Chapter Text
Swaying on her feet drunkenly, Sasha pulled out her phone; blowing her blonde hair out of her face. Squinting at the doubled image of the device, she fumbled around until a text window popped up. Making a triumphant noise, she leaned on the bar as she typed out a mess of a message.
Sasha: Hay Felli. m’stillasthe bar.
*Translation: Hi Felli. I’m still at the bar
After what seemed like a long time to her alcohol fogged mind, there was a response. A response she had to really focus to be able to make out.
Unknown: Is this what you Midgardians would call a bot?
Squinting, Sasha fought to understand what any of that meant. Giggling, she sipped at the glass of whiskey in front of her.
Sasha: Wish ywere here Felli. Could hjlp medrik my sorows awy.
*Translation: Wish you were here Felli. You could help me drink my sorrows away.
There was a longer pause as the young woman looked blearily down at the ice floating in the amber liquid.
Unknown: Ah, this would appear to be what is referred to as a drunk text. I am not this Felli you think you are talking to.
Frowning, Sasha didn’t really absorb the words she was reading. She was far too drunk to make much sense out of the complex sentence.
Sasha: yknw, m jealus. u hve michal an i have no one. dun evn hav a crush on nyone. wel, no one rel nywy,
*Translation: You know, I’m jealous. You have Michael and I have no one. I don’t even have a crush on anyone. Well, no one real anyway.
Finishing her drink, she set the glass aside before staring down at her phone. Her earlier cheery mood was now gone, tears in her blue eyes. The whole reason she’d come here was to hook up with a handsome man. Maybe get out of her rut of not having dates. She had been crushed when no one so much as even looked her way. To say it had been a blow to her self esteem would be an understatement.
Unknown: Since it does not seem like you can understand I am not this friend of yours, I suppose I can listen to your problems.
Blinking, Sasha managed to make out bits and pieces, a muzzy feeling of confusion welling up inside her. After taking a sip of her water, she began to type a response.
Sasha: cn i tel ya asecrt? I wsh he was rel al thtime
Translation: Can I tell you a secret? I wish he was real all the time.
Feeling the prickle of tears, she sniffled them back before taking another sip of her water. Behind her, music played and people danced.
Unknown: Before you tell me who this fantasy man is, are you drinking water?
Smiling at Felli’s concern, Sasha felt a bit of her good mood return. She could always count on her dearest friend to have her back.
Sasha: yup. jst stoped drinkn. n yknw who heis, hes Loki frm hmrvl mvies
Translation: Yup. I just stopped drinking. And you know who he is. He’s Loki from the Marvel movies.
Downing the rest of her water, she ordered another. As drunk as she was, some part of her clung to a small bit of rationality. Just enough to remember that hangovers really sucked ass. Sipping at the fresh glass, she felt a bit concerned at how long it was taking for Felli to respond this time. She was about to prod her when a new message popped up.
Unknown: My little mortal, you have no idea how wrong of a number you have dialed
Blinking, she giggled at Felli’s attempts to sound like the movie version of a certain Norse God.
Sasha: cant fool me. knw itsu felli.
Translation: You can’t fool me. I know its you Felli.
Still chuckling, Sasha took a sip of her water. Then she was pulling up the Uber app, inputting a request for a ride home. After all, she hadn’t brought her car. She’d known she’d be in no condition to drive tonight.
Unknown: And I keep telling you that I am not this Felli.
There was a brief pause before another text appeared on the screen. Squinting, Sasha read what her friend had sent.
Unknown: You mentioned earlier that you were in this state because this ‘Loki’ was the only person you found yourself attracted to.
Grimacing, she hated how Felli got right to the heart of the matter. Pouting, she finished her glass of water and got to her feet carefully.
Sasha: gues I nevr tolu. Knda mbarasd. Nt norml to lke a fak prson,
*Translation: Guess I never told you. I’m kinda embarrassed. Its not normal to like a fake person.
