looked into that endless blue. He could feel Lance shaking, he could hear the rattling breaths that Lance was trying to keep even.

They were close, too close, and Keith could smell Lance’s flowery shampoo and the spice of his body wash and the salt of his sweat and he may actually pass away if this continued for a moment longer so–

“Fine,” he ripped his eyes up to the ceiling, “it wasn’t a joke. Sue me for trying to get something out of my inevitably noble death.”

It was a dick move and Keith knew it. Shitty and he knew it. 

But he couldn’t let Lance look at him for a moment longer. Couldn’t let himself feel Lance against him for another second. 

If being an asshole stopped Lance from looking like Keith was already in his grave, so be it. 

Lance let out a toneless laugh and released him. He stepped away from Keith, wiping his mouth with the top of his hand and Keith sucked in a needed breath. 

“I’m talking to Shiro,” Lancec muttered. “I’m stopping this shit, it’s already so fucking out of hand.”

“Excuse me?” Keith snapped. “You can’t do that!”

“Oh, I certainly can, Shiro’s already sick over it. He’ll be glad for someone to take his side, considering you’ve got Allura, Hunk, and Pidge all over this–.”

“This doesn’t concern you!”

“Are you being serious right now?” Lance yelled, eyes flashing. “This concerns only me. I am fucking concerned , Keith! You can barely look at me but then you spend your afternoons waxing poetry about me! You can’t be at the same dinner table, but you can wager on how you will die for me! Do you understand how insane that sounds? How terrible that feels?”

Keith felt something in him snap. 

“Oh, I’m sorry you feel terrible,” Keith said coldly. “I’m sorry having someone be in love with you is so inconvenient.”

“Don’t say it like that,” Lance hissed, “like being in love is that casual, that everyday.”

“That’s because it is for me!” Keith shouted. “Every day, I am in love with you! Every day, I am stuck thinking about you and worrying about you. Every day, I relive that moment when I told you to your face and, with the same fucking truth serum in your stomach, you didn’t say it back!”

Keith’s voice tore and cracked. 

He cleared his throat viciously, hating the way his eyes burned, hating the way Lance was staring at him with his mouth open and eyes wide. 

“Me being in love with you hurts too much,” Keith whispered, feeling his hands shake. “I had to find a reason for it, something to make it worth it.”

He waved a hand between the two of them. 

“Because this,” he let out a watery laugh, “ sucks . It’s terrible and I hate that I ruined whatever we were, but it’s too late now. So if I can get some battleships out of this, I’m going to.”

Keith pressed his teeth together to keep his chin from trembling, and walked past Lance. His footsteps ricocheted through the foyer, bouncing off the walls until–

“It wasn’t.”

Lance’s voice was quiet.

Keith sighed, rubbing his forehead. “It wasn’t what?”

“The same truth serum.”

***

Some days, the generous days, Keith found it a little funny. 

It was atrocious, amusing in the same way divine intervention is. 

Because who in their right minds had time to fall in love in the middle of a war? 

He was supposed to be leading, to be steadfast and steady and pure perfection. 

And now he was avoiding his right hand man because he went and fell in love with him. 

A lifetime of feeling alone and not fitting anywhere, only to find his place alongside half the galaxy. 

***

Keith’s blood turned to ice. 

His feet stalled, lurching in his boots as he curled his fingers into fists. 

He stared at the open hall in front of him, but he wasn’t really seeing it. Just rewinding and rolling over Lance’s words in his head, not trusting them, not trusting himself. 

“What?” He asked softly. 

“Well, I don’t know,” Lance whispered, “it-it was the same, I guess. But it wasn’t as strong. I could fight it.”

Keith’s hands spasmed. 

He remembered what Coran said. 

You were doomed the moment you drank it. 

Keith’s lips parted. 

Their truth serum works best on Galra, quite understandably of course.

Of course it did. The Galra were the conquerors of the universe. Of course the Xaligans knew enough of their DNA to create a truth serum that would unlock their brain. Of course even a half-Galra like Keith would be completely undone by it. 

But had the Xaligas ever even met humans? Had humans even reached that far into space? 

He tried to think back to that day, to brush away the haze of panic and focus on the others. Had they said anything embarrassing? Confessed any secrets? He couldn’t remember anything too concerning. Keith had thought that they were too focused on him to spout any deep, dark secrets, but was it just because it wasn’t strong enough for them? 

Slowly, carefully, sure his heart was brushing a tripwire, Keith turned. 

Lance was watching him, the picture of devastation. 

His hands were shoved deep into his pockets, shoulders low and head bowed. Through his fringe, blue eyes watched Keith. 

“What are you saying?”

Lance swallowed. Licked his lips. 

“I’m sorry,” he said hoarsely. 

“Lance.”

“I– I didn’t know what was going on and I was so shocked. I never would have thought that–.”

“ Lance ,” Keith’s head was spinning, his heart rioting, “what are you saying to me right now?”

Lance lifted his head, eyes desperately scanning up and down Keith’s face and searching him, shifting through him, inside him, and Keith was shaking and probably close to passing out because this couldn’t be happening, there’s no way that this entire time–

Lance opened his mouth. 

And, in a grand cosmic cruelty, alarm bells ruptured through the still air. 

***

Eventually, Keith settled into it. Found some ease in the constant pining, the wishing and wanting and craving. 

If half the galaxy could manage without him, he could as well. 

***

Keith tried to calm down as he dove into Red’s flight pit. He tried some breathing exercises Shiro taught him and begged them to work because a Galran fleet had entered the atmosphere and he needed to focus and not fuck up the mindmeld with his splaying panic. 

But as he slipped into the mindmeld and joined the others in the air, he realized someone else had done it for him. 

The emotions slammed into him. There was first a bite of panic, a chilling certainty that he had screwed it up by not saying anything, he took too long to sort out his feelings and now look at the ruin he caused. Then there was the heat of anger. Pure, seething rage after enduring interview after interview, a horrific spill of privacy and deep secrets and aliens gobbling it up and licking the plate. 

Then came fear, a typical, overarching constant that only grew as they ripped up towards the battleships. 

And last a sliver of something else. It tickled, shy in its playfulness. Careful and curious and warm. 

Calm. 

Steady.

“Can someone,” Pidge’s voice was strangled, “turn that off?”

Keith blinked, torn from the curious warmth, to hastily whip his steering set to the right. He barely avoided a spaceship as it hurled past him. 

“Sorry.”

Lance’s voice was barely over a whisper but it rang in Keith’s ears. He gripped the steer tighter, breathing haggard. 

The emotions were all Lance. Raw like a fresh and weeping wound. He could feel Lance trying to fold it away, tuck it in, but it was like trying to catch smoke with your hands. 

“Everyone,” Shiro’s voice came in like an order, “ignore it. Focus.”

“ What happened?” Hunk asked wildly, dipping low in Yellow and plunging through a smaller ship. “Is that all you, Lance?”

“Definitely not all of it,” Keith admitted through clenched teeth, diving and tearing through another ship. 

A spark of amusement slipped through and Keith bit back a foolish smile.

“Guys,” Keith spun to avoid a barrage of lasers. “What did the truth serum feel like to you?”

“Is this the time?” Shiro asked sharply. 

“Listen, just, did you have to say anything and everything that you thought of?”

There was a pause, everyone was a little distracted by dismantling one of the larger ships. Blue narrowly missed being shot by a laser and Keith’s heart clenched as he watched.

“I guess not,” Pidge said finally. “It was more that I really really wanted to tell you guys all kinds of stupid stuff.”

“I definitely didn’t mean to tell Keith that I thought he killed someone,” Hunk admitted. “It slipped out, but I made myself stop talking after that.”

Made himself stop talking.