Leaning on the bar, she paused to get her bearings. There was also the small matter that things were spinning a bit around her.
Unknown: Do me a favor and go find a safe spot to sit for a moment.
Sighing, Sasha canceled the Uber and looked up at the room she was in. Felli was right. If she got into an Uber now, she would be easy bait if the person driving was a creep. So, as steadily as she could, she made her way to a booth that was away from the worst of the crowd.
Unknown: Are you safe yet, little mortal?
Rolling her eyes at her friend’s dedication, Sasha lifted her phone to respond. As she wrote, just a hint of irritation rose within her.
Sasha: Tolu srop prtendin ur loji
*Translation: I told you to stop pretending you’re Loki.
Unknown: We can continue our discussion about me not being this Felli after you answer my question.
The almost instant response had her a bit surprised. Soon she was shrugging it off, still too drunk to care about too much.
Sasha: jus satdwn. Ina quoet coner
*Translation: I just sat down. I’m in a quiet corner.
Unknown: Right, can you do me a favor and stay there for me? At least until you sober up enough to listen to read what I’m typing to you.
Smiling at the request, Sasha sat back before a yawn left her. As much as she wanted to follow the advice of her friend, the alcohol she’d drunk was catching up to her. If she didn't leave soon, she ran the real risk of passing out on the table.
Sasha: shoul only sray amin. M tire
*Translation: I should only stay a minute. I’m tired.
For several minutes, Felli began to type a message before stopping and starting all over again. Yawning again, Shasha rubbed her eyes as a bone deep weariness settled over her. Just as she was about to pull up the Uber app, a new message popped onto her screen.
Unknown: Just a few more moments. I almost have a bead on what reality you’re in, little mortal.
Staring at the text, she honestly wondered just how drunk she really was. Shaking her head to clear it, she stared at the message. To her consternation, it stayed the same.
Sasha: wha utalkin bou? U have too mucwine?
*Translation: What are you talking about? Did you have too much wine?
Unknown: Be there in a second.
Even more confused, she shrugged and lay on the table. She would just shut her eyes for a second. Just a second. Just a... Suddenly, Sasha is started awake by a very gentle pair of hands shaking her. For just a moment, panic filled her as she looked at the person next to her with blurry eyes. “My, we are quite drunk tonight,” tutted an accented baritone. A voice that tickled at a memory buried in the back of her head. Then large but gentle hands were very carefully helping her to her feet.
“There you go, up you get. Let's get you home,” it urged quietly in her ear, making her shudder all over.
Then he was helping her out of the bar, carefully steadying her as they moved. “Such a state for a lone woman to be in. All because of loneliness,” grumbled a complaint as she found herself steered into a nearby alley. Before she could begin to question what was happening, green light surrounded them and the world spun like a top.
Swaying as her stomach flopped, Sasha leaned into the man holding her. The scent of pine and snow washed over her, making her shudder slightly. Drawing in a sharp breath, her companion let out a soft chuckle before helping her regain her footing. Staggering, she looked around and was a bit shocked to see she was in her apartment. As much as she would like to blame this on being too drunk, she had never in her life gotten so smashed that she forgot events. “H-how’d we git t’mah home?” she slurred out as the man behind her gently steered her to her room.
“Magic,” came a soft reply as the green light cocooned her again.
As soon as it disappeared, she found her clothes had changed to a favorite pair of her pajamas. Looking down in vague consternation, she took the hem of her shirt in her right hand and rubbed. “Mus bea helluva dream,” she muttered to herself before yawning.
“Nevermind, little mortal. For now, sleep,” came a quiet suggestion that sounded a bit like an order.
Nodding at the suggestion, Sasha clambered onto the silk sheets. The moment her skin hit the fabric, her body began to shut down. Not even covering herself, the drunk woman fell into a deep sleep. Sighing, her companion carefully pulled the comforter over her. “We will speak again tomorrow. Then, maybe you will be able to believe who I am,” he murmured, brushing a bit of her hair out of her face before simply blinking out of existence.