Keith let out a strained laugh of disbelief. “Wow. I must say I’m jealous.”

He could feel Lance’s smile. 

“Now that that’s sorted out,” Shiro sounded tired, “can we focus?”

“For sure, Shiro,” Lance said cheerfully. “It is now in my best interest to finish this battle as quickly as possible.”

Keith couldn’t stop the smile from growing. 

He was grinning by the time he dove under the largest ship, spinning in Red and preparing his laser guns to take out the blasters and–

He emerged on the other side to see the largest ion cannon he had ever seen. 

Pointed at him and humming to life. 

The coms shattered into his friends screaming. 

His hand slipped on the steer. 

The space around him crackled with energy as the cannon charged. His skin burned. 

And then a flash of blue, endless, endearing, disarming blue, and he was spinning. 

He stared at the Blue Lion, stunned still from where it had slammed into him.

“Guess you lost the bet,” Lance murmured. 

Keith's mouth dropped open, hands scrabbling for purchase, foot stomping on accelerates but Red wouldn't, Red refused- 

And then it was all ionic destruction and purple haze and Keith’s scream. 

*** 

“This alliance with the Xaligans is essential,” Allura said, meeting each of their gazes with a stern look. “We will do anything and everything we can to gain their trust, understand?”

“Sounds like we won’t be leaving without a blood debt,” Lance nudged Keith with a grin. “Sounds like fun.”

Keith smiled at him. 

After all, what was the worst that could happen? 

***

Keith had never landed Red worse in his life. 

The landing was more of a crash than an actual landing. Red slammed into the ground and all sorts of alarms began flashing on his control board. 

But he hardly cared. 

He leapt out of the cockpit, throwing his helmet to the side and tearing off towards where Blue had slammed into the planet's sand. She was on her side and Keith felt the lurch of panic as he got closer. 

The cockpit would be completely turned to the side, the door facing the sky. 

He didn’t know how he was going to get Lance out of there. 

He could feel that he was hyperventilating as he neared the lion, but found there was little point trying to correct. 

He knew that he wouldn’t be able to breathe again, not truly, until he saw Lance. 

Keith pleaded with every star in the universe as he clambered up Blue’s side, shoving open the door and dropping inside. 

The tilt of the cockpit caused him to drop six feet, slamming into the other side of the massive window. His ankle spasmed and something in his stomach jolted, but he didn’t care.

Lance was still latched into his seat, his entire body dangling down towards Keith from the unnatural angle. 

His eyes were dull, lips parted. Blood slipped steadily from a deep cut into his abdomen, staining the white armor an ugly crimson. 

“Ow,” he groaned.

“Lance,” Keith choked out. 

He ripped off his gloves, cupping Lance’s face with both hands. Lance let out a soft sigh, turning his nose into Keith’s hand. 

Keith’s chest ached. 

“Why did you do that?” He whispered.

Lance hummed, eyelashes fluttering. “You know why.”

“Shut up,” Keith’s eyes blurred. “Shut the fuck up. You don’t get to say that to me now.”

Lance huffed out a laugh. “Hate to be the bearer of bad news, babe, but I’m not sure when I’ll be able to tell you again.”

“Shut up ,” Keith hurried to press his hand against the wound, trying to staunch the flow.

“Stop telling me to shut up,” Lance’s eyes rolled back before he fought them forward again. “Because I have a lot of things to tell you and I think I’m already running on borrowed time.” 

Blood seeped out from under Keith’s fingers. 

“Lance–.”

“I’m sorry,” Lance whispered, lips brushing against Keith’s palm. “I should have told you sooner. I–I panicked, because you were forced to tell me and I could tell you weren’t ready and I honestly wasn’t either.”

“Stop talking, Lance,” Keith’s voice hitched around sobs. 

He could hear the sound of shouting. He looked down the window to see his friends running towards him, holding a stretcher. 

Pidge was waving their arms, shouting something that Keith couldn’t place. 

Something about glass. 

"I tried to tell you so many times," Lance whispered. "I'm sorry." 

Pidge mimed shooting a gun. 

Realization dawned. 

“I gonna get you out of here,” Keith whispered. "Then you can tell me." 

He kept one hand on the bleeding wound, using the other to fumble with Lance’s seat belt. The straps wouldn’t retract. 

Keith tugged at them, letting out a hoarse cry. 

“ Fuck !” He hissed. “Come on, come on, come–.” 

“It’s not love,” Lance breathed, lips red. “Not yet.” 

He let out a rattling breath, lungs tired. His eyes glowed in the mess of sweat and red. 

“But I was so excited to get there,” Lance whispered. “To turn it into love.”

Keith could have wept .

“ You will,” Keith said with clenched teeth, digging his fingers into the jammed seat belt. “I swear to God you are going to make it to love.” 

Lance chuckled. “Someone’s eager.”

“Yeah, well,” Keith’s chest was tight as he fumbled for the console, “who’s surprised?” 

He ripped out Lance’s bayard from the console. Blue let out a hum, going to sleep.

Keith gripped the bayard, staring at the weapon desperately. 

“Come on,” he whispered. “Come on, come on, come on, come on.”

The bayard whirled under his fingertips, shifting into a small laser gun. Nothing close to what it looked like when Lance held it, but it was good enough. 

“Hot,” Lance mumbled. 

With a huff, Keith hooked his feet into the tilt of Lance’s chair. He covered Lance’s face with his arm and shot blindly at the side of the main window. 

He remembered Pidge once mentioning how the Alteans had constructed a safety measure in the glass. It was impenetrable on the outside, but escapable from the inside. 

The glass shattered, slicing into Keith’s skin. 

The sound and wind whistled in, their friends’ voices clearer but still unintelligible as Keith shook from adrenaline. He unsheathed his dagger. 

He lifted the blade to the thin slip of fabric in the belt. 

“This is going to hurt.”

Lance stiffened slightly. 

“A lot.”

Keith looked down at the window. In five excruciating seconds, Lance could be on a stretcher on the way to a pod.

His forehead dropped to Keith’s. 

Keith squeezed his eyes shut. “I love you.”

Lance smiled. “I will too.”

Keith gritted his teeth, sliced through Lance’s seat belt, and they fell. 

***

I’m so fucking in love with you. 

***

Consciousness slipped in. 

Lazily, like sand tumbling through an hourglass. 

First, Keith found his fingers in the haze. He curled and uncurled them, then wiggled his toes, and then opened and closed his jaw. 

There came a whirl of air and a rush of sound and Keith was tumbling forward. 

Strong arms caught him, tucking his face into a broad shoulder. 

“I got you.”

Keith peeled his eyes open, letting out a low groan. 

It took a couple blinks for his eyes to focus. He was in the control room, having just fallen out of the healing pod. Allura, Pidge, and Hunk smiled wearily at him, eyes tired. Coran offered a nod from where he was busily tapping on a screen. 

Shiro steadied him, keeping him balanced as he found his footing. 

“What happened?”

Pidge grimaced. “We only had one stretcher.”

“You both fell,” Hunk added morosely. “And, look, we had to decide who to catch and you were better off so–.”

Keith tuned him out, spinning around with a gasp as his memory returned like a lurch of cold water. His legs protested, pain arching up, but he hardly noticed. 

Lance was in the healing pod next to him. His face was calm, eyes closed and lips drawn into a simple line. 

Keith pressed his hands against the glass, scanning for any injuries. His entire body throbbed, but he ignored it. 

“The ion blast caused Blue’s interior to shift,” Pidge said from behind him. “A shard of shrapnel was what was embedded in his side. He lost a lot of blood, broke his hip when you two fell, but otherwise, he should be fine.”

He should be fine. 

Keith’s ears surged with buzzing. He stared blankly at Lance’s pod, not able to quite believe it. 

“He’s alright?”

Shiro’s hand settled on his shoulder. “You saved him, kiddo. He’s gonna be fine.”

Keith’s legs were on fire.

Keith sucked in two sharp gasps, felt heat rise to his face, and promptly fainted. 

***

The consciousness came to him much less gently the second time. 

The smell of antiseptic came first, a bitter cleanliness, and then a sharp voice.

“I mean, what were you guys thinking? You tell someone who’s fresh out of pod that their pal somehow cheated death and don’t prepare to catch him? That is so annoying, guys. Remember when Hunk thought Pidge was a goner and felt flat on his face when they came back from the dead? We know this, we have a protocol for a reason–.”

Keith groaned and the voice stopped short. 

A cool hand rested on his forehead. “Wakey, wakey, handsome.”

It was much easier this time to open his eyes. 

Keith squinted, adjusting the bright lights above him. 

Shiro let out a sigh of relief, while Hunk looked a little sheepish. 

“Sorry, Keith,” Pidge winced. “Turns out you weren’t quite ready to get out of the pod yet. Your equilibrium was all jacked. Two broken legs and a wrecked tailbone will do that to you.”

“What?” Keith mumbled.

“When we fell, you landed legs first, babe.” 

Keith blinked and fell into blue. 

Lance’s eyes twinkled as he smoothed back more of Keith’s hair. 

“You’re okay,” Keith whispered. 

“Thanks to you,” Lance winked. “I suppose we are even.”

***

I’m so fucking in love with you. 

***

Despite two naps in a pod, Keith was still unsteady on his feet. 

Annoyingly, Lance was completely healed, to the point that he was able to help Keith limp back to his room. 

“Before we fell, I envisioned nursing you back to health,” Keith murmured, wincing as he shifted his weight.

“Oh,” Lance sent a daring smile his way. “Kinky.”

“Shut up.”

“I shall never,” he said cheerfully as he guided Keith to the codepad. “Especially since I know you like it.”

“Who said I like it?”

“You, several times.”

“Hm.”

“There’s more than a hundred alien articles quoting you, actually.”

“Crazy.”

Lance snorted as he helped Keith to his bed. 

Keith laid back on the pillows with a sigh, closing his eyes as the twitches of pain faded. 

Despite spending so long in the pods, he could easily fall asleep again. 

The bed shifted next to him. 

Keith opened an eye to see Lance goodnaturedly tucking himself in next to Keith.

“What are you–.”

“I’ll be honest,” Lance said simply as he settled in, “I definitely thought I was going to die. Feeling a bit weird about it, actually. Everything is a little surreal. So, I, uh, would like to hang with you. If that’s okay. You calm me.”

Keith felt his lips twitch. “I calm you?”

Lance lifted an eyebrow, mouth curling into a curious smile. “Yeah? What, is that just super embarrassing–.”

Lance didn’t get to finish before Keith was kissing him. 

He didn’t hesitate, sliding his palms over Keith’s cheeks and tangling his fingers into Keith’s hair. 

Throwing out concern about twinges and snags of pain, Keith tugged Lance closer, closer, closer, until he was on top of him. A steadying weight, heavy and warm and breathing. He could feel the cut of Lance’s hipbones, the curve of a toned abdomen, the give to strong thighs. 

Keith wanted to drown in Lance, to only see, feel, and breathe in him. 

He wanted it all. He wanted harder than he had ever wanted anything in his life. It was a deep, unrelenting craving. He wanted to feel the arch of Lance’s hips and the strength of his hands and the bracket of his thighs. He wanted to taste his tongue and the salt of his skin. He wanted anything and everything all at once. 

He gripped the front of Lance’s shirt, too aware that he was trembling from the force of it all. 

Their foreheads knocked together, teeth clacking as Lance grinned. 

“Sorry,” Keith whispered. “I’m just–.”

“It’s alright,” Lance murmured. 

Lance kissed him again. 

“We have time.”